#It just feels batshit insane to consider kai one

[ancient-romes]

how fucking old is Kai supposed to be in season 5? She jokes about not being old enough to join the army and Grif believes it well enough. Lopez calls her a teenager. there's a deleted scene of her talking about algebra homework. She's had several abortions goes to raves and does drugs. What the fuck

[salvatoreschool]

Every The Vampire Diaries, The Originals, and Legacies Ship Ranked

53. Daroline (Damon Salvatore and Caroline Forbes)

Our first ship is our worst ship because we can't find literally anything nice to say about Daroline. Consent issues, mind-control, and death threats are not exactly the stuff of great romance, and Damon should thank his lucky stars Caroline forgave him for this abominable period when they were together.

52. Calaric (Caroline Forbes and Alaric Saltzman)

Ew. Gross. No. Kill it with fire. We've got no idea what The Vampire Diaries was trying to do with this ship, but we hated every second of it, and we're not ashamed to say it. We don't care that years had passed since Caroline was his student or that there were weirder ages gaps on the show, trying to ship a student-teacher relationship feels wrong no matter which way you slice it.

51. Klenevieve (Klaus Mikaelson and Genevieve)

Klenevieve was a blink and you'll miss it kind of ship on The Originals, but it still technically counts. Ultimately though, Klaus and Genevieve's connection was mostly physical, and there were far too many double-crosses and manipulations on both sides of this relationship to give it much credit.

50. Parkwood (Liv Park and Tyler Lockwood)

Liv and Tyler's love story kind of flew under the radar on The Vampire Diaries, but that's probably just because there were like 18 insane storylines happening at once in Season 6. This ship was actually pretty cute, and the only thing keeping it from a better ranking is the fact that Tyler, you know, killed her with his bare hands to activate his werewolf curse.

49. Malaric (Meredith Fell and Alaric Saltzman)

Talk about ships that flew under the radar. Alaric and Meredith Fell shared a brief tryst in Seasons 3 and 4 of The Vampire Diaries, but this relationship always felt like it was built to move the plot forward instead of the other way around. Kind of too snooze-worthy to deserve a good ranking.

48. Menny (Matt Donovan and Penny Ares)

We're not going to pretend like we cared even a little about Matt and Penny's romance on The Vampire Diaries. However, we're also not going to pretend like the scene where Matt hallucinates her ghost and begs her to take him with her after his car crash was anything other than devastating emotional torture that came out of nowhere and has stayed with us to this day.

47. Jolaric (Jo Parker and Alaric Saltzman)

Jo and Alaric really got the rough end of the stick as far as TVD ships go. They'd only just started to find their groove when Jo found out she was pregnant with twins, forcing them into a shotgun wedding that ended in tragedy. If these two had been given the time to start their family together the way they should have, we have no doubt they could have become one of the show's best duos ever. We'll have to settle for them creating one of the best duos ever -- Josie and Lizzie Saltzman!

46. Rizzie (Rafael Waithe and Lizzie Saltzman)

It's hard not to ship all of the Legacies kids with each other considering the great chemistry that cast has, but Rizzie is one we just never loved. Lizzie seems too intense for Rafael, and Raf doesn't exactly seem like the kind of guy that would give her the level of attention and devotion she requires. This ship was kind of a flop in Sesason 1, and we'd prefer it stay that way.

45. Debekah (Damon Salvatore and Rebekah Mikaelson)

Damon and Rebekah shared one night of tearing ballgowns and tuxes off each other, and then it was never really spoken of again. It's hard to properly rank a ship that basically came down to "that one time we had hate sex," but hookups like this were what The Vampire Diaries was built on.

44. Haylijah (Hayley Marshall and Elijah Mikaelson)

We really wanted to rank Haylijah higher on this list, but all the passion and angst in the world can't distract us from the cold hard truth: Hayley and Elijah had issues. Major issues. Not the least of which being that he killed her in the final season of the show. Whether you consider their love story to be one of the best or worst this shared universe ever created, at least you can comfort yourself with the knowledge that they gave it all they had.

43. Klaurora (Klaus Mikaelson and Aurora de Martel)

For as long as we've known Klaus, he was always teetering on the brink of insanity, which is kind of what we loved most about him. Aurora, on the other hand, has been batshit crazy her whole life and it's so not a good look on her. This weird, obsessive, "let's see who can out-crazy the other" romance was not to our taste at all.

42. KymG (Kym and MG)

We can't claim to be huge fans of the romance between Kim and MG on Legacies, though their names fit together so perfectly for a ship name that we almost demand they be endgame based only on that. Unfortunately, the show never really gave them the screen time they needed to get us invested in their love story before Kym decided she'd had enough superantural shenanigans and left Mystic Falls.

41. Elijah Mikaelson and Antoinette Sienna

On every TV show, there are ships that just make us shrug, and Elijah and Antoniette are definitely one of those. They don't even have a ship name, that's forgettable this tryst was. Even with memory loss, hidden pasts, and romantic pinao duets, this couple was kind of just meh.

40. Sizzie (Sebastian and Lizzie Saltzman)

Sebastian and Lizzie may have had potential, but in the end it turned out to be wasted. Their chemistry was off the charts, but like many teenagers swept up in romance, they never really took the time to connect or learn about each other. Maybe that's why they ended on such a sour note. Still, at least Sebastian went out a hero?

39. Jicki (Jeremy Gilbert and Vicki Donovan)

You know, we were really rooting for Jeremy and Vicki when The Vampire Diaries first started. They had that whole, rebels who are too cool for school, but not too cool for love thing going on. Ultimately though, we don't think Vicki would have ever calmed down enough for Jeremy, who was really only pretending to be a wild child to deal with his parents' deaths. This ship just wasn't to be.

38. Maroline (Matt Donovan and Caroline Forbes)

You know those Season 1 ships that you know are never going to make it, but every time you look back on them they make you nostalgic? That's what Maroline is for us. A cute relationship between two characters we love dearly that just never quite fit perfectly together. That being said, if there had been no vampires or life-or-death scenarios in Mystic Falls, Maroline absolutely would have been endgame material.

37. Stalerie (Stefan Salvatore and Valerie Tulle)

Stefan and Valerie had one of the weirdest love stories we've ever seen, but there was still a small part of us that was rooting for them. In a world not besieged by curses and vampire hunters and prison worlds, these two could have really been something! Sadly, Stefan has like five more appealing ships, which is probably why they never really made it that far.

36. Hafael (Hope Mikaelson and Rafael Waithe)

Legacies made a solid attempt to recreate another brotherly love triangle, but we weren't really feeling it with Rafael, Hope, and Landon. Raf and Hope have a great friendship going, but it's probably best left there considering how much more fans seem to prefer her relationship with Landon.

35. Marcille (Marcel Gerard and Camille O'Connell)

Remember when Marcel and Camille were a thing for a hot minute? Neither do we! Sorry to Marcille fans, but though these two had decent chemistry, they just never got a lot of attention as a couple, and so their love story kind of faded into obscurity.

34. Jasie (Jade and Josie Saltzman)

The Vampire Diaries universe sure does love its enemies to lovers ships, doesn't it? Josie and Jade started off on opposing sides in Kai's prison world, but after Jade turned her humanity back on, things started to change between them. At least the sex dreams they started having about each other did. Jade and Josie might be perfect for one another, seeing as they both understand having a dark side that's hard to deny.

33. Carenzo (Caroline Forbes and Enzo St. John)

While Caroline and Enzo never made it past the friendzone, we wouldn't have hated it if they'd had a thing. There was a lack of "epic love story" vibes between them, and when Enzo was at his worst, Caroline brought out the light-hearted, carefree side of him. Plus, all things considered, he really was her type - morally scrupulous Brit, who would burn the world down for the people he loves -- why does that sound familiar?

32. Mizzie (M.G. and Lizzie Saltzman)

Every day we go back and forth on whether MG and Lizzie are soulmates or whether they're the perfect best friend duo of all time. Could they possibly be both? Sure, Lizzie takes MG for granted sometimes, and MG can be a little thoughtless sometimes, but that doesn't mean these two aren't connected in a deep, meaningful way that most people can only dream of.

31. Noralise (Nora and Mary-Louise)

Though we only got them for one season, Nora and Mary-Louise had us from the moment they said hello. We do love a bad girl, and two bad girls together? We're toast! Our favorite thing about this ship is that while it was clear Nora and Mary-Louise didn't care about much in this world, they cared about each other, and that was more than enough for them.

30. Klayley (Klaus Mikaelson and Hayley Marshall)

When The Originals first premiered, we were sure Klaus and Hayley would eventually fall in love and live happily ever after with their precious loophole baby, but ultimately these two just weren't meant to be anything more than one really hot night. That being said, watching them as co-parents just proves that not all ships need to be romantic to work.

29. Rope (Roman Sienna and Hope Mikaelson)

Roman and Hope's sweet, timid flirtation on The Originals was like a breath of fresh air after some of the intense, life-changing, epic love stories we'd been getting for five straight years. Rope -- whoever came up with that ship name was having too much fun that day -- would have ranked higher if the whole relationship wasn't just Roman's ploy to get close to Hope's family.

28. Stebekah (Stefan Salvatore and Rebekah Mikaelson)

The Vampire Diaries had the best flashbacks on TV, hands down, partially because when your characters have lived for centuries, you can really mix things up. One of said mix-ups was the revelation that Stefan and Rebekah had been an item back in the 1920s, and while their romance is probably best left in the age of prohibition, it was always one of our favorites.

27. Hizzie (Hope Mikaelson and Lizzie Saltzman)

Hope and Lizzie would definitely have that whole "enemies to lovers" thing going for them if they ever decided to take the plunge together. The bond we've seen these two develop over the course of Legacies has been so wonderful to watch, and while at the moment we prefer them as badass besties, we wouldn't hate to see them head towards romantic territory someday.

26. Janna (Jeremy Gilbert and Anna Zhu)

When The Vampire Diaries first paired Jeremy and Anna together, we thought our little vampire-loving hearts would give out. They were both so damaged and dark and alone in the world that they somehow fit perfectly together. Not even multiple deaths could keep them apart! Losing this one was hard, but at least ghost Anna came back to hang out occasionally.

25. Datherine (Damon Salvatore and Katherine Pierce)

Call us crazy, but even through all the craziness and manipulation, there seemed to be a spark of something between Damon and Katherine that was just undeniable. Maybe it was the fact that they both put up a dark and diabolical front to mask their real feelings about the way their lives turned out. This wasn't a ship for the ages, but it certainly was a pairing we'll remember forever.

24. Kennett (Kol Mikaelson and Bonnie Bennett)

You know a fandom is strong when it can build a ship of dreams out of like 2 episodes and 10 lines of dialogue, but that's about all Bonnie Bennett and Kol Mikaelson ever shared. And yet somehow, Kennett is always going to feel like the one that got away in terms of ships that totally should've happened but never did.

23. Klamille (Klaus Mikaelson and Camille O'Connell)

Despite their messy ending, Klaus and Camille's relationship showed us sides of each character that we otherwise would never have seen. Though it was missing some of the passion usually found in The Vampire Diaries and The Originals ships, it was still absolutely heartbreaking to watch Klaus lose a woman who meant so much to him when Cami died.

22. Jandon (Josie Saltzman and Landon Kirby)

This short-lived romance between Josie and Landon may not have been super popular with fans, but it was perfectly in character for both these self-sacrificing loners to find their way to one another. It may not have been a romance for the ages, but it was an age-appropriate and utterly endearing one, and that's good enough for us!

21. Kolvina (Kol Mikaelson and Davina Claire)

As one of the few ships that managed to make it out of The Originals series finale alive, we have to give Kol and Davina props. Their love story survived multiple deaths, body-swaps, and that pesky problem of Kol accidentally murdering Davina that one time. We want nothing more than peace and happiness for eternity for these two crazy kids.

20. Jalaric (Jenna Sommers and Alaric Saltzman)

While some believe Alaric's love life is cursed, those of us who watched the early years of The Vampire Diaries know better. Alaric will simply never find someone as perfect for him as Jenna Sommers, which means he's destined to fall in and out of subpar ships forever. Poor guy, it's rough when your soulmate dies so early on in the first of three sequential shows.

19. Klefan (Klaus Mikaelson and Stefan Salvatore)

This one's another ship was never technically canon, but as far as we're concerned that was a GRAVE mistake. Klaus and Stefan had chemistry coming out of their ears, and you're seriously trying to tell us that nothing happened between these two during their days of debauchery in the 1920s? Yeah right, you're not fooling us!

18. Jayley (Jackson Kenner and Hayley Marshall)

Jackson and Hayley may not have had the passion and the fire that some of the best TVD ships boasted, but they had something that very few other pairings had: A rock-solid friendship built on trust and understanding that grew organically into true love. Considering how crazy their world was, they both needed a relationship like this to keep them sane, which is maybe why we ended up loving it so much?

17. Kalijah (Katherine Pierce and Elijah Mikaelson)

Katherine and Elijah only shared maybe a handful of scenes together over the entire course of The Vampire Diaries, but they're somehow one of three ships we would have watched an entire spin-off about. Their love stood the test of time and somehow overcame hybrid-sized grudges, and that's about as romantic as it gets.

16. Rebel (Rebekah Mikaelson and Marcel Gerard)

Though we love Marcel and Rebekah (especially when we think about the day they both take the cure and grow old together), this couple had one major problem... One of them wasn't on the show all that often, which meant their romance faded to the background every time Rebekah left town -- which was a lot. We'll put this in the category of ships that were done dirty by logistical, behind-the-scenes stuff.

15. Bamon (Bonnie Bennett and Damon Salvatore)

The Bamon saga was one of the most topsy-turvey things to follow on The Vampire Diaries, but we loved every minute of it. From shipping them a little bit in Season 1 to hating everything about it in Season 3, to watching them grow into best buds in Season 6, Bonnie and Damon went on a journey unparalleled by any other ship in the TVDu. Do we kind of wish they'd given romance a try? Sure. Are we going to let that invalidate how awesome their story was? No way.

14. Gialijah (Gia and Elijah Mikaelson

We're probably going to get some hate for this, but if we had to pick between all of Elijah's ships, Gialijah would probably win out. Sure, they weren't star-crossed lovers or centuries-old flames, but if you're looking for a healthy dynamic (of which Elijah was sorely lacking) with great chemistry and some awesome scenes, Gialijah is the ship for you.

13. Handon (Hope Mikaelson and Landon Kirby)

Hope and Landon are kind of the Stelena of Legacies. Not a pairing that we think will be endgame (no matter how heartbroken that will leave us), but integral to the DNA of the series nonetheless. We're content to enjoy this sweet couple strive for their happy ending, and we'll even root for them most of the time as they grow up together and figure out this crazy supernatural world.

12. Jaiden (Josh Rosza and Aiden)

Oh, Josh and Aiden... the ship that was too pure for this world. Literally. Though both these characters bit the dust before all was said and done on The Originals, their love story was super sweet, and, hey, at least we got to see them reunite in the afterlife!

11. Beremy (Bonnie and Jeremy)

If any of you ever had a crush on your older brother or sister's friends, you'll understand our undying love for Beremy. There was something so cathartic about watching Bonnie realize that Jeremy had grown up to be a sweet, sexy, utterly dateable guy instead of Elena's annoying little brother. Even though the didn't end up together, they deserve a high ranking in this list of epic ships.

10. Posie (Penelope Park and Josie Saltzman)

Considering how few episodes of Legacies Penelope was in before she bounced, it's remarkable that so many people fell so deep in love with the Posie ship. We guess there's just something intoxicating about a bad girl who will do bad things for the girl she loves. If you come for Josie, Penelope will come for you!

9. Steferine (Stefan Salvatore and Katherine Pierce)

Is it weird that we always kind of thought Stefan and Katherine would end up together when all was said and done? Don't get us wrong, that relationship was toxic at best, but when they were on screen together, you just couldn't pull your eyes away from them. It was like watching a really sexy, complicated train wreck in action.

8. Forwood (Caroline Forbes and Tyler Lockwood)

Considering how often Caroline and Tyler were separated (by distance, evil hybrids, or opposing loyalties), it's pretty impressive that they were still one of the most memorable ships from The Vampire Diaries. It some mixed the sweetness of Maroline with the passion of Klaroline, creating a happy middle ground for fans to enjoy.

7. Freelin (Freya Mikaelson and Keelin Malraux)

Did we really understand the term OTP before Freelin existed? We doubt it. Freya and Keelin had their ups and downs on The Originals, to be sure, but through it all, there was never a doubt in our minds that these two strong, smart, sexy women were absolutely made for one another. Knowing they're living out their happily ever after in New Orleans with a cute little baby named Nik is the only thing that gets us through the day sometimes.

6. Steroline (Stefan Salvatore and Caroline Forbes)

Considering how many ships exist in this universe, it's shocking that Steroline is one of only a handful to make it down the aisle. Poor Stefan seemed doomed to be forever locked in a love triangle with his brother until Caroline Forbes entered his life. Not only did he no longer have to deal with love triangle BS, he got to marry his best friend, who he knew would support him through thick and thin. If only it hadn't taken them so long to figure out how awesome they could be together.

5. Benzo (Bonnie Bennett and Enzo St. John)

Sometimes it's hard to ship characters that are thrown together at the end of a series as opposed to the beginning, but that was not the case with Bonnie and Enzo. One minute they were two characters who'd never really interacted much, and the next they were epic loves who built a strong relationship built on trust, compassion, and a lot of laughter. Honestly, they fit so well together even we were surprised by it!

4. Stelena (Stefan Salvatore and Elena Gilbert)

Of all the ships to ever grace our screens over the years, there was something truly special about Stefan and Elena. Maybe it's because we associate their love story with some of the best years The Vampire Diaries ever had, or maybe their connection really was just too epic for words. Whatever the case, Stelena was one for the history books, and we dare you to say different.

3. Hosie (Hope Mikaelson and Josie Saltman)

It might seem weird to put a ship that's not, technically speaking, canon (yet!) so high on our list, but we absolutely won't apologize for it. Putting aside the obvious fact that these girls are definitely, majorly, into each other, Hope and Josie have proven over and over again that they not only understand each other on a deep, intimate level, they also care enough about one another to go to the ends of the earth to keep each other safe and happy. That kind of devotion when paired with a healthy, supportive dynamic is a killer combination.

2. Klaroline (Klaus Mikaelson and Caroline Forbes)

Klaus and Caroline never really got the timing right, but maybe that's what makes this ship one of the best in the history of The Vampire Diaries universe. They were enemies, they were lovers, and they were kind of even friends for a minute there, and the fact that they never really got a chance to be together only makes this ship more EPIC. Plus, it's kind of impossible not to swoon when a guy declares he'll be your last love.

1. Delena (Damon Salvatore and Elena Gilbert)

Was there ever any doubt that this list would end here? Whether you loved Delena or not, there's no denying this couple was iconic, and a large part of The Vampire Diaries' success was built on their love story. Sure, we would have preferred for them to not have different versions of the same fight for four seasons in a row, but that doesn't mean we don't still get major chills whenever we rewatch their first kiss or their series finale happily ever after.

[droplet-dread-cat]

Hey, I wanna quickly break your heart with the

Sanji is reincarnated as Zuko AU

Suddenly, he’s a prince again. He’s alone once more. He has a sister but unlike Reiju, Azula is set on physically and mentally breaking him. His mother, Ursa, is just as kind as Sora was... and she vanishes from his life just a quick. For the second time, there’s a father who wants him dead. A father who thinks he doesn’t deserve his title. A father who trains him to the ground and leaves him battered and broken. His only friends are the turtleducks in the palace’s pond but when Azula finds out, they’re cruelly set on fire and Sanji has to watch. Sometimes he feels as if his life as Sanji had never happened. As if the Straw Hats are just a product of his imagination.

Sanji-as-Zuko grows up empty and fragile like a seashell. For as long as he’s been alive, he’s craved a cigarette and can’t stop his hands which used to be so firm and sure from shaking - his hands that he has to fight with because Ozai beats him black and blue when he refuses to. His only joy apart from the turtleducks is cooking. But Azula finds out quickly and uses it against him.

When he is thirteen, he wants to know more about the war that’s going on. Foolishly, because he’s always been too kind-hearted, he speaks out against the slaughter of an entire division of young soldiers. He accepts the Agni Kai, mainly because Ozai would beat him up again if he didn’t. There is no haki in this world. When he turns around on the tribune, he feels as if this is it. This is the end of this life. It’s done. And Sanji just kneels, peacefully at last as he says “Make it quick.”

The next thing he knows is an unimaginable pain and then he wakes up on a boat. His uncle is at his side - and he’s reminded of Zeff when the old man directs his kind eyes towards him. “How are you feeling, Prince Zuko?” he asks. Sanji’s stomach revolts at the idea of being seriously called prince (it was alright on Little Garden because he used it sarcastically but this? No, he can’t do it.) so he says “Please... just Zuko.”

Iroh and Sanji slowly get to know each other better - and Iroh finds out Sanji’s not inclined on going Avatar hunting (which he’s very happy about). They open up a floating tea shop/restaurant called the Jasmine Dragon and Sanji’s of course internally aching all the time because he’s reminded of his time at the Baratie. He misses Zeff and all the other cooks so damn much. He misses his crew. But Iroh helps him immensly and teaches him how to firebend with his mouth and feet (because Sanji still refuses to use his hands). By the way, Sanji-as-Zuko grows his hair over his left eye and he basically has his pre-timeskip haircut. Obviously he smokes (but with one of those fancy long pipes)... and yes, his pervyness returnes as soon as his puberty kicks in. (Iroh kind of encourages it too, ngl)

One day, a happy-go-lucky kid claiming to be the Avatar lands with his four companions (Appa, Momo, Katara and Sokka) in front of the Jasmine Dragon. Of course Sanji goes with them. Even if he - just for old time’s sake - refuses the offer of joining this ragtag crew at first.

Parallels to consider:

- Sanji and Zuko both start out as princes and end up as sailors. - Sanji and Zuko are both stealthy (Stealth Black/Invisibility fruit and Blue Spirit) - Sanji and Zuko both end up at restaurants (kinda) - If Sanji were a fully realized Vinsmoke, he’d have black hair - They both wield fire. - They both have asshats as fathers. - Metal Helmet & Facial Scar traumas - Sanji kinda used double knifes in his fight against Wanze. - They’re both very kind but hide their kindness behind a facade. - They’re both on batshit insane crews.

[[Alternatively!: Sanji isn’t the only reincarnated Straw Hat. Luffy is Aang (of course), Zoro is Toph (Everybody’s like “We can’t give the blind girl a sword, much less three” and then their asses are beaten by Zoro lol) (or Jet or Suki - all three would fit for him, tbh), Usopp is Sokka, Nami is Katara, Chopper is Momo, the Klabautermann of the Merry/Sunny is Appa, Robin is Suki or Mai OR JUNE OMG, Franky is Combustion Man, Brook is Bumi (or the skeleton of monk Gyatso eiwoufherfughiehuirfuherfuheru), Jinbe is Iroh (he only remembers his past life when Luffy comes along) and if Carrot joins she’s Ty Lee]]

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

2010s Art: Music, Games, and TV

So I love all forms of art. It may not seem like it since I tend to stick mainly to movies, with the odd cartoon or video game thrown in, but that’s really because movies are more my thing due to not being massive time investments. Like, don’t get me wrong, I gamed, I watched TV, I listened to music, but it was a lot more casual than my deep dive into becoming a major cinephile.

With games and TV, it was mostly issues of money and time respectively. I have a few consoles, mostly Nintendo and Sony ones, and my wife helped me experience Xbox games, but I just don’t have the money needed to experience every good game that comes out. With TV, the time investment is the biggest roadblock, especially when all the best shows have hour-long episodes these days. With movies, I just have to spend 90 minutes to two hours on average; for TV, it’s countless hours I could be watching movies. As for music… well, I listened to a lot, I just don’t feel totally qualified to properly rank and list songs and albums.

So instead of the big decade-spanning list for movies that I’m doing, I’m going to go over some things I enjoyed from the past decade and maybe a few things I didn’t in music, TV, and video games. Here’s a little guide so you know what stuff is something I consider one of my absolute favorites in any given medium - if it’s from this decade, it will be in bold, and if it’s from a previous decade but I experienced it this decade, it will be underlined.

Television

I figured I’d get this out of the way first since it’s the medium I have the least experience with. Let me put it this way: I have seen only one season of Game of Thrones, the first one (and by all accounts I dodged a bullet by dropping that show). I also had the misfortune of jumping in to The Walking Dead right as it was gearing up for its abysmal second season, which turned me off that and led to me only watching an episode here or there. 

I had better luck watching live action shows on streaming. I managed to get through almost all of Pretty Little Liars on Netflix, which was a chore in and of itself; it’s a good show, but boy could it ever get arbitrary and frustrating. Speaking of Netflix, I think it goes without saying that Stranger Things is their best effort; from the likable cast of kids to the awesome soundtrack, even though it never really surpasses season one the show always has something cool going on in one of its plots. My other favorite from Netflix would probably be their take on A Series if Unfortunate Events, which is how you do adaptation expansion right; everything they add feels like it’s in service of fleshing out Lemony Snicket’s dismal world, as well as giving Patrick Warburton an incredible dramatic role as the Lemony narrator himself.

Amazon managed to score two hits in my book. The first is the unbelievably fun and charming Good Omens, a miniseries that somehow got me to love David Tennant and Michael Sheen more than I already did. The second was the gory joyride that is The Boys which while not the smartest or most original superhero satire is definitely the most fun.

While I didn’t watch the whole show and would not consider it one of my favorites, I do want to give props to Hannibal for introducing me to Mads Mikkelsen. As far as I’m concerned, he’s the only person aside from Hopkins worthy of playing everyone’s favorite cannibal. Another show I DO consider a favorite despite slacking on keeping up with it is Ash vs. Evil Dead; I only needed to see a single season of Bruce back with the boomstick to know this show was a masterpiece.

On the animated side I have much more to talk about. Not since the 90s have we been spoiled with so many genuinely great and varied cartoons. We got Adventure Time, Regular Show, Steven Universe… really, Cartoon Network raised the bar this decade and made up for an awful 2000s. They even finally gave Samurai Jack a conclusion, which despite the mixed results, was still a real exciting phenomenon to experience.

Of course, my favorite CN show came from Adult Swim. I am of course referring to Rick & Morty, a fun sci-fi adventure comedy that attracted the most obnoxious fanbase possible in record time. While certainly not a show you need a high IQ to understand and having an atrocious third season, it still manages to be funny and thought provoking in equal amounts. Seriously though. Fuck season 3.

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is another great show that I sadly fell off the wagon of around the fifth or sixth season. It never got bad of course but it never really engaged me like the older episodes, though what I’ve heard of the last season makes me wish I’d kept up with it. It was a great show with a lot of heart and character, and I’m not sure we’ll ever see a show like it again.

Netflix did not slack in the animation department; I didn’t catch their most famous show (it’s the one about a certain Horseman) but I did catch their fantastic take on Castlevania, which as a huge fan of the series was a real treat. Where the fuck is Grant though?

My two favorite shows of the decade, however, are what I see as the pinnacle of East and West: Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure and Gravity Falls. 

JJBA is a series I had vague passing knowledge of, only knowing its existence due to seeing Stone Ocean referenced on the Wikipedia page for air rods when I was younger and, of course, the memes that spawned from Heritage for the Future, which were inescapable back in the day. As soon as I got into the series, it became one of my biggest inspirations, teaching me you can be deep, complex, and filled with great character interactions while also being so batshit insane that every new and absurd power is incredibly easy to buy (looking forward to the rainbows that turn people into snails, animators). They managed to get through the first four parts and start up the fifth over the decade; so far my favorite part is four, mainly due to the magnificent bastard that is Yoshikage Kira (played time perfection by D.C. Douglas) and in spite of serial creep Vic Mangina playing the otherwise lovable asshole Rohan Kishibe.

Gravity Falls on the other hand is just a fun and engaging mystery show that manages to excel at being episodic and story-driven all at once. There’s only one or two “bad” episodes across two seasons, and it lasted just as long as it needed to, wrapping things up with a satisfactory ending that still gave fans a few mysteries to chew on. It also gave us Grunkle Stan, perhaps the greatest character in all of animation, the pinnacle of “jerk with a heart of gold” characters who is hilarious, badass, and complex all at once. This is my favorite western animated show…

...but then the last year of the decade threw a curveball and, if I’m being honest, is on par with Gravity Falls: Green Eggs and Ham. Netflix really wanted us to know 2D animation is back in 2019; between this show and Klaus, the future is looking bright for the medium. It’s a fun, funny roadtrip comedy that knows when to be emotional and when to be funny, and it’s all filtered through the wubbulous world of Dr. Seuss. It’s just a wonderfully delightful show.

And on the subject of JoJo, I had a kind of love-hate relationship with anime this decade. The attitudes of anime fans turned me off from anime for a long while. Sure, I checked out stuff like Attack on Titan and Sword Art Online, but neither series really clicked with me. The main anime I loved this decade were ones that started in the 2000s and ended in the 2010s, like Dragon Ball Z Kai and Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood. I suppose I did enjoy My Hero Academia, which is a really fun show with an awesome and varied cast and great voice acting. Love Froppy, best girl for sure.

One of the most unfortunate things about this decade was how many great shows got screwed over by their networks. Sym-Bionic Titan, Thundercats, and The Legend of Korra were all great shows in their own right but were treated like shit by their respective networks. It really makes me upset that stuff like that not only happened, but continues to happen to this day.

But let’s not end on a bad note; let’s talk about the astounding returns old shows got. Invader Zim got a movie as did Hey Arnold, with the latter in particular finally wrapping up the dangling plot threads, but those are actual TV movies so they don’t really fit here; what DOES fit is Static Cling, the triumphant return of Rocko’s Modern Life. A forty minute special, it follows Rocko and his friends as they navigate the modern age, trying to bring back Rocko’s favorite cartoon. Rachel Bighead’s arc in this in particular is pretty groundbreaking and awesome. 

Also awesome was the first few episodes of Samurai Jack’s return, though it did end up petering out halfway through the season and ended on an anticlimactic note. Still, Tom Kenny’s Scaramouche, the sheer amount of continuity, and the awesome final curbstomp battle against Aku are worth giving this a watch. And if nothing else, stuff like this gives me hope for future revivals. What will we see next? Gargoyles comeback? Batman Beyond continuation? KENNY AND THE CHIMP REVIVAL?! Chimpers rise up!

Music

Much like everyone, I listened to a lot of music this decade. There was a lot of shit, and I definitely used to be one of those “wow no one makes good music anymore” morons, but I grew out of that and learned to look in the right places.

Let’s start with the albums I loved the most. Continuing her meteoric rise from the 2000s, Lady Gaga drooped her magnum opus, Born This Way, an album that successfully showcases her skills as she takes on numerous pop styles. No two songs sound the same, and with a couple of exceptions every song slaps. While we’re on the subject of pop stars, Gaga’s contemporary and lesser Katy Perry managed to hit a home run with the fun bit of pop fluff that was Teenage Dream.

Weird Al was sorely missed for most of the decade, but what albums he did drop featured some of his best work. While Alpocalypse doesn’t hold up quite so well, it’s still solid, but even then it is blown out of the water by Mandatory Fun, an album that just refuses to stop being funny from start to finish. And that’s not the only funny albums this decade; aside from artists I’ll get more into later, George Miller AKA Filthy Frank released Pink Season as one of his last great acts as his character of Pink Guy. The album is as raunchy and filthy as you’d expect. And then for unintentional comedy, Corey Feldman dropped Angelic 2 The Core, an album so musically inept that it ends up becoming endearing; it’s The Room of music.

As I gamed a lot this decade I got to experience a lot of great video game soundtracks, but the two I found to be the absolute best were Undertale and Metal Gear Rising’s. I couldn’t tell you which soundtrack is better, and I’ve actually made a playlist on my iPod containing my favorite tracks from both games. Pokemon had solid soundtracks all decade, but they definitely were better in single tracks such as Ultra Necrozma’s theme from USUM and Zinnia’s theme from ORAS.

And speaking of individual songs, there were a lot I really loved. The disco revival in the easel ide half of the decade lead to gems like “Get Lucky,” “Uptown Funk,” and… uh, “Blurred Lines.” The controversy to that one might be overblown, but it sure isn’t anything I really want to revisit.

Corey Feldman may be the king of unintentional comedy, but this decade was seriously ripe with so bad it’s good music. The crown jewel is without a doubt the giddy, goofy “Friday,” but I think the equally stupid but also endlessly more relatable Ark Music production “Chinese Food” is worth some ironic enjoyment as well. 

Meme songs in general were pretty enjoyable, though it came at a price. Remember when everyone tried to be funny by ripping off “Gangnam Style?” Remember when people took that Ylvis song at face value? Irony and satire were lost on the masses. I think the best mene song of the decade, though, is “Crab Rave,” a bouncy instrumental dance track with a fun music video and an absurd yet hilarious meme tacked to it. And then we have “The Internet is for Music,” a gargantuan 30 minute mashup featuring every YTMND, 4chan, Newgrounds, and YouTube meme you could think of (at the time of its release anyway),

Then we get into artists. Comedy music was great this decade, with Steel Panther and The Lonely Island putting out great work all decade, but by far my favorite funny band is Ninja Sex Party. Dan “Danny Sexbang” Avidan and Brian “Ninja Brian” Wecht are pretty much my favorite entertainers at this point, with them easily being able to go from doing goofy yet epic songs where they fuck or party to doing serious and awesome cover albums where Dan flexes his impressive vocals. A big plus is how all of their albums are easily some of my favorites ever, with not a single bad CD, and that’s not even getting into their side project Starbomb. These guys are a treasure.

Then we have Ghost, a Swedish metal band who play up the Satanic panic for all it’s worth. These guys captured my interest when I heard the beautiful “Cirice” on the radio, and despite that song rocking the fuck out, Imagine my surprise when it ended up being only middle of the road awesome for this band! With killer original songs like “Rats,” “Mary in the Cross,” and “Square Hammer” to a awesome covers like “Missionary Man” and “I’m a Marionette,” it’s almost enough to get a guy to hail Satan. I think they appeal to me mainly because they have a style very in line with the 80s, most evident on tracks like “Rats.” 

While I’d hesitate to call him one of my favorite musicians yet (he is really good so far though), one of my favorite people in entertainment is Lil Nas X. From his short but sweet songs that crush genre boundaries to his hilarious Twitter feed, this guy is going places and I can’t wait to see what those places are.

And finally, the guy I think may be one of the greatest creative geniuses alive and who has nearly singlehandedly shaped Internet culture with everything he does… Neil Cicierega. While it’s not like I only discovered him in the 2010s - the guy has been an omnipresent force in my life since Potter Pupper Pals debuted - he definitely became the guy I would unflinchingly call the greatest artist of our time over that period.   Whether he’s releasing the songs under his own name or as Lemon Demon, you can always be sure that the songs are going to burrow into your brain. His Lemon Demon album Spirit Phone, which features songs about urban legends and the horrors of capitalism, is easily my pick for album of the decade. And then under his own name he released three mashup mixtapes: Mouth Sounds, Mouth Silence, and Mouth Moods. All three are stellar albums, but only Mouth Moods has “Wow Wow,” the bouncing track about homoerotic bee-loving Will Smith and outtakes so good they deserve to be on the next album.

Video Games 

Having a PC this decade was great because it let me experience a lot of games I probably wouldn’t have otherwise, like Half-Life, BioShock, Earthnound, Mother 3, and Final Fantasy VI and VII. All of these and more are among my favorite games of all time now, but we’re here to talk about the stuff from this decade I consider great.

It’s hard to talk about this decade in gaming without mentioning Skyrim. Yes, it has flaws and the main storyline is a bit undercooked, but there’s so much fun to be had dicking about in the wilderness it’s hard to be too mad. And if you have mods, there are endless opportunities to expand the game. The same is true for the other game I have sunk countless hours into, The Binding of Isaac: Rebirth. Not only is there a thriving modding community, but it has been supported and encouraged by the creators and some mods have even made the leap into becoming fully canon! It’s always a blast to revisit and see how far I can break the game with item combos.

Surprisingly, Batman managed to get not one, not two, but THREE awesome licensed games this decade! Arkham Asylum, Arkham City, and the unfairly maligned Arkham Origins all kick as much ass as the Dark Knight himself. The former two reunite Mark Hamill and Kevin McConroy as Joker and Batman while the latter features numerous stellar boss battles. The combat in these games is so graceful and fluid, you WILL feel like Batman at some point, be it after flawlessly clobbering two dozen mooks or silently eliminating a room of thugs before they even realize you’re there.

Pokémon had a bit of a rocky decade; it started out strong with the fifth generation, the best games in the series with a great story, region, and sidequests and then just went downhill from there. Not incredibly so, of course - the games were always fun at least - but gens VI through VIII were not the most graceful steps into 3D. Still, every gen managed to produce some of my all-time favorite Pokémon. Gen V had Volcarona, Chandelure,  and Meloetta; Gen VI gave us Hoopa, Klefki, the Fairy type in general, and a gorgeous mega evolution for my favorite Pokémon, Absol; Gen VII had the Ultra Beasts and Ultra Necrozma, some of the coolest concepts in the series, as well as Pyukumuku; and Gen VIII gave us Cinderace, Dracovish, Dracozolt, Polteageist, Hatterene, Snom, and Zacian. And those are just samplings mind you, these gens are full of hits.

Bringing back old franchises yielded amazing results. Look no further than the triumphant return of Doom in 2016, which had you ripping and tearing through the forces of Hell with guns, chainsaws, and your bear fucking hands. This game is HARDCORE. Less bloody and gory but no less awesome was the return of not just Crash Bandicoot, but Spyro as well in remakes that are easily the definitive ways to experience the games. And don’t even get me started on the remastered DuckTales!

Platinum games did not fuck around this decade, delivering Bayonetta 2 and Metal Gear Rising. The former is a balls-to-the-wall sequel to the amazing original Bayonetta that, while lacking in bosses quite as impressive as the first game’s, is more polished and has a fun story and a better haircut for Bayonetta; the latter is an action game so insane it makes the rest of the Metal Gear franchise look tame in comparison. The latter in particular is in my top ten games ever, with every boss battle feeling epic, all the music kicking ass, and Raiden truly coming into his own as a badass.

Speaking of Metal Gear, the divisive The Phantom Pain easily earns its place here. While much fuss has been made about the game being “unfinished,” it still has a complete and satisfying ending even if it doesn’t totally wrap up the dangling plot threads the young Liquid Snake leaves behind. The overarching themes as well as Venom and his relationship with characters like Kaz, Paz, and ESPECIALLY Quiet make this game, with his and Quiet’s being particularly beautiful and tragic. The Paz quest, Quiet’s exit, and the mission where Snake has to put down his men after they get infested with parasites are all some of the most heartbreaking moments in the franchise. But it’s not all tears; there’s plenty of fun to be had harassing Russians in Afghanistan while blaring 80s synth pop from your Walkman. Oh yeah, and fuck Huey.

The Ace Attorney series also thrived, with both Spirit of Justice and Dual Destinies transitioning the series into 3D a lot more graceful than some other franchises while still maintaining the with and charm the series is known for. And if that wasn’t enough for my point-and-cluck adventure needs, Telltale had me covered with The Wolf Among Us and the first season of The Walking Dead. The stories and characters of those games are so good, it’s enough to make you sad they never got a timely sequel or sequels that weren’t shit respectively.

This decade is when I really got into fighting game, though I’m not particularly good. I supported Skullgirls (and am even in the credits!), and got into Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 and JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: All-Star Battle (and I also got into its spiritual predecessor, Heritage for the Future). But by and large my favorite fighting game of the decade and the one I’m actually pretty good at is Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, the most ridiculously ambitious crossover in video game history. The fact that the game is STILL getting more characters added is a testament of how insanely great the game is because instead of being mad that there’s so much DLC, people are going rabid waiting for news of more. It’s such an awesome, complete game out the door that the DLC feels earned rather than half a game being held hostage. Other devs, take note!

A lot of franchises put their best foot forward for sequels. God of War III was an awesomely bloody finale to the original journey of Kratos, with more epic bosses than ever; now he’s off fighting Norse gods, and I hear that game is even better! Portal 2 is just an absolute blast, and easily surpasses the first game on the merit of having Cave Johnson alone; the fact we get Wheatley and the malfunctioning personality cores honestly feels like overkill. Then we have BioShock… 2. While it’s certainly not as good as the first game, I think it was a lot of fun, and it got way too much flak.

 I think it definitely aged better than Infinite which, while still a good game in its own right (it’s hard to hate a game with a character as endearing as Elizabeth), definitely was not warranting the levels of acclaim it got with such a muddled narrative. “Overrated” and “overhyped” are not words I keep in my vocabulary and I certainly would not describe Infinite as such, but I do feel like people got swept up in the gorgeous visuals and the story bits and characters that are effective and so weren’t nearly as critical of its flaws. It’s still a good, fun game with an interesting world, but it pales in comparison to the other two BioShocks. I feel like The Last of Us is in a similar boat. That being said, I couldn’t tell you why; it has a great story, good characters, plenty of replayability, and fascinating enemy design. But despite all that, I appreciate this game more than love it. It’s the Citizen Kane of video game sin that regard at least.

I’d be remiss to not mention the big indie successes of the decade. Shovel Knight is easily one is the greatest platform era ever made, taking everything great about the platformers on the NES and SNES, removing the bullshit, and delivering numerous bonus campaigns with unique playstyles. Then there was Abobo’s Big Adventure, a marvelous mashup of all sorts of games starring the beloved Double Dragon mook as he goes on a bloody quest to save his son. It’s a blast and there is tons of variety but some sections are definitely as hair-pullingly difficult as the games that inspired them. And then there is Doki Doki Literature Club, the free visual novel that brutally subverts your expectations. Sadly, I do feel the game loses some impact on subsequent playthroughs, but it’s still a great, effective story that skillfully utilizes meta elements.

Still, the greatest indie success of them all is Toby Fox’s masterpiece, Undertale. Charming, funny, emotional, and populated by a cast of some of the most fun and lovable characters ever conceived, this game was an instant smash and is still talked about to this day. Sure, things like Sans have been memed to death, but it’s hard to not just love and cherish the beautiful world Toby Fox managed to create. This game may not be the greatest game of all time, but for what it is I wouldn’t hesitate to name it the game of the decade.

There was a lot of great art in the 2010s, and while I couldn’t get around to all of it, I’m so happy with what I got to experience. Here’s hoping that the 2020s can be just as amazing!

[chibipika]

Oh my god, I’m digging through old files on my backup harddrive and I found this dream from 2011 in which me, @antialiasis, and a baby dragon are on the run from The King of Everything.  It is absolutely batshit and I love it:

Okay, so for some reason I was hanging out with Dragonfree.  What the hell, subconscious?  Why do you always stick my online acquaintances into my dreams?  (I think it’s a side effect of that time in my life where all I had were online friends and the fanfic forum was pretty much my entire life, even though that was like 6 years ago.)  But at least this time it sort of makes sense—I’ve been working on an off on the Ouen dragons piece a lot lately, adding little touches here and there when I’m bored, so people often ask me what it is, so I frequently launch into explanations of, “Oh hey there’s this writer with a cool fanfic, and I’m doing fanart of it.”  “Hey what’s it about?”  “Well, it’s kind of hard to explain the plot because it’s basically an awesome reworking of silly ideas from when she was 12.” “ROFL THAT SOUNDS LIKE YOU.” “Erm….yeah.  -_-“

Okay then, random tangent aside I was hanging out with Dragonfree I guess.  No explanation given.  At least my dream self wanted an explanation, though never actually got one.  I was at my home house instead of my school house which makes slightly more sense (If I were European I’d sooner visit the US East coast/NY area than the friggin Midwest.)

Kay, I swear the plot was awesomely detailed and amazing but now it is starting to sound really silly and I’m not sure why I’m writing it down. Dangit.  It started out like...pretty mediocre at my house (or what was supposed to be my house but looked nothing like it, what.)  I think there was some subplot involving something going wrong with her website (some of the layouts weren’t working which was apparently a sign of someone currently stealing things from it?  What??? Also one of the styles was really cool and best described as a matrix Articuno.  YES.)  I dunno. And then there was a hilarious part where my sister walked though the kitchen into the computer room and said something like “When did Beth get here?”  And I’m like “Wtf, that’s not Beth.”  But then I walked into the room and it was. (So now Beth was somehow at my house too?  How did all these people get here?)  Dragonfree was in fact back in the kitchen on the computer that was for some reason there (no, not my laptop…a random desktop in the kitchen), and Beth did not appear for the entire rest of the dream. *shrug*  Though amusingly at this point I wondered, “Hey since this isn’t the internet, should I call you Dragonfree or by your real name?”  but never actually asked it.  So I went the whole dream without addressing her by any name (not as weird as it sounds—I don’t use people’s names often.)

But all of this random crap quickly derailed into something involving DRAGONS HOLY CRAP.  Okay, so I actually can’t remember how the dragons plotline started dang.  I think there were like, different types of dragons (one for each element?  This was completely unrelated to Pokémon, however. In fact, I don’t think anything Pokémon ever came up, other than that random bit about her site.  I don’t have Pokémon dreams often.  What the hell, subconscious.)  I think we had the earth dragon or something except I guess it was a baby.  And then like, the queen of the world ordered the dragons (she had a lot of them I think) to kill people, except each dragon’s power was only effective on certain people, and the Earth dragon was supposed to kill us.  I think I ran and hid in a bush (yeah…because that would save me from the elemental dragon…) but since the Earth dragon was just a baby its power didn’t kill us (and I was confused about why the other dragons’ attacks didn’t hurt because I didn’t know about the whole only-effective-on-certain-people thing).  So then I emerged from my hiding place and I think a lot of time had gone by because I saw the events in a slow, limited-animation cutscene type thing (hey…sorta like that game concept art my group’s been planning.)  Well the earth dragon was now an adult.  I met up with Dragonfree at some sort of dessert table where a servant was putting together sweets for the king.  Things like chocolate covered pretzels and bananas. I guess I felt like trolling the king or something, so I stole one of the chocolate bananas, and then we ended up having the guards sent after us (yeah, way to go dream self.)  We hopped on a train (like an old style steam engine) except it was rather small, and intended for little kids.  Well lo and behold my youngest sister was there.  We rode on the train for a bit until my sister climbed on top to check something and was doing it all very not-carefully like someone who has totally climbed on top of a train and started opening hatches a hundred times in their life.  Well something went wrong and then she fell off and got tangled in some vines and then the train tried to go through an insanely small tunnel and started shrinking, so we had to get off.  And then we found the earth dragon!  Except he was a baby again OKAY THEN.

(Thus far there hasn’t been much dialogue only because I can’t remember it.  Everyone was actually talking a lot more than this implies. They weren’t all just standing there.) Also I think I spent most of the dream wondering when Dragonfree was going to go back home.  Because “oh yeah we’re on adventure and running for our lives, but hey please don’t leave in the middle of all this I wanna hang out some more.” Uh huh.  This makes even less sense when you consider that there are no countries and the king of everything is after us.

Well this time the queen was there with the guards so we ran away into this sort of maze of stairs vaguely like a kids’ play area except kind of more serious business.  Some of the stairs were in fact escalators that were broken down, and others were so small that we had to slide down then and we were doing pretty good at avoiding the guards.  We all regrouped and figured out a way onto the third floor, at which point we were feeling pretty clever, but then WE RAN INTO THE QUEEN OH SNAP.  But she was actually on our side the whole time! I think this made more sense in the dream (maybe she knew the earth dragon wouldn’t kill us with its attack? But what about all the people killed by the king’s fire dragon?)  Well she did something to the stair area to prevent the guards from getting through while she made a deal with us.  So then we had the queen with us, yay?

We were now heading up a mountain!  I have no idea what we were looking for at the top.  Except first we had to go though some sort of summer-camp type area, where they made us go though inspection (okay?)  This involved pushing us under streams of water which I thought were going to be freezing but were actually kind of warm.  Kay then.  During the next part we were all in a building (at the camp I guess) and a bunch of the campers were watching tv. At this point I thought to myself “Hey it’s weird how this dream is still continuing even though I’m awake.” WHAT?  So I thought this part was real, but I was still dreaming it…even though it was real?  Now, there have been times I’ve been able to continue a dream while awake and have it actually fit in the dream, as opposed to the lame crap you usually try to add to a dream shortly after awakening until you realize “wait my logic works now and this is stupid.”  But anyways…I think around this point was I finally going to ask Dragonfree, “Hey we’ve been running all over a crazy kingdom all day and I’m still not sure what to call you since this isn’t the internet and all.”  But at that point I woke up.  Well…damn.  I mean, it’s better than when you have a dream end at a super-suspenseful point (since we were kind of just wasting time at a camp and I don’t even think the earth dragon was with us anymore).  But still I felt the need to go run and grab my laptop and start writing all this down and highly confusing my roommates in the process.

And holy crap LOOK HOW MUCH I WROTE IN HALF AN HOUR.  Why can’t I write my fic this fast?