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#Ive said it OVER AND OVER since back in 2018-19
rainbowsans · 2 years
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ur valid to dislike what u dislike but lumping selfcest in w like... incest and underaged content is just kinda insulting to anybody who has been thru those things. couldn't imagine being an incest survivor and getting told ur selfcest ship (harmless, cannot be replicated irl in any way, is not incest) is equally as bad as, ykno, an irl traumatic experience u had. like if u think selfcest is problematic enough to be put in the same category as incest and the sexual exploitation of children, u need to consider how u express that and also maybe log off of tumblr for a while. say it makes u uncomfy n u avoid it, super fair, but the way u treat it is downright insulting to ppl who have gone thru actual real tangible trauma. selfcest isn't real- I can tell u have a stance on it by ur language but maybe reconsider, there's a reason the stance is unpopular
I was sexually assaulted when I was in elementary, I was molested by my cousins, twice. groped by my own uncles, when I was a CHILD.
insulting to people who’d gone through those things?
IVE BEEN THROUGH THOSE THINGS. HOW FUCKING DARE YOU.
also, also; here’s the thing.
that rule I have with Selfcest? is for MY personal boundary. I don’t LIKE it, I want people to be aware when they ask ME or come to ME that I prefer to stay away from it. people don’t read my rules so I have to remind them in the “nicest” way possible.
I’m not “insulting” anyone by having that rule, it makes me uncomfortable so I want to avoid it the best I can and I want people to be aware of it, in case they think about wanting to send me stuff involving it:
If people are “insulted” with me gently reminding people when I GET ASKED that “hey, I don’t like this thing so please remember that I won’t draw or do anything with it!” then that’s THEIR problem, not mine.
I am setting my damn boundaries and I won’t be told, again, that I’m the one that’s being MEAN or INSULTING for it.
This is my blog, my art, and I get to set down my rules and boundaries, that’s all.
I put it next to those things because it’s so normalized in the fandom, and whatever, I just want others to know that if they are expecting that stuff in my blog? it’s not there, nor is it welcomed. Period.
and guess what? IVE SAID COUNTLESS TIMES THAT I AM UNCOMFORTABLE WITH IT AND AVOUD IT, BLACKLIST IT, and guess what? I STILL have people keep pressuring and demanding that shit to the point where I see it constantly in my inbox.
I HAVE TO GUIDE THEM TO MY RULES, I’m not going to be a damn pushover, I’m not gonna feel like my rules are “mean”, they are there for ME to set boundaries and have a comfortable experience here or ANYONE who feels the same way.
GOD.
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hoohoobeanie · 5 months
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Might be a can of worms, but I do think since the mythical era shourtney have definitely been mindful to play themselves and their relationship (whatever you think it is) down. Probs to highlight new cast/new relationships which they are so right for! It makes me bummed sometimes tho because they ARE so amazing together!! the 1, 2, switch video with them and ianthony is so funny and both of them are so silly and giggly, especially court!! And they show time and time again that they are real friends who spend a significant amount of time together outside of work and I don’t think you’d pick up on that if you were just a causal viewer.
All this to say, I don’t envy either of them !! Definitely the two members of the cast who have most felt the brunt of shippers ire and learned their lessons. But I’ll always love them as a duo 💞💞 mother (Shayne) and father (Courtney) of modern smosh if u ask me
i have big opinions about shourtney so probably this will be quite long
i agree that the shourtney content has definitely toned down since circa 2021 onwards? now if this has to do with their own personal relationship or to do with focusing on other cast too, im not sure.
however, i do believe that IF they are together irl (i dont want to state that they are for sure, bcos as much "evidence" as ive seen, i dont want to say theyre together until they confirm it themselves) anyway, if they ARE together, the decline of shourt being milked for content would make sense. they've both said theyre private people, and they likely wouldn't want their actual personal relationship to be used as content 24/7
now as for my personal opinions on shourt, i will say again that if they weren't so actively forced down our throats in 2018/19/20, they would a much more tolerable ship. so many fans, casual viewers or not, were overly shippy and downright invasive with them.
i used to be a bit more against the ship, because i saw it as kind of boring and just like "oh lets stick the two blonde conventionally attractive white man and woman together" and in 2019 when i got into the fandom, almost every comment, video and thumbnail was prominently shourt based.
as time has gone on and the ship has been put on a back burner in content, ive actually grown to enjoy it. you can really see how much they care for each other, romantically or not, and they truly have been there for each other for so many years now.
tldr: nowadays, to me Shourt is an A class dynamic, ruined by an abundance of comments over them and smosh themselves milking their dynamic for content
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garne--tt · 3 years
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x japan iceberg explained;
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before i start, i probably didnt explain something right and if u want to correct me or add something, feel free and even dm me about it! + i will add trigger warnings for possible triggering content in this post
1.
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formed in 1982 - x was formed in 1982 after toshis and yoshikis previous band disbanded
X --> X JAPAN - they changed their name from X to X JAPAN in 1992 in order to distinguish themselves from the american punk rock band X 
Saw IV - a horror movie from 2007, x japan did a theme song I.V. for the movie, it was their first song released since 1998
new album - an new x japan album that was supposed to be released lots of times over the 10+years but still (to this day) wasnt released
coachella 2018 - x japan performed at coachella 2018, many fans are saying how the sound was bad (usually blaming it on the sound production team?? or whatever its called) and apparently sugizo and yoshiki were seen arguing with the sound production team
we are x - a 2016 documentary about x japan (or rather yoshiki, because apparently it was mainly focusing on him)
psychidelic violence crime of visual shock - a slogan, mainly seen on the blue blood album cover, the term visual kei was derived from the slogan yoshiki, toshi, hide, pata, taiji - the most known lineup, from 1987 to 1992
2. tw// suicide mention
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violet uk - one of unfinished yoshikis projects, started in 2002, didnt even debut but was supposed to in 2012
V2 - unit of yoshiki and tetsuya komuro, was active in 1992, they released one single and did one concert
ra:in - patas band, active since 2002, members are - pata, michiaki, die (also former member of spread beaver), ryu
noise/dynamite - toshis and yoshikis first band, formed in 1977 as dynamite, then they changed the name to noise, noise disbanded in 1982
s.k.i.n. - superband (group) of yoshiki, gackt, miyavi and sugizo, their only activity was in 2007 and it was live, they announced more activities but they were stopped
xfreaks - an international xjapan fan forum created in 2006
dope headz - band that had heath and pata as members, active from 2000 to 2003
hide with spread beaver - hides live band, other members were kiyoshi, k.a.z, hiroshi watanabe, satoshi miyawaki, d.i.e, i.n.a
zilch - supergroup formed by hide in 1996, other members were ray mcveigh,paul raven, joey castillo and i.n.a
lynx - one of heaths band, active from 2004-?, the vocalist for this band was issay from der zibet
yokosuka saver tiger - hides former band, he was member from 1981 to 1986 sugizo - luna sea guitarist, he joined x japan in 2008
hides death - hide committed suicide in 1998 (he hanged himself) update: this is what authorities said and what is official
3. tw// suicide
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taijis death - in 2011 taiji was flying from japan to saipan, on the flight he got into fight with his manager (or flight attendant?), he was arrested after they landed in saipan and then he hanged himself with bedsheet in his cell
x japan translations - an site that had xjapan translations (like toshis book etc...), the site was active and up until 2018
taijis departure from X - taiji left X in 1992, but we dont know the exact reason why he left
toshi was in cult - toshi was member of cult known as home of heart from the late 90s (1998?)
1997 - the year x japan disbanded
yoshiki and queen elizabeth incident - in 2019 during royal windsor cup yoshikis scarf accidentally landed on queen elizabeth
yoshiki knows everyone - (not everyone ofc) but he met a lot of celebrities, politicians (barrack obama, johnny depp, prince phillip, bts etc,,)
art of life - a 29 minute song released released in 1993, it was was recorded only in english, the theme of the song are yoshikis suicidal tendencies, art of life was meant to be released in the jealousy album (1991)
yoshikis father - yoshikis father committed suicide when yoshiki was 10 years old
taijis cut off joint on finger - taiji when he was kid, showed his hand into a factory machine (his family owned factory) and cut off his first joint on his finger
yoshikis health problems - yoshiki has tons of health problem since he was child (asthma, he was always sick and spent most of the time in hospitals etc,,) and suffers from many of health problems even now
4.
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toshis healing music - toshis music he made during the home of heart era
kaori moritani & masaya - kaori moritani is toshis ex wife, they met in around 1993 when they played in rock opera hamlet, they got married in 1997 and divorced in 2010, she introduced him to masaya (and got him, or rather manipulated him, into home of heart) 
masaya -  real name tōru kurabuchi - musician and leader of home of heart
-more about home of heart and the whole situation here: https://bloodydesertrose.tumblr.com/post/96662764536/support-toshi-dont-buy-or-listen-to-any-of-his-songs
debut in usa - x japan was supposed to debut in usa in the 90s (and even changed their name because of it, x-->xjapan)
extasy record - label formed by yoshiki in 1986, the first release under extasy records was x orgasm ep, the label had bands like xjapan, luna sea, glay, zi:kill tokyo yankees and more
yoshiki paid for taijis new teeth - after hides funeral yoshiki noticed that taijis some teeth were missing or chipped, so he handed him around 2 million yen (around 18 497 usd) to get his teeth fixed
l.o.x. - punk rock supergroup, yoshiki was drummer in this band, they also used to be named masami & l.o.x (masami was their vocalist), masami collapsed and fell into coma in 1989 and died in 1992 due to pneumonia in coma, l.o.x released one album with different vocalist (one of them which was toshi and yoshiki went by the alias shiratori rei here on the album) in 1990, l.o.x. released one song in 2002 in memory of masami
standing sex promotional shot & single cover - the promotional shot & single cover basically shows yoshiki nude (with his intimate parts covered of course + this wasnt the only time yoshiki has done something like this) 
rose & blood -indies of x- - an unofficial album with demos and unreleased x songs
unreleased & old songs - there are a lot unreleased songs + unreleased old songs or just old songs that dont get played anymore
5.
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rosenfeld - crows in black - blue blood has similar guitar riff (i dont know how to say it) to this song (crows in black / b was firstly recorded on demo in 1986)
former members - x japan has big amount of former members - 11 former members (excluding taiji and hide from this)
terry - a former member of x, he was one of the original members (being a member from 1982 to 1985), terry died in 2002 in car accident
yoshiki got sued by hides brother - yoshiki got sued by headwax (hides company which hides brother owns) for using hides photos, apparently they had a contract but it expired and yoshiki still used hides photos even though the contract expired
x japan condoms - they were released in 1993 with the intent to help increase awareness and prevent the spread of AIDS. the reason why they probably did this is that toshis fan died at the age of 19 due to AIDS (toshi even dedicated a song to him - passion of love and became a active member and sponsor of association of struggle against AIDS)
heath cow story - when heath joined xjapan they celebrated it by drinking and then driving 2 hours to cow farm, then they drove to aquarium but it was already closed
heath leaving x japan - in 2009 there was a rumor that heath would leave x japan, apparently this was caused due to heaths contract problems (?) dementia - taijis former band, he was member from 1984 to 1985 and went under the name ray
pata was roadie for x - before joining x in 1987, he was roadie for x (or the member hally) around the time in 1986 (1985?)
6.
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pink spider was a suicide note - this one is a rumor/theory that is circulating around, fans analysed the lyrics and came to conclusion that its suicide note
x stayed at different hotels than other bands - when x was on tour with other bands they were staying at different hotels than other bands, because one time (on tour with other bands and in hotel) hide got into drunk fight with juichi morishige (lead vocalist of ziggy) and sprayed the entire hotel lounge with fire extinguisher
taiji was homeless - taiji was homeless for around 2 years (1996-1998), due to financial issues + he got divorced at this time
heaths myspace account - there was heath myspace account, but it wasnt him, it was someone pretending to be him
weekend pv theory - (i dont know if i should have put this here to be honest) a theory that x members chose what their death would be in weekend pv (yoshiki - suicide, hide - suicide in drunken rage??, taiji - murder, pata - alcohol poisoning, toshi doesnt die in the pv)
7.
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hide vocaloid - hides unreleased song co gal got finished via vocaloid (using his voice samples from various songs of his)
yoshiki lead singer - before toshi was chosen to be the lead vocalist for x, yoshiki was the vocalist (there is also a recording of stab me in the back with mostly yoshiki on vocals!)
hide and marilyn manson meet up story - im gonna just attach a screenshot of the story
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taiji was murdered - taiji committed suicide in 2011 in his cell on saipan, but there are some things that point to the possibility that he was murdered (his manager insisted on cremating his body and got cremated without autopsy, money got transfered on his account, information missing from the internet?? etc,,) 
juns tape - demo tape recorded in 1986 by at the time X guitarist jun, tape contains instrumental recordings of unreleased songs right now, only way, tune up and one unnamed song.
ill kill you single cover - cover of 1985 X single ill kill you, it contains photos of victims of the vietnam war
feel me tonight - demo tape from 1985/1986, it contains songs feel me tonight and stab me in the back (all of them are under one minute here) sung by their at the time guitarist hally (apparently there aslo should be yoshiki version of it, but i dont know how much we can trust metal archives)
8. tw// eating disorder mention
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yoshiki hired someone to kill taiji - this one is a rumor!!!, yoshiki was supposed to get/hire yakuza to kill taiji hide had an eating disorder - this one is unconfirmed!!! hide  suffered from bulimia (yoshiki walked on him purging - and this story was also apparently told by yoshiki???)
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gdwessel · 2 years
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World Tag League 2021 & Best Of The Super Juniors 28 Night 23 - 12/15/2021: Winners of Two Tournaments Revealed; Katsuyori Shibata Announces Match At WK16 Night 1; Ospreay Becomes Warrior Wrestling Champion
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The tour-ending Finals for both World Tag League 2021 and Best Of The Super Juniors 28 took place today at Tokyo Ryogoku Kokugikan, and you can see it now on NJPWWorld. Quite a lot of setup for what is to come at Wrestle Kingdom 16 happened here, as we head into the final four shows of 2021 starting next week...
- 12/15/2021, Tokyo Ryogoku Kokugikan
Minoru Suzuki [SZKG], TAKA Michinoku [JTO] & DOUKI [SZKG] d. Ryusuke Taguchi, Yuto Nakashima & Kosei Fujita (DOUKI > Fujita, Italian Stretch No.32, 6:07)
Taiji Ishimori & El Phantasmo [Bullet Club] d. Tiger Mask IV & Ryohei Oiwa (Ishimori > OIwa, Sudden Death [ELP], 2:31)
Taichi, Zack Sabre Jr., El Desperado & Yoshinobu Kanemaru [SZKG] d. Toru Yano [CHAOS], Togi Makabe, Tomoaki Honma & Master Wato (Sabre > Honma, Referee Stoppage, 9:16)
Hiroshi Tanahashi, Hiroyoshi Tenzan, Satoshi Kojima & Yuji Nagata d. Tama Tonga, Tanga Loa, Bad Luck Fale & Chase Owens [Bullet Club] (Tanahashi > Owens, Samson Clutch, 9:25)
Tetsuya Naito & SANADA [Los Ingobernables] d. Great O-Khan & Jeff Cobb [United Empire] (Naito > Cobb, Hurricanrana, 9:30)
Kazuchika Okada & Robbie Eagles [CHAOS] d. Shingo Takagi & BUSHI [Los Ingobernables] (Okada > BUSHI, Rainmaker, 11:32)
World Tag League 2021 Final: Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI [CHAOS] d. EVIL & Yujiro Takahashi [Bullet Club] (YOSHI-HASHI > Yujiro, Naraku, 19:58) - Goto/YOSHI-HASHI win World Tag League 2021
Best Of The Super Juniors 28 Final: Hiromu Takahashi [Los Ingobernables] d. YOH [CHAOS] (Timebomb II, 38:30) - Hiromu Takahashi wins Best Of The Super Juniors 28
Hiromu Takahashi wins his third consecutive Best Of The Super Juniors, having won last year and in 2018, but was out of 2019's tournament due to his heinous neck injury. This was the longest-ever BOSJ match in the history of the tournament. And really, it's the right call. Hiromu has proven he can headline shows, and be a semi-main-eventer in the Tokyo Dome already. The history and feud between Hiromu and El Desperado adds to the aura of what will surely be the IWGP Juniorheavyweight title match at WK16. YOH, for his part, did himself credit, going through his redemption saga and even getting one over on SHO during the tournament. We'll see when their rubber match comes about. Hirooki Goto wins his 3rd World Tag League crown, whilst YOSHI-HASHI gets his first. All credit to YOSHI-HASHI -- he was never a third wheel on his/Goto/Ishii's NEVER 6-Man reign for the last year, and has finally found a good niche for himself in the company after underachieving for so long compared to others of his Young Lion class (particularly Kazuchika Okada). It's good to see people who work hard succeed even if it takes a long time to do so. Goto/YOSHI-HASHI v. Dangerous Tekkers will be coming soon enough now too. Despite a really down year for NJPW, the Heavyweight tag division has actually fun and interesting to watch in 2021. KENTA appeared via video message to challenge Hiroshi Tanahashi to a No-DQ match for the IWGP US Heavyweight title at WK16, which, OK, sure, sounds fun. KENTA's partner once upon a time, Katsuyori Shibata, appeared in the ring, choking back tears, proclaiming simply that he will have a match on January 4, 2022, and that was all. No details on whom his opponent would be or where on the card this match will take place. It will not be an exhibition match like his 5-minute grappling encounter with Zack Sabre Jr. at the G1 Climax 31 Final. I've said my piece about what I feel about the idea of Shibata returning to wrestling numerous times since April 2017, I'm not going to repeat it here. I just hope he knows what he's doing and he doesn't further damage himself in the process. He's 42 years old at this stage, which by itself isn't exactly a prohibitive factor anymore, but he's not a young man either. Poor Ryohei Oiwa got squashed in under three minutes. We now have a potential three-way challenge for the junior tag titles, between champions Flying Tiger (Tiger Mask IV & Robbie Eagles), Ishimori/ELP and now Taguchi/Master Wato. Be still my beating heart. Will Ospreay has another title belt in his possession, this time whilst actually being champion. (OK he is still RevPro champion as well...) On Sunday in Tinley Park, IL, Ospreay won the Warrior Wrestling championship, in a 3-way match between himself, then-champion Trey Miguel, and Blake Christian. Ospreay proclaimed he will have the title with him at Night 2 of WK16 on 1/5/2022, and is being advertised for Warrior's show in South Bend, IN, on 1/22/2022, against an opponent to be determined. We'll see how long this lasts I guess. You can see Sunday’s show on FITE TV for a fee. The next show is on 12/21/2021, the first night of four for the Road To Tokyo Dome year-end tour. No lineups have been announced yet. Six days' break is the longest gap between shows that we've had in months. Maybe I need a vacation?
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unknownkhhgirls · 4 years
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UNKNOWN FEMALE KHH KRNB ARTISTS THAT DESERVE BETTER: 2020 EDITION
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DOYILEE
- she's an independent artist - she was born and raised in Saipan, March 3rd 1994 - she attended college in Iowa and then moved to Chicago - she moved in Korea in July 2019 - her brother is in the military - although she's very fluent in english, her parents used to speak korean around the household so she ended up being fluent in both languages - she studied Studio Art in College out boredom and lack of choices while picking a major - her fav color is pink - she used sing in middle school, she also joined a choir in College so she got introduced to music since she was very young - she has a youtube channel where she posts vlogs and song/rap covers - after he "face tattoo" vlog blew up, people started asking for the music in the background and so she decided to take her own music seriously and become a professional - her muses/role models are Dean and Jvcki wai - she's a very meditative/reflective person, she also mentioned "thinking" as her hobby - she dislikes pickled food such as pickled radish or cucumber - she mentioned self improvement as her permanent goal - she mentioned working different part time jobs while living in Chicago such as nail salon receptionist, customer service representative and a graphic designer assistant
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JCLEF
- she was born in January 10, 1993 - she studied Chemical and Biomolecular Technology at Sogang University - before studying at Sogang University she failed three times to get into a Music based college. - before fame she was tutoring and was a Maths and Science teacher part time for a living while living in an underground studio - she wasn't necessarily good at school in other subjects, but always wanted to be great in Maths and Science - despite her passion for singing and music her parents were opposed to her becoming a musician - likes to watch netflix, reading books and play games on her free time - she realized she wanted to make music while preparing for a performance with her music club in college, she didn't want it to be a one time experience - she debuted with her first Mixtape "Canyon" released in February 22, 2016 - she composes and writes lyrics in all her tracks - her first album is "[flaw,flaw]" released in  August 14, 2018 - her musical genre is mainly R&B - she would like to try jazz or groovy music genre next - she joined and was announced as a new artist of CraftandJun in March 19, 2019 - she's part of Biscuit Haus Crew - she's a big fan of Choi LB, in fact, the song Dive In Island is supposed to be a remix of Choi LB's song with the same title - she featured on Choi LB's album and also participated in arranging the songs from his album [오리엔테이션] - in 2019 she was nominated for Rookie of the Year, Best R&B and Soul Album, Best R&B and Soul Song at the Korean Music Award and won the Best R&B and Soul Album Award - her first album [fla,flaw] received excellent reviews from Music critics ending with the highest score for an R&B album with a 4.5/5 - she got praised from a lot KHH artists such as: Giriboy, Paloalto, Changmo, Simon Dominic, Khundi Panda, Chaboom etc... - she's close friend with singers Hoody and Sumin - she featured in Giriboy song "Why are we so tired" released in June 10, 2019 - her last release was the single "mama, see" came out in July 26, 2019
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YERI (MIXXXD BY)
- female dj and independent singer/producer of MIXXXD BY - she dropped out of elementary school to join Rappercussion (Rapercussion is a band founded in 2008 and has more than 120 musician members from different ages and background), although she was a minor at the time, the director of Rappercussion let her in, she played Caixa for about 4 years while being part of Rappercussion marching band - she has no regrets regarding dropping out of school and joining Rappercussion - thanks to an intensive research on Soundcloud and Instagram she formed the crew MIXXXD BY together with Fremuse (Visual Director) and Noz2cat (Producer) and others, they later found out they all attended the same school - MIXXXD BY concept is collaborating with various artists in order to create synergy, while music visuals express what music can't do on its own - she prefers working with others over working on her own - she's so dedicated about performing and making music that once after being sick and had gotten an IV shot at the hospital she went straight back on stage - even though she's a producer, she always thought of singing as something very interesting and exciting, she uses her voice a lot while producing, according to her, voices makes each individual unique because they are somehow hard to completely mimic not matter how hard someone tries
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LUCIGANG
- she was born in 1996 - independent artist - her name was inspired from Kendrick Lamar "Pimp To A Butterfly" Album where refers to Lucifer as Lucy she later added Gang as a way to make the name less feminine - released her first EP on July 4, 2018 called LOVE SCARS - she writes and produces almost all of her songs - she started making music when she was 22 - Dakshood taught her how to make beats - she's friend with High School rapper participant Young Kay who has been supporting her since debut - close friend (boyfriend?) with underground rapper Lucky Bando, she often features on his tracks - Lucky bando and Luci gang are also a duo called Newtown Bangers - she made the pixel art for her music video LET ME GIVE YOU A HUG - most of her musical references are US Rappers - her faveourite rappers are Tyler The creator and Asap Rocky - she enjoys games, reading comics and watching movies since she was a young student, she used to play League of Legends all throughout her high school years and also played Overwatch, she likes horror movies but nowadays she feels as if she became  a bit too sensitive to keep watching - she used to live out of the box since very young, she later struggled with mental health in her 20s - She released her very first album "Lucifer's Therapy" which actually explain all her past struggles she has endured, like a sort of "self therapy" story telling. - she can be pretty blunt so people who don't know her can take things personal - Luckybando is indeed Luci Gang boyfriend (lmao) - she would like to collab with BROCKHAMPTON - she is planning to release YouTube content that shows New Town Bangers' process of making an EP, in fact they are planning to release an EP in 2021 - when asked how she defines herself in one sentence she said "An Old Man"
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BAMSEM & HYEMINSONG
- both were born in the year 2000 - they are an independent duo - bamsem is the singer while hyeminsong is the producer - hyeminsong used to listen to Tablo Podcast a lot - bamsem dropped out of SOPA - although bamsem english pronunciation is good she admitted giving up on it at school - they first met on soundcloud, they were both 17 at the time and bamsem decided to reach out to hyeminsong, bamsem went all the way to Daegu to meet hyeminsong for the first time - they used to live together but they currently live in the same neighbourhood independently 2 minutes away from each other - even though they live 2 minutes apart, hyeminsong gets lazy to go visit bamsem - bamsem is a great cook and sometimes invites hyeminsong to eat with her - they released their first full album the 30th August 2020 which also includes their first pre-released single "Harue" - their album is titled "STRONG" but each song focuses on weakness aiming to become a stronger person - they both don't regret pursuing a career in music - they both sometimes wished they were under a record label - bamsem sometimes pretends to understand hyeminsong's jokes - bamsem is also Boytello's friend, they used to support each others music, now she sees him more as a "neighbourhood brother" - bamsem wrote "If you" for a "special someone" that now belongs to the past - when they don't agree on an idea they fight - bamsem featured on GEMma track "11:44"
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fgffbfghtr · 3 years
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. Above all she’s jealous of me. A goal was called on the ice, but after video review
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florosasimpre · 3 years
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Here We Go
TW: Assault
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Yes, I graduated, but I delayed posting any type of photos at this point because I didn’t want to [insert some inspirational quote here] like I’ve done everything else. Truth is, College was entirely easy as hell. The academia aspect was nothing a little discipline couldn’t get me through. Now I had classes where I wanted my one with the professor, but other than that, being intelligent was never an issue in college. The one thing that made me want to quit, the one thing that made me want to leave was the background fillers. No one ever talks about college and the background filler. I got so many stories saying college was the best time of their life, classes were hard, etc. no one mentions the journey of mental rise and fall. So I won’t post these photos, with a temporary filled smile, due to the graduation high that finally came, but I’m going to spill the truth that we forget to disclose.
From the moment I got accepted into Clark Atlanta University, it was a test.
1. I arrived to the university believing I was on a military scholarship
2. After discovering I was not on scholarship l, I spent every day in the financial aid office for 2 weeks until they enrolled me financially
3. I lost my best friend because we realized we were too different and set in our ways to try to salvage anything
4. The military told me I was too fat for my height and to kill two birds with one stone - I should pursue my dream of being a Marine and switch to that option, “because they don’t care so much about your weight”
5. I was ill-advised by an instructor who didn’t want me in the ROTC program in the first place because I didn’t arrive on scholarship
6. I separated from a long-term boyfriend that been with me through many life changes and developments
7. I had changed my major after sophomore year and went through a whole identity crisis- I then selected Psychology to be my path
8. Through out ROTC I was exercising on a torn ACL, unbeknownst to me, but my injury was always minimized or made to see like I was lying
9. My weight in ROTC was the consortium common knowledge and often people would ask me, “ how is the weight loss going”
10. I was removed from the ROTC program by not reaching BMI weight goals. I was to be 140 pounds- I was 165 - y’all I ain’t been that since like middle school lol
11. To release steam from being kicked out of ROTC and having a huge sense of my belonging snatch from me, I drunk a few drinks, only to be sexually Assaulted by someone I called my friend 2018 Labor Day weekend
12. Someone else I use to call a friend facilitated a fantasy where my survivor story became about them and perpetuated lies and rumors because they had feelings for the boy who assaulted me
13. now my sexual assault story is the Unit Shame that they still talk about to this day because majority of the battalion remained friends or endorsed the boy who assaulted me
14. I had a toxic workplace environment because the boy who assaulted me and the friend that spread lies were working with me and the manager had knowledge of said information and did nothing to accommodate anyone
15. The manager of said workplace was unprofessional and had inappropriate relationships with student’s- particularly fraternization
16. While that was happening at Morehouse College, the lies from my assault reached my own institution and I had residents - I was a RA, call me a whore and slut because of the rumors from my assault
17. One of my fellow “RAs” gossiped with the residents and aided in the misinformation where I lived and let the residents do what they wanted- making it harder for my coworkers and I to enforce rules
18. Because of they free will the residents had received from said RA, when it was not reciprocated amongst all RAs i was threatened with notes slid under my door in my residence building, and my property was destroyed
19. With all the mental jabs, I stopped going to class and my mother was .2 seconds from withdrawing me from the institution because she could tell she was losing me
20. I started dating again, but with sexual trauma and “an idea of standards” from my last relationship- I was disappointed 6x over - some people just foul, smh
21. I lost friends that I thought had my back, but only talked behind it. Ive consoled others through attempted suicides, a shooting, losing parents, their personal battles with sexual assault and other struggles that come with being a RA and a student
22. My senior year, research developments, and a trip to EGYPT! Was cancelled due to covid 19
So what pulled me through? It was a moment my junior year and that moment forward that I decided I was going to finish my journey. One thing about being a psych major is: you gone talk about trauma. You gone talk about it a lot. In talking about it, I realized that I was NOT the only person going through these things. The fact that a lot of young black men and women were experiencing the same things were tragic, but we related to each other and with the help of the professors and each other, I began to heal.
Although healing is not linear and I still have a ways to go from coming to terms with what the past has done to my mental- I can say I am in a better place from where I was. I am here, graduated. Through God, a reliable support system, and my preservation was am I able to stand before you as an Alumna of CAU.
This is not a story to tell you to ignore your mental health like me, but please seek what you need to be able to pull yourself out. You are not alone, you are around people that make you feel alone.
So this isn’t a post to tell you:
-graduated with (x) different honors, employed, grad school bound, yada yada yada because you already knew that
This is a post to show you different kinds of merits that made me who I now. Had I went to The college selected for me had I stayed and commute from school and home, had I done what was safe and familiar, I wouldn’t have clipped my wings and grown.
With all the things I’ve experienced in a lifetime, this is to show you: anyone can get through college academically, but do they have the means or mental fortitude to be able to push through. I’ve went through adversity and I am prepared to withstand more.
I’ll leave you with this: “[insert whatever you are going through] and finish it with “and yet I smile”. Because despite what you going through you always have the option to smile about it and boss up For you won’t know my hand unless I show it to you, you won’t know my struggles unless I tell you and you won’t get to be joyous in my success, unless I invite you.
And that's on Mary had a lil lamb
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uricl · 3 years
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NEW POST ( 2/19/2020 )
I hung out with him one night a few years back. He is very conscious of his reputation and goes out of his way to act gentlemanly. He’s funny and makes a lot of jokes in person. I would say more but don’t want to reveal who I am as I’m still close with some members of his team.
He made a joke about his dick size and then profusely apologized (again - super self conscious about his reputation), let us wear his sunglasses in the club, sang along loudly to his own music on the radio in the car, laughed at all our jokes too. He’s a goofball for sure. It’s funny all the guys with the worst reputations have been the nicest in person and the guys with happy-go-lucky reputations are the worst (ahem, Kid Cudi…)
It is true he was doing cocaine in front of Royalty. His friends do drugs around her but Nia didn’t file a protective order that I know of. She was blackmailing him for more money. Nia smashed most of his friend and a few other famous celebs before running off somewhere.
He is just complex asf..especially since he had another baby. Right now he refuses to hang with any other girl that isn’t Nikia.
I met Uriel when I lived in Miami…he got his friend to get my number for him at LIV. We hung out for maybe three months, and most of the time we didn’t do anything sexual honestly. He would just invite me over to watch movies or something. I think he’s really lonely. He also does a shit ton of ketamine, lean, and cocaine. This was during the time when he was dating nika…I didn’t know about her but then again he is uriel cain so I assumed he was messing around with a ton of girls. He doesn’t like using condoms…I’ll tell you that.
He has a million arcade games in his house and he has racks of clothing everywhere (in the halls, in the kitchen, in the living room) you can barely walk around. But overall he was actually…sweet. Respectful. Always made sure I was taken care of. We kind of just fell off because he’s a totally different person on drugs
🔴 WE’VE GOT THE TEA FOR YOU.
his family has been trying to get Uriel some help for a long time. His issues are deeper then being immature he has SERIOUS dark issues.
i have specific details about his abuse. It wasn’t normal spankings. One instance that I this person gave me is that his stepdad took his head and slammed it into the wall. The person I knew said that he was severely abused and that his step father used to lock him in closets whenever he was upset.
He once admitted a few years back that he “lost his virginity” at 8 years old to a 14 year old girl. The fact that he willingly admitted it to the world proves that he thinks there was nothing wrong with a 14 year old sexually assaulting an 8 year old.
His stylist says he hardly eats. I think that’s bad since he does cardio and dances frequently but I’m not sure.
My friend who works for Uriel always stresses that he is by far the nicest and warm hearted people to work with. He has helped my friend with so much financially and emotionally. He’s provided opportunities to my friend when he was struggling and I know that he has helped many of his employees with financial stuff and with there kids schooling.
Ive always thought he has BPD but who knows for sure. He’s diagnosed as bipolar and has a severe case of PTSD. But maybe being bipolar mixed with the issues he has and self medicating with cocaine/crack has something to do with that. Im pretty sure he’s a pill popper (xan) too based on what this person was telling me.
Uriel never wanted to be a musician he actually wanted to play basketball professionally.
Also Uriel hit his mom as an adult not a child.
Uriel took both of those girls around his family alot. Im not sure about this since I didnt ask. Uriel’s mom loved Zhara (who did spoil his family especially the kids and his mom) and hated Avery.
Uriel can be one of the nicest and friendliest people, per everyone I’ve known that knows him (NOTE: this does not negate the facts of his abusive and poor behavior). There’s a reason he still has so many friends and supporters in the industry and in his private life; when he’s straight, he’s a pretty decent person at heart. But dealing with anybody with his kind of demons is scary and unpredictable. Some legitimate Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde shit. Untreated mental illness mixed with teenage fame, constant public criticism, some enabling in his circle, and drugs will do a hell of a number on a person.
The tea on lipstick alley may have some truth to it, Uriel entourage and even his family as a history of spilling his most inner dark secrets to TMZ, TSR, and many other gossip blogs to collect a coin. It doesn’t matter how many of his cleaners he sends in to clean up the threads/post on him it doesn’t matter. Uriel is an extremely private person for a reason, and sadly the public will never get much of a chance to see the true Uriel. His life has been nothing but a struggle since the day he was born, his problems have always been existent. Zhara WAS NEVER the cause of his problems and his family will always love her to pieces and he still loves her as a friend until this day. But I supposed Uriel was born to be just a handsome tragedy. The only reason why Uriel still as a career is because of Deleon, if it was for him Uriel’s fame would have burnt out a long time ago. Uriel blames his mom for the many issues he has now, how would you feel if your mother just stood by and watched her new husband beat on you? Yes, Uriel has a big-heart, yes he is kind and generous, but untreated mental illness mixed with teenage fame, constant criticism, along with enabling and drugs will do a toll on a person.
NEW POST ( 12/7/2018 )
Leilani Uriel’s former fling did an interview with TMZ and spoke about her relationship with the singer. She said the two were very close and could have been something more if she didn’t step away from him. She said women who have petite and have more oriental features or small features seem to be more attractive to Uriel than most girls with an average body shape. Even though Uriel as fucked woman outside of his type those are the type of woman he tends to go for more. Uriel requires all of his girls not to be a homie hopper’s, have a big mouth and run to blogs, and at least spend time with him for at least 3 weeks. But for the three weeks you spend with him he will spoil you with trips and constant shopping. Uriel loves woman that have something going for themselves but still want the help of a man, Uriel likes to take care of those he’s affiliated with, so as long you don’t break the rules all will be well.
Leilani spilled the tea when it came to Winter and Uriel’s relationship and said it wasn’t what it seemed. After Winter caught Uriel in bed with another woman and attempted to fight said girl, that’s when things turned ugly. Uriel gave winter to shop with to make up for his mistake, but winter wasn’t having it and threatened to fuck Uriel’s friend Capo to make Uriel jealous. When they got back to LA a few weeks later Winter left the harem and Uriel kept a professional relationship with her just for her to come back a few days later, and then leave the harem again two days later. Uriel and Winter never had sex after the New York incident and Winter went outside of the harem to get fucked. Countless times Winter threatened to buy Uriel out of the development contract he had signed to her to, when she had the money to buy him out she did. And that pretty much ended their relationship.
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pentakillmaven · 6 years
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The Nose Knows, Chapter 4 (NaNoWriMo 2018)
Short chapter this time, but I really had fun writing this one! It’s a group text chat chapter!
Chapter Rating: T
Chapter Warnings: Unresolved mutual pining
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12
Chapter 4
Ladybug and Chat Noir met up a little after sunset at the top of the Arc de Triomphe. They didn't like to use the same meeting spot every time they patrolled, just in case a villain was tracking them, but the structure was a common starting point for their circuitous routes around the city. Ladybug bit her lip nervously as she thrust a wrapped box into Chat Noir's hand. "This is for you, Chaton."
"My Lady?" Chat cocked his head to the side as he furrowed his brow a little, but he accepted the box easily enough. "What's all this about?"
"Just open it!"
Nodding rather reluctantly, Chat tugged on the ribbon wrapped around the box, setting it aside for the moment while he tore through the paper. Lifting the lid, his eyes widened in surprise as he saw what was inside. "What in the…" He reached into the box, pulling out a black beanie hat with green paw prints stitched around the brim and faux leather cat ears poking out of the top. Alongside the hat was a fleece scarf with more of the paw print accents and a pair of faux-fur-edged gloves. "Bugaboo, these are amazing! Thank you!"
"Actually, Marinette asked me to bring this present to you. She said it was a thank you gift for saving her. Since it's nearly winter, she thought you might be able to use them if you get cold during patrol."
"Marinette made these? I knew she was a talented designer, but, wow. These are incredible."
Ladybug grinned. "I know, right? I'll tell her you like them!"
Chat shook his head quickly. "No, no, something like this, I need to tell her myself. Do you mind if I skip patrol tonight?" Chat wrapped the scarf around his neck and tugged the hat on over his head before he quickly started to pick up the wrapping paper, stuffing it inside the box alongside the gloves.
Ladybug's eyes widened in minor panic, though Chat was too busy to notice. "She's really busy right now! She's got some big tests coming up; it's probably better not to disturb her while she's studying. You can tell her another night."
Chat looked a bit disappointed, but nodded. "That makes sense. Tell you what--I'll put together something really nice to thank her for the gift, and give it to her when I get back."
"Get back from where?" It was Ladybug’s turn to look confused by Chat's sudden change of topic.
Chat winced a bit, scratching at the back of his head. "Y-yeah… My civilian identity has something going on that I have to leave town for a few days. I should be back by the beginning of next week, though. Do you think you can get Réna Rouge or Carapace to cover for me while I'm gone?"
"Wait, you're leaving town? As in leaving Paris?" At Chat's nod, Ladybug’s face tightened in concern. "Do you think it's smart to leave right after Hawk Moth just sent out the first Akuma we've seen in nearly a month? What if he's about to start on a rash of attacks? Réna and Carapace are great, but I need my partner."
"I'm sorry, Bugaboo, but I don't have any control over the situation. Like I said, it's a thing for my civilian identity."
Ladybug sighed in resignation, nodding slightly. "I know how that feels. All right. Just keep your Miraculous safe while you're gone, okay?"
"Of course. I won't let it out of my sight."
"Good. Now, shall we begin?"
"Of course, My Lady. Lead the way!"
Marinette dropped into her bedroom through the skylight, having already released her superhero transformation from Ladybug. She shivered, quickly pulling the skylight window shut to block the late autumn chill. Paris hadn't seen its first snow of the season just yet, but it definitely felt cold enough to do so, especially this late at night.
Marinette pulled her cell phone out of her pocket, noticing multiple notifications that she'd missed during her time as Ladybug. Some of them were the usual late-evening push notifications from her various games and apps; she also had a few new emails, mostly junk or advertising. The one notification that did catch her eye was from the group chat that she, Alya, Nino, and Adrien all had going on. It was mostly used for school-related discussions, but occasionally someone sent a funny meme or a video link to share to the rest of the group. Opening the messaging app, she scrolled back up to where the new messages began so she wouldn't miss anything.
[8:57 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Hey guys! Today was a lot of fun! Thanks for having us over, Marinette.
[8:58 PM] DJLahiffe: yeah same
[8:58 PM] AdrienAgreatest: I wanted to let you guys know that I won't be at school tomorrow. Actually, I won't be here the rest of the week. Father has some business to attend to in Milan, and he's taking me with him.
[8:59 PM] TheLadyblogger: what the hell Adrien??? doesnt your dad know that the bac practice tests are, like, next week??? how can he pull you out of school right now???
[9:02 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Trust me, Alya, I'm not happy about it either. I just found out earlier tonight, when I got home from Marinette's house. We aren't even leaving until tomorrow, but he made me come home early so that I could "get some good rest, because we have a busy schedule the next several days." Nathalie isn't saying much about it, but she did mention something about a potential merger with some Italian leather working company. I guess they make things like wallets, shoes, and belts? So the company would be able to offer more in the way of accessories that we don't really have right now.
[9:06 PM] DJLahiffe: wow. that sounds p cool but ur dad is still rude af tho
[9:08 PM] TheLadyblogger: i'm with nino on this one. @MariDC what do you think about this? are you as outraged as we are?
Glancing at the time, Marinette breathed a sigh of relief when she realized it was only 9:15. She quickly typed out a response.
[9:15 PM] MariDC: Sorry, just got back up to my room. Was helping Maman with dishes. I'm sorry to hear you're going to be missing class, Adrien! But if this is something your father wants you to do, I think it's important that you take it in stride. Look on the bright side! At least you don't have to sit through stuffy classes the rest of the week. Your teachers are always willing to work with you when you have to miss class. As long as you're back in time for the Bac practice tests next week, everything should be fine. You will be back by then, right?
[9:18 PM] AdrienAgreatest: According to Father, we will be flying back Sunday, so unless something unexpected happens, I should be back in time for the practice tests. Maybe we can do a video call study group one night, depending on how busy I am.
[9:19 PM] MariDC: That sounds great! Just let us know when you're free in the evenings.
[9:19 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Definitely. I'll keep you guys posted on what's going on. If previous experience is anything to go by, the next few days are going to pretty much be Father talking with a bunch of old people while I sit and do nothing. Either that or I'm going to be doing non-stop photo shoots while Father talks with the board of directors at the other company. This is the first time that I'm going to be out of the country, though, so that's exciting at least. I've never been to Italy before.
[9:22 PM] DJLahiffe: dude let me dm you some new remixes ive been working on, u can listen to them on the plane
[9:23 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Yes please! Anyway, I just wanted to let you guys know so you weren't worried about me tomorrow. Have a good night everyone!
[9:25 PM] TheLadyblogger: night adrien!
[9:25 PM] DJLahiffe: nite bro
[9:25 PM] MariDC: Good night, Adrien! Sleep well and safe travels!
[9:26 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Thanks :)
Setting her phone aside, Marinette sighed, the sound rather forlorn. She crawled out of bed to get into her pajamas, grabbing her History textbook for some more reading before she fell asleep.
However, despite her best efforts, her mind was buzzing with activity; she couldn't get settled enough to read the textbook and she wasn't tired enough to sleep yet. Her mind kept replaying the look on Chat Noir's face as he opened the gift she'd given him. It seemed so familiar, but she couldn't think of why. Not to mention the strange coincidence that both Chat and Adrien were going to be out of town at the same time. "Tikki?"
The Kwami poked her head out of her little dollhouse on the shelf beside Marinette's bed, where she'd settled once they'd gotten inside. "What is it, Marinette?"
"Chat Noir is going to be out of town for a few days starting tomorrow. And Adrien just messaged Alya and Nino and me saying he was going to Milan for the rest of the week."
"Oh… that's an interesting coincidence." Tikki looked up at Marinette intently, as if reading the girl's expression.
"Is it though? I know it sounds crazy, but… what if…" Marinette trailed off. No, that was too crazy for her to even imagine.
"What are you thinking, Marinette?"
"What if… Chat Noir's civilian identity… what if he works for Gabriel Agreste? What if he's going with Adrien and his dad to Milan, and that's why he's going to be out of town?"
Tikki's eyes widened at Marinette's suggestion. "That's… certainly a possibility, I suppose."
"I know we aren't supposed to reveal ourselves to each other without the masks, but if I was on the right track to figuring out his identity, you'd tell me, right Tikki?"
"Of course I would, Marinette. But I'm not sure if you're on the right track or not."
"Oh. Okay." Sighing, Marinette leaned back in bed, staring up at the ceiling as she continued to ponder the curious coincidence. This was getting her nowhere--she needed to get back to studying! With a huff, she picked up her textbook again, gluing her eyes to the page.
However, after trying and failing to read the same paragraph four times, Marinette set the textbook aside and picked her phone back up. Her fingers shook as she typed a private message to Adrien, and she had to reread the message twice to make sure she didn't have any typos before she sent it.
[9:45 PM] MariDC: Adrien? I have a question.
[9:46 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Hey again Marinette! What's up?
[9:47 PM] MariDC: Do you know Chat Noir?
Marinette held her breath as a message appeared in the corner of her screen: AdrienAgreatest is typing…
Ten seconds turned into thirty seconds, turned into a minute, and Marinette had to gasp for air before she passed out. Finally, after the longest two minutes of her entire life, Adrien's reply popped up on her phone.
[9:49 PM] AdrienAgreatest: I'm not sure why you're asking, but yes, I've at least met Chat Noir before. I don't know who he is behind the mask, though. Or, at least, I don't know if I know him. Does that make sense?
[9:50 PM] MariDC: Yes! That makes perfect sense. I have a confession to make: When I said I was at home the whole time the villain was attacking the school on Monday, I was lying. I actually got hurt in the bathroom when the villain first appeared, and Chat Noir saved me. I only lied to keep Alya and Nino from freaking out and worrying about me. Are you mad?
[9:53 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Why would I be mad at you? It's not like you intentionally put yourself in harm's way, right? I'm just glad you're alright. You're one of my closest friends and I would be devastated if something happened to you. I care about you a lot, Marinette.
Marinette's eyes widened almost comically as she read and reread Adrien's messages. She vaguely heard a loud, high-pitched squeal coming from somewhere in the room. It took her a minute to realize it was coming from herself.
[9:56 PM] MariDC: I care about you a lot too Adrien! I mean, you're one of my closest friends too! I love
Shaking her head wildly, Marinette deleted the text and started again.
[9:57 PM] MariDC: You're really important to me and I hope I didn't disappoint you or make you mad.
[9:58 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Don't worry about it, Marinette. You didn't do anything of the sort. Anyway, I should be getting to bed. It's late and I have to be up at 5 for us to make our plane.
[10:00 PM] MariDC: Oh lord! Yes, you do need to be getting to sleep! Can't have Mr. Model with saggy under eye bags, now can we? ;) Sleep well, Adrien. Let us know when your plane lands, all right?
[10:03 PM] AdrienAgreatest: Will do. Good night, Marinette. Sweet dreams :) (edited)
Marinette blinked, peering down at her phone in confusion. She'd glanced away for a moment, but she could have sworn that instead of her name, Adrien had initially written "Princess."
Did Adrien think of Marinette using pet names? Did he consider her his princess?
"Oh my god!" Marinette rolled over and stuffed her face into her pillow to muffle her squeal.
27 notes · View notes
bum-callout · 6 years
Text
the full regan tea!
i know this is long as HELL so there will be a tl;dr at the end for those who dont have the time to read it or just dont want to.
disclaimer 1: screenshots will be added to this as theyre located. a lot of this persons accounts/messages have been deleted, so some are hard to find, unfortunately.
disclaimer 2: no witch-hunting of this individual is encouraged. this is merely a warning to people who interact with them and something to document and fully address their lies over the past three or so years.
a little context:
this callout regards an individual who will be referred to as “regan” and they/them for the duration of this post to avoid confusion. a list of their known aliases is located here.
they currently go by alayne, and are most active on quotev, where their most recent urls are @jonestxwn (which is super disrespectful already lol) and @yearzer0. their old tumblr is @colacans, but if they have a new one, im unaware of it.
all victims names have been changed to preserve their privacy. here is a list of people mentioned:
gail: gail refers to the main victim of regans manipulation and their partner of several years. they started dating some time in 2015 or 2016. the broken heart emoji in some screenshots refers to gail. gails alters are also changed to “gail” for privacys sake.
jake: jake is another victim of regans, albeit a more minor one. jake met regan in 2015 and started dating them. jake is also often lied about as regan. the game controller emoji in some screenshots refers to jake.
skylar: ex-qpp/partner of regans. last testimonial is from them.
taylor: an ex friend of regans who theyd had various and sundry drama with over the 3 years of bs.
jay: an ex of regans that they parted on rough terms with.
any other censored names: people who i was sure would only be mentioned once.
gail and jake:
this is, without a doubt, the most important part of the callout, and unfortunately the part with the least viable screenshots, due to deletion of accounts/messages. gail has since deleted most of her messages from regan, but the ones that ive found/been given screenshots of are here (with gails explicit permission).
gail:
regan was incredibly shitty to gail during their 2-3 year relationship. i would go so far as to say regan was abusive. as will be seen in the actuallydivine section, regan blames a great deal of things on gail, and has never permanently taken the blame for anything in their rocky relationship; it has always, according to regan, been something wrong with gail.
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here are some examples of regan exhibiting abusive behaviour (tormenting gail because its “funny”), admitting to their own shitty behaviour, and mentioning cheating on her. its interesting to note they were also dating jake at this time, but they cared about him so little they didnt even mention the effect cheating might have on him.
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i find it interesting that regan admits to being shitty towards gail as far back as 2016, but has gone back to claiming they did nothing and that gail is the one at fault. perhaps it is a bit far to claim that regan is a pathological liar, but with their behaviour, i would not be entirely surprised.
another thing to mention regarding gail is that regan claimed gail pushed them into the habit of regan calling gail “daddy,” and then saying they were ace and it made them uncomfortable in the first place, when nothing could be farther from the truth. regan has publicly in front of their followers, almost 100% of whom were minors, talked about their R*PE KINK, and often called gail daddy unprompted on the feed and elsewhere. before anyone comes for me, im not claiming that they couldnt be asexual, but i am doubtful because of the fact theyve claimed that once or twice before and decided they werent, AND because of the fact they only used it to pin the blame on gail for this.
this doesnt even touch on the amount of times they threatened to kill themself.
jake:
regan and jakes relationship went as such: they met in 2015, when jake was 13 and regan was 16, and started dating. hopefully you can understand what is wrong with that, as a relationship with that age gap is ILLEGAL in every u.s. state. there was sexual conduct involved, making regan (arguably) a child predator. there is also a statement that regan dated another 13 year old when they were 17, but that is as yet unproven and the 13 year old in question is not contactable to confirm this. to the best of my knowledge, both of their current partners are also minors, despite the fact they are 19 as of october 2018.
regan was also extremely shitty to jake during this time, constantly “bullying” him (their own words) in a way that they found funny, but was clearly extremely upsetting to jake. they also pushed him aside for at least half of their relationship, as they were poly and their other partners (mostly gail) were more their focus.
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above is a conversation between jake and regan. regan came to him and asked him “what [they] ever did to [him]” and after respondingg and explaining why exactly he had beef with them, he discovered that them saying they wanted “no drama” was absolutely bs, as they had been posting a psa trying to get he and gail deleted for no reason that same day. afterwards, regan messaged jake asking for a truce, which jake refused, as he was furious with them and felt that they were not in a position to ask for a truce when they were doing things like this just hours before.
misc:
this is mostly just them talking shit, but some of the stuff they say is clearly lies if you consider evidence. they constantly paint themself as the victim when they are a 19 year old abuser who takes advantage of people regularly.
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(this last screenshot refers to jake changing his username to a pun based on the phrase “lies and slander”; its unclear whether regan sent this pretending to be someone else, or had someone they know send it.)
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i think its also interesting to note that this screenshot and later ones where regan is friends with jake are taken merely a month apart, and then, two months later, theyre back on their bs. something about that seems super fake to me.
actuallydivine:
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regardless of your opinion on actuallydivine, if you look at the lies section, you can see regan blaming gail for all their actuallydivine stuff and saying it was all a lie. yeah. bs.
mental illness:
i know this is a bit of a controversial subject, but a lot of stuff regan said/did concerning mental illness (ESPECIALLY involving their system/alters) was really shitty imo.
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this is a good example of something shitty they did alter-wise. this was something they claimed OVER AND OVER AGAIN, saying shitty things they did were always their evil headmates, and constantly killing off and creating new headmates (that were mostly actually just them under a new name) as an excuse for their behaviour and a way to reset for being a shitty person.
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heres them listing their mental illnesses. now, if you look in the lies section, regan says they faked their headmates (aka their osdd), so thats more proof theyre a liar. they also at one point bashed self-diagnosis, and yet they admit to self-diagnosing here. Hmm. something else to note is that in the first image, they seem to be claiming that their therapist diagnosed them, when diagnoses are made by psychiatrists, but that could be a simple oversight on their part.
lies:
self-explanatory, but this section is mostly regan saying or implying theyve changed and are now a better person.
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as you can see in the above screenshots, all taken at different times in the last two years, theyve done this thing over and over and OVER where they claim theyve changed, theyre better, something has changed their view, and that is simply not the case, and never has been.
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this last one is from this month (october 2018). sound familiar?
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these arent so much blatant lies as it is implying theyre any different now. also, funny to acknowledge that 2015 them was a piece of shit, when they really dont act any different now.
some other ridiculous things they lied about:
their height, at least three separate times.
their zodiac sign.
killers:
regan is very much a ‘true crime’ kind of person, and i do, in some aspects, mean the fetishize-y kind. theyre borderline obsessed with serial killers, and have expressed sexual attraction for ted bundy. however, thats not the only true crime-related bullshit theyve pulled.
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yeah. regans factkin with JIM JONES. and they made one of their urls “jonestxwn” like.. how disrespectful can you be? if they were a columbiner, i would not be surprised. for those who are not aware, jim jones is the cult leader who caused the jonestown massacre, which resulted in the death of 900+ people through mass suicide. its where the phrase “drinking the koolaid” comes from, as the poison was mixed with a koolaid-like product.
miscellaneous:
you thought regan could not be any more of a freak? you were wrong baybee!
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even without context this is a gross thing to do. however, context makes this worse: the individual in question, while they were NOT a good person, was around jakes age, if not younger, meaning that they were at least 3 years younger than regan at the time, and were most likely probably 13-14, judging by the time period when regan was interacting with them, so regan was 3-4 years older than this individual when they manipulated and fake dated them.
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just gross. its of note that regan turned 18 in 2017, so they were an adult or close to being an adult when they said this.
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hmm. kind of fetishize-y, but not the worst thing ive seen from regan.
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GROSS? stay away from children.
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honestly this ones just funny all things considered.
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this isnt the only time theyve referred to themself as a fujoshi, and some of those times were when they identified as female. yikes!
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yet another one thats just funny. they are genuinely a narcissist, and regularly refer to themself as some kind of genius (not to mention their god complex, which THEY THEMSELF refer to as such).
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another one like that mentioning their headmates and the fact they are, and i quote, “the smartest person alive.” come bless us mortals with your 300 iq, o god regan.
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OK MR KING OF EVIL LMFAO.
they were also into ddlg but i have no screenshots of that, as after a certain period, they prefaced a lot of their posts with stuff like “hehe im not into ddlg but i sure love calling my partner daddy!” despite having said, and i quote, “ddlg is my main kink,” at one point.
another point against them, which i have proof for but didnt feel was relevant enough to this: they love tearzah, and claimed to have been in a relationship with them. although tearzah (and melanie martinez... AND reinagoth) are people who they are a massive hypocrite about, as they acknowledged they were shitty and refused to support them, and then, mere months later, decided “nevermind, dont care, i love them xoxo.”
testimonials:
this is fairly self-explanatory; its testimonials by anonymous people who interacted with regan in the past detailing what they know of them.
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to add some extra context to the one directly above, this individual is younger than jake by a year.
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more of these will be added as i receive more.
conclusion:
i apologize for getting kind of unprofessional at the end, but this is a subject im emotionally involved in. again, i DONT advocate witch-hunting of this individual. theyre a shitty person but harassing them will do nothing constructive.
spreading this would be appreciated, though, as this person is genuinely a danger to those around them and has continued to lie about gail and jake up until extremely recently, if they are not still doing so.
tl;dr:
regan is an abusive person who takes advantage of minors, blames the people they abuse, and constantly lies about everything they can, among a plethora of other shitty-but-less-unforgivable things.
25 notes · View notes
patriotsnet · 3 years
Text
Who Are The Republicans Running For President
New Post has been published on https://www.patriotsnet.com/who-are-the-republicans-running-for-president/
Who Are The Republicans Running For President
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List Of United States Republican Party Presidential Tickets
Republican Lawmakers Are Terrified Of Trump Running For President Again
This is a list of the candidates for the offices of President of the United States and Vice President of the United States of the Republican Party, either duly preselected and nominated, or the presumptive nominees of a future preselection and election. Opponents who received over one percent of the popular vote or ran an official campaign that received Electoral College votes are listed. Offices held prior to Election Day are included, and those held on Election Day have an italicized end date.
Sen Josh Hawley Of Missouri
Though controversial, Hawley, 41, is a fundraising machine and hes quickly made a name for himself. The blowback Hawley faced for objecting to Bidens Electoral College win included a lost book deal and calls for him to resign from students at the law school where he previously taught. His mentor, former Sen. John Danforth of Missouri, said that supporting Hawley was the biggest mistake Ive ever made in my life.
Still, he brought in more than $1.5 million between Jan. 1 and March 5, according to Axios, and fundraising appeals in his name from the National Republican Senatorial Committee brought in more cash than any other Republican except NRSC Chair Sen. Rick Scott of Florida. Just because youre toxic in Washington doesnt mean you cant build a meaningful base of support nationally.
One Republican strategist compared the possibility of Hawley 2024 to Cruz in 2016. Hes not especially well-liked by his colleagues , but hes built a national profile for himself and become a leading Republican voice opposed to big technology companies.
Hawley and his wife, Erin, have three children. He got his start in politics as Missouri attorney general before being elected to the Senate in 2018. Hawley graduated from Stanford and Yale Law.
Trump Is Planning To Visit Iowa
If youre a politician with even an ounce of presidential ambition, you will find a reason to get to the state that hosts the first presidential caucus.
Trump signaled his intention to head to Iowa a week ago Monday, telling conservative talk radio show host Todd Starnes hes planning upcoming rallies in states including Iowa and Georgia. The Des Moines Register reported Tuesday that Trump will hold his rally Oct. 9 at the Iowa State Fairgrounds, his first visit to the state since the 2020 campaign.
Save America, Trumps PAC, has also made moves in Iowa, hiring two Republican operatives last month. Having a strong operation in place for the first caucus could be crucial if Trump wants a big win right out of the gate. He finished second in Iowa in 2016 to Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas.
Don’t Miss: How Many States Are Controlled By Republicans
Two Republicans One Backed By Trump Head To Runoff In Texas Special Congressional Election
A plane flies across the sky beside the U.S. Capitol dome in Washington, U.S., January 15, 2020. REUTERS/Tom Brenner/File Photo
WASHINGTON, May 2 A Texas Republican backed by former President Donald Trump has advanced to a runoff election to fill a U.S. House of Representatives vacancy left by the death of her husband, while Democrats were shut out of the contest.
Susan Wright, whose husband Ron Wright in February became the first sitting member of Congress to die of COVID-19, was the top vote-getter on Saturday in a crowded field of 23 candidates vying to represent the states 6th Congressional District. read more
Wright was headed to a runoff against another Republican in the Dallas-Fort Worth suburbs, a longtime Republican-held district.
Democrats had hoped to pick up the seat to expand their slim House majority. But they conceded Sunday they had missed the chance.
Wright received 19.2% of the vote, followed by former military fighter pilot Jake Ellzey, another Republican, who drew 13.8%, according to the Texas secretary of states office. Just 354 votes and less than half a percentage point separated Ellzey from Democrat Jana Lynne Sanchez, who was in third place with 13.4%.
Democrats have come a long way toward competing in Texas, but we still have a long way to go, Sanchez, the granddaughter of Mexican immigrants, said in a statement. Two Republicans will be competing to represent this congressional district.
Former President Donald Trump
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The biggest question mark for Republicans is if Trump will run for president in 2024. He hasnt exactly frozen the field, since Republicans are already positioning themselves to run, but perhaps hes refrigerated it a bit?
Trump is the 800-pound gorilla, said Dan Eberhart, a Republican donor. Trump has got command of the organs of the party and is going to have an enormous amount of resources and name ID and the ability to throw these rallies in the fall of 2022. I think that sets him up very well to being pole position for 2024 if he wants.
Trump, 74, is currently bettors top candidate on PredictIt, an online prediction market, and hes also led in several early polls, including a February Morning Consult/Politico poll. The poll found 54% of Republican voters would back Trump if the 2024 primary were held today. Those kinds of numbers would mean game over in a primary, but they also suggest many Republicans are eager for a new face.
During a recent podcast interview, Trump said he would make his decision on whether he will run in the 2024 presidential election sometime later, and after being asked which Republicans he thought represented the future of the party, he listed off some of the politicians youll see later on this list, including Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis, Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas and South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem.
Also Check: What Is The Lapel Pin The Republicans Are Wearing
Cancellation Of State Caucuses Or Primaries
The Washington Examiner reported on December 19, 2018, that the South Carolina Republican Party had not ruled out forgoing a primary contest to protect Trump from any primary challengers. Party chairman Drew McKissick stated, “Considering the fact that the entire party supports the president, we’ll end up doing what’s in the president’s best interest.” On January 24, another Washington Examiner report indicated that the Kansas Republican Party was “likely” to scrap its presidential caucus to “save resources”.
In August 2019, the Associated Press reported that the Nevada Republican Party was also contemplating canceling their caucuses, with the state party spokesman, Keith Schipper, saying it “isn’t about any kind of conspiracy theory about protecting the president;… He’s going to be the nominee;… This is about protecting resources to make sure that the president wins in Nevada and that Republicans up and down the ballot win in 2020.”
Kansas, Nevada and South Carolina’s state committees officially voted on September 7, 2019, to cancel their caucus and primary. The Arizona state Republican Party indicated two days later that it will not hold a primary. These four were joined by the Alaska state Republican party on September 21, when its central committee announced they would not hold a presidential primary.
Virginia Republicans decided to allocate delegates at the state convention.
Emboldened Unchanged Trump Looks To Re
The set of advisers around Trump now is a familiar mix of his top 2020 campaign aides and others who have moved in and out of his orbit over time. They include Miller, Susie Wiles, Bill Stepien, Justin Clark, Corey Lewandowski and Brad Parscale.
While his schedule isnt set yet, according to Trumps camp, his coming stops are likely to include efforts to help Ohio congressional candidate Max Miller, a former White House aide looking to win a primary against Rep. Anthony Gonzales, who voted to impeach Trump this year; Jody Hice, who is trying to unseat fellow Republican Brad Raffensperger as Georgia secretary of state after Raffensperger defied Trump and validated the states electoral votes; and Alabama Senate candidate Mo Brooks, according to Trumps camp.
Trumps ongoing influence with Republican voters helps explain why most GOP officeholders stick so closely to him. Republicans spared him a conviction in the Senate after the House impeached him for stoking the Jan. 6 Capitol riot, House GOP leaders have made it clear that they view his engagement as essential to their hopes of retaking the chamber, and Rep. Liz Cheney, R-Wyo., was deposed as Republican Conference Chair this year over her repeated rebukes of Trump.
Those numbers suggest that Trump could be in a strong position to win a Republican primary but lose the general election in 3½ years. A former Trump campaign operative made that case while discussing Trumps ambitions.
Don’t Miss: Patriots 247
Key Votes: 115th Congress 2017
For detailed information about each vote, click here.
Voted Yea on:;Agriculture and Nutrition Act of 2018
;Bill Passed on December 12, 2018
Proposed providing funding for commodity support, conservation, trade and international food aid, nutrition assistance, farm credit, rural development, research and extension activities, forestry, horticulture, and crop insurance through fiscal year 2023.
Voted Nay on:;Agriculture and Nutrition Act of 2018 )
;Bill Passed on June 21, 2018
Proposed providing funding for commodity support, conservation, trade and international food aid, nutrition assistance, farm credit, rural development, research and extension activities, forestry, horticulture, and crop insurance. It also proposed modifying the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, previously known as the food stamp program.
Voted Nay on:;Securing Americas Future Act of 2018
;Bill Failed on June 21, 2018
Proposed funding a border wall, limiting legal immigration, a mandatory worker verification program, allowing DACA recipients to apply for legal status, and preventing separation of families at the border.
Voted Yea on:;Agriculture and Nutrition Act of 2018
;Bill Passed on December 12, 2018
Reauthorizes through FY2023 and modifies some Department of Agriculture programs.
Voted Nay on:;Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act
Voted Nay on:;Kate’s Law
Voted Nay on:;No Sanctuary for Criminals Act
Voted Nay on:;American Health Care Act of 2017
Did not vote on:;Tax Cuts and Jobs Act
The Us Presidential Primary Process Explained
4 Republicans Who Should NOT Run For President
The presidential primaries are one of the most important elements of the American constitutional order. Given that general elections give voters just two starkly opposed choices, it’s largely through the primaries that nuance enters the political process. Parties define themselves by whom they select to run for president, and the ideological alignments that result end up defining the contours of political conflict.
And yet, despite primaries’ central role, nothing about them is laid out in the Constitution.
In fact, the framers didn’t envision American politics taking the form of two-party competition, so they gave no thought to how parties would select their candidates.
This, in turn, is part of what makes the primaries so fascinating. While the Constitution itself is incredibly difficult to change, party nominating rules and state laws are much more flexible.
Consequently, the presidential nomination process is one of the elements of the American political system that’s changed the most and often in ways that aren’t anticipated by the people driving the change.
Which leads to the last thing that makes primaries so fascinating: They are genuinely unpredictable. Conceivably almost anything could happen.
Also Check: Who Leads The Republican Presidential Race
Fragment Of Lincoln Speech To Kentuckians
A fragment of President Lincolnâs First Inaugural Address is attached to this speech intended for Kentuckians, indicating that it was prepared prior to his journey from Springfield to Washington. The assumption is that Lincoln either planned to receive a delegation from Kentucky during his stop in Cincinnati, or to make a quick excursion into his home state to deliver the speech. The speech itself confirms Lincolnâs belief that there was nothing he could say to appease the South without betraying the principles upon which he had been elected.
Abraham Lincoln. Speech intended for Kentuckians, February 1861. Holograph letter. Robert Todd Lincoln Papers, Manuscript Division, Library of Congress Digital ID # al0082p1, al0082p2
Bookmark this item: //www.loc.gov/exhibits/lincoln/the-run-for-president.html#obj23
Wheres Kamala Last Person In Room Harris Silent 6 Days Amid Afghan Pullout Chaos
Democrats are increasingly fearful Vice President Kamala Harris missteps will open the door for Republicans to regain the White House, a new report said Friday.
Dems, including senior White House officials, fear that Harris will lose to any Republican she faces including former President Donald Trump if President Biden does not seek reelection in 2024, Axios reported.
At 56, Harris is more than two decades Bidens junior and has been considered the heir apparent to the 46th president since he selected her to be his running mate last year.
While Harris will still be the presumptive nominee if Biden becomes the first president since Lyndon Johnson to not seek a second full term, Axios reports that a series of blunders have left officials and operatives concerned.
Right now, one operative told Axios, the feeling among Democrats isnt Oh, no, our heir apparent is fing up, what are we gonna do? Its more that people think, Oh, shes fing up, maybe she shouldnt be the heir apparent.
Harris has repeatedly been criticized for her handling of the illegal immigration crisis along the US-Mexico border, a problem Biden dumped in her lap in March by tasking her to deal with the root causes of the issue.
According to Axios, several White House officials have also described Harris office as a shtshow, poorly managed, and staffed with people who dont know the vice president well.
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Recommended Reading: Top Republicans In Congress
Benjamin Harrison: Campaigns And Elections
The Campaign and Election of 1888:
In the Mugwump revolt of reform Republicans against the candidacy of Senator James G. Blaine of Maine in 1884, Benjamin Harrison carefully walked the middle ground. Refusing to put his hat in the presidential ring, he eventually supported Blaine with energy and enthusiasm. In February 1887, Harrison lost reelection to the United States Senate in the new Democrat-controlled state legislature. One year later, Harrison announced his candidacy for the Republican presidential nomination, declaring himself a “living and rejuvenated Republican.” The words “Rejuvenated Republicanism” became the slogan of his presidential campaign.
At the Republican convention in Chicago in the summer of 1888, front-runner James G. Blaine, unable to secure the nomination for himself, threw his support to Harrison in the hope of uniting the party against the Democratic incumbent, Grover Cleveland. In the hotly contested nomination fight that followed, Harrison became everyone’s second choice in a field of seven candidates. When Senator John Sherman of Ohio, the first choice, faltered in the balloting, Harrison’s support surged ahead, winning him the nomination on the eighth ballot. The convention picked banker Levi P. Morton of New York as Harrison’s running mate. The Democrats, at their national convention in St. Louis, rallied behind incumbent Grover Cleveland of New York and his running mate, Allen G. Thurman, the senator from Ohio.
Opinion Polling For The 2020 Republican Party Presidential Primaries
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This is a list of nationwide and statewide public opinion polls that have been conducted relating to the Republican primaries for the 2020 United States presidential election. The persons named in the polls are declared candidates or have received media speculation about their possible candidacy. The polls included are among Republicans or Republicans and Republican-leaning independents. If multiple versions of polls are provided, the version among likely voters is prioritized, then registered voters, then adults.
Also Check: How Many States Are Controlled By Republicans
Consider Candidates Track Record And Party Service In Allocating Debate Slots
For a variety of legal and political reasons, the parties authority over their own debates is constrained.44 Yet debates are very important for introducing voters to the partys candidates. They are an essential aspect of the winnowing process. Selecting invitees is particularly challenging when the candidate field is large, as became evident in the Republican nominating cycle four years ago, when the candidates were so numerous that those who fell below a national poll threshold of 3.5% had to attend an undercard debate instead of the main attraction. One consequence was to favor a reality-television celebrity over veterans like Sen. Lindsey Graham, an expert on foreign affairs who had served South Carolina in the Congress since 1993. That seemed shortsighted and unreasonable at the time, and it seems all the more so in hindsight.
The California Recall And Its Very Real Political Consequences Explained
It’s a tactic that experts said is leading to threats against election workers, but also one they now expect to continue moving forward.
“I’m just kind of hanging on for ’22 and ’24, because I don’t think this is going anywhere anytime soon,” said Neal Kelley, registrar of voters in California’s Orange County and a Republican.
There has never been evidence to support the claim that widespread fraud affected the results of the 2020 election, but a wide majority of Republican voters still believe that they were. A recent Yahoo News/YouGov poll, for instance, found that 66% of GOP voters said last year’s election was stolen.
That conspiracy theory is taking a toll on voting officials, who now have to administer the country’s elections while also being subject to death threats and intense pressure.
One recent survey found that a third of election administrators nationwide felt unsafe while doing their jobs during the last election cycle.
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Allegations Of Inciting Violence
Research suggests Trump’s rhetoric caused an increased incidence of hate crimes. During his 2016 campaign, he urged or praised physical attacks against protesters or reporters. Since then, some defendants prosecuted for hate crimes or violent acts cited Trump’s rhetoric in arguing that they were not culpable or should receive a lighter sentence. In May 2020, a nationwide review by ABC News identified at least 54 criminal cases from August 2015 to April 2020 in which Trump was invoked in direct connection with violence or threats of violence by mostly white men against mostly members of minority groups. On January 13, 2021, the House of Representatives impeached Trump for incitement of insurrection for his actions prior to the storming of the U.S. Capitol by a violent mob of his supporters who acted in his name.
1 note · View note
maylovexhs · 6 years
Text
Hi darlings! It’s May! So first thing first, THIS IS NOT AN IMAGINE OR UPDATE. ITS JUST ME TELLING MY EXPERIENCE ABOUT MY HARRY SHOW. YOU DON’T HAVE TO READ IT IF YOU WANT TO. I saw a bunch of people doing threads and posting about how wonderful their time is and I was like I want to do it! I, in no way am trying to show off or brag about it. I just want to post it here because I’m friendly with y’all and I’ll just have the story on here for safe keeping. So ignore if you want(I put the keep reading for that) but yeah here’s my concert experience. WARNING: BELOW THE CUT IS A LONG LONG LONG POST. ENJOY THE SHAKY VIDEOS AND MY ANNOYING VOICE. This all happened one month ago ughh procrastination is the devil
I WENT TO SEE HARRY FUCKING STYLES LIVE IN CONCERT NIGHT TWO MSG AND I BLEW A KISS AT HARRY AND HE BLEW A KISS BACK.
. . .
he knows I exist.
Harry Styles knows I goddamn exist.
okay, let’s me backtrack a day or two before my concert. Actually a week, shall we?
So, it’s a week before Harry’s shows in nyc and I’m at home in Brooklyn with no harry tickets for none of the nights because of course 1. Both nights are sold out 2. I couldn’t buy tickets online from strangers cause y’all ever heard of scams? So, I’m at home in misery cause all over my twitter all my mutuals are tweeting how excited they are to go and I’m like “fUcKiNg GrEaT!” I’m pretty sure I posted shit of me gloating on here. ANYWAYS FAST FORWARD TO JUNE 21st, 2018(Harry’s first night/show at msg) and I’m on my living rooms couch on twitter. AND I DONT KNOW IF IT WAS THE UNIVERSE SAYING ‘WE GOT YOU HONEY’ or just a coincidence but the first thing i See is on my timeline is a tweet from ticketmaster saying along the lines of “Due to miscounting . . . There are tickets available for Harry Styles at msg night two . . .SALE” and I . . .i can’t even explain how I felt. It was like destiny. Like “SIS YOU WERENT MEANT TO GET TICKETS A LONG TIME AGO YOURE SUPPOSED TO GET THEM NOW. THIS IS YOUR CHANCE” and I was like “fuck it! I’m going to see my mans in concert and I couldn’t care about how shitty the seats are. It’s Harry of all people” so, I download the Ticketmaster app and ask my mom and my chill ass mom is like ‘really? The day before? This is a sign. God must really want you to see harry” and I’m like “YES”. So I use my moms card(I payed her back after) and buy the two tickets. AND LET ME JUST SAY! THE TICKETS! I GOT LUCKY WITH THE TICKETS. My tickets were seat 8 and 9, row 7, section 113
DO YALL KNOW WHERE THAT IS? THATS RIGHT NEXT TO THE STAGE! THATS THE SIDE BACK OF THE STAGE. And remember Harry’s stage is 360 honeys so I was hyped up. Honestly I thought it’s row 7, it’s not like we are in front! It’s not like he’s gonna see us. I’m bringing this up later cause well, you’ll see. But just remember I’m row 7. So I print out my tickets and I text my friends “HOES GUESS WHAT?” And I immediately text my best friend emmy(her nickname) “BISH IDGAF ABOUT YOUR STRICT PARENTS I WILL DRAG AND SNEAK YOU OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR THIS WE AINT MISSING HARRY. WE AINT MISSING SEEING THE MAN IVE BEEN IN LOVE WIG SINCE 2012” and thank god her parents said yes. Emmy and I spent like the next two hours like “Oh let’s make a sign that’s says sing Shania Twain still the one Harry!” and we talked about “what should we do in the city tomorrow before Harry’s show?” Our show day was a very busy day for us. Ready? Let’s go!
So, in the morning I had a college orientation with Emmy and my other friend(I’m calling her Anna for privacy reasons). I arrived there early so from 9:15 am, Anna Emmy and I were learning about our college and making our schedule. We left around 12:30 pm. Emmy and I decided to leave for the city after but we had to pee first so THANK YOU ANNA FOR LIVING CLOSE TO COLLEGE AND ALLOWING US TO USE YOUR BATHROOM. GRACIAS. Oooooh, fun fact: June 22nd was also my graduation date but Emmy and I wasn’t going in the first place so YAY!
Anyways we said goodbye to Anna and we took the train to the city. We stopped at canal street and went to Greenwich village? Why? My friend Emmy is a huge fan of Justin Bieber and 5 Seconds of Summer so we were just like “fuck it! Let’s go hunting for them! Maybe today’s our lucky day” so we are in Greenwich which justin was spotted in but with our luck we couldn’t find him. We were like ‘oh well! Let’s just stroll around’ so we walk and GUESS WHICH APARTMENT BUILDING WE WERE ABOUT TO WALK PAST BY?
HARRY’S. WE WERE ABOUT TO PAST HARRYS APARTMENT. WE WERE ABOUT TO WALK WHERE HARRY WALK. IM TOO HEADASS FOR HIM(btw I don’t stalk him, I didn’t stand outside his building, his apartment address is publicly online and I did not mean to walk past his apartment, IT JUST HAPPENED) I take out my phone and tell emmy where we were and luckily I took a sneak picture low quality of the building. BUT EMMY! EMMY! She was like “I WANT A GOOD QUALITY PICTURE!” Emmy goes, takes a picture of the doors and the security guards give her a mean look from inside the building. And we are like “ABORT MISSION! ABORT!” Moving on, we’re like if we can’t find Justin, we’ll try 5 Seconds of Summer. And guess what? We can’t find them either! At this time it was like, 3 or 4 Pm? And I really need to sit down cause ya girl has no energy whatsoever. So we take the train and go to the area where msg is and we get pizza. Btw msg area is mad busy. Like really busy. Continuing, we finish our pizza. We go check out the outside of msg and I learn that we aren’t allowed in until 6 pm(I heard it from girls outside) And i’m like okay? So Emmy and I buy and get these pride flags and we go to wait and sit outside where the driveway is. So we wait there for like an hour hoping we see anyone but we don’t cause that’s out fucking luck. But we saw like a dressing bag like the ones where suit and dresses are carried in. We highly doubt it was Harry’s suit but hey? Oh and I took a picture right here
Anyways it 6, we go inside, get through scanning and while we are in line, everyone decided to airdrop one direction memes and of course I joined
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We were let in at 6:45 pm and we were going to our section. By going, WE RAN. Literally we had to be stopped by a security guard to see our tickets. I’m getting off point but we get to our section and I’m expecting us to be in the middle cause it says row 7. And Emmy tells me we are in the second row and I was just like “??? Our ticket say row 7” and Emmy shows me that the section starts with row 6 and I was just like “BITCH WE’RE CLOSER THAN I THOUGHT. WE’RE ROW 2 ACTUALLY”. So we were seated between where Sarah and Adam was going to be. This was our view
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Then we put our shit down, I went to get my harry merch(I got a shirt) and we sat there in our seats waiting for Kacey to start at 8:30 and KACEY IS SO CUTE YALL HAVE NO IDEA SHE IS THE YEEHAW QUEEN. I USUALLY DONT LIKE COUNTRY MUSIC BUT THIS SISTER GOT SOME TUNES. Here’s me singing along(eXcUsE my cringy premature voice I’m 19) I was going crazy during crazy
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Then Kacey leaves and we gotta wait another 40 minutes for Harry. I kid you not the whole arena was singing Olivia by 1d even the security guard was shook af
As I was saying, we had to wait 40 minutes more for Harry so it was like 9:30 and FUCKING FINALLY HE COMES OUT AND I SWEAR EVERYONE LOST IT 
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ONLY ANGEL STARTED TO PLAY AND EVERYONE WAS SCREAMING. HE WAS SHINING IN HIS GODDAMN CALVIN KLEIN BLUE SUIT AND ISTG I KEPT TELLING MYSELF “BLOW KISSES AT HARRY! BLOW KISSES AT HARRY” SO THIS BISH HARRY COMES TO OUR SECTION I BLOW A KISS AT HIM LIKE THIS AND IDK IF HE SAW ME BUT HE BLEW A KISS WITH HIS HAND TO OUR SECTION AND YES IT GOT CAUGHT ON FUCKING CAMERA HOES
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I WAS FUCKING SHAKING. CAUSE I WAS CERTAIN DURING THE CHAIN HE BLEW A KISS BACK AND IF HE BLEW A KISS AT ME DURING ONLY ANGEL IT WOULD BE THE FIRST OF TWO my heart is racing just remembering it. I’ll continue. So he finishes only angel and he introduces himself and he’s so cute I can’t even
Then they play woman and someone threw a bra on stage and I was screaming inside
Then they play Carolina, Stockholm syndrome, Anna, esny, jalboyh and finally fucking MEDICINE. I was going crazy during medicine as we all should. Sarah and Adam were fucking ripping the song up and I couldn’t be more proud. Then Harry talked to the crowd more and THIS HOE CALLED THE BACK(aka us) HIS BEST FRIENDS AND IM JUST LIKE THANK YOU. Then they start to play meet me in the hallway and the goddamn back screen goes down, blocking us from seeing Harry perform the song. EMMY AND I KEPT SHOUTING DISRESPECT AND THE GIRLS IN FRONT OF US WERE LAUGHING. then he the screen lifted up again as he finished the song and he goes down the walk to the b stage with mitch. Mitch is so cute fam. And we could see him get a bunch of flowers and I’m like “it’s what he deserves”. So he’s on b stage now and he begins to sing sweet creature and iicf AND DURING IICF WE ALL HAD OUR FLASHLIGHTS ON IT WAS SO NICE AND LIKE HEAVEN. MY BABY HARRY STARTED TO TEAR UP DURING THE SONG AND I JUST WANTED TO HUG HIM. OOH AND WHILE THEY WERE ON B STAGE, SARAH ADAM AND CLARE WENT OFF THE MAIN STAGE. ADAM AND SARAH WERE TALKING OFF STAGE NEAR US I THINK I HAVE A VIDEO BUT ITS TOO DARK. BUT BASICALLY THEY WERE TALKING AND I GUESS IT WAS ABOUT HOW THEY WERE PLAYING CAUSE ADAM KEPT MAKING A GUITAR GESTURE AND ADAM HAD SUCH A GREAT SMILE AND SARAH WAS SO HAPPY So Harry and Mitch come back and they all play two ghosts and then wmyb 
They finish wmyb and Harry talks to the crowd. He talks to a fan who was visiting from another country and he’s like “what did you do here?!?” being all excited. Then he talks to the girl who came with “I AM WITH CHILD” sign and then we found out she lied and harry criticizes her and he’s like “WE’RE ALL TRYING!” and I couldn’t stop laughing. Emmy said she lost some brain cells during that part. So harry begins to talk about sign of the times and me and Emmy were like “let’s shout FUCK TRUMP out loud”. WE DIDNT. We didn’t have the chance to but WE TRIED. The girls in front of us were smiling and laughing at us. I blame Harry cause he kept on talking so he couldn’t hear it anyways. Anyways sign of the times plays and everyone has their flashlights on. IT WAS MAGICAL.
So harry and the band leaves to do something and I’m like “wtf u going” so I start to record and they go under the stage. I guess they were doing a photo down there but they come back on a minute later.
They perform from the dining table and I WAS SO SAD I WAS READY TO FIGHT WHOEVER HURT MY BABY. then from the dining table was over and Harry’s like “I’m gonna sing another song” AND I FUCKING TOLD EMMY “WATCH IT BE STILL THE ONE” and BITCH I WAS CORRECT. So he brings Kacey on
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They start to sing still the one and I was in my emotions fam and Kacey wore the rainbow dress and I was like YES QUEEN AND THEY BOTH MADE SO MUCH EYECONTACT IT WAS SO CUTE. Then Kacey leaves and they start to play the chain and I was like HELL YEAH AND DURING THE CHAIN HARRY SAID “DAMCE LIKE NO ONE IS NEXT TO YOU. YOURE NOT GOING TO SEE THESE PEOPLE TOMORROW” AND THAT HIT ME AND EVERYONE ELSE AND I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD THE WHOLE ARENA WAS SHAKING LIKE I COULDNT EVEN STAND BECAUSE I WAS AVOUT TO FALL FROM THE AMOUNT OF JUMPING GOING ON AND THIS IS WAS WHEN HE BLEW A KISS AT ME. SO ITS LIKE THE END OF THE SONG AND HE COMES TO THE BACK AND IMMEDIATELY START TO BLOW KISSES AT HIM WITH BOTH HANDS LIKE BEFORE AND I WAS PRETTY SURE HE SAW ME BECAUSE HE BLEW A KISS WITH BOTH HANDS IN MY DIRECTION AND THEN HE DID THAT TO ALL TE OTHER SECTIONS. BITCH I WAS SHAKING.
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The chain ends and they start to play kiwi and I get sad af because I know it’s the last song and harrrys like “this is the last song” and inside I’m like “I KNOW HOE DONT RUB IT IN MY FACE” I have to applaud miss Sarah jones whose fucking drumming was amazing. She fuckingkilled it. Kiwi plays and everyone was losing their shit having the times of their lives and then in the middle of kiwi some girl splashed Harry with water and he sings “YOURE GOING TO PAY FOR THAT” HE GOES STRAIGHT SAVAGE AND SOAKS HER AND EVERYONE AROUND. kiwi finishes and Harry does the whale water spit and oh my god it was ICONIC AF. Harry leaves first then the rest of the band and I was just standing there like SHIT. Emmy had to drag me out. I felt wasted after the concert IT WAS A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE. LET ME JUST TELL YOU IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO SEE HARRY LIVE GO FOR IT DONT MISS YA CHANCE. A WHOLE DIFFERENT SIDE OF ME EMERGED THAT NIGHT SO THANK YOU HAROLD I HAD PROBABKY THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFE THANKS TO YOU. EMMY AND I GOT TO DANCE WITH OUR PRIDE FLAGS AND WERE SO HAPPY. HARRY MAKES HIS SHOWS SO WELCOMING AND HAPPY. MISS CLARE IS SO CUTE. MITCH AND SARAH ARE SUCH PARENTS AND ADAM IS SUXH A GREAT FRIENDLY PERSON I MISS THEM SO MUCH THATS IT I MISS MY CONCERT SO MUCH I CRY
ALL PHOTO AND VIDEOS ARE CREDITED TO ME AND MY FRIENDS. DONT STEAL. I’ll post the full versions of the videos i have on my twitter. TUMBLR IS A DICK FOR ONLY ALLOWING GIFS of them. 
Btw should I also write about my 5sos iheartradio experience and seeing Harry at the Dunkirk premiere? Tell me if ya want to know byeeee
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animesavior · 6 years
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“I want to stay who I am. I want to be with you forever, Gene.“
-          Melfina, Outlaw Star (Ep. 26)
The Toonami Trending Rundown for March 17-18, 2018. We commemorate the 21st anniversary of the better cartoon show, as the block showcases the finale of Outlaw Star. Meanwhile among other great moments, Black Clover begins the Dungeon Exploration arc, while Goku, Vegeta, and Trunks prepare to head to the future to fight Black, and Rustal brings the pain to McGillis and Tekkadan forces.
On Twitter, Toonami would trend as with every show save for Naruto Shippuden and Ghost in the Shell, while Dragon Ball Super also trended worldwide. On Tumblr, Toonami would trend as with Dragon Ball Super, JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, and Hunter x Hunter.
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Unlike last year, Toonami didn’t bring much to commemorate their 21st anniversary (My guess is that they are focusing their efforts for the April Fools event coming in two weeks), instead showcasing an encore presentation of the Exquisite Corpse music video, created for their 20th anniversary by Titmouse.
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Jason however, did mention that there is plenty of material coming down the pipe over the next few years, including “some new programming choices that push us outside our normal comfort zone in the next year”. What kind of new programming? Hard to say. While there have been complaints that the block has been too over-reliant in Shonen Jump works, something that I mentioned on what probably contributed to One Piece’s demise last year, going too off the anime/action path into Network Decay territory has never worked for ratings either, something that was learned the hard way when CN forced Toonami to air the likes of Hamtaro and Wulin Warriors.
While we’ll still see a potential hit Shonen show come every now and then, and it would be a big shocker if the likes of Attack on Titan, One Punch Man, Tokyo Ghoul, and Sword Art Online didn’t return to air their sequels eventually, fans have been asking for more Seinen and Shoujo shows, and there are some action comedies, horror, dramas, and sports anime who could probably fit in the mix. Of course it should be noted that Adult Swim has aired the likes of Death Note, Durarara, and Paranoia Agent back in the day, and Toonami has aired Miyazaki and Miyazaki-esque films whenever they can air movies. On the other hand, due to its difficulty of fitting in an action packed lineup, I wouldn’t really hold my breath for any slice of life anytime soon, if ever and not to mention things that need heavy censorship is a big no-no, so ecchi and other “otaku pandering” material will be as likely as Toonami airing subbed anime, when pigs fly and hell freezes over. Re:Zero has been seen as a potential favorite to join the lineup by fans lately with its dub presently in the works, and some fans have asked for the likes of Food Wars, Erased, Made in Abyss, Pop Team Epic, The Ancient Magus Bride, among many others, so we’ll see what happens there. As always keep “voting with your eyeballs” and supporting Toonami or at least the shows you do like and keep sending Toonami your show suggestions on their Facebook and Tumblr message boxes, as it is the collective viewership who decides what the future of Toonami ultimately is.
Notable news involving Toonami's various programming include:
Toonami released some big news regarding the FLCL sequels this week. In addition to releasing a new trailer, which you can see below, we can now confirm when FLCL will premiere its new seasons. Season 2, FLCL Progressive, will premiere on June 2nd at 11:30pm Eastern, while season 3, FLCL Alternative, will premiere sometime in September. In addition, Kari Wahlgren has also announced that she will indeed be reprising her role as Haruko.
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Meanwhile in Dragon Ball Super news, Toei Animation has released a new trailer for the upcoming 20th Dragon Ball movie of the franchise, set to premiere in Japanese theaters on December 14, 2018. Of course, for those also watching the subbed version, the final episode of Super will be airing in Japan and on streaming sites this upcoming Saturday.
As Black Clover begins the Dungeon Exploration arc on Toonami, the next story arc following this will be the Royal Capital arc at Episode 20. Shonen Jump has released a visual for the next cour in the series that follows those events, which starts with the Blind Date arc, with the sub set to begin this arc in April, and Toonami getting there in roughly 2-3 months.
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Following the Toonami run of Lupin the Third Part IV, Discotek Media is presently hard at work on working on the Blu-ray of this season of Lupin, which will be available to purchase on May 29th. Due to contractual regulations by TMS and RAI, this Blu-ray will only have the English Dub and the background music will only have the soundtrack heard in the Italian version. A separate subtitled-only release that includes the Japanese soundtrack, will follow later this year.
And in Sword Art Online news, it has been announced that the side-story Alternative Gun Gale Online is set to premiere on Japanese television on Saturday, April 7. In addition, it has also been announced that season 3 of SAO, Project Alicization, will be premiering in Japan sometime in October. A new visual was also released featuring Kirito, Alice, and Eugeo, as well as a new trailer which you can see below. No word yet on what Aniplex’s plans are regarding simulcasting and a potential dub as of now.
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If you watched Toonami during the early 2000’s golden years, Outlaw Star needs no introduction to you. Originally premiering in Japan in 1998, it eventually was dubbed and made its way to Toonami in 2001 and alongside Cowboy Bebop and Trigun, became one of the big 3 western-inspired animes Toonami and Adult Swim introduced to us in the 90’s and early 2000’s.
Given its status as a Toonami classic, Episode 25 would be apart of the April Fools 2012 lineup on the Toonami revival. Despite fans hoping the series could be ran fully on the modern Toonami, due to Bandai Entertainment’s closure, it would not be until August 2017 when FUNimation assumed the distribution rights and started releasing the long awaited Blu-rays, that Outlaw Star would be able to make its return to Toonami for a long awaited, remastered, and mostly uncut encore run, including for the first time ever, airing the infamous Hot Springs Planet Tenrei episode.
The show did pretty solid regarding social media buzz during it’s 26 week run, as it would trend in the US in some capacity during all but 2 weeks of its run.
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Now this is the part of the article where I would say what the future could hold for this franchise, but unfortunately as of now, there is no such future. A 13 episode sidestory, Angel Links, was produced, but didn’t exactly go so well, and there’s presently no legal way to check out the show to our knowledge besides old DVDs. There was hopes for a sequel back in the day, but for one reason or another, it never materialized and considering it’s been 20 years since the show’s end, the demand and will to produce a sequel has largely dried up. But as we’ve seen with FLCL and Samurai Jack among others, if Toonami has shown us anything, it’s that nothing is impossible, and especially considering that reboots, sequels, and adaptations of classic anime hits have been quite popular these days, I wouldn’t be surprised if Toonami or someone else considered some kind of revival one day.
Regardless, considering its Toonami legacy and how well it holds up to this day, Outlaw Star was quite a joy to watch, back in the old days and even today. All I can say on behalf of everyone, thanks for the memories.
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As mentioned last week, with the new shows not ready to go just yet, and with April Fools incoming that will likely pre-empt the schedule for the special event in the next two weeks, Toonami will hold off on announcing and premiering said new shows for now. Instead, next week Toonami will be setting things up for these upcoming events, with Space Dandy moving up to 2am EDT, followed by a doubleheader of Cowboy Bebop to showcase its finale at 2:30am-3:30am. Until next week, stay gold as always.
Legend: The shows listed are ordered based on their appearance on the schedule. Show trends are listed in bold. The number next to the listed trend represents the highest it trended on the list (not counting the promoted trend), judging only by the images placed in the rundown. For the Twitter tweet counts, the listed number of tweets are also sorely based on the highest number shown based on the images on the rundown.
United States Trends:
Toonami/#Toonami [#23]
#DragonBallSuper [#6]
#DBZKai [#20]
#BlackClover [#20]
#JoJosBizarreAdventure [#18]
#GundamIBO [#21]
#HunterXHunter [#19]
#OutlawStar [#12]
#SpaceDandy [#7]
#CowboyBebop [#22]
Worldwide Trends:
#DragonBallSuper [#1]
Tweet Counts:
Toonami [8,040 tweets]
#Toonami [5,584 tweets]
#DragonBallSuper [68.1k tweets]
DB Super [2,070 tweets]
#DBZKai [1,260 tweets]
#BlackClover [1,631 tweets]
#JoJosBizarreAdventure [1,893 tweets]
#GundamIBO [1,337 tweets]
#HunterXHunter [2,512 tweets]
#OutlawStar [1,508 tweets]
Tumblr Trends:
#toonami
#dragon ball super
#jojo’s bizarre adventure
#hunter x hunter
Notes and Other Statistics:
#DragonBallSuper: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @ComicBook and @ToeiAnimation started the trend in the US.
#BlackClover: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @maioceaneyes started the trend in the US.
#GundamIBO: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @KyleMcCarley started the trend in the US.
#HunterXHunter: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @TaraSandsLA started the trend in the US.
#SpaceDandy: @WhoTrendedIT reported that @FUNimation started the trend in the US.
Special thanks to @coreymbarnes and others I forgot to mention for spotting some of the trends on this list.
Only Toonami on [adult swim] on Cartoon Network.
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【Critique in the Front Line】Between public and private: theatre performances through the school system—A field note from getting lost and soaked in search of the arts
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The design of Norwegian elementary schools is made with a very specific set of users in mind: teachers, staff and pupils (and to some degree, also their parents). They are all usually introduced to the school building at the beginning of term, and after this everyone knows where the different rooms are, where to go and who to talk to. In Norway, the schools also have a secondary function as art venues. Where and how does the art critic and criticism more generally fit into this programme?
The Cultural Schoolbag: Art experience for all pupils
Since 2001, Norwegian school-age children have been introduced to professional art on a yearly basis, as a part of the public school. The project is called “The Cultural Schoolbag” (TCS), and it is a national project where the Ministry of Culture and the Ministry of Education and Research collaborate. The idea is that all school children are to experience professional art and culture of all sorts:
The programme gives pupils the opportunity to experience, become familiar with and develop an understanding of professional artistic and cultural expressions. The activities must be of professional quality and cover the entire cultural spectrum: film, cultural heritage, literature, music, performing arts and visual arts.[i]
In the beginning, the programme included the first ten years of education, but in 2008 it was expanded and now also includes high school. This means that children experience art and culture every year, through their 13 years of elementary education.
Norway is a rather small country, with approximately 5.3 million inhabitants. These people are spread in cities and villages along a long coastline and in valleys and highlands and forests. The politics of governing Norway is explicitly decentralised, and this also goes for TCS. Norway reduced the amount of county councils from 19 to 11 in 2020. These are usually responsible for regionally programming, but some municipalities have also developed their own programmes. The funding of the programme is made possible through allocating lottery funds from profits earned by Norsk Tipping (the Norwegian state lottery operator), in addition to funding as well as administrative powers from the county councils.  
Since 2016, the organisation Kulturtanken – Arts for Young Audiences has had the national responsibility for the programme and allocating the funds. In 2019 the total amount received was NOK 285 million.[ii] I started on a PhD project in September 2019 where I will be researching how youth experience performing arts through this system. I will explore performative, creative and critical writing as a means to gain empirical data to my project. In addition to gaining data, I am interested in how critical, performative and creative writing with the arts can be used by youth. I am curious as to how the specific TCS context forms the audience, what sort of spectatorship it produces, but have at this point in my research no data to analyse. This essay is based on my observations and experiences through my practice as a critic and are more anecdotal than scientific.
The critic in/out of the loop
As I have written about previously in my article “The critic as an uninvited guest” (2018),[iii] the critic or the researcher is an odd figure in arts contexts with target groups such as children. When the performance is explicitly not aimed at you, how are you to judge relevance or quality? And even more so when the performances take place in spaces that are not always specially designed or even adapted for the arts. Through TCS, all children in Norway, of all classes and backgrounds, are introduced to a wide variety of arts expressions. Several of the country’s main art institutions either tour their productions with the TCS system, or have daytime performances or exhibitions for pupils. The geographical nature of Norway, with schools quite literally spread all over the country, has also led to an extensive touring system with art productions that only tour the TCS. The productions are public in themselves, but the performances (each viewing/showing) are closed for the public. Whether they take place at a school or at a theatre, these performances are usually not open to the public.[iv] As a critic, this has made it difficult to gain access—or even get information about which performances will be touring, or premiering, where and when. There is no press contact, no newsletter, nor any calendar with information on up-coming premieres. TCS and the schools have developed systems with culture contacts in the schools, as well as local or regional administrative contact persons whose task is to maintain communication between the schools and the artists. Kulturtanken has been working on a new online portal that will make the communication flow easier, for both the schools and the artists. As a critic, on the other hand, one is not really in the loop.
Watching performance in school
In my experience, the arrival of the critic at a TCS production is usually unannounced. One tends to have made an appointment with either the central programmer or the artists. This information is usually not forwarded to the art venue: the school. Finding the location for the performance can prove to be a more time-consuming task than initially thought. Just finding the right entrance at the school often takes five minutes (there are usually few or no signs indicating the way to the main entrance). The school has few outside visitors, so why should they?
This winter I ventured on a trip to an elementary school in the southern part of Norway to see the theatre performance Balladen om Reidun Robertson og Steven von Gutenberg (The Ballad of Reidun Robertson and Steven von Gutenberg). The production/performance was made by a theatre that calls itself “The Other Theatre” (Det Andre Teatret). The theatre is based in Oslo and their performances are usually based on improvisation. Upon entrance of the school, escaping the pouring rain outside, and finally locating the right entrance, I asked a child if she knew where the administration was. “No”, she promptly answered. “How about the teachers’ room, then?”, I asked. Upstairs, she pointed. In the administration, no one knew about the performances taking place, but were more than happy to find out for me and point me in the right direction. I ventured out in the rain again, and once again relied on pupils to find the right building and entrance. There were no signs or posters indicating where to go or when to enter, as the schools have their own systems that they don’t need to announce: Everyone there knows how it works. So, I sneaked inside, found a place at the back of the auditorium, in order not to block some of the young spectators’ view.
Two pupils were already present, as well as a couple of teachers; preparing and organising. A teacher arrived, followed by a class of children. He stood next to a row, pointed inwards and shouted the number of a class. The row quickly filled up, and the teacher moved about the space, indicating and shouting, and within few minutes, the rows were packed with children, laughing and talking, taking off their wet jackets and scarfs and hats. On stage, two children gathered, together with a performer, and quietly welcomed everyone (both performers and children) and hoped everyone would enjoy the performance. And thus, the performance could start: The lights were turned down, the performer in place, and music started playing. Comments on and imitations of what was said on stage was heard throughout the entire performance. Since the performance was based on improvisational methods and interactivity with the audience, a lot of the comments were welcomed from the stage and included in the plot, and other times ignored.
Watching performance in theatre
When I recently attended a children’s performance in a public theatre, on a Saturday, the dynamics were different. As far as I could see, none of the children present came without one or several adults. Be it parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts or other caretakers; the children were accompanied by adults. Next to me was a mother and her two sons, out of which one of them was very bored (by his own statement). He kept creeping onto his mother’s lap, whispering loudly, “It’s not fun anymore, can we please leave?” Upon which, his mother responded that he had to concentrate, or she tried to point at things on stage, and exclaimed things like “Look!”, or “Wow!”, in a desperate attempt to make the performance fun or relevant to her son. No such look, as far as I could hear or see.
In my experience, be it public performances or TCS performances: In theatre for children, there are usually comments or questions from the audience. In public theatres or venues, the questions and comments are directed towards the accompanying adult, whereas in TCS they are shared among the pupils or directed towards the stage. How this specific way of watching performing arts— “watching others with others”, to lean on Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick and Rachel Fensham[v]—affects the art experience is something I hope to learn more about through my research. Perhaps young critics and writers could reflect on this, from their own perspective. For all I know, this might influence them less than I, as an outsider and professional spectator, expect them to.
Performances for TCS
After nearly twenty years of TCS, we still know fairly little about how the programme has influenced the children and their relation to the arts. During the children’s and youth theatre festival Showbox in Oslo in December 2019, a panel of seven teenagers discussed performing arts and teenagers. Early on, they all concluded with the following: “The most important thing in performances is to feel something.”[vi] TCS is, as mentioned, a collaboration between the Ministry of Culture and the Ministry of Education and Research, and it is stated in the programme’s goals that TCS should 1) help ensure that students are given the opportunity to experience professional art and culture, 2) make it easier for students to experience, become familiar with and develop an understanding of all forms of artistic and cultural expression, and 3) help ensure that artistic and cultural expression is aligned with educational objectives.[vii]
“Educational objectives” is a wide description and could perhaps also include the Kitchen Table demand: learning through emotions. From a critic’s point of view, the performing arts programme certainly gives the children the opportunity to become familiar with, if not “all” forms of cultural expression, at least a vast amount of it. There are for instance several productions and artists touring in the TCS programme, that also tour extensively internationally and are a part of the general contemporary theatre and dance context.
Among them are the performance Garage by Cirka Theatre, which this spring has eight planned performances at Dansens Hus/House of Dance in Oslo for TCS. The performance has also toured to festivals in Italy, France, Germany and China. During the international ASSITEJ Artistic Gathering festival in Kristiansand in September 2019, several of the festival productions were also made available for TCS. Apart from Garage, the programme includes performances such as Vanity of Modern Panic by Gunilla Lind Dance Theatre and Playful Tiger by Barrowland Ballet. The national contemporary dance company Carte Blanche and theatre and dance companies like NIE Theatre, Panta Rei Dance Theatre, Jo Strømgren Company and Yngvild Aspeli/Cie Plexus Polaire all tour their productions both internationally and within TCS.
Most of these performances are touring productions that travel around the country and perform the performances locally (either at the schools or at public theatres or cultural houses). But some of the productions are not tour-friendly, so to speak, and rely on the pupils traveling to the theatres. Among these productions is the main stage musical Charlie and the Chocolate Factory at one of the national theatres in Norway. Pupils in the sixth grade in Oslo also have the possibility to be taken on a tour to the programming venue Black Box Theatre where they are introduced to the different elements of a theatre, such as lighting and sound design.
In this way, children are introduced to a wide variety of arts expression early on. They are introduced to different ways of approaching dance and theatre, and knowledge of and experiences with art is thus no longer restricted to those who can afford it or have family or caretakers who introduce them to it. Whether one chooses to seek out the arts in one’s spare time, or even choose it as a professional career, is at least made available as a choice everyone can make an informed decision on.
Art criticism in TCS
In addition to administrating art, TCS also includes some introduction courses to criticism. I have myself taught in one of these courses developed by music critics Ida Habberstad and Hild Borchgrevink, as well as developed my own course on criticism of performing arts. In one of the county councils these courses have been coordinated with the schools, and the pupils have had the possibility to write a review as a part of their exams. One of these programmes took place in the spring of 2017, when the administrative center of the county council had invited four critics from literature, film, music and performing arts to develop introductory courses. We all met and shared previous experiences with this, as well as tools and tasks. Through this, a total amount of 741 pupils from five schools were introduced to criticism as a part of TCS. After the courses, the pupils attended a festival where they saw performances, readings, concerts and films. Those who wished to do so could then write about their art experiences in a review on their school exam in April.
On other occasions, the schools and critics have collaborated with local newspapers and texts written by some of the pupils have been published. This year, the Norwegian Critics Association, Kulturtanken and the online magazine Periskop (which is dedicated to critique, debate and journalism on art for children and youth) started a joint project. In the fall of 2020, three critics with background from literature, visual arts and performing arts, will develop a workshop on criticism. This will be a pilot project with the working title “The Critical Schoolbag” which aims to invite the youth to explore formats of criticism.
Through TCS, all children and youth are introduced to the arts, but the public debate surrounding the art in this specific context still has a way to go. Who are to write about this art, and on what grounds? How could criticism by children and youth look like, in what formats and for which readers or listeners? Through my research and the pilot project “The Critical Schoolbag”, I hope to explore these topics further.
[i] The Cultural Schoolbag. (n.d.). This is the Cultural Schoolbag. Retrieved March 18, 2020, from https://www.denkulturelleskolesekken.no/english-information/this-is-the-cultural-schoolbag/
[ii] Approximately HKD239,013,754 (as at 16th March 2020).
[iii] Pettersen, A.T. (2018). The critic as an uninvited guest. In A.T. Pettersen & M. Veie (Eds.), Criticism for an absent reader (pp. 82-93). Oslo: Uten Tittel Forlag.
[iv] Exceptions are made here. Sometimes the schools buy/get tickets to evening performances where the pupils watch performances alongside “regular” spectators. Some local festival performances are included in the TCS programme, as festivals also tend to have daytime performances and pupils become a (rather large) part of the festival audience.
[v] Fensham, R. (2016). Affective spectatorship: Watching theatre and the study of affect. In C. Stalpaert, K. Pewny, J. Coppens & P. Vermeulen (Eds.), Unfolding spectatorship: Shifting political, ethical and intermedial positions (pp. 39-60). Gent: Academia Press. pp.54.
[vi] Kitchen Table Talk at Showbox in Oslo, Norway, on 5th December 2019. The festival is held at the main avantgarde theatre scene in Oslo, Black Box Theatre, and it is arranged by Scenekunstbruket (Norwegian Network for Performing Arts for Young Audiences). It is a “nationwide provider of performing arts for young audience in Norway”, and the organisation is also a part of the European project called “TEEN2”, which is responsible for the Kitchen Table Talk. It should be added here that I have been part of several projects initiated and/or led by Scenekunstbruket, and that I was part of the European project “TEEN” through which the format of the Kitchen Table Talk was developed.
[vii] The Cultural Schoolbag (n.d.). This is the Cultural Schoolbag. Retrieved March 18, 2020, from https://www.denkulturelleskolesekken.no/english-information/this-is-the-cultural-schoolbag/
This essay was originally published on the website of International Association of Theatre Critics (Hong Kong), on the 27th of March 2020. The essay was a contribution to the column of Critique in the Frontline.
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theliberaltony · 6 years
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via Politics – FiveThirtyEight
Pretend I’m the owner of a polling company that surveys political races. I prominently advertise my results: According to a Walt Hickey Polling Inc. survey of 600 likely voters, John Doe is beating Jane Doe 58 percent to 40 percent — John Doe will likely win the election. (Let’s say it’s a race for the U.S. Senate.)
But then you keep reading and you notice that the sample on which my poll is based consists of 400 men and 200 women. You can’t really tell whether I’m adjusting the numbers, and if so, how. Would you trust that number? Unless there’s some state I don’t know about where men outnumber women 2-to-1, you shouldn’t.
So why aren’t we more skeptical of movie ratings that do the same thing?
It’s a worthwhile question, and lately it’s made it pretty hard for us to take the ratings provided on IMDb, the largest and most popular movie site on the internet, at face value. The Academy Awards rightly get criticized for reflecting the preferences of a small, unrepresentative sample of the population, but online ratings have the same problem. Even the vaunted IMDb Top 250 — nominally the best-liked films ever — is worth taking with 250 grains of salt. Women accounted for 52 percent of moviegoers in the U.S. and Canada in 2016, according to the most recent annual study by the Motion Picture Association of America. But on the internet, and on ratings sites, they’re a much smaller percentage.
“If you see any number that is a rating number or a number with a percentage sign, it may be compelling or meaningful and it may not be,” said Gary Langer, the president of Langer Research Associates, the polling firm that has long conducted surveys for ABC News. “And what we need to do rather than be seduced by the number is to subject it to meaningful inquiry as to how it was obtained.”
OK, but how skeptical should we be? To figure that out, I wanted to see how strong the male skew of raters is on IMDb and how big an effect that skew has on movies’ scores.
We’ll start with every film that’s eligible for IMDb’s Top 250 list. A film needs 25,000 ratings from regular IMDb voters to qualify for the list. As of Feb. 14, that was 4,377 titles. Of those movies, only 97 had more ratings from women than men. The other 4,280 films were mostly rated by men, and it wasn’t even close for all but a few films. In 3,942 cases (90 percent of all eligible films), the men outnumbered the women by at least 2-to-1. In 2,212 cases (51 percent), men outnumbered women more than 5-to-1. And in 513 cases (12 percent), the men outnumbered the women by at least 10-to-1.
Looking strictly at IMDb’s weighted average — IMDb adjusts the raw ratings it gets “in order to eliminate and reduce attempts at vote stuffing,” but it does not disclose how — the male skew of raters has a pretty significant effect. In 17 percent of cases, the weighted average of the male and female voters was equal, and in another 26 percent of cases, the votes of the men and women were within 0.1 points of one another. But when there was bigger disagreement — i.e. men and women rated a movie differently by 0.2 points or more, on average — the overall score overwhelmingly broke closer to the men’s rating than the women’s rating. The score was closer to the men’s rating more than 48 percent of the time and closer to the women’s rating less than 9 percent of the time, meaning that when there was disagreement, the male preference won out about 85 percent of the time.
That male skew of raters is also apparent in the 250 movies that make IMDb’s top list, which we pulled on Feb. 16:
So, what’s the issue here? If IMDb is content with its ratings being intended almost solely for men, then there isn’t one. (We reached out to IMDb for comment and for more information on how the site adjusts its ratings, but we received no response. So we don’t know, for example, if IMDb is already doing something to the data that accounts for the gender disparity in raters.) But if IMDb seeks to reflect the opinions of the actual movie-going population, the situation is grave.
Can we fix that? Langer is skeptical. Mainly, besides how simple it is for a dedicated individual or group to “manufacture” results, online data from a self-selected group of people is so inherently dubious that any reweighting of that data is also inherently dubious. You can’t just adjust troublesome data to make it reflect the world, he said.
“The notion that you can take bad data and weight it to be OK is … hazardous to your health,” Langer cautioned.
That said, since the scores of the most popular movie site on the internet are already being calculated based on an entirely self-selected sample, would it destroy the IMDb Top 250 to try to mimic actual movie audiences more? I don’t really think so. As a thought experiment, I used everything we know about IMDb’s rating adjustments — which is far from the full picture — and ran them on the ratings of the 4,377 eligible films after I adjusted the raw ratings to weight men’s and women’s views equally.
We can’t do an adjustment that allows us to perfectly replicate the top 250 — again, we don’t know what’s in the black box, so we can’t re-create it — but to approximate it, I excluded any film that didn’t either a) make the IMDb top 1,000 movies list or b) have a rating from the site’s top 1,000 users within 0.87 points1 of the rating from its users overall. This allows us to sidestep films that would have made the top 250 through vote-stuffing.
My main point is that overall, the naive reweighting didn’t destroy the general look of the 250, and if anything, it elevated films that may have been overlooked because one gender is vastly outnumbered.2
What if IMDb adjusted ratings toward gender parity?
Estimated highest-ranking films on IMDb if the men’s and women’s ratings were weighted toward 50-50 vs. IMDb’s actual rank as of Feb. 16, 2018
Rankings Year▲▼ Film▲▼ Actual▲▼ Women only▲▼ Men only▲▼ Gender- weighted▲▼ 1994 The Shawshank Redemption 1 1 1 1 1972 The Godfather 2 10 2 2 2008 The Dark Knight 4 3 3 3 2003 The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King 8 2 4 4 1993 Schindler’s List 6 6 11 5 1999 Fight Club 10 5 8 6 2001 The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring 11 7 10 7 1957 12 Angry Men 5 27 7 8 1974 The Godfather: Part II 3 22 5 9 2010 Inception 14 8 6 10 1994 Forrest Gump 12 9 13 11 2002 The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers 15 11 14 12 1994 The Lion King 47 4 29 13 1994 Pulp Fiction 7 15 9 14 2014 Interstellar 30 25 15 15 1999 The Green Mile 32 12 28 16 1975 One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest 16 24 19 17 1966 The Good, the Bad and the Ugly 9 115 12 18 2006 The Prestige 48 26 16 19 1998 American History X 31 17 27 20 2012 The Dark Knight Rises 65 23 22 21 1997 Life Is Beautiful 25 16 41 22 1980 Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back 13 41 17 23 1994 Leon: The Professional 27 21 37 24 2002 City of God 21 64 20 25 1995 Se7en 22 28 23 26 2001 Spirited Away 28 13 56 27 1991 The Silence of the Lambs 23 20 33 28 2006 The Departed 40 35 26 29 1990 Goodfellas 17 71 18 30 2011 The Intouchables 37 19 52 31 2014 Whiplash 45 54 30 32 2000 Gladiator 46 44 24 33 2012 Django Unchained 60 29 31 34 2002 The Pianist 39 31 53 35 1946 It’s a Wonderful Life 24 56 51 36 1960 Psycho 34 55 40 37 1977 Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope 20 48 32 38 2009 Inglourious Basterds 97 32 43 39 1998 Saving Private Ryan 29 70 25 40 1995 The Usual Suspects 26 58 36 41 1999 The Matrix 18 62 21 42 2000 Memento 49 57 34 43 1942 Casablanca 36 73 42 44 1999 American Beauty 63 51 35 45 1985 Back to the Future 44 49 46 46 2001 A Beautiful Mind 144 34 68 47 1954 Rear Window 43 80 60 48 2000 Requiem for a Dream 80 50 49 49 2011 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 218 14 126 50 2006 The Lives of Others 58 86 78 51 2010 Shutter Island 177 39 59 52 2008 WALL-E 62 42 62 53 2004 Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 87 38 66 54 1980 The Shining 61 61 47 55 1997 Good Will Hunting 102 60 48 56 1971 A Clockwork Orange 84 79 50 57 2001 Amelie 82 30 90 58 1954 Seven Samurai 19 336 39 59 1983 Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi 76 87 63 60 1992 Reservoir Dogs 77 94 64 61 2017 Coco 51 209 166 62 1988 Cinema Paradiso 54 165 97 63 1979 Apocalypse Now 50 219 38 64 1940 The Great Dictator 53 262 101 65 1950 Sunset Boulevard 55 190 108 66 1931 City Lights 35 294 92 67 1997 Princess Mononoke 64 118 100 68 2015 Room 143 82 139 69 2003 Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl > 250 36 113 70 2004 Howl’s Moving Castle 137 43 216 71 1962 To Kill a Mockingbird 89 102 135 72 2009 Up 115 37 117 73 2014 Gone Girl 179 81 70 74 2010 Toy Story 3 98 66 82 75 1936 Modern Times 38 248 96 76 1988 Grave of the Fireflies 57 159 133 77 2006 Pan’s Labyrinth 130 74 91 78 2016 Hacksaw Ridge 175 161 124 79 1968 2001: A Space Odyssey 91 195 54 80 2007 Into the Wild 181 84 95 81 1958 Vertigo 72 154 87 82 2015 Inside Out 140 78 107 83 2005 Batman Begins 116 106 58 84 1975 Monty Python and the Holy Grail 103 123 104 85 2009 3 Idiots 93 203 93 86 2003 Oldeuboi 67 171 73 87 1964 Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb 56 236 57 88 1991 Terminator 2 42 178 44 89 1959 North by Northwest 74 205 99 90 1968 Once Upon a Time in the West 33 447 55 91 1981 Raiders of the Lost Ark 41 131 65 92 1995 Toy Story 94 85 80 93 1952 Singin’ in the Rain 90 110 170 94 2016 La La Land 207 122 86 95 1979 Alien 52 151 67 96 1941 Citizen Kane 71 188 74 97 2002 Catch Me if You Can 219 97 81 98 1983 Scarface 105 181 69 99 1976 Taxi Driver 88 164 71 100 2014 The Grand Budapest Hotel 194 65 128 101 1987 Full Metal Jacket 92 177 83 102 2010 How to Train Your Dragon 176 47 165 103 1984 Amadeus 83 128 121 104 2007 There Will Be Blood 165 212 72 105 2012 The Avengers > 250 52 144 106 1984 Once Upon a Time in America 69 337 88 107 2013 The Wolf of Wall Street 150 158 45 108 2005 V for Vendetta 151 76 112 109 1939 Gone With the Wind 157 46 279 110 2003 Kill Bill: Vol. 1 174 89 114 111 1995 Braveheart 75 141 61 112 2003 Finding Nemo 166 53 151 113 1999 The Sixth Sense 160 75 116 114 2011 The Help 241 33 245 115 2015 Star Wars: The Force Awakens > 250 92 154 116 2015 Mad Max: Fury Road 204 135 79 117 2000 Snatch 100 144 76 118 2016 Dangal 73 649 195 119 2016 Zootopia > 250 95 187 120 2001 Donnie Darko 226 91 122 121 2008 Gran Torino 158 121 120 122 1989 Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade 112 156 84 123 2012 Jagten 101 183 141 124 1988 My Neighbor Totoro 132 112 183 125 1996 Trainspotting 156 107 127 126 2013 12 Years a Slave 201 100 131 127 1959 Some Like It Hot 118 124 186 128 1973 The Sting 95 284 143 129 2013 Prisoners 215 148 98 130 2017 Logan 202 193 103 131 2016 Your Name 79 399 190 132 2007 Taare Zameen Par 81 448 138 133 2011 A Separation 109 242 125 134 1997 Titanic > 250 45 188 135 2011 Warrior 154 213 134 136 2017 Dunkirk 236 192 145 137 2015 Spotlight 205 155 152 138 1986 Stand by Me 192 125 184 139 2014 X-Men: Days of Future Past > 250 113 159 140 2004 Kill Bill: Vol. 2 > 250 116 157 141 2014 The Imitation Game > 250 69 209 142 2010 The King’s Speech > 250 59 206 143 1986 Aliens 68 217 85 144 2004 Downfall 121 288 115 145 1998 Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels 142 199 130 146 1997 L.A. Confidential 106 225 94 147 2016 Arrival > 250 169 137 148 1957 Paths of Glory 59 704 109 149 2017 Blade Runner 2049 147 368 102 150 1991 Beauty and the Beast 247 40 379 151 2014 Guardians of the Galaxy > 250 111 147 152 1962 Lawrence of Arabia 85 396 105 153 1993 Jurassic Park 198 150 118 154 1927 Metropolis 108 331 182 155 2016 Deadpool > 250 126 155 156 2012 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey > 250 90 192 157 2001 Monsters, Inc. 224 77 196 158 1988 Die Hard 122 220 77 159 1989 Dead Poets Society 238 103 239 160 2010 Black Swan > 250 98 161 161 2015 The Martian > 250 134 160 162 1957 Witness for the Prosecution 66 476 229 163 2004 Hotel Rwanda 190 176 181 164 2009 Star Trek > 250 117 199 165 2013 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug > 250 109 205 166 2009 Hachi: A Dog’s Tale 212 127 288 167 2017 Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri 111 351 204 168 1981 Das Boot 70 603 111 169 1995 Heat 123 332 89 170 1978 The Deer Hunter 159 346 153 171 1980 The Elephant Man 148 261 177 172 1931 M 78 465 167 173 1950 All About Eve 114 227 302 174 1921 The Kid 99 459 249 175 1944 Double Indemnity 86 433 169 176 2013 Her > 250 194 106 177 2009 Mary and Max 178 175 274 178 2017 Thor: Ragnarok > 250 200 260 179 2013 Dallas Buyers Club > 250 146 175 180 1960 The Apartment 107 322 189 181 2008 In Bruges > 250 239 140 182 1998 The Truman Show 206 132 149 183 2010 Incendies 131 300 253 184 1939 The Wizard of Oz 232 119 241 185 2008 Slumdog Millionaire > 250 99 191 186 2007 No Country for Old Men 162 244 75 187 1999 The Boondock Saints > 250 254 250 188 2009 The Secret in Their Eyes 135 265 198 189 2016 Lion > 250 170 332 190 2017 Baahubali 2: The Conclusion > 250 1170 343 191 2015 The Revenant > 250 214 129 192 2004 Million Dollar Baby 203 163 162 193 2005 Babam ve Oglum 117 526 291 194 1963 The Great Escape 126 479 174 195 1948 Bicycle Thieves 96 458 202 196 2004 Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban > 250 72 339 197 2006 Blood Diamond > 250 172 212 198 1993 The Nightmare Before Christmas > 250 105 318 199 1974 Chinatown 129 360 158 200 2012 The Perks of Being a Wallflower > 250 108 232 201 1990 Edward Scissorhands > 250 67 357 202 1949 The Third Man 127 484 224 203 2003 Big Fish > 250 133 226 204 2013 Rush 193 252 172 205 1954 Dial M for Murder 155 352 233 206 1995 Before Sunrise 211 179 228 207 1940 Rebecca 173 250 350 208 1992 Unforgiven 120 543 110 209 1979 Life of Brian 183 266 179 210 1998 The Big Lebowski 167 256 123 211 1992 Aladdin > 250 120 308 212 2000 Amores Perros 209 260 225 213 2007 The Bourne Ultimatum 234 235 156 214 2007 Ratatouille > 250 138 211 215 1996 Fargo 161 230 164 216 1995 Twelve Monkeys 245 238 163 217 1965 For a Few Dollars More 104 792 142 218 1980 Raging Bull 124 599 119 219 2005 Serenity > 250 208 295 220 1967 Cool Hand Luke 172 539 215 221 1969 Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid 210 421 231 222 1957 The Bridge on the River Kwai 138 581 180 223 1988 Rain Man > 250 182 217 224 1965 The Sound of Music > 250 101 516 225 1957 The Seventh Seal 141 462 223 226 1993 In the Name of the Father 188 408 268 227 2014 Wild Tales 185 323 282 228 1939 Mr. Smith Goes to Washington 145 466 297 229 2006 The Pursuit of Happyness > 250 185 220 230 1995 Casino 146 419 136 231 1987 The Princess Bride 214 136 298 232 1950 Rashomon 110 626 185 233 2008 Iron Man > 250 140 244 234 1975 Dog Day Afternoon > 250 417 252 235 2014 PK > 250 646 246 236 2005 Sin City > 250 231 148 237 1954 On the Waterfront 139 546 237 238 1982 Gandhi 227 370 221 239 2017 Call Me by Your Name 186 347 528 240 2011 X: First Class > 250 157 248 241 1948 The Treasure of the Sierra Madre 119 786 230 242 2014 Kingsman: The Secret Service > 250 174 259 243 2012 Life of Pi > 250 152 257 244 2016 Captain America: Civil War > 250 215 265 245 2005 Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire > 250 96 431 246 2004 The Notebook > 250 63 452 247 1976 Rocky 220 442 132 248 2013 About Time > 250 189 269 249 1977 Annie Hall 233 289 218 250 2003 Mystic River > 250 245 219 251 2011 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo > 250 216 222 252 1992 Scent of a Woman > 250 276 255 253 2007 Atonement > 250 139 366 254 2011 The Artist > 250 197 325 255 2014 Big Hero 6 > 250 129 462 256 1986 Platoon 187 490 176 257 1984 Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind 213 378 301 258 1973 The Exorcist > 250 309 178 259 1925 The Gold Rush 136 684 306 260 1953 Roman Holiday > 250 206 426 261 1982 The Thing 163 528 146 262 1984 The Terminator 229 318 150 263 1985 The Breakfast Club > 250 137 391 264 2007 Persepolis > 250 291 477 265 2004 Before Sunset > 250 263 240 266 1959 Ben-Hur 195 481 227 267 1961 Judgment at Nuremberg 134 752 375 268 2013 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire > 250 83 525 269 2004 The Incredibles > 250 222 208 270 2000 Remember the Titans > 250 312 346 271 2001 Shrek > 250 143 323 272 1934 It Happened One Night 184 366 424 273 2001 Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone > 250 88 530 274 2006 Casino Royale > 250 282 200 275 2014 Edge of Tomorrow > 250 293 203 276 2014 How to Train Your Dragon 2 > 250 186 395 277 1941 The Maltese Falcon 216 541 271 278 2014 Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) > 250 299 168 279 1974 Young Frankenstein > 250 443 334 280 1957 Wild Strawberries 152 609 329 281 2001 Ocean’s Eleven > 250 221 262 282 2004 Shaun of the Dead > 250 233 261 283 1967 The Graduate > 250 285 254 284 2006 The Fall > 250 223 594 285 1995 La Haine 231 561 276 286 2006 Little Miss Sunshine > 250 149 349 287 2003 Dogville > 250 328 365 288 2015 The Hateful Eight > 250 411 171 289 2005 Pride & Prejudice > 250 68 754 290 2014 Nightcrawler > 250 380 173 291 1990 Dances With Wolves > 250 375 264 292 1986 Castle in the Sky 250 379 310 293 2010 Tangled > 250 93 599 294 1999 The Iron Giant > 250 418 312 295 2000 In the Mood for Love 240 358 423 296 2016 Hidden Figures > 250 180 651 297 2008 Yip Man > 250 744 214 298 1951 Strangers on a Train > 250 478 371 299 1948 Rope > 250 503 369 300 2009 Moon > 250 350 284 301 2016 Manchester by the Sea > 250 427 243 302 1951 A Streetcar Named Desire > 250 348 448 303 1986 Ferris Bueller’s Day Off > 250 255 303 304 2001 Mulholland Drive > 250 349 242 305 2014 Captain America: The Winter Soldier > 250 204 316 306 2009 District 9 > 250 324 193 307 1982 Blade Runner 149 341 197 308 1999 Magnolia > 250 444 194 309 1985 Brazil > 250 554 287 310 2002 The Bourne Identity > 250 298 256 311 2002 Hero > 250 492 355 312 2005 Cinderella Man > 250 495 286 313 2000 Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon > 250 354 313 314 1999 Toy Story 2 > 250 249 266 315 2013 Star Trek: Into Darkness > 250 191 417 316 1968 Rosemary’s Baby > 250 343 304 317 1946 Notorious > 250 500 450 318 1976 Network 191 720 273 319 2016 Rogue One > 250 283 337 320 1997 Children of Heaven 128 678 519 321 2007 Hot Fuzz > 250 259 331 322 1983 A Christmas Story > 250 415 377 323 2004 Crash > 250 226 336 324 2010 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 > 250 104 696 325 1995 Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge > 250 902 437 326 2013 Captain Phillips > 250 270 340 327 2005 Walk the Line > 250 224 418 328 2017 Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 > 250 241 446 329 2007 Elite Squad > 250 974 307 330 1982 E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial > 250 246 370 331 2000 Dancer in the Dark > 250 400 447 332 1966 Persona 196 548 400 333 2009 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo > 250 269 412 334 2008 Let the Right One In > 250 384 270 335 2014 Boyhood > 250 335 238 336 2012 Barfi! > 250 877 440 337 2009 Mr. Nobody > 250 253 434 338 1993 True Romance > 250 557 280 339 2010 My Name Is Khan > 250 535 517 340 2009 The Hangover > 250 258 247 341 1926 The General 153 891 381 342 2012 Moonrise Kingdom > 250 232 386 343 2012 Les Miserables > 250 168 499 344 1979 Stalker 197 767 347 345 2017 Baby Driver > 250 389 305 346 2012 Silver Linings Playbook > 250 237 251 347 2016 Contratiempo > 250 589 561 348 2004 The Sea Inside > 250 428 507 349 2006 Apocalypto > 250 364 373 350 1959 The 400 Blows 200 637 374 351 2017 Get Out > 250 344 314 352 1988 Akira > 250 882 267 353 1964 Fistful of Dollars > 250 950 278 354 2009 The Blind Side > 250 198 488 355 2008 Taken > 250 257 315 356 2008 The Curious Case of Benjamin Button > 250 211 320 357 2007 The Diving Bell and the Butterfly > 250 432 397 358 2011 Drive > 250 361 207 359 2003 Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter… and Spring > 250 572 416 360 1987 The Untouchables > 250 604 300 361 1944 Arsenic and Old Lace > 250 464 617 362 1996 Sling Blade > 250 715 464 363 2008 The Boy in the Striped Pajamas > 250 207 601 364 2002 Talk to Her > 250 394 430 365 1979 Manhattan > 250 508 359 366 2013 Short Term 12 > 250 474 529 367 2015 Straight Outta Compton > 250 513 459 368 2010 Despicable Me > 250 145 543 369 2000 Almost Famous > 250 320 322 370 1982 Pink Floyd: The Wall > 250 656 510 371 2006 Children of Men > 250 355 263 372 2014 Ex Machina > 250 362 272 373 1997 Boogie Nights > 250 660 213 374 2013 Queen > 250 1005 484 375 1973 Papillon > 250 831 354 376 2010 Elite Squad: The Enemy Within > 250 1116 352 377 2014 The Theory of Everything > 250 173 591 378 1940 The Philadelphia Story > 250 393 766 379 1940 The Grapes of Wrath 221 728 403 380 1971 Harold and Maude > 250 436 685 381 2016 Captain Fantastic > 250 363 505 382 1993 What’s Eating Gilbert Grape > 250 202 574 383 2003 Memories of Murder 199 916 330 384 2009 Avatar > 250 228 296 385 2002 Infernal Affairs 243 875 292 386 1994 Three Colors: Red > 250 644 415 387 1976 All the President’s Men > 250 755 420 388 2016 The Handmaiden 246 595 549 389 1955 The Night of the Hunter > 250 737 471 390 1995 Underground > 250 751 541 391 1990 The Godfather: Part III > 250 440 358 392 1984 Paris, Texas 244 736 455 393 2010 The Fighter > 250 452 283 394 1966 Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? > 250 537 565 395 2014 The Fault in Our Stars > 250 187 513 396 2005 Brokeback Mountain > 250 162 611 397 2007 Chak de! India > 250 1278 317 398 2006 Lucky Number Slevin > 250 416 363 399 1991 JFK > 250 847 324 400 1998 The Legend of 1900 242 608 607 401 2017 The Greatest Showman > 250 272 972 402 2000 O Brother, Where Art Thou? > 250 401 387 403 2010 The Social Network > 250 414 201 404 1997 Gattaca > 250 356 390 405 2012 Argo > 250 243 409 406 1993 Groundhog Day 230 457 210 407 1962 The Manchurian Candidate > 250 849 506 408 1984 This Is Spinal Tap > 250 762 348 409 2013 Frozen > 250 130 692 410 1990 Misery > 250 402 466 411 2007 The Man From Earth > 250 764 290 412 1968 Planet of the Apes > 250 789 294 413 2000 Cast Away > 250 314 328 414 1998 Black Cat, White Cat > 250 676 605 415 1971 Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory > 250 333 496 416 1985 Ran 133 1207 234 417 2008 Changeling > 250 296 405 418 2006 Rang De Basanti 180 1218 236 419 1989 Glory > 250 768 427 420 1989 Back to the Future Part II > 250 374 338 421 2004 The Bourne Supremacy > 250 413 333 422 2006 Letters From Iwo Jima > 250 791 364 423 1952 High Noon > 250 890 407 424 1997 The Fifth Element > 250 247 546 425 2017 Wonder Woman > 250 196 706 426 1995 Ghost in the Shell > 250 917 361 427 1961 Yojimbo 113 1281 235 428 2015 Bahubali: The Beginning > 250 1491 393 429 2007 Zodiac > 250 435 275 430 1990 Awakenings > 250 467 559 431 1993 Three Colors: Blue > 250 552 603 432 1950 Harvey > 250 645 680 433 2014 Fury > 250 449 341 434 1993 Philadelphia > 250 277 644 435 1998 The Celebration > 250 785 404 436 1946 The Big Sleep > 250 750 489 437 1987 Wings of Desire > 250 622 638 438 2016 Hunt for the Wilderpeople > 250 605 701 439 1994 Chungking Express > 250 712 600 440 2012 Kahaani > 250 1212 478 441 1958 Touch of Evil 228 1008 356 442 2004 Finding Neverland > 250 240 570 443 2004 The Machinist > 250 330 438 444 1987 Empire of the Sun > 250 530 668 445 2012 Wreck-It Ralph > 250 281 458 446 1968 Night of the Living Dead > 250 837 385 447 1993 Carlito’s Way > 250 876 326 448 1996 The Bandit 171 1181 362 449 1997 The Game > 250 441 367 450 1946 The Best Years of Our Lives 239 772 604 451 2004 Man on Fire > 250 406 444 452 2014 The Lego Movie > 250 397 380 453 1964 Mary Poppins > 250 234 806 454 1959 Anatomy of a Murder > 250 864 515 455 1999 Being John Malkovich > 250 392 383 456 2015 The Big Short > 250 515 299 457 2008 The Wrestler > 250 621 289 458 1954 La Strada > 250 748 623 459 1999 All About My Mother > 250 405 712 460 2007 3:10 to Yuma > 250 511 456 461 1975 Barry Lyndon 225 991 281 462 2009 Fantastic Mr. Fox > 250 423 445 463 1922 Nosferatu > 250 716 468 464 2017 Wonder > 250 577 862 465 2006 The Last King of Scotland > 250 455 535 466 1980 The Blues Brothers > 250 687 372 467 2012 Skyfall > 250 295 401 468 1997 As Good as It Gets > 250 367 396 469 1955 Diabolique 223 910 534 470 2016 Kubo and the Two Strings > 250 600 616 471 1972 Solaris > 250 996 429 472 2013 Before Midnight > 250 453 449 473 1989 Kiki’s Delivery Service > 250 357 674 474 1994 Ed Wood > 250 545 384 475 1960 La Dolce Vita > 250 793 512 476 1993 The Fugitive > 250 569 392 477 1967 Bonnie and Clyde > 250 648 501 478 1996 Primal Fear > 250 426 578 479 2002 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets > 250 142 831 480 1999 The Insider > 250 863 378 481 2004 3-Iron > 250 651 719 482 1965 Doctor Zhivago > 250 714 577 483 1927 Sunrise 164 995 633 484 2009 Zombieland > 250 329 414 485 2001 Lagaan: Once Upon a Time in India 249 1190 293 486 1993 Tombstone > 250 794 526 487 2008 Departures > 250 731 613 488 2009 (500) Days of Summer > 250 310 345 489 1969 Midnight Cowboy > 250 818 502 490 1961 Breakfast at Tiffany’s > 250 210 802 491 2007 Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix > 250 147 837 492 2004 The Butterfly Effect > 250 303 428 493 2003 21 Grams > 250 410 500 494 2016 Doctor Strange > 250 287 556 495 2009 Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince > 250 160 846 496 1953 Stalag 17 > 250 1059 642 497 1962 What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? > 250 585 793 498 2007 Once > 250 463 487 499 2013 Mandariinid > 250 666 865 500
IMDb makes adjustments to its raw ratings but does not disclose its methodology. Therefore, these rankings — which start with the raw ratings — may not match a gender-weighted version of a list made by IMDb itself because we can’t re-create the site’s adjustments.
Source: IMDb
The top 100 largely includes films from the original list of 250, and the additions to the list — there are a lot of best picture winners among the newbies — appear mainly in the back half of the 250.
Attempting to reflect a target population is a common practice in many fields that use surveys. It’s not clear to me why movie rating sites don’t do it — or, at the least, why they don’t indicate that their scores are almost all based mostly on the opinions of male users.
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askpillow · 6 years
Text
I don’t even know how to start this update, so I’m just going to jump right into it. Life update under the cut. Trigger warning for talk of blood and miscarriage.
Back on Feb 8th, I found out I was pregnant. At that time, they were estimating that I was 19 weeks and 6 days along, and suffice to say, I was terrified. My boyfriend is having some legal troubles at the moment and so I couldn’t tell him because there was nothing he could do (also, his family would have driven me insane), I just recently got this job and am still trying t catch up on all of my bills, and after telling my mom, we were afraid to tell her boyfriend lest he kick us out.
So, that was a pretty stressful thing and I ended up doing my best to not think about it. I mean, I thought about it all the time, of course. I was busy trying to find an OB/GYN so I could maybe find out how far along I actually was and see if I could make this pregnancy work. I mean don’t get me wrong, babies freak me out and I didn’t really want kids in the first place, but there was no way in hell that I was going to give my kid up or anything else.
So I was trying to find an OB/GYN, but.. I ended up not even making it that far. On the 12th, I started having extremely painful cramps and light bleeding. I probably should have gone to the doctor right away, maybe something could have been done, and maybe not. But I didn’t. I went to work and did my best to relax and not stress out anymore. And it seemed to work for a little while.
Then we found out Monday, that we were supposed to get some ice Tuesday night. And since mom and I work at the same place and have the same schedule, we go into work together all the time. Anyway, come Tuesday night, we get a hotel room. And by some miracle, it was in the medical mile, right across from the hospital. I say miracle because of a few things.
My mom doesn’t walk very well and our room was on the second floor, and I, not even thinking about it because it was something I did all the time, carried all of our stuff up stairs and into our room. We were there for maybe an hour when I started just.. gushing blood. I mean, before, when I first started bleeding, I didn’t even spot a pad. Now I was filling one up within a couple minutes.
So my mom started the car and I grabbed all of the towels from the hotel and put them under me and we drove across the street to the hospital. Before, it hadn’t really hurt to move, but now every movement hurt. Including putting me in a wheelchair and wheeling me into a room. But, it had to be done to find out what was going on. So, wincing and whimpering with each movement, I suffered through and got wheeled into a room where I was allowed to change and sit down on a bed.
Everything else from there happened all at once and in slow motion. A doctor came in and I found out that my baby was in my vagina, amniotic sac still intact. I also found out that I was actually 23 weeks pregnant and the likelihood of my baby surviving was very, very slim. Had I been able to carry her just a while longer, there would have been a better chance of saving her.
From there, I was given fluids through an IV, had my blood drawn for labs and then wheeled into a delivery room. Again, everything hurt from all of the constant moving around. But I made it to the delivery room, crying in pain the whole time. I wasn’t in there for more than a couple minutes before there was someone else coming in to talk about the likelihood of my baby surviving and what I wanted to do if she did. From there, the anesthesiologist came in and gave me an epidural, which also hurt like hell. Also, he apparently went a little too deep, because once it kicked in, I couldn’t move my lower half at all or feel anything. Which was fine by me, because that meant that I wasn’t hurting anymore.
However, as I learned a little while later, a major side effect of getting an epidural is a drop in blood pressure. And for me apparently, they had a very hard time bringing my blood pressure back up to normal levels. To the point in fact, that at one point, after coming to because I needed to puke [because apparently I started dozing off], they mentioned that there was finally some color coming back into my cheeks and lips. So after they got my blood pressure normalized, they attached a monitor to my arm and left me in there to rest.
Mind you, it was about 11pm when we arrived at the hospital and it was already Wednesday by the time I finally started to actually get some rest.
Anyway, around 8am Wednesday morning, I woke up and talked with my mom for a bit before a nurse came in. She was coming in to check on me and change the pads under me, because of all the bleeding I’d been doing. And as she lifted the blankets to check on the situation, she told me that we’d change the pads later, because the baby was halfway out.
At that point, everything started to move quickly again. Nurses and the doctor rushing back in and moving things around, shifting the blanket aside so they could see and telling me to push. One nurse grabbed a stethoscope and put it up to the baby, and that’s when I learned that she hadn’t made it. And I just...
I cried, but I also just nodded and didn’t say anything. I had known from the moment I found out that I was pregnant, that the baby wouldn’t survive. You see, my family has a long history of miscarriages and early births. My mom and her siblings were all born early, and my grandma had two miscarriages before my uncle Sam was born. My aunt never brought a baby home from the hospital because they were all born early and needed to be five pounds before she could take them home. My sister was born two weeks early, and my mom had two miscarriages between my sister and I. I was almost miscarried, because my mom started bleeding around four months, but we both managed to pull through, though I was still a month early. So.. I knew all of this, and wasn’t exactly surprised to learn that my little one didn’t make it.
That doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt though, even as cold as it sounds. I just.. I was trying to save myself from getting excited and keep my heart from getting shattered to pieces because I had all of this stuff for a baby I never got to bring home with me. So I cried, but I did my absolute damn best to stay calm through everything.
They cleaned her up, and asked me if I wanted to hold her for a while. I said no at first, so they put her in a crib and left the room for a bit. I just.. It’s not that I didn’t want to hold her immediately, I wanted to adjust to the idea that she was real and I wouldn’t be taking her home. And when the nurses came back in, I asked if I could hold her.
And my god guys, she was so tiny and perfect. I just... I wish she’d had more f a fighting chance.
I cried as I held her, and mom came over to see her. There wasn’t a lot of talk at that point, just us crying as we stared at her. And I remember thinking the whole time, I’m sorry baby girl. I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.
At some point, I gave her back to the nurses and they took her into another room and dressed her up and took some pictures. Mom went outside for some air, the sheets and pads under me got changed and so did my hospital gown. And I got told that I need to make a decision about what I wanted to do with my little one’s remains before I left the hospital. And I started crying all over again.
When mom came back in, she brought my sister and one of my cousins with her, and they were both already crying. Mom had stopped crying, and was actually kind of okay. And I, without even thinking, told them about the decision I had to make before I left. And everyone started crying again if they weren’t already. And I felt absolutely terrible, because I hadn’t meant to make my mom cry again, but I also just.. I didn’t know what to do. I mean, how do you react when someone tells you that you need to make a decision about what to do with your baby’s remains hardly an hour after they’re gone? I just. I couldn’t.
And not to drag this story out for two much longer, the day went on with people coming in and out and all of us doing our best just to get through the day. My aunt came and joined us at one point, and we all cried and talked some more. Eventually, we got the situation of what to do with my daughter’s remains figured out and my cousin took on the responsibility of calling them and setting everything up, for which I am very thankful for, because I couldn’t do it.
In all, I was there until about 4/5pm, waiting to find out if they were going to keep me overnight for observation [because of how much I’d bled] or what exactly was going to happen. Finally, I was discharged and allowed to go home, taking with me a few keepsakes. In a box, they had given me the dress they had dressed her in, the pictures they’d taken of her, and a necklace with her name and DOB on it.
So, my update is that I had a baby on Feb 21, 2018. A beautiful little girl that was 1lb 6oz and 12in long, who would have been just the absolute sweetest thing in the world had she lived. Her name is Alina Bear Cooper-Morrell.
And I’m not sure if this makes the whole situation better or worse, but I remembered that today, Feb 23, 2018 is the anniversary of my grandpa’s death. So at least my sweet baby girl isn’t up there alone. At least she got to meet one of the most important men in my life.
Take care of my baby for me, Grandpa. I love you both so much and I miss you.
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