#Karson Pound

[badmovieihave]

Bad movie I have Return to Me 2000

[depressed-sock]

Just figuring out some character stuff and oh look here’s some extra story to go with it!

...

It’s the silence that wakes him up. The extra sound of soft breathing that should fill the room is gone and it has his eyes snapping open fast enough to cause another dizzy spell to hit. Karson Shepard has lived long enough on the streets to know that silence is always a bad sign. Especially in this city, especially with a younger sibling who is too curious and too stubborn for their own good.

He doesn’t bother rushing to their bedding, the pile of blankets clearly empty and cold. How long have they been gone?

The fluttering of a sheet of paper catches his eye and he grabs for it before it can escape into another part of the empty building.

Karson, I made my choice.

Karson Shepard has known fear. He’s felt it most days as he’s tried his best to survive while keeping his sibling safe. But right now with a single sentence, he feels something he’s never quite felt before. A dread that seeps from his stomach to his spine and causes his heart to pound loud enough that it’s all he hears.

He runs. Down the stairs, his footsteps echo through the decrepit building and cause a stir amongst some of the other populace as he rushes past and out of the building. Someone yells out a question. He doesn’t hear it. Instead, he runs faster and faster. Towards the only destination, he knows his sibling had to have gone to.

The thing about being with the Reds is that they offered a sort of protection that was hard to find anywhere for two underage kids trying to stay out of the system. Karson got paid, got food, and got a place to stay that was safe.

A place he hasn’t been to in months.

Because the other thing about the Reds is that if they find someone with potential, they’re going to dig their claws in and never let go. Especially if that potential is not only smart enough to hack into multiple systems to change their ID but is also biotic. Like his younger sibling. His younger sibling who a few months ago, in a fit of rage, had thrown a full-grown man across the room hard enough to break his spine and kill him instantly.

And what’s worse is that their power has been growing since then. Not yet completely uncontrollable but it’s been slowly getting there. It'll be a cold day in hell before Karson ever lets anyone hurt his sibling. Even if it means burying a body where no one will find it, even if it means going into hiding, even if it means living back on the streets. Away from prying eyes.

But it couldn’t last. Not with the questions he keeps being asked by the Reds. Not with his sibling slowly growing more and more anxious. And therefore more often than not unintentionally using their powers. They needed control, they wanted control. They had begged him to help.

So with little choice left, he’d taken them to a black market surgeon. Wanting a way for his sibling to be able to have some control over their newly developing powers. The problem was getting a L3 implant that was not already documented by the government cost an arm and a leg. A cheaper L2 implant, on the other hand, was out of the question. The side effects could cost his sibling their life. In more ways than one.

They’d agreed to wait for Karson to earn enough money for the L3.

They had agreed.

But apparently, that agreement wasn’t enough. It wasn’t enough and now he might lose them anyway. Fuck.

He doesn’t keep track of how long it takes to get there or how close a couple of cars come to hitting him. All he knows is that his lungs burn and his legs shake as he slams into the clinic's door. To find a nearly empty office, completely cleared out with the exception of a figure lying in a bed across from him.

“Silas!” Karson moves, exhausted as he slumps onto the side of the bed. Hands immediately checking their pulse. Feeling a steady beat he sighs in relief and finally lets himself focus enough to take in the appearance of his sibling.

Their head is now shaved, with a bandage wrapped in a way that makes its purpose unmistakable. The implant already in place at the base of their skull.

Their eyes open slowly, sluggishly, and blinks as if they’re not truly awake and seeing the world. “Karson?’

“Hey,” he responds softly, shaking hands finding theirs. “Silas, you ok?”

“Yeah,” they mumble before their eyes slip closed again. “I’m glad you’re alive this time.” They add on as they drift off back to sleep.

…

The thing about Silas Shepard is that they know they're an absolute bastard. A bastard who should very much be dead twice over. They’re not though.

It’s a weird feeling to know that they should be dead. They get nightmares about it and can still feel all those phantom pains from when they first died.

Well, mostly pain. It’s not necessarily pain all the time. Sometimes it just feels like they can’t breathe. That no matter how hard they try their lungs won’t expand. Sometimes they just get cold and nothing they do can warm them up as they shiver uncontrollably.

Karson thinks it’s because of the L2 implant.

Silas knows it’s because they died in the vacuum of space. Died then revived, then dead again when they finished off the Reapers for good. Now they’re here, back at the start with no explanation of how or why this has happened.

Their best guess is that something in the universe hates them enough that it decided they needed to go through this hell another time around. Honestly, Silas can't really blame them considering how many people they've fucked over.

So in the face of having to relive everything over again, what better chance would they ever get to change what’s supposed to happen?

Silas never got the L2 in their first life. Karson had died because of it. An easy first change, fist fix, even though they had no way of knowing whether or not they would die during the surgery or from the implant. They didn’t die. Well, they haven't yet. No major side effects as far as they can tell but with their luck it’s just waiting around the corner to bite them in the ass.

They wouldn’t say the unknown of all this is exactly terrifying (not with how their life has been) but the complete and utter relief they’d felt when they had woken up to Karson at their side… It was unbelievably freeing. And after being yelled at by their long-dead brother they let themself have a moment to realize that everything might be alright this time around.

So here they sit. Glaring daggers at the water bottle that sits across from them.

It's an odd experience to have all of the knowledge of how their biotics work and none of the physical experience. They know how it's supposed to work but everything they do is a scale. Sometimes it's just too slow. A memetic movement they'd done all their life is no longer an ingrained muscle memory. So it doesn't react right away. It's an experience like working through sludge rather than cutting through water.

And sometimes there's just too much power behind it. The difference between an L2 and L3 is palpable when a memetic that's only supposed to lift flings the water bottle they're practicing on into the ceiling with a loud crack.

They wince at the sound, eyes focused on the water bottle as it drops back onto the ground. They need practice and time but they don't really have enough time to spare.

Not with the Reaper's on their way. Not with all the plans in their head that need to be put into action. The first and possibly the easiest major change will have to wait until Karson joins the military.

Which they know he will do. It was always his idea in the first place. And something about destiny also rings in their head. The galaxy needs a Commander Shepherd and Karson will fit that much better than they did.

Besides, Silas thinks they would fit much better as the Shadow Broker instead.

[bitcofun]

This is a viewpoint editorial by Bitcoms, a Bitcoiner and factor to Bitcoin Magazine. Source: Google Maps The British Backdrop Just days after the anachronistic phenomenon of the Queen's funeral service-- an unusual echo of Britain's long-lost royal may-- the pound sterling was up to an all-time dollar low A couple of years prior to Elizabeth II was crowned, a pound deserved more than $4 Soon after she was buried, a quid hardly purchased a dollar. Add in the steepest increase in gilt yields in living memory and double digit inflation-- greater than any other industrialized country-- and Britain's present monetary dilemma looks even worse than even the 2008 crisis. At that time the Chancellor might have been on the edge, however a minimum of he might still purchase himself a pint of beer for less than ₤ 1. Source: The Times Already well over ₤ 4 typically U.K.-wide, the cost of that pint looks set to climb up a lot even more: With the Bank of England currently going back to alleviating, inflation might well worsen prior to it improves. For us Brits, even drowning our griefs is ending up being ever more unaffordable. Across the world, when a regional currency keeps losing a great deal of worth, individuals are relying on Bitcoin. Regular inflation-ravaged people from Istanbul to Buenos Aires progressively utilize it to maintain buying power and negotiate with one another. Is something comparable about to take place in a G7 economy? On the face of it, this does not look impending in the U.K. From deceptive reports of devastating energy usage to intrinsic absence of worth to conflation with the cryptocurrecy gambling establishment, a lot of Britons gladly consume the mainstream media's anti-Bitcoin Kool-Aid. As an outcome, Brits are normally distrustful of bitcoin not simply as a possession however more particularly as cash. "How can it be cash if it's illegal tender? What's using cash nobody accepts?" And so on. Unsurprisingly, then, couple of merchants throughout the nation show the orange B. In my house city of almost 3 million occupants, I understand of just one singular bar where you can purchase a beer with bitcoin. Much for looking for solace with your satoshis-- Great Britain is a long method from mass adoption of bitcoin as a medium of exchange. Britain's Bitcoin Island But there is a bit of Britain bucking the larger pattern: the Isle of Man, house of the Manx, where a substantial variety of services currently accept payments in sats. How lots of? And why? The day after the Queen's funeral service, I went there with my old friend @bitcoinshire to learn, and to see if we might endure for a couple of days on absolutely nothing however Bitcoin. The Basics The Ellan Vannin Hotel. (Photograph by @bitcoms) The island's very first hotel to accept satoshis is the comfy Ellan Vannin, where they serve top-notch Manx kippers for breakfast and where we were the very first bitcoin-paying visitors. They just recently began accepting bitcoin, having actually discovered a growing number of orange sticker labels appearing in regional store windows. Their inspiration appears twofold: a belief in bitcoin as the future, in addition to the possibility of additional organization from Bitcoiner travelers like us. Karsons Pharmacy. (Photograph by @bitcoms) As @bitcoinshire had actually forgotten to bring a tooth brush, we walked up the hill to Karsons As far as we might collect from among the friendly pharmacists, the owner's interest in bitcoin was why they 'd begun to accept it a couple of weeks formerly. Eager to be valuable, she likewise recommended we invest a couple of more sats on influenza jabs. We nicely decreased. Street Kitchen. (Photograph by @bitcoms) Dropping back into town, we got some food at Street Kitchen, a lunchtime restaurant with a great choice of pan-Asian meals. Being British, we cleaned that down with a cup of tea at Froth, a neighboring cafe. Having actually been accepting Bitcoin for

a number of months, Froth now sees a little however constant stream of sats-paying consumers most weeks. So far so excellent: Using just Bitcoin, we 'd protected excellent shelter, been well fed and watered, and even kept ourselves tidy. It was now time to turn our attention to greater things. Moving Up Maslow's Hierarchy Rex Motors. (Photograph by @bitcoms) Once they've figured out the standard requirements of life, the important things we British generally desire next is a vehicle. We strolled out to Rex Motors, where after a couple of months bitcoin appears well ingrained-- they even have double prices on their site They informed us they 'd currently offered many motors to residents who had actually selected Rex even if they accept Bitcoin. We especially liked the appearance of their British eminence marques, however sadly a Jaguar or a Bentley was beyond our scheduled budget plan for the journey. Paying for completely pulled pints in the Thirsty Pigeon. (Photograph by @bitcoms) Spitting plumes after the walk back, we fixed to the Thirsty Pigeon, a standard British boozer where cordial barmaids pull ideal pints of cask-conditioned finest bitter. Standard other than for the reality they take Bitcoin, naturally. Just a few backyards away, Bottle Monkey has a more progressive choice of beers for usage on and off the properties. Their factors for accepting Bitcoin stay unidentified due to the fact that "Chief Monkey" wasn't around, however the genial "Squirrel Monkey" was on hand to offer us some outstanding New England IPAs and stouts for satoshis. Buying beer in Bottle Monkey. (Photograph by @bitcoms) At dinnertime, we didn't just get a warm welcome from the co-owner of pizza and pasta joint Monapoli-- we got an extensive conversation about Bitcoin and the future of cash. They are keeping the bitcoin they take instead of transforming it into pounds, as are the next day's breakfast healthy smoothie place Freshly Squeezed, where they've been accepting sats for 6 months and a reasonable couple of Bitcoiners can be found in many days. This HODLing method is a clever technique-- a passive, fee-saving and low-hassle cousin of dollar-cost averaging for organizations. Monapoli. (Photograph by @bitcoms) Everywhere we went and whichever payment service we utilized, the Lightning Network was constantly rock-solid reputable. Every deal worked very first time without a drawback, and near immediately, a minimum of as fast and as easy to use as the typical tap-and-pay standard financing approaches we Brits tend to utilize when paying with fiat. Why Are The Manx Embracing Bitcoin? After a takeaway lunch from Timeout, it was clear that being a bitcoin-only traveler on this British Isle is a breeze. Little marvel: With numerous lots of merchants currently accepting sats and a population of just 86,000, the island is even more congenial to Bitcoiners than the mainland. Why is this? Some Brits presume the Isle of Man's tax program, which is more generous than in the majority of Britain, makes accepting Bitcoin much easier or more appealing. This does not truly stand up to examination-- for example, merchants on the island still require to charge and account for VAT on deals simply as they do on the British mainland Others believe it needs to be a down to a city government plan, however it isn't: while the Manx authorities are normally favorable towards innovation and development, and might well see Bitcoin as part of that, there is no particular effort in location. Others recommend it has something to do with laxer regional banking guidelines, which need to be more open towards bitcoin organizations. This does not hold water either: while the majority of merchants we spoke with usage regional Bitcoin exchange Coincorner and its ingenious Bolt tap-and-pay Lightning card, this does not appear to be materially various from merchants on the mainland utilizing the very same Coincorner services. Based on our discussions, the greatest

chauffeur to Bitcoin adoption has actually been the unbiased entrepreneurial spirit of Manx merchants and their desire to form their own monetary future. A good concentration of regional Bitcoiners may be assisting. Furthermore, the continual interest and effort of the Coincorner group in informing and onboarding regional merchants has actually plainly played an essential function. The outcome is now a grass-roots, bottom-up Bitcoin neighborhood, bootstrapped from absolutely nothing. What the Manx are developing here looks genuine and long lasting. Sure, it's early days, and there are some spaces-- an orange B in a grocer's window or on the side of a bus would be a welcome addition. The reality stays Bitcoin is now securely developed as an operating medium of exchange in a lively part of the world's 6th biggest economy What Might This Mean For The Rest Of Britain? The Isle of Man might look conventional, however mainland Britain is more stuck in the financial past. ( Photograph by @bitcoms) The Manx Bitcoin neighborhood might be little, however the island is currently among the leading areas in Europe to negotiate with your satoshis. And there's no legal or useful obstacle to comparable levels of penetration on the British mainland. Bitcoin organizations like Coincorner and companies like Bridge2Bitcoin are currently working towards simply that, putting in the tough backyards on the ground to construct mainland merchant adoption. Simply as on the Isle of Man, there is the exact same engaging case for merchants throughout the U.K.-- the possibility of additional Bitcoiner company; lower deal charges compared to TradFi payment cards; and instantaneous last settlement, not days or weeks later on similar to many TradFi suppliers. But it isn't just merchants who stand to take advantage of embracing Bitcoin. With the worth of sterling falling faster than ever in the previous half century, every Briton must think about the benefits of utilizing tough cash which inflation will not take. When the Queen's picture initially appeared on decimalised sterling banknotes in the early 1970 s, a pint of beer expense 13 cent By January 2016, when Lightning Labs was established to establish Bitcoin's immediate payment network, a pint had actually increased to ₤ 3.48, or about one hundredth of a Bitcoin. Simply 6 years of primarily so-called low inflation later on, that pint is currently a 5th more pricey in pounds, however fifty times less expensive in satoshis. There are no assurances, however taking a look at sterling's woeful past and present efficiency, the pound in your pocket looks a bad bet. Gradually, banking on Bitcoin-- a minimum of to some degree-- is a lot more appealing proposal. For both British merchants and their clients, presenting Bitcoin for daily deals will work marvels for such a shift. The Isle of Man is currently revealing the rest of Britain the course to such a monetary future. Can British mainlanders likewise move with the times, or will they remain stuck in the financial past? This is a visitor post by Bitcoms. Viewpoints revealed are totally their own and do not always show those of BTC Inc or Bitcoin Magazine. Read More

[lasclwolf]

Shahrzad series part 15

#SHAHRZAD SERIES PART 15 SERIES#

We systematically searched six databases including Google Scholar, Scopus, PubMed, Web of science, Ovid, and EMBASE for all published articles from 1 January 2020 until 20 April 2020 using the following Medical Subject Heading terms (MESH terms): We performed this systematic review and meta‐analysis based on Preferred Reporting Items for Systematic Reviews and Meta‐Analyses (PRISMA) guidelines (Moher et al., 2009), and our study protocol is submitted to PROSPERO (ID: CRD42020184456). In this systematic review and meta‐analysis, we assessed the CNS manifestations in COVID‐19 cases.Ģ.1. Therefore, awareness of the different aspects of the short‐ and long‐term effects of this virus on the central nervous system could decently guide scientists. shows the prevalence of the CNS presentations such as dizziness, headache, impaired consciousness, acute cerebrovascular disease, ataxia, and seizure (Mao et al., 2020). Furthermore, a large observational study carried out by Mao et al. Several case reports have indicated the presence of various CNS complications, including encephalitis, stroke, meningitis, and encephalopathy in COVID‐19 patients (Co et al., 2020 Filatov et al., 2020 Moriguchi et al., 2020 Zhou, Zhang, et al., 2020). However, a growing number of COVID‐19 patients are presenting with different combinations of the central nervous system (CNS) manifestations (Asadi‐Pooya & Simani, 2020 Mao et al., 2020 Montalvan et al., 2020). Most cases of COVID‐19 have shown respiratory symptoms ranging from cough to dyspnea and respiratory failure as well as the typical signs and symptoms of infection such as fever and fatigue (Cascella et al., 2020 Chen, Zhou, et al., 2020 Wang, Hu, et al., 2020 Young et al., 2020). Severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS‐CoV‐2) is a zoonotic pathogen and can transmit from infected animals (such as bats and snakes) to humans eventually leading to epidemics and pandemics through human‐to‐human transmission (Hassan et al., 2020 Mackenzie & Smith, 2020). Hence, the COVID‐19 outbreak was officially considered as a Public Health Emergency of International Concern (PHEIC) by the World Health Organization (WHO) Emergency Committee (Mackenzie & Smith, 2020 WHO, 2020). This new pandemic rapidly spread worldwide, and an increasing number of infected cases and deaths have been reported globally (Jiang et al., 2020 Sohrabi et al., 2020). 7, in the Plaza for Art after Dark.At the end of December 2019, a novel respiratory syndrome, known as COVID‐19, was reported in Wuhan city, Hubei province, China. The city said SHAHRZAD will be attending an opening celebration for the installation on Saturday, Aug. “We are so grateful to have supported five cultural nonprofits and to have worked with the talent at local company, Karson Butler Events, to create unique installations for the community to enjoy all summer long."

#SHAHRZAD SERIES PART 15 SERIES#

“This Plaza Pop-Up series has exceeded all expectations,” said Molly Cano, City of SLO Tourism Manager. The SLO County Arts Council tapped SHAHRZAD to create the display as part of the city-sponsored featured cultural nonprofit. "Untitled VI" is the final installation of the Plaza Pop-Up Series. “But as community members share space with the installation, I hope our energies meld and for a moment, we can live like children, curiously together.“ “Before a person enters the space, these structures are just symbols of my artistry - defined by a Persian-ness, a Zoroastrian superstition, and an obsession with the internet,” said SHAHRZAD. SHAHRZAD said the pieces are meant to express the collective contradiction of emotions experienced over the past year and a half of the pandemic. All of the pieces range from four to six feet high and are made up of industrial materials like 600 pounds of hydrocal and 1,000 feet of quarter-inch steel rod. The six sculptures include a hand, flame, "evil eye", squiggle, rainbow and smiley face.

[hpowellsmith]

it can even just be the descriptions from the book, i dont mind haha and im also really curious how tall everyone is 🥰

I have zero sense of height but here they are from shortest to tallest:

Short:

Max (small in size, large in voice)

Blaise (10 pounds of grouch in a 5 pound bag)

Rosario (probably wears heels so seems taller than they are)

Mid height:

Delacroix (mid height but hunches)

Florin (personal space invader; seems taller than they are)

Freddie (can jump to get to the top shelves)

Tall:

Auguste (tall with extremely good posture)

Hartmann (tall with extremely tense posture)

Karson (tall, hench)

Gonzalez (also hench but more sprawling, takes up three person's worth of seats on a couch, somehow their feet are always in the way)

[starry-eyed-simss]

She linked her arm through Karson’s and steered him in the direction of the hallway. Much to her relief, Orange didn’t follow them, and once they were out of sight, she dropped her arm immediately. Karson stepped back as if she were on fire.

Karson: Why did you—

Iorie: It wasn’t for your benefit.

He was seething now, but so was she. He bared his teeth as she reluctantly grabbed his arm once more, pulling him forward. His voice was loud as he said,

Karson: Get your—

Iorie: *hisses* Don’t, they’ll hear. 

Karson snapped his arm back, his fingers curling into fists. He was so angry they shook, but it didn’t scare her. Even as her heart began to pound, he didn’t scare her. 

Not this time. 

His eyes were on Orange’s watch in her hands, and she covered it in her palm, the broken edges of the watch’s face pressing into her skin.

Iorie: If you don’t walk with me right now I’ll make a scene.

It was a bluff, but one he bought.

Karson: Fine.

[askjoshuafreeman]

1) Aww, thank anon! I put a lot of thought into picking my names 2) Pausing our battle of the ocean nerds to say hell yeah I got pets! Two dogs, Clara and Karson. Clara is a spoiled little princess and waaay too smart for her own good and Karson is a shy sweetheart who still thinks he’s a puppy even though he’s like a hundred and fifteen pounds. Do plants count as pets? If so a have a succulent named Donnie. They are a plant so they don’t exactly do much

[foreversimmers]

“Anyone home?” Genevive called from the front door as soon as the couple set foot into the silentious living room.

“Looks like we have the house to ourselves,” Ianthe giggled, squeezing the smaller woman’s hand tight in her own, her eyes alight with flirtatious wonder. Gen stifled a laugh as she leaned closer to her wife, the air in the house still blazing as it was outside. She sighed into Ian’s shoulder, her smile taking up her whole face, the smell of lavender detergent filling her nose.

“Ev texted me earlier. I thought she was home,” Gen puzzled, breaking the spell Ianthe thought had festered between them, her own smile fading as she looked over to the stairs. As if on cue, the floorboards overhead began to creek with the weight of an on comer, before feet began to pound down the staircase. Everlie emerged from the shadows, her head lowered to the floor so neither parent could see her face, but right off the bat they knew something was wrong. Everlie was tremoring, her hands balled up into fists so tight her nails broke through her fragile skin, her face a glisten with both sweat and tears. She didn’t look up at the two women, whose face had fallen flat.

“Everlie? Honey, what’s wrong?” Ianthe asked, sharing a concerned look with Genevive. The young girl’s fists tightened, her breathing hitching at the sound of her mother’s voice. She bared her teeth, most of her face hidden behind her long and growing bangs. She muttered something so quiet it disappeared the second it left her lips.

“What? What did you say?” Gen asked her, daring to take a step forward, but Everlie was already jerking backwards, her eyes coming up to lock onto the two woman standing before her. Her eyes were bloodshot, swollen, and filled with unruly tears that trailed down her inflamed cheeks. She shook her head, her lips swollen and cracked from her constantly biting them. The mothers stood speechless and in awe of their youngest daughters current state.

“W-When were you going to tell me I was adopted?” Her voice was hoarse, but there was an edge to every syllable, cutting deep into Gen and Ianthe’s hearts, jabbing and ripping them apart. Ianthe audibly let out a gasp, that if things were different, would have made Everlie burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of it. Genevive, on the other hand, stayed as still as a statue, her face in a mix between horror and surprise. They both stared at their little girl with no idea on what to say or how to act. Everlie was still shaking her head, her whole body seeming to move with the momentum. “You lied.” She spit, locking her jaw. “You lied to me, my whole life…why? WHY!?”

Genevive was the first to act. She hitched her shoulders back and took in a deep breathe to relax her own shaking that had sudden come over her. Her face had pulled back, no longer in shock, lips a tight line, eyes narrowing in on her daughter. She went to speak but Everlie cut her off, words ice.

“You told me I was yours. You told me you gave birth to me—just like Flynn, just like Lakynn and Karson. You told me I was yours! You lied to me!” She had taken on a hysterical whine to her voice with every sentence.

“You are ours, Everlie. This doesn’t change that.” Gen stated matter-of-factly, nodding back to her wife, who now had tears in her eyes. “Blood or not, you and Jonah are our children.”

Previous | Next

[wausaupilot]

Congratulations, to the Oertel family! Aspirus Wausau Hospital Korey and Kelsey Oertel announce the birth of their son Owen Karson, born at 3:33 a.m. May 15, 2019. Owen weighed 7 pounds, 11 ounces.

[ebaycurious]

Vintage MTI (Movie Tie-In) SIGNED by Guy Gabaldon (the Marine war hero and subject of the 1960 film), starring Jeffrey Hunter, David Janssen, Vic Damone, George Takei, Patricia Owens, Richard Eyer [as young Guy Gabaldon ("The 7th Voyage of Sinbad," "The Invisible Boy," "The Desperate Hours"), John Larch ("Dirty Harry," "The Amityville Horror," "Play Misty For Me"), Bill Williams ("The Adventures of Kit Karson"), Reiko Sato ("Flower Drum Song," "The Ugly American") & Miiko Taka ("Sayonara").

The book also includes a typed press release that was attached by paper clip inside the book, likely by the original owner Ivan Maule, to whom it was signed by Gabaldon.

From Wikipedia: Guy Louis Gabaldon (March 22, 1926 – August 31, 2006) was a United States Marine who, at age 18, captured or persuaded to surrender over two thousand Japanese soldiers and civilians during the battles for Saipan and Tinian islands in 1944 during World War II. Though Gabaldon was recommended for the Medal of Honor, he received the Silver Star, which was upgraded by the Marine Corps to the Navy Cross in 1960.

In 1960, a friend of Gabaldon's with Hollywood connections influenced the industry to make a movie about Gabaldon's version of events on Saipan called Hell to Eternity. He was called 'Gabby' by his friends, and was an outspoken member of right-wing political organizations. In 1964, he unsuccessfully ran for US Congressman in his Southern California district. In 1990, he authored a book entitled, Saipan: Suicide Island.

Gabaldon was born in Los Angeles, California. Gabaldon, who was of Mexican descent, was one of seven children. He was raised in East Los Angeles and, as a ten-year-old, he helped his family by shining shoes on Skid Row. Gabaldon became a member of a multi-ethnic gang known as the "Moe Gang". At age 12, he moved out of his home to live with the Nakano family, which was of Japanese-American heritage and whom he considered his extended family. He attended language school every day with their children and learned to speak Japanese. He also learned about their customs and culture.

The United States considered the possibility of a full scale invasion of the Japanese mainland but later decided that such a feat would be costly, with an estimated one million American casualties. The capture of Saipan was considered essential for the establishment of airfields which would accommodate the B-29 Superfortress bombers to be used for the planned invasion. On June 15, 1944, an armada of 535 ships, carrying 127,570 U.S. military personnel which included Marines from the 2nd and 4th Marine Divisions, began the invasion of Saipan. Japanese soldiers seldom surrendered during World War II and, as the American military invasion went badly for the Japanese, they were ordered by their superiors on Saipan to kill seven American Marines or soldiers for every soldier they lost, or commit suicide.

According to Gabaldon, he began taking and bringing in prisoners the night of the first day that he arrived on Saipan.

"The first night I was on Saipan, I went out on my own...I always worked on my own, and brought back two prisoners using my backstreet Japanese."

Gabaldon was reprimanded by his superior officers, and threatened with a court-martial for leaving his post. However, according to him the next night he went out and did it again. He carefully approached a cave, shot the enemy guards outside, moved off to one side of the cave, and yelled in Japanese, "You're surrounded and have no choice but to surrender. Come out, and you will not be killed! I assure you will be well-treated. We do not want to kill you!"

The next morning he says he returned with 50 Japanese prisoners. As a result, Gabaldon was permitted by his commanding officer to act as a "lone wolf" operator.

The next day, on July 8, Gabaldon captured two more enemy guards. He convinced one of them to return to his cave, with an offering of surrender. Shortly thereafter, a Japanese officer showed up. After speaking to Gabaldon, the officer accepted the conditions of surrender—and over eight hundred Japanese soldiers and civilians surrendered to Gabaldon, who turned them over to the U.S. military authorities. For his exploits, according to Gabaldon, he became known as The Pied Piper of Saipan.

Gabaldon continued to capture more Japanese people on Tinian. While back on Saipan fighting Japanese guerrillas still on the island, he was seriously wounded in an enemy machine gun ambush. Gabaldon claimed he was credited with the capture of approximately 1,500 Japanese soldiers and civilians on Saipan and Tinian and was recommended for the Medal of Honor by his commanding officer Captain John Schwabe, who noted that Gabaldon single-handedly captured more than ten times the number of prisoners taken by legendary Medal of Honor recipient, Sgt. Alvin C. York, in World War I. Despite this recommendation, Gabaldon was awarded a Silver Star Medal.

From IMDB: * The real Guy Gabaldon--unlike Jeffrey Hunter, the tall Anglo actor who played him--was Chicano and only 5'4", 130 pounds. He enlisted in the Marines after Pearl Harbor at age 17. Even though he captured more enemy soldiers single-handedly than anyone else, including WW I hero Sgt. Alvin C. York, he was not awarded the Medal of Honor, as York was.

* Several hundred veterans of the Japanese Imperial Army took part in the re-creation of the Battle of Saipan, which was filmed on Okinawa. In addition, about 500 U.S. Marines from Camp Hansen on the island were used in this film.

* There were initially many objections to the striptease dances done by Famika and Sheila, and both were cut considerably in reaction to those objections.

* The screen rights for Guy Gabaldon's story were initially purchased by Gramercy Pictures the day after he appeared on the This Is Your Life (1952) broadcast of June 19, 1957.

* In the film, Guy Gabaldon's adoptive Japanese-American family the Unes is taken from their home in Los Angeles and sent to an internment camp farther inland for the duration of the war. In reality, actor George Takei--who played George Une--was five yeas old at the beginning of World War II and he and his family were taken out of their home and sent to an internment camp in Arkansas for the duration of the war.

* Opening credits: This is the story of an immortal fighting man of World War II. Many who never even knew Guy Gabaldon are alive at the present time because of him. Though this United States Marine's deeds came into history's sharp focus on the bloodied hills of Saipan, his story starts in the melting pot of East Los Angeles during the great depression of the early Thirties.

Title: Hell to Eternity Author: Edward S. Aarons Publisher: Gold Medal 1023 Cover Illustration: Barye Phillips Paperback Original (PBO) Printing: 1st, August 1960 AVAILABLE FOR A SHORT TIME HERE

[mitchbeck]

CRAWFORD: P-BRUINS POUND PACK 5-2 IN MONDAY MAKEUP GAME

BY: Bob Crawford, Hartford Wolf Pack Providence, RI, January 21, 2019 – Paul Carey scored a hat trick Monday at the Dunkin’ Donuts Center Providence, to lead the Providence Bruins to a 5-2 win over the Hartford Wolf Pack in a holiday matinee. John Gilmour had a goal and an assist for the Wolf Pack, who fell behind 2-0 in the first period and trailed 3-0 before coming back to within one goal.  Karson Kuhlman had a goal and an assist for Providence, and Connor Clifton added an empty-net goal and an assist. “Obviously, to be down 2-0 on the road, in a tough building to win in, is not an easy task to overcome,” Wolf Pack head coach Keith McCambridge said.  “We were able to get back, with two quick goals, make it a close game, but then going into the third period, the first six minutes, we’re (penalty) killing for four of them.  That doesn’t give you a chance to at least tie that game up.  Overall, I thought that Providence, the chances that they created, they buried, and the ones that we did, we weren’t able to finish on.” The Bruins’ two first-period scores came within a span of 30 seconds. Carey, a former New York Ranger, opened the scoring at 8:56.  After the puck slid through the feet of Wolf Pack defenseman Libor Hajek, Carey grabbed it at the left side of the slot a snapped in through the pads of Wolf Pack goaltender Dustin Tokarski (23 saves). Then, at 9:26, Kuhlman made it a 2-0 Providence advantage.  Gilmour started to carry the puck up the middle in the defensive zone but had it get away from him.  Jordan Szwarz took control for Providence and set Kuhlman up with an open net for the finish. The Bruins upped their lead to 3-0 at 5:33 of the second period, on Carey’s second of the game.  Clifton moved down the right-wing boards in the Hartford end and slipped past a hip check attempt by Ryan Lindgren.  He then fed the puck across the middle to Carey, who slammed it in. The Wolf Pack would respond quickly to that goal, though, with a pair of their own in just over two minutes. At 6:20, only 1:47 after Carey’s goal, Gilmour got the Wolf Pack on the board with his 12th of the season.  Connor Brickley banked the puck off of the right-wing boards in the Bruin zone and got back to it.  He sent a backhand shot on goal that Providence goaltender Zane McIntyre (23 saves) stopped, but Gilmour, attacking the net from the left side, fired the rebound in. Then, just 2:12 later at 8:32, Vinni Lettieri brought Hartford to within one.  Gilmour again had a big role in the play, as he carried the puck behind the net to the right side, before feeding it out to Lettieri at the top of the circles.  He released a lightning-quick one-timer that cleanly beat McIntyre. That was the extent of the Wolf Pack’s offense, though, and, after Hartford was forced to kill two penalties in the first five minutes of the third, Carey completed the hat trick at 11:22. Trent Frederic was able to work the puck away from Gilmour on the right side in the Wolf Pack end, and it came to Carey at the side of the slot.  Tokarski got a piece of Carey’s shot, but could not keep it out of the net. Clifton then iced the game with an open-net goal with 1:40 left after Szwarz broke up a Hartford pass just inside the Providence line. The Wolf Pack’s next action is a home game this Wednesday night, January 23, with the Springfield Thunderbirds returning to the XL Center for a 7:00 PM contest.  That is another chance to take advantage of the Wolf Pack’s “Click It or Ticket Family Value Pack”, which includes two tickets, two hot dogs and two sodas, all for just $40. Tickets for all 2018-19 Wolf Pack home games are on sale now at the Agera Energy Ticket Office at the XL Center, online at hartfordwolfpack.com and by phone at (877) 522-8499.  Tickets purchased in advance for kids 12 or younger start at just $13 each, and all tickets will have a $3 day-of-game increase. Season ticket information for the Wolf Pack’s 2018-19 AHL season can be found online at hartfordwolfpack.com.  To speak with a representative about all of the Wolf Pack’s many attractive ticketing options, call (855) 762-6451, or click here to request more info. Hartford Wolf Pack 2 at Providence Bruins 5 Monday, January 21, 2019 - Dunkin' Donuts Center Hartford     0 2 0 - 2 Providence 2 1 2 - 5 1st Period-1, Providence, Carey 7 (Senyshyn, Breen), 8:56. 2, Providence, Kuhlman 9 (Szwarz, Hughes), 9:26. Penalties-Brickley Hfd (high-sticking), 1:45; Frederic Pro (hooking), 11:37; Lindgren Hfd (unsportsmanlike conduct), 14:16; Senyshyn Pro (slashing), 14:16. 2nd Period-3, Providence, Carey 8 (Clifton), 5:33. 4, Hartford, Gilmour 12 (Brickley, Butler), 6:20. 5, Hartford, Lettieri 11 (Gilmour, Gettinger), 8:32. Penalties-Koppanen Pro (elbowing), 12:18. 3rd Period-6, Providence, Carey 9 (Frederic), 11:22. 7, Providence, Clifton 4 (Szwarz, Kuhlman), 18:20 (EN). Penalties-Hajek Hfd (interference), 1:13; Meskanen Hfd (tripping), 4:38; Breen Pro (tripping), 7:00. Shots on Goal-Hartford 8-11-6-25. Providence 13-9-6-28. Power Play Opportunities-Hartford 0 / 3; Providence 0 / 3. Goalies-Hartford, Tokarski 10-5-2 (27 shots-23 saves). Providence, McIntyre 14-8-3 (25 shots-23 saves). A-8,487 Referees-Conor O'Donnell (41), Beaudry Halkidis (48). Linesmen-Jack Millea (23), Todd Whittemore (70). Read the full article

[dichoticwomanism]

Births 2/9/18

Name, Karson David. Weight, 8 pounds, 12 ounces. Second child, first son. Mrs. Yamnitz is the former Kelly Steinbecker, daughter of David and Doris Steinbecker of Perryville. She is a physical therapist with Therapy Solutions. Yamnitz is the son of David Yamnitz of Perryville and the late Karen Yamnitz. from Google Alert - Physical Therapist http://ift.tt/2nOg76p

[reviewithowtoit]

Apple iPad Pro Review 2020 - Best Overall Tablet USA Prices - https://amzn.to/32dNyCG Fire HD 10 Tablet Review 2020 - Best Cheap Tablet - best budget tablet 2020 USA Prices - https://amzn.to/3bNbnWl Samsung Galaxy Tab S6 Review 2020 - Best Android Tablet 2020 - best tablets for kids USA Prices - https://amzn.to/326VHZx Huawei MediaPad M5 Pro Review 2020 - best tablet 2020 under 500 - best tablet to buy in 2020 USA Prices - https://amzn.to/2HCiymn Samsung Galaxy Tab S5e Review 2020 - best budget android tablet 2020 - Best Tablet With Keyboard USA Prices - https://amzn.to/2P9429B All-New Fire HD 10 Tablet (10.1" 1080p full HD display, 64 GB) – Plum 10.1" 1080p full HD display; 32 or 64 GB of internal storage (add up to 512 GB with microSD) Now 30% faster thanks to the new 2.0 GHz octa-core processor and 2 GB of RAM Longer battery life—Up to 12 hours of reading, browsing the web, watching the video, and listening to music Hands-free with Alexa 2 MP front and rear-facing cameras with 720p HD video recording Dual-band enhanced Wi-Fi Samsung Galaxy Tab S6 10.5", 128GB WiFi Tablet Cloud Blue - SM-T860NZBAXAR Introducing Samsung Galaxy Tab S6 Imagine a more personal PC experience—without a PC. Meet the Galaxy Tab S6, the ultra-slim 2-in-1 that performs like a laptop with the mobility of a tablet. Get more done as you switch seamlessly from app to app, the task to task. Go all out with an intuitive S Pen that lets you work, create and edit with ease. When it’s time to kick back, you can stream shows and games on a spectacular screen with cinematic sound. And make it all happen with a Fast-Charging battery that keeps up with you all day. Huawei MediaPad M5 Pro Tablet with 10.8" 2.5D Display, Octa-Core, Quick Charge, Quad Harman Kardon-Tuned Speakers, WiFi Only, 4GB+64GB, Champagne Gold Huawei Media Pad M5 Review 2020, built for entertainment. The 2K Larvie display and Harman Karson tuned speakers allow you to immerse yourself in all your entertainment wants. The M5's robust performance is fueled by a Kirin 960 processor, excellent for gaming. With a long-lasting battery and quick charge capability, enjoy hours of your favorite entertainment. The sleek design and thin unit-body, allow you to take the M5 anywhere - work, home or play. Samsung SM-T720NZKAXAR Galaxy Tab S5e 64 GB WiFi Tablet Black (2019) Weighing in at less than a pound, the incredibly slim Galaxy Tab S5e is perfect for your on the go life. Watch your favorite shows and movies come to life on a corner to corner 10. 5" Super AMOLED display. Plus, control lights, door locks, the thermostat, and other connected home devices right from your tablet with SmartThings. It’s everything you need, all on a thin and light Tab S5e you’ll never want to put down. ============================================= Disclaimer ============================================= Portions of footage found in this video are not original content produced by Review It & How To It. Portions of stock footage of products were gathered from multiple sources including, manufactures, fellow creators and various other sources. This video contains affiliate links. I earn through amazon associates from qualifying purchases. by Review It & How To It!

[theconservativebrief]

Vox Sentences is your daily digest for what’s happening in the world. Sign up for the Vox Sentences newsletter, delivered straight to your inbox Monday through Friday, or view the Vox Sentences archive for past editions.

A teary Ford and Kavanaugh testify before the Senate Judiciary Committee; a new study has dire predictions for killer whales.

Erin Schaff-Pool/Getty Images

Christine Blasey Ford and Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh testified before the Senate Judiciary Court about an alleged incident of sexual assault on Thursday. Ford and Kavanaugh recounted their own memories of the incident through opening statements and questioning from Democrats and prosecutor Rachel Mitchell, who asked questions for Republicans. [ABC / Kendall Karson and Cheyenne Haslett]

In a soft and wavering voice, Ford delivered a teary opening statement, which lasted just under 25 minutes, about how she was “terrified” to appear before the committee. Her description of the night that of the alleged assault echoed what she said in interviews and in her initial letter to her Congress member. [Bloomberg / Alex Wayne]

Ford also asserted during questioning that she was “100 percent” certain it was Kavanaugh who assaulted her by using her expertise in psychology and explaining “basic memory functions” in scientific terms. [Vox / Dylan Scott]

During his opening statement and testimony, Kavanaugh spoke about how excellence in school as a young person was uncharacteristic of someone who would commit sexual assault, and implied it was the Clinton family who had set up the allegations. He appeared very emotional during the hearing, as he both teared up and lost his temper on numerous occasions. He also said that he had unfairly been put “through hell and then some” and that his reputation is “totally and permanently destroyed.” [Guardian / Oliver Laughland]

Republicans on the committee portrayed the hearing as “a sham” that was used to smear someone who has “nothing to apologize for.” [NBC]

It’s unclear what Mitchell’s strategy in the hearing was. She questioned Ford about small details, including the minutiae of her travel, which seemed like a waste of time. But her questions for Kavanaugh could be of interest to Maryland prosecutors, who are likely deciding whether to pursue an investigation at this moment in time. [Atlantic / Emma Green]

To many observers, it seemed Kavanaugh’s testimony was often taken at face value; he simply had to deny the allegations. Meanwhile, Ford was forced to go to “great lengths to validate the allegations themselves.” [Vox / Li Zhou]

With the support of Republicans and President Trump, Kavanaugh has enjoyed a fair share of “himpathy”: the “sympathy powerful men often enjoy in cases of sexual assault.” [NYT / Kate Manne]

The news, but shorter, delivered straight to your inbox.

By signing up, you agree to our Privacy Policy and European users agree to the data transfer policy. For more newsletters, check out our newsletters page.

Half of the killer whale groups in the world are essentially “doomed” to go extinct within the next 30 to 50 years due to persistent chemical pollution, more specifically polychlorinated biphenyls (PCBs), according to a new study. [Guardian / Damian Carrington]

The PCBs are specifically dangerous because, aside from the general harm they cause, they also damage female whales’ ovaries and hinder their ability to give birth. [BBC / Jonathan Amos and Victoria Gill]

The PCBs enter a whale’s system by way of the food chain. Plankton, which are at the bottom of the chain, ingest the PCBs, and then the chemicals quickly work their way upward. [NYT / Karen Weintraub]

Companies were banned from producing PCBs worldwide in 2004. But they’re still present in the ocean because the compounds are so hard to break down. [Science / Elizabeth Pennisi]

An asteroid shaped like a skull, known as the “Death Comet,” will zip by Earth right around Halloween. [HuffPost / Ed Mazza]

The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission and the Tequesta Police Department had to use drones this week after a kangaroo named Storm went missing in the South Florida neighborhood. Storm is now safe and sound with her owner after she was found on Thursday afternoon. [AP]

Robert Mueller left the cave where he’s been investigating the Russia probe to get some tech support from Apple’s Genius Bar, according to a picture by a curious onlooker. [The Verge / Jacob Kastrenakes]

Coming in at 1,700 pounds, the now-extinct elephant bird has made a Pluto-esque comeback and officially been declared the largest bird that ever lived. [NYT / Douglas Quenqua]

“This interrogation of the trauma experienced by a single person feels, as it so often does, like a referendum for all.” [Alexandra Schwartz on the intensity felt by all women watching Christine Blasey Ford testify for the Senate Judiciary Committee / New Yorker]

Brett Kavanaugh is using a familiar playbook. [YouTube / Madeline Marshall and Liz Scheltens]

Sign up for The Weeds pop-up newsletter! Matt Yglesias dissects what’s really at stake in the 2018 midterms between now and Election Day.

An EPA children’s health official says Trump wants to “disappear” her office

Rosenstein’s job might be on the line, but Republicans still don’t want to protect the Mueller investigation

The rise, fall, and unlikely return of Murphy Brown, explained

The hypocritical moralizing of Bill Cosby

The appealing myth of the frugal billionaire

Original Source -> Vox Sentences: Ford testifies, Kavanaugh denies

via The Conservative Brief

[instapicsil3]

#Happiness appears to be an #albinocatfish for Karson Moye, 6, of Washington. Karson caught the second #albino of the day during the 48th Annual #ClydeWestFishingDerby on May 19, 2018 at #GlenOakLagoon. Albino catfish, along with 1,300 pounds of additional #catfish made the event a sure thing for most #fishermen. (@journalstar photo by #FredZwicky) #fish #fishofinstagram #fishing #fishingderby #glenoakpark #peoria #peoriaparkdistrict https://ift.tt/2IWYtcM

[newstfionline]

What happens to children who survive school shootings in America?

By John Woodrow Cox and Steven Rich, Washington Post, March 21, 2018

Thirteen at Columbine. Twenty-six at Sandy Hook. Seventeen at Marjory Stoneman Douglas.

Over the past two decades, a handful of massacres that have come to define school shootings in this country are almost always remembered for the students and educators slain. Death tolls are repeated so often that the numbers and places become permanently linked.

What those figures fail to capture, though, is the collateral damage of this uniquely American crisis. Beginning with Columbine in 1999, more than 187,000 students attending at least 193 primary or secondary schools have experienced a shooting on campus during school hours, according to a year-long Washington Post analysis. This means that the number of children who have been shaken by gunfire in the places they go to learn exceeds the population of Eugene, Ore., or Fort Lauderdale, Fla.

Many are never the same.

School shootings remain extremely rare, representing a tiny fraction of the gun violence epidemic that, on average, leaves a child bleeding or dead every hour in the United States. While few of those incidents happen on campuses, the ones that do have spread fear across the country, changing the culture of education and how kids grow up.

Every day, threats send classrooms into lockdowns that can frighten students, even when they turn out to be false alarms. Thousands of schools conduct active-shooter drills in which kids as young as 4 hide in darkened closets and bathrooms from imaginary murderers.

“It’s no longer the default that going to school is going to make you feel safe,” said Bruce D. Perry, a psychiatrist and one of the country’s leading experts on childhood trauma. “Even kids who come from middle-class and upper-middle-class communities literally don’t feel safe in schools.”

Samantha Haviland understands the waves of fear created by the attacks as well as anyone.

At 16, she survived the carnage at Columbine High, a seminal moment in the evolution of modern school shootings. Now 35, she is the director of counseling for Denver’s public school system and has spent almost her entire professional life treating traumatized kids. Yet, she’s never fully escaped the effects of what happened to her on that morning in Littleton, Colo. The nightmares, always of being chased, lingered for years. Even now, the images of children walking out of schools with their hands up is too much for her to bear.

On Saturday, some of Haviland’s students, born in the years after Columbine, will participate in the Denver “March For Our Lives” to protest school gun violence. In Washington, students from Parkland, Fla.--still grieving the friends and classmates they lost last month--will lead a rally of as many as 500,000 people in the nation’s capital.

“They were born and raised in a society where mass shootings are a thing,” she said, recalling how much her community and schoolmates blamed themselves for the inexplicable attack by Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold. “These students are saying, ‘No, no--these things are happening because you all can’t figure it out.’ They’re angry, and I think that anger is appropriate. And I hope they don’t let us get away with it.”

In analyzing school shootings, The Post found an average of 10 school shootings per year since Columbine, with a low of five in 2002 and a high of 15 in 2014. Less than three months into 2018, there have been 11 shootings, already making this year among the worst on record.

At least 129 kids, educators, staff and family members have been killed in assaults during school hours, and another 255 have been injured.

Schools in at least 36 states and the District have experienced a shooting, according to The Post’s count. They happen in big cities and small towns, in affluent suburbs and rural communities. The precise circumstances in each incident differed, but what all of them had in common was the profound damage they left behind.

Javon Davies, a sixth-grader at a Birmingham middle school, came home and told his mom, Mariama, that he and his classmates had spent the day in lockdown.

Javon, who is 12, had heard about Parkland. He and a friend suspected that they, too, might die at their school, so each of the boys wrote a will.

“Mom,” the other sixth-grader wrote in print letters, “I want to give my friend Javon every thing that I own that includes the xbox and games and controllers and all that comes with it.”

In Javon’s instructions, he listed his PlayStation 4, his Xbox 360 and his dirt bike.

“I love you my whole Family you mean the most to me,” he wrote. “You gave me the clothes on my back, you fed me, and you were always by my side.”

On the morning of May 15, 2017, Gage Meche, then 7, walked into his first-grade class and hung up his blue Nike backpack, then turned around. On the floor in front of him was a gun. It had just fallen out of another boy’s bag, and when a girl Gage had known since they were toddlers picked it up, the pistol fired, discharging a .380 round that blew through his stomach, tearing into his intestines and nicking a vena cava vein, which carries blood to the heart.

The boy who’d brought the gun had found it at home, investigators say. His father, Michael Dugas, had given the weapon to his older son, who was 17. The teenager kept it in his room, loaded, unlocked and inside a bag that hung on the wall.

Soon after the shooting, Dugas was charged with two misdemeanors, eventually receiving six months in prison for his negligence.

Gage, meanwhile, endured four surgeries then had to learn to walk and eat again. Now 8, his 40-pound body hurts almost all the time, said his mother, Krista LeBleu.

The girl who accidentally shot him still struggles with guilt and post-traumatic stress. At a church camp last summer, a water-pistol fight broke out, and when she saw the plastic guns, the girl began to weep.

Gage has changed, too, his mother said. He had been so excited to flip the coin before a local football game a few months ago, but when the team rushed onto the field, someone fired a cannon. The boy’s knees buckled, and he collapsed to the grass, trembling as he curled into a ball. He still has nightmares, but he tells his parents they’re too scary to talk about. Gage is also more aggressive than before, sometimes erupting for no reason. Afterward, he can’t explain what happened.

“I don’t know why I’m so bad,” he says.

What remains for school shooting survivors? Grief, guilt and fear.

One day in 2008, Samantha Haviland sat on the floor of a school library’s back room, the lights off, the door locked. Crouched all around her were teenagers, pretending that someone with a gun was trying to murder them.

No one there knew that Haviland, then a counselor in her mid-20s, had been at Columbine nine years earlier. On that day, April 20, 1999, she had been in the cafeteria, selling chips and soda from a food cart to raise money for the golf team. Haviland, always an overachiever, had taken second place at a tournament the day before and felt so good about it that she’d worn a blue dress and high-heeled clogs to school. As hundreds of kids ate their lunches, she and three friends talked about prom, which they’d gone to the previous weekend.

Then two girls burst into the room. Someone had been shot, they screamed. Someone had a gun.

Haviland froze, but her friends grabbed her, and they fled into the back of an auditorium. Moments later, she heard four or five shots and an explosion. Everyone sprinted out as Haviland briefly paused to take off her shoes. Barefoot, she ran after them and into the hallway, and just as she reached one door, it closed in front of her. A teacher in another part of the building had pulled the fire alarm and, as she would later learn, it saved her life, because down that corridor, Harris and Klebold were slaughtering anyone they could find.

Afterward, as the shock and grief solidified her plan to become a counselor, Haviland didn’t get counseling herself. She didn’t deserve it, she thought, not when classmates had died or been maimed. Many others had suffered far more, Haviland decided. She would be okay.

But now there she was, a decade later, sitting in the darkness, practicing once again to escape what so many of her friends did not. Then she heard footsteps. Then, beneath the door, she saw the shadow of an administrator who was checking the locks. Then her chest began to throb, and her body began to quake and, suddenly, Haviland knew she wouldn’t be okay.

Researchers who study trauma still aren’t certain why people who experience it as children react in such different ways. For some, it doesn’t surface for years, making the effects harder to trace back to their origin. For others, the torment overwhelms them from the start and, in many cases, never lets go.

Karson Robinson was 6 when a teenager opened fire on the playground of his elementary school in Townville, S.C., on Sept. 28, 2016. Three days later, on his seventh birthday, he learned that his beloved friend, Jacob Hall, hadn’t survived the bullet that hit him. That’s when the guilt took hold. Karson had leaped a fence and run at the first sound of the gunfire.

Maybe, Karson thought, he could have saved Jacob, the smallest child in their class, if he hadn’t fled. At home, Karson began to explode in anger, breaking anything he could reach. Other times, he insisted that everyone hated him.

In October, before a doctor finally diagnosed the boy with PTSD, he had a party for his eighth birthday, and at the end, they released balloons into the sky for Jacob. Afterward, he walked off by himself. His mother followed, asking what was wrong.

“I should have waited for Jacob,” he told her.

Haviland thinks a lot about the thousands of children like Karson who, she contends, America has done so little to protect since Columbine. Many of Haviland’s former classmates have found success and happiness, but others have tried to ease their pain with drugs and alcohol. Some have considered killing themselves.

One high school friend sent Haviland a message online a few weeks ago, saying that, since the Las Vegas slaughter this past October, she’d been so stricken with anxiety she could barely leave her house.

A decade ago, after Haviland’s panic attack in the library, she finally got therapy and has come a long way since. She goes to movies and malls and political rallies. She has so often told her story--of hearing the shots, taking off her shoes, sprinting barefoot through the hallways--that telling it again doesn’t wreck her anymore.

She knows, though, that the trauma remains.

Three years ago, someone accidentally pressed a panic button in the school where she was working, signaling to police that a shooter was in the building. Haviland wasn’t there at the time, but she pulled up in her car just as the officers did. Then, in front of her, she saw students streaming outside, their hands in the air.

She began to sob.