#Lil's never gonna get a frosty

[the-lil-exorcist]

Time for a Re-ban

PARTIES:@the-lil-exorcist and @uncannysam TIME: Recent WHERE:  Wendy's SUMMARY:  Lil finally gets unbanned from Wendy's! Unfortunately for Lil and Sam, Steve never got rid of that poltergeist :/ WARNINGS: Unsanitary tw

Sam was craving a Frosty. Not vanilla or that new creamsicle thing that was out, but the OG…chocolate. And considering she hadn’t had dinner yet, she figured she would treat herself to some spicy nuggies and fries as well. But first, she had to lock up and take Scout upstairs. This, unfortunately, would not be a Scout thread, as dogs aren’t allowed in fast food establishments.

Once she had said goodbye to the best boy, Sam made her way back downstairs and out to her Bronco. Climbing in, she started up the truck and put on Simple Plan as she left the parking lot and headed towards Wendy’s, “Chocolate Frosty and chicken nuggies here I come!” She could already see it being the best part of her day.

Sam had lucked into a spot near the front door. Shutting off the engine, she climbed out and started making her way to the front door, but as she did, she could see some commotion just within the doorway, “I swear if someone ruins my chance at spicy nuggies, I’m gonna riot...” The comment was under her breath more or less, but after a rough day of one rude customer after another, she was being serious.

—

Lil was having a fantastic day. Her decade ban from Wendy’s was going to be done and she was grinning ear to ear at the idea that she could just walk in and get a frosty no problem. She even told Jonas excitedly, marking it down on a calendar that for the first time in her adult life she wasn’t banned from Wendy’s. 

It didn’t occur to her that the Wendy’s location that she had picked had been the one that the owner was still weary of her. “Steve - Steve I’m not banned anymore - You can’t just throw me out.” Lil said, trying to reason with the franchise owner. “Oh god I have the letter and everything.” 

The manager didn’t look amused and Lil was getting more and more angry. “Dude really? Look at the letter my ban is lifted. Just let me have the frosty.” Lil couldn’t hear the ghost sitting behind the counter laughing, knowing that Lil was about to get banned again as the lights flickered a little.

_

Squeezing her eyes together, as much as she didn’t want to end up in the middle of an argument, Sam reluctantly opened the door. If she wanted her nuggies meal and Frosty, she was gonna have to make it past this commotion. Just keep your head down. You can make it. Just a few hundred feet, and you’re in the clear.

Sam had her eyes on the prize. The counter where the cashier was looking on at the argument going on, in amusement, along with the rest of the kitchen staff. Apparently, Sam had chosen a slow time to come in. But that didn’t matter. She wanted her food dammit, and food is what she was going to get.

As took a deep breath and let out a heavy, low sigh, she cautiously moved forward keeping her head low. No sense in looking the beast right in the eye, when it would just draw attention to herself. No, the key was to be sly. As sly as…

_

Lil’s eyes went up to the flickering lights squinting at them and then back at Steve. “So you going to serve me?” His eyes flickered up as well and back at Lil staring at the letter in her hand she could see he was wavering. 

“Fine, Kid but if you do something weird again - I’m never letting you back in no matter what corporate says god it? ,” He said in a gruff voice signaling her to get closer so she could order. After all, she wasn’t seventeen anymore and even back then she had been a good kid - just messed up the frosty machine somehow.

For a moment Lil looked stunned that it had worked - something finally looking up as she heelied up to the front with a smile on her face. Something genuine and actually excited and not her normal half smile. For a moment she looked her age again, the dark circles disappearing. 

“Alright alright alright,” She said, her hand going to the counter as she started ordering the frosty. Once Lil turned slightly to see the woman behind her she continued, “Hey I’m having a great day - what do you want? Pass it on and everything.” 

The ghost whispered trying to get Lil’s attention, wanting the exorcist to notice him - and Lil heard nothing causing a little electric spark to go through the lights above. She wasn’t going to ignore him again. 

_

“Uh, yeah, sure, if you’re offering.” Sam had made it successfully, but had still been noticed. At least it hadn’t been in a ‘please help me convince this man to let me into the store’ kind of thing. That’s what had worried her, but instead of zigging, the situation zagged, and now, she was about to get dinner for free, “8 piece spicy nugget, medium fry, and large chocolate Frosty?” She hoped that wouldn’t be too much, and if it was, she was fine paying for her own food and would still find a way to pay it forward.

It wasn’t until she was standing at the counter, that she noticed the lights flickering above. And while it had caught her attention, she hadn’t thought anything about it. The building was old, right? Probably the first and only Wendy’s built in Wicked’s Rest.

Letting her eyes drift back down, Sam looked to Lil attempting to make small talk, “So great day for Wendy’s huh? You come here often?” Yes, she had heard the conversation, but her nerves had easily gotten the better of her, causing her to sound like an idiot, “Shit…sorry, I…yeah.” Sam looked down at the floor trying to stifle an unexpected laugh from her ignorance.

—

Lil nodded and added it to the order feeling delighted in herself that she was finally getting a win. She was pretty sure everyone needed a win lately as she paid for it. Leaning against the counter waiting for the frosty and the other’s food. 

At the question Lil chuckled, “No actually I’m not here often but hey! That can change now. See when I was a teen I got banned and bans only last for like ten years so I’m back now.” She said with a little grin. “Sorry - my name’s Lil - Lil Ballard and you caught me on a good day. Not everyday I can come in and get my own frosty. So are you new in town or have you been here awhile?”  

The ghost shook the frosty machine slightly wanting the exorcist's attention. It wasn’t fair that he was still here and that she hadn’t noticed him yet yelling out loud at the audacity. He wanted someone to talk to and this medium was going to recognize him or he would do something about it.

_

Sam raised her head and listened intently at the story of how the woman standing in front of her was banned. Even though she didn’t know her and hadn’t seen her around, Sam had felt bad for her. She couldn’t imagine living a decade without Frostys. That must have been so hard, “Whoa! An entire decade without the chocolatey goodness of a Frosty? I don’t know how you did it. And that’s not me being sarcastic, by the way. If I’m having a shit day, Frostys always seem to make it better. I’m glad you know this freedom again. And hey, thanks for dinner.” She smiled warmly. “Name’s Sam, Sam Walker. I moved here with my parents when I was about nine. What about you? I don’t think I’ve seen you around before.”

The shaking of the Frosty machine had caught Sam’s attention. Shifting her eyes from Lil, she couldn’t help but stare; her heart rate picking up slightly at the fear of this easily becoming a McDonald’s situation. “Speaking of, I really hope the machine isn’t about to die. I think we both came here with one thing on our mind, and I’m not ready to walk out of here empty handed.” She motioned towards the vibrating machine with her head.

—

“Oh my brother usually will come in and get me one, but it’s not the same you know?” Lil said knowing that Jonas never minded, but it didn’t feel the same. “They really do, don't they? They aren't too sweet and I really just like them a lot. - Oh really? Yeah I’m originally from here too, but I left for like ten years. Unrelated to the frosty thing to be clear.” Lil chuckled. “Nice to meet you Sam and no problem at all.” 

Lil’s eyes focused on the frosty machine a light frown on her face. “It better not - I would like to have a frosty.” Something felt off, a weird sort of feeling in the pit of Lil as she felt the room getting colder. She hadn’t noticed it before - too excited about the frosty - but she could feel it now as the machine rattled more in it’s place. 

“Oh not again,” Lil muttered under her breath as she leaned on the counter looking over to see a ghost grinning at her. “No - don’t you dare.- Not again you little brat.” Her hand going to her pocket to get salt to quickly dissipate the ghost for now she didn’t pay attention to how the machine sounded a weird keening noise as it started to vibrate at a higher frequency. 

___

“Yeah, I get that. And unless you’re waiting outside or in the car, it’s usually melted somewhat by the time it makes it back to you. Not to say that melted Frostys aren’t good as well, but you know…not the same.” Sam laughed. “That was nice of your brother. I’m sure he’ll be happy to know you can get your own Frostys now though.”

Sam had noticed the frown start to come over Lil’s face. If both girls had a feeling, this couldn’t be good right, “Did it just get colder in here?” She looked around as if to spot the culprit of the coldness, but saw nothing out of the ordinary.

Turning her attention back to Lil, Sam narrowed her eyes, “Lil…” Trying to understand what the woman was seeing, she looked towards the Frosty machine immediately noticing the noise. “Is everything okay…” It didn’t take long for the barely noticeable shake to turn into something more intricate and a little on the scary side. “I don’t think we should be this close…” And with that, Sam slowly started to back away, along with one of the employees who was just about to approach the machine.

—

“Exactly frosty’s are always good but having one in hand is just the best,” Lil said as the place got more and more hostile. 

She had been so sure she’d gotten the poltergeist last time. She could have sworn she did, but perhaps she hadn’t? Maybe it was a new ghost and this Wendy’s just hosted a lot of ghost vibes. Maybe spirits loved frosty’s just as much as the living did. 

In anycase, she could understand - but it didn’t change the fact she got a sinking feeling this was about to be her fault again. Lil’s hand reached for the salt, but before she could pour it out on the ghost, the machine started worryingly vibrating more and her eyes moved to it. Hearing Sam’s warning she moved backwards ducking at the counter just in time as the frosty machine exploded. 

Chocolate Frosty went everywhere as Lil tried to shield herself pulling the nearest cashier down with her so they didn’t get hit badly. 

Again. Lil had a frosty machine explode at her again. She really needed to teach Wendy’s to ghost proof their places as she said “Sam - you okay? Is everyone okay?” She asked as she felt the ghost’s presence behind her. 

Lil couldn’t hear it but she could feel him snickering. “Oh Pal I’m going to ruin your afterlife -”

_

It was as if everything was happening in slow motion. The machine became increasingly worse as the lights flickered again above where they were standing. How this was possible, Sam wasn’t sure? Mechanical error? Faulty wiring? Creature that went bump in the night? She couldn’t put that past her with all she had come to see within the last few months, and here she was again. Finding herself caught up in a freakish situation with nowhere to go, but down.

Ducking as the loudness in the restaurant increased, she finally pulled her head down with her hands out of safety as she heard the machine combust, sending a massive amount of creamy cold chocolate and creamsicle all over the front of the restaurant and its current occupants. It was cold when it splashed down on her and gave her a chill to match that of the cold air circulating within the restaurant.

When all was said and done, Sam slowly raised up to see if Lil and the workers were okay, including a very angry manager who came storming up from the back. Expected, but not what caught Sam’s attention. Instead, it was Lil who had said something about the afterlife, “I’m fine, but…what do you mean afterlife, Lil?” She moved in closer, with the sense that this was probably a conversation that didn’t need to be heard by all the Wendy’s employees who were flocking up front to see what had happened.

—-

Lil should have just pretended she didn’t know what happened. Last time Steve had gotten mad because she had ranted about ghosts and how a poltergeist had caused the frosty machine to explode- but even now she couldn’t keep her mouth shut.

“It’s a ghost. There’s a poltergeist here - I know you probably can’t see it but that’s what’s happening. I’m about to get banned again so uh - probably don’t follow me. I’m sorry you aren’t getting a frosty today.” 

Without any more thoroughfare Lil jumped the counter sliding through the chocolate frozen treat that she was hoping to you know - have again. 

“Ghost. It’s a god damn ghost in the machine - Steve I was right, ” She huffed angry as she went to pour salt around the machine realizing that the ghost had jumped into the object. “Oh no you stay back for a moment - don't you dare try to kick me out yet. This is god damn personal.” Gritting her teeth she put her hand into the machine hitting the machine inside. “Come out you son of a bitch.” 

Lil realized that Sam wouldn’t understand what she was doing, that she probably looked crazy but the ghost did appear over the machine smirking at her as she glared up. She would have looked intimidating if she wasn’t covered in chocolate. “It’s the same god damn ghost - Steve I swear to god.” 

_

Sam paused, and in a quick jolt at the word ghost, her mind spiraled. The eclipse. Zach. Zach was a ghost that was really there. It wasn’t a dream or just in her head. That day had really and truly existed, and it was just something to add to an already confusing town that Sam was slowly adjusting to more and more each day, “A…ghost? Is there anything I can…”

Before she could finish that thought, she watched as Lil jumped over the counter. There was clearly a goal in mind, and she could tell the woman was pissed. With each passing word, she realized that this was the thing that had gotten Lil banned a decade ago, and Sam definitely didn’t want to be a part of that. She needed her Frostys, even if she was currently covered from head-to-toe in one.

Just as cautiously as she had come in, Sam had started to slowly back out. At least one of them had to be able to still get sugary, chocolaty treats for them both, right? And besides, this crap was cold and was starting to congeal to her hair, skin, and clothes, and it wasn’t very enjoyable either. “Uh, I’m just gonna…” Without much of a word, Sam skedaddled out the door, not wanting the wrath of Steve or the ghost to come down on her. She had enough stuff to process and figure out, like how she was going to drive home without messing up the seats of her Bronco. But she would find Lil again, because she absolutely wanted to know how this story ended.

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Reindeer

Summary: It's Christmas Eve, and you and Javi spent the night preparing for your girls to have the most magical Christmas morning

Word Count: 5.2K

Paring: Dad!Javi x Wife!Reader (No use of y/n, reader's nickname is Osita)

Warnings: SMUT (18+) unprotected p in v sex, oral (f recieving), creampie, praise kink, talk about not using birth control, kind of getting caught (??? Thank Santa's Reindeer I guess), terrible Christmas puns, sweet, sickening Christmas fluff, Javi spoiling the crap out of his little girls because he loves them more than life, idk you guys, this story is just a warm lil Christmas hug 😭

A/N: IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!! Christmas is my favorite holiday, and I have been so excited to write about our adorable lil Peña family and their holiday endeavors 🥹 These two would do anything to give their girls the most magical Christmases ever and my heart is exploding into a million pieces 😭💕🎄

Series Masterlist Never Too Late Masterlist

“Mommy, is Santa coming now?” 

“No, baby. Not until tomorrow.” 

“...Is tomorrow now?” Your 4 year old Harper questioned, plopping herself down on the couch next to Javi, snuggling herself in between her dad and older sisters as you tucked the girls in with a big, fluffy blanket before finding your spot next to your husband. 

“No Harper, Santa comes at night. When we go to bed. Remember?” Elliot sassed, letting out a huff of frustration at how many times her younger sister had asked about the long awaited arrival of Christmas morning. 

“Elliot! If you’re not nice to Harper, Santa may not come!” Your oldest Lucy gasped, trying to police her younger sisters’ behavior within an inch of her life to ensure that she would wake up with presents under the tree tomorrow. 

Elliot’s face went white in fear, immediately reaching over to her younger sister and pulling her in for a long hug. “Sorry, Harper. Santa will be here tomorrow morning… I hope.” 

“I don’t think you girls need to worry, I’m sure Santa knows you’ve been pretty darn good all year long.” Javi grinned, leaning over on the couch to wrap the girls up in his broad grasp, making them giggle and squeal as he tickled and peppered them with playful kisses. “Okay, Pollitas (little chickens) what do you say you guys start the movie and Mommy and I go make hot chocolate?” Reaching over to give your thigh a little squeeze, Javi shot you a little wink, tilting over to press a soft kiss into your hair. 

“Yay! Hot Chocolate!” The girls screeched in unison, waving their little arms in the air in excitement as they snuggled closer together on the couch. “Thank you!” 

“De Nada (you’re welcome).” Javi beamed, letting out a little grunt as he pressed his hands into his knees, rising up off the couch, giving each of the girls one more kiss before making his way to the kitchen. 

“Alright cuties, which movie, Rudolph or Frosty?” You smiled, making your way over to the TV to hold up their VHS options. 

���Rudolph! Rudolph!” The three chanted, wiggling in excitement in their spots as you pressed the tape into the VCR and hit play on the remote, following Javi’s suit as you gave each of your daughters a quick kiss before making your way into the kitchen where you found Javi with a handful of Christmas mugs and an extra large can of whipped cream. 

“Javi…” You sighed, letting out a little laugh as he set down the five mugs on the counter followed by the whipped cream, “I think we probably should go easy on the whipped cream tonight, you already know how hard it is to get them to bed on Christmas Eve, and a sugar high isn’t gonna help.” 

“What makes you think I’d give ‘em too much whipped cream?” He smirked, shrugging his shoulders at you as he pulled the box of hot chocolate out of the cabinet, setting it next to everything else before snaking his hand around your waist, pulling you in closer to peck a quick kiss on your lips, staring down at you with his sweet brown eyes. 

“Because,” You huffed playfully, pressing up on your tiptoes to give him another peck back between your words, “you spoil these girls rotten. They’ve got you wrapped around their fingers, Jav, each and every one of them.” 

“Can you blame me?” He beamed, gesturing towards your daughters all snuggled together, giggling and singing along to the movie. The two of you couldn’t help but admire your beautiful girls, letting out a content sigh as you rested your head on his shoulder, taking a moment to soak in how truly lucky you were- because truth be told, you couldn’t blame Javi one bit. 

“No, I can’t. God, they are cute, aren’t they?” 

“Cute just like their Momma.” Javi grinned, sneaking his hand just a little further down your waist to grab a handful of your ass, making you let out a little squeal before giving him a playful smack in the chest. 

“You’re lucky you’re cute.” You smirked, making your way over to the fridge to grab your milk, completing your hot chocolate ensemble. “I honestly should be having coffee right now considering how late we’re gonna be up, setting up presents and putting things together.”

“C’mon, we’re pros at this by now.” Javi teased, now getting to work on warming up the hot chocolate ingredients. 

“Oh yeah? Tell that to Santa who insisted on getting the girls a brand new hockey net that still needs to be assembled, even after all of their gifts had already been bought.” You sighed, rolling your eyes at Javi as you began pouring the hot chocolate into the girls mugs, sprinkling mini marshmallows on the tops of their cups. 

“They’ve been extra good…” Javi pouted, shooting you a guilty look as you handed him over mugs to be topped off with whipped cream. 

“Well, I sure hope Santa didn’t lose the instructions to put it together because Mrs. Claus will not be assembling the net at 2 am.” 

“Don’t worry, we’ll be done before then. Gotta make sure Santa has plenty of time to give you his North Pole before Christmas morning.” Javi chuckled, biting down on his lip to contain his laughter as you gave him another nudge, snickering along with him. 

“You are such a dork.” 

“What? You’ve been a good girl this year too, you don’t want Santa to stuff your chimney?”

That one made you almost drop the two mugs you had in your hands, letting out an audible snort as you set them down on the counter, burying your face in your hands to try and hold in your laughter. 

“You are fucking ridiculous, you know that? Finish up these hot chocolates, you dummy, your daughters are waiting for you.” You smirked, picking back up your mugs as you began to make your way out of the kitchen. 

“Like you’re waiting for my balls of holly later?” Javi quietly called out behind you, making you whip your head around to give him the biggest stank face you could muster, unimpressed. “What? That’s a good one.” Javi insisted, still laughing at his own joke. 

“Ridiculous, I swear.” 

It wasn’t long after your hot chocolates were finished that the girls had passed out on the couch, cuddled in a pile between you and Javi and buried under the blanket that had been spread across the 5 of you. You probably should have woken the girls up to get them off to bed, but you and Javi couldn’t help but relish in the moment of your family snuggled together in the soft glow of your Christmas tree lights, your hearts feeling fuller than any present under your tree could make you.

After the two of you finally agreed you had soaked in enough snuggles, you gently woke up Lucy as Javi slung Elliot and Harper over his shoulders to carry them off to bed, unable to stop yourself from admiring how broad he looked with your two girls and their matching pajamas and sleepy hair hoisted on either side of him. 

You helped Lucy and Elliot get settled into their rooms, promising to make your way back to say goodnight after tucking in Harper, still sound asleep in Javi’s arms as he laid her down into bed, gently tucking her into her covers, brushing her tangled curls away from her face and pressing a soft kiss onto her forehead. Elliot was next, now half awake after being dropped off in her room, stumbling her way into her own bed, grumbling a half awake “Goodnight Mommy and Daddy” as she snuck into her sheets, nestled between the mountain of stuffed animals piled between her mattress and bedroom wall. You and Javi couldn’t help but chuckle at how quickly your little rock was back to being sound asleep as soon as she hit the bed, already inheriting her dad’s obnoxiously loud snoring at the ripe age of 6. Lucy was the last stop on your bedtime train, seeing as she was the most awake and coherent as she had at least been able to walk herself to bed after you and Javi had woken her up. 

By the time you and Javi had gotten to her room, she had already settled into bed, pulling her comforter up to her face as she snuggled up with her worn and well loved stuffed penguin, her little face lighting up as the two of you made your way though the door.  

“Hi cutie pie.” You cooed, sitting on the edge of her bed, gently stroking her hair as Javi settled down onto the mattress next to you. “You ready for Christmas tomorrow?” 

Lucy nodded, a slight look of concern now spreading across her face as her big brown eyes stared back up at you. “Mom… Santa’s gonna come tonight, right? He won’t be mad at Elliot or Harper because sometimes they aren’t always good… Well okay, I guess I’m not always good either, but-” 

“Amoricta (Little love),” Javi cooed, reaching over to reassuringly rub her back, cutting her off mid sentence, “You and your sisters are the best daughters that we could ask for. I know for a fact that Santa knows that. And I also know that he knows what a good older sister you are to Elliot and Harper. Don’t worry, Monita (Little Monkey), I’m sure Santa will come.” 

“Okay Dad. Te amo (I love you). I love you too, Mommy.” Lucy grinned, snuggling deeper into her sheets with a content sigh, slowly beginning to close her eyes and drift off to sleep. 

“We love you too, Lucy.” 

“Te amamos mucho, linda (we love you so much, cutie).” 

As you and Javi each gave Lucy one last kiss goodnight, pressing gentle kisses in her messy hair, you gently closed the door behind you, the soft click of the last bedroom door knob signaling your success at getting the girls to bed before the real work of Christmas Eve began. You turned around, holding out your hand to give Javi a quiet high-five to celebrate the easiness of your bedtime routine before snaking your hands around Javi’s waist, caging your chest with his as you looked up at him. 

“I think that was the quickest we’ve ever gotten them to bed on Christmas Eve.” 

“I don’t even think the whipped cream even had anything to do with it.” Javi teased, shaking you playful in his grasp. 

“Pendejo (Jerk). C’mon, let’s go get these cuties some presents, Santa.” 

After your 8th Christmas with kids, you and Javi had gotten present set up and placement down to a science. After several trips up and down the stairs to the basement, all of the gifts for the girls had been set under the tree as Javi got to work on setting up his inevitable last minute gift that seemed to make its way out of Santa’s Workshop every year, even when all of your agreed upon gifts had already been purchased. 

Javi sat cross legged on the floor, directions and hockey net parts spread out in front of him as he grumbled to himself trying to connect two of the pieces together, letting out a frustrated sigh while you set out the plate of cookies the girls had decorated for Santa, laughing at your husband’s current fight with his late gift. 

“How’s it goin’, Jav? Need me to call in the elves to ask for help?” You snickered, plopping yourself down next to him, grabbing a few pieces to help with assembling. 

“Shut up. I think I’m almost done, I just have to put the net part on. Is everything else set up?” 

“Mmmmhmmm. Including the reindeer carrots that are your turn to eat this year.” 

“Fuck me…” Javi sighed, shooting you a menacing look, “Do I have to? You know I-” 

“Oh believe me, I know how much you hate the carrots.” You giggled, mischievously raising an eyebrow at him, handing over a few of the pieces you had put together to connect to the existing frame of the hockey net. “I did it the past 2 years in a row. You are such a baby, you know that? Your turn for carrots this year, Peña. I made sure they were the biggest ones I could find. You know how hungry those reindeer are.” 

Before Javi could respond, he was grabbing you around your side, tickling your stomach as payback as you laughed and squirmed in his grasp, flailing your arms as the two of you rolled over on the ground. Javi pulled you to lay on top of his chest as he rested his back against the floor, wrapping his arms around the small of your back, peppering kisses along your jaw and neck. You tried your best to keep your squeals semi-silent to prevent waking up the girls as his mustache brushed against your skin, the smile spread across his lips pressing over your body. 

“Don’t think- don’t think your adorable antics are getting you out of carrot duty.” You snickered, cupping your hands around his cheeks, pausing his assault of kisses as his sweet brown eyes stared up at you. 

“Me? Trying to get out of eating those terrible ass vegetables? Never. What would make you think that, Hermosa?” Javi smirked, his voice oozing with sarcasm as he shook his head at you, caging you tighter against his chest as his hands slid down the small of your back, now grabbing handfuls of your ass, making you let out a little squeal. 

“Javi! You are so bad!” You playfully scolded, trying to pry off the tight grip his palms had on your backside to free yourself. “Presents and carrots first, you know the rules.” Smirking down at him, Javi let out a reluctant sigh, finally releasing you as he sat back up, picking up one of the remaining pieces of the hockey net left to assemble, shaking his head in a sarcastic disappointment at his failed attempt to at least prolong the inevitable. 

“You don’t wanna let Santa stuff your stocking early this year, huh?” Javi teased, giving you a little shrug as he chuckled to himself at the terrible Christmas puns he had in stock tonight. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, Javi…” You sighed, burying your hand in your face in embarrassment at your husband’s terrible joke, giving him a little shove as you stood up, making your way back to the kitchen to set up the rest of the cookies and carrots before the two of you headed off to bed. “You keep making those terrible puns and I’m gonna make you wrap your present before you give it to me.” You joked, eying the half hard bulge still in Javi’s sweatpants and gesturing your head towards your bedroom where your unopened box of condoms sat untouched in Javi’s nightstand- You had never started taking your birth control again after having Harper, and while you and Javi had agreed that 3 girls was the perfect number of kids, you also hadn’t necessarily been proactively preventing yourself from having a 4th. Javi had bought the box in an effort of good faith a few months ago, but hadn’t seen an ounce of action, despite all of the action that had happened without them. 

“Fine, fine, I’ll be good, don’t put me on the naughty list yet. Like you’d want my present wrapped anyways…” Javi smirked, snapping together two of the last pieces of the hockey net before pressing his hands to his knees, letting out a grunt as he stood, and pushing the net by the rest of the already arranged presents. 

“I swear, I’m sending you back to the North Pole.” 

With your living room perfectly arranged for Christmas Morning, you and Javi made your way back to your bedroom, stopping to do a quick peek in on each of the girls as you traveled down the hallway. All 3 lay sound asleep in their beds, quietly snoring away, you and Javi making your way to your bedroom with a quiet high five for Christmas Eve accomplishments- presents assembled, girls asleep, the palpable excitement of the holiday hanging in the air. 

“Bets on what time they’re up tomorrow?” You laughed, looking over at Javi, standing in the doorway brushing his teeth as you stripped out of your clothes and into your pajamas. Javi let out a playful huff before stepping back into the bathroom to spit out the rest of his toothpaste, setting his toothbrush next to yours before taking off his shirt and sweatpants and tossing them into the hamper with your freshly shed clothes. 

“If it’s anything past 5:30, I’ll be happy.” He chuckled, climbing into bed with you, sneaking his way under the covers and wrapping his arms around your waist, making you giggle as he tugged you closer, pressing ticklish kisses over your neck and face as you playfully swatted at him. “If my girls are happy, I’m happy.” 

“I’m sure the girls will be more than happy. Considering how much their Daddy spoils them rotten.” You teased, reaching up to cup Javi’s face, your thumb gently stroking the scratchy stubble of his cheek. 

“What? Santa only comes once a year, right? I’d give ‘em everything if I could. They deserve it. Just like their Momma deserves everything too.” Javi gently rasped against the skin of your neck, softly sucking at your pulse point, forcing a breathy moan to escape from your mouth. “God I still don’t know what I ever did to deserve you, Hermosa. If you’re the only present for the rest of my life, I’ll die a fucking happy man.” 

Letting his hands snake down your sides, Javi’s fingertips toyed with the hem of your shirt and pajama bottoms, his fingers sliding towards your heat as your lips met his with a gentle and tender passion. You ran your fingers through the dark curls of his hair as he flipped you onto your back, now pressing languid kisses down your stomach as he carefully tugged your pajama bottoms off your hips, tossing them to the floor. Letting your knees fall open, Javi’s soft kisses met the inside of your thighs, a smile spreading across his lips as you revealed the slick that had been pooling between your legs. 

“And this…” Javi smirked, letting his kisses feather closer and closer to your core, leaving your hips to instinctively start to buck towards his face as you waited for his tongue to relieve the dull ache of your already throbbing clit, “This is the best fucking present I could ever ask for.” 

Before you could even roll your eyes at Javi’s cheesy remark, a long, broad swipe of his tongue traveled through your folds, the sensation already enough to have you trying your best to stifle your moans to keep from waking the girls just down the hall from you. Javi took his time, letting his tongue work around your clit in a mix of flat, even strokes and circling swirls, his arm draped across your hips to hold you in place while his other free hand reached up to grab yours, your fingers intertwining, palms pressed together. 

You bit down on your lip as his nose bumped against your throbbing bundle of nerves, letting his tongue plunge in and out of your cunt, the familiar tingle at the base of your spine beginning to build as your bottom half squirmed against the sheets, Javi’s firm grasp keeping you in place. 

Javi had spent years memorizing every tick and twitch that made you writhe under his touch, learning each moan and movement that brought you closer to your end- so it should have been no surprise to you that Javi could sense you were close, yet the sudden switch of his mouth latching around your clit, sweetly sucking at your sensitive bundle of nerves, had the coil in your belly on the verge of snapping. 

“Javi… Oh, fuck- baby, I’m close, don’t stop, please don’t stop, oh my god.” You whimpered, trying your best to keep your voice hushed, but despite how hard you tried, you could help but let a muffled moan escape from your lips as you squeezed down even harder on Javi’s hand to try and keep from being any louder than you already were. It wasn’t long before you felt your legs begin to tremble, and heat bloom in your core, your orgasm ripping through your body, leaving you panting and breathless as Javi pulled back from between your legs, a boyish grin spread across his shiny face, now covered in your arousal. 

You could feel your chest rising and falling, your breathing heavy and labored as Javi crawled his way back up the bed, reaching down to help tug his boxers off his legs, revealing his cock, already painfully hard and dripping with precum as you thumbed at his tip, slowly wrapping your fingers around his length, stroking him as a low groan rumbled in his chest. 

As he slotted himself between your legs, you guided his tip towards your entrance, collecting the slick dripping through your folds before caging his chest against yours, pressing into you inch by inch, the sweet stretch of his fullness making you whimper as he bottomed out against your cervix. His lips met yours, his mouth catching your whines as he began to slowly thrust in and out of you, like he was savoring every moment buried deep in the warmth and wetness inside you. 

“Shhhhh, gotta be quiet for me baby.” He rasped against your skin, nipping at your ear, almost as if he was trying to remind himself as much as he was reminding you, a deep grunt rustling in the back of his throat. You nodded, your eyes meeting the brown pools of his, filled with an equal mix of love and longing as a tender smile lined his lips, whispering a soft “I love you” to one another before your lips were slotted together once again, your tongues swiping in the parted spaces between your mouths, your kisses slow and solicitous as you became more and more tangled in your sheets. 

Each thrust of Javi’s hips felt deeper and fuller than the last, the lewd noises of your wetness and muted moans coating the walls of your bedroom only intensified as Javi wrapped his broad hands around the backs of your thighs, pressing your legs to your chest, and making you clench tighter around the sweet sting of his stretch. 

“Fuck, you’re so fucking perfect, Hermosa. My beautiful fucking wife.” Javi mewled through gritted teeth, snaking his hand between your bodies to rub your clit, still swollen and puffy from your first orgasm. You let out a sharp gasp, so sensitive and worked up, already feeling yourself climbing towards your own high once again as the pads of his fingers circled your mound, and dick punched against your g-spot. 

You could feel your cunt beginning to clench tighter around his cock, fighting with everything in you to keep from screaming out his name, fisting at your bedsheets and clamping your eyes shut, trying to hold out for any ounce of composure you had left. “Fuck, Javi, fuck- I feel like I’m gonna cum again, fuck- oh fuck.” You whined, eyes still closed, head tilted back against the pillow. 

Suddenly, you felt Javi’s free hand slide under jaw, wrapping his fingers around your cheeks, gently forcing your head back down, making you open your eyes to see the wrecked look also beginning to spread its way across his face. “It’s okay, sweet girl. Just need to see that pretty face for me when you cum. Let go baby, I’ve got you.” 

With only a few more thrusts and circles of your clit, you could feel the tingle at the base of your spine beginning to spread through every inch of your body, pleasure rushing through your veins as your orgasm crashed over you. Javi’s hand covered your mouth in just enough time to mute the ragged moans escaping your lips, the feeling of you clamping down around his cock as you came almost enough to take him out right along with you, fighting with everything in him to let you finish riding out your own high before he followed suit. 

“Fuck, fuck- I’m not gonna last much longer, Osita. Oh shit- Fuck, where do you want me, baby?” Javi grunted, his thrusts becoming sloppier and faster with each snap of his hips, the hand covering your mouth now gripping the meat of your thighs, fingertips digging into your skin. 

“Inside, please, fuck- I’m not ovulating, please, I need to feel you in me.” You whimpered, your brain barely functioning as you tried to form a coherent sentence, still reeling from your orgasm. 

That was all Javi needed to send him over the edge, barely making it halfway through his last thrust before spilling deep inside you, his cock throbbing as warm spend covered your walls, milking himself of every last drop before letting his body slump into yours, your chests rising and falling in sync. 

You both lay there for a moment, breathless and blissed out as you tried to compose yourselves, Javi letting out a soft hiss as he pulled out, resting his head against your chest as you ran your fingers through the damp curls of his hair, a satisfied smirk spreading across your face as you quietly giggled to yourself. 

“What’s so funny?” Javi asked, perking his head up to look at you, his brow scrunched in confusion. 

“Your sleigh feelin’ a little lighter? Because I think I did a pretty good job of helping Santa to empty his sack.” You couldn’t help but snort as Javi let out the most exasperated sigh before joining in your laughter, burying his face in his hand before looking back up at you. 

“And I'm the ridiculous one....” 

“MOMMY, DADDY! WAKE UP, WAKE UP, IT’S CHRISTMAS!” 

If your daughters' high pitched shrieks and squeals weren’t enough to have you wide awake at the ripe hours of 5:46 A.M., their tiny bodies flopping onto the bed, squishing you and Javi under your covers most definitely was. 

“Mhmmmmm, Merry Christmas, cuties.” You yawned, stretching your arms over your head, trying to wake yourself up quick enough to keep up with your girls’ boundless energy, giving Javi a stark nudge with your elbow to help wake him up from his log-like slumber. “Jav, wake up, baby.” 

“Daddy! It’s Christmas, you gotta wake up!” Elliot insisted, now jumping on top of her dad, making him let out a loud grunt as her body landed on top of his. 

“Yup, yup, I’m up, I’m up.” Javi grumbled, rubbing his hand over his face, trying to wake himself up enough to face the wrath of his energetic daughters. “Merry Christmas, Pollitas.” He smiled, reaching out grab the girls and pull them on top of his chest, making all of them giggle and squeal in delight as the 5 of you snuggled together in your bed. 

“Can we see if Santa came? Please, please, pleaseeeeee?” Lucy begged, her sisters nodding in agreement, bouncing up and down on the bed with excitement as you and Javi inched yourself more and more awake. 

“Yup, let’s g-”

“LET’S GO!” The girls screeched, already scampering off the bed and out the door as you and Javi pushed yourselves up off the mattress, groggily following behind your daughters with heavy footsteps trying to wake yourselves up from your lack of sleep the night before. 

“Do you think Santa brought us coffee?” Javi mumbled, running his hand through his curls, ruffling the ends of his hair as you curled tighter against the oversized sweatshirt draped over your body, letting out a little half yawn, half laugh. 

As the 5 of you finally made it down the stairs, you could hear the girls squealing and pattering around the kitchen, gleefully pointing to the table, where a now practically cleared plate for Santa and his Reindeer sat. “Mommy, look! Santa ate all the cookies!” Harper giggled, grabbing you and Javi by the hand and dragging you across the room to see the lack of sugary treats that had been left behind. 

“And the reindeer too! I told you they love the carrots! They must have been really excited because last night, in the middle of the night, I could have sworn I heard the reindeer making happy noises for their treats too! Mom and Dad, I think they must have landed on the roof by your room, because that’s where I heard the noises coming from!” Lucy informed her sisters, leaving you and Javi’s faces both ghost white at the realization you two were 100% the reindeer that your daughter had heard last night. 

“Oh wow, Lucy, that’s uh- Yeah, they really must love those carrots.” Javi barely choked out, the both of you grimacing at each other in horror, guilty looks plastered across your faces. 

“Let’s go see what’s under the tree!” Elliot squealed, dashing towards the living room, completely oblivious to her dad’s comment, too focused on the gifts sitting under the tree for her and her sisters to care about any reindeer her sister may or may not have heard. Once again, your trio was off, sprinting to the living room, leaving you and Javi practically speechless as you wearily trailed behind them. 

“I’ve always worried about them catching us, but never once did I think about the fact they’d mistake us for reindeer.” You quietly snickered, giving Javi a playful nudge, trying to laugh to keep from dying of embarrassment. “Santa’s definitely putting us on the naughty list next year.” 

“Mommy! Daddy! Come here! Look what Santa brought us!” 

“He got us a new hockey net!” 

“Oh my god this is the best Christmas ever!” 

“I think Santa will understand.” Javi smiled, pressing a soft kiss into your forehead, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you closer to his chest as you watched your girls scamper in joy around your living room, the soft glow of your Christmas tree lighting up their beaming smiles as they began the hunt for their presents. Because the truth was, in that moment, nothing else in the world mattered. Not reindeer noises, lack of sleep, or late nights setting up last minute presents- The only thing that mattered in that moment was the pure love and happiness radiating from every inch of your living room. At the end of the day, you couldn't care how many presents sat under your tree because the best gift you could ever ask for stood right beside you and in front of you, and that was enough to make you feel like the luckiest person on earth. You weren’t sure you’d ever understand what you had done to deserve the world’s most perfect present- Your beautiful family and the life you had built together with them. 

“I love you so much, Javi. Merry Christmas.” 

“I love you more, Osita. Merry Christmas, mi amor.” 

Taglist

@cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @messinadress @milly-louise @jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @nastiasnow @vee-bees-blog @hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse

[relax-and-read-on]

More primarch bio baby headcanon, because yall seem to love them

This time only the traitor primarch, bcs I want to go deeper in the HC. Cor the sake of "how do they get babies", I will go and say that Big E wanted them to have heir for some reasons, and in his usual fashion, just sprang random tube babies on them.

Konrad: He was already unhappy to be a father to a bunch of semi-responsable adult. He's gonna FREAK OUT at having at baby. He's really bad at it, but at least he has the common sense to admit it and ask for help. The problem is that he's suronded but other psycho weirdo. The child is actually quite happy, as they get away with everything and happen to be super spoiled. Every night lord adore them and are just so! Excited!! To teach the kid how to stab people!!! Surprisingly a social kid, and that's mostly Sevatar influence, as he half raised them. It make for a lot of hilarious situation, and their dad is really confuse by it. The only creature in existence that will hapily sit on Konrad knee. Doesn't understand the concept of fear. Or of social nicety. Or of gender. Probably nibble on cut fingers for his afternoon snack. Somehow, manage to be one of the cutest primarch baby. Very chubby too, because Konrad grew up in food insecurity, and it trigger deep fear in him. Grew up to be an absolute lil monster, who fit in perfectly with his family. They are just a bit sad that they can't seem to befriend other kids their age, or the various cousins they have.

Mortarion: he love his kid so much. The kind of tender quiet love where he keep a stack of letter for his kid to read when they are older. He never use a baby voice with them, and never really shy away from the harsh reality of life. Love working with his child in the same room, and offer them just. So many books. An incredibly bright and clever kid, who probably prefer spending time with adult than other kids. Still, Mortarion really worry that he can never offer them what they deserve, and that his legions is just... Not the best environment for a child. Very, very gradually, he get them away, spend more time at the golden palace or with other legions. It break his heart in a millions pieces, but he fully think that they would be better away from him. Said kid does grew up in a wonderful person, and does come around from time to time to hang out with their distant but loving father.

Magnus: God that one is complicated. See, Magnus is a good guy. A great guy even! And he does care a lot for his sons! But they are adults. They are smart, logical being. A child, a baby, is not logical at all. It's not that Magnus dislike them at all, he just is.... Disinterested in them. He can't really have deep conversations or anything with a baby, and he's always so busy. Probably figure very quickly how to cradle and rock them psychically, wich he find smart because hey, now he has his hands free and can fo other things!! The problem is that him and the child develop no attachment to each others, and it only get worst as the time goes on. Of course he love the child, it's a biological impulse, but he also over analyse his own feeling and doesn't have to instinctive impulse and feeling that he should get. Meanwhile, the child grow more and more contrarian toward Magnus, making the gap in understanding between them only grow. By the time they hit teenage years, they are downright frosty with one another, and Magnus is lowkey at a lost how he got there. Especially since his kid is "finally" starting to be interesting and have good convo, and he's actually paying attention to them now. This is the last straw, and said child just. Demand emancipation and move out.

Lorgar: He didn't sleep the first night he got his baby. He sat in silence, holding them in his room, as they slept in his arm. And in that moment, he realised that he would never, ever raise his hand on them. That he would rather die before doing that. It was an earth shattering revelation, and he probably cried a bit, realising that he has a LOT of issues, and that he was going to have a lot of problem going forward. He himself feel trapped in his own environment he made, with Erebus and Kor Phaeron who just keep advising him on how to handle his child. He ignore them at the best he can, but he also has extreme anxiety on leaving the kid alone with anyone. If they have to be babysat, he will go out of his way to let his own brothers care for his child and not his legions. He love his sons, but he know they would also obey Erebus and his horrible father. In spite of that, he raise his kid in his religion, and make sure that no one can reproach anything to them. As they turn teenager and start to questions and rebel a lot more, he has to get in rather ugly argument and fight with everyone around him to protect his child. Eventually the kid just... Want to go away and renonce their faith, and sure, it made Lorgar hearth brake, but at the same time, his child was free. Probably sent them to Roboute or Corvus, to their great confusion. They don't talk for a few years, because religious trauma take time to process, but they do come back to talk to their loving dad, when they eventually realised the amount of sacrifice Lorgar has done for them.

Perturabo: All his life, he wanted to be the first choice, the number one, to be loved unconditionally. The first time he held his kid, realised that this lil innocent human loved him without question, he decided that his entire life was dedicated to them now. He would burn down the universe before letting harm happen to his baby. Never, ever loose his tamper with them, and has a very hard time not just.... Holding them everywhere. Co sleeping is very much happening. He actually become a better person for his child, a lot more social and a bit more mellow on his legion. The kind of dad who show you his entire photo album of his kid after talking to you for 5 minute. They stay very close and in general he's in the running for dad of the year. Get every drawing they ever produce framed and put on display. Organise the best birthday party. That kid is so happy, has such a brilliant and wonderful life, you know they become friend with a lot of the other, fast. Perturabo actually tell them, once they are older, that they are the best thing to have ever happened in his life. Full stop. They became a better person, and raised a wonderful kid. Yall know big E is patting himself in the back for that one.

Angron: This is just cruel. Giving a child to Angron, while he has the nail, is straight up torture. He love kids, alright? Adore them. He would have had many if he could. But he know he's not a competant father right now, and he's so scared of accidentally hurting them, or that one of his sons will. As a result, the child is raised collectively, as much by space marines than the human crew. Very young, they understood that their dad had problem in his brain, and that it's not that he doesn't love them, he's just sick. They never miss on love tho, as there is always someone to play with and care for them. Very early on, they develop an interest in medicine and helping others, and the day when a 10 years old say to Angron that they want to become a doctor so they they can heal their father and legion's brothers? Angron cry ok. He adore that pure little soul, and cannot beleive that he was blessed with such a sweet child. Very touch receptive, they were raised in a legions where most have occasional fits where talking is near impossible, and as such, hugging and physical touch became very common. They also figured are the one to figure out that sign language is not affected by the nails!!

Horus: The funny dad. You know, like those classic silly sitcom dad, who don't always understand what is going on with their kid but gosh do they love them. Shower them in praise, and probably push them into all sort of activities and hobby. He's raising them with Sanguinius' one, making them a lil family of 4. Horus consider both child like his owns, and both kids see them as parents, and consider each other twins. The child specifically from Horus does start having issues as a teen, mostly of the rebelious, "i don't want to be like my dad" kind. Nothing super major, but they have a tendancy to sneak out and go have fun with like, the human crew. Horus want to be more mad, but he does recognise himself a lot in that child, and he has another kid to also care for. They reaaally love having 1 on 1 bounding activity tho, like sparing or piloting small spaceship. Probably the most alike of all parent/kid duo. There is a lot to be said, but it mostly relate to their twin sibling and the family unit as a whole with Sanguinius. That said, Horus child is VERY clingy of his "twin", and when they were young, refused to be separated from them.

Alpharius/Omegon: I love those two. I love their legion. It CANNOT be a good environment to raise a child, I'm sorry. You can't just Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss your kid into joining the super spys, this is not how this work. The amount of tantrum that kid would throw early one, from growing up in an unstable environment... Yeah no. They feel no emotional connection to the child, at all. Not only that, but you know they have a tendancy to put work before family, and again, that put the kid in a bad place. They are barely a pre-teen when they have one final meltdown, screaming that they hate them, and wants nothing to do with the family and the legions. And the twins... Sadly, they never really wanted a child. It's almost a relief to send them away. They are clearly much more happy living in a stable environment, and as such, straight up avoid their father(s) from that point in. They are never really able to like one another.

Fulgrim: See that baby, and decide that this child is now their #1 priority. Somewhere between a dance mom and a karen, Fulgrim is also raising that kid with Ferrus, and thank god for that. He's very competant... But also, at the same time, only want the best for them. And that include the kid giving their best. The child mention like drawing exactly once? Paint master are brought in to teach them, and only the most luxurious of material are used. He knew what it's like growing up and having nothing, with no opportunity, and he never want his child to feel that way. A big problem is that his various anxiety also reflect on the kid, who get his own helping, and they just end up having monstrous, screaming argument at one another over like, the best color for a throw pillow. They both run very high on emotions and love one another very much, they just have a hair trigger tamper. Ferrus keep the peace between them, with his own kid. The two sibling don't see themself as twins, Ferrus child was declared the "oldest" by virtue of being taller. The two siblings bicker a lot, but it's in good humour.

.... God damn I wrote a novel. Idk, just. Parenthood inspire me I supose lmao. At this point im almost making oc.

[stellocchia]

Also. I propose that Wilbur, in complete contrast to techno "temperature is a lie I will wear a thin silk blouse and a furry Cape" blade, is one of those ppl who are always cold. Proof?

Lmanberg. Tommy? Wears a short sleeve T-Shirt. Tubbo? Wears a wrongly buttoned shirt. Those are things you wear for pretty warm weather. Not hot. But definitely not for anything even remotely cold. Wilbur? That fuckers wearing a sweater. That's warm. Like. That's what I wear outside in mid autumn and inside in winter. Like yeah it's not anything for the Arctic but if it was temperatures that someone else could wear a short T? I'd fucking suffocate in a sweater. Like. It's even called a sweater. He should be fucking sweating.

And in pogtopia he even puts on another layer on top of it. And like. That's an outfit I'd wear outside in late fall or fucking winter. Makes sense because pogtopia must've been cold as fuck (and Tommy still didn't get a jacket I'm gonna fucking cry) but he definitely dressed the warmest out of EVERYONE I remember.

Like. Nowadays we have tubbos snowchester skin which proofs that he's not a weirdo like Technoblade seems to be and just wears a shirt in a fucking snow biome. So we can assume that he perceives temperatures rather normally. And circling back to Wilbur's sweater skin. That means that Wilbur's a fucking frosty fuck.

Lil fucking freezing bitch

Someone make him a fucking campfire before he falls into some kind of frozen sleeping state like an insect.

Fuck him.

That does mean that c!Wilbur and c!Tommy are polar opposites in this though, because Tommy never seemed to struggle with the cold?

Like, he lived underground with only a t-shirt for months, never felt the need to wear anything heavier. He lived on a beach outside for MONTHS with only shredded clothes on him. And, then again, he only had on his t-shirt while living with Techno in the snowy tundra, albeit a patched-up version of it with no holes.

Like, if c!Wilbur is basically cold-blooded, c!Tommy is a living breathing furnace. Little sunshine boy, but taken very literally.

Somehow they still manage to coexist in the same space, but not without both of them being at least marginally uncomfortable.

[guynamedultimax]

What if Kirby had a traditional fighting game?

Listen, I know I should’ve done more “FNF fighting game characters” but i doubt anyone cared for that, and even then I lost a bit of interest, so if you actually cared sorry about that, you can still come up with whatever you want for the characters I didn’t talk about!

That being said, I think all Kirby fans here know Kirby Fighters 2. Personally speaking most of it was just the same as Kirby Fighters Deluxe BUT there were five playable Dream Friends. FIVE. Priority to the Copy Abilities a bit too high, isn’t it HAL? Sometimes it feels a bit barebones if you ask me. So I’m here to discuss what would a non-platform Kirby fighting game be.

THE GAMEPLAY

It’s the same as any basic fighting game, there isn’t really that much that the Kirby franchise can offer to make the genre a bit more varied, and that’s mostly due to the fact that Kirby makes friends wherever he goes and combat is pretty much straightforward in these platforming games, the crazy stuff comes from learning specific moves with each copy ability/character in the games and that’s also true for this game.

THE PLOT

I have quite a few ideas for how this can go:

-It’s a “what if” re-telling of Kirby Star Allies where Hyness’ ritual (somehow) also causes space-time rifts across the entire universe to be generated, pulling in Kirby villains from previous games but also allies, which would ALSO explain Dream Friends in the game’s canon a bit more properly.

-It happens in an AU. Plot would basically be Kirby Battle Royale’s but instead of shooting a loadshit of Kirbies onto Kirby, Dedede would just call upon all of their friends to fight for that cake before things escalate and Dedede loses control of the tournament to greater evils, forcing him to work with Kirby to stop the threat, be it old or new.

-Another AU idea but this time it’s original/based on Milky Way Wishes. Galactic NOVA appears every thousand years above Pop Star’s skies, and everyone tries to fight for the right to get the wish. Villain wouldn’t necessarily be ONLY Marx though, most of the Kirby villains could easily win against him if they get to NOVA and get their wish granted. Which means yes, all plots happen at once and Kirby has to deal with everyone at once.

-The least interesting idea: it’s Kirby Fighters 2′s plot but without tag team duos and with all Kirbies replaced with the roster.

THE ROSTER

Now we’re about to have some fun.

RETURNING CHARACTERS: The Dream Friends (and Kirby, of course)

-First up, all Dream Friends are coming back. You don’t even need to change their movesets that much, just add/tweak things, but just for funsies (and for a specific reason too) we’ll also give them specific copy abilities or more than one to categorize them.

-Kirby is the specific reason. He has the same moveset as his Smash Bros incarnation, although he incorporates more copy abilities (and also super powerful stuff like the Star Rod that he usually uses in endgame fights) in it now due to being a traditional fighting game. And yes, he still has his inhale. Using it will have the inhale be replaced by another move in-game, the closest one to a “neutral special” in the opponent’s arsenal. His copy ability is therefore, Smash Bros. And since the game has multiple super moves, we can make his gimmicks from the Kumazaki games the super moves: his level 1 would be a random Super Copy Ability from Return to Dreamland (cutscene is random everytime but damage is always the same), his level 2 would be using the Robobot Armor to stomp foes around, ending with a giant ground pound/fist to the ground and his level 3 is Hypernova Kirby due to the inhale being one of his most unique properties.

-Meta Knight and Dedede will also have heavy Smash influences but they’ll also use techniques from most of their boss fights, such as Meta Knight splitting himself in four clones temporarily for an attack or Dedede actually pulling out an axe instead of his hammer for some attacks based on his Triple Deluxe incarnation. Their copy abilities would formally be Sword and Hammer but with heavy Smash Bros inspiration. Meta can also call in for the Meta Knights to help him in one of his unique super moves. They’d all be there except for Sailor Dee and Captain Vul (one’s an alternate costume and the other is never seen outside of dialogue text).

-Bandana Waddle Dee’s moveset incorporates both Spear and Parasol, but due to the Spear being his most used tool he’ll be categorized with that.

-Marx is the first character with Unique as its own copy ability due to his arsenal being entirely based on his boss fight. Inhaling Unique characters doesn’t always allow Kirby to get copy abilities but when it happens he usually has their most basic move replacing the inhale. Gooey is in the same situation, but i have no idea what would Kirby get from him as an ability since he’s technically player 2 in the Dark Matter trilogy’s first 2 games. Rick, Kine and Coo would technically be categorized as Unique only because they have Fire, Water and Wind in their moveset. You could say they’d be stance characters while Marx is a zoner and Gooey a rushdown character.

-Dark Meta Knight is categorized as Mirror, and Adeleine (with Ribbon as an assist of course) is Artist. Daroach would be Animal, which is missing since its debut in Squeak Squad, as far as I can remember, but he naturally still retains his moveset of calling the Squeaks to help him.

-It’s pretty easy to categorize Magolor as ESP, and Taranza as Spider, while I have no idea what would Susie’s ability be even. Spark? She is mostly around in the Robobot Armor to be fair. The Three Mage-Sisters would be treated equally to the Animal Friends

THE NEWCOMERS

-NAGO, CHUCHU & PITCH: The other set of Animal Friends. I theorize a moveset revolving around the Cleaning ability like in Star Allies would be easy to make, although it can also incorporate moves from other abilities that have been in Dream Land 3.

-CHEF KAWASAKI: I think it’s safe to say this one is pretty easy to do just like the returning Dream Friends. He has a unique moveset in comparison to Chef Kirby that also has him use Kirby’s Final Smash from Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

-LOLOLO & LALALA: Aside from pushing boxes and Gordos they can be the Ice Climbers of the game, and most importantly one of their super moves could have them fuse into their original form in the anime to reference that further.

-SHADOW KIRBY: A clone (in terms of moveset) for Kirby that lacks the inhale ability and has more attacks based on his appearances in Amazing Mirror (and also on Kirby’s unique ability to split in four in these games) and the Kirby Fighters spinoffs. Simple as it is.

-THE MIDBOSSES: They all play the same as their fights too, so doing a paragraph for each of them would be a bit redundant. I chose to add minibosses in because most of them are pretty iconic among Kirby enemies and some of them are also technically friends of Kirby’s. I picked Bonkers (whose coconut throwing and some special moves could make him different enough from Dedede if you ask me), Mr. Frosty (also because we don’t have an Ice-based character in the game), Buggzy (which I can see being the ultimate grappler), King Doo (because we don’t actually have a Waddle Doo in the roster and he’s technically not only their king but also the most unique of them) and Grand Wheelie (look, I like Wheel as an ability ok? it’s like playing as Sonic in a Kirby game)

-KNUCKLE JOE: Taking stuff from both his Star Allies moveset and his Assist Trophy from Ultimate PLUS a few references to the anime and you have the ultimate Shoto character in the Kirby franchise. Ryu mains, this is the character for you.

-GIM: Look, my three favorite abilities are Yo-Yo, Wheel and ESP, in no particular order, so I HAD to include him and the Grand Wheelie. Magolor covers for ESP enough. This lil fella looks more unique than most of the generic Kirby enemies and even among the copy ability ones he’s always been a bit of an oddball due to being a robot. The trickshots you can do with this copy ability make Gim perfect to camp, so he’d be a pretty good zoner as well.

-TAC: He’s been a Helper in Super Star where he also has an unique moveset. Expanding on it and on Tac being generally a copy ability thief could mean more copy abilities can be implemented in a moveset, probably even more than what Kirby can do. Also his design just screams potential to me.

DLC FIGHTERS

WAVE 1: Spinoff Dream Friends

Cuz these guys have been done dirty by Star Allies’ devs. Elline would be the other Artist character in the game and call for Claycia’s assistance in specific attacks. Prince Fluff would play mostly just like Kirby himself did in Kirby’s Epic Yarn and implement specific transformations in some attacks, ending with the tank one from the end of that game. Then we have Gryll. If you know how to make a Tetris/Puyo Puyo based character in a fighting game then good for you, I absolutely don’t know how. What I KNOW however is that she has a float like Peach’s in Smash Bros and I-No’s in Guilty Gear.

WAVE 2: Dream Villains

These guys would all play exactly like their boss fights. Hyness and Sectonia would remain mostly unchanged while Haltmann in terms of moveset is the same as Susie, just without every non-Robobot move that she has.

WAVE 3: Clash of Blades

THAT’S RIGHT, IT’S ALL ANIME SWORDFIGHTERS. They all pull from their boss fights, but Morpho Knight is gonna be a bit more unique compared to Galacta, Dark Meta and Meta Knight, having in the swordfighter equivalent of Akuma’s Raging Demon. Meanwhile, Dark Matter Swordsman and Galacta Knight are completely faithful to the source material, but they’d probably be a bit nerfed due to Galacta’s universe-breaking powers. (you can bet that if we get the remaining legendary heroes who sealed Void Termina in future games they’d be their own separate Wave 5 DLC pack)

WAVE 4: Revival of Old Faces

Nightmare and Drawcia are back and they’re here to stay! Their movesets don’t really need that much changes. Void however is an entirely different beast. He’d be a mix of Kirby, both Zero incarnations and Dark Matter. His design wouldn’t just be giant orb that switches between Kirby and Dark Matter faces, he’d be Kirby-sized and with legs and stubby lil arms like the pink puffball. And you can bet your ass he’d be broken as fuck.

SKINS

If a character’s appearance changed across the series’ history (like Marx Soul, Girl Blob Gooey, Shoppe Magolor, Mecha Knight, Dark Taranza/Taranza in the Super Kirby Clash games, Masked/Shadow Dedede, Anime!Knuckle Joe, Parallel/Pres. Parallel Susie, EX versions and so on) they’d just be an alternate skin/palette swap for the specific character. Multiple characters of the same species with little changes (like a normal Waddle Dee or Sailor Dee, or literally all Kirby colors including Keeby) are the same. I’m also debating on how Dark Mind would be a skin for Nightmare or if there’d be a skin inspired by him for the Dark Matter Swordsman. Zero and Zero Two would probably be turned into palette swaps/outfits for Void (imagine a white Kirby cosplaying as Zero Two that’d be so cute lol).

ATTACKING ASSIST CHARACTERS

Characters who appear in other characters’ attacks. Like the aforementioned Squeaks, Meta Knights and Claycia. Normal Dark Matter would appear in DM Swordsman’s attacks in some capacity outside of the eye laser and the Gordo Throw would return from Dedede’s previous Smash incarnations alongside the Waddle Dee Throw from Brawl. And naturally Magolor can call in the Lor Starcutter for one of his super moves. I am actually considering giving Tac the ability to throw random items/enemies at opponents, with the Bomber being one of these. It’d be a very RNG attack with the Bomber being the best outcome, blowing on the opponent’s face.

HELPERS

All characters in the game can be called on for an Helper attack, that can help you in some form against the opponent by either damaging or tampering with the opponent or by having you get healed or with some buff. Outside from the playable roster enemies that give you copy abilities would also be Helpers, but the specific ones I’m not so sure on.

BOSSES

Characters you can fight in Arcade mode, in Story mode or in a specific Boss mode. There’d also be a Ganon’s Fury (Hyrule Warriors) inspired mode where you’d play as the bosses pitting them against each other. I specifically picked Dyna Blade, Whispy Woods, Landia, Star Dream, Kracko, Great Edge, Pyribbit, Ice Dragon, Fire Lion, Masher, Grand Mam, Metal General, Kibble Blade and Pon & Con.

STAGES

There’d be quite a lot of stages, but I haven’t thought out specific ones except for Green Greens, Butter Building, a Ripple Star stage, one for Dedede’s castle with stage cameos by Tiff, Tuff and Escargoon from the anime and every final boss’s fighting arena.

THE MUSIC

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is gonna be nothing compared to this one. We’re getting all the important music from all pre-Kumazaki games, all music from Kumazaki games and spinoffs, and online arrangements with focus on orchestral (Desolo Zantas), metal (GaMetal, of course) and EDM (Acid Notation, Qumu and various others), including stuff like Itoki Hana’s vocal arrangements. We’re going all out on this one.

Aaaaand that’s it. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. Stay hydrated.

[gyllenhaalstories]

imagine taking rapper jake home to meet your parents.

i’m so sorry for the delay, anon! <3 buckle up, it got long and i’m emo!!!!! lil jakey jakes meeting your parents was not something i thought i’d cry about right now but here i am. i listened to nothing’s gonna hurt you baby by cigarettes after sex if you want to vibe with me!

<3

jake swore he was about to shit his pants when you reminded him of the dinner with your parents.

he ran all over his house, searching for nothing and everything at oncel. one second it was his tie, the next his phone and after that his keys. he was just so terrified. he wanted to leave a good impression.

he dressed up like he was going to the oscars. he put on a suit, a new one he got tailored to his body just for the occasion. he covered all of his tattoos, with those long sleeves. he hid his chain under the color of the shirt you buttoned lovingly. he went to the barbershop too, he got a fresh cut and his beard neat. he looked like a movie star and even if this was not the man with whom you fell in love, you still loved this new persona.

“you’re so stressed that i’m stressed” you’d scream at him while he paced around the bedroom as you put on a simple outfit, some jeans and a button up shirt too. dresses felt too formal. it was your parents, not the pope. “we’re not going. i’m calling them and i’ll say i’m sick”.

jake stopped moving and protested. “if i wanna ask your father for your hand, i better know how he looks like first. if he likes golf, i’m out”.

the joke was unexpected, but it made both of you laugh. he kept bringing up marriage. it was like a running gag, but it felt more and more real. one day you would be called mrs gyllenhaal. and this day would not happen if you died from a heart attack because you couldn’t face the judgement of your parents.

so jake waited for you in the car. he picked a black jaguar, he didn’t want to be too obnoxious. he had the head lights shining bright and blinked them so you pretended to walk like a model and twirl in front of the car before you sat on the passenger seat. “so fuckin’ gorgeous.” jake said and noticed you, too, wore the chain he got you for your birthday. he stretched his arm out to play with it lightly and then proceeded to drive to your parents’ house.

he stopped in the drive way. it was a tiny home, very old with a bunch of flower pots that were wrapped up for the winter. it was lovely already. jake stopped the car and took deep breaths.

“you sound like you’re about to get into labor”

“it’s a neat trick you’ll have to try it”

and you both breathed fast like two freaks in the car while the music was playing in the background. some U2 song. it calmed the two of you down. when you got out of the car, jake immediately grabbed your hand. he needed the comfort.

you were about to ring the door bell when your mother slammed the door open and wrapped you in a tight hug.

jake smiled and looked behind her. he waved at your father.

“mom, dad, this is my boyfriend, jake. jake, this is my mom and dad.”

“hi mom, hi dad” jake replied and it made the two of them laugh.

jake wanted to bring champagne and flowers, but you convinced him to not do too much. your parents were simple people. they would be happy as long as jake didn’t tease you from under the table (the jeans were definitely a good option) or mentioned politics. 

“our daughter has told us a lot about you” your mother said “yeah, we heard you are a singer? isn’t that the dream” your father added

“yeah.” jake smiled awkwardly and took a sip from the glass of water you both shared. you were sitting on his lap, on the love seat of the small living room. your parents asked him tons of questions. he answered them genuinely. he asked them questions too. he was relieved to find out your father preferred hockey to golf.

you sat around the table. it was weird that the fourth chair of the dining table was finally used.

none of your previous relationships lasted long enough to reach this level of intimacy. sex was one thing, but meeting your parents? that was a HUGE deal.

jake behaved like the best man in the world. he complimented the food. it was just simple spaghetti and storebought garlic bread. but it tasted like love and home. he asked for two other plates. your mom even reached to wipe his chin from the tomato sauce.

it filled him with joy. he had a tough relationship with his own family and he felt like he fit right in with yours.

you watched jake with heart eyes. he was so happy to explain his art and craft to your father who kept asking him if he had met blake shelton or the backstreet boys. you know, hip people. jake laughed and shook his head. he didn’t bother explaining that he sang about filthy things the two of you did. he was happy they considered his job as valid. he was not a carpenter or a doctor. but he was happy to spoil you nonetheless.

“you’re doing great” you’d whisper to jake.

everything was fine. until your mom pulled out the baby photos albums. THE SHAME.

“look at that tiny baby booty!” jake pointed and melted. “toohtless! that gums only look, can’t wait to see it again when we’re old and grumpy.” he pulled out a photo. you were wearing matching ugly yellow zipped hoodie and plaid pants. you were holding a teddy bear of the same colour as the one he got you for your birthday. behind the photography it was written happy y/n at the park with her best friend. he asked if he could keep it. your parents agreed. (it was his phone home screen from now on, your lock screen being a post sex glow photo when he could see a tiny drop of cum at the corner of your eye, it was still cute to him). “so she’s always been bad at cooking?” he said and laughed when you found a picture of you and your grandparents where you held a plate of burnt cookies. “hey, not cool! i was only seven!” you pushed him gently. “look at you now, you burn bread in the toaster”. your parents were the ones who melted now.

“so, jacob...”

jake insisted that it was fine your father called him by his full name.

the two of you were so stressed out. the tone of your father’s voice was suddenly heavy and scary.

“yeah?”

“does it hurt to get tattoos?”

jake squinted and you coughed loud enough to cover the whispered what the fuck that came out of his open mouth. his sleeves were rolled up and exposing the ink. “i mean, yeah, it hurts a lot. it’s worth it though. i feel like an art collector.”

“in my young days, i’ve always wanted a tattoo. i got the concept. this lovely lady as a pin up girl, quite impressive, huh?.” he winked at your mom who blushed while you tried everything you could not to throw up.

jake rolled his sleeve a little higher and pointed at a spot near the veins of the inside of his arm, close to the elbow. he got the outline of a heart tattooed. you noticed how wobbly the lines were, that’s because it was the heart you always drew at the end of your notes that you left him when you were gone or when he was out working. “that’s my favourite.”

THE WAY YOU JUST BURST INTO TEARS and your mom shouted “time for dessert!”

great timing.

“our daughter told us you loved m&m’s”.

jake turned to look at you. you shrugged.

your mother came back with chocolate cake on which she had sprinked crushed m&m pieces on the frosting.

jake asked to get the biggest slice. “that’s the best fuckin’ cake i’ve had in my whole life.” (which was a lie because the best cake was your ass but details) he said, his mouth full. your mother laughed and your father agreed. they began talking about hockey when your mother asked for your help in the kitchen.

“if we learned anything from you,” she started and handed you a plate to dry. you hated to do the dishes, especially if you were to be lectured like a child. “it’s to never judge people by their covers. we love jake. he’s good to you. you’re good to him.”

you hugged your mom and the two of you cried so loudly that jake dropped his spoon. he thought something bad happened. that you cut yourself with the butter knife or something.

“welcome to the family, jake.” your father squeezed jake’s shoulder as you walked back to him to press a kiss on his cheek.

it was now time to leave, after hours and hours of anecdotes from your childhood or from the time you were convinced you’d marry brad pitt or when you put eyeshadow in your hair to act like you dyed them to be punk but it was raining that day and you came back looking like a sad frosty rainbow.

“you’re my favourite person.” jake told you when he gave you his vest as a coat. it was chilly outside.

you all hugged and shook hands, promising to come back soon for brunch. jake told them he’d make his famous pancakes.

“hold on!” jake exclaimed and pulled you by the arm. you followed him back in the kitchen and he fed you a spoon of the cake. you fed him one in return again. “tastes almost as good as your pussy” he whispered in your ear and kissed your chocolate covered lips.

you finally left the house, waving from the car at your parents who stood on the porch. they seemed satisfied. and you? you had never been more in love.

“can’t wait to rip those tight jeans off your body and fuck you like a bitch.” jake winked and started to drive away. “i’m looking forward to the toothless viagra boosted blowjobs too, that’s gonna feel divine.” 

you slapped his thigh and he moaned in pain. you rested your hand there and he brought it to his lips, planting a soft kiss.

“welcome to the family.” you repeated.

[scratchbandicoot]

Based on this lovely lil thing

He swears on all the comedy shows he’s ever watched, this would be the exact moment where things would freeze frame, record scratch, and insert corny line, like, “Hi, I’m Steve, you’re probably wondering how i got here-“

And normally, in a situation like this one, it wouldn’t at all be the case. Baking is like, a seriously mundane thing a lot of people do. Mostly housewives, grandmas or kids with their parents but it just so happens that Steve is the one doing the baking right now- and it should have gone without a hitch. So, 20 minutes of digging into the cabinets of his mom’s cook books- he began. He wanted it to be good, not a cop out box of mix because making it from scratch makes it more special. And it’s a fucking cake; how hard could it really be?

Apparently super fucking hard actually. Because what should have been a completely mundane, simple task that takes like 40 minutes tops- Steve was left with this. Referring to the absolute disaster that is his kitchen. There’s like, 8 eggshells scattered all over the countertop- one somehow ending up on the floor and another on his knee. There is a spilling bag of sugar on its side creating a hectic little pile that leaks onto the stove top- (Thank god for his parents expensive ass glass-top stoves.) Somehow he managed to spill olive oil around the sink when the recipe doesn’t even call for it- and to top it all off there is flour covering every inch of the kitchen and himself. The apron he has on does absolutely nothing, the powder covering his pastel blue cashmere button up- and he’s sure he somehow managed to get flour on places where the sun don’t shine. He’s three hours 45 minutes deep at this point and he knows he’s literally about to cry. He can feel his eyes burning with frustration and a huge lump tightening his throat with the threat of unshed tears. How did he get to this point? Well, lets backtrack.

It’s Billy’s birthday tomorrow . Steve has always done something special on Billy’s birthdays- even though he is like, super weird about gifts and being given things. Seriously, last time Steve gave Billy just a dumb little birthday card with snoopy dancing, and text that read ‘a big-smiling, fun-having, great-feeling birthday’- his nose srunched up like he had to sneeze and he gave the most awkward thanks followed by a back pat that- felt so absolutely “hiya pal” that Steve cackled out loud to the point he was in tears. Billy just burned red and sputtered all irritated, “Stop fucking laughing, Harrington.” Guy just cannot handle shows of affection.

This though, was a little more special. A little more personal than a rinky-dink peanuts birthday card- because billy really loved confetti cake. It brought back memories of his mom; how they used to bake the cake together on his younger birthdays, and how much he really missed it. Nothing could really beat the warmth of those memories, or the fondness painting Billy’s face when he recalled them- but goddamit- steve was gonna try, was trying, his actual best. He even convinced Keith that he’d take his next Saturday shift if he let him off the hook today to do this. His nonna had baked with him when he was young-like, 6- so he figured he’d pick it back up. Which was so not the case here. It’s safe to say he is more than a little rusty. So rusty in fact, that his old bike that he got for his 12th birthday that sits in the garage decaying and untouched, had absolutely nothing on him right now.

The first try was peppy; with a shimmy of hips and a waving whisk to the song playing from the sound system in the living room, and Steve thought genuinely that he did it right. He might have, maybe, with the recipe, but the lump of coal that was pulled out of the oven indicated heavily to the opposite. The smoke in the kitchen made Steve cough and gag, having to open up all the windows along with the screen door. The second attempt was a different outcome. Terrible, but different. A cake with singed edges and a liquidy inside that stuck to the pan and got scraped out with an uncermonious plop into the garbage. Mush, really, something akin to the texture of apple sauce. The third attempt Steve really focused, he swears, but that just ended up with a cake that didnt even rise and he was back to square 1 before he knew it with a beautifully new sense of defeat.

So, before he had an actual mental break over a goddamn cake he knew 7 year olds could make better, he called up Ms. Henderson for help. The lady is practically a god when it comes to baking and he really does not know how she does it. Whips out cookies and tarts and cupcakes like it’s going out of style.

“Hmm...oh! Sweetie, I think it might be the cornstarch. It sinks to the bottom of the pan if you don’t add baking soda- did you add baking soda?”

Steve glances at the forgotten unopened box of baking soda leaned against the stoves backsplash. He slaps himself mentally.

“Um, no. No i did not do that.”

“Well then, that’s it! You simply forgot a key ingredient is all. Not a big deal in the slightest.” Ms. Henderson was always very sweet to steve. Maybe because Dustin had become a little brother to him, but she never ever made him feel dumb. Always assured him mistakes are simply human.

“Right, right, yeah. I’ll add that. Thank you Ms. Henderson.” Steve goes to run a hand through his hair but is met with the headband pulling Steve’s hair from his eyes.

“Its Claudia sweetie, you know that.” Steve could hear the smile in her voice. She makes him feel better.

She gave a few more tips, how just white sugar might dry out the cake when used too much and using brown sugar will make the cake’s texture fluffier. He thanks her and hangs up with a sigh. Back to work.

He follows each step meticulously, following Claudia’s directions to a T and slips it into the oven; prays to god that this will be the last time he tries this. He’s only got one egg left and the overly sweet assortment of smells is starting to make him nauseous. After 45 excruciating minutes, Steve huffs and pulls out the cake. It looks... actually it looks like a cake. He smiles crookedly- holding his breath as he slips the cake onto the tray. It comes out in one piece, albeit lopsided, Steve whoops. He finally fucking did it- the cake actually looks like a confetti cake- and Steve is just so fucking proud of it, already going in to make the frosting before theres a ring at the door.

He frowns, wiping the flour on his watch head. It’s midnight- 12:07 am. Jesus christ, he started this at 7 pm, he didn’t even realize-

He hurries up to the door trying to wipe off the flour and make himself semi presentable. The door swings open and it’s Billy. He’s holding a six pack of Natural Light and a smirk that warps into a surprised raise of his eyebrows at Steve’s current state. He’s sure he must like he just ran a drug cartel or something.

“Hi, pretty boy.” Billy says as he walks in, checking Steve up and down. “Whats uh, whats up with your threads? Look like you jumped head first into coke or got real personal with Frosty the Snowman”

Stve rolls his eyes. His breath catches when he sees Billy start walking to the kitchen. He runs and blocks Billy in the doorway.

“You can’t go in there.”

Billy frowns, “What, you actually got drugs in there or somethin’?”

“No- you just- you can’t go in there. Not allowed.”

“Cmon baby whatcha got in there?” Billy starts to nudge past him; never was good at waiting.

“Wait, no- Billy- don’t-“

Billy takes in the state of the kitchen with a confused look and low whistle before his eyes land on the unfrosted confetti cake sitting on the kitchen island in all it’s lopsided glory. He freezes.

Steve waddles up behind him; following his gaze as he chews on his lip.

“I’m sorry, didn’t have time to make the frosting. Wanted it to be a surprise.” Steve scratches the nape of his neck sheepishly.

Billy’s still just standing there, and for a moment Steve is afraid he overstepped. That he was hijacking a moment from Billy’s mom that was only okay to do if she did it. He tries to get a read on Billy from his side profile since Billy is only turned slightly towards him but he can’t. A few more seconds of Billy standing there- and what Steve hopes is stunned silence- before Billy quietly murmurs,

“You made me a confetti cake?”

Steve holds his breath after a strained little, “Yeah.” The unshed tears from earlier are threatening to fall again, “You said you loved confetti cake, and that it made you happy. Wanted to make you happy.”

Billy spins on his heel fast, catching Steve’s face in his hands and lips with his own. Steve’s heart bursts and jerks a little with the surprise. It’s a chaste thing, just a press of lips, before Billy pulls away.

“You’re so... you just...” Billy trailed off and it was, like, a huge thing for Steve in that moment. Billy? Speechless? Steve never thought he’d see the day. It makes his face heat but his heart full and he beams.

“I’m... what?” He draws out.

“Fuckin’- somethin’. You’re somethin’ else.” Billy tugs him in by the waist and uses the other hand to swipe at the flour on Steve’s cheek. He looks so goddamn fond it makes Steve’s heart rate skyrocket.

“Is it okay?”

Billy hums, “It’s so okay. So much better than okay.”

He presses sweet little kisses to Steve’s lips and Steve can’t stop smiling.

“Well,” he says between pecks, “I wanted to do something special.”

Billy hums again, kisses trailing pepper like to his cheeks, his forehead, his nose and now down his neck.

Steve fights down the urge to shiver as he wraps his arms around the other’s shoulders. But-then he feels a wetness at the crook of his neck and makes a soft concerned noise at the back off his throat. He tugs Billy gently off and is met with blue, glassy eyes. Billy was tearing up.

“Thank you.” Billy says wetly, gently, before hugging Steve tight. “God- i- thank you.”

Steve smiles sweetly, hands going into Billy’s hair. He doesn’t ask because he doesn’t need to. Knows that this is Billy being happy, knows that this isn’t bad, knows Billy. Loves Billy.

Steve pokes Billy’s sides- grins, “Happy birthday, baby.” And punctuates it with a kiss.

[masquerade-story]

Chapter 4 - Memories

Lillian awoke late into the evening, after everyone collectively agreed to take a nap and process everything Crystal told them. Her throat was dry and scratchy, so she carefully rolled out of bed to avoid disturbing Grey, who'd crawled into her bed for comfort like he always did when he was upset, and padded quietly out of the bedroom.

Since there wasn't going to be any sort of heating bill, they'd left the mysteriously working heater on to combat the unexpectedly cold weather. Lillian stopped by a window to peek outside, and was momentarily startled when she could pick out individual leaves on distant trees.

"Right, our vision got all fancy." Lillian laughed softly at herself, turning her gaze from the trees to the starry sky.

An unfamiliar sky.

Three moons scattered across the horizon, a couple of planets close enough for their rings to be distinct to the naked eye, and a brilliant aurora ribbon streaming across more stars than Lillian ever remembered seeing when she looked up back on Earth.

"There's no North Star," she whispered to herself, her warm breath briefly melting some frost on the window glass. "Different constellations, different horoscopes... I wonder how long a year is here? Or a season? Can we... Even communicate with people to find out?"

An oppressive sense of loneliness settled in her chest. Lillian blinked back a few tears and turned away from the window, resuming her earlier mission of a glass of juice. She slipped downstairs into the kitchen, drank an entire glass, and went to bring her second cup upstairs in case she woke up again, when a soft sound caused her to pause mid-step toward the stairs.

Sobbing. Wretched, mournful sobbing, from the living room which currently had no light on.

Lillian felt her heart clench in sympathy, and changed route.

Rayne sat on the couch, curled into the corner with a blanket around her shoulders and a phone in her hands. She glanced up when Lillian approached, hurriedly dashing her tears with the corner of the blanket. "H-hey, what's up?"

Lillian had the sense to put her juice cup down on an end table before sitting heavily on the couch, encroaching on Rayne's personal space with reckless abandon. "I was gonna ask you the same thing. Why are you down here alone in the dark?"

"Oh, I..." Rayne muttered, her gaze flicking back to the phone. Lillian glanced down, and saw a photo of Rayne and her boyfriend trying on mouse hats during their trip to Disneyworld. His expression was exasperated, but his affectionate gaze was fixed on Rayne's laughing face.

Rayne locked her screen and set the phone down, but it was too late and she knew it. She retreated further into the warmth of her blanket, faking a shiver to cover the fact she was trying to hide her face.

Neither Rayne nor Crystal appreciated it when other people saw them cry, but Lillian knew that it was sometimes exactly what someone needed, whether they wanted it or not. So she leaned on Rayne's shoulder, resting a gentle hand on the other woman's knee.

"You know," Lillian said softly, closing her eyes. "There's three moons."

Rayne was quiet for a moment. Then she sniffled, before whispering: "Really?"

"Yeah. And some ringed planets, and an aurora. Wanna see?"

The bundle of blanket shook in a hesitant nod, and both Lillian and Rayne moved to sit on the window seat overlooking the front yard, keeping throw pillows between them and the frozen glass to seal in their bodily warmth.

Silence stretched on between them as they stared together at the foreign night sky. Whenever Rayne gave a soft cry or pained whimper, Lillian reached over to squeeze her hand without turning to look at her, giving the other woman a measure of privacy while still providing comfort until she was ready to talk.

"It's unfair," Rayne whispered finally, reaching out of the blanket to draw a frowning face on the frosty glass.

Lillian nodded. "It ate our bonds so they all forgot us, but we still have to remember them? It's totally unfair."

"Actually..." Rayne looked over, locking gazes with Lillian, her dark brow furrowed. "That's the thing. Lils, do you remember your parents?"

"Of course. Robin and Larry-"

"Their faces, Lils."

Lillian opened her mouth, then immediately shut it. Her curious expression turned to one of realization, then panic suffused with horror. "No, I... What...?"

"I don't remember his face if I'm not looking at the photo," Rayne said, crossing her arms tightly under the blanket. "I don't remember his voice anymore. I did at first, but... Every passing moment, it's harder to remember the times we shared. The bad, the good. Even while looking at the photos! And I just... I felt like I should have a good cry, while I still felt enough lingering emotion for him to do it."

Lillian felt as though her heart was caught in her throat. She swallowed, swallowed again, then wheezed as she tried to remember how to breathe. Rayne hurriedly wrapped her arms around Lillian's shoulder, squeezing tight in a hug that contained all her comfort and sympathy.

"We'll do everything we can to remember, them, okay?" Rayne whispered, her voice shaking with emotion. "Let's go wake Grey and Crystal, then we can all start writing stuff down. Alright?"

Nodding, Lillian clung desperately to Rayne's hand as they both hurried upstairs, rolling their respective siblings out of bed for an emergency meeting. Grey's horror was contrasted starkly by Crystal's numb nodding, as she apologized for not realizing it would happen. They dug into the boxes of personal belongings, finding some notebooks and pens, and sat together in the master bedrooms writing down everything they remembered about Earth and their loved ones until well into the next morning.

"On the one hand it's a mercy," Grey said sleepily, as he doodled another picture of his parents in the margins of his notebook. "So we won't be grieving our loss very long, I guess? But it still feels..."

"Wrong," Lillian mumbled, looking through her phone for a picture of her cat to use as a reference.

"It's not like the time was wasted," Rayne said, adding another bullet point to the list she was writing. "Our experiences shaped who we are whether we remember them or not. It does feel pretty crappy, though..."

"I wonder, will they forget us like this?" Lillian asked, unable to stop the words in her heart from escaping. Her hand paused above the page, the pen in her hand shaking violently. "Will they just... Slowly forget us? Or was it sudden and merciful? Because this... This is cruel."

"Cruelty implies intention," Crystal said softly, her voice shaking almost as much as Lillian's pen. "That... Thing. The Eater. It didn't have any malice, it was just hungry. But I dunno if that makes things better or worse..."

"I dunno man, you ever seen a cat catching prey? Pretty sure eating something alive has some inherent malice in it." Grey grumbled, trying to force his chicken scratch handwriting into something legible.

Crystal, who'd already given up on her own handwriting and embraced the chaotic glyphic nature of her lettering, nodded sagely in agreement. "That's true. I got the impression the Eater wasn't exactly sentient or sapient though. More like a force than a being, if that makes sense? Or maybe I just can't conceive of it, since that thing exists outside our dimensions of understanding."

"You say that so easily, do you even know how wild that whole statement was?"

"Do you even know how wild this whole situation is?"

"Look, we've passed absurdity at this point. Now I'm just down with whatever weirdness comes our way."

"We don't have to pay bills anymore," Rayne said slowly, staring at her paper. Her handwriting was the neatest by far, and she'd finished writing down most important events she could think of, but she kept having a nagging feeling she'd left something out so she kept reading the pages over and over hoping to trigger another memory. "We won't have to buy groceries unless there's things we want specifically that wasn't in our house to begin with. The electricity will never go out, damage to the property will be repaired, and even though we're in a new world with unknown levels of development and technology, we will never have to worry about toilet paper. In exchange for a very comfortable standard of living, we lost our connection to our home and families."

"Personally speaking I think it's fair," Crystal said with a scoff. "But that's because our family sucks so I'll be glad to forget them. All my most important people are here with me! I know Robin and Larry will take good care of all our cats, my exes all sucked, and my other friends will get along just fine without me. I don't have anyone to worry about, just regrets for stuff I never got to do. Like visiting the Grand Canyon, or going on a long cruise."

"I wanted to hike around Europe someday..." Rayne said wistfully.

"I wanted to vacation in the tropics. Or maybe Spain? For like, two years. With some hot guys and infinite fruity alcohols." Grey said, staring off into space with a dreamy look in his eyes.

"I wanted to be famous enough for us to visit the space station," Lillian sighed. Grey snorted, and everyone started laughing in a combination of absurdity and delirium from lack of sleep. They started listing everything they could think of, starting with shopping sprees and game show appearances, and ending with complex bank and casino heists to dismantle capitalism.

When Crystal started dozing off while sitting up, they all agreed to get some sleep for real. The notebooks were stacked lovingly on one of the end tables, which reminded Lillian to run downstairs and chug her long-forgotten cup of juice in the living room before trudging back upstairs into bed.

------

"We can't just stay in the house forever, right?" Grey muttered as he stared out the living room window later that night, curled up on the window seat with his knees hugged to his chest.

"Technically we could," Rayne said, drumming her fingers against the recliner arm as she waited for her laptop to boot. "Infinite food and basic supplies, stuff for our hobbies... We have our instruments, we have our computers and game consoles and several external drives worth of movies and books and music since you and Crystal obsessively insist on collecting or hoarding anything of interest for later use."

"Hey, hey." Grey wagged a finger and feigned an offended scowl. "Look at our situation. How bored would we be if the two of us didn't hoard everything? In fact, maybe our desire to hoard entertainment was preparing for this day!"

"Damn psychics always preparing for everything they couldn't possibly know about," Rayne muttered rebelliously, and Crystal laughed. She'd stretched out on half of the corner couch taking up an entire section of the living room by itself, looking cozy with a pile of blankets and her special edition Switch.

"It's only gonna get worse from here, Ray."

"Open your town, I need to sell my oranges," Lillian interrupted, nudging Crystal's feet from her spot on the other side of the corner couch.

"Alright, lemme finish making this waterfall first."

"Your villagers are never gonna have scurvy again for like, three generations."

"That many oranges? Isn't that a bit overkill?"

"If they don't want an entire island nation's agricultural sector's worth of citrus they should learn to adjust their economy for inflation."

"You know the shop is run by literal children, right?"

"It's good to learn early that nepotism leads to ruin. The business world is harsh and so am I."

Rayne chuckled at the sound of Lillian's low, malicious cackling, but her expression swiftly turned serious. "What do you mean it's gonna get worse, Coco?"

"All four of us have abilities for real, right? Being in this world is gonna make them grow exponentially, whether we try to train them or not. New ones will pop up too, or existing ones will change a little as they grow. Okay Lils, gate's open." Crystal spoke nonchalantly, but every word drained a bit more color from Rayne's face. Meanwhile, Grey turned away from the window with an excited glint in his eyes.

"So psychic powers can get real strong in this world?"

"Yeah. The impression I got when we were coming over was... Magic exists here, and it's something anyone can learn to use with practice. But abilities like ours, psychic powers? Those you have to be born with, and it's rare. That's about as much as I know about it though," Crystal sighed and shrugged.

"Can you list everything you know about our situation?" Rayne said, opening a new document on her computer and typing away with her nose inches from the laptop screen. "I wanna write it all down. I got the thing about our bonds and memories, and the house being indestructible-"

"It's not indestructible, just protected." Crystal seemed startled as soon as the words left her mouth, as though the information was somehow new. She furrowed her brow, nose wrinkling as she carefully examined her thought process. "I see, protected... Like a barrier, almost? It'll always rebuild itself and restock supplies overnight no matter what happens, even if it's all burnt to ash, but the property itself is also shielded unless we draw attention from a big threat."

"A big threat? Like what?"

"I don't know. Big animals like those Nessies on the beach yesterday. Or monsters like the Eater, maybe?"

"Monsters?!" Lillian sat up straight, pulling her feet under her body. "There's monsters!?"

"There's magic, why wouldn't there be monsters too?" Grey pointed out, but his twin just stuck her tongue out at him.

"It's just an assumption," Crystal hurriedly explained. "For my power to work, I'd have to come into contact with stuff related to what I want to know about in order to get more information, I can't just pull stuff out of the ether whenever I have questions!"

"Then how do you know what you know already?"

"Well, we were in contact with the house. The house is made with really powerful magic, so I learned magic exists, and that it was used to make the house echo and ensure our supplies remain the same. I think I also learned about the barrier then, but didn't think about it or really absorb the info cuz I was thinking about other things, so it only just popped up." Crystal shrugged and let out a half-hearted laugh.

"What about the Eater?"

"The Eater was menacing us directly and I looked at it so I was able to get some info on it and the bond-eating shenanigan, but not much else because it's way stronger than me, I think? And my power activated as soon as we started our... Transfer, I guess? Away from Earth. And you all were in the room with me, so I knew you all had powers as well as myself, got the basic gist of how mine work, and that we'd all get much stronger whether we wanted to or not. That's really about it for what I know. I told you it wasn't much."

"Why the house though?" Rayne muttered. "It just wanted to eat our bonds and it did that. So why did it drop us on another planet, and why give us this cushy house echo thing?"

Crystal shrugged again. "I honestly have no idea. I think I could know if I got a lot stronger, but... That won't be any time soon. I can tell there's a reason, though. I just dunno what."

"Maybe it's compensation?" Grey said, his expression hopeful.

"Or bait, like a beacon, so it can find us again..." Lillian whispered with a shiver, and everyone's faces fell. Seeing their reactions, she hurriedly straightened her spine and forced a smile to her face. "But it didn't hurt us, and we're all still together. Imagine if we'd been flung to different planets instead of staying together!"

"That'd really suck," Grey agreed. "So like, Crystal, your power activates if you come into contact with stuff?"

"I think so. I'd have to test it to get the hang of how things work, precisely."

Grey chuckled, a mischievous grin spreading across his face. His expression made the three women exchange worried glances, especially once he started rubbing his hands together like a two-bit cartoon villain. "Looks like we got ourselves an excuse to head to that town for some reconnaissance!"

"In the snow?" Rayne asked, raising her eyebrows.

"With only summer clothes in our wardrobes," Crystal pointed out.

"We wore hiking boots for the walk up here so that'd be fine, but the warmest clothes we have right now are..." Lillian trailed off, then suddenly doubled over and started giggling.

Realization dawned on the others soon after, and Rayne covered her face with her hands. "Oh no."

"Oh yes!" Grey hissed, pumping his fist into the air. "That'll make one heck of an entrance, wouldn't it?"

"Our music video costumes? In PUBLIC!?" Rayne wailed while the others laughed.

"That might not be what we want to do though," Crystal said after her moment of laughter had subsided. "We don't know what kind of world this is. If they'll be friendly to strangers, especially ones who can't speak their language - or any language on this world. They won't know English, you know."

"But do we really have a choice?" Lillian asked, putting down her console and staring up at the ceiling. "We don't know anything about this world. About magic, except that it exists. About the people. And hiding here in our safe cozy house will be fine short term, but what about long term? Are we gonna spend our whole lives holed up in here?"

"I, for one, embrace the forest witch hermit lifestyle," Grey said. "And I know Crystal does too."

"Sure do. Cottage life."

Rayne sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I don't wanna be caught completely off guard by whatever nonsense comes our way. We know it's winter, but we don't know what the other seasons are like yet. What if they have a raining magma and diamonds from the sky season? We can't apply Earth logic here! Or if we can, we don't know to what extent! There were dinosaurs on the beach!"

"That's a fair point. There were indeed dinosaurs on the beach. Counter points?"

"There were dinosaurs on the beach."

"A fair counter point as well. I do want to see the dinosaurs up close."

"From a safe distance."

"Up close from a safe distance, of course."

"Plus, we don't know what's gonna happen with our powers. You said they'll get stronger, what does that mean?"

"I don't know. More powers will manifest, I think? And the ones we have already will be more potent. But I don't know how potent, or what exactly will happen."

"Exactly! You psychically downloaded only a little info about our situation and it gave you a nasty seizure! Right?"

"Pretty much."

"So what if something worse happens? A big huge infodump? If you can't control your powers, or shut it off when needed or whatever, what if..." Rayne's shoulders sagged.

"What if I have a big seizure every time I use my powers now?" Crystal finished, a wry smile on her face. "Yeah, I was wondering about that too. Honestly, everything about our situation has me so terrified I've circled back around to just feeling numb about it all."

"That's a hell of a mood," Grey sighed, stretching out on the window seat and propping his feet up against the wall. "Everything's happening so much, am I right? It's hard to be freaked out about everything simultaneously. It's easier to just phase out of existence, mentally speaking."

"I... Have an idea."

Everyone turned to look at Lillian, who sat perched on the edge of the couch. She glanced at all their faces, then offered a shy smile.

"Well? What's your idea, sis?" Grey encouraged, when his sister kept fidgeting in place instead of finishing her thought.

"Well, those warmer clothes we have... They're our costumes, right? And Crystal said we dunno how people would react to that sort of outfit, or to strangers in general, but what if... I mean... We have our instruments? What if... We pretended to be minstrels?"

[ill-skillsgard]

JimmyJammmmmm I just got my grade back for my trigonometry final exam and it’s a C... depending on my grades for the last two assignments I turned in (my prof. hasn’t graded them yet) I could fail trig altogether 😩😭 am sad, am very very sad. If you wouldn’t mind... could you pretty please maybe write me a lil thingy about how frosty Fausty would make Faith feel better after failing a class?? If not, that’s okay! 😁 Just thought I’d ask. 🖤🖤 Ps. How was your trip? 😇

Sorry for the delay, my dear. I’m the worst! I hope your verdict isn’t as crappy as I am! My vacay was nice, but not long enough! I need approximately 762405 more days off! Hehe  😁 

Here’s a little drabble of Faust comforting Faith after she fails a big test.

+

“No... No! You don’t understand. My parents will kill me!” She cried.

Faust set down his beer bottle, twisting his mouth at his girlfriend who had spent the better half of their night together pacing and fretting. He finally sighed, shaking his head, and reached his hand out until she came to him and sat on his knee.

“Your parents will not kill you. At most, you’ll disappoint them. And you’re already with me, so how much more disappointed could they get?”

She opened her mouth, but he barred her words with one finger pressed against her lips.

“Please, I love you, but you need to stop worrying. You think one test is gonna get you kicked out or something?”

“Uh, no, but multiple failed tests might cause me to flunk the class.”

Faust smirked in that dangerous way that made her chest flutter. “Maybe you shouldn’t spend so much time hanging out with trash like me. You could actually get some work done.”

She wanted to snap back, but Faust was right. Their relationship took precedence over everything else in her life, and she’d feared it would come back to nip her. Now she was suffering the consequences of too many nights spent in his bedroom not studying. She only had herself to blame.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” she sighed, hopping off his lap.

Making her way to the door, she stuffed her feet into her shoes while Faust watched, confused.

“Where are you going?”

“You said it yourself... I need to study more, and I can’t possibly pay attention to my reading with so many distractions.”

Faust opened his mouth but stumbled over a malformed retort. Instead, he spluttered, shooting off the couch to grab her elbow.

“I didn’t mean tonight! There’s a new episode of our show on. And... And—”

“And what?” She asked, a sly smile narrowing on him.

“I dunno. I thought we could fool around a bit. My roommate’s out for the night. We can fuck on the couch.”

“Hm, I’m not convinced. See, my boyfriend just told me I need to stop hanging out with trash and get my work done. And he’s pretty smart, even though he dropped out of high school. So, I should probably listen to him,” she teased.

Faust pulled her away from the door, pasting her to his side as he walked her back to the couch.

“Rule number one... Never take my advice.”

[imtaelented]

— THE FALLEN ELF

#7: “no, don’t take it off. Keep it on” #27: “why are you staring at me like that?” #48: “god, you’re so hot when you’re mad” __ PAIRING: elf!roseanne x human!reader

GENRE: fantasy au / elf au

WARNINGS: gets a lil spicy, but nothing too crazy!

A/N: bless your heart

WORDCOUNT: 965

SUMMARY: a human comes across a fallen elf that isn’t as innocent as she seems to be.

MASTERLIST  || DRABBLE PROMPTS

__

“We need firewood or else this isn’t going to be a very fun winter for us” Allen insisted, pushing you out the door as you gather your materials.

He was right. It had been a harsh winter in Hyvenmel, and it was only going to get worse.  Without the proper warmth and protection, one wouldn’t be able to make it through such a strident wintertide. 

“I know, I know, you say the same thing every year” you mock, throwing your thick wool cloak around your shoulders. “I’ll make sure to get enough wood to last us the full three months of winter”

And with that, you clutch the fridged metal handle of the old rusted wagon you’d lugged around every year during this time. It’s decaying, ancient wheels make an appalling screeching sound with every dreadful step that you take. 

You’d been only walking for an hour or so, collecting firewood as you progress deeper into the frosty forest. When you saw a strange object poking out from under a fallen tree. As you got closer and bent down to pick it up, you realize it was fabric buried under the plush white snow. 

The fabric was silky and slipped through each of your fingers as you fondled with it. You followed the intricate patterns sewn down the textile to yet another unusual component. You lift the fabric a little to find a hand, hidden beneath the bark of the fallen tree. 

Panicked, you shuffle through the snow. Using your mitten covered hands to uncover what had appeared to be the frozen body of a beautiful elf. Her skin, a light pale blue with a tint of red on her rosy cheeks. Her body, covered only with the light silky fabric that you had discovered earlier. Her eyes, frozen shut with small flakes of snow coating her long brown lashes. 

“A woodland elf” you whispered to yourself as you pulled the girl up from the snow. 

You pulled your cloak off of your own body and wrapped it around her thin frame. Making sure to keep the cold out. You got up from the numbing snow and decided that building a fire would help the poor elf wake up. Woodland elves aren’t made for the cold. So in harsh winters like this, they must stay inside or they’ll freeze to death. Luckily you came across this elf before it’s own body started to shut down. 

As you tend to the fire, the faint sound of snow shuffling sounded behind you. As you look over your shoulder you see the pale elf shivering while whipping a few tears from her eyes. Finally, you catch a glimpse of her wide faded copper eyes. The colour in them almost completely drained from the cold air. 

“Hey, are you okay?”. You asked. Pulling the cloak up around her neck a little more. 

She looked up at you as she adjusted herself on the pile of blankets you had laid her down on. Not saying a single word. 

You scan her frail body up and down and notice a few scapes and cuts along the sides of her arms, legs and chest. She must have gotten injured from laying underneath the tree that was on top of her. 

“You’re injured, don’t worry I’ve brought a few supplies with me to fix that”. You motioned as you pointed at her wounds.

As you pulled the first aid box out of the rusty wagon, the quiet elf began to remove her clothes as you rummaged through the metal tin. By the time you were done finding the contents that you needed, the elf had already taken off most of her clothes. Sitting in the snow, half nude only wearing a lacy white brassiere and her long flowy skirt.

You were quite shocked when you looked up at her, now nealing in front of you. Her hands fumbling with the buttons on the waist of her silk skirt. 

“No, don’t take it off! Keep it on!” you spluttered, clasping both of your hands atop of hers. 

A tint of red now showing on your face as you try your best to hide your embarrassment. Apparently, the elf thought your bashfulness was quite amusing. She kept a slight smirk on her face as she watched you apply her bandages. 

Her badgering expression started to piss you off the more she stared at you. You finished up with her bandages and handed her shirt to her. Catching another glimpse of her teasing stare. With every move you made, she never took her eyes off of you. 

“Why are you staring at me like that?” you snapped, gathering the contents that you had taken out and put them back into the wagon. 

Sitting your self by the fire, you decided that you’d had enough with the naughty elf and just wanted to go back home. Allen was probably worried about you anyways. You’d been out for three hours now and it usually only took you two to collect the firewood and head back home. 

The sound of the elf situating herself across from you broke you out of your thoughts. The red glow of the fire creating a pulsating light across her face. A smirk finding it’s way on her lips as you admired her ethereal features. Tilting her head, her eyes moved their way up and down your body. 

“Okay, you know what? That’s it! If you’re gonna keep staring at me like that, then I’m gonna leave you out here to freeze to death as I found you before” you threatened. Turning your body away from the provoking figure. 

“God, you’re hot when you’re mad” The elf finally purred. The smirk that had once been on her face, now a smile showing her pearly white teeth.

[athingthatwantsvirginia]

Everything Joan Didion Promised

PART TWENTY-TWO OF THE DO YOU SEE HER FACE? SERIES

Pairing: Jess Mariano x Original Character (Ella Stevens)

Warnings: a lil angsty, plentiful pop culture references, mentions of divorce/family issues

Word Count: 5.1K

Summary: When Jess returns to Stars Hollow to retrieve his car, Ella tries to keep him from getting hypothermia. Later, they cross paths at the annual firelight festival.

Refilling the shakers, Ella nodded at Sheriff Cooper as he waltzed into the diner. The local law enforcement came in at all hours of the day for coffee and free donuts, though it wasn’t like they had boatloads to do in a town as sleepy as Stars Hollow. She didn’t bother to eavesdrop on the conversation until she was behind the counter again, putting the salt and pepper back where it belonged. Coop was sliding a slip of paper across to Luke, who stood by the register. Glancing over, she recognized the handwriting immediately. After all, it was all over her books.

“Is that Jess’s registration?” she asked, leaning in near Luke.

Luke sighed, casting a wary glance in her direction. “Yes.”

“They found his car? Jeez, it took them long enough,” she said off-handedly, tucking her hair behind her ears.

“Hey! It only took us a day, young lady,” Coop chimed in, face sullen below the bill of his leather hat. “Not too hard with a hunk of junk like that.”

Brows furrowed, Ella turned back to Luke and tilted her head at him in askance.

Groaning and rolling his eyes, Luke looked over at her again. “It was in my dad’s old garage. I went to check on it this morning and the lock was busted off.”

“You stole his car?” Ella crossed her arms over her chest, taking a step back and straightening up. When Luke didn’t respond, Ella scoffed and shook her head to herself.

“Look, Ella, if he didn’t have a car, maybe he wouldn’t keep going to Walmart,” Luke explained, his voice a grumble under his breath.

“Hm,” Ella hummed, nodding doubtfully.

He was about to continue when strong yellow lights began flashing through the window to the right. A sheriff’s car preceded a tow truck with Jess’s rusty Ambassador hooked onto the back. Coop said the car had broken down on the Expressway a couple hours earlier, and Jess had immediately been picked up. Luke instructed Ella to hold down the fort while he went out to deal with the situation, the precession parking right out in front of the diner.

And as she began closing up, cashing out the final customers and wiping down the counters, she couldn’t keep her distracted gaze off of the scene through the window. She couldn’t hear what Jess and Luke were shouting at each other, but she could gather it wasn’t a pleasant conversation. A knot of nerves sat in her stomach, watching from the corner of her eye. Luke eventually stomped back into the diner, and Ella saw Jess collapse into the back seat of his rust bucket across the street. She tried to ask Luke what had happened, but he shut her down instantly. The rest of the shift was spent in tense, anxious silence.

.   .   .

A bright half moon shone in the late February sky as Ella left the dark diner and locked up. She could see her breath in whitish clouds as she stalled in her path at the bottom of the concrete steps. Flexing her hands in the pockets of her peacoat, she bit the inside of her cheek and furrowed her brows. Either she could leave Jess where he was, curled up in the backseat of his death trap on wheels, and turn down the street to the little blue house, or go up and to him and face the music. Turning on the heel of her boot, she almost ignored him. Almost. Though she spoke to him every now and again over the phone, seeing him in person was a whole different matter. Just the sight of him made her heart twist in her chest. But then a huge gust of wind came, blowing her hair back and making frosty roses form on her freckled cheeks. Emitting an audible growl in the empty street, she shook her head to herself and marched to the car which held so many memories.

She knocked twice, hard, on the back window with frozen knuckles.

Jess’s figure shifted only slightly in the seat. “Go away,” he groaned.

Ella rolled her eyes. “It’s me, jackass!”

Huffing out a frustrated breath, Jess finally sat up and cranked down his window. “What?”

“I almost forgot how much more charming you are in-person,” she quipped.

“G’night,” Jess shot back ruefully, making to roll his window back up.

Ella put her hand on the glass to stop him, sighing out another cloud of condensation. “Look, Luke is back with Nicole again-”

Jess scoffed.

“Yeah, I don’t know, either,” she muttered. “But he’s spending the night at their place in Litchfield, so I doubt you’ll be able to get up to the apartment without breaking in, and that’ll likely cause more problems than it solves-”

“Like I need Luke’s help,” he interjected petulantly.

“Just let me finish,” she snapped. “It’s gonna drop to like eight degrees out here, and neither of us wants you getting hypothermia, so just come stay with me for the night.”

Brows furrowing, Jess couldn’t hide the utter surprise which appeared on his face. The ice between them was slowly melting, sure, but he never figured she would be forgiving enough to offer something like that. “Very funny, Stevens. I’m tired, alright?”

“Jesus, Jess, I’m not joking!”

“What about your dad?” Jess asked, his voice flat, though his eyes were calculating.

She only shrugged. “Well, from what I remember, you have a talent for sneaking around my house. Your skills might be a little rusty, but I’m not gonna sweat it.”

Slowly, very slowly, Jess nodded and got out of the backseat, sheepish. His joints cracked as he straightened up again, stiff from two hours lying motionless in the cold. Appraising him, Ella couldn’t help but grimace. He had dark circles under his eyes, skin paler than usual. And the black beanie he wore certainly didn’t suit him.

“The prodigal son, indeed,” she said, eyebrows raised.

His mouth was set in a thin line, unamused. “Are we going, or not?”

.   .   .

Humming. Jess had almost forgotten about the humming. Most of the time, Ella didn’t even realize she was doing it. At the diner, over homework. Anytime she wasn’t acutely focused on something, her mind wandered back to whatever music was striking her fancy at the moment. Standing awkwardly, with his hands in the pockets of his jeans, Jess had yet to even unzip the leather jacket he was wearing or shed any layers. He’d never felt so uncomfortable in her room before, not even the first time he’d come, before they were dating, when he’d discovered how good she was at cards. He watched her rifling through the drawers of her old dresser, humming some Elliot Smith song he couldn’t quite place the title of.

She turned back to him with clothes in her hands, tossing them onto the mattress by which Jess stood before she started making for the door. “You get to wear the famous KISS t-shirt tonight, my friend.”

“C’mon, Elle-” he began, his voice a sigh.

“You should be honored, Jess. Besides, it’s the biggest t-shirt I have. And those sweatpants were Noah’s. Should fit you. I’m gonna go brush my teeth and change and stuff. Make yourself at home,” she said casually, as though there weren’t so many unspoken words hanging in the air between them.

He shook his head, looking down at his beat-up shoes. “You don’t have to do this.”

“Believe me, I’ll sleep better knowing you’re not freezing to death in your back seat,” she replied.

Turning and shutting the door softly behind her, Ella left before Jess could say anything else. Looking around, things were much the same, save for the walls. He remembered painting the white color on them, right before everything had gone to hell. He remembered waking up in the room so many times, rushing out before Luke would notice he was gone, planting a final kiss on her sleepy face before he went. He’d always woken up before her. Nervous that she may come back before he was finished, Jess stripped off his dirty clothes as quickly as he could, leaving them in a small pile near the window through which he had just climbed. He pulled on the sweatpants and hesitated a moment before tugging the shirt over his head. He’d seen her wearing it in the early light of the morning, or late at night when they sat up together, him reading and her drawing.

The corkboard over her desk was covered in new sketches, and he saw some in charcoal. He turned away, eyes meeting the purple mural behind the mattress. The sight of it made him smile. She was even more talented than when he had left, if it was possible. A soft creak sounded in the room, and he turned expecting to find Ella. Instead, a large, black cat with one eye missing and a curmudgeonly expression on its face came in, hopping up onto the bare surface of the desk and curling up into a ball. Quirking a brow, Jess stared at the cat, who Ella had told him was named Fleetwood. Shocking.

Ella snorted a laugh when she came back in, now dressed in a flannel shirt and some leggings, makeup washed off and hair loose down her back. “Hm. You’ve finally met the ghost which haunts the Stevens house. He got pissed because I opened the dryer.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah, he’s great.”

“Sounds like it.”

Blowing out a long breath, she switched off her overhead light and approached the bed. The clock read almost midnight, and her eyes were achy with fatigue. Collapsing onto the mattress and burrowing under her blankets, she went to turn out the bedside lamp but hesitated when she saw Jess still standing rigidly at the end of the bed, debating whether to sleep on her old carpet.

“Jess, you can lay down if you want. Not like we haven’t slept in the same bed before,” she said, voice calm though her heart was beating against her ribs. “I mean, if you wanna sleep in the same bed...Woah, that was presumptuous of me. I’m sorry, I-”

Jess cut her off with a chuckle. “It’s fine, Stevens. I just...wanted to make sure.”

Nodding, she shut the lamp off and felt the mattress dip next to her as Jess got under the covers and laid on his side, facing the wall. She didn’t know how long they spent, backs to each other, in stale silence. It was strange, how similar it felt to so many other nights together. But so utterly different, too. His hair was longer, with less gel than ever. She wondered how else California had changed him, in ways she couldn’t see. Taking in a long breath, Ella squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before turning over to face his back and hoping she didn’t regret speaking.

“Jess?”

“Yeah?”

“How’d you know about your car? I mean...I didn’t even know about that. And Luke rants to me pretty much every day.”

There was another long silence before Jess heaved a huge sigh. Ella could see the outline of his shoulders move beneath the white fabric of the worn shirt in the dim light. As he flipped over on his side, they looked each other in the eyes for the first time in what felt like years.

“My mom told me about it.”

“Your mom?” Ella’s brow crinkled.

Jess breathed another sigh. “Yeah, I’ve been keepin’ in touch with her since I got back to New York. She came to see Luke at the diner this morning. Weren’t you there?”

“I don’t live there. I was in class.”

He scoffed. “Geek.”

“Whatever, jackass. You and your back pocket books,” she said, rolling her eyes. “So...you and your mom are…?”

“Well, we’re not gonna be doing any mother-son talent shows together any time soon, but at least she told me where my property was.”

Nodding, she hummed quietly in acknowledgement. “I really didn’t know he had the car, Jess. I would’ve said something.”

“I know.”

“Good.”

Then, after a moment: “I don’t know. She and I...at least I don’t have to live with her and her endless string of suitors. She’s got a new one, y’know.”

“Hm.”

“Yeah, I don’t even remember what his name is. She might’ve told me, but, at this point, it’s a waste of time thinking they’ll stick around longer than a week,” Jess said. He chewed on his bottom lip.

“What about your dad?” she asked quietly, noticing how his gaze darted away from hers at the question. There was still some distance between them, but she could almost feel his breath on her face.

Jess took a moment before answering. “Well, he’s still out there in California and I’m here. That’s that.”

“Okay,” she said shortly, nodding again in understanding. Her eyes searched his face for anything more, but his expression was unreadable. “Did you like it out there, at least? Was it everything Joan Didion promised?”

He shifted slightly, hand going under the pillow on which his head rested, getting more comfortable. A hint of a smirk touched his lips. “Sort of. But, I do know one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“You’d hate it there,” he told her, a smug expression growing.

She chuckled breathily. “Why?”

“It’s hot as hell, first off. There’s sand everywhere. And I know how you feel about oceans,” he said, shooting a pointed glance her way. “And it’s just full of these hippies, babbling about astrology and fate and all that bullshit. I don’t think you’d be able to stomach it for a day.”

“Oh, and you were able to weather it so much better?” she teased.

He shrugged. “Well, I worked at the bookstore on the boardwalk for a few months. Only a few crazies to deal with every shift.”

“Hm. I could see it. You sulking behind the counter, reading, while some flower child begs you for some help.”

“Hey, I did a great job,” he argued.

“Yeah, using those famous Jess Mariano customer service skills,” she said doubtfully, then stifled a yawn against the back of her hand.

“Tired?” he asked, raising a brow.

“Not really,” she lied. “I just had an eight o’clock this morning. Should be against the law.”

“Ah, yes. The joys of higher education,” Jess said with a quiet laugh, watching as she struggled to keep her eyes open.

She snickered, her speech growing more raspy with fatigue by the word. “It’s okay. Kind of interesting. Pretty boring here without Rory, though.”

“She’s at Yale, right?”

Ella nodded. “Living her dreams. Winning everyone over with those baby blues...Sorry. I sound fucking pathetic.”

Biting down on his lip again, Jess looked at her for a long moment. He didn’t realize how much he had missed her until he got a glimpse of her. He got her voice every once in a while, but not her face. Not her mind.

A blush spread over her cheeks at his gaze, and she suddenly regretted her words. She wanted to roll her eyes at herself. It was so childish to be jealous of Rory, but sometimes she couldn’t help it. And when Jess was around, she always found herself forgetting to keep it all locked up, letting things slip out. It certainly didn’t help that she was totally exhausted.

“Eleanor,” Jess said earnestly. “You’re not pathetic, alright? You’re a badass artist. Lily Briscoe. And, for the record, you’ve got Bette Davis eyes.”

“Bette Davis’s eyes were blue, Jess,” she said doubtfully.

“I don’t mean the color. Just the look,” he said, shrugging at her correction.

Ella snorted a suspicious laugh. “How the hell do you know that song anyway?”

“Not important. And you’re not gonna distract me. Don’t doubt yourself, Stevens,” Jess said, and for a minute Ella found herself enclosed in a memory. In a New York port authority, preparing to board a bus, Jess with a new drawing of the Hudson in his pocket. “Own your narrative.”

She swallowed down the pleasant swell of her heart. “Well, if I’m owning mine, you’ve gotta own yours. Have you started that book yet, Kerouac?”

He gave a thin, mocking smile. “The travelling kinda got in the way.”

“Well, I’m sure it gave you lots of material,” she murmured, eyes finally fluttering shut.

It only took a few minutes for her breathing to even out, slow and steady. Jess turned over onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, the water spot Ella always said was shaped like a Zeppelin. Raking a hand through his hair anxiously, he shut his eyes and tried to fall asleep. But the lavender smell was too familiar, almost too comforting, as was the woman next to him.

.   .   .

Standing by the register, Ella tried to bite back a smirk as Luke argued with his sister. Liz was rounding up ingredients from down in the diner to bring upstairs. Her new boyfriend, TJ, he was called, was up in the apartment attempting some sort of lunch. Ella would have called the cops on him trying to get up in the apartment had Liz not been there to identify him. She had heard stories about Liz over the years, from both Luke and Jess. And though she had gleaned enough information to assume the woman was bizarre, she hadn’t expected the new age, peace-loving, crystal earring-making vibe she had. Especially considering some of the things Ella knew she had done to Jess, not the least of which was shipping him off because her boyfriend got into a fist fight with him. And TJ? Ella could only imagine the angry shade of red Luke’s face would turn when TJ asked him to guess what his initials stood for.

Checking her watch, she sighed softly when she saw it was only two in the afternoon. There was a lull after the lunch rush, and she’d cleaned up as well as she could for the time being. So, she would be left stagnant behind the counter while Stars Hollow lives rushed around her. And, though Caesar was in the back, he rarely came out to speak with her. He was busy with prep, and the new headphones he’d just gotten, to listen to his music on full volume during slow times.

A scowling Luke turned back to Ella as Liz marched up the stairs, arms full of food, and broke her out of her pitiful reverie. Her eyes widened slightly at his furious look.

“You let him up there?” Luke demanded.

“She’s your sister! What was I supposed to do? Get Coop out here to arrest her fiancé?” she asked, gesturing with her hands in exasperation.

“I don’t know! Just...you could’ve waited until I got back!”

Ella shook her head. “How was I supposed to know when you’d be back? You didn’t say anything! Y’know, if you’d just get a cell phone for these kinds of things like I’ve been telling you-”

“You don’t have a cellphone!”

“I don’t own a diner.”

Luke put his hand up and let out a weary sigh. “Enough. Fine. Just...is there any chance you could stage a horrible accident in the next two minutes? We’d have to take a long drive to the hospital.”

“I don’t think that would solve the core problem, boss,” she said.

Nodding, Luke went to ascend the stairs to a certain doom. “You’re right, kid. You’re right,” he admitted gruffly. “You okay down here for a while? Sure you don’t need any help?”

She smirked. “Think I can manage for the time being.”

He shot her a final glance, narrowing his eyes. “This would all be so much easier if you were a bad employee.”

“Can’t always get what you want,” she quipped, then turned as a customer approached. “If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t take the earrings she tried to bribe me with.”

“That doesn’t make me feel better in the slightest.”

Scoffing, she shook her head again as Luke disappeared behind the curtain. A smile formed on her face as she rang up the tourist family, and she even shot them a wave as they made their way out the door. Her breath caught in her throat, however, when she saw Jess’s head nearing the diner entrance through the front window. Immediately, she clutched at her necklace and bit the inside of her cheek. She’d awoken in the morning to find Jess gone, borrowed clothes folded and left on her desk. She’d taken pity on him. Swept up in the moment, in seeing him again, in seeing him shivering in the backseat of his car. But his side of the bed empty, without a word, brought a bad taste to her mouth. It was becoming familiar. She didn’t want it to become familiar. She didn’t want to admit how much his leaving had affected her, and maybe she didn’t truly feel it until she saw his face again. For just a moment, it felt easy and right. Like it had. Like home. But the morning was cruel and brought reality. She’d seen him pushing his car through town in the direction of Gypsy’s while she was on her way to work. His car would be fixed and he would be gone again. And she would be left behind.

Hoping to look busy, she took her notepad out of her apron, doodling mindlessly. The bell over the door jingled, and her heart sped up. Chewing on the eraser of her pencil, she made a pointed effort not to notice him right away.

Jess came up in front of her and tapped slightly on the counter. “Hey, Stevens.”

“Hi,” she replied, eyebrows raised. “You get your car to Gypsy’s? I saw the little parade this morning.”

Jess nodded and sighed softly. “Yeah. Not gonna be fixed until tonight.”

“Tragic,” she quipped flatly. “Are you gonna to go to the firelight festival to pass time, Mr. Model Citizen?”

“Is that what’s going on out there?” he asked with a frown, groaning dramatically.

“Same time every year, Mariano.”

“Just another Hallmark holiday,” he said.

Ella turned away, masking the twist of memory in her heart, to make a fresh pot of coffee. “Do you need something?”

Clearing his throat, Jess looked away from her and over to the checkered curtain. “Is Luke upstairs? I left a notebook I need up there.”

“A notebook?” she asked quizzically.

Jess ran a hand over his mouth. “Just got some things in it that I need.”

“Specific.”

“Aren’t I?”

She scoffed, then faced him again. “Well, Luke’s up there. Along with your mom and Prince Charming.”

“Fuck. You met him?”

“Oh, yes.”

“And?” he asked expectantly.

She snorted a laugh. “I really think you have to see it to believe it.”

Blowing out a long, tired breath, Jess walked towards the stairs. He stopped short when he made it to the curtain, tilting his head back to her with a questioning look. Messy hair, hands on her hips, pencil behind her ear. A vision from his past, making his stomach fill with butterflies every time he saw her. But her hazel gaze didn’t quite meet his own, off somewhere he couldn’t reach. Biting down on his lip hard, he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Are you okay, Eleanor?”

Nodding, she attempted a weak smile his way. “Always, Jess. Are you okay?”

“Yeah...yeah. I’m okay. Thank you...for last night.”

“You’re welcome.”

And then she heard his footfalls trudging up the creaky wooden stairs. Fiddling with her necklace, she swallowed down her thoughts and plastered on another grin as Lane bounced in, announcing she’d found the perfect house to rent with her band.

.   .   .

Other than old books and lavender, bonfire was one of Ella’s favorite smells. She had her ratty black peacoat draped around her small frame. Rory and Lane had convinced her to go to the festival, both of them with the night free. And she figured maybe some time away from her bedroom and the diner would clear her mind. Spaces which were so crowded with her memories. She would just have to wait until Jess was gone, and she would be connected with him only through the phone line again. She wouldn’t have to feel the way her heartbeat picked up every time she got near him, touched him. And the worst part was, the feeling wasn’t bad. She remembered it. She missed it. How relaxed he made her feel.

But, as soon as she’d spotted her father and Fiona walking hand-in-hand through the square, she’d retreated to the bench near the bookstore to draw. Rory and Lane tried to get her to join them for candied apples and popcorn, but she wasn’t hungry. And, besides, there were plans to meet up at the Gilmore house later for some movies anyway. She just needed a moment of quiet, to herself. Without being pulled in so many directions. Though her hands were shaking from the cold, she managed a sketch of Jess’s car, two ghosts in the front seat, all tires flat.

She saw his jacket before she saw his face, spotting the familiar black leather out of the corner of her eye as he sat down next to her. Neither of them said a word for a moment, the continuous buzz of town activity and the crackling of the bonfire filling their ears.

“I like it,” Jess said, looking over her shoulder at the drawing.

Ella blew a breath out her nose and stopped shading. Leaning back against the bench, she shot him a momentary glance before shifting her eyes out to town square. “You always say that.”

“And it’s always true.”

“Yeah, whatever,” she scoffed, shaking her head a little.

“I’m serious. Who wouldn’t love a drawing of their car which could inspire nightmares?” he asked, a smirk on his face.

Pursing her lips, Ella tore the page out of her sketchbook. She signed and dated it in the bottom corner and handed it over to him. “It’ll bring you more joy than it brings me, then.”

Taking the drawing, his teasing expression faded as he noticed the wistful quality to her eyes. The one he had seen earlier. “Thanks,” he muttered quietly.

“Though you weren’t coming to this?” she said, gesturing to the roaring fire in the middle of town.

“Me neither. Gypsy said she still needs about a half hour.” He glanced down at his watch for what felt like the millionth time in a day, then shoved his hands in his pockets.

“So, you’re actually gonna say goodbye this time?” she asked, finally looking over at him with earnest, eyebrows raised.

His gaze dropped to his shoes and he struggled for a moment to find words. But her eyes, looking at him in the light of the fire. They made him feel ways he couldn’t even articulate. “Look, Elle, I’m sorry. Luke freaked out on me when I told him about graduation-”

“Oh, yeah, and speaking of Luke,” she interrupted. “Did you get into a fight with him or something earlier? You stormed out and then he left like twenty minutes later. He was totally wasted. We had to close early for the festival and he still wasn’t back.”

Jess ran a hand over his mouth. “He was trying to make me say something to Liz about TJ. Get her to come to her senses. I tried to tell him it was useless, but he just wouldn’t hear me.”

She hummed in acknowledgement. “And you met TJ?”

“Unfortunately.”

“You think he’ll turn out like the others?” she asked, but there was less fire in her tone. There were so many words on the tip of her tongue, but she was tired. And her heart dropped into her stomach when she even thought of saying them.

Jess chuckled bitterly. “I know he will. He’ll take all her money, or drink all her booze, or...worse. And then it’ll be mine and Luke’s job to fix it. But, hey, where would we be without family?”

Ella smirked humorlessly at the thick sarcasm which laced his tone. “Yeah. Where?” Then, after a moment: “I think my dad and Fiona are gonna get a divorce.”

“Really?” he asked, but didn’t look surprised.

Though it wasn’t as if she felt shocked, either. “The whole new baby thing isn’t working out. I don’t know. I don’t think my dad cares either way, but that only makes her more angry. They scream and throw things at each other. The way he and my mom used to fight. And then Fiona apologizes and she tries to make him happy again. But it never makes any difference. He hasn’t been happy in years. Maybe never. But it’s not her fault. And I feel bad for her. But, right now, it just is.”

Jess nodded, listening. He noticed how she ran the key across the chain of her necklace, and a pang of nostalgia hit him.

“At least Adam likes high school. He’s already making waves in the science club, from what he tells me. Figures. And at least he gets along with my dad and Fiona way better than I ever have,” she said, shrugging her shoulders dismissively.

“At least,” Jess murmured sadly.

Ella managed a thin smile. “Makes sense. He doesn’t look exactly like her.”

Before Jess knew what he was doing, he took her free hand from where it clutched the metal of the bench and gave it a squeeze. For a moment, her cold hand was rigid and unmoving in his grasp. But, clearing her throat and looking down in surprise between them, she finally reciprocated. Gave his hand a squeeze back. Then, she flashed him another tiny smile, and disentangled her fingers. The moment had gone, and Ella hoped the chilly air would be able to cool the flush which rose on her cheeks at his touch. An awkward tension passed between the two of them, both at a loss for words. The town troubadour, strumming his old guitar near the entrance to the high school, suddenly caught Jess’s searching eye.

“This whole thing is meaningless and expensive,” he began, looking out over the many blue concession tents and the people with solo cups full of Founder’s Day punch, which tasted as close to gasoline as punch could. “But the music’s not completely terrible.”

Scoffing, Ella shook her head. “Too happy.”

A fond smile crossed over Jess’s face, the most genuine one she’d seen from him in quite a while. “Anyone ever tell you how unpredictable you are?”

“Shut up,” she replied, cracking a smile of her own.

[scottybrock]

Arzaylea Who? - Colby Brock

A/N: Requested by a beautiful anon: “If you feel comfortable would you be able to write something about this whole situation colbys going through, but he actually has a gf already but no one knows about her and maybe the whole thing is just colby curving arzaelya (i don’t know her name tbh) and not wanting to talk to her because he loves his gf (you obvs dont have to write it, but I just thought it would be cool)”

Colby usually had quite a good judge of character, but he really missed the mark on this one. This one being none other than Arzaylea. You had heard some things about Arzaylea. Things that were pretty bad- like she’d supposedly gotten the lead singer of the band 5 Seconds of Summer hooked on cocaine. That she’d cheated on every single partner she had. That she tried to profit off of Lil Peep’s death, and how truly manipulative she really was. Her beef with Bella Thorne. The evidence was there, and it was impossible to ignore.

You respected your boyfriend’s decisions normally, respected that he was his own person. After all, he was a twenty-two year old man, who didn’t need anyone to handle him with kid gloves. But this? This wasn’t good. Colby had a heart of gold. His generosity and his kindness knew no bounds, and that’s what made you the most nervous.

You knew that this Arzaylea chick, when she got too comfortable, would try to drain Colby dry. Half of his fanbase had already tried to warn him, but Colby was the type of person to give someone the benefit of the doubt. You, however, were not. Things just seemed too fishy; she seemed almost too nice. She also seemed just about ready to ride Colby’s dick for another five minutes of fame, but that could’ve just been your inner green monster talking.

However, you knew that it was something that Colby would have to experience himself. He wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, wanting to believe that people could change for the better. You had a sick feeling in the pit of your stomach, that she was going to dry and suck Colby dry. You appreciated the fans trying to warn Colby, and you knew that he did as well. What neither of you appreciated, was the fans calling him stupid, or a dumb ass. He was neither of those. He was the kindest, most generous person you’d ever met. He wasn’t stupid. He saw everything, but he wanted to hope for the best, for everyone.

It infuriated you, that the fans were calling Colby names in earnest. You shook your head when you thought about it. If Colby was their “fave,” then why would the Twitter stans want to hurt him? Why would they want him to feel like less than what he actually was? Colby was one of the best people you’d ever met, and it broke your heart to see him treated like he wasn’t a human being.

The two of them were standing in one corner of the kitchen. Colby kept glancing at you, offering soft smiles and subtle winks. You grinned back at him, tossing him an overdramatic wink, making him snicker quietly. The thing was, you weren’t intimidated by the clout-chaser standing in front of your boyfriend. You knew that if Colby wanted someone else, he wouldn’t be with you. The thing that bothered you was that it was obvious that she was just going to use him, just like she did with her previous partners. 

Katrina and Tara glanced over at you, rolling their eyes at Arzaylea’s theatrics, the way she seemed to be permanently glued to Colby’s side. You, Devyn, Kat, and Tara had met up for dinner the night before, and the topic of what Arzaylea did, allegedly. The four of you agreed that none of you were her biggest fan. Katrina had informed you that Sam wasn’t a fan of Arzaylea, either. He could see that she was using Colby, just like she did to her previous partners. 

Unfortunately for her, you were Colby’s girlfriend. He loved you, wanted you, and no one else. The fans had no idea that you were dating Colby, but you had been with him for almost two years. Colby wanted to keep the relationship a secret, because he was terrified about what his fans would do. He knew that you would get waves and waves of hate, from some of his more, uh, self-proclaimed future girlfriends of his. You agreed to keep the relationship a secret. You were ready when he was, content to go with the flow.

The two of you weren’t into PDA. Subtle touches and sweet smiles from across the room was enough for you. You didn’t want to be one of those couples who was all over each other, even in front of your friends. Much to your amusement, some of your friends had no idea that you and Colby were dating. 

You wandered over to the two of them, offering Arzaylea a frosty smile. She smiled back at you just as frostily. Well, at least you think she did. Her face contorted into a weird grimace. It looked like she was holding in a fart.

 Colby’s expression brightened just at the sight of you. He stepped away from Arzaylea, holding his arms out for you. You stepped into his embrace, resting your head against his chest. His arms wrapped around your waist, and he rested his chin on the top of your head, his lips brushing against you softly. “Hey, baby,” Colby murmured, his voice soft and sweet. You nuzzled your face affectionately into the soft material of his hoodie. “Hey,” You replied, your voice muffled from where your face was nuzzled against him. 

Colby gave your waist a gentle squeeze, then dropped his arms from around you. “I’m gonna go get another drink,” He told you. You nodded in response, then stood up on your tiptoes to press your lips to his jaw. Colby’s cheeks flushed, and he smiled at you happily. His eyes never left your face as he walked away, nearly running into the fridge, much to your amusement. You watched as he walked away, a soft smile on your face as you ignored the sound of the clout-gobblin clearing her throat in front of you.

“You’re a lucky girl,” Arzaylea smirked at you, her eyes twinkling with ill-intent. Your expression turned into one of smugness, and you raised an eyebrow at her. “I sure am,” You replied. Arzaylea scowled briefly at your confidence, but then rearranged her features back into the fart-smile. “It’d be a shame if someone were to change that.” It was her turn to look at you, her expression smug. She lifted her cup to her mouth, trying to hide the smug smile on her lips

You simply smacked the cup out of her hands, smirking as the red liquid sloshed all over her over-priced white shirt. Arzaylea’s eyes widened in horror as the sticky red liquid spread across the front of her shirt. You swore you heard the sound of faint laughter behind you. You leaned in closer, ignoring the daggers she was glaring at you, as she tried to dab at the red stains on her stupidly priced white shirt. Your smirk widened. “Stay in your damn lane, honey.”

[merthurians-prat-and-idiot]

Double The Pay~ Lee Scoresby & OC fanfic

Note: Hi!! This is a lil something I got inspired to write one Sunday night after watching HDM & reading Lee x Reader stuff! I have included an OC Female character called Indra. Pls let me know what you think- Its a draft but I think it turned out ok! A bit cliche but hey!

Enjoy :)

•°○•○•○•••

All Farder Coram had said was "Double the pay?" laughter in his voice as he shook his head at the young girl who had tricked them all.

See Lyra was a smart young girl, that had to be said before anyone moved onwards- she knew how to get people to help her, how to weigh & bargain with her words alone.

She had certainly done so with the two new recruits to the Gyptian crews.

Lee Scoresby, Aeronaut, Adventurer & all around troublemaker with lovely hare Hester his dæmon had recently found his path crossed with Lyra, all because of a certain re-armoured bear, who now claimed the space next to him huffing with impatience.

Indra Collen, Explorer, Fighter & Fellow troublemaker with her raccoon dæmon Lowell. She too had been part of the troupes trying to convince Lorek to get back into the world. She had seen the spark Lyra brought, never going out despite the cold icy winds the north blew constantly.

Indra knew of the Gyptians, her grandmother a Gyptian woman herself- forced to give her daughter to her father- a passing magisterium general- but that was a whole other story.

What matters here is the fact that these two had been fangled in their own way into joining this new adventure & what a one it was going to be!

°°°°••••○○○○●●●●••••°°°°○○○○●●●●°°°°•

Another thing one must know in order for this tale to have its birth is of Lee & Indra.

Lee and Indra were practically as good as inseparable. Partners in life as they were in trouble.

The two had met bordering on five years ago in far far lands from the North. They had met of course in a huge ruckus.

Lee had found the wrong inn, wrong words, wrong sleight of hand and found himself smashed against a reception desk of said inn- getting his ass handed to him.

"Well fuck"

"Lee you really are an idiot"

"Thank you Hester- I appreciate that right now"

The person doing the dusting with the Aeronaunt's body snarled chucking him into the window, glass smashing outwards as his body met the frosty road, splinters & rocks marring his face.

"Is this my lowest moment?" Lee contemplated for a second spitting gravel from his teeth into the dirt.

"Nah probably not" he winced, sitting up and huffing as a hunking man, bones groaning under his size quick-waddled towards the exhausted adventurer.

"Here we go" Hester sighed- not even surprised anymore.

"Nothing a nip of brandy won't shake" he winked to his dæmon.

"Now I don't know about that- might need a bit of whiskey too" A voice cut through Hester's abated response.

Lee looked up squinting at the strong sun behind the speaker until it settled into focus.

A woman with bright golden eyes alight with a spark of amusement and curiosity- he could feel the insant tangible fire & excitement seeping from her very essence like no-one before. She stood with a raccoon at her side- both surveying the situation with a clear lack of judgment or surprise- he distantly wondered how many times she had been in his postion right at that second.

"Now now lady- this is between me and the piece of shit on the ground here" the meat-head spoke- barely regarding the mystery woman despite the hastily spotted dagger hanging from her belt that Lee spotted the next second.

He watched her smile before aiming a very swift & sharp punch to the side of the man's head, knocking him down cold like timber at a woodman's forest.

"Well shit!" Lee exclaimed unprompted.

"Shit indeed Mr-?"

"Scoresby- but you can call me Lee seeing as though you just saved my ass"

"Ok Lee- I'm Indra Collen & this here is Lowell" she smiled- grasping his arm and pulling him to his feet.

"Pleasure" he replied tipping his hat.

"How about you repay me by telling me how the hell this all happened?" She twinkled.

He grinned. This was gonna be good.

°°°°•○•○○●●○○°°○°○•●•●•●•°°○•○●●●○°

From that day forward they'd stayed in each others lives. Ever the exception to their nomadic rules. Turning from grateful strangers to fanciful friends to much much more- proclaimed lovers- bound to travel & adventure together for as long as life allowed them.

So it was inexplicable that they came as a pair really, with Hester & Lowell too of course.

And so the two found themselves at the beginning of a new chapter for them & and invited into a new ongoing story book to dance amongst the pages & fly alongside the plot.

°•••○●°•●○○●○•°●•°○●○•°°•●○•°○○●○•°

"Miss Collen?"

"What's up buttercup?"

"When we get to the far North..."

"Mm"

"-And to the place the gobblers have taken everyone.."

".."

"Do you think we're strong enough to do it? To defeat them & make it out?"

Indra paused, contemplating the question the small brunette had posed her as they trekked up the cold hillside, only a few hours into their true journey. She knew Lyra wouldn't take molly coddling.

"Yes and no" she sighed and stopped walking to face the girl.

"I believe we have a good lot- a good chance- riddled with determination & brave, brave people- but I don't know the forces that they have there- but we will try as hard as we can & truly Lyra, with someone like you and people like the Gyptians to fight alongside I couldn't be more honoured or more hopeful"

"I hope that was the answer you wanted Miss Belaquar" She tickled Lyra under her chin before continuing her trek.

Yet spinning round to add- "And you can call me Indra you know!"

°•••○●●•°○°●°●°○•●°○°•○○○•°•●●••°○●

"Quickly now!!"

Everyone was hurrying as they passed over the seedy cliff. The tumultuous drop looming from below, fear creeping up into the minds of the man from between the very cracks in the rock.

They set wooden planks to pass people, equipment & supplies across the rocky casm of the mountainside.

With most of the Gyptians and Lyra across already it was now down to the two to make their steps.

"You go first- so I can be here to catch you" Lee said firmly.

"Don't you-" Indra spun round to speak but deflated at Lee's worried expression.

"Fine but I'll be as pip as peaches you'll see love" she said softly yet promised, hand on his coat right over his heart.

She passed across with ease, sending a wink back his way yet a coil settling across and around her chest at the realisation it was Lee's turn.

He let out a nervous bark of a laugh at her sudden expression change.

"We've faced worse babe"

"Be careful"

" course"

Lee began across the plank fine- afterall he was used to climbing the side of the balloon sometimes when he really had to.

He was used to heights, he was used to winds, but the thing was, he usually had the side of a balloon latticed with rope to hold onto...

When the wind suddenly picked up it threw him off, teetering to the side slightly with a sharp inhale.

Indra reached forward but he shook his head.

"I'm ok!" He flashed her what he hoped was a reasurring grin that only half reached his eyes in all truthfulness.

He took several more steps slowly, almost across.

"Told you- easy as pi-"

Suddenly the board he was standing on dropped out beneath his very feet.

He yelled as he felt himself start to fall.

"LEE!!" Indra screamed reaching down and just grabbing the edge of his sleeve desperately.

"Lee! Reach up to me! Please baby- come on- COME ON!"

He clawed desperately at the rock trying to reach up and grab her other hand.

"Ind- I c-can't-" he puffed into the cold as he struggled.

"Yes you can! Yes you can- come on- don't you fucking dare leave me-" she croaked shakily.

Joined by several gytians, they reached further down than she could whilst grasping him and they all heaved him back up onto the rock path.

He lay face down breathing heavily- clutching at Indra.

They breathed as one, ragged and sharp with relief.

"Ind- Ind- Ind" he repeated like a prayer- whilst she pulled him into a tight hug rocking slightly with her boyfriend safe in her arms- Hester buried into their sides.

"Shhh its ok- I've got you" she whispered.

He looked up- skin paled with shock & fear yet alert & cold with stark red against the pallor.

He put his hands either side of her face and they kissed deep & desperately, the pain still racing.

•○•●○•°•●•●•

Thats everything so far! Pls let me know thoughts!! And yes ending with a lil bit of "tongues battling for dominance!!"

[bezgoesboo]

––  m i c   t a p !    “ an’... ohp !  we’re live ! ”    

               r u s t l e   r u s t l e . . .   

“ well, if you’re listenin’, welcome to another episode of witchin’ hour, in which i’ll do a real valiant job of wastin’ your precious time. 

                             we got the tunes, we got the loons, and the night’s fresher                              than a pack of fuckin’ mini mart twinkies. yep. i’m bez.                                                              whaddya say we get jinkie with it ? ”

or, alternatively:  my name is linc, this is bez holmes, and i hope you brought your schnazziest seatbelts ‘cause, oh bud... you’re in for quite the trip.

( timothee chalamet, ghost, he/him & cismale ) is that ( another one bites the dust ) by ( queen ) playing? guess ( killian beelzebub holmes)’s comin’ in hot! heard folks say the ( twenty three ) year old ( local radio host ) was at the thanksgiving fair, ( throwin’ darts at the balloon wall with his buds ) when chaos ensued. during the glitch, ( he was killed by one of his best supernatural pals he was tryin’ to talk down while everyone else was bookin’ it to the woods, but ain’t the faintest clue he’s dead… yikes ).

b a c k g r o u n d    .  .  .

the autumn of 1959 brought the youngest holmes sibling into existence and knocked out their mother in one fell swoop. killian beelzebub holmes was born to mr. holmes and his late wife at precisely 3:33am just before an uncharacteristically frosty dusk.

mrs. holmes chose the name killian long before her second-born ever killed her, so... heh !  joke’s on her !  bez’s pops didn’t have the heart to call him *cough* er, killian, so the family settled for the next best thing so they could still honor his mother’s wishes: beelzebub. except... well. that still was a lil problematic, given the timing of his birth. and callin’ beelzebub on class attendance? not exactly the best look. hence, the nickname bez was born, and he’s been goin’ by it ever since.

bez has an older sister lee and the two are as thick as thieves. growin’ up, they always kept their father on his toes –– wherever the holmes kids go, trouble follows.

mr. holmes served as county sheriff until he was killed by his second wife when bez was 13 and lee was 14. lee went back to art school after the local police department covered up the bear out as a fuckin’ armed robbery gone wrong. lee ‘n bez were sworn to secrecy, but nothin’, not even authoritative men in police badges, can erase the image of stepmonster slashin’ dad to bits and lettin’ him fall face first into a plate of spaghetti.

bez never liked stepmonster to begin with, but killin’ their dad was the kicker. lee returned to art school and bez struggled to keep the peace in the household. the bitch stepped up the loving stepma act until a year later, when she wigged out again ‘n landed him in the hospital for a couple days. after that, lee returned home, ‘n it was officially holmes vs. mama bear.

movin’ out was the dream, but unfortunately, mr. holmes overextended when he bought this nice shiny new house for his new wife ‘n kids; most of his insurance money went to getting the house out from underwater, ‘n the rest went to funeral expenses. so... the kids were kinda stuck with her. still are.

bez never let himself be stupid enough to dream ‘bout leavin’ letum falls. he likes it here. he’s got his people. throughout school, he romped ‘round with the cool kids. hung out with all the supernaturals. in fact, you’d be hard pressed to find bez holmes chillin’ ‘round anyone who’s actually human. contrary to his sister, his father’s death didn’t turn him off from supernaturals –– if anythin’, it made him desperate to prove to himself just what a wildcard stepmonster was.

after high school graduation, bez pestered his way into workin’ at the local radio station. what started as a simple soundboarding gig morphed into hostin’ his very own show, the witchin’ hour, on which he talks about letum falls’ spooky happenings and engages with live callers. he’s got a sleep with me bit –– callers name celebrities, fictional characters, or even existing locals bez has to seduce via song and cheesy pickup lines. basically, the whole show’s a hangout with bez –– more often ‘n not, he’s high as a bird. so the witchin’ hour’s got itself a steady cult of listeners. bez loves every second of it.

he’s got a reputation for bein’ sexually ambiguous. he was outcasted pretty young as bein’ a lil... off? never into sports. liked to paint his nails colors sometimes. borrow lee’s shirts. his dad never raised issue with it, but stepmonster definitely had her reservations. still does. bez holmes is a kid some fathers told their sons to steer clear of. for fear of, bez’ll laugh as he tells ya, spreadin’ it around.

labels are for chumps, he’ll tell ya, mid-cigarette drag. size y’up real good. odds are, if you’re attractive ‘n mysterious in some way, he’ll fuck ya. ( not countin’  six months of abstinence in 1980 when he was convinced everyone he fucked wound up dyin’ two weeks later... there were a string of incidental deaths. but honestly, sometimes ?  he thinks ‘bout it. )

fuckin’ klutz. yeah, he skateboards. yeah, he looks cool doin’ it. yeah, he’ll even wear his shades while he’s doin’ it at night. but surprise him? make him laugh? he’ll trip over his own two feet.

addicted to cinnamon waffles, enough syrup to drown atlantis a second time. he always haunts the local diner. when he’s not there, he’s likely playin’ pinball or skeeball at the local arcade, or slurpin’ down a rootbeer float and annoyin’ the living shit outta earl at the mini mart.

if it’s illegal? sign him up.

he owns a shit ton of thrifted clothes. lots of chunky jackets, v-necks, rings, necklaces. funky pants. he’s recognized around town by his crazy curls. they’re never tame. he’s always lookin’ artfully disheveled. smirkin’. stealin’ looks.

t h e    f a i r     .  .  .

bez was hangin’ out with his supernatural buds ( wanted connections )when all hell broke loose. he was actually makin’ a fool of himself with balloon darts, but he made a ten buck bet he could win a stupid hat.

while everyone else ran, bez tried to talk down one particular friend ( wanted connection ) who was tryna keep themselves from attackin’ him. he got so far as to get ‘em calm, place a hand on their shoulder. lean in to look ‘em in the eye real close. 

“ hey man, hey now. listen. y’don’t gotta do this. killin’ ain’t punk, ‘kay? y’hate blood, hear me? i believe in you, ‘n even though you serve killer looks –– you’re not a killer. ”

even in the face of death, this kid fuckin’ joked around, and... basically this friend slashes his throat and ripped his heart out right after bez managed a hopeful smile. talk ‘bout a magical fuckin’ friendship.

lee and dean hollis took bez’s body with them when they fled the scene.

bez woke up a few days later in the woods near the fairgrounds. he wandered ‘n wandered, almost in a sleep-like trance, ‘til he reached dean’s house. walked in, blinked right at the guy. they exchanged words, albeit bitter ones, before bez left and walked on over to the radio station. did his show like normal, like he’d never even died. no memory of the glitch. no nothin’. 

heads on over to earl’s mini mart like usual. but earl won’t check him out. earl isn’t hearin’ him. so he fuckin’ leaves with a bag of doritos and a big bottle of mountain dew. runs into his boyfriend, xander chapell. all’s fine ‘n well. he’s overjoyed to see the other male. everythin’s normal.

the next mornin’, he slinks home. finds lee cryin’ in her room. pieces it together and thinks it must be dean hollis. must be ‘cause of that asshole.

c u r r e n t l y    .  .  .

ain’t nobody got the heart to tell this poor kid he died. he’s dead. and since he doesn’t know he’s a ghost ?  he thinks wakin’ up near hose weird ass woods, near the fairgrounds ? it’s all a dream. he thinks the worsened insomnia ? ah. that’s just the weather. ‘n when his hand sometimes goes through things ? when people sometimes don’t see him ? some witch is probably havin’ trouble controllin’ their abilities.

stepmomma has a hunch bez’s spirit might be hauntin’ the house. she keeps tryna sage it. tryna figure out what’s gonna help get her stepson to the beyond. ‘cept bez doesn’t know this, and lee’s playin’ damage control.

he’s still so hopelessly in love with xander, but neither of these two goons have actually shared that with one another. it’s all in the looks. the touches. and now... there’s an added bonus that bez is dead –– technically a goner, unless he never resolves whatever’s keepin’ him here. which, y’know. he won’t. ‘cause he’s got no clue.

can he please get a waffle ?  now some of the waitstaff won’t serve him at the diner ! the fuckin’ nerve !  it’s really okay because he’s got duffy ‘n georgia there to help him out. but damn. no one’s ever been this cold ‘cause of his off-color humor before. what’d he do ?  lord knows.

weird shit’s happenin’. people in town are actin’ strange. something’s up. but then again, somethin’ always is. so bez doesn’t mind it. keeps on hummin’ his stupid tunes. carries on with his show. the radio station producers are scared shitless ‘cause like... this dead kid keeps goin’ on the air. what kinda cruel joke is this, huh ?

c u r r e n t     c o n n e c t i o n s  .  .  .

older sister – lee holmes.  the holmes kids are revered and feared. always up to somethin’... tragic, what happened to ‘em, but lordie. that dead sheriff raised some weird kids.

low key love of his life – xander chapelle.  they started dating a few months ago and bez... never... expected... this. he ain’t the feelings type, no sir. but xander lights somethin’ in him. somethin’ new. yeesh. now you’ve got him all fluttery.

chaos crew – maya shen.  partners in crime, in an endless pacman and pinball war. they’ll beat one another’s scores back ‘n forth and back ‘n forth, never ending. bez is fascinated by maya’s family line ‘n all. she’s great to have ‘round, too, when he’s got a hankering for a cig but needs a decent light.

row, row, row your boat the fuck away from me – dean hollis.  dude was pretty cool, ‘til y’know... he fuckin’ dumped his feelin’s on lee and skipped town. yeah, football. yeah, nfl. cool beans, huh? what’d he have to go and fuck with his sister’s heart for? and now that he’s back and lee’s actin’ weird... bez knows he’s the cause of it for sure. and he doesn’t like it one bit.

grew up together – georgia duchannes.  bez, lee, ‘n georgia all grew up peas in a pod. mr. duchannes took over the role as sheriff because he sniffed somethin’ fishy goin’ on in the department and wanted to protect bez ‘n lee. bez gets a real kick outta georgia, ‘n folks even thought he had a crush on her back in the day. which is hilarious. ‘cause everyone ‘n their mother always knew georgia’d end up with vanetten.

the case he’s gonna crack – teejay vanetten.  bez always liked vanetten, thought he was a chill guy, y’know? a lil’ vanilla, but hey. not everyone can be as ace as him. the dude’s always been a lil’ defensive around bez though, ‘cause of georgia. bez thinks it’s funny. plays into it sometimes, just to get a rise outta him. after the glitch, it becomes clear teejay’s goin’ through something not human, so bez is tryna get lee on board to help this guy figure out his shit.

w a n t e d    c o n n e c t i o n s    .

the best supernatural friend who killed him.  bonus points if things get, like. real fuckin’ angsty.

past hookups.  bez has gotten around. guys, gals, non-binary pals. sex is sex.

supernatural kool krew.  this squad has a runs with wolves kinda vibe. bez might be the glue that holds it together. keepin’ up with supernaturals as a human, though? fuckin’ full time job.

avid radio listeners / callers.   i... would love for some routine callers? maybe some peeps he knows from around town who he has ongoin’ banter with on the air?

goofy gays.  all the gay vibes, just... we need a power gay squad mmkay?

enemies.  i’m sure bez is on a lot of people’s shit lists. he speaks his mind. he goes outta his way to be a nuisance. but he’d just find this whole thing abso-fuckin-lutely hilarious.

music jam peeps.  music is a huge part of bez’s everyday life. he listens to bands more than he listens to people. ‘n he dabbles in some musical shit himself. piano, some songwritin’ here ‘n there. nothin’ too major, but it’d be cool to have some pals who also feel as connected to music as him. he does, after all, run a radio show.

post-glitch connections.   dude roams ‘round letum falls a lot now. he did before, too, but maybe there are some people who knew of him but didn’t know him before who’re now startin’ to talk with him? ‘cause they can see he’s a ghost, ‘n they feel bad? i dunno. at this point, bez is startin’ to yammer on ‘n on to whoever’s gonna listen. maybe they just see one another in odd ass places. like earl’s mini mart. or the arcade. or maybe this person’s willin’ to speak to someone for him when they’re doin’ that stupid ass ignorin’ game again.

[teacupfulofstarshine]

appreciation station

buckle up my little galaxy, it’s time for STARSHINE GETS SAPPY ABOUT NEW YEAR’S AND RAMBLES LIKE A LOON

so, i just wanna start by saying how much i love this community? like, as a whole? this was the first online fandom i became so invested in! i did write fic before this, primarily for vld (this was back when we had, like, 2 seasons and there was still hope). but i was never a PART of that community - the discourse was just too much and the fandom was too big for me to truly get invested, y’know? 

this is the first real online community i’ve become a part of and BOY do i love it. you all made me feel SO LOVED and SO WELCOME and honestly sometimes you go through some shit in your life and you just need people to be sunshiney and oh my lord do you people have it in SPADES. every time i’ve needed a pick me up, you have all been so loving and wonderful and supportive and incredibly patient when fic takes forever (i’m working on that, i promise). so basically, thank you all. you’re all incredible.

there are, of course, a few people who deserve to be recognized by name and i’m sticking THAT nonsense below the cut, so if this is where you stop reading, please know that i love and appreciate every single one of you, and we are going to GET this BREAD in 2019 BITCHES. it’s the year of the bisexual, and i’m gonna make it my (bi)tch. <3 

OKAY SAPPY TIME HERE WE GO

@accio-hufflepuff-power1 NICKY!!! you were one of the very first people to ask to be tagged in my writing! (i think you were the first one, actually). i think you’re amazing, and i know i’m shitty at answering messages but i love you so much you’re such a gr8 friend 

@the-frosty-doctor WE BECAME MUTUALS BACK WHEN YOU WERE STILL GOING BY romaning-daydreams DO YOU REMEMBER? you were my very first sanders sides mutual and you were the very first person to hear about lovely dark and deep! that fic would never exist without you, and i’ll be grateful forever. 

@ironwoman359 HEY TAAAAAAYLOOOOOR so you reblogged every single pattonella piece with commentary and honestly that commentary is one of the things that inspired me to keep writing it. i would sit there and refresh the notes and wait for you to see it and rb it and now we’re BUDS and it’s GREAT you’re such a gr8 writer i rlly look up to you i’m still amazed that you follow lil’ ol’ me you’re great i love you <3 

@ethospathoslogan PETTY! BITCH! WIFE! i was so incredibly fucking nervous to talk to you bc i had read and fangirled over your fic for like, three weeks before i ever messaged you. (also i thought you were like 24, but that’s more down to my inability to read roman numerals than anything). but i was SO HAPPY that we started talking bc i think you’re AMAZING and you’re the loml babe i’m so happy to be your wife. i love your work and i love you and you were my first internet wife i stan you so hard. 

@breloomings DANIEL!!! i was so nervous to talk to you bc your art is SO GOOD and it makes me SO HAPPY and i really hope you’re doing okay! i know we haven’t talked in a few months bc we’re both so busy but i really, truly hope that you’re doing okay and i hope we get to talk a lot more soon! 

@backatthebein RILEY you were one of the very first people i befriended! you were a huge supporter of pattonella just like taylor was and you always encouraged me even when i didn’t have any confidence in myself. i have had plenty of anxiety crises with you in earshot, and you’ve always been there for me. i love you so much, riley, you’ve always been in my corner and i hope you know i’m always in yours. plus, you send me great posts all the time! they’re either analogical or bisexual memes or memes in general or positivity support and honestly you’re amazing i love you sm 

@notveryglittery DAAAAANIIIII do you remember when you sent me an ask like OMG YOU FOLLOWED ME I’M SO HONORED and i realized that i hadn’t and i was like “THAT IS A CRIMINAL MISTAKE!” so i followed you on the SPOT. (tbh i thought i was following you already, i think tumblr unfollowed you for me bc tumblr.) you’re the royality stan to my analogical stand and i absolutely adore that we hardcore ship along an axis bc it makes writing fic SO MUCH FUN! usually if i have analogical i also have royality and vice versa with your writing and it’s just. mmm. yes. iconic. i love you so much, you’re so creative and inventive and supportive and you’re beautiful. 

@shesavampirequeen AAAARIIIIIIEEEEELL! we first met bc you popped into my inbox to say “hey” once and you just kept coming back! i actively looked for you in my inbox bc seeing you always made my day, and i always looked forward to your comments! and then i learned you were ALSO an analogical stan and my heart was SOLD! you’re sweet and funny and so, so kind and i am SO happy that i reached out to get to know you better bc it was one of the best decisions of my life. you’re absolutely amazing in every way, ari, and i love you <3

@bumblebeekitten BEEEEEE BEE BEE BEE BEE BEE! i first met YOU because i asked for questions about ldad lore to take my mind off my computer being broken. you YEETed yourself into my askbox and you asked like twelve thousand questions and they were all about things i hadn’t even thought about before! and that was GREAT because while i was busy answering your questions, i completely forgot the panic attack i’d been having about my computer! and now we’re BFFS and we’re WIVES and we’re RP PARTNERS and i honestly love all of the above! you’re so creative and talented and beautiful and i love you so, so much. i’m so happy we’re friends now <3 

@fangirltothefullest T A S H I! we first met because you reblogged one of my sneak previews of lovely dark and deep and said “i would love to do fanart of this!” and then i YEETED MY PHONE ACROSS THE ROOM and screamed for five minutes. i STILL can’t believe that we’re friends, you’re so amazing and sweet and awesome! i love our rp, i love that i took one look at your fusions and was like ALL OF THESE ARE MINE NOW ALLOW ME TO WRITE ALL YOUR FUCKING LORE and you were like THAT SOUNDS N E A T I’M TOTALLY DOWN TO LET YOU DO THAT! and now i co-mod the blog and just. halk;fas;dlkfj alskdf .asf ad. i am so INCREDIBLY LUCKY to have met you and i’m so grateful that you let me do this and i’m so happy that we’re bffs bc i love you so much, honey. you’re amazing <3 

[mum-for-da-sons]

Very messy Delta review

Hey gang, i sat & typed & spiraled while listening to delta for the first time just now, so if that interests you to read barely legible thoughts, it’ll be under the read more thing. dang i’m sad!! BUt spoiler alert: GOOOD ALBUM! I’m SAD!! (do note I don’t find the album or many tracks all-around too sad, I’m just a depressed bih)

Delta thoughts: okay i’m not gonna really edit what i wrote but for everyone’s sanity i’ll bold the song titles, okay?

42: BINCH! See a sign, I need some guiding light,,, eff ME UP OKAY?? This is such a strong start i’m already getting teary-eyed, huh. Ugh, it’s so satisfying… well effing done lads,, well done

Guiding Light: Hot dang the whispered beginning?? I really need to fix my computer speakers because this sounds heavenly in my over-ear headphones,, gosh dang. Discover some new TRUTH! Gosh dang this is not a comprehensive review in the slightest but i don’t care!! Binch!! I can’t even say anything good… when beloved or darkness visible makes me cry, i guess beloved is fourth? So if it does it’ll be first, anyway, when i start crying maybe i have something cooler to say. Not crazy about the “dubstep build” on this, after the bridge, just because i don’t believe it, like it’s not long enough, and resolves unconvincingly. But, anyway.

Woman: literally FRICK i thought if i say was next this start is cool and very Winston. Oh vibes?? Oh worm?? Woman?? I’m like 15 seconds in and this is… yes. Can you ever really know? No. is ths song even about anything lol i don’t think i care?? Issa vibe, gang. Chorus?? Eff me up. He said frosty… wendy’s come collect. Oh that was the pre-chorus?? This is f*cking me up… VIBES. i ‘ve been waiting for them to try this in a song of theirs and not like a cover.. I knew they were capable…. The range they’re displaying rn? I love it. I love them wtf!!  Oooh man i wanna see this live? There’s this drumstick noise, like rimshots? That sounds so satisfying. Yes, clackety clack. This is nice. Nice song. Don’t really know what they’re singing, bt this is warm. I like it. Mumford & sons finally said it’s 2018, huh. I just got a youtube notification of me commenting on their radio appearance and i literally said “the range they’re showing? Fantastic” and yanno what,, same

Beloved: this song started like right away huh. He said darling… dang he did that. He’s fitting a lot of words in on this one. Ohh the lord has a plan? It is hard to understand… i love these lyrics.. Big brain meme. Are you afraid? The attack.. Hand come through the mirror?? That visual!!! O f*ck me up. Before you leave :(( yeah it’s getting to me aHAHA.ohh this breakdown? Yes. these drums are especially nice. Ugh i really missed these guys wtf :(. AND AS YOU LEAVE, YOU MUST KNOW YOU ARE BELOVED> yes. Yes. as you LEeeeEEeaaveee. See my children playing at your feet?? BOI.. i’m so soft wtf.. They’re really putting it all out… i wanna hug them i’m so… this is so sweet aw. Oh no the song is fading, no don’t do that song

What song is this the piano can f*ck me up: ben man, you’re doin that huh. No literally did we have to jump to this painful… frick. This violin? Is nice. WE SAW BIRTH AND DEATH. Oh frick. They’re just going for it this is a lot i’m soft. Lemme actually see what song this is lol.. It’s The Wild. i have like chills & i can’t tell if it’s because i’m cold or not. Do not be afraid :(. OH they stripped it back!!! THIS IS NICE! Binch! Puts the fear of God in me :( this is so nice .. it’s hard to pick what to focus on. What’s that i see binch? I think it’s the wild… marcus is really do THAT with these vocals, huh. There was like a breath and.. The atmosphere during this part?? Nat Geo who??? Ohhh i like this so much.. It’s like a soundtrack.. The sampling of noise?? The background?? It’s cool, doesn’t specifically sound like them at all, but, aw these drums :( now it’s like a war movie.. This is so interesting. Those drums remind me of the drums in winter winds that i can sometimes here & it’s very drill-like and marching band-esqe and i love it. Aw birds??? You know what this reminds me of…. I won’t say

Next song: marcus is playing no games with these vocals, jesus. October Skies.. Isn’t this his favorite one… ooh ted I hear that bass,, eff it up.OooooOOOoooHH. The range… i love these guys. I’m blinded by the light of october skies… the movie with Jake Gylenhaal, and in the valley I am free :( where’d the silehute go? OOOooooOOOOooooHH YOUr’e esesjfsfshesal!! The fear of what’s to come.. CRIPlin’ me :( binch. Is this synth lowkey?? Brand it on my mind is such a great visual, like the “press my nose up to the glass around your heart” line.. Who wrote it. Oh is the sonG_ OOOOOOoooooOOOOOOoooooHHHH. Maggie rogers is that you? Hot dang

An upbeater!! Wipe those tears baby! Is this the just smoke of this album. This is.. Slip Away. “stoic smile” i see you… haha. Ooh this chorus is nice COME AND SUFFER HERE, LADIES! Mood!! Holding my breathe for you? F! In this violence of a mind’s eye… i like everything except maybe---- ohh this falsetto?? I’m.. i’m tearing.. Oooh we just found a song to cry to in the middle of the night, huh. It’s misleading with the beat vs. the lyrics.. I wouldn’t have it any other way!! Gosh i’m so depressed! Lol!! There’s a pulsing beat of some kind that’s nice.. Also some nice guitar work on here, some clackety things… go gently… be still…. Go gently….now… be still… Go Gentlyyyyy nowwwww, be stiiiilllll. Ugh they.. They’re doing this… i’m so proud of them wtf. Is this winston?? Who is singing.. Marcus?? I can’t.. Tell? No i think its marcus but we’ve truly never heard that high-end from him for that long

Okay: next song is pretty interesting- ooh! Right off the bat! This has to be the one they said sounded like ngalma? However you spell it… clap clap clap clap clap, this is a drum-machiner one for sure. I will be yours & you will be mine, ever our lives will be entwined binch! This noise after “my rose of sharon” is a mood. Ugh this is so cute.. Imagine being happy w/ someone else, what a concept ! eeeeeee yuh! That’s what they’re singing in the back.. My rose of sharon, my rose of sharon, BRR BRR BRN NER! Did the song-- what’s up with these abrupt endings

That being said, Picture You sounds v vibey right off the bat. Okay lads! I thought it best you didn’t knowww. I’m so proud of Marcus for flaunting these vocals, i stg, I’ve spoken on this before but... like he can do that!! I’m so glad he’s,, doing it! Ooh the “away” is v nice. I love full-stops in music, where the sound gets sucked out like here or just stops entirely… yes boys. Okay.. not crazy about this kind of.. Breakdown but it’s still cool. Just not in-rand as much as some other things. I mean, this sound is V different of course but they’re workin’ it. Okay i kind of stopped paying attention for a sec… there’s sampling… ohhh oh no it’s getting dark… hohoho no guys.. I’m excited but the anxiety is jumping out… holy smokes this is cool tho. It’s pretty. Hope that never comes, that comes to all.. Torture without end… yet from the great flames no light,,, but rather.. .DARKNESS VISIBLE. I��m gonna check if it didn’t seamlessly bleed into darkness visible…

Oh it did!! Their minds!! God, i already know i love darkness visible,, it was my pre-album listen fave on details about it alone,, we’re depressed sweeties let’s pop off… it’s so nice >:(. And just like that it ended!!!! BINCH!!! Ooh they’re like not even vocally in that one… i like that ish!! Not the “them not being in it” in that way but OOH! That was effing cool

If I Say: is still v v nice,, sounds effing expansive and beautiful with good headphones, i’m picking up all the lil details and prettiness.. The synth line after “if i say i love you, well then i love you” is sooo satisfying too. Ugh this orchestra,,, it’s building.. Truly their minds were so big on this album, huh. I’ll tell you what It doesn’t mean that i feel better! It doesn’t mean that I feel better! I’m, haha i still kinda hate this chorus but their so passionate i can’t hate it all the way,, like they love this ish and are into it & i love them so it’s allll good homies. I dig. I’ll be fake and wild out when they play it live, don’t worry. But peace you never find :( the guitar tone is crispyyyy,, the instrumentation… ugh it’s so nice. Violins can murder me or someat and I’d accept it. AND IF I SAY I LOVE YOU, THEN I LOVE YOUUUU. Ugh,, so so nice man

What’s NEXT: ooh some seamlessness in that transition.. .is this ghost of tom joad i’m hearing lol, mortal once again!! Oh this is a mood, freak.. Sigh no more marcus really jumped out on this one. This shuffling maraca thing is so nice. I’ll hold you by the jaw!! Hoo hoo bihhh. “It took a wild heart to tame mIIiine” this is so nice wtf!! Ugh this is so nice. I wouldn’t have you any other way,, awwwwwWWW!! Who want a love that makes sense anyway? I’ll effing say! Ugh this is very nice. These lyrics are so interesting… this is a good one guys, quiet & sweet but there’s some pretty cool things also going on, like it’s simple but its… this is it, ya know? This piano is sweet too. This whole thing is sweet, maybe that’s a dumb word to use but. This is so sweeeeet ugh!!! The vocal riffs on “mine” … ugh!! I kind of like the echoey vocals too.. Soft rain patter for two seconds at the end??

Reverse noises w/ a big breath from Marcus: let’s effing go w/ this album, gang!! What song is this reminding me of… whispers in the dark? He did some late-babel, early wilder mind voice thing.. Wait it’s forever isn’t it. I heard this one i think, like 3 yrs ago.. Yup, Dare I Say Forever.. I still don’t like do it for the girl” cos it’s too straightfoward, ,”i’ve known pious women” LOL where is this going. Only mumford & sons can really put that word in a song and just, keep singing. We stan tho, we stan. Think of london,,, we love. The DAAaaYS you defend will turn to gold,, this could easily be the last song on the album, this is like a last-call at the bar song,, in a good way, i’ve linked arms with my buddies & we’re all yelling this song like goons,, yes. Lighters a-waving,, are we too sentimental to not look back atnd!! WOW he realy did that with stare!! I couldnt finish typing that.. Is this part auto-tuned?? Dare I say.. Why? I’m choosing to hear it as a vocoder and many harmonies so i don’t hate that but uhaha they.. Hm they tried that i guess. Other than that the vi- oh why did the violin exit like that

The song is bouncing in my ears weird!! It’s giving me monster vibes atm. There’s a definite thread of messages goin thru this album & oof i love being sad,, the children come & go as you weep? Lol i love being sad. I am a waste?? My words are empty [as the bed we made]. Wilder mind is comin out on this, the album, huh!! The optimism on this album is-- I”LL MEET YOU OUT THE DELTAAA< WHERE THE RIVER”S RUINNING TO THE SEA,, GOD i love it. Ooh these drums, cool cool, it’s.. This is cool. Also sampling marcus’s children is sure way to eff everyone up, but that’s for another post,, ooooh i’m soft!! When it feels like nothing else matters :((((( lets go with this build!!! I wanna go for a run and have a cry.. Ooh man i took a moment there… this is so nice :( i’v missed them!!! Whats goin on with his vocals here,, the recording is like too close,, on purpose?? Hm. dust to dust!! I see you!! Marcus is truly giving his all here,, ugh I”m so proud of all of them, they put their LIVES on this, didn’t they!!! This song is such a feeling,, i can’t describe it i’m sad, but awwwW! I don’t kno wtf these kids are saying but wow that was cute as all heck!!! I”m so soft!! The album is over!! They did it!! Frick i don’t know how to feel!! Good really, but wow!!! Trying to not let my own sadness affect this review haha but !! what a nice body of work they produced!! In all the best ways, mostly!! I love them!!  I wanna have another listen!! Aw!!!! Frick guys. Frick. Can’t imagine anyone wants to slog thru this and have a read but,, anyway thanks if you did i guess, special thanks to Mumford & Sons for being my favorite band and always :( always being there when I need it. I needed this. wow. wow. Wowww!!!  Oof, haha i’m sad

Okay wait also he should’ve repeated the “I’ll meet you at the delta part” at least one more time but eff my criticism that song captures all stages of life and i truly wanna cry, so there’s that. Theses guys put it all out there & I really love them for that.