Book miss P: My version in the movie is a little chaotic, but she loves her children very much, so she's a good representation of me.
Myron: You were at least represented, and Jack and I were completely excluded!
Caul: I'm not in the movie, so it sucks.
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MPHFP Incorrect Quotes
Miss Peregrine - I'm sure Jake has lots of friends back in Florida.
Y/n (Jake's sibling) - *starts laughing hysterically*
Y/n - Jake? Having friends? Ha! That boys more antisocial than I am and I prefer animals over people-
Enoch - *desperately trying to finish his food without laughing*
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millard: today's officially one year since i've had surgery.
hugh: wooo congrats king!! 🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
millard: surgery on my shoulder??? from when i got shot???
hugh: wooo congrats king!! 🇺🇲🇺🇲🇺🇲
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Posts the peculiars would make part 4 >:)
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Jacob: Miss Peregrine , I've got a question:Can an Ymbrine love another person?
Miss P: An Ymbrine takes care of children Jake , she cannot marry nor have children.
Jacob: What if the Ymbrine falls in love with a woman?
Miss P : I'm not su-
Jacob:What about if the woman in question is another Ymbrine?
Miss P: *loud silence*
Jacob: So?
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Bird's Birthday
Horace: Miss Peregrine's birthday cake is ready, all that's left is to put the candles on it with her age on them.
Noor: Okay, tell me how old she will be so I can buy the candles.
*the children look at each other without knowing*
Noor: Wait, none of you know how old she is?
Horace: It's rude to ask a lady's age.
Enoch: She is over 100 and under 200 years old, will she get mad if we put a candle that says "old" on it?
Emma: This is not funny Enoch!
Horace: What now? What are we going to do, the cake needs candles!
Noor: I'm going to buy a candle that says happy birthday.
Horace: Yes! That's perfect! Noor you're brilliant.
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Miss P needs a break from Jacob
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Enoch, in a high voice, holding Barbie: Hey, Ken! I was thinking of going back to school and starting a career!
Emma, in a deep voice, holding Ken: Nonsense, Barbie. You’re staying home and having my kids.
Jacob: What the heck are you guys doing?
Enoch: Playing systemic oppression.
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Jacob: *trying to ask discreetly to the others if they are part of the LGBT community* So, what attracts you?
Horace: Toxicity.
Jacob: What ?
Emma: Just say you're attracted to men, please.
Horace: That's not as funny.
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Miss Peregrine: "in my time, coca wine was much better."
Jacob: * Whispers to the other children * "In her time, wine was made with cocaine."
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millard: goodnight night.
jacob: sleep tight.
enoch: don’t let the bedbugs crawl up to your ear and whisper threatening things that make you question yourself.
emma: great, now horace is crying.
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some wight: once I tried killing this preppy british kid on his way to school but before I could even get a threat out he said ‘please don’t hesitate’ and I was caught so off guard that this eleven year old basically just asked me to kill him that i just stood there as he walked away.
horace:
horace: oh, you mean me.
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Imagine mphfpc exactly as it is but instead of saying "Rise up dead man, rise up😈" Enoch says "Wakie wakiee🥰🤗"
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*Enoch passing by with a bag*
Miss P : Oh hi Enoch, what are you doing?
Enoch : preparing a new toy!
*goes away*
Miss P : Oh... Great, have fun then!
*Fiona approaches*
Fiona:Miss Peregrine, I can't find some of my hens anymore!
Miss P: Holy birds! ENOCH!
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Miss Peregrine: 'I thought you were going to get up?'
Enoch, laying in his nest: 'I was going to but then I thought...why?'
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Myron: you enslaved me!
Caul: you literally premeditated my death!
Myron: because you trapped me and left me to starve first
Alma: Birds... Am I the only one in this family who didn't plan to kill anyone?
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