#Okay this 'teaser' was more than half the chapter lol

[jessicanjpa]

happy mother's day

It's Alice's first time baking with Esme! An excerpt from this 1957 one-shot. Esme POV.

"I'm home!" I called out from the garage. "And I could use some help!"

I heard Alice's delicate sigh three floors up. By the time I got around to the trunk and opened it, she had flitted to my side wearing a new striped yellow dress and a pitiful look of resignation. She stuck out her arms and I began filling them with bags of groceries.

"You don't really have to do this, you know," I teased her, scooping up the last four bags myself.

"I promised," she said, and her pout turned upward into the smile that was never very far away.

"You did! And it's a chance to learn something new. The older we get, the more we'll treasure opportunities like this."

"I suppose I will. But ugh! Why do you buy so much at the grocery store, and so many things that smell funny?"

We set the groceries down onto the kitchen counter all in a neat line. Alice rooted through the bags, her nose wrinkling more with each one. "I don't even know what this one is!" she complained, pulling out an enormous zucchini with two reluctant fingertips.

"A zucchini. It's a kind of squash. That's what we're baking," I reminded her. "Zucchini bread. And you know how important it is to keep up appearances, especially when we're new. Some of it does go to waste, but we end up donating a lot of it in the end."

We had enjoyed a good, long stay in Klamath Falls. Emmett had, unfortunately, had an accident near the middle of our time there. But it had been an easy cleanup, so it hadn't interrupted our stay. Edward had been able to earn his bachelor's in music performance and Rosalie had finished a degree in bio pre-med. Carlisle and I were fiercely proud of both of their achievements. And even though Emmett had drifted aimlessly between majors for his entire stay at Southern Oregon college, my mother-heart had nearly burst to see him come so far. He hadn't even been able to read when Carlisle had first changed him.

But six years was pushing it; the children hadn't really known what to do with themselves after graduation, knowing we wouldn't have much time left, and Carlisle was starting to get jokes at work about having found the fountain of youth. So after some traveling, we had ended up here in northern Michigan. Edward, Rosalie, and Emmett had just started high school again last week. Alice was torn; we had all hoped that she and Jasper would both be joining the others in school this time, but Jasper was still reluctant. The rest of us all thought he was ready. The only way our newest vegetarian was ever going to trust himself at school was to go and practice being at school. He was dragging his feet and he knew it, but it was his choice in the end. I just wished Alice would go ahead without him and enjoy herself.

My darling girl, full of sunshine! I busied myself getting the ingredients ready, smiling as I watched Alice take the groceries out of the bags, peering at each item as if it were from another planet. Out of all of us, she was the only one who had no memories of her human life—no memories whatsoever of things as commonplace as eating and preparing food. The whole concept was completely foreign to her, and until today she had skillfully avoided my every cajoling effort to join me in the kitchen. Everyone except her had taken at least one turn by now, even Emmett and Jasper. But I had won in the end.

"It's almost Mother's Day," I said to her last Tuesday. "And there's something I really would love; let's see if you can figure it out without any hints."

That was all it took; Alice couldn't resist a challenge for her visions. She loved stretching her gift like this, especially where shopping and surprises were concerned. She eagerly plunged into the silent world of pictures that swirled around inside her head, visiting department store after department store and flipping catalog pages, all without moving a muscle. It took her three days to figure it out.

"Esme!" she pouted, bursting in on me as I was painting that third afternoon. "That's not even a real present!"

"It is to me," I said, opening my arms for her reluctant hug. "You know I've always wanted to bake something with you." She made a face, but she also promised to follow through.

"Hand me the whisk, would you, dear?" I asked her now. She dug through the drawer of mysterious cooking implements, zoning out for a moment, no doubt to peek ahead and see what a whisk even looked like. I donned my favorite apron and tossed another one to her.

"I'll beat the eggs and oil and sugar if you'll peel and grate the zucchini," I offered.

"Gladly," she said, peering with distaste into my bowl. "I will never understand why humans like to scramble up animal embryos. Isn't that... kind of gross?"

"It is when you put it that way," I laughed. "I can't say it appeals to me either, not anymore."

Alice was concentrating, trying to figure out how to peel the zucchini. She was holding the peeler steady and drawing the vegetable back and forth along it instead of the other way around.

"Try the opposite way," I suggested gently. "You hold whatever you're peeling still and draw the peeler downwards, away from you. Then lift it up and start at the top again." She nodded and tried again, sticking her tongue out in concentration. Her pressure wasn't quite right and she ended up peeling away a good half of the zucchini itself, but I adored her effort. I laid three more down for her to do.

"You know I like to bake for various local things now and then," I explained, whisking the oil into the eggs and sugar at superspeed. "Hospital fundraisers, the children's ward, sometimes an event or two at whatever school you all are attending... Good. Now you're going to grate the zucchini right into this mixture." I demonstrated first this time.

"I'm sure they appreciate the gesture," she said, "but you and Carlisle give gobs of money to those things anyway. Wouldn't store-bought cookies or bread be just as good?"

"Heavens, no! They aren't baked with love when those industrial machines do the work. And it makes me feel good, too. It feels like I'm actually participating in a way that feels familiar and human. Baking was a way I showed love to people in my first life, so I kept on doing it in my second, even when I wasn't ready to go out at all. It's a shame I can't enjoy the food myself, but it's still special."

"You used to volunteer at Carlisle's hospitals, didn't you?" Alice asked.

"Now and then, yes. But it's been a long time." I hesitated for a second. "I've been thinking of a new adventure lately—going back to school."

"Really? You would pose as a college student?" She looked doubtful.

"I would be a college student," I laughed. "Why, do you think I look too old? I might need a little help from you and Rosalie..."

That perked her right up. We started chattering about ways we could make me look younger: hairstyles, makeup, styles of clothing and jewelry and shoes and purses, even ways I could talk differently. Alice got so focused on our brainstorming that her grating went faster and faster until her fingertips accidentally smushed the grater's holes in on themselves and she had a big mush of zucchini pulp on the other side. She put everything down and scowled at it.

"I don't think I'm going to be good at this," she said with a sigh, picking at the grater with her fingernails to make the holes right again. "For all I know, I've never done any of it before."

"It's all right," I assured her. I moved on to the dry ingredients in my own bowl. "We're so... perfect at so many things that I find it can be refreshing to not be so good at something, or to at least be so new at something that we can make mistakes. I bought several. Just try again." She took another zucchini, moving more carefully this time. She was concentrating so hard her tongue was sticking out the corner of her mouth again. She was so adorable; I couldn't resist. I snapped a picture before she could change her pose. She didn't even notice. Everyone had grown used to my clicking shutter by now.

Jasper had quietly joined us a moment ago. He was leaning against the kitchen door frame with his arms folded, watching Alice with the most tender, thoughtful smile. He caught my attention behind her back and twisted that naughty little corner-grin of his, the one he got whenever he was about to prank Emmett somehow. He pounced and grabbed her from behind, making her scream.

"I'm sorry!" he laughed, letting her go and dodging the half-grated zucchini she tried to slap him with. "It was just too easy—I could tell you were too immersed in your, uh..."—he gestured toward the mixing bowl vaguely—"for visions, and the stink was strong enough for a good stealth operation... what?" he added, narrowing his eyes.

"Nothing," Alice said sweetly, turning back to stir the putrid green mixture. "Just thinking of how I'll get you back."

"It was worth it," he promised, wrapping his arms around her again, this time for a peck on the cheek.

"Hmm," was all she said. Her eyes were absent, scanning the future. I picked up the camera again, just in case.

"I think you'd better get out while the getting's good," I told Jasper. "Unless you'd like to help out too?"

He held his hands up in surrender. "No thanks. I've already served my time. Emmett and I are going out to whip up some dinner of our own."

"You ready?" Emmett called out, just coming down the stairs. Alice whipped around and flicked a heaping spoonful of zucchini mush, hard, straight at Jasper's face. Jasper ducked just in time for the missile to fly over his head... straight into Emmett's open mouth.

I laughed and took the picture just as Emmett's eyes bulged out in horror. He spewed it all out, and it just happened to time perfectly with when Jasper stood back up, so he got a faceful as well. He swiped furiously at the mess and his mouth, and I got one more picture to commemorate the moment when my newest son tasted human food for the very first time. He looked like he was actually going to vomit, and he sounded like it too. He finally rushed over to the sink and flushed it all out with water, leaving a bright green trail everywhere he stepped. Alice was serenely stirring the batter, humming to herself.

"Was it still worth it?" she asked innocently.

"No," Jasper said, shuddering one last time. "It was not. Real funny, Emmett."

"You're blaming me?!" Emmett practically yelled. He was wiping his mouth out with my brand new kitchen towel. I sighed and took it from him, dropping it in the trash; I had learned the hard way never to put venom in the washing machine.

"I guess not," Jasper sighed, growling playfully at Alice as he passed instead of giving her a goodbye kiss. Emmett relaxed and turned to go, but Jasper flew up behind him and punched him so hard in the gut that a dribble of venom and old blood gushed out of his mouth. Emmett grabbed Jasper and roared and yanked the back of Jasper's shirt over his head before he could struggle out of Emmett's bear-sized grip.

"Take it outside," I warned them. I grabbed another towel and rushed to get the blood and venom before the dining room floor could start dissolving.

"NOW!" I shouted as they tumbled blindly into the sofa, knocking it askew by several feet. It took them a minute, still snarling and struggling to get a grip on each other, but they got out the back patio door without causing any further carnage. I caught the floor lamp as it fell, an inch before it hit the ground.

"Those two, I swear," I said, dropping the towel into the trash with the other one. "And you saw that whole thing, didn't you?"

"Who, me?" Alice said, stirring furiously.

[caelesjjk]

entangled | jjk&kth - teaser

⟶title: entangled

⟶au: marvel au

⟶ rating: 18+

⟶ genre: romance, smut, love triangle

⟶wc: 1.5k for this

⟶banner: by meee, and yes I’m insane and made a new one

⟶warnings: mentions of blood, kissing, a boob grab and an ass grab, but no actual smut for this, Jungkook calls you Data

⟶ summary: Jeon Jungkook is Spider-Man.

He saved your life twice. But he’s also been your sweet lab partner in college for the past two years and now someone who is more than just a friend.

You care about him…maybe even love him. But something tells you that you aren’t quite sure what love even is. How could you when you have feelings for someone else as well?

Kim Taehyung is the handsome stranger you’ve seen around campus and somehow ended up dancing with at Club Onyx. You were upset that Jungkook had stood you up once again and Taehyung made you feel like you were on top of the world.

What you didn’t know that night, is the dark secret Taehyung is trying desperately to hide, but the closer the two of you get the more difficult that becomes.

⟶ authors note: hello darklings. I know a lot of people have been waiting for this fic, and you’ll have wait just a bit more. But in the meantime, I offer this little teaser to hold you over. A little glimpse of spidey kook. First chapter will be posted in just a few weeks!

Also, if you asked to be on the taglist just now that I tried messing with it for a long ass time and got annoyed lol. I may try again for the actual fic.

“What are you doing here anyways?” You shove against his broad chest and feel his arm release your waist. He sighs, following you inside your apartment.

“I know you’re upset I missed the study session…” Jungkook starts to explain, but you twist back around to face him.

“If my friends hadn’t seen you around campus now and then, they would think I made you up, Jungkook. You never show. It makes me look pathetic.” You cross your arms over your chest and wait for the next excuse.

“You aren’t pathetic, Data. I’m just…” Jungkook winces when he reaches for you, a hand moving down to his ribs in pain. “Sorry, it’s healing it’s just slow.”

“What’s healing? What happened to you?” You let the fight go for a moment, closing the space between the two of you and moving his hand out of the way.

Beneath his fingers is a large cut, bloody but half hidden by his suit. It looks angry and inflamed. What could’ve made a cut like this?

“It’s nothing. I’ll heal up in a couple hours.” He pulls your hand away, blood stained on the tips of your fingers.

“It won’t matter how quick you heal if it gets infected. Come in here.” Your hand wraps around his and you pull him into your small bathroom. You steady him against your bathroom vanity and move to grab your first aid kit from the cabinet above your toilet. “Take that off.” You gesture to his Spider-Man suit.

“Yes, ma’am.” Jungkook teases, gingerly working his top half out of the suit. He hisses through his teeth as he peels the suit away from his ribs and lets it hang at his hips.

You are not the universe's strongest soldier.

Your eyes drift over all the dips and curves of muscle. A perfectly sculpted chest and abs you could literally eat off of are scrambling every sense you have in your head. You need to focus. Stay focused on the task at hand and not his ridiculously toned body.

“You okay, Data?” He asks, humor in his voice. That horrid nickname he had given you in your first year as lab partners is feeling more endearing these days. You clear your throat.

“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be fine? Just tending to Spider-Man’s wounds in my extremely tiny bathroom.” You try to laugh but it doesn’t sound genuine.

You take out some bandages and gauze and get to work cleaning him up. But even as you tape down the gauze, you can visibly see the wound getting smaller. Super powers were really something else.

“Data.” Jungkook’s voice brings you back to reality.

“What?” You sigh.

“Please come here.” His hands reach for your hips and you give in, letting him pull you until you’re flush against him, suddenly nose to nose. “That’s better.”

“I’m angry with you.” You whisper, heart pumping a bit faster in the close proximity.

“I know that you are. I’m really sorry…I swear I wanted to be there.” You look down to see him slip his gloves off his hands and sit them on the countertop before they’re coming up to cup your face.

“Then what happened? You need to tell me.” Your hands wrap around his wrists.

“There’s something out there, Data. A…monster that we can’t figure out. He’s strong…and fast. Nothing I’ve ever seen before.” His thumbs brush the corners of your mouth.

“What does it want?”

“It keeps breaking into the Lab across the River. It’s looking for something. But no one at the lab is being very forthcoming with information.” His forehead presses to yours, “but Mr. Kim is working on that part.”

Seokjin Kim, also known as Ironman. He was a mentor and a good friend to Jungkook. He had helped Jungkook navigate the new world of being a superhero and also gave him a job to help him pay for school.

“Hasn’t Mr. Kim told you to call him Jin over and over?” You tease, hands coming up to rest against his chest. Jungkook laughs quietly, pulling you closer.

“He has. Guess it just slipped out.” His hands move down to palm your ass.

“What exactly do you think you’re doing?” You raise an eyebrow in question of his actions.

“Just feels like I haven’t touched you in so long.” His warm mouth finds your throat and he presses kisses to the skin.

“Two days is a long time?”

“It is when it comes to you. Thinking about how much I want you gets so distracting.” He nuzzles into the crook of your neck making you giggle.

“So what I did for you two days ago wasn’t enough?” You let your hands slither down from his chest and over the planes of his stomach.

“Never enough.” His nose skims over your jaw until you’re back face to face and his lips are devouring yours. “I’d like to pay you back.”

“How?” You moan when you’re cut off by his tongue sliding into your mouth.

“Let me show you?” Jungkook pulls away from the kiss, taking your hand and leading you out of the bathroom.

Thinking he means to lead you to your bed, you start to pull him towards it but he seems to have other ideas, walking you back out onto the balcony. He releases your hand momentarily to slide his suit back up over his shoulders.

“What are you going to show me out here, Jungkook?” You start to feel suspicious.

“Do you trust me?” He jumps up onto your railing with ease, still holding your hand in his.

“Not if it involves you swinging me around off the side of buildings.” You start to pull your hand out of his, but his web shooter from the other wrist shoots a web at your torso, using his inhuman strength to pull you up onto the railing into his arms.

“I would never let you fall. Never. Just close your eyes for a few minutes. I promise it’ll be worth it, Data.” He touches your cheek gently, and even though you want to throw up every time he does this, you close your eyes and wrap your arms as tightly as possible around his neck and legs around his waist. “Ready?” He whispers in your ear, one strong arm wrapping around your back.

You don’t verbally answer, just nod once before burying your face into his neck.

And then the ground is no longer beneath your feet and the sickening feeling of free falling is very apparent. You try to breathe, squeezing yourself around Jungkook as you listen to the whooshing sound of his web shooters discharge and swing you between the tallest buildings in the city.

“You’re doing amazing.” Jungkook kisses your cheek, “just another minute.”

You keep your eyes squeezed shut until the curiosity becomes too overwhelming, making you dare to open your eyes just the slightest bit. You see the sun completely setting on the horizon, orange and purple hues slowly disappearing beneath the river. As long as you don’t think about how high up you are, it really is beautiful up here.

Jungkook shoots a web straight up into the air, letting it connect to the side of one of the tallest buildings, slowly pulling the two of you up until he’s reached the highest ledge, tapping your thighs so you know it’s safe to put your feet down.

“Why are we up here, Jungkook? You know the heights..” he kisses you before you can finish the sentence.

“Can we try something?” He smiles, and it’s infuriating. You’re too weak for this spidey boy. You sigh with exasperation.

“I’m already very wary of saying yes.” You look away from the ledge towards the top of the building.

“Let me make you feel good…up here.” His cheeks heat a little when he asks.

“Is this some kind of weird adrenaline thing? Why would you want that?” Your voice cracks and you sputter, disbelief heavy in your tone.

“I think it’ll be intense…feel so good.” His lips move down and his teeth nip at your jaw.

“It’s insane…” you melt into his touch and the way his mouth sucks at your neck.

“If you don’t like it, I’ll take you home. And I’ll get you naked in your bed instead.” He pulls your shirt over your head, fully knowing you’re about to give in.

“Bed sounds so good right now…”

“Please, Data…just try it.” He tosses your shirt to the side, cupping your breasts and kissing the tops of them.

“What do I have to do?” You feel too good to let the fear ruin the way he’s making you feel.

“Lie back on the ledge, with your arms above your head and your wrists crossed.”

You let him lead you down onto the ledge, every nerve in your body is hot and on the edge. Jungkook makes sure that you’re settled before he stands back up straight, looking down at you while you slowly move your arms above your head the way he asked.

“You’re perfect, Data.” Jungkook stares at you a moment longer before he aims his web shooter and traps your wrists together against the concrete ledge beneath you.

[taestefully-in-luv]

Always You | JJK (Five)

Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?

Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader, slight Taehyung x Reader

Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama

Word Count: 12.1k

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (?) sad oc, mentions of sex, kind of over the clothes action, drama, heated dance session lol, slight memory of sex, hair pulling, back scratching, mention of boner, second chances (?)

Notes: Okay, first of all THAT 1st TEASER PIC!!! DID WE SEE THAT? *chefs kiss*. Anyway thanks for comments you guys leave I really love reading them!!! Remember to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:) have a great week everyone!

Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch

© taestefully-in-luv

Previous --- Next

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May

Gloomy: The dictionary may describe it as hopeless and despairing but really it should just be a picture of your sad, sad face.

1 month…yes, one whole month has passed since you last spoke to Jungkook. No text, no calls, no random show ups, nothing. Gloom. Gloom. Gloom. Graduation came and gone so quickly…you walked the stage with your friends minus two but honestly you can hardly remember the event. You tried your hardest to be as excited as everyone else but the feeling of gloom stayed with you.

By the end of the month you finally started accepting he isn’t coming back and right around that time you actually heard from him—Jungkook that is. He sent you a pathetic text that he’s moving out and will be by to retrieve his things. More gloom.

The next couple weeks after that are a blur, you recall the sound of movers throughout your apartment. You didn’t have the courage to speak to him…you didn’t have the courage to even leave your room if you didn’t have to. You were so wrapped up in everything you didn’t even consider that fact that you will have to find a new roommate to cover the other half of the rent.

Every day just dragged on, every day a repeat of the last. Wake up, drown in black coffee, scroll mindlessly through your phone and work your full time job. You called in sick too many days already so you have to go or you’re at risk at getting fired. The same day, every day. The same gloomy fucking day.

Jimin tried to call or text every day to make sure you were like, alive. He apologized over and over for not telling you as soon as he found out about the Taehyung situation but he felt that if Taehyung was going to tell you then it is best it comes from him and not Jimin. You can understand that. He also frequently would show up at your apartment to surprise you but you rarely let him in. You did feel bad though, he’s just trying to be there for you.

Jimin 6:04pm

Please let me in?

Jimin 6:05pm

Well…I have some take out for you babe, ill leave it on the doorstep.

Jimin 6:05pm

Call me sometime ok? Love you

Guilt would consume your body but you just couldn’t deal with human contact right now.

June

Around month 2 you finally felt okay to see people again—your close people that is—aka Jimin was finally allowed in, he made you take a hot bath while he cleaned up for you and made you a proper meal. The amount of instant ramen containers lying around the place was by far one of the grossest things he’s seen. The shit that was growing…he shudders just thinking about it.

He would come over every day after work in the evenings. He left day time babysitting to Trina.

“Girl…all this over a boy?” she would constantly say.

You also tried applying for job after job, but the postgraduation life is harder than you thought…at least for you. Jimin landed a job as a kids choreographer, Trina starts up at one of the local elementary schools as a kindergartner teacher and you? You’re still working at the bakery down the street. You applied for many entry level positions in the marketing field but failed miserably in interviews…which only further discouraged you and worsened your mood.

It was also around this time you decided to finally delete Jungkook off all social media and block his number. You refuse to hear from him at this point…not that he was reaching out or anything. You wonder what he’s up to postgraduation? No, you don’t want to know or care. You considered hanging up a picture of his face on your wall so you could throw darts at it but you decided that was maybe on the crazy side. Taehyung sends you weekly texts, asking about how your day/week is going. He updates you on his life as well, apparently he got the curator assistant position at the museum that he wanted. You still feel hurt over everything but you are happy for him. It’s funny, you feel so betrayed over that but Jungkook is the cause of your gloom.

Every day just drags on, you feel heavy everywhere you go. Even when you’re just at home in bed.

By the end of the month your friends somehow convinced you to go on a date—a horrible date at that.

He was awkward as hell, a bad kisser and would lightly…tap your ass in attempt to be sexy. It was a disaster, you don’t even remember what the two of you even talked about at dinner. You just remember his tongue being horribly shoved down your throat and his weird ass tapping habit.

July

Then month 3 finally came around. A month where the weeks went by breathing became just a bit easier. Yes, any and everything still reminded you of Jungkook but it didn’t hurt as terribly as the previous months. By the end of the month you even agreed to your first real social outing. You are hesitant, but you agreed…

“I don’t know guys…a birthday party? We like, don’t even know the girl?” you frown, nibbling on the flesh of your bottom lip.

You are sitting in the middle of your bedroom floor, clothes piling all around you as you try to decide on what to wear.

“You need to get out babe…plus it’s a friend of a friend, so it’s cool.” Jimin says holding up a rose colored crop top, motioning for you to nod yes or no to his suggestion. You cock your head to the side, deciding what pants to go with it.

“I have to say I agree with Jimin, y/n.” your new roommate Holly chips in, “Since I’ve moved in I don’t think I’ve seen you go out even once.”

“Also a party is the best place to find some easy dick.” Of course that’s what Trina has to offer.

“Yes to the crop top Jimin.” You point your head towards the shirt, “Okay don’t have to call me out like that Holly.” You glare at your roomie, “And Trina, we both know I ain’t ready for no type of dick.”

“So we’re looking for some pussy tonight?” Trina smirks, “Nice.”

You rolls your eyes, a chuckle escaping your lips, “Shut up.” you throw a pair of shorts at her face.

“But seriously y/n…Maybe Trina is on to something…” Jimin sits down next to you, crossing his legs in front of him, “Maybe this is a good chance to like—”

“If you say move on I will literally kill you.” You cut in, “There’s nothing to move on from!” you throw your hands up dramatically. “Taehyung used me, Jungkook wants nothing to do with me. And—”

“Then why aren’t you ready for any type of dick?” Holly puts in her 2 fucking cents.

“Because I don’t want to be associated with any boys! Jimin is the exception.”

“Somehow I don’t feel flattered by that…” Jimin puts a hand on your shoulder.

“When’s the last time you got off?” Trina abruptly asks. You turn your head in shock at her shamelessness.

“Trina!”

“Answer her, I’m curious too.” Jimin squints at you trying not to laugh.

“It’s…” your eyes slide to the side, “It’s been a while.”

Trina shakes her in disapproval, “Damn girl, really? My fingers constantly playing DJ, you know what I’m sayin?” Trina goes in for a fist bump but you just push her hand away.

“You’re gross.” You laugh out loud, and it sounds like music to everyone’s ears.

“I’m just real babey.” She flicks her hair back with a proud smile on her face.

Having these 3 around has no doubt helped you deal with the loss you feel. You feel like you are still mourning the dead. How’s Jungkook even doing? You’re too afraid to ask Jimin. Too afraid that he’s doing amazing without you. He must of realized how much better off he is without you around and that makes you feel small.

“Fine…” you mutter under your breath…Jimin snaps his head to look at you, his sly smile growing as he watches you fiddle with a short mini skirt.

“Fine what?” Trina asks with a smirk.

“Let’s find me some dick tonight.”

“Hell fucking yeah.” Jimin claps his hands together, “Tonight is about you!”

“y/n makes her debut tonight! She’s hot, she’s single and she is ready to mingle!”

You can’t help but giggle, your hands bunching up the material of the mini skirt as you look down at it, making your decision.

“Let me get ready and we can get this night started!” you rush to your feet, all the sudden feeling excited for tonight. You are going to actually do your hair and your makeup—you even shaved. You are definitely breathing easier tonight and you have to take advantage of that!

“Let’s do shots as we wait girlies,” Holly shows a bottle of rum she had hiding behind her back, shaking it in excitement.

“Naughty girl.” Jimin winks, standing to his feet, heading towards the kitchen to grab some shot glasses.

You get ready quickly, but taking your time where it counts. You give yourself a once over in the mirror and you have to say you are impressed. Your black jean mini skirt sits right below your ass, while your tits pop in this rose crop top. You wear short heels, and simple jewelry with just the right amount of makeup that makes your features stand out, and you have to say you would kiss yourself if you could—you look fucking good.

“woooooo” Jimin and Trina whistle out at the same time as they walk back in your bedroom.

“I’d fuck.” Jimin says plainly.

“Same as fuck.” Trina says bluntly as she swallows down a shot.

“Yeah you look pretty y/n!” Holly smiles, not really on the same level of honestly as your other two friends.

You burst into giggles, throwing your head back in approval. “Thanks guys…..Lets fucking do this.” You walk towards Trina and grab her shot glass, and you take the bottle from Holly, pouring yourself a shot.

“Ready to fucking mingle.” You gulp down the rum, the burn only encouraging you, the warmth stinging your entire chest and you couldn’t feel more content.

This house was one of the bigger ones, it was full of people and more people and like, more people. You managed to swallow down 3 or 4 shots back at your apartment and the alcohol is definitely working its magic on you, the world just a little nicer.

The amount of people doesn’t even bother you like it usually would, instead you find yourself barging through the front door and making your way to the dance floor with your 3 friends trialing behind you.

The heat of the living room is already intoxicating you, the amount of bodies rolling and grinding makes you feel loose and free. Before you know it Jimin is pushing a drink into your hands and you hug him gratefully as you begin chugging it back.

“Woah slow down, we have all night—actually fuck it, I like your spirit tonight!” he chuckles lightly, his hands going to your waist, rocking you to the beat of the blaring music. Trina and Holly disappear into the kitchen to grab more drinks while you and Jimin dance to whatever b…t…ah, forget it, you forgot the band’s name.

“Are you having fun?” Jimin slurs out, his eyes barely visible as he laughs at nothing.

“So much fun!” you yell out over the music then you lean down into his ear and whisper, “Thanks so much Jiminie…I know I was a little difficult…”

“A little?” he teases.

Jimin’s eyes travel behind you before they are widening. You notice, of course. You are about to turn your head to take a look at whatever he is seeing when his snaps back to you in panic, his troubled smile growing.

“Let’s go find Trina and Holly, yeah?” he tries to usher you toward the kitchen and you oblige. Too drunk and feeling too good that his odd behavior goes ignored by you.

“Kay!” you smile, hooking your arm with his. “Letsa go!” you say like you’re fucking Mario.

The two of you walk to the kitchen, finding Trina and Holly playing a game of beer pong with two random guys.

“Hello my bitches!” Trina hollers over the thumping bass, as she scores a cup of pong, her other hand on Hollys lower back.

“Wait, gotta use the bathroom, be right back!” you slur into Jimin’s ear, he just nods distractedly as he watches the game, laughter erupting his body for probably no drunken reason.

You walk back into the living room and start heading towards the other side where the bathroom is. The journey to the bathroom is fun, you accidently bump into a lot of people but they don’t seem to mind as they will just drunkenly smile at you and you would smile back in your own drunken daze. You skim the room with a dopey smile on your face, just admiring the crowd. You are shocked with yourself…you missed people and you cannot believe it. You continue to observe when your eyes land on tattooed hands. The hands are grabbing a handful of ass on the dance floor. You know these hands. Your eyes travel from his hands to his strong arms to his face…it is hiding in the nook of some girls neck and you feel like someone knocked the wind out of you. Jungkook.

He is kissing on some girl, no doubt leaving bruises behind from his attack on her neck. His hands cupping this girls ass so tightly, he guides her hips into his. You watch as she throws her head back in pleasure and you see him smirk. All his signature moves. You are left speechless. What could you even say? Why does this hurt? Why does this make you feel fucking sick? Why does it feel like you aren’t supposed to be witnessing this? Well, you know why but god, why?!

“y/n!!” It’s Jimin, jogging up behind you, “Fuck, I was trying to avoid you seeing this…” he admit softly, “I swear I didn’t think he was going to be here tonight…he didn’t seem that interested when I asked him about it…”

“It’s fine Jimin…” you mumble.

“Does it feel weird? Seeing him with this girl…?” Jimin is obviously trying to get you to admit something right now but you are not in the right head space to even give it a second thought.

“Why should it? Plus I’m used to this…she’s just some random girl for one night.” You twirl the ends of your hair between your fingers.

“Oh babe…” Jimin glances down at the ground, “This girl…she…he’s brought her to every party for the last month…” Jimin sounds as sorry as you feel.

The same girl? That’s impossible, you scoff. There’s no way Jungkook is actually seeing someone. But that doesn’t stop your stomach from twisting and turning and making you feel fucking sick.

“What do you mean?” you finally slur out, leaning your frame on Jimin.

“He brings her and they leave together too…” Jimin holds on to you, “I haven’t really asked him about her though.”

“Whatever. Fuck him, right? I won’t let this ruin my night.” You smile coyly, draping your arms around your friend. “Bathroom please.” You pout theatrically, pointing your head towards the bathroom.

“Okay let’s get you peeing in peace.” Jimin laughs, guiding you towards the door.

Once at the door, you knock a couple times to find that it is empty, “I’ll wait for you out here.” Jimin assures you.

Once inside the small room, you bunch up your skirt and pull down your panties, squatting on the toilet. You sigh in relief as you pee, but the relief you feel in your body stops when you recall the way Jungkook held and kissed this random but not so random girl.

Why should it bother you? It’s about time Jungkook got serious! But why did he have to dump you to achieve that? And why did It have to be with someone el…

You reach for the toilet paper, ripping it after a few sheets and wipe yourself as you drunkenly sing a tune. So what? You can easily replace Jungkook too!

You stand up, pulling your panties up and your skirt down and take a long good look in the mirror. Your hair is still intact, your makeup is only a little smeared—quick fix, and your tits are still poppin’. This night is just beginning, you decide. A whole new wave of confidence begins washing over you.

“Ready!” You pounce on Jimin’s back, he stumbles forward while laughing wholeheartedly.

“Should we look for Trina and Holly again? They’re probably still playing beer pong!”

“Sure.” You smile, walking hand in hand with Jimin as you make your way back to the kitchen.

Hours pass and you are now outside on the back porch piss drunk with your 3 friends and a couple new friends. Nick and his pal that you can’t remember the name of—but you remember Nick. He’s really tall and has nice muscles covering his body, his light hair is messy and looks like you would have fun pulling it.

“And that’s why I think aliens are already here bro, like they are probably here at this fucking party bro.” No name friend finishes his point. Nick holds in his chuckle as his drunk friend rambles.

“Totally bro.” Then his eyes land on you. Fuck, were you staring? Oh well, it’s best to get to the point. You two have been making eyes at each other all night and it’s time to make the next move.

“Hey Nick, wanna grab a drink with me in the kitchen?” you inquire with a sly smile.

Jimin’s eyes widen before he’s smirking “Don’t be silly, wrap that willy.”

Trina and Holly laugh at Jimin’s words while you turn fucking red with embarrassment.

“Sorry about him…” You excuse Jimin, but you continue to smile slyly.

Nick grins with all his teeth as he takes your hand and leads you back inside the house. His hand is much larger than yours and you are already imagining what his beefy fingers will do to your vagina. God, what’s his dick like???

You enter the kitchen and you and him walk towards the cooler full of beers, he lets you stand to the side as he goes to grab them.

“Nick!!!!” you hear a familiar voice and you wince. Jungkook stands next to the cooler, his hand wrapped around the girls hand, but he briefly lets go of it to dap up your fuck for the night.

“What’s up bro!” Nick returns the handshake, a wide smile on his face.

They know each other?

“I thought you said you weren’t coming tonight?” Jungkook’s hand goes back to holding on to the girl.

“I wasn’t going to but,” he nods towards you, “Glad I did.” He winks. Jungkook’s eyes follow Nicks nod and when he sees you stand there awkwardly he goes completely pale. Your eyes meet uncomfortably, Jungkook let’s go of the girls hand without a second thought.

“y/n?” he questions with a pained expression.

“You know her?” Nick asks, totally out of the loop.

You shift from one foot to the other, not really sure what to do or say. So you settle for his name. “Jungkook.” It feels foreign on your tongue. Like if you said it 3 times in a mirror a sinister ghost would come to murder you.

Jungkook opens his mouth then closes it then opens it then closes it again.

“Baaaaabe,” the girl next to him whines, “let’s get out of here already.” She says, not even acknowledging your existence.

Jungkook shamelessly eyes you up and down, his shock is very evident as he looks at you.

You can’t help but smile a little, knowing you look damn good.

“Let’s go too, Nick.” You saunter to his side, grabbing a hold of his bicep.

That’s when Jungkook knocks out of daze, his brows crease as he looks between the two of you.

“Wait—you and Nick?” he asks, completely amused.

“Is that a problem?”

“Nope.” Jungkook looks fucking smug as he smiles, his hand going to grab the girls hand again. “See you later?” he asks you. You of all people! “Uh? Probably not?”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that.” Jungkook winks, turning around to leave as he leads his girl out.

Nick just continues to smile, completely oblivious, “So cool that we all know each other!” he grips on to your waist.

“Wait, how do you know Jungkook?”

“We—”

“Wait, it honestly doesn’t matter. Let’s just get out of here.”

“My place?” Nick breathes into your ear, he pushes your hips into his crotch so you can feel his half hard cock.

“Why are you already getting hard?” you tease, leaning up to kiss his neck.

“Honestly, I can’t stop staring at your tits. And I am imagining all the things I want to do to them.” He confesses hotly.

The uber ride to his place is short, only 10 minutes and it goes by quickly as you two have one another’s tongues down each others throats. His hands traveling all around your body, he even manages to slip his fingers past your panties to feel how wet you are.

“Fuck I can’t wait to get you inside…” his rapid breaths fan across your face as you nibble on his neck.

“Gonna fuck me?” you whisper quietly, not trying to get heard by the Uber driver, but you could also hardly care if he hears you or not, he gets 5 stars.

“Want you to ride me.” He palms his cock through his pants as he imagines you bouncing on his cock for him.

“If you deserve it like a good boy.” You replace his hand with your own, rubbing him ferociously over his jeans. You haven’t felt dick in months and the feeling is driving you absolutely wild, you haven’t felt this needy in a long time.

The Uber comes to a stop, parking in front of an apartment building. He lets the two of you know you reached your destination. You and Nick giggle as you thank him and stumble out of the car as you follow him to his apartment. He would stop every few seconds to plant kisses on your lips and grab your ass with a tight squeeze. He groans and rolls his eyes back as he explores your body.

“Wait til we’re inside,” you breathe out, your voice silky as hell.

Finally, after a short, kiss filled elevator ride later you arrive at his front door. His lips never leaving yours as he pulls out his keys, fumbling with them until he finds the right one.

He pulls away for a second to unlock the door and desperately pushes it open to let the two of you inside. Your lips are already back on his as you two trip into the entry way of the apartment, you walk him backwards, until his back is against a wall.

The apartment is dark besides the living room TV, you take a second to pull back and admire Nick’s fucked out expression, the blue glow of the TV making everything feel surreal.

You dive back in to kiss him, he prods his tongue into your mouth, swirling it around with yours making you moan into his mouth.

“Hi guys!”

Your eyes shoot open, mouth still attached to Nicks. You push your head back, disconnecting from Nick and yank your head to the left where you see a wild Jungkook sitting on the living room sofa, his mouth full of the cereal he is eating. He is wearing the most shit eating grin you have ever seen on him.

“Jungkook?! What the fuck?” You spit out, totally fucking shocked. Like, obviously.

“Hey man…” Nick breathes out heavily, trying to speak properly, “I thought you would be at Vanessa’s tonight?”

“Nah,” Jungkook smiles, “Dropped her off and came home.”

HOME?

“H-Home?” You look between the two guys, what the fuck does he mean by that. This is Nicks place, right?

“Oh you didn’t know?” Jungkook nods his head toward Nick, “Nick here is my beloved roommate.”

“What the fuck…” you mutter under your breath, trying to understand the mother fucking situation. Were you about to fuck Jungkook’s roommate? Are you still going to is the real question?

“Wait, how do you two even know each other?” Nick starts to look antsy, “Don’t tell me she’s one of the girls you’ve fucked…come on bro, leave some for the rest of us.” He chuckles somewhat bitterly.

“No!” you’re quick to say. You begin smoothing out your skirt, then your hair. “We just…”

“y/n is my bestie!” Jungkook grins, putting the cereal down and standing up. He walks forward until he is making a triangle with you and Nick.

“Was.” You spit out harshly, crossing your arms across your chest. Nick just stands there confused as hell, looking between the two of you.

“Anyway, I should get going.” You turn your body to Nick, a look of apology on your face.

“What? We can just go to my room?” he slurs, tugging on his pants uncomfortably, his boner still apparent.

“Sorry, no longer in the mood.”

You pull out your phone to order an Uber when Jungkook takes your phone from you.

“I’m not drunk, I can drive you.” He offers. You push your head back in disbelief, how does Jungkook have the AUDACITY to offer that to you?

“Why the fuck would I want that?”

“So we can…” His eyes slide over to the ever growing confused Nick, “Talk.”

You haven’t spoken to Jungkook in 3 months and today is finally the day you are able to breathe a little easier and he just has to barge back in.

“Like I said,” You snatch your phone back from him, “Why the fuck would I want that?”

Nick shifts around uncomfortably, his eyes darting from you to Jungkook.

“Well, I am gonna head to my room…uh, bye y/n…it was nice meeting you…I guess…”

You and Jungkook both turn your heads toward Nick at the same time, eyes shooting daggers at him.

“Yeah, bye.” Jungkook dismisses his roommate, his jaw clenching.

“Nice to meet you too…”

Nick walks backward until his back meets his bedroom room, he looks at the two of you one last time before turning around to disappear into his room.

“I said, let me drive you home.”

“And I said, why the fuck would I want that?”

“y/n don’t choose now to be difficult.” Jungkook takes a step closer to you, his hands running through his dark, messy hair. His eyes shut in frustration, “I just want to talk to you.”

“And I don’t want to talk to you.” You take a step back, “Plus, how would your girlfriend feel if you took me home?”

Jungkook’s eyes narrow, his mouth setting in a firm line.

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

“Could of fooled me and like, everyone else.” You scoff.

Jungkook bites down on his bottom lip, not knowing what to say. While she’s not his girlfriend she’s also not not his girlfriend. It’s complicated.

“Can I please, just please, can I take you home?”

“No, Jungkook. The fucking audacity,” you scoff again, “You haven’t spoken to me in 3 months,” your voice fucking cracks and you feel like dying. “Don’t start now.”

“y/n…” he runs another frustrated hand down his tired face, “I didn’t mean for it to go this long…” “I don’t fucking care, Jungkook.”

You feel your chest begin to burn, and your eyes begin to gloss over but you won’t cry. You won’t give him the satisfaction.

“I want nothing to do with you.”

You stare at the phone in your hands as you begin ordering your Uber when he yanks it from your hands once again, he hides the phone in his back pocket and you snarl.

“What the hell Jeon?”

“I said I am driving you home so we can talk so that’s what we are gonna fucking do, okay?” he grabs your hand and begins walking you towards the front door. There’s something about Jungkook...you decide to listen. You watch silently as he puts on his shoes and grabs his wallet and keys.

“Okay…” you finally answer, your voice timid.

He said you guys are going to talk but the car ride has been mostly silent save the low radio playing in the background. Maybe it’s better this way, you think. You aren’t sober, that’s for sure but you also don’t think you are drunk enough to handle this properly. You decide maybe that’s also for the best.

“You sir, are a fucking asshole.” You speak up, your fingers playing with the zipper of your purse. The car smells like it always does, his fresh laundry car freshener and you get sucked into a million memories linked with this scent.

“I know.” Jungkook eyes you from the driver seat, you shiver from the running AC and so he turns it down, “There’s a blanket in the back if you want to grab it.”

“No thanks, don’t know where that’s been.”

“It’s clean, I promise.”

Your eyes go wide as you recall his last promise to you…”Just a few days. I promise.”

“Yeah, I don’t actually believe in your promises anymore.” You continue to pick at the zipper of your purse, your eyes never leaving the zig and zag of the material.

“I needed space y/n, fucking sue me.” He groans out, his fingers gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“Oh I wish I could.” You snap back.

You feel your chest burn and tighten again, your eyes slightly watering. You have to force them shut to keep from any tears growing.

“I called and texted you every day.” You whisper, his grip getting tighter on the steering wheel.

“I gave you a few days Jungkook. But I never heard from you until 11 at night one night telling me you are fucking moving out.”

“I know, that was…fucked up, I admit. But I had to do what I had to do and I just wish you would let me explain that—”

“No.” you cut him off, “You don’t deserve to explain anything.”

“You mean so much to me y/n…”

“Don’t.”

Jungkook pulls over on the side of the road, turning off the ignition.

“What are you doing?” you sputter out.

He clicks his seatbelt off his body and turns to face you, “Getting comfortable.”

“Why?”

“Will you look at me?” Jungkook tilts his head towards you, “Will you please look at me?”

“No.” you stay facing forward, your hands folded in your lap.

“y/n…please.” His voice sounds strained and you almost feel bad. Almost, but not quite.

You don’t need this…you don’t need him. Ouch, you feel pain in your chest as you think that…oh, the lies you tell yourself.

“Say what you need to say Jungkook, so you can take me home.” Your face stays neutral.

Jungkook sighs out, feeling almost defeated, but not quite.

“I…I am so sorry.” He finally says.

“About what?”

“Everything y/n.” his voice cracks and somehow you feel satisfied.

“You’ll have to be more specific if you ever want my acceptance”

“I know…the first thing I am sorry for is not telling you about Taehyung. That was…that was wrong of me—”

“No shit, but go on.” Your voice stays steady as you speak.

“I was worried about other shit, I was selfish and it’s taking me a long time to forgive myself…but I’ve thought a lot about it these last few months and—and…”

“Oh? You’re worried about you forgiving yourself? Shouldn’t you be a little more concerned about I don’t know, me?”

Jungkook frowns at your words, because well, you’re right. And he’s getting to that part but you keep interrupting him. But he lets you.

“Yes. I am most worried about you, of course.” He breathes out. “You have no idea what these 3 months without you have felt like…”

“Really Jungkook? If anyone knows its fucking me. I went 3 months without you too. You left me!” you start to lose your composure as you speak, your hands gripping on to your poor purse. “When I was going through a really hard time you straight up left me.” You whisper.

“Please believe me…I had my reasons. It was truly for the best y/n.”

“For the best?” you scoff. “You’re such an asshole.”

Jungkook winces at your words, he knows you mean them and that hurts him even more.

“Can you just trust me?” Jungkook blurts out.

Huh? You shake your head, disappointed he would say something so …well, ridiculous.

“Just stop, Jungkook.” You hesitantly roll your eyes, still shaking your head.

Jungkook licks his lips over and over, trying to figure out his next words.

“I really really,” he begins to lose it, his eyes darting all around the car. “just need you to trust me.” He blinks repeatedly, his eyes not focusing on anything in particular.

You, of course, do not believe your ears. Trust him? How could you possibly trust him?

“I just really…I really had my reasons y/n. And I’m sorry, but I just need you to just trust me, that I had my reasons and that I do care about you.” His voice is shaky and you’re uncertain how to take this information.

“I’m confused…” you begin, you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You want me to trust you? Even after you left me? Even after I ‘threw myself’ at you?!”

“You weren’t in the right head space y/n…you were vulnerable and…and you didn’t actually want me. You just were feeling used and rejected and needed something to make you feel wanted. To feel better. You wanted to use me for that and I couldn’t let you. But how much could I handle? You liked one of my friends, dated him…sort of, even slept with him and I had to be your shoulder to cry on when,” his breathing picks up heavily as he tries to speak, “it doesn’t matter.” He grits out.

You sit there…speechless. He wasn’t wrong, was he? You were feeling lost and rejected and used and you just wanted something or someone to feel better and who better than your best friend? But it’s also his fault you needed things to work out with Taehyung in the first place!

“Jungkook—”

“I’m not done.” He breathes out, his hot breath reaching your skin.

“I needed some space to think. But I realized I couldn’t properly think things through if I saw you every day, so yeah, I moved out. I’m sorry…” He runs a hand through his hair, a light chuckle makes it way past his lips “Then I met Vanessa.”

“I don’t want to talk about your little girlfriend.” You turn to face forward in your seat, your eyes glancing at the stop sign ahead.

“I told you, she’s not my girlfriend. But it is complicated.”

You continue to look straight ahead, your heart racing in your chest. The subject of “Vanessa” making you feel anxious.

“Complicated how?” you gulp.

“Don’t worry about it.” He laughs to himself, you turn your head to look at him.

“Are you serious, Jungkook?”

“We fuck y/n.”

“But it’s more than that right?”

“Yeah…” Jungkook bites down on his lip.

You look at him bewildered.

“Do you like her? Love her?”

You grip your purse in your lap, waiting for his answer. How would you feel if he answers yes? Are you brave enough to endure that answer? And if he says no? should you be happy? Should you feel relieved?

“No.” he closes his eyes, he folds his hands in front of him. “It’s complicated.”

You sign in relief—oh. Relief is the emotion you are feeling. Why? Why should it matter?

“Why are you telling me all of this?” you whisper.

“I want to be friends again, y/n.” he says softly, his eyes searching yours.

This is madness, how the hell could you save this friendship? Your face scrunches up and the first couple of tears slide down your cheeks, you shake your head as they continue to fall.

“You don’t know how this makes me feel…” you cry out. “I don’t even know how it makes me feel.”

You miss him, so fucking much and he’s right here offering himself to you. But you ‘re so hurt.

“y/n…I know I hurt you. But you gotta believe me when I say it is the hardest thing I have had to do…you understand that right? I had to do it…you understand right?” he begs.

“You were so quick to abandon me, Jungkook.” You drop your head into your hands, the tears uncontrollable now.

“I…” Jungkook begins to panic, his own eyes glossing over. “Fuck, I’m so sorry. Please y/n…I can make it up to you.”

“Things would never be the same, you get that right?” you bawl into your lap, your words coming out broken.

“Please baby, I just need you in my life again…” Jungkook admits, his own words choppy. He reaches his hand to touch you, to his surprise you don’t flinch. His hand cups the back of your head and he begins to massage it softly.

“I have missed you so much and nothing I mean nothing can replace you.” He hesitates to continue, “trust me…I have tried.”

You sob into your hands harder, the weight of his words crushing you.

“I’m sorry Jungkook but I…I don’t believe you.”

Jungkook’s eyes widen as he absorbs your words, his mouth falls open in shock. Don’t believe him?

“What—what do you mean? What are you saying?” his panic filled voice makes your stomach churn.

“I reject your offer. Now please take me home.” You lift your head and stare straight ahead. “I’m serious.”

Jungkook face twists into a bewildered expression, he doesn’t believe his ears. You…reject him?

“Wait—”

“I said take me home now.” This time you snap your face in his direction, the cold look in your eyes piercing his very soul.

“Okay.”

Hopeless: the dictionary describes it as without hope ; despairing. But in reality, it’s just a picture of Jungkook’s poor, poor face.

Jungkook parks in his designated spot in the lot of his apartment complex, he reverses in because why the hell not. So extra. His drive home was silent… not even the radio on a low volume keeping him company, just complete silence. He turns the car off but doesn’t make a move to get out, he just continues to sit here in his car and sigh out dramatically every 5 seconds.

He’s so confused and lost on what to do. He bangs his head against the steering wheel a few times just for the hell of it, he just…he didn’t think you would reject him. But honestly? Can he blame you? All he’s done lately is be selfish and mess up over and over again. But he wishes you could just trust him but he also wishes he could just tell you the truth. Maybe then you could understand his position and you wouldn’t be mad at him anymore. But he has to wait.

Jungkook’s head is still banging against the steering wheel when more thoughts of you bombard his mind. His breathing picks up and he starts to sniffle, he doesn’t want to cry but you just…you don’t want anything to do with him. He balls his hands into fists and hit the steering wheel over and over causing the horn to go off a few times but he doesn’t care he’s so upset, he just….

When Jungkook saw you tonight for the first time in 3 months he swears his heart actually stopped. He swears it raced so quickly that it just stopped. He let go of Vanessa’s hand so quickly because he wanted to rush to you and hug you close, he wanted to just feel you. Not having touched your skin for the last 3 months…he doesn’t want to imagine even another day.

A few tears slip past his closed lids, he chuckles darkly as he recalls you and Nick. He thought, wow, the universe is cruel and also hilarious. His fucking roommate? He shakes his head, laughing again but his lips remain downward. He feels so fucking helpless right now. But he deserves this, he deserves to feel this pain. He did this to himself and he’s fully aware of that.

Jungkook thinks of your face, he thinks of your smile, he thinks of your eyes and he cries harder, his tears landing on the steering wheel and sliding down landing on to his lap. Yes, he feels like all hope is lost but he knows he cannot give up. He will win you over again one day. He lifts his head and wipes his tear streaked cheeks with the back of his hand and breathes out steadily.

“y/n…” he whispers to himself. Your name leaves his mouth in frustration. He won’t give up. He can’t.

~~~~

“And they were roommates?!” Jimin shouts, a banana half sticking out of his mouth, Trina gasps and whispers “Oh my god they were roommates.”

“Yeah, it was a total shit show.” You bang your head against your breakfast table. Holly rubs your back as she sits next to you.

“Then what happened?” she pries further.

“Yeah what the hell happened y/n!” Jimin yells out.

“He asked to be friends again…and I totally rejected him. Maybe I was too harsh? He was so sad guys…it makes me think…I might agree to kind of being…friends?”

Jimin shuts his eyes as a frown decorates his face, he places a hand on his hip and he inhales a sharp breath, “Listen…you’re both my friends and of course I want you to be good again…but he hurt you …bad.”

“I know Jiminie, but his reasons…” you bite your lip, “Never mind.”

“Well, I don’t like it.” Trina butts in. “He fucking left you, remember?”

“Yes Trina, I fucking remember—”

“Then fucking act like it!”

“Trina relax,” Holly intervenes. “They have a long history, right? It’s hard to just forget about everything…”

Jimin stands from his chair, hands on both hips. “Fine, if we are doing this…then you better actually try. Don’t half ass shit, if you’re going to be friends then don’t be an asshole to him, don’t make snarky remarks…I know your ass.”

Jimin has a good point, you haven’t actually thought about how you will act.

“I’ll be a good girl.” You raise your right arm to salute him.

“Fucking smart ass.” He rolls his eyes.

“Are we serious right now?” Trina shakes her head, “You moped around for 3 fucking months y/n. You cried every time you even thought of Jungkook…which was a fucking lot.” She points out, “Listen, you stayed strong when you talked to him in the car. Don’t break just because you feel bad for the dude because he’s fucking pitiful. He doesn’t deserve your pity girl. He’s an asshole!”

“Trina, be nice.” Holly says sternly, reaching forward to grab on to Trina’s hand. Trina visibly relaxes and nods her head towards Holly and smiles softly.

You and Jimin share a look. Are they….?

“You…” You slam your eyes shut, Trina’s words ringing loudly in your ears. You know she’s right. “I’ll think about it some more. For now, I gotta get ready for work.”

~~~~

“Doesn’t Hazel look so pretty here?” Adam shoves his phone in your face as he gushes about his girlfriend.

“Yes dude, she’s so pretty.” You deadpan. “Now can you please put the brownies in the oven? We’re low.”

“Wait wait…here’s one of us together at the park.” He nudges his phone in your hands, you roll your eyes but you take it.

The two of them are sitting on a park bench, she’s leaning into his frame and they both have wide smiles on their faces. They seem so in love. And you know they are because fucking Adam reminds you every 20 seconds.

“Their love makes me sick.” Jade walks over, her hands patting down on her work apron, her tone is bland but she still tries to smile. “Like, we get it.”

“Who loves who more?” you begin with a toothy grin, “Adam to Hazel or Lenny to the sugar cookies?” you laugh while pointing at said Lenny stuffing his face with the reject cookies. Jade and Adam chuckle while they stare at him.

“Hey guys, really?” Lenny says with his mouth full. “You know I feel bad when we throw them away.” He pouts, crumbs decorating his lips.

“Lenny I catch you eating fresh ones all the time!” Adam points out.

“Sometimes they’re a little ugly…” Lenny reasons, “So I…”

“You don’t have to explain my guy, you just really love your cookies.” You hand Adam back his phone as you head towards the walk in freezer to take out the brownies yourself. You load up a tray and stick those suckers in the oven.

“You’re useless Adam.” Jade sticks a piece of gum in her mouth and chews obnoxiously “U-s-e-l-e-s-s. Useless.”

“You’re always so mean to me Jade what did I ever do to you?”

All 4 of you shoot your heads up when you hear the bell go off on the door of the bakery, its loud chime signaling the arrival of a customer.

“Oh.” Jade says while popping a bubble. “It’s your usual customer y/n.”

You tilt your head towards the front of the store to get a look at who she is talking about, and yup its him. Your most consistent customer who orders the same damn thing every single day. 2 oatmeal raisin cookies and that’s it.

“Can someone else just take care of him today?” you whine, “I’m not in the mood to argue.”

“You know he’s just going to ask for you…” Lenny says stuffing his face with another cookie.

“God damn it.” You huff out, you grab two gloves from the box on the counter and begin walking towards the front of the store.

You reach the front counter and take in your enemy—you mean, your customer.

“And what do I owe the pleasure Mister Oatmeal Raisin?” you raise a brow towards the man. He’s only a few inches taller than you, his hair is a sandy color today and you hate to admit it looks good on him.

“You know you could just call me by name.” the man sways side to side with a smirk on his face.

“I like Mister Oatmeal Raisin.”

He has been coming to this store for the last couple of months and you two…don’t necessarily get along swimmingly. He complains a lot and is a total smart ass. And you? Well, you’re not much better.

“Well, I’ll have my usual.” He smiles, “And you know the drill, please make sure there is a normal amount of raisins and not a million, I don’t want 8 raisins a bite. But one every now and then.”

You roll your eyes extremely dramatically, pressing the buttons on the screen for his order.

“Sir yes sir.” You salute towards him, “How could I not know the drill?”

“That’s the spirit.”

You spin on your heels and head towards the back to heat up his two cookies. You carefully select one cookie with barely any raisins and one cookie with a million, just like he didn’t want. You cackle to yourself as you place them in the baggy, feeling beyond satisfied.

“How haven’t you gotten fired?” Adam crosses his arms over his chest as he watches you, “And how hasn’t he complained about you? You do this every time I don’t get it.”

“He likes her.” Jade says plainly while scrolling through her phone.

“As fucking if!” you scoff, “He wants nothing but to annoy me!” But you can’t help but smile.

“He literally only asks for you every time you’re in.” Lenny reasons, “but you shouldn’t like him back…he likes the worst cookie on the menu. Sugar is where it’s at.”

You laugh at your coworker while walking back up towards the front of the store, reaching the counter.

“Your cookies!” you hand him the baggy with an evil smirk, “I hope you enjoy them.” You wink.

The man opens the baggy and inspects each cookie and with his own evil smirk he winks back at you, “Are we serious right now?” his sly smile doesn’t leave his face as he begins to complain, “You are such a brat.”

“$4 Mister Oatmeal Raisin.”

He hands you the cash, you put it away quickly and with a wide smile you gesture towards the door for him to leave.

“Min Yoongi.” He shakes the bag of cookies in front of him, “Not Mister Oatmeal Raisin.” He turns around and starts walking towards the door but before he exits he tilts his head to look at you one last time, “See you tomorrow…y/n.”

You feel a harsh blush creep up on your cheeks, or your whole face actually. Maybe your whole body. You feel taken aback he knows your name but then you remember you have a god damn name tag.

“Uh…yeah.”

“See you tomorrow…y/n.” all 3 of your coworkers mock in a deep voice.

“Shut up guys!” you whine into your hands, “Can we please just get back to work!”

~~~~~

A few weeks later

The drive to Jimin’s is a quick 7 minutes but you did take a little detour. You decided to stop at the pizzeria that’s on the way and grab a hot pizza for the two of you.

“Hehe.” You look over to the steamy food sitting in the passenger seat.

Jimin has been such a great friend to you all this time and you feel like you’ve never really thanked him…so, tonight you two are going to have a fun night in—he just doesn’t know it yet.

Who doesn’t love being surprised with food?

You pull up to Jimin’s apartment complex and after driving in circles you finally find a parking spot. You grab your purse, your backpack, and the pizza and make your way up to his apartment.

You knock on his front door a few times but get no answer. Maybe he’s not home? No, you definitely hear music coming from the other side…so, you decide to call him.

“Hello?”

“Jimin~ let me in!” you sing into the phone.

“You’re—you’re here?”

“Let me in already!” and with that you hang up and wait patiently outside the door.

A few moments pass before the door is opening up, when Jimin really registers that it’s you he’s kind of closing the door until only his face is shown through the crack.

“Ummm…yes?”

You quirk a brow at the boy, “What do you mean ‘yes?’ let me in!” you begin walking forward when a panicked Jimin opens the door wider to let himself outside and shut the door behind him.

“y/n…why are you here? Did we have plans tonight?” he looks down at the pizza in your hands.

“Not exactly…” you admit, “But I figured we could have a night in.”

Jimin frowns. Fucking frowns!

“Or not?” you say awkwardly.

You hear some sort of banging on the other side of the door and then it clicks.

“Oh? You have someone over?” you smirk.

“Uhhh…no. Nothing like that.” Jimin’s eyes slide to the side as he tries to think of what to say next.

“Babe—”

“Jimin!”

The door is being swung wide open and your eyes travel from some horrendous toes socks to some tight jeans to a striped t shirt to yes, Jungkook’s surprised face.

“Oh.” You both say at the same time.

You and Jungkook stare at one another for a few moments, neither of your eyes leaving the other when Jimin clears his throat.

“Sorry y/n. Jungkook is already over…” he gives you an apologetic smile.

“Is it just you two?” you ask quietly.

“Huh? Uh, yeah.”

You glance down at the pizza and think to yourself. You and Jungkook may not be friends but you can be civil? Yeah, totally! You can definitely be civil! You already bought this fucking pizza so you and Jimin are going to eat it! And you guess, Jungkook too.

“Okay, let me in.” you start shoving your way past Jimin, you watch as his and Jungkook’s eyes go wide.

“Maybe you didn’t hear him, but I am already hanging out with him?” Jungkook sputters out. He awkwardly moves to the side anyway to let you through.

“I can be civil with you Jungkook. Plus, I don’t want this pizza to go to waste. So let’s eat.” You walk through, nudging the pizza box into Jungkook’s hands, he takes it while looking at Jimin with shocked eyes.

Jimin just shrugs and follows you inside.

“Yeah, let’s eat.” He says nonchalantly.

Jungkook is left at the door with the pizza in his hands as he is left completely dumbfounded. He is malfunctioning.

“Jungkook?” you call out over your shoulder, “Hurry up, I’m hungry!”

“Yeah, Jungkook hurry up!” Jimin smirks, he isn’t totally sure what’s going on but he kind of likes it.

“So what were you guys doing before I got here?” you shove an entire slice of pizza down your throat, the sauce getting left behind on your lips.

“I was teaching Jungkook some of my dance moves…we made a bet that he couldn’t learn the entire routine in 3 times…and—”

“Let me guess, he fucking learned it.” You laugh.

Jimin groans, his head thrown back as he begins nodding his head ‘yes.’

“So annoying! What can’t he do!” Jimin throws the pizza crust in the box and Jungkook immediately picks it up and eats it.

“Pshh, I could name a few things.” You point out bitterly. “But we won’t get into that.”

“Yeah, please don’t.” Jimin pleads.

“I’m curious…what is it you think I cant do?” Jungkook quirks a brow at you and your eyes darken in his direction.

“You really want me to?” you take a napkin and wipe your lips, “It’s nothing nice.” You admit.

“Oh then yes, please don’t.” Jungkook is quick to say.

“Yes, please don’t.” Jimin begs again.

The 3 of you are sitting on the living room floor, maybe only 30 minutes or so has passed by and it’s not too awkward. But it’s not necessarily comfortable either. Jimin looks between you and Jungkook constantly, waiting for someone to crack but neither of you really speak to each other. Both of you really only communicating with Jimin.

“So Jimin, are you going to show me another routine?”

“Why? So you can prove you’re the master of everything again? No thanks.”

“Jimin, maybe you can show me a few steps?”

Jimin smiles awkwardly while Jungkook is quick to burst out laughing. You snap your head towards Jungkook and raise your brows at him.

“Why is Jungkook laughing, Jimin?”

“Umm…” Jimin smiles softly, “You aren’t the most…”

Jungkook laughs harder as he watches Jimin trying to explain.

“Aren’t the most…?” You tilt your head towards the boy.

“C’mon y/n don’t make me say it…” Jimin drags out his words in a whine, he plays with his fingers, looking around the room awkwardly.

“Just say it Jimin.” Jungkook chuckles out.

“If you’re trying to say I’m a bad dancer, we all know that’s not true!” you defend once you catch on, you pout at the boys.

“Well…”

“You have both told me I am a good dancer!”

“Well, you know how to move. But steps…following a routine…that’s different. You aren’t very coordinated.” Jimin finally admits, a sheepish grin on his face.

“He means you can roll your hips but your feet are clumsy as fuck.” Jungkook says, still laughing at the situation.

“Shut up.” You glare at Jungkook.

“No, he’s right.” Jimin begins laughing as well, he looks at you and smiles. Well, if Jimin is saying it…maybe it might be true. It’s not like you didn’t kind of know. But still!

“Fine, whatever. Don’t teach me then.”

Suddenly, Jimin’s phone is going off and he rushes to the kitchen to answer it. You and Jungkook eat your pizza in silence, awkwardly catching one another’s gaze.

“So—”

“Don’t talk to me.” You cut in. Jimin isn’t here so it’s not like you have to be totally social with Jungkook.

“Oh.” Jungkook dramatically slumps his shoulders and pouts. You watch him as he throws a silent fit like the baby he is. “Okay.”

Jimin walks back into the living room looking annoyed, he stands between you two and throws a hand on his hip.

“I have to go down to the front office, there was a mix up in packages…I shouldn’t take too long…” he bites down on his plump bottom lip, “Please be civil while I’m gone. Jungkook…” he looks at the boy then at you, “y/n…” he warns.

“Sir yes sir!” you salute towards your friend with a straight face.

Jimin only narrows his eyes as he looks between you two.

“I’m serious…” he says.

Then he is putting on some shoes and heading out the front door, the soft click making you shudder. You’re alone with Jungkook.

A few minutes pass and you both awkwardly just sit there, sometimes catching the other looking. You finally huff out and accidentally giggle.

“What’s funny?” Jungkook’s curiosity getting the best of him.

“It’s just…I feel like we’re Jimin’s divorced parents and we’re trying to be civil for our child.”

Jungkook stares at you with scrunched brows, then looks away while a chuckle escapes his lips.

“Yeah. You’re right.”

You only nod your head in response. You two go back to the awkward silence.

You aren’t used to this…this awkward and odd silence that lingers between you two. It feels so fucking suffocating you almost wish you were on total talking terms so you didn’t have to endure this shit show.

“You know I could…no, forget it.” Jungkook bites his nails as he speaks, “I…”

“What?” you don’t mean to snap at him, but somehow even talking with an attitude feels better than not talking at all.

“I was going to say…I could teach you some steps…then you could surprise Jimin. He’s been working on a salsa piece…I can teach you some? Then maybe he will stop talking shit on your dancing.” Jungkook laughs awkwardly.

“Wait—he talks shit?!” somehow this doesn’t surprise you in the least.

“Only a little.” Jungkook shows you how little with his pointer finger and thumb. “But uh, want me to show you?”

“I don’t even want to talk to you, you think I want to dance with you?” you raise a brow in amusement. You forget this boy has all the audacity.

“Dancing doesn’t have to have any talking.” Jungkook states with a sly smile.

“So you’re just going to show me the steps?”

“Precisely.”

You don’t know why, but this sounds better than actually speaking and/or just sitting in miserable silence. And maybe, just maybe you have a desire to be close to him.

“You think I could learn in time before Jimin gets back?”

“With me as your teacher? Definitely.” He fucking smirks at you and you can’t help but feel that feeling in your stomach. Not necessarily a bad feeling but a fucking feeling.

Jungkook stands to his feet and extends his hand out to you for you to take.

“Here, stand up.”

Your eyes travel from his hands to his eyes and you blink lazily at him…wait, you’re really doing this? He stares down at you and he smiles softly and it creates a warmth in your chest that you’re trying so hard to ignore. You can’t.

Even so, you hesitantly begin to reach up to grab on to his hand, once your skin touches his you feel it. The burning. You should be used to it but right now, the fire is raging and the heat is almost too much. But you let him close his hand over yours as he helps you up.

You’re now standing in front of one another, in complete silence again. But this time it’s not awkward—no, it’s a different type of tension. Your hand lingers in his, neither of you brave enough to let go of the other. Jungkook looks down at you and you up at him, and you feel a million things. But the number one thing you feel is pain. You slowly pull your hand back and break eye contact with him, your head dropping low.

“Show me already.” You whisper.

“Shh, no talking.” Jungkook quietly demands. “Only speak with your body.” He puts some music on the speakers and smirks at you.

Jungkook steps closer to you and you stay grounded in your spot, you can feel the heat of his body begin to radiate and warm you. One of his hands find yours, he weaves his fingers through your own and puts one hand on your hip, he looks down at you to warn you this is how he will guide you.

“Just follow me.”

“You said no talking Mr.Jeon.” you say almost under your breath as you stare into his eyes. Jungkook rolls his head back with a smirk on his face, he looks at you and nods.

He puts his left foot forward and steps with his right foot in the same place at center, then puts his left foot back again. You try to copy his moves but even with such simple steps you step on his feet. He looks up at you disapprovingly. You only smile at him.

You two continue to try these steps until you finally manage to understand them even just a little bit. Jungkook brings your body closer to his as you two move your hips to the music while following the simple steps. His chest flush against your own, his heart beating so loudly you can feel it. Your heart isn’t any better. You start to finally get the hang of it, the music slowly taking you to another place. Jungkook moves his hips to the beat so flawlessly and honestly? You’re doing pretty fucking good if you do say so yourself.

Jungkook’s grip on your hip tightens as he grinds himself closer to you, you feel lightheaded as you two dance to the song. Your breathing getting just a little heavier and you feel lost and pathetic but you’re too immersed in the dance to care. Jungkook finds his head falling into the crook of your neck, his hot breaths fanning against your sensitive skin and you find your hand skimming up his back until you have a handful of his hair. You lightly tug on his locks and Jungkook quietly groans. You don’t know if you’re even doing the right steps anymore, your feet moving all around the place, but somehow it’s working. You’re still following his lead and you’re sure the dance looks somewhat okay. All you care about is how both of your hips move to the beat of the music and into each other. You two are so in sync its driving you nuts.

Jungkook lifts his head and watches as you close your eyes and he closes his own eyes, his head falling forward, your foreheads close to touching. You feel so dizzy, so light and airy, so fucking great like you’re floating. You can’t help but feel the heat creep up your entire body, you feel sweat start to build as you two move. You tighten your hands around Jungkook’s neck and pull him down impossibly close, until his forehead is touching yours. Your harsh breaths mingling with his. You get dragged into the memory of when he had you pinned to his dorms mattress, you recall how his lips left kisses all along your throat, his hot breath reminding you of the past. You think of how he rolled his hips into you effortlessly then as well, you think of how you scraped your nails down his back as he thrusted into you. God, you need to think of something else but Jungkook is filling your mind.

Jungkook’s breathing picks up again, as does yours. Your memories making this dance that much more sensual. You remember the way Jungkook nibbled on your ear as he let filthy words spill from his mouth when he fucked you. God, you should not be thinking this but his body feels so good. God, you should think of anything…literally anything else. You remember how he held you close much like how he is right now. You two continue dancing to the song that is soon coming to an end. You know exactly how it feels to have Jungkook inside you, moving and stilling. You know exactly what it feels like to come all around his cock. God, you need to stop. You need to slow your breathing. God, you…you…you...he continues to guide you along to the music when you feel something hard poke against you. Oh. Oh. OH. Hard. He’s hard.

Immediately, you pull back and take several clumsy steps backward. You blink at him with wide eyes when you realize that maybe he was recalling the same memories as you. Your wide eyes concerning Jungkook.

“Okay, that’s enough lessons for today.” Your harsh breaths don’t go unnoticed by Jungkook, his own breathing quite unsteady.

“Right.” Jungkook mumbles.

You two stand around for a few moments, just taking in the experience you just shared.

You still feel…how do you feel? You just shared a hot dance with your best friend? Wait—ex best friend? You don’t know. The memory of his body moving with yours, his skin touching your skin, his breaths on your neck, his hair balled up in your hands. God, it felt so good.

But so wrong.

“Umm…thanks.” You finally say.

Jungkook perks up at the gratitude, even if it’s somewhat forced. His frown turns into a small smile and you can’t help but smile back.

“I miss you y/n.” Jungkook instantly regrets it by the look on your face. Your expression turning hard. “Sorry I—”

“No, I miss you too.” You answer honestly. “But this doesn’t change anything.”

“But why not? Do you really not want me in your life for like, ever?”

Jungkook’s questions settle deep within you. The depth they hold…it’s too much. You wonder? Is this anti-Jungkook thing permanent? Or are you just trying to teach him a lesson?

Jungkook rubs his temples as he thinks, he sighs out instead of talking more.

“Not forever.” You finally say. Jungkook looks at you, a sliver of hope flashes across his face.

“But when?” he asks softly.

Yeah y/n. When? You know you both can’t go back to how things use to be but maybe starting over? God, you don’t know what to do! You know someone like Trina will be disappointed you became friends with Jungkook again so quickly, but you know someone like Jimin would be happy his two friends are back to being on okay terms. Why are you trying to please everybody? What do you want?

“Will you ever give up?” you say a little more lightly.

“No…” he says under his breath, his eyes focusing on the TV. “Not until you agree to be my friend again.”

You look at Jungkook with disbelief written all over your face, this boy has the fucking audacity once again. You’re amused though.

“Excuse me?” you say, cleaning your ear out with your point finger. “I didn’t catch that.”

Jungkook looks into your eyes, his eyes are large and doe like and it brings you back to every moment ever that he has given you this look.

“You’re stuck with me until you love me again.” He says more firmly.

“Who said,” you look at him with soft eyes, “That I ever stopped loving you?”

Jungkook smiles, he fucking smiles. His adorable bunny smile that makes your heart race.

“You still love me?”

“Only a little.” You jut your lip out, “I mostly hate you.”

Jungkook only frowns for a second before he is smiling again, “That’s fair.”

The two of you stand in comfortable silence for a few minutes, you sway back and forth wondering what you want to say to him—you miss him, of course but…

“Let’s take it slow.” You finally break the silence. You miss him more than anything and it might be worth it to have him in your life again, “You aren’t going to be a priority in my life anymore.” You crack you knuckles, the sound filling up the room.

“I know,” Jungkook feels his heart twist at your words but at least it’s something. “We can go however slow you want y/n.”

“You are on—”

“Thin fucking ice, buddy. I know.”

You exhale a shaky breath, thinking about how to go about this, “We can text every now and then, I’m not sure I want to hang out with you quite yet.”

“Okay.”

“Maybe a group hang out first…”

“I’d like that.”

Jungkook reaches over to grab your hand but you pull back, “That’s a no from me for the affection.”

Hurt flashes across Jungkook’s features but he softens up as he nods his head. “Noted.”

You wonder if you’re making the right decision. This wasn’t easy, you know? This actually felt quite hard. But somehow you feel like some weight has been lifted off your shoulders, like things maybe just maybe will be okay.

“I won’t push myself on you, I promise.” Jungkook sits back down on the floor, crossing his legs.

“Just be yourself, Jungkook.”

“If I wanted to be myself I would be hugging you right now but that’s apparently off limits.” He jokes.

“One hug.” You open your arms timidly. You feel one hug can’t be too bad?

Jungkook widens his eyes in pleasant surprise. He stands to his feet again and opens his own arms.

“C’mere.”

You watch in disbelief as he grins with his arms wide open, expecting you to go to him! And you do. You fucking do.

His arms wrap around you, he pushes you into his chest and you feel so fucking good. So warm, so cozy. His scent making you feel dizzy again, his warmth causing you to heat up. You lean back and look at his content face, he honestly looks so fucking content. Like, this hug is everything to him. And maybe it is, but you don’t know that.

“Uh, am I interrupting something?” you both snap your heads toward the front door to see Jimin standing there with a package in his hands.

“I can come back later?” he smirks at you two.

“No no no no!” you drop your arms from hugging Jungkook and take a few steps back, “We were just—”

“We made up, Jimin.” Jungkook says calmly with the softest smile you’ve ever seen on him.

“We’re taking it slow!” you rush to say.

“Oh?” Jimin winks, he walks forward until he’s in the living room joining you two. “Does this mean you will be joining us this Thursday at Jungkook and Nick’s place?”

“Huh?”

Jungkook shifts on his feet, “Yeah, uh, me and Nick are having a small get together on Thursday…you can bring whoever you want…but you’re definitely invited.”

“Before I answer that…Jimin how did you not know about Nick and him being Jungkook’s roommate?”

“Listen! Jungkook is always HERE! I never go over there! The few times I was there Nick was never home okay?!” Jimin whines obnoxiously.

“Okay, whatever. And Jungkook, I said—”

“You said group hang outs.” Jungkook pouts.

Oh. You did say that. But this soon? And is she going to be there?

You chew on your lips before answering, “Okay. But I’m bringing Trina and Holly.”

“Oh bro, Trina is not your biggest fan.” Jimin cuts in.

“Yeah, I know how she is I already anticipated that.” Jungkook shrugs, he looks at you with a small smile.

Okay, starting over? Taking it slow? Can you and Jungkook do this? You look between the boys and smile,

“Okay. See you boys on Thursday.”

[ghostwriterdiariesxoxo]

                            Down For You *T E A S E R!*

Chapter 11: (The Cheerleader) is posting this weekend. I’ve made the decision to leave some of the original teaser off to play it safe for Tumblr. This chapter will be EXPLICITLY ADULT CONTENT ONLY compared to things Ive posted before.....except maybe “Make it Quick.” So, if for any reason you read my stuff because you like to keep it light....you’ve been respectfully warned. lol. 

Anyways...here it is :)

         The city of Atlanta is practically shimmering in the light of late morning. Sitting on the floor by the window I look out over the skyline, feeling the tug of homesickness already because by this time tomorrow Bo and I will be in the air, halfway to the city of Angels. I turn my gaze back to the purple Tulips Bo gave me yesterday, where they sit on the floor in front of me in a half glass of water and I trace my fingers softly over the waxy surface of the petals. In a way, it feels like I’ve acquired a pet goldfish or something—because I’m suddenly worried about what I’m going to do with them before we leave for L.A. Obviously I can’t expect a glass of Tulips to survive the journey through the ATL airport, through customs, a nearly five-hour flight and certainly not the airport traffic at LAX.

           “I didn’t think it was necessary to tell you, Eric.” The stress in Bo’s voice catches my attention and pulls my focus from the pending floral orphans. He paces the hotel room, chewing his nails like it’s his last meal. He’s been on the phone with Eric for nearly an hour now, after deciding to come clean about the arrangement between him and Camille. Why? Because the video that was released yesterday has sparked an all-out- WAR.

     Camille’s die-hard fan base is coming after Bo and they’re carrying metaphorical pitchforks. Because of the nature of the footage, including her crying, and him practically yelling at her, the speculations have spun out of control across the media and the general public. They’re now accusing him of being abusive, toxic and the number one trending hashtag on Twitter today is #cancelburnham.

      However—now more than ever—one thing is very clear. Camille might have a larger fan base. But Bo’s fans….are viciously loyal.  They’ve launched a counter-attack against Camille and her followers based on how obvious it was that Bo didn’t want to be kissed. And this brings us to the next highest trending hashtag on Twitter today, #cancelmouthrape. Yeah— It’s a bit theatrical but it has a nice ring to it.

     Only a few minutes later the call finally comes to an end and Bo chucks his cell, rather violently, onto the bed. It bounces like a stone skimming across a lake and crashes into the headboard. Bo sighs, resting his hands, fingers laced, on the top of his head. I’m trying to think of something comforting to say but I’m distracted by the sexy little section of tummy that shows anytime he lifts his arms.

      “Are you just hanging out with those flowers right now?” Bo grins, eyeing the Tulips.

    “They’re getting some sun,” I explain. He huffs a quiet laugh, dropping his arms back to his side. But when his smile fades he looks purely defeated. “Are you going to be okay?”

   “Of course,” he says, with a shrug. “This shit sucks but it’s not ruining my day.” He saunters over and lowers to the floor by my side. And while he gazes out over the city, I can’t help but to gaze at him. His hair and all of its sweeping, tapered glory is laying unusually perfect today and the sun hitting his bright, salmon color tee-shirt, casts a glow over his face causing the contrasting blue of his eyes to appear unnaturally vivid.

      I’ve admired a lot of gorgeous guys in my life and in a slightly shallow way I’ve always had a sense of pride in the fact that I get plenty of attention from, and have dated, nothing but exceptionally pretty men. But there’s something about Bo that strikes differently. I don’t just admire his looks—I’m transfixed by them. Sometimes it's so overwhelming it causes an ache in my chest or even frustrates me in some weird way. Like when he slightly tilts his head back and flashes that airy smile. Or how sometimes when he’s in deep thought, he tosses his head to the side, lowers his gaze, and shadows play in the pools under his set deep-set eyes. I could go on and on but the point is—he’s beautiful to me in a way I don’t think I could ever burn through or grow tired of.

    Eventually, I manage to join him in the fixed gaze over the city and I lay my head on his shoulder. And for a while, we sit quietly, just appreciating the view and the dwindling time we have left here in the heart of the Peach State.

         Several hours have passed and I’ve spent a majority of that time getting dressed for our dinner date tonight. I’m not usually the type that spends an excessive amount of time getting ready to go out, but today, I decided to take my time, for once.

           “We gotta leave in a few, babe,” Bo says, from outside the bathroom door.

           “Be out in a sec,” I reply, not able to control the smile forcing its way onto my lips. He’s only called me that a couple of times, but I’ve learned that it turns me into a gushing middle schooler, trying to hold down a squeal.

           I give myself a last glance over in the mirror and I’m feeling pretty damn good about it. As I pull the dark loose waves of my nearly waist-length hair over the front of my shoulders, I make a mental note to put more effort into doing my makeup like I did tonight because it’s pretty flawless and apparently If I take my time, I can successfully apply winged eyeliner. But none of it excites me more than finally getting to break in my gorgeous, sparkly, little black dress that perfectly shows off my shoulders, collar bones and somehow makes my legs look like they go on for days.

           Finally ready, I start out of the bathroom but stop dead in my tracks—when I get an eye full of him—in all his towering beauty, leaning coolly back against the glass, one ankle crossed casually over the other. I take a quick moment to drink him in, while his eyes are down and he’s still unaware that I’m technically in the room. The city sparkling like a backdrop behind him only adds to how sickly stunning he looks in a fitted charcoal blazer over a white collard button-down and his hands are tucked in the pockets of his dark denim dress pants until he lifts one to check his watch.

        In this moment I swear to god, I don’t care anymore about going out, because I’d rather stay in this room and give him a list of all the dirty shit I just imagined him doing to me.

         I quickly resume my entrance into the room as he lowers his watch, sweeps his hair back, and his eyes land on me. Bo’s standing here looking like a model in one of those cinematic cologne commercials and his eyes are tracing over my body in a way that mothers warn their daughters about. Although In my case, it was my father.

         I’m suddenly wracked with an overwhelming feeling I can’t identify and I can literally feel my brain turning stupid.

            “S-s- sorry I - took forever,” I stammer. Am I having a fucking stroke right now?

           “Worth the wait,” he says quietly as his eyes return to mine.

            I quickly look away, slipping on my heels, laid out on the foot of the bed, because I just now realize what the feeling is. The feeling I’m currently drowning in at this very moment. I didn’t recognize it before, because I’ve never actually experienced being painfully shy. Especially with Bo. But here I am right now, under his gaze, feeling like some innocent little lamb of a girl, naïve and untouched— and the only thing I can come up with to make sense of it, is the simple fact that regardless of how insanely sexy I’ve always found him, he was still just that obnoxious kid I had a crush on and it grew into more.  And until tonight, I haven’t once actually seen the man he’s grown into. And he has.

         Suddenly, at the most inconvenient moment, I’m starting to piece together the brilliant level of perception that Bo possesses. Because It’s only now that I’m able to read between the lines of what he’s been saying this whole time, especially since he said what he did at the aquarium and when he found my cheerleader uniform and quickly changed directions. Reluctantly putting it in the Escalade only upon my request, with zero intentions to act on his original plan for it. Because he knows exactly how I’ve seen him this whole time, and he’s afraid to ruin that image that he so clearly knows I have of him.

           He’s only recently found the ability to filter a large portion of his behavior. He told me that himself in the form of “There’s parts of me that I don’t recognize anymore… I’m a fucking asshole…” and of course, “You’ve only had sex with the version of me that loves you.”

           And that’s just it-- I’m feeling like this right now because the way he just looked at me, is genuinely a part of Bo that’s a stranger to me. He slipped—and he doesn’t even realize it. But there’s nothing about it that’s ruining his image.

           And now, I have a shark-eyed, laser focus on one thing—and one thing only. After tonight—once we get to L.A—I’m going to know that stranger. I’m going to know him in every way. There’s no other option available for him

            With that plan, now set in stone, I relax. Tonight I’m just going to enjoy my date and whatever he wants to do after….I’m so fucking down for it.

[biletdoux]

stages of love | j.jh TEASER

Pairing: jung jaehyun (nct) + female!reader

Rating: G (teaser), M (completed work)

Genre + Tropes: college!au, romance (angst, fluff, smut)

Warnings: none (in the teaser), full warning list will be posted with completed work

Length: 1.7k+ (teaser), TBA (completed work)

Summary: A playlist for the trials and tribulations of a beating heart.

(Or; your relationship with Jung Jaehyun in ten songs.)

Note: I didn’t intend to post a teaser, but maybe it will motivate me to write faster if I at least just put something out?? maybe lol. Story is based on an 8track playlist I found years ago which has been lost over time. I tried writing this story many times, but I finally got to it, so we’ll see how it goes. Let me know what you think ! <333

1. Peach by IU

smitten at first sight.

“How can I explain this feeling?”

“Alright, I think that sums up about everything we need to cover for today’s lecture. Remember, most of this will be in your final exam. Any questions before you’re all dismissed?” 

Your professor looks up from the board, scans the room and all he sees are most of the students waiting with bated breath, itching to leave the class, and half of those students having already packed their belongings in anticipation. He held them back an extra twenty five minutes today, which is notably longer than previous lectures in which he delayed dismissal.

“Okay, you’re free to go. Chapters nineteen and twenty are due the next time we meet.”

You breathe out a sigh of relief, ready to head out with the rest of the class. You like Professor Jang and find that he makes history somewhat digestible, but he had a tendency to lose track of time, which is inconvenient, but more so today since you had agreed to meet up with Yeri. You glance at your phone to see text notifications and curse to yourself. You’re already ten minutes late and Yeri is many things and impatient is one of them. 

You’re one of the first out of the small lecture hall and you shoot her a quick reply before making your way to the oncampus cafe. Through quickened strides and shortcuts engrained from cross-campus treks from class to class, you arrive in record time. You’re slightly out of breath and impressed by your speed, but you stop, frozen in your tracks when you see Yeri’s displeased face. You find her situated in a small, but cozy corner next to the windows, already unpacked with notebooks and papers strewn on the desk ready to review for exams. It's one of the best study spots in the cafe and you immediately know your best friend had to come extra early to nab such a sought after table. 

“About time,” she scowls, “what took you so long?”

You shoot her an apologetic look, “aww, Yeri,” you pout your lips a little too dramatically, “I’m sorry. I just came from history and you know how Professor Jang is.” 

Yeri looks at your jutted lips in disgust, but then her face softens in consideration. “Hm, I do know Jang.” She scrunches up her nose remembering her time in his class last semester. “That old man can talk for days on end and he never lets anyone leave class early. I guess I’ll let you go this time.” 

You beam at her knowing she’s no longer angry for your tardiness. “Great, drinks are on me today. It’s the least I can do for being late.” Yeri forgives as easily and as quickly as she loses her temper. You learned this after a few weeks of being her roommate. 

Yeri says nothing in silent agreement and you place your stuff down across the table next to the chair she reserved for you. You pull out your wallet and weave through the packed cafe to head to the order counter. The line is long and you patiently review the menu. Your roommate has consistent tastes and always orders a vanilla frappuccino regardless of which cafe she goes to, but you base your decision on your mood. You mull over your choices and by the time you reach the barista taking your order, you decide you’re in an ‘iced Americano’ kind of mood today. You have exams on top of exams you need to review for and a stronger caffeine kick is much needed.

After paying, you head back to the table with two drinks in tow. Yeri takes her drink and after you both take a few sips and catch up for the day, you dive straight to work. The two of you decide to review for statistics. 

Between re-summarizing chapters and answering review questions, you muse to yourself about how your college experience thus far hasn't been that much different from your high school life. You didn’t necessarily hate high school, per say, but it was safe to say you didn’t enjoy it. Your heart was in the arts, specifically music, and you had found studying the core subjects to be boring and tedious. You remember being ecstatic to have been accepted and enrolled in a music college, foolishly thinking your days of solving differential equations and memorizing chemical formulas were over. You specifically remember daydreaming of your hours being filled with keyboard practice and composition notes and only such things. Somehow the reality of mandatory general education courses slipped your mind when you constructed such fantasies.

Despite frivolous and preconceived notions of college, you have already survived a semester and you are nearly through your second. 

“Hey, do you remember when this stats assignment is due?” Yeri’s inquiring voice snaps you out of your brief reverie and you search your cluttered brain for a date.

“Uh, I think it’s due, like, a few days before the final, but I’d have to double check.” 

Yeri nods. “Alright, well let’s take a small break. We have some time till then, we don’t have to finish all of it today.” 

You happily agree and set down your pen. Yeri takes a sip of her frappuccino and you lean over the table to get closer to her. “Anyway, did you hear about what happened with Jiwon and Youngjae from the entertainment management department?”

Her eyes glisten with wicked interest. “No. Do tell.”

Break time is always synonymous with gossip hour between you and Yeri. 

You spend the next fifteen minutes dishing what you know and Yeri offers her own input whenever she feels fit. 

“And they think they’re being discreet, but the whole dorm knows they’ve been sneaking around, but guess wha─” Before you can finish your sentence, you were cut off by a loud and energetic voice calling out Yeri’s name.

The two of you look up to see a slim and boyish brunet waving to Yeri and excitedly making his way to your table. He looks vaguely familiar, but you can’t quite place your finger on it, so you let it go.

He smiles happily at Yeri and greets her. “Hey Yeri, how’s it going?” He notices you there and gives you a polite wave, which you return in the same manner.

Yeri replies back breezily, but with her full attention. “Good. Did you need anything, Mark?” 

He flushes just the slightest bit, but it doesn’t escape your eyes. “Erm, nothing I just wanted to remind you that we’re meeting for the music theory project tomorrow at four. I would’ve texted, but I forgot to get your number in class, and I saw you here and thought it was a good opportunity to tell you.” 

Yeri’s eyes widen, “ah right! I completely forgot about it. It’s a good thing you found me here today, huh? Here, I’ll give you my number.”

She reaches her hand out her hand expectantly, and Mark is confused before scrambling to pull out his phone. You can tell Mark looks flustered while Yeri is calmly putting in her contact information. After finishing, she hands his phone back, “okay, all set. Just shoot me a text so I have your number as well. Thanks for reminding me today or I probably would’ve forgotten and not have shown up.” 

Mark smiles again, this time a little more sure than before. “All good. I’ll see you tomorrow, Yeri.” 

They wave goodbye and you watch Mark scamper from the cafe. Your eyes follow him, but Yeri is already focused on you again, paying Mark’s retreating form no mind. 

“So…” you start.

“So?” She returns.

“He’s cute.”

“Yeah, maybe,” she shrugs. “I barely know him though. We have music theory together, but this is the first time we’ve talked all semester and we’re only talking because we got paired up for a project.”

Yeri seems apathetic and you study her closely. You notice she’s acting a little too stiffly carefree to be truly indifferent to the situation. You can’t help, but to tease her a bit. “Well, make the most out of this project then.”

Yeri gives you a hard look and you decide to let it go despite finding your best friend’s situation to be amusing. 

“Anyway, keep telling me about Jiwon and Youngjae. You never finished.” Yeri changes the topic, knowing that you might decide to pester her again if she doesn’t.

“As I was saying,” you started up again. A figure outside catches your attention and you peer outside through the window past Yeri’s shoulders. You realize it’s Mark and you watch with interest as he gestures excitedly, pointing to something in his hand, you assume his phone, to some of his friends. From there your eyes wander absentmindedly from one person to the next, and it’s when you see him. 

The reaction is almost instantaneous. 

“Like you were saying?” Yeri urges, but her words fall on deaf ears, for all your attention is captured by the boy next to Mark with heart-shaped lips.

When you see said boy laugh, you notice he has moon for eyes and you unconsciously suck in a sharp breath. You must have been staring too intently without noticing because he turns his head in your direction and you two hold direct eye contact. Like a deer caught in headlights, you freeze and lose all rational thought. Your head is completely blank. You have never seen someone so beautiful and your mind does not know how to process any sensory information at the moment.

Someone calls the boy away and the entire group of friends leave. It’s only then do you find yourself releasing a breath you didn’t know you had been holding onto so tightly. Your heart is pounding and you feel as though blood is rushing through your ears. 

“Hello?” Yeri sounds annoyed, but you struggle to find the words to answer her. 

You feel a sudden heat rush to color your cheeks a vibrant red and a feeling surges through you that leaves you out of breath and weak at the knees. A steady warmth washes over you quietly and you feel it deep within yourself and you can’t help but let out a small laugh.

How silly, you muse. Not to be dramatic, but you think you’re in love.

[theartofimagining13]

CHAPTER 4: THE CHEATER CHEETAH DRESS.

WRITTEN BY: A.Wölf.

BASED ON: Imagine: After a big discussion with your fiancé Tom…

PREVIOUS CHAPTERS: 1 DISENGAGEMENT | 2 THE TALE OF THE OFFENSE | 3 THE WEDDING GUEST

TEASER  |  POSTER    |   CHAPTER POSTER | CHAPTER TEASER

NOTES: First and foremost, I would like to thank @clockgirl94​ because if she hadn’t sent me that Javier gif, this chapter wouldn’t have been born.  ❤︎

I was reluctant to write spanish dialogue translations but then I remembered that spanish is my first language and maybe not everyone else’s lol. 

And also, there’s a subtle POV change.

Enjoy.

Funny how some humans’ defense mechanism works only in retrospect.

You get out of a messy situation, and it is only when you look back that things are crystal clear and you ask yourself why did I not see this before?

I was sitting on the floor, surrounded by boxes. After our honeymoon, Tom bought a bigger house in a quieter area of the city for us to move into. As I unpacked my clothes, I found a little summer dress that I hadn’t seen in months and I might as well have used as a noose because, as soon as I saw it, as soon as I touched it, I was out of breath and felt the biggest knot in my throat. There’s violence in the way some memories come back to us with an object or a smell; that seemingly insignificant piece of fabric unleashed in my mind a wild river of memories.

I chuckled at myself.

If I had truly wanted to forget, I would’ve burned the fucking dress but I had only managed to stash it at the bottom of a forgotten drawer, and now it was here. I got up and neatly placed it on the bed and stared at it. I suddenly felt a kiss on my left temple. Tom walked past me afterwards holding another heavy box and I saw the curious face he made once he left it on the floor and noticed the dress.

“You haven’t worn that in a long time.”  

“I know…”

He stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

“You should.” He purred in my ear before planting kisses down my neck. “You drive me crazy in it.”

My heart raced when he held me tighter and spun me around. He caught my lips with his and I felt his hands going down my back. This was triggering for me, I had to stop him without being suspicious so I gently pulled away.

“Take me out on a date when we’re done here and I just might wear it.” I lied.

Tom let out a quiet pleasure groan in advance at the mental image perhaps.

“You got yourself a deal, baby.”

He gave me a quick peck on the lips and left to carry on with the move.

I sighed. See, the thing is, Tom wasn’t the only one who that dress drove crazy, and by now, I am pretty sure we’ve established that he and his former best friend, Pedro, liked the same things. As I stared at it again, I let myself go and revisited that particular memory in the forbidden recollections book.

Tom and I were hosting a summer cookout for a few friends and family in our old garden.

It was a beautiful, warm, sunny day in June, and I was wearing the now infamous cheetah print dress with combat boots. Tom had proposed a few days prior, and I hadn’t told Pedro. The thought alone made me nervous because how was I supposed to even form that sentence?

Hello, lover. I just got engaged.

Cringe. Of course not. Which is why I chose not to wear the ring for the occasion.

It didn’t get any easier when I saw Pedro as I walked out into the backyard. He was helping Tom with the grill and the charcoal, with a beer bottle in one hand but looked up at me and stared almost longer than politically correct. And the way he did it, slowly from head to toe and with slightly parted lips which made me feel things I shouldn’t have felt; but that ship had sailed. I kept my distance mingling with others at the party and he stayed there talking to Tom for a while.

I wish I had heard that conversation.

“I asked her to marry me.” Tom said with the biggest grin. “She said yes, mate.”

Pedro tensed up and stared at Tom, he swallowed and washed down a million sour words he could’ve said with the swig of beer he took.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.” Tom chuckled. “I was… terrified.”

“Well, who in their right mind would ever do that?” Pedro half joked.

“You say that now…” Tom said. “But you just wait. I mean, look at her. Can you blame me?”

Pedro tightened his jaw as he glanced at her one more time and spoke through gritted teeth.

“Yeah, I’ve told you a million times that you’re a lucky motherfucker.” He said causing Tom to laugh. “I gotta take a leak.” Pedro announced dryly. “Hey, you got anything stronger than this?” and immediately added, “We’re celebrating, aren’t we?”

“There’s whiskey inside.”

“I’ll get it.”

He started to walk away but stopped to look back at Tom, realizing that he had forgotten something.

“Congratulations, man.” He forced a smile.

When Pedro walked into the bathroom, he splashed his face with cold water and scowled at himself in the mirror.

I put a big pitcher of lemonade in the fridge before I went upstairs but I stopped midway when I heard the hallway bathroom door opening and closing, and instinctively looked over my shoulder only to find Pedro.

I couldn’t read his expression so I kept walking, hoping that he would follow me, and aching for a moment with just the two of us alone. I faced him when I reached mine and Tom’s bedroom door and leaned against it with my hands behind my back. He got closer and placed his right hand right next to my head, towering over me as he stared into my soul.

“You think you can just walk around in that little dress and get away with it?”

“You like it?” I teased.

He slowly looked down and up again, provokingly.

“It’s driving me crazy.” He confessed in almost a whisper.

I allowed my eyes to wander and make sure that we were completely alone before I leaned in to kiss him. The kiss was cold, empty, so unlike Pedro’s trademark passionate ones, and he was rarely in a bad mood which made it twice as scary when he actually was, but I had no idea if that was the case. I pulled away and furrowed my eyebrows with concern. He cleared his throat and sniffed loudly.

“Is there something you’d like to tell me?” He inquired with the most serious face and tone.

“What do you mean?”

But he just cocked his head with condescendence and, it took me a minute, but I figured out what he was talking about.

“He told you.” I sighed. “Pedro, I was going to tell you, I just-”

“When were you going to tell me?” He cut me off.

“I-I don’t know, I couldn’t find the right w-”

I ceased talking and flinched when he struck the door with the hand that had been resting next to my head.

“Fuck’s sake…” He cursed and roamed a little with his hands on his waist.

Back then, silly me thought he was jealous, hell, I even liked it a bit. But no. Pedro was worried.

“Now?” He asked with a much more collected tone. “He had to propose now?”

Looking back, this was the only moment Pedro felt a little remorse. He was worried because my engagement had just made things even more complicated. Ironically enough, our affair had only started when this happened; we had been meeting in secret for a few weeks. We could’ve stopped then while Tom hadn’t a clue, could’ve pretended that it never happened and move on. Pedro and Tom’s friendship would’ve remained intact.

Pedro was a hypocrite, we’ve also established that. Somehow, it was okay to fuck his best friend’s girlfriend but once I became his fiancée, Pedro looked like he had finally encountered a line he could not cross.

“What the fuck am I supposed to do?” He wondered out loud while looking over my shoulder as if he could see Tom in the backyard, through the door and walls.

Truthfully, I was very happy with my diamond ring, so, I also started pondering on my future with Pedro. The fact that our affair had just started had a pro and a con in common; Pro, We had only just begun which would make it easier to cut ties right then and there. Con, we had only just begun which would make it ten times harder to quit right then and there.

I sighed with frustration when I had that moment of honest clarity.

“I guess we could… stop?” I hesitantly asked and hated it to no end.

Pedro’s face fell and he studied me briefly but carefully.

“I mean,” I added. “People might get hurt.”

Pedro blinked several times and slowly began to nod.

“You’re right. We don’t… we don’t want that. We’ve been lucky.”

But I swallowed hard because I could easily tell that he loathed this as much as I did.

“We should just… be friends.”

Again, his brown eyes traveled up and down my body and he gulped.

“Friends.” He echoed.

My heart was racing in the middle of the staring contest we seemed to be having, and I felt as if he could hear it over the silence we shared. He inched closer.

“Is…is that what you want?” He inquired.

At that point, that was the only right thing left to do, and to sort of mend things or prevent them from getting worse. But Pedro understood my silence when I just glued my eyes to his.

“Open the door.” He ordered.

As soon as I did, he followed me inside, closing it behind him and kissed me on the lips in the most urgent way, and I thought my heart would leap out of my chest. I could feel his hands going down my back as he kissed my neck and chest, and I turned around and faced the bed because I knew what we both wanted and needed. He pressed me against his body and cupped my breasts. I could feel him getting hard and it weakened my knees. His hands went underneath my dress and he pulled down my underwear before pulling the skirt up.

The sound of Pedro unbuckling his belt in a rush reverberated in my core. I desperately needed him inside of me, I wanted and needed him to fuck me till we both came. He licked his fingers and touched me, letting out a silent and proud chuckle because I was more than ready for him. Our foreplay had started from the moment he decided to eye fuck me as soon as I showed up in the garden, and our little conversation was the sugar on the rim. He lowered his pants enough to pull out his cock and caressed my entrance with the tip, using his free hand to gently and slightly bend me over the bed.

And he tortured me like this for a few seconds that felt much longer to me, inserting just the tip, slowly going out and in again until I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore and he finally quickened the pace. I wanted more. I needed more. I needed him, all of him, and I moaned when he finally granted me my wish.

“Fuck…” He breathed out and just stayed inside of me while I adjusted to him.

Pedro grabbed me by the hips with a tight grip and started fucking me like I had been silently begging him to; Hard and fast and just making me his. His low grunts and his ragged breath were turning me on even more. One of his hands slid up my back until his fingers got lost in my hair and he grabbed a fistful as he kept pounding into me, but it moved down to my neck, prompting me to stand up straight as he wrapped his arms around my waist and one greedy hand cupped one of my breasts.

“Te gusta? (You like it?)”

I groaned. I loved it when he whispered things in Spanish in my ear, and adding the fact that we had to be as quiet as possible was driving me over the edge.

“Dime. (Tell me).”

“Yes.” I breathed out. “Pedro…”

He chuckled again, knowing what I was implying and begging for, and he nibbled my neck before whispering once more.

“Te quieres venir? (You want to cum?)” He asked even though he knew I was dying to cum. I could even hear his mischievous grin. “Vente, mi amor. (Cum, my love).”

The rhythm of his thrusts increased again and he held me tighter. My whole body tensed up, I could feel it, the tingling sensation slowly taking over until it possessed me whole, mind and soul. Pedro had to cover my mouth as I came undone in his arms, he held onto me for dear life and buried his face in the crook of my neck as he poured himself into me and let out a suffocated moan against my skin.

With relief washing over us, our heart rates began to settle, and our foreheads were covered with a thin layer of sweat.

As I freshened up and washed my face, I stared at myself in the mirror and wondered if that had been the last time for Pedro and I.

Perhaps we had said goodbye in the only way we knew how.

I entered the kitchen and poured myself a much needed glass of ice cold lemonade before I was joined by my fiancé.

“I think we should tell them.” Tom said while taking out a few more meat packages from the fridge.

“What?” I asked in a blissful yet lethargic daze.

“About our engagement.” He placed them on the counter.

He stood in front of me, waiting as if he was asking for permission and looked at my glass of lemonade which he ended up stealing to take a sip.

But when he looked down at my hand, he frowned.

“Where’s your ring?” He asked.

“Oh, I… I took it off when I washed my hands and must’ve left it in the bathroom.” I lied.

“Put it on.” He said.

It was all the same now, Pedro knew. So, I did as I was told for Tom to make the announcement in the garden. I heard the three C’s of celebration; clamoring, cheering, and clapping, but all I could see was Pedro sitting in the back, and when his brown eyes found mine, he just showed a cynical smile and raised his glass of whiskey, at me, the cheeky bastard who had just fucked the fiancée in the cheetah dress.

Or the cheater in the dress.

I was sure that Pedro was just as addicted to me as I was to him. Engagement or not, we just weren’t ready to stop. If anything, he craved me more fiercely than before, and that ring on my finger just turned him on even more.

We had only just begun.

I blinked several times as the arousing memory dissolved and I became aware of my surroundings.

I bit my lip and wondered if Pedro still thought of these encounters of ours. I asked myself if he missed me, if he thought about me, if he touched himself while doing so, if he envisioned me while fucking someone else. Or the possibility of an ugly truth where he had just moved on and I meant nothing, but then I remembered my wedding day and his drunken honesty.

Of course he fucking thought of me.

[snifflyjoonie]

Hey, I know you just got back and you have a lot of requests and everything but I was wondering if your going to work on your AUs. The FlowerShop AU and the CoffeeShop AU, and if so can you give us a little teaser of the next chapter? I'm happy your back and I hope everything going well in your life. <3

Hi anon, sorry for being a few days late to your message!! I am definitely going to be continuing my AUs! I am currently picking back up where I left off with the FlowerrShop!AU as well as the CoffeShop!AU, and I'd be more than happy to give you little snippets of each <3 Thank you for such a sweet message! Can't wait to have some content posted for you guys soon! Enjoy!

Firstly, here's a snippet of "Dark Roast" the next installment of the Coffee Shop series!

*

“He seems confident.”

“You think?” Taehyung questions with a raised brow. “You haven’t even met him.”

“Yeah, but he attached a photo of himself to his resumé.” Jimin points out, his forefinger leaving a tiny smudge on Taehyung’s phone screen. “You have to be confident to do that.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.” Taehyung snorts out a laugh as he scrolls through the resumé. “He could just be, I don’t know, super cocky or something.”

Jimin shakes his head.

“Not him. I can see it in his eyes.”

Taehyung rolls his eyes but raises from his seat with a huff. Jimin stares up at him expectantly as the other begins to tie an apron around his waist.

“Look. If you have a good feeling about him, then why don’t I call him in for an interview?. How’s that sound?”

“That sounds great.” Jimin smiles wide before he too stands up and begins hunting for his apron. “If it doesn’t work out, I owe you a coffee.”

“Jimin, we get free coffee.”

“Yeah, but I’ll make it for you.”

*

It's going to be a prequel of Jungkook actually getting hired at the shop! Because of his sensitive nose, the coffee really bothers him, and the other boys end up thinking he just has a cold when he comes in for his practice shift. Hopefully you guys enjoyed Tae and Jimin's goofy banter, lol.

Next up, here's a snippet of "Broken" which will be the next installment of the Flower Shop series!

*

Jimin hears the words before he fully registers Jungkook resting stomach down on one of Yoongi’s tattoo beds.

“Oh shit, Yoongi — your boyfriend is here.”

He sees Yoongi glance over his shoulder towards him briefly before turning his focus back onto the half finished artwork on Jungkook’s back. If he was at all taken aback by Jungkook labeling him as “boyfriend” his face didn’t show it.

“Hey.” He greets, and Jimin is barely able to make it out over the buzzing sound of his tattoo gun.

“Hey, sorry to bug you.” Jimin huffs as his soggy hair drips cold raindrops down his cheeks. “Thought I’d drop off some food. Hey, Gguk. There’s enough for you too, if you want.”

Jungkook makes an appreciative noise as he turns to Yoongi with mock surprise plastered on his face.

“Yoongiiiii, I would die for your boyfriend.”

There it is again, that word...boyfriend. This time he sees Yoongi scoff slightly before deciding to speak up.

“He’s not my boyfriend.” He mumbles as he turns his attention back to Jimin, his expression unreadable. “Just put the bags on that table there.” He nods towards a small coffee table that sits in the corner of the room. “I’m a little busy right now.”

Jimin can see Jungkook’s eyes dart to him like a homing beacon. He’s waiting for a reaction, waiting to see if what Yoongi said was out of line or really the truth. Jimin doesn’t give it to him. He simply gives a tight smile, nods, and sets the food down where Yoongi instructed.

“It’s Chinese.” He murmurs. “Hopefully it’s okay.”

Yoongi hums instead of responding. He’s too focused on what he’s doing which Jimin finds both admirable as well as frustrating.

*

What could possibly be going on here? lol. I don't want to give too much away, but hopefully this gets you guys excited to know what happens!

I'm also working on a prequel for the Flower Shop series entitled "Yakult and Soju" that I'd love to give a teaser of as well! As a fair warning, this installment is emeto-centric and is featured in the snippet I'm posting! If that is something you are sensitive to please feel free to scroll past this snippet to the next one!

*

A wave of rancid soju and yogurt sprays out of Yoongi like water from a firehose and splatters wetly against both the wall and concrete below.

He retches again, loudly and dramatically, and it takes every ounce of power Namjoon has to keep his own stomach contents down as the smell of curdled milk and stomach acid hits him in the face like a brick.

“Fuck, Yoongi…” He slurs as Yoongi vomits a seemingly endless stream of sick onto the ground. Namjoon can see he’s trembling with the force and does his best to stumble over to the other.

Yoongi coughs wetly as Namjoon wraps an arm firmly around his waist to steady him, the other hand coming to rest against his back.

“I told you those cocktails are bad news.”

Yoongi tries to shake his head and Namjoon quickly realizes he’s in no state to respond as another productive, sickening belch reminds Namjoon of how much they actually had to drink that night.

He swallows thickly and tries with all his might to ‘mind over matter’ the entire situation.

*

This prequel is taking place during Namjoon and Yoongi's bartending days, and gives a little backstory to how the two know each other. Hopefully you guys will end up liking this one, too! Poor Yoongi, lol.

Aaaaand just for fun, I'm also starting to work on the next next installment of the Flower Shop series, lol. I don't think I ever posted the name of this installment, but it will be "Trust Me"! There's not much to it yet, mainly just snippets of dialogue, but I thought it would be fun to tease you guys a little with this one, too. Here you go!

*

“I didn’t take you as the type.”

“Do you have to be a certain type of person to want a tattoo?”

Yoongi smiles softly. This was one of the things he loved most about Jimin.

“No.” He chuckles. “I guess not.”

Yoongi blows out a breath and adjusts himself in his seat.

“So,” he starts, folding his hands together. “What were you wanting?”

*

Like I said, not much going on here yet. But it's still in the works!

I really hope you guys like all of these sneak previews. I hope I get something finished for you soon! Thank you again for always being so sweet with me.

[p-and-p-admin]

Interview given to The Severus Snape and Hermione Granger Shipping Fan Group.  (sharing here Admin approved)

https://www.facebook.com/groups/199718373383293/

Hello IShouldBeWritingSomethingElse and welcome to Behind the Quill, it’s wonderful to finally have the chance to chat with you.

Many readers will know you from your extensive catalogue of works like Convergence, A Soul-Mate’s Kiss, Entangled and of course, The Ribboned-Witch

Okay, let’s jump right in. What's the story behind your pen name?  It’s a simple one. I should be writing anything but fanfiction, ie o-fic. I need the pennies! Which Harry Potter character do you identify with the most? Probably a mix of Snape and Granger. Snape’s general curmudgeonliness (is that even a word?!) and Granger’s swottiness, (also perhaps not a word…) Do you have a favourite genre to read? (not in fic, just in general) Romance. Always romance. I am addicted to my Happily Ever Afters. Do you have a favourite "classic" novel? Persuasion by Jane Austen. Reunited lovers, a fave trope. At what age did you start writing? 14. How did you get into writing fanfiction? I blame Wolverine. I fell into Rogan (Wolverine and Rogue) in 2011, then starting writing it, when I *should* have been writing my o-fic…. What's the best theme you've ever come across in a fic? Is it a theme represented in your own works? The Marriage Law Challenge. Can that be called a theme? I love that, and have written a few. It’s probably an equal love with soul-mates/fated mates. I’ve written a few of those, too. What fandoms are you involved in other than Harry Potter? I’m a fairly linear shipper. So it was Rogan, then Sherlolly…then SSHG and it’s been only that for *gulp* almost seven years. If you could make one change to canon, what would it be? Do you have a favourite piece of fanon? Naturally, Severus Snape lives (not that he died in the first place!). Fanon? At the minute, I’ve read so much fanfiction, I’m not sure what’s solely in the books anymore! Dark Revels, maybe? Or could Jason Issac’s idea for long hair for Lucius Malfoy be considered fanon? lol Do you listen to music when you write or do you prefer quiet? It varies. Sometimes it’s whatever I have listed on Amazon Prime, or various rainy ASMRs. I so have a creativity sound thing that’s supposed to tap into your writing brain. It runs for 3 hours and does *seem* to work…when I remember to turn it on! What are your favourite fanfictions of all time? Hope Reawakened - Georgesgurl117 A Place in the World - Noodle In the Darkness in Which We Are Made - Corvusdraconis A Number of Ways to Kill Ron Weasley - Ms-Figg From the Corner - Coffeeonthepatio Chocolate Enchantment - Vivian B Forged in Flames - MsWhich Owned - TwilightDarkness82 Three Pregnancies and an Adoption - rhapsodybree A Witchhiker’s Guide to Beltane - TeddyRadiator Romancing the War - Pubella The Marriage Benefit - Miamadwyn The Nature of the Phoenix - scatteredlogic Vomica Domintor - Always_ss There are probably fistfuls more… lol Are you a plotter or a pantser? How does that affect your writing process? A panster. Which is why I often get to the middle of the middle of a story (*the* hardest place!) and it stalls! What is your writing genre of choice? Romance. Always. Which of your stories are you most proud of? Why? Ignis Tactus, mainly for the feel of it. And chapter 5, because of quality of the writing. It’s intimacy. Did it unfold as you imagined it or did you find the unexpected cropped up as you wrote? What did you learn from writing it? I had a vague idea of where it was going and wrote the first chapters in a few days. Chapter 5 took longer - as the smexiness always does. It was a reminder to pick out the right detail, which is a simple idea and the hardest to achieve. How personal is the story to you, and do you think that made it harder or easier to write? It wasn’t personal, I don’t think. A story is always a tapestry to me, weaving threads together to make sense.  What books or authors have influenced you? How do you think that shows in your writing? Probably from years back, Orwell and Hemingway. And a shedload of poetry. It’s made me aware of language and to aim to use the least words I can to sharpen the imagery, dialogue and setting. Do people in your everyday life know you write fanfiction? My other half does and that’s about it. I keep my fanfiction separate from my o-fic world. How true for you is the notion of "writing for yourself"? I like to write what I want to read, so very true? lol How important is it for you to interact with your audience? How do you engage with them? Just at the point of publishing? Through social media? I’m a social media hermit, tbh. I’m on the usual sites, because I have to be for work…and even then, I can happily wander away for weeks! I envy people who do social stuff naturally. What is the best advice you've received about writing? Look at your verbs and make them strong. What do you do when you hit writer's block? I’m been blocked for about 2/3 years, which is why I’ve slacked on writing, both fanfic and o-fic. I’m still trying to find a way around it. At the minute, I mostly play with digital art/Daz3d. Has anything in real life trickled down into your writing? Very probably. I do sit and ‘feel’ the emotion in a scene as I write it. Do you have any stories in the works? Can you give us a teaser? I’m plugging away on bits and pieces, the odd few hundred words here and there. So this is a bit of a bare snippet from The Offer of Just One More (yes, I also peck at that!) “Victoire said you’re mean, Daddy.” Alexandra’s little Severus scowl was quite plain. “I said you weren’t, so she tried to pull my hair. So we sat on her,” she pointed to herself, Oona and a beaming Olivia, “until she said you wasn’t…weren’t.” Hermione sighed. The Burrow was a bloody minefield. And she was certain there was more than Ron stirring trouble, through their children, to get in a dig at Severus. “You shouldn’t sit on people who disagree with you,” Severus murmured. There was a light in his eyes. Hermione was sure she’d get the blame for their three daughters being little hellions. A lifted eyebrow and the murmured, “Draco? An attack of birds? Setting me on fire?” “She sat under the tree with us last week when you were at the Burrow,” Emily said. Obviously their eldest had known about the altercation. And supported it. The Snape girls were just as protective of their father as he was as them. It was sweet. In a Mafioso sort of way… “It was the troll then, too. And she thinks you’re the best storyteller, now.” “Troll!” Meredith cried, waving her juice cup, obviously at the end of her patience in waiting for her story. “The troll, indeed, Meredith.” The toddler beamed up at her father and clapped her hands. Severus glanced down at a still-sleeping Hannah. His voice was soft as he asked. “So…who is the hero of this story?” Five little girls grinned and looked towards Hermione. She blushed. “Mummy!”

“And who is the villain?”

“The Troll!” Oona and Olivia declared. “Because he attacked her.”

“Quirrell. He released the troll.” Alexandra said. Emily shook her head. 

“She wouldn’t be in the toilet at all without Ronald Weasley.”

“Weedy!” Meredith laughed and the semi-circle of girls fell into giggles. Her eldest had recently taken a sharp dislike to her old friend. Hermione’s eyes met her husband’s. They would have to keep an eye on what the ginger menace was saying around their children. Or wait four years, and let Emily hex him. Any words of encouragement to other writers? Write what calls to you…and find your fun in playing with language. Hunt out those moments where you go ‘ooh, that’s good!’ Thanks so much for giving us your time. No worries. A pleasure :)

[harunokazesblog]

I know I asked you question (sorry) but I wanted to remake again to add more on what's going with chapter 137 if that's okay.

If Porco, Ymir (104th cadet), Grisha, Kruger Kushava, (previous beast titan holder) Bertholdt, Marcel, are willing to help the Alliance where are the rest of the previous titan shifters that want to stop the rumbling (and Eren) what would that prov in the end? Will the cycle of hatred (that Eren mentioned in Chapter 130) finally end or keep on repeating itself (like Kruger mentioned)? What is the mission exactly?

If Ymir (104th cadet) wanted Historia to have a future why would she agree to help the Alliance to stop Eren (and the rumbling)? Does Ymir (104th cadet) know that Eren has protected Historia for the past 4 year's to keep her safe?

If the rumbling has stopped (for now) it isn't over for Eren because when he fully wakes up (inside his titan form) the real fight starts. Remember in Chapter 117 when Reiner held Eren down and Eren was pissed off I'm betting it will happen again in Chapter 138.

The next chapter (I think) we might get a pov view (or a flashback) with Eren and Historia to continue the rest of the conversation (and confirmed the truth) where it left off and a fight between Eren and Reiner for the final (5th) battle begins. Also if the previous (dead) titan shifters are helping the Alliance I wonder if the founder Ymir might appear to join the fight to help Eren?

I wonder what Eren might be planning because we got nothing from him yet. The last time we saw Eren was in Chapter 133 (as a kid) he hasn't been show since then.

Do you think Isayama wants us to think that the Alliance might win against Eren (and the rumbling) and Armin will survive because he's the narrator of the story (in the anime not manga) and the final panel (teaser) means nothing of the character holding the child while saying: you are free? Sometimes if a narrator dies then there could always be someone else to replace them in the story right?

The foreshadowing of you are free was mentioned first by king fritz (in Chapter 122 as he freed Ymir to go and die in the forest) then 11 chapter's later it was also mentioned by Eren Yeager (in Chapter 133) so if it's possible that Eren (maybe) will survive at the end of Attack on titan chapter 139 (final chapter) then it will make sense that he will the one holding the child (from Historia) in the final panel (teaser) that Isayama has revealed in 2018 in his interview.

It can't be Grisha because he's dead and he also forced his own child to inherit a titan curse to live for 13 year's. A parent has a choice to either listen to their child or not.

It can't be the farmer (unknown) because how would he know that the child is free? Free from the cycle of hatred that Eren is trying to get rid of by unleashing the rumbling (colossal titans) and destroying Marley? So what the he'll has the farmer done to free the child (that may not be his flesh and blood)?

Only 2 chapter's left then it's over for Attack on titan manga (even though we still have the anime to watch for season 4 until that ends) and honestly I have no idea what to do after Attack on titan ends for me.

Hello, sorry for the delay with the answer, mostly I answer it from my cellphone, but since it is a rather long question I do it from my laptop (LOL).  Reading all your post, I agree in the majority; let's remember that the author throughout this last arc has shown Eren's POV on half of pieces (ch 122 - 130 - 133) his true motivations and real intentions are still a mistery, like this cover he hide jealously his hand.

Characters like Armin or Mikasa (his best friends) have failed to understand Eren, a clear proof is the currect Anime Director, he must constantly ask Isayama about the scripts, try to understand and translate correctly the character, the same seiyuu Yuki Kaji (who reads the manga) can’t understands his character 100%, it’s certainly something that the author does on purpose to give the final WOW factor to us the readers...and it will be interesting to see.

Chapter 130 give us pieces, but they’re so mixed and put in a way that It can cause different interpretations and that is what the author wants, he gives us the clues but at the same time misleads the reader.

On that chapter Eren mixed like 4 POV’s (on different times) with Zeke, Yelena, Floch and Historia...

Ironically Historia is not on that panel where the rest of 'friends' are...

To add some point on your comment  ch 137 Eren didn’t appear in any panel, no expression, no surprise of defeat, or anger like Ymir.

Hey Armin and CIA are ruining his plans!!! ... this obviously raises doubts that he has been defeated, he simply has allowed things to happen on this way 

Why? We don't know yet the only clues we have is that Eren had access to a future moment that hasn’t been revealed yet, and that allows his current friends freely to fight.

Eren on this entire manga he has repeated the word 'freedom' ‘free’ more than 50 times

and the man on the last panel mentions the same thing, (how funny XD)

If Isayama really said that the man on the final panel "surpassed his father"... well...

Thanks for asking!

[dulce-pjm]

tag game !

tagged by @jtrbluv !! ty love, i’ve seen this one going around and it looked fun !!

1. what fandoms have you written for (but do not currently)?

i only started writing fanfiction this year, so bts is the one and only lol 

2. what fandoms are you currently writing for?

bts !! i think i’ll be sticking to just bts x reader fics during my time here :) (but i am def a big fan of other groups and post about them sometimes !! my other interests can be found through the navi and i’m down to chat/fangirl anytime)

3. how long have you been writing?

like five or six years? i used to write original stories on wattpad in middle school but i have unfortunately forgotten both the username and password to that account and just realized those monstrosities might still be floating around on there oof 

4. on which platforms do you post your stories?

just tumblr !! i’m the process of making an ao3 in case something happens to my account, but i probably won’t crosspost unless i have to, just kinda depends

5. what is your favourite genre to write?

def fluff and comedy !!! i enjoy angst but i’m a bit of a method actor in that i deeply feel whatever i’m writing so i normally don’t make it far writing angst lol but i will try one day !!

6. are you a pantser or a planner?

planner for sure !! i have def written fics that weren’t planned, but i tend to feel way better about the ones that i plan out. they flow better when i plan them and when you know where your story is going it’s easier to foreshadow and actually build tension towards the climax and ending !!!

7. one shot or multi-chapter?

it really just depends on the story !!! it’s all in how i envision it tbh. if i see the scenes more as episodic and almost separately working towards the ending, then it’ll probably end up fitting into chapters. but if the scenes and arcs all really rely on each other and flow as a group, then yeah it’s a big one shot !! as a reader, i tend to binge anyway so it doesn’t matter to me lol

8. what is the perfect chapter length in your opinion?

lol again it depends on what suits the story !! and i think it’s fun sometimes for there to be a variety of chapter lengths 

9. what is your longest published story? is it complete?

stepsisters and squires at 11.0k, and yes it’s complete !! although my current biggest project is probably going to end up around 15k and if i had to guess, part two will probably be a bit shorter than that 

10. which story did you enjoy working on the most?

hmmmm for sure @alpacaparkaseok’s request case closed!! i was being very silly writing it and had a grand time, but takes two to tango is a close second behind !!!

11. favourite request you've have written and why (if any?)

oh well there we go it’s case closed !!! i love some good silly ridiculous romance and i feel like i did an okay job achieving that lol

12. are there reoccurring themes in your stories?

awkward people finding love ???? LOL and lots of overthinking only to realize things aren’t quite as big as they first appeared wait omg yeah that’s it that’s the one lmao. scrolled through my masterlist and it seems that the central conflict is always the main character versus their own mind which is basically my day-to-day life so makes sense i guess 

also i’ve accidentally written people talking over each other and then said something like “timing’s funny” right after in two separate fics and needless to say i’m disappointed in myself LOL how did i do that ??? tsk tsk 

13. current number of wips?

ahhh i’m not really sure how to count them but i’m like actively writing around four or five, i tend to bounce around and then suddenly binge write an entire one

14. three things you have noticed about your own writing?

hmmm well 1) we’ve learned my characters are too caught up in their own heads (like me muhahaha), 2) i tend to write pretty colloquially even though i have the vocabulary to be more descriptive lol, and 3) even when i don’t mean to i tend to end up writing based off of things i’ve experienced before

15. a quote you like from a published story

lol this isn’t particularly well written or anything i just think it’s funny and i really enjoyed writing this scene. it’s from stepsisters and squires !

“Maybe you can trick the witch!” You suggest, words muffled by the dessert you’re chewing on as you blatantly talk with your mouth open. All manners have been abandoned as Taehyung is eating two eclairs at once, equally focused on the matter at hand. “Well, no, maybe trying to trick a magical scary lady is a bad idea.”

i’m very attached to tae’s character despite him making a very minor appearance and i love his and the oc’s chaotic energy together haha !! i’d like to write him his own spin-off sometime based on their interaction 

16. a quote from an unpublished story

hehe imma keep teasing the tae twoshot in the hopes that it makes me ACTUALLY FINISH IT FJKDLSHGLSDKJF anyway ~~~

“Your singing, on the other hand, is just fantastic,” he adds, smirking as he side-eyes you. He suppresses a laugh when he sees your mortified expression. You’re quick to cover it, crossing your arms and feigning pride.

“I know. You guys are lucky I’m not participating in the battle of the bands. I’d crush you.” Taehyung full on giggles then and you don’t hate it all that much. It’s a little squeaky though. But then his eyes light up and he’s grabbing you by the shoulders, a desperate look in his eye.

“Wait, would you wanna join? Because we could really use a mezzo voice, it’d completely change the sound—”

hopefully an official teaser will be dropped soon we’ll see !!!

17. space for you to say something to your readers

thank you guys for being so patient and supportive :( i know i’ve been very sporadic about posting and really haven’t posted at all in like a month and a half. it was very much my intention to write a bunch and then release things on a schedule (and it still is!!) but things have been difficult recently and prevented that from happening. to get to the point, you guys are so great and every piece of feedback and every like and every follow absolutely makes my heart soar. you guys remind me that i’m still capable of writing even when i really don’t feel like it and i appreciate you !! much love <333

tagging @softbobamilktae and @hyungieyoongi my go-to’s lol (sorry if you’ve already done it !!!)

[softspiderling]

swanky fortune - part nine | t.h.

Summary: Tom almost made you forget the downsides of spending time with a famous movie star, but then again, it wasn’t really his job to remind you of them

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Song I listened to while writing: Mad Love by Mabel

Author’s Note: helloooo I literally was procrastinating writing this chapter even tho I wrote a third of it right after I posted part eight I’m a desaster

Warnings: a lot of cursing and slightly steamy scene I guess? lol idk

Word Count: 4,3k

Masterlist

Teaser | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten 

Tom pressed on the call button before he put his phone to his ear, patiently waiting as it rang. It was still fairly early in the morning and he was sure that you were still asleep, so he climbed back in bed after having brushed his teeth not wanting to wake you too soon.

The same couldn’t be said about his best mate, though.

“You better have a good reason for calling me this early,” Harrison groaned when he picked up the phone and Tom grinned.

“Good morning to you too, Haz. Late night?”

“Harry and Tuwaine dragged me out clubbing again and we didn’t come home until three, so yeah,” he sighed through the phone. “Don’t tell me you’re just calling me to ask me what we were up to last night.”

Tom turned in his bed and looked at the different framed photos you had on your desk. You had insisted on sleeping in Luisa’s bedroom and let him have yours the night before. It was odd to see your room without you in it, but he felt like he got to know you even more with every detail he discovered in your bedroom. It wasn’t like he was snooping around, but the way you decorated your walls or what kind of things you had on your desk really said a lot about a person.

“Uh no, I was actually calling to tell you about my own night.”

“OH!” Harrison sounded much more awake now and Tom could picture him sitting up in his bed to be fully aware.

“Definitely tell me about your night. How’s Y/N? Did she like your surprise?”

“She’s great,” Tom answered with a smile on his face and Harrison hummed. It was a brief answer and definitely not enough details, but Harrison knew his best friend to know what this meant.

“I see. Anything else you want to tell me?”

“Uh we went out for drinks and I met her friends, who were really nice by the way and uh, yeah. Oh, and we kissed.” He mentioned nonchalantly and with a grin he heard Harrison splutter.

“You did?! You div, why didn’t you lead with that? That’s so great to hear! How was it?”

Tom laid back on his back and stared at the ceiling, his cheeks pink when he thought of the kiss from last night.

“It was really good Haz. I just couldn’t help myself- she was wearing my leather jacket and her cheeks were red from all the beer we’ve had and then, ugh. There’s just something about her.”

“You really like her a lot, huh?”

“I do, yeah.”

“Does that mean you’re together now? You know, officially?”

Tom hesitated, biting on his lip.

“I don’t really know, to be honest. We haven’t really spoken about it.”

Harrison groaned and Tom winced.

“Mate, this is basically just the same that happened the last time you two kissed. You have to talk to her about this. I mean, what even are the two of you?”

Tom sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I know, Harrison. I’ll talk to her today, I swear.”

“You should. It’ll help,” Harrison promised, before he let out a loud yawn.

“Alright I’ll let you get back to sleep. I think Y/N’s up now, so I have to get up,” Tom said into his phone and pushed the blanket to the side as he sat up.

“Okay then. Let me know how that talk goes, okay?”

“I will. Thanks, Haz. Love you, mate.”

“Love you too Tommy,” Harrison said before he hung up.

Tom shut his phone off before he ran a hand over his face with a groan, stilling when he heard a knock on the door.

“Tom you up?” you asked, your voice muffled through the closed door.

He swung his legs out of the bed and opened the door with a breathless smile.

“Morning love!” he greeted you brightly and he could tell that you needed a second to avert your eyes from his naked chest, a hint of pink on your cheeks.

“Morning.”

Tom smirked and reached out to stroke over your cheek gently. “Take a picture, it lasts longer.”

Scoffing, you flipped him off and headed to the kitchen, with Tom trudging behind you, tugging a t shirt over his head.

“Do you want coffee or tea?” you asked as you headed over to your coffee machine to get it started, glancing at his direction when he grabbed two mugs out of the cabinet.

What the fuck was he doing feeling so comfortable in your kitchen already? Then again, he did spend god knows how long in your kitchen cooking for you. It made sense that he got familiar with all your cupboards and shelves.

“Coffee,” he replied, with a teasing grin. “I only drink English tea, darling.”

You rolled your eyes and turned the coffee machine on, turning around to reply to him, when he caged you in with his arms, placing the mugs on the counter on either side of you. The goosebumps on your neck started spreading to your arms when he swooped down to kiss you, his hands holding your cheek gently.

Though caught by surprise, you reciprocated the kiss with a soft sigh, your hands snaking around his neck to pull him closer. Tom quickly got the hint and it wasn’t long until he hoisted you up on the counter, his mouth still working yours eagerly as he licked into your mouth with his tongue, pressing his body closer against yours.

Your toes curled at all the sensations you were feeling at the same time and you felt a shudder run down your spine, before you pulled away from him, your mouths separating with a smacking sound. Turning to the side to push the mugs towards the coffee machine, you knew he was staring at you because you could feel the blush creeping up your neck.

Regaining your composure, you turned back to face him and Tom was grinning fondly at you.

Dork.

“Stop staring at me,” you demanded and he poked your nose with his finger before he moved to pour your coffee mugs, a smug grin still clearly visible on his face.

“So,” he started, handing you your coffee while preparing his own. “What’s on the agenda today?”

You pursed your lips, stirring milk and sugar into your coffee. “I was thinking of going to lunch at a lovely Italian restaurant I know and then I really hope that you brought some sunglasses because I’m going to show you around the city, because the weather is amazing.”

Tom glanced out the window with his coffee mug on his lips, humming in agreement. “Sounds like a good plan. Do you think you can show me your university?”

“Why would you want to see my university?”

“I just want to see how you spend your days and I guess I like how different it is compared to my life,” he shrugged and you eyed him in amusement before nodding, thrumming your fingertips on the counter.

“Yeah okay, why not. It’s probably not going to be that crowded either.”

You suddenly were reminded of the last time you almost got crushed by screaming fans and paparazzi and shook your head out before jumping down from the counter.

“Breakfast?”

“Breakfast.”

The two of you didn’t fumble long with breakfast, eager to spend the sunny day outside and with stomachs filled with some scrambled eggs and toast, you walked out in the warm summer air, the sun shining brightly on your naked skin.

Even though it hasn’t been 24 hours since your last (admittedly very awkward) outing, it still felt like a lot has changed between the two of you even without having to talk about it. That was why it was almost an instinct for you to reach out to lace your hand with Tom’s and the smile that resulted from that made it even better.

Your first stop was campus and taking the subway, which was slightly more crowded than you thought it would be, had Tom hide his face in the crook of your neck, with his cap backwards on his head and your hand resting lazily over his shoulder.

A few looks from passing people were shot in your direction but it was more of a disapproving of the PDA you were showcasing than a sign of recognizing a famous actor walking among them. But you couldn’t say that you cared, honestly. You were too busy giggling at his behavior, your skin warm from the sun and from his warm breath that was fanning out on your collarbone.

Campus was luckily not that busy. There was the occasional student rushing through campus but you knew from your own experience that they were far too preoccupied with their own thoughts and worries to notice their surroundings.

“So the library is over there and the cafeteria is in the building next to it,” you told Tom, walking backwards so you could look at him while you talked.

“I mostly spend my time in the library to do research or to study, like basically every other student and yeah. Lecture halls are over there and this is our beautiful campus,” you concluded with a dramatic flourish of your arms.

“Have you ever thought about a career in tour guiding?”

Tom was wearing a teasing smile and you tsked when you fell back into step with him. “You think you’re really funny, don’t you?”

“I do actually, yeah. Didn’t you know that my dad is a comedian?”

Lunch was equally amazing. For the first time since you’ve known Tom, he was taking advantage of his stardom and asked for a private little corner table at the restaurant, which the staff were happy to give to you.

“Oh my god I’m so full,” Tom groaned, looking down at his half-eaten pizza. You shrugged with your shoulders, putting your napkin down on your empty plate.

“I told you not to order a whole pizza. Their whole concept is huge pizzas, what made you think you’re any different from the rest of their customers?” you chastised him and his eyes darkened, the crease between his eyes deepening.

“I always finish my food, how was I supposed to know that their pizzas are huge?”

“Because I told you and so did the waitress, Tom.”

“Whatever,” he grumbled and flagged down the waitress to wrap up the pizza to take home. You and the waitress exchanged knowing looks when she picked up your plates, with Tom narrowing his eyes at you while he put his wallet on the table.

“Nuh-uh!” you protested and snatched his wallet off the table before he had time to react. “You’re not paying for lunch.”

Tom whined, holding his hand out to demand his wallet back from you. “Y/N! Give me back my wallet!” You shook your head and dropped his wallet into your purse, smiling at the waitress when she handed you the bill.

“Just let me pay for god’s sake, Tom and stop whining about it.”

“Thank you and have a nice day!” the waitress said when you paid the bill, clearing the rest of the table while you and Tom bid your good byes, leaving the restaurant.

“That was so rude of you,” he told you and you frowned, glancing at him.

“Why was that rude? 20% tip was more than enough.”

He rolled his eyes and wrapped an arm around your shoulder to pull you closer as you walked on the sidewalk with no particular destination in mind.

“I was talking about you taking my wallet when I was offering to pay for lunch, dummy.”

Pleased, you shrugged with your shoulders and glanced up at him with a smile. “Just because you’re loaded doesn’t mean I’m going to let you pay for everything, we’re in the 21st century.”

You could see him smirk out of the corner of your eye and smiled to yourself, leaning your head on his arm. The rest of the day was spent with showing Tom around the city you’ve grown to love since you’ve moved here for university. It wasn’t the biggest city, but it had some beautiful spots and was definitely charming. The good weather made a lot of people spend their days in the park or getting ice cream, but nevertheless you two managed to keep yourselves on the down-low.

After stopping at food truck for a quick dinner, you made your way back to your apartment. It wasn’t that late yet, but all the walking and the sun constantly shining down on your made you weary and tired.

“How was that petty of me?”

“I literally saw you grinning so hard when the old man told that woman off for standing directly in front of the subway door when it opened.”

Laughing, you pushed open the door of your apartment building, looking back at him, your eyes crinkling. “I hate it when people do that, so the woman had that coming.”

“That is literally the definition of petty, love.”

Heading up the stairs, you two continued squabbling and it felt good to be so carefree and light, especially because Tom made you feel like you were the only person left on the world. Throughout the day he had kept all his attention on you. You were pretty sure that he never even glanced at his phone for more than the five seconds he needed to take a picture. You wished for every day to be like this one.

But unfortunately, it couldn’t be.

And you were reminded of that fact in form of a well-dressed man standing in front of your apartment door, the sound of your laughter pulling his attention away from his phone to the two of you. Puzzled, you looked at him and Tom stopped in his tracks when he came up the stairs behind you.

“Jeff, what are you doing here?”

Jeff, you’ve heard that name before.

“You weren’t picking up your phone.”

“Yeah, because I’m not working right now,” Tom ground out and it dawned on you. Jeff, his agent. The same agent who he had an argument with before you left Los Angeles.

The man who was standing front of your door because Tom wasn’t answering his phone.

“Doesn’t mean you can ignore my calls Tom.”

Both men seemed annoyed and you eyed them carefully, pulling the key out of your purse. “Uhm, do you maybe want to come inside? I don’t think you want to talk about this where my neighbors could hear you, do you?”

“No, it’s fine, Y/N-“

“That would be perfect, thank you.” Jeff interrupted Tom and you pressed your lips together before unlocking the door, letting the two men step inside before closing the door.

“Uh, you can go into the living room,” you offered awkwardly and Jeff nodded curtly, waltzing through the doorway like he owned it.

Tom furrowed his brows when he looked at you, reaching out to squeeze your arm gently. “I am really sorry about this Y/N, I didn’t know that he was going to come here, honestly I don’t even know how he knew that I was here in the first place. But he’ll leave shortly, okay?”

You gave him a tight smile and nodded, following him to the living room where Jeff was sitting at the living room.

“Alright Jeff, get it out with,” Tom sighed, motioning for you to sit before he sat down next to you.

Jeff raised an eyebrow at you. “You think it’s appropriate for her to stay for the conversation?”

Wow.

“I can leave,” you said, standing up but Tom grabbed your hand, looking at you with pleading eyes, so you sat back down, folding your hands on the table.

“Her name is Y/N. And I’m not letting you scare her off in her own home,” he told his manager and Jeff leaned back in his chair, shrugging.

“Fine with me. I think Y/N is distracting you from your work and it’s not good.”

You blanched at his words and even though Jeff didn’t seem to like having you here for the conversation, it was certainly looking he was taking advantage of your presence.

“How is she distracting me when I’m not even working right now?” Tom asked, taking the cap off his head and tossing it on the table. There was an edge to his voice and you already knew at this point that this conversation was not going to be pleasant.

“You know that you’re always working, Tom. Right now you should be promoting Far From Home and urging your fans to be going to the theater to watch the film instead of strolling around the city,” Jeff spoke sharply, sending an icy look in your direction.

Holding your gaze as he stared you down, you didn’t even blink until he averted his eyes back to Tom. It wasn’t hard to tell that Jeff wasn’t overly fond of you.

“I did everything SONY has told me to do and more. You know I like staying close to my friends, have you even seen my Instagram posts?”

Jeff scoffed and opened the folder he was keeping under his arm. “I mean more like interviews and photoshoots with magazines. Do you even know how many people want you on their cover? This is your prime and you should take advantage of that.” He pointed at different high fashion brand names that were listed in his folder, seeming excited, but Tom only pinched the bridge of his nose.

“We already talked about this,” he groaned in annoyance. “Why do you keep bringing this up when you know that it’s my decision to make and that I don’t want to do it?”

Snapping the folder shut again, Jeff’s jaw ticked when he lifted his gaze to look at Tom before glancing at you. “You working another promotional method then?”

You felt uneasy, not liking the direction the conversation was taking.

“I am not sure if it’s working, though.”

“What are you talking about?” Tom asked, confusion written across his face.  

Jeff pointed at you. “I think fans like Zendaya better than Y/N so maybe you should get back to your colleague.”

“Excuse me?” You were appalled at the accusation and your cheeks tinted red, embarrassed, while Tom sported a similar redness to his face, though he wasn’t exactly flustered.

“Are you fucking serious right now Jeff?”

Even though you knew that Tom’s anger wasn’t directed at you, you still flinched his tone, but he quickly reached out to take your hand in his to calm you, and probably also yourself down, while his eyes were trained on his agent.

“Not only did you come here unannounced but now you’re also insulting Y/N, Zendaya and me at the same time? Even though she was so nice to invite you into her home instead of turning you away like she should have?”

“Tom-“ Jeff started, but Tom shook his head, cutting him off.

“No, Jeff, now it’s time for you to listen. You know how thankful I am for everything you’ve done for me but I am an adult and I can make my own decisions. And just because I owe a lot to you doesn’t mean you can go around acting like I’m working for you when it’s actually the other way around. The only reason why I’m not firing you right this second is that my mum actually went through a lot to hire you as my agent, so we’ll talk about this after my break,” Tom finished, standing up so quickly the chair almost toppled over hadn’t you grabbed it just in time.

Jeff was staring at Tom with wide eyes and even though he was quivering a bit, he got up as well, leaving without another word while Tom held the door open for him. Too bad Jeff didn’t take the tension with him when he left, because you didn’t dare to say a word when Tom returned to the living room, looking exhausted and tired.

“I’ll just head to bed if you don’t mind,” he said timidly and you nodded quickly.

“Yeah, of course, uh, you can go ahead and use the bathroom first.”

Tom gave you a small smile and trudged into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Taking a few deep breaths to compose yourself, you went to get changed. As you pulled your pajamas over your head, you heard the bathroom door open followed by footsteps, before another door shut close faintly. You peeked into the dark hallway and you could see a strip of light coming out below the door of your bedroom, before it flickered out.

Your heart was heavy at the sight, and after a quick visit to the bathroom, you climbed into Luisa’s bed, still shaken up about what just happened. Admittedly, Jeff was out of line coming at Tom and you like this, but you couldn’t help but wonder if you were really distracting Tom from his work, because that was the least thing you wanted to do. You tried to fall asleep, but your mind kept wandering back to Jeff and all the thing’s he’s said.

Minutes, maybe even hours passed.

Tossing around in the bed, unable to sleep, you glanced at the clock, sighing at the time it was showing. The blankets pushed back and legs swung of bed, you got up. Maybe a glass of milk would help.

Tiptoeing into the kitchen with the light from your phone guiding you, you poured yourself a glass of milk before drinking it quickly, sighing with the empty glass in your hand. Putting the milk back into the fridge, you returned to Luisa’s bedroom when you heard a clatter from within your own bedroom.

With narrowed eyebrows, you stopped in front of the door and knocked lightly, waiting for a few seconds before Tom opened the door for you.

He looked tired and his hair was messy, but he didn’t look like you had just pulled him out of a good night’s sleep.

“You okay?”

Tom nodded and ran his hand through his hair with a sigh. “Yeah, I just can’t sleep. Sorry if I woke you.”

You could tell that he was still aggravated and it didn’t take mind reading for you to know that it was about Jeff.

“You didn’t wake me. Can’t sleep either,” you told him and gave him a small smile, before rocking back and forth on the heels of your feet.

“Uhm, I’ll let you get back to bed. I’ll see you in the morning, yeah?”

You gave him a small wave and walked back to your bedroom.

“Y/N, wait,” Tom called out and you turned to him. “Do you, uh- Would you maybe like to sleep with me?”

He cringed, his cheeks pinking.

“I mean, in your bed. Share, I mean.”

Smiling dumbly, you nodded a yes and brushed past him into your bedroom, while he closed the door behind you. You quickly climbed into the bed and under the covers, leaving plenty of space on the other side of the bed for Tom.

Laying pin-straight on the mattress, a far cry from the usual starfish you usually did, and you let out a breath when he slipped beneath the blankets on the other side of the bed. A couple of minutes passed while you stared at the ceiling and you weren’t sure if Tom had already fallen asleep, but you inched your hand in his direction anyway.

It slowly crept across the mattress until your fingers grazed his hand and you stilled, holding your breath. You finally exhaled when he intertwined his fingers with yours and a smile spread on your face, before you rolled over to your side, just to see him mere inches away from your nose.

“Hi,” you whispered and he smiled at you, reaching out to stroke the hair out of your face.

“Hi,” he mumbled back, staring at you with soft eyes before he spoke up again.

“I am sorry about Jeff. He was out of line and he never should have come here. I’ll deal with him as soon as I get back to work, I promise.”

Frowning, you squeezed his hand tightly.

“You don’t have to apologize on his behalf, Tom.”

The crinkles in his forehead were deep and it was clear to you that he might be even more upset about his agent’s behavior towards you than you were.

“Yes I do, he’s my agent and if it weren’t for me, he never would have been so rude to you.” He said quietly and scooted closer to him, leaning your forehead against his.

“Jeff is his own person and he makes his own decisions, just like you are your own person, remember? He made his decision to be rude so it’s him who should apologize to me, not you. You didn’t do anything wrong, you have to understand that,” you told him and he smiled at you, placing a soft kiss on your nose.

His voice was quiet, but still gentle when he said: “Thank you Y/N.”

“’course,” you whispered, snuggling closer to him and he wrapped his arms around you, as the two of you slowly fell into a deep slumber in each other’s arms.

There was a certain weight around your shoulders when you woke up slowly, your nose pressed against something warm. Your eyes fluttered open when you realized your face was smushed into Tom’s chest and with a dopey smile, you closed your eyes again. You weren’t sure what it was that woke you, when a phone pinged again and then again and again. It sounded like it was coming from both sides of the room.

“Tom it’s your phone,” you grumbled and he groaned, rolling over to check his phone while you checked yours.

It was a bunch of messages from all of your friends and a few from the twins and Harrison, and what seemed like a thousand of new instagram followers, and as you opened Luisa’s text, you heard Tom mutter a quiet:

“Oh fuck.”

Luisa: GIRL YOU’RE IN THE TABLOIDS????

Luisa: [picture attached] MASKS OFF! Tom Holland swings out of London to meet his real-life Mary Jane and it’s not Zendaya! Swipe up to read more!

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[snkpolls]

SnK S3E21 Poll Results (Manga Reader Version)

The poll closed with 260 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results of the manga reader poll. Anime only watchers are suggested not to read if you do not wish to be spoiled about certain events! Anime only viewers, click here to view your poll results!

RATE THE EPISODE 251 Responses

As usual, the episode received good ratings! A small minority could have been more impressed, but overall people were happy.

It was great, another 10/10 episode. My only gripe is that they should've cut the opening this time as well to have more time to put some great dialogues from the manga.

A bit bummed that quite a bit of lines from the manga didn't make it into the episode, but otherwise pretty damn good. 

Great one, though not as great as the previous one.

Some shots were not 1 to 1 to the manga, which was a bit sad, but overall the episode was amazing!

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS THE MOST IMPRESSIONABLE MOMENT? 255 Responses

Kruger bringing up Armin and Mikasa to Grisha was voted as the most notable scene from this episode. Behind that at 18.4% was the “Attack Titan” name drop moment. Kruger encouraging Grisha to carry out his mission came at a distant third with only 5.7% of the vote.

Everyone joking about Eren’s phase was hilarious. The lampshading of generic anime protag behaviour was great.

The end gave me c h i l l s. I loved how the outro started playing in the last little bits of krugers and grishas conversation and how the outro imagery was changed to  titan history images instead. That whole scene was such a pleasant surprise.

KRUGER SAID EVIL AND GOOD PEOPLE ONLY EXIST IF THAT’S WHAT THEY ARE CALLED. DO YOU BELIEVE THIS? 253 Responses

Just over half of respondents believe that “good” and “evil” are typically subjective terms, although there are a few who are objectively one or the other. 40.7% feel that “good” and “evil” are always subjective no matter what. A small 7.1% feel that “good” and “evil” are entirely objective with no room for argument.

Kruger's "you can be a god or demon depending on what you claim" is maybe the most overrated line in the story. He's musing on the fallibility of historical narrative and the ease with which people are deceived and made ignorant, not making some grand statement that there is no real morality.

DO YOU THINK GRISHA WAS THE RIGHT CHOICE FOR KRUGER TO ENTRUST THE TITAN POWER? 254 Responses

The vast majority of respondents feel that Grisha was a suitable successor of the Attack Titan after Kruger, while 18.5% aren’t certain he was the right choice.

WHAT IS THE BEST NAME FOR EREN’S TITAN? 255 Responses

69% percent (lol) of respondents prefer the official English name, “Attack Titan.” 18.8% prefer the literal translation of “Shingeki no Kyojin” as “Advancing Titan.” A few fans still prefer Eren’s long-time fandom label as the “Rogue Titan.” A few write-ins also had some fun takes:

American Titan, because he loves Freedom

Bedhead Titan

F R E E D O M TITAN

Crotchless sex on legs.

Elfian Titan / Elf Titan

Attacking Titan

Grisha, this titan has a name, it is Best Ass Titan.

WHAT ARE PATHS? 254 Responses

What are paths though? Like seriously? Okay, but seriously, 35.4% of respondents feel that they are metaphysical threads of fate. Closely behind at 32.7%, people are simply just confused and still can’t wrap their head around the concept of paths. 25.2% believe that paths are like an invisible highway between time periods. What are paths really, though?

As a manga reader i still don't get what paths are

By Ymir and the walls, every time I think I understand or at least accept paths something comes out of left field and leaves me shooketh.

PATHS IS NOT A SPOILER ANYMORE!!

EREN KRUGER MENTIONED MIKASA AND ARMIN WHEN HE WAS TALKING TO GRISHA - HOW DID HE KNOW THEIR NAMES? 254 Responses

42.9% of respondents feel it can only be explained as paths connecting all Eldians like a thread of fate, something unexplainable. 33.5% believe that Kruger simply tapped into the memories of either Grisha or Eren. 14.6% think that Eren sent this message back in time to Kruger. 

I think its a message passed down through the Attack Titan

Eren confused his own thoughts with the memories

I was always thinking it was someone else talking to Eren and as Eren did something, the memories were sent backwards

The Attack Titan keeps moving forward. It can glimpse further down the line into the fourth dimension.

I don't know, hopefully Isayama will explain this one day.

I noticed during this episode that Kruger looks just like Grisha as both a child and an adult. Perhaps he... is Grisha?

This conversation is a flashback alright ? Then, it’s only Eren’s wish interfering with the flashback. It’s actually Eren’s actual mind which is deforming the thing

If the theory of the time loop is real, maybe that's how the message kinda got sent, similarly how Eren got glimpses of his future when he was a kid. Maybe they've been doing this for so long now that they've tried to send messages through time so that they know what needs to be done.

Kruger was speaking as Grisha, which means he was experiencing Grisha's memory

it's the time loop guys

I have always assumed Eren's memories were mixed up with Grisha's, which is why he'd “remember" Kruger mentioning Armin & Mikasa's names, but now I'm not sure. Maybe "PATHS" really make memories a two way street.

KRUGER SAYS IN ORDER TO STOP THEIR CURSED HISTORY FROM REPEATING, GRISHA MUST LEARN TO LOVE SOMEONE. DO YOU THINK THIS COULD BE GENERAL ADVICE FOR THE REST OF HUMANITY? 253 Responses

We had an almost-tie here, but 43.9% took the lead, with respondents feeling that “love” is a primary method for breaking a cycle of hatred, prejudice and despair. 43.1% feel that while “love” is a nice, flowery solution to the world’s problems, it’s just not that simple. 8.3% aren’t sure either way, and a small amount believe firmly that “love” isn’t a reasonable approach to solving the world’s issues.

NEXT WEEK IS THE FINAL EPISODE OF THIS SEASON - ARE YOU EXPECTING A TEASER FOR THE NEXT SEASON? 256 Responses

52.3% of viewers remain hopeful that we will have a season 4 teaser will happen at the end of the episode, solidifying another season of the anime. 38.7% are confident that a teaser will be present. A small percentage have less optimism.

HOW WELL DID THE EPISODE ADAPT THE CORRESPONDING MANGA CHAPTERS? 252 Responses

This episode didn’t get as many 5/5 rankings as most previous episodes did, with quite a bit of commentary about some of the things that were cut from the adaptation:

I missed the line where Kruger said Marleyans wouldn’t exist if the 1700 years ethnic cleansing really happened. 

Felt a bit rushed and they left quotes from Kruger out which I believe are important. 

They cut way too much of Kruger dialogue. They missed some of the things that made him such an interesting character.

This episode was good as always but I'm mad that they cut a lot from the Kruger and Grisha scene (mainly the mention of Grandpa Jaeger or how marley keep the eldians in the camp as weapons). Those aren't essential but important to add layers and complexify the plot. Kruger speech was what I was looking forward the most  this season…

The Kruger conversation was cut down too harshly imo

I was missing the scene where Kruger tells grisha that his father was a smart man & that he was just trying to prevent losing more of his family.

They decided to cut some of the most important dialogue pieces from this episode, like "a doctor to falsify his blood test”

Less rushed than the previous episode but I really hate how they cropped the entirety of Kruger's involvment. It makes him look like more of a plot device than in the manga: the implications he had an agenda with the restorationists, his view on good vs evil explained (unrealistic ethnic cleansing and unrealistic miracles), how he perceived Grandpa Yeager (a smart man who didn't want his last child to walk on the path to hell)...

The anime also omitted a couple of things: Kruger suspecting Marley would no longer have any use of Eldians in the internment zone if they get the Founder and the past of the Eldian Empire, saying they used titans as weapons of mass destruction. The last one is important as the anime is really biased towards EMA's side.

Some minor dialogue cuts but it's not nearly as bad as manga readers are making it out to be.

DO YOU THINK KRUGER SACRIFICING ELDIANS FOR VITAL INFORMATION IS COMPARABLE TO WHAT EREN MAY BE DOING NOW? 254 Responses

43.3% of manga readers feel that Eren and Kruger’s actions are comparable as necessary evils in order to reach a beneficial goal for everyone. 32.3% feel that while the actions are comparable, the goals may not be. 11.8% feel that there’s not enough evidence to say either way. 7.9% felt that the contexts for both characters are completely different and not comparable.

I think what Kruger.did was more cruel than what Eren is doing now

Need to know Eren’s actual plans tbh.

They both believe that their goal is ultimately right - although I wouldn't necessarily call it beneficial

GIVEN THE MANGA EVENTS, DO YOU BELIEVE EREN IS BEING INFLUENCED BY HIS TITAN’S MEMORIES? 256 Responses

Nearly 40% of respondents feel that Eren is influenced by the memories given to him through his titan part of the time. 32% feel that it is happening always, and 15.2% aren’t sure.

This episode wonder if the nine titans had wills and personalities of their own. It can’t be a coincidence that the Attack Titan always finds its way to Eldians who desire freedom. It also makes me wonder about the way Bertholdt addressed Armin and seemed way different than usual in rts. Mikasa thought that Bertholdt was acting like a different person than they’ve seen. I think the Colossal influenced that behavior and was anticipating a new holder. Perhaps the colossal titan is always in love with the Female Titan also, forcing its holders to have feelings for the female titan holder. Which might explain Armin’s strange behavior in other chapters. This is just rambling and the concept of paths are still confusing though.

Regarding the influence of Titans: I believe everyone is being influenced. Having the memories of a differet person, their experiences and feelings is an influence. Wether they are acting different because of these is a different story. But even then, the current holder is still the one who decides to act different, based on their (now gained) own experiences. It's therefore not different from people changing after going thorugh something horrible themselves. 'influenced' is mostly used as 'being controlled' by this fandom, which I think is simply wrong. So: Yes, he is influenced. No, he is not being controlled.

HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT HISTORIA SEEING YMIR’S BACKSTORY THROUGH PATHS? 256 Responses

33.2% of respondents feel that it was a reasonable way to recap Ymir’s story while also giving closure for her character, while 28.1% found that it only made the concept of paths come off as more confusing. 16.4% feel that this will be touched more on in future manga chapters. 12.1% disagree with WIT’s decision to put Ymir’s backstory in season 2, as opposed to here.

Historia being able to glimpse into Ymir's memories made perfect sense to me. She's done that before with Rod in a moment of emotions running high, so Royal Blood+contact with DNA+strong emotions might have a role. Beyond that, I'm sticking to my belief that paths can be compared to the fourth dimension in spacetime terms. 

I didn't really like the execution of Ymir's letter to Historia. The paths looked kinda cool but it's also a little out of place and just ??? The letter also kind of lost its value as well since it was cut short and seems like Ymir doesn't tell Historia anything about her past as well. Yikes

Did Ymir write the letter with her blood for Historia to see her past ????

The path scene with Historia and Ymir was odd: at the same time the anime isn't at its first when it comes to plot conveniences (sleep darts, berserk Eren), but it's also not the same time Historia got an influx of erased memories at random times (her playtime with Frieda)

I lost it when PATHS activated for Historia

WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT YMIR’S FATE BEING IMPLIED IN THE FLASHBACKS? 256 Responses

Nearly 45% of respondents feel that WIT did a good thing by placing the implications of Ymir’s death in this episode, rather than show it as an afternote during the Marley arc. 17.2% wish the scene would have been longer. 14.5% were simply hyped to see Porco’s silhouette. 

I hated how unclear Ymir’s death was. You really couldn’t tell she died without knowing from the manga, and in the manga, it was a really impactful character moment. It really showed how little Ymir cared for herself and submitted to Marley because of her guilt for eating Marcel by accident. 

I think Ymir's death should have been focused on a bit longer, because I saw ppl did not quite catch what happened. Then again, people don't seem to care much about her anyway :(

PORCO THO!!!!

WHICH SCENE FROM THE PREVIEW ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? 256 Responses

Unsurprisingly, the journey to the sea is the most anticipated moment of the next episode. There are a few who are looking forward to the moments that take place during the ceremony more, though. 

next episode, we will see Hitch again and I'm not ready for that. 

I'm honestly not looking forward anything in the next episode, all the really interesting stuff already happened

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

The pace are a bit weird, they skipped several parts but i think isn't the problem if anime onlies had critical thinking/observation. Overall it's good and i though porco inherited the jaw titan after the timeskip(because how the flashback played in manga) but the anime cleared it and his lifespan is same as armin. 

I noticed that Hanji had referred to Grisha as "Mr. Jaeger" and not Dr. Jaeger. 1) that just doesn't sound right to me. 2) is there any reason for that? I believe earlier in the series they had referred to him as Dr. Jaeger, so why the change? 

Roses are red, PATHS are confusing, this episode was very amusing. Mina's best girl PEACE OUT

I want to hug eren. Both Anime!Eren and manga!Eren. 

I didnt particularly like the way they did the Attack Titan namedrop 

There were so many mistakes with the height of the characters this episode... What is WIT doing?

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 244 Responses

Thanks again to everyone who participated! We’ll see you back in a few days.

[ackackh]

WIP Meme

Rules: List all the things you’re currently working on in as much or little detail as you’d like, then tag some friends to see what they’re working on.

This can be writing, art, vids, gifsets - anything at all!

I was tagged by my darling @spoondragon, thank you, my guy!

I really need to talk to you guys about some of these and make sure they make it to ao3! Turns out school and my job have taken up most of my valuable writing time, so these are all slow coming, but they’ll get there!

okay let me pick the biggest ones atm…

1. My PBB which is currently titled SPACE BOYS

okay so since I haven’t talked about this in a million years, here’s the gist. Sometime far in the future, Earth’s sun has died (the science behind this is closer to if the sun just disappeared, rather than totally obliterating the planet) and most humans left and found a new planet, but some stayed. Now, Eugene Sledge is a part of a crew of five (Andy, Eddie, Bill, and Sidney) tasked with going back to Earth to see wtf happened to it.

the story begins here, the crew comes to Earth expecting a barren wasteland and instead finds… Snafu. Well, they find a huge colony of people who live inside this protective structure and underground.

Eugene meets K co, Sidney meets H co, and Andy and Eddie meet something of a surprise (read to find out, ooooh). There is science (so much nerding, I’m sorry I couldn’t help myself), culture comparison, angst, falling in love with someone you thought was an ass, grief, heartache, found-families, and a decent dose of existentialism.

There is so much to this au guys, I think the hardest part is that I’ve thought of enough to fill a novel and that’s… a lot to write. I’ll also have a playlist for this for ultimate ~~vibes~~

2. My Baseball AU! (most likely to be titled Hartford Eagles)

okay okay, this au has been painstakingly outlined, chapter by chapter, it is seriously just down to writing it, but writing takes so much tiiiime! No matter what tho, I’m in love with this story.

So easy co is a (very fictional) MiLB team called the Hartford Eagles and they have just taken on the first lady to play with an all-male team in the minors, Renee Lemaire! She’s a pitcher and she kicks ass, I’m so proud of my daughter.

baseball teams are like 25 people deep so I was able to include basically the entire co. Dick is the Manager, Nix the pitching coach, Harry the hitting coach, and Ron the conditioning coach. Buck is team captain, pretty predictable stuff there. I have an excel sheet with all the boys and their positions and jersey numbers, even their walk-up songs. 

okay so plot. The story takes place over one season and focuses on two main plots as well as five (5) romances, but not all of them are as in-depth as others. The first plot follows Renee during her first season with easy. Dick wanted her on the team not only because she’s stellar, but also because he knew his boys would treat her well. So she’s dealing with all the stress of paving the way for other women and having a successful season, but she’s also finding brothers in all the boys. I focus on a lot of different friendships in this, here she has the medic crew (mostly Gene and Spina) and she becomes really close with Toye and also Nix to a lesser extent. 

The other plot follows Joe Toye, their closer, who is gearing up to get into the majors. Lots of different teams are scouting him but nothing is set in stone when the story begins and, because Joe is Joe, he works his ass off to prove he’s worth it. He’s very close with Bill, becomes a big brother to Renee, and has a growing friendship with Luz, which may turn into something more, hmmm, read to find out!

there is lots of SPORTS! brotherhood, the ot5, slow burn that might kill me, love confessions, (so many) boys who don’t know how to express their feelings, CHUCK GRANT CONTENT, winning, losing, crying, singing, tragedy, and recovery.

bonus: references to Undrafted

3. Wintergaard

so I made a post about this a long time ago, but it’s developed a lot since then so let’s go. I basically accidentally outlined half a novel and there’s so many OCs I might die, but it’s a fantasy au.

I made an entire lore but we’ll skip that and check into the present. Dick is a Prince in a Kingdom (Wintergaard) that has four lines of kings. So four rulers share power equally among each other and Dick’s mother happens to be one of those rulers. He’s the youngest, birth order doesn’t matter as far as assuming the throne is concerned, but Dick is pretty unlikely to take the throne anyway b/c his brother is like the perfect candidate. besides, Dick doesn’t want it.

So he’s got a wonderful mother, a brother who’s kind of perfect tbh, and a sister who’s super kickass, like she became a captain and later becomes a commander in the royal army just because she wants to. 

And then there’s Dick. Who is great, obviously, but when he’s 18 he gets crowned (as is custom in this universe) with a crown meant to symbolize the soul, and his is really…soft. Feminine and sort of sweet. He was given the title The Gentle as a child and all of this adds up to lots of whispers and rumors. because like “uh…he could be in charge one day and he’s nOT MannLY??” but it’s w/e to Dick. He likes his crown a lot. 

Lots of time goes by, lots of OC drama, and turns out, whoops! there’s a civil war between the Kingdom and the citizens who live in its borderlands. (I’m not saying I put in heavy references to the Confederacy in here but.,,yah I absolutely did). In the very first battle Dick gets seriously injured and becomes MIA, later assumed dead.

But guess who’s not dead! Guess who gets found by some farmers who are looking for their brother! That’s right, Prince Richard the Gentle. So, Speirs’ father owned a farm and passed it to him and his brother (an OC) and Nix is Ron’s half-brother, a bastard son. Carwood worked for Speirs’ father and now works for Speirs. They’re super in love, don’t worry they’ll figure it out. 

So, Dick gets rescued by these strangers who know who he is b/c like,,, he’s royalty. He heals under their care, they all become very close, and eventually they all journey back to the capital so Dick can go home.

Well, a lot has changed since he’s been gone and shit’s only gonna get crazier. I’ll stop there, but I will say that soon after this, the gang runs into Shifty who is very important for… reasons. Not to worry, all will be revealed. 

Okay, so we got way to in-depth lore and history, royalty that’s actually kind of great, a civil war, lots of love, pain and injury, healing, angst, a journey, lots of magic, SHIFTY HAS A DAUGHTER, Winnix, Speirton, and Luztoye, familial bonding, important life-altering choices, and a meeting with the big man himself: Death. 

Sorry, I know this got way too long, I’m just excited to be writing these! Please let me know if you’d be interested in reading the first chapter of any of these, or some other kind of teaser! I’m starting to realize that I need feedback to write, lol

Uh, like everyone’s been tagged I think, lol. But I’ll go with @hoosiersblanket and @gingerwerk because I always love hearing about what they have cookin

[l0vegl0wsinthedark]

The Sexual Awakening of An Innocent Pureblood, Dating The Randy Prat Who Lived - Teaser

Sneak preview of this Friday’s episode - Harry really ought to have been more careful. Draco might have been a virgin until recently but he’s still a motherfucking Slytherin. Hope this suffices until @bixgirl1 posts the whole thing lol

Chapter 27: Never Push a Slytherin 

~Harrys house, later the same night~

Harry, stripping off his jumper in his bedroom as Draco comes out of the en suite, damp, with a towel around his waist: *hesitantly* So. Um. Tonight went really well. Molly and Arthur really liked you, and Arthur had that laptop broken in about five minutes flat, so… *off Draco’s icy silence* And I told you there wouldn’t be a problem if Ginny showed up, or with Hermione. *bites lip, watching as Draco stands before the mirror and charms his hair dry, mouth pressed into a tight line* *plaintive* Alright, I get it. You’re mad. You haven’t said a bloody word to me since we left Ron and Hermione’s. *sighs, coming up behind Draco to slide his hands over his hipbones and squeeze* *nuzzles his taut shoulder* I feel like you’re making the whole thing out to be worse than it was. They were fine with it; Ron’s just tactless sometimes.

Draco, pulling out of his embrace and walking away: *yanks open Harry’s wardrobe and tugs out a faded yellow t-shirt* *pulls it on, tugging off the towel and sending it floating back into the bathroom* *drags back the covers and gets in wordlessly, turning away from Harry and pointedly flicking his wand to turn the lights off*

Harry, blinking in the sudden darkness: So you’re not going to talk to me at all? *sighs heavily and wiggles out of his trousers* *climbs into bed; lays in brooding silence for a few moments* *smiles to himself and rolls onto his side, inching his fingertips up Draco’s thigh* I bet I could change your mind….

Draco, grabbing his hand and throwing it off him as he sits up with an enraged hiss: Do not touch me! *kicks the covers off violently and kneels there, glaring murderously at Harry in the darkness*

Harry, abruptly fed up: *snaps* Because you’ll actually go that long without letting me. *rakes an uneasy hand through his hair* Look. I’m sorry I got a bit detailed; I get that you’re embarrassed that I described how your arse felt or whatever. Only it wasn’t locker room talk; I needed some advice. But it was months ago, Draco.

Draco, shaking with fury: Oh, because that makes it perfectly fucking okay to– *jumps out of bed, utterly menacing despite being half naked* *nearly screaming* You actually think this is no big deal, don’t you?! You genuinely are under the impression that it doesn’t matter at all that you humiliated me to your friends - probably laughed at me–

Harry, drawing back: *appalled* I didn’t! Jesus, Draco, we didn’t! Babe, no one laughed at you–except Ron, but that was all tonight, it’s how we tease each other; he just didn’t know it would be something that upset you. *climbs out of bed and cautiously pulls a stiff, resistant Draco into his arms* *kisses his unresponsive mouth; deeper when his lips move grudgingly* *pulls back* I mean it. There was no laughing. I- I’m really sorry… *slides the hands down from his waist to stroke the curve of his arse*

Draco, cold but not pulling away: *murmuring* Yes, I’m sure you are… *remains impassive when Harry smiles but kisses him back this time, biting a little too sharply at his mouth* *pulling back sharply, jaw clenched* *plants a hand on Harry’s chest and shoves hard, ignoring Harry’s yelp of shock as he lands on the bed but scrambles back onto his knees* *softly, dangerously* On your back. *when Harry opens his mouth to respond* Keep that mouth shut and lie on your back. Now.