#Patton really awesome

[keter-class-anomaly]

I recreated the cover for remus's theme!

...with a couple little changes of course!

i'm REALLY happy with how this turned out!

i can't wait to hang it up on my wall when i get home TvT

just the line art:

they look better irl lol

[lovecorepatton]

i hope patton is ok forever. she deserves it

[explodingegg123]

can anyone send me any mike patton related asks

[lovelylogans]

the parent trap

the masterpost

“So,” Remus says slowly. “If your Dad is my Dad…”

“...and your Pa is my Papa…”

Remus stares at the seam of the wedding photo, made whole again after more than a decade. His Pa, Patton, familiar with his cowboy-handsome, weather-beaten face and his dimpled grin and his big, calloused hand resting over his new husband’s, even if Remus has never seen him look this smitten ever. 

“And we’re both born on October 11… then, Roman. You and I are… like… brothers.”

And his Dad—Janus—smiling coyly, handsome in the way of magazine models, so completely a stranger to Remus with just this scrap of a photograph to serve as any way to know him, really know him. The way Roman knows him. The way Remus has been dying to know him all his life.

“Remus,” Roman breathes out, disbelieving. “We aren’t just brothers. We’re twins.”

Remus wonders, in a daze, if seeing the opposite life he could have had is as strange for Roman as it is for him… if they’d just been switched at birth, it’s the life Remus could have had, knowing his Dad instead of his Pa, but then…

But then it clicks.

“Roman,” he says, turning to grin at his brother—his brother! “I have a completely perfect, totally awesome idea!”

or: it's a parent trap AU for @tss-storytime with fanart by @tastic-in-its-finest!

warnings: pranks and practical jokes, smoking, drinking, brief mentions of underage drinking (in the context of a child trying a sip of wine), sibling rivalry and bonding, please let me know if i've missed any!

pairings: janus/patton, logan/virgil, brief patton/male oc

word count: 80k

notes: a few notes before we begin: first, thanks so much to morgan for their fanart for this fic!!! it's so cute, please like and reblog and do all that fun stuff!!! second, thanks to the folks over at the big bang for organizing this whole event—i know firsthand how complicated that can get, and you are so appreciated!!! this is technically a '90s au, but a '90s au in terms of the fashion and lack of social media/cell phones, not any of the homophobia. i hope you all enjoy!!!!

chapter one: prologue Across the world from each other, two very different families help two very similar boys pack their bags.

chapter two: welcome to camp walden! Welcome to what we like to think of as the most beautiful spot on God's green earth—Camp Walden.

chapter three: en garde The boys come to blows. (With practice épées, but in their minds, it’s equally as serious.)

chapter four: riposte The boys come to blows. (With words and stitching.)

chapter five: black card The boys come to blows. (With a temporary reversal of gravity, oodles of chocolate sauce, and finally, some semblance of adult interference.)

chapter six: isolation station The boys spend a great deal of their time considering coming to blows. Until suddenly, they don’t want to fight at all anymore.

chapter seven: operation augustus The realization of having an identical twin does quite a bit to spur some out-of-the-box levels of creativity.

chapter eight: let's get down to business! The boys begin to plot. Camp Walden trembles in fear.

chapter nine: to defeat… the family civil divisions of napa and london respectively! The boys plot. The world all over ought to be trembling in fear.

chapter ten: domine dirige nos Remus spends a great deal of time weighing the most British way to say hello. He’s going to have to repress throwing in a what’s all this then, guv’nor? the entire time.

chapter eleven: eureka! Roman spends a great deal of time weighing the most American way to say hello. He thinks he probably shouldn’t come right out of the gate with howdy, y’all!

chapter twelve: a wench in the works This absolutely was not in their multitude of blueprints!

chapter thirteen: riding is magic and friendship is power and love is everything to everyone Roman gets to meet his pony. He should, by all rights, be much more excited about it, but someone had to go and ruin it for him.

chapter fourteen: in which virgil attempts to hold a poker face (and fails miserably) Virgil curses being so observant.

chapter fifteen: all of my change spent on you Remus has a particularly fun run-in. Well. Fun for him.

chapter sixteen: so your sons have swapped places and are in foreign countries This particular subject was not covered in the parenting books.

chapter seventeen: hopped off the plane at lax with a dream of civil reconciliation with my ex-husband Remus plots. Grandfather aids and abets. Janus panics. Logan suffers them all.

chapter eighteen: small world and getting smaller Janus is officially the father of the two most troublesome twins in the galaxy.

chapter nineteen: you got me tripping, stumbling! sinking, fumbling! Patton makes a splash.

chapter twenty: the queen elizabeth the second the second The twins attempt to revive the past. The parents wish to change it.

chapter twenty-one: i said a boom chicka boom! Logan’s swept off his feet. As is Maddox, in an entirely different way.

chapter twenty-two: i said a boom GO TO YOUR ROOM The twins’ plots bear oh-so-satisfying fruit.

chapter twenty-three: where dreams have no end A hello, a goodbye.

chapter twenty-four: the concorde(ance) A goodbye, a hello.

chapter twenty-five: epilogue Two very similar boys help their two very different families assimilate into one.

[prodigal-explorer]

cant send this on anon. sad! anyways i think the point of pattons arc is to accept that the others have importance. learning to not bottle up his feelings was the first step to fixing a larger issue about himself, that being that he tries to put all responsibility of himself. and that manifests in a lot of ways, including not respecting the others and their roles.

but then you get to the end of pof, and after janus resigns to being wrong about everything, patton says that they both know that's not true. that to me signifies that something shifted in him after pof. thats him directly recognizing that janus was right. that selfishness was the right choice, that janus is important. and this is a direct consequence of janus pointing out his flaws to him (when he turns back into a human he admits that he doesn't know what hes doing and he cant pretend that he does anymore. which is a direct response to when he resolves to make sure thomas isnt a bad person in svs)

does that mean he's good at it? no. not at all. but i do think hes trying. given that hes already had a major breakdown in a video i cant see the same happening for the finale but he should definitely take time to acknowledge the others roles. maybe he can talk logan/orange down and tell him that the rage he feels is justified and important to thomas? something like that. i would love it if remus got a chance to be involved but i have the bad feeling hes gonna be the designated one dimensional comedic relief. which i kinda get why but also come the fuck on. anyways thats my two cents idk

i completely agree with you homie!!!

i also appreciate the nuance in this take cuz so many people fly to my askbox and try to tell me that patton is some innocent baby and that he should never be criticized ever because "he's trying!" and that's not what you did you actually spoke like with intelligence which was so fucking awesome to read. /g

i absolutely agree with everything you said. this is patton's arc. his arc isn't "i'm too nice and i need to stop being too nice" HELL NO that's not his arc whatsoever and there is no indication of that being his arc even though people constantly pretend that's his arc. NO. his arc is that he needs to learn that he is not the end-all-be-all of thomas' mind, and that he is not always the most important voice in the conversation. though he doesn't have overstated hubris, how highly he thinks of himself and how lowly he thinks of the others is blatantly obvious through his actions, and he's slowly getting better at, like, NOT doing that and it's really good change to see! he still has a...long...long...LONG way to go, but at least he's going somewhere. i just wish people would acknowledge this super interesting journey instead of watering patton down and being super fucking annoying whenever i try to critique him the tiniest bit.

[dominustempori]

SPOILER ALERT FOR THE GHOSTBUSTERS: FROZEN EMPIRE TRAILER!! (long post, fyi)

Alright Ghostheads, I'm writing all this down now, so I won't forget all these thoughts and observations I'm having JUST a few hours after this awesome teaser for the "Afterlife sequel" has dropped.

I'm sure I'm missing some bits here, so comments are duly welcome, just don't go all negative energy on me =)

Definitely felt a similar vibe to when the first trailer for "Afterlife" came out like 2 years ago now. Normal summer day, good background music, then...sh*t happens. Even worse than that burst of PK energy from the mine shaft. And yeah, I saw bits of "Day After Tomorrow," I'd be lying if I didn't get JUST a little hint of that, but only because, you know, massive storm system overwhelming the south shore of Manhattan. But anyway.

2. I SWEAR that one building shot from the side is 55 Central Park West, aka Spook Central. Probably not significant plot wise this time, just a nod to the original movie. And considering I toured some of the filming sites on my trip to NYC this past summer, SURE looks like it!

3. Deadly icicles ripping up the streets? Like the earthquake tearing up the asphalt in the original movie only BETTER!

4. The discourse is already happening about details...I know some people like Ecto 1-A from GB2, and some fans are still angry about "they ignored it in Afterlife! It's so canon! WTF Jason Reitman?" Yeah...missing the point? [They're not DELIBERATELY ignoring GB2! I LIKED GB2! A lot! Not perfect but still I LIKE IT! Probably a lot more than other fans! The film only had so much time to focus on the past to keep the story moving, so only put in so much of the lore to help a new audience along. That's my theory I'm sticking to it.]

ANYWAY...yes the car IS the original Ecto 1, NOT the 1-A (which was WAY too busy for its own good, just sayin'). I saw the plate on a freeze frame, it's Ecto 1, the original.

5. Enter the exposition cut scenes. or whatever you want to call them. Swear to God that Patton Oswalt, Kumail Nanjiani, Dan, McKenna, and Logan are NOT at Ray's Occult Books...I mean come on look at those glass cases! It's GOTTA be the NY Public Library (throwback!) Patton's character is most likely a staff member, probably a librarian (related to Alice? God I hope so!) [GBs do their research yo! If that's one thing I love about the IDW comics, is how Ray and Egon and Kylie RESEARCH.]

That one bit with the frozen dude with the eyepatch? Looks like a flashback. Like, maybe Manhattan in the...late 1800s? Recurring hauntings is def a thing in the GB universe. Another secret society? Which, yeah, they did to death (sorry) with the Gozer thing, especially in the video game.

6. Liking all the concerned closeups. Paul Rudd still looking good, and I REALLY hope Carrie Coon as Callie has full on dropped the baggage about not having her Dad in her life. Well, mostly. Turned me off from her QUITE a bit in Afterlife, but that's just me. Finn's hair lookin' good short, love how McKenna still rocks the OshKosh look, and Logan with the retro vibe.

7. James Acaster HAS TO BE an adult Oscar. I WILL fight people on this =) Not Louis' kid, not Janine's... (well, maybe?) Peter and Dana are OFFICIALLY still a couple, what's to stop Peter from adopting the boy he saved in GB2? Or at least, maybe they have their own kid later on...? Damn I hope he's Oscar. I mean come on, this is still "Ghostbusters: the Next Generation" in my mind.

8. HAUNTED LION STATUE!!! (Yeah, that's right from Real Ghostbusters...kinda) It's the Library! And on another freeze frame...it's going after Ray (GASP!) That little elevator? Maybe they're going to...Special Collections? Remember the video game? Maybe? Squee?

9. DUDE, it's attacking GBHQ! Blew the freakin' doors off! It's gonna...NO NOT LUCKY! Dude she (they?) is getting the short end of the stick again...first she gets possessed by Zuul and now...please don't kill off Lucky, Gil! Also OGBs FTW!!! yeah Winston! bad ass mf as always! And man does Pete look proper scared. Go Bill Murray!

10. I'm presuming that the big bad/entity was originally trapped and stored in the ECU, hence the blinking red light in the post credits scene from Afterlife. And it's whatever's pushing out the cinder blocks this time around...and freezing Lucky in the basement of HQ? And it's the...thing pushing its demon horns in...(so far others are calling it a minotaur - totally NOT. this guy is so reaching, i mean an old obscure RGB comic reference from a wiki page? dude, just...no. a cross between a White Walker and Slenderman? yeah THOSE I get. I'm personally thinking some ancient demon from a summoning gone wrong...or maybe right in this case.) any case, DUDE with those icy blue staring eyes and 20 feet tall...f*ck yeah.

11. Also F*CK yeah Paul and Carrie in the jumpsuits! YES!!!

12. Alright, I can sort of buy a hidden room in Kumail's character's (presumably?) apartment, secret door at the back of a kitchen pantry with some pretty lead/silver tiling...but, what's with the horn? (SUMMONING HORN! Read the Bartimaeus Trilogy people!) and the shackles? the bells? well, yeah noise to drive away evil spirits...or not? again... SECRET SOCIETY! Or maybe Lucky and Trevor have their own place now? Nah, maybe not...wait and see I guess.

13. Dude...Paul Rudd is TALL, boy! Would like to see if they've actually gone and married...or, too soon? Nah, romantic/life partners is good.

14. I WANT THAT RED WINTER JACKET WITH THE PATCH! SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!

15. Also, Paul's reaction...SO my own after watching this. He is still fanboy-ing out and I LOVE IT.

Holy hell that was a long post. First genuine reactions on the day. Online journaling. All good.

OK peeps, let me have it. What are y'all thinking?

Until March 29!

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Into the Snake's Den

----

Things going missing in a household of four wasn’t uncommon, really. It was normal enough to misplace a sock on laundry day, or get one of your shirts mixed up with someone else’s and never see it again, or misplace one piece of jewellery from a set. Losing things was not out of the ordinary, what was out of the ordinary was just how often it happened for this particular household.

Logan theorised they potentially had borrowers, and if that was the case Patton was content to let them stay, though Roman had always brought up the point that who - or what - ever the culprit was, it was stealing items much too large to be a borrower. Patton had offered the idea that perhaps it was a fairy, or a spirit who lived nearby, in which case the group was even more eager to drop the issue.

That was until something important went missing a few weeks later.

----

| Ao3 |

Warnings: None as far as I'm aware

Pairings: LAMP, DLAMP

Word Count: 4548

Notes:

I wrote this entire thing in one setting with encouragement from some awesome folks in the big bang server - I love you guys, lol.

Honestly, naga!janus in a non-explicit fic is so underrated - I think there really needs to be more snakey cuddles when the opportunity is so perfect, lol.

----

“Hey Pat - have you seen my cloak?” Came Virgil’s voice, sounding loudly through the house.

“No, bud, I haven’t seen it!” Patton yelled back as he worked on dinner, “Have you checked with Roman? I know he likes to borrow it sometimes-?”

His voice got quieter as Virgil actually joined him in the kitchen.

“I’ve already asked him,” He said, “Thought you might’ve washed it or something without telling me.”

“Nope… laundry day is tomorrow.” Patton shrugged and Virgil groaned. 

“Not again… that was my favourite cloak…” He mumbled, rubbing his face as he practically collapsed into the comfortable sofa next to Logan, who was reading a book on spells. 

Things going missing in a household of four wasn’t uncommon, really. It was normal enough to misplace a sock on laundry day, or get one of your shirts mixed up with someone else’s and never see it again, or misplace one piece of jewellery from a set. Losing things was not out of the ordinary, what was out of the ordinary was just how often it happened for this particular household. 

For the most part, it was things that weren’t really missed. Small things that didn’t matter all that much - little trinkets, an inexpensive belonging, usually something replaceable but personal. Sometimes it was more valuable items, jewellery - stolen especially from Roman and Virgil, who wore it most often - Art supplies from Patton or magical ingredients from Logan. 

Less often, but still notably more often than would be considered normal, bigger things went missing. Items of clothing, blankets from their beds, even pillows, occasionally. Other belongings - occasionally personal things too - would go missing too and Patton would find that a portion of whatever he had cooked would go missing as if by magic when he turned his back enough that he had started simply making extra. This had all started about a year ago, too, which leant more to the idea that this was suspicious. 

Today, it seemed, Virgil’s cloak had been taken. Patton could only assure him that they would get him a new one next time they went to the market. Nothing that had been taken had ever been returned. 

Logan theorised they potentially had borrowers, and if that was the case Patton was content to let them stay, though Roman had always brought up the point that who - or what - ever the culprit was, it was stealing items much too large to be a borrower. Patton had offered the idea that perhaps it was a fairy, or a spirit who lived nearby, in which case the group was even more eager to drop the issue. 

That was until something important went missing a few weeks later.  

—-

“Something’s not right,” Virgil hissed as he shook Logan awake one night.  Logan immediately got up, striking a match to light the candle on his nightstand and looking at Virgil - who’s eyes looked black in the dark. 

“What is it?”

“I don’t know, something’s wrong, I feel it,” He whispered, following Logan as he stood. The others had learned early on in their relationship that Virgil’s intuition was incredibly good; when he said something wasn’t right, he was almost always correct.

Glancing around as Logan paused to think, Logan’s eyes settled on a charcoal drawing that Roman had done of the four of them he kept in a frame, “Have you checked on the others?”

“Yeah - they’re both sleeping,” That was protocol, when Virgil felt that something was off in this way - he’d check on them first. 

“Alright, that’s promising - come on, we’ll check the casting room first.” Logan said. It was most likely that if something was wrong, that would be where it originated. A stray potion, a spilled pot of some ingredient messing with the aura of the place - not to mention Logan’s casting orb. 

The casting orb was a simple yet fairly rare magic tool - it allowed witches, like Logan, and other magic users - to store certain spells, keeping them constantly in place. The one Logan owned was mostly used to protect their home from any malevolent forces, there was one to grant them luck and it cast a generally positive magical aura that made it easier for all of them to perform their respective magic. 

When the pair entered the room, Virgil gasped. 

The door that led out to Patton’s greenhouse was wide open and from its glass case, the orb was missing. 

“Great,” Virgil said sarcastically. 

“We have to get it back,” Logan said immediately, “Not only is it incredibly valuable and dangerous in the wrong hands, but it is essential to keeping the others safe.”

Virgil’s expression twisted into a frown, “How are we gonna do that? We don’t even know what took it.”

“I’ll - figure something out,” Logan said, already heading over to his bookshelf, “If you could wake up the others?”

—-

“What are we doing out here in the middle of nowhere at whatever time in the morning again?” Roman complained as he led them down a barely trodden forest path, cutting back branches with his shimmering sword - that also served as a torch to light their way. Virgil was wearing a spare cloak that Patton was also sheltering under, clinging to Virgil’s side as the shadows swirled around them. Logan held his softly glowing staff and read from a book as they walked. 

“Left here, Roman,” Logan said quickly, “Sharply - and we’re looking for the creature that has stolen my orb.”

“Couldn’t this have waited ‘tll the morning?” Roman asked, veering left and swinging his sword in front of him to cut back brambles and clear a makeshift path. 

Virgil huffed, “You know how important the orb is, Princey, don’t be stuck up about it.”

“I just need my beauty sleep- woah…” Roman’s voice trailed off.

“Yes, your highness,” Virgil says with an exaggerated eye roll, though he fell quiet as he came into line beside Roman. Patton squeaked and Virgil gently squeezed his shoulders.-  trying not to pay attention to how the spare cloak was so scratchy and wasn’t the right size. Logan sighed.

“The trail goes in there,” Logan said, which none of them wanted to hear. Roman audibly groaned, both Patton and Virgil tensed. 

“That’s a naga den, no doubt about it,” Roman said quietly, looking at the large, dark cave entrance that lay open wide before them. A warm draft came from inside. Virgil wouldn’t mind it so much if it weren't for the suspiciously bone shaped - sticks, they were definitely sticks, he just shouldn’t think about it too hard, and he should absolutely not mention that within Patton’s earshot, “How important didja say this orb was? Like - is it worth our lives?”

The book in Logan’s hands snapped closed and he placed it carefully into his bag, placing both hands onto his staff instead, “We will not die as long as we do not mess this up.”

“And how exactly do we do that, specs?” Virgil asked gruffly - because how the fuck were they supposed to deal with a naga? Sure they were all magic users, but they weren’t that powerful.

“Well… Nagas are possessive, dangerous creatures,” Logan says, “Though their main defences are their tails and fangs, so long as you avoid getting caught in its tail you should not get hurt, hopefully, it will be sleeping and we will be able to sneak in to get the orb.”

“Don’t they have the best sense of smell and hearing like… ever, though?” Virgil asked, still looking at the cave, “And other crazy magic?”

Patton shivered, “Would- would it already know we’re here?”

“Well- It hasn’t come out to fight us, so I presume not,” Logan says, trying to placate, “If we can keep our spells and attacks ranged, we should all be okay.”

A dramatic sigh came from Roman’s right, “If you’d said that when we were at the house I would have brought my bow.”

Virgil glared at him, “You can channel magic through your sword, idiot.”

“Yeah - but the arrows are better-”

“Stop-” Logan commanded, both of them fell silent, feeling suitably cowed, “Unless you want to wake it up?”

With a sheepish look, Roman looked at his feet, “Right, sorry L.”

“Patton, you have your potions?” Logan asks a moment of silence later. 

“Yep - they’re mostly healing, though, I also brought snacks.”

“Well - I suppose the healing will be useful just in case,” Logan sighed, “You and I will hang back, Virgil and Roman should go in first.”

“What- why?” Roman protests.

“Your spells need line of sight and aim, if we are ahead of you you will be heavily hindered, mine do not,” Logan said, Virgil raised an eyebrow and he sighed and continued, “You are also a heavy hitter, and your shadow teleportation ability will make it easier for you to dodge, especially in a shadowy cave, plus you can see better.”

Virgil sighs, but doesn’t say anything - that reasoning is pretty sound., he supposed. 

“Are we ready?”

—-

The cave was dark, but unlike Virgil had expected, it didn’t necessarily smell bad, nor was it super damp - though it was a little humid, he supposed a naga would enjoy that.  The tunnel into the cave was fairly long, enough to make Virgil more and more nervous as they slowly and near silently traversed it, their path only lit by Roman’s sword. Something on the ground caught his eye and made him stop, Patton almost walked into him and whispered a quick ‘are you alright’ to him as Virgil bent down to pick it up. 

“Ro,” he whispered, “Light?”

Roman moved his sword closer to the thing Virgil had picked up, a small purple gemstone on a hooked wire, “I swear that’s familiar,” Roman whispered. 

“It’s my earring,” Virgil says as they continue to look at it, “The one I lost like a month ago?”

“Does that mean…” Patton whispered, before Logan nudged them both and put a finger to his lips, before pointing ahead of them. 

“Oh..” Roman whispered. A short ways ahead of them seemed to be the entrance to a much larger chamber, from which warm light seemed to spill into the tunnel. The four of them exchanged glances. Virgil especially shivered looking at it, that didn’t look like a particularly shadowy cave to him. “hm- before we go in, just in case we don’t come out.”

Logan tried to protest against Roman’s volume before he was pulled into a gentle kiss.  When he pulled away, Logan had a fond look on his face. Meanwhile Roman turned to Virgil and then Patton and did the same thing. 

That felt far too much like a goodbye. 

“Roman-” Virgil whispered before Roman was striding towards the chamber entrance, Logan reaches to grab him and pull him back but misses the back of his shirt by an inch. Virgil glances back at the other two and hurries after him, not about to let Roman be a self-sacrificing idiot for their sake. 

—-

When Roman reached the entrance of the chamber, he wasn’t sure what he was expecting and stopped short, rather than rushing in as planned. 

A naga, of course, and that’s what he saw, but he’d expected an intimidating, hissing creature, with coils and coils of tail ready to strangle or crush them, hissing with fangs ready to paralyse them with venom, he’d expected something dark and uncomfortable, not…

“Is that my shirt?” He asked dumbly to noone, only for Virgil to punch him in the arm for speaking so loudly, he turned to pout at him briefly before looking back at the scene before him. 

There was a naga, sure, and he was a little intimidating just for that fact, but really… Roman couldn’t force himself to be scared when he tried. 

He did have a mass of scaly tail that Roman was certain was strong enough to crush his bones, but right now it was coiled up and half buried in blankets he recognised, blankets, sheets, clothes and pillows that had been periodically going missing from their house. The naga’s tail was covered in shimmering gold and black scales, the gold glittering in the gentle light that filtered into the cave via some kind of magic and the black was iridescent. His torso too was a golden tan, flecked with the same shimmering yellow scales as his tail almost like freckles and cascades of soft looking warm brown hair obscured half of his face. 

In the naga’s arms was another pillow, though this one was dressed in what Roman was certain was one of his shirts that had gone missing fairly recently, his forked tongue was half out in his sleep in a frankly adorable ‘blep’. Roman found he could fathom fighting this creature less and less with every little detail he noticed. 

“This is…” Virgil whispered next to him. 

“Everything we’ve lost,” Patton finished, nodding. 

“But why?” Logan asked quietly, ever curious. Roman nodded, unable to help agreeing with the question - why did the naga want their things? Was this weird? Maybe a little, Roman thought it was almost cute. 

Roman turned his gaze to Logan as he seemed to scan the room, before his eyes settled on something, “The orb,” he whispered, pointing, “It’s over there.”

Right, that’s what they were here for, Logan’s orb. Roman followed his gaze to a small pile of trinkets across the room - all Logan’s things. His gaze slid to the other piles  scattered around, there was one for each of them. 

“I’ll get it,” Roman said eventually, already going to step forward before Virgil put his hand on his arm. 

A twisted, anxious expression was on his face and Virgil looked like he would rather be doing anything else right now, but he still said, “No - let me - I’m quieter.”

“Maybe,” Roman says softly, “But you don’t want to.”

“I don’t want you to be killed either-”

“I can take care of myself, V, it’ll be okay,” 

Patton shushed them hurriedly and the four of them turned to look at the naga, who murmured something and hugged the pillow closer whilst his tongue flicked out against it to smell the air, though he seemed to still be asleep. Logan seemed to realise something.

“This room is full of our scents already,” Logan whispered, drawing the attention of the other three, “It might not even notice we’re here - but we should still hurry, just-  do rock paper scissors if you have to.”

Roman turned to Virgil with a grin and held out his fist, Virgil rolled his eyes like this was a stupid idea but joined him in the game anyway. Roman won. He barely resisted crying out in victory, but he did punch Virgil affectionately before he smiled at the others and began making his way slowly around the edge of the chamber. 

Halfway there, the naga stirred again, but simply nuzzled into the pillow with a yawn that showed off his massive fangs, the mass of tail shifted, but he still didn't wake up. Roman put even more effort into being quiet until he reached Logan’s pile, picking up the shimmering orb carefully with both hands. He made eye contact with Logan before throwing it across the room. He almost laughed at the panic in Logan’s eyes as he casted a levitation spell on the small ball and brought it slowly back to himself, placing it carefully into the bag. Logan glared at Roman, who shrugged and took a step to make his way back. Having been looking at Logan, though, and not his feet, Roman found himself accidentally stepping on something that cracked under his foot. Loudly.

A wave of panic washed over him as the naga’s pointed ears pricked and he woke, this time his eyes blink open slowly and his gaze immediately locked onto Roman - he can’t help but think what striking colours they are. One is a striking gold, just like his scales, the other is almost black, but shimmering with an iridescent rainbow. Roman thought he ought to be worried about how he was about to die as the naga tasted the air, but he was frozen on the spot. Barely a glance at his lovers showed that they were terrified as well. 

For a moment, he and the naga simply stared at each other and he mentally begged the others to run. In a blink, and that’s really how fast it was - Roman couldn’t have possibly reacted - the naga struck, coiling his tail around Roman and lifting him from his feet. Of course he struggled, but the naga was strong and he had dropped his sword when the tail had wrapped around him, there was nothing he could do as he was brought face to face with the - admittedly incredibly beautiful - creature. He wanted to look at the others, but he also didn’t know if the naga knew they were there - and if he didn’t then Roman didn’t want to draw attention to them. If he was going to die here, he would have to make sure they could get out. 

He had expected the naga to squeeze him to death, maybe sink those razor sharp fangs into Roman’s skin and kill him slowly. The naga drew closer and flicked his tongue to smell him, Roman squeezed his eyes shut in preparation but no pain came, instead he felt cool lips pressed to his forehead. It was then that he realised a few different things at once.

First, the naga didn’t want to kill him - he would have done so by now. Second, his scales were cool and smooth where they pressed up against Roman’s bare arms, his tail wasn’t squeezing too hard. Though Roman couldn’t really struggle or escape, he could breath easily, it felt more like an embrace. Third… the naga had just kissed him. Now he was being stared at with a look that seemed like hopeful awe. 

“You…” Roman whispered, not being able to come up with words to express what he wanted to say - which was rare for him. Why was this beautiful thing looking at him like he hung the stars?

One of his hands came up to cup Roman’s face and he found himself leaning into it purely on instinct. The naga’s hands were cool and half scaled and it felt nice against his warm skin - and Roman had never been one to shy away from touch. Roman was passed then from the naga’s tail to his arms, where he was cradled against his strong chest. Despite the fear he had felt mere minutes ago, Roman couldn’t help the way his brain was screaming ‘safe’. He curled into the embrace. 

“Mine,” the naga hissed in Roman’s ear, his voice smooth and warm like melted chocolate, the sound made his breath hitch, “Ssssmokey one, you are ssso warm.”

“Let him go!” Patton's voice comes from the entrance to the chamber. Both Roman and the naga turn heads to look at him. Logan seemed to be trying to get Patton to be quiet and Virgil looked to be mid-panic attack. Roman felt a little bad. The naga moved closer to them and Patton tensed the closer he got. 

“He isss not hurt,” the Naga said, voice gentle as he turned a little to show Roman to them. Roman gave them a little wave and it seemed to placate the three of them just a little, “The little human iss but mine - and sso are you, my gems.”

His tail quickly hoists Patton into the air as well, but leaves his arms free unlike he had with Roman. Patton squeaked, flailing a little until he too realised he wasn’t being killed. When the naga drew him closer, he reached for Roman’s hand, he quickly took it. 

“Put them down,” Logan said, voice monotonous but hiding a venom that Roman could recognise, “We are not yours to hoard.”

“You are mine to love, little witch,” The naga says, “My little humans,”

Patton and Roman both found themselves lowered into the centre of the admittedly amazingly comfortable nest. Roman immediately scrambled over to Patton, pulling him into a gentle hug as the naga turned his attention to Virgil and Logan. Although they had been freed from his hold directly, they were still separated from the others by coils of the Naga’s tail, so they simply sat and waited. 

A stretch of silence passed as the naga’s eyes tracked Virgil curiously - the normally vigilant light-wielder didn’t seem to notice, focused on searching for something in the mass of blankets instead. 

“What are you looking for, little one?” he asked, curling himself around Virgil and making him jump badly and look around to face him. Virgil seemed to freeze, but the naga remained as passive as ever. 

Another silent moment passed, “...my cloak,” Virgil admitted softly, “The big one you - you took a few weeks ago.”

Barely a moment passed before the naga slithered to a spot and dug through the blankets to pull out a mass of black fabric, decorated with purple embroidery which he brought back to Virgil - who stared at him in surprise and wonder. 

“I liked this one,” the naga said, placing it around Virgil’s shoulders. Virgil immediately let out a sigh of relief, practically melting into the fabric, “It'sss big.”

“Yes,” Virgil said quietly. The naga offers him a hand that he tentatively takes and Virgil is carefully lifted to stand on a coil of his tail, steadied by the naga’s hand as he’s brought to join Patton and Roman, who accepted him into their hug gently, earning a fond smile from the naga, who then turned his attention back to Logan, who was growing less and less steadfast in his resistance by the moment. 

“You haven’t usssed that on me yet,” the naga says almost conversationally, gesturing to Logan’s faintly glowing staff - which he was clutching like a lifeline, “What are you waiting for, little witch?”

“I-” Logan faltered, “You…”

The naga hummed, “Will you join uss, little witch?”

Logan frowned, pausing, “What is your name, naga?”

A smile spread across the naga’s face, “I am called Janus,” He answers, voice still gentle.

“I am Logan,” Logan says, “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Ssso polite,” Janus hisses, edging forwards toward him.

“You’ve been stealing from us for months.” Logan backs up a step and Janus pauses, “Why?”

This seemed to give Janus pause, since he actually stopped to take a second and think about his answer. Roman found he was curious as he grabbed a red fluffy blanket - one of his favourites that he had lost - from the top of the pile and wrapped it around his shoulders. For that he earned a pat on the shoulder from Virgil and a kiss to the cheek from Patton. 

“I wanted my humans near me,” Janus said eventually, “But you would not come, I had to make do.”

Roman couldn’t quite work out whether that was absolutely adorable or kind of sad.

“Is that why you took my orb?” Logan asked, taking off his bag and placing it carefully behind him. Proceeding to carefully put his staff down with it, “So we would come here?”

Janus looked away, an almost embarrassed expression overtaking his face. Roman couldn’t help but share a smile with his loves. Virgil smirked back and Roman just knew  from that look he was holding back from teasing the naga that technically had them hostage and vulnerable viciously. “Perhaps.”

“You could have simply approached us,” Logan said, his tone minutely softer. 

Janus raised an eyebrow and simply gestured to his tail, which took up the majority of the large cavern. 

“Right,” Logan said, frowning, “Yet you managed to sneak into our house to steal?”

“Nagas have magic too, little witch,” Janus hissed, finally approaching him properly, carefully and slowly wrapping his coils around him to lift him and place him in the nest with the others. Logan seemed curious, but Janus didn’t seem willing to elaborate as he placed Logan in their little circle. Patton immediately reached for him. 

Meticulously, Janus picked over the four of them, taking their weapons and adding them to a small pile as well as anything breakable or uncomfortable. Roman had difficulty giving up his sword’s sheath - even if the sword itself had been left on the floor of the cavern already, but Janus promised it would be safe in his hoard and lifted Roman gently so he could see where he placed it. The others were easier to disarm, especially Logan - who had already left his things at the door, so to speak. 

When he was done he coaxed the four of them to lie down with a gentle voice and soft, alluring words, promising them safety and comfort as he buried himself once more in the blankets, laying himself down so he wrapped the four of them in his coils and his human torso could lie amongst them, allowing himself to wrap his arms around Roman and for Virgil to share his cloak. Logan held Virgil carefully from behind and Patton found himself laid across all four of them, his head in Roman’s lap and his feet in Logans. 

“My little ones,” Janus whispered as the lights above them dimmed, a hand carding through Virgil’s hair where his head rested against Janus’ shoulder, his lips brushed Roman’s forehead and he reached to brush a hand over Logan and Patton’s faces in turn, “My lovely humans.”

Patton let out a content hum and squirmed a little to get comfortable, Roman heard Logan let out a happy sigh. 

“So warm, so sweet,” Janus hissed softly as he tugged Roman closer, burying his face in his shoulder. Roman had always run the warmest of the group. 

Patton fell asleep first, and then Roman next. Logan fell next, with a little gentle coaxing from the naga until it was just Virgil. 

—-

“You are still scared, little gem,” Janus said softly, brushing  the hair from Virgil’s face, “My little amethyst, what scares you?”

It takes a long time for Virgil to answer and in that time Virgil meets his eyes and Janus knows without him saying a word that it’s him Virgil is afraid of still. 

“How do I know you won’t turn on us while I sleep?” Virgil asked, even despite his fears his voice is still quiet so as not to wake the others, “How do I know they’re safe.”

“I will protect them,” Janus says softly, leaning forward and kissing Virgil’s forehead. Roman makes a soft sound and shifts in his sleep, one of his arms wraps around Janus’ waist and he sighs contently, “I love you all, my sweet ones, I will protect you, I promise.”

“How do I know that?” Virgil insisted, “How do I know you’re not lying.”

“Do you have a bad feeling about me, my amethyst?” Janus asked softly, cupping Virgil’s cheek with a hand. 

Virgil takes a long moment to consider, before he eventually shakes his head. His eyes are wide. 

“No,” he says softly, meeting Janus’ eyes again, “I think you’re good.”

“Then trust me, little human,” Janus hissed softly, the sound practically luring Virgil to relax. He takes a deep breath and… does. 

Virgil falls asleep with the others and Janus keeps his promise.

----

Tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess @glacierruler @roseianxiety @bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti @scalesfeathersnfur @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat (if anyone wants to be added, let me know!)

----

[logan-the-artist]

Hey Logan! Hope you’ve had a a good New Year’s eve so far! I was wondering if I could request a romantic Mociet something? or maybe Janus, Remus, and Patton? Either one is fine.

I hope you have a wonderful day, and wonderful 2024! And I just wanted to shoot you a thanks! Your blog and art work have helped me regain confidence in my art and actually want to put effort in to make it look good! Keep up the incredible work and the amazing art!

(•^•)- <3

hello!! i have, hope you too!

here’s the sillies <3

thank you so much!! i’m flattered and incredibly glad that i’ve been able to give someone the confidence i’ve once lacked in myself.

i’ve checked out your art and it’s great!! don’t ever stop making art, you’re incredible!!

i really appreciate the sweet words, have an awesome 2024! <333

[blackoutbugza]

how each of the sides would comfort you when your crying

patton: extreme love and affection. he’s holding your hand, telling you how far you’ve gotten, how awesome you are, ect. he’s also giving you a lot of food and water.

logan: he’s showing more empathy than sympathy. his arm is wrapped around you and he might lean his head on you to show you he knows how you feel, but he’s not saying a word. he’ll listen to you vent for hours.

roman: probably crying too, let’s be honest. he feels a balance of empathy and sympathy but he’s trying his hardest to make you happy. he talks a lot, but it’s nothing annoying. it’s more of a ramble in defense of you.

virgil: probably scared out of his mind. he wouldn’t know what to do, but he’d sit and talk with you and try to help you work through it. he’d be awkward and nervous, but he’d know dead on exactly how you feel.

janus: he’s hugging you. he might tell you some lies at the time, but it’s only to make you feel better. even though it might seem like he doesn’t care he really does. he doesn’t show it, but he’s just as nervous as virgil would be.

remus: awkward and quiet at first since i wouldn’t imagine he’d deal with such emotions often for himself, but later he’d be trying to make you laugh. he’d be making jokes and poking fun at the situation in lighthearted ways until you smile, let’s be honest.

[asksanderssides]

Question for Virgil: Opinions on literal snakes and krakens?

Virgil: I used to like snakes, I've always been a fan of underappreciated animals, and I always thought they were really cool. Now, though, they have some kinda bad connotations for me.

Virgil: Krakens are fucking awesome, though-

Patton: Virgil!

Virgil: Sorry, freaking awesome. I'm sure Remus would be thrilled to hear people compare him to a kraken, but to be honest I don't associate those with him the way I associate snakes with Janus. If I had to compare Remus to an animal, it would be... I dunno, a ferret maybe, or a really annoying mosquito.

[laferocia]

Mike Patton and the "piadina gate"

CHAPTER 1: THE WAR.

Bologna, 2004.

Mike is in Bologna with the Fantomas. Bologna is located in Emilia Romagna, and one of the typical foods of the region is called Piadina (or piada, colloquially). It's a kind of flatbread filled with cheese and cold cuts (but not only that) and is also sold as street food because it's easy to carry. There was probably a piadina truck around there somewhere.

Min 0:11: Oh! Mi può portare una piadina con la salsiccia? Per favore? Adesso, qua! Mi senti? Oh! Can you bring me a piadina with sausage? Please? Right now, here! Can you hear me?

*dal pubblico: ragazzo 1: una birra! Ragazzo 2: Sei un grande!* *From the audience: Guy 1: a beer! Guy 2: You're awesome!*

Mike: Ok una piada normale, non importa, e una birretta. Okay, just a regular piadina, no problem, and a little beer (Probably the piadina truck didn't have sausage, and they only had the classic piadina with squaquerone cheese and prosciutto di Parma)

*dal pubblico: una birra! Un litro!* *From the audience: a beer! One liter!*

Mike: Ma che buongustai! What gourmets! (LOL I can't get why he said that)

Min 0:47: Siete stronzi! Sì voi, in bianco! Sto parlando a voi! You guys are jerks! Yes, you in white! I'm talking to you! (I'll digress on the term 'Stronzo': in Italian, it literally means 'piece of shit,' but it's less harsh. It's still an insult, make no mistake. However, one of our characteristics is that we have a rich vocabulary of insults and vulgarity, and we insult each other most of the time, so Mike fits right in, LOL).

CHAPTER 2: THE PEACE.

min 0:10: Bella Bologna!: Mike is off to a great start with typical Italian expressions. "Bella" is a kind of greeting, it was widely used by Italian rappers and roughly means "everything's good, all good." It's not directly translatable, as in Italian, "bella" means "beautiful."

Forsa ragassi!: This guy is a true legend. "Forza ragazzi" means "come on, be brave!" but it's an exhortation that we use in a thousand situations. Mike pronounces the 's' and 'z' in the typical Emilian and Romagnol way, as if they were all sibilant 's' sounds. It's something that only a native speaker would be able to do and perceive because it exists only in spoken Italian.

min 0:39: una bella piadina romagnola piena di merda! A lovely Romagnola piadina filled with shit!

min 0:50: È vero che voi chiamate Bologna "la grassa"?: Is it true that you guys call Bologna "the fat one"? ("Bologna the Fat" due to its delicious and hearty cuisine. In Italy, we have nicknames for some of the major cities. Rome is "the Eternal City," Naples is "the City of 500 Domes," and so on. Bologna boasts at least two more nicknames: "the Learned one" (because the first European university was founded here in 1088) and "the Red one" (for its red roofs and walls and, later on, for its political tradition closely aligned with the left).

min 0:56: Allora siete tutti ciccioni? So, are you all chubby? (The crowd of spectators said in unison "yes")

min 1:02: E infatti pensavo così, eh, perché ho visto un ciccionissimo di "Turisti per caso", aquì. E poi c'è Maurizio Costanzo là. And, in fact, I was thinking that way, you know, because I saw a really chubby guy from "Turisti per caso" here. And then there's Maurizio Costanzo over there. (Many years ago, there was a TV show called "Turisti per caso," hosted by a husband and wife. He, Patrizio Roversi, was indeed a bit on the heavier side. However, it's worth noting that Mike might sometimes mix up gender, so he could have been referring to her, Syusy Blady, who was also a bit on the heavier side at that time. Maurizio Costanzo was an important and famous Italian journalist who was known also for being overweight. However, I must clarify that Costanzo probably wasn't really at the concert LOL. BTW, Mike said "aquì" and it's spanish, in italian is "qui").

min 03:12: The piadina vendor gets on stage and brings Mike a piadina and beer.

min 04:10: Grazie di nuovo, ci vediamo alla prossima! Stamme bene, ciao! Thank you again, see you next time, take care, bye! ("Stamme bene" is indeed in Roman dialect. Who knows, maybe he was already close to ZU band, LOL. To make it grammatically correct it should be "Statemi bene" cos "stammi" is singular).

Mike and the piadina vendor hug each other.

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Awareness

Prompts: This isn’t really a prompt more like headcanon that I thought would be cool. Soooo take this and use it as you please or just leave it, whatever strikes your fancy:) Basically instead of Virgil being a dark side before anxiety, anxiety is his dark side. Before he was anxiety he was instead some kind of awareness or watchfulness (either a gray or light side). After the mindscape split or king spilt or some traumatic past event happened Virgil freaked out becoming anxiety. And now as his make up gets lighter he is reverting back to who he was before. Except no one knows who he used to be, thinking anxiety was just created after the past traumatic event.  Anyway, you’re awesome! You’re such a talented writer and I’m glad I stumbled upon your account <3 - anon

Heyo! So, I really wanted to share a headcannon that I think is truly wonderful. Y'know how lots of people stand behind the spider!Virgil headcanon??? Well what if all he has are the hidden eyes and the ability to stick to surfaces. Like, he gets spooked and BAM! He's on the wall, or maybe on the ceiling! It has proba ly scare each side a couple times? I thought I would be really cool! - artwithtoto

Heyo. I don't know if you're taking anprompts anymore, but if you are, I have one for you. {Virgil being a mother hen to the other Sides in small ways and helping them with their anxieties, and overall taking care of the otherSides, then maybe they take care of him.} I thought it would be super cute. :) Thanks for your time. - anon

Read on Ao3

Warnings: none

Pairings: gen

Word Count: 3015

There are a few things that people take for granted when it comes to Anxiety. For one, it actually is a healthy amount of anxiety and stress that keeps you alive; fear of death, helps, ties into that whole self-preservation thing Janus is always talking about. Keeps you aware of things too, like deadlines, other people, just a general hey, we exist in a way that has to interact with a bunch of other things, let’s maybe be sensible about it. 

Now, of course, everything in moderation. Too much Anxiety is bad. But, as they’ve discovered, not any at all is also bad. 

Something that the Sides in particular seem to forget is that Virgil’s tied to the general Anxiety in the Mindscape too. That means that when one of them gets scared or starts freaking out about something, whoops, he gets summoned. Most of the time this is fine, odds are they’re having a nightmare or stressing about some project—which is his job, thank you, no stealing his thunder—and he can just get them out of it and sort everything out as much as possible before they both go their separate ways and someone gets some sleep. 

Sometimes it’s a bit more than that. 

Virgil appears outside of Patton’s door one morning. Well, technically it’s morning. He shakes himself off and looks around, orienting himself at this end of the hallway before shaking his head and knocking lightly on the door. 

“Hey, Pat? You in there?”

No response. 

“Patton, I know I got summoned here for a reason, you gonna open the door?”

When silence comes again, Virgil frowns and reaches out to test the knob. His frown deepens when it gives right away and the door swings open with a low creak. 

“Hey, Patton? You okay?”

He glances around, squinting in the darkness, trying to figure out where Patton might be, when he spots the closet door ajar and a pile of clothes outside. He steps a bit closer and the pile shudders. 

“Pop Star? That you?”

“V-Virgil?”

“Yeah, sweetheart, it’s me.” Virgil closes the door gently and crouches, shuffling over to sit next to him on the floor. “What’s going on?”

“It’s silly.”

“You’re upset, that’s not silly.”

Patton’s face—no glasses, he must’ve just woken up—turns and stares at him, small bits of his face a tad shinier than others. Virgil lets out a soft noise and reaches out to brush the tears away. 

“Hey,” he murmurs, wrapping his arms around him, “hey, let’s get you back in bed, okay? Come on, up we go…”

He scoops the little ball of Patton into his arms and carries him back over to the bed, tucking him in and sitting on the edge. 

“What scared you?”

“The…the dark.” Patton glances over his shoulder. “Monsters in the closet.”

“You need me to check?”

“Don’t—“ he grabs his sleeve— “they’ll get you too.”

“What if I stay? Keep watch for you?”

“But you need to sleep too.”

“I’ll sleep here.” Virgil lies down next to him as Patton pulls back the covers, immediately snapping himself into something softer. “Yeah? This okay?”

“…thank you.”

“Hey, it’s okay, Pop Star. Whatever scares you scares you. You don’t have to be ashamed of it.”

Patton smiles, turning over to snuggle into the blankets. Virgil keeps one eye on the closet and one on him as they drift off to sleep. 

2.

Virgil’s yanked abruptly through the ceiling to sprawl on Logan’s bed, wincing when the sharp spiral of a notebook digs into his ribs. “Ow.”

“Virgil? What are you doing here?”

“You tell me, Specs. I was minding my own business scrolling through the Internet and then poof, I’m here.”

As he says that, though, he looks up and realizes the reason Logan’s got notebooks strewn on top of his bed is that his desk is an absolute nightmare. Papers piled up haphazardly, there’s at least three different water bottles he can see, and the desktop of his computer is littered with too many icons. 

“…you know what, nevermind, I know why I’m here.”

Logan sighs, adjusting his glasses. “I certainly don’t. If you could explain it—“

“C’mon, Specs. You know better.”

“I’m not in the mood for any riddles, Virgil, if you could let me get back to work—“

“That’s strike one.”

“Strike one—this isn’t baseball, Virgil, I have several projects I have to—“

“Strike two. C’mon, L, just come over here.”

“…Virgil, I can’t, I have to get these finished. The second draft is due this Friday, I have to give Roman time to—hey!”

“Strike three.” Virgil adjusts his grip on the squirming nerd as he pulls him away from his desk, wrapping his arms around him to prevent any escape. “Stop fighting me. You’re not going to win.”

“Let me go, I need to—“

“You need to stop stressing out about this, that’s what you need to do. Oh, for—L, stop.”

Logan stops, mouth forming a tight line as Virgil rests his chin on his shoulder. After a few more moments of being tightly restrained—or properly cuddled, as Remus likes to call it—he lets out a long breath and sags against Virgil’s chest. 

“Hey, L,” Virgil says quietly, “you need to take a break. You’re gonna work yourself up and then nothing’s gonna get done.”

“…I know.”

“Come on, snack time. What do you want? We got crackers, we got fruit, I’m pretty sure there’re some pretzels left too, if Remus hasn’t eaten all of them.”

“Pretzels sound good.”

“Great. Come walk with me.”

“Thank you,” Logan mumbles as Virgil moves him gently out of the door, “for checking.”

“That’s my job!”

3.

“If you could just—“

“Nope.”

“But I want to—“

“Nope.”

“Virgil, this is ridiculous, I am clearly capable of—“

“No, you’re not.”

“Well, if you could let me go—“

“Nah.”

“You’re not being fair.”

“Mm. Nope.”

“Oh, after all the conversations we’ve had about hearing each other out, did you just decide that no longer applies to you?”

“Not when it comes to you neglecting your health.”

“Neglecting my—bitch, I am the only one who practices regular self-care around here.”

“Which means you know better.”

“Just let me go—“

“You take that thermometer over there and if it tells me you’re within normal limits, I’ll let you up.”

“Fine, fine. Then will you let me go?”

“If that thing says you’re within normal limits, yeah, I’ll let you go.”

“…fine.”

“What’s it say?”

“…I’m still too cold.”

“Mhm. So get your snake ass comfortable ‘cause I’m not letting you up until you can feel all your scales again.”

“I hate you.”

“Liar.”

“…yeah, maybe.”

“Shh, snake-face. Just go to sleep. You’ll feel better when you wake up.”

“Thanks.”

“I’ll kick your ass into taking care of it too, don’t you worry.”

“I wasn’t.”

“Sure.”

“I wasn’t!”

“You should be sleeping.”

4.

Most of the time, Virgil’s normal Side-like appearance is what gives the others the most comfort. They all look pretty much the same, give or take a few things, and it’s a sense of, well, normalcy. It’s not unexpected, it’s not jarring, it’s not going to give them something else to be worried about. 

With Remus, though…

Remus is a tricky little stinker. He’s simultaneously one of the most difficult Sides to interact with and he’s much smarter than he lets on, which means that if you’re having a problem that you can’t quite put the words to, he’s gonna be able to put the words to it and then you’ll have to confront it. 

Blessing and a curse. 

Of course, Remus also has his side of the Imagination to wrestle with and it can get a little…tempestuous. Monsters, ghouls, all the intrusive thought gremlins that make absolute nuisances of themselves and only Remus by and large can deal with them. This means that his understanding of…well, what happens outside of the Imagination is a bit different than everyone else’s. 

So sometimes Virgil gets little pings from Remus when he feels like he’s too much of a freak for the rest of them and that just won’t do. 

Now, Virgil does not make a habit of scaring the other Sides—unless it’s Halloween. This does mean that there are certain parts of him that he doesn’t get to show very often. 

All the Sides, contrary to popular belief, do have some animal-like tendencies. It’s just that the Dark Sides are the ones who show it off more. Remus has his octopus-like and squid-like moments, some Kraken moments in there too, Janus is just a snake—with extra arms because…sure—and Virgil’s a spider. 

Pausing for gasps of shock…

It’s not like he grows a bunch of extra legs, or massive fangs that sprout out of his mouth, although those would be cool. No, he just sticks to walls and has a bunch of extra eyes. 

Spiderman would be much more interesting if he had more eyes. Just saying. 

So when he gets summoned to Remus’s room and finds him mumbling to himself about freaks and monsters and sounding eerily similar to a certain chaos Dorito, he climbs up into a corner of the wall and waits. 

“Who’s there?” Remus’s head whips around. “If that’s one of you, I told you you’re not allowed in here right now. I have shit to do.”

Virgil chitters quietly. Remus’s head swings back and forth. 

“I’m not kidding,” he says again, voice getting higher, “come out now and I’ll take you back home. I’m busy.”

The shriek he gets when Virgil pounces on him from the ceiling is priceless, as is the scrunched-up face and little pout he gets when he realizes who it is. 

“Emo,” he whines, smacking Virgil’s chest, “you scared me!”

“Sure did, little octopus. You gotta be quicker than that.”

“You snuck into my room!”

“Got summoned, actually.” He gives him a mock stern look with eight eyes. “Your voices being mean to you again?”

“…maybe.”

“I’m here to tell them to fuck off. You wanna help?”

Remus nods and a few of his tentacles curl out of his back. Virgil nods approvingly and drags Remus up into his lap, wrapping his arms around him and squeezing him tight. 

“I want you,” he mumbles, “I want you a lot. You’re a good bro.”

“Don’t let Roman hear you say that.”

“You’re both good.”

“I gotcha, little octopus, you just stay right here with me.”

5.

Whoever decided that the creativitwins—he saw it online, it slaps, he’s stealing it—get the most rational fears is a piece of shit. He’ll say it. 

There’s only so much you can do for people who are really, really scared. You can’t just talk them out of it, you can’t just cuddle it away, you’ve really just got to rely on them to ask for when they need help and what exactly they need you to do for them. 

In case this has escaped your notice, Roman is really bad at this. 

This does mean that whenever it gets bad enough for Virgil to actually get summoned, it’s really fucking bad. 

So when Virgil appears in Roman’s room, he’s already swallowing back a curse at the sight of their brave prince, sitting in a heap on the floor, tears streaming down his face. 

“Hey, Princey,” he murmurs, crouching down and reaching out for Roman’s hands, “can you look at me?”

Roman blinks and looks up, sniffling. 

“You scared right now?”

“Mhm.”

“Okay. Thank you for telling me. Can I help?”

He sniffles again, squeezing Virgil’s hands weakly. 

“That a yes, bud? Yeah? Okay. I’m gonna come sit with you. You just keep looking at me, okay? Nowhere, else, just at me. J gave me a new eyeshadow palette, you have a look and tell me what you think of the pigment. Personally, I think it’s a little too desaturated for me, but you’re the color expert.”

As he talks, he carefully loops Roman’s arms around his neck, easing himself to the ground and reaching to resettle Roman’s limbs to prevent any cramps or stiffness. 

“I don’t think my undertones are quite right for it either. I was talking to Remus the other day about eyeliner and really, I think my eyes water too much. I’m all for the disheveled-haven’t-slept-in-a-week eye bags, but I’m not trying to go full Winter Soldier here.”

A tiny laugh. He smiles, reaching out to cup Roman’s face in his hands, tugging them a little closer. 

“Hey,” he says again, brushing away some of the tears. “You’re doing great, okay? Just keep looking at me.”

Roman’s fingers twitch and he takes a shaky breath. “’S a lot.”

“Everything’s a lot right now? That’s okay, Princey, you don’t have to deal with it all right now. I know it’s overwhelming and scary, we’re here for you, remember?”

Roman shakes his head. “’S a lot of eyeshadow.”

Virgil gasps, gently tugging his hair. “How dare you?”

It’s worth it for the watery giggle he gets in return. 

“Unbelievable,” he says, half-scolding, half-complimenting, “you are absolutely unbelievable.”

“Mhm.”

“You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

“…no?”

“Nah, Princey,” he murmurs, leaning forward to rest their foreheads together, “you’re stuck with us. We’re not going anywhere.”

+1. 

“Hey, Virgil?”

Virgil lets his head lean over the arm of the couch. “What’s up?”

“Your—your eyeshadow. It’s purple.”

“Is it?” He touches his face. “Huh. Didn’t know that was coming back.”

Logan’s book thuds as it closes. “Coming…back?”

“Well, yeah. It hasn’t been like that since…oh, before the Split.”

He glances around as all other sounds in the living room come to a stop.

“What?”

“Your eyeshadow was purple before the Split?” Patton sits up. “Why did it change?”

“Uhh...did you guys not also change when the Split happened?”

“I don’t remember shit from before the Split,” Remus announces proudly as Roman rolls his eyes, “and neither does Ro!”

Roman just wraps his arms tightly around Remus and pulls him closer, setting his chin on his shoulder. “I’m just gonna hang onto this.”

Janus sighs as the twins start playfully pushing each other, turning back to Virgil. “I don’t remember changing, as such, no. Just…becoming me.”

“How is that not changing?”

“In a manner of speaking, are we not all always changing?”

“Okay, that’s enough of that philosophy book,” Logan mumbles, taking it from Janus’s hands, “but I have to agree. I do not remember any significant difference with myself before and after the Split.”

Virgil’s hands pause. “…oh.”

“Kiddo? Did you?”

“Well…yeah. My—my whole thing changed?”

The twins stop too. “What do you mean ‘your whole thing?’” Roman sits up. “Like, your role?”

“I wasn’t always Anxiety.”

You could hear a pin drop. 

“…I thought you guys knew that?” They all shake their heads. “No, I—I used to just be Awareness. Then the Split happened and everybody freaked out and I…”

…changed.

“Whoa, hey.” Remus is suddenly right there. “Hey, Emo, it’s okay. You’re okay. It’s gonna be okay.”

Yeah, yeah, of course it is. Why is Remus talking like that?

“Shh, little one—“ oh, hey Logan, “we’re right here. We still care for you, no matter what your role is.”

Oh. Oh, shit, he hasn’t freaked out about this in a while. 

“Probably because you haven’t had to think about it.”

Thanks, J. 

“You need a cuddle?” Virgil opens his arms and something Patton-shaped fills it. “Hey, kiddo, it’s okay.”

Well, now that he’s realized he’s freaking out, he starts freaking out properly. Sobbing, snotty mess, all over Patton’s shirt. How embarrassing. 

“Don’t be ashamed of needing help,” Roman chides like a hypocrite, which he immediately acknowledges, “don’t be like me and wait until it’s too much to deal with.”

“It’s our turn to take care of you.” Remus ruffles his hair and carefully puts him in Patton’s lap. “You just be a little mess right now, okay?”

“Remus, that’s rude.”

“What? Not all of us can look like tragic heroes when we have breakdowns, Roro.”

“It is unfair how easily you do that.”

“Just let Virge be all messy. He can have a little mess, as a treat.”

Leave it to them to make him laugh when he’s trying to have a breakdown. He buries his head in Patton’s shoulder and yeah, he’s just gonna stay here for a while. 

General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash  @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv  @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb  @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance @whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti

If you want to be added/taken off the taglist, let me know!

[tssdresses]

Update on Orange Poll Dress and Roman's Casual Look Mini project

Just a quick update for you all about how these projects have been progressing, plus a sneak peak on the next dress I want to make.

On both of these projects: I am heading back to school this week, and classes start next week, so they're on hold until I can get adjusted to the new schedule. Shouldn't take too long, but you should expect to hear about the Roman mini project before the poll dress.

Orange Poll Dress

So, this dress has had the least amount of progress since I last posted about fabric scavenging on 12/24. I haven't had the time to go and get some fresh fabrics, and the fabrics I have were really leaving me... uninspired. You'd think that a dress which I had other people pick out all the design elements for would be easy to make, but, uh... not really, unfortunately. I'm working on it!

It's on pause until I can go to a fabric store with some friends to get properly re-inspired and get a good idea going! I'm hoping to give you an update on it in the next month (so, mid February).

Roman's Causal Look Mini project

Okay, on the list of things to do for this project now includes getting a proper master post up, haha.

This outfit has a few elements that still need completion.

The jacket is done!

I started making a corset top via the 'wrap yourself in plastic and duct tape to make a pattern' method and it didn't go very well, so I'm scrapping that to try something else. The top still needs some editing.

I found a cool mesh shirt with floral patterns I'm going to use as an undershirt, though!

The skirt looks awesome and just needs to have an elastic waist put in, and then it'll be good to go.

I have the coolest boots for the outfit and I'm so pleased.

So, in short, I have minor adjustments to make on the skirt and a corset-inspired blouse to make, and then it'll be ready. I also have a tiara I've been wanting an excuse to wear so this'll be great.

My goal is to complete this cosplay by the end of February.

Upcoming project

Spring is coming! The next dress I make I am very excited for. It's going to be a sundress for Emile Picani, based on the fanfiction Love And Other Fairy Tales, mostly because I want a sundress I can wear. My goal is to make it in the month of March so it's ready for springtime in the mountains.

(No one say anything about Patton's wedding dress from LAOFT it's in a bag in the back of my closet begging me to work on it I'll get to it eventually I promise)

[puzzled-pegasus]

did you know there's a Taylor Swift song for most if not all of the Sanders Sides ships?

Really early in my and @surenschompychompers ' Sides phase, we were on a phone call talking about them and we jokingly realized that for most if not all Sides ships, there's a Taylor Swift song that fits them. Since we're mostly out of it now and have nothing more to do with these, I thought I'd share them for still-going-strong fans to see :)

Logince: Gorgeous- come ON, is this not absolutely the way Roman talks and thinks about Logan??

Logicality: Lover- they are literally married and you can't convince me otherwise, god I love them so much

Analogical: Delicate- I can't really explain this one as well....it just be having the Vibe

Loceit: Getaway Car- this one's a teensy bit more specific, but I thought about this scenario where Logan and Janus rob a bank together and then Logan ends up double crossing Janus, does that not sound awesome??

Dukeceit: ...Ready For It?- oh my god, the drama and action and flirtyness of this song fits them perfectly, I love it

Prinxiety: Style- this was actually the first one we saw in the pattern. Not much of an explanation really, but the Vibes are really, REALLY strong.

Royality: Love Story- the dreamy, soft vibes of this song as well as the royalty motif make it a really good fit.

Anxceit: I Knew You Were Trouble.- Does this one really need an explanation?

Moxiety: cardigan- I don't actually know this song that well, so apologies if it doesn't fit, we just looked at the lyrics briefly before deciding lol

Dukexiety: We Are Never Getting Back Together- I think if Virgil and Remus ever DID have any sort of fling, it would be over quickly and Virgil would want to forget it ever happened, so this song fits my personal vibe of them.

Roceit: Look What You Made Me Do- Not really a ship song, more of Roman's revenge song for Janus making a fool of him.

Intrulogical: Blank Space- oh my god how funny this one is. It's so good. Go listen to it immediately and then look me in the eye and tell me the song does not fit them perfectly I dare you I fu--

Moceit: Mean- It's not really a ship song, just Patton complaining about Janus's negativity, but I think it fits.

(BONUS) Rosleep: Wildest Dreams- Remy and Roman would have the angstiest most dramatic breakup, oh my god, the hilarity. Someone go write a fic immediately.

I know I definitely missed someone so please let me know, I am notoriously forgetful when making lists lmfao

(@surenschompychompers, please let me know if you want me to delete this)

[estradasphere]

started listening to high castle teleorkestra because of you and IM LOSING MY MIND. this Fucks so Hard

do you have any more band recs??

YESS ANOTHER HCT FAN theyre working on another album rn btw :]

as for music recs... hmmm ... im not very good at those cuz i dont listen to a ton of different bands LOL... if you know HCT you probably already know about Estradasphere / Mr Bungle / Umlaut too, but i'll still rec those here just in case you havent (in particular, Palace of Mirrors / California / self-titled are their most HCT-like albums respectively and fuck super hard. Umlaut is pretty different from the other two, more quaint and electronic-y, but their influence on HCT's sound shines through in some places, especially the title track / aramchek accusation / valisystem A imo)

what else...... if you dig the traditional romanian influences on the sound of HCT and Esphere then check out Fishtank Ensemble; the esphere guitarist's band Orange Tulip Conspiracy(later known as Atomic Ape) is very HCT/Palace of Mirrors esque, proggy and eclectic; and oh yeah check out The Deserts of Traun too. wait this just turned into me listing Estradasphere satellite groups sorry i have brainworms. I guess the problem is that not much else sounds like HCT, theyre super unique!!

branching out a bit, if you're just looking for more eclectic experimental shit in general... Sleepytime Gorilla Museum is fucking awesome, very dark and heavy avant-metal sound, essential listening imo, I'd start with their album Of Natural History; similarly, check out The Book of Knots too (especially Garden of Fainting Stars); Fantomas (esp. The Director's Cut) and Kaada/Patton also have this kinda dark and heavy orchestral cinematic sound; Sebkha-Chott is a truly bizarre avant-prog/metal/jazz(???) fit that never sticks to one musical idea for more than like 60 seconds, they're awesome, I'd say start with Tapisseries Fines En... etc, long album title; OH OH check out öOoOoOoOoOo and Pin-Up Went Down too for more French experimental metal/jazz shit (though they're also pretty poppy and catchy!), I love them a lot; X-Legged Sally is some awesome Belgian jazz/prog/occassionally-metal-ish stuff; and if you want something lighter and simpler to cleanse the palate then Tin Hat is some beautiful chamber jazz/klezmer, my fav album of theirs is Book of Silk.

You may also like bands like Dog Fashion Disco, Polkadot Cadaver, Stolen Babies, and ESPECIALLY Secret Chiefs 3 - i've seen those as avant-metal recs a lot, but they don't really click with me personally, unfortunately! I hope you end up liking them though!

HOLY SHIT I WROTE SO MUCH IM SO SORRY I JUST LOVE PRETENDING I KNOW THINGS ABOUT MUSIC LOL

[ask-patton]

((looking for comfort/vent ps thanks for doing this 💜💜💜)) Dad, I had an awful day at work today, and I'm so frustrated. I just found out that a really close friend has been lying to me about her (sexual, not gonna get detailed, but otherwise extreme toxic) relationship, and kinda using me//taking advantage of my kindness and efforts to help. I feel kinda lost; this is the first really close friend I've had in a long time, I don't want to lose our relationship. But at the same time, I found out all the lies from a different friend, and I'm really really hurt by it. I feel so stupid for not even asking questions. And then when I tried to talk to someone else I trusted, they brushed me off, saying I need to just grow up (I tend towards liking "childish stuff" like plushies/Minecraft and I'm ace so a lot of people kinda look down their noses at me, even tho I *am* an adult...) I don't really need advice, just someone to listen, so thanks for having your ask box open dad 💜🐝

That's a really tough situation, kiddo. You sound like a really kind person and I hope things work out. Sending dad hugs. 💙

In the meantime, plushies and Minecraft are awesome! Don't be ashamed of your interests and turning to those things for comfort. (Also, ace people are really cool 😎.) None of this makes you any less of an adult and shouldn't be looked down on. Keep your chin up, you've got this!

Extra 💙 from plushie Patton!

[Image description: plushie Patton is held up in the foreground by a hand. The background is blurry, but consists of a green lawn and dark green treeline. Plushie Patton is wearing Patton's classic outfit. He is smiling with his eyes closed and mouth wide open. End image description]