#REFERENCE * ( olivia benson )

[wily-one24]

I am intrigued by your liking Casey more. So character break down for her to, if you want.

Okay, but like... I did SAY I understood it was unpopular opinion. I know everyone loves Alex. And I like her too.

I can't explain why, I just... I really liked Casey. More so than Alex.

Why do I like salty chips more than sweet chocolate?

I'm just made that way, I guess. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

CASEY NOVAK:

--> How I feel about this character:

Casey was just fun. Like, c'mon, she was balls to the wall insane. From the get go. She had life, she had fire, she didn't give a shit, she played baseball with Elliot and joked with them all, she wanted to get a judge disbarred/arrested, she went to a judge's private home during his poker game and threatened to stay there all night untess he signed her warrant, she took on the entire US army, she got violently assaulted and came back to work the next day expecting to remain on the case and was OFFENDED when they took her off.

Think about all the shit Olivia saw/did/put up with when it came to Elliot, and then look up at that gif, THAT is where Olivia is all "Girl, you're pushing it". When OLIVIA BENSON is holding you back from getting justice, you know you've obliterated a line or two.

But she was also vulnerable and emotional. She cried over little girls in coolers and questioned whether she could remain in SVU, she mourned the boy who committed suicide, she pled out the daughter of the drunken mother because it made Olivia sad. She was scared when she woke up in the hospital. She felt regret over her ex-boyfriend with a mental illness because she had to prioritise herself and he lost control.

She was human.

In a way that, unfortunately, Alex was not able to be, because Alex was created in the year 2000 when police procedural women had to be "professional" and less "emotional". Alex had a very strong hold on her emotions (though they came out on occasion).

Casey? Casey had a hold on ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. And I enjoyed it.

--> All the people I ship romantically with this character:

I don't really ship Casey with anyone. She's a friend. I'd go out drinking with her. But I'm not gonna think about her sex life that much.

--> My non-romantic OTP for this character:

I'm really sitting on the fence here with this ask. I don't know? Like, she got on really well with Olivia and Elliot...

--> My unpopular opinion about this character:

Apart from the one already mentioned?

Is there really that much to opine about Casey? She did her job well (a litte/lot crazy, but she did it). She got results. She had really good chemistry with the entire team.

Perhaps my unpopular opinion is that I would have liked her to either stay or return. Which is a difficult ask, because I also loved Barba.

--> One thing I wish would happen/had happened with this character:

I would love to see Casey return.

If they could ever make up their minds if she was disbarred or not. One episode she is, then she returns to say she was only censured, and then the next time she's referred to, she's been disbarred again.

I mean, knowing Casey, it's also possible she was disbarred for a completely different reason that happened later.

[storiesofsvu]

✨Requests Open!!✨

For the following characters only:

Olivia Benson

Rita Calhoun

Amanda Rollins

Terry Bruno

Anthony DiNozzo

Tara Lewis

Alex Blake

From any of the following prompts!!

(PLEASE copy & paste the full prompt into your ask!)

Master Post of all kinds of prompts

Send is as MANY as you want!! (In seperate asks pls)

Fill up my inbox so I have plenty of stuff to work on!!

(Also accepting angst & smut if you have any awesome ideas! NO smut for Olivia please)

(Pls remember i do not like writing age gaps so yn being a daughter of another character in the fandom is a no for me 99% of the time)

[lizdonnelly]

Second Circle, Ch. 1

Pairing: Elizabeth Donnelly x f!reader, shades of Alex Cabot x Olivia Benson Warnings: Smut, violence, references to alcoholism Summary: “We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.” Based on a request for Liz/f!reader's first time, and my own desire to write a series about Liz navigating romance amidst chaos. Loosely inspired by the events of 2x21 'Scourge' and a few details from 10x8 'Persona'.

---

Although the wind rattled against the windows of the banquet hall and the pinprick lighting of the chandeliers overhead flickered, the murmur of the gala continued on.

The air vibrated, alive with the weight of the tension that had wracked the city in the past few weeks and no doubt fueled by the media machine cranking out headline after headline, each more sordid and gruesome than the last.

Melinda's grip tightened on your elbow as another group approached. Your heart quickened at the sight of short, gelled back blonde hair and the heady perfume that wafted over. Anxiety tore at your stomach with molten claws.

"Doc Warner, glad to see you've made it," a bloodhound of a man said, leading the pack. He gestured towards you with his whiskey glass. "Elliot and Olivia give you enough time to make friends outside the morgue? I must not be pushing them hard enough."

Melinda patted your back. Heavily lined brown eyes scoured you from behind the bloodhound, appraising the manner in which Melinda had touched you. A cold bead of sweat slid down the back of your neck.

"Always glad to see you on the right side of the concrete, Captain," The medical examiner teased. "Especially these days. But yes, believe it or not, I do have time to run in other circles." A man with a voice as calm as the creek that ran beside your childhood home piped up. "Pleased to finally get the chance to meet you," he said with an easy smile and a tip of the head. This man carried himself with a centeredness that was hard to come by, even across the crowd of New York City's top professionals that had congregated that evening. "I've heard about your efforts at Mercy General. I can't imagine what you've had to deal with as of late." It was a line you'd heard plenty of variations of recently, but his sincerity seemed completely genuine. Although his eyes were warm, inviting pools of black ink, you couldn't shake the feeling that somehow he knew. Melinda turned to you with a smile, oblivious. "As you can probably tell, Dr. Huang is our resident psychiatrist," she said. "And a fed, at that," came that harsh, staccato voice you had become attuned to. You bit at the inside of your cheek. The psychiatrist-fed's gentle smirk grew. Thankfully, a pasty, bird boned blonde intruded, reaching out past Huang. "Alexandra Cabot, assistant district attorney," she said, wasting no time.

You shook her hand, surprised at the strength of her grip. Studying her gaze, you got the sense that events like this were easier for her to navigate than they were for other members of the party. She sipped at her champagne lightly and looked around, her stare lingering on the elevators as if she either wanted to leave or wished for someone else to arrive.

"Can't forget her royal highness," the bloodhound Captain joked, gesturing to the woman you'd been struggling not to address.

Dr. Huang spoke again in earthen tones and an air of alacrity. "There's no need to bother, Melinda. The only reason the Bureau Chief wouldn't have led the introductions," he paused, "is if this isn't a stranger to her." Liz rolled her eyes. You subconsciously tugged at the sleeve of the sweater that hung a little past your fingertips. "If you're so perceptive, Agent, then why did a sixth girl show up gutted like a fish at Grand Central this morning?"

---

Liz Donnelly hated courtroom restrooms. She had since the 70's, in fact.

On this occasion, though, she tolerated the lavender soap and the lukewarm water as she used the mirror to study the other woman.

The younger woman next to her scrubbed underneath her nails with a precision so adroit it had to be practiced. "If you're trying to scrub away evidence," the Bureau Chief piped up, "do me a favor and be less obvious." The woman's eyes widened, eyebrows rising. Liz leaned over and tugged playfully at the name tag dangling from the pocket on the woman's scrubs. The woman paused. "If you're trying to flirt with me," she finally whispered, "do me a favor and be more obvious."

The bathroom door swung on its hinges and in strode Olivia Benson, the SVU detective clearly in a tizzy and blind to the way the Bureau Chief and her conversation partner jumped apart like two opposing magnets. The strands on the back of her glossy brown pixie cut stuck up. As the detective ran a nervous hand through them again, Liz understood why.

"Got tired of listening to Cabot try to grill a child? Don't tell me she needs me back in there." Benson shook her head, slumping against the paper towel dispenser. "He got another one."

The detective muttered a quick apology, shifting aside to let the woman in scrubs dry her hands. Liz swallowed thickly.

"Sexually assaulted as well, I take it?" Benson eyed the prosecutor. The detective nodded exasperatedly. "She was an architect. Single, wasn't a user, friends are all model citizens." Benson sucked in her bottom lip and bit at it. "No vengeful ex-boyfriend, at that. Seems she had a gambling habit, but I've know plenty of girls who play the ponies, and all of them are still very much alive."

"However disparate these murders seem, there has to be a connection. Better make good use of that overtime, or you'll have more blood on your hands," Liz jabbed, gesturing towards the sink. The detective's brow furrowed.

"So this is the support we're going to get from our new Bureau Chief? How the hell are-"

Benson paused awkwardly as the woman in scrubs shuffled out the door, paying no mind to the quick finger waggling wave she threw at the prosecutor.

Liz managed a brief smile.

Benson looked towards the door, then back at the wiry woman before her in the starched black pantsuit.

Had there been a window in this particular courtroom restroom, Liz had half a mind to climb out it herself.

---

The bloodhound, whom you now knew as Cragen, thumbed the facets of his whiskey glass at the sound of the announcement.

A gentleman in a well-pressed suit and white gloves had called out across the banquet hall. The gala wouldn't be ending at its scheduled time, due to "inclement weather conditions", meaning the whole ordeal was to proceed for who knows how long. Fortunately, the waitstaff were headed back with fresh bottles and hor d'oeuvres as an apology for the inconvenience.

"I don't mean to pry, but does this have anything to do with-"

He cut you off with a somber shake of his head. He turned to face you, the capillaries webbing along the corners of his eyes swollen.

"This is news to me."

Cragen turned and headed back to the bar with a sniffle.

"They're doing a reasonable job of keeping everyone occupied, at least," came an even voice from behind you. Huang joined your side. Jet black pools still held a mirthful twinkle.

"Tell me something. How long have you and the prosecutor been involved with each other?" "This is the first time Ms. Cabot and I have met," you stammered. "You know that's not who I meant," he countered with a soothing grin. "Forgive my intrusion. You don't have to answer, if you don't want to."

The psychiatrist's musings were an unexpected relief to you. You felt the dam within your chest begin to burst, allowing you to finally speak on something you had kept locked up to yourself these past few weeks. "I'll forgive you, but only if you tell me how you knew," you laughed, tension evaporating from the edge of your voice. Huang nodded to himself.

"That's not your sweater."

You lowered your glass. "It's too long in the arms," he said, gesturing freely. Huang was one of the few who had not been drinking.

"It's not like I have much time to see a tailor," you tried to riposte. "True, but the odds that you and Donnelly wear the same perfume are not favorable," he said with an air of one revealing a royal flush. "My guess is that either she gave the sweater to you, or you're wearing it out of convenience. Alternatively, she could've asked you to wear it, knowing you'd cross paths tonight. She appears to be rather domineering, so that would not surprise me if it were the case."

It took everything in you to fight back the heat that rose in your cheeks at the bounce of his eyebrow.

"You make a hobby out of judging women's perfume?"

"I was a profiler in another life. It was more than a hobby to judge everything about a person." Huang's gaze followed Cragen as he made his way through the crowd across the room.

"Makes for a good party trick, I'll give you that."

Huang paused before turning back to you. His expression held an odd seriousness to it now. "I get the sense that I'm not the only one playing party tricks tonight."

---

Alex Cabot hadn't known Elizabeth for long, but she already didn't care to know the woman much longer.

The younger prosecutor checked her Cartier watch once more, eager for any distraction at this point. Somehow, neither clock hand had so much as budged. She squeezed her eyes shut amidst the bubbling conversation of the crowd in the godforsaken hall and thought of wide, chocolate brown puppy dog eyes and pixie cuts, of handcuffs and coffee cups.

"Alexandra, that look is not becoming on someone like you," an airy tone wafted over.

Lena Petrovsky, New York Supreme Court judge. Fuck. At this rate, she half expected Barry Moredock to round the corner and lecture her about some constitutional disservice she also happened to be encouraging this evening.

"Running all-nighters with the SVU shouldn't be taxing on someone from Harvard Law. But really, you look like hell, try to get some rest after this circus," Petrovsky said, gesturing around them. "You won't be of any use to the city if you keep burning the candle at both ends."

Alex opened her mouth to speak, but a harsh voice speared through her.

"From what I've seen so far, Ms. Cabot is no stranger to circuses," Donnelly jeered.

Alex was certain some snide joke about her courtroom performances was incoming, but she paused, shrieks cutting through the crowd behind them.

---

"This just in: at approximately 11:07 tonight, NYPD discovered the body of a young woman in Central Park. The cause of death? A large wound along the victim's neck, a similar M.O. to the recent string homicides that have shocked the city this past month. Although signs of sexual assault were present, no information is available yet as to the identity of the perpetrator. Investigators have identified the victim as local self-portraitist..."

Liz looped her arm around your shoulders, tugging you out of the bar and onto the street.

"I am not ruining one of the rare nights we both have to ourselves with more of that fear-mongering," she said. You shifted under the weight of the fur coat she shared with you, pressing yourself against her side. Although her voice was firm, you could tell she was rattled. She led you past throngs of men and women in pressed shirts and cocktail dresses, club promoters, and a man stumbling toward you with a box of pamphlets.

"They didn't call me in," you mused. Your brows knitted in confusion. Liz grabbed hold of your chin.

"And they won't," she seemed to command into reality through sheer force of will alone. She brushed her thumb across your lips. Rain gently began to fall overhead. The lights of the cabs clogging the street blurred.

You leaned forward, slipped her thumb into your mouth, and lightly sucked on it.

The prosecutor smirked. You were pleased with the fact that she appeared slightly taken aback by your boldness.

"Come on," she said with a gaze that told you she was a thousand miles away already.

You felt her breath hot against your ear as she tugged you into the back seat of a nearby town car.

"I have something else for you to suck on."

---

"Top her off," Cragen said to the bartender, tilting his glass across the counter.

Across the room, the band still played. The peeling notes of the saxophone reverberated across the inside of his skull. A dull throb continued to pound at the back of his eyes.

Looking down into the amber liquid, Cragen studied the panes of glass that stretched across the ceiling. More rain, more wind.

He couldn't kill in this.

Cragen took a swig.

Elliot and Olivia were still at the station, sifting through tips and folders full of supposed eyewitness accounts. Munch was no doubt trying his best to hold down the fort, but even his endurance, battle-tested over years in Baltimore homicide, was waning.

The brass thought maintaining appearances would comfort the public, although the Captain wondered how all of this pomp and circumstance could reassure anyone but those New York elites with the most fragile of egos.

He took another sip, turning back to watch ADA Cabot and Dr. Huang engaged in what appeared to be a heated argument. At least, heated on the blonde's end. Nearby, Doc Warner was caught in Judge Petrovsky's line of fire. He chuckled into his glass, thankful not to be in the good doctor's shoes.

Further off, Donnelly and the woman Melinda had introduced the group to were headed towards the restrooms. Cragen squinted. The Bureau Chief, with all five foot something's worth of bluster, was leading the other woman hand in hand. Something Arthur Branch had told him once made him chuckle.

Cragen went to take the final swig of his whiskey to finish off the glass, but noticed it was still full.

---

You stumbled through the doorway of Liz's brownstone, her hands quick to pull down your skirt. The door slammed shut. Her mouth pressed hot kisses up the side of your throat. Deceptively strong hands gripped at your ass.

"Upstairs," she husked.

Something fluttered in your stomach. Although you had gotten used to the feeling of the prosecutor's clever tongue in your mouth after a couple coffee dates, the two of you had yet to cross the threshold, so to speak.

Her hands guided you around the corner and up the flight of stairs, toying at the back of your bra. The sensation of her fingers trailing down your spine broke your brain. There could be no anxieties at this point, no thoughts for that matter, only Elizabeth Donnelly and her teeth at your throat and her pillows now pressed up against the back of your head.

The prosecutor leaned over you, nudging your legs aside. She began to drag her knuckle up and down the rapidly dampening fabric that clung to your slit. Heavily lidded brown eyes met yours.

"God Liz, I need you...I need it..."

You were embarrassed at the whine, embarrassed with how wet you already were for the woman.

"Need what?" her voice came coolly. She paused her ministrations to press a finger up against your hole. "This?"

You squeezed your eyes shut. "Please..."

Liz chuckled and hiked up the sleeve of her blazer.

"Since you beg so pretty," she said, "I guess I'll have to oblige."

You felt her tug your panties to the side, the sensation of her pressing a few quick kisses all across your mound and lips sending your heart into a spiral. Shortly afterwards, she helped you kick out of them, and her hands slid up to caress the insides of your thighs. Liz dragged her tongue up through your folds, praising how good you tasted. You moaned unabashedly now, desperation rising to a fever pitch.

"So impatient," she teased from between your legs as she lapped at you. You fought back another whine, the cry dying in your throat as you felt her climb up the bed and tug your body against her. She snaked a hand between your legs and slid a finger into you.

"Fuck, you're tight," her voice strained against a few strands of hair matted against your ear.

Your chest rose and fell rapidly as you tried to reply. "Speak up, sweetheart," she cooed, easing another finger into you.

"I want you to stretch me," you panted, clinging to lucidity.

She bit at your earlobe with a growl, a third finger slipping inside you now. Your head spun at as you felt yourself adjust to take even more of her. The air was now thick with the wet, wanton sounds of her pumping inside you. With each thrust, she stroked at a spot inside you that brought you closer and closer to your peak.

"I-I can't last much longer," you sputtered. You pressed back against her, hips rocking up into her palm. She sucked at a patch of skin underneath your jaw.

"Then cum for me," Liz said, beginning to stroke her thumb along your clit. She curled her fingers inside you and allowed you to roll your thighs against her hand.

The tension gripping your body snapped, your mind careening into the darkness as waves of pleasure rushed over you. Liz kept up her pace, pressing light kisses across your face. She talked you through your orgasm in crisp, honeyed tones in a manner you'd spend the next few days dwelling over.

When your heart finally calmed, she withdrew her hand, savoring the taste of you as she rose up off the bed. You watched her with a confused look, eyes straining against the shadows that cloaked the bedroom.

Her hand threaded into your hair, cupping the back of your scalp. Suddenly, she met you from the side of the bed.

You felt her pull you towards her, your face soon nuzzling up against the fabric of her slacks.

She tugged her zipper open with her free hand.

You wasted no time in starting to cover her panties in kisses, rewarded with a groan as she lolled her head back.

"That's a good girl," she said, voice straining. "Keep it up."

You reached up and tugged them down, lips wrapping around her clit. She laced both hands in your hair, pulling you closer. You leaned up, catching a glimpse of her through heavy lashes.

A thumb caressed your cheek.

"I can't wait to cum all over that pretty face."

You sucked harder.

---

Liz led you towards the restrooms, which were just outside the banquet hall in a hallway not so generously lit. The darkness served the mood well, though. Her mind wandered to thoughts of herself draped over your back, your legs parted wide enough for you to try taking her strap, her hips rutting into you with a ferocity that'd leave you with bruises she was proud to give you.

She wasn't sure if it was the booze or the fatigue calling the shots at this point, but neither prevented her from noticing your hand tugging free from her grasp.

The prosecutor turned in time to catch sight of a white glove cover your mouth.

[foxes-that-run]

Can you confirm Benjamin Button was a gift from Harry?

Hi, Taylor adopted Benji on the set or Me! there’s a special BTS just for him.

However, his role/scene is a reference to internet speculation which Taylor has acknowledged that Olivia was a gift from Harry.

Olivia Benson Swift(-Styles?)

Olivia was adopted on 18 June 2014. Harry and Taylor had started dating again after the red backstage haircut, writing Style around Valentine’s Day 2014 and the anatomical heart tattoo. The date is a potential anniversary:

15 June 2011 Taylor had temper trap arm lyrics in St Paul, 1D in America, Harry MIA and on the 17 June she wrote she was blissfully happy in the lover journal.

16 June 2012 Harry got lyrics from the same temper trap song tattooed on that anniversary.

18 June 2014 Taylor adopted Olivia wearing pink. model Steph Smith was there, posted to IG and started following both Harry and Taylor. Harry MIA but seen in Europe the day before and after.

What led to speculation that Olivia was a gift was that Harry can be heard laughing in the first video Taylor posted of Olivia a week later. This TikTok has Harry laughing and this laugh. Harry’s sister Gemma liked this post and later named her own cat Olivia also.

Olivia is a Scottish fold so it’s unlikely she was able to be adopted same day, my guess is the “first roar” where Taylor wears black, Harry laughs and Olivia looks slightly smaller was before she was picked up where Taylor wore pink. That tracks with clothes and how purebred cat adoptions work, famous people probably have options but kittens new all the time “first roar” means first met. This first roar video is still in Taylor’s instagram stories under “Ladies and Benji”

Harry also wrote Olivia the same year and famously said “Is Olivia even a person or is Olivia an emotion” Olivia being something that sounds like “I love ya”, a response to Say don’t go’s “I said I love you and you say nothing back.

Tumblr went with it which Taylor was aware of as keen user of Tumblr then and she has hinted of Harry as Olivia’s dad on the Reputation tabloid, in the End Game video (black/rep cat rather than Olivia) when she sings she doesn’t want to be just another ex-live you don’t wanna see.

And it was seemingly confirmed in the me! When Brendan presents Benji as a gift while Taylor wears a pink dress

(Side note on the Me Video: Brendan wore Harry’s Live on Tour Suits throughout, she called Olivia and Meredith young daughters (in French, Harry was dating Camille) and the paint at the end match’s the unreleased Two Ghosts video)

And finally on his birthday hits from the streets called Harry a cat daddy in 2019, the year Me! Came out. Well he is a Cat daddy in a double meaning, 🍉 and also Olivia’s real father.

[irishavengersassemble]

Game of Survival: Part 1

After tragedy strikes Rafael Barba’s little sister moves back to New York City for a fresh start. Will she be able to move on with the help of her loving big brother and perhaps find happiness with a certain lieutenant  in SVU.

Hey lovlies. I know its been forever, but I had this idea for a series and I just had to write it. 

Series takes place at the beginning of season 18 of Law and Order: SVU and has references to One Chicago. Reader is canonicallly bisexual and in her mid-thirties. 

Pairings: Olivia Benson x Barba Reader   Sonny Carisi x Rafael Barba 

Header belongs to me. 

You let out a small sigh as you took in the familiar office that you’d not stepped foot in for over a year. Taking in the cozy office of your older brother you settled on the comfy brown couch knowing it would probably be a while before he came back from court.

He was always busy that didn’t mean that he didn’t have time for you, given you lived hours away and you both worked insane hours.

You usually didn’t hear from each other apart from a weekly phone call whenever you both had time which didn’t seem often these days.

Glancing down at your phone your e/c eyes landed on the different apartment listings that you’d been scanning through.

Nothing had caught your eye in all honesty this had been a spare whim of the moment decision one that you’d not regret.

You’d needed a change. A change had been needed for a while and you’d finally decided it was time, time to head home and start over and get a fresh start so to speak.

Severide and Casey had helped you pack up your things over the weekend and you’d made the long drive from Chicago back to New York with nothing but your car and a small U-Haul.

A deep huff fell from your lips as you found the couch growing more comfortable by the minute the long drive catching up with you.

The next thing you knew you were being startled awake as Rafael’s surprised voice filled your ears stirring you from the dreamless slumber you’d fallen into.

“Y/N? Y/N Wake up. What the hell are you doing here?” Your older brother retorts his voice holding so many questions ever the lawyer.

 You groaned opening your eyes finding your big brother of nine years sitting beside you on the couch. He was dressed in one of his well-tailored suits his light brown hair combed back in a neat style.

“Hi, Rafa. Sorry, I fell asleep. It was a long drive. Ummm. I’m back in New York permanently this time. I moved out of Kelly’s place this weekend and drove the twelve and a half hours straight through.” You said knowing your brother was processing what you’d told him his mind was always a step ahead of the conversation.

He knew that the past few years had been hard for you and that ever since the incident you’d been trying to pick up the shattered pieces of your life.

What was left of it. How you’d been able to keep going at all had been a surprise to you.

It was evident the only reason you’d made it this far was the love and support of your family and friends. Those closest to you the people you considered family had helped you through the roughest time of your life they’d helped you pick up the pieces and try to throw your life back together.

Rafael sat there for a moment glancing over at you with a concerned brotherly brow.

He knew it had been hard for you after you’d lost Leslie, you’d been a broken shell of the woman you once were.

The woman who had a ferocity and a fire in you a fierceness that hadn’t dimmed even with the rough life you’d come from had disappeared.

You were softer now than you’d once been quiet and calm, gentle, they’d always been attributes you’d carried yet they seemed to control you these days.

Rafael had been surprised when you’d told him of your plans to go from paramedic to police officer after losing your fiancé several years prior.

He’d worried his mami and abuelita had worried, yet you’d managed to pass through the academy with flying colors and soon became a damn good cop with an even better reputation.

“Well, this is entirely unexpected but it's great to see you Hermana.” Rafael purred pulling you into a tight hug pressing a kiss to your head as you clung to him finding comfort in his embrace.

“I take it you don’t have an apartment or anything settled out yet which is fine. You can stay with me until you find a place.”

“But what about Son-“ You started not at all wanting to impose on your brother and his boyfriend who was over at Rafael’s so much you were surprised that your brother hadn’t asked him to move in yet.

That wasn’t any of your business and you really weren’t the best person to come to when it came to relationships or relationship advice.

Your big brother’s voice filled your ears startling you from your thoughts that had been getting away from you over the past few weeks.

That’s another reason you’d decided to move the city was too different, too quiet, and no matter where you look Leslie was everywhere.

A change had been necessary, you’d wanted to heal actually heal, and being with your family had seemed like the best way to go about that.

“Oh don’t worry about Sonny. You know he loves you. You’ve gotten along. You staying with me won’t be an issue.

I’m sure you’d much rather stay with me than mami anyways.” He chuckled knowing your mother would have his head if she heard his comment.

“Alright, Rafa I’ll stay with you if you insist.” You sighed pulling out of your big brother’s hold rolling your eyes at him.

Rafael could be many things a sassy pain in the ass for starters, but he’d been the best big brother ever since Lucia had taken you in and adopted you when you were eight years old.

Even though Rafael was nine years older he’d always made time for you and though you were close with your mother you and Rafael had been thick as thieves for as long as you could remember.

“I do insist just like I insist on taking you to lunch. Come on. When’s the last time you’ve had a decent meal?” Your big brother quipped raising the infamous Barba brow in your direction.

A sigh fell off your lips Rafael knew you better than anyone having a little sister who was a first responder and working the crazy hours you did you’d often forgotten to eat.

“Last night…” The words tumbled out of your mouth as Rafael’s face hardened giving you a knowing expression forcing a deep huff from your lips as you continue.

“Okay technically it was the night before Herman and the rest of the gang threw me a going away party at Molly’s.” The words tumbled out of your mouth as you stood standing to your feet as Rafael walked you out.

The light brown-haired man rolled his eyes knowing an order of your favorite Chinese food was calling your name.

“Come on let's get some food into you before you blow away or pass out on me.” Rafael sighed throwing an arm around your shoulders as he led you toward the elevators.

“Rafa I’m fine. You act as though I don’t eat. Trust me when I can I do. You know this. I have the Barba genes maybe not literally but metaphorically.

With Abuelita and Mami’s cooking, it was only a matter of time before I become a foodie just like yours truly.” The words tumbled from your mouth as you gave the man a once over followed by your first real smile ever since you’d stepped foot back into your hometown.

“I’m not a foodie.” Your brother sassed knowing that he actually was a foodie and when he’d started dating Sonny that had only intensified. It didn’t help the chatty Italian man was an exceptional cook and one of his main love languages was acts of service.

You were grateful that Rafael had found someone like Sonny, he was warm and loving and made sure that Rafael was taken care of and you appreciated it more than he’d ever know.

It had been hard being away from your family for so many years, but when the opportunity presented itself to move to Chicago alongside joining Firehouse 51 you’d been unable to say no.

Back then you’d been a fresh-faced twenty-four-year-old who was ready to pursue your dream of being a paramedic and saving lives.

Now after a decade in Chicago you were back in New York for a fresh start you knew this would be good for you and that’s what Leslie would have wanted for you as well.

She’d have wanted you to be happy and continue your life not wallowing in the grief that had been all-consuming for the past two years.

You owed it to yourself and you owed it to her to find happiness again. That’s what she’d wanted for you to enjoy living again even with her gone.

It was the only way you knew to keep her memory alive. You needed to start living again and maybe in time you would.

Going out for dinner with your big brother was a good start you felt much calmer as you leant into Rafael’s side glad that you had such a strong support system behind you.

[dannygpino]

There's something I don't understand, many people refer to Nick as Rollins' partner, but he was mostly Liv's partner/she was his first partner. And not many acknowledge that fact.

That's very true.

Their partnership was so fascinating because they butted heads, got into arguments, called each other out in not really constructive ways, but they still had each other's backs. I'm mainly thinking about "Manhattan Vigil" when things were clearly icy between them but when they found Hector's body, they reached for each other's hands.

They obviously were able to work past their differences and become strong partners. They had to open up to each other; her because she was mourning Elliot when Nick arrived and he because he had lone wolf syndrome and was used to being on his own. Of course, they may have disagreed but they still respected and heard each other. They made good partners. They had a close relationship.

Kind of unrelated, I will always love that Cragen said "Find him" to Nick in "Surrender Benson". Of course, the entire squad was going to look for Olivia but I'm sure Nick felt an extra responsibility because she was his partner. He had to look out for her and have her back more than anyone. Cragen knew that. Cragen knew his detectives.

I do hope they reconcile on screen at some point, lol. She called and left a voicemail apologizing but we didn't see his response. Olivia's bridge with Barba is burned, which is another story, but it isn't with Nick. Danny has left the possibility of returning again open. I hope he does. "Hotel Cocaine" just ended, he can do it.

Also, you know what else could happen if Nick did come back?

[kellycalliekell2]

Due to the nature of this blog and the traction it’s been getting, I want to set some rules and expectations I have for those seeing my work.

-First, I don’t want any of my work to be shared on any other social media site. I don’t want the actors I draw, to see my work of their characters in nsfw ways. If I begin to see my work on any other site, or worse, the celeb tagged? I will stop posting uncensored work and only show the censored images. I’ll then move the uncensored stuff to Patreon.

I don’t want to take this to Patreon (yet) as I know not everyone has the means to pay for a membership. I will if it stops the sharing of said work.

-Second. I don’t take requests for the main reason that I believe custom work should be paid for. I’m privileged in that I don’t rely on my artwork for survival, but I know others do, and it’s unfair that I do things for free while they have to work hard to get paid. Also, I don’t really like requests as it stresses me out trying to ensure you’re happy.

-Third. No minors. In truth, I’d prefer anyone with teen in their age to not be on here. I hope that if you are one, you’ll stay away. I ask others to send me the blog names of minors so I can block them.

-Lastly, and this one is just my comfort as an artist. Please don’t refer/tag any of my work as ‘mommy (character name)’. The mommy kink makes me incredibly uncomfortable, and I don’t want my work associated with it.

~~~~~

For those curious on who I’ll work on, here is a list of the actor and their character:

Cate Blanchett:

Hela/Carol Aird/ Lou Miller/ Galadriel/ Lydia Tár/ Lady Tremaine

Gwendoline Christie:

Larissa Weems/ Brienne of Tarth/ Gwen (in fabric)/ Lucifer Morningstar/ Miranda Hilmarson/ Jane Murdstone

Misc characters:

Captain Marvel/ Natasha Romanoff/ Yelena Belova/ King Valkyrie/ Loki/ Bucky Barnes/ Steve Rogers/ Xena & Gabrielle/ Daenerys Targaryen/ Rhaenyra Targaryen/ Olivia Benson/ Harley Quinn/ Barbie/ Diana Prince/

* I will absolutely NOT draw a celebrity as NSFW.*

*All my nsfw will be made to be a likeness of the character, as I want to respect the actors self as much as possible*

~~~~~

My social media if you want to follow me or whatnot. DM me if you have any questions or simply want to know more about me.

Instagram

Main Tumblr

[rahleeyah]

It frustrates me a little when people are like "anyone can draw" bc like I can't, and I can't bc a) my hands are unsteady and often do not do what my brain tells them to do (playing piano was also not for me, my hs bf (theater kid) used to put my eyeliner on for me before plays bc I would stab myself in the eye, etc) and b) I do not have good spatial reasoning and cannot seem to grasp how to construct a drawing, that is like "put a line here, and another line here, and one here, and you'll build up an image" is beyond me (bro I don't even know how far away 3d objects in the real world are I am bouncing off counters like a ping pong ball. Permanently bruised) like no!!! My brain doesn't work that way!! I do not think in clear images - when asked what my OCs look like in fic I do not have an answer unless someone else has suggested a face claim I like - and I simply cannot grasp the steps involved to craft an image with my hands. You can sit me down and try to teach me things - I've taken drawing and painting classes! I'm decent at very simple pottery. I make jewelry but almost always off reference images - and I understand general concepts like scale and perspective but putting it together myself? Nope that's where it falls apart. Don't even get me started on color theory once years and years ago when Tumblr was only on desktop and everybody was using custom themes I painstakingly built one for myself and someone came on anon and told me it looked like the Easter bunny threw up on my blog and my gf at the time, who had my Tumblr password for Reasons, got on my blog in the middle of the night while I was sleeping to rebuild it so it didn't look so heinous (for which I was very grateful) like!! I've gotten handwriting books and I can't even trace the damn letters. Visual art is not my wheelhouse and no amount of theory is going to change the fundamental way in which my brain works and I'm fine with that, actually, bc we cannot all be good at every single thing, that's just not how it works, and I like the things I'm good at and even occasionally play around with the things I'm not (painting, extremely ugly but earnest bullet journaling) bc it's fun but I am under no illusion that what I'll make will be like. Good. And I don't push myself to try to draw bc I know how it'll go, I'm grown enough to recognize my limitations, however. If I had even just an ounce more visual capability, if my hands just did what I told them to, I would try. And when I developed my skill enough to share it with other people, I would be posting drawings of Olivia Benson's titties every day of the week.

[sassyfrassboss]

Well could be that Olivia Benson could be a MentalMeg type character, who knows, but if she been meddles quarter of what MM did & does, I really reallyyy hope that Grosvenor divorces her! They all have a live glorious example of Meghan in how not to let your spouse degrade you & destroy your family connections. They would be COMPLETE fools to not use this as a warning.

I don’t actually know if MM truly does believe she’s better than C, or that’s just what she wants & wants everyone else also to believe b/c her Narc ego cannot take being seen ‘less than.’ I mean b/c no-one (besides the SS) has ever believed that MM is better than PoW, Catherine, in ANY WAY. 🤣🤣

It also really gets my goat that MM always refers to C as “Kate.”

Her referring to Catherine as "Kate" when everyone else calls Catherine "Catherine" is just Meghan's way of condescension.

[agent-troi]

olivia benson reference on only murders in the building!!

[mistandshcdow]

the law and order svu cast except it’s how i refer to them in my head:

olivia benson (questionable icon)

psycho stabler

ICE TEAAAAA

munch munch munch 😋

gay psychologist (does nothing gay ever)

captain crunch

ADA of the week

sexy mortician

[sarking]

2 for the fic rec ask meme !! 💓

🔁 A fic you’ve re-read several times (Fic Recs Ask Meme)

Oh, this one is easy! I have reread many, many things in my bookmarks 😆 So let's do two from different fandoms, shall we?

Paternity is my comfort SVU episode, and I'm not going to say I reread this every time I watch it, but it definitely goes with it sometimes:

Labor (4,180 words) by SheFoundHerself Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Law & Order: Organized Crime (TV 2021), Law & Order: SVU Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Olivia Benson/Elliot Stabler Characters: Elliot Stabler, Olivia Benson Summary: "He can hear Bridget’s voice, the light tone she’d used the afternoon of the picnic because she hadn’t known. She hadn’t known he wasn’t there. He wasn’t there when his son was born. He wasn’t there when it counted." References Law and Order: Organized Crime Season 2: Ep 18. Change the Game and Paternity Bookmarker's Notes:

He should have run from bedside to bedside, from his wife to his partner, making good on his promise to them both, to protect and to serve, for better or for worse.

Really great post-return Elliot characterization. I love that he's saying things he's needed to say for fourteen years, and other things he's needed to say since he got back. It's just so many things I wanted, crammed into one fic that's the perfect length to reread as often as possible.

🔁 🔁

This one I love for a summer day when it feels like roadtrip weather:

A Collision on the Road (16,530 words) by cgb Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Oz (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Tobias Beecher/Chris Keller Summary: "If only it could be like this all the time. Maybe then they'd have a chance.” Bookmarker's Notes:

Toby thinks about calling his mother. He's yet to figure out what he'll say. 'Mom, I've run away to live a life on the lam with my prison lover,' springs to mind. Short and to the point. His mother is beyond the need for sugar-coating.

God, this glimpse at the normalcy that they can never truly have: gifted sunglasses, a trip to the Grand Canyon, a place together. You know how it's going to end, but you still hope.

[lesbenson]

should not have gotten myself started on how much liv doesn’t like herself because now i’ll be here all week.

for 1.0 liv it’s mostly talked about in relation to her parents and her fear that she is just inherently bad. and now post s24e9 there’s also the underlying self-loathing of being in love with a married man (weirdly i think this is more apparent in s7-s9 than 10-12 ? there’s just a lot more conflict about how they’re Too Close but not actually Together with fault and screwed and paternity vs the married era where el liv and kathy have all just accepted the dynamic to a point where liv is much more shamelessly attached to him and vice versa) (livs obsession with keeping his marriage intact was always a big thing but it remains completely insane that liv just. tells amanda about it and says she never had a right. or a claim) and then after elliot left that feeling gets dialed up to a million bc of how easy it seemed like it was for him to just ditch her (referring mainly to scorched earth but applies to all of s13. but the crying in the interrogation room because her heart has just gotten stomped on by “someone else’s husband” was really…)

just. that feeling of inadequacy and constantly being the second choice or the burden that liv feels with all of her really important relationships (the exception maybe being simon who always needs her help but really loves her a lot - but still not unconditionally? she’s his sister and that’s all that he needs to know to love her but he asks a lot in return most of the time) being confirmed when elliot, the one person who doesn’t make her feel like she’s just something to be dealt with, has just cut her off entirely . like how is she supposed to feel normal about herself after that?? knowing that this guy that she loves and felt safe with and considers a good person can only be that good person if he’s nowhere near her???

i’ve said this before but the running theme of people leaving her and borderline blaming her for it drives me up a WALL . haden having to break up with her if they want to keep their jobs and barba and stone leaving svu because of how liv changed (or warped) their worldviews and cassidy’s “you were never gonna bear your soul to me” when he was the one who couldn’t tell her he imagined growing old with her when she asked but tucker moving too fast for her and “i tried, ed”

and then there are just so many. Moments. that get me like her telling baird in justice denied that she looks in the mirror and doesn’t like what she sees (which Does come from a deserved place of guilt lol but it’s so much harsher than what he’s expecting her to say) and then (last reblog) telling lewis she’s not really a “nice girl” when she’s in survival mode and i try to pretend both the lewis and the burton episodes didn’t happen❤️ but the frustration with herself (amaro’s “well physician heal thyself” did not help btw) in the 500th is really. something.

i don’t even know what i’m saying at this point i just think about olivia benson and then think of different ways to die. tldr she needs one of those self love journals

[foxes-that-run]

Timelines and Themes

Tags: Timeline | Photos | Lyrics | Song Analysis | Reputation

Timelines

2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023 and 2024

Dates by Month

Song Analysis

Part 1: 1D/Red - Fine Line/Evermore

Part 2: HH/Midnights onward

Part 3: Unreleased and performed by other artists

Themes and References

Playlists

My Haylor playlist

Another man mix tape summary and playlist

Other

Burton and Taylor

They only talk in song

20 times it was always Haylor

20 and 7

Notebook references

April 29

28 September

Reputation has two parts

William Bowery

A relationship as muse

Harry complimenting Taylor and Taylor saying they’re friends

Olivia benson

People/ships

Larry

About Joe

Matty Healy

Taylor Russell

Waglor

Ed on being real friends

Karlie Kloss

Jewellery and Tattoos

Harry's Rings

Taylors Cartier Necklace

2024 mystery ring

Temper Trap Tattoo, Arm Lyrics and meeting in 2011

Harry and Lt non-Matching Tattoos

Butterfly and handshake tattoos

Cross Tattoo

Infinity Symbols

Taylors braids and chains

Taylor Angel and evil eye rings

Harry's Heart Tattoo and 70 times he kissed it

[irishavengersassemble]

Game of Survival: Part 2

After tragedy strikes Rafael Barba’s little sister moves back to New York City for a fresh start. Will she be able to move on with the help of her loving big brother and perhaps find happiness with a certain lieutenant  in SVU.

Hello Lovelies. Here’s the second part to my new series hope you enjoy.

Series takes place at the beginning of season 18 of Law and Order: SVU and has references to One Chicago. Reader is canonicallly bisexual and in her mid-thirties.

Pairings: Olivia Benson x Barba Reader   Sonny Carisi x Rafael Barba

Header belongs to me.

TW: Mentions of death and child abuse. If this could at all be triggering don’t read. 

“I love you.” Leslie purred her tender blue eyes full of warmth and love as you lay in bed curled up together listening to the intense thunderstorm that was going on outside.

It had been a long day and the two of you were relishing in the joys of being home in your shared apartment.

“I sure hope you love me. I mean you did propose.” You exclaimed feigning shock as Leslie took your hand pressing a kiss to the lovely ring that she’d put there last year in early autumn.

The proposal had come out of nowhere.

It had been unexpected something you’d not anticipated even though you and Leslie had been in a loving committed relationship for the past three and a half years.

Leslie had planned a weekend trip for the two of you it had been a lake house that was several hours away from the city.

It was quiet secluded the perfect place for a couples getaway.

After a hike in the early hours of the morning which you’d spent most of the time grumbling about going out before having had your morning coffee ever the Barba in you.

When Leslie had stopped you’d figured she was stopping to tie her shoe or had seen a random stray dog off the trail instead of either of those things when you’d turned to look at her she’d disappeared.

After hearing her clear her throat you’d glanced down to find her on one knee with the most beautiful ring you’d ever seen.

She’d asked you to marry her right then and there and you’d startled the both of you tackling her in your excitement sending you to the ground in nothing but a heap of tangled limbs.

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I can’t wait to be your wife.” Leslie had told you her eyes shining with that warm spark that seemed to fill them whenever she’d look at you.

“And I can’t wait to be yours.” You hummed tucking a strand of her bright blonde hair behind her ear as you leant forward pressing a soft kiss to her lips as she let her forehead rest against yours.

You woke with a start the memory turned dream feeling much too real.

Your hands automatically reached across your bed feeling for Leslie finding her spot missing just as it had been for the past two years.

It didn’t matter a different city a different bed no matter where you went you still reach for her; your heart ached you missed her and everything that she’d been.

She’d been your heart, your home, your everything and in a matter of seconds she’d been taken from you gone in an instant.

You felt sick your stomach clench as flashes of your blood-strained hands filled your mind. You’d done everything you could and it hadn’t been enough.

Sitting up in bed you glanced around your empty bedroom taking in the various boxes you’d yet to unpack.

 Three weeks had passed since you’d arrived in New York and after staying with Rafael for about a week you’d found the place you were in now.

It wasn’t the most lavish apartment, but it was comfy, in your price range, in a decent area and close to Rafael’s apartment and the precinct you’d started working at.

You’d been placed in Narcotics and although it hadn’t been something you’d expected to like after working for the past few years on the streets of Chicago you’d been enjoying it so far at least.

Being a cop is something you’d never pictured yourself doing, but after losing Leslie in such a horrific accident it had seemed like the obvious thing to do and so far you’d not regret your choice whatsoever.

You liked making a difference and keeping those around you and your city safe. It was a learning curb just like all things.

A sigh fell from your lips as you glanced at the clock on your nightstand the number’s in bright red filling the darkness of the room.

It was only five in the morning, on your day off no less, but going for a run sounded like the best course of action you knew if you stayed home you’d end up lost in your head too much.

That was never a good thing you’d end up stuck in the past and replaying what could have been scenarios that always made your head feel heavy and like someone was holding you underwater.

Throwing on a pair of leggings you put on a sports bra and a t-shirt before throwing your long h/c hair into a quick ponytail and brushing your teeth.

You grabbed the proper outer gear given it was January and New York was still as freezing as it had been when you’d left it.

About an hour later you found yourself running through an open trail that was close by Central Park the air was cool and filled your lungs.

This trail had been something you’d enjoyed whenever you’d come back to New York to visit your mami, Abuelita, and Rafael it was also a place you’d taken Leslie so she could run with you until she’d bribed you to head back to your hotel after grabbing some bagels from a bakery close by.

It was comforting being back here New York called out to you in a way Chicago never had it was in your blood.

Even after nearly a decade away the New Yorker in you felt calm, relaxed, and safe you felt like a prodigal daughter finally returned to her rightful homeland.

It was nice having your family so close instead of a phone call or flight home you could go visit them basically anytime you wanted.

It was now close to noon.

You’d finished your run before heading back home. You’d showered and gotten dressed in a pair of jeans and a black-sleeved shirt that fit you well.

After making breakfast which consist of an espresso, some eggs, and sourdough toast you’d thrown your hair up and focused on cleaning up your apartment.

There were quite a few boxes to still go through you’d just finished hanging up a few photos in your living room when a soft knock sounded on your door.

Raising a curious eyebrow you made your way over to your door staring out the peephole you found Rafael standing outside your door he had two coffee’s in hand and a pastry bag under his arm.

“Who is it?” You called knowing that would most likely get a rise out of your big brother over anything.

“Y/N I know that you already looked to see who it is. Will you please let me in its freezing out here.” The light brown-haired man huffed rolling his eyes as you unlocked the chain on your door opening it so the man could make his way through which he did.

“Hola Hermana. I brought some of those cream cheese Danish’s that you like from that bakery downtown.” Rafael purred pressing a kiss to your cheek as he removed his shoes setting the coffees and pastry bag on your coffee table before removing his coat and scarf placing them on the coat rack beside your door.

He sighed rubbing his hands together before blowing into them trying to warm them up even with the coat and scarf his nose and ears were red clearly from the cool winter air.

“It looks good in here. You’ve clearly been busy.” Rafael hummed his green gaze taking in the neat and tidy apartment which had looked like a storage factory had blown up in your living room the last time he’d been over.

He took a seat on your couch settling into the long leather black couch that he and Sonny had been kind enough to help you rearrange when you’d first moved in.

“Yes, I have its called not wanting to live in a storage area as opposed to a home.” You scoffed taking a seat beside the Cuban man you tucked your legs underneath you taking the coffee cup that had your name scrawled on it.

“Thank you for the coffee and food. It's appreciated.” The words tumbled out of your mouth as you snatched the bag before Rafael had time to grab it. You pulled out one of the Danish’s taking a big bite before humming in delight.

“Holy shit! I swear these have gotten better since I last had one.” You all but groaned savoring the delicious bite before you took another.

Your big brother scoffed his eyes saying it all as he quipped.

“Do you need a minute alone with that thing? Geez, that should be a heinous crime in itself.” He teased grabbing his own pastry taking a bite that put yours to shame.

“Wow! Okay Mr. Garbage Disposal.” You huffed jabbing him in the elbow which emit a yelp from his lips.

“Hey! That’s rude on all accounts. Just keep it up and I just might sue you for assault and hate speech.” He sassed as he took a sip of his coffee letting out a content sigh as he enjoy his beverage.

“Okay… go for it. Good luck getting anything out of me with my salary.” You retort knowing you had him there given your big brother, yes, he was an exceptional lawyer, but he also made a really decent salary especially compared to you.

You and Rafael sat there for a few minutes in silence as you finished your danishes and enjoyed your coffee. Finally unable to handle the deafening silence you look at the Cuban man trying to read his expression.

You’d always been good at reading him it was something you’d always been able to do well pick up on little key things, people’s moods how they ticked.

What had started out as a coping mechanism as a way to handle your addict mother and abusive stepfather as a child had become something you now used every day on the job.

Reading people had once been about your own survival and now it was something you used to help keep others safe.

Letting out a small sigh you brought your coffee to your lips before your e/c eyes met Rafael’s intense green.

“Alright, Rafa spill. Why are you here? I know you’ve been insanely busy with your schedule and everything and it's not like you to just visit me out of the blue. Especially this time of day.”

Part of you worried for your pain in the ass big brother had he and Sonny broken up, had something happened at work, was he being threatened, or was he just being his typical overprotective self just as he’d been even before you’d been adopted by Lucia all those years ago.

From the time you were small Rafael had always made sure you were okay; he’d understood what it had been like living in an abusive household and being bullied as a result.

Luckily for Rafael and Lucia, Rafa’s father had been out of his life several years before you’d entered their family.

Still, the scars were still there for both of you metaphorically and in your case literally.

Your entire back was covered tiny circular scars cigarette burns to be specific all compliments of your asshole stepfather.

Rafael set down his coffee his tender yet worried eyes meeting your curious ones.

“I just… I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. I know the past two years have been hard on you and I just wanted.

I want to make sure everything is alright. Or as alright as it can be. Losing people you care for and love is difficult.”

“Raf, what’s going on?” “Is this about the detective you lost recently? I know how hard that was for so many of you, especially Sonny.” You acknowledged having heard recently that one of the detectives that Rafael worked with had been killed in the line of duty.

Unfortunately, it happened all too often much more than it should have. That was life though people are born and they die and when it's someone’s time there’s nothing anyone can do.

You of all people understood that you’d done everything and then some to save Leslie’s life and in the end, it hadn’t been enough you’d still lost her.

“Yes, and no Dodd’s death was so sudden and even though I didn’t really know him well. It was rough for Sonny and the rest of the detectives.

It's tragic when someone dies especially someone so young who had so much to offer the world.” Rafael mused before continuing.

“It’s terrifying knowing that my baby sister the one who’s brought so much joy into our lives. Goes out every single day and puts her life on the line.

I just want you to be careful Y/N. Please promise me you’ll be careful.” Rafael acknowledged his voice softer as he reached over grabbing your hand giving it a brotherly squeeze.

“Rafael… I know better than most losing one of your own can have a detrimental effect on a person. Losing Leslie was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. You have to know that I’m going to be careful. I am.

I always have been but these things aren’t always in your control. I know you’re scared of losing me, Rafa. I’d be concerned if you weren’t.” You purred letting out a small sigh as your big brother just rolled his eyes at your comment.

It had been so hard for Rafael when your Abuelita had died she and Leslie had died about a year apart and you knew to this day the guilt was eating your big brother alive.

You understood that he still struggled with it and you knew that he couldn’t lose anyone else close to him.

The squad at SVU losing one of their own had probably brought up a lot of unopened wounds for your big brother not to mention fears as well.

Not only were you a cop, but so was Sonny.

The happy-go-lucky chatty Italian man loved your brother so much and you knew that he loved him in return.

You really didn’t know what Rafa would do if he lost you or Sonny it would crush him.

Your coffee was forgotten at the moment you held out your hand holding up your pinky as Rafael just watched you letting out a huff knowing where this was going.

Ever since you were small you and Rafael had this thing where if you had a really important promise to make you’d pinky swear on it.

It's something he’d done ever since you’d been that scared broken lost little girl who’d come into his and Lucia’s lives and hearts.

As a means of helping you feel better, he’d started with pinky promises making sure to tell you that they were magic and once someone pinky swore with someone it was like magic forever binding and something that couldn’t be broken no matter what.

“Really Y/N don’t you think we’re a little old?"

"Rafael come on don’t be such a baby.” The words tumbled from your lips as your brother groaned knowing there was no way out of this.

It was his fault too he’s the one who’d started doing it.

“Fine, what are we pinky swearing on?” He questions waiting for you to continue.

“Barba to Barba… I promise I’ll do everything I can to make sure I’m careful on the job and I expect you to do the same.” You started when the light brown-haired man opened his mouth.

“I’m always careful.” He scoffed rolling his eyes at you once more.

“Okay, Mr. nearly got strangled to death in court.” You confirmed before Rafael grabbed your pinky linking it with his.

“That was one time and I put that son of a bitch away so it was worth it.” Your big brother got out sassily ever the sassafras master if you’d ever seen one.  

“I’m careful, but I promise to not put myself in impending danger unless I think it’s necessary to help or protect a victim.” He added running a hand through his light brown hair.

“That’s fair. Given I’d do the same although usually, I have a bulletproof vest. So please be careful.” You hummed as you pinky swore before unhooking your fingers with his.

“Alright hurry up and finish your coffee so you can help me put together that Ikea bookshelf I just got.Those instructions are a bitch.” You retort watching as Rafael grumbled under his breath he hated putting furniture together and you knew it.

“Oh quit your whining I’ll take you and Sonny out for dinner this weekend as a thank you. If none of us have a major case that is.” You muse knowing that either of you getting a case that ran over the weekend was highly likely.

“You’re lucky I love you.” Rafael sighed taking a long drag of his coffee.

“What’s not to love?” You smirked knowing it was going to be a long afternoon with your loving yet grumpy big brother.

[causewhywouldnti]

My thoughts as I’m watching 24 seasons of law & order svu:

Season 11

Protective Elliot in 11x01, and Benson having none of it.

11x02, Benson and Stabler enjoyed looking for the Master Baiter way too much. Stablers look of shock when his date referred to him as daddy. I’m enjoying the Stabler/Paxton interactions. The daughter is a psycho, just saying.

11x03, Stabler totally pushing the dirty work on Munch and Fin. One thing I like about Stabler, he realizes when he did something wrong and apologizes. And he gets injured again. Paxton threatening Benson not to hurt the man who injured Stabler. I really did not need the cockroach scene. But it must have been fun to act the solitary confinement scene.

11x04, still enjoying the Stabler/Paxton hate. That simulated video doesn't seem ethical (I mean, the one with his face photoshopped on it). Ouch, Cragen bringing up Benson's mother alcoholism. I kind of thought that she would show the wrong video at the hearing. Oh, I want to know what that look meant between Benson and Stabler when Paxton started to get handsy with Stabler. Drunk Paxton at the court is just sad. Scott Foley is just a good actor (even though nobody cares Sean, nobody cares). Stabler came very close to swearing there.

11x05 Stabler is getting hurt again. Cabot is back again. ADA Elliot, is a fun thought, he didn't even blink. Stabler is really good with the kids. That child is gonna be scarred for life.

11x06, Porter is back. Stabler ruining all of Porter’s flirting attempts, shit eating grin and all. Stabler still can’t take a shot when Olivia is in danger. Morales knows what’s up, as soon as Porter appears, he closed everything.

11x07, dude straight up just winked at Benson and Stabler when they introduced themselves. Huang always feels personally insulted when a psychiatrist is involved.

11x08, totally on Richard's side, wouldn't want to be called Dickie either. Not sure Benson is any better than Stabler to interview these people. Anger issues seem to run in the Stabler family. That interrogation must have been awkward. Dickie really isn't pulling any punches this episode. The discussion at Elliot's desk actually makes sense, I do wonder what event Dickie referenced, when he accused Elliot of losing his mind. Benson and Stabler really hell-bent on proofing Paxton’s statement right. Wonder if Cragen really would get dropped if there’s another problem. Ah, the stomach compressions again. I mean, I get it, can’t really do chest compressions on an actress, because it could get awkward. And I said this before, but I really appreciate, that Stabler realizes when he made a mistake and tries to make it right.

11x09, Stabler taking care of Benson is really sweet, and I want her wearable blanket. Munch is that annoying friend who points out grammatical errors. Stabler attempting to kick in the door is kinda funny. Tucker will be back, won’t he? Munch trying to make Olivia feel better by telling her how horrible she looks. And here comes Tucker, don’t think this episode is going to make me like him more. Stabler is not happy with him either. Benson seeing right through Tucker when he tells her Stabler revealed information to him. Just an observation, Benson’s necklace is tighter during her interrogation than it usually is. Stabler really out there mortgaging his house for her. And I’m very sure he did not tell Kathy about it. Of course, Stabler is checking in on Benson. I did not know that you could fabricate DNA, though nothing about that can be found since 2009. Poor Callahan. I really would have liked it, if Harrison had actually been someone from a past season.

11x10, Fin is not wrong, when he tells Cragen that Benson and Stabler get to bend the rules. Munch again on the grammar control. Cabot really going after the dude in court. Well, that was a surprise ending.

11x11, that opening is just harrowing. But the grandpa is a really good guy.

11x12, Benson and Stabler being referred to as Cragen's pet detectives seems right. Stabler isn't handling it well, when Benson works with someone else. That shooting was so fake. But at least the heiress was convinced. Yep, Elliot does not like having Ash around. I commented on Beck’s good french, so i gotta comment on the heiress’s bad French.

11x13, Stabler gets injured, again. At least Benson looks after him. Babs saying Stabler has the hots for Benson, and her response being that’s never gonna happen, is really not addressing Babs accusation. The editing after the non-kiss is really weird. Probably because there actually was a kiss. Love that Benson tells the next cop to stay outside the apartment. So, does Stabler actually get a gay vibe from Benson? Stabler caught on to her interrogation tactic really quick! Benson is enjoying the Babs-Stabler kiss way too much.

11x14, that prayer scene is just really weird.

11x16, okay, so the cops irritation of the victim is very understandable. Olivia does not react well to Cragen telling her to do some sweet talk. I really liked Cabot in this episode. Nardeli's story was just sad. I felt Cabot's second exit was actually well set up and executed.

11x17, the scene where Elliot gives Olivia the car (?) keys is very domestic.

11x18, Benson undercover, that guy is a creep!!! Benson agrees. Stabler is enjoying those mattress ads a bit too much. The suspect, assuming Stabler was there for sex and immediately jumping to a threesome when Benson showed up, might be my new favorite suspect. Never heard AF be referred to as "my friend", neither did Stabler, apparently. Suspect might be my fave, but girl is weird, especially keeping the sheets with menstrual blood for 35 years. I assumed the mattress guy wasn't dead when the detective didn't let them into her apartment, still appreciated the twists though.

11x20 has Liv undercover and Elliot saving her, 11x22 has Benson and Stabler undercover as a married couple.

11x23 I enjoy Elliots bad jokes. Does Marlowe walk around with a huge stain on her blouse, or is that a pattern? I honestly can’t tell… I really don’t know why, but the son's confession was a real déjà vu, I thought I heard that word for word in an earlier episode. Might be because I’ve been binging this series for 2 months now.

11x24, Surprisingly, when Benson was out cold, Stabler actually took care of the suspect first. Kinda sad that we didn't get to see him checking on her. Not a fan of Warner. Getting shot, but her saying to get the sterile gaze and then immediately putting it on the ground if funny to me.

The first half of the season was really good, second half had it's moments.

Familiar faces: Wentworth Miller (Prison Break), Christine Lahti (Studio 60), Eric McCormack (Will&Grace), Scott Foley (Scrubs), Chris Chalk (The Newsroom), John Larroquette (House), Bruce McGill (NCIS), Thomas Sadoski (The Newsroom), Sarah Paulson (Studio 60), Nathan Lee Graham (Sweet Home Alabama), Naveen Andrews (Bride & Prejudice), Dennis Boutsikaris (House), Kathy Griffin, Richard Burgi (Desperate Housewives), Eric Lange (Fringe), Quinton Aaron (Blind Side), Renée Taylor (The Nanny), Morgan Fairchild (Friends), David Paymer (Ocean‘s Thirteen), Raphael Sbarge (OUAT) and D.W. Moffett (Switched at Birth).

Favorite Episodes: 11x03, 11x06, 11x08, 11x09 and 11x13

Favorite lines:

"I have great bedside manner." - Stabler 11x03 (not sure if he does)

"Without gallows humor, to cope with what we see every day, I’d go stark raving mad." "What do you mean go?" - Munch and Fin 11x04

"Ever sleep with your partner, Detective?" - Dickie 11x08

"They’re (Benson & Stabler) good cops. But their loyalty is to each other, not to you." - Paxton to Cabot 11x08, truer words have never been spoken.

"It’s all fun and games until someone loses a penis." - Cragen 11x09

"Are you interrogating me for murder, or are you signing me up for a dating service?" -Benson to Tucker 11x09

(Talking about the handcuffs) "I’m sorry they’re not diamond encrusted, but the Bedazzler, it went AWOL." - Stabler to an heiress 11x12

(Holding up her bulletproof vest) "Your dry cleaner have anger issues?" - Stabler to Benson 11x12

"Your attacker, was he black, white, Hispanic?" "I don’t know, I don’t know. I didn‘t ask." - Benson and a victim 11x16