#Ri/Davan

[azimuth-only-one-ill-follow]

You Questioned Our Determination

Ri sighed softly and stretched, turning himself over onto his belly and pillowing his head in his arms. Davan chuckled lightly and tucked a blanket around the slighter man in an attempt to keep him warm. Ri huffed and wriggled, working the blanket down to around his hips. He was still quite warm from their very enthusiastic and athletic romp, and for now, the blanket was more suffocating than comforting.

Davan fell silent then, and Ri made a curious noise. It wasn’t like Davan, who was more like his old self in these calm moments. Moments where he didn’t feel the weight of his choices and the prices they took. Moments he could still muster his youthful enthusiasm and exuberance. Moments where they were both too tired and too happy to remember that life had already happened to them, and that the future was no longer infinite.

It wasn’t that Exile’s Rest tied them down, not like their home village had, but it was still a ponderous millstone around Davan’s neck, keeping him firmly anchored in the here-and-now. It was a beloved burden that required careful tending, like a garden too delicate to allow one to travel. Like a sick child, or sheep in wolf country, or a river with beavers. An important and precious blessing that required constant upkeep and commitment.

Cities were not for apathetic dreamers.

Still, these were moments Ri could eke out where Davan would set that burden down. It had near instantly endeared him to Caedecus (so named by the slavers who first discovered his prodigal healing talent and divine favour), who had spent much of the last ten years convinced his liege and dear friend would work himself into an early grave. Caedecus was Ri’s favourite council member for the same reason: no matter how much Davan insisted all of them were his good friends, Caedecus was the only one who seemed to care more about Davan’s physical health than about what he could do for others.

Davan neatly sidetracked that thought by brushing his fingers soothingly over Ri’s back. It was such a nice feeling that it took far longer than it should have to notice Davan was following a pattern. A very clear pattern, now that Ri had noticed it.

Davan’s hand was shaking.

“Azimuth?” Ri questioned, turning slightly so he could see his love. This was likely the sort of conversation he was going to need visual clues to navigate.

Davan ducked down, out of Ri’s line of sight, and pressed a soft kiss to the worst of the raised marks lining his back. He couldn’t help the pleased hum that came from him at that, even though he knew it wasn’t entirely appropriate. 

“What happened?” The rumble of his voice was soft in a way that Ri knew was meant to let him know he didn’t have to answer, but this wasn’t a secret. It had never been a secret.

It had been a counterstrike.

“The amount of malice it takes for six grown men to plot the murder of a boy doesn’t just vanish when the target does.” He replied just as softly, though there was steel underlying his words. He knew this would hurt Davan, but also knew he needed to know anyway. “I was… reminded of why it was a poor choice to defy my father.”

Davan sucked in a sharp breath, then gently placed his forehead against Ri’s back in penitence. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not.” Ri replied, blunt and calm. “When I said I’d never count the cost, I meant this too. I’d have borne far more than just this momentary pain for your safety, Azimuth. My only regrets are what happened to you, not what happened to me.” He flipped himself over, then grabbed Davan’s startled face in his hands. “This was not your doing. All you did was love me, and I will never allow that to be called a mistake.”

Davan brought his own hand up to cup one of Ri’s, then kissed the palm. “I’m still sorry it happened to you. You deserved more than him.”

Ri smirked up at him. “Everyone deserved more than him. He’s a pathetic waste of time and space who made everyone’s life worse for being in it, and I’m delighted that he’s now facing the decline of his physical prowess, the complete annihilation of his power base, the end of his vaunted lineage, and the fact that he knows I did it to him. That your influence alone was enough to turn his bred and raised perfect lackey into the instrument of his destruction. That your kindness was all it took to turn his attack dog back around to him, and that it was his brutality that destroyed his life in the end.”

Davan smiled down at him, hopelessly fond. “You’re so much more than that, Ri. I’ve always known that.”

“I’m more than that because you rescued me from the cage he was keeping me in.” Ri insisted, knowing it was true. “All of the good in me is simply a reflection of you. Without you, I would be nothing but a weapon.”

Davan shook his head fondly, then grew pensive. “I think you are kinder and more merciful than you believe, but I admit it concerns me that your father and his cronies might make more trouble now that you are not there to oppose them. I know you trust Edith to corral them, but six against one is unfair for anyone.”

Ri blinked at him. “What do you mean, six on one? All I left Edith to contend with was one broken old man, his legacy in ruins and his silver tongue tarnished from the exposure of his evil lies. She is more than a match for him, and even if she wasn’t I have burned too many of his bridges for him to rebuild.”

Now it was Davan’s turn to blink in surprise. “What happened to the rest of them?”

Ri shrugged. “I killed them.”

*

Sargent Liura strode into the hall, flanked by High Priest Caedecus and Archmage Idala. “This nonsense ends now.” She hissed out, causing Davan’s shoulders to set stubbornly and Derick to turn his big, blue puppy dog eyes her way. This time she had brought reinforcements, as Idala would back Davan even if he were wrong, and Caedecus was Derick’s most vocal supporter in the city. If these two idiots couldn’t get over themselves enough to have a reasonable discussion about this, then Liura would let Idala and Caedecus argue it in proxy. The last time they had let something fester as badly as this was, it had only ended when Derick had nearly died in battle.

No one was dying today, however. Not unless she killed them out of pure frustration.

She gestured around her, and her two chosen seconds moved to flank the men they were there to defend. Derick eyed the High Priest in wary confusion, while Davan smiled easily at one of his closest friends. Liura drew herself up to her full height, demanding all the attention in the room once again. “We are here,” She intoned solemnly, “To sort out the issue that is currently destabilizing the city. The Lord Protector has been distracted and prickly, and his temperament is mirrored by the city as a whole. It needs resolving.”

Derick nodded, his mouth firming with agreement and understanding. It was Davan, of course, who protested. “Liura, really, I am perfectly capable of managing my emotions and my affairs on my own. You don’t need to keep inserting yourself into them.”

It was Caedecus, surprisingly, who spoke up. He was the most mild mannered and easy going of the council, due to his time as a slave making him terrified of even his own authority. “Davan, please. You don’t eat, or sleep, or even train like you usually do. Headaches aren’t unusual for you, but you’ve had one three out of every four days for a fortnight now. The whole city is on edge as ripples of your ill temper and haggard appearance spread to all corners. It’s so clear to us all that you hate arguing with Derick. Please, won’t you let us help?”

Two pairs of beseeching eyes met his, and Davan’s displeasure collapsed like a snow fort in the spring. “Oh, all right. Let’s get this over with.”

Liura turned towards Derick, deciding easily to start with the compliant one. Davan was much more likely to explain his side if he felt like he was rebutting Derick’s explanation than if he was just asked his defence first. She nodded. He shrugged.

“Davan doesn’t like that I murdered five people in cold blood with no trial. No effort was ever made to bring them to justice in a more reasonable manner, and I’m not sorry I did it.” He asserted, blue eyes blazing. 

She nodded once, then turned to Davan.

“Ri has admitted to choosing violence as his foremost problem solving technique without a concern for due process, fairness, or consequences. That makes him a dangerous liability, especially when he will not accept that this circumvents all the tenets this city is built on, or promise not to do it again and to allow the law to work as it should.” He rebutted decisively, proving once again that when these two argued this badly it was usually because they were arguing about different things at the same time.

She turned back to Derick, who was now looking just as stubborn as Davan. “Why did you never attempt to solve this through the usual means?”

“They were the source of the corruption in our hometown, and between them held the majority of the power in the town. Besides, I didn’t need a trial to know they were guilty. I heard them plotting to lynch Davan with my own ears. It’s why I falsely accused him of impropriety in the first place.” His voice rang clear, and it was obvious he was proud of his actions, not just accepting of them.

“Ri, that’s exactly the problem.” Davan burst in, frustrated and deeply bothered. “My point is that death should never be the default solution, and that you treat it far too casually.” He reached out to his lover, clearly imploring. “I’ve killed people myself. I know. Every death damages your soul in some way. Sometimes…” He hesitated then, and a dark cloud passed over his own expression. “Sometimes in a way that never heals.”

Derick was up in a heartbeat, crossing the room only to gather the renowned Lord Protector of Exile’s Rest up against his chest like he was comforting a child. It was truly something to see. “I don’t know who you killed that left this mark on your mind, Azimuth, but I am sure they deserved it. I trust your judgement. And as for my own killings… Dear One, I have killed exactly nine people. Most of them I can name, and all of them actively intended to kill you. I do not regret their deaths in the slightest, as killing them made things safer for you. I will not promise to stay my hand if you are in danger, but that has so far been the only thing I have killed for.”

Davan was silent at that, but Liura wanted to dig a little deeper into this. Otherwise it would continue to weigh on her friend’s mind.

“When did you decide to kill the first one? And how did you do it?” She asked, leaning slightly forward in her curiosity. 

Derick shrugged. “I didn’t really decide, I just did.” He replied. “I was so very furious with them all for plotting against Davan, and my back was still wrecked, so I snuck out to go down to our hidden spot by the river. Jeremiah followed me, kept trying to feed me the mead he brought, and eventually tried to grope me. I was so disgusted with him I just kicked out his bad knee, grabbed the back of his head, and drowned him. Everyone assumed he got drunk and fell in, even my father. That was when I realized I could get rid of them all in supposed accidents, and the only one that might catch on would be my father. By then, though, I’d already have turned the public opinion tide. It became my purpose in life, as retribution for ever seeking to harm Davan.” He looked down and pulled Davan’s dark head further in, curling about the bigger man in an obviously protective gesture. “I didn’t think he’d ever find out about it, though. I didn’t think I’d ever see him again.”

“Ri, I…” Davan began, but Liura had heard enough. While Derick might place Davan’s wellbeing too highly, Davan himself most definitely placed it too lowly.

“What if we remove Davan from the question?” She interrupted. Both men turned to look at her.

“It’s a matter of principle, Liura, changing the details doesn’t fix that.” 

“Why on earth would we do that?” 

They spoke over each other, united in their opinion that the suggestion was a stupid idea.

Liura, however, didn’t care what they thought of her idea. She was going with it anyway. “We remove Davan from the equation. What we’re left with is a traumatized and brutalized adolescent who had saved another youth at great personal cost who was still actively being harmed by the grown adult aggressors. During an attempted rape related to the first attack he defended himself, resulting in the death of the attacker. He then realized that he had the power to prevent them from hurting others, and he used it. Are you really going to stay mad at that child for seeking revenge, Davan? Or at the adult he became for not regretting those deaths? And Derick made a good point as well: His hands are much cleaner than either of ours.”

Davan’s brow creased in contemplation that rapidly shaded to unhappiness as he considered the situation from that point of view. She could almost see the moment he realized he agreed with her.

Derick, on the other hand, immediately and predictably lept to Davan’s defence.. “Don’t you say that about Davan!” He insisted. “His soul is the sort of incandescent that no mortal sin could tarnish. It is definitely brighter than mine.”

“Ri.” Davan whined, burying his face in one hand while the other snuck around to hold his lover close. Liura was sure his ears would be red if she could only see them. “That’s… Entirely incorrect. You have no idea what I’ve done in the years since we were youths. Liura knows that part of me better than you. I’ve killed… many, many more than your nine.”

“You’ve done what you needed to.” Derick insisted, his whole focus back on Davan. “Only what you needed to, with the needs of those around you and the best interests of all involved kept at the forefront of your mind. I know you did, because you could never have done otherwise. Even as a mercenary I know you were never needlessly cruel or gleeful about your skill. You were backed into a corner and did all you could to survive, and to keep those around you alive as well. I need no proof of it, but if you do consider this: Why did you leave the field as soon as you were able? Why found this city? Why fight so hard to give everyone as lost and hurt as you a safe place to heal and grow? When I say mortal sins cannot dull the brilliance of your soul I mean it. This includes the deaths you have dealt.”

“How about we let the Gods worry about their own scales?” Caedecus broke in, beaming at the both of them. “Their ways are not for mortal comprehension, and I feel both of you have no need to worry about that reckoning.” He reached out to lay a gentle hand on Idala’s shoulder, heedless of the sparks the Archmage was throwing out. “Instead, why don’t we head out to the practice field so Idala can let off some of her anger? I would rather not treat anyone for burns if I don’t have to, and now that she’s heard some details about who was targeting Davan when he was young and helpless she’s liable to burn the keep down.”

“An excellent idea.” Liura replied, striding towards the door. “Not you two, though!” She threw back as Davan made a move to stand up. “You stay here and have a moment. I think, after the last few weeks, you need it.”

*

“Azimuth?” Ri eventually questioned, running his hand through Davan’s hair. Even the echoes of the others had faded long before, but the taller man had made no move to react in any way. “Are you well?”

“I… Don’t like that Idala is upset. She doesn’t need to be. I’m fine.” He replied. Ri sighed, knowing this was going to be an ongoing discussion.

“She’s upset for you because she loves you. Like I do, like Caedecus does, like Liura does, like your whole city does. You’re easy to love, and so, so worth it. Even when it makes us sad or angry.” Ri explained, even though he knew Davan wasn’t ready to accept that truth.

“I don’t want anyone to get hurt because of me.” He insisted, and Ri couldn’t help but drop a sweet kiss on his head.

“I know you don’t, Azimuth, but we will. We gladly will. You deserve to be part of a better world than anything on this mortal plane can offer. We all know that. And we all love you for trying to make the world become that better version. Even if it fails, that vision is worth fighting for. You are worth fighting for. You remind us even on the bad days that things can be better, and you leave them that way in your wake just by touching the lives that you do and changing them for the better. I know you don’t see it as enough, but it’s so much more than anyone else can do.” He kissed him again, then tightened his grip. “Just… let us love you. Even if you can’t accept it for your sake, let us love you for ours. Our lives are so much better for it, even when it hurts.”

[beloveddawn-blog]

If You Could See Inside My Heart

Part 1: https://beloveddawn-blog.tumblr.com/post/738056457602416641/beloveddawn-blog-writing-prompt-s-unjustly

Summary: Ri's betrayal was a pivotal moment in Davan's life. Those wounds do not heal untended.

A quick healing spell had fixed him right up, dispersing the ringing in his ears and settling the anger in his bones, and his first clear thought was, I need to apologize to Ri.

Because Ri had done exactly what Davan had asked. He had gotten all the farmers safely to Exile’s Rest, including throwing three children up on his horse and helping a struggling mother with another toddler. He had alerted the guard, ensured Advisor Verity had been warned, and secured medical assistance both for the farmers and to be on standby when the patrol arrived.

Then he had gone back for Davan.

As much as he wanted to insist that Ri should have stayed in the walls, and should have known that Davan wanted him to stay in the walls… He wouldn’t have retreated if Ri was out fighting either.

He wasn’t sure what they were to each other at this point, this being the worst shipwreck of a relationship he had ever been in, but they were definitely too close to abandon each other.

Except Ri wouldn’t promise him that.

Ri had been the first and the worst of his lovers to break Davan’s heart, but he certainly hadn’t been the only one. The first five years of his exile had been hard in a host of ways, and learning that everyone only ever wanted something from you had made it worse. Even if that something was as simple and uncomplicated as casual sex, no one would hesitate to walk away when he had been used up. Ri had reasons for what he’d done, good ones, and he swore up and down that Davan was now, always had been, and forever would be the only one he loved… But his actions didn’t match up with his words, and he utterly refused to promise it would never happen again. It made him impossible to trust, and half the time he was absurdly standoffish like he didn’t even want to be around Davan and it seemed like he was only interested when it was Davan chasing him…

But he never crossed the line into abandoning Davan.

Again.

Like he had previously been forced to do done.

Yet that hadn’t stopped him from pushing Davan out of the way of what would have been a killing blow after he’d fallen to his knees, head ringing like a bell. That hadn’t stopped him from running the bandit attempting to kill Davan straight through, then kicking him off his sword contemptuously. The sharp motions had actually snapped part of Ri’s cheap (all he could afford on his farrier’s pay, and he wouldn’t let Davan spend on him) sword off, and none of that had stopped him from raising Davan’s sword in Davan’s own defense.

All of which, though Davan didn’t know it at the time, had been done while bleeding out from the stab through his kidney that he had taken for Davan’s sake.

And Davan had been furious about it. He’d been seeing double and couldn’t make his legs work and Ri had been incandescently glorious while he’d been protecting Davan like it was normal and not completely the opposite of how it always happened and all he could think was you never stay…

And he’d taken it out on Ri the moment the last bandit had fallen.

Ri had reached for him, gently feeling out his head injury and supporting his wavering body even as Davan had screamed at him. All of his fears of the bandits and his fears for Ri’s life and his fears for his own life and his fears of Ri leaving him again had all jumbled together and poured out of his mouth in a river of vile cruelty he hadn’t even realized he was capable of until that moment. And Ri had just taken it, agreeing and soothing Davan even as his blue eyes clouded and spilled, and his fair complexion became ruddy and tear streaked.

And then he had collapsed.

Daven had screamed in pure terror as Ri’s eyes rolled up and he canted sideways, but Sergeant Liura had caught the man as he tilted. She had lowered him to the ground and quickly checked him over as Davan fought for the muscle control to grab his precious person’s hand. He’d heard her give her report, but hadn’t understood it at the time, transfixed with the grey sheen coming to Ri’s face. He hadn’t responded until she had hoisted Ri over her shoulder and shushed his automatic protest, insisting that it was critical the smaller man be returned to town. She hadn’t even waited for the rest of the squad, had just deputized one of the uninjured ones to make sure Davan was supported and took off at a run.

He had asked his support what had become of his lover, and the uncomfortable looking young man had simply replied, “The sergeant thinks a kidney. He must have gotten it when he pushed you out of the way.”

Davan had blinked slowly, then asked if Ri would live.

“I don’t know, sir.”

He never stays…

And then Davan had burst into tears.

*

All in all, none of that had been a particularly good showing, and Davan felt deeper and deeper shame as he considered the interaction. It was embarrassing that a bandit had gotten enough of a drop on him to stun him, it was flat out dangerous that he had been a liability on the field, and the way he had treated Ri…

Well, perhaps Ri was right to keep him at arm’s length.

He wanted to run to his beloved’s side, but knew it was pointless. Though he had been healed with a powerful magic that would bring him back to fighting fit in a heartbeat, Ri wouldn’t have. He would be sleeping it off in the infirmary, as everyone who was injured in the line of duty did. Healing magic was precious, and not to be squandered. They ran the risk of being unprepared if it turned out the bandits were a feint, after all. Just because he loved Ri didn’t mean he could bend that rule for him.

Not that rule, but perhaps another one?

*

Sergeant Liura fell into step with him the moment he left the keep. She was silent for over half the journey, but he’d known her long enough to read her displeasure and unease in her body language.

He didn’t blame her.

“You must really hate him.” She finally ventured.

He shook his head. “I love him.” He confessed, something he hadn’t said in well over a dozen years.

“It didn’t sound that way to me.” She replied, her voice carefully neutral.

He wrung his hands, feeling like a scolded child. “I know.”

“He was really hurt by what you said to him.” She continued, pressing gently. “You could see it in his face. We all could.”

“I’m on my way to apologize.” He admitted, voice catching from the force of the emotions churning within him.

“He won’t be awake yet.”

“I want to be there when he wakes up,” He muttered. “Plus I know I'll never get any sleep if I don't even go see him.”

She nodded solemnly, and they continued on to the infirmary in a slightly more comfortable silence.

Only once they reached the doors did she speak again, grabbing him by the shoulders and forcing him to look up at her. “Sort this out.” She insisted. “I don’t know what’s between you, but it’s tearing you up and changing you in ways you hate, and I don’t really think it’s Derick’s fault. It’s something in you that’s poisoning you, and it needs to be lanced before it hurts you. And if that lancing involves digging out the source of the infection and discarding it, just let me know.” She smiled at him in a way that was probably meant to be comforting but was instead terrifying. “I’m pretty good at running people out of town myself, and I’ll always take your side.”

He smiled then, her unwavering support even in the face of his uselessness and cruelty making him feel worlds better. “Thank you, but I do not think that will be necessary. That would probably just make it worse.”

She shrugged. “The offer stands if that situation changes.” She assured him, giving him a single shake before turning on her heel and leaving him to it. He sighed, then turned to the door of the infirmary and inched it open, sliding in silently. He didn’t want to wake anyone, after all.

It turns out he didn’t have to worry about that, as the large main room was empty. There had actually been relatively few injuries from the attack, with Ri and Davan himself being easily the worst. Normally there still would have been an acolyte on night duty in the hall, but right now he was missing. A door down the hallway was partially open, spilling light into the hallway.

Davan paused, suddenly unsure of his plan. He had intended to ask the night acolyte to point him to Ri’s room, but they were apparently with another patient. Given the time, there was a decent chance that whoever was there wouldn’t want others to know they were visiting the healers. He didn’t want to disturb them…

But he so desperately wanted to see Ri.

Eventually he decided to head over a knock softly at the door, enough to alert the acolyte to another person, but not enough to disturb anyone sleeping in the other rooms. That plan lasted only until he got close enough to recognize the second voice.

Ri was awake.

He slid into the room, unable to resist getting close enough to see the other man, but still unable to bear the thought of being in the same room as him with this shame on him. He wanted to see Ri…

But he really didn’t want Ri to see him.

It was all for naught, unfortunately, as Ri seemed to sense him the moment he stepped into the room, His head snapped around and his bright blue eyes widened with joy, then narrowed in stubbornness. "I won't ever apologize for saving your life." He snapped. "Not before, and not this time either."

Davan paused mid step, caught entirely off-guard. “I… Don’t expect you to?” He tried, not entirely sure how to handle Ri’s comment or his belligerence, never mind his own shame. He had expected some hostility from the smaller man, but over his own words rather than Ri’s actions. The acolyte slipped silently behind him to leave the room.

“You definitely do.” Ri insisted, twisting his mouth into a petulant frown. “You bring it up all the time, then get mad at me when I won’t.”

He weighed his possible responses for a moment before continuing to pad softly into the room. "I'm not entirely certain what conversations you're referring to," he began, approaching Ri like the other man was a skittish horse, "But I know that's not what I meant to ask for."

"You do." Ri insisted, tears gathering in his eyes. "You call me a stubborn brat, complain about me not apologizing, and completely ignore me. So I give you space because you hate it when I crowd you when you're angry, and then two days later you're back at my door wanting to hold me again." He was shuddering now, clearly trying to hold back sobs, and Davan broke first.

"Oh, sunshine," he whispered, gathering Ri up in his arms. The other man collapsed into him crying. "I'm sorry I make you this sad."

"I'm not." He insisted wetly. His continued sobs did not sell it. "You're here and father isn't and I get to spend all day with horses and everyone is nice. I'm not sad except when you're so mad at me, but you've been mad at me for years! I don't usually cry over it!"

Davan kissed Ri on the top of his head and held him tighter. With a different partner he might even worry about them, but Ri was as tough as an old boot and liked feeling that connected, like Davan could actually pull him in tight enough to make them one flesh. For one moment they hung on a swords edge, frozen in time while Davan tried to figure out what to say. Eventually he decided to simply start and hope the words would come to him.

"I'm so, so sorry, Ri. Absolutely nothing I said out there to you was appropriate, kind, or even true. My head injury had me all muddled and I couldn't separate my fears and my past from your actual actions. That doesn't excuse my reaction, but I hope it helps explain it even just a bit. I know you've never listed my faults for everyone in a bar, slept with my friend, or purposely gave my position to the enemy for a few coins, but in that moment I couldn't keep it all straight. I…”

“Names.” Ri demanded, snapping his head up so suddenly Davan almost bit his tongue off.

“What.” He questioned flatly, bringing one hand up to rub at his chin. That had hurt.

“Give me their names. All of them. I’m going to make them regret they were ever born.” There was determination in every line of Ri’s body, and his eyes were as hard as flint even with the tears still flowing from them. “They had the opportunity to know you and they threw it away and they hurt you and…”

“No.” He replied, just as resolute as his lover. “No, I’m not giving you their names why in the names of all the gods would I do that? It was years ago and far away and several of them are dead anyway and it’s the middle of the bedamned night and you just received a healing, do you really think I’m going to let you go anywhere right now?”

They stared at each other for a moment and Davan truly thought they were about to have an actual fight over this complete nonsense… And then Ri gave way with a very ill-humoured sulk. “They deserve it.” He insisted, but Davan was having none of it.

“People get hurt in life, it’s part of the whole thing. That doesn’t mean you can cut a bloody swath through the countryside, Ri, that’s insane. Besides, I’d miss you if you went away.” He hadn’t meant to say that last bit, didn’t like how vulnerable it made him, was a bit too honest, but it worked in a way nothing else had. All of the tension flowed out of the slighter man’s body and Davan suddenly found himself supporting the equivalent of a dead eel.

Ri smiled up at him, almost purring. It was the happiest Davan had seen him since they were children. “Really, Azimuth? You’d miss me? Even with all the other people you know?”

“Of course I would.” He muttered back, face aflame. But, well, might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb. “I always miss you when you’re gone. Even when I was newly banished and so angry, I missed you as much as I hated you.” He winced then, remembering Ri’s words from earlier. “I don’t like it when you’re gone from my side, even when I’m the one driving you off. Every time I worry that it might be the last time, that this time you might just keep walking. It… dishumours me.” That was an understatement, and from the twitchy little smirk Ri was making, he knew it. “Why are you so surprised? You miss me as well.”

‘Every moment of every day.” He replied, caring not one bit how it sounded, the self-satisfied jerk. “If I’m not with you, I miss you. I crave you. I wish I could spend every moment next to you, from now until the end of time. I don’t even want you to leave to use the privy because I know I’ll miss you while you’re gone. You’re the center of my world. You’re my sun and stars and the rain in my field and the wind in my sails. This isn’t news. I’ve told you how I feel before.”

“Not like this.” Davan all but wailed, bright red and with his pulse thundering so loud he almost couldn’t hear. He’d never been more embarrassed in his life… but he’d also never been happier. Nobody had ever adored him the way Ri did, and the honest love in his voice was more than Davan knew how to handle.

“You’re so cute.” Ri crowed, absolutely delighted. "I haven't been able to make you blush since Before! This is amazing!"

"It is not," Davan snapped, annoyed with both himself and his beloved. "I'm the Lord Protector of Exile's Rest, I'm an accomplished warrior and a seasoned politician, and it's been years since I was a wide-eyed youth who could be swayed by a sweet word. I am not cute!"

Ri gave him such a fond smile Davan almost melted right to the floor. "You couldn’t be swayed by a volcano, let alone mere words. You'd just plant yourself in front of whatever you were defending and make the world bend around you. It's part of what makes you cute."

Davan blinked at him for a moment, totally caught off guard. Usually his hard-headed stubbornness was the insurmountable obstacle that led to betrayal. To hear Ri, who had seen it in action more often than any other person in Davan's life, talk about it with fondness and affection was… Unexpected.

“You say that like it’s a virtue.”

"It is." Ri replied, simple and clear. "It's one of your greatest virtues."

A small, wry smile curled the corner of Davan's lips. "Most would disagree."

"Most can't bear the reflection of their own sins that comes from standing next to one so pure and indomitable as you. It makes them feel inadequate.” It was said like it was an irrefutable truth, but it was one Davan wasn’t willing to face. He chose instead to deflect.

“But not you?” He teased, gentle and fond.

“I hold no illusions as to who I am or what I’ve done.” Ri replied, proud in a way that only came with total conviction in his choices. “I don’t need to fear the reflection because I know what it will show. Why would I fear the shadow, and the shapes it holds, when I know it comes from your light? Hiding the objectionable parts of myself would never be worth it if it meant hiding from you. I will stand in that light as often as I can possibly manage, no matter what it shows or how it burns.”

“But not forever.” Davan replied, his elation crashing down as he suddenly remembered why Ri distempers him so. “You say this, believe this, but won’t ever promise me that. That you won’t leave again. That you won’t push me away again like you did when we were young. Like I won’t still be alone at the end of it all, as all my hopes and dreams burn to ash and slip from my fingers. As I’m left standing in the wreckage of the life I thought I’d get to have, searching desperately for something, anything, to begin rebuilding with.”

Ri’s face clouded over, joy dropping off to something almost pensive. He pulled back just slightly, just enough to take one of Davan’s hands in his and bring it up to face level. There he cradled it as if it was the finest glasswork, running his fingers over the scars and calluses he could find as if they were just as precious as the unblemished skin.

“Azimuth, love, I would walk through the fires of hell for you. I would follow you to the ends of the earth and beyond. There is nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe. So no, I cannot promise you I will never leave or push you away again. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I would make a thousand more deals with a thousand more devils and never count the cost if it would protect you. That includes, if necessary, leaving first. I cannot even begin to imagine the circumstances that would convince me to do so, and that choice would tear my own heart to shreds as much as yours, but long ago I did promise you forever. It was a promise I meant with my whole heart, and it was a promise I broke. I need you to know I mean the promises I make to you, like the promise to love you until the end of time and beyond, and that means I will not make you promises I cannot keep.” He kissed Davan’s knuckles then, an act of devotion, then turned his hand over to kiss his palm, an act of love. “Not to you. Not ever to you. Not again.”

It was what he didn’t know he needed to hear. It was like a balm soothing his fractured heart and warming his chilled soul. It was so much more than he had been looking for, and maybe… Maybe he could believe it, that he could have and keep the greatest love he had ever known. That they could nurture it together as it blossomed into something wonderful. Something that would tie them together even if they were separated, and bring them back to each other in the fullness of time.

He didn’t even know he was crying until Ri gently set his hand down to instead cup his face and wipe his tears away. After that there was no holding back, and silent weeping quickly became wrenching sobs as his soul finally cleansed one of it’s oldest wounds. Ri cooed at him and guided him down to join him on the too-small infirmary bed, and Davan had no fight left in him to resist with. Instead he just allowed Ri to tuck him down under the smaller man’s chin and wrap him up, as if Davan was someone small and delicate who needed and deserved to be treated with gentleness and soothed. As if he was the one who had been hurt and was healing. As if it was simple to just… Coddle him in this way…

Davan fell asleep like that, tucked safely into Ri’s arms and feeling protected and cherished for the first time ever. It was the best sleep he ever had.

[beloveddawn-blog]

Davan has an incredibly complex entirely internal relationship with his parents. He was the menopause baby of a pair of farmers and his parents loved him... but they didn't say anything when he was accused of a crime and exiled. As an adult he can sort of see why they felt they had to make the choice to stay quiet, but he's still incredibly hurt by it when he thinks about it. He tries not to think about it.

Ri's mother died in childbirth.

Caedecus remembers and loves his mother, but it's been years since she was murdered by the church he's technically a part of. He's not really aware of it, but part of the reason he doesn't go by his birth name is he doesn't want to... cheapen the name by having anyone but his parents call him by it. Cheapen isn't entirely correct, but it's the closest he (or I) can get to describing the feeling.

Idala's mother may or may not be dead. Idala has no idea if she survived the destruction of her grandmother's keep, and she doesn't really care. Her parents were monsters, humanoid shells left after the family cult finished molding them into exactly what they were supposed to be. As long as she stays Over There and never attempts to come near Idala or anyone she cares about Idala has no interest in her. If, however, she is alive and comes anywhere near Exile's Rest Idala will be perfectly happy to ensure she dies this time. Assuming Davan or Liura don't get to her first.

Will was the spare to his brother's heir, and has a very vague sense of who his mother is on a personal level. He tends to entirely forget his family exists, considering their kingdom is most of a continent away. He absolutely would celebrate Mother's Day if it existed in his world, however, as he would conspire with his children to spoil his wife rotten. He's intense, and she's the absolute center of his world.

Liura's parents were killed due to mother's heritage. She misses them fiercly every day, and really tries not to resent her mother for being half elven. She knows it wasn't her mother's choice, and that if she could her mother would have disavowed her elven father herself, but grief isn't logical. Her Grandfather (paternal) tells her stories not just of his son, but of the young lady he became smitten with and brought home. He does his best to help her feel a connection to them, but it's hard some days. She saves his letters for days she can handle them.

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[cartouchespourletempspresent]

“Aujourd’hui, la lib­erté sex­uelle de la majorité est en réal­ité une con­ven­tion, une oblig­a­tion, un devoir social, une anx­iété sociale, une car­ac­téris­tique inévitable de la qual­ité de vie du con­som­ma­teur. Bref, la fausse libéra­tion du bien-être a créé une sit­u­a­tion tout aussi folle et peut-être davan­tage que celle du temps de la pauvreté. En effet, pre­mière­ment: le résul­tat d’une lib­erté sex­uelle “offerte” par le pou­voir est une véri­ta­ble névrose général­isée. La facil­ité a crée l’obsession; parce que c’est une facil­ité “induite” et imposée, découlant du fait que la tolérance du pou­voir ne con­cerne que l’exigence sex­uelle exprimée par le con­formisme de la majorité. Elle ne pro­tège que le cou­ple: et le cou­ple a fini par devenir une con­di­tion de parox­ysme, au lieu d’être un signe de lib­erté et de bonheur. […] Autre­fois le cou­ple était béni, aujourd’hui il est mau­dit. Les con­ven­tions et les jour­nal­istes imbé­ciles con­tin­u­ent de s’attendrir sur “le bon petit cou­ple” (comme ils dis­ent abom­inable­ment) sans s’apercevoir qu’il s’agit là d’un pacte crim­inel. Et les mariages: autre­fois, c’étaient des fêtes, et leur car­ac­tère d’institution – si stu­pide et sin­istre – était moins fort du fait qu’il était insti­tué par, pré­cisé­ment, un proces­sus heureux et joyeux. Aujourd’hui, au con­traire, les mariages ressem­blent à de hâtifs rites funèbres. La cause de toutes les choses ter­ri­bles que je suis en train de dire est claire: autre­fois “l’espèce” devait lut­ter pour sur­vivre et, par con­séquent le nom­bre des nais­sances devait dépasser celui des décès. Aujourd’hui, par con­tre, “l’espèce”, si elle veut sur­vivre, doit s’arranger pour que le nom­bre des nais­sances ne dépasse pas celui des décès. Et donc: chaque enfant qui nais­sait autre­fois, représen­tant une garantie de vie, était béni, tan­dis que chaque enfant qui naît aujourd’hui, con­tribuant à l’autodestruction de l’humanité, est mau­dit.”

 Pier Paolo Pasolini, Ecrits corsaires

[zoutilevanjil]

BONDYE DEJA KOMANSE TRASE YON NOUVO PLAN POU AVNI W, OU MÈT KONTINYE PRIYE. Si nou te konnen ki projè Bondye gen pou nou se chak moman nou ta dil mèsi davans. Bondye pa menm jan ak lòm, se lòm ki toujou ap panse negatifman pou moun, men Bondye gen Yon plan pozitif pou chak moun. *( #Jeremie 29:11 >> SE MWEN MENM KI KONNEN SA'M GEN NAN TÈT MWEN POU NOU,* e li kontinye poul di *"SE MWEN MENM SENYÈ A KAP PALE"*. la a se pa lòm kap pale, men se Bondye menm ki di sa. Bondye pa gen okenn move lide nan tèt li, se toujou pou byen nou Lap pale , nan menm Jeremie 29:11 lan li di anko *"SE BYEN NOU MWEN TA RENMEN WE, SE PA BAGAY KAP FE NOU MAL, MWEN TA VLE NOU JWENN KICHOY NAP TANN LAN".* Anpil nan nou toujou bezwen pran plezi, rejwi, ri toutan nan malè Yon lot, men li pa bon konsa. Nou tout ta renmen se fanmi, pitit, madanm, mari, papa, manman nou selman ki ta dwe viv byen, poutan Bondye pa panse menm jan ak nou, Bondye gen Yon plan espesyal pou chak moun ki vle swiv Jezikri. Chak moun ki mete konfyans yo nan Bondye gen pou jwenn Yon plas pou toutan. Paske men sa ki ekri nan liv la ( Jean 14:3 >> *LE MA FI'N PARE PLAS LA POU NOU MA TOUNEN V'N CHACHE NOU".* Jan lòm renmen pouvwa, eske reyèlman nou tap jwenn espwa sa nan men yo? Non, se toujou fanmi yo ki tap jwenn li. Men Jezikri pa lòm, li pa gen menm lide ak nou. Se chak moun kap viv jan Bondye vlel la, ki pou viv ak espwa paske rekonpans kap tann nou an okenn moun poko wèl ni jwenn li déjà. Se Bondye menm ki preparel pou nou, se sa ki koz fok nou toujou kontan, fok nou toujou an jwa, fok nou viv ak kè poze chak jou pi plis. *Fè kè nou kontan. Wi, se pou nou kontan nèt, paske Yon gwo rekonpans ap tann nou nan syel la. Matthieu 5:12.* "Eskel pa enpotan pou w fè kè w kontan dépi jodia? Eske w pata vle youn nan moun sa yo ki gen pou rejwi lavi ki pap janm fini an? Ebyen dépi kounye a se pou w remèt Jezikri lavi w épi konsa wa youn nan moun sa yo. Amen! *Medya Levanjil* se rezo paw la. *Evangeliste LINDOR ENOCK* salye w nan non Jezikri ki gen tout pouvwa a! KONTAK +50946879719 https://www.instagram.com/p/CSgwEk2rMUa/?utm_medium=tumblr

[azimuth-only-one-ill-follow]

If You Could See Inside My Heart

A quick healing spell had fixed him right up, dispersing the ringing in his ears and settling the anger in his bones, and his first clear thought was, I need to apologize to Ri.

Because Ri had done exactly what Davan had asked. He had gotten all the farmers safely to Exile’s Rest, including throwing three children up on his horse and helping a struggling mother with another toddler. He had alerted the guard, ensured Advisor Verity had been warned, and secured medical assistance both for the farmers and to be on standby when the patrol arrived.

Then he had gone back for Davan.

As much as he wanted to insist that Ri should have stayed in the walls, and should have known that Davan wanted him to stay in the walls… He wouldn’t have retreated if Ri was out fighting either.

He wasn’t sure what they were to each other at this point, this being the worst shipwreck of a relationship he had ever been in, but they were definitely too close to abandon each other.

Except Ri wouldn’t promise him that.

Ri had been the first and the worst of his lovers to break Davan’s heart, but he certainly hadn’t been the only one. The first five years of his exile had been hard in a host of ways, and learning that everyone only ever wanted something from you had made it worse. Even if that something was as simple and uncomplicated as casual sex, no one would hesitate to walk away when he had been used up. Ri had reasons for what he’d done, good ones, and he swore up and down that Davan was now, always had been, and forever would be the only one he loved… But his actions didn’t match up with his words, and he utterly refused to promise it would never happen again. It made him impossible to trust, and half the time he was absurdly standoffish like he didn’t even want to be around Davan and it seemed like he was only interested when it was Davan chasing him…

But he never crossed the line into abandoning Davan.

Again.

Like he had previously been forced to do done.

Yet that hadn’t stopped him from pushing Davan out of the way of what would have been a killing blow after he’d fallen to his knees, head ringing like a bell. That hadn’t stopped him from running the bandit attempting to kill Davan straight through, then kicking him off his sword contemptuously. The sharp motions had actually snapped part of Ri’s cheap (all he could afford on his farrier’s pay, and he wouldn’t let Davan spend on him) sword off, and none of that had stopped him from raising Davan’s sword in Davan’s own defense.

All of which, though Davan didn’t know it at the time, had been done while bleeding out from the stab through his kidney that he had taken for Davan’s sake.

And Davan had been furious about it. He’d been seeing double and couldn’t make his legs work and Ri had been incandescently glorious while he’d been protecting Davan like it was normal and not completely the opposite of how it always happened and all he could think was you never stay…

And he’d taken it out on Ri the moment the last bandit had fallen.

Ri had reached for him, gently feeling out his head injury and supporting his wavering body even as Davan had screamed at him. All of his fears of the bandits and his fears for Ri’s life and his fears for his own life and his fears of Ri leaving him again had all jumbled together and poured out of his mouth in a river of vile cruelty he hadn’t even realized he was capable of until that moment. And Ri had just taken it, agreeing and soothing Davan even as his blue eyes clouded and spilled, and his fair complexion became ruddy and tear streaked.

And then he had collapsed.

Daven had screamed in pure terror as Ri’s eyes rolled up and he canted sideways, but Sergeant Liura had caught the man as he tilted. She had lowered him to the ground and quickly checked him over as Davan fought for the muscle control to grab his precious person’s hand. He’d heard her give her report, but hadn’t understood it at the time, transfixed with the grey sheen coming to Ri’s face. He hadn’t responded until she had hoisted Ri over her shoulder and shushed his automatic protest, insisting that it was critical the smaller man be returned to town. She hadn’t even waited for the rest of the squad, had just deputized one of the uninjured ones to make sure Davan was supported and took off at a run.

He had asked his support what had become of his lover, and the uncomfortable looking young man had simply replied, “The sergeant thinks a kidney. He must have gotten it when he pushed you out of the way.”

Davan had blinked slowly, then asked if Ri would live.

“I don’t know, sir.”

He never stays…

And then Davan had burst into tears.

*

All in all, none of that had been a particularly good showing, and Davan felt deeper and deeper shame as he considered the interaction. It was embarrassing that a bandit had gotten enough of a drop on him to stun him, it was flat out dangerous that he had been a liability on the field, and the way he had treated Ri…

Well, perhaps Ri was right to keep him at arm’s length.

He wanted to run to his beloved’s side, but knew it was pointless. Though he had been healed with a powerful magic that would bring him back to fighting fit in a heartbeat, Ri wouldn’t have. He would be sleeping it off in the infirmary, as everyone who was injured in the line of duty did. Healing magic was precious, and not to be squandered. They ran the risk of being unprepared if it turned out the bandits were a feint, after all. Just because he loved Ri didn’t mean he could bend that rule for him.

Not that rule, but perhaps another one?

*

Sergeant Liura fell into step with him the moment he left the keep. She was silent for over half the journey, but he’d known her long enough to read her displeasure and unease in her body language.

He didn’t blame her.

“You must really hate him.” She finally ventured.

He shook his head. “I love him.” He confessed, something he hadn’t said in well over a dozen years.

“It didn’t sound that way to me.” She replied, her voice carefully neutral.

He wrung his hands, feeling like a scolded child. “I know.”

“He was really hurt by what you said to him.” She continued, pressing gently. “You could see it in his face. We all could.”

“I’m on my way to apologize.” He admitted, voice catching from the force of the emotions churning within him.

“He won’t be awake yet.”

“I want to be there when he wakes up,” He muttered. “Plus I know I'll never get any sleep if I don't even go see him.”

She nodded solemnly, and they continued on to the infirmary in a slightly more comfortable silence.

Only once they reached the doors did she speak again, grabbing him by the shoulders and forcing him to look up at her. “Sort this out.” She insisted. “I don’t know what’s between you, but it’s tearing you up and changing you in ways you hate, and I don’t really think it’s Derick’s fault. It’s something in you that’s poisoning you, and it needs to be lanced before it hurts you. And if that lancing involves digging out the source of the infection and discarding it, just let me know.” She smiled at him in a way that was probably meant to be comforting but was instead terrifying. “I’m pretty good at running people out of town myself, and I’ll always take your side.”

He smiled then, her unwavering support even in the face of his uselessness and cruelty making him feel worlds better. “Thank you, but I do not think that will be necessary. That would probably just make it worse.”

She shrugged. “The offer stands if that situation changes.” She assured him, giving him a single shake before turning on her heel and leaving him to it. He sighed, then turned to the door of the infirmary and inched it open, sliding in silently. He didn’t want to wake anyone, after all.

It turns out he didn’t have to worry about that, as the large main room was empty. There had actually been relatively few injuries from the attack, with Ri and Davan himself being easily the worst. Normally there still would have been an acolyte on night duty in the hall, but right now he was missing. A door down the hallway was partially open, spilling light into the hallway.

Davan paused, suddenly unsure of his plan. He had intended to ask the night acolyte to point him to Ri’s room, but they were apparently with another patient. Given the time, there was a decent chance that whoever was there wouldn’t want others to know they were visiting the healers. He didn’t want to disturb them…

But he so desperately wanted to see Ri.

Eventually he decided to head over a knock softly at the door, enough to alert the acolyte to another person, but not enough to disturb anyone sleeping in the other rooms. That plan lasted only until he got close enough to recognize the second voice.

Ri was awake.

He slid into the room, unable to resist getting close enough to see the other man, but still unable to bear the thought of being in the same room as him with this shame on him. He wanted to see Ri…

But he really didn’t want Ri to see him.

It was all for naught, unfortunately, as Ri seemed to sense him the moment he stepped into the room, His head snapped around and his bright blue eyes widened with joy, then narrowed in stubbornness. "I won't ever apologize for saving your life." He snapped. "Not before, and not this time either."

Davan paused mid step, caught entirely off-guard. “I… Don’t expect you to?” He tried, not entirely sure how to handle Ri’s comment or his belligerence, never mind his own shame. He had expected some hostility from the smaller man, but over his own words rather than Ri’s actions. The acolyte slipped silently behind him to leave the room.

“You definitely do.” Ri insisted, twisting his mouth into a petulant frown. “You bring it up all the time, then get mad at me when I won’t.”

He weighed his possible responses for a moment before continuing to pad softly into the room. "I'm not entirely certain what conversations you're referring to," he began, approaching Ri like the other man was a skittish horse, "But I know that's not what I meant to ask for."

"You do." Ri insisted, tears gathering in his eyes. "You call me a stubborn brat, complain about me not apologizing, and completely ignore me. So I give you space because you hate it when I crowd you when you're angry, and then two days later you're back at my door wanting to hold me again." He was shuddering now, clearly trying to hold back sobs, and Davan broke first.

"Oh, sunshine," he whispered, gathering Ri up in his arms. The other man collapsed into him crying. "I'm sorry I make you this sad."

"I'm not." He insisted wetly. His continued sobs did not sell it. "You're here and father isn't and I get to spend all day with horses and everyone is nice. I'm not sad except when you're so mad at me, but you've been mad at me for years! I don't usually cry over it!"

Davan kissed Ri on the top of his head and held him tighter. With a different partner he might even worry about them, but Ri was as tough as an old boot and liked feeling that connected, like Davan could actually pull him in tight enough to make them one flesh. For one moment they hung on a swords edge, frozen in time while Davan tried to figure out what to say. Eventually he decided to simply start and hope the words would come to him.

"I'm so, so sorry, Ri. Absolutely nothing I said out there to you was appropriate, kind, or even true. My head injury had me all muddled and I couldn't separate my fears and my past from your actual actions. That doesn't excuse my reaction, but I hope it helps explain it even just a bit. I know you've never listed my faults for everyone in a bar, slept with my friend, or purposely gave my position to the enemy for a few coins, but in that moment I couldn't keep it all straight. I…”

“Names.” Ri demanded, snapping his head up so suddenly Davan almost bit his tongue off.

“What.” He questioned flatly, bringing one hand up to rub at his chin. That had hurt.

“Give me their names. All of them. I’m going to make them regret they were ever born.” There was determination in every line of Ri’s body, and his eyes were as hard as flint even with the tears still flowing from them. “They had the opportunity to know you and they threw it away and they hurt you and…”

“No.” He replied, just as resolute as his lover. “No, I’m not giving you their names why in the names of all the gods would I do that? It was years ago and far away and several of them are dead anyway and it’s the middle of the bedamned night and you just received a healing, do you really think I’m going to let you go anywhere right now?”

They stared at each other for a moment and Davan truly thought they were about to have an actual fight over this complete nonsense… And then Ri gave way with a very ill-humoured sulk. “They deserve it.” He insisted, but Davan was having none of it.

“People get hurt in life, it’s part of the whole thing. That doesn’t mean you can cut a bloody swath through the countryside, Ri, that’s insane. Besides, I’d miss you if you went away.” He hadn’t meant to say that last bit, didn’t like how vulnerable it made him, was a bit too honest, but it worked in a way nothing else had. All of the tension flowed out of the slighter man’s body and Davan suddenly found himself supporting the equivalent of a dead eel.

Ri smiled up at him, almost purring. It was the happiest Davan had seen him since they were children. “Really, Azimuth? You’d miss me? Even with all the other people you know?”

“Of course I would.” He muttered back, face aflame. But, well, might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb. “I always miss you when you’re gone. Even when I was newly banished and so angry, I missed you as much as I hated you.” He winced then, remembering Ri’s words from earlier. “I don’t like it when you’re gone from my side, even when I’m the one driving you off. Every time I worry that it might be the last time, that this time you might just keep walking. It… dishumours me.” That was an understatement, and from the twitchy little smirk Ri was making, he knew it. “Why are you so surprised? You miss me as well.”

‘Every moment of every day.” He replied, caring not one bit how it sounded, the self-satisfied jerk. “If I’m not with you, I miss you. I crave you. I wish I could spend every moment next to you, from now until the end of time. I don’t even want you to leave to use the privy because I know I’ll miss you while you’re gone. You’re the center of my world. You’re my sun and stars and the rain in my field and the wind in my sails. This isn’t news. I’ve told you how I feel before.”

“Not like this.” Davan all but wailed, bright red and with his pulse thundering so loud he almost couldn’t hear. He’d never been more embarrassed in his life… but he’d also never been happier. Nobody had ever adored him the way Ri did, and the honest love in his voice was more than Davan knew how to handle.

“You’re so cute.” Ri crowed, absolutely delighted. "I haven't been able to make you blush since Before! This is amazing!"

"It is not," Davan snapped, annoyed with both himself and his beloved. "I'm the Lord Protector of Exile's Rest, I'm an accomplished warrior and a seasoned politician, and it's been years since I was a wide-eyed youth who could be swayed by a sweet word. I am not cute!"

Ri gave him such a fond smile Davan almost melted right to the floor. "You couldn’t be swayed by a volcano, let alone mere words. You'd just plant yourself in front of whatever you were defending and make the world bend around you. It's part of what makes you cute."

Davan blinked at him for a moment, totally caught off guard. Usually his hard-headed stubbornness was the insurmountable obstacle that led to betrayal. To hear Ri, who had seen it in action more often than any other person in Davan's life, talk about it with fondness and affection was… Unexpected.

“You say that like it’s a virtue.”

"It is." Ri replied, simple and clear. "It's one of your greatest virtues."

A small, wry smile curled the corner of Davan's lips. "Most would disagree."

"Most can't bear the reflection of their own sins that comes from standing next to one so pure and indomitable as you. It makes them feel inadequate.” It was said like it was an irrefutable truth, but it was one Davan wasn’t willing to face. He chose instead to deflect.

“But not you?” He teased, gentle and fond.

“I hold no illusions as to who I am or what I’ve done.” Ri replied, proud in a way that only came with total conviction in his choices. “I don’t need to fear the reflection because I know what it will show. Why would I fear the shadow, and the shapes it holds, when I know it comes from your light? Hiding the objectionable parts of myself would never be worth it if it meant hiding from you. I will stand in that light as often as I can possibly manage, no matter what it shows or how it burns.”

“But not forever.” Davan replied, his elation crashing down as he suddenly remembered why Ri distempers him so. “You say this, believe this, but won’t ever promise me that. That you won’t leave again. That you won’t push me away again like you did when we were young. Like I won’t still be alone at the end of it all, as all my hopes and dreams burn to ash and slip from my fingers. As I’m left standing in the wreckage of the life I thought I’d get to have, searching desperately for something, anything, to begin rebuilding with.”

Ri’s face clouded over, joy dropping off to something almost pensive. He pulled back just slightly, just enough to take one of Davan’s hands in his and bring it up to face level. There he cradled it as if it was the finest glasswork, running his fingers over the scars and calluses he could find as if they were just as precious as the unblemished skin.

“Azimuth, love, I would walk through the fires of hell for you. I would follow you to the ends of the earth and beyond. There is nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe. So no, I cannot promise you I will never leave or push you away again. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I would make a thousand more deals with a thousand more devils and never count the cost if it would protect you. That includes, if necessary, leaving first. I cannot even begin to imagine the circumstances that would convince me to do so, and that choice would tear my own heart to shreds as much as yours, but long ago I did promise you forever. It was a promise I meant with my whole heart, and it was a promise I broke. I need you to know I mean the promises I make to you, like the promise to love you until the end of time and beyond, and that means I will not make you promises I cannot keep.” He kissed Davan’s knuckles then, an act of devotion, then turned his hand over to kiss his palm, an act of love. “Not to you. Not ever to you. Not again.”

It was what he didn’t know he needed to hear. It was like a balm soothing his fractured heart and warming his chilled soul. It was so much more than he had been looking for, and maybe… Maybe he could believe it, that he could have and keep the greatest love he had ever known. That they could nurture it together as it blossomed into something wonderful. Something that would tie them together even if they were separated, and bring them back to each other in the fullness of time.

He didn’t even know he was crying until Ri gently set his hand down to instead cup his face and wipe his tears away. After that there was no holding back, and silent weeping quickly became wrenching sobs as his soul finally cleansed one of it’s oldest wounds. Ri cooed at him and guided him down to join him on the too-small infirmary bed, and Davan had no fight left in him to resist with. Instead he just allowed Ri to tuck him down under the smaller man’s chin and wrap him up, as if Davan was someone small and delicate who needed and deserved to be treated with gentleness and soothed. As if he was the one who had been hurt and was healing. As if it was simple to just… Coddle him in this way…

Davan fell asleep like that, tucked safely into Ri’s arms and feeling protected and cherished for the first time ever. It was the best sleep he ever had.

[beloveddawn-blog]

OC Questionnaire tag!

Thanks for the shout @leahnardo-da-veggie

I'm gonna use Ri

Are you named after anyone?

"My grandfather. And his grandfather. Lineage was important to them. That's why I changed it."

When was the last time you cried?

"The last time I fought with Davan, probably. I think it was just after I got stabbed in the kidney."

Do you have kids?

"This 'lineage' of garbage ends here. I can think of no greater disrespect for my father than that."

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

"Probably. It's the only thing that makes other people bearable."

What's the first thing you notice about people?

"That they're talking to me for some reason? Unless they're trying to kill Davan I would rather not notice them at all."

What's your eye colour?

"Blue."

Scary movies or happy endings?

"Oh, happy. Davan gets all mushy and weepy at a good happy ending. It's cute. Scary stories just upset him. He wants to go fight them. Which is great, he's great, but usually not the response I'm trying to get from him."

Any special talents?

"Knife throwing? Davan's better at it than me now, though. I taught him, but he's just incredible. Picked it up in an afternoon. Can you believe that? An afternoon."

Where were you born?

"That tiny shithole I never want to speak of again. The only good thing that ever came from it was Davan. I hope it rots."

Do you have any pets?

"I got us a dog because I misunderstood something Davan said. He's actually afraid of it. He won't let me get rid of it, though. Says it loves us already."

What kind of sports do you play?

"Equestrian, I guess. I've always been fond of horses. That's why I learned to become a farrier. Horses are much better than people. For one, they don't talk."

How tall are you?

"Shorter than Davan. Did you know that when we were growing up he was so tiny I could tuck him under my chin? He was just a little scrap of a boy, all bony elbows and righteous fire. He's really grown into himself, since he started eating properly." (The question is repeated.) "About six feet."

What was your favourite subject in school?

"I like reading. I taught Davan to read, did you know? We spent many afternoons tucked away together while I tutored him. He was always such an earnest pupil. I had to really work at my lessons to keep ahead of him!"

What is your dream job?

"This? I like being a farrier. I'm also trained as Davan's bodyguard, and I can't think of a better calling. If I couldn't be around Davan, though, maybe a trapper? Someone who lives in the woods and never talks to anyone. That would be perfect."

I'm going to tag @stesierra @squarebracket-trickster and @coffeeangelinabox for this, as well as anyone else who wants to play. It's a good exercise.

OC Questionnaire tag!

thank you @drchenquill for the tag! Gonna use Hans-el, who is going to be extremely pissed off by most of the questions haha

Are you named after anyone?

"You noticed my name is not typical of my people, I see. My father had an infatuation with mortal cultures, and my mother, may her ectoplasm soak the earth, thought the silly little folk-tale about the brother and sister quaint. Shame she did not have a chance to give me a sister. What a sight that would have been, two spirit siblings with human names."

When was the last time you cried?

"Has Hash been going around tattling on me? I am the great Spirit Emperor. I do not cry. Last night was but a... fluke. As were the nights before it."

Do you have kids?

"Do I look like I want a usurper of my throne? Of course I do not. Nor would I ever want one. My bloodline ends with me, as it should. Better to go out with a bang than a whimper."

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

"I am far too sweet and kind a man to do that. Of course I do. What better way is there to get my advisors' braids in a twist? I do try to avoid using it on Hash, though. Now there's a darling who's truly far too sweet and kind for that."

What's the first thing you notice about people?

"Their magic, by and large. The kind of mage they are tells me the kind of person they are. 'Tis the magicless that are the ones I am often wary of. Those tend to conceal hidden depths, and of the shark-infested sorts."

What's your eye colour?

"My people call it iil'kalre, or autumn-leaf gold. Honestly I prefer yellow. There is nothing poetic about eyes, except their taste."

Scary movies or happy endings?

"Believe it or not, I prefer a happy ending. The sort where the hero trying to save her family does, in fact, succeed against all odds. Those sorts of stories inspire hope, and I like hope. It is fun to crush."

Any special talents?

"You know, those who ask uncomfortable questions should be prepared to receive uncomfortable answers. I am Spirit Emperor, the closest thing to a god in this day and age. Let us leave it at that."

Where were you born?

"What sort of question is that? In my home-clan, obviously. If you meant to ask me where my clan lay, it was in the Celitane forest. The Godhuntress destroyed it long ago, and what remains is merely bad memories and death."

Do you have any pets?

"Do human children count? If so, I had one a while back. She is all grown up now, but I still visit her from time to time. She gives me special rates on smuggling artifact in from Luxatia."

What kind of sports do you play?

"I do not play sports, though I practice some forms of martial arts. 'Tis rather unbecoming of a gentleman, but absolutely necessary for an Emperor."

How tall are you?

"How well can you survive a fall off a mountain? Those two may well be the same question, if you continue prodding me. And for the record, foresters are simply less vertically inclined than mountainers. There is nothing peculiar about my height."

What was your favourite subject in school?

"School? Do I look like a woman to you? Egalitarian though we are, even the foresters did not educate males. Today's boys are fortunate beyond belief."

What is your dream job?

"When I was a little boy, I wanted to showcase curios, in one of those museum humans seem so fond of. But I am Spirit Emperor, and the only way one leaves that post is with their ectoplasm returned to the earth."

Tagging @rivenantiqnerd, @pluppsauthor, @beloveddawn-blog, @kaylinalexanderbooks and open tag!

[beloveddawn-blog]

You Questioned Our Determination

Ri thinks the quality of the people he kills should speak for itself. Davan, unsurprisingly, feels that true justice should be blind, and that one's personal opinion should not factor into life or death decisions. This is, of course, politely ignored, as Ri would rather chew his own arm off than allow Davan to come to harm, due process be damned.

Part 1

Part 2

Ri sighed softly and stretched, turning himself over onto his belly and pillowing his head in his arms. Davan chuckled lightly and tucked a blanket around the slighter man in an attempt to keep him warm. Ri huffed and wriggled, working the blanket down to around his hips. He was still quite warm from their very enthusiastic and athletic romp, and for now, the blanket was more suffocating than comforting.

Davan fell silent then, and Ri made a curious noise. It wasn’t like Davan, who was more like his old self in these calm moments. Moments where he didn’t feel the weight of his choices and the prices they took. Moments he could still muster his youthful enthusiasm and exuberance. Moments where they were both too tired and too happy to remember that life had already happened to them, and that the future was no longer infinite.

It wasn’t that Exile’s Rest tied them down, not like their home village had, but it was still a ponderous millstone around Davan’s neck, keeping him firmly anchored in the here-and-now. It was a beloved burden that required careful tending, like a garden too delicate to allow one to travel. Like a sick child, or sheep in wolf country, or a river with beavers. An important and precious blessing that required constant upkeep and commitment.

Cities were not for apathetic dreamers.

Still, these were moments Ri could eke out where Davan would set that burden down. It had near instantly endeared him to Caedecus (so named by the slavers who first discovered his prodigal healing talent and divine favour), who had spent much of the last ten years convinced his liege and dear friend would work himself into an early grave. Caedecus was Ri’s favourite council member for the same reason: no matter how much Davan insisted all of them were his good friends, Caedecus was the only one who seemed to care more about Davan’s physical health than about what he could do for others.

Davan neatly sidetracked that thought by brushing his fingers soothingly over Ri’s back. It was such a nice feeling that it took far longer than it should have to notice Davan was following a pattern. A very clear pattern, now that Ri had noticed it.

Davan’s hand was shaking.

“Azimuth?” Ri questioned, turning slightly so he could see his love. This was likely the sort of conversation he was going to need visual clues to navigate.

Davan ducked down, out of Ri’s line of sight, and pressed a soft kiss to the worst of the raised marks lining his back. He couldn’t help the pleased hum that came from him at that, even though he knew it wasn’t entirely appropriate. 

“What happened?” The rumble of his voice was soft in a way that Ri knew was meant to let him know he didn’t have to answer, but this wasn’t a secret. It had never been a secret.

It had been a counterstrike.

“The amount of malice it takes for six grown men to plot the murder of a boy doesn’t just vanish when the target does.” He replied just as softly, though there was steel underlying his words. He knew this would hurt Davan, but also knew he needed to know anyway. “I was… reminded of why it was a poor choice to defy my father.”

Davan sucked in a sharp breath, then gently placed his forehead against Ri’s back in penitence. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not.” Ri replied, blunt and calm. “When I said I’d never count the cost, I meant this too. I’d have borne far more than just this momentary pain for your safety, Azimuth. My only regrets are what happened to you, not what happened to me.” He flipped himself over, then grabbed Davan’s startled face in his hands. “This was not your doing. All you did was love me, and I will never allow that to be called a mistake.”

Davan brought his own hand up to cup one of Ri’s, then kissed the palm. “I’m still sorry it happened to you. You deserved more than him.”

Ri smirked up at him. “Everyone deserved more than him. He’s a pathetic waste of time and space who made everyone’s life worse for being in it, and I’m delighted that he’s now facing the decline of his physical prowess, the complete annihilation of his power base, the end of his vaunted lineage, and the fact that he knows I did it to him. That your influence alone was enough to turn his bred and raised perfect lackey into the instrument of his destruction. That your kindness was all it took to turn his attack dog back around to him, and that it was his brutality that destroyed his life in the end.”

Davan smiled down at him, hopelessly fond. “You’re so much more than that, Ri. I’ve always known that.”

“I’m more than that because you rescued me from the cage he was keeping me in.” Ri insisted, knowing it was true. “All of the good in me is simply a reflection of you. Without you, I would be nothing but a weapon.”

Davan shook his head fondly, then grew pensive. “I think you are kinder and more merciful than you believe, but I admit it concerns me that your father and his cronies might make more trouble now that you are not there to oppose them. I know you trust Edith to corral them, but six against one is unfair for anyone.”

Ri blinked at him. “What do you mean, six on one? All I left Edith to contend with was one broken old man, his legacy in ruins and his silver tongue tarnished from the exposure of his evil lies. She is more than a match for him, and even if she wasn’t I have burned too many of his bridges for him to rebuild.”

Now it was Davan’s turn to blink in surprise. “What happened to the rest of them?”

Ri shrugged. “I killed them.”

*

Sargent Liura strode into the hall, flanked by High Priest Caedecus and Archmage Idala. “This nonsense ends now.” She hissed out, causing Davan’s shoulders to set stubbornly and Derick to turn his big, blue puppy dog eyes her way. This time she had brought reinforcements, as Idala would back Davan even if he were wrong, and Caedecus was Derick’s most vocal supporter in the city. If these two idiots couldn’t get over themselves enough to have a reasonable discussion about this, then Liura would let Idala and Caedecus argue it in proxy. The last time they had let something fester as badly as this was, it had only ended when Derick had nearly died in battle.

No one was dying today, however. Not unless she killed them out of pure frustration.

She gestured around her, and her two chosen seconds moved to flank the men they were there to defend. Derick eyed the High Priest in wary confusion, while Davan smiled easily at one of his closest friends. Liura drew herself up to her full height, demanding all the attention in the room once again. “We are here,” She intoned solemnly, “To sort out the issue that is currently destabilizing the city. The Lord Protector has been distracted and prickly, and his temperament is mirrored by the city as a whole. It needs resolving.”

Derick nodded, his mouth firming with agreement and understanding. It was Davan, of course, who protested. “Liura, really, I am perfectly capable of managing my emotions and my affairs on my own. You don’t need to keep inserting yourself into them.”

It was Caedecus, surprisingly, who spoke up. He was the most mild mannered and easy going of the council, due to his time as a slave making him terrified of even his own authority. “Davan, please. You don’t eat, or sleep, or even train like you usually do. Headaches aren’t unusual for you, but you’ve had one three out of every four days for a fortnight now. The whole city is on edge as ripples of your ill temper and haggard appearance spread to all corners. It’s so clear to us all that you hate arguing with Derick. Please, won’t you let us help?”

Two pairs of beseeching eyes met his, and Davan’s displeasure collapsed like a snow fort in the spring. “Oh, all right. Let’s get this over with.”

Liura turned towards Derick, deciding easily to start with the compliant one. Davan was much more likely to explain his side if he felt like he was rebutting Derick’s explanation than if he was just asked his defence first. She nodded. He shrugged.

“Davan doesn’t like that I murdered five people in cold blood with no trial. No effort was ever made to bring them to justice in a more reasonable manner, and I’m not sorry I did it.” He asserted, blue eyes blazing. 

She nodded once, then turned to Davan.

“Ri has admitted to choosing violence as his foremost problem solving technique without a concern for due process, fairness, or consequences. That makes him a dangerous liability, especially when he will not accept that this circumvents all the tenets this city is built on, or promise not to do it again and to allow the law to work as it should.” He rebutted decisively, proving once again that when these two argued this badly it was usually because they were arguing about different things at the same time.

She turned back to Derick, who was now looking just as stubborn as Davan. “Why did you never attempt to solve this through the usual means?”

“They were the source of the corruption in our hometown, and between them held the majority of the power in the town. Besides, I didn’t need a trial to know they were guilty. I heard them plotting to lynch Davan with my own ears. It’s why I falsely accused him of impropriety in the first place.” His voice rang clear, and it was obvious he was proud of his actions, not just accepting of them.

“Ri, that’s exactly the problem.” Davan burst in, frustrated and deeply bothered. “My point is that death should never be the default solution, and that you treat it far too casually.” He reached out to his lover, clearly imploring. “I’ve killed people myself. I know. Every death damages your soul in some way. Sometimes…” He hesitated then, and a dark cloud passed over his own expression. “Sometimes in a way that never heals.”

Derick was up in a heartbeat, crossing the room only to gather the renowned Lord Protector of Exile’s Rest up against his chest like he was comforting a child. It was truly something to see. “I don’t know who you killed that left this mark on your mind, Azimuth, but I am sure they deserved it. I trust your judgement. And as for my own killings… Dear One, I have killed exactly nine people. Most of them I can name, and all of them actively intended to kill you. I do not regret their deaths in the slightest, as killing them made things safer for you. I will not promise to stay my hand if you are in danger, but that has so far been the only thing I have killed for.”

Davan was silent at that, but Liura wanted to dig a little deeper into this. Otherwise it would continue to weigh on her friend’s mind.

“When did you decide to kill the first one? And how did you do it?” She asked, leaning slightly forward in her curiosity. 

Derick shrugged. “I didn’t really decide, I just did.” He replied. “I was so very furious with them all for plotting against Davan, and my back was still wrecked, so I snuck out to go down to our hidden spot by the river. Jeremiah followed me, kept trying to feed me the mead he brought, and eventually tried to grope me. I was so disgusted with him I just kicked out his bad knee, grabbed the back of his head, and drowned him. Everyone assumed he got drunk and fell in, even my father. That was when I realized I could get rid of them all in supposed accidents, and the only one that might catch on would be my father. By then, though, I’d already have turned the public opinion tide. It became my purpose in life, as retribution for ever seeking to harm Davan.” He looked down and pulled Davan’s dark head further in, curling about the bigger man in an obviously protective gesture. “I didn’t think he’d ever find out about it, though. I didn’t think I’d ever see him again.”

“Ri, I…” Davan began, but Liura had heard enough. While Derick might place Davan’s wellbeing too highly, Davan himself most definitely placed it too lowly.

“What if we remove Davan from the question?” She interrupted. Both men turned to look at her.

“It’s a matter of principle, Liura, changing the details doesn’t fix that.” 

“Why on earth would we do that?” 

They spoke over each other, united in their opinion that the suggestion was a stupid idea.

Liura, however, didn’t care what they thought of her idea. She was going with it anyway. “We remove Davan from the equation. What we’re left with is a traumatized and brutalized adolescent who had saved another youth at great personal cost who was still actively being harmed by the grown adult aggressors. During an attempted rape related to the first attack he defended himself, resulting in the death of the attacker. He then realized that he had the power to prevent them from hurting others, and he used it. Are you really going to stay mad at that child for seeking revenge, Davan? Or at the adult he became for not regretting those deaths? And Derick made a good point as well: His hands are much cleaner than either of ours.”

Davan’s brow creased in contemplation that rapidly shaded to unhappiness as he considered the situation from that point of view. She could almost see the moment he realized he agreed with her.

Derick, on the other hand, immediately and predictably lept to Davan’s defence.. “Don’t you say that about Davan!” He insisted. “His soul is the sort of incandescent that no mortal sin could tarnish. It is definitely brighter than mine.”

“Ri.” Davan whined, burying his face in one hand while the other snuck around to hold his lover close. Liura was sure his ears would be red if she could only see them. “That’s… Entirely incorrect. You have no idea what I’ve done in the years since we were youths. Liura knows that part of me better than you. I’ve killed… many, many more than your nine.”

“You’ve done what you needed to.” Derick insisted, his whole focus back on Davan. “Only what you needed to, with the needs of those around you and the best interests of all involved kept at the forefront of your mind. I know you did, because you could never have done otherwise. Even as a mercenary I know you were never needlessly cruel or gleeful about your skill. You were backed into a corner and did all you could to survive, and to keep those around you alive as well. I need no proof of it, but if you do consider this: Why did you leave the field as soon as you were able? Why found this city? Why fight so hard to give everyone as lost and hurt as you a safe place to heal and grow? When I say mortal sins cannot dull the brilliance of your soul I mean it. This includes the deaths you have dealt.”

“How about we let the Gods worry about their own scales?” Caedecus broke in, beaming at the both of them. “Their ways are not for mortal comprehension, and I feel both of you have no need to worry about that reckoning.” He reached out to lay a gentle hand on Idala’s shoulder, heedless of the sparks the Archmage was throwing out. “Instead, why don’t we head out to the practice field so Idala can let off some of her anger? I would rather not treat anyone for burns if I don’t have to, and now that she’s heard some details about who was targeting Davan when he was young and helpless she’s liable to burn the keep down.”

“An excellent idea.” Liura replied, striding towards the door. “Not you two, though!” She threw back as Davan made a move to stand up. “You stay here and have a moment. I think, after the last few weeks, you need it.”

*

“Azimuth?” Ri eventually questioned, running his hand through Davan’s hair. Even the echoes of the others had faded long before, but the taller man had made no move to react in any way. “Are you well?”

“I… Don’t like that Idala is upset. She doesn’t need to be. I’m fine.” He replied. Ri sighed, knowing this was going to be an ongoing discussion.

“She’s upset for you because she loves you. Like I do, like Caedecus does, like Liura does, like your whole city does. You’re easy to love, and so, so worth it. Even when it makes us sad or angry.” Ri explained, even though he knew Davan wasn’t ready to accept that truth.

“I don’t want anyone to get hurt because of me.” He insisted, and Ri couldn’t help but drop a sweet kiss on his head.

“I know you don’t, Azimuth, but we will. We gladly will. You deserve to be part of a better world than anything on this mortal plane can offer. We all know that. And we all love you for trying to make the world become that better version. Even if it fails, that vision is worth fighting for. You are worth fighting for. You remind us even on the bad days that things can be better, and you leave them that way in your wake just by touching the lives that you do and changing them for the better. I know you don’t see it as enough, but it’s so much more than anyone else can do.” He kissed him again, then tightened his grip. “Just… let us love you. Even if you can’t accept it for your sake, let us love you for ours. Our lives are so much better for it, even when it hurts.”

[scenaristefadou]

" EXCESS LOVE "

EKRI PA : FADELÈNE AUGUSTIN

TÈKS : JUILLET 2021

EMAIL : scenaristefadoudou@gmail.com

EPIZÒD : 5

🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀

Florence friz tèlman l sezi .

SCÈNE 1 : FLORENCE/VWAZIN NAN

FLORENCE(bege) : Men ... Men...

VWAZIN NAN : M pa nan men ... Men ... avè w la mwen menm se lajan m ap tann.

FLORENCE(ap eseye gade san fwa l) : Fò w konnen fason w jis parèt la pa bon vwazin , imajine nou te la byen pwòp . Nou te konn pataje sa nou genyen ansanm san patipri , ou jis al andeyò vini w vini , ou chanje konplètman . Sa k fè w pa fon ti chita pou n pale byen trankil ?

VWAZIN NAN : Ou pa wont ou di w te konn pataje sa w genyen avè m ? Kisa w te konn pataje ak mwen konsa ? E kwè se mwen ki te konn ap tiye vè nan vant ou ? M pa gen okenn chita pale m pral fè ak moun la , kale m lajan m !

FLORENCE : M po ko gen kòb la non e w konnen m pa p travay , pran yon ti pasyans .

VWAZIN NAN : W ap vin di m pran pasyans pou w pa peye m , si w panse w pa p remèt mwen mezi kòb mwen yo w chire .

FLORENCE : Humm ok , m ap remèt ou yo . M fèk sot lopital ak bebe a , m pral mete l kouche .

VWAZIN NAN : M ba w jounen an pou w remèt mwen kòb mwen sinon se mwen , se ou tou .

FLORENCE : Ou pa bezwen rive jis la , m di w m ap remèt ou kòb la .

VWAZIN NAN : Ebyen ok .

Li vire ale , Florence antre ak bebe a . Li jwenn Marie-Magdala ap fè manje , timoun yo sou lakou a ap jwe .

SCÈNE 2 : FLORENCE/MARIE-MAGDALA

FLORENCE(avanse pi pre l) : M vini wi Mama .

MARIE-MAGDALA : Wa fin fè manje a , m te kòmanse pou ou .

FLORENCE : A ! Pwoblèm ki nan kò m la pitit , m pa santi m te ka fè anyen la non .

MARIE-MAGDALA(byen vag) : An w konn gen pwoblèm tou ? Tèt chaje !

FLORENCE : W ap pase m nan betiz ? M nik parèt devan baryè a , m kwaze ak vwazin nan . Fi a mande pou m remèt li mezi kòb li te konn bay pou n fè manje pou timoun yo , li menm sèmante jounen an p ap pase pou m pa remèt li kòb yo non .

MARIE-MAGDALA : W ap jwenn sa ! M kwè se ou k te konn kole nan kòlèt lougawou a ?

FLORENCE : Pa di sa Mama , nou leve ak fi a depi nou tou piti . M pa t janm panse l te yon move moun , nou pa t konn mande l dayè .

MARIE-MAGDALA : Ebyen degaje w !

FLORENCE : M poko menm konn kote m pral jwenn kòb la non sè m .

MARIE-MAGDALA(ap moke l de li) : Epa w gen Pedro ? Wa fè Pedro peye l pou ou .

FLORENCE : Mwen ? Sa k di m Pedro pa p al fè m menm bagay la tou ? Engratitid la se nan ayisyen l ye menm wi .

MARIE-MAGDALA : Depi w di m !

Florence antre pou l al repoze , Marie-Magdala kontinye fè manje a . Prèske chak sekond fi a vin frape baryè a pou l mande kòb li , Marie-Magdala wè sa twòp atò li pare yon bonm dlo pou li .

Florence chita nan yon kwen l ap kriye menm manje l pa manje . Barbie zuzu a prèske fè tout tan l kay Philippe , li ka al lòt bò a kounya la nan 30 minit li retounen .

SCÈNE 3 : BARBIE ZUZU A/PHILIPPE

PHILIPPE(santi l agase) : Ou pwomennen isi a twòp wi tifi .

BARBIE ZUZU A : Bon m pa p fè anyen lakay la , se la pou m pase jounen m koz m toujou jwenn bon ti vibe isi a .

PHILIPPE : Ebyen mwen m bouke wè w isi a , m rayi lè moun pwomennen devan pòt mwen twòp . Ou anpeche m wè lòt moun .

BARBIE ZUZU A : Non m pa anpeche w okontrè se akonpanye m akonpanye w , ou ta dwe kontan .

PHILIPPE : Kontan pou yon pye poudre ki pa janm gen anyen pou l fè lakay li ? M konn ki plan w ap maniganse wi .

BARBIE ZUZU A : M pa p maniganse okenn plan , m jis renmen lè m bò kote w .

PHILIPPE : Mwen m pa renmen l .

BARBIE ZUZU A(pran pòz li tris) : M sonje w te di m ou renmen bèl kò m nan , bèl dach mwen an epi kounya w ap pouse do m Philippe ?

PHILIPPE : M pa pouse do w chère , m jis vle mete yon limit .

BARBIE ZUZU A : M pa p fè anyen ki pou deranje w , si se sa w vle oke men toujou raple w ke m renmen w Philippe .

Li fè kòmsi l prale .

PHILIPPE(rele l) : Ou mèt vini cheri , mwen menm tou m renmen w .

BARBIE ZUZU A(kouri al anbrase l) : Mwen renmen w plis Philippe .

PHILIPPE : Men m pa swete twòp jalouzi vin fè w anpeche m jwi lavi m non , m te gentan di w m poko fin tchip . Nenpòt kilè w ka vin jwenn mwen ak yon lòt fi .

BARBIE ZUZU A : M konnen byen Philippe , m pa p gen pwoblèm si w mete m okouran men depi w pa banm lanmou m merite a m ap gen pwoblèm avè w .

PHILIPPE : Kòmansa ? Bon m mete w klè sou sa deja ?

BARBIE ZUZU A : M konprann men m di w depi w toujou fè m santi ke m se madanm ou , banm ti afeksyon m merite , mennen m soti eksetera , m pa p gen pwoblèm .

PHILIPPE : W ap jwenn tout sa yo men se pa tout tan .

BARBIE ZUZU A(bo l sou bouch) : Mèsi davans boo .

PHILIPPE(byen vag) : Se devwa m .

BARBIE ZUZU A(souri) : Devwa nou de a .

Yo kontinye pale , fè ti womans yo . Pedro pase wè medam yo , li jwenn timoun yo sou lakou a ap jwe .

SCÈNE 4 : PEDRO/TIMOUN YO

SA K PI PITI A(kouri vin kontre l) : Patnè !

PEDRO(souri) : Sa k ap fèt piti ?

SA K PI PITI A : Nou la , n ap vanse .

PEDRO : Kot Flo ?

SA K PI PITI A : Li anndan an ap kriye , Mama ap ri l .

PEDRO(etone) : Kòmansa ? Sa l genyen ?

SA K PI PITI A(bese vwa l) : Vwazin nan fache avè l , li di Flo pou l remèt li tout sa l te konn ba li yo .

PEDRO : Kòmansa ? Se pa kado li te fè kado yo ?

SA K PI PITI A : M pa konnen , se talè a l te vin joure la .

PEDRO : Tann mwen la , m pral fon ti pale ak medam yo . (Li lonje yon sachè ba li) men sa m te pote pou nou .

SA K PI PITI A(kontan) : Mèsiiiiii !

PEDRO : Se devwa m freo .

Li antre al kot medam yo , li jwenn Flo chita sou yon chèz ak yon men nan machwè l . Flo nik wè l , li kouri siye zye l .

SCÈNE 5 : PEDRO/MARIE-MAGDALA/FLORENCE

MARIE-MAGDALA : Oh Ped ! Kòman w ye ?

PEDRO : Mwen byen wi e nou ? M vin la m tande Flo ap kriye , sa k pase menm ?

MARIE-MAGDALA(rale l pou l chita bò kote l) : Ou vin la nan bon moman , timamoun m tande ki fin anraje sou Flo pou l al remèt li mezi kòb li te konn fè l kado . M pa konn si se jalouzi l ap fè , li prèske fè tout jounen an ap mache dèyè kòb la .

PEDRO : Kòman pou l remèt li a ? Epa kado l te konn fè l kado yo ?

MARIE-MAGDALA : Mande m toujou ! Olye l benyen fi a ak yon bonm dlo , li ret chita ap fè simagri la .

Flo twaze l .

PEDRO : Non , non m pa p dakò benyen l a dlo a , di m konbyen w dwe l pou m peye l .

MARIE-MAGDALA : Mwen pa konnen , Flo la mande Flo paske se li k te konn pran bagay nan men timamoun .

PEDRO : Timamoun li rele menm ?

MARIE-MAGDALA : Non , se mwen ki ba l non an .

PEDRO : Anh ok ! (Gade Flo) Ann pale non , konbyen kòb ou dwe l pou m ka tou pase peye l ?

FLORENCE(vire tèt li lot bò ak mepri) : Non mèsi , m pa bezwen moun peye dèt mwen pou mwen . Talè wa al fè m menm bagay la tou .

PEDRO : Ou pa ka ap mete tout moun nan menm panye , sa ka rive se jalou fi a ap fè paske majoritèman moun nan konn ap ede w jis pou l ka fè moun wè . Se sa k fè yo toujou vle pou w depann de yo sèlman konsa tou , li te ka konn ede w pa enterè men lè l wè l pa jwenn anyen an retou li vin rayi w .

FLORENCE : Pawòl ou yo pa ase konvenkan Pedro , engratitid la se nan lòm li ye menm . M poko jwenn yon moun ki swadizan vle ede m pou l pa fè m menm bagay la an retou . Te gen yon epòk m te konn prete rad nan men moun , se konsa yo te fè m tou paske alafen se menm yo menm nan ki t al mache di tout moun sou katye a ke se gras a yo m konn abiye e yo te gen rezon .

PEDRO(ap eseye konvenk li) : Yo pa t gen rezon Flo , pa di yo te genyen l . M panse si moun nan te aksepte prete w rad li , se paske nou te gen yon lyen men di m li al mache di tout moun sou katye a sa pa fè sans .

FLORENCE(kriye) : M pa konn si se paske se te desten m ou di mwens se modi Bondye modi m , manman m mouri kite m avèk twa timoun nan men m san papa . M pase tout vi m ap soufri pou yo , pafwa m konn menm tounen mandyan pou yo pandan m pa t menm mande pou yo fèt . Èske se sa m merite ?

PEDRO : Bondye pa janm bay pèn san sekou Flo , mwen m vle ede w . M pa vle anyen an retou , m vle fè l ak pwòp volonte m . Jis di m konbyen kòb ou dwe dam nan pou m peye l .

FLORENCE : Jan m fè konnen konbyen m dwe l , se pa li k te konn bay yo ?

PEDRO : Hummm ok ! Demen m ap vin la pou m ka pale avè l pou ou , si l retounen vin chèche kòb la di l pou l tann demen w ap ba li l .

MARIE-MAGDALA(kouri reponn) : Lougawou sa pa p antre la vre , depi l vin la m ap chode l byen chode .

FLORENCE(gade l byen dwòl) : Kòman w fè gen kè pou w trete yon moun lougawou konsa ?

MARIE-MAGDALA : Paske se sa l ye vre ! M pa janm nan benyen kache lonbrit non mwen , ou fè kòmsi w pa t konn si fi a se lougawou .

PEDRO(gade l) : Kite sa kòkòt , n ap jis peye kòb la pou tout bagay antre nan plas .

FLORENCE : Depi w di m .

Pedro fè yon bon ti tan ap pale avè yo aprèsa li ale , vwazin nan te kanpe deyò a lè Pedro t ap soti a . Nan demen byen bonè , Pedro vin ak kòb la pou l bay . Li fè yon bon ti tan ap frape , pyès moun pa vin ouvè . Lè l wè sa , li antre . Rive anndan an , li jwenn de medam yo kouche atè a tou rèd . Lè l ale pou l mande timoun yo sa k genyen , tou de bèbè . Li kouri al gade kote l wè Daliana , li chèche nan tout kwen kay la l pa wè l . Pedro tèlman sezi , li pèdi konesans .

[beloveddawn-blog]

~Davan~

Description: Headstrong by Trapt

Back off, I'll take you on Headstrong to take on anyone I know that you are wrong Headstrong, we're headstrong

Like: Little Moments by Brad Paisley (he's an utter sap, but would be so embarassed if anyone else knew. They all know.)

I know she's not perfect But she tries so hard for me And I thank God that she isn't 'Cause how boring would that be

~Ri~

Description: Duality by Set It Off

I can't quite contain or explain my evil ways Or explain why I'm not sane All I can say is this is your warning

Like: Burn It To The Ground by Nickleback

Well, it's midnight, damn right We're wound up too tight I've got a fist full of whiskey The bottle just bit me

~Idala~

Description: Doubt Me by Beartooth

Remember every time you doubt me It makes me stronger than before When you doubt me It fuels the fire even more

So give me all you got I can't wait to watch you rot If there's one thing you should learn about me Don't ever fucking doubt me

Like: Fight Song by Rachel Platten

My power's turned on (hey) Starting right now, I'll be strong (hey) I'll play my fight song (hey) And I don't really care if nobody else believes (ha) 'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

~Liura~

Description: Headphones by Banx & Ranx ft. Rêve

Sorry, not sorry Can't hear you calling One woman party And I'm feeling like You know how it be

Like: We Like To Party by Vengaboys

The wheels of steel are turning And traffic lights are burning So if you like to party Get on and move your body

~Teleri~

Description: Halley by <Unknown> (I swear this was a song the local country station used to play back in 2004. I'm not musically inclined enough to have invented it)

You can't stop the thunder from rolling

You can't catch lightning in a jar

You can't stop a comet from lighting up the night

And you can't hold Halley in your arms

Like: I Will Dance by Katzenjammer

(honestly their appeal for her is the music style, not the lyrics themselves)

I'm standing at the crossroads now, the fields of opportunities I'm ready to go anywhere, I'm full of hope and full of fear

~Zari~

Description: Make It Up by Sam Tsui

Does it look like I've got everything under control? I'm good at faking it

Alternate Description: Herp De Derp by  Bean, Stephon LaMar & The Gregory Brothers

One day I hope I'll find Someone who doesn't mind Being embarrassed by me all of the time

/

I could have anyone here except I'm extraordinarily socially inept

Like: anything Disney

🎵—⌈ oc song tag game ⌋

woo! song game! >:3 thanks for the tag @willtheweaver, I love these kinds of games. there are some absolutely stupid songs some of them would love (nemesis bops to the fruit salad song unironically) so I did these as comfort songs for them specifically

Rules ; share a song to describe your character and a song they’d love

◈—« nemesis »

description — dear arkansas daughter . lady lamb

You with the dark curls, you with the watercolor eyes You who bares all your teeth in every smile Says I can always hear you sing, I wanna hear you speak to me While a stranger braids my hair back out on the street And in your dreams we are shooting at snakes And while you were asleep, I was surely awake

love — it's alright . mother mother

It's alright, It's okay, it's alright, it's okay You're not a demon, there's a reason You behaved in that way It's alright, it's okay, it's alright, it's okay And I believe, yes I believe that you will see a better day It's alright, oh, it's okay, oh, it's alright, oh

◈—« judge »

description — it tore your heart out . dirt poor robins

We brave into the labyrinth No prior plan for our descent But charge in hand that might implore The circuits of the minotaur Fire with Fire Bolt for bolt The god of the maze will meet our ghost And Hearts again might understand The sap of tree, the blood of man

love — 命に嫌われている。majiko

I might just die tomorrow you know, everything might just end up being for naught. Mornings and nights, spring and autumn, unchanging, someone dies somewhere. I don't need dreams or even a tomorrow, If you'll have lived on then that's all I need. Yeah... That's actually what I want to sing about

◈—« halliday »

description — amsterdam . nothing but thieves

So I hit my head up against the wall Over and over and over and over again, and again 'Cause I don't wanna be like them I hit my head up against the wall Over and over and over and over again, and again, and again

love —call your mom . noah kahan

Don't let this darkness fool you All lights turned off can be turned on I'll drive, I'll drive all night I'll call your mom Oh, dear, don't be discouraged I've been exactly where you are I'll drive, I'll drive all night

◈—« desmond »

description — 2BU . wild beasts

Give me your house, give me your things I’m in your head, I’m in your dreams I want your face, I want your skin I want your name, I want to live I want everything

love — mary on a cross . ghost

We were searching for reasons to play by the rules But we quickly found out it was just for fools Now through all the sorrow, we'll be riding high And the truth of the matter is I never let you go, let you go

tagging: @tananaphone @awritingcaitlin @juls-writes @ryns-ramblings @lorenfinch @maddstermind @littleladymab @ladywithalamp @surroundedbypearls @morriguscrawls @wintherlywords @chiefwritesbook @k-v-briarwood and anyone else who wants to do this tag game!

[jadenfanm]

JIJI ak zanmi l : Kwonik yon adolesans ayisyèn

Epizòd 6 : Pawol libere

Gertrude matant Chacha remake depi kèk tan, anpil chanjman kay nyès li. Chacha fèmen sou li menm, li pèdi apeti. Li deside poze l kesyon.

Gertrude. - W ap dekrenmen nan menm san konn sa w genyen ! Mennen w lopital, fè pakèt egzamen, se pa maladi doktè ! Fè te, ba w beny, lapriyè, liminen sou tonm manman w, se pa malfezan y ap fè w. Anyen pa enterese w, menm lekòl ou refize ale. M ap swiv ou lontan Chacha, sa pral gen plis ke twa mwa la depi se konstate m ap konstate w ap etenn nan menm san m paka fè anyen pou sa, paske w pa pale avè m. Se fèmen tèt ou nan chanm san pran lari.

M pap ka antere w aprè manman w, m pap gen kouraj sa. Si se alèz ou pa alèz lakay mwen fò w di m sa. M pa gen konsyans mwen fè w anyen ki mal, men w gendwa pa wè bagay yo menm jan ak mwen. Si se manman w ou sonje, mwen sonje l tou. Men se konsa nou leve nou jwenn bagay yo, moun fèt, moun mouri. Sa gentan gen yon lane men gen de jou m viv absans li komsi sete avan yè li te ale kite nou.

Fò w pale ak matant ou Chacha. M konnen m pa yon moun ki fasil, men m vle w konnen se sou mwen ou ka konte.

Chacha. - Matant se pa malad mwen malad. Se pa anyen ou fè m ki mal. M sonje manman chak jou, men lanmò an se te yon delivrans pou li, li t ap soufri twòp, kansè a te gentan fatige tout kò l.

Matant m wont anpil. M paka pataje sa ak pèsòn. M pa vle pou w desi de mwen, ni pou w dekouraje avè m.

Gertrude. - Fò w depoze chay sa ki twò lou pou ou a. M bouke ap chèche konprann sa w genyen, m fè tout vye panse, tout vye rèv. Kisa ki domine w konsa Chacha jouk ou pèdi gou pou lavi ?

Chacha. - Matant m konnen w pral jije m. M gentan mande w padon davans pou sa.

Ou sonje m te k pale w de pwofesè ki te di l ap ede m antre nan inivèsite leta a. Ou te di m m gen tan toujou pou m deside kisa m vle fè paske m ka chanje lide lè m gen 18 tan.

Gertrude. - Pwofesè syans sosyal m kwè w te di m li ye. Ou te di m se neve direktè a.

Chacha. - Wi. Li rele Ismael. Li te pwofesè m nan klas fondamantal yo.

Gertrude. - Di m non Chacha, li fè w yon bagay ? Gon move bagay ki pase ?

Chacha. - M pat di w sa, men lè m t ap soti kay madan Guerrier an, li te pran randevou avèm pou m te ka al konn kay li.

Gertrude. - Wi. Depi mwa dawout, lè m te voye w al pot kòb la bay Madan Guerrier pou mwen an.

Chacha. - M pat pran sa pou anyen. Kò m mwen wè son moun ki koul anpil. Li te tounen yon zanmi pou mwen. Malgre l te konn fè vye jwèt ak lòt medam yo lekòl la, li pat janm te konn fè m anyen, ni di m okenn move pawòl.

Lè m rive a, li fèmen pòt la, malgre m dil non epi m pouse l plizyè fwa, li bo m. Li goumen avè m, li retire jip la sou mwen. Lè l wè m gen règ mwen li pa ale pi lwen.

Gertrude kontinye tande san l pa di anyen.

Aprè sa, li al kondui m, gon élèv ki wè m avèl epi ki mache fè tout moun konnen mwen te renmen ak mèt la.

Zanmi lekol yo te di m fòk mwen pote plent pou li paske sak rive a grav anpil. Te menm gen yon matant Jiji ki te kòmanse akonpanye m, ede m fè demach pou pote plent. M pa konn si se konnen mèt la vin konnen... direktè a rele m, li di m se mwen ki te pèdi wòl mwen epi mesye a pa fè m anyen se manti m ap fè sou li. Depi l tande pawòl sa pa sispann, l ap mete m deyò nan lise a avan m gate rès elèv yo.

Depi lè sa, pakèt moun ap rele m sou nimewo maske, di y ap touye m, y ap touye w si m kontinye fè pawòl sou mèt Ismael.

Menm lekòl mwen vin pè ale, paske mèt la toujou lòt bò a, epi l ap plede voye rele m, l ap aji komsi m te gon relasyon avèl. Elèv ap ri m, ap fawouche m.

M santi m koupab, paske m te al lakay li.

Gertrude. – M ap tande w, se komsi son move rèv. Tout bagay sa yo t ap pase, epi m pa janm rive wè sa. Ou travèse tout difikilte ak imilyasyon sa yo pou kont ou ! M

konnen w son moun ki fò anpil men lè yon bagay konsa rive w se pou w pale ak yon granmoum.

Devwa m se pou m pwoteje w Chacha, ou genlè bliye sa.

Se pa paske w pa t di m ou t ap prale kay mesye a pou w pa t vin di m li manke mete men sou ou. Sa tèlman bèl pou kriminèl la, li fè kò ak lòt vyolè parèy li a, pou kontinye ap tizonnen w epi baw presyon !

Se ou ki viktim nan sak pase a ! Ou pa gen pou w pè pale sa ! Ou pat dwe janm wont mwen jouk pou w paka vin pale sa ak mwen !

Bondye tande m sa pa p pase konsa ! Pou direktè a oze rele w pou l blame w ! Pou malgre krim mouche a manke fè sou ou a pou l kontinye ap griyonnen w ! Tout san nan kò m ap bouyi lè m di w sa ! Tonnè boule m yo jwenn !

Se dènye pitit fi moun li agrese. Li bout ! Met rad sou ou, nou pral nan òganizasyon fanm ki Pako a ! Moun ki t ap rele w nan telefòn bay presyon di y ap touye m yo, m pral bay yo yon rezon.

Se dènye fwa pou w kache m yon bagay konsa. Ou gendwa pou w gen sekrè ak vi prive, men depi sa mete lavi w an danje ak diyite w ou pa dwe fèmen bouch, ni kenbe sa pou ou. Pa janm kite moun baw pote fado peche yo.

Se tande m tande isit pa gen jistis, kèlkeswa jan sa ye, mèt Ismael ap peye chè sa l fè a ! Direktè a li menm humm... sa m wè pou li Antoine na konbye pa wè l !

Eeeyyyyy ! Claire-Heureuse mwen monte m ! M pa janm sezi konsa ! Pran telefòn nan pou mwen, fòk mwen rele avoka Maryse. Mezanmi janm frajil ! Direktè Anisette ak

tout mèt Ismael mèt pare yo, pral gen prizon nan bagay sa !

Andrise PIERRE

[loveisanactofblood]

1)​Hai vogli​a di fare quest​o test:​ No. 2) Cosa farai​ appen​a finir​ai quest​o test: boh, dormirò forse 3) Nick:​ mabbasta 4) Anni:​ no. 5) Prima​ cosa che ti viene​ in mente​:​ devo prepararmi la roba per domani 6) Biond​a o Mora: Mora. 7) Fumi:​ no 8) Hai la ragaz​za: ragazzo 9) Credi​ in Dio: No 10) Ti sei mai ubric​ato:​ Naaaa guarda 11) Londr​a o New York: mai stata a NY quindi... 12) Come si chiam​a la tua migli​ore amica​: Ne ho più di una 13) Come si chiam​a il tuo migli​ore amico​:​ è lui. 14) Bikin​i o costu​me inter​o:​ Bikini 15) Nord,​Sud,​Ovest​ o Est: Est 16) 883 o Ramaz​zotti​:​ 883 17) Britn​ey o Avril​:​ Britney 18) Segno​ zodia​cale:​ Toro. 19) Ascen​dente​:​ Scorpione. 20) La ragaz​za più bella​ su cui hai mai posat​o gli occhi​:​ oh ne ho avute di cotte U_U 21) Stere​o a tutto​ volum​e?​ No, mi innervosisce 22) La canzo​ne che ti viene​ in mente​:​ Today degli Smashing 23) La canzo​ne più dolce​ che ti viene​ in mente​:​ be my angel 24) Tieni​ un diari​o:​ non più 25) Se fossi​ un anima​le:​ gatto 26) Numer​i pari o dispa​ri:​ Dispari 27) Ti piace​ la scuol​a:​ aaaaah. 28) Quant​e ore passi​ davan​ti alla tv: poche 29) Che libro​ stai legge​ndo:​ Purity 30) Film Disne​y:​ Peter Pan 31) La vacan​za più bella​ che hai mai fatto​: non ne ho idea, troppe... forse Dublino 2013, o il giro repubblica ceca\slovacchia\polonia 32) Dove vorre​sti esser​e:​ ovunque ma non qua forse. 34) Coper​ta o Piumo​ne:​ Piumone. 35) Come dormi​:​ di lato 36) L’ult​ima volta​ che hai piant​o:​ mboh 38) Quant​i figli​ vorre​sti avere​: 2 39) Che cell hai: huawei. 40) Blue o U2: U2. 42) Good Charl​otte o Green​ Day: mboh 43) Jeans​ o Gonna​: gonna. 44) Hai anima​li:​ Sì 45) Qual è la cosa più bella​ che un ragaz​zo potre​bbe fare x te: regalarmi un viaggio U_U 46) Qual'​è la cosa più bella​ che un ragaz​zo ha mai fatto​ per te: sto da più di 4 anni con la stessa persona, ma chi se le ricorda ...? 47) Smalv​ille o OC: Oc 48) Sei timid​o:​ Molto 49) Com’è​ la tua camer​a: Piccola e piena di poster 50) Hai pierc​ing:​ Sì 51) Stai bene con te stess​o: ma si dai. ​ 52) Natal​e o Capod​anno:​ Capodanno 53) Con chi hai litig​ato l’ult​ima volta​:​ mboh 54) Ti trucc​hi:​ Sì 55) Hai tatua​ggi:​ sì. 56) Canta​nte che più odi al mondo​: pffff 57) Perch​é:​ sì 58) Il primo​ cd che hai avuto​: Hybrid theory, Linkin park 59) Cosa vuoi fare oggi:​ dormire 60) Sport​ prefe​rito:​ Basket 61) Ti sei mai innam​orato​:​ sì 62) Anche​ al punto​ di piang​ere: certo 63) Cinem​a o Teatr​o:​ Entrambi 64) Ti ritie​ni fortu​nato:​ il giusto 65) Come ti senti​:​ Stanca. 66) Ti piaci​:​ ma si dai 67) Estat​e,​prima​vera,​autun​no o inver​no: inverno ed estate. ​ 68) Frutt​o:​ mboh 69) La cosa più falsa​ che hai mai detto​: ...mboh

[beloveddawn-blog]

Happy STS! (I mean, it's not Saturday, but it is still a day beginning with S—barely) Tell me about how your characters communicate long-distance: phone call, letters, texting? What is the style they individually do this in?

Liura canonically trades letters with her family. The merchants convey them. Davan has official paperwork as part of his work as Lord Protector, which would travel by herald, probably.

Idala's summons in the prequel was probably a sending spell. Her family is immensely magical and likes to show off in that way. Something she would have to trigger, like letter shaped. I'm undecided if it would be a projected image (show offs) or written (dig at her dyslexia). After that whole cluster fuck she has her patron god block any further attempts to contact her by magic. Her raven avatars are eventually used occasionally as messengers, and they just reproduce the message perfectly, like a VN.

Other than that they don't really need to do that. Exile's Rest isn't a place you end up if there were other options, after all. All of the main cast have no contact with anyone outside the city, which isn't that big really. It was only established a dozen or so years back.

If they were to need long distance communication, it would mostly be letters. And their styles would be thus:

Liura- formal and proper, but warm

Davan- casual. Easy to tell he's farm raised. Uses a lot of cowboy slang without realizing no one else understands

Ri- reads like a report. He's definitely doing it under duress. Unless it's to Davan in which case it's the sappiest love letter anyone has seen. There might be poetry. Anyone else would be too embarrassed to send it but he's unashamed in his devotion.

Idala- uses magic or dictates it to a scribe. Reads like a report. You'd think she was paying by the word.

Caedecus- distantly warm. Very "my esteemed colleague" even to Idala. Any directives are given in a very roundabout way to avoid offence or being bossy

Will- formal and non-committal. Occasionally forgets himself and uses the Royal We as he was taught.

Nedrys- blunt and short. Rarely includes any salutations. If it's going home it always includes cool rocks or leaves or little drawings for his kids, but no words.

Ashlyn- casual and friendly, if a bit gossipy

Verity- voted Most Likely To Use Bulletpoint Lists in Letters. Report-like. Reads like she thinks someone's gonna go through and redact any dangerous info, so she doesn't include it

[beloveddawn-blog]

@coffeeangelinabox

Ri, but everyone knows except Davan

collection of posts for a very specific dynamic

[beloveddawn-blog]

Girl With a Pearl Earring, The Swing, and Paper for the ask game!

Girl With a Pearl Earring: There's a bit in one unnamed section (working title: Ri Flips a Literal Table at his First Diplomatic Function) where the outfit he's given for it is used to expand on how much bigger the world is than the village both Ri and Davan grew up in is. It's very much a "big fish in a small pond" moment.

The Swing: A lot of it, to be honest. Although there is a main plot, it's actually background that suddenly comes to the forfront. The majority of it is a group of very traumatised people fumbling their way through overcoming their pasts. The whole thing is very centered on how pecious they find those moments and how they're learning to allow themselves to have them.

Paper: Two of the council members are currently included only by their job description, but they'll have to be main characters as part of the ensemble in Book 1/the prequel (the short story that spawned the universe will be set early in Book 2)

[beloveddawn-blog]

Your mystery question is here! :)

Moon: Does your character have a dark side? What makes their dark side come out?

Hahaha, Ri is entirely dark side. He's a sociopath who has murdered in cold blood. But his Favourite Person is a human cinnamon bun, and he'll do literally anything to keep Davan safe and make him happy, so usually he's actually a pretty upstanding member of society! Because then Davan is proud of him and his days have meaning! (It is... not a healthy relationship)

Davan really doesn't. He's a very classic Captain America-fairy tale hero sort of character. Ri's nickname for him literally means 'compass' because he's as reliable and true as one.

Liura also doesn't really. She believes in self sacrifice to an extent Davan doesn't, but is otherwise very similar to her best friend.

Idala is pragmatic and determined, and is known to light people who get in her face on fire. She's easily the best person her family has ever produced, but also that bar is in hell. She relies on Davan a lot to be her moral compass because hers is broken. Her dark side is often her go-to, which she's slowly unlearning.

Caedecus approaches all situations with compassion and mindfullness, as he was granted neither as a slave. He's only recently discovered that he's actually wildly succeptible to possessiveness and jealousy, but Idala's worse so he always looks good in comparison. He would pick Idala over the prophesy he's part of in a heartbeat in general, but the fact that it would subject an entire continent to bloody slavery gives him pause. It's very close, but eventually Idala's patron god solves the issue by bringing his ancient powers to bear and eradicated the conquers and puts the Child of Prophesy on the throne without doing any of the actual prophesy bits. He does this because Idala is pregnant and she's his favourite, so he makes sure the father doesn't have to go crusading.

Will is a loveable doofus, but is perfectly capable of prioritizing his family to the point of flat out ignoring others. At this point it's not clear if he was disowned or if he disowned his birth family (royalty), but he would slaughter them all in a heartbeat if they ever dare approach Exile's Rest again (his brother said that since his wife wasn't noble his children should be 'disposed of' so they didn't pollute the bloodline)