#SORRYYYYYY IM IN A BAD MOOD!!!

[mildmayfoxe]

i busted my ass the last two days at work to get three wholesale orders going out today finished even though it’s NOT my job (& in fact to detriment of my actual job) because neither of the two people responsible started them over the weekend (like they should have) or even as far as i know realized they existed & neither of them said anything to me about it in either thanks or apology when i came in today, the first time i’ve seen them this week. lmao. ok! see if i pick up your slack again!

[tomdiddlyumptious]

Tom Holland x black reader getting caught fucking in his childhood bed and his parents making reader and Tom talk about it in a family meeting 💀💀

Oop-

Summary: que?

Warnings: smut and an awkward situation. Cringy smut of course, yelling ar new borns- LaNgUaGe

T.H| I’m Sorry You Said What?

You and tom rode in the car, bumping to something random on the radio as you both made your way back to his old home. Youve been there before but it was nice to come back after a while.

“Y/n?” “What?” You asked looking at him. “I love you” “ewwwww” you stuck out your tongue, he rolled his eyes and smacked his lips while you giggled.

“Im sorryyyyyy” “no your rude” tom shook his head unbuckling himself. “It was a simple joke! Its not my fault you couldnt take it!” He glared at you “you suck” “you swallow” “you choke” “i- i do” you admit making him laugh “ i wont lie” you shrugged and hopped out the car, closing the door behind you.

You both walked to the door and he held on your waist pressing a kiss to your forehead. He knocked and was met immediately with his father with a bib on. “Whats the bib for?” “Im trying to online teach kids how to eat neatly” “they must be newborns for that-“ you bud in.

“Exactly- its to mad in there” “they dont even know theyre moving how do you expect them to know how to raise a fork” nikki asked making you all laugh as dom shrugged but opened the door more inviting you both in. Tom stepped in after you both and you shared hugs before he pulled you into his room. “Thomas is this your room?” “Yes” “why is there a one direction poster?” “I love Niall Horan” he shrugged and shut the door.

Your eyebrows furrowed at him in confusion “I would take you as more of a zayn fan” “well there goes something new, and I know about your obsession with Harry styles already, do NOT rub it in” he demanded making you giggle, you took off your shoes and laid in his bed, which was comfy, not firm like yours used to be, but as long as you had a roof over your head everything was goddamn fine🙄.

Thomas decided to lay down next to you and you still looked around “I’m supprised you don’t have twilight in here” you giggled “shut up” he chuckled and laid his head in your breast, you played with his hair and tugged it a bit making him let out a small groan “Thomas don’t-“ “you tugged my hair!” “This is your childhood room for heaven sakes” “let’s make more memories then!” He suggested. “You get on my nerves’ you smacked your lips as he reached up to kiss your neck and slowly make his way to your sweet spot. “I want youuuu” he sung.

“But I dontttt” “yes you doooo” “okay maybeeee” “I’m gonna take off your clothessss” “go aheadddd”you moaned a little bit from his nibble on your sweet spot as he trailed his hands down your stomach giving you goosebumps. Your turned your head to meet his lips, “did I ever tell you how amazing you look today?” “No”

“Well-“ he cut himself off, you just love to ruin the mood all the time. “Ay don’t blame me if anything you did because were in your childhood bed right now” “I’m gonna fuck you and that’ll make you be quiet, won’t it?” You just sighed at his words, but letting the blood flow south.

“Actually it won’t, I’d make you scream and let everyone hear- (this is your family for heaven sakes😭)” he mumbled, playing with the hem of your underwear and you let out a low moan. “Yeah i know youd like that, naughty girl (😭😭 i cant)”

He gently rubbed your pearl over your paintes while you unbuckled his pants, palming him through his jeans feeling his hard. He let out a groan and pressed harder on your clit making you whine and buck your hips onto his hands.

“AH” you both jumped and looked at the door seeing it was still shut you sighed in relief. “NO NO WHAT ARE YOU DOING? STOP THE FORK DOESNT GO ALL THE WAY DOWN YOUR THROAT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW- IM TELLING YOUR MOM- WHAT WHAT- DONT CRY PLEASE STOP ILL GET IN SO MUCH TROUBLE”

Tom groaned by the buzzkill of his father, but let out laughs in your neck. “Just make it quick tom” you whispered against his forehead kissing it, he nodded and got up, walking to the door and you stood to, taking off your pants while he made sure it was locked, when he looked back he saw you struggling and tripping over your shoes making him chucke before walking over and making yiu stand straight, right before pinning you to the wall.

He took your hands and yanked them over your head making you clench your legs together. “Open up” he demaned softly, putting his knee in between your legs and opening them before looking at you. “Your so beautiful baby girl” he kissed you, biting your lip. “Dont move your hands? Hear me?”

“But it will start to hurt” you pleaded but he only tsked at you and told you to follow his orders before pulling down his pants and boxers a bit to pull himself out, you both still had clothes on, well you didnt have your jeans on (which is so fuckin unfair) and your shoes but he kept his on.

He took his hands and pressed his chest against your to keep you in place before he lifted your legs around his hips and used a single hand to pull your panties to the side. He spit in the tip of his fingers before runnjng them through your folds “oh- your already soaked” he said before coning cocky “i didnt even do anything yet” “please fuck me already” you begged and he smiled, watching as he slipped himself in, a moan leaving both of your lips.

He started to fill himself in you while you struggled to keep your hands in place. He groaned pumping in you, fucking you against the wall, he hooked his hands under your knees and pushed them closer to the walls to open you up. “Fuck tommy” you gasped, your head leaning back against the wall and he took the chance to lick and suck on your sweet spot, to hot in the moment to remember where he is.

“Fuck y/n your so tight- shit-“ he felt you clench, he started to harder but slow, the sound bouncing off the wall as you swallowed your moans. “Shit- tommy” your back arched off the wall, your arms to tired and heavy so they went around his shoulders and your head in his neck. “You tired baby?“

“UMMMMM” nikki said, both of your heads whipping around. “MOM-“ she slammed the door closed before anything else could happen.

“Dinner is in 15 minutes- uhhhh dont be late. Make sure to clean up” she said leaning up against the door “and please dont ya know-“ she nervously chuckled “finish” “IT WASNT LIKE THAT I SWEAR”

“Thomas it’s obvious” you glared at him, when he pulled out of you a sigh left your lips. “I swear i locked the door” he said putting himself back, watching you as you got yourself together. “Does it really matter now?” He only shrugged in response.

Toms cheeks were scarlet while you tried to get yourself to stop shaking so much. “It cant be that bad, right?” You held onto his arm for strength. “I mean it should all be fine cuz like- they did it to have me!” “Yeahyeahyeah” you nodded, kinda getting confident. “Lets just go” you pulled his arm to the dinning room, meeting a pair of 2 eyes starring at you both.

You all just sat there in silence, all of your movements halt as you made eye contact with nikki and tom made eye contact with his dad. “Dont be shy now, its only dinner” nikki said, placing the plates infront of the seat.

You looked at tom and he did a small nod walking right behind you to sit in the seats right next to each other.

“If you couldnt already tell we are having- erm spaghetti” she smiled trying to ease the tension but it was to thick.

After everyone took a couple bites you sipped the water. “Would you care to explain what happened-“ you choked on the water at doms words, the water shooting out of your nose while everyone looked at you. “I drank it to fast- haha” you faked a laugh, cleaning yourself up with the napkin.

“I didnt know you could do that....” tom said before looking at his dad. “We uhhh had ya know” tom looked away, feeling his ears start to burn up. “Ya know???” Nikki comments.

“You knowwwww like uhmmm” “clearly child” dom said glarring at him. “Who had the idea?” “I think we both know who”

You lifted your arms up in defense “it wasnt me” tom smaced his lips at you and you looked at him shrugging “it wasnt!” “You told me to make it quick!-“

“THOMAS” “whaaaat?! Its true!” “You still started it!”

Nikki and don watched the fued between as you to continued to complain and fight. “You were clearly being to loud thats why we got caught!-“

“Actually i heard thuds against the wall soooo” nikki spaced off as you glarred at him. “Who was making to much noise?” You lifted an eyebrow before he rolled his eyes and turned his chair a bit to not look at you.

“Did you use protection?” Dom asked. “Uhhh no” tom said. “Why not?” Nikki butted in. He only shrugged. “You need to use protection” “no we dont”

Nikki tapped behind her ear “what did you say?” “We will use protection” tom changed his mind. “Aha and how did you get that mark on your neck” nikki turned to you.

“I-uh burned my neck with the curling iron!” “Your hair isnt in curls” you bit your lip at her words “yeah welp i gave up after and dumped my hair in water” dom tried to read toms face and body language “it looks like a bruise, how high was the temperature?” Nikki asked, slightly concerned. “I have no idea”

“Just- why here?” Tom starred at nikki “i dont know i was just caught in the moment~” “dont you only say that when your a virgin doing it-“ “y/n we are supposed to be a team!” “Im just saying!”

“Before you both argue again.....” nikki said stopping the pot from boiling. “I just want to say that i hope your both happy and no longer sexually aroused”

“Nikki!” “What?! I have to say that Dominic!” “No you didnt, but if you dont mind i have to be leaving now, i have to teach the babies how to read” dom stood and took his plate to the kitchen, soon everyone done with their meal as you sat in silence washing dishes with nikki.

“Are you planning on making me a grandma?” She whispered, handing you the wet dish. “No not really” you sighef, drying the dish. “That sucks” “yep”

“But like why not!” “Toms busy with work and all do i dont want him to feel to responsible” “i have to agree on that one, barely wants to wipe his ass” “nikki!” You whisper yelled as she giggled, passing you anothet plate as you put the old one back.

“I know how it feels- dom cant keep his hands off of me” she winked as your eyes widened at her. “What! Im old not dead y/n” “you are not old nikki and plus i dont wanna know that!” “Hey im just letting you know” she shrugged.

“Dad she isnt pregnant and wont be anytime soon” “just bring me the babies! I will teach them how to cook, clean, eat-“ “thats our job dad”

“Well its better then these babies- WHO WONT STOP CHEWING ON THE BOOK-“

“WAAAAAAA”

“OH GOD PLEASE STOP CRYINGGG BLOODY HELL” dom said, snatching the ipad. “But please dont have sex in my house, thomas” dom glared at him while tom aggressively nodded his head.

“S-seth”

“THATS A NO NO WORD- STOP SAYING THAT” dom yelled again, stressing himself out. “WHY ARE YOU EVEN DOING IT IN THE FIRST PLACE?” Nikki yelled from the kitchen, walking infront of you into the livingroom.

“BECAUSE THESE BABIES ARE GONNA BE VERY SMART- IF THEY COULD FECKING LISTON (i did that on purpose)”

“f-fe-“

“Dont you even” he pointed at the new born through the ipad.

“Seth!”

“DOMINIC!”

[cake-in-a-tin]

welcome to our mayhem

hi! Welcome to my first attempt at a text fic, idk how good it ‘tis, but let me know what you think! (lils-Lily, burgerz-Mary, queen-Marlene, wonderland gurl-Alice, dork-Dorcas)

tHe BaEs

Lils: yo dudes

Burgerz: waddup

Lils: imma add this girl who’s joining tomorrow if that’s ok - we’re old friends from like nursery

Queen: sure, is that dorcas meadowes ?

Queen: I think I’m her tour guide or some shit

Wonderland gurl: sorry I was sleeping

Wonderland gurl: what did I miss

Queen: wHaT dId I mIsS

Queen: hEaDfIrSt InTo A pOlItIcAl AbYsS

Burgerz: i been in paris meeting lotsa different ladayys

Wonderland gurl: I guess I practically missed the late eightaysss

Queen: travelled the whole wiiideee world and came back to this

Lils: pleeeeassse not again....

Lils: mar I thought you were on my side???

Queen: sorryyyyyy

Queen: I couldn’t resist it

Queen: it was perfect!

Wonderland gurl: it was indeed. I set you up fuckin perfectly u are very much welcome biatch

Burgerz: *slow claps in appreciation*

Lils: anyways imma add this girl now, she is dorcas mar and she’s lovely so be nice!

Lils added Dork

Lils: welcome to our mayhem love 

Dork: hii 

Lils: shall we all like introduce ourselves?

Queen: k, I’m first

Queen: hello, I am Marlene McKinnon, and I’m your stupid tour guide thing that Dumbledore thought was a good idea

Burgerz: hi, I’m Mary MacDonald (hence the name) and I’m very bad at maths, which is also my only personality trait

Wonderland gurl: hello there, my name is Alice Fortescue (don’t try and spell it it took me almost seven years of my life) and I have a fucked up sleep schedule tm

Lils: everyone knows me uwu 

Dork: okay, im Dorcas Meadowes, and I’m just a bi disaster haha

Queen: lol mood

Wonderland gurl: oh btw dorcas we are all lgbtq+ soo 

Dork: okay cool 

Queen: ya, I’m gay, lils is pan, mary is aroace and alice is queer

Wonderland gurl: yh I’m figuring it out but ik girls are pretty as well so :)

Dork: can relate lol

Wonderland gurl: I should probably sleep it’s school and I haven’t slept properly in like three fuckin daysss

Queen: gurrrrllllll omg u r gonna dieee tomorrow

Wonderland gurl: ik im scared and it’s only seven thirty but i will sleep like four and a half hours of that because I just watch netflix aaahh

Burgerz: just gooo Ali, otherwise u will regret everything

Wonderland gurl: k byeee bitchez

Lils: bye

Queen: bye love

Burgerz: cheerio

Dork: bye I think?

Lils: we're all a mess, u get used to it dw 

Lils: also Mary can u get anymore stereotypical British omg

Burgerz: I’m sorry babe it’s in my natureeee

Queen: lol

Queen: I ghibhjfyfvbss

Dork: r u ok?

Queen: a frickin moth bro 

Queen: it attacked me and I’m scared because I didn’t see where it went

Lils: I’m rooting for you love

Queen attached a video

Burgerz : omg I’m dyingggg your voicem u sound so scared

Queen: lmao I was scared for my life if I’m being honest 

Dork: ahahahaha I’m laughing out loud and my cat is just looking at me like wtf is wrong with you human

Queen: u have CAT???

Burgerz: you have a cat? I must see him

Queen: lol we are on the same wavelength haha

Burgerz: ✨soulmates✨ Burgerz: but like platonically lol

Dork: here is mouse

Dork attached a photo

Queen: vvffdyujcndh 

Queen: so fuckin adorable

Burgerz: I LOVE him

Lils: I’ve seen him before and I love him, but I don’t think I ever asked - why mouse?

Dork: lmao we just thought it would be ironic

Dork: also he’s never caught a mouse or anything else in his life because he’s too damn lazy

Queen: omg I relate to mouse so much lol

Dork: honestly same 

Lils: dudes we should probs sleep if we want to be beautiful for school

Queen: ugh sleep is so overrated 

Queen: but yeah...

Lils: bye xxx

Burgerz: adios 

Dork: byeee

Queen: see yall tomorrow

Private message: Lils + Queen

Queen: yo, quick question

Lils: shoot

Queen: what does dorcas look like?

Lils: ummm idk, why?

Queen: eh no reason

Lils: she’s black, short dark brown hair, gorgeous blue eyes

Queen: so cute?

Lils: hell yeh

Queen: oh god save me

Lils: yh u will need prayers

Queen: aaaahh 

Queen: well gn 

Lils: night xxx

tHe BaEs

Wonderland gurl: good morning!

Queen: no it is not

Lils: I’m dyingggg cancel schools pls

Wonderland gurl: I slept fuckin amazingly last night soooo :)))))))

Dork: hjeicnefskd 

Dork: I can’t 

Queen: oop me neither mornings are my least favourite thing ever 

Lils: uggghhhhhh 

Lils: sooo jealous of Mary

Dork: why?

Wonderland gurl: she lives rlly close to school so she wakes uo super late and just walks

Dork: wow luckyyyy

Lils: ikrrrr

Queen: I want to sleep

Wonderland gurl: no! remeber what happened last time you were late?

Queen: oh god don’t remind me

Dork: do I even want to know?

Queen: nkt really lol

Queen: lily u tell it I need to shower

Lils: okayyy

Lils: get ready for a fuckin wild ride babe

Lils: so, we have this teacher called McGonagall and she’s the single most terrifying yet amazing person ever to teach us

Wonderland gurl: and that’s saying something trust me

Lils: she’s pretty chill until u do something that pisses her off. And one thing that pisses her off is people being late. Marlene was late because she couldn’t get her lazy ass out of bed, and she came into form time like ten minutes after the bell rang. as you can imagine, McGonagall was not at all pleased at this, and proceeded to give mar a lecture in front of the whole class and then give her detention for a whole week. Before school.

Wonderland gurl: Marlene looked sooo tired the whole week

Dork: wow, that is ✨brutal✨ Dork: remind me never to be late

Lils: will do x

Wonderland gurl: we have to remind Marlene every once in a while of the ‘‘incident’ to motivate her to get out of bed

Queen: I’m back dudes 

Queen: so you see dorcas that is why I am never ever late anymore because that week was absolute hell I am not going through again.

Queen: ever

Dork: honestly I’m scared to meet this teacher lmao

Wonderland gurl: nah she’s actually soo nice unless you get on her bad side

Burgerz: heyyyy

Lils: maryyyy

Dork: hello!

Burgerz: so, everyone ready for school?

Queen: pretty much, I’m on the train rn

Lils: same, I’m opposite her

Dork: oooh I am also travelling by train I will try to find u guys 

Queen: we are right at the end, if I see you I will scream ‘cheese’ as loud as I can

Lils: noooooo please, can’t embarrassing us in public wait at least a day

Queen: nope

Dork: u don’t even know what I look like lmao

Queen: I will know

Lils attached a video file

Dork: lmao i was terrified

Queen: it worked though 

Wonderland gurl: I’m so glad I get the bus and don’t have to endure this

Burgerz: wow. How are you not embarrassed Marlene?

Queen: idk, I guess I don’t care what oriole think lol

Dork: rEsPeCt

Dork: also please never again

Private message: Lils + Dork

Dork: LILY WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME MARLENE WAS ACTUALLY SO BEAUTIFUL IM DYING 

Lils: lmao sorry

Private message: Lils + Queen

Queen: oh god u were right she’s so hot helppppp

Lils: I’m praying 4 u

hii! I hope that you liked this mess, I’m probably going to continue it, so yeah, let me know what you think?

[squeakadeeks]

Dunno if it will help. But i belueve you are amazing person with great qualities and worth more that can be measured , either by weith, size, etc. Also you are an amazing artist and cosplayer

;-; that is so kind...heartfelt and pure...this is a wonderful message! thank you so much for taking time out of your day to be nice to me! 

and on that note, the person from before sent a lot of follow up messages, and Ive just decided...just to let it go, move on, and avoid the issue...AND TO EVERONE WHO SENT KIND MESSAGES:

I kept them! AND I'm going to read them on bad days to cheer me up bc you all are so kind ;-; I don't want to make any fuss about this, so if you can, also please no bad comments about the person, I want to keep this blog a happy, healthy, conflict free zone, we all come from different places and have different levels of understanding and perspectives you know??? aint a place for serious moods, only SILLY AND HUMOROUS MOODS 

(also super rip to the one person who I was going to send this message though, but I accidentally clicked “answer privately before being done, IM SORRYYYYYY) 

[vanchlo]

the assistant / chapter eighteen, “down”

hey there!!!!! woah it’s been so long, i am so so sorry!!! it’s so good to be typing all this up and making this post haha and its kinda weird trying to get back into it too, i missed picking the gif and little sneak peeks out for the post on here lol. i hope you’ve all been well and had great holidays!! well i came back to this chapter that was sitting around for awhile and i wrapped up the end of it, and so i figured i would post it. hopefully it isn’t utter trash haha. i really don’t know when the next chapter will be up or if i’m back with this story just to be honest with you, but i thought i would give it another try and my bf like really wanted me to try again for awhile lol hes pretty great, so you have him to thank lmao. i really wanted to say a big thank you to those of you who have sent me lovely messages about the story (im sorry if some got lost :( or i never replied to) and who have been so patient, it means the world and im so excited to share this new one with you because of your continued love and support for this story, because i know youre all so excited. it still amazes me honestly, you guys are the best. but yes i hope you like this, plz plz let me know what you think! i enjoy!!!! :-) 

p.s. - i can’t remember for the fricken life of me how i formatted their texts so be easy on me lol theres not a lot to work with or do, i hope theyre easy to understand :) ugh if only you could change the color of the font on here it would be so much easier sigh 

old chapterzzzzzz!

i know that i probably shouldn’t, and honestly i really don’t know if harry would give a shit, but i thumb at the corner of the file by the label. the fact of being in his hall and not knowing if i should do this or not makes it a little worse.

i take a breath before i stop in front of his closed door. rapping my fist against the door, i wait like any other time. and after harry told me the other day to just come on in if he doesn’t answer by the second time, to just let myself in if it’s something important, i do just that ever so nervously. and with the suspicious as shit file weighing heavily in my arms, i wrap my fingers around the cold tingy metal and twist. the creepy neck feeling and the hot nervous one like i did something wrong floods back to me in a tsunamic like wave when i spot the graying man standing by harry’s desk. 

with a gulp that becomes harder when his dark brown eyes cast over to me along with the weak dimples peeking out of his cheeks aged with lines, suddenly i feel not so great. 

it feels like everybody’s eyes are on the back of my neck when i eventually walk out of the bathroom and back to my desk. when i turn around, there’s nobody watching or staring or prying. just my messed up conscious and paranoid mind, because that’s nice. i discreetly run a finger under my eyes as i pull out the wheely chair and sit back down, lifting the top of my macbook to open it up. holding down the power button, the white apple logo soon appears on my screen. with a sniffle, i pull at the tight waist of these black dress pants before typing my password in.

the plain mountain background loads quickly, and a second later a soft chime sounds. and then there’s another. dragging my eyes to the top right corner of the shiny screen, i see the name i dread maybe the most.

(H in italics and B in bold-italics :-))

12:05pm

please try to be nice with

the costume, pretty

please with a cherry on top?

12:10pm

you’re making me nervous,

becks.

and a new chime just as this message comes in, all fresh and new.

12:23pm

you there, love?

yeah sorry. got busy.

it’s ok.

instead of replying, i venture to chrome and open my email to find too much freaking shit. the third or fourth email is from him, time stamped from around eight am. he probably finished the list up and sent it from home last night, which isn’t too weird for him. sometimes it comes the night before, if he’s feeling generous or something like that.

12:29pm

what’s this file you want?

what?

on the list. it just says ‘find the

heartwood file for me asap and bring

it to me’. you need to learn to be more

specific you know, i thought we talked

about this.

12:30pm

oh yeah. that. sorryyyyyy,  i

know we spoke about

it. yeah, i need the

criminal file on bertie

heartwood. it’s not on the

online database as a digital file, so

you’ll have to go down

to the basement where

they keep all of the real paper ones.

you’ve been down there

the one time right? it

wasn’t too bad, huh?

yeah it was a jolly old time, i loved the

creepy old geezer sitting in the door shoving his face with a twinkie who couldn’t help me for shit. i almost had

an asthma attack from all of the dust

and i don’t have asthma!

damn you’re hilarious,

becks.

shutup, i’m being serious.

:) 

don’t send me a fucking smiley face.

first i have to do all of that awful filing

and now i have to go down to the

basement to the papers room where who knows

how many rats live with the creepy old

guy staring at my bum and boobs. watch, i probably

will never even get back up here to

17 because the elevator will have

stopped working, or the weirdo shanked me and i bled out. and god, don’t even

get me fucking started on the

cobwebs down there.

language! and would you chill out? there

are no bloody rats in my

law firm

i heard something the last time i was

down there trying and failing to find

that witman file for you, and i turned

around and i swear to god i saw a

tail, harry.

stop it, you did not see

a bleeding rat down there.

and i keep my firm

blooming spotless, so hush.

you still need to find a new clerk guy

down there who isn’t a 80 year old

who probably has an arrest or two

having to do with pedophilia and porn.

i bet you fifty pounds if you had the

techies look at his computer you’d find pornhub.com in his web history.

bloody hell becks. he

does not. jerry’s background

is spotless. ya really think

i’d take a bet on somebody

like that?

well all he does is basically just guard

about fifty dusty shelves of files, so

yeah maybee.

fuck you, you little shit.

uh no, i only get to call you that.

sure you do.

shutup.

can i pleaseeeeee not go down there?

i was considering it, but

not after all that lousy stuff

you said about the papers

room and nice old jerry.

he is not nice, harry! he’s so rude.

doesn’t even help me when i have a

question, scouts honor.

no way, you were a girl scout?

ya sell all those yummy boxes

of biscuits, too?

shut up.

ya better be nice, or i just

might make you come to

that ball with me after all,

you little shit.

stop calling me that, that’s my line.

would you rather i come down

and give you another nice

tour? i don’t really want to,

because i’m supposed to be

doing this skype call with

somebody from ny, and

hell thats why i asked you

to do it.

god, don’t be too honest there.

i’m sorry, just not looking forward

to this skype call. and amber

won’t stop blowing up my phone,

she’s in a real mood today.

what’s new with that?

be nice, becks.

i’m just stating the truth, that’s all.

his reply is lagged, and i tap my fingers against my thigh as i wait for the word ‘read’ to show up under my message. and more so for the little bubble to show up. i don’t know if i’m thankful or what when the t-rex rings and i drag my hand over with a huff to pick it up.

“styles and lawson, this is becky,” i answer the most mock cheerfully that i can do on a monday.

“hi, i was wondering who i could talk to about how i could go about setting up a consultation with mr. styles?” a chipper voice replies.

“i’m mr. styles’ assistant, so i can gladly answer that question for you,” i reply.

ten unnecessary minutes later, i finally set the phone down. and when i turn to wake up my computer, there’s a red bubble stuck to my little messages icon. with a shake of my head, i click on it and find harry’s texts. but i hardly get a chance to read them, when his name pops up in the corner of my screen again, but this time he’s calling me.

sticking my hand into my drawer, i pull my buzzing phone out and swipe my thumb across the screen.

“god, what do you want now?” i reply fake annoyed.

“ya betta watch it, becks. actually ‘m surprised ya answered, ya weren’t replying t’ me texts.”

“i’m sorry, i had to explain to some old lady on the phone that just because you’re such a greaaaat lawyer, that you don’t take all cases that come at you, and she wasn’t that happy because of that and because she doesn’t really know how to work email to send me a consult. actually i don’t think she even has one.”

“oh, i see. well sorry i blew up yer mac, but was hopin’ ya’d go an’ get that file fer me soon. pleeeease, becks?” he says, apology heavy in his tone, before it switches to something sickeningly sweet. what a little shit.

“can’t like, you call down there and just have them send it up somehow?”

“this isn’ a bloody post office, becks. ’s jus’ one li’l file, tha’s actually real important. an’ i need it, i wouldn’ ask ya t’ go get it if i didn’ need it.”

“suuuuure,” i sigh, browsing through this week’s list quickly, but it’s not much use because this isn’t the final length. it’ll just keep getting added to as the week carries on. the usual.

“come on, becks. i won’ make ya go down there fer awhile afta this, ok?”

“weak proposition, mr. lawyer,” i reply sassily, pushing my hair behind my ear as i open another email reading a consult from a possible client.

“‘m not gonn’ bribe you.”

“why not?”

“you cheeky li’l thing you, jus’ go get tha bloody file before i come out there.”

“wow, you’re soooo scary,” i tease, hearing his fed up huff.

“jus’ go get tha damn file, you bloody li’l shit,” he chuckles softly. “now i really hafta go, tha bloke’s s’posed t’ be callin’ any mo’ now.”

“no, wait!”

“whaaaat?” he groans.

“i forgot where i look down there, because you know there’s like fifty shelves with boxes of files on them.”

“bloody hell, becks, just ask jerry.”

“i am not talking to that creeper ever again in my life,” i whisper, lowering my voice when somebody walks by. “and he is soooo a creeper, harry! the last time i was down there, i was looking through a box of files that was on the bottom shelf, and when i looked up the bloke’s eyes were glued to my cleavage!”

what comes next is a little explosion of giggles from his side, and i have to resist rolling my eyes because it’s not as good when he can’t see it. since we’re on the phone, even though he’s like . . well right over there.

“becks, yer too damn funny fer yer own good, darlin’,” he gets out in a long titter, and i deal him back a sigh. “ok don’ botha with jerry then, but ’s organized by tha alphabet if i rememba right from tha last time i was down there. but yeah ’s just by last name, so it shouldn’ be too hard t’ find, love.”

“wow, thanks for calling me dumb.”

“‘m not callin’ you dumb, becks!” he laughs, and when i hear the familiar ringing sound faintly i know it’s his skype. “hey sorry, that bastard’s ringin’ me, so i gott’ go. but if ya ‘ave any troubles, jus’ text me an’ ‘ll try t’ get back t’ ya fairly quick.”

“ok, don’t get too bored,” i joke, hearing his sweet giggle for only a second.

“thanks, babe, don’ die down there,” he replies, and i only get a scoff in before he says a quick goodbye.

+

with a dreaded touch and an exaggerated groan, i stab the lit up plastic button labeled ‘bmt’ and take a few steps and turn to lean against the back wall of the elevator i’m alone in. with a soft hum, the doors squeeze back together and it starts to move down as i stare ahead at my blurry reflection in the shiny doors.

12:50pm

this really fricken sucks,

like a lot.

i stab my thumb at the ‘send’ button and let out a huff after pressing the lock button waiting to arrive in the moldy scary basement. the red led number above the doors falls one by one, sticking at ‘9’ before it drops again.

buzz buzz.

12:54pm

hush, don’t start being a

whine baby on me now.

i told you i won’t make you

go down there for awhile

after this.

you better not.

oh stop being so dramatic.

i think i got that from you.

you’re just hilarious.

why thank you.

now get off your phone and

go get that file.

i’m on the elevator as we

speak, god chill!

you chill, and stop taking the

lord’s name.

since when do you care?

doesn’t matter, now i gotta go.

this bloke is almost back from

whatever the hell he had to do,

and i gotta pay attention, this call

is important.

ok, sorry for bothering you.

don’t, you’re not bothering me.

why do ya always think you’re a

bother becks? but

text me if you need me for any

help with finding the file, and i’ll

try my best, i just might take a

bit to reply.

thank you, harry. you know

you’re probably the best, right?

:)

thanks, sweetheart :) you’re

pretty darn great yourself.

you’re welcome, and thanks :)

i wait for a quick witted reply, and after a little bit i think he should have replied by now with how quick his replies were coming. and so i stuff my phone away in my pocket, and look up to find the doors peeling apart. i take in a deep breath and step off the elevator, pulling my long gray sweater around me at the change of temperature. fuckkkkkk, i do not need this too.

with shivering shoulders and chattering teeth, i tiptoe down the hall - because well there’s not a fucking soul around and i feel like it’s too quiet and shit is going to echo - and soon spot the little sign that reads ‘file room’. but ever since i stepped my first foot into this form, it’s always been called ‘the papers room’ for a reason i don’t know, and that i should probably ask harry one day. or asher.

sure enough, wrinkly and graying and not to mention balding jerry whitter is sat at his black desk scrolling away on his silver desktop. probably looking at girl on girl action, or something really weird, i just have a weird feeling. it takes him too long to look up and when he does, i savor the look on his face because fuck i know he was looking at porn. that git.

with a forced smile stretching across his stubbly chubby cheeks, his thin lips you could hardly discern from his gray mustache part, “oh hullo, love. come down to find another file. ya need any help finding anything?” he says ever so cheerily, but i know it’s fake.

“uh no thanks, i think i got it,” i reply, trying a smile that he returns, but it’s last about a second. with a shiver and my arms pulled around myself, i walk past the wimpy coworker of mine dressed in a long sleeved gray button down and slacks. i don’t even want to think about those slacks and any other part of his body for that matter.

that thought gives me another shiver as i pass the tall gray metal shelves of cardboard box heavy with ancient files. all i know is that most of the files that harry and the other lawyers used and need these days are online digitally, and that somebody who’s not fucking jerry is in the process of scanning all of these to get them online. but i can imagine there’s a point where it’s just been enough, and what’s the point if you don’t need them? at least that’s what i think.

clearing my throat and trying to do the same with my mind, i bow my head and lift my hand to find the hot pink post it i scribbled down the info on, knowing i’ll most likely forget.

bertie heartwood

criminal files

1989

with a huff, i stuff it back away in the pocket of my sweater, pulling the front tighter across my chest. glancing a hasty look over my shoulder back at jerry, all i know is that i’m glad he’s not looking me up, and i don’t bother to see what he’s staring at on his computer. bad idea, becky, bad idea. and so i cross my arms over my chest, wincing at my annoying ass bra digging into my side as i look at the little sign on the very left of the shelf by the aisle. ‘a-f’ it reads. i try to hold back the groan as i walk down the long ass aisle, and turn to peek in the next one. like the other side, the very last shelf has another little sign reading ‘g-m’ and i drag my feet down to the beginning. first i go too far and i’m stuck in the g’s, and then when i veer to the right of the aisle i’m in the fucking j’s, because god. ughhhh.

i almost jump out of my fucking flats when my hip buzzes, and i look down to find the screen of my phone lit up. the smile is hard to push down at the sight of his words, and what they are.

12:55pm

it going alright? you get lost

down there, bub?

no, not yet. but apparently

finding the h’s in this aisle for

g-m is harder than it looks.

the screen goes dark as i stare at it waiting for his response, but it doesn’t come right away, and so i assume he’s caught up with his skype call. i don’t even know why he bothered anyways, especially since he joked somewhat about me leaving him alone. i turn my attention and eyes back to the boxes upon boxes of files waiting in front of me. after awhile, i finally get a little warmer and find the h’s. you’d think it wouldn’t be too hard to find ‘he-‘ especially when there shouldn’t be that big of a variety of files here, but yeah no. first there’s habergram. haberly. habittle. hack. hackney. hackman. like i’ve never seen so many ‘ha-’s in my entire life. what the fuck, harry?

my phone says it’s a few ticks away from quarter after one when i finally locate the ‘he-’s and then it’s not too bad then, considering ‘hea-‘ is right in the beginning, or so i hope. but after a minute or two, i finally finally the little label reading ‘heartwood, bertie’ and pull out the frayed dusty black file.

“ya find all that you need?” jerry questions when i walk up to his desk, much to my dismay.

“yep, thanks,” i answer, plucking a clicky pen from his coffee mug full of them. hmm so maybe the coffee mug of pens is a thing here, huh?

dreadfully so, i lean down and press the pen to the clipboard, but this time i remember to hold the file to my chest so the perv can’t look down my shirt. fucking gross. first i scribble down the date, time of 1:34pm, the name of the file as well as the handy dandy code on the lip of the file i have to locate first and then make it out and yada yada it’s too much work really, and finally i put down my autograph at the end.

jerry and i exchange small ‘thanks’ and he mutters a ‘bye’ i fully ignore, before i peel out of there and get back on the elevator afraid to be down there another minute more.

1:35pm

you still on the phone?

a dictionary sized ‘delivered’ pops up under my message after a moment, but no read receipt before i check my notifications and a few other things as the elevator brings me up. i’m happy when it sounds a long ding and the doors open, letting me breath again as i step out onto seventeen. the keys are clicking and the phones are a ringing as i walk back to my desk, veering for people in slacks and skirts rushing with their cups of tea and stacks of paper before i swing down harry’s hall. i know that i probably shouldn’t, and honestly i really don’t know if harry would give a shit, but i thumb at the corner of the file by the label. the fact of being in his hall and not knowing if i should do this or not makes it a little worse, so all i get is a glance of a wacky mugshot of a weird looking guy before i let it fall closed only a few steps away from harry’s door.

doing a once over for anybody busting me, even though i know it’s not going to happen or so i hope, i take a breath before i stop in front of his closed door. rapping my fist against the door, i wait like any other time. and after harry told me the other day to just come on in if he doesn’t answer by the second time, to just let myself in if it’s something important, i do just that ever so nervously. and with the suspicious as shit file weighing heavily in my arms, i wrap my fingers around the cold tingy metal and twist.

the creepy neck feeling and the hot nervous one like i did something wrong floods back to me in a tsunamic like wave when i spot the graying man standing by harry’s desk. with a gulp that becomes harder when his dark brown eyes cast over to me along with the weak dimples peeking out of his cheeks aged with lines, suddenly i feel not so great.

“u-uh can i help you with something, sir? i’m sorry, but nobody’s allowed in here without harry already-,” i begin, looking over his combed back thinning hair and broad-set frame.

“i got it, becks,” a voice says quickly, and when i turn my head, harry’s slipping into the room with his hard eyes set on the stranger standing in front of the both of us.

his emerald’s a different body of water from the man’s before us fall to me and i see something in his face that i don’t like. “are you sure?” i say quietly to him.

he nods his head and gives me a small smile, but i don’t know how much i believe it. “‘m sure, love, jus’ gimme a mo’ with him, alright?” he replies, patting my arm with his hand, and i don’t know why or how or what, but i catch his hand when it falls from me. it’s almost awkward and i don’t know what i’m doing or what my little half hatched plan is, but i hold it for a moment along with his gaze and last ditch murmur of his name. “’s fine, becks, promise. why dontcha go take yer break now, yeah?” he continues, giving me another reassuring smile that i don’t know if i can handle or accept, or whatever.

“ok,” i say, dropping his hand but not before i give it a little squeeze, one that he returns warmly. “let me know if you need anything.”

“will do,” he replies, before i turn away and head for the door, holding the image of his off smile and his whole off look in my mind. and the other thing sitting on his face that i don’t think i’ve ever seen before. nerves.

the door opens swiftly with a click, and as my back is to harry and the odd old guy, i hear the beginning of his brash voice. the voice of the other harry. “what, ya not know how t’ work a phone or sumthin’, can ya not gimme a quick ring befo’ ya jus’ swing by wheneva ya bloody like? i have a job ya know - people i represent an’ stuff i gott’ do, meetings i hafta go t’ an-“

“i bleedin’ built this place, ya not rememba that or sumthin’ . .” the stranger booms back in the same accent identical to harry’s, giving me a jump and making this whole thing even weirder. and with that, making me even more confused.

i blink hard before opening my eyes as the last bit of harry’s cold words spat at the stranger melt away from my ears with the distance i put between us, but i catch deep shouts and a raspy one in return. one i know all too well. and it hits me in the gut. because for some odd fucking reason, i want to spin around and stomp back over to his door and do i don’t know, something to get it to stop. to get the man to go away, a man i have a bad feeling about i know that already, and so i can wipe that scared nervous feeling from harry and make it all better.

but i know i shouldn’t and all of things, i know that i can’t. it’s not like that, and with a sad thought, i think it probably will never be like that. with another click, i step inside the break room and pop open the fridge, wishing the can of soda was something else. something still fizzy, but heavy to the taste and not sweet. something a happy medium like my favorite wine coolers, which only sends me into another dark thought about the man i just left. the man i care too fricken much about. fucking shit.

+

i knock the back of my middle knuckle against the screen of the kiosk, tapping hard at my numbers before pushing open the door to get back to work. i drop the black file i never actually put in harry’s hand on the last rack of the new little black file rack on my desk. i plop back down onto my chair, hearing a squeak i roll my eyes at. but my ass hardly hits the stiff chair when i hear shouting from far away and then a door slam, and when i think i recognize one of the voices, i fly out of that seat.

almost running, i bolt over to harry’s hallway in time to have the burly pissed old guy nearly charging past me. he gives me a dirty look that immediately reminds me too much of harry’s for some odd reason, before he rounds the corner and stomps away. with a gulp, my feet move again from being still and i carefully tread down to harry’s door. for what feels like the hundredth time, i hesitate when i reach my hand out to wrap around the door, but this time a feeling burns in my gut that i should and that i need to do this.

and with that, i turn the handle slowly even though an urgency pricks at my skin to turn it faster and harder, and everything else. i spot him almost instantaneously. back to me. shoulders taut and then shaking. little sad sounds carrying across the room from him.

i don’t know what to do. my body is rigid, every single fricken part of it. and so when i try to move my legs- hell just a muscle, i can’t. the fear immobilizes me. it restricts me as the pained sounds of what can only be his crying pricks at my ears, like the sharp end of little pins poking your skin, one by one, getting worse and worse. a breath is stuck in my lungs, not going anywhere along with the rest of me. and it only makes this worse, when i didn’t think that was an option.

all of a sudden the sniffles and the hoarse throaty sounds cease altogether, and i see his shoulders twitch. then a hand run through his impeccable curls that were messy for only a second, if that. all of a sudden he turns around and as if the sight of his red rimmed glassy eyes devoid of a care but riddled with emotion weren’t enough to send my mental self crashing to the ground, the look on his face when he sees me standing there with a foot out the door and the other in kills me altogether.

a syllable begins on his tongue i see. maybe my name. it pains me to even think it, but maybe another cry. or something possibly worse if that could happen: the beginning of a yell. the second one returns with a kick as i watch his eyes fill with tears again before he looks away with a knuckle to his eyes.

“i-i’m sorry, i don’t mean to barge in-,” i begin, but it all comes out wrong, and nothing right. it’s a mess, just like me. and well him, too. i don’t know what he’s thinking or doing, as his head is bent down looking at something on his desk, probably just finding something to do to occupy the embarrassment and the awkwardness that is all me. all fucking me. but i can’t blame him. because hell, i wouldn’t know what to do if he found me crying, well again. “harry,” is all that feels right and as i watch him poke his finger at a mini yellow legal pad with his gorgeous scrawling on it, a sob stutters in his throat. and i’m fucking gone.

within a blink or two, i’m standing in front of him. unsure of what to do. reach out, or go away. his adam’s apple bobs with a gulp before he lifts his chin slowly to look at me, and kill me with that defeated drowned look that makes me feel all sorts of horrible. for him. all for him. and because of what the fuck can i do?

but it’s more like what can’t i when i tug on his sleeve to bring him over to me until he’s close enough to wrap my arms around. that’s too late though, because his are already going around me and by the time i get mine around him, his face is bent into my neck with his hot tears melting into it. as he melts into me with throaty sobs leaving his lips.

i don’t know what to do, or what to say for that matter. i don’t even realize i’m doing it, or hell that i’m doing anything when i find my fingers lost in his hair combing through the end of his crazy curls, and drifting down to the long expanse of his back i rub in circles. through the easy silk of his shirt, i feel his taut strong back as it shakes with each hoarse cry and rises with a rattly breath that tickles against my now damp neck. we stand there for the next ten minutes, his head glued to my shoulder and my arms surrounding him and not moving an inch no matter how tired they get. but i hold onto him tight, my neck slick with tears and his breaths loud and hiccupy.

with every hiccupy cry that falls from his lips, my arms wrap around him a little tighter and my hands rub a little harder.