#Soapbox

[ladyoftheharbour]

can we please please please learn to differentiate between things that are good but devalued because of their association with women (caring for children, being compassionate), things that are neutral but seen negatively because of their association with women (the colour pink, having long hair), and things that are bad but associated with women because of misogyny (being materialistic, being stupid) because otherwise we’re gonna keep getting takes like “being gender nonconforming is anti feminist” and “not studying for your classes is feminist”

[hitsuzenhusbands]

[geronimostiltonofficial]

im so fond of medea hadesgame. lives in a city littered with rotting corpses. spends her free time concocting poisons. constantly going on about how awesome it is to witness so much pain and suffering. claims its part of her job to team up with the cyclops who keeps trying to eat you. poisons you and is actively annoyed at the concept of you curing yourself. and despite it all shes still your close ally and friend

[codypunk]

we escalated from tagging to adopting a baby in one match

[sabriels]

me and that guy that i kind of get along with

[victusinveritas]

Comment on Facebook on a thread that is dumping on Corey Booker for being a Liberal rather than supporting Every Damn Cause the Farther Left Wants (most of which are good causes, but have trouble gaining traction politically). Can we not just ride the resistance train and not stop at every station to perform a purity test or we will NEVER prevail! Obviously he’s far from the best. But he did SOMETHING, which is better than most in power have done. It’s a start. We can praise these actions without putting him on a pedestal. When the opposition is destroying the country in record time, we cannot stop to make sure everyone that’s furthering the cause is a saint. As long as they’re contributing, they’re moving us forward.

-- This is the thing of it: Purity tests will always lead to more division. Yeah, Liberals suck, liberals suck, they're center right at best...but they're also who we have to work with until we can get effective Lefties in government. And we can't do that because we can't even agree on a candidate--not Bernie (great but just not listened to outside of Vermont--has basically achieved Old Man Yells at Cloud status), certainly not Jill Stein (a Russian asset clear as day who only pops up at election time as a Green/Libertarian spoiler supported by the Worst People you'll hang out with anyway because their beer is decent, they have a grill, and they hate Trump) and not AOC (inexperienced, yada yada). Once we get a Liberal/liberal majority, we can worry about slowly bending the arc of progress towards where we want it to point. In the meantime, if you're not out there doing things, all the talk online is just a fart in a windstorm--I'm sure you feel better having let it out, but it doesn't move shit. Every single fucking actually active in meatspace leftie I've talked to (and I've talked to a fuckload of them thanks to volunteering, showing up, doing what I can, really broadened the fuck out of my narrow, purity testing horizons) has said the same thing: we have to work with the Democrats and FUCKING vote. So many goddamn Instagram-Anarchists I saw before the election urging people not to vote for Kopmala have vanished post-election, and the ones that remain are going off the deep end (Nyx Erinyes on Facebook, for instance). Conclusion: either they were well-done Russian bots pushing folks to stay home or they were useful idiots. And a lot of the left fell for it hook, line, and sinker, and are still in that 'voting does nothing' mentality. Voting does nothing if you don't do it at all. Like, we might have to get behind a centrist candidate who can get something done, Gretchen Whitmer and Pete Buttigieg would do the numbers in a lot of places (probably not enough to win anything but at least they can fucking talk and get some of the people in the middle as well as the reasonably left, which was Kamala's problem aside from [all the other stuff, she should have been a non-starter, but she started, she failed, here we are with full fascism], etc. And don't get me started on Tankies (seriously, I've got a laundry list of issues with them, they're not as bad as Kissinger but they're not bloodless and most of them are under 25 so I kind of discount their opinions anyway: hell, I was a Trotskyist until 25, when I realized how awesome anarchism was, but small scale anarchy, communalism, that sorta shit, not big A Anarchy, which, again, has purity tests. But that's a different, longer, crazier rant. If you've read this far and haven't vomited from vertigo and jerkiness, I'm impressed. If you've read this far and want to argue, go ahead but I'll probably just shrug because (this includes my thoughts and opinions too) I honestly don't care what ya think, the internet is just wires, and unless you are in my community, your thoughts don't really carry that much water. Listening to: Toxicity by System of a Down

Reading: The Rigor of Angels by William Egginton and Toll the Hounds (Malazan Book of the Fallen Book 8) by Steven Erikson. Just finished: Diary of a Man in Despair by Friedrich Reck-Malleczewen and Victor Serge's later notebooks (NYRB edition).

[sunbentshadows]

I know it's an ice-cold take but it's so annoying to need to qualify "Women's" for every sport. Adding a standard qualifier in "Sports" (default category of media, derogatory) into "Men's Sports" akin to the way the Olympics do it would be great for the capacity to actually find and filter to women's sports.

[bradleysass]

oh my good-looking boy - @graverobbber - Soapbox - wc: 605

What would your Blorbo say to a younger version of themselves? (Additional: What would the younger version say to the older version?)

The room was quiet. Too quiet.

Dust motes floated in the golden haze of the afternoon sun slanting through the window, catching in James Potter’s lashes as he sat—slumped, older, tired in a way bones remembered more than breath. His hands, once calloused from holding a broom and clutching a wand too tightly, now trembled as they rested in his lap.

Then, the shift.

Not a sound, but a feeling—like déjà vu that curled warm around his spine.

When he looked up, he was there.

Or rather—he was here.

Fifteen. Maybe sixteen. Hair a perpetual mess, glasses too big for his face, that lopsided grin like he knew he was going to set the whole damn world on fire and laugh while it burned.

James—young James—stood in the doorway, blinking with those eyes that hadn’t yet seen war, hadn’t yet watched friends die, hadn’t yet held his son and sworn to live, only to die anyway.

“You look like hell,” young James said, a laugh bubbling up before he could stop it.

Old James smiled. “Yeah, well, I’ve had better years.”

“Is it… the future?” young James asked, stepping closer, voice barely above a whisper.

Something in Old James cracked. God, he wanted to tell the truth. To warn him. To scream that it wasn't fair. That being brave didn't save everyone. That sometimes, love wasn’t enough.

But instead, he leaned back and crossed his arms, feigning the swagger he’d long lost. “It’s bloody brilliant.”

Young James lit up. “Yeah?”

“Oh, yeah. We win. The war. The girl. Everything. Life turns out great.”

“That bad, huh?” young James squinted.

Old James chuckled softly, running a hand through thinning hair. “No. I mean it. We marry Lily. She says yes after years of telling us to piss off. We have a kid. A son. Harry. He’s got her eyes. Poor bloke’s got my hair though.”

Young James beamed, eyes lighting up like a sunrise. “No way.”

“Yes way. We’re a dad, mate. And a good one. Mostly. There’s this time we try to make pancakes and nearly burn the house down, but—he laughs. Just like we used to. Big, reckless laughs.”

“Do we… make it?” The question dropped like a stone in water.

Old James hesitated for half a second too long. “We make enough of it to matter.”

Young James frowned. “You’re lying.”

“Of course I am,” Old James said quietly. “But only a little.”

Silence stretched between them.

“Why lie?”

Old James leaned forward, elbows on knees, eyes searching the face that once belonged to him. “Because you don’t know yet how heavy it gets. You don’t know about losing people who were your whole world. You don’t know how fast a second can pass before you’d trade a lifetime just to get it back. But I do.”

Young James didn’t speak.

Old James smiled. Soft, weary. “But that smile of yours? That stupid, toothy grin? I’d lie every day just to see it again. Even if it’s only for a moment.”

Young James stared at him, eyes wide, and then—there it was.

The grin. Radiant. Untouched by time, by death, by the future.

Old James swallowed hard, chest aching, but smiling back through the pain.

“Whatever’s coming,” young James said, “we’ll face it, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Old James replied. “Like we always do.”

And just like that, the moment faded. The younger version vanished, leaving behind only the dust, the sunbeam, and the echo of laughter.

James Potter sat alone again. Broken, yes.

But for a brief moment, he’d remembered what it was like to be whole.

[mortal-ethos]

Idk when the switch happened that even professional psych and medical sites are saying sympathy is bad thing, but I just want to say here.

It's not a fucking bad thing. Empathy isn't inherently better than sympathy. Just because someone is empathetic rather than sympathetic to your plight, doesn't make it any better or worse. Doesn't make it less likely to cause a selfish response.

Idk when or who decided sympathy was "one's relief in not having the same problem as another," because that's not what it fucking means.

It means you understood the person's feelings, you understand why they're happening, and you feel concern for them.

Empathy means you actively feel the same emotions the other person is feeling from their issue, possibly from having a previous similar experience.

I've seen empathy over the last few years consistently lose its actual fucking meaning on social media, and to see sympathy be fucking completely disregarded and demonized when it is a PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE WAY TO FEEL when someone else is experiencing stress, boils my blood.

Sympathy does not mean you pity someone, it doesn't mean you look down on them, it doesn't mean you hold some position of power over them. Empathy does not mean you are automatically compassionate and kind and supportive and want to help.

People who are empathetic may be so to the extent that they want nothing to do with your problem because they feel it so strongly. And the way I continue to see these terms treated just makes me think that it's targeted against people that don't experience emotion the same way, aka people with mental illnesses or neurodivergent people.

Sympathy is not a bad thing to have. Empathy is not a bad thing to have. Apathy is not a bad thing to have. What matters is how you treat people, and your own feelings in regards to someone else's doesn't automatically spell out how you will react when someone needs support.

[viily]

im going to be st

I’m Going to be Straight Up i’ve been pondering the (scrunches face) (tilts head side to side) Ethics Of RealPersonFiction kind of thing a bit. not too well versed in the existing debate that may exist around it because if i’m honest there are just certain weakpoints of my self conscious and insecurities that can cause me to be paranoid if i expose myself to too much. but generally it is good to consider all points of an argument if i want to have firm convictions blah blah blah.

i suppose the polarizing nature also makes this hard. i do truly want to question why there is so much trouble surrounding it (i can certainly come up with obvious reason) i just want very serious civil socio-psychological perspectives about. why people engage with this. what elements of it can be harmful. similarities and differences between a fictional subject versus a Real Person one. what sort of moral compass comeuppance a person develops to either naturally be drawn to it or be opposed to it? i don’t know?…

i know this comes from my own deep personal curiosity and need to understand This Thing In Particular or else i will go crazy. because i spend a lot of time trying to map this out in my head. how long in recent history have people been engaging in what could be considered RealPersonFiction like at the fundamentals what is the separation between your closest-to-the-known-understanding of RPF that would be “real people and celebrities category on archiveofourown” versus “well if you think about a person (any person, who exists in real life) and you imagine them in a scenario that has not happened in reality is that RPF” just as a person who has to think about the foundations of Meanings Of Things And Why They Exist And Etcetera i get very confused on what it is about RealPersonFiction that seems so inherently incorrect.

It could have occurred to me after a long time of seeing people make posts about the general idea of being very afflicted by a fictional subject. im sure you could find these posts anywhere online where there is specific indication of a subject being fictional, then some kind of niche but outreaching relatable feeling that can be applied to subjects that comes to the minds of afflicted readers. “im always thinking about the Character” “i want the Character in [specific situation for the purpose of emotional catharsis and/or entertainment].” and so i think, yes, of course many people relate to this idea of being attached to a subject whom represents ideas and traits, whether they manifest bythe subject simply existing on their own and displayed via public appearance (a real person) or that these traits were put together by a real person(s) which are displayed through a created narrative of some kind, because these subjects are appealing to the people who would find them appealing. millions of examples really.

not everyone who is appealed by characters/people will be so afflicted by them that they feel compelled to commit time and focus to thinking about them, engaging with associated content about them, make art about them, etcetera. but anyone reading this post probably understands this concept of not only Liking Things but Being Significantly Compelled By An Individual. It does appear that there is some particular set of unspoken rules about how one publicly goes about expressing their affliction towards subjects (and anything in general really) and this will absolutely vary depending on the nature of the subjects and what media they might be associated with, you get the picture i guess. to be specific i guess you could say some fandoms have different kind of rules within the popular community of those who engage with it than others, you could probably make some personal connection. or not. if i’m honest i could say that depending on the fandom/community/demographic of people who like the thing or whatever, the rules/tolerance levels of participants can be tooootally mixed. there’s honestly so much variation in sociological structure to ehhh Fandom as a whole and then how very specific fandoms might be structured. god like way too many facets that could be covered, haha.

anyways, i’ve about lost track and well. I guess i want to understand more about what kind of rules people, from people who support, oppose, and are neutral about RPF, why they’ve come to their conclusions on how they engage with it, how they THINK others should engage with it, what specifically are the boundaries between RPF that is innocuous enough to be harmless (and may not even be considered RPF by most at first glance), to RPF that is more certifiably identifiable as Traditional RPF, whether or not all expressions of RPF content and ideas are harmful or not (which. i understand may be reductive to pose that question as, depending on your view, im to say there’s nuance personally), and like, i don’t know. what’s the big deal! essentially.

(gosh i so kind of forget to use words like a Real Person when making posts like these so please mind that i’m just kind of thinking out loud. but this is definitely open to any more discussion, if anyone happens to care >_< lol! thankyou…)

[ladyoftheharbour]

i don’t deny that a lot of men feel socially isolated but first of all that’s not a phenomenon that’s exclusive to men and secondly you lose me when you start suggesting that the solution is for women to be more sexually available to lonely men bc women are not rehabilitation centres for men who don’t know how to act around other people

[hitsuzenhusbands]

if i think about baby rusty for too long i get violently ill (as one does) but also college rusty...verge of escape. trying to earn back the autonomy his dad had stolen from him (see: most obviously how he was forced to wear shorts his whole life (infantilization + stunts self expression), but also his name being directly linked to and permanently associated with the show (and more marginally the sex act. in certain circles at least), etc. etc.) only to be sucked right back into it all. whatever

[geronimostiltonofficial]

i have thoughts on how kingdom come deliverance and by extension its fans engage w/sexuality as a historical construct but im also a pedant to the nth degree so im v close to doing academic research on medieval sexuality just to make sure my takes are 100% correct

[codypunk]

all dat room and they in there standing MEAT TO MEAT

[sabriels]

New riderquill in 2025 don't touch me im shaking

[secretcircuit]

i started T on friday the 13th on purpose :)