#Something better

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

hi!! I’m not sure if anyone’s asked this before but I’m rereading the first step of kintsugi and I was wondering what made Ben quit the force? was it just all the corruption that daredevil exposed or was it something more specific?

It was before Daredevil happened, but it was mostly that. Ben saw the corruption from the other side as it was being sown. It hadn’t been publicly exposed yet, but he wasn’t so blind he couldn’t see it, and the coworkers he had that were crooked didn’t exactly try hard to hide it. He saw the shady shit some of his coworkers did, and he saw how a lot of people pretended not to see it, and he saw that there wasn’t a fucking thing he could do about it. People who made a stink ended up fired and blacklisted or tragically dead, usually from shooting themselves four times in the head, funny how people manage that, and which it was depended on how loud they were and what they had to say. He realized that the only way to stay was to turn a blind eye himself, and he just couldn’t live with himself if he did that.

Fundamentally, Ben was a good man who realized that for all the power of his position, he couldn’t use it in a way that helped people, and so he left. It haunted him.

Ben’s position in the narrative of kintsugi is meant to be a bit of a foil to Peter’s. They each had what the other lacks, and Peter is so fucking sorry for that, if anyone out there would let him try to take it back. Ben is the ghost Peter chases but can never catch up to.

Ben had no power but a great sense of responsibility. He wanted desperately to have enough power to save people, chased it, and when he realized that it wasn’t a power he could use responsibly, he ended up with nothing. He was a good cop who couldn’t be a cop anymore and didn’t know how to be anything else. He died trying to do the right thing, and he died bitter and angry, because it’s hard to be a good man in a world suffocating on injustice and not be angry about it.

And then there’s Peter, who had all the power in the world. And the first thought he had was that he didn’t want it. He didn’t want it, because it came with responsibility. There wasn’t any kind of power in the world that wasn’t hitched to responsibility, and Peter just so desperately didn’t want to be the one to have to carry it. He was so tried already. Let it be someone else.

Peter had power, but Ben had a sense of responsibility, and Ben Parker was the one who ran towards the alley that killed him. And Peter doesn’t want to forgive himself for that. He wants the guilt to drown him.

[faelapis]

Something Better chapter 33 - "Be Your Own Diamond" - is out NOW!

Something Better is my Jasper-centric Steven Universe fanfic about her searching for meaning in life without a Diamond. Set after SU Future. You can read it at the link above.

[momentsbeforemass]

Not yet

I hate waiting.

I know patience is a virtue. It’s just not my virtue.

When things aren’t happening the way I think they should, or they’re not happening when I think they should, the odds are good that I will do…something.

Because I hate waiting.

The thing is, sometimes waiting is exactly what God is calling us to do.

We all know the line about how God always answers prayers, but sometimes the answer is “no.” That’s right, as far as it goes. But there’s another answer.

Sometimes the answer is “not yet.” That’s the one that I struggle with.

I do better with a flat “no.” At least I know where I stand. 

When it comes to “not yet,” my first instinct is - I want to know when. I want to know how. I need details.

God almost always has other ideas.

Because “not yet” isn’t a pointless hurry up and wait. Or the sign of a disorganized deity who needs to get His stuff together.

Whatever other reason there may be for the delay, God’s “not yet” is a practical antidote to the pride that a lack of patience smuggles into our lives. The vanity that gives itself away when I insist on knowing when and how, when I demand details from God.

It’s why Jesus says in today’s Gospel, “no slave is greater than his master nor any messenger greater than the one who sent him.”

Which means that if God’s giving us a “not yet,” we’ve got a choice. We can go with that first instinct. Demand details from God. Maybe even do it ourselves (and end up with all kinds of things we never wanted).

And give away the truth. That whoever you and I think we’re trusting, we’re really relying on some of the least dependable people we know. Us.

After all, how many times have you and I been wrong before?

Or we can trust God. Even when the answer is “not yet.”

Resting in the knowledge that whatever we think “has to happen,” the God who has always loved us has something better in store for us than we could ever ask or imagine.

Today’s Readings

[mrkmciver]

#Divine Reroute

[balthazar-sketti]

Marianne Faithfull "Something Better"

The Rolling Stones Rock and Roll Circus

December, 1968

Dir. Michael Lindsay Hogg

[ometochtli2rabbit]

[whaleiumsharkspeare]

*manifests the zoo getting back to me about a job by dramatically singing “Something Better” from Muppet Treasure Island while stocking shelves at my current job*

[faithfulsheepdog]

God and a tea bag.

I've been drinking a lot more hot tea lately. I've hardly touched the stuff before a week ago, but I've been incorporating it more into my routine because, not only is it good and good for you, but God has taught me something about how He works in people using the tea.

Tea bags, as we know, have a lot of flavor and nutrients and all sorts of good things tucked inside, ready to be used to make some yummy tea. And we all know how tea is made with a tea bag, right? The water needs to be prepped and heated, and then you let the tea bag seep in the water. The tea bag does all the work, I just have to let it do its thing, and I'm going to end up with some delicious tea. The longer the tea bag seeps in there, the stronger the flavor will become, and there is nothing I can do to turn the newly made tea back to water.

Isn't that exactly what God does with us?

See, the water is us, it’s our hearts.  The water is our hearts without God. We have no flavor, we have no spiritual life. But we don’t have to be like that.

The Holy Spirit starts the work in us by prepping our hearts and minds into helping us see the truth about God and ourselves. He helps us make sure we're ready to receive what God has for us: His love, salvation, grace, forgiveness, all the good promises He's made, eternal life, etc. Then once we're ready to take that step towards God, all we have to do is invite Jesus into our hearts and change us, and He does all the work to make that happen.

Just like that, Jesus makes us brand new! He makes us better than we were. I mean, you think you're great now? Jesus can make you better.

Once Jesus saves us with His love, we will always be saved with His love. We will never be the people we were before Jesus, we will always have Jesus with us, and honestly?  That’s literally the best thing ever!

And the more we stick with Jesus and we study the Bible and we pray and we let Him work in us? The stronger our faith becomes, the stronger our Christian flavor becomes.

We become the living, breathing example of 2 Corinthians 5:17, "If anyone belongs to Christ, then he is made new. The old things have gone; everything is made new!" (ICB)

And...that's the tea.

[buckaroo627]

Oliver Stark Instagram Story: No. I have something better

"THEM: 'SAY THIS BEE PICK UP LINE'

ME: 'NO., BUT I HAVE SOMETHING BETTER'"

🐝🐝🐝

[fieriframes]

[BUT BABY, MISSED ME IN THE ALLEY, BABY, DON'T YOU FRET, BUT COME BACK AROUND AND DON'T FORGET, WHEN YOU'RE TIRED AND YOU'RE HUNGRY AND YOU WANT SOMETHING COOL, BUT GOT SOMETHING BETTER THAN A SWIMMING POOL AT A LITTLE DIVE CALLED CASINO EL CAMINO.]

[sincerelybubbles]

guys and what if i changed my tumblr user. and what then?

[sadghostgirl14]

[faelapis]

How's the progress for "Something Better" coming along lately?

not amazing. it's one of those things where it feels like my life is too chaotic right now to really concentrate on it. i'm also pretty sure i have adhd, and it's been wrecking me more than usual lately, but the path of getting a diagnosis and meds is long and annoying. so i'm struggling to really sit down and focus.

[momentsbeforemass]

Concrete

What’s your greatest obstacle to faith?

What gets between you and God?

It’s a classic question for spiritual direction. For pastoral care. And for next-level confessions (the kind you make an appointment for).

The first time it gets dropped on you, it’s tempting to answer with things like a sin that you’re struggling with. The way that certain things set you off. Or a habit that’s working against you.

And while there’s no doubt that those things can definitely get between us and God, they’re usually not the whole story. That is, things like that are usually symptoms, caused by something else.

If we ever want to get past them, we’ve got to look at what’s causing them.

So, what is the something else?

For a lot of us (myself included), the something else is our ideas about how things are going to work.

I don’t mean our hopes and dreams. “I’ve always wanted to” and “wouldn’t it be great if” by themselves aren’t the problem.

The problem comes with our plans. Not in having plans, but the way we plan. When we map it all out. When we decide – not just where we want to go – but what the steps are to get there. Exactly how those steps are going to go. When we figure it all out. In detail.

And then pour concrete around it.

The thing is, we almost never consciously do this. But it’s like there’s something in us that says – “I’ve used up all this creativity and emotional energy to figure all this out, and I just don’t see how it can happen any other way. So it can’t.”

Once we’re locked into THE way that it has to happen, we have no time, no room, no patience for anything that doesn’t track. Anything else is (at best) a distraction. Or worse, sabotage.

That some other way might also work (much less yield a better result) doesn’t even occur to us.

This is precisely what Jesus is dealing with in today’s Gospel.

People who have figured out how it’s going to go. Who have decided what God will do, how God will do it. And who’ve poured concrete around it.

The thing is, when you and I do this? Just like them, we set ourselves up to be frustrated. To be disappointed. To miss out on God’s best for our lives.

Because God doesn’t always do things our way. God doesn’t always follow our plans, the ones we poured concrete around.

But there’s something about us that gets bent out of shape when God doesn’t do things our way. Which is why – every time we feel this way – we need to ask ourselves,

What if God does it different?

              Can I accept that God knows things that I don’t?

What if God doesn’t do it on my schedule?

              Can I accept that God’s timing is perfect?

What if God gives me something different, something better than I asked for?

(totally a God move, BTW)

              Can I accept that God knows me better than I do?

If this is something you struggle with (like I do), then these are not easy questions to wrestle with. But they’re worth the effort.

Because it’s the only way I know to escape the pride that pouring concrete around ideas will smuggle into your life.

The pride that’s one of the surest ways to close yourself off from God. And God’s best.

Today’s Readings

[deadmegumi]

Not to be a problematic age gap advocate but the show truly lost so much in making jaime and brienne around the same age

[aijamisespava]

Eurovision Thoughts

Welcome back to Eurovision Thoughts. The part of the blog where I mention a random thing in Eurovision that I've been thinking about.

This week (and rather appropriately after discussing a 2014 entry), I want to discuss something I noticed about Finland's 2014 entry on streaming.

So, my favorite Finnish entry is 2014's "Something Better" by Softengine. And of course it's on my Spotify playlist (and in a WIP), and one day while I was listening to my music, it came up...and it sounded different.

The cover looked different (it was the UMK cover as opposed to their album cover), and it sounded different...but BETTER? I like this new version and wanted to share my thoughts about it. If they sent what looks to be the UMK version, I still would have liked it all the same! :)

That's all for today's Eurovision Thought!