and dean winchester thought he was unlovable and didnt deserve happiness he hated himself and thought eveyone would eventually leave him and then a literal fucking angel fell in love with him. like loved him more than anything else in the world.
gaten saying dustin wouldn't pick between eddie and steve bc they both mean so much to him in different ways while also saying he doesn't understand the need to separate them since steve and eddie get along well and he thought that eddie and dustin would convince steve to join in a DnD campaign with them since it would be "his dream" while also saying that dustin likes that eddie is unashamedly himself and he thinks that steve likes it too and i. i need a moment
Sometimes I think about Urianger's role in and feelings on the Thancred-Ryne dynamic and I think watching it kills him a bit inside. For several reasons.
Like, to begin with there's the guilt he's been carrying with him since he ushered Minfilia to the first, how he effectively killed the person Thancred cared about the most in the world and who's "death" ended up causing Ryne's entire Situation. He looks at what's happening between them and can only think "I caused this" even though that's not really true. No one person is responsible for this outcome, it's a culmination of several circumstances and the consequences of them. Logically, Urianger knows this. But it doesn't matter, because his guilt is overpowering his logic.
And also, like. What Thancred is doing here, the way he's knowingly letting Ryne be and stay hurt because he literally cannot bring himself to tell her his feelings, is the exact same mistake Urianger made with Moenbryda. Of course, the circumstances are vastly different, and the potential consequences to Thancred telling Ryne the wrong things or her misinterperating it is far greater (being a matter of literal life or death), it's still the same sort of paralysis they are trapped in.
And he knows it. He sees it. But he can't say or do anything about it, he doesn't have the right to. He acknowledges the mistake, but he hasn't really improved upon it yet. He still doesn't voice his thoughts and feelings as he should. He's also non-confrontational by nature, he doesn't argue or try to change peoples minds, he probably doesn't think he has any place to.
So, he tries to help in what little ways he can. Because he doesn't want it to become Monebryda again, he doesn't want to know he stole not one but two people from Thancred. So he does what he can. He tells Ryne little tidbits about Thancred, things that help her understand him but are safe to share. Nothing too deep, nothing too personal. Just small things, things that are purely factual, because he can't afford to give her a false image of who Thancred is. He teacher her fun and interesting things, because Thancred isn't in the mindset to provide her with non-essential skills.
I like to think Urianger has brought it up with Thancred at least once, during one of his stays. But nothing would've come of it. Not really. Unlike Y'shtola, Urianger isn't pushy, he'll bring it up once or twice and when he sees this won't go anywhere, he gives up. He wants to help, but he knows that persistance only does do much, and he is not the person who has the resiliance needed to push and push until Thancred finally budges (because he won't budge, it won't help anything but to sour things further by adding aditional stress to an already strained dynamic).
And like. Urianger gets it. He gets it because he's been the same way- not saying what he should to someone he loves more than anything else because she was meant to figure her life out herself, and 'steering' her in any direction by telling her his feelings (regardless of if the 'steering' is intention or not) will go against that. He gets it. He gets it and it's all the more painful for it. He knows it can't just be fixed by acknowledging it or with encouragement, something needs to happen to break the stasis.
I think this is probably why he stayed behind while they went off to Nabaath Areng. This is the very last chance they have to say what they want to, and he can't afford to be the anchor anymore. This is about them, not him, he can't let their resolution be buffed by his presence, so he stays behind. Which was probably for the best. Ryne got nervous when Urianger said he's staying behind, probably not too excited about being alone with Thancred (well, not alone, but WoL doesn't count) so soon after she had ran away crying. But she needs to be nervous. For anything positive to come out of this Thancred and Ryne both can't afford to be too relaxed. As sad as it is, the stress is necessary for anything to happen. He knows it. Does he like it? Absolutely not, but nor does he like his other plots. At least no one dies this time if it goes right.
I'm seeing a lot of "Kaeya doesn't care for Khaenri'ah" for a while now in various socmed but like... this is the same dude that:
1. kept a portion of his father's notes about his clan when it was supposed to be burned
2. tested out the waters with Venti/Barbatos by putting a threat/warning in a letter
3. technically tried to run away from Dawn Winery to be able to go to Sumeru to learn more about Khaenri'ah when he was a kid
4. has his play performance imply that he is annoyed/mad about his birth father's actions BUT would like to keep both enemy and home nations safe and at peace
5. Avoids elaborating on Khaenri'ah but unafraid to say that that is his ancestry (in fact, he uses it to his benefit)
6. chose to keep using "Alberich" as a surname (he had his chances to change it, and no one could call him out, and yet he kept it? Again, what for?)
7. is torn with the idea of duty to his home nation and the love that Mond gave to him (character stories)
tbh I think Kaeya still cares for Khaenri'ah (whether it is because of his father's orders, or his own heart yearning for what could have been, or that he simply and genuinely loves his heritage). We still have Mona's voiceline saying that he has to make a choice someday, so clearly something is eating up his mind.
What I do theorize Kaeya is trying to do is to look for a different solution where he doesn't have to choose between Khaenri'ah and Mondstadt. That's what his Veluriyam Mirage vision is for- a mixture of the star of Khaenri'ah and the vision case of Mondstadt. In a realm where your dreams could be a reality, he decided to give himself both.
And honestly, could he possibly have both someday? Or does he need to realize that he can only have one?