#a return to prehistoric times

[sadsongsandwaltzes]

Now I know dirt turns to gold

I washed it off but it stayed down in my soul

[shironezuninja]

I haven’t forgotten my promise to check out Vox Machine when I finished up Shaman King 2021. I’ve just got mixed feeling about not knowing exactly HOW 18+ the series might turn out to be.

[ozzgin]

Can I request a headcanon where baki has a very cute s/o and pickle just so happens to escape the arena and runs into the cute s/o and everyone scared they'll be eaten pickle is nice and cute with the s/o and the scientists says they're looking at eachother like how kids look at puppies and s/o teaches pickle tricks making yujiro mad he's no longer fighting

Let’s just hope Pickle doesn’t experience cute aggression and has the urge to bite into your face or something.

Baki Headcanons: Pickle meets Baki’s significant other

Featuring Pickle, Baki and his cute partner that builds a strange relationship with the Jurassic man.

[Baki Masterlist] [Part II]

You’re dangling your legs back and forth over the wooden bench that faces away from the large arena building. The nerve of Baki to postpone your date night! You pout to yourself, mildly annoyed that whatever currently stands in the underground ring is more important than you. Who on Earth could it be this time? Baki has already fought most of the big shots.

You don’t have the time to think too hard about it as your seat topples over and you roll on the grass, wildly confused. You quickly lift yourself up and look around, trying to figure out what the hell just happened. At the same time, Pickle scans the area for the obstacle that caused him to trip this badly. He spots the bench, now torn from its bolts, and his gaze then stops on you. Another human. Somehow, this one reminds him of a small animal, like the kind of wild pup he’d chase around when he was younger.

You can now hear the multiple footsteps approaching your location and glance over. There’s a couple of armed men, old man Tokugawa, and behind them Baki is panting in panic. “(Y/N), get the hell back! Fuck, I won’t make it in time” he grunts to himself. Aha! You return to Pickle. So this was the irresistible opponent that had you wait alone next to a parking lot. “The homewrecker!” you exclaim, amused. The large prehistoric man doesn’t register your words but seems to be pleased with your smile.

He lowers himself to your level and inspects your scent. You find his wide, curious eyes and puzzled expression rather cute. Without much consideration you extend your hand and ruffle his hair. Baki gasps at your unhinged act and is about to shove his way through before Tokugawa gently stops him. “I don’t think you need to worry”, he whispers with a finger against his lips. And, true to his word, Pickle is now kneeling before you with a wide grin. One can almost notice a wagging tail behind his giant frame.

Well, you’re certainly cheaper than tranquilizer guns. The research team can’t complain as long as you get Pickle to behave. Baki, on the other hand, isn’t as excited about having his s/o giggling around with a Jurassic man at least twice the size. Now it’s his turn to pout, sitting against the fence and occasionally barking at Pickle that you’re his mate in case he gets funny ideas.

Though the one most annoyed by the situation is probably Yuujirou. He feels like he just got robbed and left empty handed on the side of the highway. No matter how often he parades the ring with a puffed up chest, Pickle seems to be more entranced by your shitty games. Honestly, he’d just get rid of you, but fighting an enraged Pickle and Baki simultaneously could be a stretch even for the Ogre himself.

[theworkshopmann]

Frankie!

In prehistoric times, packs of Dachshunds roamed the Plains of Boston, hunting the now-extinct Giant Ground Whale. Protect yourself against the inevitable return of the Giant Ground Whale and adopt a Wiener Dog today.

Type: Cosmetic/misc

Class: Scout

Paintable: Yes

Accepted in game: No

This cosmetic was made by Steam users Sparkwire and Greg. Posted on April 17th 2018, you can vote for this here!

[jolynejay]

Remember the theory on how ScaVio might potentially have impact on Legends Arceus and how the mainline series treats time travel? Yeah, scratch that in large parts.

BECAUSE THERE IS NO TIME MACHINE IN SCARLET AND VIOLET

The mysterious pokemon described in the Scarlet Book/ Violet Book... it makes "imagination" a "reality." The weird pokemon sketched in the book, the photos of the approximated paradox pokemon - they are all built on the imagination of the expedition team Heath was in. They are a reflection of what these people expected to find in the depths of the Paldean Crater. The Legendary Pokemon on the hexagonal layers is likely building not just pokemon but items, technology out of the Tera Crystals based on what the people in its vicinity imagine.

The team envisioned to find strange creatures. Fusions of legendary pokemon of Johto's legendary dogs, or Unova's Swords of Justice. In Scarlet, the expectation seems to have been to find prehistoric pokemon - preserved in the crator without human interference. In Violet, the expectation may have been shaped by the evolution of mankind and its technology - to find traces of a civilization far more advanced than our own with pokemon evolved to fit that image.

And the artist accompanying the expedition even skeched out some of the pokemon they thought they saw or dreamed up in a haze. And THOSE SKETCHES are what would later shape the imagination of the people entering the crator. The very documentation of the Area Zero shaped how humans would continue to perceive it. And it shaped Sada's and Turo's image of what the far past or the far future might look like. An "image" that would become "reality." (Even Arven mentions how farfetched the Books descriptions sound, and how his parents seemed to have basically made this fairytale real)

I cannot yet tell why the Crystalline Legendary mentioned in those books would do that, though. Maybe it was originally a defense mechanism that was supposed to keep stuff away. Let people and pokemon imagine their fears in order to protect itself. Something that failed over time as mankind advances in technology and science, so it switched strategies to keep itself save.

Maybe the Legendary is trying to lure people/pokemon/whatever to themself - like an anglerfish dangling light in the dark ocean depths, a promise of treasure greater than your wildest dreams.

Whatever the reason is, what we know for certain is that it worked on Sada/Turo.

And the legendary pokemon began more and more to shape and create from the specific reasearch the professors conducted.

In the end, the "time machine" they built is no time machine. It is a machine that makes imagination "reality" (possibly powered by the legendary pokemon in some capacity). Maybe the machine even got constructed by the crystal pokemon bc hallelujah how do you get that much construction done in a literal Made in Abyss eldritch mystery crater without all the world knowing what you are doing. Or heck maybe the machine did somehow get constructed, but it worked more like an amplifier for the Legendary Pokemon's powers.

Either way, it explains why people would not be able to "return" from the "future/past". because the future/past as Turo/Sada imagined it does not exist.

That also explains why the AI Professor crystallizes in the final fight - they are a crystalline construction of imagination. They are Sada/Turo's ideal work partner - a copy of themselves. Something that knows exactly how the Professor thinks and acts. And when the protag squad tries to shut down the machine the illusion begins to fall apart.

It also means the Tera Crystal constructions like the doppelgangers, Miraidon/Koraidon, and all the other paradox pokemon can gain actual awareness, emotion, and sentience.

They are all the Professors' "Paradise" because that is how they imagined the prehistoric past/ far future to be:

Wilderness untamed and existence optimized.

[hungwy]

A small woman—or perhaps an adolescent boy—walks quickly across a landscape where giant beasts roam. The person holds a toddler on their hip, and their feet slip in the mud as they hurry along for nearly a mile, perhaps delivering the child to a safe destination before returning home alone.

Despite the fact that this journey took place more than 10,000 years ago, a new paper published in the journal Quaternary Science Reviews manages to sketch out what it might have looked and felt like in remarkable detail.

Evidence of the journey comes from fossilized footprints and other evidence discovered in New Mexico’s White Sands National Park in 2018, reports Albuquerque TV station KRQE. Toward the end of the late Pleistocene epoch—between 11,550 and 13,000 years ago—humans and animals left hundreds of thousands of tracks in the mud along the shore of what was once Lake Otero.

The new paper investigates one specific set of tracks, noting details in the footprints’ shapes that reveal how the traveler’s weight shifted as they moved the child from one hip to the other.

“We can see the evidence of the carry in the shape of the tracks,” write study co-authors Matthew Robert Bennett and Sally Christine Reynolds, both of Bournemouth University in England, for the Conversation. “They are broader due to the load, more varied in morphology often with a characteristic ‘banana shape’–something that is caused by outward rotation of the foot.”

At some points along the journey, the toddler’s footprints appear as well, most likely because the walker set the child down to rest or adjust their position. For most of the trip, the older caretaker carried the child at a speed of around 3.8 miles per hour—an impressive pace considering the muddy conditions.

“Each track tells a story: a slip here, a stretch there to avoid a puddle,” explain Bennett and Reynolds. “The ground was wet and slick with mud and they were walking at speed, which would have been exhausting.”

On the return trip, the adult or adolescent followed the same course in reverse, this time without the child. The researchers theorize that this reflects a social network in which the person knew that they were carrying the child to a safe destination.

“Was the child sick?” they ask. “Or was it being returned to its mother? Did a rainstorm quickly come in catching a mother and child off guard? We have no way of knowing and it is easy to give way to speculation for which we have little evidence.”

The fossilized footprints show that at least two large animals crossed the human tracks between the outbound and return trips. Prints left by a sloth suggest the animal was aware of the humans who had passed the same way before it. As the sloth approached the trackway, it reared up on its hind legs to sniff for danger before moving forward. A mammoth who also walked across the tracks, meanwhile, shows no sign of having noticed the humans’ presence.

Another article: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0277379120305722

[tokimaeki]

professor layton spoilers

-

thinking about how every professor layton game is ultimately about love. a prehistoric creature sacrificing itself so that a little girl can live. a man who never stopped searching, went through with a fake marriage, registered everything he had in his brother's name, just so that brother might have a place to return to one day. a girl who denied her purpose, who pled with her creators to save the world she fell in love with, who hoped while dying that she would be reborn as a human. a man who built a city of robots so that his daughter wouldn't feel so alone. a woman who braved a hallucinogenic gas leak just to tell her grandfather that his long-lost fiancée never stopped loving him. a woman frozen in time, neither dead or alive, kissing her lover one last time. a boy who loved his brother so much, he gave up his name just so his brother could have a family. so many stories, all of them ultimately driven by the same thought: "I love you, I love you, I love you."

[plazmataz]

i learned some proto indo european so i could tell the Legend of Zelda to my neolithic great(×400)-grandparents:

*mn̥tímis drúmis-kʷe ph₂ḱróm kukróm h₃réǵmn̥ gʰérdʰro. tér h₂ugism̥óm widism̥óm h₂owsóm sh₂émn̥t, kʷód h₁ih₂ǵnóy dʰǵʰémi skéuHto. pérwr̥ tósmey kuki-h₃r̥ǵméni désntro. pélh₁ewes h₂néres h₁ih₂ǵnóey dʰǵʰméy sérh₃n̥t, néḱro-kʷe. h₁ey tósmeod nésn̥t né, de h₂litrós h₂élutōr pr̥wéns sréwt. h₃rḗǵs septḿ̥ skówhims sontéyet, nu h₁ih₂ǵnósyo dʰǵʰmés pérwr̥ h₂érkn̥t. n̥dʰgʷʰitóm h₂órkmom, wélh₁pn̥t. de íh₂ dʰéh₁teyes sh₂m̥néy h₂yúmis h₁wéh₂ro. nu ǵʰéwHtōr, h₂égʷʰnim, kuki-h₃r̥ǵméni prépt; so h₂órkmom h₁ripyéh₁to. h₃réǵm̥ gʷolHéyet, h₃réǵs kérn̥s dʰréwgʰt. septḿ̥ skówhis h₂yéwHonm̥s ǵónh₁oms spn̥desḱét. nu h₃réǵs dʰugh₂tḗr séldh₂ h₁éso wiktóm déh₂itim dʰégʷʰh₂to…

(literally) 'with Mountains And with Trees a Fair High Realm was Girded. There of an August-most Wise-most Aurum they Hymned, Which in a Holy Land was Hid. a Portal to There in High-Rule was Discovered. Aplenty People into the Holy Land Fought, And were Vanished. They from There Returned Not, But Loathsome Power from the Portal Streamed. the Ruler Seven Sages Sent, and the Holy Land’s Portal they Sealed. an Eternal Seal, they Willed. But These Deeds to Hymns by Ages were Waned. Now a Priest, Agahnim, in Hyrule Appeared; He the Seal Sought Riven. the Ruler he Quelled, the Ruler’s Heralds he Deceived. the Seven Sages’ Juvenile Progeny, one by one, he Sacrificed. Now the Royal Daughter Zelda’s Own Victim Time Approached…'

the italicized words are where i was able use a direct reflex in english of the corresponding prehistoric word above, which means these words still mean the same thing after all this time.

just a little link to the past for you today!

[pianocat939]

Yandere bees

No context, just- yandere bees

NAHHH I WAS WAITING FOR THIS.

I did some research and turns out prehistoric bees aren't gigantic, but we'll go with cat-sized bubblebees.

Tw: some religious themes at the end, MC basically gets captured, involuntarily role

Alright so let's say MC is a scientist. This is obviously not current time because MC manages to use time travel to retrieve an ancient bee species for research.

With their team members, they receive a female and a male to observe (taking an entire hive would be too dangerous). Unlike modern-day bees, they don't have stingers but have been shown to use their retractable claws as their defence instead.

While the other team members do more biological research on their internal workings, MC is the one to observe behaviour. The two bees are very young, just barely reached adult age. MC feeds them, coddles them if they get too cold, and tries to measure their intelligence through certain exercises.

Well over time, the bees start to show some behaviour change. They aren't necessarily hostile to the other team members, but anyone could easily tell they like MC more. They make little buzzes and chirps to get MC's attention, lifting their front arms to show they want to be coddled.

Sometimes they try to get out of their habitat to follow MC home.

After about a year with the bees, the whole team goes to take them home. But then the machine malfunctions, and takes the team in a different era compared to MC and the bees.

So MC is stuck to take the bees home alone before returning to the lab. They get close enough to the hive that they can spot it from a distance before trying to get them to fly.

So the bees do. They go back into their hive but immediately start telling their family and friends how this strange creature took care of them and fed them while they were separated. Practically preaching to everybody how wonderful you are.

Just as MC is about to enter the time machine, it gets busted up by a swarm of bees, whilst the original 2 they had captured climb onto them, trying to find a warm spot.

MC is horrified, as they can't go back home. They are taken to the hive and forced to become some revered person of the bees.

(You can take this in whatever you want, I just implied this as platonic since I couldn't really figure out how romancing a bee would go...Which is odd for me considering I can make anything romantic yan)

[bagdaddyb]

A Prehistoric Halloween

Summary: Your first Halloween with Wanda and the twins.

Pairing: fem!Reader x milf!Wanda

Warnings: Fluffy fluff fluff.

AN: I love love love love LOVE milf Wanda. Can't wait to write more of her.

You stood by the front door with a large smile on your face. You were dressed up as a dinosaur standing at your girlfriends front door handing out candy. It was silly, but the twins begged you and you could never say no to them. You loved this holiday, it always excited you to see the new and classic costumes every year. But what made this year so special was it was your first Halloween with Wanda, not only your first Halloween but first big holiday all together. You'd been dating the red head eight months in the twins life for six and you were living on a cloud. Your life felt so perfect you often found yourself toxically waiting on the pen to drop on reality to hit. You're sure you could only blame past relationships for that mindset so you often pushed it to the back of your mind, choosing to enjoy the here and now. You handed out candy to the next set of children as you waited for your own family to get prepared in their costumes. Your mind raced with thoughts of Wanda and the twins. You were serious about this. With all of them. You wanted to wake up next to Wanda every morning, walk the twins to school, help them with their homework when they got home. You wanted to get a family cat or two, have barbecues in the summer and make smores in the winter. You wanted to make memories take family photos you wanted them. The smile couldn't be wiped off your face as the hopeful thoughts of your future raged on. Only snapping out of it once the door behind you opened. Tommy and Billy stepped out dressed as small dinosaurs, your matching costumes largely their idea that you were eager to take part of.

"(Y/N)! (Y/N)!"

They screamed simultaneously overly excited by all the commotion of today.

"Look look! We're a family of dinosaurs."

Your heart melted at the term. Happy tears threatening to fall.

"We look awesome. Let me hear your best roar."

The boys both roar at you loudly causing laughter to trickle out of you.

"That's very convincing I hope we don't scare anyone too badly."

"Well don’t you three look scary."

Wanda says with a light tone as she makes her way out of the door. She is dressed as a dinosaur as well but in a much more comfortable outfit a rather sexy take on a pterodactyl and you can't help the way your eyes wonder.

"Well are you two ready? We can probably hit the next two blocks before it gets too dark out."

You say as you place the bowl of candy on the porch for kids to grab. The two boys cheer in response waddling away with you and Wanda close behind them.

"Thank you for this, the boys haven't been able to stop talking about this all week."

"Of course believe it or not I may have been just as excited. This costume is actually pretty cool."

Wanda smiles softly intertwining her fingers with yours as you walk the crowded sidewalk of her neighborhood going door to door with the twins. As the sun sets and the night begins to chill you make the decision its time to wrap it up.

"Alright boys two more houses then we should head back. It's getting cold, and if we're going to watch the Nightmare before Christmas we need to start it soon."

The two dinosaur heads that nod at you in response before scurrying off causes you to laugh. Wanda's eyes have been sparkling at you all night. This halloween has been perfect. The twins haven't even asked about their father who bailed on them again even once. Upon returning to Wanda's you quickly get a few pictures with the twins and Wanda before stripping out of the costume letting out a sigh of relief.

"It was fun at first but after a while it started to get stuffy."

Wanda smiles at you knowingly helping you stash away your costume as the boys run off to change eager to return for hot chocolate and the movie.

"Tonight was perfect."

Wanda whispers to you and you wrap her in your arms covering her face in kisses. Light giggles leave Wanda as her arms wrap around your neck keeping you close.

"I'm glad I could make it so. I.... I love you and the boys Wanda. Here's to many more perfect halloweens."

You say as you lean in and kiss the red headed woman. Wanda can't wipe the wide smile off her face. It was the first time you'd told her you loved her. While she'd heard it and many other things in your in your thoughts many times she never spoke on it, wanting you to do it in your own time.

"Mom stop kissing (Y/N) I wanna watch our movie."

Tommy says causing a giggle from Wanda against your lips. You smile and let go of her moving to Tommy and scooping him up easily.

"You're just jelous you don't get any kisses."

You say sprinkling kisses all over the boys face causing giggles to screech out of him. Billy soon rounds the corner and gets the same treatment quickly scooped up by you before you carry them both to the kitchen for hot chocolate. As you settle in for the movie Wanda cuddled into your side. Billy in your lap, Tommy at Wanda's side you can't think of anything better than this moment. This was your family, you were home.

[historical-fashion-polls]

another follower celebration?

hello my loves! 💕

I come to you with both good and bad news today

bad news first: we have just over 10 flower children polls left, at which time they shall all return to the gardens and fields from whence they came to continue bringing joy and whimsy to all those they meet

good news: in the meantime, we have hit 2k (!!!! 🤯🤯) and I would love to do another celebration for you all to say thank you!!

my plan is as follows: I've had a number of requests to do earlier fashion periods, and for a lot of reasons, I have limited myself to primarily commercial fashion plates/fashion illustrations (more on that here) and thus the images that I personally source for the blog don't go much further back than the mid-1700s (more on that here). HOWEVER, for our 2k celebration, I will be temporarily lifting some of those restrictions and expanding the time period of the blog!! 🥰🥰

two caveats:

sourcing these types of images takes more time and effort, so I will not be able to keep this up indefinitely (esp since I'm starting my phd program in the fall), but as I get things sorted for the celebration I'll let y'all know how long I'll be personally sourcing images from a more expansive time period and a broader range of sources

you are always welcome to submit images from earlier periods!! I just have to be realistic about what I can personally do in terms of research and sourcing for the blog, but if you have older images you want to see featured, you can send them in at any time!! (all info on submitting images can be found in my pinned post! ☺️)

but now onto what I'm best at: a poll!! I'd like to know what you all would most like to see and what areas I should focus on, so if you have thoughts, please vote in the poll below and let me know! also, some of these responses are vast ranges of time, so if you have a specific year/decade/century within one of the options, please do let me know via tags, comments, asks, etc. 🥰 also I cannot promise that I will be able to find usable images for all of these periods – I mostly want to gauge interest before I go looking for potential images to use ☺️

and yes I did use art historical classifications, please don't judge me it's what makes most sense to my brain 😅🫣

if there is a lot of interest in a specific time period, I'll likely run some more specific polls to narrow in on some key moments of interest, but please do let me know any specific things you might like to see! ☺️

[louthestarspeaker]

[ID: A collection of six images of Jurassic World: Chaos Theory promo material. The images are in the style of a magazine, with a cover and interviews from each of the Nublar Six, minus Brooklynn.

The cover has all of the Nublar Six lined up on the docks in Costa Rica, just after they made it back to the mainland. Yaz and Sammy are holding hands, Kenji has a hand on Brooklynn's shoulder. All the kids are smiling nicely, with the exception of Darius whose smile is kind of awkward and looks a little uncomfortable on camera. The title of the magazine, The Dino Times, is splashed across the top of the page. Just below it is the subtitle "Who are the Nublar Six?". Below the photo of the campers is text that reads, "Meet the miraculous survivors of the Jurassic World catastrophe in this exclusive, celebrating the anniversary of their return."

Each of the interviews has a picture of each of the Nublar Six as a young adult, their name printed large, and a little logo for The Dino Times in the corner. A transcript of the text of each interview reads as folllows:

Darius: Dino Nerd Turned Hero

Darius Bowman never would've expected a shy, nerdy kid from Oakland could become the leader of the Nublar survivors.

"Back at Camp Cretaceous I had to learn to trust myself and my friends to make it through. It was a terrifying experience, but what they were doing to those dinosaurs at that facility just wasn't right. Somebody had to do something."

Since his return, Bowman has traveled all over the country giving talks about dinosaur conservation, and has worked with the Department of Prehistoric Wildlife.

Ben: Brave Soul Against All Odds

Ben Pincus had perhaps the most dramatic metamorphosis as a result of his experiences at Nublar.

"I was terrified of pretty much everything," he said. "Germs. The dark. Non-organic snacks. And then all of a sudden we were up against actual dinosaurs."

Luckily, Pincus found an unlikely ally in a baby Ankylosaurus he named Bumpy.

"Bumpy is my best friend. She helped me face my fears and see how much I had to contribute to the group."

We'll have to see if the campus office can make an exception for Bumpy as Ben gets ready for college in the fall.

Sammy: Cattle Rancher, Dino Wrangler

Sammy Gutierrez lived with her parents on a Texas ranch before Camp Cretaceous. Ever the optimist she remarked, "At least I was already used to big animals before that whole fiasco! There;s really not much difference between a longhorn and a Triceratops if you think about it."

Back at home, Gutierrez maintained that positive attitude by staying busy.

"I have my own ranch, now. And my girlfriend, Yaz. And tons of pies to bake! We don't have time to keep worrying about all that running for our lives stuff!"

Yaz: A Track Star and Her Team

Yasmina Fadoula went from national track star to Nublar Six survivor in the span of months, and the aftermath hit her particularly hard.

"I wasn't used to feeling helpless. Before, I would just push through to the finish line no matter what. Nublar made me realize you can't win all your races alone."

She credits her relationship with fellow survivor Sammy Gutierrez as a major source of support.

"I've been going through a lot of anxiety since coming back, and Sammy's been there constantly. I want to show her I can be the strong person she sees in me."

Kenji: Cool Kid Finds New Family

Kenji Kon has declined to comment on his father's incarceration.

"All that matters is my new family. They're the ones who always had my back."

The Nublar Six have been instrumental in Kenji's return to normal life, from his relationship with Brooklynn, to his best friend Darius.

"All I wanna do is chill, you know? I've moved out somewhere peaceful. Started my climbing school. All is good in Casa de Kenji."

End Transcript. The page of Kenji's interview has a ragged edge, like the page next to it has been torn out. There is no interview for Brooklynn. End ID]

[shironezuninja]

I don’t understand why my email signal is very slow lately.

[ozzgin]

Ozzgibz my lord may we have just one more crumb of pickle content pls pls pls🙏🙏🙏

Like I have an idea, reader as pickles mother🧐 like like like U wake up together after many many years

Not just a crumb, but an entire loaf! :D I will use this chance to finally finish all of the Pickle related requests I currently have. (At least I hope I haven’t omitted anything). So you may consider this a Pickle megathread, containing multiple requests put together.

Pickle Headcanons: A collection

Featuring Pickle and Reader: Pickle’s Mother! Reader, Pickle trying modern treats, Pickle and his newborn, Pickle x Student! Reader and Pickle x OP! Reader.

Pickle’s Mother! Reader

You wake up surrounded by heavy, intricate machinery and at a certain point it occurs to you just how long your slumber has been. Ah, that explains the peaceful, uninterrupted rest. You can’t recall the last time you slept this well. And, like clockwork, you hear the humans scream mere seconds after you stretch your rusted bones. A familiar growl jolts you back into action. Being frozen for millennia sadly doesn’t strip you of your motherly role.

With a groan, you rip the medical cords away from your body, indifferent to the frightened stares of the scientists currently unsure of your intentions. They needn’t be afraid for long. With the calculated movements of someone that has been doing this one too many times, you walk towards the source of ruckus and return with Pickle under your arm. It’s almost as if you’re wearing an invisible hero cape: the research team can finally relax knowing Pickle’s fearsome mother is here to keep him under control.

This arrangement now poses an interesting dilemma: how will the fights unfold under the watchful gaze of a protective, Jurassic mom? Should the fighters be worried about a vengeful counterattack if they’re too hasty with your son? The first one to test the waters is Retsu, and before he enters the arena you place a heavy hand on his shoulder, briefly guiding him aside. He nervously watches your gestures as you pretend to beat up an invisible opponent. Are you showing him potential punishments? Then you give him a friendly nudge and point to Pickle. Realization sinks in and he stares at you, wide eyed. You’re giving him advice on how to give Pickle a proper beating. Well, obviously. If they’re going to challenge your menace of a son, they should at least make it worthwhile. Rough him up a little. At the end of the day, it’s less work for you.

Pickle tries modern treats

Pickle would probably lose his mind with any carbonated drink or sweet flavor. He never had access to this amount of sugar, so I’m wondering if he’d think it’s poisonous once he becomes agitated from the abrupt intake. Nice, exquisite smell and a vibrant color that tempts him enough to give it a try. Next thing you know, the liquid sizzles in his mouth and he panics, but eventually settles down. Then his heartbeat increases and he’s squirming under the confused stares of the fighters (who initially offered him the drink), until Professor Payne points out his body might not be accustomed to our levels of sugar. The real trouble starts once he can handle the unhealthy snacks, because someone will have to stop him from overeating. (To be fair I’ve also never had a Baja Blast, seems less popular/available in Europe but it looks nice.)

Pickle unable to care for his baby

They say your life flashes before your eyes as you die and you certainly gazed upon a delectable bunch of recollections when the prehistoric man swung his massive body towards you, growling threateningly. They were hoping the fighters could keep him entertained long enough for you to feed the baby, but it seems his fatherly instincts (that he’s otherwise lacking) trumped his need for battle. Thankfully, he stops right before his clawed hand touches your frightened face. For the first time he sees his newborn eating, the puffy cheeks expanding with each gulp of the mysterious bottled liquid you’re providing.

Well, if all you’re doing is feeding his child, he might as well keep you around. You certainly don’t look like a threat, even less so than the men he just faced in the Arena. To the relief of everyone witnessing the spectacle, you get to live and handle the baby. Not like you have significantly more experience when it comes to taking care of infants, but with the help of the scientists you manage to ease Pickle into his parenting role.

All this time spent together has reminded Pickle just how much he misses the presence of a second parent. The baby likes you, you seem to be rather knowledgeable about these matters, and you’re extremely cute if he is to be fully honest with himself. The Jurassic man can’t help the faint smile gracing his features whenever he pictures it: you make a nice family, wouldn’t you agree?

Pickle x Student! Female Reader

You’ve learned to ignore the bewildered stares. Thankfully, this time, the only unusual sight consists of Pickle’s gargantuan size and nothing else. He’s dressed in modern attire and has since learned to behave better in public. You recall the first encounters, where an almost naked Jurassic creature kept following you around and wouldn’t take no for an answer. It took you several weeks to figure out he’s interested in you, and you eventually relented. Naturally you couldn’t have gone outside with a wild jungle beast donning a fundoshi and nothing else. So you did your best to instill modern customs into your new boyfriend.

And, for the most part, it worked. He’s sitting with you on a campus bench, politely waiting for you to finish your rough sketch. He enjoys watching your drawing process, especially if he’s the subject of the piece. A giddy feeling overwhelms him, almost as if he’s being physically touched with each stroke of the pencil. The fact that you observe him so carefully, and then somehow reproduce the image so accurately on paper…It entertains him greatly. Sadly he can’t return the favor. You’ve offered him drawing tools before in case he wanted to join your creative hobby, but there was no dormant Botticelli in his soul waiting to be awakened.

While he may not share your artistic inclination, you can at least be assured that no threat will ever reach your proximity again. His hands were built for battle and he makes sure you witness this truth on every occasion. No fight begins without your presence in the Underground Arena. As much as you feel for his battered opponents, the whole ordeal results in very neat action frames. You leave the matches with brand new batches of doodles. Who would’ve thought you’d find your muse in a prehistoric man? Additionally, if you ever need some extra cash, there’s always the option of delving into erotic art. After all, you have access to any reference you could ever need and Pickle would be most eager to help you.

Pickle x OP! Reader

@mariahvilla569

So this was a little difficult because I wasn’t sure whether Reader is overpowered in relation to someone in particular or just the whole Bakiverse. I went for a Reader who’s stronger than everyone else.

Pickle was very confused when he met you for the first time, standing in the audience of the Underground Arena to observe his match with Retsu. He was instantly smitten and was about to discard any intention of a fight to immediately pursue you instead, but he was stopped by multiple men forming a barrier before you and an angered Retsu demanding his undivided attention. He assumed you must be someone’s partner and therefore he’ll have to win his way to you. He couldn’t have guessed in a million years that you were politely allowing everyone else to have their fun before you swiftly cashed in your victory.

You did have enough grace to take your time with the prehistoric man. He doesn’t doubt that if you so desired, you could’ve ended the battle within mere moments; but just like the rest of the men, you wanted your fair share of entertainment. This way Pickle was also offered a sample of your exquisite skills, which made all the fighters before you fade into nothingness. Truly astonishing that a human half his size would tower above him in terms of raw power. He was left beyond impressed and his initial crush has avalanched into a full blown obsession.

Just because you’re stronger doesn’t mean he can’t fulfill the duties of a protective partner. Consider it a way to efficiently save time, as whoever isn’t strong enough to get past him isn’t worth your precious time. Not to mention that Pickle has come to view your sparring sessions as a special form of intimacy reserved for him and you only. If you need to train, he should suffice as an opponent. There’s no one else as sturdy as him, and you’re always in a great mood after a proper fight, so he’d be an utter fool not to take advantage of it.

[sepublic]

Kinda disappointed with the official Shin Ghidorah, which is just regular Ghidorah but with a 'creepier' face like Shin Goji's. Because I always saw the design philosophy behind Shin Godzilla, and by extension any hypothetical Shin counterparts for other Kaiju, to be going back to the basics; Taking the original core idea behind a monster, and amplifying it.

Godzilla is an allegory for nuclear destruction and in some stories was created by radiation, so naturally Shin Godzilla is an irradiated mutant in constant agony over its transformation, whose final form resembles a black mushroom cloud.

So Shin Ghidorah for me should be more along the lines of... A radiant, cosmic alien god. Something so bright and overwhelming in its light that it's like facing the sun itself. A creature from the cosmos, representing one of the most powerful aspects of it. I hate to admit it, but something like the anime trilogy Ghidorah is more in lines with what I'm thinking of.

Shin Mothra would lean into the motherly guardian of nature vibes, while also embracing the fact that she's a magical girl kaiju. She's a beautiful goddess, her presence is comforting, may as well make her extra fluffy. She's easily the most conventionally good of all the monsters.

Some Shin counterparts could be more along what we got with Shin Godzilla; Shin Hedorah seems very straightforward. I also like to think of Shin Gigan, who is this reanimated, cyborg frankenstein's monster that constantly gets torn apart, only to come back each time, even more cybernetic. A creature taken apart and put back together, several times over, constantly losing itself as it gradually becomes more mechanical, a Theseus' ship. A creature that simply isn't allowed to die, its corpse pumped full of adrenaline, its heart and brain jump started, until it comes back wrong. So like Shin Godzilla, a suffering creature tormented by human technology. Gigan’s agony ramps up until it suddenly goes silent, indicating that last problematic bit of its soul has been replaced.

I wonder if a Shin Destoroyah might be reimagined as a plant monster, or some other type of organism that doesn't require oxygen to survive; Given it's to the Oxygen Destroyer what Godzilla is to the nuke, Shin Destoroyah should constantly be, well, destroying oxygen. Every living thing dependent on that is automatically suffocating just being in its presence.

Shin Jet Jaguar? A colorful tokusatsu superhero, Gurren Lagann mecha, and Pacific Rim jaeger rolled into one. Just lean into the corny cheesiness, that goofy and charismatic grin. Shin King Caesar is an ancient stone deity, a shisa statue brought to life. He’s a mythological protector who strikes fear into the hearts of evil. Gorosaurus is meant to be the biggest, baddest dinosaur ever, when a T-rex isn't enough to threaten Kong anymore. And given the dinosaurs in King Kong represent the return of the prehistoric past, Shin Gorosaurus would be like the Indominus Rex, in that it's designed to lean into all of the stereotypical cool factors of dinosaurs for kids.

[astoundingbeyondbelief]

Kaiju Week in Review (March 24-30, 2024)

A coworker asked tonight me how Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire measured up to Godzilla Minus One, and I responded, "Almost as good, but in a completely different way." If you like monsters (and if you're following me I have to assume you do), see it, no questions asked. There's about a million of them and they're all delightful. The franchise has long struggled to recapture the specific charms of the Showa era, and I think this comes closer than any of them. (It's the climactic tag-team battle... also Mothra returning to knock some sense into Godzilla). Pure junk food, but you can't just watch Oppenheimer all the time.

Godzilla x Kong tore up the box office this weekend, performing well above expectations. Its $80 million opening Stateside was the second-best of the Monsterverse (after Godzilla). It added another $114 million internationally for the best overall opening of the (still-young) year. China was a big part of that with $44 million; giant monster movies are among the few Hollywood imports that still play well there. With a $135 million budget, lowest of the Monsterverse by a wide margin, it's a matter of when, not if, Legendary announces the next one.

The Oxford English Dictionary has added an entry for tokusatsu, defined as "A genre of Japanese film or television entertainment characterized by the use of practical special effects, usually featuring giant monsters, transforming robots, and masked and costumed superheroes." It's part of a group of 23 freshly-acknowledged Japanese loan words; unclear if the timing is coincidental. Oh, and if you're curious, they added kaiju in 2018. As someone who remembers when the only English-speakers who used either word were in fandom, it's pretty wild to see.

French company Extralucid Films will release Gappa on Blu-ray in June. The impressive-sounding bonus features are naturally all in French, but there's one that transcends language: 17 minutes of extra monster footage. The U.S. version of Gappa, Monster from a Prehistoric Planet, only has about 7 minutes worth of shots absent from the Japanese version, so I'm pretty curious about the other 10. It's also the first time this footage has been released in HD (Tokyo Shock blew it in 2020).

Season 2 of Chibi Godzilla Raids Again is indeed receiving official English subtitles, starting the same day as the Japanese premiere, April 10. Godzilla Battle Line also added a hilariously busted joint Chibi Godzilla-Chibi Mechagodzilla unit, along with a Destoroyah variant. (Maybe Godzilla x Kong units are next month?)

A new Monsterverse movie means new books to buy. The prequel comic Godzilla x Kong: The Hunted is out already (not recommended), but officially you'll have to wait until April 23 for the novelization and May 14 for the art book. Chalk that up to the late release date change, maybe. Unofficially, people are already getting the novelization from Amazon, because they're a monopoly that can afford to pay the fines from publishers for breaking street date. The audiobook version also released on the same day as the film. I don't have intel on what it adds and changes yet; adding everything from the film itself to Wikizilla is all I can handle right now.

The San Francisco Giants are offering a Godzilla VIP Experience on May 17, a long-overdue acknowledgement of the savior of their city. Tickets are almost gone, though I think it's a shame that the promotion is opt-in to begin; what happened to giving these tchotchkes out to the first thousand fans? Well, figures that they'd make getting merch of the Minus One Godzilla in the States a hassle.