#again sheldon riley

[memies]

I hate the noise, but I'm the loudest

Again, Sheldon Riley

[scarisd3ad]

‘Scarisd3ad’s Masterlist

Decided to make a new one because I don’t know if all the links in my old one work anymore. As you can see I got rid of a bunch of old fic (mainly Steve’s because a lot of the things 13 y/o me wrote for him were god awful) because A I reread them and cringed my ass off while doing so, so decided to scrub any evidence of it off the internet or B the link doesn’t work in the og masterlist and I’ve lost the fic. I also got rid of a couple fandoms I write for because I either don’t get requests for them or I’m not interested in being associated with the fandom anymore.

Request box

all requests are open as of February 8th, 2024.

Key fluff - ☁️ angst - 🌧️ finished fic - ☑️ ongoing fic - ✅

events

Halloween writing challenge - ‘22, ‘23, ‘24

Christmas writing challenge - ‘23

-

stranger things

Steve harrington

found you 🌧️☁️ (series discontinued)

red 🌧️☁️ (series discontinued)

Jump then fall 🌧️☁️ (series) ✅

fake dating ☁️🌧️ pt2

first day jitters 🌧️

sober🌧️☁️

begin again🌧️☁️

promptober day 4 - decorating your apartment☁️

promtober day 18 - going to the pumpkin patch☁️

promptober day 29 - handing out candy to trick or treaters ☁️

promptmas day 6 - secret Santa ☁️

In a world of boys, he’s a gentle man ☁️

Robin Buckley

you like me? ☁️

horror movie marathon ☁️

Billy Hargrove

no Fics available

Jonathan byers

no Fics available

Eddie Munson

no Fics available

mike wheeler

no Fics available

El hopper

no Fics available

Lucas Sinclair

promptober day 9 - getting lost in a corn maze ☁️

max Mayfield

no Fics available

Dustin Henderson

no Fics available

-

scream

Billy Loomis

Trouble ☁️ (series) ✅

Stu macher

promptober day 6 - movie night ☁️

promptober day 10 - "are you scared?" 🌧️

promptober day 31 - Halloween party ☁️

Trouble ☁️ (series) ✅

Sidney Prescott

no Fics available

Tatum riley

promptober day 5 - shopping for Halloween costumes☁️

Dewey riley

no Fics available

randy Meeks

no Fics available

-

miscellaneous

Jason dean (heathers)

no Fics available

Conrad fisher (tsitp)

no Fics available

min ho (xo kitty)

no Fics available

bill denbrough (IT)

no Fics available

Georgie cooper (young Sheldon)

no Fics available

Cooper Adam’s (trap)

No fics available

Paddy (speak no evil)

No fics available

-

the last of us (hbo and game)

Joel miller

superstar☁️🌧️(series) ✅

highway don't care 🌧️☁️

promptober day 16 -trick or treating with him and Sarah ☁️

promptmas day 3 - baby its cold outside ☁️

promptmas day 7 - decorating the tree. ☁️

promptmas day 10 - writing Christmas letters with Sarah ☁️

promptmas day 12 - Christmas day ☁️

Too sweet 🌧️

Ellie Williams

no Fics available

Tommy miller

no Fics available

-

The black phone

Vance hopper

grabbed🌧️

the grabbed🌧️(series) ☑️

wearing his vest (blurb)☁️

matching costumes☁️🌧️

braids☁️

Promptober day 8 - “I don’t dance”☁️

Promptober day 13 - “take them all”☁️

Promptober day 30 - Halloween sleepover☁️

Bruce Yamada

Promptober Day 12 - dancing in the rain☁️

Promptober day 24 - going to the carnival ☁️

Promptmas day 9 - snowball fight☁️

robin Arellano

Robin standing up for chubby!girlfriend!reader🌧️☁️

Finney Blake

Trick or treating ☁️

-

the walking dead

Daryl Dixon

to the end and back (series)🌧️☁️✅

promptober day 2 -"its cold" ☁️

promptober day 19 - "i dont do cotumes" (pre apocalypse! daryl)☁️

promptmas day 2 - first christmas after the world ends ☁️

Carl Grimes

Promptober day 7 - “do you think it’s Halloween yet?”☁️

Promptober day 22 - cuddles ☁️

Promptober day 25 - telling scary stories☁️

Promptmas day 8 - reminiscing on past Christmases☁️

Rick Grimes

no Fics available

Glenn Rhee

August - betty - cardigan (mini series)🌧️☁️✅

Promptober day one - drunk after a bonfire ☁️

Promptober day 11 - stealing their sweaters ☁️

Promptober day 17 - the power going out (pre apocalypse Glenn) ☁️

Promptober day 21 - injuries 🌧️☁️

Promptober day 23 - “do you miss Halloween?” ☁️

Maggie Greene/Rhee

No Fics available

-

Five Nights At Freddy

Promptober day 15 - Sneaking into the pizzaria🌧️

Promptober day 26 - comforting cc after mike scares him 🌧️

Micheal Afton/Schmitt

Promptober day 3 - trick or treating with cc, Elizabeth, and Mike ☁️

Promptober day 14 - Halloween party ☁️

Promptober day 27 - “I hate Halloween” 🌧️

Promptmas day 1 - baking cookies with him and Abby☁️

Promptmas day 11 - the night before Christmas ☁️

William Afton

Freddy fazbear (any variant)

No Fics available

Chica(any variant)

No Fics available

Foxy (any variant)

No Fics available

Bonnie (any variant)

No Fics available

Montgomery gator

Promptober day 28 - Sneaking out of the pizzaplex to trick or treat☁️

Roxanne wolf

No Fics available

sun/moon

No Fics available

-

Talk to me

Hayley

Promptober day 20 Having an encounter with the hand 🌧️

Mia

No Fics available

Jade

No Fics available

Daniel

No Fics available

-

Descendants

Mal

No Fics available

Evie

No fics available

Carlos de vil

No fics available

Jay

No fics available

Harry hook

No fics available

Uma

No fics available

Ben Florian

No fics available

Chad charming

No fics available

Hades

No fics available

[billy-hitchcock]

Here we go again

So I'm getting back into Eurovision and before I try out another poll tournament I'm going to give my top 5 from each year since 2021

2021

5.Italy Måneskin Zitti E Buoni

4.Switzerland Gjon's Tears Tout l'Univers

3.Ukraine Go_A Shum (There isn't a yellow option)

2.Finland Blind Channel Dark Side

1.Bulgaria Victoria Growing up is getting old

2022

5.Azerbaijan Nadir Rustamli Fade to black

4.Montenegro Vladana Breathe

3.Moldova Zdob și Zdub & Advahov Brothers Trenulețul

2.France Alvan & Ahez Fulenn

1.Australia Sheldon Riley Not the same

2023

5.Slovenia Joker Out Carpe Diem 4.France La Zarra Évidemment 3.Norway Alessandra Queen Of Kings 2.Finland Käärijä Cha Cha Cha 1.Croatia Let 3 Mama ŠČ!

2024

5.Estonia 5Minuust & Puuluup (nendest) narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi (it wont let me use black lmao) 4.Switzerland Nemo The Code 3.Croatia Baby Lasagna Rim Tim Tagi Dim 2.Norway Gåte Ulveham 1.Ireland Bambie Thug Doomsday Blue

Please leave your personal opinions in the comments!

Ok I thought it'd be irresponsible to talk about Eurovision without speaking about Israel, I excluded Israel in all these rankings because no matter what you support you have to admit that they have broken international law and brought this years contest into disrepute (the reason they disqualified Russia in 2022) by harassing other delegates and if the EBU wants Eurovision to continue I think we need Israel banned until this horrible conflict is over and sorted.

[ofmoonlitmagic]

I've been hurt once Then it happened again Oh I've lost trust Again and again and again

----

Oh I hate the noise but I'm the loudest Built my walls but now I'm drowning Reckless but I still allow it Hate that I'm to blame

Why does this happen Again and again and again and again

[purrgilpawkins]

Merry + Christmas

Summary: The team spends their Christmas Day in Phoenix med. (Also available on AO3)

Pairings: Wilt Bozer & Jack Dalton & Riley Davis & Angus MacGyver

Part of the Whump Advent Calendar 2020 series Prompt: Christmas Celebrations / With Found Family

Warnings: n/a

Notable tags: fluff, Christmas fluff, H/C

Mac waved his casted arm and Jack weakly raised a hand in greeting as Bozer wheeled Riley in through the door.

“Hey, Jack,” Riley started softly, “how’re you feeling?” Jack gave a thumbs up and pointed a finger to Riley. “I’m fine, Jack, don’t worry,” she laughed, rubbing at the bandage on her abdomen.

Bozer parked Riley’s wheelchair on the side of the delta’s hospital bed opposite of Mac as Jack reached up to remove the oxygen mask on his face. “You should know by now…it’s my job to--” he gasped, “--to worry, Riles.”

“Hey, hey, you heard the doc, Jack. That pneumonia isn’t letting you breathe and neither is taking off that mask. So please, just this once, keep it on?” Mac asked, taking Jack’s hand into his own. Jack groaned in response which led to a rough coughing fit. The younger man gave the older one a sip of water from the cup sitting next to the bed, Jack giving Mac a look that roughly translated to an apology all the while. An apology more so for scaring them all at his close call with death rather than the mask removal.

Mac put the cup back down as Riley placed the four presents she was carrying in her lap at the end of Jack’s bed. Bozer moved them around to their respective receiver, coughing into his arm every now and again. The water boarding he’d received wasn’t nearly as bad as Jack’s but it was still hell on his lungs.

“Well!” Bozer clasped his hands together, “It’s a good thing we did Secret Santa this year. Makes this a whole lot easier on everyone after being…kidnapped and tortured for a week and a half,” Bozer grew quiet and everyone let the silence wash over them. “Little disappointing we have to spend our Christmas in Phoenix med though.”

“Unfortunately, I don’t see Agent Dalton leaving for the next few days, so I’d say better here than not at all,” one of the regular nurses, Sheldon, popped his head in the room, startling everyone. “And I don’t want to ruin the festivities but try not to go on too long. Jack needs his rest.”

Jack grunted, displeased.

Sheldon chuckled, “I expect you not to strain yourself, Jack.” He turned to Riley, “You neither, though I don’t see you getting up on that leg anytime soon.” Then to Bozer, “Get yourself an ice pack for that black eye, Boze.” At Bozer’s reluctant head nod, Sheldon turned to Mac, “And you don’t put too much pressure on that wrist. I know how important those hands are to you.” Mac nodded. “Okay, any painkillers needed?” Sheldon smiled at everyone’s muttered “no”.

“Did Matty send you down here, Hawkes?” Mac asked.

Sheldon nodded, “She seemed really worried about you all. Said she’s sorry she can’t say hello and check up on you in person yet. She also said ‘Merry Christmas’.”

“Well tell her we’re sad she can’t be here and a Merry Christmas to her too,” Riley piped up.

“Will do,” Sheldon smiled and walked out of the room, leaving the bruised and battered team to go about their celebrations.

Mac sat up straight in his uncomfortable seat, “Okay, who’s first?”

“Rock, paper, scissors?” Riley suggested.

“Flip a coin maybe?” Bozer recommended. Jack groaned his disapproval at that option.

“All at the same time then?” Mac proposed.

“Oh no way man, that completely ruins the magic!”

“Magic? What--”

“Ladies first…” Jack whispered hoarsely.

“I’m alright with that,” Riley said and immediately started ripping open her present before the argument could begin. The wrapping paper hit the floor and uncovered a small rectangular box. Riley opened the box and fondly rolled her eyes.

“What? What is it?” Bozer questioned, leaning in uncomfortably close to see what she got.

Riley pulled the object from the box, “It’s a knife.” Indeed it was, a folding knife with a pastel pink handle. “Hmm…I wonder who this is from.” She looked directly at Jack.

“For when a boy tries to talk to ya,” he said, words muffled behind the oxygen mask, “Keep it in your boot or backpack with your rig or something.”

“Okay, dad. I am a grown ass woman who doubles as a highly trained government agent, y’know.”

“Just in case.”

Riley laughed and reached as far as she could from her wheelchair to gently hug Jack, “Thank you, Jack. I love it.”

“Speaking of Jack,” Mac placed a wrapped gift in Jack’s lap, “you’re next, big guy.”

Jack unwrapped the present with shaky hands that no one wanted to acknowledge. He pulled a white ceramic mug from the paper.

“I’m, uh, not the best at gift giving so I went with something practical,” Mac said, nervously rubbing at the back of his neck.

Jack turned the mug in his hand to see the phrase “MIT Dad” stamped on the other side of it. His eyes started to dampen embarrassingly quick and if anyone asked he’d blame it on the drugs in his system. He looked to Mac who stared back in search of approval and Jack opened up his arms to give that approval. Mac reached out and hugged Jack almost as gently as Riley did.

“Love it, hoss,” Jack said.

Mac gave a shaky laugh, “Cool.”

Riley cut their moment short when she picked up the biggest present and gave it to Bozer.

“Oh for me? You shouldn’t have!” Bozer said as he ripped off the wrapping as fast as possible and opened the box in childlike excitement. He gasped, “Riley, you really shouldn’t have.”

“What is it, Boze?” Mac asked, taking a page out of Bozer’s book and leaning into his personal space to see his friend’s gift.

“It’s expensive looking kitchen utensils…and an even more expensive looking video camera…Riley how much did you spend on me?”

“Don’t worry about it. Just worry about how high quality your movies are gonna look now that you have the cheaper alternative to an actual professional film camera.” Riley smirked.

“And the cooking set?”

“If it helps make your food taste even better than it’s worth the price tag.”

“Aw, Riley!” Bozer suddenly engulfed Riley in a hug, sudden enough that she wasn’t able to reciprocate because he’d wrapped his arms around her arms.

“Yeah, yeah, you’re welcome but could you let up on the vice grip, please?”

Bozer pulled back, “Right, sorry, that probably didn’t do those cuts on your stomach any favors.”

“Nah it’s all good. No damage done.”

“Sweet,” Bozer then pulled the camera out of his gift box and started turning it on.

“Bozer,” Jack uttered from his bed.

“Huh?”

Jack nodded his head to Mac.

“Oh! Of course. Almost forgot. Mac!” Bozer handed the last present laying on the bed to Mac, “Your present this year is courtesy of me. I mean, mostly me. Like, it was mostly my idea but it’s kinda from all of us.”

Mac took the gift in his good hand and placed his cast on it to take the paper off of it easier. Jack held out his hand as Mac struggled to remove the wrapping but brought it back when Mac stubbornly said, “I got it.” It took him a minute but he did eventually get some of the paper off his present. When he managed to uncover the front of it he stopped unwrapping.

“What is it, Mac? What’d you get?” Riley asked quietly.

Mac looked up at his friends and saw them all smiling at him and he smiled back. He looked back to his present, a framed picture of them all; himself, Jack, Bozer, Riley, and Matty, everyone he cared about in the picture.

“Thanks, guys. Really. It means a lot.”

Jack reached over and lightly gripped Mac’s forearm as Bozer rounded the bed to give Mac a hug. After all their hugs and continued thanks to one another for the gifts, the group spent the rest of their Christmas celebrations happily in each other’s presence.

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2022: #26

26. Cyprus

Andromache - “Ela” 27th place

Decade Rank: #52/79 [Above Blind Channel, below The Black Mamba]

Happy holidays! It’s time to emerge from off-season mode and power through the remainder of these updates, as we get excited for more niche faves that are destined to fall flat and be terrible (my prayers are with you, Megara and Tokimeki and Chérine). 

Funnily enough I HAD prepared an larger, sharper update for Andromache earlier but my PC crashed so here’s a more unabridged and ranty version: CYPRUS HAD THAT NQ COMING!!!!!! For the past four years they were riding Eleni’s coattails and attempting to placate the Fa...ns Of This Show in increasedly soulless knock-offs, so it was only a matter that came flying back into their faces like a fanged boomerang.

I wasn’t necessarily rooting for the failure of this *particular* Cyprus entry, though. “Ela” at least made an attempt at sounding genuinely Cypriotic. It also somehow took ten people, (one of them being one of Stefania’s Invisible Men), to write this basic ethnic tune. To top it of, an anemic female lead whose name can affectionately (and accurately) be bastardized into “AndroidMachine”. The bones of a quirky random fave were there!

Sadly, the live. I don’t think the voice was as bad as I’ve seen others proclaim it to have been, but it was Very Not Good. AndroidMachine always the problem of sounding both very nasal and very bored, like a Sarah McTiernan on perdolan,  but even with taking that into account, it’s surprising she did so poorly. She failed to hit many notes of this - again- really basic tune while virtually standing still? Did you not rehearse, Andro? Do you have an Ikea membership I’m unaware of?

Worse vocals have qualified before though, so good visuals COULD have brought solace (in the form of shoving Azer out of the finals), but alas. 

Cramming Andro into a polystyreme scallop and having her emit a mermaid call like was a promising premise. I WAS hoping for a Batista-like staging, as with shirtless adonises to distract as much as possible from Andromache being... wel... herself.  

However, the act Cyprus went with was just some inane flailing + colours projections that cast shadows ON THE FUCKING SHELL. 

But don’t worry about the lack of dynamism, after the blue, we’re going repeat the same thing with yellow and magenta. 🙃 It’s easy to see why Cyprus NQ’d but also see that it very easily could have been avoided. Just... give us some life? Some movement? Like a performance befitting an AndroidMachine, "Ela” was run entirely on Airplane Mode. 

But hey at least the Basics got to live their life out of this one, I guess, evidenced by that one Spanish guy getting the shell tattoo’d on his wrist. 😂 (was he Spanish? idk. Getting an “Ela” tattoo requires a specific combination of feral impulsivity and insanity that I’m only willing to attribute to certain Spanish fans). Each to their own, I guess, and I have other faves to stan!

I cannot wait to see which lessons Cyprus have learned from this journey 🙂 (none, because they chose Andrew Limpbrou for 2023 lmfaooooo)

BUT WAIT because it’s been so long and it’s almost New Year here’s a bonus update where I boot some additional rando I don’t really care for. Let’s hear it for:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

25. ARMENIA 

Rosa Linn - “Snap” 20th place

Decade rank: 50/79 [above The Black Mamba, below James Newman]

"Snap” is cute. It was a fairly unremarkable Eurovision entry though. 🙂

THE RANKING

25. ARMENIA - Rosa Linn - “Snap” 26. CYPRUS - Andromache - “Ela” 27. LATVIA - Citi Zeni - “Eat your salad” 28. DENMARK - ReDDI - “The show” 29. BULGARIA - Intelligent Music Project - “Intention” 30. GREECE - Amanda Tenjford - “Die together” 31. POLAND - Ochman - “River” 32. MONTENEGRO - Vladana - “Breathe” 33. FINLAND - The Rasmus - "Jezebel" 34. BELGIUM - Jérémie Makiese - “Miss you” 35. NORWAY - Subwoolfer - “Give that wolf a banana” 36. AUSTRALIA - Sheldon Riley - “Not the same” 37. SWITZERLAND - Marius Bear - “Boys do cry” 38. AZERBAIJAN - Nadir Rustamli - “Fade to black” 39. ITALY - Mahmood & Blanco - “Brividi” 40. ISRAEL - Michael Ben David - “I.M” (yes, that is the canonical Rosa Linn write-up ^_^)

[lnights]

1, 3, 6, 9, 11, 16, 24, 28, 30 and 33 please! 💖 /🐍

🎶🎵🐍

1. A song you like with a colour in the title

"House of Gold" by Twenty One Pilots. (I'm saying gold counts lol

3. A song that reminds you of summertime

"Glad you came" by We Came as Romans

6. A song that makes you wanna dance

"Love Me Again" by John Newman

9. A song that makes you happy

"Hypa Hypa" by Electric Callboy.

11. A song you never get tired of

"Breaking the Habit" by Linkin Park.

16. One of your favourite non-english or Korean songs

"Zitti e Buoni" by Mäneskin

24. A song by a band you wish were still together

"In the End" by Linkin Park, anything by them really.

28. A song by an artist with a voice you love

"Not the Same" by Sheldon Riley, sup Eurovision 2022

30. A song that reminds you of yourself

"Awake" by Lost Society

33. Wildcard! A song recommendation!

"Dreams" by Rain City Drive

[tampon-on-the-sidewalk]

Eurovision Semi Final 2 Facts to share During the Postcards!

My post for Semi Final 1 did so well, I’ll do it again for the 2nd!  Unless otherwise noted, the artists had some involvement in the songwriting process.

1. Finland- The Rasmus- Jezebel The band formed in 1994 and has achieved global fame with their song In The Shadows, a career spanning 9 albums. This is the first song with guitarist Emppu Suhonen after founding member Pauli Rantasalmi left. Desmond Child, known for writing many Bon Jovi songs(among others) and most recently Kings and Queens by Ava Max, co-wrote the song. 

2. Israel- Michael Ben David- I.M- 25 years old, he is the second oldest of 6 and won X-factor in Israel with Netta as his coach. He went to a performing arts school and also worked as a singing waiter. 

3. Serbia- Konstrakta- In Corpore Sano- 43 years old, she has been performing since age 19. She was a frontwoman of a band until her solo debut in 2019. Her stage name is inspired from her major in Architecture. The song title, as well as some lyrics, are in Latin.

4. Azerbaijan- Nadir Rustamli- Fade to Black- 22 years old, he started his musical career in 2017. He won The Voice in his country in 2021, then was internally selected to compete in Eurovision. First artist this year with no involvement in the songwriting process.

5. Georgia- Circus Mircus- Lock Me In- Formed in 2020, they are circus academy dropouts turned musicians. They were internally selected. I couldn’t find much info on the song itself, or what their involvement in the writing process was.

6. Malta- Emma Muscat- I Am What I Am- 22. Daughter of the heads of a clothing company, and a classically trained pianist. Musical debut in 2016.Emma originally planned on sending a different song before a last-minute change.

7. San Marino- Achille Lauro- Stripper- 31 years old, he competed in Italy’s national final three times before competing and winning San Marino’s this year. Known for his controversial songs and staging choices. Made recording debut in 2012.

8. Australia- Sheldon Riley- Not the Same- 23 years old, competed in X-Factor Australia, The Voice Australia twice, and America’s Got Talent before winning Australia’s National Final. He made his recording debut in 2018. Eurovision has been his dream ever since seeing Conchita win in 2014. 

9. Cyprus- Andromache- Ela- 27 years old, She participated in The Voice of Greece in 2015. Made her recording debut in 2017. Not involved in the song writing process.

10. Ireland- Brooke- That’s Rich- 23 years old, she was in several musical productions in highschool including Fame, Mama Mia and Sister Act. Finished 3rd in The Voice UK in 2020. 

11.North Macedonia- Andrea- Circles- 22 years old, she was discovered on social media by a producer. Lived in New York as a child, and inspired by Gospel, R&B and Pop-punk. Hayley Williams of Paramore is her main inspiration. Made her recording debut in 2020.

12. Estonia- STEFAN- Hope- 24 years old, he endered the national final 4 times in total since 2018. He won The Masked Singer Estonia.

13. Romania- WRS- Llamame 29 years old, started as a back-up dancer and part of the Pro TV Ballet before making his solo debut in 2020. He was nominated for 2 awards.He was part of a boyband in 2015.

14. Poland- Ochman- River- 22 years old, he was born in Massachusetts to a Polish family. Was Prince Charmind in his school’s performance of Cinderella. Went to Poland for Music University. Won The Voice Poland in 2020 on Michal Szpak(2016 representative)’s ream. 

15. Montenegro- Vladana- Breathe- 35 years old, she studied music theory and opera. Degree in Journalism. Recording debut in 2003, was internally selected. She is editor-in-chief of an Online fashion magazine. The last time Montenegro was in the ESC was 2019.

16.Belgium- Jeremie Makiese- Miss You. 21 Years old, he joined his church choir at a young age. In 2021 he won The Voice Belgium, and was internally selected. Influences include Michael Jackson, James Brown and Aretha Franklin, as well as Stromae. He is a proffessional footballer. 

17. Sweden- Cornelia Jakobs- Hold Me Closer- 30 years old, daughter of The Poodles’ lead singer. Entered Melfest 2021 as a songwriter. Made recording debut in 2018, but her tv debut in 2008 on Swedish Idol. 

18. Czech Republic- We Are Domi-Lights Off- Formed in 2016, they met at the Leeds College of Music in the UK. Dominika Hasova, the singer, is Czech-American(born in NY) while the other two,  Casper Hatlestad and  Benjamin Rekstad, are Norwegian. The latter two are music teachers.

[rapha-reads]

Eurovision 2022 : only two months left ! (may 10th)

Time to check the songs - part 3

Albania, Montenegro, Germany, Australia, Denmark

Part 1 : Spain, Italy, Lithuania, Latvia and Norway

Part 2 : Poland, San Marino, Finland, Estonia, Netherlands

Remember to block the tags (eurovision, esc, esc 2022) way ahead of time...

Albania : Ronela Hajati, Sekret

Not to be wlw on main, but. I am. Looking. O.o You can always count on Albania to send their hottest women. Question : what is it with that crazy haircut? I think she'll be way better in a live performance, she seems like a powerhouse that is too restricted by the music video format.

Pros: good voice, excellent dance moves, amazing aesthetic, the instrumental music is good (those eastern notes as always). Cons: the music video is way too straight, too much English, a bit too weak? Overall: 7/10.

Montenegro : Vladana, Breathe

Ooooh, I got tricked again! It started as a boring sad ballad and then it turned into a sad pop beat! Also, checking the comments, I learned about her history, and yeah. The lyrics are beautiful.

Pros: she's gorgeous, so much emotion in her voice I think she'll be amazing live, the lyrics are deep and the melody is a bop. Cons: ... it's all in English. Overall: 9/10.

Germany : Malik Harris, Rockstars

Darling if I wanted to listen to Flatsound or Alec Benjamin and have a 3am sad session in the dark, I'd put an acoustic indie playlist on. Also this is 2022, acid wash blond hair was 20 years in the past. Yo, sweetie, if you're a rockstar, GIVE ME SOME ROCK. This is 3am depressed indie. Not what I sign up for in Eurovision. SMYL called, they want their sad groove back.

Pros: really nice voice (I can be fair), acceptable rap flow, can play his instruments on his own. Cons: I am. Bored. And unentertained. And getting depressed. This is Gay Olympics, not Live Aids. Overall: 7/10.

Australia : Sheldon Riley, Not The Same

OH MY GODS, IT'S SHELDON RILEY. Shut uuuuup, The Voice Australia is THE BEST, okay. I'm already hyped, and I'm not supposed to get hyped for Australia, THEY'RE NOT IN EUROPE. Okay, let's hit play.

NOW THIS IS GAY OLYMPICS. Fuuuuck, I got chills, he's so good! His voice is even better, his style is impeccable (I know it's slightly the same outfit as during his Voice Blind Audition but it's gorgeous), the lyrics are relatable... Montaigne last year, Sheldon this year... Australia, we love you, but stop trying to win. We're not having EUROvision Down Under. Please?

No but I just relistened to his All Stars Blind Audition and I'm crying. I love Sheldon. Go listen to his stuff.

Pros: everything. Cons: it's Australia... Overall: 10/10.

Denmark : Reddi, The Show

Oh, oh, OH, OH. Got tricked again. Was already starting to complain about the lack of piano on fire but then they punked everything up. Really vibing with this one !

Pros: girls' band! punk rock! stylin' suits! gorgeous hair! great voice! Cons: the beginning is too slow. Overall: 9/10.

Bonus points to Montenegro and Denmark for trolling all of us who always complain about ballads!

Next part : Serbia, Ireland, Romania, Switzerland and Moldovia.

[eurotastic]

Eurovision Reviews: Semi final 2 2022

1: Finland: The Rasmus - Jezebel

Sending The Rasmus is the most finnish thing Finland could possibly do - after getting fantastic results last year with an imitation of 2002 rock music, now they're sending the real thing. I love how dedicated Finland is to rock music, this song slaps, and I really hope they get good results.

8/10

2: Israel: Michael Ben David - I.M

He's the gayest man in Tel Aviv and I love him for it. The lyrics are just a mishmash of Rupaul's drag race catchphrases, except for that one line about middle east sex appeal, that one's new. I know this isn't strong enough for the competition but I think it's so much fun.

6/10

3: Serbia: Konstrakta - In Corpore Sano

I have to be honest, at first, I really disliked the Meghan Markle namedrop at the very beginning of the song. Sure, it grabs your attention, but the reference feels instantly dated, in a way that works against the rest of the song, which feels timeless yet undeniably modern. Despite this one problem, I have come to really love this song, it's truly unique, both in sound and lyrical content. Konstrakta comes across as less of a singer and more as a genius performance artist.

8/10

4: Azerbaijan: Nadir Rustamli - Fade To Black

It's Azerbaijan going back to their usual schtick - A competent song sung by a competent singer, with competent staging, there's probably a couple of competent Swedish songwriters in there somewhere. It's fine, I don't hate it but it's so hard to get excited about it. It goes into one ear and out of the other. Cute staging though.

5/10

5: Georgia: Circus Mircus - Lock Me In

I love it when Georgia gets weird. I heard a rumor that they are going to have an actual puppet show on stage, and if that's true, I'm going to lose my mind, this entire band is a weird acid trip. Also, I'm really glad to see Nika Kocharov in Eurovision again, he represented Georgia in 2016 with, Midnight Gold, which is probably the most underrated Eurovision song in recent memory as well as one of my personal favorites.

8/10

6: Malta: Emma Muscat - I Am What I Am

Who is this for? No, really, who is going to feel inspired by this? It sounds like pop music for really religious kids who aren't allowed to listen to real pop music.

2/10

7: San Marino: Achille Lauro - Stripper

There's a gay Italian cowboy stripper riding a mechanical bull surrounded by nuclear grade pyrotechnic explosions, who cares about the song? Jokes aside, this song was in my top 10 even before I saw the staging - It's a fun rock song that doesn't take itself too seriously, and sometimes that's all you need.

10/10

8: Australia: Sheldon Riley - Not the Same

I'm not a big fan of self-empowerment songs that sound sad and tragic, and I can't find a single positive emotion in this song, it's all misery and desperation. His voice is incredible, his stage costume is absolutely beautiful, but I don't know how I'm supposed to feel listening to the song. I should probably be moved to tears, but I have no idea if it's supposed to be happy or sad tears, so it ends up being neither.

5/10

9: Cyprus: Andromache - Ela

The Greek language is so beautiful to me - I have really missed hearing it in Eurovision over the past few years. The song sounds the way being on a Mediterranean island vacation feels.

7/10

10: Ireland: Brooke Scullion - That's Rich

It's like if Michelle from Derry Girls tried to be a popstar, so that's fun. It's pretty ironic that a song called "That's rich" sounds so cheap.

6/10

11: North Macedonia: Andrea - Circles

This song is just nothing. It goes on and on and on for what feels like three hours, and absolutely nothing happens.

2/10

12: Estonia: Stefan - Hope

It's Avicii's cowboy era with some added Morricone inspiration - the production sounds flawless. I can't understand a word he's saying though, I think he's slurring his words to sound more like a cowboy.

Also, I'm sad that we won't get to see the intended staging for this - the desert landscape would have been exactly what this song needed, but I guess we're getting a black hole instead.

7/10

13: Romania: WRS - Llámame

It feels like something from Eurovision 2009, even though the song is pretty modern. I really like it, it's pure eurovision camp, but it's a little bit mediocre.

6/10

14: Poland: Ochman - River

He has the best vocals of the year, hands down. They have definitely taken some inspiration from Gjon's Tears - I get it, he won last year's jury vote so it's probably a smart move. It's really modern and beautifully produced, but the songwriting is just good, not great. His vocals are making the song sound a lot bigger than it actually is.

8/10

15: Montenegro: Vladana - Breathe

I wish it wasn't in English, because I wish I could unhear these lyrics. It tries so hard to be important and dramatic, but it just falls flat.

2/10

16: Belgium: Jérémie Makiese - Miss You

I like how we're getting this one song that feels like American rnb - there is room for that in Eurovision! With that said, it's pretty forgettable, and I'm worried about his live vocals.

5/10

17: Sweden: Cornelia Jakobs - Hold Me Closer

I think this is Sweden's best song since Euphoria, and it's the most genuinely emotional song Sweden has sent in my lifetime. There's zero artifice, but it's still an expertly written pop song. I love the perfectly imperfect vocals, they're not for everyone, but it feels great to get something potentially polarizing from Sweden, just this one time. It's the authentic Swedish indie pop that fans have been asking for for years, and it deserves all the hype it gets. It's the right song at the right time, pun intended.

10/10

18: Czech Republic: We Are Domi - Lights Off

This song is doing everything right - the production is great, the staging is exciting, the song is catchy - but I keep forgetting that it exists. I can remember how it goes, but I can't remember that it's in the competition. I like it, don't get me wrong, but I can't call it a favorite.

6/10

[fireladybuckley]

Eurovision opinions! I liveblogged the whole thing, but this is just a masterpost for my thoughts on each song, partially so I can remember later which ones I liked!

Czech Republic Lights Off - We Are Domi It’s not a bad song by any means, but I just found it okay.  Kinda catchy, but kinda generic.

Romania Llámame - WRS Love the outfits, pretty catchy, pretty gay.  Not bad!

Portugal Saudade, Saudade - MARO For a ballad this is nice.  I like their voices a lot and the vibe is very peaceful.  I still want more craziness, but I definitely don’t mind this one.

Finland Jezebel - The Rasmus My people!  Love it.  I never know my heritage would include hard rock but you know what, I’m here for it.

Switzerland Boys Do Cry - Marius Bear Honestly... I took a bathroom break during this song.  I love that it’s against toxic masculinity but such a slow ballad >.>

France Fulenn -  Alvan & Ahez Wow.  This is not at all what I was expecting from France, its pretty fire tbh.  Surprisingly good.

Norway Give that Wolf a Banana - Subwoolfer This is honestly a much catchier song than I expected given the weird ass gifs I’ve been seeing.  Still weird AF but I might actually listen to this lmao

Armenia Snap - Rosa Linn Honestly this sounds like something I might listen to normally, I like it.  Not really feeling the ESC vibe, but it’s a decent song.  

Italy Brividi - Mahmood & BLANCO Can’t say I’m a fan of this one tbh.

Spain Slomo - Chanel Idk maybe I’m the wrong kind of gay but I expected more from a song that “gives the gays everything they want” besides some thongs and raunchy dancing. 

Netherlands De Diepte - S10 Eh.  Boring ballad.  Sorry Netherlands.

Ukraine Stefania - Kalush Orchestra Well that was not what I was expecting but I like it!  Takes the vibes from last year and puts it into a new genre.  Catchy AF.

Germany Rockstars - Malik Harris Not a terrible song, but again, fairly generic.  It’s okay. I can’t not hear “farst” instead of “fast” though lol

Lithuania Sentimentai - Monika Liu It was fine.  Can’t get over that hair though lmao

Azerbaijan Fade to Black -  Nadir Rustamli Nice voice.  So slow though.  I can’t.  Starting to fall asleep.

Belgium Miss You -  Jérémie Makiese I appreciate the aesthetic and I love that he studied geology.  Not a fan of the song though.

Greece Die Together -  Amanda Georgiadi Tenfjord Nice voice, but eh.  

Iceland Með Hækkandi Sól - Systur I wish I understood the lyrics.  Really like the vibes.

Moldova Trenulețul -  Zdob şi Zdub & Advahov Brothers Oh hell yes.  As usual, Moldova brings prime Eurovision mood.  Love it.

Sweden Hold Me Closer - Cornelia Jakobs I truly love her look and shes got a good voice.  But I’m just fed up with ballads at this point and I know there’s more so I’m just kind of not paying attention by this point.

Australia Not The Same - Sheldon Riley Another ballad.  This guy really does have an incredible voice and the song is beautiful.  Crazy outfit, love that.

UK Space Man - Sam Ryder Love the hair.  Song is meh.

Poland River - Ochman Another ballad?!  good god.  In terms of ballads, it was decent.  But I’m tired of ballads.

Serbia In Corpore Sano - Konstrakta That was... interesting.   I honestly have no idea what else to say about it.

Estonia Hope - Stefan It was okay.  Kinda boring pop number.  He’s cute and I like the sorta western vibe, but a lackluster ending to the songs.

[cruger2984]

Hetavision ‘22 - 2nd Semifinal Results!

After some suspense through the voting and all of the chaos, here are your final ten qualifiers (in random order) in the second-semifinal!

1. Belgium: Jérémie Makiese - Miss You 2. Czech Republic: We Are Domi - Lights Off 3. Azerbaijan: Nadir Rustamli - Fade to Black 4. Poland: Ochman - River 5. Finland: The Rasmus - Jezebel 6. Estonia: Stefan - Hope 7. Australia: Sheldon Riley - Not the Same 8. Sweden: Cornelia Jakobs - Hold Me Closer 9. Romania: WRS - Llámame 10. Serbia: Konstrakta - In corpore sano (In A Healthy Body)

Now it is time for you to recharge, and save some of your snacks for the Grand Final on your timezone! See you soon and join again on @hetaliadiscord!

- Liet and Pol are together again! #FinalistBoyfriends - Good to see Big Bro Ned congratulating his sister. - Looks like Aussie's back to the Final. Good for him! - Moldova is now bawling with joy to see Romania back in the Final! - Cyprus had no other choice but to go back home and decides to cheer for Greece.

[junpr]

Junpretzel’s Eurovision 2022 Recap - March 2022

🇦🇱 Albania: Ronela Hajati – Sekret

The music video is a thirst trap. A wet dream for 40 year old women who think they’re incomplete without a partner with a very strong urge to get married. I don’t like the lyrics, nothing special. Albania likes divas. I wouldn’t consider her a diva. I don’t like the song but i don’t hate it. 2/10

🇦🇲 Armenia: Rosa Linn – Snap

Billie Eyelash meets acoustic. I don’t like her vocals and the lyrics are bland. The Caucasus (Except for Georgia, my beloved) is pretty crazy about esc (don’t come at me) so i know why the music video has so many views. I don’t like the song. 2/10

🇦🇺 Australia: Sheldon Riley – Not The Same

Their costume in the national final is AMAZING. So are their vocals and the lyrics. Personally, i don’t like ballads in Eurovision. Sheldon, we ARE all the same. It’s Eurovision. We’re all gay. I wouldn’t listen to the song but i appreciate it a lot. 5/10

🇦🇹 Austria: LUM!X feat. Pia Maria – Halo

THIS IS A TOTAL BANGER. Artistically, it’s not a very original song but it slaps. There isn’t a live version of it so I’m not going to talk about Pia’s beautiful vocals. Other than that, this song is what I’d listen to in 2013 playing online browser based rpgs. I love this song but i wouldn’t call it a winner. For eurovision, 6/10 but a 8/10 for me.

🇦🇿 Azerbaijan: Nadir Rustamli – Fade To Black

Caucasians strike again. This has a lot of views but the song itself is pretty boring. Well.I really don’t have anything else to say. 2/10

🇧🇪 Belgium: Jérémie Makiese – Miss You

Boring. 2/10

🇧���� Bulgaria: Intelligent Music Project – Intention

THIS SONG IS SO UGLY IT HURTS ME. This probably is the one song i DESPISE. Anyway, eww. 0/10

🇭🇷 Croatia: Mia Dimšić – Guilty Pleasure

Another thirst trap. I like what the boy is doing on the piano though. Weird acrobatics. 2/10

🇨🇾 Cyprus: Andromache – Ela

Boring. At this point, I’m not even able to tell the songs apart. 2/10

🇨🇿 Czech Republic: We Are Domi – Lights Off

Boring.

🇩🇰 Denmark: REDDI – The Show

I REALLY WANTED TO LIKE THIS. Sapphic rock band?? Amazing. But they’re not very good. I appreciate them but they’re not very Eurovision,if you know what i mean. 2/10

🇪🇪 Estonia: Stefan – Hope

Every year a mf tries to bring Western vibes to the contest. Fuck you. 0/10

🇫🇮 Finland: The Rasmus – Jezebel

Finland knows we like rock. Not this song though. It sounds like any other rock song. 2/10

🇫🇷 France: Alvan & Ahez – Fulenn

I like that the song is in a local dialect. It doesn’t sound like it’s a French entry. I like it but i wouldn’t listen to the song, really. Not my cup of tea. 4/10

🇬🇪 Georgia: Circus Mircus – Lock Me In

It’s a pretty fun song. I’d love to see it live. It hurts me how little effort Georgia puts in Eurovision but i like the fun vibes. 5/10

🇩🇪 Germany: Malik Harris – Rockstars

Indie girl singing. Ugly. 0/10

🇬🇷 Greece: Amanda Georgiadi Tenfjord – Die Together

Lorde wannabe. Boring. 1/10

🇮🇸 Iceland: Systur – Með Hækkandi Sól

I LOVE their vibes. I think this song will grow on me more. I love it when people sing in their native language. English is dead. Nobody speaks it anyway. 5/10

🇮🇪 Ireland: Brooke – That’s Rich

Boring. 2/10

🇮🇱 Israel: Michael Ben David – I.M

HE’S SO GAY. I don’t like the song itself but the music video and their vibes are fun. 4/10

🇮🇹 Italy: Mahmood & Blanco – Brividi

Mahmood, my baby is back. I don’t like the song itself a lot but it’s good. 5/10

🇱🇻 Latvia: Citi Zēni – Eat Your Salad

AN ABSOLUTE BANGER. I LOOOOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH. WINNER!!!! 10/10

🇱🇹 Lithuania: Monika Liu – Sentimentai

I like this song. I think this will grow on me too. I like the melody. 5/10

🇲🇹 Malta: Emma Muscat – I Am What I Am

Boring. 2/10

🇲🇩 Moldova: Zdob şi Zdub & Frații Advahov – Trenulețul

THE LEGENDS ARE BACK. I LOVE everything about this song. 10/10

🇲🇪 Montenegro: Vladana – Breathe

I like her makeup and the vibes. She’s so pretty. But the song itself is pretty boring. Maybe it will grow on me. 4/10

🇳🇱 Netherlands: S10 – De Diepte

We stan a song in Dutch,but it sounds a lot like Armenia’s entry, pretty boring. 2/10

🇲🇰 North Macedonia: Andreas – Circles

Another boring song.She’s hot tho. 2/10

🇳🇴 Norway: Subwoolfer – Give That Wolf A Banana

Amour fou vibes. Amour fou >>

Every year we need a few funny, weird songs. This is one of them. I don’t like the song a lot right now but maybe it’ll grow on me. 5/10

🇵🇱 Poland: Krystian Ochman – River

Polish people are very serious about ESC, just like Azerbaijani and Armenian people. So the song has a lot of views. But i don’t like it. His vocals are good but vocals aren’t one of my priorities. 2/10

🇵🇹 Portugal: MARO – Saudade Saudade

I LOVE their vibes,the song is a bit boring but it’s one of the songs i think that’ll grow on me. 5/10

🇷🇴 Romania: WRS – Llámame

That’s what I’m talking about when i say there’s way too many people using Spanish phrases. Romania, girl, you have your own language and dialects. why. Anyway. They’re SO gay. I don’t like the song but i love the vibes. 5/10

🇸🇲 San Marino: Achille Lauro – Stripper

Stop it you’re not Damiano David.It’s embarrassing how they try to copy the previous year’s winner. 0/10

🇷🇸 Serbia: Konstrakta – In Corpore Sano

I like the lyrics. Konstrakta is such a mood. I think it’ll grow on me. 6/10

🇸🇮 Slovenia: LPS – Disko

For a song named Disko, it’s not very catchy. The singer is cute though. Idk maybe this will grow on me too. 4/10

🇪🇸 Spain: Chanel – SloMo

It feels weird listening to a real Spanish speaker singing Latin Urban after so many Cyprian entries,lol. Not my cup of tea but she’s hot. 3/10

🇸🇪 Sweden: Cornelia Jakobs – Hold Me Closer

BORIIIIIINGGGGGGGGG. 2/10

🇨🇭 Switzerland: Marius Bear – Boys Do Cry

Indie boy. Ugly song. 0/10

🇺🇦 Ukraine: Kalush Orchestra – Stefania

WINNER. I know there will be a lot of pity votes but Ukraine really deserves a win. The song is so good it makes me cry. The contemporary vibes mixed with traditional Ukrainian music, their clothes, the band themselves, just beautiful. 10/10

🇬🇧 United Kingdom: Sam Ryder – SPACE MAN

Well. UK. 0/10

[popblank]

Eurovision Semifinal 2

Hmm basket of kittens. Anyway, tonight I'm rooting for Serbia, Sweden, Czech Republic.

The hosts are dressed as the flag of Germany.

Finland, The Rasmus, "Jezebel" – Very restrained start. Oh wait. Never mind, that's just how he sings.

Israel, Michael Ben David, "I.M" – Plenty of attitude. The runway effect is clear. Lighting seems a bit dark? Fun dance break. A little exhausting.

Serbia, Konstrakta, "In Corpore Sano" – Onscreen lyrics look oddly like closed captioning, but I think it works for this song because it’s sort of jarring and makes you question what is going on. Loved hearing the entire audience clap along. The beat and her voice are relentless and mesmerizing.

Azerbaijan, Nadir Rustamli, "Fade to Black" – Honestly, I'm still hearing “in corpore sano, in corpore sano” echoing in my mind. It's very competent but after Israel and Serbia it seems to lack personality.

Georgia, Circus Mircus, "Lock Me In" – They're a band, but weird. I do like that one shifty eye that keeps showing up, as well as turning the stage into a giant creepy face. With all the strangeness and odd projections swirling around the stage, the band themselves stayed relatively static.  It makes the performance feel like controlled (not chaotic) madness.

Malta, Emma Muscat, "I Am What I Am" – Unexpectedly wobbly on the vocals.  I wonder if all the climbing up and down and running around was an issue?   It seemed a bit too choreographed and her notes were consistently going a bit flat.

San Marino, Achille Lauro, "Stripper" – The sparkly bodysuit suits him. The mechanical bull is an interesting stage prop but ultimately less interesting than watching him walk around.

Mika somehow sounds very natural trying to fill time while still calling a lot of attention to exactly what he is doing.  

Australia, Sheldon Riley, "Not The Same" – The lighting is full of drama.  He has a very good voice and I enjoyed the staging but when he starts repeating "not the same" I kind of tune out. 

Cyprus, Andromache, "Ela" – A performance that makes good use of the water feature.  Again vocally wobbly and only partly on purpose I think. The last note was not bad sounding, yet quite off.

Ireland, Brooke, "That's Rich" – Did the intro graphic get lost?  Actually found her postcard moderately interesting through sheer personality. Improved in every aspect compared to the national final. The song has been growing on me.

North Macedonia, Andrea, "Circles" – I was worried that the low notes would be an issue, but she's got the singing down and is very passionate. This presentation uses the side panels, which so far have not looked particularly well-integrated into the visuals when they have been noticeable. I wonder what the intent of having those was in the stage design. I’m not that into the song, but good performance.

Estonia, Stefan, "Hope" – This reminds me of Victor Crone, though I would give Stefan the edge in song, singing, and styling.

Wonder what’s going on that made the audience cheer while Mika did this "sound of beauty" interlude?

Romania, WRS, "Llámame" – Dancing is much more confident than it was at the national final.  Still no attempt at telling the story implied in the song.

Poland, Ochman, "River" – The drippy TV graphics are distracting, and the earthquake and lightning graphics even more so. I read it as awkward attempt to dress up a song that is more voice than substance.

Montenegro, Vladana, "Breathe" – What was the random audience shot? Was it meant to be focused on her the whole time?  Judging from the bit at the end, I think I might have enjoyed this song more when I didn't understand the lyrics.

Belgium, Jérémie Makiese, "Miss You" – Oddly breathless in places. He sounds good, but often seems to be singing to himself more than singing to a live or TV audience.

Sweden, Cornelia Jakobs, "Hold Me Closer" – Her green circle looks very nice today.  Is the audience singing along or am I imagining it?  Holy crap that light effect going into the last chorus. Lovely silhouette shot at the end. That was really good. Just a few staging changes from Melodifestivalen, which worked really well. Clear thought and intent in the camera work; they even managed to create an illusion of her interacting with the audience despite the actual distance that is obvious in subsequent shots.

Czech Republic, We Are Domi, "Lights Off" – Lights, lights everywhere.  That was a striking glory note camera shot with the arena behind her.  That glimpse of her expression afterward was like "Hell yeah!" Good way to close out.

Michael Ben David in his monochrome outfit fits in well standing with the hosts.

Was wondering who would bring the Ukrainian flags today; that it was Georgia is not a huge surprise.

Why are they singing "People Have the Power"?  

Hey, is the "sun" moving very slowly during "Grande Amore"? It is. Is that one ring supposed to be in that position? Unclear.

The contrast between "I'm going to go eat pasta carbonara" Chanel and "booty hypnotic" Chanel is startling.

The countries I was rooting for made the final, though I would have liked for Georgia and Ireland to go through as well. 

Even so, my entire top ten (in fact my top 11) are in the final. This is such an odd feeling; I have been watching Eurovision since 2007 and this has never happened.

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision (#34)

34. BELGIUM Jérémie Makiese - “Miss you” 19th place

Decade rank: 69/79 [Above Efendi, below Undisclosed]

Lol remember that scene from Borat where Sasha Baron Cohen attempts to kidnap Pamela Anderson and yells “PAMELA I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!! NAWT!!!!! 😭” while being carried away by her bodyguards? That has always been the first thing I think about whenever I hear "Miss you”. 

Given how anonymous “Miss you” is, it’s almost impressive that it foremost manages to be really fucking annoying to me. Moreover, its brand of “annoying” has *layers*, like a trifle of tepid tedium.

At the core of this Ennui Onion we have the insipid attempt to tell an “I’M FINE I’M FINE I’M FIIIIIIIIIIINE” post-break up storyline through inane “well sometimes i feel sad, but other times I feel just fine I guess 🤷‍♀️” verses. Is Jérémie over this break-up and just pretending to be sad because that’s what’s expected of him, or is he deeply disturbed and Playing It Cool For Appearances? The answer to that is “five televote points, find someone who cares”.

Belgium then further doubled down on their irritatingly pointless story of "Jérémie is fine except for when he isn’t” by making his song pointlessly irritating. Oh WHOA, a Bond Theme opening from Belgium? No way?! A clumsy and forced RnB transition to simulate emotional growth where there is none? So novel! How do we improve that? Why, by sprinkling in some next-level screaming, of course!

The FUCKING screaming oh Qod that’s the worst bit of it all. You have singing, then the vocal show-offery that Anja Nissen and Sheldon Riley are infamous for (but again, belting is FINE, just don’t make it... your main stratagem); and right at the bottom there’s Jérémie squealing fucking NOT-jokes, complete with Unfortunate Singing Face, yes, let’s not ignore the main televote killer in this equation. Jérémie’s emotional range is as hot or cold according to what the shitty narrative requires it to be, which is not how real people emote!  Whoever came up with this song as much understanding of natural progression as Michael Ben David has of consent.

So, it’s almost funny that the entire narrative I just described got fucking nixed in the live staging which chose to solely (SOLELY!) focus on the rhythm instead? I mean, I approve, cuz Melody > Message AND the dancers were pretty talented, but that makes the whole song feel even more pointless and irritating. Why even have this at all! Why not just make a fun RnB song instead that actually COULD have gotten a few more televotes? Gaaaaaaghfgiigfrger!g!

Also, the ballad portion of the song was staged well, and then dancers come on and so do the copious wideshots. Is this yet another example of Belgian staging falling apart due to shitty music or another example of RAI’s fucking incompetence, take your pick. Still, Why doesn’t Jérémie dance along more vibrantly? Why doesn’t he dance along, PERIOD? What’s the point of adding some kick-ass krumping if you’re not going ot use it efficiently? Did Eliot and Sennek really die so Belgium could NOT learn from their past mistakes?!?

All of this amounts to ::checks wiki:: 19th place, a second bottom five televote result with the audience in a row, and a generic Voice Winner’s First Radio Hit, that will also be his only hit ever. I hope you’ve enjoyed by this irritatingly long write-up about this pointless fucking song!

THE RANKING

34. BELGIUM - Jérémie Makiese - “Miss you” 35. NORWAY - Subwoolfer - “Give that wolf a banana” 36. AUSTRALIA - Sheldon Riley - “Not the same” 37. SWITZERLAND - Marius Bear - “Boys do cry” 38. AZERBAIJAN - Nadir Rustamli - “Fade to black” 39. ITALY - Mahmood & Blanco - “Brividi” 40. ISRAEL - Michael Ben David - “I.M”

Lol we advance into the yellow tier with a live that was somehow worse than Omaga’s <3   What a great year. 

[ragazza-paradiso]

so, semi final 2, i am very nervous and think my heart will break a little more than tuesday night

here’s my ranking, anyhow

18. 🇮🇱 “I.M” by Michael Ben David: i dislike this song immensely, and what i’ve seen and heard from the act himself in the past few days makes me dislike him personally too!

17. 🇦🇺 “Not the Same” by Sheldon Riley: it’s a nice message but it comes across a bit pretentious to me and annoying i’m not gonna lie

16. 🇲🇹 “I Am Who I Am” by Emma Muscat: this actually pains me so much bc i love emma but this song is just not good, she should’ve stuck with “Out Of Sight” at least that was a decent pop song

15. 🇫🇮 “Jezebel” by The Rasmus: i like the melody but the lyrics are just so bad i cannot get into this song. his vocals also don’t sound very good. sorry :/

14. 🇧🇪 “Miss You” by Jérémie Makiese: the studio cut is nice (although nothing spectacular) and i thought they would stage it very well, but looks like that’s not the case. apparently he missed the big note quite badly in the jury show. don’t have big hopes for this one

13. 🇬🇪 “Lock Me In” by Circus Mircus: i do like the studio cut but it gets a little repetitive and they didn’t give it the life on stage i was hoping for :(

12. 🇲🇰 “Circles” by Andrea: it’s a nice song and she sings it well, it’s just a little forgettable for me. they really gave her nothing to work with staging-wise, either

11. 🇵🇱 “River” by Ochman: i liked this song at first, but again it’s very repetitive and i’ve grown off it over time. his voice is crazy good though. not a fan of the windows movie maker effects though lol

10. 🇪🇪 “Hope” by Stefan: i looooove the studio track of this song, and i wish we could’ve seen what they would’ve done with this had the stage been working correctly, but alas, we’re left with a giant black hole and it’s just not perfect for me like i wanted it to be. still, sing your heart out boy <3

9. 🇦🇿 “Fade to Black” by Nadir Rustamli: the song isn’t great by itself, but they’ve really elevated it with the staging. he has maybe the best male voice this year in my opinion, he sounds just like the studio cut.

8. 🇷🇴 “Llámame” by wrs: the revamped version of this is great, and they bring so much life on stage. i’m really worried about how the juries will react to this but i hope he gets enough love to qualify

7. 🇮🇪 “That’s Rich” by Brooke: this is so good 😭 i’m so proud of ireland for once and i really need to see her serving in the final too. girlie deserves it

6. 🇲🇪 “Breathe” by Vladana: another big grower for me this year, the lyrics might not flow that well, but you can get the overall message, and the beautiful instrumental only enhances that for me, plus she looks gorgeous on stage.

5. 🇨🇾 “Ela” by Andromache: i love this song, it’s so enchanting and magical, and i like the staging concept they’ve used. she’s a fantastic singer, and i like that cyprus is incorporating ethnic elements and the greek language into their songs again. i think they’ll keep their qualification streak (apart from ukraine & sweden i think that’ll make them the country with the longest one? assuming israel NQs. pretty cool for such a small country!)

4. 🇸🇲 “Stripper” by Achille Lauro: speaking of qualification streaks! the smallest country in the contest shall hopefully have a 3 year one! this is just, so good. achille is a born performer and he has put on a show for europe.

3. 🇨🇿 “Lights Off” by We Are Domi: i love this as a show closer! so much energy, i love dominika and the light show for this looks so cool!

2. 🇸🇪 “Hold Me Closer” by Cornelia Jakobs: i know she’s had technical problems (here’s hoping she won’t tonight) but this is just the whole package, amazing song, amazing staging, amazing voice. i really hope everything falls into place tonight

1. 🇷🇸 “In Corpore Sano” by Konstrakta: who else would be my number one, lol? i’ve already repeated myself ad infinitum about this song, this is my fave of the whole contest. she is simply a queen.