Whoops I slipped and kept writing!
Following are some general tags/warnings so you can better judge if you want to read my stuff.
Tags: Astarion x Tav (Rowan, not reader, human, agender AFAB but lets the team refer to them as female), Canon x OC, Isekai, Angst, All the Vampirism Warnings (Blood, Biting, etc.), Sexually suggestive situations, Allusion to/Mention of Suicide, Memory loss, Gender Dysphoria
Astarion came back from his hunt early enough that everyone was either still sleeping or just getting ready, but late enough that Rowan was already halfway through making breakfast for the normal people in camp.
He thought about sneaking into his tent before she noticed him or pretending that there was nothing to talk about. She turned, briefly looked him in the eye, and went on with what she was doing. Her eyes were dark and dull, her movements conservative. No one was confronting him with torches and pitchforks, so it was unlikely she'd told anyone yet, but how long would that last? Astarion decided to join her at the little table she’d made into her kitchen.
“I suppose that we should talk about last night,” he said quietly, with a practiced glaze of charm to his words.
“I’d rather we didn't, if it's all the same to you,” Rowan answered leadenly. She kept her eyes on her work.
“Well, there are some practical issues that we should discuss.”
“I won’t tell anyone-” she started.
“That’s good to hear,” Astarion interrupted, relief sloping his shoulders.
“-and you’ll have to wait a few days before you do it again, so I don’t pass out with this knife in my hand,” she finished, carefully cutting a potato into precise cubes. Astarion stared in disbelief.
“I’m sorry, I thought I heard you say” he leaned in closely so that only she could hear him “that you want to do that again?”
“My job is feeding you people. I can't exactly make you a salad.”
“And you’re okay with that? Being food?” He asked incredulously.
“Makes the most sense,” Rowan answered flippantly.
“So we’re not going to discuss the whole ‘you asking me to kill you’ of it all?” Astarion asked, rotating his hand through the air to follow his tone.
“I’d rather we didn't.”
Astarion threw his hands into the air at about shoulder height with a disarming smile on his face. “Well, I guess that about covers it.”
Astarion liked to pretend that things didn't bother him. He got a meal, she got protection. It was a rather simple exchange. Rowan couldn't squash him like the others. He could make her completely dependent on him, like his own little spawn. Spawn. He liked teasing her with that word. Eventually she stopped scolding him, it was still fun to watch her squirm, but it made him a little sad when she didn't react at all.
He got jealous when she got along with the others. Karlach took a shine to her, an almost big-sister type of protectiveness. They would sometimes do a little dance together, the only source of genuine happiness that Rowan seemed to have. She listened to Wyll’s stories with sincere interest and soaked up Gale’s knowledge like a flower standing out in the sun. Astarion couldn't understand how she could bear it. Probably something to do with her soft and compliant nature. Perhaps, in addition to the meals, mending, and washing, it was her own way of securing protection from them.
Lae’zel did not take kindly to Rowan, and made her opinions known on several occasions.
“T’chk! Someone like her should have been crushed in the egg,” the gith had remarked in annoyance after Shadowheart voiced concern that Rowan still seemed tired and out-of-sorts after several rounds of minor healing.
At first, Astarion thought it was his own special meals that Rowan was providing every couple of days, but that didn't seem to be the case. The woman functioned perfectly fine, but the life appeared to slowly drain out of her. She even stopped reacting to Lae’zel’s threats to put a sword through her heart, either because of her uselessness or illithid potential.
Astarion didn't know why he got a little jealous of the others, or why he felt a surge of protectiveness when Lae’zel decided to revisit her distaste for the human. She wasn't particularly pretty, he wouldn't have noticed her, and while she didn't strike him as dull, she didn't exactly provide deep conversation. As much as the others annoyed him from time-to-time, they were very interesting and had their own unique looks and quirks. Rowan was more like an automaton than a person these days.
But even still, he gravitated toward her sometimes. Rowan’s blood in his veins made her stand out. He could've easily found her in a mass of unwashed peasants. When they sat around the campfire, her heartbeat rang above the rest. At night, with his fangs in her soft neck, it filled his head. It was always so fast, her breath shallow and strained like frightened prey. With his body above hers, it slowed. It slowed when Gale would go on some long tangent about magic or ancient cultures. It slowed when Karlach got excited about something or Shadowheart would touch her arm in concern. It actually slowed when Lae'zel would talk about her imminent death.
Astarion could hear it now, thrumming along, as she washed Gale’s leisure clothes. Rowan was singing to herself under her breath, something he didn’t recognize. They all wondered where she was from; she asked questions with obvious answers and treated everything like she’d just seen it for the first time. Maybe the tadpole was scrambling her brains the worst.
Did that mean it was cruel to tease her? Most likely. But it was fun. The harder it became to get a rise out of her, the more fun he had.
So when Astarion saw her there, gently working the dirt and sweat out of that purple monstrosity Gale insisted on wearing, he simply had no choice but to be annoying.
“I could think of a few activities more exciting than that, darling.” It used to be that Rowan would roll her eyes at the word ‘darling,’ but it now rolled off her without acknowledgement. He pressed his fingertips to his chest and leaned in as he continued. “Shadowheart says you’re too stressed. I have the perfect remedy. You’ll forget the past few weeks have even happened!”
Rowan got to her feet, and he almost expected her to respond, but she simply went to hang Gale’s shirt to dry. Astarion laughed playfully as he prepared the latest addition to his arsenal of teases.
“You know, whoever owns the left side of your neck has probably moved on already. They do that, you know. Great loves? They find a way to disappoint.” Rowan ignored him, focusing her attention on the seams and embroidery of the shirt, looking for anything that needed to be fixed. He sidled up behind her, practically pressing himself against her back. His mouth hovered inches above the left side of her neck, and his hand ghosted over her waist, not out of hesitation, but as just another layer of tease.
“Besides, no one could compare to me,” he said low and sultry in her ear, his cold breath ruffling the wisps of hair at the base of her neck. “Everything I have to offer could be yours, if only you’d forget about him.”
The time between his last word and Astarion finding himself in the dirt on his ass flashed faster than he thought possible. Stunned, he was for once speechless. Rowan glared down at him, her blue eyes impossibly icy and hard. Dangerously calm and commanding, she simply said, “Stop.”
Astarion gaped, trying to formulate a response, but this exact scenario hadn’t exactly occurred to him when rehearsing it. He could hear the strain in her body, like a bowstring about to snap.
Rowan didn’t argue further. She closed her eyes and took in a shaking breath that she held. When she let it out, her body relaxed but the strain remained in her chest. Without opening her eyes, she turned to the clothes on her drying line. Astarion took this opportunity to flee.
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