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samanthaa-leanne · 4 years

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Sam, hon, are you taking requests? Because if you do can I ask for Bakugou, Todoroki, Shinsou and Denki dealing with a s/o that has frequent panic attacks?

Wow, it’s been a hot minute since I’ve actually written anything. Sorry, it’s taken me so long guys. I just haven’t had any motivation in a while, to be honest with you. But I am hoping to get some much-needed writing done this weekend.

Anywho, thank you love for requesting this. I hope you like it.

Please reblog, like, comment if you enjoyed it! I love hearing from you guys. It’s important for us to share each others work and show other people how many amazing writers there are out there, so please reblog if you like my work.

If you would like to be added to my taglists please click the link here and click the according link.

Bakugou:

You had been dating Bakugou for a few months now and you couldn’t be happier.

His hot-headed personality complimented your own personality well.

All of your friends kept telling you how perfect you were for each other, and you couldn’t help but agree.

All in all, your relationship was as perfect as it could get with a significant other like Bakugou.

You guys had your arguments (what couple didn’t?), but it never lasted long. Once the anger wore off, you both found yourself wanting the others company more than you wanted to be right about some silly argument.

One day as you were walking back to the dorms with Bakugou, you heard some girls gossiping about you, and you felt your first panic attack in months creep up.

“What does he even see in them?” One of the girls whispered just loud enough for you to hear.

“He could do so much better. Maybe it’s just a temporary thing. There’s no way he could ever love someone like that.”

Your heart constricted at their words. Your palms became slick with sweat, and your breathing became uneven. You stopped in your tracks and brought your hands to your head as you closed your eyes and tried to control your breathing.

You heard the confusion and worry in your boyfriend’s words as he looked at you, trying to determine what was going on, but you were too focused on trying to calm your breathing to answer him.

After a few minutes of drowning out the outside world to calm yourself down, you felt yourself finally coming out of it.

When you finally looked up and made contact with your boyfriend, you were surprised by the look of worry that was on his face.

He found himself being incredibly gentle with you as he put his hands on either side of your face.

“Are you okay?” He whispered as his thumbs brushed over your cheeks.

You didn’t trust your voice, so you nodded, never taking your eyes off his.

“What happened?” He asked, his voice laced with worry.

“I, uh, had a panic attack. I haven’t had one in a while, but they’re pretty frequent for me.” You answered honestly as you watched his face for his reaction.

He nodded in understanding as he pulled you close to his chest. Your hands wrapped around his waist as he held you tightly.

Once he got in his room, he researched everything he could about panic attacks and any time you had one knew exactly what to do to help you get through it.

And after he got kidnapped and started having his own panic attacks, you were the only person he trusted enough to help him through them.

You became a safe haven for one another, always dropping everything when you needed the other.

Todoroki:

You had only been dating for a few weeks when you had your first panic attack in front of him.

He had been telling you the story of how he got his scar when your own past childhood traumatic experiences flooded your mind.

You felt your breath hitch in your throat, and your whole body began to shake.

You slammed your eyes shut as you tried to block out the imaged that placated your mind.

Shoto knew exactly what was going on, but he didn’t know how to help you through it.

He knew when he used to get them that he had to work through it himself, so he just watched you and made sure he was ready to embrace you once you came out of it.

You took several deep breaths to calm yourself down before opening your eyes and came face to face with his heterochromatic ones.

You let out a shaky chuckle and brought your hands up to cover your face.

“I’m sorry Sho.” You whispered as your face burned red.

He gently peeled your hands off your face, and you were stunned to see the most loving expression on his face as he gently shook his head at you.

“You don’t ever need to apologize to me for being you. Your panic attacks are apart of who you are, and I will always be here to help you through them as best as possible. Just tell me what you need me to do to help you for next time, ok?” He said with a small smile as he placed a little kiss to your lips.

You couldn’t stop the tears that fell down your cheeks as you pulled him into your chest, hugging him tightly. “Thank you Sho.” You whispered as he wrapped his arms around you and rubbed soothing circles in your back.

Shinsou:

You had been having panic attacks since you were a child, and many of them stemmed from getting bullied as a kid.

You were bullied for numerous reasons, and if it wasn’t one thing than it was another.

You had a “weak” quirk. Your hair was weird. You were a loner. You were ugly. The insults were continually changing.

Kids were just mean, and it wasn’t long before your first panic attack happened.

Which only made the bullying intensify. You were now the weird kid who freaked out over some slight “teasing.”

Your panic attacks became a frequent occurrence, having at least three to four a week.

Once you got into UA, the number went down some, and once you started dating Shinsou it was only happening about once or twice a week.

You were upfront with him from the beginning of your relationship. You were telling him about your past trauma and how it had affected you still to this day.

Shinsou knew exactly what you were talking about, especially considering how he used to be bullied because of his quirk.

He instantly asked what he could do to help you get through it, so he was prepared for when you had one.

He was needed only a few hours after that conversation, as one crept up on you on your walk home.

Shinsou noticed the way your breathing sped up and how your body started to shake. You clutched onto his arm as a wave of dizziness hit you like a truck.

Shinsou gently pulled you away from the sidewalk and onto a nearby bench as he tried to help you calm your breathing down.

“Try and follow my breathing, kitten. Take a deep breath. Perfect. Hold it. Now exhale. Just like that. You’re doing so good.” He encouraged as his hand started to rub soothing circles in your back.

The panic attack came and gone, and you practically fell against Shinsou’s side as his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you close to him. You buried your head in his chest as his hand came to stroke your hair.

“Thank you Toshi.” You whispered as he placed a soft kiss to your head.

“Anytime, kitten.” He answered back as he kept you in his arms for a little while longer. Neither one of you ready to get up from your spot yet.

Denki:

You had miraculously been dating Denki for close to a year now.

The eccentric boy stole your heart after one glance.

You were both madly in love with each other, flaws, and all.

When you first started dating, you sat him down and explained that you had frequent panic attacks. You didn’t know what caused them, only that you had them.

He listened intently and nodded his head in understanding, but to be honest with you, he had no idea what you were talking about until he went home and looked it up on Google.

The first time you had one he was ready to give you a helping hand. He had looked up the symptoms and how to help someone through it, and still, to this day, you were surprised at his actions.

You were just sitting in bed with him as a movie played in the background. A scene came on the screen, and the next thing you knew, your body started to shiver with a new onset of chills, and your breathing became erratic.

It took him a few seconds to know what was going on, but once the light bulb went off in his brain, he went right into helpful boyfriend mode and asked exactly what you needed him to do to help.

“Distract me, please.” You managed to get out as you looked at him with wide eyes.

“Uhm, okay... Let’s see. A distraction... Ok!” He yelled as he suddenly got up from the bed and ran to his mom’s bathroom as you tried to calm your breathing down.

He came back in and had painted little lightning bolts on his cheeks as he charged up and yelled, “PIKA PIKA, PIKACHU.”

Your breathing had slowed down to an average pace as you let out the laugh that you had been holding. You laughed so hard that tears started to fall down your cheeks, and your boyfriend couldn’t help but laugh with you as he sat back down beside you.

“Kami baby, what was that?” You asked between laughs as you wiped a stray tear away.

“It was all I could think of.” He answered honestly as he watched your body shake with laughter, the smile on your face easily the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

You leaned over and placed a sweet kiss on his lips before cuddling into his side as you turned your attention back to the movie.

Denki wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you closer to him, and he watched you watch the movie. His eyes were hoping to catch one more glimpse of the smile he loved so dearly.

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jidai · 3 years

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jidai’s budget mutuals/friends appreciation

Hi, all! I’m quite late with this but I decided to put a small friends and mutual appreciations post in hopes of brightening up the end of this year a little bit. ❤️ If you were tagged, please make sure to check below for a small little message from me. However, I want to make it very clear that I truly appreciate all of my mutuals. You guys brighten up my dash and always reblog or create so many funny and creative posts. I just wanted to give a few special shout outs to those that have taken out the time to reach out and interacted with me past my ask box or we just see each other often.

The messages are ordered by your URL, so you might have to scroll for awhile before you see your messages. I’m so sorry lmao.

Happy New Years, everyone!

@25th, Nonnie, the Young Genius. bro, remind me how old you are 🧍‍♀️ Like my brain CANNOT fathom the thought that you’re so skilled at SO many things and you’re not even in your twenties??? PLEASE SPARE THE TALENT. i will even accept crumbs. But I’m writing to tell you that you are such a wonderful presence on my dash. I always look forward to your gfx. They’re so SO good and you’re improving from one post to another. Like WOW. Now, you’re even starting an art blog, too? You’re so dedicated to the arts. I respect that a lot. Your hard work and commitment will bring you very far in life, whatever you decide to do.

I love interacting with you. You’re such a big sweetheart and full of positivity and energy. I look forward to seeing more of your art and gfx ❤️

@biscuitwalk, Dann, the AK Wiz. Dann, I know you’re not as active on here so idk when or if you will ever read this but I want to say that I miss you and your creations so, so much. I will say it a hundred times over and OVER but you inspire me so goddamn much. You have no fucking idea. Your works are absolutely gorgeous and unique. I can look at it once and I can instantly recognize your style (and your cute lil’ pufferfish <3). The way you utilize colors and implement various techniques, shapes, textures into your work. Goddamn, you’re so good. I always look to your work if I ever need inspiration and they help me brainstorm. God, I wish I could put it into words how much I adore your works.

We didn’t really talk for long but you seemed like such a kind and fun person to be around. I wish you the best in your future endeavors, wherever you are. Stay safe <3

@elriccs, Mirai, the Short King. 🧍‍♀️ ok look I know, I know I’m TERRIBLE at replying to you and I’m so fucking sorry. I absolutely love to talk to you but my dumbass cannot seem to reply in a timely manner LASELKSAL. That’s on me and I gotta do better. Anyways!!! Thank you SO fucking much for always leaving such kind messages on my work. I swear to god you’re one of my biggest hype man and I ALWAYS look forward to reading your tags. They’re so funny and it makes me all tingly and happy inside. Bro, like, you just radiate big fun vibes, bro. I really hope that I can get to know you better so I can just insult you until it’s too late to walk away </3

And of course, let me also remind you that I love your works so much. They way that you utilize your textures and those muted colors... OOMPH *chefs kiss* I will always love--

@lockhvrts, Em the Soulsborne GOD. hi em 🥺 it’s been awhile since I’ve had a proper conversation with you and I hope you’re doing okay! I miss you and our conversations where we do nothing but geek out and complain about the game industry lmao. if you manage to read this, I just wanted to let you know I miss your presence here. It’s been kinda dull not seeing your beautiful soulsborne gifs and your game rants. Let’s catch up soon. <3 stay safe and well!

@nathanprescutt, Benn, the Man. BENNNNNNNN. I love you a lot bro. I know we haven’t had long conversations for some time and I hope I can change that! You were my first friend on this blog and I will always appreciate it. I remember us just geeking out over your works and how I would always send you a gfx request like once a week LMAO. The one thing that I have always appreciated about you was the fact that you’re very opinionated (if not, very vocal on your stance on things) and you hold your ground. There were a few time where you encouraged me to speak on topics that I think I shouldn’t and that stuck with me for quite awhile. I’m still a nervous rambling mess when it comes to debates but just know that the one time you supported me to voice my opinion--I hold it very dear to my heart.

While I don’t spend much time together, I will always remember our animal crossing session. It was so much fun just trashing and chilling on your island. Especially the bar :( that bar was fucking AMAZING. Maybe once FFXVI comes out, we can geek out hehe

Also, thank you so much for sending in photos of all your doggos, omg. I miss seeing them so much I hope they’re doing well. Stay hot, my German bro lol. Ich bin sehr dankbar, so eine tolle Freundin zu haben. ❤️❤️❤️

@noxdivina, Lin the Big Dick Daddy Kind. The church is open for business bitch and I’m here to preach the GOSPEL.

Okay, jokes aside, I’m really happy that we became mutuals. You’ve always give off this like, mysterious cosmic vibe (????? huh). And your selfies just further proves that you are wtf. But you’re always so kind to those that you interact with. You’re an absolutely sweetheart and like I just want to give you a giant hug every time we interact. You’re such a soft human being. It’s so nice being around you. It’s like being tossed in the oven and baked at 250 degrees F for 25 minutes. And to boot you’re really talented, hello? God really said let there be a perfect human being and yeeted you into the universe. Thank you for always leaving such kind messages and words in my DM/askbox/works. I cherish them so much. I hope I can get to know you better in the future bc you’re rad, bro <3

anyways, updated drawing of u and maya:

i always assume you’re in a black fur parka 24/7 and maya is coatless neck down. also deck me with those jacked arms of yours thanks 🧍‍♀️

(edit: fuck i forgot to draw a PARTY HAT ON MAYA IM SORRY)

@rokuseis, Sei, the Dumber.

i have nothing to say to you go away you banana hater ASELKSAEKL

BITCH, you doo bee getting on my nerve 24/7/365 🧍‍♀️ you were an unexpected but a very welcomed addition to my life. I can’t believe we really went 1 fuckin’ year without speaking to each other and then suddenly our friendship blew up because over a stupid BANANA. Now you gotta deal with me and my stupid, random, crude ass messages daily. I cannot. Clown to clown communication. But thank you so much bitch for being there for me and telling all of these funny ass stories and life experiences.

I know I don’t say it a lot because when we talk it’s literally just dogs barking at each other but I want to make it clear now: I love your humor and vibe so much. You never fail to make me laugh anytime I talk to you and I appreciate it so much. I can’t tell you how many times I felt better after talking to you. Even though sometimes your fucking jab hits hard and I end up actually inSULTED BY IT. But thank you for becoming my friend and I look forward to all of our stupid moments together. Looking forward to shitting in your sink when I finally fly to your home <3

@wolfamongthem, Anna, the Grinch. Please don’t hurt me for that title. I'm just saying if someone needs a live casting, it’ll be u. Anyways, did you know that I was so fucking intimidated by you for a long ass time, even before we became mutuals aseljas LMAO. I always see your gifs around on explore and they’re so gorgeous and then I look at your text posts and it’s u roasting people like there’s no tomorrow- 🧍‍♀️ bitch I was SCARED OF U KSKS. Now that I’ve talked to you a few times, you’re really funny like where do you find those reaction memes????? Like bro you and your shitposts is my morning cup of coffee.

Anyways, in 2021 I expect a full-fledge review of all AAA games from you-- no more shit talking in the tags let it all out BITCH. Thank you for being such a great mutual! I look forward to see what weird shit you will send me the next time we talk lmao

@zenien, Selm, the I’m-gay-for-Lady-Maria-or-anything-that-moves-in-BB-Bitch™. ok bitch if I’m being honest I wrote yours last so my brain is FRIED. so everything i say from here is raw from the HEARt cause that’s all I got left. But anyhow, we savin’ the best for last! honestly, i didn’t expect you to barge into my life like that. i really didn’t. i was just gonna keep admiring with my 7 feet (2.1336 meters) pole. I’m glad you made the first move because look where we are wtf 🧍‍♀️ friends??? I wouldn’t believe you if you told me that in 2014 when I first followed you lmao.

You’re such a kind soul. I know you may disagree but I’m determined to convince you. I can’t tell you how much I want to thank you for taking the time to talk to me during my rough bits. It’s like sitting on a wooden bench in a park during sunset and you sit next to me, just enjoying the vast sky. You radiate such peaceful energy. It’s very calming. Or you know, 2 seconds later i’m suddenly suplexed by your 40 tons of insults like what--

Thank you for everything, so far. Truly. It’s been so fun listening to you talk about your Bloodborne journey and see your reactions live. It’s been so fun to see you post your graphics and it continues to blow me away. It’s been so fun hearing about your life and the stories of your adulthood. Every words that we have exchanged, I hold dearly to my heart--more than you ever know. Love u bitch.

#for mutuals #mutuals don't ask about your titles i was being quirky LMAO #this took so long so i hope it works properly sksks #it hasn't been proofread so enjoy the mess

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wewillwriteyou · 5 years

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Friends Will Be Friends || Chapter 21

Bohemian Rhapsody

A few elements from the main plot: A very special group of friends: early days, drama, laughter, booze, success, rock stars life, girl power, friendship, love, sex, music, misunderstandings, some more drama, family. Pairings in the tags

Summary Chapter 21: Freddie has an idea for a song. Melissa confides in Chrissie for a very big secret.

Word count: 2.9K

Warnings: Other than the occasional curse word? None. This is mainly FLUFF. If you really squint, there’s a teeny tiny scene of smut, but that’s it.

A/N: Hey folks! Hope you’re still alive after the last chapter lol. This is definitely different and we kinda experimented with something here. You’ll see what we’re talking about 😏 Hope you enjoy yourselves, lovesies 💖 and as usual, if you like what you read, comment, like, reblog and share this with others! For everyone who follows and supports this story, thank you guys (you know who you are)! You are real stars!⭐💗

It had been over a week since they had arrived at the farm and Freddie was a literal ball of energy, inspired as ever, trying to get everyone as excited as him about writing new songs and taking long walks in the countryside and, of course, playing Scrabble at any given occasion.

On that afternoon things were going as usual, the girls lounging around the house or in the garden and the boys scattered through the mansion, every each of them looking for inspiration. Freddie was actually on a sunbed in the garden, rigorously under a wide beach umbrella to protect his skin from the beating sun of three o'clock in the afternoon. Mary and Chrissie were by his side lounging under the sun, while Melissa was sharing the parasol with him.

He was humming a tune to himself, sure that no-one was paying attention; Melissa lifted her head "That's pretty good Fred… what's the lyrics?"

He glanced at her "I haven't figured out the whole lyric yet, I just jotted down some sentences that were rolling inside my head… I don’t even think they’re logically linked…" he glimpsed back at the paper he was writing on and then fixed his eyes back on hers "Would you mind reading it?"

"Sure Fred" she shifted in her seat, rolling on her side.

He handed her the paper and as her eyes followed the words on the paper she brought a hand to her mouth.

Mama, life had just begun,

But now I've gone and thrown it all away.

Mama, if I'm not back again this time tomorrow,

Carry on, as if nothing matters.

Too late, my time has come,

Goodbye, everybody, I've got to go,

Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth.

Mama, ooh,

I don't wanna die,

I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all.

Melissa felt her eyes watering "Fred this is heartbreaking…"

He looked down “Yeah, I wasn't sure of it anyway" he reached out to grab the sheet but Mel pulled it away

"I meant it's beautiful, honey" she fondly smiled and heard her voice cracking “I’m actually speechless, Fred, you’re so talented”

Freddie smiled back and placed a hand on her cheek, wiping a tear that had slipped from her lashes "I didn't mean to make you cry, darling"

Melissa shook her head "You didn't Fred, it’s just-” Melissa pondered the words she was about to say “-it’s really moving and it made me emotional…” she decided to say at last.

Freddie smiled widely at her and blushed a little “Well, thanks, Mel. I don’t know how I come up with these things… sometimes I feel like my heart is trying to tell me something and my mind can’t process it properly, so it just… puts it into lyrics…” he scraped the back of his neck with his hand, his cheeks flushing red for the sudden confession.

Melissa smiled and placed a hand on his knee “That’s amazing, darling,” she rubbed her thumb as a way of reassuring him “I’m not kidding when I say you have a special gift. You are so talented, Fred…”

He kindly smiled and brushed a hand on her cheek “Thank you, dear”

“Do you already know the melody?” she asked.

Freddie exhaled and took some courage “I’m not sure, but in my head, it goes something like this” he hummed the melody and Melissa felt literally captured by it.

“That’s beautiful, love” Mary from behind Freddie’s shoulders made her way into the conversation, her voice still sleepy and croaking.

Freddie turned around to place a kiss on her forehead “Thanks, my love”

Chrissie had woken up too “Yeah, Freddie, it’s wonderful,” she said, “do you already know the title?”

Freddie shook his head “I don’t, actually. You see? In my head, I have at least three songs twisting and twirling at the moment, and I don’t know which is called what and what is the melody to each of them because they all mix and match…” he sighed “It’s all just confusion and desperation in here” he knocked on his head, making Mary and Chrissie laugh.

Melissa chuckled along. She was sitting on the sunbed and suddenly she realized the voices of her friends were beginning to feel distant and her sight was dimming.

She barely saw Chrissie getting up and heading to her sunbed to shake a hand in front of her face. Freddie and Mary were walking away, unaware of what was happening and she couldn’t tell how long she had felt that way.

“Melissa!” Chrissie exclaimed patting the girl on the shoulder and shaking her body to understand whether she was present or not.

Melissa felt the strength leaving her muscles and she crashed on the bed eyes still open and head dangling back.

Chrissie cried out her name, but apparently, nobody was around to hear her screams. She pecked slightly on her cheeks until she saw some colour painting the girl’s lips again.

“Melissa! Oh thank God! You scared the bloody hell out of me!” she screamed and rubbed her hand on the girl's arm. Melissa was confused and looked at her with a dazzled look on her face

“What happened?” she asked.

Chrissie scoffed “You fainted, that’s what fucking happened!” she chuckled a bit “What do you say we go inside for a while? It’s too hot out here”

Melissa slowly nodded, blood still pumping in her temples, giving her a terrible headache.

“Do you feel like standing?” Chrissie stood up and held out a hand that Melissa thankfully grabbed.

“Only if you hold me, Chris” she tried to joke, but she found it really hard to walk properly.

Once they had reached the kitchen, Chrissie made her sit on a stool and gave her a glass of fresh water, reminding her to drink it slowly to avoid another fall.

Melissa smiled thankfully again and gladly grabbed the water. Chrissie studied her face and the way she had her eyes fixed on the floor whilst she was drinking the glass of water as if she was on another planet.

“Is everything alright?” she asked.

Melissa was bloody tired of being asked the same question over and over again. As if they knew, she thought.

She slightly nodded, still focused on the drinking. When she looked up, the redhead was staring at her with her eyebrows raised in disbelief “You’re gonna have to be more specific” she said.

“I must have been struck by the heat of the sun, or something…”

Chrissie was not convinced and kept on staring at her.

Melissa snorted. You can’t tell her, Melissa, then everyone will know, she thought. But then her brain made her realize that Chrissie was one of the people who she knew best under that roof and she knew she could have trusted her. Besides, that might have been the perfect occasion to practice for the moment of the revelation to the whole group.

“Fine” she grunted “You really wanna know?”

Chrissie evidently nodded, sitting on the stool beside her. Melissa looked around and noticed that no-one was around: she gently stood up and went to lock the door to the living room and the one that led into the garden, so that nobody could interfere with or listen to what she was about to tell.

“Are you setting up the crime scene to my murder?” Chrissie tried to joke.

Melissa chuckled and slowly nodded. She came back to the stool, all under Chrissie’s investigative look. She looked at her friend in her eyes and asked for the last time “Do you really wanna know?”

“Christ, Melissa, do I have to beg you?-”

“I’m pregnant” she blurted out.

Chrissie’s chin touched the floor as her eyes went up and down Mel’s body, intently staring at the bottom of her belly. Melissa instinctively covered it with a hand and looked down, her cheeks suddenly red for the embarrassment and the shame.

“Oh God” Chrissie whispered, a hand on her mouth and the other lifted mid-air “Can I… uhm… is it already… uhm-”

Melissa grabbed her hand and brought it to her belly: the bump was definitely starting to show and Chrissie could feel it underneath the large t-shirt that she was wearing.

“Oh my God, Mel…”

Melissa rolled her eyes “Geez Chrissie, can you say something else? Please?”

Chrissie shook her head smiling “I’m sorry, it’s just… huge”

Melissa cupped her face with her hands “I know… I don’t know what to do”

The redhead still had a giant smile printed on her face, but suddenly realized something “Wait, does John know?”

Melissa looked down and slowly shook her head.

“What? Why?!” Chrissie yelped, but Melissa shushed her.

“Right, sorry. Why didn’t you tell him?” she whispered.

Melissa was still looking down “I don’t know… I guess I didn’t want to tell anyone because it would have made it actually… real”. She brought her hands to her face and felt tears stinging her eyes again.

Chrissie smiled dearly and brushed a hand on her back “Hey, don’t worry. You’re still in time…” she whispered “Besides, it seems to me it’s already pretty real…” she tapped on her belly with her finger.

Melissa giggled and took her hands off her face, heavily breathing out “Yeah I guess it is” she said, rubbing a hand on her lower tummy, a smile creeping up on her face “Deep down I can’t wait to tell him, you know? But right now I’m just scared…”

“Of what, doll? What’s happening to you now is one of the most magical things in the world…”

“What a load of crap” Melissa sighed exasperated but recomposed herself seeing her friend’s disapproving look “I mean, thanks a lot, Chris… The thing is I’m scared I won’t be able to do this mom thing. I’m still young and I have so many plans for my career and I’d like to pursue them and John will frequently be away and…”

Chrissie cut her off “Woah, Mel, slow down! One thing at a time… You are young and you may have to shift your plans for a few months, but that doesn’t mean you’ll give them up, does it?”

Melissa slightly shook her head.

“And John will be at work and on tour, but does that mean he’ll abandon you two?”

Again, the blonde shook her head.

“Well, see? We have already talked through two of your arguments. What else you got?”

Melissa chuckled. She didn’t have the guts to tell her she was still scared as hell and that she would have wanted to rush out of there and run home to her mother, desperately trying to feel like the child she was not anymore.

“Thanks, Chrissie” she said instead.

The redhead smiled “Anytime little Taylor” she ruffled her hair.

“Please don’t call me that never again”

“C’ mon you liked it when you were in middle school!”

“Yeah, you’re right… it was like ten years ago…” Melissa punched her arm and Chrissie pretended to be hurt: oh crap, ten years ago, she thought to herself.

They both giggled and got up, unlocking the seals of the two entrances, only to pass through the one looking into the living room and heading towards the couch.

“You know, Chris” Melissa started “I would appreciate if this remained between us. For now, at least”

Chrissie smiled and nodded “Of course, doll” she replied, “Whatever you need”.

Melissa thanked her and added “I think I’m gonna lay down for a bit. If John looks for me, tell him I’m in our bedroom”.

Chrissie winked at her and nodded, looking at her as she descended the stairs. She smiled to herself at the thought that the baby girl with blonde braided hair that always wanted to hang out with her and her brother’s friends when they were in high school and she was still in middle school, the girl with whom she had had some of the funniest pijama-parties in the whole world, the one that had always been there for her while she had to recover from a high-school break-up; that girl, was about to become a mom.

“You’re gonna be great” she whispered, knowing that Melissa could not hear her.

“Who’s gonna be great, love?” Brian appeared behind her shoulders, making her squeal in surprise.

“Jesus, honey, I should buy you a little bell or something, you can’t just pop up behind me like that… One of these days you’re gonna give me a heart attack!”

Brian cackled “I’m sorry, didn’t mean to” he kissed her on her forehead “Who were you talking to?”

Chrissie shook her head “Nobody, my dear” she got up on her toes to kiss him on the nose. When she pulled back she smiled at him and he smiled back, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close.

Brian leaned down to gently kiss her and they stepped back to reach the couch: he sat back quite ungracefully and dragged the girl down with him. They giggled between kisses and slowly fell down the backrest until Brian laid on the couch and Chrissie was laying on top of him.

Too caught up in the moment, they didn’t hear John’s steps approaching, as he entered the house from the door looking on the garden. He pretended to shed his eyes from the scene and kept walking towards the stairs leading to the basement.

He reached the last step and opened the door, not expecting to find Melissa under the covers, arms crossed on her forehead as if she wanted to shed from the light.

“Mel are you okay?” he asked rushing to her side.

The girl quickly let her arms fall on her sides and tried to adjust her sight to the light of the room; she gave him a small smile and said in a low, not at all convincing voice “I’m okay, honey”

John frowned “And that’s why you shut yourself down here? Because you’re okay?”

The girl puffed “I’m just a little tired John, nothing to worry about” she forced a smile.

He shook his head “Cut the crap, Melissa. What’s wrong?”

“Christ John, nothing! I’m fine!” Melissa cried out exasperated. She lifted a hand to her face to cover her eyes: she felt tears stinging them again.

John was surprised to say the least of her reaction: he gently removed the hand she had placed on her face and grabbed it in both his hands.

“I’m sorry” he uttered in low voice “didn’t mean to put pressure on you”.

He studied her face but she did everything she could not to meet his gaze. If you look at me like that I’ll spill everything out and I’m not ready!, she thought.

John brought her hand to his lips and softly kissed her knuckles, one by one; he turned her hand and kissed her palm, his eyes still looking for hers. He let her hand fall and scooched closer, cupping her face with his hands and leaning in to kiss her nose. She felt the tension dissipating through her body and allowed herself to smile crookedly.

John realised his strategy was working so he moved on to kiss her right cheek, then the left one, then her forehead. He pulled his head back, taking the time to study her face, his hands still holding her chin up so that she was forced to meet his gaze.

He smiled and inched forward to press his lips on hers: it was a lovely, soft kiss, that held all the words they weren’t able to tell each other.

When they parted Melissa sincerely smiled and placed a hand on his, rubbing it with her thumb “Thanks” she simply said.

He gave her a quick kiss again “Anytime, my love”.

He stood up and walked around the bed, he lifted the blankets on his side and crawled underneath, laying right beside her and draping his right arm around her shoulders, so that she could snuggle on his chest.

“Don’t you have to work?” she mindlessly asked.

He nodded “I have something more important to do right now” he smiled, seeing her face tilting upwards and silently asking him for an explanation.

“Taking care of you, silly” he added and Melissa softly chuckled.

“Do you feel like talking now?” John carefully asked, brushing her long hair with his fingers.

Melissa hesitated but shook her head against his chest. I’m sorry, my love, just give me some more time, her mind wanted her to say. She thought she’d better keep it to herself.

John nodded, giving up on his mission and snuggling closer to her, encircling her chest with his arm. Melissa flinched at the touch, but immediately relaxed when she felt his hand brushing her hair again.

“I could stay like this forever” words escaped her mouth and John smiled from behind her.

“Me too…” he replied and closed his eyes, completely lost in the moment and wholeheartedly wishing they could stay like that forever.

“John?” he heard her whisper.

“Yes, love?”

Melissa suddenly felt childish and small even asking him something like that “You know I love you, right?”

John softly chuckled, his eyes still closed as he answered “Of course I know. I love you too, honey”

She widely smiled and closed her eyes, all the tension and the pressure she had stored inside her chest were flowing away, as the two of them drifted off almost simultaneously and with big smiles on their faces, each of them lulled and embraced by the feeling of being truly loved.

And loving deeply.

Chapters: ⤎ previous | next ⤏

A/N: My softness-meter just exploded. Hope you enjoyed this one 💗 we’re gonna tag the lovely people who read, liked and commented the previous chapters. If you want to be tagged in the next one, comment under this one or leave us a message. Our inboxes are always open for you beautiful people

Tag list: @littledarlingwellaway @its-nxt-living @bohemiandelilah@onevisionliz@misshystericalqueen @loki-lover095@deakysgurl@inthelapofthe39 @starsoflovingness-wq@minetticatinwonderland@cairdes20 @friendswillbefriendsblog @o-holynight @trash-record-collection @please-stop-me-now @theappleofmybri @marvelsbunch@imgonnabeyourslave @babygotblueeyes @mi55chanandlerbong

Cheers, folks! ✌

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krisdoesart · 5 years

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Close to the chest - Sanders Sides AU

Logan - part 1

Summary: Some background on Logan's family. An 11 year old Logan goes through a lot of emotions about various things in his life, and a usually indifferent father does his best to console his son

I'm really proud of this and would really appreciate a reblog if you see this! Thank you!

Warnings: Sympathetic Deceit (though never mentioned by name), neglectful parenting, divorce, bullying

Ships: none

Word count: 1785

Logan Bowman called his father D.

D figured it was short for Dad, although, based off his typical speech mannerisms and the fact that he called his and Virgil's mom Mother, D couldn't understand why Logan wouldn't call him Father.

Oh well, it's not like D cared that much about it anyways.

D was a very successful businessman. He was known for being very manipulative and had bent the truth many times to get to his position.

D was married to a woman named Sarah. They'd had two children together; Virgil, born early 1999, and Logan, born a year and a half later. Both parents were successful, but they both had busy lifestyles and, despite the family being well off, had never felt like much of a family.

Sarah, or Mother as Virgil and Logan called her, acted as more of a shelter for the two boys. Logan and Virgil were the closest two of the family, but Mother would comfort and shield the two from their father. D felt very disapprovingly of acting emotional and highly encouraged his sons to keep their emotions and thoughts close to the chest.

That being said, D was never much of a father figure for Logan or Virgil. He often acted stiff, cold, as if he didn't care for his family. He encouraged them to be successful but never greeted them warmly. He would often go on week-long business trips and leave his children with their mother. Whenever both parents were away, Virgil would care for Logan rather than make D or mother pay for a babysitter.

Mother wasn't much better. She would do her best to treat her children well, but she was nearly as busy as her husband and wasn't very good at acting motherly. She'd do her best to comfort her children when Virgil and one of his friends got into a fight, or when Logan came to her with complaints of bullies, but seeing as the two had been raised mainly by nannies and she had never been much of a child lover, she was often unaware of what to do in these situations.

Oh, how dearly Virgil and Logan missed her when she left.

June 2012

Logan

Just because he wasn't surprised didn't mean he wasn't upset.

That night had been one of the few times the whole family had eaten together. For reasons unknown to Logan, the meal had felt very tense and uncomfortable. Once everyone had finished, D had announced to Logan and Virgil that he and Mother were getting divorced.

Logan had been expecting it to happen for some time. The couple had frequently fought and had never seemed to be content around each other as of late.

Virgil seemed visibly distressed by the idea of the parents separating. Logan frowned at him, concerned. He reached under the table and began tapping the 4, 7, 8 rhythm on Virgil's arm to help calm him down.

After a few seconds, Virgil asked, "Are we going to be separated?" His voice was small. Logan saw in his face how much the prospect scared him. He wasn't the only one; Logan felt a twist in his gut when he imagined he and Virgil being split between their parents. What if Virgil got stuck alone with D? Logan knew how uncomfortable D made Virgil feel.

"No, most likely not," Mother said. "But there is a high chance of you two staying with your father. We've discussed our options, and what's most likely to happen is that you two and your father will be moving up north."

Moving? The idea both delighted and terrified Logan. He'd been having worse and worse troubles with bullies lately. Summer had just started and he was incredibly happy to get away from the daily struggles of maneuvering school and avoiding bullies, but whenever Logan left his house, they seemed to know and follow.

On the other hand, Logan had made friends here. This was the house he'd grown up in; he'd gone to the same school for the past 6 years and had gotten to know some amazing friends over that time. Logan found it rather difficult to make friends; he wasn't sure whether he'd make it in a completely new setting.

Next to him, Virgil was shaking his head. "No," he said softly, "no, I'm not moving. Especially not without Mother. I'm not moving."

He stood up suddenly, his chair scraping against the floor. Logan startled next to him, looking up at Virgil's face. He looked like he was ready to cry.

"You're not just dropping this on me. You don't get to just suddenly decide to change our entire lives like this. I've got classes! I've got- I've got friends! I've got a life! You can't just do this to me!"

D stood up, looking Virgil right in the eyes. "This isn't for you or about you. This is about your mother and I. Now sit down and stop being so dramatic. You know what I've told you about unnecessary outbursts like these."

Virgil clenched his jaw. Tears were now running down his cheeks. He glared for a moment, first at D, then at Mother, and then down to Logan, before spinning around and stomping away upstairs to his room. After a moment's hesitation, Logan got up, excused himself, and walked up the stairs behind him.

Logan knocked on his brother's bedroom door gently. "Virgil?" he called softly. "May I enter?"

Silence.

"Virge?" He knocked once more. "Are you alright?"

Logan waited for an answer, but none came. He sighed and walked back to his room.

He shut the door behind him and looked himself up and down in the floor-length mirror in his bedroom. Pale, skinny, slightly crooked glasses, disheveled black hair. Logan looked like he hadn't slept in a few days. Which, in all honestly, wasn't far from the truth. His parents had fought late into the night the night before, and Logan had found it incredibly difficult to get any sleep at all.

Logan stepped out of his shoes and let himself fall onto his bed. He rolled onto his back and pulled off his glasses, setting them on his night stand. Rubbing his eyes, he stared up at the ceiling.

And then he began to cry.

About nothing. Everything. Losing his mother. Losing his home. The bullies' unending torment. His father's unending disappointment in him, despite his straight-A record and perfect behavior. The prospect of having to try (and most likely fail) to make new friends. Having to live with only D, no mother.

Everything Logan had been stressing about lately just came pouring out of him. He wasn't sure how long he cried for.

Eventually, he heard a knock at the door. Logan sniffled and rolled from his back to his side, facing away from the door. When the person at the door knocked again, Logan cleared his throat and called out, "You may enter." He didn't turn around when the door opened.

D came in and sat in the other side of the bed. After a few seconds of awkward silence, D asked, "Are you alright, son?"

Logan bit his lip nervously. Is this going to help, he thought, or is he just going to lecture me, like always?

"No," he choked out finally. "No, I am not alright."

"I know this is difficult for you and Virgil," D started, "but I fully expect you to be able to handle this–"

"The divorce is not the only thing that is causing me to feel upset." Logan pushed himself up to a sitting position, still facing away. "I've been having a very difficult time with bullies lately. It seems that there is nothing I am able to do to cause them to leave me alone, as I have already reached out to the school to no effect. My two friends, Leo and Kenneth, have assisted me with this situation, but they are obviously not moving with me. I am unsure of whether I am even capable of making new friends if we move. Who's to say that my bullying situation in our new location would be any less severe than my current one?

"I usually talk with Mother or Virgil about these issues, as you never seemed to care much about feelings. I'm not particularly fond of them myself." At this point Logan had turned to face his father, although his eyes were pointed at his bed. Tears still streaked his face, though he had stopped crying. He looked up. D appeared to be thinking. He had a conflicted look on his face.

D spoke after a moment of silence. "Your problem is that you care about what other people think. Do you think I got to my position by listening to what other people say about me? In case you haven't noticed, son, I don't have the prettiest reputation. But I don't pay any attention to what they feel. It's not my job to make other people happy; I'm the only person I need to be worrying about. If you stop caring about pleasing everyone around you; if you stop caring about what those nitwits from that awful school say or do to you, you'll find it so much easier to enjoy yourself.

"I've also noticed you express your emotions quite openly." D inspected his nails despite the yellow gloves covering them. "It's like you wear your heart on your sleeve! You let on so easily when something's upset you, or if things don't go according to plan. In our society, such a habit can be dangerous. Don't let those bullies know they've gotten to you! They'll just come back to bother you again, knowing they'll get a rise out of you every time they bug you. Keep your thoughts and feelings close to the chest, and people will have a much harder time finding satisfaction in your torment.

D stood up and gave Logan a pat on the shoulder. "Son, know that you can always come to me about issues. Especially now that your mother will no longer be a part of the picture. We are family, after all. Just remember– close to the chest." And with that, he left the room, closing the door behind him.

Logan pondered D's advice for a while. Maybe that was, in fact, the answer? If Logan just stopped caring about what other people felt or said, and kept a mask over his own feelings, would it make his life more tolerable? There was certainly room for improvement, and he saw no downside to his father's suggestions.

Logan sighed. He needed to sleep. He could more properly deal with these emotions in the morning.

#thomas sanders #Sanders Sides #ts sanders sides #sanders sides au #sanders sides fanfiction #Sanders Sides fanfic #Sanders Sides fic #logan sanders #ts logan #ts virgil #virgil sanders #ts deceit #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #close to the chest ss au

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picassho-18 · 6 years

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APPRECIATION POST

I’ve been wanting to do one of these for a while, so this is just gonna contain some of my mutuals, followers, and people I follow that I appreciate and love dearly, so here’s to you people that gave me a home on tumblr!

@spidermanswifi Yoouuuuuu! Just let me say that I love you so damn much! Being you chocolate anon is one of my favorite things, and when I first started, I would constantly check it to look out for your answers and squeal everytime. Me and that CB anon agree, you are amazing and deserve so much love and respect. I loved becoming on of your friends and getting to know you, and it just makes me so happy. Internet friends are amazing! -🍫 love your one and only chocolate mamma ;)

@gingerwritess LET ME JUST SAY this is my bff and I love her and you all should follow her! You deserve all the love in the world, and just a little extra because now you’ve started writing and I can share whatever I’m working on at any hour of the day and you’ll give me such wise feedback. You’re amazing and I love you, and am so so thankful for you as a friend, classmate, fellow marvel writer and fan, and sister. Because you are a part of my family

@hollandroos You are a writing goddess and I’m so thankful for following you, and just experiencing your blog. Your own posts, updates in your life, advice, and reblogs all roll into your blog and it’s one of the best. Thank you!!

@feistybaby You were so kind to me, after I left a comment on one of your posts, and you never left me dash since I followed you. While I don’t know everyone that you post about, I most definetely keep you around just because you are so nice, and I literally start to smile every time you pop up on my dash! And plus you reblog some pretty good stuff!

@sgtjbuccky The “Run to Me” series THIS SERIES MAN This got me into Mobster AU’s and even got me into writing my own, Blood Petals. And not only was that series just amazing, but all the drabbles along with it was just perfection! Your blog is great, I love it, thank you!

@mintmintdoodles All your drawings are so cute and adorable. I love seeing you stuff on my dash seeing whatever you’ve come up with. And you fundraiser with the Seeing Eye is just magical. Through the internet you seem SO nice I can only imagine how amazing you must be in real life.

@plus-size-reader The url is enough said I literally read everything they write EVEN IF I haven’t even heard of the character before. Great amazing writing that I love, and as someone who’s a bit chubby I don’t find plus size reader fics everywhere but when I find some as good as yours, I just have to recognize it. Thank you!!!

@fuckyou-imspiderman They’re masterlist is PURE GOLD so give that a read, but stay for the atmosphere. Your blog just has this feeling that makes me smile every time you pop up on my dash. Life is hard, and I know you’re struggling right now, but know that you make me so happy, and that I hope you feel better and keep writing! Thank you for you work, and you lovely attitude that welcomed me onto tumblr!

@ugh-supersoldiers “Under Oath” Just OMG this series is amazing. I really don’t know how someone could be so gifted with writing something in such detail and a type of story that hasn’t really been written before for Bucky. Even though you’re having a rough time now, just know that I love you and your writing. Never stop please, I couldn’t bare it!

@wordsinwinters “Then Again” series Let me all tell you, this series literally got me into the Marvel fandom. This was what developed me into a Marvel Stan, that’s how powerful it was. I love your blog so much and your writing is amazing! Thank you for getting me into this fandom!

@olukewarmo You are amazing, you comment on a ton of stuff and it never fails to make me smile

@mummy-woves-you You just went through my ENTIRE masterlist never failing to leave a note on every single post, and I was in awe. I literally was watching you go through it in live time. THANK YOU

@celinejfong Your comments and reblogs on Blood Petals kept me going, and always put a smile on my face, thank you!!

@retaw2116 You literally saved Bood Petals. I was leaning towards not continuing and a single comment from you got me back into it, and now I’m almost done with it. I really really am thankful for you and that motivation you gave me!

@98piece-of-cake00 Your comments on a lot of my fics were so welcomed and really motivate me to continue writing thank you!

@ilovetaquitosmmmm Your heart reblogs, though you never said anything, I literally looked forward to posting for you to reblog with hearts because you do it almost ever time and I LOVE IT!

Okay this was the bulk of it, but if i missed anyone know that I love all my followers, and appreciate every comment and reblog! I love you guys, and I hope this post conveyed that!

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mildlymaddy · 6 years

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Yearly (Belated) Review

Alright, there it is. My answers to the Yearly Review meme. Honestly I found this SO HARD. Not only was it hard to find positive things to say about my writing, but also I don’t remember anything of what I wrote last year? It’s hard to answer these questions if you don’t even remember any detail about your own fics.

It’s really weird because I take so much pride in my actual job, like I know I’m good at it, I know exactly what I’m good at, I could answer all the questions in the world about it. I also think that I’m a really good beta reader, like I’ve never found anybody else like me? Someone who will actually nag at you and go deep and force you to rework stuff and get even better. All of this, I can easily see and appreciate. But my personal writing? UGH. Nothing to keep, throw it all away please.

Writing this was really painful for me, when it seems to have been so much fun for everyone else (as it should be, because y’all are so fucking talented and I’m glad you realize it)... but you know what, soldiering through actually helped me take a step back and force myself to see what was good about my writing. I’m incredibly grateful for it.

1. List of works published this year:

This one at least is easy, you can find the list here.

Except that I forgot my original ficlet I wrote, a soft lesbian summer haze story inspired by some Danielle Campbell photos! It’s there and I think only two people in the world have read it but I really like it.

2. Work you are most proud of (and why):

Hahahahahahahahaha…. hahahaha… haaaa.

Sorry.

Um.

I guess, maybe, the Lilo Brits verse? Because it’s like, one of the more “serious”, angsty things I’ve written (and La helped me make it good).

I guess it’s pretty clear I have a real big problem about thinking “happy” fic is meaningless, which is kind of a downer considering it’s almost all I write (and probably what I’m best at).

Oh, okay, I’ve just re-read that ghost!Liam lirry fic and it’s surprisingly nice. I guess I like the way it’s a total crackfic and yet it’s very tender and bittersweet. I can grant myself that. :)

And now that I’ve found back that Danielle fic I linked to above, I can honestly say that I’m super proud of it. I’m proud of how soft it is, and how tentative, and I just… I really like how poetic it is? The words came out exactly as I wanted them to. I really love it.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why):

Most of them? Like, they’re okay, but most could have been infinitely better if I’d just forgotten about them for a bit and come back to them with fresh eyes, instead of posting them straight away. There’s stuff that people loved that I’m re-reading today and I literally cringe thinking of how much better they could/should have been.

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

I couldn’t say. Like, it’s not just that I’m super harsh on my writing, but how am I supposed to remember everything I wrote?? The way you guys all managed to answer this one is what baffled me the most, because I legitimately cannot do it. I’d have to re-read everything I posted (and even then I probably wouldn’t like anything enough to think it’s worth quoting here).

But one thing I can say is that I have a huge soft spot for my Lilo fairy verse. It’s not the most amazing thing in the land but I think Louis as a fairy works really, really well, and it’s just silly and happy and I’m glad I wrote it. :)

5. Share or describe a favorite review you received:

This one is surprisingly hard to answer! I mean, obviously, @catateme9 is the most supporting reader and friend anyone could wish for, by far. The way you boost authors you like is heartwarming, and shows that you don’t need to actually put out material to be a vital part of the fandom. <3

I’m also just really grateful when people yell at me in their reblog tags, which happens often, it’s probably the most satisfactory feedback anyone can get.

I’m sorry, I feel bad for not being able to recall a really good one, I just… any kind of feedback makes my day. I cherish each and every comment/tag/message I get about my fics, so it’s just impossible to pick one.

6. A time when writing was really, really hard:

Honestly ask me for a time when writing was easy, it’ll be easier to pinpoint. Writing is torture, all the fucking time. But some of the random ficlets I wrote in bed were wonderful gifts, sudden unexpected inspiration that I managed to see through in one sitting.

But writing has been especially hard for the past couple months, I have to say. I used to constantly daydream about my plots and now there’s only static in my brain.

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

I guess all the het fic I wrote. I’ve always written exclusively slash, even back in my HP days (the only Hermione/Ron fic I can remember writing was PG, I couldn’t stomach the idea of writing a sex scene). I think because for a long time I wanted to get as far away from heterosexuality as I could. I guess me writing all those elounor, or elounorexha, or louelle fics shows my own real life path towards accepting I’m bi and that there’s nothing wrong with “het” sex.

8. How did you grow as a writer this year:

I don’t think I grew at all. Queen of stagnation, that’s me. 😞

9. How do you hope to grow next year:

I… don’t know? Maybe just… learn to give myself more credit? Be as kind to myself as I am to other writers? Oh and also if I could stop comparing myself to all of you and feeling terrible because I’ll never be half as talented, that’d be nice.

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

@ferryboatpeak will never not be wonderful. She uses both the carrot and the stick to keep me on track (or tries to, at least), and she’s also sent me some DELIGHTFUL things to beta, for which I’m always so grateful because honestly, reading her stuff and then seeing her turn my suggestions into gold is a fucking privilege.

To be fair, I have a lot of incredibly talented writers as friends. You’re all inspirations in some way, but I’ll mention 3 writers that have really stood out for me this year (please don’t get offended if you’re not in the list you KNOW how much I admire and love all of you, omg, so much!!)

@queerlyalex the sheer range of what you write, and the softness with which you tackle tricky subjects, is absolutely incredible. Your fics aren’t only perfectly written, they’re also so enlightening, and eye-opening, and as someone who was very very clueless before I joined Tumblr, they’ve been a wonderful, soft way of truly realizing there is so much more than what I’ve experienced, and getting my head around some stuff. I feel so incredibly grateful to be your friend.

@polaroidgirlfriend, I’m sorry I haven’t yet read your fionrry, but I still think about your university Narry fic all the time. I’m still floored by how perfect and honest it was, you have a way of… of getting at hidden, unspoken human emotions that is so gentle and yet so uncompromising, it’s a testament to your beautiful soul.

@1000-directions, your love for the boys’ girlfriends (and friends, like Bebe) is the most heartwarming thing ever, and I’m so happy you’re constantly putting out these empowering, woman-positive slices of life out into the fandom world. We need more people like you here. I also love what you said about learning to write for yourself and not caring about how niche something is, that is something I could dearly do with.

I think it’s telling that the three people I’ve picked out have that one thing in common, your way of gently dissecting relationships to get to the heart of them, unflinchingly uncovering the good and the bad bits. You somehow all manage to depict love as a bloody beating heart, both beautiful and terrible, soft and ragged, full of hope and despair, and I just… love this so much about you. There’s a line in one of my fics (that sounds so pretentious omg) which goes “so she’ll stop cutting his heart open as softly as if it was a peach”, and that just really sums it up. I only wrote that one sentence, but y’all actually do it in every one of your fics, and I’m just... in total awe of you. ♥♥♥

11. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

Pretty much everything I write is about me. I get sick? I’ll write some sickfic. I’m super tired? Louis can’t seem to get any sleep. Little gestures I love end up in my stories. Things I crave end up in my stories. Often I’m embarrassed about just how much my stories are a reflection of myself, to be honest. I’m an open book.

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

I’ll share wisdom from my actual job : do not cling to your ideas. It doesn’t matter how cute/sexy/well written that paragraph is, or how brilliant that idea is, if it doesn’t fit with the rest of the story or if it’s blocking you up, GET RID OF IT. Seriously. Being able to just delete chunks of your own writing when you realize it’s not serving your story will save you a lot of pain and time.

13. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

Any of my WIPs, god, please. I started so many things and they fell through the wayside and I feel so guilty and gutted about it.

The most important thing of all would be finishing Take These Chances, because I still get comments on it from time to time and I’ve dropped it just before Louis and Liam finally realized they were in love and it’s just… it’s terrible. I want to finish it, I just don’t know how to make myself do it.

But I also have that summer heat nouis fic, puppy/kitten lilo, the lilourry mermaid thing, lilo new year’s kiss, another lilo fic about kisses in which liam must kiss louis every hour to make up for waking him up early, the nouis watching Stranger Things, a new installment of caldell highschool au, that hendes fic, a steamy Elouelle ficlet, the follow-up to the sleep-deprived Louis fic… all of these are half-written or more, they just need a little more work, but I can’t. seem. to do it!

If anyone’s got idea on how to motivate me through this, I’m ready to hear them.

14. Tag three writers whose answers you’d like to read.

I don’t need to tag anyone, you’ve all done it already (and they were a joy to read). ^_^

#about me #year in review #memes #on writing #this was so hard but ultimately rewarding #i'm glad i pushed through #even though it's ridiculous just how HARD it was #when y'all made it look so easy #squad #talented people #queerlyalex #ferryboatpeak #polaroidgirlfriend #catateme9 #1000-directions #my post

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