#also FATE LORE? you mean REAL LIFE???? HELLO???

[eizneckam]

i'm gonna bite someone

[mk-wizard]

Chief Charlie Burns: Analysis of the best human character ever (for real)

Hello. The following is a request by @petrichornial​

Today, we are doing an analysis on a person who is not just the best human character in Transformers lore, but is a great character in general: Chief Charlie Burns. The patriarch of the Burns family from Transformers: Rescue Bots and head of the rescue team and is one of the few humans in Transformers lore who has authority over other Transformers while still being amicable towards them.

To get Chief Burns, we start at the beginning of his official biography. In the beginning, he is introduced as a noble, yet generic heroic human character and he was first introduced as a fireman and his partner was the Autobot Heatwave though even then, he was painted as a cool headed responsible man and was the father of Cody.

In the TV series, he is more fleshed out and nuanced as follows though keep in mind that some of the following is based on theory and interpretation;

Charlie Burns was born, raised and still lives to this day on the island town of Griffin Rock. He has a younger brother named Woodrow and from when they were children, he was always the responsible and logical one though he was always kind and sweet. He comes from a long line of heroes hence why the Rescue Team is the Burns family business, so it is safe to say that his own parents ran it before him. Although the specifics on what Charlie’s parents did before him, they were rescue workers themselves and like him, were good responsible people. Woodrow however decided to deviate from the path of rescue work to pursue a career in traveling as well as scientific research in the unusual and cryptic especially when it came to alien research and his decision was respected. Meanwhile, Charlie opted for keeping up with the family tradition and became a cop. With time, dedication and hard work, he became the Chief of police and developed a popular reputation throughout Griffin Rock. While it is not stated when, he married sometime in his adult life and had his four children (in the following order) Kade, Graham, Dani and Cody though the identity and fate of his wife remains a mystery. While it is never confirmed if he is divorced or a widower, it is a fact that he is single and most likely has been for a very long time because he seems to have it together when it comes to working and running the household alone. It is also not confirmed when, but sometime during his life, he became best friends with Dr. Ezra Greene and still is to this day. Judging by how they are so close to the point of having a brotherly bond, it is very likely that like their own children Cody and Frankie, they have been besties since they were children. During Charlie’s adult life, his parents retired and handed the mantle of being in charge of the Rescue Team to him and he now runs it like a champion. Judging by how Grandpa and Grandma Burns are never spoken of or seen, they either moved away or have passed on.

Chief Burns’ heroics and sense of duty was so reputable that it even caught the optic of Optimus Prime who deemed him as one of the few humans on Earth worthy of forming an alliance with meaning he was one of the first humans to meet the Autobots. Charlie and Optimus’ relationship is both professional and friendly. Being head of a Rescue Team, Optimus entrusted him with keeping the Sigma 17 Rescue Bot team safe on Earth by allowing them to blend in as his family’s vehicles. He was partnered up with Chase who is also a police officer though his approach is more lawful while Charlie’s is more moral. Nonetheless, he got along well with his partner and the other bots, though it is clear that from the very beginning, he is the boss of the entire team which includes the bots. For the entire Rescue Bot series run, Charlie safeguards the secret of the bots and eventually helps formally introduce them to Griffin Rock while still keeping the town safe. By the end of the series, the reach of the Rescue Bots has extended towards the mainland and the team has disbanded professionally though socially, they all remain close. He and his partner Chase were appointed to remain on Griffin Rock. In Rescue Bots Academy, it can be theorized that he is still fulfilling that duty as well as his others though now, he sometimes acts as a guest teacher for new recruits.

Overall, Chief Burns’ is a noble and kind soul. He does believe in the law, but unlike Chase, he is not rigid about upholding it. He is intelligent, responsible and cares deeply about people which includes bots. Charlie is shown to be diplomatic and a pacifist, but he is also very firm and no nonsense nor is he willing to compromise safety or common sense to get a job done unless it is an emergency. Like Optimus, he has a very fatherly approach to leadership in that he gets personally invested in his team and tends to be protective of them. That doesn’t mean he isn’t above reprimanding them when they do wrong and he still holds each member to high professional standard which includes Cody. He is a confident man though he is also confident in those around him and he seems to have a playful side as he wears an apron with a picture of a woman in bikini. He also loves playing games and knows how to have fun. He is also quite the cook and open to meeting a new woman as he begins seeing Carin. One can say that Charlie is the human counterpart to Optimus Prime and he is so far, the best written and most helpful human character in Transformers lore so far. He isn’t an assistant. He is actually part of the team and so far, is the only human to have true authority over other Transformers.

While it is a big pair of shoes to fill, I do hope that another human character like him does make the scene because Charlie is the kind of hero I like to see representing the Earth. He isn’t just a good cop. He is a good man and good dad.

Thank you for reading and I would like to know, what do you all think of Chief Charlie Burns? Do you think he’s great or is your opinion different? Let me know.

As always, stay safe.

[dutchdread]

Hello, your analysis of FF7 is very insightful, it helps me to understand the story and its lore better. A lot of FF7 fans may have this understanding that Aerith scarified herself to protect the world. I personally do not believe that she meant to sacrifice herself, since she has the intention of joining them back after she ran off. Am interested to know your perspective on this? I also want to take this opportunity to wish you and yours a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Stay safe.

Thanks, happy new year to you as well. I am on the same page as you, infact, I got into an argument with some people over this a while back. Someone asked who made the biggest sacrifice in FF history, and there were some who said Aerith, I disagreed because, like you, I don't believe Aerith was expecting to die, they ofcourse responded by calling me names and saying I just hate Aerith. But while I think that if Aerith went to the city of the ancients knowing she'd be laying down her her life that that would be a huge sacrifice, there are 3 reasons why I think that's not the case. 1: As you stated, Aerith herself says she'll be back. While it could be argued that she meant she'd be back in some sort of spiritual way there is no indication that that's the case, which means it's purely headcanon. 2: When remember Aerith, Tifa states the following:

Cloud I'm sure she wanted to give her life for the planet... Tifa Really? I wonder? I don't think that's it at all. I think she didn't think she would die at all, but that she planned on coming back all along. She always used to talk about the 'Next time'. She talked about the future more than any of us...

Now while it may be argued that Tifa might be wrong, it's important to remember that this is a game. The developers are trying to tell a story. They're not trying to present one story while the "actual story" is something completely different that's never mentioned in the product. When Tifa says this, it's not just Tifa talking to the party, it's the developers talking to us, the audience. These sentences were written to make us understand the story, not to purposefully mislead us about whether or not Aerith expected to die, something that would have zero point back in 1997. But the final reason is the most important. 3: Aeriths death has been stated to be designed to be realistic.

In the real world things are very different. You just need to look around you. Nobody wants to die that way. People die of disease and accident. Death comes suddenly and there is no notion of good or bad. It leaves, not a dramatic feeling but great emptiness. When you lose someone you loved very much you feel this big empty space and think, 'If I had known this was coming I would have done things differently. These are the feelings I wanted to arouse in the players with Aerith's death relatively early in the game. Feelings of reality and not Hollywood. - Kitase

If Aerith purposefully went to die in order to sacrifice herself to save the world then that would fly in the face of this concept. The tragedy of Aeriths death is that it wasn't a glorious meaningful sacrifice, but that it was sudden, unnecessary, and unexpected. This may change in the remake, where Aerith hints heavily that she knows what's coming, but in the original? No. Besides, if Aerith knew she was going to die, why did she do nothing to stop it? Even in the remake Aerith talks about defying fate, she's never been shown to be the kind of person who would just lay down and die unless it was neccesary, and from a purely in universe mechanical perspective her death was not neccesary. She could have summoned holy while being alive just fine. If anything, her death made the situation worse, it hastened Clouds mental breakdown, which caused him to give the black materia to Sephiroth. What would be the point of her sacrificing herself? One could say that she didn't sacrifice herself voluntarily, but simply knew the future and knew she couldn't escape it, but does that sound like Aerith? To just go "well, guess I'll just accept it?" No, if that were the case, we'd be shown her stuggling with that fate, like we're shown in remake, but the original game never does that. And to reiterate, this could very well change in the remake. While I firmly believe that Aerith will still die, since her death is still neccesary for plot of the game when seen in hindsight from an out of universe perspective. I think the concepts of "suddenness and emptiness" will take a backseat and the legacy of the original games events will instead be used as the instigating factor to examine things like "what would you have done differently" and "acceptance".

Much has been made about the importance of "memories" in FFVII. (I recommend THIS video by sleepezi for A LOT more information on this subject) It's been pointed out how they're important, and how they shape who we are. I think the conclusion to these themes will be to accept what happened, by realizing that, had the characters have known, had they been given the choice to change it, they'd likely have done the same thing. Even if only because the things that happened are what made them who they are, defining what the character mean to each other, which makes even the bad parts precious.

[tinyteenia]

Siren’s: Analysis

 Hello, here’s my first Lore Post for Borderlands. I’ve been pretty silent in the fandom, only playing the games and whatnot.

Warning: Spoilers for ALL three main games below!

In Borderlands, as we all know, are magical beings that can use their powers depending on which ones they have. The origins of the humanoid siren is sort-of unknown but assumedly they come from Eridians which aren’t humanoid but the power was passed on and that’s still how it is. It’s possible that all Sirens can choose their successor, we see that Maya and Angel have chosen one and we can see that it’s pretty direct too. As soon as one Siren dies, the powers can be passed on. There can only be 7 Sirens at a time, why this is hasn’t been stated or probably never will. Before 3, we were told 6 Sirens could be in existence at a time but as Nyriad reveals in 3...

“You must never find the seventh...”

Now, despite all the speculation that can be done. To try and find the 7th Siren would probably be impossible for its a character that’s yet to be revealed or is so obscure to guess them would seem rash and sort of silly, especially with the amount of characters who barely have any background. Not to mention it’s made to sound like they’re hidden in some sort and have never been seen.

Now before we move on, let’s get deeper into what is a Siren. So... What is a Siren? Well, outside of Borderlands, Sirens are:

In Greek mythology, the Sirens were dangerous creatures, who lured nearby sailors with their enchanting music and singing voices to shipwreck on the rocky coast of their island. 

According to Plato there were three kinds of Sirens: the celestial, the generative, and the purificatory / cathartic. The first were under the government of Zeus, the second under that of Poseidon, and the third of Hades. When the soul is in heaven the Sirens seek, by harmonic motion, to unite it to the divine life of the celestial host; and when in Hades, to conform the soul to eternal infernal regimen; but when on earth their only job to "produce generation, of which the sea is emblematic". (Source)

However, it’s confusing since this doesn’t seem to fit any of Sirens. They don’t generate themselves with kin, purify anything(as we know) aren’t really celestial beings by this definition. You could say they are celestial due to the magical background, nevertheless it’s possible this connection is yet to be revealed. The Borderlands manual guide and Nyriad says that Sirens have also been called “Witches”, “Oracles” and “Angels” as well that “No official term exists” however by Borderlands 3 that seems that every term has been used for thousands, if not millions of years. Siren being the most common.

In the games and comics, however, Sirens are being of unknown origin, typically female, that have powers based upon certain things such as creating physical attacks, moving things, teleportation, machine manipulation and leeching power/life. At some time in the distant past, Sirens and Eridians lived side by side, possibly due to their similarity in ability. Sirens also have Tattoos/Markings on their body which singles them out especially. Another obscure and rarely seen ability is the ability to imprint memories and events onto objects via strong emotion such as excitement and trauma.

Some extra things about Sirens is that they and the vaults are definitely connected, Lilith even says she feels as if the Guardians wanted her to be in the Vault in the Pre-Sequel. What this connection is has not been revealed as even in 3, despite visiting many vaults, nothing happens any of the Sirens in the game that visit them despite the number of Sirens and Vaults being numerous, Sirens can also charge Vault Keys, making them usable. Another thing is that all Sirens typically find each other at some point, furthermore all Sirens will at one point be drawn onto Pandora at some point in their lives and it seems that point is true as every Siren, minus the 7th(as we know) have visited Pandora. All Sirens also have wings, usually in a very powerful form. Lastly, to use their powers more effectively, Sirens use Eridium. However, using Eridium is like a Drug, normal use is fine however, one can become addicted or even dependent on it to the point of death from withdrawal depending on the intake. Angel is so dependent once her source is removed, she dies. Lilith seems to just be mildly addicted, needing it and showing obvious signs of withdrawal. 

Then, let’s talk about each Siren in the Series.

Sirens

(The below list and subsequent descriptions of each Siren will have spoilers regarding Borderlands 2 and 3, including some very important moments, do not go below if you do not wish to be spoiled on Borderlands 2 and 3.)

Here is a list of every mentioned/shown Siren, minus the Comics for apparently they are considered non-canon:

Lilith

Commandant Steele

Maya

Amara

Angel

Nyriad

Troy Calypso

Tyreen Calypso

Patricia Tannis

Ava

Lilith

The Original Siren as some would say, she first appears in Borderlands 1 as the playable Siren class, she holds the Phasewalk ability, aka teleportation. Nothing spectacular about her happens in 1, in 2 she is a leader of the resistance against Handsome Jack and regularly takes action in fighting with you. Lilith says in the Tiny Tina DLC that she used to be a DND nerd, which means she was probably an outcast from society especially due to her tattoos and interests and she was bullied as a child. In Borderlands 3, her powers are taken by Tyreen for the majority of the game and gets them back by the end. At the end, Lilith flies into Sun, saving Elpis and Pandora, her Phoenix symbol embedded into the planet. However, it is never said if Lilith is dead or alive, leaving it up to be a mystery. So whether Phasewalk will return as the next Siren’s powers is unknown.

Lilith’s name shares the her name with the true first Woman in Judeo-Christian lore, however she was turned into a demon and is closely regarded in evil.

Commandant Steele

Steele is considered the main antagonist of Borderlands 1, however, her appearance is extremely short-lived and to say she was dissatisfactory would be an understatement. Steele’s design closely resembles Lilith’s older design, which isn’t surprising. Her power is unknown and could be anything but Phasewalk. She also awakens the Destroyer or at least a part of it.

The only notable things about Steele is she proves(or is the first to prove) that Sirens can be on the wrong side. While this isn’t surprising, it’s juxtaposed to most Sirens that are on the quote-onto-quote Good Side and that the only things all Sirens share is fate to meet each other at some point. She also speaks in a Slavic accent.

Maya

Maya is the playable Siren Class in Borderlands 2. She’s from the planet Athenas and was used against the people of the planet to keep them in fear. However, she learned of the scheme and killed the religious leaders and then came to Pandora to become a Vault Hunter, during boarding the train she catches the view of Krieg who becomes infatuated with her. Maya’s Siren power is Phaselock, being able to create gravitational pulls and force to levitate things and people.

In Borderlands 3, Maya plays a more important role mentoring the young Ava and has chosen her as her heir of Maya’s Siren powers. She says Ava seems special and it’s not said why this is or revealed why, yet at least.

Maya is killed when Ava goes to the first Vault despite Maya telling her not to. Unbeknownst to anyone, Tyreen and Troy have already come to the Vault. Troy ends up leeching Maya and takes her powers, which kills her. Why this killed Maya and not Lilith isn’t entirely clear.

Amara

Amara is the playable Siren Class in Borderlands 3, she is from the Planet of Partali and due to her nature of fighting against evil she has been dubbed the “Tiger of Partali”. Her Siren power is Phasetrance, she is able to summon physical forms of energy to attack. She has no real importance to the Siren story so far other than sharing attributes with other Sirens.

Angel

Angel is an interesting character as she was in Borderlands one and plays a much different perspective of character. In Borderlands one she practically acts as an A.I guide to prevent the opening of the Vault and furthermore, the release of The Destroyer. However, the ultimate goal is getting Eridium from the Vault so that it can fuel Handsome Jack’s plans to feed Angel’s Phaseshift powers which allows her to interact with any technology she can and manipulate it thusly.

In her Childhood, Angel learned she was a Siren at a young age and began to manipulate the tech around her. One day, she was kidnapped and was going to be sold. Handsome Jack, her father and Angel’s mother can to rescue her and by accident, Angel killed her mother after activating a turret out of fear. This lead to Jack keeping Angel in solitude in fear she’ll kill more people. This fear of course is irrational as when Angel got older she was able to control her emotions.

In Borderlands 2, Angel acts the same as her role in Borderlands 1. However, this time she helps the Vault Hunters much more and even turns against her father in the end. Nearing the end of the game she has the characters assist her from being removed from her Eridium supply, killing her. Her death leads to Patricia Tannis getting her powers, when this decision was made or why is never explained.

Nyriad

Nyriad is an Ancient Siren, presumably human. She lived along the Eridians and seemed to know a lot about Sirens in general, meaning that this knowledge was probably more well known and supposedly lost to time. It is also said she is one of the last to learn the Eridian Language directly from the Eridians.

Nyriad used her powers to seal the Fake Vault that holds The Destroyer and fed The Destroyer all of the Eridian souls so that it made be satiated, even for a while. After this, she traveled to Nekrotafeyo and sealed herself and her ability to pass on her powers. However, when Typhon DeLeon and his wife opened the Vault, it caused his wife to transfer Nyriads Phaseleech ability to Tyreen and Troy.

Nyriad also left behind many recordings across the Borderlands using the Eridian Language, revealing that the Sirens used to form a “Sisterhood” where they would all come and join together even if one died, the next Siren is said to have always found her way to the Sisterhood.

Troy and Tyreen Calypso

Troy and Tyreen are a special kind of Siren. Tyreen is obviously the main Siren, however, Troy being a parasitical twin also gained Siren powers being possibly the first and only Male Siren. They are the Children of Typhon DeLeon and his wife and were born of Necrotafeya. Their powers initially are Phaseleech which allows them to leech the power and life from anyone they come in contact with and subsequently use their powers against. They inherited their powers from Nyriad.

During Borderlands 3, Tyreen and Troy are the leaders of the Children of the Vault cult, a vicious and murderous cult that obeys the Twin’s every will and command. Their desire is to open the Grand Vault and release The Destroyer and become literal Gods. During the story, they manage to steal Lilith and Maya’s Siren abilities and by the end, Tyreen absorbs Troy and soon Tyreen fuses with The Destroyer, but is ultimately killed.

Whether or not Phaseleech will be the ability of the next Siren character is unknown, but without many others left. It’s to be assumed.

Patricia Tannis

Tannis is a long-running character in the franchise. She’s an Autistic researcher and now Siren. Her ability is Phaseshift and inherits it from Angel. Nothing about Tannis being a Siren or before her status as a Siren is important. However, she is very intelligent and does take action when necessary. It seems by the end of Borderlands 3 she has become an incredibly important character as she is essentially the new Lilith.

Before Borderlands 3, she was alone at a research site which lead her to become delusional and psychotic.

During Borderlands 3, she unleashes her Siren powers after being contained and is able to save the Vault Hunter.

Ava

Ava is the pupil of Maya who has chosen for Ava to be her heir of the Phaselock ability. Ava became a pupil after Ava’s family died, Ava became a Ship Stowaway and soon lived in extreme poverty.

In Borderlands 3, Ava is a very immature characters, regularly acting out and speaking about how unfair she’s treated due to her age. This is ultimately what would get Maya killed in the events of Borderlands 3. Ava plays a very unimportant role in the game until the events of the second to final Vault where she awakens to her Siren abilities and is able to assist the team.

After this, it seems as if Ava will become a very important character to the Series.

End

Borderlands 3 in particular drew a very important note to Sirens, suggesting their upcoming importance in the near future. Not to mention the way in the Guardian’s Warning in the Pre-Sequel. Something is coming up for the series and it seems Sirens will play a very important role. What that is isn’t even hinted at but I theorize it’ll be something that involves the Vaults, Destroyer and Eridians. This of course is not surprising but to say there’s barely information to guess would be an understatement. 

This post I will admit was just lore spattering and not really theorizing. I will update this post with more thoughts and more information as it is pretty generic “spout of what we already know”. But, I hope you enjoy anyways. I will try to make more Borderlands lore posts in the foreseeable future. Especially character analysis as this series has tons of good characters.

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Ep6: Gozaburo Kaiba Just Casually Started WWIII And Only This One Guy Cares

Welcome to November, where we celebrate writing a 50,000 word book as if I don’t do that every single time I write about an episode of Yugioh. Hello, this is my season. It’s wordy season. I’m so freakin good at doing this. I can’t say most of what I’ve made is any good, but I CAN say at least I’m prolific. Do enough content to fill that bitter pit and walk right over it, that’s been my motto for the past 5 years.

Anyway, I had an awful flu this past week. (Everyone I live with had it so every bathroom was like ground zero) It was SO bad. I still can’t eat spicy food over a week later (Which is so hard for me because usually I can keep up with my Indian friends, that’s my spicy level--max spicy, please--but since this illness, my white taste genes went into overdrive and I tried putting pepperoncini slices in my sandwich and it set my mouth on fire. Pepperoncini. It’s v embarrassing.)

I did attempt to write this post. Unfortunately I never made it past this cap because I got VERY distracted by the emblem on Alister’s face, and how it isn’t proportionally adjusted to match the angle of his face, and it was like three paragraphs of just wanting to talk about it. And then at some point I got very distracted talking about how many empty glasses I was given at my place setting at this baby shower I went to during the flu epidemic, and it mattered a whole lot to me at the time, but I think, overall, was mostly just some sort of nonsense. The things I’ve spared you. 

(bro has just informed me that the 4 gold-lipped crystal goblets I was given at this baby shower was actually very distressing and a very big deal and that I should absolutely talk to at least someone about it, but maybe he’s just saying that to make me feel better, but I have no idea. I am too sick for sarcasm at this time but my god why was I given so many glasses????)

I straight up have no memory of if I’ve made this joke before. Maybe.

(read more under the cut)

Since it feels like 8 years since the last time I could just eat chicken without feeling like I consumed an entire Thanksgiving meal, a little recap:

-Alister pretended he was Pegasus to lure Kaiba and then, off screen, murdered everyone in Pegasus’ castle

-Pegasus got murdered by I’m pretty sure Mai (which is like...OK then...)

-Yugi and Co went on vacation by driving directly through San Francisco and peeking out the window and saying “yeah that’s enough for me”

-No adults, not even Roland, bothered to come with their kids this time, so the only adult of the entire crew--Pegasus--is dead

-Rex and Weevil are luggage

-The Eye of Sauron showed up and it was the end of the world but Yugi threw a dragon at it so I guess everything is OK now

-Monsters are real but they are hard to animate so we’ll just pretend like they’re causing havoc everywhere although most of the planet seems basically unaffected by this.

-The Grim Reaper is a friendly monster that hangs out in a Japanese park and that feels fairly on brand.

And I think that was all that was happening so far.

In a weird twist of fate, Mokuba is the only one in this room that isn’t trapped which sort of...if you’re the only one NOT kidnapped wouldn’t that also be a type of being kidnapped?

And we finally get to figure out why Alister wants to Murder Kaiba so bad and, spoiler, it reaches.

???

I’m gonna get more to the obvious problems with Alister’s devotion to murdering all the Kaibas in a bit but yes, Alister is in fact going to try and Kill Kaiba on this kid’s show because of Kaiba’s Dad, who is such a horrible and abusive person that Kaiba essentially drove the bastard out of Japan and straight to the bottom of the ocean.

Just kinda feels like Alister has been living under a rock...which, I guess he has been. He has been living in some weird Atlantis structure so I guess he never got the memo that Gozaburo Kaiba is hella dead.

So that’s what they’re up to. How’s Sausalito?

Um.

Huh.

So the North Bay is a really classic scenery. It’s rolling hills. It’s NAPA. It’s like...definitely not Arizona. California has a couple of mesas but they’re no where near here and the Monument Valley style Mesas really only exist in Monument Valley.

And I know it’s because the background artist for Yugioh is all horny for horny rock structures but like...this couldn’t be farther from the Bay Area in the way that it is drawn and it is such a shock after all the work they did last episode to research that Bay Area lore. Once they crossed the Golden Gate they were like “well no one will care about this part” which is true not only of Yugioh but also of real life Californian politics.

Anyway, I have been making a map, but unfortunately my original file will not suffice. time to fix it.

There we go. Now they’re in the right place. Just smack dab in Monument Valley, Arizona, smack dab in the middle of the Navajo Nation and so hypothetically, not even in the United States anymore.

While in the car, Yugi has just been anxious as hell the entire time, and just going “y’all I have a bad feeling I’m uncomfortable I have a bad feeling” while Joey and Tea just patiently stared at him flipping out in the corner. So...kinda like a normal trip with someone who has high anxiety/possessed by a ghost. I  kinda feel like this is every girls trip to Disneyland for me. There’s always one Yugi who’s like “no one said anything about CROWDS.” and you kinda just gotta let them do their thing. Just let them get it out of their system and hide in the bathroom when they need to hide in the bathroom and don’t fight it, they’ll be fine. Just hold their spot in line when they desperately look for a secret place to medicinally vape because there’s too many freakin children at Disneyland.

And it is HILARIOUS that Yugi is able to have this type of premonition but cannot figure out that they have somehow missed San Fransisco and have wandered into a DESERT.

Back in Pegasus’ California (an island that legitimately looks more like California than actual Yugioh California) Alister has decided to go completely off the rails and it happens so fast and without any warning.

the line is actually “This doll used to be my brother’s” which is a very different meaning but both are likely from weird ass Alister and this weird ass show, so I’ll leave the cap like this (although yes, this is what I thought Alister was saying for kind of a while until I recorded it for this blog and was like “oh shoot I heard the line wrong when I had the flu huh.”)

Man, RIP Noah, he would have been excellent this episode.

Honestly seems like just yesterday when Seto and Noah were pitted against eachother by a cyberdemon Dad-head floating in the sky, Mokuba was possessed for some reason and being used as a human shield, Tristan was a robot monkey, and Yugi was just shrugging at Kaiba from across the field like “Kaiba if you don’t play good you die--oh my gods, he died. Well that was bound to happen...again.” Man.

Alister should be their best friend, this is nonsense.

So lets do the math to 7 years before 2002.

I searched Wikipedia for wars during 1995 (they do have a list of 90′s wars) and looked for any that involved heavy use of tanks and their artillery fire (on big swatches of cities like this), inner city western architecture, temperate landscapes, and western clothing that match Alister and Mikey (AKA WWII vibes) and found out:

Nothing fits that description

UNLESS Alister and Mikey are time travelers from a WWII bombing in Europe. This is Yugioh. That could happen. Probably not, but youknow...it’s not too late for Yugioh to bring in time travel.

I mean if you don’t want to get super political in your cartoon just invent a world war I guess? We’ve already clarified that Gozaburo was Big Boss, so at this point I can easily see him inventing wars just to sell ships.

(I could probably add thousands of more deaths at this point but I have no idea where they are, if they’re on a tiny island or an entire country so I’ll just...leave the count alone but just now it’s implied that a hell ton of people died during this episode)

People going off about how Sesame Street is so amazing for talking about issues like you’re Dad going to prison while Yugioh was straight up talking about the intricacy of the War Economy. Yugioh being all “don’t forget kids, your good capitalist economy survives off of the undeserved bloodshed of civilians in other countries! Eat the poor!” and it’s like hot damn this heavy commentary came out of freakin no where.

Anyways, this is stuff most kid’s shows will delicately skip over but nah, Yugioh is going to go here, and they are going to steamroll directly through it with massive tanks.

So, lets kill this kid’s entire family and talk about the terrors of the World War of 1995 and all the war orphans who get recruited to become soldiers at the ripe old age of 9. Alister was 9 when he was recruited to be a child card soldier.

This kid’s show.

Alister is...basically Raiden, right? Like as long as we’re talking about Metal Gear, this kid is just one step away from cyborg implants and weird colored blood?

Better wear bright red when you visit the war crime scene, surprised Gozaburo didn’t invite like an entire photo -op crew to incriminate him even further.

Now we did look up “where the hell is Alister from Yugioh from?” (there is no answer) and we did find out a little factoid. In the Japanese version of the show, Gozaburo had bought the land and was just forcibly evicting Alister and his family from their home with tanks.

Which is wild.

He just straight up evicted an entire metropolitan city????

Like the dub did a way better job than the sub at this one, I’ll give them that.

It’s just so weird that Gozoboro just didn’t like...raise the rent like a normal bad landlord. Instead he was like “rather than gentrify my land and save me a ton of money, I’ll just destroy everything I just bought and murder everyone here” which is like...

...Seto did the world so many favors when he kicked out his Dad, right? Like Damn. I don't understand why Alister isn’t freakin worshiping Seto right now when his whole deal is “I must kill Gozaburo” and Seto’s like “yo I already did that. Twice. I didn’t even have to literally kill him either, I just embarrassed him so bad that he killed himself. His stupid tank company sells joke games now. I literally turned the man into a joke.”

Then again, Alister is on the green magic and like I think it alters your brain chemistry somewhat.

(How ripped did Alister get in this episode, by the way? The kid is like 16 years old or something so how did this happen? ...The perpetual horny line running straight through Yugioh, man. Look at it run. That 16 year old is drawn like he’s 28 and really into Crossfit and his crop top gets smaller and smaller like every scene.)

So like this is a very gray issue that I cannot believe they brought up in a kid’s show (like can you imagine if Scrooge McDuck had to face facts that his company murdered tons of people???), but also this is Seto Kaiba. Seto grew up in the system, so like he doesn’t need to be lectured to about dirty money because he was on the losing end of that not too long ago. Seto is himself basically a upscale war orphan since he was adopted by Gozaburo to continue the machine like a freakin maniac (a Solidus Snake, if you will) so of all the people on this show I don’t get why Seto would care about this. This is just how Seto views the entire world as either losing or winning and no reason to feel bad about it because he’s been both.

Also...Seto stopped the machine. Kind of. He was unaware that cards were the same thing as weapons, but at least he stopped the sale of huge child-stealing tanks.

So they play the game for a little while and Seto does kind of poorly as usual, and just when I thought this episode couldn’t get any weirder...

And just like that, Seto peaces out. Like he does almost every single time he has ever played a card game solo except for that one time he was playing Joey Wheeler. (Which was also one of the few times Seto ever won.)

Like I just want to remind you that this segment is in the same episode as WWIII and the tonal whiplash is pretty remarkable.

That’s right, we’re back in the Unnamed Monster World, which is not the Shadow Realm, and which I thought you could only access if you were dreaming and able to search through the puzzle maze.

Apparently this can just happen at any time and all that stuff with the guiding Kuriboh and Yugi and Pharaoh trying to find this place was just...them wasting time.

Again he ditches the legendary sword so freakin fast because who needs a sword when you have a dragon? Only this anime.

And that’s how Seto, who was absolutely going to lose this game, somehow just barely came to a draw.

So just to recap, Seto has yet to win a card game that he didn’t get prophetic help for via a hallucination or Yugi telling him what to do. Unless you count Joey and grandpa.

Then, the one last adult I forgot about, the driver of Yugi’s car, decides that it’s about time that he also died and left this show as adult free as possible.

THE HELL ARE THEY?

Also...maybe it’s the angle but the writing on that gas station looks a lot like kanji.

Yo, what if this is the backgrounds for a different show and they’re just sharing? I mean I doubt it because Yugioh had a good enough budget but...what if? What if that’s why they’re in Arizona?

Anyway, next time we’ll find out if this guy just drops dead or has been a Yugioh monster this whole time, and I think maybe both?

And if you just got here, this is a link to read all my Yugioh recaps in chrono order

[mittensmorgul]

Hello! (don't mind me reading through your blog and spamming my thoughts at you) To add to the Belphegor-marriage-interloper, he pats Dean on his left shoulder after his "I'm a fan" spiel-- the Cas shoulder. Dean's face at that point, I can't quite tell what's going on there. Thoughts?

heck, they could’ve been shooting for a reminder of WHY Dean had that scar in the first place, you know? AU Michael brought back the “gripped you tight and raised you from perdition” line in 14.10, too. So they’ve already connected that whole apocalypse arc back to that mark on Dean’s shoulder (and by association and subtextually, directly to his entire relationship with Cas, since he was the one who left that mark on Dean). In the same episode, they brought back Pamela, who also had a direct connection to that mark (she was touching it when she was blinded by looking at Cas’s true form, which was also brought up). So this is all tied, in Dean’s mind now, to the fact that Chuck had officially done ~all of this~ TO him, with intent, you know?

This is what Dean’s stuck on right now, why his entire sense of self has shattered over this revelation in ways that Sam seems resigned to because he’s ALWAYS felt this way due to his whole demon blood thing, and Cas seems to have accepted easily because he’s spent the last 11 years fighting against the inherent nature of Angels as Programmable Beings who didn’t really understand nor have free will in the first place so essentially just had his baseline assumptions about the universe for the last umpty-billion years confirmed. Dean has no idea if he can even trust in his own perceptions anymore, you know? What’s even real if Chuck basically arranged all of this, engineered his entire life to that degree?

Dean thought he’d understood what it meant to lose his free will when Michael took him over, which is also a trauma that’s still incredibly fresh for him, you know? It sort of feels like he’s reliving one of his personal low moments from s5, when he’d “resigned himself to his fate” to say yes to Michael to spare Sam from having to say yes to Lucifer. And Sam and Cas pulled him out of that.

But now that he knows (or THINKS he knows) the degree to which Chuck had manipulated his life, he’s not even sure his own fight AGAINST all those obstacles Chuck laid down was even real, or his own choice, or if it was just Chuck nudging him to make those choices… 

To Dean, this is like waking up and being unsure whether he’s lived his entire life in the Matrix, you know? It’s like Total Recall– which “reality” is true, and which is the “program?” And for someone like Dean who’s spent his entire life grounded in “I know this is real because I directly experienced it,” this is identity-shattering stuff… I mean go all the way back to 2.13:

Sam: No, but she’s the second in town to murder because an angel told them to. Little bit odd, don’t ya think?Dean: Well, little odd yes, supernatural maybe. But angels? I don’t think so.Sam: Why not?Dean: ‘Cuz there’s no such thing, Sam.Sam: Dean, there’s ten times as much lore about angels as there is about anything else we’ve ever hunted.Dean: Yeah, you know what? There’s a ton of lore on unicorns too. In fact, I hear that they … they ride on silver moonbeams, and they shoot rainbows out of their ass.Sam: Wait, there’s no such thing as unicorns?Dean: That’s cute. I’m just saying, man, there’s just some legends that you just, you file under 'bullcrap’.Sam: And you’ve got angels on the bullcrap list.Dean: Yep.Sam: Why?Dean (looks up): Because I’ve never seen one.Sam: So what?Dean: So I believe in what I can see.Sam: Dean! You and I have seen things that most people couldn’t even dream about.Dean: Exactly. With our own eyes. That’s hard proof, okay? But in all this time I have never seen anything that looks like an angel. And don’t you think that if they existed that we would have crossed paths with them? Or at least know someone that crossed paths with them? No. This is a … a demon or a spirit. You know, they find people a few fries short of a Happy Meal, and they trick them into killing these randoms.

And by the end of that episode, Dean had witnessed a thing with his own eyes that shook him, because he had no explanation for it other than “maybe God’s will.” Even after they learned that an angel had pulled him out of Hell, he still resisted, wanted to find any other explanation, but every bit of evidence was eventually incorporated into that massive paradigm shift for him– angels are real. He had to accept it.

But now… what if Cas was just… another manipulation? What if all of this is still leading to that original ending Chuck tried to write for him? What if he’s really nothing more than a character in a story, and everything about him was engineered by someone else?

Hence while he tried to ground himself in his relationship with Sam, calling back to something from their childhood, something that had felt real to him before the universe conspired against them. And even after that, he’s not sure any of that was even real, you know? And then there’s that reminder of the Mark on his shoulder, where everything before and after seemed to spiral outward, from this “foretold by destiny since the start of the universe” nonsense he was able to fight through his whole life grounded in the certainty that at least his own experience, the evidence of his own eyes, was real somehow.

But… what if none of it has been real…

I mean, the physical mark of that handprint isn’t even there anymore in canon, right? So what about any of that had been real? Where’s the evidence? Can he just accept it all still? Or is he completely cut adrift as nothing more than a character in a story, and not even really real himself?

[alterac]

lets talk about Alterac noble RP

I have an honest question for people who RP nobility that openly align themselves with Alterac: why

This is coming from someone who is very passionate about Alterac RP but feels a little stymied to step into in game stuff because the majority of RP I see doesn’t align with my personal logic steps. I’m looking for some honest dialogue to talk about this! I’d love to hear people’s OC’s extenuating circumstances and the like. This is a long ass post so feel free to just @ me instead of reblogging this with a response bc that’s a wall of text no one needs.

Preface: WoW lore is Bad which is also Good but also Bad bc it means no matter what, HCs have to be used to fill in gaps. When I’m using my own, I try to make it clear that it’s so and I’m not claiming to be The Final Word and Law on how to RP. If your final argument is “I’m doing this bc it’s fun for me, I’m not getting into that weird fascist/white supremecy niche human RP scene that for some reason Exists, and this is my little fantasy corner” you’re 100% valid tbh go do you.

Also: This is a very bad and convoluted way to say HELLO WORLD I WANT TO RP. In the end people can do what they want and I can stay in my corner and let my own personal hc lore monkey thoughts prevent me from having fun.

Non noble Alterac themed stuff I’ve thought could be fun:

Anti-monarchy revolutionaries

Syndicate v Ravenholdt crime families (could easily involve nobility just non Alliance aligned nobility or families that are basically ruined thanks to the Alliance being turds)

Alterac oriented Alliance loyalist regiments (also could involve nobility if the noble was lucky enough to renounce Perenolde in time to not lose their shit and had enough connections in the south to not be snuffed out)

Anyone just want to talk about Alterac? I sure like talking about Alterac. Really, I like talking about all the human kingdoms. If you want to peruse my WoW lore HC tag to either loudly despair over my bad opinions or maybe even look for inspo, here it is. (warning: i also like talking about elves)

How could a surviving Alterac aristocracy still be a thing? Especially a non Syndicate associated one.

Alterac is not only defunct and was basically dissolved by the Alliance but it was the nobility that committed high treason and the entire kingdom burned for it. I know you could be a character whose house rebelled/didn’t participate but it doesn’t take away the blanketing consequences toward the country as a whole which would negatively effect every citizen from noble to peasant. Alteraci based nobility would have no reputation, a destroyed holding, property in an active warzone, no peasantry to pay taxes, and no nearby allies to rely on.

A facet of rping someone from Alterac that I explore is how their heritage gives them a bad rep from basically any other human (save maybe Gilneans, dwarves are a mixed bag). 

Alterac is the Traitor Nation. They almost cost the Alliance the Second War. While the exact fate of Alterac itself is somewhat vague the information given is this:first Alterac was put under martial law by Stromgarde, then Lordaeron and Stromgarde overthrew Perenolde and then simply left. All plans to finding a replacement ruler were abandoned and Alterac was left to complete anarchy. What sort of intense violence could take place during a period of martial law under the age old Red Fist of the kingdom Alterac has had a rivalry with since its creation. 

Remaining nobles whose assets were dissolved by the Alliance formed the Syndicate in an attempt to keep what was left together with varying degrees of success depending on who you ask.

What remains in game are desolate ruins infested with ogres and bickering Stormpike and Frostwolf with Syndicate filling in gaps between slap fighting with Ravenholdt.

This is from the RPG book so yanno, you have to take it with a grain of salt but how much do you think the Alliance cares about what an Alteraci noble has to say on their own defense? Another HC of mine is refugee Alteracis had to swear oaths upon their forced migrations to other kingdoms.

(Sidenote) This also ties in with two weird things I’ve noticed: open recruitment in Stormwind and association with Scarlet guilds. The Scarlet thing is a whole can of worms that I don’t want to touch here because Yikes but I do believe someone flaunting their Alterac loyalty in the heart of Alliance territory is not going to be received well. Sure, races who joined post Third War might not care but you’re in the human capital of the Alliance, not only that, but the human capital that has survived several devastating orc invasions. I’m not comfortable drawing real life parallels because human kingdom RP as of late has gotten uncomfortably tied with some not great real life shit but just imagine being the relative of a 2nd War vet or a 2nd War vet yourself and seeing an Alteraci noble, a member of the aristocracy that willingly colluded with the enemy and resulted in very dark days and death recruit for personal gain before the statue of Uther Lightbringer.

[thebibliomancer]

50 More Days of Comics! 43/50: Justice League Europe #19 (1990)

More Justice League Europe!

But, wuh? You may ask, if you’re invested in the minutiae of my mystery box. Didn’t you say the box was roughly sectioned and didn’t you already get through the DC section?

Yes. Yes I did.

But somehow I skipped three comics? I was counting up how many comics I had left and found it didn’t add up to 50 so went through the box and found that I couldn’t find posts for three comics. I know I wrote them up. I found them in my email. But I can’t find the posts. So I’ll have a very easy three days of 50 More Days of Comics by posting them.

So yes. More Justice League Europe!

This time following in the finest of comic book traditions: thinly veiled knockoffs of the competitor’s IP.

Marvel is more known for this because they get a lot of coverage out of their thinly veiled knockoffs. The Squadron Supreme (basically the Justice League) have become an important part of Avengers lore and even have their own well-regarded miniseries that is basically every Batman v Superman ever. And the League of Super-Heroes homage in the Shi’ar Imperial Guard has become a huge part of Cosmic Marvel and X-Men lore.

DC is no stranger to this either. It just doesn’t get folded into the lore quite the same way. A group of very Fantastic Four esque astronauts were mutated by cosmic radiation and then died, except for the faux Reed Richards who later becomes Cyborg Superman.

And as the Avengers fought the Squadron Supreme, so the Justice League fought the Champions of Angor with expies of Scarlet Witch in Silver Sorceress, Yellowjacket in Blue Jay, and Thor in Wandjina.

These Notvengers were from an alien world destroyed in nuclear holocaust by the Extremists, themselves expies of prominent Marvel villains.

Lord Havok for Doctor Doom, Dreamslayer for Dormammu, Gorgon for Doctor Octopus, Tracer for Sabretooth, and Doctor Diehard for Magneto.

You may recognize that these people have never been on a team together because it would be massive overkill and also there’d be so much clash of ego and personality and goals that they wouldn’t get one foot out the door before they all simultaneously backstabbed each other.

I give you all this exposition because this issue of Justice League Europe concerns the Extremists, or robot theme park versions of them, and also the two surviving Champions of Angor who have after a long time in the woods, either literal or metaphorical, found their way back to a Justice League book and have joined the team this time.

Fair is fair though. One of the many Hyperions (basically Superman) flapping around the Marvel U joined the Avengers for a while. And a Nighthawk (basically Batman) was on the Defenders for a whiiiile.

In previous issues, the Extremists have come to the Earth-1 and had Doctor Diehard/Magneto steal all the nuclear warheads in the world and threaten to detonate them. Due to reasons, most of the Justice League Europe end up on Angor where they find a broken down amusement park and a man cryogenically frozen?

To summarize down a bit: this is Uncle Mitch Wacky, a spoof on Disney, who had himself cryogenically frozen when he came down with an incurable disease. INFLUENZA!

This is a bafflement to Crimson Fox because on Earth influenza is well treatable but Uncle Mitch cuts her off before she can explain this.

Oh. So Crimson Fox is a later recruit to the team. She’s secretly two people and has pheromone powers because those are always anything but sketchy. She’s also exceptionally French. And is neither crimson nor wearing a very fox like costume.

Also here is the aforementioned Silver Sorceress who helpfully gives worldbuilding exposition about Angor. Also also, the Champions of Angor are apparently also known as the Assemblers?

Back on Earth, Martian Manhunter and Maxwell Lord discuss the UN unanimously agreeing to turn the world over to the Extremists because the alternative is nuclear annihilation. Its to buy time for the heroes to figure something out and in hopes that the Extremists are playing by their own rules and won’t just keep the missiles hanging overhead.

Back on Angor, they saved Carny’s brain. Or decapitated robo-head. Carny (apparently an expy of Arcade insofar as dangerous theme parks go) explains some more exposition.

After Uncle Mitch put himself on ice, the incredibly advanced robots of the park kept things running in hopes that Mitch would return to them as he promised. Very messianic King Arthur king under the mountain type feel.

So they even kept the park running smoothly during the nuclear annihilation of all life because dangit, that’s what Uncle Mitch would have wanted. Even when it became clear that there would be no more visitors because everybody dead.

They decided that they’d recreate the world inside the park. So they made a ride that would feature the Assemblers and Extremists and made them able to think and act on their own.

But whoopsie the Extremist robots killed the Assemblers robots and took over the park. Carny joined them because “it seemed like the happy, wacky thing to do.”

The robo-Extremists got restless, craving new worlds to conquer and eventually ditched Carny and the park for Earth.

At this point, Captain Atom (thankfully sporting a short haircut instead of a mullet despite it being the 90s now) has an idea.

Elseworld, the UN surrenders the world to the Extremists. So Doctor Diehard puts the nukes down in their silos thankful that he doesn’t have to be constantly focusing on that! But he can still detonate them in their silos so, y’know, don’t mess.

On Angor, Wacky Mitch reveals that he has a universal shutdown switch to his robots keyed to his neurological impulses. So now they have a trump card against the Extremists if they can only get back to Earth.

‘Oh hey I can totally get us back to Earth,’ says Silver Sorceress at this time. And she transports them back to Earth right in front of Blue Jay just when he’s being a pessimistic ass and driving Sue to distraction.

Mitch’s influenza hits him hard and he collapses, Captain Atom calling for super cool doctor Dr Light. No, not that one. The good one.

A quick time skip and Mitch is back on his feet and pumped full of antiobiotics. He’s not cured, obviously. He needs bed rest and an IV but he should be able to participate in a battle for the fate of the Earth as long as it doesn’t take too long.

Later, the Extremists base and they’re sitting around enjoying ruling the world but not really doing any ruling. Just snacking on some donuts, really. Pretty life like these theme park robots. Lord Havok considers that this was all too easy maybe but he doesn’t get much chance to muse on it because the ceiling suddenly explodes.

The Justice League Europe flies in and starts beating them up with specific focus on keeping Doctor Diehard confused and off-balance so he can’t use his powers to destroy the world.

The fighting is just time filler until Mitch Wacky can appear dramatically on a sand dune.

Uncle Mitch Wacky: “Hello, Tracer. Are you having a wacky day?”

The Extremists all instantly fixate on him and kneel in the sand before their creator-god.

Lord Havok: “Speak to us, Uncle Mitch! Are we wacky enough for you? Are we happy enough for you?”

Uncle Mitch: Uncle Mitch knows when you’ve been naughty and nice… and you, my boys… you have been very, very naughty!”

And all the Extremists switch off and collapse to the ground.

Y’know, I know they were going to destroy the world but they were really slaves to their programming. They were created to imitate the Extremists and the Extremists were world destroying monsters. In their robot hearts, they were fulfilling their purpose to make the creator-god-on-ice proud of them. The moral of the story is that the three laws of robotics exist for a damn reason. And maybe program your supervillain robots to be more wacky silver age stealing 40 cakes and less explode every nuke, hm?

Oh and then Uncle Mitch explodes.

Turns out that Dreamslayer (Dormammu) wasn’t a robot like the others. He’s the real deal. And he was trapped for five years in the Dimension of Terrors when the Extremists (the real ones) nuked Angor. By the time he got free he discovered that there was nothing left to terrorize and nothing to amuse him. So he hooked up with the Extremists robots to find a new world to conquer.

But now that the Justice League has ruined the fun game he was having hanging out with robots of his dead friends, now he’s just going to kill them all because this isn’t fun anymore.

Some legit cool visuals here. Bart Sears, Randy Elliott and Gene D’Angelo do stuff with intersecting pink lines here that makes pasting a spellcircle from google image search look like crap.

Crimson Fox intercepts the magical attack and blasts it right back at Dreamslayer. Turns out that Crimson Fox was really Silver Sorceress under an illusion. I don’t mean all the time, just this specific instance. Because Scarlet Witches beat Dormammus, fact.

Oh and Uncle Mitch is alive even though the last we see of him in this issue would seem to indicate otherwise. Dreamslayer has bad aim. Having helped save the day now he’s on bed rest getting over the deadly INFLUENZA. And yes, I do know that influenza really is deadly.

The Extremist robots are repurposed for Madame Clouseau’s Wax Museum and Flash and JLE bureau chief Catherine are visiting the museum wrapping up some final plot exposition as the comic wraps. Donating the deactivated robots to the museum being Catherine’s idea of a PR move.

It would later backfire horribly when Dreamslayer returned possessing Maxwell Lord and reactivated them. They’d be thwarted again but it would lead to the death of Silver Sorceress.

But comics be like that sometimes.

[joyofcrime-elinorhigh]

Dragon Ball Super: Battle of Gods Arc REVIEW:

Hello everybody, my name is JoyofCrimeArt and as I've said in the past screaming and punching is awesome! This is just an undeniable fact. And when it comes to the "screaming and punching" genre of cartoons there is none that does it better than Dragon Ball Z. (Okay, that's probably not true at all, but shut up alright? I'm trying to segway into this.) The best way to look at Dragon Ball Z, and the Dragon Ball series as a whole is to look at it as just a really cool superhero series, that doesn't try to come across as needlessly "dark" or "mature." It has dark and mature moments for sure, but not in the way that some comic books do where they try to shoehorn in these elements in order to be shocking or edgy. Dragon Ball does something that a lot of superhero type stories now of days tend to forget to do, and that's just be fun. From the over the top characters and powers, to the tonnes of convoluted lore that they make sound important, even though ever arc just ends up being a contest of who can punch the hardest, Dragon Ball was just a fun series. Flawed for sure, yes, (Seriously, next time you watch a Dragon Ball series play this game at home, it's called "Find the inconsistency.") but still a lot of fun regardless.  After finishing up the story of Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z the original author, Akira Toriyama, decided to step away from the series for almost twenty years. He did help with some designs for some spin-off properties based off of the series, but for a long period of time Dragon Ball was pretty much over. But, and this a true story, after seeing the American live action adaptation of his series, Dragon Ball Evolution, and hating it so much, it inspired him to make another Dragon Ball Z movie. One that he would be directly involved in. That movie was 2013's "Dragon Ball Z: Battle of Gods." and the movie was a huge success. So much of a success that it got a sequel called "Dragon Ball Z: Reserection 'F'." The Dragon Ball franchise was given new life. And naturally with all this success, it was only natural for Toei Animation to announce a new Dragon Ball tv series. After 19 years there would finally be a new series, and that new series would be called "Dragon Ball Super." Fan's were hyped....

 ...Until it was announced that the first two arcs would be adaptations of the two newest movies.  

Yeah, fans were not happy to learn that they would have to wait 26 episodes before getting any "new" content. Especially since the movies had just came out a few years ago. But, who knows, maybe this could be a good thing. Maybe these longer versions of the movie could expand on the movies, and add new scenes or different plot elements to improve the movies story, and make it even better. How did this movie retelling work out? Well, let's dive into this and find out. But first some context.  First things first, when it comes to these reviews I will be reviewing the dub. This is because I started actually watching Dragon Ball Super at episode 63, when the website Crunchyroll started subbing it. I was following what was happening in the series before hand using online recaps and such, but I never really went back and rewatched the first 62 episodes, save for a few. So I'm using the new English dub to actually see for myself what I have missed. And since most fans of Dragon Ball seem to like the dub more anyway I think it be better to do it like this. Also, I just want to say that I will be comparing this to the Dragon Ball Z: Battle of Gods film. It's kinda hard not to what with them being the same story and all. Also I want to state for the record that I LOVE the Battle of Gods film a lot. I was a casual Dragon Ball fan before watching that film, but after watching that movie I fell in love with the franchise. I loved the more comedic feel the film had, while still keeping in the drama that was needed. I loved the way it built upon the lore, and how it created a story and a villain completely different from anything that Dragon Ball had seen before. I consider the film of version of "Battle of Gods" as not just a great Dragon Ball film, but a great film in general! So keep all that in mind. Also, SPOILERS for everything Dragon Ball from here on out. Okay, ready? Let's go.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GsPw7x8LZC4

So just a quick rundown for anybody not in the know. Dragon Ball is the story of Goku, a psychopath man child alien who loves to fight things. He was sent to Earth as a baby to destroy the planet, but forgot about his mission after his adopted grandfather accidentally drops him into a motherfu*king canyon. Goku and his friends travel the world collecting the Dragon Balls, magical orbs that can grant any wish, but over the course of the series pretty much just becomes there "get out of death free" card. Then half way through the show suddenly becomes about fighting aliens. One of these aliens they fight is named Vegeta. A member of Goku's race called the Saiyans who, over the course of the show, goes from evil big bad, to anti hero, to just a frickin' tsundere by the time Super comes around. The Saiyans have the power to become more powerful using the power of "Super Saiyan" transformation, which increases there power and hair mass exponentially. Also this arc takes place four years after Goku defeats the evil pink bubblegum man, but six years before he abandoned his family to train some random Indian boy. HOPE THAT CLEARS EVERYTHING UP FOR ANY NEWCOMERS!  Anyway, this arc begins in space where, in typical Dragon Ball tradition, we are introduced to a new villain who just happens to be way stronger than our last villain, and has just happened to never be mentioned by anybody until now. This new villain is Beerus, a God of Destruction. His job, as we learn, is to go around the universe destroying planets in order to maintain the natural balance in the universe. Beerus looks like a giant purple cat, and this reflects his personality a lot. Because like a cat, all Beerus cares about is eating, sleeping, and being a general dick. Only this cat has the power to effortlessly destroy planets with a touch of his fingers. Beerus also has a helper, named Whis. A flamboyant but snarky blue guy who's job is to look after Beerus and make sure he's doing his job. He also acts as the straight man to Beerus's antics, and these two characters have great chemistry together. This is helped by the great voice talent of Jason Douglasas as Beerus, and Ian Sinclair as Whis. They do a great job portraying the duo.  We learn that Beerus has been sleeping for the last thirty seven years, so he just conveniently been sleeping for most of the Dragon Ball series. But he was awoken by a premonition dream, as he foresaw something called a "Super Saiyan God." and this "God" would provide him with someone he could call a rival. Beerus, like most characters in Dragon Ball, has a love for the thrill of combat. But since he's so powerful there are few who he can fight without just obliterating in an instant. So thus, he is really dedicated to finding this Saiyan. However, despite having the dream, he has trouble remembering the details of it, so he goes around destroying planets and eating, hoping that doing that will somehow jog his memory.  The way Beerus is portrayed is a point of contention for some Dragon Ball fans, when comparing the film to this arc. In the movie, while still mentioned that he was a destroyer of worlds, we never really saw it. And it seemed like he did it less out of malice and more because, as a destroyer god, it was his job to. While in the anime we see him destroy the planets, over petty things like the food he eats on the planets not being tasty enough. Most fans prefer the film version, but I actually don't mind the change that much. I mean we still knew that he had destroyed planets, so I don't see why showing it matters much. What I don't like about Beerus in the first half in this arc though, is the fact that they really play up him bumblingness a bit to much. The Beerus from the movie was able to really balance being a wacky, fun character and a real threat. He acted silly because he was so powerful that he didn't have anything to prove to anybody. Here they push it a bit closer to the comedic side, which I think is a miss because the movie got it just right, in my opinion.  After obliterating some more planets Beerus fully remembers his dream. He ask Whis how many Saiyans are left in the universe and Whis answers five And so Beerus and Whis decide to head out and find out which one of them can be the "Super Saiyan God." But enough about our villains, what are our hero's up to? Well, it's Bulma's birthday and everybody from the original series is invited. I really like this, because after being away from the Dragon Ball series for almost two decades it's great to have ever character from the old series, major or not, show up and just be themselves. It's nice seeing these guys when there not fighting and just hanging out. In the movie the party was just held at Bulma's mansion, but here it's on a cruise shop. I kinda like the former better, but it doesn't really matter.  Goku and Vegeta are both uninterested in the party, and want to spend there time training. Goku goes off to King Kai's planet to train but Vegeta is forced to go to the party because Bulma's his wife and more importantly scary. Meanwhile Old Kai and Kibito Kai sense that Beerus has awoken from his slumber. They are worried that if Goku finds out the Beerus is awake, and is as strong as he is, Goku will try to fight him, and that fight could risk that fate of the universe. By the way, I love how the gods view our hero and our villain as equal threats to the universe...There not wrong. We also learn that it was Beerus who trapped Old Kai in the Z sword. It doesn't say why, but I like to imagine that it was because Beerus wanted to make a SICK prank video for his GodTube channel bra!

 Old Kai tells King Kai to not tell Goku about Beerus. However, this doesn't work out very well as Beerus is already on his way to King Kai's planet to find Goku. When Beerus does find Goku he challenges him to a fight to see if he is the prophesied Super Saiyan God, and Goku accepts. In the original film Goku goes straight to Super Saiyan 3, but here he goes through each form one by one. It is kinda cool to see the fight extended a bit, but it is definitely there to pad the length, and also doesn't make to much sense on why Goku would start at a weaker stage, but it's kinda cool to see. Which version of the fight is better though will depend on what your looking for. Something quick or something a bit more drawn out. (And I'm not going to talk about the bad animation, because it's beating a dead horse at this point, plus they fixed it by the time it aired dubbed so who really cares?)  Regardless of which version you watch though, it's a complete curb stomp. Goku doesn't even land one hit on Beerus, and Beerus takes Goku out in three hits. Goku is left beaten and wounded, and Beerus decides to head to Earth to see if Vegeta is the Super Saiyan God. King Kai uses his telepathy to warn Vegeta about Beerus and tells him that if he can keep Beerus happy, they all might just live. Vegeta suddenly has a repressed childhood memory about a time where Beerus visited Planet Vegeta, and made a mockery of his father, using the King of all Saiyan's as a mere footstool. This knowledge, plus knowing how easily Beerus defeated Goku, makes Vegeta decide to suck up to Beerus. The only problem is that none of the other people at the Bulma's party knows who Beerus is, and Vegeta has no time to tell them. (They assume Beerus is some friend of Vegeta from space. Which is dumb because Vegeta has only been a "friendly" person for a couple of years at this point, and none of those years was he in space to our knowledge.) So Vegeta has to make sure that nobody at the party annoys Beerus, or else they'll all die. It's actually some good stuff as we get some good comedy and some actual character development out of Vegeta. The prideful Prince of all Saiyans has to swallow his pride and act a fool for the sake of the planet. It's good stuff. In the original movie we get to see Vegeta singing and dancing to a ridiculous bingo dance to distract Beerus from his rage, while here we see him being an over the top sushi cook. Both are good but...come on, bingo dance has this in the bag. No contest.

 Oh, something that I forgot to mention is that the Pilaf Gang are in this arc. The reason I forgot is because they really don't contribute anything to the story here. We learn that apparently at some point off screen they managed to find the dragon balls and wish to be younger, but they didn't specify how young and were turned into babies. So now they've naturally aged back up to about Goten and Trunk's age. They basically act like Team Rocket from the Pokemon anime, which is fun to see in a Dragon Ball series, but my problem is that the tv version cut out all there best scenes from the movie! They cut out the weird sudo-romance with Trunks and Mai, they cut out the hostage scene with a drunk Great Saiyan Man. Why? I mean we were trying to extend the film out the twelve episodes anyway, and heck that Trunks Mai romance thing actually comes up later in Super, and only makes sense if you saw the Battle of Gods movie, which I don't think is even cannon anymore. (Though I do like this one scene later on of Whis and the Pilaf Gang just kinda chillin'. It's funny seeing the most pathetic Dragon Ball villains and one of the most powerful characters actually getting along.)  Anyway, back to the main plot Vegeta is actually doing a good job of making sure that Beerus stays happy. This is until Beerus decides that he wants to try some pudding, but finds out that Buu is hogging all of it. Buu refuses to share and this enrages Beerus to the point of him deciding to blow up the planet. If there's no Super Saiyan God AND no pudding then what's the point, right? At this point all of the Z fighters start to realize that this Beerus guy is trouble and try to take him on, only to be very quickly clobbered. Bulma actually get's so fed up with all this crap that she slaps Beerus and tells him that he's ruined her birthday party. This causes Beerus to back hand Bulma, and this infuriates Vegeta. It's a touching and awesome moment showing how far Vegeta has grown since his first appearance as a sadistic killer. (Though this scene drags on way to long in the series.)  Vegeta channels his anger. He refuses to stand by and watch Beerus walk all over him and his friends. Vegeta's rage is so strong that it actually causes him to get stronger. Stronger than even Goku! Vegeta has finally surpassed his rival for the first time since the Cell saga and is about to unleash all of this new found power on Beerus head on!  ...It goes as well as you would expect...

(But hey, at least you landed a few hits onto him Vegeta. Be proud of that.)  Beerus is about to destroy the Earth, but he decides to give our heroes one more chance. If they beat him at rock-paper-scissors he'll spare their planet. Oolong is chosen to represent our heroes. Finally, after like four hundred combined episodes it's time for Oolong to enter the spotlight once again and save the Earth. Also THEY SPEND AN ENTIRE EPISODE ON ROCK-PAPER-SCISSORS! OH MY GOD! AND YOU WONDER WHY MOST PEOPLE PREFER THE MOVIES!?  Anyway eventually Goku shows up, healed from his previous battle. Goku decides that if he doesn't know what a Super Saiyan God is, he can just use the dragon balls and ask Shenron about it. Beerus decides to let them, and we get a funny bit where even Shenron is scared by Beerus. (Though is this really a surprise? I mean even King Piccolo could kill him.) Shenron tell the legend of the Super Saiyan God, and how it can only be achieved by six pure hearted saiyans combining there power, and channeling it into one host. This is a problem though, because even with the half saiyans they still only have five. But threat not, as  Gohan's wife Vedel reveals that she is pregnant, and thus the baby is a quarter saiyan. It's a long shot, but they might have a chance to actually pull this off. They all hold hands together, and channel all there power into Goku. And then, Goku starts to transform and OH MY GOD THIS FRICKIN' TRANSFORMATION IS CARTOONISH LEVELS OF OVER THE TOP! It goes on for almost five minutes and has everybody glowing, the sky turns gold. It goes from day to night and back again.(Somehow? Seriously is that effecting the rest of the Earth?) It rains, it snows. It's all just to over the top. Especially since (outside of the manga) we NEVER see this form again after this arc. It really feels just like padding.

Anyway, after what feels like an eternity we finally see it. We see Goku's new form, the Super Saiyan God! I really like the design. After Super Saiyan 3 there was no way to make the Super Saiyan form buffer and with more hair, so like Super Saiyan 4 in GT they chose to reinvent the look. I like how it's slimmer, and the hair isn't as spiky. It works because it's reminisce of his base form, which works as this is suppose to be a new starting point for Goku. I like the way the red looks, and I like the touch of his eyes and even his skin turning red as well. It's really cool.

 Goku and Beerus begin to fight it out, though Goku has the disadvantage as he is still getting use to his new god power. Here Beerus's personality reverts into something a lot closer to the film version, which is very welcome. Old Kai and Kibito Kai monitor the fight and note that it doesn't seem like Beerus is actually trying to kill Goku, but rather teach him how to use his new found power. (After all, all Beerus wants is a rival who can challenge him, so why not help Goku reach his full potential.) It's really cool to see that element in the fight, as Goku and Beerus take on the student and mentor roles. The fight very quickly escalates into upper orbit. Then, as one of my favorite online reviewers Mr. Movie Sunday would say, "They punch for a bit then they're mates."  There are pros and cons to both the fight in the movie and the fight in the series. In the film the fight, in my opinion, feels a bit to brief due to the movies time constraints. The series has the opposite problem though, as the fight seems to drag on in some points. It's weird to say that, considering that the fight only last about five episodes, which is nothing by the standards of the Z. I think it might be because the fight mostly takes place in one location, and the quicker tone of Super makes all the stuff that seemed common place in Z just feel a bit off from a pacing perspective. I wish maybe they spent maybe one less episode on the fight, and devote that episode to more of Beerus at the party.  The film's fight also brings up the idea that Goku actually doesn't like using Super Saiyan God, because he doesn't like the fact that he needed other people's power to obtain it. (Though the Spirit Bomb is just fine I guess?) The theme is touched on in the series, but only in one line or two. Which is a shame because I actually think it's an interesting look in Goku's character.  The series also adds some additions to the fight scene that weren't in the movie, and these additions are very hit or miss. Some things are really cool, like how Goku actually mimics the three attacks that Beerus used to knock him out in there first battle. There's also this really powerful scene where Goku is drowning that really shows what Goku's character is really all about and has AMAZING voice acting from Sean Schemmel. We also get a great scene of the prideful and arrogant Mr. Satan begging for Whis to stop the fight, not because of he's scared for his own life, but because he's scared for the life of his pregnant daughter. It actually really touching. There's a scene of Piccolo getting up in Whis's face that's pretty bad ass and episode fourteen in general is awesome, feature voice acting and even animation that comes close to rivaling the film, which is beyond impressive for a tv budget.  But then there are some less good changes. Like there's this bit where the shock waves of Beerus and Goku's fight are so powerful that it might destroy the universe, and even does destroy some random planets. This is weird because, while Beerus is stronger than anybody we've seen fight in Super afterwords, he's not using full power in this fight and Goku get's way stronger in later arcs. So how come the universe is becoming torn apart here but not say next arc when a stronger Goku is fighting Golden Frieza?  Why is this needed? The fate of the Earth is already at stake, we don't need more risk. Also we get Vegeta dramatically staring up at the fight without talking FOR THE ENTIRE FIGHT! Why? what is this suppose to be indicating? YOU CAN'T SEE THE FIGHT VEGETA, THERE PRACTICALLY IN SPACE!

(D-Don't worry. That planet was PROBABLY not inhabited...Goku PROBABLY didn't just accidentally help commit a global genocide...hehehe.)  Anyway, as the fight goes on we learn that Goku's Super Saiyan God transformation is only temporary and he loses the power half way through the fight. However, he absorbed the godly power, making it a part of him. I honesty don't like this, cause it just confuses things on how this power thing works. Is base Goku now stronger than Super Saiyan 3 Goku was before this arc. And if so, are all the Super Saiyan forms stronger? And how does Blue work? Why couldn't God just be a transformation like it is in the manga, it's design is so cool! (Sigh) Well whatever. So Goku is now fighting Beerus in Super Saiyan Classic, but with the power of a god. But even so Beerus still out classes Goku and actually beats him! Yeah, that's honestly something really interesting to see. Goku isn't able to actually beat the bad guy, even with a new form and all of his talks about breaking his limits. Beerus is just to far out of his league.    Beerus heads down to Earth, ready to destroy the planet, and there's nothing our heroes can do to stop it. Beerus however, so tired from the fight, ends up falling asleep right as he fires the death beam and just happens to miss the planet. Or at least how it appears to be. What we learn afterwords is that Beerus never fell asleep, but rather chose to spare the Earth on purpose, as he finds the two Saiyans on that world most interesting. Probably regrets telling Frieza to blow up planet Vegeta now, huh. (Oh yeah, apparently Beerus did that. You would think that that MASSIVE Revelation would impact something, right?....nope.) In the movie, Vegeta demands that next time they use the Super Saiyan God ritual on him, while in the series Goku suggest doing it, Vegeta refuses, as he believes that he doesn't need some cheap ritual to shortcut his way to more power. I honestly like the series version better here, as I think it's more befitting of Vegeta's character.  So yeah, that's where the arc ends. Do I recommend it? It's kinda tough to say, honestly. Some of the new scenes that are added are really cool, and are definitely worth seeing. But there is also a LOT of padding, with scenes like the Super Saiyan God transformation and the rock-paper-scissors game that are a drag to get through, and only exist to help turn this hour forty minute movie into a fourteen episode saga. If you love Dragon Ball and really want to watch those really good moments, then you'll probably enjoy this arc. You'll just have to slog through some REALLY drawn out padding in order to get there. This arc isn't bad by any stretch, but in my opinion it just doesn't top the movie. The movie is much quicker, has better animation due to having a theatrical budget, and for ever good scene they have in Super there's a good scene in the movie that they cut out. (Seriously, they cut out Beerus break dancing!) You can watch the Battle of Gods film and then just jump into the rest of Super without missing much.  HOWEVER, if you do chose to skip over this arc, I do recommend you watch the first two episodes of Super anyway. These are the "filler" slice of life episodes, and there amazing. One of the best things about Super is the slice of life episodes where we get some fantastic comedy seeing the Dragon Ball gang in pretty much sitcom situations. The first episode is about Goten and Trunks trying to get a wedding gift for Videl, and the second episode is about Vegeta going on vacation with his family. Yeah, remember that one line from Z where Vegeta says that he'll take Trunks to an amusement parks if he's able to hit him? THEY BRING THAT BACK! Akira Toriyama forgot about who Launch was, but remember that! THESE WHERE THE FIRST TWO EPISODES OF DRAGON BALL AFTER ALMOST TWO DECADES OF WAITING! AKIRA TORIYAMA IS A MASTER TROLL!

(I don't care how many flaws Dragon Ball Super has, this one images justifies it's existence to me.)  So yeah, that's my review of the Dragon Ball Super "Battle of Gods" arc. Not as good as the film, but still with some really good elements in it. But what do you think of this arc, or Dragon Ball Super in general? Leave those thoughts in the comments down bellow. I'd love to start a discussion, even if we don't see eye to eye. Also tell me what you think of this review. I hope to review every arc of Super as the series airs on television, so I really hope you all like this review. If you did like this review than please fav, follow, and comment and have a great day! (I do not own any of the images or videos in this review all credit goes to there original owners.)

https://www.deviantart.com/joyofcrimeart/journal/Dragon-Ball-Super-Battle-of-Gods-Arc-REVIEW-678214005 DA Link

[discardedmilkywaywrapperwrites]

Return to TuFort

Activating Halloween Mode was, looking back on it, a very strange and especially stupid idea. The fact that it wasn't even a full moon, and was also the middle of July, did not give TF2 spy player and steam account name "staricipant" a large amount of confidence when the vote was originally brought up a few moments ago. The vote count then jumped to 99 votes in favor, which was about... participant slides to the side as a blast of appropriately named magic rushes right by their head. 99-24, that's seventy five votes more then were on the server. And of course, Merasmus guffawed as he announced the event.

staricipant, firing and hitting a revolver shot on the damned wizard, regrets having decided that it was simply a unique update, a reward several years lacking in the past. Now they knew it was false, of course, and if they made it out alive they'd have to write up the event and post it onto a creepypasta site. Still, the idea that TF2 was being updated again would be the more unbelievable part of the tale. There's a texan yell as an engineer, (staricipant stopped paying attention to team colors about a minute and a half ago), gets transformed into a chicken and his level two sentry transforms into bird feed.

The soldier begins taking a few steps back and the pyro muffles something that staricipant takes to mean "distract the wannabe wizard". staricipant whips out their watch, a trusty strange dead ringer that doesn't seem like such a waste of cash now with their life on the line, and then charges the wizard. Merasmus says something unintelligible, and then a greenish purplish blueish redish yellowish bolt with a few other colors mixed in that comes out to a shade of grey shoots out of his staff. Closing their eyes, staricipant *really* hopes this is less painful then it looks.

---

There is a computer, with no one nearby. The steam menu is up, and although it says that TF2 is currently running, the application is not up. It's quite fortunate no one was around, at least currently. The computer shorts out, the monitor going dark and the keyboard completely unrelated popping off the two 0 keys. The screen flickers back to life, with a new distinction.

A warping effect makes it hard to read, and a monochromatic filter does not help either, but it almost seems as if the steam library has folded in on itself. If you were there, which you aren't, you could squint, and you might be able to make out some mixed names. "Fist Full of Overlords", "Darkest Mania", "Portal to Monkey Island"...

"Return of the Team Fortress" is currently running, the steam menu says, but the application is not up.

---

staricipant wakes up, face down on hard flooring. A glance around solicits a groan from the beleaguered spy main. This wasn't some bizarre dream coming from too much playing of violent video games? No, this was good old RED spawn room, alright. They quickly check their armory, still not understanding now that they've fallen into the spy's shoes how they holster a revolver without a visible holster. The sapper, the knife, the strange dead ringer...

Opening the Spytron 3000 Disguise Kit raises an alarm, however. The cigarettes removed, in their place, a second screen. In fact, the regular screen does not display the options of disguises, but a team roster in their place. Confused, staricipant taps on the new screen. The player-list is all there, all 24 of the poor sods who decided it was a bright idea to play Tufort today. Unless this sort of thing happened on other servers...

Not a good thought. staricipant scans over the player list. Twelve on each side, all of them greyed out, even their own username. Instead of having the pings of each player, there is simply grey text saying "unknown". How strange. staricipant exits the new screen and returns to the old one. It does not seem like they can disguise, but they test it anyway, tapping on the Heavy Weapons Guy. It zooms in on his face, and a piece of text appears next to the icon. "[?], a Red Heavy, [?]". How helpful. What does any of this do or even just mean?

staricipant gives up, closing the disguise kit and pocketing it. Revolver out, although they're not sure how much good it'd do if Merasmus or any of those other beasts came back. The spy opens up the resupply cabinet, pulling out a few small med-kits and pocketing them, and then leaves the spawn room. Sure, it'd be faster to jump down off the balcony, but staricipant wasn't that confident in game mechanics to risk an injury. Better take the stairs, just in case.

It's still a relatively short walk to the bridge between the forts, and staricipant is glad they didn't pick soldier or heavy when this started, seeing how slow the two walk. staricipant's walking speed itself comes to a halt as they stare down at the charred corpse of a scout. They recognize them, of course, they're... staricipant's virtual eyes widen in worry. What happened? No, they're a scout, obviously, but what was their username?

The spy closes their eyes. They remember... well, their life before a madman wizard who may or may not even be real sucked them into the hit FPS, and they remember getting shot by that wizard and waking up here, but... what happened between those points? They knew they checked the list before, and they were here for the fights... where did they even fight Merasmus? This bridge? The intel room, and if so, which one? Was it outdoors or indoors? They never had memory problems before, and certainly none like this. staricipant feels more like a ghost then a real person right now, and they aren't technically wrong.

As they step around the poor scout, their pocket vibrates. staricipant takes a step away, and it stops.  A step back, and it vibrates. staricipant decides not to stick around and continues on into the BLU fortress- the doorways are barricaded. Resupply cabinets and tables block unwanted access. Counterintuitively, this gives staricipant hope. "Bonjour?" An annoyed cough. That's what they get for possessing a frenchman. "Hello? Anyone in there?"

But it's as silent as a ghost town. Only the wind answers, and it's not a very understandable source of information. staricipant looks at their other options. Not being a soldier, or a demo, or even a pyro, there's no way they could get to the balcony from here. The sewers were an option, and not even an unfeasible one. Just... yes, staricipant realized how stupid it was as they berated themselves, they were a bit scared of water over head height. And the TF2 mercs didn't swim as much as spam the spacebar to quickly hop back out of the water. Jumping in was a no go, at least, and since time did not seem to be of the essence, the spy turned to enter the sewers from RED base.

They don't make it very far, though. In fact, they stop almost immediately, glaring down at the corpse of the scout that dares to make their pocket vibrate. Finally, they pull out whatever it is... it's their watch. A lovely gold, and a bronze shimmer floats over it occasionally. It cost about a dollar and ten cents trading refined for it, but it was worth it. staricipant flicks open their watch and this isn't their watch. It... it shows the time, inside. It has an hour hand and a minute hand. staricipant isn't an expert in watches, or even in non-digital clocks, but they'd hazard a guess and say the time is 1:30, although on day and night they would have no idea.

It is still vibrating. The Dead Ringer, as much as staricipant knows, does not normally... ring, let alone vibrate, but what do they know? Maybe this is a common reaction to corpses that the Spy knows of but isn't important to the player. A unique piece of lore, maybe? Something to update the wiki about. Could it stop shaking, though? It's going to fall out of their hands- and it does. staricipant, still getting used to wearing fine gloves, flubs their chance to catch it, and it falls, rattling, onto the dead scout's ankle. The world goes dark, and video game player staricipant gets a killer headache.

---

"Med down! Oh ey, you want some too?" "Try! You idiot, get back here!" "I can take'm oh god oh I am on FIRE help me hel-"

---

staricipant stares, dumbfounded, at the flaming corpse of the scout. The voices in their head seemed so lifelike, and yet everyone in this scene is as motionless as a statue. The scout, falling over, was attempting to flee a pyro down the bridge, as a sniper in the direction the scout was running pulls an arrow out of the quiver for their bow. A spy stands next to the sniper, whiffing a revolver shot on the pyro. staricipant realizes that something is very off.

They can see, but there's no color anymore. They can't even tell which team the scout is on, or the pyro, or the sniper, although they can guess the pyro isn't on this team's side. A glance behind the pyro shows the dead body of a medic, assumedly the cause of this "Med Down" call from the scout. There's no one else around, really. But the entrance to the BLU base is unblocked, now! A sneaky way around a problem, and staricipant didn't even need to get their shoes wet. They proudly march inside, and stare at a black void. They touch it, and it repels them like a trampoline. How helpful.

It also hurts their head, again. Great. They walk back outside, staring up at a white sun. Something vibrates in their pocket, and they check the watch in their hand. Wait, no, that's not it. This time, the disguise kit is to blame. staricipant flips it open, anger slowly creeping under the ski mask. What now? Both screens are empty, but when it's open, that quickly changes. The right-hand screen begins... typing.

[24 names met their fates here, in these fortresses.] [It is your solemn duty to put name to face, and face to fate.] [Accomplish this, and you shall be set free.] [Fail, and remain stuck.] [Good luck.]

"Good luck?" The spy snarls, anger having been replaced by rage. "I get trapped in some bizzaro TF2, and the message is GOOD LUCK?" The disguise kit is slapped closed and shoved violently in their pocket. staricipant sits down suddenly, grumbling. "Oh, isn't this just magnifique. Magnificent, damn it all to hell. Fine, I'll solve a stupid puzzle. Just so I can stop being french."

[sunlitpeony]

dear followers,

2017 is quickly coming to a close, and with a lot of negativity and hate brewing in the community just days before Christmas, I’d like to take the chance to be positive for a moment.

I’ve had this blog for a little while now, and it has brought me a lot of joy during my time here. It’s seen several comings and goings, meetings and partings, making new friendships and the sad end of others, but in general I’ve really had a lot of fun being a part of the FFXIV fandom. In general, the good has outweighed the bad, and I’m thankful for all the wonderful times and people who have become a part of my life, whether that part be big or small. It’s always such an honor when people mention they like Ane or my writing as both were something I’ll admit I was nervous about when I first started up here. I’ve roleplayed for the better part of my life, but I can often be too hard on myself, too demanding of my time and spoons, and I frequently burn myself out trying to do too much. It had taken some of the joy out of writing and replaced it instead with a sort of sneaky dread, a worry that I wouldn’t be good enough or that I’d come back around and hate my writing again... but that hasn’t happened. Some of it has been my own working to be easier on myself, but a lot of it has come in support from people who have sent me kind messages, befriended me, or just left me a sweet word every once in a while for no reason other than to be nice... and I’m thankful for each and every one I receive, anonymous or named, published or quietly kept close for those days when I am down. I’m so glad that there are even just a few of you who like what I do on this blog, and I’m so grateful for your choosing to stay even when I am very slow, very quiet, or very absent when things get rough.

@aymeric-the-blue ||

It likely surprises no one that you’re the first person I’m naming. There are so many things I could write here about you. You have such a kind heart, and you’re so generous with yourself, your time, and your spoons even on those times you feel you have nothing left to give, and you’re without a doubt one of the most caring people I’ve ever known. I had always admired your writing, but what made me want to approach you was how you conducted yourself as a person behind your blog. You’ve always preached positivity, and I know you’ve been behind lots of uplifting anonymous messages sent throughout the fandom, much as you try to deny it. You work so hard to make people smile and feel welcome, and I’ve always appreciated that about you. I’ve spent a lot of time alone and frustrated this year, but no matter what you always made yourself available to help support me and give me a shoulder to lean on when 2017 has been literally nothing but difficult and draining. You never guilted me. You never got tired of me. You never gave up on me, not even on those occasions it got tempting to give up on myself. You have always been a bright light in my life, something constant and dependable, and I’m so thrilled and blessed to be able to call you my best friend. Our friendship might have begun through roleplay, but for a long time that’s just been a bonus -- knowing you and being friends with you is the real gift. Thank you for always being there for me, and I’ll always do my best to be there for you, too. You are loved.

@drowsydraws ||

You might not be part of the fandom, but you’ve been part of my life for years now. It always makes me a little sad that we don’t get to see one another very often anymore, but I’m also thrilled that you’ve found lots in your life to make you feel happy -- and even though it’s rough imagining us living even further apart, I hope you know that I want to support you wherever you choose to go and whatever you decide to do. Sometimes I question whether there’s a mean bone in your body, and the way you treat other people has often inspired me to try and be gentler myself in those times I don’t feel like being that charitable. You are so talented, and I’ve loved watching you and your art change and grow over the years... and I sincerely hope that you continue pursuing and embracing your creativity regardless of anything rude anyone might say because you are worth more than you often give yourself credit for, in many, many ways. Thank you for being my friend across all the distance, and I hope we continue to be when that distance may grow to be a little more. Keep your chin up. You are loved.

@punchycatte ||

I’m so glad you’re back in my life after being apart for a while. I know we were never particularly close to start with, but you never treated me with anything but kindness during the time we played together before. Hearing your voice on Discord always eased my anxiety during group calls with people I didn’t know that well because you were always nice enough to say hello to me, no matter how quiet I was or how stealthily I tried to sneak in, and it was always really nice to hear you laugh when I made some dumb side comment. Honestly, it kept me coming back to group gatherings knowing there was someone who always regarded me in a friendly way, even though we didn’t know one another. It’s nice to get to hang out with you again, and I really mean that. Things have been difficult for you, but I hope you know that you are a wonderful person, and I’m not just saying that because we’re friends. You have a genuinely good heart, and you deserve so much more than you might think. You are loved.

@dennydraws ||

You are so bright and bubbly. It’s always a joy to talk to you, even though we don’t quite do it as much as we used to. Your art always makes me smile, no matter who’ve you’ve drawn or how much, and you’ve always been something of an art role model for me. But more than that, you are so sweet, and you have stayed sweet even when times have gotten rough for you or when work is overwhelming. You still find time to hop by your blog and write up kind messages for people, and I’m grateful for every little thing you tag me in -- it always makes me feel a little closer to you, especially when we haven’t poked one another in a while. Your comments on my screenshots have gotten me through a discouraging moment more than once, and I want to thank you for that and for all your kind support over our time as friends. You are loved.

@castingdebauchery ||

I miss you. I was honestly a little heartbroken for you when you finally decided to leave the roleplay side of the fandom, and I know that the community got a little dimmer and darker for your departure -- but know that I was also glad that you were doing something that was good for you, especially when you seemed sad for so long. Please know that you always have a friend in me even so, no matter where you may land or how far you may go. Lisette was a joy who was so thoughtfully crafted, and I always loved seeing her and your writing on my dashboard. I hope you know I smile whenever I see your name pop up in my activity feed. You are loved.

@sword-and-lance ||

Talking with you is always a blast. I’ve loved all our weird conversations about this, that, and the other. Dae is such an interesting character, and I really dig your writing. I know sometimes you feel discouraged about how it looks or reads, and while I’d never begrudge you feeling that way, I hope you know that you have at least one person who is always happy to see it go by on the dashboard. We can both be rather salty about in-game nonsense together, but honestly I really like that. I’d love to roleplay with you again sometime. Thank you for those times you kept me company... and for cute pictures of your maniac cat. You are loved.

@unmeimusho ||

It’s been a while since we spoke, but I hope you are happy somewhere. I miss our conversations and brainstorms, all the weird bard headcanons we swapped and the general mutual support we had for odd theories and ways of approaching certain things in the lore. Fate was always such a sweetheart, and I have you to thank as one of the first people to ever roleplay with Ane. You were someone who made me feel welcome and a part of something, and that was something I think we both really needed when we met. You kept beside me even when some other things sort of fell apart, and I’ll never forget how you didn’t forget me, either. Thank you for having always treated me so kindly. You are loved.

To my followers, those I’ve spoken to on occasion and those I never have, people who watch me quietly and those who leap in quite frequently, those I chat with on Discord and those I’ve unknowingly spoken through only via anonymous messages, thank you. I’ve always appreciated all the support I’ve gotten here, and every little kind word you’ve given me has meant something -- even if I didn’t publish it or you worried it got lost in the shuffle. I have it. It’s all meant something, and so do you.

Merry Christmas. You are loved.

[pandoraships]

Hello! I just read your Shards of Power ff on ao3, and I looooove it, but I gotta say, as someone who doesn't play WOD, it was rather confusing on understanding the system. I was wondering if you have any form of trivia or facts about the universe to understand it better? Thank you

Oh Geeze someone actually read it?! and you like it!? 

First off thank you! Secondly I am so sorry about the confusion! It’s hard to balance story telling with out having Bakugo recount an entire source book to get the information out.

So the world of Darkness is rather thick Lore wise, and, as with all good rpg systems it allows for “different” versions of lore for each type of game. So It can be massively confusing. For this story though we can focus on the “Mage Lore”.

Mages are, as a group, as varied and multifaceted as any human population. They don’t themselves know exactly why they got the power they have, but there are few things they all agree on: 

1. The world is broken into three parts:

The Supernal realms :  This is the world of Truth, and was at one point part of our own world. It is a realm where everything is as it should be. The trees are perfect trees, the mind is not separated form the form, sickness is only there to make you stronger etc. Think Heaven/Nirvana/the summer lands. This world is separated into smaller lands, about 365 of them, and each is ruled by a different truth. 

The Fallen world / The Lie / The Mundane world : This is our world, the one you and I live in every day, but with a twist. Behind the scenes monsters lurk. They have always been with us, and humans stay blissfully unaware. The mages call it the lie, a sort of dream forced on every human through the use of a “sleeping” curse buried in their souls. Soul focused mages call it a “Shard of the lie” because it’s a part of the soul that anchors the lie to a person. It makes them forget, rationalize and dismiss any idea of anything but what the lie wants them to believe. 

Mages are humans whose souls have, at a crucial moments rejected the lie, and rid themselves of the lie to have their eyes opened to their true potential.

The Abyss: If the two worlds were part of one whole the Abyss was never supposed to exist. It is both a force of nature and a sentient angry resentful representation of every reality that never came to be. Because of this it seeks only one thing: To destroy both worlds and place itself in it’s place. It is the antithesis of truth and the lie. It is simply oblivion. 

It was summoned into being when the Worlds split apart, like an infinite ocean between the two. 

2.   Magic comes from the Supernal realm, crosses the abyss and powers spells. 

All magic is from the Supernal realm end of story. When the world split magic left, and it was only through some miracle that a few people managed to shake off the fall out and adapt to pull the power down to them. So far 10 of the realms have been accessed by Mages, through 5 paths that bridge the Abyss. Those realms are 

The Aether: Realm of the Obrimos. 

Most often called “Heaven” by those who misunderstand the path, The Aether is a place of Order and Power. It gifts those who walk their paths to it access to Prime, the coding of magic and the truth of the world above, and Forces, the powers of the forces of the universe, such as gravity, heat, kinetic force, speed.  

It’s Watchtower, the guiding anchor point of a path, calls to those willing to see beyond their own needs to the needs of others, and as such it has gotten a reputation for attracting religious types, but really anyone who believes in something larger than themselves will awaken to the Truth of this realm. 

Izuku awakened here because he so desperately believed that someone had to make things right that it allowed him to reach out to it. 

Arcadia: Realm of the Acanthus.

 Arcadia is a place of Time and Fate, where everything is bound by oaths and the cycles of time. Closely associated with the Fae this is the world that King Uther Pendragon went to visit to get Excalibur. To those willing to bargain with it for power it gifts control over Time, allowing them to swim against the tides, and Fate, the ability to create, destroy or enforce the threads that guide every person through their life. 

It’s Watchtower calls to those who trust to fate, or struggle to fight against it. It has a reputation for calling to fools, people unwilling to take control of themselves and their fate. Yet more than most Acanthus are the hardest to fool, as they can see the past present a future. 

Bakugo awoke to this path in a moment of need, but he won’t speak to anyone about it. 

The Primal Wilds : Realm of the Thyrsus. 

The Primal Wilds is a place of ever expanding Life and the Spirit of the world. It is the world untouched by humans, where boars the size of mountains roam through trees the size of skyscrapers. Those who can survive it’s trials wrest from it control over Life and Spirit.  They can control, create, destroy, change and bind both. 

it’s watch tower summons those willing to forgo the mores of society, or those willing to do what it takes to survive. It has a reputation for calling people who are brutish or violent. It also tends to call those unwilling to follow the norms of society. That being said you can find those who passed their challanges anywhere, from the Woods to a dance floor and even a boardroom in a fortune 500 compant.

Kirishima awoke to this, along with another mage, during a struggle that made him question what society wanted him to do. 

The Underworld / Stygia : Realm of the Moros. 

This, out of all the Realms, is the closest you come to a true heaven. It’s a realm of vast material wealth and rest for the shades that wander it. Damaged during the split of the worlds it is also the closest to the Abyss. It is here that all souls eventually travel to, but for those who seek to return from death and succeed it grants it’s boon. For those it chose they stand with one foot in the grave, able to speak to Ghosts, revive the dead in a way, and grant ultimate death of oblivion to their enemies. At the same time it gives all that a living mortal would need to keep themselves alive, allowing them control over the Matter of the world. Stone to bread, lead to gold, glass to jewels, all simple tasks of rearranging the basics of the world. 

It’s watch tower calls to those who realize in their last moments what it means to be alive. It grants them a second chance, a reprieve from their rest, to will themselves back.  It has a reputation for making boring mages, those that would rather tinker with the worlds systems than make big changes. The thing is Moros know well that nothing is permanent, even the massive changes, so you want to make the process better.  

An unknown mage awoke to this path because he refused to leave someone alone to fight on his own. 

Pandemonium: The realm of the Mastigos 

If the Aether is “Heaven” than Pandemonium is “Hell, but only by the ill informed. Yes it is a realm of the human mind, where all our demons and ills lurk, but it is also a realm of ever shifting perspectives and intimacy untold. It is the realm where you know yourself truly, and either you accept it or you die. For those who drag themselves through the gauntlet that this path is it gives them all the tools needed to enforce their Will on the world. They come back able to command their lesser Minds with a simple word, and makes them like it. No thought, No action, is safe from them. They can be anywhere at any time, Space is nothing to them, no walls can keep them out. 

An unknown mage awoke to this when he decided enough was enough and sent a family members mind into the void. 

There are, according to legend, more but only these have been confirmed. 

3. Sleepers cannot know, or at least until the shed their lie. 

While opinions on Sleepers vary massively from mage to mage, it is a fact that Sleepers knowing is Bad News ™. The lie that infects them eats away at magic, and can, if the magic is flashy enough, cause the Abyss to notice the casting of a spell and mess with it.  There are stories of a Mage casting a spell in front of sleepers once and turning himself inside out. Little things cause less risk, but it’s always there.  Some sleepers can shed that lie slowly, but it can cause them to go mad if you force it. 

These are pretty much the only thing every mage agrees on. Everything else depends on what you choose to believe and the society you belong to. 

Mage Society : Origins

Almost every Mage is told this when they first awaken, but no one ever can agree on the specifics, or even if it’s a real thing. The only reason it’s told is because it explains the Social order now. 

Once long ago there was a shining city, built by dragons who called to the Dreamers, people from all across the world, from every tribe and continent. They came and found that the Dragons had left, only their bones lay sleeping in the caves below the city. 

The Dreamers found they were gifted with power by these bones, given strenght for having traveled to claim it. They made their homes there, and began to strengthen themselves.  They elected Mage kings, and for many centuries sought to seek enlightenment. 

But as with all power there are those who want it faster than it comes, and soon there was a split in the city, between those loyal to the dragon dream, and those who wanted to go straight to the source.  They wrested power from those loyal and set to building a great ladder to the source of truth. 

A great war broke out between them, and the Dreamers were winning. In desperation those who built the Ladder, Now known as the Exarchs, fled up the ladders, with the leaders of the Dreamers, known as the Oracles, in hot pursuit. They fought in the true world and   in the fight the Ladder fell, ripping the world apart below them, and summoning the abyss. 

In the ages that followed even the great mages were susceptible to the lie, and forgot their gifts. Yet the Oracles were not lost. They went and built watch towers in each of their realms, and called to the brethren to reclaim the dream.  

The Exarchs though fought to keep the lie in place, so they would not need to share their power. To this day they struggle, across the panes of Truth and in the Fallen world. 

Mage Society : A primer.

Again, Mages are as Diverse as they are numerous. Mages exist in every country, demographics group, and political movement you can think of. That being said there are 3 main groups that exist consistently across the spectrum. 

The Diamond Orders/ The Pentacle : 

Known as the “Inheritors of Atlantis” these are the people who want to reunite magic with the world. This is who our main cast belong to. Depending on a couple of factors they separate themselves into 4 or 5 main groups.  Those are: 

The Diamond Orders: 

Considered the Original orders, these four Orders fashion themselves off the Orders of the Dragons from the Supposed original mage city of Atlantis. When this city fell during the splitting of the worlds they reformed and attempted to hold the worlds together. 

The Adamantine Arrow: 

Also known as :  Talons of the Dragon. 

These are warrior mages, who believe that conflict is natural and place themselves in between the threats of the Lie and their comrades. They delicate themselves to keeping all in their range safe as the war rages. They reject high offices to instead serve. The pledge Oaths and are honor bound to keep them, and often will die in pursuit of them. 

The Silver Ladder : 

Also known as : The Voice of the Dragon 

The Ladder are the diplomats and law keepers of the Diamond orders. They form themselves into a sort of Meritocratic cooperation, where you work your way up into power.  They task themselves with keeping track of the Awakened and providing for what they need. They handle disputes and law breaking with in the Concillium, (a group of mages in any give area ) and advise the head of the government. They also work as go between for neighboring groups to make sure that if needed they can help against threats.  They hope one day if they can make everyone cooperate they might be able to charge the abyss and reclaim what they lost. 

The Guardians of the Veil : 

Also known as : The Eye of the Dragon 

The Gaurdians are the cover up agency, think men in black but for magic. They believe that unchecked magic is Dangerous ™  and who has access to it should be controlled carefully, until the world is back together that is. They fight against things that the Arrows can’t, like dangerous items, creatures from the abyss, and spies in the various orders ranks. They believe that if they get their hands dirty they will spare others from doing it. 

The Mysterium: 

Also known as : The Wings of the Dragon 

These are the closest to “Traditional” Mages your going to get. They thirst for Knowledge and attempt to find and catalog every magical thing they can find. Think Indiana Jones meets your local Librarian. They experiment and push the limits of magic, and hope that one day they can find the missing link to tie the world together. 

The Free Councils: 

Also known as : The Fire of the Dragon. 

While not technically incorporated into the Diamond there is a Fifth “Order” called the Free council. Having been brought in very late (like during the Enlightenment era) These are still considered outsiders in their Conciliation, and tend to try to distance themselves from the more traditional orders. Still when push comes to shove the Councils are counted as invaluable to the Traditional orders.  

They tend to be made up of who ever agrees on 3 key principals: 

1) Hierarchy enforces the Lie 

2) Every human is Magical already, it’s just about waking them up. 

3) Seers are evil and must be overthrown. 

The Councils are loosely connected world wide, and each adopts their own style of governance. Most likely this takes the form of a town hall meeting is a with elected officials being offered as “representatives” to the various Diamond orders so they can vote in the Larger Concillium. Sometimes if they are particularly in disagreement with the Diamond they task these representatives with driving the other orders insane. They also have developed and maintained as sort of “Free council” web which they use to keep in contact. 

When referring to the Orders they often use the term “Pentacle” to include themselves. 

The Nameless: 

Neutral Mages, people who don’t believe the world is broken, or who just wants to do their own thing. These are also those who aren’t fully awakened, called hedge mages. They are considered as people who come from mages who never involved themselves in the war. 

The Seers : 

If the Pentacle inherited Atlantis these are the servants of the people who built the ladder. Gifted power in a way different the the Pentacle they worship the Exarchs as gods. They want to enforce the status Quo for various reasons, both personal and greed based. They do not see those who are outside of their group as worthy of the blessings and have no qualms with using them to their ends. They are specifically very adverse to the Free Council and often fight them openly in the streets. 

Pentacle mages : Day to Day life. 

Mages in the Five Pentacle orders tend to group themselves into 3 main social groups. 

The Order: 

The Largest is that of their order, where they move up the ranks in the Specific group. This gains them access to secrets they would not normally have, and allows them to amass status they can use in other Concillium.  This works because most mages in an order agree on a basic understanding of the best way to enlightenment. 

Each order has their own structure, but it works a lot like a secret club, with ranks that decide on policy for the order. 

E.g. Suneater is Riot’s First Talon, he is the leader of his group of Arrows and makes plans for the group as a whole. 

The Path : 

Like an extended family the path is a group of people who all share the same basic powers. While you can gain some titles in a path it’s usually something akin to a chosen rep to the Pentacle as a whole than anything like true power. Here the Mages find those who can teach them how to use their power mechanically.  The two titles assigned  to paths are “councilor” who works as a Council member and represents the Path of the city, and Provost, who works as a Secretary to both the Council as a whole, but primarily to their singular councilor. 

E.g. Present Mic is the Provost to the Obrimos Councilor of the city Eraser-head. Their task together is to track the Obrimos of the city and keep them from trouble.  Present mic Techincally also has a section of smaller groups of mages in a specific area of the city that he is expected to represent to the council as a whole, like a provincial governor to the Larger government. 

The Cabal: 

The smallest group of Mages, these are chosen pact bound relationships that in theory are completely chosen by the mages in question. They tend to have 3-5 members, with the idea being 5 members, 1 from each path.  That doesn’t mean that single path cabals don’t exist, they just aren’t considered ideal. 

Cabals are supposed to be formed around an idea or goal all members have, though most do it for resources or companion ship. 

When formed a cabal pledge an oath towards each other to bind them together. It’s very much like a mutual adoption thing, or a forming of a pack. 

They have roles, like people who go out and get everyone fed, or the scribe of the group, or the tender of the magical items, but most modern day Cabals only assign them to give a sense of whose in charge in that area. They expect everyone in the cabal to pitch in if they can. 

This is seen as a family unit. That means nothing, not the Order or path, can ask you in good faith to betray them . Arrows will not be charged to attack their own, Guardians never are asked to report on them, etc. 

This also means that taking a lover in this group is at some very basic level, considered weird. It can, with some more traditional types, cause you to be looked down on, but It’s not something most younger mages bat an eyelash at. 

Facts and figures: 

1 in 100,000 people successfully awaken  to a watch tower or through the Exarchs

Of the three groups the lowest number of people are in the Pentacle, followed by the nameless, and then the Seers are the most. 

There are further subgroups with in the nameless, such as people who worship the Abyss, those who came back “wrong” and others who want to purge the world of all magic. 

If you have any clarifications I have missed @freezesunshinebreeze or even further questions please feel free to ask! 

[dccomicsnews]

John Barrowman is regarded as something of a National Treasure in the U.K. The Scottish born actor and singer is a household name due to decades worth of work on both stage and screen. He’s been a leading man in the West End – our Broadway – and in the  legendary British sci-fi shows Doctor Who and Torchwood, where he played the heroic Captain Jack Harkness. He’s also a successful author, having written audio adventures, novels and even the Malcolm Merlyn comic for DC.

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These days, he is known worldwide as the villainous Malcolm Merlyn from Arrow and DC’s Legends Of Tomorrow.

It’s A Kind Of Magic

He recently appeared at the first ever Heroes & Villains FanFest over in London, where he received a real hero’s welcome. DC Comics News was there to capture all the action, laughter and wardrobe changes. Mr. Barrowman has never been shy, he hit the stage wearing a flowery blue dress over Doctor Who themed TARDIS leggings and sporting white high heels. Vintage Barrowman! A stark contrast to the Dark Archer from the DC Universe. Oh… those rambunctious Thespians.

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The actor sang, danced, joked and entertained for a solid hour. He also answered questions from the fans – including a certain London based DC Comics News roving reporter. I could have written pages and pages on all the Doctor Who and Torchwood related questions, but the name of this website is DC Comics News, so I’ve stayed within the realms of his work within Arrow, DC’s Legends Of Tomorrow and the musical episode of The Flash.

Here are some of the highlights:

JB – Hello London! I’m hoooooome!

Listen, what I’d like to do is… I’d like to go to questions. If you’d like to (ask) some questions please do, as I like to feed off of you. I’m that way inclined, I’m like a vampire.

Fan – What would be your choice of death on the TV show? If you could write the script, how would you write yourself out?

JB – Well she’s just given the plot away, hasn’t she? What would be my choice of death? I don’t know… having sex!

(Raucous laughter and applause)

Fan – You’ve played hero and villain, as Captain Jack and Malcolm Merlyn. Which do you prefer playing?

JB – I don’t answer “Favorite” questions, because once I decide and say what it is, you guys never let me change my mind ever again, right? For me, what’s great about what I do is that you guys come on a journey with me. from Doctor Who being a hero, to Torchwood getting into trouble and even being a little bit of a bad guy sometimes, then to playing Malcolm Merlyn and being a complete villain… that’s what’s thrilling for me as an actor. I get to wake up every morning and go to set and do all of these different kinds of things. It was really easy being Captain Jack and being a hero, but what surprised me most, is when I started playing Malcolm Merlyn it was really easy being bad, I had no problem getting into it. It’s so much fun just to be a total A hole.

Fan – With Earth 2 and the parallel versions of characters, would you like to play a different version of Merlyn?

JB – That was, like, encapsulated in the musical episode of The Flash, which was AWESOOOOOOME! Loved it! I sent an email and said that if you don’t have me in it, you’re stupid!

I’ve never thought about his life in an alternate universe. However, on Legends of Tomorrow, we have the Spear of Destiny, so if he could change reality I think he’d like his old life back. He wants his plane back, he wants his fancy cars, he wants his hand, the life, the wealth, the power. He doesn’t want to keep living his life in the shadows. I think that’s what he’d want.

But if you really want to know Malcolm’s back-history, and the back-story, my sister and I wrote the Malcolm Merlyn comic-book for DC, and that is Malcolm’s lore and story for THE REST OF TIME! Which thrills me to bits. So that to me is what his alternate reality would be. To have what he once had, back in season one and season two.

It’s at this point during the Q&A that your mild-mannered reporter licked his pencil, picked up his note pad and got ready to record the facts.

DC Comics News – The question I want to ask you, as you’ve been thrown hundreds of questions over time – and you’re not shy…

JB – No. (laughter from John and the crowd)

DCN – What’s a question you’ve always wanted to be asked? What’s something you want known that no-one’s ever asked you about?

JB – Wow.

I have been asked loads of questions, I do love the questions and I love to talk. (loud laughter from the audience) I mean… I do. Sometimes it’s hard to shut me up! It’s nice to answer questions about things that I like? Not many people know that I’m a big fan of cars, I like to tinker with cars and like to fix them… (points at blue dress) it shows, right? (giggling)

I cook, I love to cook. I don’t know if I’m a very good cook, Scott (John’s husband) says I am… I never really even taste it first.

(Laughs from John and the crowd)

Those kind of questions. It’s nice to have questions that are different sometimes. So, listen, thanks. That’s why it’s a thrill for me to do these shows, because I like to talk about those things.

DCN – That’s great. You should be able to talk about those things. Everyone knows about John Barrowman the performer, it’s nice to learn about John Barrowman, the man. Thank you.

JB – Thank you!

That question is one I like to throw out there. Sometimes the interviewee has an answer straight away, sometimes  – like with John – it throws them for a few seconds. It’s a question I asked a few of the celebrities I spoke to over the weekend with some fantastic, and surprising results.

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The fate of Merlyn in the Berlantiverse

JB – Malcolm (should possibly) go to jail for a little while, he does his time… and then to come back to Star City and help Oliver. Rather than him coming to Oliver for help, he helps and doesn’t have to do it in secrecy or privacy, and they could be open about having that sort of relationship.

If they wanted me to, yes, I would (do more episodes as Ra’s Al Ghul). I loved being Ra’s and, in fact – don’t tell them – but I kept the ring! When you see it going down in that thing, and it’s melting, it didn’t really melt. It was going down in the water, it looked really cool, right? So when it was down there and they said “Ok, yeah, we’ve got that scene. Move on… ” I went (mimes putting his hand in the water and sneakily pocketing the ring).

Fan – We’ve had Wells some back in The Flash as a hero rather than a villain, is there any chance that we could see Merlyn come back, within The Flash universe as a hero, rather than as a villain?

JB – I don’t know. It’s not up to me, it’s up to the creators and the writers. But you can ask!

So, there we have it. After 5 years playing Merlyn, it looks as though the character has had his swan song… but looks can be deceiving. The questions raised by the fans re: alternate universe versions, a reformed and penitent version, or even the return of the villain we love to hate leading the League Of Assassins, all still mean there’s plenty of scope for the character to come back.

You can’t keep a good bad guy down, so nobody knows for sure what surprises the future may yet hold for John Barrowman within the DC Multiverse.

Merlyn Casts His Spell – Live in London With John Barrowman John Barrowman is regarded as something of a National Treasure in the U.K. The Scottish born actor and singer is a household name due to decades worth of work on both stage and screen.

[nh935]

Creepy America Episode 4: Red Like Roses

Creepy America

Episode 4

“Red Like Roses”

Hurricane, West Virginia

Over the years, Zoey and I have faced a lot of dangers filming “Creepy America”. Towards the end, it came to be expected that an episode would threaten our lives in some way. It should have been anticipated; after all, “Creepy America” was the equivalent of regularly poking a starving bear with a stick to see what happened. But before we adjusted to it, it was harrowing. Considering some of the things we went through, it’s a miracle that we even decided to keep working on the show at all. And while we had a few close calls with “Worlds of Wonder” and “The Things We Leave Behind”, it was during the episode “Red Like Roses” that the danger of what we were doing truly sank in for both of us.

***

We had just left Ohio and had made our way into West Virginia. Our last two episodes were edited and ready to upload, but Zoey insisted that we wait a week before uploading the first episode (second if you’re counting “Worlds of Wonder”, I suppose) so that we could use the two episode buffer to try to keep a regular update schedule. In the meantime, whoever wasn’t driving was using the trip time to promote the show online: we set up the website and put a countdown on it, updated the youtube channel with “Worlds of Wonder” on it, and made official social media accounts to start talking about it. Zoey had also edited together a trailer to post, made with clips from our previous three episodes. It didn’t make too many waves, but we got enough bites to keep our spirits up.

As I passed the sign letting me know I had crossed state lines, Zoey was on youtube, refreshing the page with the trailer on it and reading comments to me.

“Oh, here’s another one! ‘Cool idea. Effects could use a little work, though.’”

“They think it’s fake?” I asked.

“I guess so.”

“Doesn’t that bother you?”

She thought about it, then shrugged. “Not really. I mean, if they like the show, who cares, right?”

“I guess.” A brief silence fell over the R.V.

“What’s wrong about that?” Zoey asked.

“Huh? About what?”

“The show. Why does it bother you if people think it’s fake?”

I sighed. “It’s just, I don’t know, doesn’t it seem like we’re doing our audience a disservice by letting them think it’s not real?”

“Why’s that?” she asked.

“Well, if they think it’s not real, then they don’t know to look out for it.”

“Look out for it?”

“Yeah, they won’t think it’s a threat.”

“Why would they have to worry about it?”

I could feel my face getting red. “Well, I mean, like what if they come across it in real life? Wouldn’t they not know what to do?”

“But if they saw the episode, wouldn’t they still know? I mean, they wouldn’t think it’s fake if it was right in front of them.”

“I guess not. Nevermind.” I saw a sign for the upcoming towns and exits. “Hey, Hurricane. Isn’t that our next stop?”

“Hmm? Oh, yeah! Hold on a sec.” She flipped open her laptop and started reading off directions for the nearest R.V. park.

***

The R.V. park was a sight that was becoming increasingly familiar: a set of parallel roads with long parking spots set in the middle of a grassy field. I backed into a spot and began hooking up the various utilities to the corresponding tubes and plugs while Zoey left to pay for our stay and ask some questions about the town over.

I had just sat down inside the R.V. to rest when Zoey came back. She entered, flopped something on the table, and began rifling through drawers.

“What is this?” I asked, turning over an old black composition notebook, weathered and worn, in my hands.

“No idea. I found it in some woods not too far away.” Zoey said, plopping down our large over-the-shoulder camera. “But did you see what’s inside?”

I stared at her with an eyebrow raised, then opened the cover. Inside were the words ‘Jenny Walsh, English Notebook, 3rd Grade’ scratched through with one long line. Underneath in much larger letters read: ‘Jenny Walsh’s Notebook of Curses and Spells, TOP SECRET!’ I looked back up to see Zoey mounting the large equipment on a tripod. “Wait, we’re not trying to do an episode on this, are we?”

She glanced from behind the equipment. “Why not?”

“Because it’s a kid’s notebook. It’s probably just full of nonsense words and drawings of Patronuses. The only place this thing will work is on the playground.”

She shrugged. “Then we scrap the footage or put it in the bloopers.”

“But still, a kid’s notebook?”

Zoey ignored me and finished placing the cameras around: one positioned at each of us, and one to capture us both sitting at the small booth in the R.V. Hitting a button on the laptop, she sat down across from me. “So, do you want to try doing the introduction this time?”

I shook my head. “You are so much better at doing those.”

“Alright then,” she said. “Three, two, one, and… Hello ladies and gentlemen, and welcome back to Creepy America. We’re in Hurricane, West Virginia today, a state with more local legends and lore than anyone else, it seems. In fact, this state is so full of darkened corners that we seem to have found something after being here for only a few hours.”

“Yeah, something.” I mumbled.

Zoey shot me a look of annoyance. “I found this in the woods around our R.V. park. As you can see” she said, flipping open the book to the first page, “it seems to be a homemade spellbook of some kind. We’re going to find out if it actually works.” She started turning pages. As she did, her brow furrowed and she squinted her eyes. “Rog… rojol… I can’t read this, it’s all in cursive.”

I sighed and outstretched my arm. Zoey handed it over to me.

I looked down at the pages. “Royal… Command. A charm and mind control spell, done in the form of ‘hanc vitam diligere plus quam se’. Strange.” I turned the next page. “Gilded Heart. A spell for acquiring riches. ‘Midas non indiget familia’.” I started flipping through page after page. “These are written like… I don’t know, some kind of medieval spellbook.”

Zoey hopped up on her seat so she could lean over and look at the pages. “What are you waiting for? Try one.”

I looked back down at the page I had stopped at. “Red like Roses, a death curse to put on your worst enemies, created in the style of ‘sanguis liberate’.” I glanced up, eyebrows raised.

She just gave me a look of ‘go on, read it’.

I shrugged and began reading aloud. “Based on the Hecate school of spellcasting. Needs no components; words alone are enough. Read the following loudly and clearly:

Red like roses, blue like breath White like snow, black like death I have been wronged, o demon lords My enemy lives, so draw your swords I call upon the dark and wrong To right me as I sing this song Red like roses, blue like fate White like cold, black like hate For all the things that gave me pains Deserve not the blood in their veins Liberate it now, let it flow free I ask you this on bended knee Red like roses, blue like chill White like flesh, black like swill I do affirm this as my will Use my eyes, make me kill

After reading, the next person the spellcaster sees will be affected by the curse, so be careful. Best read when the person you want to kill is nearby. A good stealth spell.”

I blinked a few times, then slowly put the book down. “Well, even if it was fake, that was certainly creepy. Especially in a kid’s notebook.” I looked back up at Zoey. “ I mean, what has to happen to you to…”

Zoey suddenly stopped smiling. Her eyes went wide and her hand went to her throat.

“Zoey…”

She started coughing. Horrible, gasping guttural sounds, bereft of air, filled the room.

I flung the notebook to the side of the room and flew over to her side of the table. “Zoey, hang on. Hold on, I just… I…”

She looked at me with bug eyes for a second, then the face of panic was replaced with a wide smile. She started laughing. “Liam… your face....”

I stood up. “You… you’re an ass.”

“Yeah, I know.” She grinned and walked over to the notebook and picked it up. “Guess someone’s not as skeptical as they’d like you to believe, huh?”

“Shut up.”

***

While we were excited to explore West Virginia so that we could find more subject matter for “Creepy America”, we were in Hurricane specifically for “Faces of America”. We still had to keep that project going, and that meant interviewing as many different demographics of people as possible. Zoey liked the area because “it’s the perfect example of small-town podunkville, complete with weird pronunciation.”

Her words, not mine.

Surprisingly, quite a few people took us up on our little project. I guess people will jump at the chance to ramble on about themselves. Even the store owners on Main Street were willing to let us interrupt their work day so we could needle them with questions.

We were at the local hardware store, talking to the large man behind the counter, listening to him go on about high school dances or railroads or… something. I can’t remember what. Zoey always managed to approach each interview with enthusiasm and rabid interest; I had problems just staying awake.

“...so that’s when I bought the place. This place is… well, it’s part of the landscape, as much as the trees or the mountains or even the sky itself. To let ‘em tear it down, it’d be akin to blasphemy, I’d reckon. We’d lose a piece of our souls.”

I remember that part, because I had a hard time stopping myself from rolling my eyes so hard they’d pop out of my skull. For heaven’s sake, the place sold nails. If Zoey was thinking the same, she didn’t let it show. “Wow. That’s quite a story there.”

The man beamed with pride.

“Well, thank you so much for your time, it was truly a pleasure.” She moved her hand horizontally through the air, a signal she gave to me when she wanted me to stop recording. “Thank you again for sharing your tale with us, we really do appreciate it.”

“No problem. To be honest, it was kind of fun.”

Placing the camera onto the ground, I started to collapse the tripod, only to hear a rustling sound. I looked down to see a sheet of orange and white paper, dirty and torn from residing on the ground, no doubt.

Curious, I bent down and picked it up. At the top of the page was “AGATHA SORIN'S GUIDE TO MAKING YOUR OWN SPELL!” in big bold letters. Cartoon witches with green skin smiled in the corners, while the page contained nonsense syllables and instructions on how to combine them.

The man saw me holding the page. “Oh! Sorry about that. Must’ve been a leftover from the Halloween activity books. A few of those pages always manage to hide before I can staple ‘em all together.”

“Agatha Sorin?” I asked, pointing to the name.

“Just an ol’ folktale. Accordin’ to legend, she was one of the first witches in Salem to be convicted, but before they could burn ‘er, she escaped. People say she made it here and spent the rest of her life up in a log cabin near Deadbear Falls.” He chuckled. “Some city folks came ‘round and disproved it all a few years ago, but that doesn’t keep ‘er from being a local celebrity every Halloween.”

Zoey and I looked at each other.

“Any chance you could tell us where this Deadbear Falls is?” she asked.

***

Deadbear Falls turned out to be a small creek that ran down a hill, situated deep in the thick West Virginian woods.

The forest it ran through was cold and quiet, the October air creating a soft hush on everything. Leaves covered the ground, but they had lost most of their vibrant oranges and reds since falling, instead taking on various shades of brown matching the dirt beneath. Our trek was only punctuated by the babbling of the small stream and the shuffling of disturbed foliage.

Otherwise, there was nothing up here. Especially not a log cabin.

I sighed. “So much for that.”

“He did say it got disproved a few years ago.” Zoey said, walking ahead of me. “At least it’s pretty. We could use this for woAH!” Suddenly she was on the  ground, face buried in leaves. I rushed over and helped her up.

“I’m okay, I’m okay” she muttered, sitting herself up.

“What happened?” I asked.

“Dunno. Foot caught on something.” She kicked towards a pile of leaves, and as her foot pushed them aside, we both heard a dull ‘thunk’.

We looked at each other, then started throwing handfuls of leaves away.

It was a small metal footlocker, black paint peeling away, replaced by spots of rust. In one corner was the name “Jenny Walsh”.

“Zoey…”

“Yeah, I see.”

We sat in silence for a while.

I put my fingers under the box lid and began to pull up. The lid rattled around a bit and there was a dull groaning sound of something being strained inside.

“Wait, Liam, that’s somebody…”

All of a sudden, the lid flew open with a resounding “POP!” and I fell backwards, catching myself as I did.

“Huh. Lock must be rusted away. This thing’s been out here for a long time.” Zoey looked at me, then reached into the box. She came out with a small bundle of black fibers, wrapped together with a red string. “What is this, a lock of hair?”

I reached inside as well, withdrawing tiny gleaming metal cufflinks, necklace pieces, and even a few forks. “Silver?”

I looked back over to Zoey. She was holding tiny pieces of chalky white items, long like sticks but far more smooth. “Liam, these are…”

“...animal bones” I finished. I hesitated for a moment, then put the items back into the metal footlocker. “Let’s leave these here. I don’t really like this, Zoey. We should head back to the R.V. and…” I turned back to her and stopped.

There was a small trickle of crimson coming from her nose.

A trickle of blood.

***

“You’re overreacting, Liam.”

Instead of heading to the nearest doctor like I insisted, we were seated in a booth at the local diner. There were only a few people besides us in the yellow-white building, which was just as well; I kept noticing the others making side-long glances at us while they thought we weren’t looking.

It was no doubt because of Zoey. She had her head tilted forward, a bundle of white paper held to her nose. Dotting the table were more bunches of paper, stained crimson with blood, and a large roll of cheap toilet paper next to Zoey’s right. The waitress had brought it out after apologetically telling us there “weren’t no tissues”.

“I mean, of all the people to freak out over a nosebleed, you are the last on my list.” She withdrew the bundle of paper, saw that had too much blood soaked through to be serviceable, and put it aside, unwrapping another length of toilet paper and wadding it up.

I looked at the paper now stained red. Red like roses.

I tore myself away from the tissue to look at Zoey. “You can’t tell me that you think that this isn’t weird, right?”

“This isn’t weird” she huffed. “Remember Griffith Park?”

I sat back in my seat a bit. When we were both in fifth grade, our class had gone on a field trip to the Griffith Park Train Museum. While we were waiting on the bus for our teacher to come back from the ticket counter, Zoey’s nose started bleeding. Some of the other kids started freaking out, and one of the girls told Zoey to pinch her nose and tilt her head back so that she wouldn’t start losing blood. Zoey, who had been pretty calm up to this point, shrugged and did so. After a minute, she complained about her stomach feeling funny.

Another minute passed, and she vomited up blood all over the bus floor.

The scene our teacher came back to was one of mass panic, bus driver included. To her credit, she handled everything well, even when Zoey had quietly asked if she was going to die. Obviously she didn’t, but she was attended to by ambulance paramedics who had to get the story about what had happened out of a bunch of freaked-out kids. When they did hear it, they calmed down and let our teacher know there was nothing wrong.

Turns out that you’re not supposed to hold your head back during a nosebleed. The blood will just go to the stomach, and because the stomach can’t digest blood, it’ll vomit it back out when too much gets in there.

Hence why Zoey was bent over and talking more to the table than to me.

“Alright, fine.” I conceded. “But after what happened this morning, we can’t take any chances.”

“What are you…” A sudden look of realization crossed her face. “Oh come on.”

“The spell said ‘the next person you look at’. That was you. And remember those words? ‘Sanguis Liberate’? I looked it up. It’s Latin for ‘free the blood’.”

“Liam, it was a kid’s notebook.”

“A kid who buries hair and animal bones out in the woods, apparently.”

“Yeah, fine. It’s a disturbed kid’s notebook. But not a witch-in-training.”

“Why not? There’s stories of witches all over early America in locations like this. There’s even a witch who relocated here.”

“Alright, first off, we were told that that legend was disproved by one of the locals. Not exactly accurate, now is it? And secondly, most of those stories of early witches ended up with them getting burnt alive. Something tells me if they did have some actual mojo, those stories would have ended differently.”

I stayed silent for a bit. “But… the timing…”

“What, you mean late Fall, early Winter? The time when the air is driest and my nose always bleeds?” She sighed. “Look, I appreciate the concern, I really do, but I’m fine. I swear. See?” She held up the last bundle of paper, much less red than white. “It’s stopped already.”

I looked at her for a few moments, the slouched. “Alright, sorry. I guess you’re right. I was just…”

“Y’all ready to order?” the waitress asked, coming around to our table.

“Damn right I am. I’m starving.” Zoey said.

I pushed some of the bloody tissues away from me with a straw. “I think I’ll just stick with coffee, thanks.”

***

Fifteen minutes later, we were walking through a house with a tiny old widow and I was beginning to question my liberal use of the bottomless coffee deal. I had loaded up on caffeine to keep myself awake through the next round of interviews, but my body didn’t quite like the fact that I had downed cup after cup without real food, and it was rebelling by making my hands shake something fierce.

On top of that, the house was narrow, with hallways thin and small. We had left the cozy three or four rooms the widow regularly used and now were traveling through areas of the house she hadn’t gone through in years: corridors dusty with age and rooms filled with long forgotten memorabilia. The twilight had a hard time penetrating inside, making the shadows dark and deep. No heat filled this area, she had the vents blocked off, so I could feel the cold drafts of air brush against my skin as I awkwardly high stepped around tables and boxes.

All while trying to keep that damn camera still.

“We were doing our best to survive, but it wasn’t easy. William’s leg had forced him into disability and that money barely kept us afloat. Then Nixon announced the draft, and Kenny had to go to Vietnam. Just like that. He never came back.”

A few steps went on in silence. Zoey didn’t like to talk during these interviews; she said that her presence was supposed to be “as invisible as possible”.

We arrived in a small room, boxes stacked into corners with black sharpies. “These are his things” she said with a sigh. “I was supposed to give most of this away, but by the time I could finally face these items… well, it didn’t seem so important.”

She picked up a small pocket knife, unfolded it, and handed it over to Zoey. She took the blade almost reverently, looking it up and down, dancing her fingertips on the edge.

“Ow!”

She hissed and withdrew her hand. A small bead of blood was forming on the tip of her index finger.“Oh my,” the old lady said. “Hold on just one moment, I’ve got a kit in the kitchen…”

“No need” Zoey said, reaching into the camera bag. She withdrew a small box and undid some wrappings. “Got band-aids right here. If you don’t mind, though, could Liam and I grab those folding chairs in your kitchen? I’d really appreciate it if we could sit and discuss some of these items, and I think my cameraman could use the break.”

“Well, if you’re sure… I suppose I wouldn’t mind a little sit down.”

“Thanks. We’ll be right back.”

As we walked, Zoey tore off the little papers and stuck them in her pocket.

“Thank you” I whispered.

“No problem. I know how heavy those things get” she replied.

I looked back down to her hand. “Zoey, are you sure…”

She flashed me a look of annoyance that said don’t you dare bring up that stupid spell now, we’ve finally filming something good.

I stayed quiet.

We arrived back in the kitchen area, Zoey grabbing a folding metal chair while I picked up two more. “After this, I’m not sure how much more we need to film, Liam. I mean honestly, this old woman could fill up a movie herself.”

She stepped in front of me, leading the way. As she did, I heard a wet, dripping sound, and I looked down.

There was a trail of the stuff. I’m not kidding, an actual trail. At the front of it was the Band-Aid, soaked in red, floating in the liquid like a leaf in a pond. Leading onwards was a small trickle, a miniature macabre river, flowing. Literally flowing, like water. I could see the small ripples of motion in it, rushing forward as it pooled and pushed past in that strange jerky way liquid does when it runs over new ground for the first time.

I had never seen so much blood.

She turned around and smiled at me. Holy shit, I thought, I can actually see her turning white.

“Maybe it could be a short, y’know? We should go over what we have scheduled, if she…” she stopped and furrowed her brow at me.

I was so stunned I could barely speak. “Zoey… your…”

She looked down at her hand, seeing the flood of scarlet coating the chair and slowly dribbling its way down to the floor.

She whispered a very soft “oh”, and fainted.

***

It didn’t take long for the ambulance to arrive. My tone of voice on the phone probably assured that. 

I was riding in the back with the paramedics, watching in horror. It was unreal. Most of their time was spent winding and unwinding gauze; it seemed like as soon as they finished securing the hand in cloth, they had to undo it, cotton useless as it became dirty and dripping with blood. The frenzy of activity had smeared a good portion of it on the walls and medical equipment. The floor was slick with it. Once or twice one of them had to catch himself from falling.

How much was in there, I wondered, and how much could she afford to lose? I felt numb and sick to my stomach all at the same time.

“Sir? Sir!” one of them snapped at me.

“Huh, yes? What?”

“Do you know if she has any blood disorders?”

“Any… no, none.”

“What about medication? Any blood pressure, heart regulation, aspirin?”

“No, no. None of that.”

“Are you sure, sir? Any chance?”

“I’ve known her for all my life. There’s nothing.” I stared at her, then asked in almost a whisper “what’s happening to her?”

The man only gave me back a look of pure dread and confusion. It was the kind of look an atheist would have gave after seeing the devil.

***

Two minutes later and I was in the hospital waiting room. I had tried to follow Zoey as she was rushed around one hallway and then another, but I had been pushed back by an old but insistent nurse and deposited into this empty sitting room, a musty yellow and brown place buzzing with fluorescents. I had gotten a styrofoam cup from the coffee machine and sat in one of the chairs, mindlessly tearing it into tiny pieces.

I couldn’t relax. I couldn’t even think. All I could do was let the worry and dread sink onto my shoulders, becoming heavier and heavier and heavier.

Finally, a man in a lab coat came through the double doors. I shot up and walked over to him.

“What’s going on? Is Zoey…”

“Calm down” the doctor said. “She’s stable, at least, for now. We managed to stop the bleeding and get a blood transfer going, but she’s still pretty weak. To be expected, really, considering how much of it she lost.”

“Do you know what’s happening to her?” I asked softly.

“We were hoping you could help us out with that, Mr. Foster. On the ambulance ride over, you said that she didn’t have any blood disorders, correct?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“Are you sure? Hemophilia, anemia, sickle cell… anything?”

“No, nothing. I’ve known her since we were kids, she’s never been diagnosed with any of that stuff.”

“What about other medical conditions? Has she ever been diagnosed with high blood pressure or hypertension?” I shook my head. “Has she been prescribed any blood thinners?” Another shake. “Has she recently taken any aspirin or alcohol?” Shake.

His shoulders slumped a bit and he wrote down some notes on his clipboard.  “Have she taken any… illicit substances lately?”

“What? No.”

He stared at me.

“She hasn’t,” I said with a glare.

He nodded, jotting down more notes.

“What’s happening to her?”

He sighed, then looked back at me. “We’ve... diagnosed her with Sudden Onset Hemophilia.”

I looked at him, then scoffed.“Sudden Onset? What, like a fucking cold? You don’t just develop blood disorders. Especially genetic ones.”

“Mr. Foster,” he said, voice becoming clipped and sharp, “we are doing the best we can with limited information. Now unless you have any suggestions...:”

“Red like roses.”

“What was that?”

“Nothing, nothing. I… I suppose you’re right.” My voice went even quieter. “Is she going to make it?”

He stayed silent for a few moments. “Honestly? We don’t know. She’s responsive, which is a good sign, but she’s weak, and the body can only handle so much. Right now, all we can do is wait and see.”

“Right… yeah… wait and see…”

“You can see her now, if you’d like. Please try not to excite her; the best thing for her is calm and rest.”

“Yeah… calm… got it…” I ignored the doctor, pushing open the doors and heading to the right.

There she was, lying in bed, paler than a sheet of paper, tubes hooked up to her nose and a red bag snaking its way into her vein. The room was devoid of sound, save for the soft beeping and whirring of machines. Her eyes fluttered open with effort, as if weights were attached to them, and she grinned in a weak, grimacing way.

“Hey, guess you were right about that whole spell thing, huh? Get to say I told you so.” She tried to force a chuckle, but it quickly turned into a coughing fit.

I said nothing, just sat down in the chair next to her and held her hand.

“Well, this is certainly embarrassing. Cursing myself. Makes for a good episode, though, right? I’m sure we’ll laugh about it once…”

“It’s not going away” I muttered. “It’s not going to go away.”

She stopped and turned to me, eyes wide. “W-what?”

“They diagnosed you with hemophilia, Zoey. It’s a permanent disorder; the platelets in your blood aren’t working. It’s not clotting.”

The weak smile came back. “Well, I’m sure they can fix it, if they know…”

“They can’t. It’s a genetic disorder. It’s in your DNA now. Even if they save you, your life has permanently changed. Any cut will be an emergency. Any injury will be life-threatening. You’ll have to live your life defensively, checking yourself. Protecting yourself. Worrying.”

The silence fell back into the room. Tears began to fall down Zoey’s face.

I rose to my feet. “It’s alright. I’m going to fix this.”

She clutched my hand tighter, trying to force me back. “Liam, don’t leave me alone.” I could feel how feeble the grip had become. “I’m scared. Please.” 

Her hands shook so much. 

“I have to. The doctors, they don’t know what happened. Wouldn’t believe me if I told them. They can’t fix it, so I’ll have to.” I gave her hand a small squeeze. “Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon. Everything will be fine. We’ll even laugh about this, I promise.”

“Liam!” I heard her cry, but I was already hurrying down the hallway.

***

I slammed the door to the R.V. open, hard enough to knock down the cheap wall clock hanging on the adjoining wall. “Alright Jenny…” I grabbed the notebook and began flipping through pages, “tell me how to fix this.”

I read as fast as humanly possible. “Lilith’s Kiss- to turn someone into a snake. Unluck on That! A curse to give your enemy misfortune. Night Air. An invisibility spell. Fetch’s Lullabye- a spell to inflict nightmares.”

“RRRGH!” I flung the book to the other side of the R.V., papers flying through the air with the force of the throw. As I collapsed into a chair, I noticed one of the papers by my feet. I picked it up and read it.

“Red like Roses, a death curse to put on your worst enemies, created in the style of ‘sanguis liberate’. Based on the Hecate school of spellcasting.” I stopped. “Based on the Hecate school…” I mumbled, “of course!”

I slammed the door open again and ran for my car.

***

All eyes were on me when I flung the door of the Hurricane Public Library open. They must have been expecting someone to enter dramatically; no doubt they heard the screeching of my tires when I flew in.

The small building was cramped, shelves forming narrow aisles labeled by subject. Bright lights overhead illuminated dozens of books stacked neatly on each row.

“Excuse me, sir, you can’t just...” the elderly librarian behind a barcode-scanning gun began. I ignored her and scanned the paper signs at the end of each aisle that organized the information by subject.

Jenny’s spells worked, no doubts about that. But how had she created a fully functioning spellbook? She sure wasn’t taught by any witch; the only source of witchcraft around here was Agathia Sorrin, an obvious fake. A small town like this would be buzzing with rumors if anyone else practiced something similar, and we hadn't heard anything like that while letting them prattle on about themselves. And she didn’t have inside information, either. She had hidden her little box at Deadbear Falls, a location that was a good hike outside of town. Jenny must have had to have gone there for a reason. She was probably looking for Agithia’s cabin. Maybe that’s even why she hid the box there; she thought the location was arcane or something.

Her notebook had also been written in cursive. That meant that she was in school at a time when cursive was still important enough to be taught, i.e., a time before computers handled most of our informational needs. No internet for Jenny. That left only one place where she could have learned how to cast magic, the original sum of human knowledge: the library.

I found the section titled “Parapsychology and Occultism” and started running my finger along book spines, looking for something about witches.

The librarian stood at the end of the bookshelf. “Sir, please...” I didn’t respond.

Most libraries work on computers now, including this one. That’s why that little barcode gun was at the front counter. But before they did that, they used paper, and part of that process was to stamp a date and time of check-out and write the person’s name in a little card inside the book cover; that way, if anyone damaged the book, they knew who to blame. Most have gotten rid of or lost the cards a while ago. After all, why protect something that’s no longer necessary? But if the town wasn’t big, if the library wasn’t used often, if I just had just a little bit of luck…

My finger rested on a large hardcover. “The Encyclopedia of Witchcraft”. I dragged the book down and cracked it open.

There, on the first page, was a tiny paper pocket. Inside was a small card, with neat letters that spelled out “Jenny Walsh, 3-18-88”

I sighed with relief. “Thank heavens for small-town podunkville.”

I tossed the book over to a nearby table, where it landed with a heavy “WHUMP!” I pulled out more books and flipped the covers open, dropping those that didn’t have Jenny’s name and tossing the ones that did over with the Encyclopedia. Once I had gone through every book on witchcraft, I dashed over to the table, pushing past the librarian as I did so.

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave. You’re making a scene.”

I opened the Encyclopedia and turned to the table of contents, finding the section on “Spells”. I flipped the pages, hard enough to rip some and started scanning passages.

“...believed that incantations could curdle milk and…”

“...danced ritualistically around large pyres…”

“...contracts with devils, evidence left behind as moles…”

“...a list of herbs and other plants to be ground up, then…”

I closed the book hard enough to create a resounding “BANG” and shoved it to the floor. The librarian behind me gasped. “Now you’re damaging the books!”

Without looking at her, I withdrew my wallet and threw it at her. I heard a gasp of surprise and frustration as it hit her, and then footsteps stomping away.

I picked up the next book and opened it to the table of contents, repeating the process over and over again with each one.

“Familiars, in the form of small animals…”

“...accusations in public court…”

“...a magic salve rubbed over brooms…”

“...able to curse people from miles away…”

“...blamed for the deaths of loved ones taken away by sickness…”

I closed another book and slid it off the table. It was empty now; that was the last book on witches that Jenny had checked out, and not a single one held any answers for me.

I banged my head with the meat of my palms. “C’mon Liam, think! What else was there?”

Well, there were animal bones…

I bolted out of my seat, knocking over the chair, and ran to the shelves again. I had to search row by row to find what I wanted; I wasn’t sure what section it would be in, but eventually I found a large book titled “The Trapper’s Bible”. I flipped it open and took out the card.

There it was. Jenny had checked this book out three times in the span of one year.

So she used other books to supplement the occult books. She would have to if she wanted to find spell components. But the only ingredients in “Red Like Roses” were words.

I ran back to another section. “Language”. More spines.

“Latin: The Tongue That Won the West”

Open, pull down. No Jenny on the Card.

“History of Old English”

Skip.

“A Comparative Study of Germanic and…”

Skip.

“Silent Sounds: The Cultural Significance of Words”

Open, pull down. Jenny’s name, printed over seven times on the little card.

I ran back to the little table, pouring over the table of contents. “Religious Rites... Fairy Tales… where is it where is it…”

There, “Spells and Curses”. And underneath, “The Hecate School”

I had to grab the pages multiple times just to turn them. My hands had developed such fierce tremors that I had trouble just gripping them.

“The Hecate School was a discipline of magic that focuses on magic phrases spoken in rhyming couplets. Named after the Greek god of...”

I skipped ahead several paragraphs, trying to find the thing I wanted.

“...making the spells popular. Hecate spells have several elements in common; first, the spell is told in rhyme and rhythm. This is commonly done in iambic pentameter, but not always. Second, the spell should contain some common theme, of which the spell revisits in variations as it continues. Finally, the spell should appeal to a supernatural power. Demons and devils are most often invoked, though spells exist appealing to faeries and even angels.

Section VII- THE MACBEATH SCHOOL”

I stared at the book. “That’s it?” I slammed my fists into the table. “THAT’S IT?”

The few people who were still inside scurried off.

I sat in silence. My trail was cold.

What do I do now?

I felt a vibration from my pants pocket. Someone was calling.

I took my phone out. “Hello?”

“Mr. Foster? This is Hurricane General…”

“How is she?”There was a moment of stuttering on the other end. 

“She, uh, well… She’s not looking too good. We think it might be best to come back, just in case the worst comes to pass.”

I said nothing. My eyes were glued to the pages in front of me.

“Mr. Foster? Hello?”

“If Jenny could figure it out…”

“I’m sorry?” the voice on the phone asked.

“How much time can you give me?” I grabbed a near-by pencil and strip of paper, left in convenient bunches at the center of each table.

“What?”

“I said how much time can you give me? Before she goes critical?”

“Well, I’d highly suggest coming within the next twenty minutes…”

“That’ll have to do.” I hung up and bent over the paper, scribbling down my thoughts as quickly as they would come to me.

Bright as light and pure as snow That’s the Zoey I love and know A gift of happiness and joy As treasured as a child’s toy

I shook my head at the weird imagery, but kept going. No time to be a critic.

Bright as light and pure as snow But here on earth hurt by a foe Angels above, if you are good

“What the hell rhymes with good?” I thought for a second, then crossed the line out

Angels above, if you are upright Deliver her from evil tonight Bright as light and pure as snow

I stopped again. “Why did I have to pick fucking snow?” I grumbled. After an agonizing minute, I moved the pencil again.

Preserve the magic in her glow I beg you please, save her now Keep her alive, I don’t care how.

I stood up, looking over the poem. I took a deep breath, and in the loudest, clearest, most commanding voice I could muster, I read the words of my homemade spell. After finishing the last line, I dropped my speech down to a whisper. “Oh please, oh please oh please…”

The papers of the overturned books were rustled by a breeze. After that, there was nothing but silence and calm.

I stood back up and headed over to the library doors.

The older librarian was there, brandishing my wallet like a dagger at a nonplussed and slightly amused looking police officer. “He’s disturbing the peace! Criminal mischief! Assault!”

“By throwing money at you?”

I cleared my throat. The two turned and looked at me.

“I’ll make you a deal” I said to the officer. “Take me to the hospital, and you can arrest me after I check on someone there.”

***

I slowly walked back into the room. She was still lying there, eyes closed and motionless under the covers of the hospital bed. It seemed quieter than normal, and it took me a while to realize why: the oxygen tube and I.V. bag had been taken away, as well as most of the machinery. There was no medical systems supporting her any more.

I approached her bed. “Zoey?”

Her eyes fluttered open. “L-Liam?”

I threw my arms around her in a tight embrace.

***

The old nurse had shooed me out of the room after talking to Zoey for over fifteen minutes. I was approached by the doctor shortly after that. She’d made a full recovery, he told me. Their best guess was that she had accidentally ingested something that had been tainted by a massive amount of anticoagulants and the substance had just run its course.

I just smiled and thanked them for their expertise.

At this point, I had been running on adrenaline and caffeine for over ten hours with still no food in my system, and my body was letting me know it. I made my way over to the small vending machine and reached inside my pocket, only to remember that my wallet was still at the library.

I felt a small tap on my shoulder.

It was the officer from the library. He held out my wallet to me.

“Oh, thanks.” I took it. “Um, so about that promise…”

“You’re friends with the girl in room 12?” he asked. “The one who came in bleeding all over the place?”

“Yeah…”

“Whatever happened, whatever you did, I don’t want to know, but you’d better drift out the same way you came in.” Having said that, he turned and walked away.

I wished I had been with it more in that moment, or had known what I do now. Looking back on that memory, I can recognize the weariness in his face, the dull sheen of eyes that had seen too much. I wish I realized that he had witnessed something before. That he was the same weird breed of creature we were: those who know something they shouldn’t.

But I didn’t, and he left. I never saw him again.

***

“Quite a strange thing, isn’t it? Such power contained in something so small?”

It was night and the two of us were deep into the woods. Zoey was sitting on a log, illuminated by the light of a small campfire we had built. I was behind the large camera, standing it on its tripod once again, making sure Zoey’s words were being recorded.

She looked back down to the composition notebook held in her hands, several pages sitting in there loose. "Not hard to understand why we hated witches, is it? Such destructive forces, held back by only rhymes. And make no mistake, Jenny was a witch, and we’ll say goodbye to her the same way we’ve said goodbye to her kind for centuries.”

She took the notebook and dropped it into the flames. As she did, a breeze caught it and opened it, showing the paper turn black and curl.

“So the next time you damn something to hell, or curse someone for their actions, perhaps you should think twice about it, gentle viewer. Words have more weight than we give them credit for. Sometimes, much...much more.” She stared into the camera for a few seconds longer, then broke off and looked at me. “How was that? Too corny?”

I shook my head. “No, it was good.” I shut the camera off and walked around to the log, taking a seat next to Zoey. Together, we watched the fire crackle as the wispy ashes of the former notebook were swept up by the wind and carried away.

“There were worse ones in there” I said softly. “Ones designed to drive people mad, or kill everyone in their family but them. Quite a few that summoned monsters to torment people.”

Zoey shook her head. “What has to happen to you to do those things?”

“I don’t know.”

“I just wish you had your camera on you when you went to the library. I’m going to have to get creative to fill in that gap. We should probably invest in some tiny hand cameras, just so we have something filming.”

I stared at her. “Really? That’s what’s on your mind right now?”

“Better than the alternative” she muttered as another blackened page crumbled to soot.

The silence continued between us for a few more minutes.

“Zoey…” I began, “if we’re going to keep doing this, we need to be more careful.”

She turned to me. “Are you lecturing me?”

“And myself as well. After all, I was the one who picked ‘Red Like Roses’. I could have read any of them.” I poked one of the logs with a stick, turning it over in a shower of embers. “From now on, we have to treat anything we find like it’s dangerous. Even if it seems silly. And no more shrugging things off, like nose bleeds. If one of us is worried about it, we need to take it seriously.”

Zoey watched the fire. “Yeah. There should also have a ban on pranks and stuff. Make sure neither of us think the other is goofing around when something bad happens.”

“We should have a codeword of some kind, just in case. Something to say ‘hey, I’m in trouble. I need help now’.”

“What about Oxenfree?” she asked. It was the word we used when we were playing hide-and-seek and the other needed them to come out, usually because it was time to come home.

I nodded. “That’s a good one. We’ll use that.”

Another minute of quiet passed.

“Liam,” Zoey said, “I’m glad you came.”

“What, so I could curse you?”

She punched me in the arm .“Alright, Mr. Wise Guy, I’m not glad. There.” After giving me a second to rub my arm in mock distress, she rested her head on my shoulder. “Seriously, though. I am. It’s nice to know someone’s got your back.”

“And the same to you.” I said, enjoying the last of the flames as they began to die.

“The same to you.”