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optimist-pine · 2 years

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Hey there, today I got stress tested and, long story short, I have an extreme case of burnout. I’ve been having panic attacks, dissociating, puking a lot, and have been struggling with a chronic illness, deaths in the family, etc. I really hope this doesn’t sound too much like I’m just complaining. I would really appreciate it if you could do the rise boys with someone dealing with… that whole situation. Leo and Donnie are my favorite btw. Thanks!

A/n: That really sucks, Anon. Thanks for opening up and requesting this. I hope this meets your expectations, and I really hope it helps even the tiniest bit. Please let me know how you're doing. (Here's a hug from me to you (⁠⊃⁠｡⁠•́⁠‿⁠•̀⁠｡⁠)⁠⊃)

Word Count: 1,230

Warnings: Severe burnout and related symptoms

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Leo:

• He's acutely aware of the buildup leading to your burnout

• If you don't come to him by a certain point he's going to gently - but firmly - make you talk things out and tell him what's going on

• Some of these things he already knows about of course, but there are still things he hadn't realized were weighing so heavily on you

• He helps you to establish and maintain a better routine while still giving you space to accomplish things on your own

• Be prepared for lots of non-verbal reminders including:

• Him setting out personal care items to have a "spa time" every evening to unwind

• The smell of freshly steeped tea coming from an area that's already set up for morning meditation/yoga

• Recruiting Mikey to make healthy family meals where the group conversations are filled with laughter and hope

• Maybe the two of you will even find a project to invest in together that benefits others within the city

• Ninjitsu is an exceptional way to relieve some stress so be prepared for a lot of training

• You'll go up and practice on the rooftops where you can feel the breeze across your skin and hear the people and cars go past

• He'll guide you throughout the movements and encourage you to go without shoes to really feel the cement ground you through your feet

• He hopes, with time, that he can help you to slow down and process things in a way that doesn't allow the stress to overtake and overwhelm you because he hates seeing you so severely burnt out

• He will always be there to listen and he really values communication so please tell him what helps and what doesn't

Donnie:

• Donnie's been there once or twice before, though maybe not nearly as severe as what you're dealing with

• If you tend to withdraw, he's not going to let you go it alone

• He may not be the best talker or listener or all that great with even his own emotions, but he knows something is wrong and he wants to help

• He'll make sure you go and actually do things and get out of your head

• Maybe that means testing out new inventions or going around the city to study the engineering and architecture of the buildings

• Anything to just do something while simultaneously not doing much of anything

• He may also egg you on to play the dance machine they have in the arcade since the physical exertion is good for clearing the head

• He lets you in on his next big secret project, allowing you to not only name but customize its design and final look since that can be the most exciting part of the creation process

• And even though he doesn't feel very confident doing it, he'll try to get you to talk things out because it would really help him understand what's draining you if you outright told him

• He'll make sure you get to bed and get a good amount of sleep, but he also won't let you avoid getting up in the morning since he knows it won't help

• He starts beginning the day with you in conversation about what each of you is looking forward to, and ending the day with what made your day good/better

• Even though he feels like he's the worst at helping you through this, he understands how you feel more than any of his brothers do

Raph:

• Look, it doesn't matter if the issue is physical, mental, or emotional, but this guy's number one solution is cuddles

• Obviously they won't fix things on their own, but it's a good start

• Being in charge of his younger brothers, he understands what it's like to feel like so many things are out of your control that you just can't keep up

• He's going to encourage you to remove yourself from as many responsibilities as possible and take a break - a long one

• He's the best listener if you'll tell him what's going on, although he'll probably ask lots of questions to really understand

• He does a good job of subtly (and sometimes not so subtly) reminding you how valuable you are to himself and the others

• How just your presence is so vital in him keeping his head on straight, so he's going to be right by your side through the thick of it

• This guy's default setting is protective so he may tend to lean towards being overbearing

• He knows this so he'll really try his best not to be - if he seems really awkward or unsure of himself it's not because of you

• He'll probably convince you to box with him for the connection between mental focus and physical coordination and reflexes

• He'll encourage you to really feel the connection between your body and your soul, how each movement connects your physical posture with your mental posture

• Out of all of them, Raph has the most difficult time watching you go through this

• He tends to take everyone's burdens upon himself, and this time he can't, so you can be sure he's going to be doing a lot of little things for you

Mikey:

• Mikey is pretty in-tune emotionally and mentally, so he noticed the progression of things going from bad to worse before they were even bad

• He really, really wants to help and he wears his heart on his sleeve so you can see it in his face constantly

• He doesn't really understand what you're going through, and listening and talking through things isn't his strong suit, but he's a master distractor

• Everything you eat, everything you wear, and everything you do is going to have some added razzmatazz courtesy of Mikey

• He'll drag you out to tag buildings late at night, scour thrift stores for crazy outfits, or serve food at a homeless shelter

• His plans may not have a lot of rhyme or reason but he really wants you to step away from everything and just feel alive and connect with other people

• Laughter is the best medicine, right?

• He'll scrounge up a bunch of art supplies and recruit you to help him spruce up some dingy part of the lair because he's convinced it needs your personal touch

• He'll ask you to come hang on the rooftops for an evening and watch the stars - even if you can't see them in the city

• Moments like this he can actually slow down and focus, so he'll encourage you to talk and tell him what's up

• It scares him that you're not acting like yourself, but he also knows it's something out of your control so he doesn't want you to feel guilty

• He'll grab you and his boombox and go bust some moves on street corners in hopes you'll be filled with the buzz of a group of strangers all hitting a certain groove together

• Mikey cares deeply for you and he'll do whatever he can to help you heal

• He wants to see the sunshine come back into your life

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centipedelightning · 1 year

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Can we have some fluff headcanons for Mars x reader??

Mars my beautiful boy. I think in the future I should add something to my pinned post about being clear about relationship types. Like it's pretty standard for these things to be romantic but I'm aroace and autistic so I'm set up for failure. Thank you anon! Also, this was an excuse to catch up on the horrortale comic bc I needed to refresh Mars' character.

| ht!Sans x gn!Reader || Romantic headcanons || Fluff |

Great bonefriend let me tell you

He's very affectionate. Like, if you accept physical touch he is always there; holding hands when walking, knees touching when sitting next to each other, you name it. Any little touch of contact is everything to him.

He doesn't nap as much as classic Sans but if you blinked a little too slow you will be dragged off to lay in bed. He uses it as an excuse to nap and cuddle.

If you aren't a physical touch person he's probably doing something for you. He likes to keep his hands busy, so if he wasn't able to hold yours he'd make friendship bracelets or something similar. He doesn't like fidget toys because he feels there's no end. He likes having final products.

No matter your stance on physical contact, he will be doing and making for you whenever he gets the chance. I mentioned the friendship bracelets but he also sews, knits, and crochets. Real homestead like. You have hats, coats, and socks galore. Every gifting holiday ends with you getting something handmade by him.

On your fifth anniversary, he knit you a sweater. It's multi-colored with your best colors and an off-white accent on the collar and sleeves. There's very intricate patterns with some of your favorite things (food, animals, shapes, whatever sparks joy). It also has a 3d soul-heart pattern on the collar and cuffs. Blood, sweat, and tears went into it (the last two literally).

I don't think he has trust issues in the same way as someone from a fell!universe but he's got something. So to get into a relationship with him is a big deal. You'd need to be a very patient and understanding person. You need to be good or get good at clear, open communication as well.

The underground affected his empathy so you need to be direct about problems and explain whether or not you want advice or are just venting.

He has a very deadpan way of joking where you are unsure if what he said was a joke. Just ask and he'll clarify, he never says it with malicious intent.

He raises chickens on the surface and he'd be egg-static if you helped or took an interest. He made that specific pun the first time you ask to meat the chickens. He will then make at least one egg-celent joke every. single. time. you join him in the coop.

This is about Mars so I haven't brought up Jupiter but just know you need to be besties with Jupes to be with Mars.

He is a good cook and will happily cook for you, but if you cook for him he's yours forever. That's only a minor exaggeration.

Loves playing board games with you. Quiet date nights in are usually trying out new board games he found.

The most annoying bitch ever and will put obscenely hard logic puzzles in front of you asking you to solve them. He will literally just walk over to you and place a five-page logic question that gives you flashbacks to math class. This will happen all while he has the biggest most shit-eating grin plastered on his face.

He doesn't actually do it to tease or make fun of you, at least it's not the main reason. He honestly just like using it as an excuse to show off in front of you. He loves being praised by you. Don't let it go to his head I beg.

He uses whatever soap and body wash you use. There's a chance you don't even notice because he buys replacements. There's no deeper reason other than it's right there. If you two don't live together and he's staying at his own house he uses his brother's stuff.

If you're into it, one of your first (and later regular) dates would be to the jazz lounge he frequents.

He doesn't care that much about what he wears but he'd happily put on a fashion show for you.

If y'all are close you can joke about his trauma, Mars even encourages it

#anon my dear im sorry this is so short #Mars is my boy but im not sure how to characterize him yk #I reread sourapple's comic and now i can't figure out a way to make him not an asshole #if you have any notes or suggestions lmk #sans x reader #sans x you #undertale scenarios #undertale x reader #sans #horrortale #horrortale sans x reader #ht sans x reader #horrortale sans #request #ht!sans

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raayllum · 1 year

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you don’t have to answer this if its too discoursey but i’m too afraid to say it off anon cause I don’t wanna get yelled at, but I am not the biggest fan of emperor/king Callum fics, mainly since it feels out of character for me (since he feels more connected to magic than he does royalty as a whole, he’s only the crown prince because he & Ez don’t have any family left to take up that role)

and also because to me, as a black person, it feels really weird that it just sidelines Ezran, they always just kill him off for no reason except to put the white person in a position of power

Its okay as a concept, i suppose, say Ezran feels like he can’t bear the responsibility at his age, so Callum takes up the mantle, but it just feels Weird to me, and maybe I’m reaching but it does feel like there’s a hint of racism going on even if its not exactly the author’s intention

So back in like 2020 in the months following S3, Regent Amaya became a popular headcanon in the Janaya corner of the fandom (because they wanted to have to interact Politically with Janai rather than just personally? I don't know) and it never sat right with me for similar reasons. (Cue people complaining in S4 that Janay's plotline was more Janai centric than Amaya centric. Mmhm.)

Because here's the thing (and I've said this before) while Callum is not white (he is mixed, he's half Asian and half white) he is lighter skinned than his brother and I do understand why people think he's white at first glance (more discussion/perspectives on Callum's race in this tag) and Ezran very clearly is not, and it's also very clear how that can affect them sometimes fandom wise. Of the five like main Main characters (although that list is 100% expanding in S4), Ezran is one of two main characters of colour (bonus core protagonist points alongside his brother) and he is the only darker skinned character of colour, comparatively in the trio.

There are other reasons I think as well about why Ezran doesn't have as much fandom made about him (he's the youngest in the cast, most of the fandom is older; he's not part of a main ship, etc) but race absolutely affects a lot of the critique he (and Harrow) get as kings. I have seen people with their full chest go "I hate TDP's monarchy, they're such bad kings Viren was right" because their issue isn't at its core the monarchy, it's that their white fave's bloodline wasn't the one on the throne for once.

Also talking about race is never discoursey IMO so always feel free to drop stuff in my inbox about it. (I'll happily take getting yelled at for it, it's way easier to bear as a white person & it doesn't happen as often as a result.)

Since 2016, we've seen this mini trend of casts having one Black character, usually a boy who's a best friend of the protagonist, get routinely sidelined. Lucas had to carry Stranger Things on his back (although I think it's gotten better? Idk for sure I stopped watching the show after s2 for unrelated reasons), Finn from Star Wars deserved so much better (and I left the SW fandom bc the racism was so bad and he was my favourite after just six months), Bow from She-Ra got virtually nothing, and Gus from The Owl House actually did.

TDP, thankfully, does not fall into that trend (having more than like 1-2 Black characters in general also helps a great deal, JC) and I now no longer watch every season like a hawk to ensure that it won't, because I trust that it won't.

So. King Callum AUs. The first thing is that you're right, Callum isn't that interested in politics. While he has a mind for politics (he immediately realizes what the egg could mean globally) he's not motivated by them. In 1x06 he gets pissed & fed up because Rayla insists on giving him only the political reasonings for why she's travelling with them and not stealing the egg, and it's not enough (he wants the personal reasons). His Tales of Xadia bio reaffirms this, stating outright that he's "beholden to [his] inner circle, not some silly kingdom" in spite of being Crown Prince. I think in some ways if Callum was left alone as King, regent Amaya would be more likely, not less, even if Callum might resist out of a grief fuelled desperate "I have to do this" at first. Being King is genuinely liberating for Ezran in ways it'll just never be for his brother, thematically / personality wise

And Callum being king because Ezran died is, IMO, unnecessary and actually more restrictive for both of their characters. If you want Callum grieving but away from the throne off adventuring with Rayla in an angsty AU, you can just have him think Ez is dead and achieve the same aims. If you want Callum on the throne, you can just have him do it out of love/loyalty for his baby brother. Otherwise, Ezran actually being dead leaves Callum solely grieving and stranded away from magic (his true calling, or the temptation of dark magic). But if Callum becomes regent to try and shield his baby brother, it leaves a lot more for them to grow, disagree on and develop, etc. Just a lot more avenues. How I think this would go (honouring Ezran's role to play and how I think their dynamic would realistically develop with this addition) here.

Being aware of what does or doesn't displace a character can be tricky, but I always think of it in regards to "do you take something another character has earned and give it to another character with little consequence," killing a character off when it wouldn't change that much to keep them alive and just tweak other things (like the above), or "are you taking the challenge one character has set before them and giving it unequivocally to another".

For example I've thought about "is my theory of Callum sacrificing/handing over the Key of Aaravos for Rayla's life displacing him" but it's not, in my eyes, bc 1) all the repercussions that come from that action is still something he has to deal with, 2) he'd have a vested interest and arc in reclaiming the cube, 3) it highlights the tragedy of Callum regaining his agency from brainwashing and still being forced into Aaravos' tragedy, 4) still leaves Callum perfectly free and motivated to uncover the secrets of the key himself beforehand, it just won't end well for him. And if Callum was having big conflicts with Ezran RN, I'd probably swap in Ez as a possibility for who he'd hand the key over for too

Last but not least I do wonder if Callum will even remain his brother's High Mage. The symbolism of a brother on either side of the Border has always felt fitting to me, and I think Claudia would make a great high mage to Ez if/when she gets redeemed / she'll want to stick close to her brother. Now that Callum has Ibis' staff, I wonder if that'll also eventually include having Ibis' post, especially now that Soren has stepped up in S4 to really be Ez's protector (and Cal and Ez would still write letters all the time, of course <3 Ez checking in on him through his link with Zym).

But yeah I think if Callum did continue to be in a political role beyond high mage, he'd be best suited to be one of Ezran's top generals, and that would take its own interesting toll on Ezran's psyche

Anyway this is probs longer than you were expecting but thank you for sharing your perspective! It's something I think the bulk of the fandom has noticed and it's always good to look at areas of like, perhaps more casual than outright racism when it comes to characters of colour, and how we have a responsiblity to examine those areas when exploring things, even just in fanon

#in regards to #bc that's my tag for race things #thanks for asking #anonymous #ezran #tdp broyals #broyals #AU #canon divergence #tdp

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space-blue · 2 years

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hi! so, since you write some arcane meta, i was wondering: why didn't sevika betray silco? we've seen that she's been willing to switch sides before (when she betrayed vander), why didn't she with silco? she betrayed vander because he refused to stand up to the enforcers because he cared too much about his kids. when sevika had the opportunity to betray silco, he was acting similarly to vander (refusing to give up jinx, even if it meant not gaining independence), so why didn't she go along with finn?

Hello Anon! Yes, I love interesting meta asks. This is a neat one too actually. Casual warning that this is all my opinion, not necessarily the strict canon, even if I can sound like I'm preaching gospel.

Let me answer the very end question to clarify things up.

I don't think Silco, in the end, is doing what Vander ever did. Not as far as Sevika knows or is concerned. She never gets to know Silco got an offer of peace from Jayce, or that he thinks of refusing for Jinx's sake. He gets abducted before that. At no point does Sevika see Silco give up anything for Jinx, or not take action because of Jinx, the way Vander did.

Quite the contrary: Sevika is tasked by Silco to hunt down and kill Vi when she returns to the Lanes, as we see Sevika come back to the office to report failure. Eventually when Vi is found, Silco goes to see her killed in person. He's proactive and not shy of killing Vander's kids. No other kids are in the equation.

Sevika may hate Jinx, but Jinx works for their cause, no matter how she may dislike it. She's building the bomb, she does take care of the blockade (again, even if Sevika disapproves of her killing Marcus). No one is refusing to hit on Piltover because of anyone else.

Why is Sevika so loyal?

Silco, unlike Vander, is acting out a masterplan. It's also a very different plan from his act I idea of handing out monsterification vials to Zaunites to raid Piltover. We can very easily assume that Sevika, his closest lieutenant and occasional advisor, would know the details of this new plan inside out. Heck, it seems even the Chembarons know what the deal is.

Meanwhile, Vander's goal was to not make any waves and to suppress uprisings from his own people. Sevika, under Vander, was impotent. He was getting in the way of vengeance, and in the way of progress for the cause of Zaun. The fact he did it for his children is irrelevant. He was an unbreakable status quo.

Going to Silco, she finds herself working for someone who has ideas, drive, a ruthless streak she clearly shares. Someone who'll break many eggs for the omelette he feels they've long deserved. Even if it ends up taking years to get there, act II takes great pains to show us how much richer and united Zaun is.

Sevika has clearly been kept busy. She may have serious beef with Jinx, and with Silco's reliance on Jinx, but again, Silco isn't protecting her. He's putting Jinx to work for the cause, even if she shows no signs of caring about it. She isn't being coddled and Silco isn't stalling because of her (though it's an idea I've seen in fanon, in canon we simply don't know what his win conditions are and why he's still faffing about playing the industrialist. We see him bemoan how the hexgates make Piltover leave Zaun "further behind", hinting at the idea he's struggling to catch up to some goal).

So the situation is simply different from Vander.

But then there's also the fact that Sevika clearly knows where she shines. She's a great follower. That's not an insult or a fault. Not everyone is suited for the top dog position. I think Sevika reached the place where she can utilise her skills best, and doesn't have to carry the burden of leadership—and she knows it. Funnily enough she gets on Silco's ass after he gives her a little too much to do lol

Seriously though, regarding Finn. Why didn't she go with him?

Not too hard, I should think : because he's a self-serving idiot without any sense of vision.

He doesn't understand Sevika's loyalty. He appeals to her ego, to her "want" for more, something I think he's 100% projecting and not realising Sevika just… doesn't want more. Finn never mentions the cause. He never talks of Zaun, just of petty power plays.

I think Finn completely misses the fact Sevika is a true believer.

She betrayed Vander when it he wouldn't stand up against Piltover, and then proceeds to be loyal to a fault to the one man whose entire reason for breathing is to create the Free Nation of Zaun. I think Sevika is way more devoted to that cause than she's often made out to be.

And Finn is all bling, all wealth and power and no politics, no brains and no future.

She uses him to remind Silco to stop fucking around (and maybe negotiate a raise lol), but it's clear she's never considered Finn seriously. Worse, she manipulated Finn by making him confident she was on his side. He shows up with his one supporter, and Sevika turns this into a way of cleaning up house. It's a master stroke of multi tasking. Finn was right. She is a scary lady.

I conclusion, I don't think Vander's motivations for doing what he did matter to Sevika at all. I believe she sticks to Silco because she's a true believer who has been doing a lot of satisfying work under him. We have to not forget that act II and III are a glimpse over 3 days of pure crisis, at the end of 5 to 10 years of work where they clearly got along enough to still be working together. And finally, Silco coming so close to getting what he wants is no known, and only Jinx, Vi, and Cait know about Silco wanting to drop the offer for Jinx's sake. Not a thing he even has a chance to do.

Hope that answers it x'D

#Sevika #Arcane #Silco #Vander #Meta #Jinx #arcane meta #anon ask #thanks for the ask!#sevika arcane

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bluegekk0 · 1 year

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adding on to what the earlier anon was saying, I love how buff he looks. it would be perfectly understandable if he snapped the Rock in half, lit a blunt with his breath, and then called pk babygirl in that order. this man honestly looks like emasculating Jason Momoa is his hobby. I lob him <3

bahahaha yes that sounds like an average friday for him. snap a few spines, bite a few necks and then kiss the shrimb bf. although i will say, one of my favourite things about him is that, while he can be terrifying and very intimidating, he's also surprisingly soft and gentle with pk and his family. he can go from the scariest god in the entire pantheon to a loving and caring partner in the blink of an eye. it's really wholesome but it also means that you really don't want to get on his bad side haha

also, i feel like it's fitting to bring it up here, but i also personally really like the contrast between his very stereotypically masculine build and the fact that he was the one carrying the egg from which lewk hatched. especially since, out of the two, i imagine most people would assume that pk was the one who took the role of the mother, so i like that this is sort of a neat little twist you wouldn't expect. makes their dynamic a lot more interesting in my opinion, especially with the role reversal that came with the whole egg deal. pk having to be the one taking care of his big beefy vampire boyfriend who could easily snap your back in half if he wasn't carrying an egg at this moment? love that shit. love me a good role reversal

but yeah. i love him very much, and i'm glad others do as well <3

#ask stuff #feral pk au

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marvelfilth · 9 months

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So, I just wanted to let you know what's happening just in case you're hit with any asks regarding it:

Back when I thought me, you, and Egg were just joking around with the tumblr wife thing (at least that's what I meant it as) I upset Egg.

I apologized to her, but apparently my actions upset some other people too cause anons and blogs have chimed in on Eggs page to get upset with me and I don't want Egg to have to deal with that nor you since my emoji is used over here too.

Apparently, saying I'll leave the inbox to stop the drama made even more people upset. I don't understand, but ok.

So I apologize if because of this your inbox gets loaded with things.

-🪓

I also thought we were just joking around, and I'm pretty sure the anons were blaming me too, I've apologized and thought we moved on, but apparently not?

I think her anons just want drama, cause egg is okay with it

Don't apologise, it's all fine!

Hope you're not planning on leaving my inbox anytime soon

#ask #🪓anon

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blazehedgehog · 2 years

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Why do you think so many left-leaning people are fans of the modern Persona games? Most regressive otaku-bait Japanese media gets the stink eye by a lot of progressive people but Persona 4/5 are usually given a pass, even celebrated, despite having a lot of nasty homophobia , casual sexism, and sexualizing underage characters.

I follow Bobby Schroeder and she did a series of posts not too long ago that are making me see red flags all over what you're asking here.

Against my better judgement, I'm going to answer you anyway. Don't make me regret it, or it'll be the last one you ever get.

I also want to answer it simply because, like... it's worth saying: who cares? I know good people who still like Persona and they have their reasons. I don't have to interrogate them on that answer. They can just like a thing, even if I don't.

They've already passed my comfort test. Within reason, I know they aren't a monster. (Unlike you, an Anon, who I've never met; my first impression with you has to be the thing you are broadcasting out in to the world, which happens to be this message right here)

Plus, it's like, when somebody still likes Persona in spite of all the bad it contains? I think I can understand it. I personally don't want to play Persona games because they are very long and because of a few bad eggs on staff... but at least those moments of homophobia and sexism and whatever are usually kind of marginal to the overall story.

Like my primary context is Persona 4, where Kanji and Naoto are in a group of seven main characters. Naoto doesn't come in until over halfway through the story, too. In games that are routinely 100+ hours long, those elements are comparatively tiny.

(Unlike Catherine, where "eww, transgender" ends up being one of the central plot points. But that's Catherine, not Persona.)

For some people, the fact those elements exist at all are a deal breaker, but for others, it isn't. It probably occupies the same space as anime having the "horny grandpa" trope. You just kind of pretend it isn't there and try to see around it. An occupational hazard, of sorts.

And you also have to remember the evidence that at least some people on the Persona 4 staff were trying to push for more LGBT representation. There's cut content to suggest the main character could have had something of a male romance, but it ended up getting cut.

Anyway, everybody has different tolerances for that kind of content. And just because they tolerate it doesn't mean they like it or agree with it.

We are all unique individuals. Coming at this from "WHY IS THE LEFT SO CONTRARIAN TO THEIR BELIEFS?" is a bad angle and comes off like you're trying to pick a fight.

I suggest you don't pick fights. Don't start none, won't be none.

#questions #Anonymous #persona #atlus

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vohalika · 5 years

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hello, this is random but.. could u please tell me some of your fav things about vex? i don't often see people who Really Like Vex and we need more of that

Well, well, well, anon.

I have literally no idea how long it has been since you asked this of me, but rest assured I have not forgotten! Well, okay, I had for a while, then I saw it again and was like “oh, right, huh… And would you look at that, I’m about 100 posts away from 100,000… Wouldn’t that be a good one…”

So. Here we are! An unstructured rambling of all the reasons I really, really love Vex, somewhere between superficial and embarrasingly personal, to celebrate this arbitrary number of things I have spread around on this hell site.

Okay, first of all, the only thing Laura had to say to Kit Buss for the official art was “make her hot”. That is a Statement. And boy did Kit and also everyone deliver on that.

Like seriously. I didn’t use to be a fan of feathers in hair or white armor, but good god does she make it work.

Hey, I said this was going to be extremely superficial

Another thing I really didn’t use to like, twins. Overdone and usually poorly executed. But our girl made a Point out of being as different from her twin as she could be while at the same time being completely believable siblings.

I swear to god I’ll do my absolute best to mention Vax as little as possible. This is not about him.

Third thing I really couldn’t stand! The one, usually female, team member with a pet! Closely related to the one with the nature powers! I don’t know, these just always rubbed me the wrong way in media before, probably because I also never really cared for shows or movies about animals. Fight me.

And yet here she is, and she is not the “won’t somebody think of the children animals!” type of gal and Trinket is amazing and it still ties into her personality on a larger scale without being preachy.

I have a fourth thing. I also really don’t care for elves, ever. Everybody hates them. And then she turns around and makes me cry about the elf thing. Good god.

Yes, watching the first episode way back when was an uphill battle. There’s a reason I started with episode 69 and then watched the rest.

Nice.

Vex has the best worst sense of humor. No, really. I’m not even talking about that time she made a comment about the boy with the shot off fingers not having much of a future as a musician. But I’m also talking about that. And that time Scanlan tried having a meaningful monologue about having a daughter now. “I’ve defined most of my life by the people I slept with, and now…” - “Well, technically, this is still kinda defined by that.”

(Shoutout to Percy “I was just thinking that”)

Also, “We don’t do anything with dignity”, “I only serve gods with big dicks”, “You might live forever, but you will still be fucking ugly”? Girl is iconic, even if her sense if humor is usually pretty inappropriate for the given situation, she just can’t help it. I relate.

On a related note, it is so easy to play a similar archetype and have her just be this always dignified and above the humor kind of stuck-up. It’s basically how most people would have written her (and a certain someone did). But not our girl, oh no.

Also, I recently made a post about this, but we really, really don’t talk enough about how she’s just the leader of the party. She is. No, really, lower your bitch sticks, y’all. She’s the one to talk to the most NPCs, she’s the one to usually say go, and everyone just naturally adheres to her. It’s never forced, it’s never an “I, as the leader” moment, and she doesn’t try to wrestle her way into the role. It’s just what happens naturally.

Which also means she’s good at stepping back and letting other people shine for a bit. But still, Vex is the reason they didn’t just flounder around like a chicken without its head after Scanlan left. Laura was late to two sessions in campaign one; the first one was already in an extended battle scene, and the other was literally spent in a bedroom in hell waitinig for Vex to tell them what to do.

This is why scholars are generally of the opinion that Vex is the only Top in VM. And also what intellectuals refer to as Big Dick Energy.

Let’s talk about what the assholes call Greed. Yes, Vex is, out of all of them, the most pre-occupied with gold and loot. But she NEVER hoards anything for herself, never spends any of her own gold on herself even until the timeskip, leave alone the party funds.

She looks out for the interests of the group, makes sure they get the best possible deals and are paid what they are owed. And she’s the only one to ever worry about money, too, whereas everyone else never bothers to think about it. Hence why her and Vax split the cost of paying their staff after the party spent all the funds early on.

Look, I find her worries very indicative of growing up in poverty with her mom, than surrounded by rich and important people but locked out of the loop, and then poor and on the road again with Vax. I find it very relatable, and everyone who claims that looking out for the financial well-being of the party is “greedy” is lucky enough to never have had to worry about eating next month while also making rent.

There’s Safety In A Fist Full Of Diamonds, okay?

No really I need y’all to read that and send it to the annoying bitches who complain.

Vex is literally never stingy when it comes to helping people with the money she made sure they have. Remember how she didn’t even flinch at spending a five digit number to free angel boy slaves?

WHICH LEADS ME TO ANOTHER POINT. Vex. Vex has a serious hoarding problem. But not when it comes to money of earthly possessions. No. When it comes to PICKING UP STRAYS.

It’s how she got Trinket.

It’s how she got the angel babies.

It’s what she tries to do with the grey render baby.

It’s what she suggested they do with the dragon eggs in the Raishan fight

(LET! VEX! HAVE! PET! DRAGONS!)

IT HOW SHE GOT HER OWN GODDAMN HUSBAND OKAY.

I have no idea how she hasn’t adopted her own zoo by the time VM forms. Though I can totally see her opening orphanages in Whitestone, both for people and animals and creatures of all kinds, really.

Remember when she was the only one to protest the punching of a spectral ghost cow?

The hardships of her youth made her, yes, very afraid of being out of money, but also made her compassionate as fuck. She’s always down with helping people even if there’s little to no coin in it, okay? Stop overlooking that, assholes.

SPEAKING OF COMPASSION. Remember what her original beef with the Vasselheim potion seller was? That he took advantage of Grog being intellectually challenged. Which is what he did! Blatantly so! And he wasn’t the least bit sorry about it!

I mean, I bet he is by now, but, you know. Karma.

When Laura says Vex just wanted justice and then everyone else escalated that scene she is goddamn right, rewatch your own footage Matthew.

Oh god do I have to talk about broomgate now. I don’t want to talk about broomgate.

OKAY

Broomgate is literally the only time in the entire series that Vex ever takes something for herself. Was it the morally right thing to do? Maybe not. Though to keep in mind that a) Hardwick is a piece of shit, b) they literally met Gern when he had the skeletons of Kiki’s dead civilization dancing for him; Vax shanked Nothics for less, c) and this was hot off the heels of fighting a necromancer in the last big arc, too, d) they were on a mission to kill dragons. That fly. With no method of flying for the majority of the party. Vex always intended to use the broom for that purpose, so you could make the legal argument of commandeering it instead of stealing, and, finally, e) SHE HAD JUST FUCKING DIED

Why do we never talk about that

Other characters get cut all the slack for what they do after just dying

Other characters get cut all the slack when they steal from other guests

Other characters get cut all the slack when they withhold loot for the party

Other characters DIDN’T GET AN ALIGNMENT DROP FOR DOING WORSE SHIT THAN THIS

WHY ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT BROOMGATE

WHY WAS BROOMGATE EVER EVEN A THING

okay

MOVING ON

Hey, while we’re at dying. Remember how Vex spent the day after she, literally, died, trying to make sure the person who was to blame for her death was okay? She did that. And Percy was uncomfortable with it, visibly so, but also too guilty to call her out here.

And no one. NO ONE. EVER. Bothered to check in on how she felt after dying.

Vax made it all about the sacrifice he made, Percy felt too guilty, NO ONE ELSE CARED.

And what does she do? Soldier on. Try and cheer Vax up and support him in any way she can.

Honestly, learning the Raven Queen book by heart and then telling him that being the champion of a god is really fucking cool? Relatable. Relatable as fuck. You go girl.

And TO THIS DAY. ACROSS TWO CAMPAIGNS. Vex has been the only one. THE ONLY ONE. To EVER check up on someone after they died. Jester might eventually be the second one, but, you know. I am a big advocate for post-death and just post-big-battle-in-general aftercare cuddle piles or whatever. Someone tell the cast to implement that immediately.

And while we’re at death, let’s talk about THE DARKNESS

There are dark facets to her character. Vex never makes her own issues everyone else’s problem and they go largely unadressed, but they’re there.

Saundor brought up the story about how she got Trinket and had to kill for the first time while doing so.

(Sidenote: Saundor doing more research into her character than an actual writer is extremely telling.)

That was definitely traumatic for a young girl and I don’t mean to dismiss that, but that’s also the part I can understand Vax dismissing when they talk about it later on. They do kill a lot of people after that and this was self-defense, so hey, okay. Fine.

HOWEVER

That short story was indicative of many other things that torment Vex. Mostly her low sense of self-worth.

Like, her entire inner monologue is centered around how stupid she was for getting into this situation in the first place (= for being taken advantage of by criminals at the tender age of probably like 15), and how this would never have happened to Vax, who was away in the city to take care of them.

And we see that low sense of self-worth bleeding into Vex’s character throughout the campaign. That’s part of the reason why she spends the day after her first death making sure everyone else is okay. That’s also part of the reason she blames herself for Scanlan leaving and acts like she’s completely fine when he returns just so he’ll stay.

Honestly that short story is so insightful and explains so much about her, I don’t know how anyone could claim to have any grasp on her character without reading it.

(Also, Laura should write more, she’s talented)

Now a significant part of her self-worth issues obviously also ties back into her time at Syngorn. I can just hear people getting out their tiny violins, oh, waaah, she wasn’t one of the rich, cool kids in elf school, poor her.

But that’s not entirely it?

Like, just that is already plenty to fuck a person up. I’ve been there, too.

But let’s just say the fact that her dad was also cold towards them and acted like they were unworthy is a BIG part of what fucked her up. Call it daddy issues if you feel like being dismissive about a genuinely traumatizing upbringing, but that’s how it is.

And don’t get me wrong, if this were the traumatic childhood olympics, it’s not exactly up there and relatively tame for the background of a character in a fantasy story, but it is very true to life and extremely relatable, and Laura just executes it so well. So, so well.

That’s part of what makes the entire stretch of Feywild episodes so great. From what we see of Vax’s reaction later on, Percy is the only person she ever talked to about this - or at least the only one who ever listened - and he immediately got it. And instead of yelling at her about how amazing she is, he did something to make her feel better about herself. Without making it about himself, by the way.

I enjoy a fake married plotline as much as the next gal, but Percy giving her a title she’d have to earn by her own merits is soooo much more meaningful than just putting a fake ring on her, okay?

Yes, at the end of the day, this is basically a Cinderella fantasy. So what? No, really. One of the best things about Vex and her arc is that it validates feeling upset about not measuring up in superficial, material ways. And it validates getting your come-uppance. These are, as mentioned above, experiences that can really mess with a person, but we’re usually supposed to be above it all because money and titles don’t make you happy.

Also something only people who never struggled financially can say/believe unironically and without specifying.

Hell, that’s about 70% of the reason I’m considering getting a Ph.D. if I happen to get the grades.

I’m also not a big fan of the term daddy issues, but I can’t deny that this is a thing here

not the thing they went into the Feywild for, buuuut

ahem

So. Remember when Laura said during the campaign wrap up that Vex thought of Scanlan as a father figure and everyone was like whaaaaat? And I was like ahahahaha, I knew it.

This is so tragic, really. Because she tried so hard so many times to help Scanlan and be nice to him and he just brushed her off. And then she’s the one who volunteers to spend the night all by herself in some dirty pub far, far away after opening up to his daughter about her own issues to bring him back alive, and then gets yelled at, and never apologized to.

And then he comes back and tries to erase her memory and not only is that never even brought up, she also just doesn’t even think she might be owed an apology because a) she still blames herself for him leaving because, you know, they never really talked out what happened there and b) she’s just too happy for at least that father figure returning to them to make much of a fuss about it, and Percy, bless his heart, TRIES, but it’ll take a few more years of marriage to talk through all of her issues

And like. I am not wild about anything that happens after episode 99. If I’m known for anything in this fandom on this platform it’s probably for that time I was really into the Ioun discourse, which I still stand by, btw. And I personally would have preferred for Vex to maybe get someone like Sehanine as her patron, as fitting as giving her yet another unworthy and disapproving father figure in her life might be

But there is also something somewhat gratifying about everyone talking about how great she is. And she had been sort of working for Pelor before that. Also, the headcanons about her having sun spots or starting to glow when she gets emotional after this are amazing.

So I made my peace with that. She deserves better, but hey, she always does.

She is so smart. So extremely smart. People roll their eyes at her battle plans and say it’s all Travis feeding Laura information, but Travis fed her nothing that time she schmoozed up to the Briarwoods while also making herself appear extremely superficial and unthreatening. Honestly. That dinner scene? Prime Vex. Amazing Vex.

Her battle plans are also so good. Pokeball-ing Grog out of the kill box? Using the Goristro against Vorugal to save the party a trip into the abyss? The only plan of Vox Machina that ever worked out basically perfectly? Amazing. And even IF Travis told Laura these ideas, that means literally nothing in relation to how smart Vex is.

And btw I don’t believe that for a second. People just aren’t good with acknowledging that sometimes, D&D playing women might actually have good ideas.

And she just is so street smart. With her skills, her battle plans, and just her way of handling people. There’s a reason she is the natural leader when it’s not someone’s turn in the spotlight at the time.

Like, the two things holding her back were that her class was extremely underwhelming, so much so that it got completely revamped in the Unearthed Arcana to make up for how bad it was in the PHB, and the fact that she just. Has, what. 1.5 episodes of her own storyline? Even Pike got 2. It’s amazing that I can even say this much about her with how little narrative focus she got throughout the series. And most of what she did was literally due to Percy using his plot clout and putting a foot in the door to force her into the spotlight.

Speaking of which. Percy’s best quality, next to being self-aware of how fucked up he is and actively trying to do better and be kept in check, is how he realizes Vex is the coolest, smartest, most amazing person around and treats her accordingly. The way she deserves to be treated.

Oh hey I mentioned to get this far without even mentioning the romance arc. And oh my god THE ROMANCE ARC. The pining. The slow burn. And the fact that we actually saw them together and later married for like 35 episodes. They were so good for each other.

And yes, PERCY WAS GOOD FOR HER. And Vex was not his therapist and manic pixie dream girl. None of that bullshit here. Percy was already firmly on the path to being better before he even considered that crush he has had on her for forever to turn into something more.

And by he was good for her I mean that he actually UNDERSTOOD her and where she was coming from. Refer again to the titling issue, where Vax is just confused and kind of pissed, Percy got it. And that’s important.

Something I have not made a post about so far, by the way, is also something people have called problematic and co-dependant is how Percy shares his darker impulses with Vex in hopes she’ll talk him out of it. Which she does, and it’s never hard, but that also means so much to her? Because he involves her and tells her exactly what is going on with him and values her opinion? And that is just exactly what she needs? And they’re so good? THEY’RE SO GOOD.

WHEN DOES YOUR OTP EVER

HE COULDN’T HAVE ASKED FOR A BETTER DREAM

This is more on Laura, admittedly, but also, it was just so great to see her unapologetically pursuing this romance? There’s a place at the table for a 72 episode slow burn, and she’s gonna go for it, and there’s nothing any of the dudebros who are just here for the fighting can do about it.

And also Vex is just so unapologetically sexual at the same time. From episode 1 onwards, really, and in general and just limited to Percy. And no one ever treats that as weird or bad or anything. It’s just who she is and that’s great.

And she fought. So hard. For that happy ending of hers. Kicking and screaming, against the world and against Taliesin’s determination that Percy is irredeemable and not capable of getting a happy ending. Defy that auctorial intent, my girl. You deserve it.

Seriously. Seeing her get that happy ending against all odds was unfathomably gratifying and validating and I’ve never connected to any single character or narrative at large for that matter this much and this intimately, and considering how I came across this story at one of the darkest times in my life, I probably never will feel so strongly connected to anything ever again.

Which is probably for the best, but hey.

Aaaand there you go. An almost unstructured, epically long list of reasons I love Vex. Dammit, I talked about other characters way more than I intended, buuuut hey. That’s how it goes when you’ve got an ensemble piece, they’re all kinda interwoven.

Thank you this wonderful ask, anon, and reason to celebrate my 100,000th post on this site in style.

#critical role #cr #cr1 #vex'ahlia #lady vex'ahlia de rolo #is better than you #deserved better from the narrative #will forever be my favorite character probably #will forever be part of my ultimate OTP #we do not deserve her #we are unworthy #long post #long post for ts

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linkspooky · 7 years

Note

Hello, look I don't want to seem rude or offensive to your posts here, but in one of your last posts you say "Amon has not done anything relevant in :re" or something like that and personally I don't agree with that. If that were a few chapters ago I could still agree with you because even in Rushima Amon was still dealing just with personal matters chasing Seidou and Kurona, but don't now.(continues on another message, cursed be the letters limit, you can recognize me as Mr. Potato)

Mr. Potato here. As I was saying, Amon was relevant in encouraging CCG to work with the ghouls, as we saw in the chapters the investigators were surprised to see that one of the CCG heroes, Amon Koutarou, was alive, "hero" so Amon has credibility in the CCG and would get the attention of everyone because of it. I'm not here defending that he didn't lie to himself there when he said those things, but he was relevant there and this time it's not just about personal matters like Rushima.

Alright Anon, let’s define a character in the simplest of terms. A character is somebody who has a simple and clearly defined goal, and takes proactive steps towards that goal.

In Tokyo Ghoul, Amon’s goal was figuring out centipede. Almost every action he took was centered around that task, and the information he received relevant. As he was an investigator, it made sense that the main majority of his character arc is simply following Centipede’s trail and meeting him in different locations trying to figure out.

In Re: however, you cannot name one single goal which Amon pursues throughout the entire manga. His first goal is that he will pursue Seidou and Kurona and then save them because they are as he remembered in his final fight before becoming a ghoul members of his precious last sanctuary.

That is a goal, and then as we see all of Amon’s appearences in Re: before this point are trying to pursue that. Re: looking for Kurona, traveling to Rueshima in order to help Seidou.

Then, he gets exactly that. Seidou and Kurona are both safe, and even moreso they showed up to help him and drag him back to. All three of them are reunited, and Amon finally gets the chance to do as he said with Seidou, to allow Seidou to come with him and fight side by side and then....

Amon never mentions Seidou or Kurona ever again. Apparently, after dedicating three years of your life to saving someone, you don’t even want to check up on them or wonder where they are. Amon’s top priority instead becomes Akira.

Alright, his number one goal in life is Akira. He’s going to protect her and stay by her side and choose her over the world now, instead of how he failed to before in the three years he left her alone and didn’t choose to tell her he was alive. That’s his new goal- and now-

They’re both going up against Godzilla. Then we see Amon, who said that he felt all of his feelings as an investigator in the past were wrong, once again returning to his image of an idealized investigator and a CCG.

So when I say Amon has done nothing what I mean is none of his actions form together in a coherent and consistent arc. This is not a flaw of the writing (at least I hope it’s not, rule of thumb is assume everything is intentional), but rather a flaw of Amon himself and his inability to self actualize. Amon almost mirrors Kaneki in this regard, having lost his original cause he just shifts again from cause to cause as they are presented to him. Therefore he lacks the ability to truly commit himself to any one of them.

You can tell Amon’s hesitance to commit, because he almost never acts until the house is already on fire. He is reactive, rather than active. Amon waits until Rueshima is at its absolute worst and most tense, and then saves Seidou by tearing his arm off and then starting a fight with him. He does not even get to Kurona on time despite stalking her for years it seemed. Seidou is the one who waits by Akira’s bedside, and then retrieves the RC suppressant with Kaneki, and also brings Amon back, but it’s Amon who at the end of that speaks with her. Only after being told by Touka to do so, and also he realizes he wanted to speak with her all along after being told by Touka again. He does not move to help Kaneki with Goat until after 90% of the ghoul population has been exterminated, Goat is mostly destroyed, and Kaneki has turned into a giant monster. Then, and only then does Amon suddenly decide to act. The consistent thread in all of this is Amon is not an active decider in these scenarios. The scenarios area always set for him by other people, and Amon merely reacts to them, most often in the way dictated by others.

A weird writing quirk of Amon’s in Re: is that all of his importance from Tokyo Ghoul still remains, as you said Amon is an important person to the CCG, and an important perosn thematically, but we see in manifest in Re: in the form of lost potential.

Amon had the potential to understand ghouls, however he instead tried to learn everything by himself and failed to empathize with them or even see himself as a ghoul despite living as one for three years.

Amon has the potential to undermine V’s grip on the CCG, and their propaganda. He himself is a ghoul while remianing an investigator at heart and a believer in the CCG’s ideals. He is sitting on the sphinx conspiracy, the fact that the CCG experimented on him behind closed doors, etc. etc.

Yet when he chooses to speak to give the CCG a reason to fight with ghouls, does he reveal either of these things? The fact that the CCG was corrupt and that their propaganda that ghouls have no emotions was a lie? The fact that he a former CCG officer is himself a ghoul and standing right in front of them?

No, he once again justice bla bla bla peace bla bla...

Which as I remind you sounds more like V, than anything else.

Which is where I reach my point... probably. That Amon’s actions are inconsitent as a part of his character arc. He does not know what he wants to do, but he also refuses to admit that he does not know. As it would mean accepting a personal responsibility that he is not prepared to accept. Which is why he is still spouting the line of Kaneki not being a murderer, long after Kaneki became a murderer several times over.

The irony behind that line was that Kaneki is only not a murderer if he does not kill humans. As long as Amon has only killed ghouls, he is not a murderer, he is not fallen like Seidou, or Donato. Donato is Amon’s Black Goat’s Egg. Amon does not want to admit that in a way he’s repeated the same violence that he saw in Donato as a child.

To acknowledge Donato’s humanity, and to acknowledge his own actions means that he has already been a murderer long ago. Long before he became a ghoul in fact. As what Amon’s primary motivator at the beginning of the manga was, was to stop the violence in the world that was primarily aimed at children, because he let so many children in his own orphanage die. Yet his first actions is to enable and even encourage Mado’s pursuit of a child in Hinami, and kill her mother right in front of her. Then much later in the manga, Amon’s current goal is to save Kaneki Ken, somebody who did this to Hajime Hazuki.

Who remember is the same Hajime that Amon was motivated to help fix the world, protect orphans like him or prevent any more people from being orphaned all those years ago.

This is what you call an arc, these flaws and ignorances on Amon’s part are designed with a purpose. Otherwise there would be no reason to call back to Hajime all those years ago, he could have been a completely new character like Yusa, Rikai and Shio were, however the callback is deliberate and we’re meant to think on it.

Amon’s main flaw was ignorance, he even said it was the reason he was carrying the cross around his neck. In order to actually contribute in a meaningful way Amon has to figure himself out, figure out what he wants, and act proactively and consistently. That’s the path to the completion of his character arc, and so when I say that Amon has accomplished nothing, I entirely mean it as a flaw of his character. That he as a character is prevented from self actualizing due to certain flaws holding him back, and that a path exists in the narrative for resolution of this flaw.

#metasks #Anonymous

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bartsugsy · 7 years

Note

I hope the use of Seal lyrics was intentional Lo (I mean I'm pretty sure it was lol) cos "my power my pleasure my pain" distracted me from the great meta (to be?) post you were making! But back on topic I feel you on all the unresolved shiz, I just don't think the show think anywhere near as deeply into it as us! I do think more effort is put into Robron (and Coira) then other couples which translates into longer story arcs, so there's still hope.. pleasure and pain... lol!

oh, yk i just can’t resist throwing nonsensical song lyrics into things

the show definitely doesn’t think about this shit as deeply as we do because… well, they’ve got other characters to worry about and we’re all out here like HERE’S 200 WORDS OF META ON THE SIGN IN THE BACKGROUND OF A SCENE WHERE ROBERT AND AARON ARE MAKING OUT

(i say we but that was me. i did that. I DID IT AND I STAND BY IT)

sometimes i do think though that… even if yes, ok, OK FINE, none of these scenes were made to withstand the level of in-depth scrutiny we put them under and no, i never needed to write a 3000 word essay on the confusing characterisation of rebecca white when she’s clearly, in the crudest terms, more plot device than representative of an understandable human and as such it’s all just sort of futile, but… sometimes, just sometimes, i think the bigger picture ideas aren’t actually necessarily off base

ok and i just got this ask from another anon, so hopefully neither of you mind, but i’m going to put this in here, because this ties in to the point i’m going to attempt to make (that’s really just me validating my inability to be succinct and my love of meta) lmao:

anonymous asked:

but i think - because its a soap - robert and aaron are never going to resolve any of their issues in a satisfying way. because if they were resolved and dealt with then the show wouldn’t be able to use those issues for drama. so i can’t really see their reunion addressing any of the january stuff tbh

on some level, i agree with you. i totally do. on another, broader-picture level, i think that… i think i’ve been surprised by the level of cohesiveness in the storytelling for aaron and robert - like, it’s not the most tightly constucted thing in the world by any means, and this is obviously coming out of me coming from the glee fandom, where we had literally no cohesiveness ever and so i’m probably just over-impressed by even the most marginal attempts to write a meaningfully constructed longer form story, but… but i think, given that it’s a soap and given how much content they need to produce and given the inconsistent treatment of a lot of the characters on the show, aaron and robert’s relationship does get a decent amount of care put into it, on the whole, and sometimes that’s visible in the storytelling - like sometimes, a scene will happen that just sort of… slots a lot of things into place and calls back to meta we’ve been writing the whole time and… idk. like, you really do just need to look at rebecca as a character and compare the writing for her over the past year with the writing for aaron and robert, who have much more consistent traits and motivations.

i think this is why i like writing meta for this show. because sometimes there’s a pay off, where the show will specifically highlight things we’ve been talking about and examining and make them explicitly canon. it’s super satisfying. the heavy handedness works (for me) for this purpose. it’s like taking our meta and saying to everyone ‘oh hey, that thing you were reading into is exactly what we were going for’. and the general audience will do this as well - everyone will have an opinion on what’s happening beneath the surface of some stuff, it’s just that they might mention it off-hand to someone they’re watching the show with whereas we sit down and spend three hours typing up an argument to support it based entirely on how we’ve interpreted that last three years of canon and then use it to try and convince people to feel the same way lmaoooo. it’s awesome. but those bigger picture ideas that maybe aren’t called out specifically

like… don’t get me wrong, i don’t believe in the idea that they’re going to call back specifically to the january argument and take a big, in-depth delve into why that specifically happened and why it was some sort of turning point that they ignored in favour of being together and how that ultimately went wrong… i can’t imagine that’s happening lmao, that’s absolutely what our meta is for (which is fine). like… i don’t see them calling back to the specifics in any meaningful way (at most we might get some dialogue parallels bc the show loves those, as we know lmao)

but like… ok, some of this is going to come back to how early on did the show know they were going to break aaron and robert up, in all honesty. we know that iain has been intending to get rid of the whites… probably since the time he started? going by the interviews he was giving at that time? we know rebecca was brought on with some sort of plan in place for her character (to get in between robron lmao). obviously we can sort of… like, chicken or the egg, what came first - lucy announcing she was pregnant and them realising that rob and aaron would have to get married quickly, or iain deciding to go max feeling exploitation and get two weddings out of robron? this is all random extrapolation on events we know, because we can’t pinpoint when it became clear to them that they were going to do a wedding, followed by a big break up, followed by a big reunion and culminating in another, ~~~~real (so to speak)~~ wedding. but at some point, that would have been firmly in their plans.

the january argument -

ok. ok fuck it let’s meta the january argument even though i literally said i wasn’t going to and that i wanted to wait until they got back together idc i don’t listen to me she doesn’t know what’s up

the reason i love the january argument so much as a turning point within the larger overarching story they’ve been telling is because it works so well as this big flashing harbinger of doom that the boys both ignore - it’s built up specifically from problems they have been having since right before they got engaged

and look, i wanna write meta about all the arguments they have firstly from the reunion until ssw and then from in between ssw to the january argument, because i think the stuff that takes place when rebecca is in the village is very pointedly building towards what ultimately happens in january

and i think it’s clever because when you watch it for the first time, the fact that aaron is ultimately driven to violence and puts kasim in hospital and then ultimately gets arrested is what you’re left thinking about - it totally draws attention away from the things aaron and robert are saying to one another and the way that their argument(s) echo previous fights they have had around rebecca and aaron not understanding rob’s bisexuality and rob’s tendency to lie and scheme and rob’s defensiveness around his schemes and how much he has changed and is trying to change vs how much aaron needs from him and just… the ways in which they’ve been slowly falling apart.

(and ok at some point i will write my actual meta where i actually quote the dialogue instead of making vague references to it, although i usually feel like it’s a safe assumption to think that you guys know where i’m sort of pulling these ideas from when i talk about this shit - specifically, stuff i want to talk about includes the things aaron has said about rebecca and robert’s interactions with her, the moment robert talks about his scheme as something that is no longer about andy and absolutely about the money, aaron’s understanding of the robecca kiss, rob talking about how aaron can’t be happy and that he screws things up (which is horrible foreshadowing for kasim), rob yelling about aaron walking away from arguments and not recognising the change rob has made and the way that rob literally brushes his kiss with rebecca under the table, aaron literally saying that he doesn’t like the person he is around robert because of how things have played out with rebecca ec. etc.)

anyway, they just… i’ve fully written about this before, but the kasim stuff acts as a distraction both for robert and aaron - who, before aaron’s arrest, are having a tentative conversation where rob is gently pushing for them to still go to vegas to try and work things out and aaron is absolutely not convinced. after aaron gets arrested and then gets released, the next scene they have is aaron trying to give robert an easy out and robert point blank refusing - over the course of the three episodes, from aaron getting arrested to aaron giving the police a new statement, rob makes multiple references to fighting for their relationship even if aaron doesn’t think it’s a good idea - literally says that he’s not going to stop fighting for them, which is important but also sort of conveniently skims past the point that this argument didn’t occur in a vacuum and at no point have they faced up to what happened to bring them there between the two of them.

when, during the reveal, aaron says that rob was the one who pushed for this, you can sort of see where he’s coming from in a sense. i think aaron’s impending sentencing also made it harder for them to focus on what the real issue was (or rather, made it way easier to ignore, because they were too busy being terrified of losing one another) - but even then, rob decides to throw a surprise wedding because in canon we know that aaron is panicking about leaving robert and losing him completely - which is ultimately what happens, both exactly in the way aaron feared, but also not at all because rob’s motivation to cheat is, as we all know, entirely about aaron (or rather, about both rob’s feelings for aaron and rob’s horrible decision making/tendency towards lashing out impulsively when confronted with things he doesn’t know how to deal with like a normal human and fucking up his and other people’s lives in the process). aaron’s fears that rob would want someone else were unfounded but those fears also sort of led him to underestimate how much of a toll his getting sent to prison would have on robert and so, in the most perverse and unexpected way, his fears about what robert would do given rob’s behaviour up until that point, ended up being spot on.

all this is to make a point that the january argument played a massive role in robert and aaron getting married the first time round and also led them both down a road where they were distracted from what should have been the ultimate sign that things weren’t working and thus didn’t take the opportunity to fix it, rather let things get dangerously and disastrously out of control. i remember a lot of the meta around the time of the jan argument pointing out that things hadn’t been resolved and that they would be resolved at some point - i saw a lot of people talk about an immediate resolution. i think my instinct was that it would take them a little longer - maybe a month max, but that things would be worked out before the wedding. the fact that the wedding wasn’t legal was like this big red herring - it made us all believe that the only reason they’d have a second wedding would be to legalise things. but oh, oh no, no - little did we realise at that point that the whole first wedding was just another distraction (a very beautiful and romantic distraction, but a distraction nonetheless). the first wedding wasn’t a random break from the misery they’d had between that point and ssw, it was a symptom. once again, robert finding a way to push through their issues, to make it more about their love and the fact that they want to be together, and aaron following because that’s what he wanted too - neither of them wanted to deal head on with any of their shit.

uh, taking things right back to my original point of ‘how much of this will we actually see resolved when they get back together’ - i mean, it’s difficult to say? because on the one hand, it depends on what story the show wants to tell with them next and on the other, it depends whether they want to sort of just brush their issues under the carpet and pretend they never happened (worst case lmao). i think, though… i mean, i don’t know, i actually genuinely don’t want to speculate at all on what we’ll ultimately see because down that road leads madness and also an inevitability that we’ll all get it wrong, as we did before with both the jan argument and the purpose of the first wedding, for instance. i think, particularly because it is something i’m looking forward to, i also don’t want to put any expectations on it, really? i’d rather just watch it as open-mindedly as possible. which is also why i want to wait until after i watch it until i really write my meta around this break up, because then i can sort of shape my opinions about what we’ve been shown and where they’ve taken things. i don’t want to try and assume they’ll deal with x or they won’t deal with y or they’ll have them do this or whatever.

having said that!!! that doesn’t stop us from looking at what’s been done so far - the wedding, prison and the ons happened over six months ago now, so we’ve got enough distance from it to say that… look, rob and aaron had so much misery and so many problems from ssw onwards and they ended up going through a massive break up. so big-picture wise, it’s logical that all that misery was intentional. it wasn’t just fuelling the andy plot or whatever, it was there as a build up to ultimately splitting aaron and rob up and making it last a while (even if they hadn’t decided at that point to actually break them up - it’s chicken and egg, they would have known what they’d put them through up until that point and understood that this could realistically ultimately lead to a break up). the january argument wasn’t resolved because it couldn’t be, because that would be counter-productive to the eventual plan of separating them. the first wedding was rushed and not legal and the reason for it being held was literally LITERALLY bc aaron was afraid rob would cheat - because again, that wedding wasn’t going to be the one that lasted. there had to be problems there.

basically - yes we absolutely put more thought into this shit than the show does but that doesn’t necessarily mean that the thought we put into it is… wrong? or will lead to us not feeling satisfied? because the way that things have gone wrong with robron so far have led to a break up. it feels like a safe assumption that they’re not going to go through a massive break up again after they get back together at the beginning of 2018, so on some level somewhere, it seems like a safe assumption that we’re not going to have rob kissing his ex to get money, or aaron doing a miserable 6 week prison stint, or robert knocking someone up etc. basically, i guess what i’m saying is… the pain wasn’t for nothing? it was there to play a function in the story and while i doubt that aaron and rob are gonna get back together and the show is gonna be like ‘ok well their problems are fixed now so that’s nice’, they’re going to be writing with a different eventual goal to the one they’ve had this year?

this wasn’t even ur original question i just took this to an entirely different place lmao. sorry. i guess what i’m trying to say is i’m not particularly concerned about getting a final resolution on rob and aaron’s issues, but the writing for them will change as the direction of their story changes, so. the reason i’m waiting is more because i’m waiting for that direction to stop being “keep them apart” and start being “get them back on track and prove they can be together”. which is sort of… the next step? i guess? regardless of whether or not they have problems (and it’s a soap so u know they will), the story needs to shift from a break up to a big second wedding - the one that you assume will last more than a month (because they’re not stupid - they know there’s only so much you can wring out of a thing and they’re already pushing it). so… yeah. that’s what i mean when i talk about this particular storyline wrapping up.

i could just keep that last paragraph and delete the rest and you would still have your answer but im obviously not going to do that.

#answering anons #....im on my mobile so this isn’t going under a cut im so sorry #i’ll fix it later #long post #meta #god damn @ myself pls shut up for once

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