sparrowlucero · 28 days ago
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this is the iconic dinosaur horror jurassic park wishes it was
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#so there's this person on twitter who is like an infamous drama starter and got a whole forum shut down once#and they wrote this (different) book that's one of the greatest so bad it's good things i've ever read#a few great things that happen in that:#characters get in a car crash and flee on foot. later it's casually mentioned one character had both her legs amputated 'due to fractures'#the character pretending to be american by wearing maga hats that have spy gear built into them#the spy gear in question is an alarm that blares if someone lies in their vicinity#'stuff protocol ' said the queen. 'i'm getting hammered tonight'#the chapter where the prime minister is trying to watch the news so she keeps wandering into bars and tv shops and getting kicked out#the dragon that's casually described as 'about the size of 1000 elephants'#the dragon that's a 'dog dragon hybrid with a chihuahua body and a giant dragon head'#the dragon that's owner punched it in the face and only lets people approach if they 'do the iconic royal wave'#the characters being described as 'the short one' 'the guy with the beard' etc#but there being a lengthy detailed description of the characters in harry potter#'apparently a dragon had burnt essex to cinders in a matter of minutes'#anyways i found out they also wrote (a political parody of indiana jones???) for this book of kids short stories years ago#and you know. we needed to know#so it took me like 4 months to track this precious lost media down#which was very worth it because it turns out it's full of many other iconic gems like CELLAR HELL by Elizabeth Elgie (12)
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hemorrhoidbabe69 · 2 months ago
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Gridania's new arrival
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sourcherryandsprinkles · 20 days ago
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Reader being anxious about JJ getting on the bike since the accident in season 3. Maybe it’s during the bike competition? He promise her he won���t do anything stupid that would get him hurt, but he’s JJ so things always turn to shit
Request: being John b's sister and dating JJ when he's doing that motocross competition. He does it to earn some money back
I have not seen season 4 yet, so I have no idea of the context of the race, so don't come yelling at me because it's not what happened in the show. I also decided to not make it go to shit, because that one accident was enough trauma
Warnings: slight ptsd, JJ making stupid jokes, mention of motocross accident (season 3),
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‘’I don’t like this...’’ 
You wrapped your arms around yourself as you stood by JJ and his bike, getting flashes of the accident and the utter distress you felt when you couldn’t find him after he fell over the overpass. You never wanted to relive that type of emotion again. 
At your reaction, JJ grabbed your arms, his voice dropping to a soothing tone. ‘’I know you're worried for me, but I need to do this. If I win, I’ll get a lot of money…and make up for spending most of the gold money on my old house,’’ he explained, trying to calm your worries. His eyes shifted to Pope and the others. ‘’No one’s gonna be mad at me anymore.’’
You understood his reason for signing up for the competition, but you couldn’t support it. There had to be something else he could do. Not a fucking motocross competition. Anything but that.
‘’I’m gonna be fine,’’ he added, lifting your chin and looking into your eyes. ‘’This is just a race in the sand, not a police chase.’’ 
That earned him a glare. 
‘’JJ, the last time I saw you on a bike—’’  Your voice faltered, the knot in your stomach tightening painfully.
Realizing his joke fell flat, JJ pulled you into a tight embrace, holding you close. His hand rubbed soothing circles on your back, trying to calm you down. Sometimes he wanted to smack himself for saying stupid things…
The crash haunted him too, no question about it. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t feel a surge of panic when he lost control of the bike and tumbled down the overpass. But it was different for you — you had watched it happen from Topper’s truck, helpless as he fell. You and Sarah screamed for him, only to receive no answers. You thought he had died from the crash. 
Too soon to your liking, a loud noise echoed over the speakers, calling all racers to the starting line. You reluctantly pulled away from JJ and walked off with Kiara, linking her arms with yours in silent support.
You went up the stands to find seats, taking the spot beside your brother. You gripped the edge of the seat as you glanced at the racetrack, then the starting line where JJ sat on his bike, revving up with the others. You’ve been trying to prepare yourself mentally for weeks, but you don’t think you’ll ever be ready to see the boy you loved getting back on a bike that almost took his life.
‘’Don’t worry, he’s got this,’’ John B. said, wrapping an arm around you. He smiled, but you could see the flicker of concern in his eyes too. You all knew what happened last time, even if no one was saying it out loud. ‘’And he’s got protective gear this time.’’
Injuries can still happen with protective gear. You’ve read about it online. 
You could barely breathe as the starter raised the flag, and the crowd fell into an anticipatory hush. JJ pulled down the visor of his helmet, a familiar cocky smile tugging at his lips, then the flag dropped.
The race exploded into motion. The bikes shot off, kicking up a massive cloud of dust. The roar of engines filled your ears, drowning out everything else. Your heart raced faster than the bikes on the track as you gripped the bench beneath you, your knuckles going white.
Kiara followed JJ with her eyes, her voice loud enough to cut through the noise. "He's in third already!" she shouted, trying to add some enthusiasm.
''Come on, JJ,'' Pope added, looking almost just as nervous as you. 
Your eyes stayed glued to JJ, weaving between riders as the pack hurtled toward the first turn. Every bump, every jump had you holding your breath, afraid that any second things could go wrong.
It was impossible not to relive the accident in your mind — the way he flew over the edge, the bike spinning out of control. But this time, you tried to push those images aside, focusing on the present, on him. You needed to believe he could make it through.
The first turn came up fast, the riders leaning hard into it, and your heart lurched as JJ took the inside path, overtaking the guy in second place. The crowd roared, and for a moment, the adrenaline made you forget your worry, just watching him race.
Although this bike brought back bad memories, it held good ones too. All the times you’ve sat behind JJ and held onto his waist as he sped through the streets of Kildare…and the muddy shortcuts. When he tried to teach you how to drive it, but you ended up making out while you were sitting on the bike instead. John B. would kill him if he knew. 
By the third lap, JJ was neck-and-neck with the leader. The crowd around you was on their feet, yelling and cheering, but all you could focus on was JJ, pushing his bike harder, faster, determined to take first place. 
‘’Oh my god, he’s in first!’’ Sarah shouted as he took a turn for the final lap, getting caught up in the excitement. ‘’Come on, JJ! One more lap!’’ 
Your pulse hammered in your ears as he flew toward the line. The guy on the blue bike was trying to go past JJ, the bikes barely separated by inches, but JJ was still leading. 
And then, in a flash, it was over.
JJ crossed the line, just a split second ahead.
Around you, everyone was jumping and cheering while you stood there. A mix of excitement, relief and joy washed through you, together a strange and confusing cocktail. Kiara wrapped her arms around you, a wide grin on his face, and everyone else joined, celebrating JJ’s big win. All the anxiety and fear suddenly melted away, replaced by pure excitement. Your hands were shaking but your heart was pounding with adrenaline and happiness. 
As soon as you could, you all made your way down the stand, wanting to congratulate JJ. You pushed your way through the throngs of people until you finally caught sight of him. He was still in his racing gear, including the helmet, but he had taken the visor off, and you could see his face glistened with sweat. 
You ran toward him, a wide grin on your face, but before you could say anything, he saw you and pulled you into a tight hug, lifting you off the ground. 
''I told you I would win,'' he said, mirroring your grin. 
You squealed in surprise as your feet left the ground, holding onto him tightly. The familiar scent of sweat, adrenaline, and just a hint of motor oil filled your nostrils, evoking a mix of feelings. You laughed, wrapping your arms around his neck.
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hellodropbear · 5 months ago
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like she used to
alexia putellas x sister
i have been writing this for ages and it has just sat in my documents folder since january. i don't usually post stuff i write so this will probably get taken down at some point. i've written 13k words so far but this is just the first 4k.
~~~~~~
I hadn't expected to get the call up, not at all really. But Mapi tore her meniscus and apparently the first team found themselves in need of a backup centre back and I was the best option from the B team. It's a compliment, really. Mami is very proud of me and she is excited for me and my sister to play together in a few weeks, even though she is still recovering from her surgery and I will probably not make it off the bench. I am only 15 and 10 months, usually they wait until you are at least 16 and a bit before you can play. 
But, I don't really know how to feel. Thankfully Alexia won't be in training with me for now and I try to avoid thinking about what will happen when she eventually gets better and I have to face her again.
Alexia is my older sister by a lot. There's a 14 year age gap between us and I used to completely and utterly idolise her. She and Alba were two superheroes, always by my side when I needed them. I put them on a pedestal like they were the greatest human beings to ever walk the planet. To me back then, they were. 
I was only four when my father died. All I remember from that time was the big black invisible sheet that hung outside his study and the dark and scary emotions that swallowed our house whole. Alba and Alexia would argue about who got to cuddle me at night and I was so unaware what was happening that I would happily agree, wiping away their tears when it all got too much. 
The death of our father made our family unit stronger. Mami, Ale, Alba and Elena - it was all any of us needed and we supported each other in whatever ways we could. 
Mami had to pick up more shifts at her job, so she couldn't pick me up from school. Alexia had just got her license so she would come in a break during training and pick me up in her training gear. 
Alexia didn't have time to drop me off at home so I would sit and watch the training with whoever wanted to give me company when they were injured. 
Most days, Alba would come and pick me up and take me on the bus all the way home. She would play cartoons on the TV as she sat at the table and did school work. Some days, when she had the time she would sit with me and watch Alexia's training and we'd all go home together. Alba used to say she enjoyed the training. Looking back, I think she just wanted a free ride home and an excuse to not do her homework. 
As I grew up, everything just worked. Alexia and Alba were still living at home as a support to Mami and everything was perfect. My sisters were my idols, my Mami was my shining star. She still is. She would do anything for her daughters, as long as it meant we were all happy. 
That is why it has been so hard for her over the past two years. 
I have not been happy, not really. My football has been thriving, I have represented my country in the under 17 age group and I am a consistent starter in the Barcelona B team. I spent two years in La Masia before they sent me to the B team last year and I have only been improving since. Everything is going well. Mami says I have had a better start to my career than Alexia did. 
Maybe that is why Alexia hates me. Maybe Mami is just saying that to make me feel better about it.
Alexia and I, despite the 14 year age gap, were always inseparable - for the first 12 years of my life. She was at every single school event, football game, she picked me up from trainings when she could and would train me herself in the garden. We shared a common passion that Alba was not interested in at all - we both love football, we eat, sleep and breath it. Football is everything. She was the one who gave me that mentality. 
"Football is life, Lena, you are lucky you are so good because now you also get to live football and hermanita, it is the most incredible thing." 
She had whispered that to me when I was 11. We were sat on the beach, a place we visited frequently throughout my childhood, both of us staring out at the reflection of the moon on the sea. Alba was fast asleep, her head in Alexia's lap as she snored lightly, completely oblivious to our conversation. 
It all fell apart over three years ago, although I don't have the first clue as to why. 
It was not an explicit event that ruined everything, more my older sister growing up and flying the nest that was so secure and established over years and years of shared success, happiness, failure and grief. She moved out of home long before that, but her split with Jenni upset her, I think, a great deal. I wouldn't know because she didn't really tell me anything - that was strictly Alba's business. 
I didn't even know they had broken up until 5 months after it actually happened. 
"Mami, why does Jenni never come over any more?" 
It was an innocent and normal question, but the look on my mother's face told me everything. Everything about Jenni and everything about my sister. 
I think that was the first knock. She hadn't done anything wrong but I had loved Jenni and Jenni had loved me. I would have thought that she would have told me they broke up. Maybe she didn't want to, maybe she just forgot. She does a lot of that these days. 
Before she and Jenni broke up, she still came to all of my games. She never missed one game before I transferred to La Masia and would insist on taking me out to ice cream after every one. She would tease me for not scoring like she does, even though I play as a centre back. 
"You need some training from Mapi, she is a centre back and has the most lethal free kick, hermanita! She is the best defender I have played with, but don't tell her I said that. I think you will grow up to be better than her." 
She was excited that day, I had made a few good saves and I think that was the first time she really saw that I had the potential to be great. 
I remember the first game she was late to. I noticed immediately but we both pretended she was on time - she only made it to the last 10 minutes but I put it down as traffic or being caught up at training. She was busy, it takes a lot to be La Reina. 
I remember the first game she missed entirely. She wasn't there at the beginning and she wasn't there at the end. I was 13 and I didn't have a phone yet so I couldn't call Mami and ask her to come pick me up because Alexia was too busy. I told myself it was because she was too busy. I didn't want to say she had forgotten because that was too hard for me to handle. 
I remember vividly sitting outside the stadium as the sun set. My coach had asked where my sister was, I was a bit stuck with what to say but I managed to convince her I was fine and she could go home. 
Alba came and picked me up after work that night. It was dark and she looked sad but when I asked if she was ok, she just shrugged her shoulders and said everything would be fine. 
I found out from Mami a few weeks later that Alba was sad because I had never once been forgotten anywhere. Alba saw that as the destruction of our strong family. I suppose she was not wrong. 
Alexia never said anything about that game but she was at the next. She didn't take me out for ice cream after, instead patting my head and telling me she would drop me off at Mami's work. 
"I have things to do, Elena, I am very busy. Hopefully soon Mami will let you catch the bus on your own. Maybe Alba can take you soon so you know the correct routes." 
Her words hurt more than I could admit to myself, I told myself to stop being pathetic. Mami asked why I was crying when I walked into her office. I told her I had played terribly and she comforted me. I think she knew I was lying. I think that is why she had tears in her eyes when she released me from her grip-like hold.
Since that day, Alexia has been to 3 of my games. She went to one more of my old club games but she was sat beside Alba, her eyes glued to her phone the entire match. I was so unfocused that the ball deflected off my face and we conceded. I was taken off with a bleeding nose but when I looked up in the stands, my sister was still staring at her phone. Alba had run down the stairs and was by my side when I entered the little sick bay. 
I cried then too. Most people thought it was because of the bleeding nose or the conceded goal. Alba knew that wasn't the real reason. 
The penultimate game she watched was the final of the under 15s Catalonia cup. I don't know what she did during the game because Mami told me not to look up. She said she didn't want me to get distracted but I think she meant to say she didn't want me to get hurt. 
I think I still idolised Alexia at that point in time. She was still my older sister and she was still the best player in the world. She still had weekly dinners at home, although she wouldn't sit next to me and sneakily take all the food I didn't want off my plate anymore. She stopped staying to watch a movie after dinner even though my favourite part of the week was falling asleep in her lap as her hands combed softly through my hair. 
I remember when I was accepted into La Masia, Mami held a nice big dinner. It was right in the middle of covid so it was technically illegal, but we had a lot of my family over. Mami invited a few of the Barcelona girls as well and Mapi and Leila reminded me of what it used to be like before Alexia stopped loving me. 
The reminder of the before was more painful than I liked to admit, and the night ended when the tears that had been burning in the back of my eyes finally spilled out as I was talking to Mapi. 
She immediately pulled me into her arms and asked what was wrong and I struggled to find a lie that would be believable. 
I settled on saying I was upset about everything changing - which I suppose was true. 
I remember Alexia looking mortified and breaking eye contact as soon as I looked at her. She told me off that evening when Mami was in the shower and Alba was talking to someone else. She told me I needed to be grateful for everything I have been given and that she paved the way for me. 
It was even worse when she said I would never achieve the things she has. She said it was because I didn't have the mentality that she did, that I had it all so easy. 
It hurt the most when she told me she was disappointed in the person I was. 
"I hope we never share a shirt, Elena, because the day you play in the first Barcelona team is the day that we have run out of players. It will mean that football players are week and female footballers can not be weak. You do not have it in you to be like me, to do what I have done to get to where I am."
The venom in her voice sent a cold shiver down my spine and I felt like I had been stabbed. I didn't cry that time. I waited until I was in my bedroom to sob my heart out. 
The last time she ever watched me play was the next day, but she didn't have an option not to. I played terribly, my first game as a La Masia student, my sisters words repeating over and over in my head. 
That was really what tipped the relationship I once shared with Alexia on its head. The pedestal I had put her on was destroyed and suddenly she was just another player. I barely saw her as my sister any more. She couldn't love me, you wouldn't be able to hurt someone you love so much. 
I have barely seen her since. She still comes to our family dinners on Thursday nights - she still very much loves Alba and our Mami. But I tell Mami that I have training with Barcelona B late on Thursdays. It finishes at 6 and dinner starts at 7, but I just organise to go to my friends' houses for dinner instead. 
Sometimes we both have dinner together at home, but it is awkward and I hate it. I think she has probably forgotten about what she said to me in June of 2021, but I don't think I will ever be able to. 
She doesn't like me, but it's ok because I have learnt to accept that. But I will never not love my sister because she was once everything to me. 
~~~~~~
"Pequena Putellas!" Patri's excited shriek is what welcomes me into the dressing room on my first day. She tackles me into a hug and squeezes me tight. "It has been such a long time, mi favorita!" 
The last time I saw Patri was only last year at the champions league final. I had sat with my whole family but I went to the bathroom when everyone else went and spoke to the players. I don't think Patri would have seen me. 
I can only smile as she continues. 
"I remember you as the little 8 year old who would sit and watch our training sessions after school! I was so confused by you when I first arrived here, you know. I remember the first time Ale let you play a game with us and you were so good!" 
"Nobody doubted that you would be on this team one day!" A new voice entered the conversation.
"Marta!" I hugged the brunette closely. She was always one of my favourites. 
"I am proud of you, pequena putellas." 
Her words are familiar as I have heard them out of my mothers voice time and time again my whole life. But they seem foreign coming from Marta and it is an unwanted reminder of my sister. I don't know why - maybe it is because I have always associated this Barcelona team with her. I don't remember the last time she said she was proud of me. 
I don't remember the last time she said anything to me, really. 
"Gracias, Marta, I have missed you." I bury my head into her neck and she holds me closer. 
"You have not been around as much since you transferred to La Masia. I wanted to come and watch but Ale never extended an invitation and I didn't want to overstep." I shake my heads at her words and she frowns. 
"Alexia doesn't have time for my games, she hasn't for a while. It takes a lot to be La Reina." 
Marta's frown deepens at my words and the attention of a few spanish players is captured. I should have spoken quieter, I forgot how many people in here speak catalan. 
"It is ok, she is very supportive, but she just can't come to my games. She makes it up in other ways." I am lying through my teeth but Marta will never know. 
"I am sure, she must be very proud of you, being selected in this team for the first time, it is a big deal, you are very young."
All I can do is nod, my energy is all being put into holding back my own tears. I don't know if Mami told her. I don't know if Alexia even knows that I was selected. 
"Get changed now, I am sure Jona will want to talk to you before the session, especially with the game tomorrow."
I nod again as Marta pats me on the back and walk over to the cubby that says my name. It feels a bit surreal, really. 
I never really thought I would see my name on a Barcelona cubby, accompanied by my new number that I chose in the meeting a few days ago. It was always a dream, but I never thought it was achievable. Alexia always seemed like a superstar, a superhuman of sorts and I would never reach that kind of level. 
But here I am in the team that I always wanted to be in - in no way am I anywhere near my sisters level but I am on my way to being like her. I just wish she cared. I wish she was proud of me like Marta is. 
Her cubby sits across from me and I try to tear my eyes from it but it sits and stares right back at me. I feel like an intruder in Alexia's space, this is not for me, she would not want me to be here. 
I tie my laces quickly after that and head out onto the pitches to begin training. 
I have trained with the first team twice before, but the Barcelona Bs were always slightly seperate and we could keep our distance from the first players. Jonatan is a familiar face and I feel comfortable as he smiles and me and motions for me to follow the others to the gym. 
It is weird, being promoted within my own club. I am not so much a new signing, but a replacement - I am not good enough to be in the first team but they had no other options when Mapi injured herself. 
I used to worry that people would say I only get opportunities because my last name is Putellas. When my sister told me I was weak all those years ago, that idea sort of cemented in my head, I suppose. 
I never told my Mami what her daughter said to me because it would upset her. I told Alba half of it when she found me crying in my room a few days later but made her promise to not tell anyone. She couldn't say anything to Mami, Alexia, anyone at all because it would only make Alexia think I was weaker. 
She was furious and tried to tell me it was untrue but it had already been said. I believed Alexia's word more than anyone else. To me, she was a superhuman. 
But when I spoke to Jonatan a few days ago he made me feel like I was wanted within this squad. He made it clear that he wants me to integrate completely into the squad in the next few years and that he can see me playing soon even though I am only 15. 
I told him I didn't want anything special because of my surname. 
He told me that he chose me because of my first name. 
"Elena Putellas,"  he said with a grin, "you may be as good as her, but you are not your sister. This is a professional environment. As long as you perform, which I know you will, nobody will care what your name is."
It was a big boost to my confidence. 
Aitana Bonmati caught up to me quickly as I walked to the gym. 
"You are big now." I chuckled but did not look over, I didn't need to really. "But not that big. You are only 15, si?"
"Yes, I am 15." 
I met Aitana when she first joined the club. She always used to say that she would steal me and take me home with her because she thought I was adorable. It is strange that I am now sort of in the same team as her. 
She started playing for the first team when I was 8. I was older then, I played my own football and liked staying with Alexia so I could kick a ball around with her teammates when they were done. 
Aitana was one of the few who would stay every time I was there. When Alexia didn't want to wait she would drive me home herself, all the way to the other side of Barcelona. We would always stop for ice cream on the way home. 
"I have not seen you in too long, Lena. I have missed you a lot but you have been doing very well in the B team. I am very proud and I take credit for your abilities." She spoke in such a dead pan voice but it was somehow still filled with emotion. 
"I have missed you too, ABC." It was a nickname I gave her the first time she drove me home. I had been learning about the alphabet in English class and had the little song stuck in my head when she told me her full name. I used to sing her initials in the tune of the song but it quickly merged to me just saying the three letters. 
"I have been to a few of your games, you know?" 
I look at her in confusion, I have never seen her there. She just nods. 
"Alexia never invited any of us but she was never at the ones I went to so I would sit in the stands with a hat and glasses so people wouldn't recognise me, but I was there. I went to your La Masia games as well. You have become a phenomenal player, Lena."
She has always spoken with such sincerity. I have missed her a lot. 
"Maybe you can drop me off at home again tonight? I have missed you."
She chuckles and pulls me into a side hug. 
"I was waiting for you to ask, little Lena. Oh you are not so little any more!"
I chuckle as well and let my head fall onto her shoulder as we enter the gym. My eyes scan the room, looking at all of the players on their equipment, nerves quickly settling inside me. 
"Don't worry, it's all easy." Aitana seems to read my mind. "Just come with me and I will show you how to do everything. It will become second nature in the next few days."
The gym session went quickly as I was taught all the different exercises. I was familiar with most of them, having done a very similar program in the past with the B team. 
We went out onto the field to do some drills and I played well. Jonatan was impressed and so were the first players. My teammates? Maybe, not quite, I don't think. I still haven't been in a team list, so I suppose I'll be their teammate when that eventually happens. 
It wasn't until we reached the ice cream shop that Aitana started asking me all the awkward questions. I should have seen it coming. 
"Why do you never come to our games anymore, Lena?" I was very grateful for the scoops of gelato in my hands. Eating it delayed my response as I tried to come up with something to say. I shrug as I eat.
I can not say it is because I do not get along with Alexia. It is too hard for me to say now, even after all these years. 
"I'm not sure. I suppose I got busy with my own training and school. I have been to a few but I usually go home with Alba pretty quickly after they finish." It is only half a lie but she just shrugs, apparently not believing my words. 
"And why is it that I am driving you home from your first ever first team training? I thought Alexia would have wanted to." I anticipated a question like this but that does not mean I wanted her to actually ask it. 
"Alexia is busy." I hope that Aitana understands I don't want to talk about it. I haven't spoken about my broken relationship with my sister to anyone. I think she can sense something is wrong though, because she puts her spoon back into her ice cream and grabs my arm so I am staring right at her. 
"If you ever want to talk, I am right here, Lena. I know you don't like people knowing what is going on inside that crazy head of yours but it is good to release your feelings." 
She definitely knows something is wrong so I appreciate her not pushing. 
"I have outlets, I play football, I play the piano, I am ok, aitana, I really am." 
She eyed me as if to say she didn't believe me but dropped the topic anyway. 
"When did you get so good?"
chapter II
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peachesofteal · 1 year ago
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OHHHH I SEE WE ALL HAVE OMEGAVERSE FRENZY IN THIS HOUSE
What if Darling DID INDEED take suppressants for almost all her life after she presented as omega
BUT but but the reason she was off them was because a doctor told her she was in risk of losing all her ability to produce pheromones.
“Losing your capability of producing pheromones can come with a number of issues,” she tells you. “For starters, your heat cycles would be reduced to at least half of their frequency. There is also a decrease of libido, as well as a decrease in fertility. It is also not uncommon for omegas to experience separation or breakup with their partners, especially if they're alphas, but not to be–”. However, you stopped listening after separation.
You thought about that comment your co-worker made in passing about being dumped by his two alpha partners after he couldn't carry pups due to hormonal problems. He was promptly thrown out into the streets. Abandoned. Tossed away like a broken glass; no purpose and no means for existing, nor to fix it.
Surely, they wouldn't leave you for something like that, could they? But then the back of your mind whispered with its little secrets and ideas. Sure, your secondary gender wasn't all that glued you to them, but it had something to do, at least, right? A happy, little omega waiting for them at home.
“There are, however, solutions and treatments that we could possibly try.”
That snaps you out of your own thoughts.
“When was your last heat?”
You could vividly remember it. Your then partner asking you once more to sleep separately from them, because your heats not only bothered them, but also disgusted them.
“More than five years ago.”
Your doctor then stayed quiet for a few moments, the gears in her mind working.
“There is a possibility of this change in your glands to revert back to what it was, but you might have to forget about suppressants for a year at least.”
And Darling says yes, whatever it takes.
And this is how Darling had to stop taking suppressants for a year and deal with a heat every two months, and while that did indeed helped to start reverting the alteration in her glands, it also left her to deal with her own heats alone.
She never asked for help because she always knew when Simon and Johnny had their ruts, usually staying a couple days on base even though the op was over. Because she didn't want to think wrongly of them (would they be disgusted with her heat cycles just like it happened, out of the blue, in her three past relationships?), but also she really didn't want to be a bother to them. There was a reason why they stayed on base while they went through their ruts and decided not to come home to her. So she got through her heats and welcomed them both home with cuddles and stories about her job.
(Not knowing that the reason they didn't come to her while rutting, was because they didn't want to overwhelm her, and their shared ruts could get pretty rough in bed, very different from what they wanted to happen when fantasizing about you letting them take care of your heats)
And imagine once Johnny and Simon find out about this, when you tell them in the middle of a fever induced ramble, in tears.
About how Darling not only doesn't trust them to deal with her heats but is also afraid of them being disgusted with her, afraid of them abandoning her once she (in her mind) became useless to them 👁️👁️ both hurt and betrayed by this, but torn because they desperately want Darling to at least let them bring her snacks and clothes.
(But also I love the angst. It makes the thought of Johnny and Simon eventually helping Darling through her heats more satisfactory LMAO The thought of Soap and Ghost banging Darling until they kick out the insecurity out of her is tempting)
— 🫔 Anon, with love to you Peach and everyone else that's feral for omegaverse right now, just like me 🥰 fr I wish the best for you all A/B/O enthusiasts and especially for you Peach, for creating not only excellent work but also a safe space to talk about unhinged AUs<3
TAMALE 🫔 ANON 🫔 I love you and your beautiful brain. Never leave me. Stay here in our safe little au bubble forever.
And this anon! Lots of love 🩵 your brainchild really got to me
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18+ MDNI / Dead Disco omegaverse au / Mature themes / I still have no idea what we're doing with these but let's go with it
At first, you think it’s a fever.
Your head is cloudy, like you’re in some sort of sick fog. You try over and over to focus on your work, but after you make the same mistake on paperwork, three times in a row.
But when your stomach starts to cramp, sweat slicking along your lower back, you know it’s not just a fever.
You know it’s something else.
You fire off an email to your boss referencing your heat leave before you lock your office for the week, week and a half you’ll be gone.
You’re not particularly ready for this one. You haven’t gone to the grocery store. You haven’t washed your linens, haven’t collected the usual pile of hoodies and shirts for nesting.
Not to mention, the timing. The guys have already been gone for two weeks. They could come home in the middle of it, could discover your lie, all your lies. About the suppressants. About your feelings. About the truth.
“You have to come off the suppressants.” You blink, trying to register her words.
“N-no. I… I can’t.” She doesn’t understand. You can’t go off your suppressants. The guys… they share each other’s ruts, they don’t need a heat cycle on top of it.
She says your name with sigh, before glancing at you over her glasses, lips twisted.
“Are you in safe place now? A safe home? With a pack?”
“Yes but they’re not my mates, obviously.” You’ve always been insistent that you don’t need the bite to be with the guys, that you don’t need a heat to be in a relationship with them. That you’re enough, the way you are. After what happened to you in your young life, you had vowed to stay on suppressants for the rest of your life. And even though they didn’t know the truth of everything, they supported you.
And they’ve always agreed. They’ve never pushed you, about the suppressants. Never tried to bully you or convince you otherwise. They’ve always told you they love you, no matter what.
But will they feel the same now? If you change? If you turn into some heat driven Omega?
They already have each other to satisfy themselves. Would they even know what to do with a heat? Would they even want to?
“You’re in a safe place. Your life has changed so much, don’t you think it’s time you give yourself a chance?” She doesn’t get it. They won’t want this. Won’t want you.
“I can’t, I-“
“It’s your decision to make, but I want you to be fully aware of the risks. The suppressants are impacting your ability to produce pheromones. If it continues, your fertility will also be negatively affected.” Your stomach sinks like a stone. Fertility. The one thing you and Johnny and Simon whisper about in the dark sometimes, a baby, or two, a family. “Do you understand?” She’s kind, sympathetic but firm, and you nod.
“Yes.”
You’ve known there’s something amiss with you, and your cycle. That there’s something wrong with your heats. You spend most of them in the closet, or under the bed, fighting flashbacks of your past and trying bring yourself relief to no avail. When you come out of them, you’re often confused. Disorientated. Missing entire days. It’s almost like you’re not even really there, and sometimes you catch yourself rubbing your gland with your wrist, trying to mimic a scenting by an Alpha. One of your Alphas.
Google tells you that it’s common for traumatized Omegas to react this way. That Omegas who have been abandoned or lost their mates, often try to self soothe during their cycles. Omegas who have been abused.
You usually stop doom scrolling once you get to articles about failed bonds and bites, opting to to bury your face in one of the pillows, trying not to scream out your frustration. Trying to to get lost in your own panic, the fog that’s settling further and further into your mind, making it harder for you discern fact from fiction.
Eventually, you can’t fight it anymore. Your instincts take over, pushing into a space that feels too warm, too close, while your body rages, stomach twisting up in awful cramps. You burrow yourself in the closet, piling your blankets and pillows and articles of clothing until it feels almost right.
It does nothing to drown out the thoughts in your head. Your hindbrain is in control now. It’s taken over, buried common sense for instinct.
It’s not right. Your mates aren’t here. They left you. Your Alphas don’t want you.
You have no mates. No one to breed you. No one to give you what you need.
You’re alone. You’re not safe.
It’s going to happen again.
“Omega?” There’s a voice, calling to you. Two scents that are familiar, woodsmoke and gunpowder, juniper and ocean spray. “Hey, there ye are.”
A hand reaches towards you, and you press yourself against the wall. Don’t touch. Don’t let them touch.
“Darling,” that name. You know that name. “it’s okay. It’s us, you’re alright.”
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Sword gays showdown preliminaries
Propaganda:
For Kazuma Asogi:
ok so he’s not CANONICALLY queer but it’s ace attorney. so… he does, however, canonically have a katana! a sword so integral to the plot it gives me shivers just thinking about it. the sword also has a name, it’s karuma (translates roughly to karma) and it gets passed onto the main character, ryunosuke naruhodo (who he calls partner), after kazuma (spoiler alert) dies in case 1-2. except (SUPER spoiler alert!) he isn’t dead! he comes back in case 2-3 and would you look at that he has ANOTHER SWORD, a more european sword (cause he ended up in england after his amnesia brain said he REALLY had to go to england). once he gets his memories back, ryunosuke gives karuma back to him and proceeds to use it to destroy the wax figure of his dead presumed serial killer dad (long story), and now he has, you guessed it, TWO SWORDS! for the next two cases he wears both swords at his sides, and also he broke the tip off of karuma attempting to murder someone (he didn’t actually murder anyone but still) and then turns out karuma’s hilt has the REAL serial killer’s will in it. very VERY important sword. in the end, kazuma gives karuma back to ryunosuke which is really symbolic but that’s besides the point, and they cross swords and it’s a whole big thing. 10/10 gay sword guy.
For Raiden:
Man catches knives with his heels and uses a sword to cut through robots 20 times his size
He's such a tragic character! Raised to be a super soldier from birth and is constantly being exploited by the government. As for the lgbt part him and his rival in the latest game he's in have so much tension it's unreal (gay). I headcanon him as trans too because he has a feminine figure, his voice gets more masculine as the series goes on (testosterone) and his entire body gets replaced with cybernetics (trans allegory...)
For Claudine Saijou:
Fights with a longsword! Should be number 1 for this line alone: “For heroes, there are trials. For saints, there are temptations. For me, there is you”, said to def not her girl crush but rival btw (stream Revue of Soul) Vote for my disaster theatre kid its what she deserves!
Her gay levels are off the charts. She has a homoerotic rivalry with another classmate (Maya Tendo/Tendou Maya) that is integral to her character, as she was always first until she met Maya. She’s also half-French, but that’ll be important later. When she’s looking at pictures of Maya stretching (to study her form of course) and another character asks her what she’s looking at, she panics, blushes, and says none of your business. Her and Maya have a heartfelt conversation while stretching with Claudine’s face pressed into Maya’s chest (between her stomach and breasts). Some art from a magazine has Maya pushing Claudine into a deep stretch, but it looks like something a lot different (Claudine blushing doesn’t help. Also I realized that there’s a lot of gay stuff related to stretching with these two).
During a two on two duel (I know it’s not a duel), they fight together. Not only that, but at one point they hold hands and take a pose typical of romantic partners in dancing. For no reason. They just pause and do it to show off. They aren’t even fighting. Anyways, when they lose, Claudine starts crying, not because she lost, but because Maya lost. So, of course, Maya starts speaking to her in French, with one of the things she says being “You’re cute even when you cry, my Claudine.” All of this is stuff that’s happened in the series (except the magazine thing).
Now for the gay stuff in the movie. Their duel with each other is so dense with sapphic undertones they can hardly be called undertones. For starters, the song that accompanies this revue is called “A Beautiful Person, or Perhaps it is.” While this title is incomplete, the director states that he wanted the watcher to fill it in and this removed the end of the original title. That title is “A Beautiful Person, or Perhaps it is a Love Song.” The duel is framed as a fight between a hero (Maya) and a devil (Claudine). Maya is in an outfit reminiscent of Renaissance Italy and Claudine is in a suit. Thus, Maya signs a contract giving her soul over to Claudine, as is the case with marriage. With her own blood, in the shape of Position Zero (an important symbol in the show), which happens to look like a T, for Tendou. After a few minutes of fighting, Maya disappears and monologues, appearing in a white dress. This means that Maya has signed her soul over to Claudine, and they are now both wearing a white dress and suit. Not beating the gay marriage allegations. Maya finished her monologue with “For heroes, there are trials. For saints, there are temptations. For me, there is a devil.” They continue to fight, Maya proclaiming herself emotionless and empty. Maya then cuts the medallion from Claudine’s chest (they wear medallions and you lose the duel if it gets cut off).
Claudine falls. Maya attempts to claim victory by stabbing her sword into Position Zero, which is then covered by steel doors. Claudine sits up and reveals she has another medallion in her mouth, which she does by sticking out her tongue in a uhhhh. Anyways, after a bit of back and forth, Claudine tells Maya that she’s full of arrogance and pride and envy and longing. She then says that “No matter how many times I die, I will revive! Tendou Maya! To beat you, my rival, into submission!” She then makes her stage entrance, taking Maya’s usual entrance speech and mocking it. She also says “I fill myself with exploding passion, now, and bash it into your heart!” After some talking, Maya makes her stage entrance, taking Claudine’s usual entrance speech and mocking it. Up until now, they have been playing characters, but still letting their own emotions shine through. Now, they are entirely themselves.
They begin to fight again, running downs white aisle before clashing swords, with Maya saying “Such an ugly, emotion drenched appearance-“ and is cut off by Claudine, who says “Show me more, Tendou Maya! Right now, you’re the cutest you’ve ever been!” To which Maya responds “I’m always cute!”  The song starts up again (duels are accompanied by songs), with Maya singing “With a grin of deception I’ll tear this piece of cloth.” Deception in Japanese is mayakashi, a reference to Maya’s name. Maya then sings “I want to show you my feelings becoming dyed in black.” Black is Kuro in Japanese. Claudine, in Katakana, is Kurodine, with her nickname being Kuro, so that line could also be interpreted “I want to show you my feelings becoming dyed in you.” Claudine then sings “Only me, always, forever,” before they sing in unison “You only need to look at me,” as they lock blades. Some fighting happens and they’re falling through the sky, holding onto each others clothes and Claudine says “Only I can make you lay everything bare!” To which Maya responds “I’ll expose my everything, on the stage!” Claudine shoots back with “There’s a partner you can expose everything to, on the stage!” At this point, there’s a short time with independent vocals for Maya and Claudine in addition to their talking. Maya has been singing “If I’m on the stage, if I’m in front of you,” for the last two lines of dialogue. Claudine sings “Be it ugly or beautiful,” as Maya sings “I will expose, anything and everything, all of me, all of me.” As this happens, Maya is saying “We love the stage,” which is continued by Claudine saying “And we can’t part from the stage!” Maya calls them both “Pathetic clowns!” To which Claudine corrects “No, rivals!” Maya says “If you’re there, I have to strive higher!” Claudine says “You make me even more beautiful! Maya!” Maya then yells “Claudine!” Claudine yells “For heroes, there are trials!” Maya continues “For saints, there are temptations!” Then, as one, their swords crossed, faces inches from each other, yell “For me, there is you!” Over top of this, their voices sing a line in unison: “Forever and ever, I’d like to cross swords with you.”
Claudine’s sword stabs through the contract, through the Position Zero in blood, which may be Maya’s family name, and Maya says as an aside “Saijou Claudine… You are beautiful.” Claudine cuts the medallion from Maya’s chest, finally beating her rival.
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rainbowgod666 · 8 months ago
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Wizardposting blogs and my view of them, OR:
My ass out here cataloguing wizards like they're pokemon 💀 i ran out of things to do fr 💀💀💀
@official-megumin: dutch (EDIT. SHE ISNT. I WRONGLY REMEMBERER A POST OF HERS. I KNOW HER ASS IS LIVING [OR FROM] NORTH EUROPE THO) megumin that still has the "only knows one spell and its the stupidest and hardest to unlock and use. Balancing the Meta my ass" problem. In a relationship with @a-sentient-cup
@autism--wizard: just a lil neurodivergent guy that likes spooders. Not much of it really. Possibly strong enough to defeat spiders georg
@the-adhd-sorcerer: moot :) also more powerful than they let on, but its like DBXV2: starter gear and GODLY stats
@mossy--wizard: moss-fueled neurodivergent boi with lots of moss. Yes their blog feels like a wet forest in the sunlight, drying up after a long rain. Not really interacted with them tho...
@wizard-council-bureaucrat: basically the MC of tumblr wizardposting. If they say something its either wizard law or just a suggestion. Probably the only wizard here that ISNT "surprisingly powerful even though their learning was less than advanced"
@wizard-intern: the blorbo.
@the-gnomish-bastard: ok i get that theyre basically pilaf from dragonball, but A: the stew arcanum is REAL bur the 24 gods thing either sounds like bullshit or he made a stew out of 24 REALLY HUBRIS-FILLED PEOPLE (which would explain his "holy fucking shit how are you even capable of HAVING A STRUCTURE WITH THE FUNCTION OF A BRAIN"), B: he was the dude that came up with the whole "floating wizard island thing" (which has so many holes like wtf put it back down) and C: im pretty sure they have been corrupted by some kind of mushroom deity, which would explain the fact that when calling him "stupid" its like SCP-682 saying that humans are disgusting. Because there literally isnt a stronger word in the human language. How in the fuck does someone have so little intellect we have to do like the jewish population of europe after 1945 when they came up with the word "shoah" to describe what happened to them. To the user running that blog. GET SOME PSYCHIATRIC HELP ASAP. Holy shit.
@not-a-suspicious-wizard: "I aM vErY tRuStWoRtHy" dude everyone knows you wanna do some weird "subjugate reality" bullshit. How about you start making drafts and NOT murdering opponents? Seriously dude if you wanna be in charge as long as you dont try weird "consolidating power like its the 1940s" shit its alright. Maybe take some craftmanship things as a hobby! Make your own throne! Come up with something to do when you are too tired to do Dominant King Bullshit! Play modded minecraft/terraria! Make origami! If youre gonna blanket the world in darkness, at least make it look cool and welcoming instead of "inevitable rebel uprising lol have fun with Prophetic Children lmao" :3
@incompetent-wizard: are you SURE youre incompetent? Chances are, you're just unlucky 😊
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il-gatto-fortunato · 2 months ago
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Gears of War | Open Starter
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[Intended for GoW FCs. Angst / romance / fluff / casual / social / character development all OK. Not really looking for smut but we can discuss at some point. 21+ only, older preferred.] See also: Other RP ideas and My Other GOW Starts.
Anya raps the door with quiet, desperate urgency. She knows she’s not supposed to open it. She knows he’s not supposed to see her. Bad luck, right? Because they’ve had such a streak of good shit happening to them lately. But she does crack it open, leaning her shoulder into it and putting her face near the gap. If he can’t open it, he can’t see her. If he can’t see her, then their luck is neither good nor bad. Schroedinger’s Luck. God, Baird would have something to say about that.
“Marcus. I don’t think I want to do this.”
Wow. No. That was absolutely not how she meant that to come out. She sighs and slumps her weight more firmly against the door. She already put on the dress. Hair and makeup is already done. Hell, it took Sam twenty minutes to figure out how to pin the birdcage veil in place without it falling out. If not for the fact that she was still in stocking feet, she’d be ready to go. “I don’t mean marry you. I mean… this. This whole…” She looks down the carpeted corridor, the estate more alive now than it since E-Day. Urns of cascading flowers line the curving staircase she’s meant to come down, the first time he sees her. The string quartet paid to entertain guests during cocktail hour, and play them down the aisle, can be heard on the distant first floor.  Glasses are clinking, voices effervescent with laughter, whispers and chatter and conversations of probably two hundred people she really couldn’t give two shits about.
“This,” she says, expecting that explains it all.
He isn’t answering.  Maybe he’s disappointed.  Or irritated that she waited until precisely this moment to bring it up, and not the three months she spent tearing her hair out over every meaningless detail – china patterns, and canape selection, and the “first dance”.  As if either of them knows how to fucking dance.
Her cheek smashes to the door. His silence is probably all the answer she needs.
“It’s too late to unravel this, isn’t it?  To just… grab Cole and Baird and… just the people who matter, and… I don’t know.  Go down to that bridge by the duck pond.  Take a couple bottles of champagne with us?  Maybe steal a few trays of those little puff pastry things you were putting away by the dozen?” She smiles, starry-eyed, into thin air, but it fades.  God, why won’t he answer?  She breathes out, fingers curling around the door’s edge.
“…I’m pretty sure no one will even notice we’re gone.”
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stormbabylore · 17 days ago
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Glamtober | Day 14: Ranged
Aeryn's baby hair and gear (or close enough to)! \o/
Archer was Aeryn's starter class after she was (very rudely) turned away from the lancers' guild. Back then, I was just trying to figure out how to play the game and didn't really consider how it would have felt for her, not having a clue who or where she was, let alone how to use a bow and arrow, carefully watching everyone around her for signs of what to do and how to act because she could hardly speak up enough to ask and didn't know what else she was supposed to do.
I got a little emotional taking these... (╥﹏╥)
Overwhelmed, Aeryn huddled back in corners to observe during the day, then snuck in after hours to practice alone—until Luciane found her out. Rather than chastise her, the guildmaster praised her commitment and offered not only guidance but also much-needed encouragement.
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val-badgal · 2 months ago
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I yap about Happy Chaos’ Arcade Mode
I played against some of the AI and most of his arcade mode to see some unique interactions, and I’m gonna ramble about them here.
For starters, I fucking hate stage 9 Nagoriyuki. I beat up to stage 8 in Happy Chaos’ arcade mode because I heard he drops some interesting lore bombs, and we’ll get to those in a sec, but JESUS FUCK is stage 9 hard. I beat stage Nago 8 by cheesing with pauses and throws, and it took about 20 attempts. Naturally, I lost all faith in living when I learned that stage 9 was the same thing except Nago started with blood rage (I quit after 5 attempts). How about that lore though, eh? Well, Happy Chaos basically goes on a whole exposition after beating I-No a second time that “Demi-humans” (Nago and Slayer) basically transcend their universe and can travel to ALTERNATE UNIVERSES and basically just dumb themselves down for everyone else to look like they’re not breaking reality. They don’t have “IDs” in the backyard, either, which is how they’re able to travel through universes since they’re basically not a part of the rest of existence. The existence of AUs in Guilty Gear is an interesting one, and I’m curious if it’s how they’re going to justify Lucy from Cyberpunk crossing over when she’s released. Maybe it’ll even play into the next game? I mean, at the end of Strive’s story mode, Sol loses his gear powers, Ky gives up the throne, and Axl gets his girlfriend back. The three main characters of Guilty Gear’s basically all finish their arcs, and it makes me wonder if they pull something in the next game where it’s like “this is Sol Badguy from another universe where he keeps his powers!” so they can still have the same main cast as the other games. It’d be kinda stupid if they did, and I think Daisuke probably wouldn’t do something so cliche and lazy for his main characters, but it’s an interesting possibility to discuss.
Happy Chaos mentions Bedman in the same exposition, saying that he also managed to negate having an “ID” in the backyard. He says “Bedman”, not “Romeo”, which is probably just to make things easier to understand for the majority of the audience who doesn’t know Xrd Bedman’s real name, but it still got me thinking about what it could be in reference to.
It could be Bedman’s dream world. Bedman says right before he dies that he could always make the Absolute World on his own, but my guess with this new information is that his access to both the Absolute World and Dream World are actually existing worlds, and him “creating” the Absolute World just brings him to an alternate universe that already existed with the properties that would let him revive the people he’s killed, save Delilah, etc.
Him negating the “ID” system could be why the character of ‘Bedman?’ exists. Somehow, when Bedman died, he didn’t actually die, but rather figured out a way to reincarnate in the bed itself due to his lack of an ‘ID’ that would allow him to cheat the system. Then again, I’m pretty sure Bed’s Strive theme is about him going to the afterlife, so this one is really just me being hopeful since Xrd Bedman is my favorite fighting game character.
After I gave up on Stage 9 Nago, I googled the ending cutscene to see what other lore there might be. There’s not a lot, but it’s kind of exciting what’s there. Happy Chaos basically tells Nago why he’s returning to the world, which is to protect it from destroying itself from its self-destructive nature. This almost implies that Chaos is willing to play the hero if needed for humanity’s survival, which is a possibility that’s also very in character with how Chaos acts.
I recently discovered that Sin and Chaos also have unique dialogue when fighting each other, and while one of the exchanges are a cute little interaction about sugar water and milpico, the other one frames Sin as the “hero” of the metaphorical show Chaos is always talking about, which would make sense since the upcoming anime is starring him and now that Sol and Ky both stepped down Sin being the next protagonist makes a lot of sense. Considering that there’s hints of both Sin and Chaos being protagonists in the next game and they already have unique interactions with each other, maybe we’ll see them working together in the future? I’m very excited for the future of Guilty Gear lore, lol.
Anyway. I’ll suppress my autism and shut up now, and maybe go draw Sin and Chaos hanging out drinking each other’s favorite beverages while I’m at it. Thanks for reading and I apologize if this makes no sense. I’m happy to clarify my theories in the comments <3
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decimal86 · 1 month ago
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Failtopia Headcanons 2
Title says it all. Gonna say now that this list is a mix of serious and non-serious ideas, plus a few ideas for post-S2. Shared a lot of these with one of my mutuals, but I figured I'd share more with all of y'all. Enjoy!
While all fitting for warriors of some kind, there are a few minor specific differences in Erica, Orion, and Bob's starter gear. (Ex. Orion's armor is more well-kept and matching, since he was part of the royal guard. Meanwhile, Erica's is more worn down and mismatched since she at this point doesn't know how to maintain it and likely bought it on a budget from how much of a spur-of-the-moment decision it was.)
Bo's weird floating hands are more akin to an incorporeal extra pair to grab otherwise untouchable objects and interact with other undeads. Essentially, that one D&D ability, Mage Hand.
Due to being part fish, Shrimp is more heat sensitive than the rest of the cast. Neksdor would hypothetically be tough but doable, while Karkaton or the Powdered Peaks would be almost impossible if traversing alone. Luckily, she's not :D
Orion takes Slapo out trick-or-treating with whatever costumes she wants, so long as they're appropriate. One year, she was a brick. After S2, Chat and Petunyawn go, too with C!Failboat accompanying the latter.
Erica spent weeks after Bo's transformation into a vampire trying to raise her defense so her partner wouldn't have to stress over piercing her flesh while kissing and accidentally turning her into an undead.
Mar has an alcohol tolerance higher than any other living thing, being a demon, and thus has never been intoxicated. Still, he does his best to cure whatever hangovers may the others have with only the finest recipes he knows; if there's one thing he was passionate about since the start of his redemption arc, it's food.
Erica and C!Failboat remain close friends as, despite their less than ideal relationship in S1, Fail was Erica's first true friend after her string of terrible parties, and similarly, Erica was one of the first people that made him consider as more than a character—a real person, with struggles and emotions—that made him try taking his job seriously.
Deko now lives a quiet life in an off-the-map village somewhere in the Fey Realm. He works as a scout, finally able to live out his wish to help protect a community without fighting gods or being stuck in an overly tight demon suit. He also makes sketches and edgy poetry in his free time.
Chi celebrated her 21st birthday with a bowl of whiskey-flavored ice cream but, surprisingly, never felt any ill effects besides slight dizziness and a sugar crash.
Part of Piranhyawn being a terrible boyfriend comes simply from his species not requiring two individuals to mate, with both he and his daughter being a product of budding. (Note: not a justification, only an explanation)
Lanc was forced to learn how to play piano from their royal background—however, they dropped it and now play the accordion in their off time. Chi, of course, loves it.
C!Failboat actually does own some other clothes besides the cat onesie: a single white anchor-patterned button-up with jeans and tennis shoes, plus a full-on captain's uniform for some reason. He only wears it when the cat suit's in the wash.
While they haven't met yet, I'm certain Slapo and Purple Shep would get along perfectly.
I'm not sure if post-game can even be considered canon anymore, but the Deltarune fan song Megalo Clamour plays in Spamtang's head when he fights. Like the canon character's theme, but slightly more put-together and malicious.
Erica's actually more skilled with a spear than a sword, but only learns how to use it after the finale due to getting more free time to perfect her fighting style.
Chi has an excellent singing voice. Nobody knows why, not even Chi herself.
And that's all for now! Might do a part 3, but thank you for reading.
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waxsuyaaa · 8 months ago
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omg side order was so good
my annoying rant about everything down below⬇️ also if you dont have the dlc dont press the keep reading button
OKAY so for starters it was actually kinda disappointing to see that most of the gameplay has been shown already in the trailer, i would’ve liked to have been surprised..
and there is no feeling of progressing forward like any other storymode since you go to the start every single time you lose and all your achievements disappear unless you get into the boss fight, and only if you win you get one singular key
and all the powerups that you’re used to having just gone. poof. disappear.
i would’ve liked to see npcs that you can actually talk to because somehow there is no button to talk to pearl? like maybe they should have made a feature when you’re right underneath pearl to press A and talk to her for a bit, even if its something simple like “yo! let’s get back on track!”
you can’t even talk to marina and all she asks is if you need something to be hacked, which makes her seem as she’s just there for that mechanic and nothing else— as someone who never played splatoon 2 and doesnt know her personality im not sure what the hype is about for her
we should have been able to go into the elevator and actually walk around and talk to the characters and like salmon run, when it says ‘time to go to work!’ for side order it would say ‘arrived at floor’ or smth like that.. i would give anything to be able to walk around and interact with everyone in the elevator, like if the characters pearl, marina and dedf1sh weren’t there it would function the same
why arent we able to talk to them like. dedf1sh is such a cool character where is the lore? they just stand in a corner and is just there…
it would be so amazing if you could slowly befriend dedf1sh and get exclusive gear/random stuff from the metro or smth from them as the friendship points rack up and they become more open to you
and all the bosses are easy to tell apart from the silhouette and you can easily guess how you’re going to fight them, i want that little moment of mystery as well as not knowing how hard it’s going to be
coloured fingertips dont even seem like a thing anymore, it was just for agent 8 and her blue palette things
it looks as if you have to fight many of the same boss to get the locker key and after it just becomes repetitive and there is no story whatsoever, the villain is a glitchy entity called ‘order’??? like if that same glitchy entity thing switched to agent 4 for like half a frame the entire fandom would go WHOAH WHAT WAS THAT and we’d be talking about it for ten thousand days
the only motive is that you have to save everyone from being grayscaled blablabla but you dont even have any evidence of the character even being there, the character palettes are just a cheap way to implement more weapons, like what do you mean we don’t get the actual characters standing around the outside of the spire.. i want to talk to paul and warabi and ikkan (cough cough i mean quinn and mashup???)
we cant even get these extra characters because 3d modelling is SUCH a LOT of EFFORT for such a huge company like nintendo we should feel so sorry for all the work that they had to do, they put in their best effort (sarcasm)
all the enemies/foes are just remodelled salmon run enemies like battering largo or whatever (they could remodel the enemies but not the bands?? what)
also wheres cypher? i thought the shrimpy character would be a main character that wanders around and sells you stuff but theyre not even in sight
so uhh you can say ‘skill issue’ or smth because OHHH I HAVENT FINISHED THE GAME YEAH THIS PERSON IS JUST COMPLAINING BECAUSE THEYRE BAD AT IT or whatever im just disappointed that it was kinda overhyped and i drew art for a character that didnt even exist (skeleton agent 4)
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ahmedmootaz · 10 months ago
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If Ayin did distort, what kind of abilities would he have?
Dear Anonymous,
Good question! I've thought about it a lot, and I think that Ayin's Distortion would be mostly influenced by the traumas he endured, just as the Ensemble's members were all influenced by their most traumatic events;
Jae-Heon was influenced by how his son was run over by a road-roller and how his puppet was then destroyed by Roland, thus turning into a puppet-master and, subsequently, into an amalgamation of various different creatures, just like his puppets he made for Argalia.
Greta was influenced by how her fellow Eight-Chefs ate themselves and pushed themselves to the limit in the search for new tastes and flavours; her hunger and desire manifested in the form of a famished shark with many, many mouths in order to eat as much as she wanted.
And so on and so forth. If we were to follow the same formula for Ayin, I'd think that the events that marked/traumatised him the most had to be the Old Lab's raid by Garion, the Smoke War, and the loss of Carmen, so I believe his Distortion would have some form of connection to all three of these events.
Not to mention that, personally, I think Ayin was just a few wrong/right turns away in life from being the perfect Arbiter, and seeing how X manifested into a sick parody of an Arbiter himself, I'd think Ayin's Distortion would be quite similar, although with a few twists here and there.
For starters, I believe that his Arbiter gear would be more white-and-red instead of the standard and iconic gold-and-black issued to most Arbiters, mostly for the sake of artistic choices on my end, but also because I believe a Distortion would attempt to be different from the main enforcers of the City's order, as Carmen explicitly stated that, after she herself became the Voice of the Distortion, she was attempting to free the people from the City's cycle in her own, twisted way. As such, I believe she would help draw out a form that is at least visually distinct from Arbiters for her beloved Yinnie, of all people, seeing how he deserves that little pleasure the most, which is my explanation for how I'd explain this stylistic choice for Ayin while X's Distortion is a regular Arbiter outfit.
As for abilities, I'd personally assume they would be similar to what X possesses, to some degree, with typical Arbiter powers being the 'norm' for Ayin's Distortion, but I'd also assume that seeing how his trauma extends far beyond that of most of the PM characters we got to see so far, he'd also be able to tap into powers specifically from his time in the Smoke War. For example, I assume that he would be able to concentrate his powers to summon inter-dimensional portals like those used in the War, or perhaps even utilise the Smoke itself as one of his abilities to weaken opponents at the cost of it also adversely affecting him.
But I think what would also make him even more of a force to be reckoned with would be his relation to Abnormalities. I'm sure that he would resonate with quite a few Abnormality powers which Carmen would happily draw from him to make him into a bit of a indestructible force, although I'm not exactly sure on what Abnormality powers he would have access to, but one thing I am certain of is that he would without a doubt be able to manipulate blood to some extent or perhaps even mess with one's central nervous system, as an homage to his trauma with regards to Carmen. Perhaps he causes hallucinations or causes one's own mind to start attacking itself?
I think his biggest weakness would be his willingness to fight against his Distortion, it's just that he will need a lot of outside help to even have a chance at managing to ward off the Distortion, seeing how he's so full of repressed sentiments and emotions, and all of them bursting out as he Distorts would have quite the catastrophic consequences.
This was a really fun ask, and so I thank you, Anon, for providing me with it! I don't know if I can apply them somewhere soon, but this was quite fun to think of! As always, take care, stay safe, and see ya'!
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universalzones · 4 months ago
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"Gears and starters what happened to her?!" Belled asked, looking over an extremely injured tenrec that had just been placed on her worktable. "And why did you bring her to me?! She needs to see a doctor this instant!" Not to mention it was the middle of the night. Not that she needed sleep.
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"J-Just stop yelling, okay?! I panicked and didn't know who to go to! I mean, we were made by Starline so I don't think a doctor will cut it!" Kitsunami seemed to be just as freaked out as Belle right now. "And I don't trust anyone else not be nosy, alright?!" Tails was certainly off the table and no way he was going to tell anyone from the 'team' about this.
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Belle could see Kitsunami was freaking out more than she was so decided to dial it back. "What? I'm just a tinkerer. How would I know what to do?" The puppet had taken to mechanic's quickly, though no where near the level of something like this. "Not to mention I don't know how organic she is." For all she knew only a doctor could help.
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"W-Well, Starline used your code on our heads. S-So maybe he used m-more that just t-that. I don't know, I just n-never seen her this hurt. P-Please, help her." Kitsunami was on the verge of tears, struggling to keep it together by this point.
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Oh boy, Belle felt her mechanical heart strings being tugged at seeing Kitsunami trying to keep it together. Well, no harm in trying, right? "Alright, I'll see what I can do." The tinkerer walked over the passed out tenrec, unsure where to start. "May I scan her?" She discovered she had the ability to scan lifeforms after the events at Eggperial City.
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Kitsunami wiped away the tears that were starting to form, managing to calm himself down a bit. "O-Okay, though don't save it." The fennec would normally be against such things, though he was more concerned for Surge's safety right now.
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"You have my word Kitsunami." Belle was sure this was a big ask, though Kitsunami must truly be concerned if he so easily agreed to it, and she didn't intend to break that level of trust.
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Belle's eyes would turn red as she began to scan Surge, though was a bit surprised by what she was seeing. "Well, her entire skeletal structure seems to be incased heavily in metal, almost like a modified version Eggman's Metal Virus. She also has a layer of metallic muscles. Only about four internal organs seemed to have been replaced with mechanical ones, though everything else is organic." Truly a strange body if you asked her.
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"But is she okay? Normally she heals from damage like this, though she's not." Kitsunami was mainly concerned because she wasn't up and about yet. Normally it'd take at most thirty minutes, though she's been out for hours by this point.
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Belle wasn't a doctor, far from it, though she did have a large file over body structure and how it's supposed to look. "A few of her bone's have hairline factures, though are repairing themself as we speak. However I think it's taking so long is because whatever hit her caused some damage to a few of her vital organs so her body is focusing everything on that." Honestly it was a wonder how Surge was alive. With seeing everything she needed the tinkerer stopped scanning the tenrec, then deleted all the information she just got beyond what was wrong.
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"S-So what can we do? What should we do?" Kitsunami didn't feel comfortable just standing around and waiting, though Surge's body was healing on it's own which is good.
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"Well, since she has a layer of metallic muscles there's no way to get in there and try to help. Honestly, all we can do is patch all her outside injuries and tighten everything up." Pressure might help keep everything on the inside together better so it'll heal faster. "Thankfully since joining I've read many medical books so I can at least do simply work like this." The injuries outside weren't too bad showing just how tough Surge was. They were just numerous.
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"Okay, what can I do to help?" Kitsunami was glad there was something they could do, even if it wasn't much.
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"There should be an emergency medical kit over in the main work shop. Can you go grab that while I clear the table a bit more." Belle's worktable still had a bunch of scrape on it as Kitsunami only cleared off what was needed to set Surge down.
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"Yes ma'am," Kitsunami said before dashing off to the main work shop. It didn't take long to hear the fennec tearing the place up and in a manner of seconds he was back. "Found it, please hurry." He would hold it up right in Belle's face.
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Oh sawdust, Belle was going to have some explaining to do tomorrow. "Alright, just, maybe sit down so I can focus." The tinkerer then watched Kitsunami swiftly take a seat in a stool. 'Okay, you can do this Belle. Just remember everything you've read so far.' The puppet then removed Surge's shirt and began to work on bandaging her up.
It took nearly an hour and about five rolls of gauze, thirteen sterilized pads, and two elastic bandage's though Belle finished and put Surge's shirt back up.
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'That's about all I can do. Gear and starters why would she fight a super badnik all on her own?' Belle thought as she put the fourth medical kit to the side and stood up. "Well, now all we can do is-"
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Suddenly Surge sat up which scared the gears out of Belle making her fall back into the chair she was sitting in. "Sawdust, you scared me Surge!"
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Surge glared at Belled, making the puppet quiet down real quick. "You. What do you do while I was knocked out?" The tenrec was quick to assume the tinkerer did something to her while she was passed out.
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"I-I didn't do anything. Kitsunami brought you here because he found you injured. I simply patched you up as best I can." Belle was now nervous Surge wouldn't believe her.
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"I-It's true ma'am," Kitsunami said, getting Surge's attention. "Y-You were just h-hurt badly. I panicked and d-didn't know what to d-do. I thought Belle w-was the most trustworthy."
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"I get it Drippy, relax." Surge now seemed to be her normal level of rude. "Don't expect me to thank ya. I didn't need your help," the speedster said as she hopped off the table.
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"Hold on, I don't think you should be moving right now." Belle didn't know if that would make things worse if Surge suddenly started walking around.
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"Shut up, I'll be fine. I'm going to bed." Surge would then walk off not caring what Belle thought in the slightest.
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'How does anyone work with her.' Belle still found it hard to believe Surge was a part of the Diamond Cutters. The tinkerer then looked down seeing Kitsunami walking in front of her.
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"T-Thank you. Please delete all the data you got from scanning Surge." Kitsunami was grateful for what Belle did, though wanted to make sure that data was gone.
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"I deleted it as soon as I finished scanning to see what was wrong with Surge. I am more than happy to let you check my files for proof." Belle had nothing to hide after all.
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"It's okay, I believe you." Kitsunami wasn't sure why, though he felt he could take Belle at their word. "H-Have a good nights sleep." The fennec then rushed off to catch up with Surge.
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"You as well Kitsunami." Belle then looked at the mess of her workshop along with remembering that Kitsunami most likely made a mess of the main workshop. "Guess I have some cleaning to do."
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randomfoggytiger · 1 year ago
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Updated! X-Files Mulder Trauma Responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Fawn?
I've seen various takes on Mulder's and Scully's trauma and stress responses; and I wanted to autopsy the issue carefully to reach a conclusion. We're focusing solely on Mulder here-- but! Scully will get her own post in future.
Kitsunegari Sums Up Mulder's Trauma Responses in One Scene
Mulder is too late to stop "Scully" from pulling the trigger against her temple, screaming in agony as she drops to the ground, "dead."
He then cycles through all of his First and Secondary Trauma Responses (will be discussed below):
Running up in horror, then plastering a smile in sickening denial--
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Mulder attempts to feel a pulse. There is none. Scully is dead.
His grief overwhelms him-- an aggravated and more violent (if shorter) version of his sorrow in Redux II-- scrabbling at her scalp and shoulders, silently screaming into her face, before turning away so as not to vomit.
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He mentally starts to drift;
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but denial-- denial, denial, denial-- holds sway as he pops his head back up, reenergized,
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vainly feeling for a pulse once again, eyes desperately and obsessively focused on his partner.
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There is no hope.
Mulder is now losing all control, probably gearing up to an epic meltdown of Biblical proportions-- heavy breathing, desperate eyes, nothing to grasp at or solve or hold onto--
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when he hears a noise. A reprieve. A focus. An enemy.
Furious, he snatches a gun and levels it at Linda Bowman, spitting in his fury
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...but doesn't fire.
And allows "Bowman" to talk him down.
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And further, when "Linda" fires, Mulder flinches, puts his gun up as he dissociates (looks down to his mid-left)-- freezes, if you will-- and doesn't fight back, expecting to die.
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This is Mulder's Trauma Responses in full: Freeze-Fight.
He will also begin to repeat this cycle in Milagro (if shorter-- because Scully pops up, alive, sooner.)
Why Mulder Is Primarily a Freeze Type
I'm going to include this entire segment from Pete Walker's Complex CPTSD: From Surviving to Thriving (see notes at the bottom for more info) because it's such a powerful piece of Mulder-psyche that it should stand on its own:
"A Freeze Response is triggered when a person, realizing resistance is futile, gives up, numbs out into dissociation, and/or collapses, as if accepting the inevitability of being hurt.... The Freeze Response, also known as the Camouflage Response, also triggers a survivor into hiding, isolating, and avoiding human contact.
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The Freeze Type can be so frozen in the retreat mode that is seems as if their "Starter" button is stuck in the "off" position.
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Off all the four Fs, Freeze Types seem to have the deepest and conscious belief that 'people' and 'danger' are synonymous.
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While all 4 F Types commonly suffer from social anxiety as well, Freeze Types typically take a great deal more refuge in solitude.
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Some Freeze Types completely give up on relating to others and become extremely isolated. Outside of fantasy, many also give up entirely on the possibility of love."
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These Types have learned from a young age that fighting back will only get you punished and that fleeing will only get you reprimanded; so, they collapse inwardly instead. Dissociation becomes the name of the game, coasting through life without being attached to it, accepting its blows and distracting themselves from reality with either fantasy or the pursuit of a fantastical idea they want to achieve.
Frank Spotnitz said it best when he reflected on Mulder's character growth and seeking 'The Truth': ""You can't get the truth. You can't. There's a larger truth, though: that you can't harness the forces of the cosmos, but you may find somebody else. You may find another human being. That may be kind of corny and all of that, but that's really it: Love is the only truth we can hope to know, as human beings. That's what Mulder and Scully found after nine years. And that's a lot."
But what about those moments when Mulder runs at danger, demanding answers and yelling down the sky?
**Edit: This is the section i had to refurbish based on proper research.**
Secondary Trauma Responses develop when circumstances are so extreme that a person's initial trauma response is not removing them from danger fast enough; and they then develop a second polar opposite response in the hopes that this will help. More often than not, it simply becomes a ping-pong whiplash between one extreme to the other. The four Hybrids are Fight-Fawn, Fight-Freeze, and Flight-Freeze. In Mulder's case, if he stays frozen for too long he will very quickly become very dead; thus, Mulder developed a secondary response: Flight.
Freeze-Flight (or Flight-Freeze-- potato, potatoh) Types
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Below is an excerpt from Pete Walker, but it's so completely Mulder that I have nothing else to add:
"The Flight-Freeze Type is the least relational, most schizoid hybrid. He prefers the safety of "do it yourself" isolationism. The Fight-Fleeze Type avoids potential relationship traumatization with an obsessive-compulsive dissociative two-step. Step One is working to complete exhaustion. Step Two is collapsing into extreme vegging out and waiting until his energy reaccumulates enough to relaunch into Step One. The price for this time of no-longer-necessary safety is a severely narrowed existence."
(**Note for the below paragraph: the author is not talking about alpha/beta in the current, dilapidated vernacular. Think of it as an academic term describing more aggressive or assertive behavior as compared to more passive or dismissive behavior.)
"The Flight-Freeze cul-de-sac is more common among men, especially those traumatized for being vulnerable in childhood. This then drives them to seek safety in isolation, or "intimacy lite" relationships. Some non-alpha type male survivors combine their flight-freeze defenses to become stereotypical technology nerds. Telecommuting is, of course, their preferred modes.
Flight-Freeze Types are the computer addicts who focus on work long periods of time and then drift off dissociatively into computer games, substance abuse, or sleep binging. FF Types are prone to becoming porn addicts: when in Flight mode, they obsessively surf the net for phantom partners and engage in compulsive masturbation. When in Freeze mode, they drift off into Right-Brain sexual fantasy world if pornography is unavailable. Moreover, if they are an intimacy-light relationship, they typically engage more in with their idealized fantasy partners than with their actual partner during real-time sexual interactions."
An interesting note: these types are often misdiagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, which explains why some fans theorize that an Oxford graduate-FBI field agent might be on the spectrum (Mulder isn't: it's a symptom of him coping very, VERY badly.)
Mulder's Freeze-Flight response kicked in sometime after his sister's abduction, since his primary Freeze response "prevented" him from saving her (even if he couldn't do anything to help.)
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Since then, Mulder has buried all trauma or deep emotion in the bowels of his work in the basement, printing them out as X-Files to brand his work as his life.
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For all of Mulder's talk about disliking others for dismissing something that cannot be explained, labeled, or categorized, when he can't do it himself, he goes berserk: first freezing, horrified, before he launches with righteous fury into his work, demanding answers and running himself ragged.
A potent demonstration of Mulder's yo-yo-ing Freeze-Flight Response is the Russian Roulette showdown in Pusher: Mulder more readily accepts his own death than Scully, terrified but determinedly compliant... until she becomes the next target of Modell's mind games.
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It's a pattern that has already been established since her abduction, and which repeats for her cancer (and every perilous moment after and in-between.)
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An important
There are countless examples where Mulder disconnects from reality in the face of great grief, ala his father's death, CSM and Diana Fowley's oily plan in One Son, and-- especially-- his mother's suicide.
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In all these instances, Mulder immediately ran into work mode, trying move the world by force and come up with an explanation-- any-- to make everything right. When he is forced to sit and deal with tragic loss, his Flight peters out, leading him back to square one: an unhealthy Freeze Response.
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Luckily for him, Scully is a stable, reliable support; and coaxes him into properly grieving by not sugarcoating the Truth, thereby helping him turn into healthier coping mechanisms (if he wants to use them-- he doesn't in Paper Hearts, but he does in Sein und Zeit. Baby steps.)
In short: Mulder is a Freeze-then-Flight man.
Why Mulder Isn't a Fight, Flight, or Fawn Type
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To make quick work of this, I'll rely mainly on Pete Walker quotes again and add my commentary after his statements:
"A Fight [Trauma] Response is triggered when a person suddenly responds aggressively to something threatening.... Fight Types are unconsciously driven by the belief that power and control can create safety, assuage abandonment, and secure love." Extreme Fight Types often become bullies or narcissists to their loved ones as well as their enemies if left unchecked. They are demanding, demeaning, and punishing, equating strength as exerted power over someone weaker. They usually grew up in homes where they had to fight back against physical abuse or protect others from it. This translates to a bitter outlook on the world, always suspicioning the motives of others in cruel or judgmental ways.
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(Note: Not much of the above is directly related to Bill Scully-- or Bill Mulder, even, see my previous post about him here-- but his natural bent is Fight above the other 3 F Types. Doesn't mean he's a bully or a narcissist; just that those would be his extremes.)
As we have seen through the entire series, Mulder as an atypical American masculine archetype: he does not resort to violence, preferring to save victims and even villains, willing to give everyone a second chance (and, by extension, giving backstabbers a clear target for their next strike.) The only time he has exerted violence over another was as a last possible extreme to stop a threat (shooting Modell, shooting the Peacock brothers, shooting Schnauz, shooting Roche, etc.)
Back to Walker:
"A Flight Response is triggered when a person responds to a perceived threat by fleeing; or, symbolically, by launching into hyperactivity. .... Extreme Flight Types are like machines with a switch stuck in the 'on' position. They are obsessively and compulsively driven by the unconscious belief that perfection will make them safe and loveable. They rush to achieve. They rush as much in thought in action, compulsion."
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I will be talking about this response a little bit more in a follow-up post; but the core with this character is their ability to distract themselves from their problems into oblivion. Mulder's pains and sorrows and traumas are a constant of his life, eating away at his heart and shoving themselves in his face every day. The difference between his obsessive work ethic and a Flight Type's work ethic is the motivator: he is dabbling in his fantasy, building empires from ideas and discovering new kingdoms with every possibility; while Flight Types have ceased to function at all, robotically going from task to task until they overload or shut down.
And, lastly, back to Walker for the Fawn Trauma Response:
"Fawn Response is triggered when a person responds to threat by trying to be pleasing or helpful in order to appease and forestall an attacker.... Fawn types seek safety by merging with the wishes, needs, and demands of others. They act as if they believe that the price of admission to any relationship is the forfeiture of all their needs, rights, preferences, and boundaries. The disenfranchisement of the Fawn Type begins in childhood... learns early that a modicum of safety and attachment can be gained by becoming the helpful and compliant servant of... exploitive parents." (As an aside, this Type is also formed from having at least one narcissistic parent.)
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While Mulder is often used by those around him, he never loses the core of who he is to their abuse: when Phoebe comes knocking, he may set aside the case to (try to) get some hotel action; but he's still self-aware of his and her actions, disentangled enough to self-deprecatingly (and knowingly) smirk when he catches her red-handed with another man. When his father or mother weave in and out of his life with their soft or outspoken demands, he doesn't bend from the Truth, risking his relationships continually for It. He is willing to tell Scully to her face she is lying to him; and he is willing to sacrifice what new closeness they've achieved if he believes she's being purposefully blind or obtuse. Mulder, while reliant on Scully as his human credential, is not co-dependent on her: he can stand on his own two feet, even if she were to walk out of his life. The wounds would go deep; but he would dissociate from life (like he had in Little Green Men) not erode away completely.
(As an aside, that's why probably why Mulder would have committed suicide in Gethsemane but not during the Break Up Years TM. Post IWTB Scully, while she had walked away from their life together, was still a part of his reality; whereas, S4 Scully would have been dead, deceased, gone from existence... and Mulder could never escape that, no matter how much he dissociated from it.)
How Mulder Can Use His Freeze Response Healthy
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In a nutshell, a person should work through their traumas so they can pick among the 4 Trauma Responses for the healthiest outcome in each situation: Fight for healthy boundaries, Flight for healthy retreat and perseverance, Freeze for healthy awareness and distanced assessment, and Fawn for healthy assertive listening and peacemaking. Unhealthy childhoods create fixations on one of these four; and it takes a while to learn the patterns and triggers in one's life and how to manage them.
For Mulder, he grew exponentially through the years, becoming less detached and more engaged with "life on this planet" (growing from a sarcastic S1 recluse to a more emotionally honest person in S2 to a more openly supportive person in S3 to a transformed heart-on-his-sleeve man in S4-5 to someone who can find joy in S6 and peace in S7 and recreation in S8. Is there canon after that?) So, as it stands, he's doing just fine. Because if one truly searches for the Truth it might not be aliens: it might just be a whole, happy life and how to enjoy it.
And there you have it, folks!
Scully will get her own follow up, soonish (though if you don't want to wait that long, she's a pretty obvious *spoiler* Flight Type. No one's really surprised because of what happened in Fight the Future.)
Thanks for reading~
Enjoy!
*Note*: There are four main trauma Responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn (taken from the book Complex CPTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker-- see Disclaimers section below for info.) In short: Fight Types responds to stress by physical intimidation or verbal bullying; Flight Types run as far as they can from danger or distract themselves from it as much as possible; Freeze Types disassociate, seeing fight and flight as futile and becoming numb to life; Fawn Types try to win favor from their oppressor, leaning co-dependently on others.
**Note**: Most of the information was obtained from Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker, a private counselor and lecturer for thirty-five years. As a victim of CPTSD himself, he made a study of its victims and helped craft a system for CPTSD recoverees to understand themselves and progressively heal. (Highly recommend his book-- excellent.)
***Note***: I will ghost edit later. Brb.
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ccaptain · 2 months ago
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KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER.
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REPOST DO NOT REBLOG !!
NAME: sam!! yes with the !!. imperative (i'm joking) but I also respond to Zack!
PRONOUNS: she/her, they/them!
PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION: until I'm comfy giving you my discord IMs will have to do!
NAME OF MUSE(s): Kaeya Alberich. in fact, multiple Kaeya Alberichs. In his Fatuiverse, he named himself Ambroise Petrov. ...... I have a lot of verses ok-
BEST EXPERIENCE: OH, MAKING HIM A FUCKING. HSR VERSE. so many more interactions and people interested in my essential appropriation in the Enigmata path and lore..... sorry hoyov.erse. this is mine now. i'm making him friends and ships and i move the lore now
RP PET PEEVES / DEALBREAKERS:
- Do people still read an heartfelt, emotional reply from their partners and don't come yelling in their DMs about it as soon as they can?? That's the highest thing that puts me off on my list of Things That Put Sam off and you won't get the same effort off me if this happens consistently! sorry.
- everyone but me has square icons...................... where is the rotund. where is the round. PLEASE @ MY FELLOW ROTUND ICONS COME TO ME I'M AFRAID (I love y'alls icons im jk)
- If you start acting weird/spiteful because you assume my actions are sending a message you don't vibe with, your best bet is coming to ask me directly what I was trying to do/say. Me reblogging an ask meme/headcanon I made multiple times during the day is not to desperately attract your attention and coercing YOU specifically into sending me one: most of my rp partners have wonky timezomes but still want to read what I wrote/try to interact and this is faster than sending links to 8+ people. If you don't plot with me/send me ask memes, then there'll always be next time. Don't overthink it and don't make it weird, I exist in my own space and do my own things and I'll be happy if you want to vibe with me.
MUSE PREFERENCES: muses who have been damaged emotionally and still come on top of it ''well'' while hiding some sort of traumas...... muses with masks, multiple layers. onion muses that get vulnerable and get peeled layer by layer, painfully raw by the end of it. muses with skewered morals who learn with surprise that they can think in other ways than the ones they've been taught. in fact, H:SR Kaeya is an amalgamate of everything I like in terms of muse's personalities smashed together
PLOTS OR MEMES:  MEMES. faster to plot on, versatile, takes the awkwardess of the first plot off entirely if we're trying to interact, and I can adapt them to almost anything. I wanna say both, but plots are harder to start due to busy lives expecially if those require a starter :( i wanna say that we can mix both... start a plot with an ask meme that turns into a thread. that I can do and is a very good compromise for me
LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: 4 paras for each reply or assume I have been alien-napped by weird beings and switched with an impostor who wasn't left a script to follow to impersonate me.
BEST TIME TO WRITE: EVENING... if i'm not drawing or chatting with people or playing, I crack my fingers after my afternoon nap and kick in gear. lock in. ..... then I get distracted but that's another story
ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S): HOOO BOY I HOPE THE FUCK NOT. maybe i'm more like Wriothesley in terms of muses despite his blog collecting dust: I cope healthily and am normal? I think??
tagged by: i stole it from myself. ultimate thief level tagging: HMMMHMMHMHM who hasn't done this already... mmmmm @predvestnik and @dupliciti as usual but also @aguilareye @glacialswordsman and everyone else who would like to join in!
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