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honeybadgerwritings · 2 years

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Let Me Teach You

Pairing: Peter Ballard x Fem!Reader

Requested: 001 (henry creel) 34, 35, in comfort, and 37 in smut I feel like those sentences could make a really hot hurt and comfort smut 🥵 pretty please with extra cherries and sprinkles on top 🥺

Prompts: “Shh, just look at me baby.”

“I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.”

“Let me teach you.”

Warnings: Smut, Overstimulation, hint of Voyeurism, first time,

Summary: Super long PWP with you and Peter 😘

A/N: I usually refer to 001 as Peter instead of Henry, so that’s what I’ll be doing in this fic. Hope that’s okay! It’s mentioned in this fic that reader is an adult. I’m writing this with the mindset that she’s around 20/21. Thank you for reading! Also not proof read!

18+ Content So Minors DNI

~~~~~~~~~

Sometimes you think back to the lack of freedom and education that you were given in Hawkins Lab and it makes you shudder. It really was a nightmare. You were never allowed to shower alone, you couldn’t make any noise once you’d entered your room, you couldn’t go anywhere without the orderlies watching your every move, and nobody ever taught you anything that didn’t have to do with your powers. They would only throw you in the rainbow room filled with a bunch of different puzzles and children’s books for three hours a day, thinking that was all you ever needed.

And for a while it was. For the first many years of your life you were entertained by these things as most children were. But the older you became, the more tiresome you grew of them. You wanted to learn something else. Something more. Something new.

That’s why you befriended Peter so quickly. Being a fully grown adult and knowing nothing more than the words you’ve read in children’s books was frustrating to you, and he could see that. He would always enjoy teaching you new things, new words, and new experiences if it meant he got to see your face light up each time. It was easy to feel lonely at the lab, which is why you two found solace in each other.

After a few months, your friendship began to grow into more, and while you didn’t understand the concept of a “boyfriend” or a “relationship,” Peter was more than happy to enlighten you. But this time instead of explaining, he showed you. Sneaking into your room after lights out to talk for hours, spending more time with you than anyone else in the rainbow room, quick kisses and lingering touches when no one was paying attention. It was something new, and it made you happy.

You shake your head at the memory, eyes focusing back in on the 002 tattoo that you had on your arm. You realized that you had gotten lost in thought thinking about the lab. The two of you had escaped six months ago after you had been caught together and they tried to separate you.

After that, Peter had told you everything about his past and his powers and you were stunned to say the least, but you didn’t love him any less.

And now? The two of you were hiding out in a cabin somewhere in Maine. Peter had found a full time job working at the bakery across town, and you found a part time one at the library just down the road. You loved it. You loved being able to spend your entire day reading books and learning new things. It helped that your schedules were pretty similar.

On the days that the two of you both worked you could take the bus together, but after work you would have to walk home. You got done with work an hour after Peter did, so while he got to take the bus back home, it would unfortunately stop running before you were clocked out. You didn’t mind though, the walk was peaceful. At least, when it wasn’t winter.

Right now though you were at the front door, where your hand had been sitting on the knob for the last 5 minutes, right where your eye caught the tattoo. You sighed, shaking your head again before pushing the door open. You had expected to see Peter in the kitchen cooking dinner like he usually was when you arrived home, but he wasn’t there. Infact, he was nowhere in sight.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you heard noises coming from down the hall towards your bedroom. As you got closer you could tell that the noises were coming from Peter, he was calling out your name and he sounded in pain. You immediately worried that they had found you. The lab. And now they were in there hurting Peter. You began to panic at the thought of him laying there helplessly calling out to you. You quickly and quietly made your way to the door, pushing it open just a crack to see inside.

Peter was lying on the bed, panting and moaning. You frowned in confusion, only able to see him from the waist up. You peeked your head in just a little bit more, and you had to hold in a gasp at what you saw.

Peter had his hand wrapped around his length, and he was stroking it. His head was tipped back and his eyes were closed as he moaned your name over and over. Sweat was dripping down his temples as he moaned again,

“Fuck Y/N, you make me feel so good baby.”

You bit your lip as you realized, he was making himself feel good while thinking of you. A weird sensation formed in your lower stomach as you slowly backed away from the door, making your way back down the hallway. You opened the front door quietly, making sure he wouldn’t hear, before shutting it behind you and sitting down on the porch bench. You wanted to give him privacy, you didn’t want to let him know that you had seen him.

But you couldn’t help the blush that rose to your cheeks when you thought about what you had seen.

The way your name left his lips sounded almost angelic as he desperately bucked his hips up into his hand. The memory alone was enough to make you drool, and you rubbed your thighs together to try to ease the tension in between your legs. You had read about this somewhere, in one of the library books. It was a random one that you had picked off the shelf that seemed to be popular with some of the older moms in town. There were a lot of surprising scenes written in that book, including one that was very similar to what you had just witnessed Peter doing.

Your thoughts were abruptly interrupted as the front door swung open and Peter stepped out, looking around at first with a slightly worried look in his eyes before they eventually settled on you.

“There you are, I was starting to get worried.”

Your eyes scanned over his body, the one that had just been completely naked just moments ago, and you started to imagine that it had been you stroking him, making him feel good.

A hand waved in front of your face as you were dragged back to reality.

“Sweetheart? Are you with me?” He asked, worried. You gulped and nodded in response, standing up abruptly and stumbling. He put his arms on your shoulders to steady you, and all of a sudden you were imagining them elsewhere. You imagined him squeezing your breasts as his lips made their way down the side of your neck, desperate moans leaving your lips as you clung to him.

You snapped out of it to find him staring at you.

“I-I’m sorry... what did you say?” You stutter. He raised an eyebrow at you before pressing his hand to your forehead, checking your temperature. “I asked if you’re feeling alright...cause it sure doesn’t seem like it.” He flips his hand over, gently dragging the back of it down to rest on your reddened cheek. “I don’t think you have a temperature, but your face is still very warm.” His eyebrows furrow in confusion as he tries to determine what’s the matter with you.

“I’m okay really, I’m just...tired. From walking...you know?”

He nods slowly not really seeming convinced, but you don’t give him enough time to question you as you quickly pushed past him, rushing inside and leaving him out on the porch. He stands out there for a moment, pondering, before eventually shrugging and stepping inside, closing the door behind him.

~~~~

It’s been a couple of hours since your interaction with Peter on the porch, and you haven’t been able to make eye contact with him since. You had spent most of your time in the bedroom continuing to daydream and fantasize about Peter while trying to keep the feeling in your lower stomach at bay.

Now you were sitting at the dinner table with him, attempting to enjoy the nice dinner that he had made for the both of you. But it was hard to even think about food let alone eat it when he was just sitting so close to you. A lot closer than he normally did.

“Is something wrong with the food baby?” You heard him ask. You shake your head, taking a bite to prove your answer. You continue to eat in silence for a few more moments which is not normal for the two of you, and you both know it.

“Y/N.” You hum in response, not looking up at him. “Y/N.” He repeats, placing his hand on your shoulder, squeezing lightly. You tense up at that, your thighs pressing together once again. “Y-yes Peter?” you stutter out.

You can feel his eyes studying your form for a few moments. “I find it strange that you haven’t so much as looked at me since you got home.” He speaks lowly, hand tugging your plate of food away. You gulp nervously, and think that maybe you could ignore him for a minute longer, but he slides his fingers beneath your chin, pressing upwards until you look at him. You watch as his eyes scan over your features like he’s searching for something, speaking just moments later, “Why don’t you tell me what’s going on with you hm?”

Shaking your head, you try to look down but his fingers are ever present and you crack under his gaze, "I just- god, Peter, I’m so embarrassed-” his brows started furrowing, so you find yourself rushing the rest, "-and I don't want you to think I'm weird or anything but when I came home I saw what you were doing in the bedroom and now it feels like somethings wrong with me because I think I enjoyed watching you and- and I don’t know why I feel like this but I can’t get it to go away I’m just- I’m sorry I-” you rambled, breath picking up slightly and tears coming to your eyes in embarrassment as you tried to explain yourself.

Peter lowers his way out of his chair, crouching down in front of you to hold your face in his hands. “No...no no no sweetheart don’t cry please. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about.” You look at him with big doe eyes, sniffling.

“It’s not?”

He shakes his head, a pitiful smile gracing his face, “Not at all. It’s actually kind of...adorable.” He tucks a hair behind your ear, his touch causing you to shudder. This doesn’t go unnoticed by Peter and a lustful glint forms in his eyes. He trails his hand from your ear down the side of your neck, to your arm, before eventually placing it on your thigh, squeezing it lightly. Heat rises to your cheeks as you squirm beneath his touch, thighs rubbing together. He watches your reactions closely, a smirk forming on his lip as he watches you bite yours.

“P-Peter...” You stutter out, your breath hitching in your throat.

“I can help you sweetheart... I can help you feel better.” His eyes never leave yours as his thumb makes his way towards your inner thigh, gently stroking, “Is that what you want?”

You nod slowly, “I-It is but... I don’t know how to-”

“Let me teach you.” He cuts you off, his other hand stroking your cheek, “Let me teach you something new hm? I know you like it when I teach you things.”

A quiet, desperate whimper leaves your lips at his words and your legs begin to tremble underneath his touch. You take a deep breathe before answering with a nod,

“Yes please.”

Peter smiles, standing up and offering his hand to you. You instantly take it, following him to the bedroom. He closes the door behind the two of you and spins around to find you standing in the middle of the room, eyes to the floor and twiddling your thumbs nervously. Peter chuckles at the sight of you, and you look up at him innocently.

“Why don’t you lie back on the bed for me sweetheart?” Peter asks sweetly. You nod, doing as he says. Once you’re situated he climbs on top of you, his lips immediately findings yours. This you were used to. You could spend all day kissing Peter with your hands tangled in his hair and you’d have absolutely no complaints. But then he started moving out of comfortable territory. His lips made their way from yours, down your jawline and eventually to your neck, where he began to gently suck and nibble at your skin.

You were tense at first, unsure of what to do, where to put your hands, how you should react. You were so...nervous. Peter glanced up at you, taking this in. He gently grabbed your wrists, maneuvering them so they were wrapped around him and resting on his back. His head dipped down against your cheek, placing a chaste kiss there before murmuring, “Don’t think so much, just let your body take control.”

His lips find their way to your neck once again, and you began to relax, tilting your head back to give him more access. Your hands roamed his back as breathless pants and whines left your lips while he marked you. You could tell that he relished in the pretty little noises that you were making, as gentle moans made their way from his mouth to the flushed skin of your neck. It wasn’t long before red and purple hickeys decorated your skin and Peter pulled back, admiring his work.

“What a pretty sight you are.”

You blushed heavily once again at his words before you pulled him back down to you, your lips meeting his once again. His hands began to roam your body, making their way from your face, down your chest, eventually resting on your hips.

“Is it okay if I start to remove your clothes darling?” He asks you gently. You bite your lip nervously, unsure if you were ready for that. “I don’t want to do anything that you’re uncomfortable with.” He adds, giving you a reassuring smile as he places a comforting kiss to your temple. You ponder for another moment before a burst of courage surges through you and you nod.

He tuts his tongue in response, reaching up to stroke your cheek. “How about we use our words hm?” He states, a stern tone added to his voice. You take a breath before responding with a very meek, “Yes Peter.”

He smiles, satisfied, before leaning in to kiss you again, murmuring a small “Good girl” against your lips. He slowly guided the hem of your shirt up and over your head, leaving you in your jeans and your t-shirt bra. His mouth practically watered at the sight of your breasts.

You whimper pathetically in response to his gaze, and he gently reaches around you to unclasp the hooks of your bra, pulling it from your body. He stares down at your breasts in awe, reaching up to fondle them in his hands as you bite back a moan.

“God you’re so fucking perfect.” He murmurs, leaning down and taking your right nipple into his mouth, gently sucking as his tongue circles around it. He looks up at you while he fondles your other breast, watching you fall apart underneath him. You were writhing, your hands running through his hair as content little hums left your lips. He switches positions, giving your other breast some attention before he starts to make his way further down, from the valley between your breasts and down your stomach, eventually reaching the hem of your pants.

He delicately unbuttons them and wraps his fingers around the hem. He pauses for a moment to look up at you with smirk before he drags them down your thighs, taking your panties with them. A gasp of surprise leaves your lips, realizing you’re now completely bare in front of Peter. His eyes somehow manage to grow even more lustful as he stares at your drooling cunt.

“Is this all for me?” He asks leaning forward, his breath hot against your core as he swipes a finger up your slit. Your hips buck up and a strangled moan escapes your throat when he does so. “You poor thing, you’ve been this worked up for hours haven’t you?” His thumb gently circles your clit and you can only mewl in response, hips bucking again.

“I’m gonna make it all better baby. I’m gonna make you feel so good.”

That’s the last thing he says to you before he licks a long strip from your weeping hole all the way up to your clit, beginning to suckle on the sensitive little nub. You gasp sharply, thighs attempting to close around his head but pushes them back apart, holding them still.

You desperately try to cling onto something, anything; eventually settling for Peters hair. You tug on it, holding on for dear life as he eats you out. His bright blue eyes watch your reactions intently from between your legs as you completely fall apart. He’s locked onto the way that your eyes roll back into your head, moaning and panting his name repeatedly from those cute lips.

He begins to prod one finger at your hole, gently circling the tip around your soaked entrance. Your eyes widen in realization and you tense up immediately. Peter pauses, pulling his finger away slightly, gauging your reaction.

“I’m just going to stretch you out a bit okay sweetheart? Want to get you nice and warmed up to take my cock.” You blush at the way he worded it, and nod nervously. He slowly pressed his finger against your hole once again, “It’s going to be uncomfortable at first but I promise I’ll be gentle okay?” You nod once again and his eyebrows furrow, his grip on your one thigh tightening. “Words baby. Use your words.”

“Y-Yes Peter.”

He wastes no time before slowly pressing his finger inside of your tight hole. You squirm in discomfort at first while he pulls his finger out, only to slowly thrust back in.

“God you’re so fucking tight Y/N...you have no idea what you’re doing to me.”

You bite your lip to prevent the whine attempting to leave them. You feel him dip his head down once more as he begins to suck and swirl his tongue around your clit again, distracting you from the discomfort. After a few more moments of thrusting you began to enjoy the feeling of being stretched out around his finger. “M-more please Peter...I want more.” You beg, almost pathetically.

“Such a polite little thing you are. Of course my love, you’re taking me so well already.” He prods another finger at your hole, sliding it in very easily as he goes back to attacking your clit with his mouth. This time the stretch burns, but in a good way, and your hips buck up to meet his hand once again. You begin to feel an intense sensation building in your lower stomach as your moans start to grow louder and louder.

“O-oh god Peter, it feels so good I-I...”

He hums in response against your clit as he thrusts a third finger inside of you. Your hands grip his hair harshly, sweat drips down your face, and your muscles begin to tighten as the pressure in your core builds to a climax. The hand that had been holding your thighs apart slid up to your lower stomach and pressed down lightly.

And just like that you were too far gone.

Choked out moans and pants leave your pretty little lips as you come hard around his fingers, your drooling cunt pulsing around them.

“Shh, shh," he hushes you. “There you go baby, all over my fingers. Such a messy little thing you are...” He continues finger fucking you through your orgasm, his thumb circling your clit. Eventually though it’s too much, you’re too sensitive.

You squirm away from him, whining, and he shushes you as he gently removes his fingers from your poor sensitive little cunt. “Alright baby, alright. It’s okay.” He says to you, before licking your cum off of his fingers, relishing in the taste of you. He slowly climbs back up your body, hovering over the top of you as he slams his lips against yours. You begin to undo the buttons of his shirt, and you can feel how hard he is through his pants as he grinds down against your leg, causing you to gasp. He smirks down at you, gauging your reaction.

“You see what you do to me baby? You feel how fucking hard you make me?” You nod innocently, the thought of him being inside of you almost making you drool. He sits up, straddling you as he removes his shirt and begins to undo his buckle, before sliding his pants and then his boxers down his legs, until he too is completely naked.

You stare in awe as his cock bobs out of his boxers. It was throbbing red and the tip was glistening with precum, he was a decent size and it was so....so thick. You knew that the stretch would most certainly burn more that it did with his fingers. This time as you were staring at it, you actually began to drool and he chuckles at you. You watch him lean over to the bedside table, pulling out a little square packet, tearing it open and rolling the rubber content from inside over his cock. You didn’t know what it was, you didn’t care. You would ask about it later because the only thing you cared about right now was him.

He slowly crawls back on top of you, resting his forehead against yours. He makes sure you’re still fully into this by asking you, “Are you sure you want this sweetheart?” You nod eagerly, pulling him into a kiss as you feel him lining up his cock with your already ruined cunt.

He pulls his lips from yours and gauges your reactions as he slowly begins to push his cock inside of you, your walls attempting to adjust to him. You hiss in pain, tears pricking your eyes as you grip Peter tightly, nails digging into his back.

“P-Peter i-it hurts...”

He moans at how tight you are around him, but is more focused on your comfort than his own pleasure. “I know, baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe.”

He pushes his cock the rest of the way inside of you, just barely bottoming out as his balls rest against your ass cheeks. You groan and whimper in pain as you try to adjust to his size. Your cunt flutters and pulses around him, still sensitive and he groans. “God sweetheart, you’re so fucking tight around me. Taking me so well. You tell me when you want me to move okay baby?”

You gasp out in pain as he shifts just slightly inside of you and you nod, “Y-yes Peter.”

He leans down, pressing his lips to yours in an attempt to distract you from the pain. His lips feel soft and warm against yours, and they taste like the vanilla chapstick that he loves so much. His hands reach up to cup your face lovingly as you make out, and you smile into the kiss.

After a few more moments of kissing, you nod your head to him, signaling for him to start moving. And he does, very slowly. It definitely still hurts, enough to make the tears that were pricking at your eyes fall down your cheeks. A small pained cry leaves your lips as he thrusts again and again.

“Shh, just look at me baby,” He whispers, continuing to stroke your cheek, “You’re doing so good for me, taking me so fucking well. I don’t know what I did to deserve you but your perfect, you’re so fucking perfect. It’s like you were made for me. I love you so fucking much.” He rambles, pecking your face in between every sentence until you begin to giggle.

“I love you too Peter- ah!”

You were cut off by a moan as he thrusted deep inside of you once again, the pain beginning to dissipate, slowly being replaced with pleasure. A smirk forms on his face as he thrusts into the exact same spot, causing you to mewl in response.

“There we go darling....feels nice doesn’t it?” He asks you, “I’ve been waiting for so long to fuck you like this and ruin your pretty little cunt. I’d touch myself every day when I got home just imagining I was fucking you.”

Your eyes roll back again at his words and you moan, “O-oh god Peter...I feel so full.” He grunts into your ear as he reaches down, toying with your clit again, using his thumb to circle it as his thrusts begin to pick up the pace. Your hips desperately buck up to meet his and you can feel the pressure beginning to build again.

“God you’re so fucking tight baby, I’m so close, so fucking close.” He pants, leaning his forehead against yours. He starts rubbing your clit even faster and his thrusts start to become more sloppy. Your pussy starts to pulse around him again as you grow closer and closer to the edge.

“Peter I’m gonna- oh fuck I-”

“Cum for me baby, just relax and let go for me. Let yourself feel good.”

And you do. With one final thrust of his hips inside you your vision goes white and you’re taken over by pure bliss. Your head falls back and your back arches as you cum hard all over your boyfriends cock. Peter thrusts two to three more times before he releases as well, panting and moaning as his cock twitches inside of your poor abused little pussy.

He wishes he could fill you up with his cum and watch it leak out of you while your cunt is still sensitive and pulsing, but he knows you’re not ready for that yet. Instead he slowly pulls out of you, taking off the condom and throwing it in the trash. His eyes drift over your form proudly as you lay there exhausted and out of breath.

He leans down to admire the aftermath of your cunt, and moans as he watches it continue to twitch and pulse around nothing as your hole leaks onto the bedsheets. He smirks and decides to do something a little bit evil, and cleans you up with his tongue. He’s quick to hold your legs down as he licks all of your juices up. You immediately cry out, feeling extremely sensitive and try to buck your hips away from him, to no avail.

His tongue finds its way inside your hole, fucking in and out of you just as his cock was only two minutes prior. The feeling is so intense for you and you try to shove him off with your powers, but to no avail. He was already stronger than you, and you were just a weak little thing right now. He senses your attempt however, and looks up at you pouting.

“I was just trying to clean you up darling, but it seems I’m gonna have to teach you a lesson.” He smirks at you, before pinning your hands to the mattress with a flick of his head. He re-pins your thighs down with his hands and continues his attack on your poor little hole with his tongue, occasionally circling it around your sensitive and tortured clit just to make you squirm and whine.

“P-please Peter it’s so sensitive I-I....”

“Shhhh, just one more for me baby. You can do that can’t you? You can be a good girl and give me one more.” You nod, as best as you can, wanting to please Peter as he fucks you with his tongue. Your orgasm builds a lot quicker this time and he knows it.

Peter closes his eyes as he continues to eat you out, focusing all of his energy into your poor little pussy, wanting you to cum as hard as you possible could. Your eyes widened as the pleasure grew immensely and your legs began to tremble. By this point you were yelling Peter’s name in utter ecstasy, as he forced another orgasm out of you. The feeling was so intense that you cried your way through the orgasm, your whole body trembling.

You fade in and out of consciousness for a few minutes, your body trying to play catch up with everything that had just happened. When you finally came to, the sheets had been changed, you were completely dressed in your pajamas and your hair was wet. You felt... clean.

How long were you out for?

Peter steps into the room a moment later, a towel wrapped around his waist. He hadn’t noticed you had awoken when he dropped the towel, pulling on a clean pair of boxers before crawling into bed with you. Just as he does, you roll over to face him. He looks at you in total surprise.

“I thought you had fallen asleep for the night.”

“Yeah well I thought I’d fallen asleep for 2 minutes.” He chuckles at that, pulling you into his chest. “No baby, you’ve been out for the last hour. I cleaned you up and everything...guess I really did a number on you hm?” He looks down at you, stroking your cheek as it turned a bright pink.

You’re silent for a few seconds before you look up at him. “Peter?” You ask, and he responds with a hum of adoration. “Thank you,” you whisper, tracing imaginary shapes onto the bare skin of his chest, “For everything. I love you.”

He smiles at that, pulling you in to kiss your forehead, “You know I’d do anything for you sweet girl, I love you too.”

#fiction #henry creel #imagines #peter ballard #stranger things #001 stranger things #writers #smut #my prompts #dialogue prompts #requested #peter ballard x reader #peter ballard smut

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sluttyhusband · 2 years

Text

You Make Me Feel Special

Henry Cavill x Chubby!Male Reader

Title based off TWICE’s “Feel Special”

Requested by anon: Hiiii! Could you please write a fic where Henry Cavill and his husband M/n Cavill (😌) are going out, maybe for one of Henry's movie premiere. Henry's husband is a total sweet boi, so nice and shy and he kinda doesn't like to go out, not liking the cameras and attention N stuff. But surprise surprise, he's a total darling, so sweet with everyone, and just such a good person. Everyone kinda falls in love with him. The news is like "Who is M/n Cavill?" or "The man who stole Superman's heart", he just kinda became a celebrity. Throughout it all Henry protects his husband (and his privacy), always keeping an arm around him (😌), making sure he's okay, even when people approach him to take a picture, he keep his husband close. So, people start flirting with M/n openly, even in social media. They are just simping for the thicc shy boy. After trying to keep it together for some time, Henry finally breaks, he doesn't want to loose his baby boy. And he reminds M/n of that (😌) (can you include praise kink, breeding, and size kink?). Thanks for your time!

NOTE: This’ll also be like my 1K special fic cuz I still can’t believe I hit 1K, ugh thank you all so much 💙

Fluff & Smut: Henry literally being the best husband ever, Henry’s hairy pecs 👁

Lights flashing and people yelling, you weren't the biggest fan of doing this doing this, but it was bearable, only because Henry made it bearable. Also it would mark your announcement that you two were a couple, many times being caught with him and saying you were just a friend visiting... constantly… staying at his home... for many nights in a row.

"Henry!", a reporter yells out, "How's your friend M/N?", you ducked your head in shyness. "Well actually there's a bit of news, me and M/N are no longer friends. We're husbands. Have been for quite a while actually"

Henry's tone was that of no shame, only pure proudness, he was proud to be with you. And his tone while proud, was just a bit loud, catching the attention of the reporters nearby.

The two of you hand kept the rings hidden by keeping your hands and in your pockets, now with the cat out of the bag, Henry reveals his hand. The wedding band being the center of attention for photographers, that is until you show yours and Henry grabs your face and pulls you into a kiss.

☆*:.｡. oo .｡.:*☆

"HENRY CAVILL MARRIED IN SECRET TO WHAT WAS THOUGHT TO BE CLOSE FRIEND” tabloids, articles, and newspapers were plastered with yours and Henry's face. Bit more so your face than Henry’s, and all the questioning and wonder was also more focused on you.

Who were you? How did you meet Henry? Why are pictures of you and Henry being romantic not available?

Who knew

☆*:.｡. oo .｡.:*☆

Henry’s announcement caused quite a stir for a while. You two would walk down the street holding hands and people would come up to you, and you specifically. You’d learn to get used to it, being told you have sort of a more welcoming and nurturing vibe, that being why people were comfortable coming up to you, Henry being somewhat intimidating even when he didn’t want to be.

But that didn’t stop some guys going up to you, fully flirting with you with no shame. And you were a married man, of course you weren’t going to encourage their behavior, and neither was Henry. He got sick of it. Extremely quickly.

Specifically a few weeks after Henry had announced you two being married, he had been there the few times guys would get the courage to put the moves on you, and he laughed it off at first. But he grew annoyed. This guy fully boasting about himself, earning six figures a month, which you both knew wasn’t true. Henry’s final straw was the punk’s comment about your weight.

“Though if we got together you’d need to lose like”, and he looked you up and down, circled you, “yeah you’d need to lose like maybe five or ten pounds”.

Now you two were grateful that neither of you had received any backlash, specifically you because he knew you didn’t like to be in the spotlight all that much. But he just couldn’t take it anymore, everyone fawning over you, seeming to want to marry you as well! And this guy’s comment, it finally did it for him.

Without hesitation Henry swung at the man, his fist connecting to the man’s cheek. Knocking him to the ground and beginning to groan in pain, “Don’t ever talk about my husband like that you worthless piece of garbage”, Henry spat before dragging you to the car.

☆*:.｡. oo .｡.:*☆

Of course that little moment wasn’t ignored, pictures and videos were revealed of the event. People immediately coming to your defense, saying the man was completely in the wrong.

“How dare that nobody say M/N needs to lose weight?! He isn’t that good looking himself either”, “M/N is totally hot!! Like really hot, have y’all seen his ass?”

Comments similar to those were under posts, and even ones dirtier than the second one. And Henry couldn’t stand it, you are all that he has, someone he loves so much, maybe even too much. Would you think that Henry’s not enough after seeing how everyone craves you?

He couldn’t allow it.

He won’t allow it.

☆*:.｡. oo .｡.:*☆

Later that night, Henry laid in bed in thin grey sweatpants and shirtless, remembering your guy’s wedding night. The sounds you made, how you called his name, clenching around him, there was a need that night, a need that Henry wanted to bring out again.

You were in the shower, after the days events you wanted to relax. And so Henry purposely kept thinking about the wedding night. Knowing you’d walk into him sporting a tent.

And he was right, he remembered your face as he entered you that night, and that was enough to have him leaking. And you walking in at the perfect time.

“Well someone’s excited”, you chuckle as you dry your hair, walking out naked. “Knowing I married the sexiest guy imaginable can get a guy going y’know”, he smirks as a wet spot appears on his sweats, ‘damn precum already?’, he thought as he squeezed his 9-inch dick through the sweats.

”The sexy one here is you”, you say, climbing onto his lap, “You punching that guy earlier was so fucking sexy, the animalistic energy you had, the way your muscles flexed in your shirt, and just knowing you’d protect me almost made me cream my pants right then and there”.

You lean down for a kiss, Henry’s tongue slipping into your mouth, showing his dominance over you. He was so much bigger than you, towering over you since the day you met, he loved it. He loved leaning down to kiss you, a goodbye kiss after a date, a kiss under the shower, and when he leaned down to kiss you after saying your I do’s.

Now he’s here, tongue down your throat, his hands playing with your plump ass, your hands on his gloriously hairy pecs. Squeezing them in delight. “Why am I the only one naked here”, you ask, rubbing your own hard dick against his clothed one, “You’re right honey, it’s not fair is it?”

He gets up, grabbing something from the closet. A camera. “Just like our honeymoon”, he sets it down on the dresser, pointing towards the left side of the bed, Henry knew it would capture the best angles. Like him unleashing his rock hard dick.

He did it on the opposite side of the bed, so it would also capture your reaction, “You never fail to amaze me with your size babe”, you say before taking it in your mouth, fondling his balls in your hands, Henry throwing his head back in ecstasy and eyes rolling back.

He pulls out for a quick second before laying on his back on the bed once more, feeling your skillful mouth around his dick. “C’mon baby, lube it up”, he says while caressing your cheek. You continue to do so for a but before Henry feels himself about to cum. “Ok baby, that’s enough”, you give a slight pout, “Don’t worry, you’ll still get my cum, just not in your pretty mouth right now, now come on, face down, ass up”.

He gives you a peck, tasting himself before deciding to focus on your glorious ass. Taking the two mounds in his hands and spreading them to reveal your tight pucker. Henry begins to give kisses around it, feeling you slightly tremble at each peck, then he finally gets to your hole, he licks it before also giving it a kiss, savoring the feeling of your soft whimpers escaping your mouth.

He continues this process for a while until he decided to finger fuck you. His big thick fingers going in and out of you, causing more moans to escape your mouth. “We’re almost there baby, you’re doing so good for me, my good boy”, your dick twitches at the praise, drops of your precum spilling out onto the bed.

After Henry decides that the prep is enough, he rolls you onto your back, “I want to look at my gorgeous boy’s face as I pump him full of my seed”, you bite your lip and smile as he leans down to kiss you again.

While kissing you, Henry rubs his tip against your hole, his spit and his precum lubricating it to make for an easier entrance. He then slips it in, only a fee inches, causing you both to moan into the kiss, “My god you feel amazing M/N, so fucking amazing”, Henry leans down to your neck and starts leaving hickeys, knowing that you’d been seen with them and people would know you’re his.

“S-so fucking big”, you whine as he continues to put his dick inside you. The final thrust hitting your prostate causes you to moan loudly, “That’s it, make those gorgeous sounds for me baby”. Henry slowly begins thrusting his hips into you, grabbing your leg and placing it on his shoulder to brace himself before he starts to really get into it.

“You know what M/N, m’gonna fill you up so good, overflow your hole with my babies'“, you moan at the thought, “Yeah? You like that? Having my babies inside you”, you incoherently mumble in agreement as you begin to feel him gain speed. He leans down and whispers in your ear, “You’re mine M/N”, you grab onto his chest, teasing his nipples and grabbing his pecs, “O-nly nngh y-yours”.

“You gonna cum baby?”, you nod your head, “Me too, cum with me”. Henry grabs your dick and jerks you off the rhythm which he’s thrusting into you, he you pulsating, you tightly clenching around him, “3, 2, 1”, with that, you both scream out in pleasure, your cum shooting onto your body, and his shooting into your hole.

He pulls out and sees the cum on your body, he begins to lap it up, “Your body looks even more gorgeous when it’s covered in cum baby”, he stares into your eyes as he laps it up, working his up to your face. With your cum still in his mouth, you both kiss, you both enjoying your taste. He grabs you and places you on top of him, continuing to make out. After a while you both break the kiss, tiredness beginning to take you over. Before Henry forgets, he stops the camera, you two would watch it tomorrow. He joins you back in bed, you lay close to him, your head on his chest and his arms wrapped around you. He pulls a blanket on top of the both of you and places a kiss on too of your head.

“You’re the love of my life M/N”, he smiles snd turns off the lights, falling asleep holding you.

#Henry Cavill x Male Reader #Henry Cavill x Chubby Male Reader #male reader #x male reader #chubby male reader #x chubby male reader

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cha-melodius · 4 months

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Year in Review: Favorite Lines

Tagged by @kiwiana-writes and @firenati0n, and I didn't originally think I'd do this because it's so fucking hard, but I was bored out of my skull and didn't feel like writing, so here goes. I waited until after creators were revealed for the TMFU exchange to post this because one of my favorite lines this year came from that fic. I could not limit to three or five or whatever so you get how many you get lmao.

If you're wondering why there are no lines from Nova, Baby, it's because 1) there are far too many, and 2) the ones I'd like to quote are mostly super spoilery. Read the fic, I guess! 😂

RULES: feel free to share your top three/five/however many favorite snippet(s)/line/quotes/paragraphs from your published fics (or wips!).

From Playing Cat and Mouse with the Light (Napollya, E, 12k)

Illya’s thaw toward him had been slow, like a reticent spring that warms a frozen lake so gradually that you don’t realize the ice underneath your feet has thinned until the catastrophic crack that sends you plunging into the depths. That’s what this feels like. Shattering.

From Step Into My Office, Baby (Firstprince, E, 2.4k)

Alex winds his fingers into Henry’s collar and buries his face in his neck, and it’s all Henry can do to hang on like he’s clinging to a life preserver in a storm. Except somehow, Alex is both the life preserver and the storm.

From All Comes Crashing (Napollya, E, 5.6k)

“I hate this,” Napoleon says, his voice thick with emotion, “but I love you, so I guess I’ll take it.”

From This Hell of a Season (Firstprince, E, 21k)

If he were a writer, he would write a thousand poems and never come close to capturing it; as a painter, he’d spend hours—days, weeks—on the curve of jaw and never be satisfied; even the finest photographer would still struggle with the fact that a single image could never capture the vibrancy of him.

(also from the same fic)

No matter where they are—at home in their flat in Langley or standing outside a hut in the middle of a Mexican forest—all he really needs is this. Alex in his arms. The heat of Alex’s skin pressed to his. Alex’s heart, beating in time with his.

From Please Don't Let Me Be So Understood (Firstprince, E, 20k)

In. Out. Henry’s hands are warm and soft where they grip his. Alex doesn’t know if he realizes he’s swiping his thumb over the back of Alex’s hand. In. Out. Their faces shift, bringing the bridges of their noses together. In. Out. Henry’s warm breath washes over his skin and paradoxically makes goosebumps rise on his arms. In. Out. The air he’s breathing in feels thicker, honeyed, heavy like the atmosphere before a storm. In. Out. “Excellently done,” Dr. Chen says, and the words yank him back to reality like coming to the surface after swimming underwater.

From Falling Down the Stairs of Your Smile (Firstprince, M, 4.1k)

The press of Henry’s lips to his, the way their mouths slot together as easily as if they’ve been doing this for years, the zip of electricity that fizzles under his skin and spreads out to tingle in the tips of his fingers and toes… Alex has never been kissed like this, has never felt like this being kissed, and it’s exhilarating and terrifying all at once. Like he’s falling. Oh. Fuck.

From Black Moon (Napollya, E, 6k)

If this was supposed to be a release, it didn’t work—or rather it did, but only in the way that releasing steam from an over-pressurized system prevents imminent explosion. The pressure is still there, the need is still there, in some ways worse than it was before.

From Will You Brie Mine? (Firstprince, T, 5.8k)

The longer they kiss, the more he realizes that there’s something else that’s different about this kiss: it feels, unmistakably, like the last first kiss he’s ever going to have.

From Lessons in Foreign Diplomacy (Firstprince, E, 5.4k)

“I think,” Henry gets out tightly, “that you’re stubborn—” Alex bites down on the tender skin at the crease of his hip. “—opinionated—” A slow lick up the length of his shaft. “—arrogant—” A hot breath, ghosting over the crown. “—uncouth—” Alex curls his fingers, and Henry whimpers as his spine arches up off the bed. “—and if you don’t get inside me right now, I’m going to stonewall all of your treaty negotiations for the next month.”

From Something To Be Proud Of (Firstprince, M, 3.4k)

No one jumps out to call him out for being an impostor. Henry offers him a careful smile, then turns back to his work like he knows Alex needs a moment to himself. He lets his fingers rub over the surface of the pin, feeling the little enamel ridges, and something settles under his skin, like an itch he hadn’t even been aware of until it was gone.

From Always Where I Need To Be (Firstprince, T, 5.5k)

He thinks about how Henry is the last person he wants to talk to at night, and the first person he wants to see in the morning. He thinks about how making Henry laugh has become a significant reason that Alex does anything these days. He thinks about how he’d dropped everything to make sure Henry was all right, and how he’d do it again in an instant. He thinks about how he can’t really get enough of how Henry smells, the way the clean, grassiness that Alex always kind of assumed was part of his cologne had clung to him on a day when he hadn’t even gotten out of bed. He thinks about how perfect Henry had felt in his arms, and how he’d put up with a lifetime of his arm going numb every night if it meant Henry was sleeping next to him.

From Cold Light (Lokius, M, 3.7k)

“Tell me about your mother,” Mobius says. “If you want.” Loki smiles softly at him, and there, under the breathtaking northern lights, he tells a story.

#rwrb fic #napollya fic #fic year in review #rwrb #napollya #tmfu #firstprince #firstprince fic #favorite lines

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meraki-yao · 2 months

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Ahhh there are so many of your WIPs I’m interested in!! 😍😍

But the ones I’m most curious about are I know better (but you’re still around), The Little Prince, and the Sleeping Beauty/Soulmates AU. Can I get a bit more about those?? 🙏😘

Ahhh Thank you so much for the ask my dear!

I know better (but you’re still around)

Song Fic based on Taylor Swift's "Majorie", about grief and remembering family members that have passed

Something I really want to see in the movie sequel is Henry reconciling with his disconnected family members, so in this case, Philip and Catherine, and learn to deal with their grief together.

I've written a fic focusing on Catherine coming out of her grief before, but I kind of want to expand on it and include Philip, because he's in the deleted Thanksgiving scene so they clearly made up, but even in the books I found the sudden change of attitude of Philip kind of out of nowhere. Also, I feel like? Philip tends to be universally painted as an asshole in rwrb fics (well, still better than Queen Mary, at least sometimes he redeems himself) so I kind of wanted to make him more sympathetic and rationalize his actions a bit as an eldest child/sibling. (cuz the book makes it clear he's not actually homophobic, it's more about sticking to the status quo for him, and that I can understand)

The idea is that there's one-word change in the "And if I didn't know better" lines for each verse: "I'd think you were talking to me now", "listening to me now", and "singing to me now", I'm thinking of relating each word to each Fox child's memory of Arthur: so Arthur used to talk to Philip, listen to Bea play guitar, and sing to Henry. Something like that.

The Little Prince

I think I mentioned a little bit of this before? The campfire monologue is written in such a fairy tale style, like something from the Grimm brothers or Hans Anderson. And in the universe, Henry wrote that. I came up with the idea that to cope with his issues, Henry compartmentalizes what happens to him into fairy tale-style stories. I did something similar when I was young, which is why my diaries when I was a kid make no fucking sense lmao

So with this fic I'm doing the reverse: Taking apart the monologue and writing out the events implied in the monologue, so for example "the king gave the prince a suit to armor" = the king telling Henry not to come out on his 18th birthday

Sleeping Beauty/Soulmate AU

I watched 1950's Sleeping Beauty in January and came up with the headcanon that the movie takes place in a soulmate universe where soulmates meet each other in dreams, partly inspired by the Malec fic night vision with a similar setting with the addition of a count down timer until soulmates meet. I think that will explain how Aurora and Philip fell in love and knew each other was the one immediately, as well as the "I know you I walked with you once upon a dream" thing

So the basis follows the basis of the original movie: Henry and Alex are princes of neighbouring kingdoms who were betrothed at birth, but then Queen Mary as the Maleficent (Need to figure that one out) curses Henry and the whole "raise him in isolation thing" happens (Shaan in the position of the fairies)

But the divergence will be throughout their growing up they have dreams where they meet each other and develop feelings, which is the soulmate aspect of the fic

And then the rest of the story follows the basis of the original

The problem with this, and a couple of my other pre-existing movies AU is how much I'll keep and how much I'll change, and how to change the settings in a way that stays true to firstprince but still makes sense in the storyline. So like what the curse is, how isolated Henry will be, how will his prince identity be revealed, should I let Henry fall asleep like Aurora and let Alex do all the saving or something

Ask Me About My WIPs!

#rwrb #red white and royal blue #rwrb movie #taylor zakhar perez #alex claremont diaz #nicholas galitzine #henry fox mountchristen windsor #henry hanover stuart fox #firstprince #rwrb fic #rwrb fanfic #firstprince fic #firstprince fanfic #meraki fic #meraki writes #tag game #answered

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everwitch-magiks · 9 months

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Shameless

Henry has a lot of sex. A lot. He's young and in college and there is no shortage of men to fall in bed with. What better time to explore what he likes and what he fucking loves, as well as to catalogue how to make his many, many partners feel as good as possible? It’s all part of the learning experience. And Henry is a very dedicated student.

Alex has been inescapably aware of Henry ever since that one time they kissed. You don’t just stop being aware of the guy who basically caused your sexuality. So when Henry propositions Alex at a lame frat party, Alex accepts eagerly. Maybe this is exactly what he needs. Maybe, if he can just have Henry once, he’ll have a better chance of finally getting over his embarrassing fixation with Henry. It's worth a try.

I wrote this fic just about two years ago, in 2021, and I still think about it frequently. I'd gotten this idea that I wanted to write one where Henry has a bit of a reputation. It came largely from the parts in the book that reference Henry's time at university: Henry says that was where he picked up 'skills' in the bedroom, and he also tells Alex about his 'assortment of guys' at Oxford. Fun, right?

I just kind of loved that whole idea; Henry exploring his sexuality, having all the sex he wants, and figuring out all the things he likes in the bedroom. And when I put Alex there with him - at the same college, interested in Henry, and perfectly aware of the fact that Henry has many, many sexual partners - I realised I had a lot of interesting questions to answer. Would Alex even consider the idea that Henry might be interested in him beyond sex? Would Henry think Alex had approached him for anything but sex? And even if they managed to get on the same page, how would things shake out if Alex felt that he wanted to take sex off the table for a while?

'Shameless' is a story almost exclusively about sex: it’s about having sex, about not having sex, about the trust it takes to say both yes and no, and about how incredibly sexy it is to be open and honest about what you want and why. I do so love to write intimate conversations about sex - there’s something to be said (ha) for when they put it all into words, you know? What they want. How much they want it. How utterly enthusiastically they consent.

I'm so glad my hobby is smut - it brings so much goddamn joy.

Below the cut, you'll find an excerpt from this fic that I'm still so proud of. Alex and Henry are at a point where they are not fucking, but that doesn’t mean they aren't thinking about fucking. Also, Alex is pretty curious about the other partners Henry has fucked - so they talk about it. A safe distance apart. Did somebody say sexual tension?

“Hey,” Henry tells him softly, tugging on Alex’s hand. “What’s up?”

Alex turns towards him, startled. They’re not even there yet. But Henry is watching him closely, his brows creased slightly. Like he knows. Like he cares.

“I just have a lot of thoughts,” Alex says, smiling weakly. “I’m fine. I promise.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Kind of,” Alex admits hesitantly. “Look. I don’t want to say goodnight just yet.”

“Okay,” Henry says easily. “Do you want to go somewhere else?”

“Yeah.” Alex takes a breath. “To mine. But not to… you know.”

“Okay,” Henry repeats. He frowns. “We can hang out in your room without having sex, Alex.”

“Yeah,” Alex agrees hurriedly. “I know, I know. It’s just, the words ‘do you want to come up’, they kind of imply things.”

“Sure.” Henry nods, like he understands better. “But I know you’re not implying anything. You just want to spend time with me. Right?”

“Yes,” Alex says. Except then he hesitates. “I mean, mostly.”

Henry is quiet for a moment. “Okay,” he says slowly. “Can I ask you to try to explain that?”

Goddamnit. Alex usually isn’t this useless at communicating what he’s feeling.

“I keep thinking about it,” he finally says, the words coming out in a rush. “Sex. With you. And I’d kind of like to talk about that? But that doesn’t feel fair, because I know you want to, and I don’t want to rub it in your face that I don’t, so like—”

“Hey,” Henry cuts in gently. “Alex, it’s okay. I think you’re being a little hard on yourself.”

“Maybe. I don’t know.” Alex sighs. “I just feel like I should make up my fucking mind.”

“Not necessarily,” Henry says. He smiles. “Can I take you up on the offer to hang out in your room? I feel like this is a longer conversation.”

They do go to Alex’s room. Alex digs out two cans of beer from his mini fridge, not because he wants to drink but because he needs something to do with his hands. He doesn’t even open his, just holds it between his palms and feels the cold metal against his skin. He’s not sure how he feels about Henry watching his movements carefully.

“Okay,” Henry says calmly, and Alex looks up at him in surprise. He’d kind of expected Henry to want Alex to explain himself more. “Look. You don’t need to justify to me, or to yourself, why you want the things you want. Okay? It’s okay to just feel what you feel, and it’s okay if some of those feelings contradict each other.”

Alex opens and closes his mouth. His mind spins. He hasn’t even told Henry how fucking frustrated he feels about wanting Henry but still not wanting to go there. At least not in so many words.

“And if you want to talk about sex, but still not have it, that’s okay.” Henry passes his own can of beer between his hands. He hasn’t opened it either. “Honestly, I’d be very interested in that.”

“You would?” Alex asks quickly. Henry is just full of surprises today. “Why?”

Henry smiles. It’s weirdly sheepish. “Look,” he says. “I’ve had a lot of sexual partners. I know you know this. And one of my hobbies is getting to the bottom of what people like and why. It’s kind of my thing.”

“Jesus,” Alex mutters. He takes a breath. “Just, for the record, that doesn’t make me want to sleep with you any less.”

“Noted,” Henry says, grinning. “That’s very mutual, by the way.”

A thrill runs down Alex’s spine. Yeah. He likes that. He’s very into how badly Henry wants him. Is that the feeling he’s chasing? Is that why he’s keeping Henry at arm’s length?

“So lets talk about sex,” Alex says quickly, before his thoughts can derail further. “I’m game.”

Henry looks at him for a moment. Then, very slowly, he cracks open his can of beer.

“Sure,” he says, like it’s that easy. “Sex. What about it?”

Alex bites his lower lip. That’s a fucking challenge, isn’t it? Henry is pushing him, just a little bit, and Alex likes it. God. He should start making a list.

“Well,” Alex says, thinking quickly. This shouldn’t be that hard. It usually isn’t. “We could talk about the time you fucked me, or what other things we might want to try. Or about the sex we’ve had with other people.”

“All good options,” Henry tells him. He drinks from his beer, keeping eye contact with Alex. “Would you want me to talk about the sex I’ve had with other people?”

“You would do that?” Alex asks him quickly. Too quickly. Too eagerly. “I mean, you don't need to explain any part of that to me. It's not like it bothers me."

“But maybe you’re curious,” Henry says with a knowing smile. “And you could ask me about it, if that’s the case.”

Alex swallows thickly. If this is still a challenge, then Alex is pretty sure he’s losing. Or, alternatively, he’s about to win big.

He is curious, is the thing. But he's figured it would be too rude to ask.

“Yeah,” he admits before he loses his nerve. “Yes. I am curious about that.”

“Well,” Henry says evenly. He thinks for a moment. “What was it that guy at the party said, something about me and half the football team...?” He meets Alex’s eyes steadily. “He’s actually not wrong.”

What. The fuck.

“Is half the football team gay?” Alex asks incredulously, before he can think to stop himself.

Henry shrugs and grins. “Some bi, some curious. I could make you a list.”

“No kidding.” Alex opens his can of beer but still doesn't drink. His heart is beating fast in his chest. “Did you really blow them all?”

“Most of them,” Henry admits. He’s still grinning. “I do like to give head. Although I should perhaps add that this wasn’t all in the same evening.”

“You didn’t do that to me,” Alex says, and then freezes. Shit. That can’t have been the right thing to say. “I mean, not that I minded. Not at all.”

Thankfully, Henry doesn’t look offended. “I just really wanted to fuck you,” he says, his tone earnest in a way that should not be as sexy as it is. "You asked me if I had a preference, remember? And I wasn’t sure if you’d be up for that, but I wanted to so badly, I figured I’d put it on the table and see what happened.”

“I’m glad you did,” Alex tells him honestly. His voice is actually fairly steady. “God, that night was so good. I’ve thought about it so many times.”

“Me too.” Henry’s gaze flickers down to Alex’s lips. “All the time, actually.”

Fuck. Alex wants him. Alex wants him so much.

“Well,” Henry says slowly, leaning back a little. He’s interrupting the moment, and it’s clearly on purpose. “What else did that idiot go on about… oh, right, the handcuffs.”

That makes Alex smile. “Look, you don’t need to confirm or deny every stupid rumour about you. Not that handcuffs are stupid, but you know. It’s okay if that’s not your thing.”

Henry’s eyes brighten with unmistakable interest. “They’re not my thing, exactly,” he tells Alex pleasantly. “I prefer ropes. They’re so much more versatile.”

Alex’s mouth turns very, very dry.

He remembers with vivid clarity the one time that Nora had tied him to her bedposts. He’s pretty sure that he hasn’t come that hard since then. Nora wasn’t crazy about it, so it didn’t happen again, but Alex has touched himself to the memory many times over. If Henry could do that to him—

“Which way do you like it?” Alex asks quickly. “Do you want to be tied down, or…?”

“I’m into both.” Henry is watching him closely. “And you?”

“I, uh.” Alex swallows. “I like having my hands tied. I like that a lot.”

“That would paint a lovely picture,” Henry tells him with a smile, and Alex has to close his eyes for a moment. Jesus fuck. “What is it that you like about it?”

Alex’s eyes fly open again. Is he supposed to have a succinct answer to that? Is he supposed to have words for that all-encompassing feeling?

“Is it that you’re giving up control?” Henry suggests curiosity. “Or do you still want to decide what’s about to happen?”

“No,” Alex admits after a moment's thought. “I mean, there are things I don’t want to happen, but I don’t want to pick and choose. I want to be taken care of.”

“Ah,” Henry says quietly. It takes him a couple of seconds to find actual words in response to that, and that’s a fucking first, isn’t it? “I’d be very into that, Alex. I’d be extremely into that.”

“Oh,” Alex breathes out. “Okay. Cool."

For a moment, they just look at each other. Something has shifted between them.

It would be so, so easy to just pull Henry close and take him to bed.

“Alex,” Henry says quietly, “I’m not going to have sex with you tonight.”

It’s really something, how Alex’s feelings of relief and disappointment mingle together. He should get a fucking therapist, shouldn’t he?

“Is it because I told you I want to wait?” Alex has to ask, his stomach knotting uncomfortably. If it’s not because of that, then…

“No,” Henry says plainly, and Alex’s heart sinks. “If you told me you want to, I'd trust you on that. No, I just didn’t think that’s where we were headed tonight, and you gave me a lot to think about just now. Sex and intimacy aren’t things I take lightly, contrary to popular belief."

“Oh,” Alex says. That makes sense, is the thing. It’s completely in line with everything Henry has shared with him. “Of course. And just so you know, I think I was equally relieved and frustrated when you said that just now.”

“That’s something to unpack, isn’t it?” Henry teases with a wry smile.

“I know,” Alex groans. “No need to rub it in."

"I think you’ll know when you're ready," Henry tells him softly. "Don't you?"

Alex looks at Henry for a moment, taking in the whole package of him—his kind smile and his clear blue eyes and his devastatingly attractive body. He's kind of impossible not to want.

"I fucking hope you're right," he mutters, and Henry grins and kisses his cheek.

Read 'Shameless' on AO3

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #firstprince #first prince #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #fanfiction #spotlight saturday #evie writes

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firstprince-history-huh · 11 months

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Fic Rec Friday

This week’s theme: Rec a fic that starts with the same letter as your username (or, if you like, a part of your username).

The rules: Tag a fic that starts with the same letter as your username and describe why it’s so good / how it has a hold on you. Then tag some people to see what everyone else is reading. Spread the love! Please tag @welcometololaland or tag #fic rec friday so she can compile the masterlist.

I was tagged by @welcometololaland & @irispurpurea ❤💕

So for this I'm going with the fics that begin with the same letter as my Tumblr username & also my ao3 username because I've got good ones based on both!

So here we go:

911 Lone Star:

Fire Meet Gasoline by @howtosingit

An amazing firefighter!Carlos AU in which he gets transferred to the 126. It is a fantastic fic & I love the character portrayals! Such a wonderful fic & I LOVE IT SO MUCH!

Forever Will Never Be Long Enough (With You) by falloutmars (not sure if they have a Tumblr)

It's a Tarlos honeymoon fic. Some teasing & swimming pool shenanigans which are simply so 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Find Another Dose by @paperstorm

A 1x09 missing moments fic. TK in his feral cat boy era. A heartbreaking, sad & such an AMAZING fic! Also, Gwyn in this! It made me miss her so much! This was one of those 'This makes me want to hug TK so much' fics. Or as someone else said in the comments, "He needs a Carlos-shaped hug''.

Delicate by @paperstorm

A 1x06 missing moments fic. It has smut with feelings (my favourite kind of smut). Both boys are obviously developing feelings but they're not going to talk about it. The fic was so achingly beautiful it wrecked me. The way Andie has mixed in the feels is 🥺🥺🥺❤❤❤

RWRB:

Forgiveness (Can You Imagine) by viciouslyqueer (I don't know if they have a Tumblr)

A FirstPrince talk of rings & proposals with a little bit of angst. I had so many feels about this! It's si lovely & beautiful & amazing!

Hashtag Soulmates by @everwitch-magiks

A copywriter!Henry & legal advisor!Alex AU. It has literally all my favourite fanfic tropes! And that one particular chapter which has a moment which is so meta I just love it! And all the references & easter eggs in that chapter!

For One Night Only by @indomitable-love

A Catherine/Arthur fic. The meet-cute 🤣🤣😂😂

All the talk of grief made me think of it as foreshadowing. All the parallels! George's story 🥺🥺🥺🥺

The name origin for Beatrice & then after reading the fic, I realized this was also a Henry name origin story! 🥹🥹🥹❤❤❤

For All The World To See by @everwitch-magiks

An FirstPrince neighbor AU with actor!Alex & author!Henry. The fic references! And all the secrets which eventually do come out & lead to the angst! And then the happy ending! 🥺🥺🥹🥹❤❤

Faster, Higher, Stronger by @everwitch-magiks

A FirstPrince sports AU where they're both ice-skaters. So amazing & brilliant & beautiful! I loved it so much! Also, this is the fic that lead me to take an interest in ice-skating. The number of YouTube videos I've watched of Nathan Chen flawlessly executing his routines because of this!

Forever Yrs, For Evermore by @indomitable-love

A FirstPrince lake house proposal fic. It's so beautiful & soft & sexy & lovely all at the same time! I think this is one of the first fics I remember reading for this fandom!

Not sure who hasn't done this yet, but no pressure tagging: @ladytessa74 @sarnagati @jordanshenessy @fangirl-paba @detective-giggles @paperstorm @goodways @first-kanaphan @actuallysara @actual-sleeping-beauty & anyone who wants to participate!

#fic rec friday #911 lone star #tarlos #911 lone star fic #rwrb #red white & royal blue #red white and royal blue #firstprince #rwrb fic #firstprince fic

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sequinsmile-x · 1 year

Text

Stained Glass Windows - Chapter Twenty Six

Life was complicated, but they wouldn't have it any other way.

-x-

Hi friends!!

As always, thank you so much for the love on this fic! This chapter is much softer than the last couple, giving our favs a well earned break from what I am putting them through in this story!

Please let me know what you think, your reactions genuinely mean the world to me!

-x-

Words: 3.2k

A full list of warnings for the fic can be found on the Series Master List and will be updated as we go along.

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

“I remember when our girl's days started with shopping and then ended in a bar, not the McDonalds in the mall’s food court,” Penelope says, smiling as she pops a fry into her mouth.

Emily chuckles, “It’s in the rules that the pregnant woman gets to choose where we eat.”

“That’s true,” JJ chimes in, having a sip of her soda, “I always got to pick when I was having Henry.”

“See,” Emily says turning back to Penelope, “If you want to pick you have to have a baby of your own.”

Penelope visibly shivers, shaking her head, “No thank you, I am more than happy being the cool Aunt to Henry and Nugget.”

Emily frowns, scrunching up her nose as she smiles at JJ before turning back to Penelope, “Why are you calling my baby ‘Nugget?’”

“Well since you refuse to find out what you are having I’ve had to improvise,” Penelope replies, nodding towards the box of McNuggets in Emily’s hand, “Plus chicken nuggets seem to have become one of your main food groups lately.”

Emily clears her throat, her cheeks red with embarrassment, “I’ve been craving them.”

“All I ever wanted to eat when I was pregnant was this one particular taco from Taco Bell,” JJ says sympathetically, smiling wryly, “Poor Will went out to get it for me so many times in the middle of the night.”

Emily laughs, “Aaron has half-filled our freezer with nuggets, Jack is always delighted when he comes over.” She knew that Aaron was, at best, a few weeks away from hiding vegetables in her food just like he did for his son.

“Did you get everything you needed, Em?” JJ asks, looking at the bags of clothes on the spare chair at their table.

Emily nods in response, “I got a new bra and a couple of pairs of pants,” she says, scrunching her nose up, “None of my actual clothes fit me properly anymore but I’m going to try to put off buying maternity clothes as long as I can.”

“Just think, before we know it we’ll be throwing your baby shower,” Penelope says, her excitement clear, and Emily chuckles wryly, “Which reminds me, I’ll need your mother’s number so I can contact her about that. I tried looking for it but it’s listed as classified.”

Not for the first time, she finds herself grateful for the way she was raised, the way she can hold herself together in moments like this. It had been just over a week since she had seen Elizabeth, and it still stung when she thought about it, about how everything had gone south so fast. She was grateful that her mother had, so far, stuck to what she had asked and not contacted her, but it also hurt. An unspoken confirmation from her that she had chosen alcohol over her daughter. Over her grandchild. Despite everything, she still didn’t want anyone else to know, her need to keep it private, even from the people she considered her extended family, overriding anything else.

She supposed, on some level, it was probably a good thing she’d never seen her mother that often anyway. It would make things less suspicious, but she’s sure questions would come further down the line when the baby arrived.

When she and Aaron decided to finally get married.

She twists her engagement ring around her finger and smiles at her friend, “That’s not really her kind of thing,” she says before reaching for her drink and taking a sip before she expertly, switches the conversation “I’m only 17 weeks Pen, let's not wish the time away. There's a lot to do before then,” she finishes her fries and sighs, the salty food taking the edge off of her rising panic for everything she and Aaron needed to organise before the baby was born, “Like finding a place to live.”

It was a discussion that she and Aaron had started having when they found out she was pregnant. She loved her apartment, it had been her home for longer than anywhere ever had been before, but she knew it wouldn’t be enough for their growing family. Whilst the baby would be sleeping with them for the first few months after they were born, she didn’t want to eventually force Jack to share a bedroom with his sibling when he was with them.

She wanted a house, a home. Somewhere her kids could grow up and run around together. Somewhere they could get covered in mud in the backyard. Everything she’d watched in the movies when she was young and convinced herself she’d never have herself. Aaron, despite having moved into her apartment less than a year ago, agreed, and part of her wondered why they hadn’t just bought a house then. If she was honest with herself, she knew it was because a part, a very small part, had still wanted some kind of control of the situation.

“Have you still not found something?” JJ asks, well aware of the difficulty, and stress, of finding somewhere to live when pregnant.

Emily groans, shaking her head as she places her hand on her stomach, her almost constant indigestion bubbling away, “No. Aaron is insistent on splitting everything down the middle which is insane,” she exclaims, blowing out a breath, “I have all of this money just sitting in my trust fund.”

They’d been disagreeing about it almost as long as they’d been talking about buying a house. She wanted to use her money, to buy them somewhere they could live forever, but Aaron was hesitant. She could never quite figure out if it was incredibly misplaced machoism that made him feel like he had to be the provider, or if he was just uncomfortable with the amount of money she had, or if it was both.

Either way, it was frustrating, and she knew this was something they would likely run into a lot over the years.

“And you have how much in that trust fund?” Penelope inquiries, making both Emily and JJ laugh, the question a regular one on every girl's night since she’d first confirmed their suspicions that she had a trust fund at all.

“Pen, if you can’t get that information out of me when I’m drunk, you have no chance when I’m sober.”

___

Emily sighs as she slumps back on the couch, rubbing her hands over her face as she takes a break from looking at real estate listings.

“It can’t be that bad,” Aaron says as he sits next to her, handing over the ice cream she’d requested after dinner. She sits up, making Sergio who had been curled up in her lap, his head on her bump, jump up, meowing as he walks away.

Emily grumbles as she takes the bowl from him, narrowing her eyes as she takes a bite, moaning at the taste of chocolate, “It is almost impossible to find a house that has everything we want within the budget we have.”

Aaron sighs at the mention of it, familiar dread that what had so far only been a disagreement between them could easily transform into a full-blown argument, “Em-”

“I have the money, Aaron,” she says, placing her bowl of ice cream down on the table in front of them, her appetite for it gone.

“It’s your money, sweetheart.”

She scoffs, shaking her head at him. “We’re having a kid. We’re going to get married. What happened to ‘what’s mine is yours?’”

“I don’t know if that applies to literal millions of dollars,” he replies, remembering how he’d had to sit down when she originally told him how much money she had, a fearful glint in her eyes that it would change the way he viewed her. He sighs and places his hand on her thigh, squeezing it gently, “It’s just…I spoke to Dave and-”

“You listened to Dave about this?” She asks incredulously, cutting over him, “He’s been divorced four times, I don’t think he’s exactly the person to go to for relationship advice.”

“Three times,” Aaron corrects, a wry smile on his face, “And he’s the only other rich person I know.”

“I’m richer than him,” she grumbles under her breath as she crosses her arms over her chest. She looks at him and sees the flicker of amusement in his lips, the way his eyebrow arches, and she clears her throat, “Right, not helping,” she sighs, “Why are you so hesitant to do this my way? Is it some macho bullshit that you need to be the provider? Because if it is-”

“No,” he replies, squeezing her leg again, “I promise you it’s not that.”

She stares at him for a moment, desperately trying to see if he’s lying to her, but she’s satisfied he isn’t and she places her hand over his on her leg, “Then what is it?”

He doesn’t want to upset her, to make things harder on her than they had been since what small part of the relationship she had left with her mother had collapsed around her, but she deserved the truth.

“I’ve been divorced once already, sweetheart,” he says carefully, hating himself as her eyes go slightly wider, “I need to be practical. If you buy us a house-”

“It will be our house,” she says, cutting over him, “Not mine. And if anything happened between us,” the thought of it alone makes her breath catch in her throat, “It would still be our house. We’ll have both of our names on the deeds. I wouldn’t just screw you over like that.”

“I know,” he assures her, squeezing her hand, shaking his head at himself, “Why is this so important to you?”

She sighs, “That money in my trust fund came from my parents, and their parents, and the jobs they chose that meant we were never really a family,” she blows out a shaky breath, the wound from the conversation with her mother the week before still fresh, “And I always told myself that if I got married and had kids I’d use it to buy my family a home, to make something good out of the very thing that made my childhood miserable,” she places her hand on her bump, “For a long time I convinced myself I’d never have this and that I’d end up donating it all to a charity that would make mother furious, like a cat sanctuary or something, but now I do have you and Jack and Nugget.”

“I can’t believe the Nugget thing is catching on,” Aaron says, and she smiles at him, her eyes soft and full of love. She’d told him about their friend's nickname for their unborn child the moment she got home, and the confused look on his face had made her laugh so much she’d started to jokingly use it herself.

“What can I say, Pen is persuasive,” she replies. She cups his neck, her thumb brushing over his jawline, “Please let me do this for us. If it makes you feel better you can pay all the bills when we do find somewhere, or we can keep this place and rent it out and that can go into an account for the kids, but…just let me do this.”

He looks at her, and he isn’t sure he’s ever seen her so raw, so torn open. Her honesty a gateway that let him see the parts of her she still hid even from him sometimes. He picks up one of the more expensive listings she’d been looking at, far outside o the budget they’d tentatively agreed on and looks it over.

“You like this one?” He asks, and she nods, her lower lip in between her teeth as if she was trying to keep her hope contained. It was a beautiful home, a large colonial-style house with a brick facade, the interior was largely open plan on the first floor, with large archways separating the rooms, letting natural light filter throughout the house. The bedrooms and bathrooms were all a decent size, especially the master bedroom and its adjoining ensuite, and there was plenty of space in the backyard for Jack, the baby, and any other kids they may have to run around.

He finds himself mostly drawn to the huge, immaculately decorated, kitchen and he can picture himself making pancakes on a Sunday morning in there for his family.

“It’s a beautiful house,” he says, smiling at her and raising his eyebrow, “5 bedrooms?”

She rolls her eyes at the suggestive tone in his voice, hearing exactly what he hadn’t said, and pats his chest, “Easy there tiger, at least let me have this kid before you start thinking about filling up the spare rooms.”

Aaron chuckles and pulls her in for a kiss, “Let’s go see it.”

The way her eyes light up tells him he’s made the right call, that putting aside any deep-rooted concerns and misplaced fear about letting her do this for them, for their family, is exactly what he should have done weeks ago when she first brought this up.

“Really?” She asks, her smile wide, any ability to hide her emotions well and truly lost in the first trimester of her pregnancy.

“Really,” he confirms, kissing her again, “I can see our family growing up there.”

She throws herself at him, wrapping her arms around him tightly as she kisses him, the action lost in her wide smile, “I love you so fucking much.”

He chuckles and wraps his arms around her, pulling her so she was straddling his waist, her knees on either side of his hips, “I love you too.”

“I’ll call the agent in the morning.”

He nods and pulls her in for another kiss, smiling at the feel of her bump pressed up against him. “We won’t be able to do this for much longer,” he says, moving to kiss her cheek and then her neck, “We won’t have room.”

She pulls back and smiles at him, and she runs her fingers through his hair, “In that case,” she says, leaning in to kiss him again, “We’d better make the most of it before we’re regulated to just the bed.”

___

Cases with children were always harder.

The desperation to solve the case, to find the bad guy who was doing the worst of things possible to the most innocent, more intense. She’d always felt great empathy for the parents in these situations, but now she could put herself somewhat in their shoes, her love for Jack, for the baby in her belly, enough to make her feel sick at the mere thought of something happening to them.

She watches Aaron from her desk, her focus on her paperwork limited at best as she keeps looking through the blinds in his office, desperate to go check on him. She knew he found cases like this harder too.

There were survivors this time, a little girl and a teenage boy reunited with their parents, the recovery from all that they had endured only just beginning, and that was something they could cling on to. Evidence that they all needed sometimes to remind themselves of why they did this. That didn’t make it any easier, and she knew they’d all remember the wails of one of the victim's fathers when he realised his son had been alive only one day ago.

She blows out a breath and looks back at her paperwork, determined to get a little more done before they headed home, when she is distracted once again, but this time it wasn’t out of concern for her fiancé.

It feels like tiny bubbles. Bursting against the inside of her belly, as if tiny butterflies were floating around, their wings delicate. She places her hand on her stomach and gasps, choking on a laugh.

“Are you ok, Em?” Derek asks and she turns to look at him, nodding as she laughs again.

“Yeah. I…I think I just felt the baby move for the first time,” she says, her hand still on the bump as she continues to feel the movement on the inside, “It feels weird.”

Derek smiles at her, his eyes soft as he nods towards Aaron’s office, “Go tell Hotch, we all need something good after today.”

She nods, not needing any other encouragement, and she stands, almost bounding up the stairs as she approaches his office. She knocks on his open door and waits for him to look up. He looks exhausted, the lines in his face deeper than usual, as if they’d been carved in.

“Do you have a minute?” She asks, and he smiles at her, already standing up from his desk.

“For you, always.”

It makes her smile, and she knows it’s one of the things he’s learnt from his past mistakes with Haley. He always made time for her, and in turn, she knew that was because she understood the job, the work that could sometimes consume them both. It was yet another way that, if she believed in fate, would make her think they were made for each other.

She takes a seat on the couch in his office and waits for him to sit next to her, his arm automatically around her shoulder. She knew they couldn’t be seen from the main bullpen here, only if someone was on the walkway, but she was sure no one would begrudge them this after the last few days.

“I just felt the baby move,” she says, her throat closing up as she says it outloud, her hormones getting the better of her as she fights back tears.

“What?” He asks, his voice full of wonder as he presses his hand into her bump, and it makes her laugh.

“It will be a while before you can feel anything from the outside honey,” she says, resting her head against his shoulder. She feels the movement again, and she smiles, placing her hand over his, “I wish you could feel it though it's amazing. And really fucking weird.”

Aaron laughs and kisses her temple, keeping his lips against her skin, “Nugget is the size of a pomegranate this week.”

She snickers at his use of the baby’s newfound nickname and pulls back to look at him, “I know, I’m reading the same book as you,” she says softly, “Spencer told me today that the baby weights as much as a mozzarella ball,” she crinkles her brow, her stomach rumbling at the thought of food, “Which, strangely, really made me want Italian food.”

Aaron kisses her, eternally grateful for her, for the life they were building, “Sweetheart, I’d go to Venice to get you pizza right now if you asked me.”

She chokes on a laugh, but it comes out as more of a sob, her happiness overwhelming in a way she didn’t know was possible. “That’s sweet, but I’m totally content with that place down the street from our apartment.”

“Whatever you want, Em,” he says, kissing her again, wiping a stray tear from her cheek, “Whatever you want.”

-x-

Tag list:

@ssa-sparks, @lukeclvez, @lyds102, @glockleveledatyourcrotch, @hotchnissenthusiast, @danadeservesadrink, @ssamorganhotchner, @emilyprentissisgod, @notagentprentiss, @freesiasandfics, @emilyshotchniss, @thecharmingart, @paulitalblond, @hancydrewfan, @camille093, @whitecrossgirl, @moonlight-2-6, @rawr-jess, @florenceremingtonthethird, @jareauswife, @ms-black-a, @beebeelank, @aubreyprc, @zipzapboingg, @psychopath-at-heart, @criminalmindsgonewrong, @fionaloover, @kinqslcys, @prentissinred, @ccmattis-22, @denvivale317, @thrindis, @hotchsguccitie, @cmfouatslota77, @alexblakegf, @aliensaurusex, @prentissxhotch, @emobabeyy, @victoiregranger, @stormyweatherth, @wanderingdreamer009, @ssablackbird, @luhwithah, @lex13cm, @prentiss-theorem, @dont-emily-me, @mrs-ssa-hotch, @jocyycreation, @itsmytimetoodream, @hotchnissgroupie, @controversialpooh, @capsshinyshield, @canuck-eh

Join my tag list here!

#hotchniss #hotchniss fanfiction #hotchniss fanfic #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #aaron hotchner fanfiction #emily prentiss fanfiction #hotchniss fan fic #aaron x emily #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner

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affectionatelyrs · 6 months

Text

Weekend WIP Game

My goodness I've been tagged so many times LET'S DO THIS Y'ALL

Thank you very much to @inexplicablymine @rockyroadkylers @gay-flyboys @happiness-of-the-pursuit @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @daisymae-12 and @kiwiana-writes for the tags I loved reading all of y'alls answers this is so much fun to see - thank you to @welcometololaland also for creating the game! :)

Rules: List your WIPs below (if you only write one fic at a time, feel free to include future WIPs/ideas!) then answer the following questions. Then, tag as many people as you have WIPs (or more).

WIP List (Bolded ones have an outline/words/some ideas, others are mostly just floating around in the dome for now) (none of these actually have legit titles kind of sort of whatever)

Walk and Talk (irl epistolary)

Soulmates (Music System)

3+1 companion fic to All of This Silence and Patience (prequel from Alex's POV)

Henry is a Painting

Phone-Sex Worker/Coffee Shop

5+1 love confession through non-verbal cues

S.M.U.T

Threesgiving

Secret Santa

Beach at Night

There is probably more but this is already getting long LOL

2. Which of your WIP’s is currently the longest?

I haven't "officially" started writing any because I tend to write one at a time and I just finished my halloween huh fic, but as of now it's either Walk and Talk or Soulmates - Walk and Talk has a ton of random scenes/snippets written and Soulmates has a 9 page (and still in progress) outline

3. Which WIP do you expect will end up the longest?

Soulmates or Henry is a Painting. They are both legitimate multichaps (my debut into them scary). I'm predicting that they will both be around 30-40K but I have a...tendancy...to go way over my predictions because I've like never been succinct in my life

4. Which WIP is your favorite to write/the most enjoyable to write? Why?

I've been having SO much fun with Walk and Talk - the idea is so special to me and it's just like pure fun and silliness and I think the formatting of it is very interesting too (this fic is my pride and joy if you can't tell yet)

5. Which WIP do you find the most intimidating to write? Why?

I think, as of now, Soulmates and Henry is a Painting. Soulmates is going to be my first real multichap so that in itself has me shaking in my boots nerves and excitement) - it also has a good amount of world building in it. I have the system figured out but now it's about how I'm going to incorporate it throughout the story. Henry is a Painting is also magical realism but it takes place in one setting and is essentialy a lot of conversations, so I'm a bit trapped in what I can do, but I think I can pull it off? I just have to put a lot of thought into it ha ha

6. Which WIP do you experience the most self-doubt about. Why?

Maybe Henry is a Painting? The idea is very special to me but because of what I said in #5 I have to ensure it doesn't get tiring. A lot of introspection and mental health discussion and important conversations are mixed in to this one, but it's also mysterious and fun

7. Which of your WIP’s will you seek out a beta/sensitivity reader for? Why?

All of them. Maybe even two. I will never not have any of my fics beta'd because I want to ensure that they're the best that they can be I have too much anxiety and need for praise to not have them

8. Have any of your WIP’s been struck by the curse of writers block?

Not really? If anything, I'm just very indecisive and it takes me a long time to figure out where I want to go with certain aspects of a fic. I try to make sure that I start on fics that I feel a lot of excitement for when I choose what I want to do next

9. Which WIP has your favorite OC? Tell us about them?

Threesgiving with @happiness-of-the-pursuit is the only one as of now. His name is Collin. That's basically all we've got ish for now

10. Which WIP is the sexiest?

Threesgiving and Phone-Sex Worker/Coffee shop for sure. The latter is essentially... a lot of sexting... if that wasn't obvious - but also it's a double plotline (think love triangle but there's only two people quote unquote double identity but no one knows it vibes LOL). S.M.U.T withe @inexplicablymine will be too because it'll explore a lot of fic tropes but it's also very silly funny

11. Which WIP is the angstiest?

Henry is a Painting for the reasons I mentioned. Soulmates too because it deals a lot with unrequited love in a way that parallels canon but with much higher stakes

12. Which WIP has the best characterization (in your humble opinion)?

I would hope all of them but maybe Walk and Talk. It's from Henry's POV but I really love how I'm writing Alex - he's very open and effervescent and full of light vibes

13. Which WIP has the best scene setting (in your humble opinion)?

I'll answer this in a slightly different way and say Soulmates because it's my foray into world building and I have an entire soulmate system (and the magical realism elements) planned out that I'm very proud of because I don't think the exact thing that I'm doing has been done before

14. Which WIP have you worked the hardest on?

Walk and Talk has extensive scenes planned and a full outline - there's still some wiggly room in the middle/figuring out the order of things though but I'll figure it out. Soulmates too because, y'know, the outline is nine pages long and isn't even done yet

15. Which WIP do you have the highest expectations for? Why?

I'm such a broken record wow. Walk and Talk is my BABY - it has a very fun formatting because it is essentially and irl epistolary and i've been sitting on it for over a month now waiting to get started. Soulmates is an idea I'm insanely proud of and I can't wait to see it come to the page. Henry is a Painting has the potential to be... dare I say it... kind of beautiful and introspective? Idk when I'll start it because it scares me I need to handle it carefully and when I'm truly ready

16. Do you dream about any of your WIP’s?

Not that I can remember. Though, it will be like 2 a.m. and I'll roll over to tell siri to write stuff down and hope it's legible in the morning

17. Do any of your WIP’s have any particular complexities that your other fics don’t?

Walk and Talk has an interesting formatting to separate scenes. Soulmates has a... soulmate system (duh) and magical realism elements. Also any of these that are a multichap or a 3/5+1 because I've only ever written one shots

18. Which WIP is the funniest or has the most humor?

Walk and Talk, Phone-Sex Worker/Coffee Shop, and Secret Santa I would say

19. Do any of your WIPs contain outside POVs or a deep dive on a character other than the main ship? How are you finding that process?

Sadly no but I'd like to do so one day

20. Tell us one thing we don’t know about one or more of your WIPs.

I could ramble forever (maybe I should do an ask game... hmmmm)

The idea for Walk and Talk came from my real life. Essentially, it's when you make a pal in class, they wait for you when it's over, and walk down the hall with you to carry on conversing until y'all have to part ways. And then it happens the next day. And the day after that. And the one after that too. You get the vibe. Now make it FirstPrince

I told myself that All of This Silence and Patience would never get a sequel until I got one (one.) comment asking for Alex's POV and then my mind starting buzzing and now y'all get a prequel instead

Uhhhh I've been tagged a lot so idk if I can tag as many people as WIPs but I would love to see anything from @anincompletelist @whimsymanaged @read-and-write- @tintagel-or-cockleshells @littlemisskittentoes @cricketnationrise @myheartalivewrites (no pressure) and anyone else who is seeing this! :)

#tag game #weekend wip game #wip tag game #affectionatelyrs #rwrb #red white and royal blue #rwrb fic #rwrb fanfic #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #firstprince #rwrb fandom #fanfiction

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eighthdoctor · 7 months

Note

Will the fic touch on how Jaina spent the happiest and most carefree years of her life under the assumption that she'd grow up to be the Queen of Lordaeron, and now many years and a lot of trauma later she is once again being courted by the ruler of that same nation?

so I don't usually get nitpicky in asks because you're coming from a place of good faith and I don't wanna bash that BUT there's some really interesting assumptions here that I am not going with at all

let's start with a timeline (...always subject to change as I decide blizzard is full of idiots):

when Jaina's around 5-8 years Derek dies. Jaina becomes presumptive heir to Kul Tiras (Admiralty succession could be it's own post lmao, here I'll just say that Tandred doesn't seem to be in the running until much later)

somewhere in the vicinity of 10-14 years Jaina starts attending Dalaran (does she live there year round? is it boarding school and she comes home over breaks? is this Jaina and she's already weirdly good with portals so she fucking commutes? we don't know). ALSO in this time period she's in and out of the Lordaeron court, possibly because Lordaeron is a natural stopping point on the way from Kul Tiras to Dalaran, possibly also because everyone is doing spouse shopping

the Third War is around when Jaina is 17-20 depending on how much angst you want in this. I'm typically pinning the founding of Theramore to Jaina being 20/21 and almost everything else happens when she's 19-20

why is this important? because it lets me nail down when those years were: maximum ages 10-20, much more likely to be 11-19 or 14-19.

and I would not say that adolescence is a happy and carefree time.

specifically, any arrangement between Arthas and Jaina is going to be a love match, so we're really looking at that 14-19 window especially the later years.

why a love match? because they're both heirs. unless there is a very, very compelling reason (ie, ending a war) nobody wants to marry two heirs to each other. that's a political nightmare. who lives where. does the spouse have any authority over the other country. what culture are the children raised in. who inherits what. what if you have 3 children. what if you have 0 children. what if you have ONE child does that ONE person inherit both countries and if so, what if THEY have TWO children are we separating them again??

(for historical examples: Isabella of Castile and Ferdinand of Aragon are a way this can work out, if contentiously and Aragon gets the short end of the stick a lot; Eleanor of Aquitaine and Henry ii of England are a way this does NOT work out and results in an awful lot of family feuds enacted via war. notably both of these are love matches and involved a LOT of paperwork.)

so: if the parents were visualizing marrying Jaina (the spare) to Arthas (the heir) BEFORE Derek's death they're certainly not AFTER. any wedding planning that happens is entirely because they fell in love.

okay so: Jaina is 15. she's head over heels in love with Arthas, but she sees him for a few weeks a year, on the way to and from school. most of the time she's in Dalaran (where, admittedly, she's brilliant, a prodigy--but not popular). some of the time she's in Boralus.

and on top of her schoolwork, she's got lessons from home about how to be Lord Admiral, because she's being prepared for that, because no one knows (least of all Daelin) when she might need to inherit, and she's got lessons from EVERYONE on how to balance being Queen-Consort and Lord Admiral, and her big brother is still extremely dead and her dad was so traumatized from it he's had a personality shift, and orcish internment, and of course her choice in spouses is driving half of this stress so it's her fault, and--

and just being 15.

if you asked her, on the ship to Kalimdor, what the best part of her life was, she'd say before Derek's death, before she had to become someone else at 8 years old

but I'd give a contender for a different happiest period of her life, and that's as Lady of Theramore, which seems an odd choice (the apocalypse? Daelin's death?) except that: she's independent. she has (mostly) loyal people, and she's got friends (plural!). there's no switching of what hat she's wearing today. she has control of her life, and she's able to make a real, meaningful difference to both the people of Theramore and periodically everyone else too.

at any rate the actual answer to the actual question you asked: it will definitely be a source of reflection to 'return' to Lordaeron in any way, and there will be comparisons between Sylvanas and Arthas. but Jaina concluded that things with Arthas would never work, so she's much less hung up on that than on like. the Broken Shore. Teldrassil.

#asks for ts #Anonymous #the power to manipulate belief #somewhere along the line i realized that the way to win interviews #is you answer the question you WANTED them to ask #and just do so confidently and without apology #and everyone will go along with it #this is also my approach to asks :P

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eusuntgratie · 8 months

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fuck it friday

tagged by @onward--upward who is working on an amazing rwrb au that’s making me lose my mind a little.

fuck it friday = post whatever you want. ideas, snippets, art, not fic, whatever. fuck it! post whatever you want!

i haven’t had much time to write, but i always have a million ideas running around in my head, so i thought i’d share a few ideas and a few things i’m working on. if you have ideas/thoughts or want to scream at me about which i should work on, please feel free to share, because my brain is currently a big ol’ mess and i’m not getting anywhere with anything.

dumotanger abo college au... snippet shared here. where am i going with this? who could say.

tknp patty retires fic which i have been working on for *checks notes* A YEAR. lots of snippets in #patty retires fic

sid and geno read thirst tweets bc i had too much fun doing tknp. sid is unphased by blatantly sexual commentary about his ass and thighs because he’s so used to it. geno is impatient with too many sid tweets and tries to steer the conversation back to him and how hot he is.

geno and tanger hook up on the dads trip bc i love pain and sadness

firstprince college au... alex finds tightlaced, obnoxious henry drunk off his ass at a party and takes care of him. how’d this get in here? shhh back to hockey but rwrb maybe ate my brain a little.

tangerkarlsson freak4freak... maybe from sid’s pov. he is alarmed he is concerned he does not get it but also... it’s kinda hard to look away.

a sequel to liar i’ve been dreaming about since i wrote it where geno makes tanger write their numbers on sid with a sharpie.

i’d have to rewatch the episode, but i’d love to write a badwrong buck/kameron hookup from the episode where she runs away to his loft. all buck wants is to be chosen, to be needed. he feels like everyone finds him wanting, but kameron is carrying HIS baby and when she panicked and didn’t know where to go she came to HIM. the man has some feelings about that and some unhealthy coping mechanisms. and uh. sex is a great way to induce labor. so. yeah. i’m thinking some thoughts.

i haven’t touched it in AWHILE but i want to write some mess about this mess. why are you trying to kill the tiny man, pld? maybe bc the guy you’ve been hooking up with in winnipeg and accidentally fell for can hardly look you in the eye because he’s still so hung up on somebody who he never even had. DELICIOUS.

i have more, but yeah. i got that 5 million wips at a time disease real bad. this is only three fandoms, so that’s pretty good. SIGH.

tagging anybody with something to share but also no pressure tagging @voxofthevoid @jbarneswilson @lostcol @ghostgeno

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mermaidsirennikita · 8 months

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Sorry but i need to hear more about Adam Driver Face and Adam Driver Body in romance novels and possibly how this pertains to Forget Me Not by Julie Soto.

Lol this is a hot take so I'm gonna publish it

I know that for some reason being attracted to Adam Driver is Controversial, and indeed a lot of Reylo fic authors flipping into romance is Controversial... It shouldn't be. Aside from Big Deal Ship Writers flipping into romance writers being a tale as old as time, ESPECIALLY post-Twilight (lots of authors who've been successful for quite a while now are former Twific authors--EL James is just, unfortunately, the biggest name), the concept of an Adam Driver-shaped man as a romance hero is so... obviously something that fits.

Because I'm gonna tell you right fucking now, lol--while Henry Cavill is the dude everyone and their mom fancasts for every. white. romance hero. ever (and plenty of romance heroes who aren't white but everyone just ignores that) I would argue that a lot of authors had Adam Driver-shaped guys in mind. Not Adam Driver, necessarily. I imagine a lot of writers do not have actors in mind at all when the y write (I don't). But someone who is closer to Adam Driver than Henry Cavill.

Why? Because romance heroes, at the end of the day, are often not men who jive with the concept of typical actors, ESPECIALLY not today (because white actors today have become incredibly homogenous in terms of looks, and additionally currently trend more towards a very youthful, softer look, which is fine but is not what romance heroes have been in the past and honestly... even post-cinnamon roll, largely are in the present). A lot of romance heroes in books that aren't like, pumped out with zero thought (because there are those) are not described as like, the most beautiful guy in the room. There's a reason why we love the scarred hero, right? Romance heroes owe their roots more to men like Mr. Rochester--guys who are often NOT conventionally hot, but ARE incredibly compelling.

Like, of course you have your Sebastian St. Vincents, the guys who are incandescently hot (Sebastian St. Vincent has Jude Law Face and Jude Law Body, LOOK AT WHEN THE BOOK WAS WRITTEN AND KNOW IT IN YOUR HEART). But many more heroes, especially in again, well-written romances, are more like Derek Craven, who's described as having a fuckton of presence, a fuckton of sexuality, but as often being "almost handsome", with snaggle teeth and a general "coarseness".

Which makes sense, right? Because, to this day, and I'm not saying this is a good thing, m/f romance heroes are meant to contrast to their heroines. And their heroines are often, if not hyperfeminine, then still the feminine presence in the room. Even in books like Knockout where the heroine is not this small delicate flower--in some ways, it's often even more important for the hero to contrast to her. Because a heroine like Imogen wants a man who supports and accepts her, but also makes her feel like she is something to be cherished and protected. Tommy being someone who can pick her up and gather her in his arms appeals to her. And I think that is something that every woman, regardless of her size or her preference in men's appearances, can relate to.

Also, a lot of romance authors are trickling down from older generations of romance authors. While those authors did not have an Adam Driver lol, they did have this preference towards the massive guy who Isn't Handsome But He's Got Somethin'. And so, the romance authors who grew up on that still want that. I know that the fetishized Big Hero has been a hot topic as of late... If I'm being real, I don't think he's going anywhere. There will be more space for heroes who are not like that, but it's a personal preference thing, and a lot of authors (and readers) do like to read about that. I don't know that that's a bad.... thing.

So when you look at actors today who fit that--this big guy with a big body that nonetheless doesn't seem immediately like a gym body (though it is, lol, I think he's just perhaps better at building muscle from... working out... versus steroids.... because the roles he takes do not require roid-level muscle, for one thing) and a face that seems like it could take a beating and he wouldn't go "not my face"--there are very few aside from Adam Driver. Like, in reality, Geralt should have a nose that's broken 58 different ways, but aside from magic, he's Henry Cavill and Henry Cavill isn't gonna get his face legit fucked up. Because Adam Driver is not "pretty" in any way, I think he reads as a different type of masculine to those that appreciate his appearance, and that kind of masculine translates to romance heroes very easily. And Adam Driver Body just is Big Man Romance Hero Body, because, sorry, he's got a very good body and even if you don't like his face I think that's just. A fact lol. If you don't like tall broad fit guys that's fine, but he's clearly a very fit, physical person and he's a very physical actor which makes this more noticeable.

But I would say that ALL OF THIS comes across in a larger way because very fewer actors right now look like him. Not just in his unconventional (I mean is it tho... or are we just so used to homogeny in actors that it seemed unconventional today... I'm gonna tell y'all right now, everyone and their mom was into Alan Rickman when I was growing up, and I GET IT... it's the same motherfucking look lol) face, but in his general appearance. He seems BIGGER because he's actually an actor who's broad and 6'3"; a lot of taller actors are slimmer, on that very obvious 'roid muscle which doesn't translate in the same sense, or are NOT. ACTUALLY. THAT TALL LOL. and lie about their height. So he seems bigger in contrast.

But then there's the Adam Driver Vibe, which, especially post-Reylo, is something I think appeals to romance writers even more and that is what you see in Forget Me Not (a book written by a Reylo fic writer, which I enjoyed quite a bit). The hero in that book is such a good example of an Adam Driver-coded hero. And let's be clear, I have no idea what the man is like in his real life. He barely talks to the press, and by God I hope he keeps it that way. But because he doesn't talk to the press, people assume quiet; because when he does, he seems to be a pretty nice guy and seems to get along with his costars just fine, people assume nice; they assume things based on him being with the same woman since college, etc. Romance people package this into a hero type that has been around for a long time, but they can now plaster onto the Adam Driver Vibe. The guy who is kinda quiet and gruff but actually sweet, who will fix your car without a word while thinking that you're kind of a FUCKING IDIOT for not getting your car fixed earlier, but it's only because he actually loves you and just doesn't want you to get hurt, and he's not an asshole about it, he just tenses so that you can see the corded muscles in his forearms and speaks in a tight voice about how you REALLY need to TAKE THIS INTO THE SHOP more OFTEN.

But why would you, because he's competent and does man stuff more? (Even though Adam Driver, as far as I know, lives in a very nice home in Brooklyn and loves traveling to Italy which is why he does as many movies in Italy as possible, people think of him as very 'salt of the Earth homegrown' because Midwest and because we don't see him acting like a Typical Actor in interviews, and this sticks onto his romance descendants as well). It's the sense of competence that people want, and you see that a lot in Forget Me Not. Quiet, so we can assume from the quietness that he's yearning and longing (which he is). Competent, annoyed but only because he cares too much.

And, of course, he can throw the heroine around in bed, which is something I think people project onto Adam Driver because a lot of the bigness is really connected to this concept in the first place... But also because he has done a good amount of sex scenes, unlike a LOT of actors of his caliber in this day and age, and for that matter a lot of PRETTIER actors around his gen, because actors like Chris Evans and Hemsworth got locked into Marvel contracts early and don't do sex. Adam Driver was fuckin' in House of Gucci and that was pretty recent lol. I think that the fact that you do see him in this context makes a difference. Also, while not every sex scene... not many sex scenes... in Girls were hot, he did do a lot of that shit, and though I hate Lena Dunham with all my soul, I would theorize that the fact that you not only saw him be sexual (in a simulated way) with a woman who was not thin by any means onscreen, picking her up and shit, made an impression. As did that scene where he bench-pressed Shiri Appleby, would recommend... tracking that down... if you have not...

Like, there are a lot of Adam Driver-coded heroes out there, and not all of them are Reylo heroes. I do not see Sworn to the Shadow God by Ruby Dixon a Reylo book (for one thing, the heroine is Latina). But the hero??? So Adam Driver-coded. He's big, his face is like, Kinda Weirdly Too Much But Also Hot, he's kinda quiet and awkward but by God he means well and he will make the heroine come 75 times if he's got anything to say about it. There are heroes who were written Before the Days of Adam Driver who still read more as that motherfucker than any other actor today (THE HERO FROM THE RAVEN PRINCE IS NOT HENRY CAVILL WITH SCARS SHUT UP).

It's not just a look, it is a vibe, and it is entirely this thing that everyone has made up and projected onto that man lol. Which is a lot easier to do with him than ANY other actor, because Adam Driver. Does not talk. Which--so many actors should just not talk. (But, and this is a petty thing so I'll say it--a lot of his peers do need to sell themselves based off personality and he generally doesn't because he's a legit good actor sorry sorry sorry.) However, him not talking kind of makes him the perfect romance hero projection figure. The less we know about him, the more we can Imagine. I know Henry Cavill has a thing for girls who are way too young for him, right? I don't know fuck all about Adam Driver's romantic life aside from him being married to Joanne a long time.

In conclusion, it's a whole deal not even just the body and the face, and it's not surprising to me that it's something that a lot of romance writers and readers have latched on to.

#romance novel blogging

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cha-melodius · 7 months

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I got a list, so you get a list. 4, 11, 20 (please take this as permission to answer 20 as many times as you want, I LOVE LOVE LOVE writer meta)

xoxo MJ/kiwiana-writes

Ahahaha I will always take a list!! Thanks! You're out here with some ones that made me have to think for a little while lol. (Meta asks for writers link since there's a cut at the end of this post.)

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

Pretty sure I've shared this before in a question like this, but too bad. I just love the tension that builds in this sequence (and the release that comes immediately after this; spoiler alert: Alex runs). From Chapter 7 of Nova, Baby:

Diego chokes out a fake laugh, but there is real fear in his eyes now. “I’m sure I do not know what you’re talking about. You know my customers are never for sale.” “So it wasn’t money, then,” Alex surmises. It’s not that surprising. Batista is good at hitting people where it hurts. Diego says nothing. “How long do I have?” Alex asks. Out in front of the store, a car door slams. “Better for you if you don’t run,” Diego murmurs. Fat chance of that.

11. What do you envy in other writers?

Oh, a number of things. The biggest ones are probably humor—I think my writing can be reasonably funny but not the kind of side-splitting hysterical one-liners some people pull off—and really poetic, beautiful language. Sometimes when I read a really achingly beautiful work I feel like giving up lmao. Oh, and some people just seem to be able to pull off effortlessly sexy writing—not even talking about smut here, but just the overall vibes of the work. I mean, it's probably not effortless, knowing what I know about writing, but it feels that way.

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

Oh man, the meta question. I do love talking about meta in my writing but I never know which fic to pick when people ask me these questions. Ok, this time, instead of focusing on one work, I'm including one piece of trivia about the last 5 works I published lmao.

The post-blowjob scene in Falling Down the Stairs of Your Smile was added at the last minute (literally I had already uploaded a draft to AO3 before I went back and added it) because I just got it in my head that I really needed a moment of Henry telling Alex to stay. I love thinking about all the ways that would fundamentally change their relationship from the beginning.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, I did a fair amount of reading about people surviving on rafts in the ocean for Enemies of the Ocean. There are lots of crazy stories out there, and one of them—Steve Callahan—is referenced in the fic. The most insane part about THAT is that Callahan's boat was called the Napoleon Solo. Yes, really. Too bad the story was for a different fandom.

The sir/daddy pronouns joke in Something To Be Proud Of, which several commenters loved, was shamelessly stolen from @dumbpeachjuice. See! I'm not actually that funny. 😂

I really wanted them to get caught in the rain wearing less clothing in Lessons in Foreign Diplomacy (by which I mean wearing only a shirt and pants and not a full waistcoat and jacket combo), but @orchidscript disabused me of the notion that anyone would be strolling the grounds in such scandalous attire lol.

Although I have in fact visited the Harrods Food Hall, I have eaten only one of the cheeses featured in Will You Brie Mine? (manchego), to my deep disappointment. Someone get me some monk's head cheese, stat. Also I went back and forth about whether to make Henry a baker or confectioner or something of the sort, but the man gives cheese recommendations in canon! How could I resist?

#ask games #about my fics #nova baby #rwrb fic #rwrb

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cultofsappho · 6 months

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20 questions for fic writers

Thank you so much @myheartalivewrites!! i feel so guilty getting these tags when I haven't posted on ao3 in a hot minute haha

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently, 16. but i orphaned a lot back in the day. I think i've probably written closer to 25-30 total in my life.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

300,037!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Red, White & Royal Blue mostly but i've been thinking baout branching out soon. I've also written Snowbaz, Cemetery Boys, and Jonjay

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Family Lines

How To Be Friends With The FSOTUS

With All The Air In My Lungs

Asking For Permission

Décollage

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to but i'm not the best honestly, working on getting better and replying to more! I always feel guilty when I can't think of a response haha

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Definitely I'm Taking A Ride With My Best Friend. It's bittersweet to say the least. When you've gone through hell and back with your person, and he's hurt you, but he's also the best part of your life... how do you move forward? how do you re-learn to coexist when you're no longer running for your life? I somehow thought I could answer those questions in one epilogue chapter....

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my endings are very very happy, but probably Family Lines. Adoption, and family, and recovery, and ahhhh adorable family being adorable things!!

2nd place might be Poison in His Blood bc i wrote this angsty ass chonic illlness werewolf au fic and the fluffy (lol) ending took all of us by suprise I think

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really, but i've had a few like "i really wanted it to end like ____ :( " or "I think there's more you could have dug into with ____ :(" which i know aren't hate, but disppointing readers feels similar.

And once, a trump supporter got mad at me in my Superman and Lois fic's comments. Which is still fucking hilarious to this day bc for some reason they thought a literal alien wouldn't support immigration reform... and this was a comic book fan fic about superman's son being bi as all hell... fascinating...

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes and no. Have I written smut? yes. like, twice total. Do I enjoy writing it? no. I read a ton of it but, it's not my writing niche.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i don't think so?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not yet! very open to it tho!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No and I don't think I would. I'm too much of a perfectionist

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

alex and henry 🥺 the best boys of all best boys

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

the spiderman one. I had an idea for Henry being Pretty Darn Sure that Alex is spiderman and putting himslf into situations where he'd run into him but... if across the spiderverse didn't reignite my love for spiderman enough to write it then idk what will

16. What are your writing strengths?

probably dialogue, including internal dialogue, I think. It comes much easier to me than ambiance/setting descripitons.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

smut for one. definitely need to work on pacing too.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I avoid it heavily. I took 4 years of french in high school but it's been years since then and my knowledge on it is preschool at best. another thing to work on tho!!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I can't even remember anymore and I never want to know. trist me, you want me to repress that shit even more than I do.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

jesus how could any writer pick??? Maybe I'm Taking A Ride With My Best Friend. It's my longest fic, and was definitly my biggest challenge. And, although there's things I'd change about it if I could, i'm still very proud of what I made! my traumatic little baby...

oh my no idea who to tag here so i'm going for the mutuals again, so sorry if you've already been tagged and no pressure!! @penna-nomen @cosmicalart @sherryvalli @jesuisici33 @14carrotghoul @cha-melodius and open tag to anyone who hasn't shared yet!!

#tag game #ao3 #writing

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faithfromanewperspective · 10 months

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The sticky lens of gender, part 2: Michelle/Matthew Fairchild, scandal, mortal danger, self-harm, healing love, and Bejeweled

Can she still make the whole place shimmer? Does she need to, and could a woman even be expected to at all, in Edwardian London?

@thevagabondexpress has a habit of creating (or rather reimagining) the most heartbreaking and endearing and three-dimensional characters (thus pausing my fic writing so I can do this instead in the same document while I’m on the bus outside places I can connect to wi-fi, my phone having died just at the very end of Easy For You To Say, so now I’m listening to Cold As You from the CD I burned onto my laptop last decade. Xe should become a famous fantasy author. And my fic will be better after analysing the characters from this perspective—that is, a parallel universe in which everything is shifted just enough to feel trippy. Maybe the series drugged me, or maybe I went to Tasmania. See, I’m going off on tangents like Matthew Fairchild would, I’m not sure about Michelle).

Misha’s probably the one character that the story had to change the most. And the main thing I’ll attribute it to, other than the fact that the events of Cast Long Shadows couldn’t happen to a genderbent Charlotte and Henry, is the extreme double standard when it comes to sexual expression and scandal. Different trauma and a different event she just can’t let go of. Overall, it means, similarly to Judith, that I think we see a little clearer how fragile she is, and just how much she’s suffering alone. So buckle up for a long post (and there's a playlist coming).

I’m trying to trace the cause-and-effect between story and perception, where the impact of society on these characters has created the rift between the Revolutionary Company (?) and the Merry Thieves. Maybe it’s in their group name but the general vibe I get is that they seem a lot more unhappy. Or they hold their pain a lot closer to the surface. Michelle starts off like this, at least. As time goes on—not so much. (Which is maybe why I’m so worried about her). I think this is where it’s most obvious that it was written pre-Chain of Thorns, where most of Matthew’s story arc (which might be my favourite in all of TSC) happens. Misha hasn’t gotten there yet. Maybe she’s not the same person, off chasing colourful adventures. Maybe she would be, given she marries someone who has. Maybe a girl who’s creative and charming and friendly wouldn’t get the same attention and validation that a boy would, but criticised, chastised, corrected. Wouldn’t develop the confidence to travel alone, but would be drawn to someone who did. Maybe this is a prime example of the intersection of growing up female and neurodivergent, in a society where there were a lot of pressures on women (and it’s true, isn’t it, that the lack of demons in London for so many years was what catalysed the importation of mundane prejudices and silly social rules into the Enclave). She beats herself up over everything. She’s less unapologetically herself, and instead, the self-destructiveness behind the things she does are more obvious, given that it’s not just being a bohemian, it’s endangering her life without thought to the consequences. As if the consequences of staying still would be worse than whatever could be out there—I understand that one all too well. I’d be so worried if I were Hattie and Chester. I’m surprised Judith isn’t, and Tracey too. I can see why Fields is. But there’s not a lot any of them can do, except be there without judgement.

And I think that’s true of Matthew as well. It’s been coined on here a fair bit that his promiscuity (is that a mean word to say? I don’t want to mean it that way) is a form of self-harm, and I’d say also escapism. I’d say his whole experience with Downworld is, from that first day in CLS Jem saw him at the Shadow Market: he seems almost too happy and in awe then, as if it’s so starkly contrasted to the constraining, unbearable, painful-but-he-doesn’t-know-why life that he’s just high on all of it, and that high makes him unstable. It’s both a form of hypomania that I’m only starting to learn how to conceptualise (in my view, I may be wrong) and an abstraction of the way that people who have been abused as children tend to seek out (unintentionally, but it feels familiar but different enough to trick them into thinking it’s healthier, while having no concept of that that actually is) relationships that are also abusive. In Matthew’s case, the Hell Ruelle treat him as—what was it?—“a silly child, who is drawn to the flame because it is beautiful, without thinking that he might get hurt”—or something along those lines. It’s exciting and thrilling rather than dull responsibility, but either way, he grew up taking care of his father and feeling like he had no value otherwise, and now he spends his free time being entertaining and flirtatious and feeling like he has no value otherwise. I think in Matthew’s case that isn’t specifically addressed—his drinking is, and it’s linked back to that one traumatic event, but if you can read between the lines there is so much more that he’s caught up in and it’s kind of terrifying. Somehow, having a genderbent character makes it more explicit: that Michelle’s lifestyle could have killed her if it weren’t for her dog. It just hits you that there’s this little 17-18yo girl who can’t stop running into danger, she’s so loved by the other characters and yet running from a kind of torment the reader mostly sees from the outside. (Also I love the conceptualisation of Hattie and how much she cares for her but doesn’t know how). Misha’s the kind of character you want to take care of so overwhelmingly, but it’d be almost impossible to do so in a sustainable way: she keeps everyone, even her parabatai, at arm’s length so she doesn’t take them down with her. And I don’t know how to work with that, but I do relate and I do find that I want to imagine the possibilities of how she might feel better (it’s for me as much as her, and pretty similar to what a lot of us on here do in our matthew fics).

I think the first example we see of this is the shadow-to-chiswick event where Judith just disappears after Misha calls her a child of demons and says that’s where she belongs (canon). But what we don’t see in canon is the way Tracey and Christa send her home after and get mad she said that (in canon matthew is tearing apart the Institute trying to find James). And I know it was plot so she could go out and do things with fields. But I feel like that event kinda broke Misha’s friendship with the others, which, as we see in Chain of Thorns, was something Matthew really needed. Anyway, I feel like their paths branch off quite significantly from there; unfortunately it does mean we miss out on a lot of the parabatai relationship we see between James and Math. But in some ways it does suit these au characters better: both are very independent, and self-destructive in different ways. Not that James and Matthew aren’t, but a lot of what they go through is cushioned by privilege and the simple fact that men can wander around and get up to whatever bad ideas they like, without too great social repercussions or worries for their safety. While I’m there, I think another thing that would’ve been really cool to explore is Misha’s friendship with Addison (alt-Anna) and how they could’ve been there for one another in a way most couldn’t (and in the way we see Matthew and Anna doing exactly that). But instead we have Fields.

Because Misha’s scandal and trauma was to do with a romantic relationship (with an older girl, who was such a careless predator and I hate that for her, I bet she was targeted as the Consul’s daughter the same way Matthew was by Mother Hawthorne) it makes sense to resolve that by putting her in a relationship that has the potential to bring healing. And Fields is also an older girl, which I don’t think really matters but what does is that she is respectful, kind, caring, and wants Misha to heal—at times almost in a forceful way, but she’s self-aware of that and also very much able to radically accept and hold space for her the way her friends and family aren’t able to. Where she doesn’t feel like she has to put her own struggles on hold to look after them. (Matthew also does feel like he has to put his own struggles aside to take care of his friends, which he does imperfectly but it does seem to actually keep him going more often than not: the need to still be a full-functioning shadowhunter I think means his pride is able to keep him from giving up a lot of the time, combined with the love he has for his friends—but for a man to be the mum-friend is seen as going above and beyond; for a woman, it’s kind of expected and we kind of are expected to put our needs on hold to care for absolutely everyone else and then gaslit about having needs or struggles in the first place, creating an endless pile of demands for us to hurt ourselves with when there is no other feasible way out. So I think it is good for Misha to have this taken off her chest even with one person, even if it does mean the close vibe of the girls at the start of the story disintegrates rather than strengthens with what they go through, as it does for the Merry Thieves.)

Speaking of scandal and trauma and how helpless women were at the time, I think one thing that really broke my heart to read was the way Misha collected letters etc that might lead towards Lisette (that’s her name, right) getting some sort of justice. She can’t have much retribution (at least, she doesn’t seem to have the capacity, connections-wise, mental space-wise, etc, to press charges the way Alice does against Claire). She’s also being abused by her older sister, and neither her parents nor parabatai and other friends seem to have the resources to hold space for her to simply let her guard down and just be. Fields does. It’s hard for her, when she has so little power: she has the fame of being the Consul’s daughter, but in some ways it’s worse than not having that at all as all it means is she gets more scrutiny and no real impact. Her Big Trauma was having her secrets and privacy and dignity put in the hands of those who don’t care about her, so many of them, who just judge her and scrutinise and victim-blame until there is no escape. She feels trapped, she was barely holding it together to begin with, and Fields brings with her stories and promise of freedom. In some ways, she’s perfect for Misha. I don’t know if there would be some counterpart who would be perfect for Matthew when he has the ability to chase freedom on his own (also, I think Math can really be himself around James, whereas Judith is very distracted and doesn’t have the same emotional intelligence that would be able to hold the waterfall of hurt Misha keeps to herself; James finds Matthew both relatable and the fact that he’s a lot more transparent than Misha also makes it easier to air out what exactly he’s feeling, which, I think, often would fall under dysphoric mania). But that leads me to my final point.

This one’s inspired by Taylor Swift’s Bejeweled, the first instalment in my Misha playlist which also includes Tina Arena’s You Set Fire To My Life (@ fields maybe) as well as Taylor Swift’s Tied Together With A Smile, long story short, Cold As You, Innocent, Picture to Burn, Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve, Lavender Haze, mirrorball, and the lakes; Imagine Dragons’ Giants, Dull Knives, and Easy Come Easy Go, 5 Seconds of Summer’s Red Line, TEARS!, COMPLETE MESS, Easy For You To Say, Jet Black Heart, Moodswings, and Rejects; Ashton Irwin’s Heart Shaped Box, Scar, and Drive; Luke Hemmings’ Slip Away, and Diamonds; Little Big Town’s The Thing That Wrecks You; and Delta Goodrem’s Safe to Believe. But the reason I highlight Bejeweled is that it’s a song about discovering yourself as someone who brightens the mood and is the life of the party, after being held back by a relationship, by demands and expectations. Misha is very much held back, except in her case it might be a relationship that helps her find herself again. But it’s too soon to know, I think—I haven’t seen if she is able to become the life of the party like Matthew is, discover herself, create, and brighten up the world.

#matthew fairchild #genderbent tsc #genderbent tlh #the last hours #dysphoric mania #when i walk in the room i can still make the whole place shimmer

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