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soobmint · 4 years ago

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paper hearts | choi soobin [f] ; [c] 80s! au, 9.6k words

s u m m a r y ; if there was one thing you wanted to avoid on valentine’s day, it was running into your ex best friend, choi soobin. but when a series of unfortunate events involving too much purple eyeshadow, drunken punches, and one stolen bicycle leads you right back to his side, you begin to realize that maybe you truly belonged with him all along.

c o n t e n t s ; soobin x fem!reader, 80s! au, valentine’s day, ex best friend! soobin, rich boy! soobin, but he’s a major dweeb and the biggest softie, yeonjun is a major prick (i’m so sorry junnie), reader is a part time worker, soobin is best friends with lee felix of stray kids, some themes of social classes, roughly inspired by the 80s movie “pretty in pink,” mentions drugs, alcohol, and single parent households, mostly just fluff, fluff, and more fluff, with a hint of crack/humor

n o t e ; hello friends! this was a very quickly planned, last minute valentine’s day idea, and it’s actually a collab with one of my dearest friends, @chanluster ! she posted her piece of the collab as well, you can check it out by going to the collab masterlist here! this was so much fun to write and i think that 80s! soobin was just too good of a concept to pass up! anyways, happy valentine’s day, i hope you enjoy this oneshot! do leave a like, reblog, or comment if you could, it really helps so much <3

[back to my masterlist] [oneshot playlist]

IF ONE MORE CUT-OUT, CRAFT-PAPER HEART HIT YOU IN THE FACE, YOU WERE GOING TO QUIT YOUR JOB.

Of course you would never actually quit. With your mother out of the picture and your father working nonstop overtime just to barely have enough cash to put food on the table for the both of you, you had come to rely on your minimum wage part-time hours more than you liked to admit. However, the handmade strings of paper hearts that hung from wall to wall throughout the entirety of the record shop you were employed at was enough to make you consider it; not to mention the Phil Collins record that had been spinning all day, filling your ears with melodies embodying the very air of romance, and the embarrassing pink sweater your boss had forced you to wear. You mumbled curses beneath your breath as you pulled at the collar, itching away at your neck.

When you made a step towards a crate full of records, ready to tidy it up after a customer had rummaged through it leaving it a mess, you were met with another face full of cheap red construction paper. With a large growl of exasperation, you swatted at the hearts and accidentally caused the entire string of them to fall to the ground. You cleared your throat, glad that no customers were present to see your little outburst.

Your boss, Jen, still saw it all.

“That’s not very festive of you, kid,” She said, taking a drag on her cigarette. “It’s Valentine’s Day! Lighten up.”

“Ah, my bad. I forgot that I was supposed to be overjoyed on the day honoring the execution of St. Valentine,” You said as you gave her a sarcastic smile. “I’ll make sure to smile at the next couple that walks in and ask them how they plan to contribute to the commercialization of a martyr’s death.”

“You must be real fun at parties,” Jen mumbled. She shook her cigarette at you from behind the counter. “You’re just bitter because you don’t have a valentine. I can’t blame anyone for giving you the cold shoulder with that attitude of yours.”

You scowled, picking up the string of hearts that you had sent crashing to the floor. “I’m not bitter, and I don’t want a date. Also, I told you to stop smoking inside! It smells awful.”

“Last I checked, this was my shop, not yours.” You rolled your eyes as you approached the counter, handing the discarded string to Jen so she could throw it in the trash. “Now you’re making me do chores for you too? You’ve got some nerve, I’ll give you that.”

“Jen, please, I’m really not in the mood for this today.”

Jen shrugged, bending towards the trash can to throw away the string of hearts when she paused and pulled something from the bin. You glanced over your shoulder and gasped when you saw what she held in her hand—a small red envelope with your name scrawled across the front and a pink heart-shaped sticker stuck on the back.

“What’s this?” Jen asked, opening the envelope and shaking out the contents. A single slip of paper fell out, landing atop the counter. You rushed to grab it, but Jen snatched it up just before your fingers reached the countertop.

“Give me that,” You insisted, face growing warm. “I threw it away for a reason!”

“It’s an invitation to a party?” She seemed beyond surprised, glancing back and forth between you and the paper several times. “You got invited to a Valentine’s Day party, and instead of going, you asked me to give you extra hours? Why?”

You looked down at your feet, digging the toe of your sneaker into the blue carpet. There were, in fact, many reasons why you did not want to go to that party. They were as follows:

One: Choi Yeonjun was the one who had invited you. After you had rejected his offer when he asked to take you to a basketball game a month before, you could barely make eye contact with him in the school hallway without feeling guilty. That and the fact that he was one of the richest preps in the school, you knew he had just been asking you out for some sort of prank or dare that you preferred to not potentially fall victim to.

Two: you needed to work as much as you could. Money, as always, was tight for you and your father. There was no way you would sacrifice precious hours to go to a party full of rich kids where nothing but humiliation was sure to await you.

Three: your old childhood friend and the one person you couldn’t bear to see was probably going to be there—Choi Soobin.

You had barely spoken to Soobin in the four years you had been in high school. Crossing paths with him in the cafeteria, turning down the same aisle of books as him in the library, all those tiny stolen glances and accidental encounters were the only bits of interaction you had kept throughout all that time. The worst part was, he hadn’t done anything wrong.

It was nothing but your own cowardice that had driven the two of you apart, and you were still too afraid to own up to it.

Instead of explaining all of this to Jen, you simply shrugged and said, “I dunno. It just sounds lame.”

Your boss sighed, holding the invitation out towards you. “Okay, I’m letting you off early. Go to the party.”

With wide eyes, you shook your head immediately. “Absolutely not. Why in the world would I go?”

“Well, first of all, it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity for you. Who knows when your next chance to go to a party will be.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at that.

“Second, it’s a holiday! The only reason I even opened today was because you were begging me for hours. I thought it was because you were bummed about having no plans, but clearly it’s because you wanted an excuse to be a recluse.”

“Hey, I’m not a recluse.”

“Clearly.” She shook the invitation at you once more, brows raised. “If you go, I’ll raise your pay by fifty cents for the next month.”

Your ears perked up at that.

“Well?” She asked, well aware that she had hit the jackpot. “What'd ya say?”

Weighing the risks against the benefits, you bit the inside of your cheek.

“Make it a dollar and you’ve got a deal.”

“HAPPY VALENTINE’S, CHOI.”

When Soobin heard the sarcastic remark coming from his best friend, Felix, he had to fight back the urge to burst into tears then and there. He still wasn’t quite sure how Felix had convinced him to come, but he was already regretting it. The last thing he wanted to do to celebrate the day dedicated to love was spend it at a house party—or, as Soobin preferred to call them, any outcast high school kid’s version of hell on earth.

With a quick peek between his fingers, which he had used to cover his eyes immediately upon arriving at the site of the Valentine’s party, Soobin caught another eye-full of couples getting all too familiar with one another out in the open. He gulped, letting his hands grip the handles of the bike as he averted his gaze, choosing to cast his best glare at Felix, who was busy adjusting his ever-present beanie.

“Shut up,” he murmured, slowly sliding off the seat of his bike. He dusted off the worn, tearing cushion, glancing around the area. “Now quick, we gotta put our stuff somewhere safe.”

Felix looked aghast, making no moves to help Soobin in his search for a hiding spot. “What are you doing?”

“Tryna find a safe place for my bike?” He thought the answer to be somewhat obvious, but clearly Felix wasn’t on the same track of thinking. “You don’t know today’s world! Anyone is willing to steal nowadays.”

“Soobin, your bike is coughing up oil from its chains. It should be in its own care home at this rate.”

“I don’t wanna hear your slander, skater boy,” Soobin retorted, eyeing Felix’s ebony skateboard that he refused to be seen without. As if on cue, when he pushed his bike forward, the chains squealed, drawing the attention of a pair of particularly passionate individuals who had been wrapped up with one another moments before. Soobin ignored their annoyed stares, feeling his ears burn from embarrassment. He glanced back to Felix. “Help me find a hiding spot.”

Felix was anything but enthusiastic, but he began to help Soobin search nonetheless.

“Slide it in here, Soobs,” Felix called a few moments later. He was pointed to an empty space between the home’s perfectly trimmed bushes. Soobin pursed his lips together, pushing his large glasses further up the bridge of his nose—a nervous tick of his. Felix groaned, rolling his eyes. “Or you can leave it out in the open so it’ll spit more oil on the passersby? Is that what you want?”

“Fine, fine!” Soobin huffed, wheeling his bike over to the shrubbery, chains squeaking all the way. He carefully laid it beneath the brush and moved a few branches to cover it up nicely. He stood up straight, dusting his hands on the front of his loose blue jeans. “What about your skateboard?”

Felix gave the board a pat, awarding his most prized possession a dazzling smile one would expect to see a proud father giving his beloved son. But in reality, it was the school’s stoner grinning ear to ear at his old, dusty skateboard. “Nightrider stays with me.”

Soobin scrunched his nose, cringing on instinct. He still calls that thing by that stupid name?

Felix clapped him on the shoulder before he could make a remark, catching him off guard when he said, “Right. Let’s go and get your girl.”

There was nothing Soobin could do to stop the flush that rushed to his cheeks right away. Images of you, his ex-best friend and the only reason he had even come to this party in the first place, flashed through his mind. Had he not overheard Yeonjun invite you earlier that morning and then casually mention the encounter to Felix, there was no way he would have even stepped foot out of his house that night. Part of him was peeved, wishing he had never uttered a single word about you to his overbearing friend. Yet, deep down, there was hope within him—the tiniest sliver.

If there was even the slightest chance that he could talk to you that night, he would do anything. Even if it meant dealing with a stupid party, and the never-ceasing teasing he was bound to continue receiving from Felix.

“Don’t even say that,” He said, emphasizing each word as they walked up the front steps. Soobin had to glance down at his much shorter friend to see the devious grin on his freckled face.

“Say what? That she’s your girl, your woman, your one and only?”

The blush must have been creeping to his neck by that point. He could feel it. “I. . .” There were many things Soobin wished to say; angry words that would hopefully shut the blonde skater boy up real quick. But he couldn’t bring himself to say a single harsh word, so he sighed in defeat. “I can’t even say it.”

“That you hate me?” Felix only grinned even bigger, and Soobin couldn’t help the tiny defeated smile that slipped over his features. “Oh, I know. It’s because I’m too good of a best friend.”

They stepped into the house then, instantly being overwhelmed by loud music, boisterous laughter, and drunken yells echoing throughout the halls. Soobin latched onto Felix right away, gripping his friend’s sleeve as someone stumbled into him, a bit of beer spilling from their cup. He pushed his glasses up, only for them to slide right back down as he began to sweat.

“Maybe we should go home, Lix!” Soobin shouted to be heard over the noise as they travelled further into the house. “We can always try next year!”

“Stop being a scaredy-cat!” Felix shouted back, and Soobin thought he might actually begin to cry as they squeezed their way into the living room. Soobin nearly gagged at the strong smell of alcohol as it burned in his nose. The scene was nothing short of a nightmare to Soobin—loud voices, smoke rising in the air, vodka assaulting his nose and sweat beading on the back of his neck. He had never been one to drink, and he didn’t plan on starting that night; but he was beginning to understand what Felix meant when he had once told him it was nearly impossible to get through one of these parties sober.

He was about to make another complaint and beg to leave when someone from the crowd hollered his name, causing him to wince when he recognized that voice as the one that belonged to none other than Choi Yeonjun.

“Soobin! Where you been?”

Soobin smiled nervously at the school’s heartthrob—and textbook snobby rich kid—before he turned back to Felix. He didn’t want to leave his friend, but he knew that he would never hear the end of it if he ignored Yeonjun’s persistent calls. “I’ll be right back,” He promised Felix, still holding onto his sleeve.

“No, no,” Felix assured. “You go. You’ll probably find her around that place anyway.”

Soobin wasn’t so sure of that. You were definitely not of the right social standing to be caught amongst the circle of the school’s rich boys—which was why it had surprised Soobin that Yeonjun had invited you to the party in the first place. Your high school had its own caste system, and you were near the bottom of it.

And, as much as it pained him to admit it, Soobin was stuck at the very top with all the other rich snobs who cared about nothing more than their daily allowances that came straight from their daddy’s bank account.

“What about you, buddy?” He asked Felix, desperate for any excuse to remain by his friend’s side. He would have tried to bring Felix with him, but his friend was in an even worse social standing than you were—he was poor, and he was most known for being the school’s pothead. There was no way Soobin would willingly drag him into a situation where nothing but slander and torment awaited him.

“Me?” Felix shrugged, gripping his board tighter. “I’ll just smoke away the night.”

Soobin pouted, glancing back at the group of preps as they called for him once again. He sighed, clapping Felix on the shoulder. “Just make sure you won’t smell too much of it when I come back.”

Submitting himself to his doom then, he turned on his heel and slowly made his way to where the group of boys sat near the sofa, giving them a half-hearted wave.

“Why were you hanging around that Felix guy?” Yeonjun asked once Soobin had reached their circle. “Did he blackmail you or something?”

Soobin frowned, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “He’s my friend.”

Yeonjun rolled his eyes, brushing a hand through his perfectly-straightened ebony locks. “Sure he is. Tell me, do you see every kid you find on the streets as some sort of personal charity project? Or is it just Felix and—what was her name—” He snapped his fingers then before he said, “Y/N, right?”

Soobin didn’t respond—well, it was more like he couldn’t respond. By nature he was a very passive being, but nothing drew him closer to bouts of anger than when the people he cared about were being insulted right before him.

Especially when it came to you.

Yet, as much as he wanted to tell Yeonjun off or give him a nice shove into the smoke-stained walls, words failed him. They always did. Perhaps this was why you had abandoned him all those years ago. Nobody knew him better than you did, so of course you were able to see what he truly was beneath all the expensive clothes and nervous laughter—a coward.

He figured that he’d probably have left himself too.

“Drink up, buttercup.” The chipper voice that belonged to the other Choi in the small gathering of socialites, Choi Beomgyu, thrust a plastic red cup towards Soobin’s chest.

He shook his head, throwing another wavering smile in his direction. “No thanks. I don’t drink.”

Yeonjun rolled his eyes. “Of course you don’t. Why are you even here then?”

Once again, Soobin chose silence as his only response. He swallowed, patting the front pocket of his denim jacket. As the group of boys began conversing once more, he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander around the room, searching every drunken face for the features that belonged to you, trying to hear your name in every conversation, desperate for your voice to break through the blasting music and shouting voices.

“Who ya looking for there, Big Choi?” Soobin grimaced at the nickname. He was skinny, but incredibly tall, and nobody would let him forget that. “Big Choi” was one of his most common nicknames among the elitists. He despised it, but of course, he would never voice that aloud.

He glanced at Beomgyu and smiled nervously again, shaking his head. “Nobody.”

His eyes met Yeonjun’s and he gulped yet again as the latter eyed him with suspicion. It wasn’t as though he had anything to hide, but something about Yeonjun’s calculating gaze made his skin crawl.

He needed to escape. Just for a moment, at least.

“I’ll be right back. Going to find some water.”

He slipped out of the living room then, apologizing profusely to each couple he accidentally bumped into, bowing in remorse to each person’s toes his big feet happened to stumble over. He ached to be by Felix’s side—the stoned skateboarder had become somewhat of a security blanket to the taller of the duo—but his blonde friend was nowhere to be seen.

After snagging a bottle of water from the kitchen, Soobin managed to slip into an empty bathroom. He slammed the door shut and wasted no time in locking it. Letting out the biggest sigh of relief, he closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the door, taking a big gulp of the ice cold water.

He set the bottle on the counter and carefully reached into the front pocket of his jacket, his fingers finding the piece of paper he had been storing there all evening. He pulled it out and let his eyes wander over his middle school creation. It was a big heart, cut out from a scrap piece of red construction paper. Scrawled across it in his eight-grade handwriting were the words, Be mine this Valentine’s! His name was etched at the bottom, and at the very top, delicately printed in hot pink glitter glue, your name was written as well.

He had planned to give this to you four years ago on Valentine’s day. Everything had been planned out perfectly; he was to pick you up on his old, trusty bike. It wasn’t really made for two people, but the two of you had fashioned a makeshift extra seat for you to sit upon whenever you went places together.

He wanted to take you to the Dairy Shack, which was the local ice cream shop where the two of you spent the most time together. You always got a large chocolate shake to share, playing a quick game of rock, paper, scissors to decide who got to eat the cherry on top. He was going to order a shake and specially ask for two cherries that time, and planned to give both of them to you before he would bravely present you with the handmade card he had spent all day working on.

However, when he waited for you outside your house that day, the red dusk turned to pitch black night, and you never stepped foot out your door.

He had even gone up to your door a few times and knocked, but there was no answer. Eventually he pedalled off into the night, back to his house. He was disappointed, of course, but more worried than anything else. He had hoped you weren’t sick.

But when he saw you at school the next day, he knew that hadn’t been the case.

And when you ignored him calling your name as you passed by him in the hallways, he knew that something had drastically changed.

For weeks, Soobin was in great turmoil as he replayed your last few encounters together before you had stood him up. Perhaps you were angry that he had won the last few games of rock, paper, scissors? If he had known, he would have given you all the cherries for the rest of time if it meant you would still talk to him. He didn’t care about them—he cared about you.

He missed you.

And as weeks turned to months, and months turned to years, you still barely spoke to him, and he missed you more and more. The best friend he had wanted to take a step closer to had taken a thousand steps back from him, and he still had no idea why.

But that night, he was determined to find out.

Well, if he could muster up the courage to get a single word out, of course.

He folded the heart back up and stuck it back in his pocket, taking a deep breath as he observed himself in the fogged-up mirror. He fixed his bright blue hair that Felix had helped him bleach and dye, making sure the pieces fell over the corners of his eyes just right. He straightened his white turtleneck and cuffed the sleeves of his denim jacket until he was at least somewhat content with his appearance.

“You can do this, Soobs,” He told himself, adjusting his big round glasses further up the bridge of his nose. “That’s what Felix would say.”

“Hey, rich boy!” A loud scream came from outside the bathroom door, accompanied by harsh knocking that sent Soobin stumbling backwards until he fell in the shower, pulling the curtains down with him.

“Hurry up in there! I’m about to piss myself!”

Soobin let out a shaky sigh, scrambling to his feet as he rushed to fix the curtain he had torn down with his clumsiness. “Sorry,” he mumbled, though he doubted the person on the other side of the door could hear him.

He realized then with an ever growing dread that it would be a miracle if he survived the night long enough to even find you, but it would take the work of God himself for him to actually speak to you.

He figured it was time for him to start praying.

YOU KNEW IT WAS A MISTAKE TO LET JEN DO YOUR MAKEUP.

When she had stopped you on your way out the door with a compact of bright purple eyeshadow, you had turned her down right away. No way in all of creation were you walking in a party with such an atrocious color caked up to your brow bone.

“How can you say it’s gonna look bad if you haven’t even let me try?” Jen had asked.

You had given her a once-over, your lips pressed into a thin line. “If it’s gonna look anything like the way you do your own makeup, I’m gonna have to pass.”

After that snide remark, she had threatened to fire you if you didn’t let her apply the makeup. And so you obliged, though you didn’t have much of a choice.

The booming sounds of the party hit your ears before you had even reached the lawn. Screaming teens—well, there were probably some adults thrown in there as well—and the sound of music spilled through the open windows of the home. Couples and singles alike were scattered throughout the perfectly kept lawn that was now littered with empty cups and other assortments of garbage.

You looked down at your patchwork jeans and pink sweater, certain that you would be underdressed compared to the rest of the partygoers. But from the looks of things, as you carefully squeezed your way through the front door and into the home, everyone was probably too wasted to even notice your arrival, let alone care about your looks.

You caught a glimpse of your face in the hallway mirror, cringing at the sight of your eyeshadow. You had tried to wipe some of it away before arriving, but it simply smudged, giving you quite the shocking smoky, purple eye look. For someone who didn’t even know the difference between a paintbrush and a makeup brush, it was a bold look, to say the least.

If Soobin saw you looking like this, he’d probably have a heart attack.

Soobin.

In the midst of all your frantic preparation, you had nearly forgotten about the main reason why you had planned to avoid this party at all costs. With a quick glance around the room, you realized that he was nowhere to be seen. You wouldn’t have been surprised if he hadn’t shown up at all. He was never a fan of parties, anyway.

You crossed your arms over your chest and slowly slipped past the couples crowding the hallway with their limbs intertwined, mouths practically swallowing one another whole, until you reached the living room. Surprisingly, it was less crowded in here than you thought it might be. A few minglers were scattered about the room’s perimeter, but they all kept away from the center of the room, which was occupied by none other than Choi Yeonjun and all his brainless, rich-boy worshippers. You quickly scanned the group, not able to make out Soobin among them. When you realized he wasn’t there, you were partly relieved and partly disappointed. If was to be anywhere at this party, it would probably be with these guys.

With a quick turn on your heel, you planned to make your way out of the living room before Yeonjun could see you. The last thing you wanted was for the boy with a bruised ego to see you, regardless of whether or not he had been the one to invite you.

“Y/N? You came?”

Too late.

Plastering a forced grin to your face, you slowly turned to face Yeonjun, who had just called your name. He was eyeing you with slight surprise, but soon, a smirk slipped across his lips as he motioned for you to come over. You had to hold back your sigh, wishing there was some way for you to get out of this situation. It was all Jen’s fault that you had to show up in the first place. You decided you were going to demand an extra ten cents be added to your raise the next time you saw your pushy boss.

“Hey Yeonjun,” you said once you had walked over to him. “I figured I’d stop by for a minute or two, since you were kind enough to invite me.”

He smirked, glancing at a few of his friends. They shared a knowing laugh with one another, but the meaning of it was lost to you. You wanted nothing more than to get away from them, but that wasn’t an option.

“You’re too busy to go out with me to a basketball game but free enough to come to a party, huh?” He asked.

You blinked, digging your nails into your arms. “I’m sorry?”

“It’s fine, really,” He drawled, swirling his plastic cup of beer in his hand. “You didn’t think I’d be upset or anything did you? I only asked you out because I was dared to shack up with you. But I’m guessing you already knew that, since you’re so smart and all.”

Your eyes went wide, but you managed to control the rest of your expression. It was just like you had guessed—Yeonjun had invited you to the party with the sole purpose of making a scene.

If you survived the night, Jen was never going to hear the end of it.

“You’re not gonna say anything?” He asked, pushing himself to his feet. You could tell by the slight stumble in his step and his hooded eyes that he had quite a bit to drink. He took a step towards you, causing you to back up immediately. Your back hit the wall, and you placed your palms against it as Yeonjun towered over you.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. I know why you’re here anyways.” He leaned forward, his lips hovering near your ear. “You’re here to see Soobin, aren’t you? Since he’s the only one here willing to waste his time on filth like you.”

Your blood boiled, and you had to clench your fists at your sides to control your anger.

“Don’t,” You seethed, “Call me that.”

“Call you what? Filth? Or sweetheart? Why, is that something good old Binnie used to call you—”

He never got to finish that sentence, because with one big burst of anger, you stomped on his toe as hard as you could with your worn-out platform sneaker.

“What the hell!” He screeched, drawing the attention of several others in the room. His outburst even caused a few of the couples to pull away from each other’s faces long enough to eavesdrop.

Before you could even say anything back, lukewarm liquid was splashed up in your face, burning your eyes and nose. You gasped, running your hands over your eyes to see Yeonjun with his now empty cup of beer pointed towards you.

“Think twice before you act out against me next time, sweetheart. Never forget your place.”

Tears of anger burned in your eyes, and you scanned the room to see several people exchanging whispers and giggles as they glanced in your direction. You pushed past Yeonjun and quickly made your way out the back door of the house, unable to stand the humiliation for a moment longer.

Soobin arrived in the living room just in time to see you leave.

He wasted no time in rushing towards Yeonjun, grabbing hold of his arm. “Yeonjun, was that Y/N?” He asked, eyes quickly taking in the puddle of alcohol on the floor and the empty cup in Yeonjun’s hand. “What happened?”

“Nothing you need to worry your pretty blue head about, Big Choi. I just put her in her place is all.”

Soobin’s eyes narrowed. “What do you mean you ‘put her in her place?’”

Yeonjun laughed, giving Soobin a nonchalant pat on the back. “Just drop it, would you? It has nothing to do with you.”

“What did you say, Yeonjun?”

Yeonjun was growing irritated now. He huffed out a breath, crossing his arms over his chest. “I said it has nothing to do with you, Soobin. I know you like to hang around people like that pothead Felix, but the rest of us live in the real world, where we’d rather not waste our time with those who have no future anyways. I bet he’s the one that got you to dye your hair that god awful blue, isn’t he?”

Soobin bit the inside of his cheek. He so badly wished to rip Yeonjun to shreds then and there. If he had Felix’s courage, the cocky bastard would have been knocked to the ground ages ago. But if there was one thing Soobin was sure he could never be, it was brave. And so, despite his rage, he remained silent, his eyes practically burning a hole through Yeonjun’s chest from how intently he was glaring.

It seemed as though Yeonjun was about to say something, but his eyes landed on the bit of red that peeked through the front pocket of Soobin’s denim jacket. Before Soobin had time to defend himself, Yeonjun had reached forward and snatched it from his pocket, revealing the large paper heart—his valentine for you.

“So this is why you care so much,” Yeonjun said, laughing as his eyes scanned the glittery words that decorated the page. “You want her to be your valentine.”

“Give that back,” Soobin said quietly, his hands beginning to shake.

Yeonjun instead lifted his eyes to Soobin, gave him a sickly sweet grin, and ripped the heart straight down the middle. He let the two pieces fall from his hands to the ground, and with them Soobin’s heart went also.

“You’re really willing to try and go against me, and for what? For the sake of a girl who can’t even afford a new pair of jeans and a boy that smokes his life away in the bathroom stalls?” Yeonjun took a slow step towards Soobin, his eyes glinting with a sinister determination. “You may be rich, Soobin, but if you choose to lower yourself to their standards, you may as well be dirt poor just like they are.”

With his hands clenched into tight fists, his glasses sliding down his nose, and his heart quite literally in two pieces on the floor below him, Soobin decided that he had had enough.

“I’d much rather be associated with people who are kind and have actual depth to their character than be lumped together with a bunch of pricks like you with no real personality—because that’s something you can’t buy with daddy’s paycheck.”

He had to physically restrain himself from slapping his hand across his own mouth in shock. It was as if the spirit of Felix himself had possessed him to say such harsh things. He wondered where Felix was then, wishing more than ever before to have his best friend by his side as he began to tremble from either the rush of adrenaline that coursed through his veins, or from fear. Or perhaps it was both.

He didn’t have time to ponder it any longer before Yeonjun’s fist collided with his nose, resulting in a sickening crack as pain echoed throughout his face in tidal waves.

He stumbled backward as people began to shout, raising his hand to his nose and gasping when he saw that his palm was covered in blood.

Beomgyu had his arms wrapped around Yeonjun, who was desperately trying to lunge towards Soobin once again.

“Knock it off, Yeonjun!” Beomgyu shouted, pushing the elder back. “His dad is on the school board! Are you trying to get expelled?”

Beomgyu looked over his shoulder at the still stunned Soobin, who was gaping at the blood that now stained his once white turtleneck.

“Get lost, Soobin,” Beomgyu said, to which Soobin only blinked in reply, his ears ringing.

“Now!”

Head spinning, Soobin picked up the two halves of his paper heart, stuffed them into his jeans, and stumbled out the same door he had seen you go through just minutes before. After checking to make sure his glasses were still intact—they were, thankfully—he shook his head in an effort to clear his mind of the static, eyes scanning the front lawn looking for any trace of you.

It didn’t take long for his eyes to spot you among the now dwindling crowd of partygoers. Your bright pink sweater stood out against the darkness, so he was able to recognize you even with your back towards him. He sniffed, wiping the back of his hand against his dripping nose as he slowly made his way to where you sat on the curb, your feet planted on the asphalt street. He wished that he looked a bit more presentable—when he played this scene out in his head over the years in which he would finally reunite with you, he never imagined himself dazed and covered in blood.

Desperate times called for desperate measures, he supposed.

When he reached you, he simply stood beside you in silence for a moment, unsure of what to say. He could tell that you sensed his presence, but you refused to look up at him as you kept your face buried in your hands. He could have sworn he heard a few muffled sobs slip through your fingers, but of course, he wasn’t going to bring that up.

Eventually he decided to slip his jacket off of his shoulders, leaning down to drape it over you. You still kept your head down as he sat beside you on the curb, but he watched you grip the jacket and pull it tighter around your body. He smiled a bit, holding the collar of his turtleneck against his throbbing nose.

“Thank you,” you muttered, wiping your hand across your eyes. You finally looked over at him, and when you did, you couldn’t hold back your gasp. “My God Soobin, what happened to your face?”

“Oh, well, I might have gotten punched,” He said quickly, trying to wave off your concern. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Punched? By who?”

He looked down at the ground, sniffing as a drop of blood hit the pavement. “Yeonjun,” he muttered under his breath.

“I’m sorry, did you just say Yeonjun? Are you insane? Why on earth would you butt heads with the Choi Yeonjun?”

Soobin didn’t say anything in response, he simply stared at you, eyes wide with beer dripping off the ends of your hair, makeup smeared across your face, your sweater stained down the front. It didn’t seem to take long for you to put the pieces together, as the shock left your face and was replaced with something akin to guilt.

“Oh,” You said, looking back down at your shoes.

“So she knows that I did it all for her,” Soobin thought.

For some reason, the idea of that both terrified and excited him.

A second later, he glanced over to see you ripping one of the hand-sewed patches of fabric off your jeans, leaving a square of your skin exposed to the chilly night air. You leaned towards him, pushing his hand away from his nose so you could use the patch to clean up some of the blood on and around his puffy red nose.

“Y/N, your pants!” He exclaimed, trying to push your hand away. “They’re ruined!”

“I’m not worried about my pants, you idiot,” You said, swatting his hand away as you continued to press the cloth against his skin. “You got punched in the face because of me, this is the least I could do.”

“That was my choice though,” He muttered, although he stopped trying to resist your touch. He ignored the way his heart thrummed harder in his chest, hoping that you couldn’t hear.

“Well, this is my choice too.” Your eyes flicked to his for a brief moment, your bottom lip pulled between your teeth. “Why did you do it, by the way?”

“Do what?”

“Stand up to Yeonjun for me and get a nasty nosebleed as a result.”

“Oh.” He blinked slowly, keeping his eyes fixed on yours. “Just ‘cause.”

“Because . . . ?”

“Because of you.” He blurted, causing your hand to go still against him. He swallowed his fear, braving the best smile that he could. “Just you. That was my only reason.”

You didn’t say anything as your hand fell from his face, the cloth clutched between your fingers. The anxiety he had tried his best to suppress came rushing up all at once, and he was surprised that his ears didn’t begin to squeal like a tea kettle from all the pressure.

“Y/N,” He said, gently placing his hand over yours despite how his fingers trembled. “Why did you pull away from me?”

“What?”

“Four years ago. Why did you stop talking to me?”

You were quiet for a moment, digging into the ground with the toe of your sneaker. Soobin held his breath until you finally replied with, “I was afraid.”

“Afraid? Of what?”

“We were getting older, Binnie,” You said, and his heart skipped at the use of your old nickname for him. “You and I, we’re from very different walks of life. You get to hang out with people like Yeonjun, whereas I get a cup of beer poured all over my face just for existing, and you get a fist to the nose for trying to stand up for me. We’re from different sides of the track, one might say.”

“So?” Soobin asked, his hand tightening around yours. “Did you really think that would affect us that much, Y/N?”

You frowned, glancing down at his hand over yours.

“I thought you’d be embarrassed of me,” You said, your voice barely above a whisper.

“Embarrassed?” Soobin’s eyes went wide as he gripped your hand tighter still, pulling it into his lap. “Y/N, I would never, ever be embarrassed of you. Besides, have you seen my best friend? He’s on a first name basis with the principal because of how often he gets written up for smoking behind the school. If I’m not embarrassed of him, why would I ever be embarrassed of you?”

You laughed, wiping the back of your hand across your eyes once more. “I guess I was worried about nothing, huh?” You sniffed, giving his hand a squeeze. “I’m sorry, Soobin.”

He shook his head, squeezing your hand right back. “Don’t apologize. You’re here now, that’s what matters. Do think we could—you know—”

“Pick up where we left off?” You smiled, nodding vigorously. “I’d like that very much, Binnie.”

He beamed then, almost pinching himself to be sure that he was not dreaming, but the pain in his nose was real enough to remind him of that on its own. He jumped to his feet, pulling you right up with him.

“In that case, how about we finally go on that Valentine’s date I had planned all the way back then?”

“Date?” You asked, a brow raised. “Is it really considered a date if two friends are just hanging out?”

He didn’t respond as he pulled you along behind him towards the bushes where he and Felix had hidden his bike. He crouched down and moved the branches aside, feeling his heart drop to his stomach when he realized that his bike was, in fact, no longer there.

He shot up, turning to face you with eyes wide. “Felix—that bastard took my bike!”

You were quiet for a moment, but then, you burst into boisterous laughter, leaving Soobin utterly confused.

“It’s not funny, Y/N!” He whined, shoving your shoulder lightly. “I was supposed to take you to the Dairy Shack on my bike!”

“It is funny,” You said between bursts of laughter. “Only you would get such a rusty old piece of metal stolen from you.”

He pushed his lips out in a pout, sliding his glasses up his sore nose. “It’s a good bike, don’t make fun of it.”

You grinned, interlocking his fingers with yours, which was enough to instantly wipe the pout right off his face.

“Let’s just walk, Binnie. The Dairy Shack isn’t that far anyways.”

You were right; the walk to your favorite milkshake place was very close to the house where the party had occurred. Although Felix stealing his bike had thrown an obvious wrench in his plans, it was a minor hiccup, and one he could most definitely handle. Besides, he wouldn’t have to see Felix until the next day anyways. He could deal with his frustration then.

At least, that’s what he thought anyways, until the two of you spotted Felix at the skatepark on your way to the dairy shack.

Soobin’s eyes took in the deplorable sight before him—from where he stood on the dimly lit sidewalk, he could see Felix and a girl he had never seen before, their faces nearly pressed together, and most importantly, with his bike discarded a few yards away from them.

“Soobin,” You said, tugging on his arm. “They look like they’re busy, let’s just go—”

But Soobin, who had little patience when it came to Felix messing up his plans, didn’t let you finish before he screamed, “Give me back my freaking bike!”

You had to hold back your snort of laughter at his choice of words. Even when he was trying to sound angry, he was undeniably adorable.

Soobin watched as Felix startled, clutching his spliff between his fingers as he glared daggers back at his friend. Soobin gulped, trying not to let his fear show on his face. What did he have to be afraid of, anyways? He was the victim of thievery, and his best friend was the offender.

Felix took a big step towards him, but he paused, his eyes landing on your interlocked hands. Soobin glanced down as well, his face growing furiously warm as he realized the situation he had gotten himself into.

He decided to divert the subject before it could even be brought up by saying, “I can’t believe you stole my bike! All this time I was trying to hide it from strangers, but you, my best friend! I should’ve been hiding it from you!”

Soobin noticed Felix’s female companion step off the skateboard and walk over in his direction, and for a second he felt bad for possibly ruining her night with his best friend. However, his frustration was more prominent in the moment as he fixed his gaze back on his best friend, who had fixed a mischievous smirk upon his face that made warning sirens blare in Soobin’s head right away.

“Now, now, buddy,” Felix said, his voice calm and carefree as ever. It probably had something to do with what he had just smoked, but Soobin didn’t care all that much. “You’re just gonna have to let me borrow it for a little longer.”

Soobin nearly laughed at the audacity of such a statement. “You are gonna give me the bike, or—”

“How about this, Soobs?” Soobin’s lips clamped shut at his friend’s interruption, as the thief in question gestured with his joint to where Soobin’s fingers were locked with yours. “You let me keep your bike for the night, and I don’t tell your dad about you hanging out with the opposite gender.”

Unable to control yourself, you let out a big laugh. Soobin would have felt betrayed, but he was more terrified than anything else at the idea of his father finding out that he was taking a girl out without his permission. He would be grounded for weeks—no, months.

“You wouldn’t.”

Felix’s lips curled up even more into a twisted grin that Soobin wished he had the guts to slap off his face. “God, just imagine the look on Mr. Choi’s face. Imagine him finding out about your premarital hand holding.”

No. Not the hand holding.

Soobin almost felt faint, but he steeled himself to the best of his abilities as he cleared his throat. “One night, Lix,” he warned. “If I don’t see it on my porch in the morning, you’ll be sorry!”

“Oh, I’m so scared,” Felix teased. His expression changed a moment later though, when he finally noticed Soobin’s swollen nose and blood-stained turtleneck. “Wait, Soobs, the hell happened to you?”

Soobin, however, had already taken his first steps away from the skatepark, pulling you along behind him. “I’ll tell you later, bud. Enjoy your spliff with that kind girl who you probably don’t deserve!”

“Hey!”

Soobin couldn’t help but laugh as he swung your interlocked hands together, grinning as you let out a laugh as well. The anger that had seeped through him seemed to melt away in an instant as the two of you continued your journey to the Dairy Shack.

“Would your dad really be that upset if he found out about this?” You asked.

Soobin grimaced. “We should probably wait til next year to tell him about this outing. Or maybe the year after that.”

When the two of you had finally reached the Dairy Shack, you waited outside for him while he went in to order your drink. A large chocolate milkshake, with two straws, just like you used to get every time before.

When he had the drink in hand, he walked back outside and sat down beside you on the curb, smiling as you wrapped his jacket tighter around your shoulders. You smiled back up at him, your eyes creasing from the expression. Your smile had always struck him right to his core; he had missed seeing it every day.

He hoped he could see it every morning and every night from that day onward. There was no way he would let you go this time.

He just had to muster up the courage to grab hold of you first.

“You know what, Binnie, you turned out to be a lot taller than I thought you ever would be,” you said as you took one of the straws from his hands. “You’re actually enormous. It’s shocking.”

“Should I find that offensive? It sounds kinda like an insult.”

“Take it however you will,” You teased, leaning over as he popped the plastic lid off the milkshake. He grabbed the cherry by the stem and held it towards you.

“What are you doing?” You asked, holding out your fist. “We have to rock, paper, scissors for it. Remember?”

Soobin laughed as he shook his head. “I’m giving it to you this time. It’s what I planned to do all those years ago, when I asked you to hang out on Valentine’s.”

You seemed to be taken aback, but you simply shrugged as you plucked the cherry from his hand and pulled it from the stem with your teeth, glancing back over at him. It was silent for a moment, but then your eyes landed on the pocket of his jeans, where you could see a bit of red paper poking out. You leaned over even further, reaching your hand out to snatch the paper.

“What are you—hey! Give that back!”

Soobin desperately tried to take his Valentine back from you, but it was too late. You held both halves of what used to be a whole in your hands, your eyes scanning the words as you pieced them together.

“Soobin . . .”

He held his breath. Had his act of young love left you completely speechless? Were you so touched that you would burst into tears?

“This looks like a middle schooler made it.”

He let out the breath in the form of a long, long sigh.

“That’s because it was made by a middle schooler,” He said as he set the milkshake down beside him. “I made it back in the eighth grade. I planned to give it to you that Valentine’s.”

“Oh.” You ran your finger along the card’s surface, the smallest smile creeping across your lips. “Well in that case, it’s not half bad. Why’s it ripped though?”

“Ah—well, Yeonjun . . .”

You nodded, taking another glance at his swollen nose. “No need to elaborate. It seems you had a lot planned for our Valentine’s Day back then. Is there anything else you wanted to do?”

His mouth went dry at that, and he wished that you couldn’t see his face because he was sure that his expression was quite comical. All the way back then, four years prior, he had in fact planned the perfect, ideal day in his head. Picking you up on his bike, giving you the cherry from his milkshake, and presenting you with his hand made card.

There was only one thing left on his list.

He didn’t move at first, willing himself to have enough courage to even look back in your direction. But when he finally did allow his eyes to meet yours, he felt his shoulders relax and his heart rate became more manageable.

He took a deep breath, leaned forward, and pressed his lips against your cheek.

He lingered there for only a moment before he pulled back, daring to pry one of his eyes open to take in the look on your face.

The disappointment was palpable—from the way your brows furrowed together and the way you pursed your lips. His stomach dropped, and he scooted the tiniest bit away from you.

“I’m sorry,” He blurt out, his face growing warmer by the second. “I shouldn’t have done that, I just—”

“Is that all?”

Your question stopped him mid-ramble, his eyes growing wide. “Huh?”

“Is that all?” You repeated, closing the distance between you that he had created. “It’s Valentine’s Day, Soobin. I think we can do better than a peck on the cheek.”

The implications of what you were saying didn’t register with him right away, but when it finally did, he could have sworn his heart began to beat loud enough for the entire town to hear. His hand curled into a fist as he gripped the denim of his jeans. He leaned forward, keeping his eyes open just enough to watch you as he brought his lips closer to yours. He could feel your eyes on him all the while, causing his heart to pound fiercer still within him.

When he was just a breath away, he whispered, “Can you close your eyes?”

“Hm?”

He lifted his hand, gently placing it over your eyes. He leaned closer then, filling the space between you both as his lips met yours. You tasted vaguely of cherry and strawberry slice soda, and he found it quite nice the way his lips seemed to fit perfectly against your own. As the seconds drew on, your hands slipped around his neck, pulling him closer. He slowly let his hand fall from your eyes, tracing lines with the tips of his fingers down your cheek before he cradled your jaw, letting his lips part just enough to taste the sweet sugar on your lips once more.

He thought in a haze that it was a good thing he didn’t drink anything at the party, as kissing you was proving to be intoxicating enough on its own.

When you finally pulled away, leaving your forehead resting against his, he let his eyes flutter open enough to see the euphoric smile that adorned your features. He grinned as well, gently running his thumb against your cheek.

“I think that back then, I had planned to ask you this before kissing you,” He whispered, “But Y/N, will you be my Valentine?”

Instead of a spoken answer, you laughed, leaning forward to capture his lips with yours once again, and that was the only answer Choi Soobin would ever need.

WHEN SOOBIN ARRIVED HOME THAT NIGHT, HE WENT STRAIGHT FOR THE TELEPHONE.

It was kept upstairs at night right outside his parent’s door, to keep himself and his brother from using it in the late hours. Of course, this never stopped Soobin from sneaking it downstairs to his room in the basement to make late night calls to Felix.

And that particular evening, he really needed to give Felix an update.

He grabbed the phone from the small table in the hallway, carefully tiptoeing towards the basement stairs. Before he had even taken the first step down, the bathroom door creaked open. Soobin whipped his head around to see his brother Kai standing there, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he raised a brow at his older brother.

Soobin froze, blinking slowly as he realized the incriminating situation he found himself in.

“Please don’t tell mom,” He whispered, his eyes pleading with his younger brother.

Kai nodded, although Soobin wasn’t quite convinced that the boy was even coherent enough to understand what was going on. Soobin offered a rushed thank you, and ventured his first step down the stairs.

Well, he tried, anyways, and ended up missing the first step. He tumbled down the rest of the stairs, landing on his butt at the very end.

He winced in pain, glad to see that the phone was still intact in his hands. He glanced over his shoulders to see Kai staring down the stairway with wide eyes, his lips parted in shock. Soobin quickly put a finger to his lips, begging his brother for silence.

Kai simply shook his head and walked away, allowing Soobin the freedom to breathe out a sigh of relief.

He quickly ran to his bedroom and shut the door, collapsing onto his bed with the phone as his breaths came in ragged gasps as an aftereffect from his tumble down the stairs. He figured he should have dialed Felix’s number right away, but he couldn’t help but brush his fingers against his lips, remembering the feeling and taste of having yours pressed against them.

He was so caught up in his daze that he didn’t notice Felix calling until the third ring.

He picked it up, breathing heavily into the speaker as he rubbed a sore spot on his lower back.

“Please tell me that panting is from running a marathon, and not what I think you’ve successfully tried.”

Soobin nearly gagged, holding the phone away from his face as he coughed, flustered by his friend's crude words. He brought the phone back to his face and said, “No, you sicko, I just fell down the stairs.”

“How the hell did you manage that with those long legs?”

“That’s not important, Lix!” He laid back onto his pillows then, twirling the phone cord in his hands as he stared up at his ceiling, the memories of his adventure with you that night flooding his mind once more. He couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear as he said, “Look, I need to tell you something important.”

If he didn’t know any better, he would have thought that he could hear the smile in Felix’s voice too as his friend replied.

“Well buddy, I got something to tell you too.”

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hihellogoodbyebruh · 5 years ago

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Is She the Reason?

Pairing: Angel Reyes x Black!Reader

Summary: Angel has been distant lately and Y/N discovers the reason why.

Warning(s): Foul language, angst, cheating :(

Word count: 1,831

Author’s Note: I’ve been in a sad mood so this kind of came out of that. Plus of course the Destiny’s Child song of the same title was inspiration. There is kind of a prequel in my docs that may get posted in the future. We shall see. Also the text in the gif isn’t relevant, I just needed sad Angel. Questions, comments, and concerns are always welcome. My inbox is open. Enjoy!

Part 2

The MC was dealing with a very busy couple of weeks. With the Galindos now working with Rebels, the Mayans were needed to help facilitate the relationship incognito. Angel had a position now so his responsibilities were even greater and you’d seen him less and less. He used to call and text frequently, but you stopped receiving those all the time as well. Something felt wrong, but you chalked it up to him just being busy. You missed just being in his arms and seeing that annoyingly sexy smile on his face. You knew the guys were running day in and day out so you wanted to do something for them. With the help of Chucky, you organized a special dinner for everyone. You knew it could get interrupted with urgent club news, but you had to try.

With meat provided by Pops and sides prepared by you, the boys practically had a feast laid out in the middle of the clubhouse. You had come to really care about all members of the club. Your father was a retired police captain who always had a soft spot for the club. He was actually friends with Bishop and Marcus. You’d known them all your life. Of course EZ, Coco, and Gilly had a special place in your heart because of their closeness to Angel. They became like brothers to you quickly. EZ was the baby brother with the gentle soul, Coco was the wild one, and Gilly was just so damn lovable. They were the perfect balances for Angel and you were so happy he had them in his life.

As you finished making sure everything was laid out to perfection, you heard the rumblings of engines outside.

“They’re here!” Chucky excitedly declared and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yes I can hear that Chucky. Start opening some beers up, yeah?” You suggested and he nodded his head as he followed instructions. You had just made your way from behind the bar when the doors opened.

“Something smells good as fuck in here. No way Chucky cooked.” Bishop stated as he walked in with Taza and Loza behind him.

“Absolutely not. I love y’all too much for that. I figured you busy men deserved a nice home cooked meal. Dig in, Jefe.” You announced, smiling at them. Obispo was like a second father to you. Your father and him had developed a highly unlikely friendship that was still strong after all these years. They played cards every week.

“Gracias, chica.” Bishop replied, placing a paternal kiss on the side of your head before walking towards where Chucky had beers lined out.

You were greeted and hugged by the rest of the gang, with Coco and Gilly pulling up the rear.

“You cooked, Y/N? Please tell me you made mac and cheese.” Coco asked, with the closest thing to a pout on his face that you’d ever see.

“Nope. Not this time.” You lied, just to see his and Gilly’s faces dropped. It was so funny.

“I’m just playing. Of course I-” You couldn’t even finish your sentence because Gilly and Coco were racing each other to get to the pan first.

“Y’all better share!” You yelled after them, laughing and shaking your head before heading towards the door. Angel hadn’t been inside yet so you figured he was outside talking to EZ. You had on your favorite pair of jeans that hugged your ass just how he liked it and you had recently taken down your braids to let your natural hair breathe. You had a fresh twist out and you knew your tight curls bouncy and shining in the sunlight.

As you stepped outside, you spotted Angel immediately. He was leaning against the side of the opened van door speaking with a woman sitting down on the van’s floor. You tried not to let yourself be the jealous type. Angel was a very attractive man that often had girls trying to holla at him. He never seemed to entertain them. Nah, it wasn’t the fact that he was talking to a woman that bothered you. It’s the way he was talking to her.

He was completely engrossed by her. You could only see his profile but you recognized the softness in his face. It’s the same look he would give to you. The look that had you feeling like you were the center of his universe. Your breath caught in your throat as you watched the genuine smile that spread across his face as he became amused at something the woman said. You watched his hand run up her forearm and give it a gentle squeeze. There was nothing overtly sexual happening, but the intimacy of it all broke your heart.

The woman wasn’t someone familiar to you. At first. But then you spotted the unique tattoo on her neck. You had heard that tattoo described before. Adelita. The rebel leader. She was beautiful. There was a quiet power to her that almost pulled you in. All of the dots began connecting in your head. All those times he mentioned Adelita and how smart she was, how brave she was, what a badass she was. You thought it was just respect, but now you see it’s more than that. Something was going on between them.

Noise caught your attention and from your peripheral you spotted EZ coming out from his RV. You watched him assess the situation in seconds flat. You turned your head to make eye contact with him and the sad smile on his face, the apology written clear as day there, took your breath away. You felt a tear slide down your face and you turned around to quickly wipe it away.

When you turned back around, EZ had walked over and broken up the conversation. Angel finally turned around and saw you there. You could have swore you saw a quick flash of guilt cross his face before he walked over to you.

“Hey querida.” He kissed your forehead and pulled you into a hug.

Even with your confusion, heartbreak, and anger you couldn’t help completely folding into the hug. Your arms wrapped tightly around his waist and you found yourself inhaling his scent. “Hi.” You breathed out as you finally pulled back from the hug.

“Hey Y/N/N, what are you doing here?” EZ asked, giving you a one armed squeeze.

“I cooked dinner for y’all. There’s plenty inside. Even for your friend here.” You mentioned, with a nod in the woman’s direction. “Except maybe the mac and cheese if someone didn’t stop Coco and Gilly from being hogs.”

“Gracias,” Adelita told you before walking inside the clubhouse with EZ. You watched as Angel watched her for a second before dragging his eyes back to you. There was a silence between y’all before you broke it.

“Is she the reason?” You quietly asked Angel.

“What?”

You scrubbed your hands over your face, trying to hold yourself together. “Is she the reason? The reason you don’t call like you used to? Come around my place like you used to? Or put it on me hard like you used to do?”

“Y/N, it’s not like that.”

“I didn’t ask what it’s like. I asked if she’s the reason that my calls didn't reach you? The deepest of my love couldn’t please you? Tell me the truth right fucking now. I deserve to know.”

There was another silence between y’all as you just stared in his eyes. You were begging, practically pleading with him to tell you that you were wrong. You were putting too much on nothing. That there was no one else… “It wasn’t supposed to be like this.” Angel sighed, and you felt your heart drop into your stomach

“No..no, no, NO fucking dammit Angel!” You shoved him hard, your heartbreak manifesting as anger. “You promised me…”

He stumbled back a little at your push. “I’m so sorry Y/N. We were just working together, but something about her I-”

You cut him off with an angry hiss, “Shut up!” You didn’t want to hear all the things he found so wonderful about her. They didn’t matter. You just started pacing back and forth in front of him. You guys were lucky the yard was closed today and that EZ probably told everyone to stay inside and give y’all space. But honestly, you didn’t even care if you made a scene right now.

“You told me that before you stepped, you’d let me know. You promised you’d tell me if anything changed. You promised to be honest. You promised not to embarrass me. You promised, Angel, you promised…” Your voice broke as the full realization hit you. He’d been carrying out this affair for however long and he didn’t have the decency to tell you. You’ve been worried about him this whole time, but he’s been having himself a great time. You couldn’t stop the tears that flowed.

His eyes closed in guilt and sadness as you started to cry. He never wanted to hurt you. He just got into a situation that spiraled out of control. “Lo siento mucho cariño.”

You just shook your head, unable to believe his words. Unable to believe what was happening. “Before you let me see you with her, you could have told me a change was gonna come. Told me something, anything...but no. How could you let it go this far if you had doubts that I wasn’t the one?”

“I didn’t have any doubts. It didn’t happen like that. I love you, but I just….I can’t explain it.”

“Love? You love me?” You repeated, your voice hoarse and breaking with the word. This wasn’t love. Love should never have so much confusion. Your mind was spinning and you needed to leave. Immediately. “I can’t do this.” You try to walk away but he grabs you.

“Y/N wait, please…” He pleaded, taking your hand and that physical contact caused you to snap.

“GET OFF ME!” You yelled at him, snatching your hand back. All thoughts of not making a scene left your mind. You were reacting from pure hurt. Your scream brought out the men from the clubhouse. “And don’t ever touch me again. We’re done, Angel. We’re so fucking over. You need to get your shit together, but I’m not gonna wait around until you do.”

And then you were rushing to your car and speeding out of the scrap yard. Angel tried his best to keep himself together even as he felt like his heart was beat out of his chest. He wanted to race after you but all he could do was watch you go. He felt someone step up beside him.

“I thought I told you not to be stupid, Angel.” Bishop told him, eyes still on the road your car sped down. He was pissed.

“Bish, I-” Angel started, but was interrupted by Bishop’s fist meeting his mouth. He fell to the ground, wiping at his busted lip.

“Just stay away from her.”

#angel reyes #angel reyes x reader #angel reyes x black!reader #hhgbyebruh fics #is she the reason

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dylanxmin · 5 years ago

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painkiller ∣ 3 ∣ J.HS

breakups are habitual, ordinary maybe even easy for some other people, and maybe it could be easy for you, too, if you haven’t been dumped by your boyfriend after finding out that you were pregnant. no, it wasn’t easy even a bit. and a stranger who wants to be your side doesn’t make this all easy for you, at all.

pairing; jung hoseok x reader

genre; angst, fluff, humor, pregnancy au, strangers to lovers au, single!mom au, slice of life au,,

warnings; angst, swearings, mention of sexual intercourse, bratty taetae, bratty jimin bc why not:), y/n doesn’t like kids?, sorry but unedited:(

word count; 11k+

rating; nc17

a/n; e-yooo? yeah, i take a long, loong break even without wanting it. but can I blame my life and all the thing I tried to handle? (and clearly failing lol),, well, i wasn’t suppose to post this episode now, but I pushed myself and tried to give it a chance and luckily, I finished this episode!! yey!! sorry for being the worst writer ever on this site, but pls don’t hate me, lol. sooo maybe feedbacks?,, love y’all, thanks for reading it!! ♡

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Jung Hoseok is the man of hope. He and everybody knows it. But are they okay with this? Maybe most of his friends and family members were okay with this but among them, Kim Seokjin didn't like how he always tried to be helpful and all. He wouldn't have any problems with Hoseok being like that unless he wasn't all over you. Hoseok never admits it, but he knows it. Unfortunately, he knew him well enough to understand how he feels from scanning his acts and looks around you. And Seokjin will do the best thing by opening the topic of you in front of his other friends because then, he would have nowhere to hide.

''Well, I don't know that but I'm saying this. That woman hates me.'' Jungkook let out a big sigh, the sight of the red-haired middle-aged teacher scaring the hell out of him, sending shivers to his neck. He wasn't the smartest one to figure out things easily, but he knew it. Maybe the way she sizes him up bleakly, or the way her mouth crinkles in disgust. Or maybe even the way she calls his name like she was spitting. Jungkook was sure, his teacher was hating him. ''I'll never graduate because of her...''

''Okay, first of all, stop being all gloomy about this and think.'' Jimin snaps his fingers before continuing to talk, ''maybe there is one other way to get on well with her,''

''Oh my god. Shut that filthy mouth of yours!'' Jungkook covers his ear, physically abhors from what his friend just implied. ''I would never do... that,''

''Jungkook you know who is not going to work as a nurse in a hospital?'' Jin tilts his brows, secretly pitying the boy who has red cheeks in front of him. ''perverts like him,''

''Oh, c'mon,'' Jimin whined, staring at the pointed finger with a knot between his brows. ''I said what everybody was thinking. Blame me all you want but you were thinking like me!''

Hoseok giggles while watching the way his friends tearing each other apart with their stares, enjoying the chaos more than he should. Probably the drinks he had just hit his head. He poured himself another one while Jin got red because of all the yell he did to Jimin, and the poor youngest watching them with rounded doe eyes.

''I see you are having a great time over there,'' the tone of his friend alarmed Hoseok, he acknowledged that he is the next target of his. So he holds his arms up, his pupils dilated from the fear he feels. ''Hey... what did I do to earn that look?''

Jimin's little 'o's filling the room while darting his eyes over Jin and Hoseok, happy to see how tables have turned. The youngest staring his hyungs curiously.

''So you say that you did nothing wrong?'' Jin crosses arms above his chest, cock his head aside. ''Nothing?'' he asks once again to prevent his friends from attempting to deny him. Light tension fills the room while they stare at each other in silence.

''He is talking about the patient of his, dummy,'' Jimin can't wait a little longer and talks before Hoseok says something. He lifts an eyebrow, trying to understand what his friend was talking about. His 'o' shaped mouth leaves its place to a pout. ''What patient?''

Hoseok asks but deeply knows who Jin was referring to, but he wants to deny all he can. Wouldn't want to believe that he was being that obvious in front of his friend and also his co-worker. His heart race goes high, can't believe how unprofessional he looked. If Hoseok ever wanted to disappear from somewhere, it wasn't the time where his pants decided to leave his body and him staring his first crush in his pink underwear. After memories of the first grade fill his mind, Hoseok's face goes even redder than ever.

''You know 'what' patient I'm talking about Hoseok,'' the oldest rolls his eyes, his nose crinkles in shame after seeing the useless attempts of his friend. He is the second oldest in this group after Jin, yet he looked like a three years old boy. ''I'm talking about Y/N, saying it in case you try not to understand once again, for god sakes Hoseok...'' Jin lets a big sigh, shaking his head earnestly.

When a pair of sweat drips occurs in his forehead, Hoseok uses the back of his hand to wipe. Even though he tries hard not to be obvious while dripping anxiety sweats, everyone in the room can regardable as a smart man, plus they were knowing him for a long time so it was useless for Hoseok to try to act cool. He lets a little gasp, pouting, ''Yeah, Y/N. She... she looks like a good person. Yeah..''

''Good enough to makes you want to slide in her pants?'' Hoseok gasps dramatically, facing Jimin's big grin with a hand on his chest. He could die from embarrassment.

''Jimin-ah! Stop talking nonsense.'' Jimin's hand wraps around his shoulder, rubbing the spot where his hyung just put a punch, it hurts enough to make him regret what he said but he can't control his tongue when he is with them and the alcohol in his veins. ''Don't make me yell again. I'm working tomorrow,''

Jimin's knitted brows start to ease, while his grin finds its place on his lips. But he shifts from where he sits, abstaining from hyung's punch before saying what he has in his mind. ''Does Y/N have an appointment tomorrow?'' he sizes the man in dark hair, flushed pink cheeks in joy. Hoseok doesn't want to look curious and tries to hold his body stable, not moving a muscle or landing an eye on Jin. But he is burning in curiosity, his fingertips numb with the memory of him touching, patting your arm fills in his mind.

The heated body, radiating too much agony. And for some reason, he can't quite understand, but he knows that he hates to see you like that. How many times did he see you before, three? In every one of them, you looked burned out, terrified. He doesn't know what he hates the most. The sorrow in your eyes or the way you startled in every situation. He doesn't know, nor he understands, put logic in it. But he wants to make sure of your well being. Not knowing you or you being his friend's patient won't stop him, he knows it for sure. Unless you want him to stop.

''It's not that scary, right hyung?'' with the poke on his shoulder, Hoseok tears from his thoughts, and you. But little did you know, the image of your bright stare in the hospital exit never leaves Hoseok's mind. Haunts him every minute.

''R-right, not that scary,'' Hoseok nods while the thought of you being a witch wanders on his mind. He is sure that he got caught up in your spell.

How many times can a person make mistakes? Does it have any statistics, or it's up to that person's imbecility? If you try to count the mistakes you made, you probably would drown under them like a used chocolate packet. But thinking about past mistakes could not give anything in return. Therefore, you focused on today and the days that were waiting for you.

Searching on the internet about pregnancy, reading all the comments about it didn't help you the way you want. Moreover, it just turned you into a confused wreck. To be more clear, you were looking at how a pregnant woman feels about it, and if you were making a mistake for not choosing abortion. It didn't help because they all wrote how good to be pregnant and being a mother. How they felt amazing and the special bond between them and their babies.

The one bond you couldn't feel for a particular reason.

They all wanted to be a mother, thinking about this a lot and then deciding the time they want. And the ones who got pregnant by accident or without wanting at first, get used to all the hardship with their partner unlike you.

It was useless, and just remembered how lonely you are. So you had to close the laptop before you broke it. Thanks to your pregnancy brain, you never felt this unstable in your life. It was being on a roller coaster with never-ending ups and downs. One second, you were feeling above the clouds, happiest woman ever, and then bam, something just snaps and you can't ease the need to break something. Preferably someone's neck.

''Yah! From earth to the woman who is drooling,'' when Taehyung snaps his finger on your face, you flinch with the sudden move. Tearing yourself from your thoughts, you size the lovely boys who are staring at your face. ''What were you thinking that deeply?''

''And use this. Geez,'' taking the white napkin from Namjoon's hand, you push it to your drooling chin. It was surprising how much saliva your body produces. Almost equal to a Lama. ''It was nothing. Just... just thinking about work and stuff, you know,''

Namjoon tsks, lifting his brows in disbelief. ''And I should believe this?'' you shrug one shoulder, throwing the napkin on the table after folding in your palm. You also read about pregnancy drooling. At first, you did not believe it, but as you can see how much you do it was impossible not to believe. ''Believe it or not, it's the truth I'm telling you.''

''Aish... stubborn as always,'' Taehyung rolls his eyes at you, pulling his eyes from you to land on Yoongi who sits right beside you. ''Are we watching the movie as we are all together and no work tomorrow?'' he sizes you all, eyes gleaming with expectations.

''The one you never shut your mouth about?'' Yoongi asks, showing how he got sick of his countless insists to watch a certain movie with them because he was the chicken in the group. ''It's fine by me but is it okay to watch scary movies during pregnancy?'' he continues after Taehyung nods in excitement, but once Yoongi points at the elephant in the room, his mood visibly fades.

''I don't think so,'' guessed as the elephant in the room, ''They never said anything about it. Both Seokjin and the internet so yeah, why not. Let's get over with it,'' you waved your hand, trying not to turn this into something big.

When Taehyung wiggles his body in weal, Yoongi scoots over, landing his arm over your shoulders and pulling you close. ''You can always hug me if you feel too scared, you know?'' he grins, patting you on the shoulder. The daringness of the boy always manages to shock you, leave you speechless. But Namjoon acts before you can say anything, ''If she can't find you, there is always another man who waits for her. Right, Y/N?'' he made the effort to sound sneering. You give the finger as a response, but he finds it amusing.

''Wait-Who are you talking about? Yourself?'' the ash-blonde haired man's eyes go wide, brows tilted. Pout on the lips looks adoring on him, as cheeks get even more fluffy. You want to laugh but you cover your mouth with your hand before sending menacing eyes at Namjoon.

''Huh. No, aish... no way. I'm telling this one last time, she is not my type. Sorry, honey but I'm talking about Damian. The man who always tries to get in your pants, remember?'' You shush him off immediately. The level of restraining you had against your anger getting lower by the unabashed smile he sends at you.

''He is not trying...'' as everyone knew how Damian treated you, always tried to do something for you, you did not feel the need to talk back. Teahyung laughs while Namjoon fills his mouth with the cupcake he bought for you. There is no need to say he ate half of them.

''That man waits on a leash for you, and don’t even fight me on this. You know that.'' Namjoon said, his voice sounded hoarse because of the cupcake he was rolling in his mouth.

''I agree with Namjoon-ah on this. I saw it with my bare eyes, he is so whipped for you.'' Taehyung backs up, leaning to steal a cupcake from the plate. Even though you know they were right, you didn't want to talk about him anymore. He had a thing for you or not, either way, you didn't want to think about a man in this circumstance.

''He can wait all he wants, but we all know this pretty lady only has one man in his heart,'' when he gets sick of the topic and hearing the name of a man his friend's talking about, he decides to step in. Yoongi suppresses you on his chest tighter, wrapping you with his warm arms. ''And that man is me, right?''

Humming at his question, you wrap your arms around him and let yourself find comfort in his soothing affection.

The four of you grow together, got more and more close in time, but contrary to Namjoon and Taehyung friendship it was different with Yoongi. You two met when you both had a bad breakup, and were suffering yourself every day. So, your relationship took a different path after a while, it turned into something more platonic. Neither of you had feelings towards each other but finding comfort and serenity in one another company. It wasn't anything physical if you don't count the comfy hugs, tiny kisses, and holding hands when one of you needed it.

It happened only when you two felt lonely at the same time, and never crossed the line of friendship. It was a harmless, tiny platonic relationship, and you both loved the way it's going.

You squish yourself deeper in Yoongi's hold when Taehyung started the scary movie. Between Taehyung's screams and Namjoon's criticisms, you giggled when they started to bicker with each other. And in moments like this, you felt extremely happy. Thankful for having them, the chosen family of yours. It was a great way to have a break from feeling miserable and lifeless.

‘‘Not right for god sake! I said left, yes, a fucking left!’’ you scream at the man who drives, knowing your words sound harsh, you couldn’t help but not caring a bit as the pain in your inguinal area disturbs you. Yet, your screams and constant curses won’t help the redhead to drive decently, or not miss a turn. Trembling hands help him as much as you while he drips red sweat from his forehead. ‘‘Okay, okay… Can you not shout and leave my eardrum alone. Chill a little woman, geez…’’

‘‘Have this burning feeling between your legs, and then try to tell me to shut my mouth. Dickhead!’’ You didn’t know why but you were sure of having a urinal affection that tries to kill you for sure. It started two days ago but it only annoyed you while peeing, but after a while it started ache without even landing your back on the toilet. You could only crawl your legs and press them together to abstain from the pain, yet it was useless.

Taehyung, the lucky man who is driving you to your appointment, wipes the sweat on his forehead, breathing out from his nostrils in annoyance. ‘‘Sure. I won’t forget that,’’ he snaps back, rolls his eyes at you. His grip on the wheel loose after a while, as he doesn’t want to turn this situation even harder for you. Peeking an eye on you, he decides to melt the ice between you and himself. One hand on the wheel, other reaches out and holds yours tightly, and puts a boxy smile on his face. ‘‘Just hang a little okay? We are almost there.’’ Even though you want to spit on his face one second ago, with the sudden affection your heart decides to melt under his caring gaze.

You will never get used to these abrupt ups and downs. Not in a million years.

‘‘Well, I’m not giving birth, don’t I? At least, yet,’’ he giggles, shoulders move a bit with the vibration of his laugh. Thankfully, Taehyung didn’t decline your call when you desperately called him after Yoongi, as you knew you couldn’t handle driving a car in these situations, and taxi drivers always get on your nerves so using them with these hormones wouldn’t end well. Taehyung took the savior role and didn’t lose himself even though he had enough of your filthy mouth, at least he was still driving you to hospital. Not dumping you on the road even though he considered this for a minute.

‘‘Want to wait for me to park the car or meet you there?’’ he cuts your thoughts while pulling the car in front of the entry. Moving swiftly, you open the door and almost run to the elevators after telling him a simple ‘there’, leaving him behind. Heading to the elevator, you act like you are not having the thought of the man who has a heart-shaped smile. You didn’t even know his name, as you trick yourself into this idea. You press the button after entering the grey elevator with a couple of people, two of them step out with you on the third floor, heading to a different direction.

While you were walking to your doctor office, for the first time in weeks, you didn’t feel heavy on the heart. Not that you were not anxious, but it was different now. The ball of sweats didn’t crept towards your forehead, heart wasn’t beating like it was going to explode, or the way your eyelids stayed dry. Normally they would go puffy from wetness by now. But here you are, standing inches away from Doctor Kim’s door, and not having a slight terror beating on your throat.

This is a first for you. And probably for your doctor too as he always witnessed your breakdowns. What a pathetic loser, he must think about you, as you did think just like that.

‘‘Welcome, Y/N,’’ Doctor Kim reacts by standing up after seeing you, holding his hand up to greet you. You couldn’t help not to mirror his smile, squeezing his hand with a pleased smile, happy to see him. ‘‘You look good. Things have been going good, I guess?’’ he asks, pulling his hand to gesture you to sit in your usual place. For a second, you stay silent, not knowing what to say as you didn’t want to lie for some reason. Knowing he is always caring and sweet towards his patients, he still manages to make you feel special in a way. Probably thinking dumbly, but you feel close to this man, and wanted to share the truths. Even though you were not sure if things have been going good, or the total opposite. Well, you were still dealing with pregnancy hormones, morning sickness, and constant urinal issues - ignoring the unwanted pregnancy -, but you can say you were more optimistic these days? You didn’t know, had no idea…

Sitting on the black couch where he gestured, you bob your head, gathering your thoughts. ‘‘To be honest, I don’t know how I feel. You know about the pregnancy mind and emotions. I think I’m trying to be better,’’ he gives a polite smile, white pearls appear behind his lips. ‘‘Oh, that’s good news. At least we are trying to overcome the negativities, huh?’’ you giggle, nodding while your heart warmed with the way he mentions ‘we’. Not throwing you under the bus, but also counting himself in, easing your anxiety day by day. You found yourself lucky.

‘‘So, painful urinates.’’ his expression changes in a minute to a professional doctor he is from a friendly one. Eying the papers for a couple of minutes, he holds out a tiny paper to you before adding, ‘‘Let’s have a urine test, first.’’ he smiles again, and informs you about the floor you should go to.

You already hate taking these tests, have to pee in a cup and all the humiliation you felt after holding it in your hand in the corridor, in front of all those people. Like it wasn’t enough, you couldn’t drop a little drip in a damn cup. Exhaling the air in your lungs, you wipe the sweats from your forehead. Of course, nothing will work in the way you wanted, have to drive you crazy before. ‘‘Why, why, why exactly I can’t pee?’’ you groaned, lifting your pants and pulling the zip before washing your hands two times - because who would wash one time -, and you exit from the toilet to meet with your friend. ‘‘I can’t pee,’’ you sat in defeat, shoulders dropped dead on your body, and you watched your friend’s laughs and snorts that filled the corridor. At least one of you had fun today…

‘‘You look all pouty and teary just because you can’t pee?’’ he hits his knee with one hand, lips reaching from ear to ear, while you eye him with a crabby gaze. This man wants a punch. ‘‘Ohh… God, you are so cute,’’ he continues to giggle while arms pull you into a hug, one kiss lands on your hair. Then, he informs you to wait for him, and leaves you there to overthink. It’s funny how life treats you sometimes, when you think. You literally wake up every hour to pee from your comfy bed, but when it’s come to an important task, your urinal system decides not to do the thing that it does for a thousand times a day. Hah, funny! Not that you are surprised, though. Looking at your past, nothing came easy, hence, never left without making a big fuss. You did get used to all the trembling mess in your life, but all you wanted was to pee without having a meltdown. Is it too much to ask? Aish… just when you thought everything going alright, not suffocating you with handicaps on your way and such things like-

‘‘For a person who holds a plastic cup, you look very sad.’’ a honeyed giggle interrupts your overthinking, forcing your attention on itself. And with a slight surprised gaze, you had nothing to do other than facing the oh so familiar sound. ‘‘Do you need help?’’

‘‘With this?’’ you hold the cup high, now surprised more than before. Watching the man giggle visibly, after seeing your wide open eyes.

‘‘What! Of course not.’’ he almost shrieks with a mocking attitude. ‘‘It was a way more general question than it’s heard.’’ finally he stops laughing, giggling after sitting right beside you. Brown gaze locked on you after silence takes over your small conversations, but you don’t feel uncomfortable the way you should. The way you thought you should act if you run into him again, but the annoying fondness toys with your heart. After the day you last saw him, you regretted shortly after the way you acted all needy, as a fragile little girl. You still can’t believe how you felt heartbroken when he didn’t find a way to drive you home. What were you? Some girl who can’t control her emotions or hormones? And no, using pregnancy as an excuse won’t work this time. You had strict rules to obey. No man must go near to your heart.

‘‘Doctor Kim wanted a urine test?’’ Hoseok tried to look cool, asking nonchalantly and tried to trick himself as he only wondered about this as a nurse. Not out of curiosity about your situation or health. Badly wishing you would fool around and not hit him on the head.

‘‘Hmm. Probably an infection. He wanted a test.’’ you nod, chewing your bottom lip while his chocolate orbs never leaves your face. While your fingers play with the cup, eyes locked on them as you are afraid to look him in the eye, not trusting yourself enough on not blushing all over while eying him. He had some kind of an effect on you, and you hated that. You really did. He leans closer when you scream internally, ‘‘There is something,’’ he murmurs before the touch of his fingertips lick your cheek a bit, feeling the tremble on his hand while he takes a tiny leaf from your hair. It was stupid to feel, but the scene had resemblance with the tv dramas. Both of you stayed dumbfounded as he dared to touch you, of course, you were too close and air left the tiny space. Under the spotlight you two were frozen, waiting for a miracle to move. Something happened soon after, but you may not call it a ‘miracle’ as it was your dumb friend, who yelling at you from across the corridor.

‘‘Y/N-ahhh!’’ A couple of eyes landed on Taehyung in disbelief, a couple of ‘tsc’s murmured by the older ones, and immediately the young man shut his mouth. Holding his hand above his parted lips, embarrassment turns his cheeks scarlet, heart beating inside of his throat. But all the embarrassment dies after Taehyung spots you and the man right beside you, hand on your hair, the same scarlet on his face. Then Taehyung visibly changes, and you know what is about to happen that you hated so much. Before you could open your mouth to say something, or Hoseok lands his hand, your friend was there. Taking deep breaths, nostrils getting big with every breath. ‘‘I’m Taehyung, and you?’’ wanting to slap your forehead, or his face, you stood up and Hoseok followed your act.

‘‘H-hey. Hoseok,’’ Hoseok holds his whimper when the red haired man tries to break his hand in the handshake. He doesn’t understand the situation, or why this man looks like he was about to rip his head off, but Hoseok couldn’t help to push his chest up a little bit to show he is not intimidated by the man in front of him. ‘‘Hahaha, how you meet with each other kindly, huh? Hoseok is the best nurse in this hospital as Doctor Kim said,’’ you try to ease the moment, but the words all sound shrill, ‘‘And Taehyung is-’’

‘‘Taehyung,’’ your best friend for life, wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer to his body. With dreadful eyes you scan his face, then landing on Hoseok, watching the strain on his jaw. ‘‘Nice to meet you,’’ Taehyung adds, and you want to punch him. Oh gosh, you want to punch him so bad on the balls. Until his know-it-all, stupid face reddened. He was forcing your restraining level, pushing you too much with the protective acts of him. Between your internally crisis, you land an apologetic gaze on Hoseok’s, wishing him not to care of your stupid friend’s attitudes.

‘‘Yes. Yes, of course, nice to meet you, too,’’ Hoseok bids his goodbye after taking his hand from Taehyung’s grip, as kind as he can manage. Trembling left hand finds a way to ease the act by wandering on his hair, ruining it. He doesn’t know why the burning ball dropped at his chest out of nowhere, or why his breaths become so fast. Wanting to punch himself in the face, he can’t get rid of the image of the arm over your shoulders. Blood almost meets with air when he bites down his lip, a feeling clawing his chest, but he doesn’t know what it is. He doesn’t want to learn, either.

‘‘Ouch!’’ Taehyung voices a hoarse whine, rubbing the skin under his rib cage. An instant ache raised after the touch of your elbow, landing on him with a great aspect. ‘‘Did I play good?’’ he tries to laugh but with the pain he wheezes, playfulness wiped from his face.

‘‘What was that?’’ slapping him one more time, you raged. Hoseok’s back already lost in the corridor, but remembering how his face dropped down, and a terrible anguish struck your heart. Of course it was only because Taehyung mocked him, that was why you felt this stinging guilt. Yeah, that’s why. ‘‘What was what? I think I played well. Shouldn’t we protect you from the danger going around?’’ he asked like it was the obvious thing. Surprise on the face.

‘‘Who are ‘we’, exactly?’’

‘‘Well, you know. Me, as your best friend, also Namjoon. And Yoongi, not that I can count him as your friend, but yeah… You see, that is we,’’ he points, dropping a quotation mark on the air. Breath, yes just breath and ignore the boiling anger inside of you. It would be the best thing to do. ‘‘And here, drink this bottle. Sure you’ll pee like an elephant in a minute.’’ Before taking the bottle from his grip, you tried to say something, abortively parting your mouth only to close it in a minute as you don’t know what to say. The redhead eyes you as if nothing happened, like he didn’t do anything wrong a minute ago, and you didn’t know which word would shake his mind. Maybe a slap, or even a kick would work but with a living creature inside of your belly, you won’t kick anybody. Even if that anybody boils your blood, inflames your migraine.

Audibly gulping you drink the water swiftly. Hitting the bottle on his chest, you turn to sit where Hoseok just left. An itchy feeling appeared on your chest, leaning to your fingertips by your arms, and you wanted to do something. Probably it was a dumb idea, but for some reason you had an urge to explain who was Taehyung actually, why he was here and all the question in his mind. Even though some part of you screams at you, writing the sane thing with red color. Why would he have any questions in his mind? Or, why would he want an explanation from you?

Not knowing exactly if it’s okay to eat diet biscuits, you send another crumb to your mouth, crushing it slowly between your molar teeth. A kid looks at you with wide eyes beside you, she points you to show how scary you look while looking at the floor in a trance to her mother. Which you don’t know what was going on in the world as thinking about nothing was way more entertaining than watching the others. Plain biscuit didn’t put a joy in your mouth, rather it tasted like grass. Not that you knew how grass tasted like, or not that you waited for an explosion in your mouth out of joy. All these useless thoughts wander on your mind, keeping you busy while you wait for your test results. Surprisingly, your dummy friend advised you the reasonable thing, like a broken clock showing the right time twice a day, he used his dusty brain for once. After gulping down a bottle of water, a wave of need had hit you on the inguinal area. All you needed to do was wait for the moment, but you were too impatient to do so. Hitting the table with your fingertips, keeping a broken rhythm, humming to yourself got boring after you started. A ball was going right to the left in your blank head, you were able to hear the sound of emptiness.

‘‘I don’t want to eat this!’’ in the crowded hospital canteen a voice comes out, beating all the other sounds and tickling your ears. ‘‘No. I said no!’’ when the woman tried to feed the little satan again, he jerked his hand and hit the spoon on the woman's hand. Geez. A cold drop takes a track all the way down your spine, causing you to shiver in shock. The satan in the shape of a little boy started to cry soon after the spoon met with the floor, kicking the table and smacking the food on the ground. You were stunned, speechless for a moment as the scene continued by the little boy having a tantrum right beside you. Calling him with such a bad name didn’t bring you any guilt, moreover, you think it suited him well. Red on the face, constant punch on the air and wobbly screams coming out of the boy made some resemblance with the evil force in him. Not that you knew much about babies or little kids, but this boy looked at least four or five years old, yet he managed to put fear in your gut.

A bucket of cold water dropped by your head, waking you from the trance you dive into. You had no idea about raising a baby, or taking care. It was hitting you with a wave of truth that you had no ability to look out for a baby, while you can’t even survive from the winter on your own. Never thinking of raising the baby in your belly, you never applied to an adoption foundation, though. What were you thinking? You would get used to this, being pregnant, being a mother? Suddenly you would expect the baby, out of nowhere?

You were acting foolish, reckless and immature. Always having hard times without a father, how could you think you can raise a baby on your own. And until now, you didn’t know that you had such a dump idea. Did you really want to raise a baby on your own, you weren’t quite sure about it, but you never researched the many ways of adoption. Bitterness floats around your tongue, your grip on the biscuit hardened, until there is nothing but a bunch of crumbs. Cold wet stick on your back, black shirt becoming the second skin while your eyes wander around everywhere. Having multiple panic moments these last weeks, you read much about pregnancy depression, which they mostly said it was okay to feel depressed or down because of the uncertainties of your emotions. They were up and down in a blink, filling your stomach until you threw them out with a retch, waking you up with heavy breaths in the middle of the night. That’s why, you always found yourself thinking if this would be much easier with somebody, with… him. Sticking your tongue between your teeth, you hate yourself for thinking about him, the man who ran away from you with toes hitting his butt. And all these pregnancy hormones were confusing your mind, causing you to barking up the wrong tree.

While you were feeling under the water, fighting with your thoughts to see clearly, a sweet melody of a laugh interrupted the stinging flood of negativities on your mind. Something snapped, and all the scars started to heal after hearing a simple giggle.

Holding your head up, letting the soothing tone sail into your skin, kissing all the stitches to heal by soft touches, you eyed him. Growing pains chucked away against the pressure of the thrilling balm, honeyed warmness bloomed in your chest after witnessing the mouth curling a heart-shape. He was close enough for you to see the glowing wriggle in his eyes, and you wanted to curl, cover your body with the thought of its beauty. For a second, you wanted to let yourself find the momentary tranquility under his magic, even though it was black. Even though it was harmful for you, too soothing, too good to be true.

‘‘H-hi,’’ with a croaky voice popping on your mind, you shake your head to come back to reality. The reality where Hoseok was standing behind the table, a timid smile on his face, feeling uneasy.

Hands crossing each other's way, you stare him blankly, mouth barely spills the greeting. ‘‘Still waiting for the reports?’’ he asks after coughing to get rid of the hoarse voice, billion reasons wandering inside his mind, telling him not to talk with you after what happened on the second floor, but the unknown reason holds his legs tight. Conversely, the part of him, where the logic was long lost can’t ignore the doleful lines on your face. Hundred promises lost its effect with one glimpse towards your direction. Promising, taking oaths for not talking to you was useless over the way his heart reacted after seeing the way you sit all alone. His guts, senses, brilliant mind were nothing but a bunch of trash when it comes to you, and the more he hated the way he walked over his own promises, the more he found himself in a deep hole, where he can’t think of anything but you. As his friend said before, he was stupid. Hoseok knew this very well.

‘‘Yeah, still waiting. But, it’ll be over soon,’’ you cracked a tiny smile, scanning his face until a voice cut the moment, but Hoseok’s lips never moved.

‘‘Hey, it’s Jimin,’’ hand hanging in the air, you stared at the man for a second before reacting. Slightly long dark hair falls on the side of his forehead, a tender smile turns his pupils into half-moons, self-assuredness can easily read. ‘‘The best nurse you can run into,’’ he nods to emphasize his words. But his cockyness fades after Hoseok adds ‘pre’ to his caption, holding your laugh back you cover your palm over your mouth. Hiding your grin back as you don’t want to offend the boy you just met. ‘‘Hi, it’s nice to meet. You can call me Y/N,’’ hearing your name, a light ignites in his half-moons, passing by in satisfaction.

‘‘You don’t mind if we sit together, right?’’ mischievous glares stare deep in you, like he tries to prevent you from saying no, yet you had no intentions to say that. ‘‘We don-’’

Hoseok eyes you in surprise after you cut his words half, not expecting you to agree on what Jimin just said. The smile on your lips shocks him as well, getting cramps on the heart when you land your eyes on him that softly. ‘‘Of course, that would be good. Having a company sounds good,’’

‘‘Where is your…-red haired man?’’ a bizarre tone rises from Hoseok when he takes his place on the chair beside you. Before answering him, the embarrassing scene plays on your mind, sending a bunch of curses to the man who drives himself away from the hospital. You curl an apologetic smile. ‘‘He needed to leave. You know, work calls,’’ allowing yourself to feel stupid, blaring giggle popped out of you. It sounded fake, as you were still ashamed of Taehyung’s behaviours. He only nodded, not adding anything until the black haired one leaves to get something to drink. It was silent between you, but nervousness could cut a wire. Both the way his jaw tenses every other minute, and the way your eyes never land on him more than three seconds, you can sense the awkwardness. Never seeing him like this also disturbed you even though you only run into him for like three times. But as soon as the younger one moved away, chary words spilled by his lips.

‘‘W-was he the father of the baby?’’ Hoseok asked, knowing he is crossing the line big time, but the vexed part of him clouds his logic. Even though he curses himself being this immature, he can’t help the vain need that grows inside of him to learn the truth. Even before seeing your face getting white, lips parting abruptly with an unexpected question, Hoseok knew he shouldn’t ask the question, but witnessing the way you react, he curses himself one more time. ‘‘Who? Taehyung?’’ As you weren’t waiting for him to ask such a question, he wasn’t expecting you to laugh until your body became involved in your laughter. Stuttering, being unable to complete your word, you hold your finger on the air to ask for a minute to gather yourself. For a moment of thinking Taehyung as the father of the baby in your belly made you giggly mess because of the abruptness of it. You not only want to retch with the thought of it, but also want to laugh until your muscles stop working. ‘‘No! Oh, o-of course, no.’’ forgetting where you were, you burst out.

‘‘Oh, okay?’’ ignoring the dense relief, Hoseok hesitated. Not knowing what to say in return as you were trying to hold your laugh back.

‘‘S-sorry but thinking of him as that just wrecked my nerves for a moment.’’ wiping the tears from your eyelids, you continued. ‘‘He is my friend. Best friend to be exact. He did act silly before, sorry for that either. He think he needs to protect me.’’ as you gave too much information at one, Hoseok’s pupils grew bigger, and weren't expecting to receive such a reply. He doesn’t even try to hide his amused smile back, shamelessly showing it out. ‘‘Good,’’ he commented before causing a big, heavy silence between you two. As you eyed him in a moment of confusion glowing in your eyes, weighing the meaning behind the word, you were utterly surprised. Was it just to fill the space, or he meant something else, you never truly understand, but decided to lure yourself into thinking it meant nothing. Otherwise, you were in a state of having no control over your emotions, and god knows what that simple world would do to your mind, playing games until you found yourself curled in your sheets, losing the pitiless game. You had lived that more than once, but in this situation, it would tousle you and throw your parts messily.

Dropping himself on the chair, Jimin spread the husky mood. ‘‘Here hyung, your latte.’’ He pushed the glass to Hoseok’s direction, smiling sweetly, he didn’t forget you. Putting the scarlet cup in front of you, knowing the pleasant scent devours your nostrils in no time. ‘‘And this is for you. It’s my favorite so I hope you’ll like this,’’ he adds, gaze glowing happily.

‘‘Ah. Thank you,’’ before taking a sip, you murmur, bowing your head little to show your gratitudes. Risky mood runs away after the hot liquor lingers around your mouth, playing, tickling your tongue over and over until it has lost its ruins. Well, you can say that you liked Jimin without having any lack of sympathy before he even treated you with the oh so familiar taste. It was soothing, alarming your senses to ease kind of a taste, and you remembered how your mother always made a cup of this tea whenever you gave her a tantrum. It never mattered if the tantrum was caused because you wanted a shoe, or rejected by those companies over and over again. And for a split moment your heart jammed between the agonizing longing over seeing her crow's foot while your mother smiles endearingly. ‘‘What is this?’’

Seeing how your face lightens with the flush crepting up your face, Jimin waits a second to answer. ‘‘It-it’s my mother's recipe. Why?’’

‘‘You serious?’’ mouth falling open, having no control over the tone of your voice, you yowled. Without wasting another minute, you gulp down the second sip. Licking the taste out of your lips, a smile beamed to your face.

‘‘W-why?’’ stuttering his words, Hoseok leaned closer. Dramatic dread banged his face in a flash of light, but before he could gather his senses, Jimin’s mischievous eyes caught him.

‘‘My mother always made this when I felt angry or emotionally sick. Even now,’’ giggling away your embarrassment as you shared much again. Seeing the way Hoseok’s dimple color the side of his upper lips as it gets smaller with the curling smile. His eyes glistened with the dim joy covering over his chest. And it affected you. ‘‘So who made them?’’ you look back as you were able to see the creator of your childish happiness, and attempt stealed a tiny laugh from Jimin’s lips.

‘‘It’s a secret for now,’’ with a twisted smile curling his face, he swallowed a big sip from his coffee. ‘‘As we need to leave now. Right hyung?’’ Two pairs of eyes land on Hoseok, who was locking his gaze on you with an adoring smile on the corner of his lips. Not wanting to show it on your face, you were heartbroken a little as he just got here. They. They just got here. And you can’t deny that you had fun talking with Jimin, sharing the same recipe from your mother’s was exciting. But you had to gulp down your disappointment after seeing the mealy eyes, you faked a giggle. ‘‘I will be okay if you’re looking at me like that because you think I’m too powerless to be left alone.’’ To be honest, you lied to avoid revealing any kind of negative expression. Including yourself, as you repeat that you don’t need someone to hold your hand and wait by your side. Liar.

‘‘Did you came here with your car?’’ he was about to turn his back when the idea hit him, and he gestured his body towards you once again. Reminding you of the absence of any vehicles to take you back to your not so lovely, cold home. Whether you were exaggerating the situation of your home, you blamed the loneliness. It made you feel cold in there, like a lost puppy, who can’t find the way back home. ‘‘Uber gonna work for me today,’’ you hinder the unnecessary thoughts of you, smiled naively. Then, ecstasy glowed in his browns. Like he detected something way good to celebrate it with a genuine grin. ‘‘If it’s okay, I’d like to drive you back. I had a semi-promise as I remember?’’

This was unexpected. As you stare at him back, lips parted slightly due to the maze you found yourself in, feeling a bit funny. Hoseok felt the urge to continue as you stayed staring as you just swallowed a stick. ‘‘My shift is almost over, so you don’t have to wait too long. But only if you’re comfortable,’’

‘‘O-okay.’’ Comfortable? Was he joking or he was that oblivious to the way you move, act like a fool around him. ‘‘It would be fine, I guess..’’ your voice trailed off in the end. Afraid to be a burden on him, you were about to turn down his offer. But a blooming, heart-shaped smile put you back on the place. He wasn’t doing these to look kind, he was kind and really wanted to help you out. Even though you weren’t aware of that.

Wetting his lips ecstatically, his fingers met with his hair as he didn’t know where to put them. ‘‘Then I’ll be at the front gate in half an hour later?’’ he noted. Waving his goodbye, as you mimicked him back without forgetting Jimin, telling him how glad you are that you met him. His half-moons appeared as he bid his goodbye back, wrapping his arms around you tightly. It surprised you how sincere he was, but you put aside your cold-hearted acts for a second to hug him the same way. Which, it felt nice. Now, you were going to wait for him after seeing Doctor Kim, and get your medicine. You knew he would give you an antibiotica as you were aware of the current situation. Yes, it is good. Think about antibiotics to press down your horror, your anxiety over being driven to your home by Hoseok. That would hold back your mind from whirling around.

Life was funny. The way it worked amazed everyone in this world as well as you. It was funny because you were a mess not long ago. Agonizing, trembling waves of pain never left your chest for a moment, and you found yourself crying in every possible corner. Opposite to the current emotions howling inside of you. Heart stepped closer to the edge of a skyscraper, almost ready to jump with the non stop thrill pumping out of it. After feeling like ages now, you feel the blooming tiny happiness inside your chest. Besides being a good thing, it was also terrifying as you were broken like a glass, torn into million pieces by the love of your life. At least you thought he was the one. Luckily or not, it came out as a false alarm. He wasn’t the one, and never intent to be. Stop thinking about that imposter you wrecked idiot. There was no way that he could make you sad anymore. Not that you had someone, or thinking about filling his old place. Speaking of the devil’s name, you were not thinking about Hoseok to fill his place, but he helped you in the way he wasn’t aware. You come to your senses, remembering you were still a living, breathing human being. Pregnant or not. It wasn’t the end of the world, and you will figure out what to do. Sooner or later. You always did.

Maybe this, being all sunshine, a ball of optimism was an effect of Hoseok. Still, you were happy at the moment. Weren’t you?

‘‘Oh. You are here,’’ breathy voice came right beside you, tearing you apart from overthinking. And you made the first mistake by sizing him from head to toe. Seeing him in loose black sweatpants, green sporty jacket and darker shade of green t-shirt keeping a necklace above his chest, cost you. The damn glasses didn’t help you, as well. It tied your tongue how his façade changed with a simple outfit. He looked breathtaking indeed. Landing his beg from his shoulders, he pushed back his glasses on his nose. ‘‘I was anxious a bit that you’d left as it took more than I expected to come here,’’

A heavy breath turns into a silent hiccup, hitting you on the chest when his eyelids crinkles with an apologetic smile. This was going to be the biggest mistake you ever made - without counting your pregnancy, of course - and you didn’t pay much attention at the exact moment. It felt warm on the chest, if you had to find an excuse. ‘‘Were you? I just came here, too, so it's okay.’’ Forty minutes wasn’t that long and yes, one can say you just come here.

‘‘Great then. Shall we?’’ Hoseok gestured to the exit, waiting for you to stand beside him. Both of you ignored the growing awkwardness for as long as you can. He was going to drive you home. It was a long road, and you couldn’t just ditch him without offering him something in return.

Imitating him, you arrived in his car in the park. Shiny red car awakened your admiration. Not that you get paid poorly, or you knew much about cars, but you were smart enough to understand how expensive this car is. ‘‘Do you want me to open the heater?’’

‘‘Huh?’’ staring him like a deer in the headlight, you stopped brushing your hands to your pants. He caught you out of blue. ‘‘No, no. It’s not that cold. Just… just my cold hands, that’s all.’’ sinking deeper in the black leather seat, you gulped. Blinking unaware of how pale your face is, you blurt out a plane smile. Never thought of being a woman who likes his partners in such a power, or in great wealth, butterflies raised inside of you. As witnessing the way he grabbed the wheel like ruling a whole country caught your attraction. Was watching someone while driving count as a kink? You didn’t hope so. Fucking pregnancy hormones.

‘‘Can you write the address on the navigation?’’ he pleaded, locking his seat belt. As you mirrored him before typing your address with a shaky hand. Since when giving your address stopped becoming a threat, you didn’t care. Finishing the task he gave, you leaned back happily. Anxiety still tried to get away where you pressed it down, wanted to eat your happiness alive and offer you the biggest panic attack you ever had. Fortunately, Hoseok managed to hold you at ease, even without working for it. After ten minutes of silence - and it was long enough for you to have a drip of sweats on your forehead - he broke it with an apology. ‘‘You can take back your apology that you bid for you friend’s behavior, as mine didn’t act very differently,’’

Releasing the bottom lip free from your teeth’s torture, you turned your head. ‘‘You don’t have to apologize for Jimin. He was sweet,’’ mentioning of his name, mischievous half-moons came alive in your mind. You smiled with the memory. Which Hoseok catched it with the corner of his eye. ‘‘I almost forgot the taste of that tea my mother made for me. So he did something very good for me,’’ you bobbed your head, continuing to smile.

With the word ‘mother’, Hoseok’s memory of seeing you on the bench while crying, having a heart-to-heart talk with your mother rouse itself. Rusty weariness still visible in your façade, his heart sank into a familiar ache, remembering how desperate you looked before. Unintentionally he grabbed the wheel tighter, brows snapped together as he had no power to hold back the pain you were feeling. First time in his life, he felt useless and it bothered him so much. ‘‘Is she living far from you?’’

‘‘If you call two hours of car ride far, then yes?’’ lifting your brow up, you eyed his genuine smile. Eyes getting thinner with the weight of his cheek, milky teeth appeared.

‘‘I never thought that you’ll turn out as a lazy person,’’ as your mouth takes the shape of an ‘o’, his giggles suffuse the car. ‘‘C’mon. Beat me if I’m wrong but you are not really thinking its long, right?’’

‘‘Well, can’t a woman be lazy in peace?’’

‘‘Yep, of course.’ holding his giggle behind, he struggled as you rolled your eyes. ‘‘You are totally. Totally had every right to be lazy. Over a two hours car ride,’’ covering his palm under his lips, honeyed cackles slipped away. He was lucky you found him cute. No. No you didn’t.

‘‘Rude.’’ you crossed your arms above your chest, shifting your direction out of the car, watching the nearest things disappear in a moment. Cars, trees and buildings fading away until the vehicle slowed down a bit, and then stopped going as the red light blurted out. Knowing it will look childish to put an attitude over something this stupid, but for some reason, you also knew he wouldn’t find this abrupt. You would hold your mind busy with keeping an attitude towards Hoseok if your eyes hadn't caught two girls passing by in front of the car, eating the donut ice cream sandwiches in such a piquant way. You knew it was grilled donut, and you would sell your soul just to have one of them right now. Mouth watered with the sight, and tickling craving increased little by little. Covering every piece. If your lips have been locked together a tiny bit loosely, a drop of saliva would drip to the corner of your chin. You read a lot about pregnancy cravings, but you never had this strongly. Fingertips never itched to grab those sandwiches, tear them apart from the girl’s hand this much. Teeth nibbing the bottom lip, you clawed your palms to hold yourself back. At the verge of crying from the need you feel, shaky breath step in the nostrils. It wasn’t the place for this. Not now. Not in front of him.

Eventually, the light turned green, car moved far away from the girls. From the ice cream sandwiches. Far away from the sweet, mesmerizing taste. Fuck this shit. You were about to lose your mind, and nothing took your mind from those sinful sweets you craved so much. Bottom lip starts to tremble with the amount of sadness you gather inside, head almost whirl around and you almost give away a big whine. It was so stupid to feel, but nothing was going to change the way you feel as you know about this--

‘‘Here we are!’’ the man on the wheel turned his head to give an eye curling smile. But your reaction confused him. Trembling lip, the tip of the nose got pink. Teary eyes wide open, looking upset. He had no doubt. You were looking like a little girl, and his heart grew soft. ‘‘Is everything ok-’’

‘‘Thank you for driving me,’’ the brittle voice came out shaky. First, you think about leaving the car as fast as you can and curl in your sheets and cry as you hold tears back, hardly. But the logical side of you found this cruel. Rude also. So you add before grabbing the door handle, ‘‘Can I offer you a cup of coffee? Or whatever you want?’’

Afraid of avowing his thrill, Hoseok bobbed his head. ‘‘I don’t want to tire you-’’

‘‘Hoseok, you drive me back all the way down. This is much I can do for you, so please?’’ If his heart didn’t explode before witnessing the warming scene, it was about to. As you said his name in such a tone, adding the cutting please at the end. He was about to lose his mind. That’s all.

‘‘Okay but I have to get something. You go first, okay?’’ eyes flickered with bliss, your nod was enough for him as a response.

Choosing stairs over the elevator, you breathe out. It was tiring but counting this as an exercise wasn’t the worst thing you had done. Still too burned out from the severe need of the particular dessert, you barely hold yourself on your feet. It was a tiring day. Very, indeed. Throwing your shoes aside, panic bloomed out of sudden. The living room looked like a war scene, and the man you just invited forcefully were about to witness this mess. Standing mortifiedly, you moved swiftly. Gathering the used napkins, dirty t-shirts and socks between your arms, immediately you throw them into your bedroom. He wouldn’t enter here, would he?

Of course he wouldn’t you horny bastard!

Shaking your head, you turn back to collect the dirty bowls and cups from the table. You only be able to throw them into the sink but at least they belong to the kitchen. ‘‘The thing I get hype for,’’ you mumbled while adding coffee to the filtre on your machine. Pregnancy made your life boring. With these simple events, your heartbeats bobbed over your throat. But boring meant a simple life, and simple didn’t bother you that much. Well, you were going to give birth last than eight months later. Simple days didn’t sound that bad now. Thinking about the pain you will feel… Gosh, it was enough to send shivers to your spine. Opening the oven to boil water, you closed your eyes for a second.

Knock. Knock.

Your heart-shaped positivity wasn’t late. It was a bit weird for him to find your apartment right away, as it was his first time. But you didn’t want to bother yourself with such a lame topic, as you opened the door, greeting him with a big grin. He was a guest now. You better act responsible for once. ‘‘Welcome-’’ mouth hanging open, you falter.

‘‘To be honest, I also love ice cream donuts.’’ your real life angel takes a step inside with a box in his hand. ‘‘But I also know how intense and painful can be the pregnancy cravings.’’ exploring his dimpled smile, you stand still in awe. Knees almost gave away with the piercing glee.

‘‘How-.. how exactly you understand?’’ stuttering the words, his smile beamed bigger.

‘‘You were looking at the donuts the same way Mickey stared at my steak. Not to be rude, but it was kinda scary seeing you like that.’’ fingers covering his mouth, lovely giggle slipped once more. And, for the thousand times today, you wanted to cry, but this time it was because of the weight of an armful of happiness. Gratitude. Seeing him all giggly, standing in front of you with a box full of donuts, his thoughtfulness warmed your heart. ‘‘Oh. Did I say do something bad? You look like you were about to cry-’’

‘‘Thank you,’’ words come out in a whisper, husky by the shoulder of him covering your mouth. As you hugged him. Without thinking further. Tightly. Well, when it comes to you, acting unresponsible wasn’t new, but with the new situation made everything even worse. Now, emotions were higher, heavier, wider inside. Plus, he was literally working on breaking your senses, you thought. Even though you sensed he wasn’t a person like that. All calculated and acting sneaky to trick you into something. He was doing all these out of sympathy, and how you didn’t know particularly, but it made everything even more irresistible. Him, to be more specific.

‘‘S-sorry for…’’ after his hesitant arms letting you off, you gestured to the space between you two. The regret now shaped after your temerity, daring to do something like that whirled your stomach. It felt empty, or about to be empty.

His voice mirrored the caringness he puts out, ‘‘Hugging is not something you should be sorry for Y/N,’’ the taller’s heart fluttered inside his chest, like it had wings to do that. Childish joy filled his guts, seeing you can’t press your smile behind. It gave him a weird satisfaction. ‘‘And don’t want to pressure you or anything but are you going to let me in?’’ he tilted a brow, taunting you with the softest way possible.

‘‘Oh, shit-..I mean ‘m sorry,’’

‘‘I thought we agreed not to say sorry anymore,’’ finding you while standing, open mouthed, and not knowing what to do, he decided not to push you anymore. It was fun to him, seeing you all going wide-eyes, lips parted in confusing, and the blush covering the fair cheeks. For the sake of your nerves, he pushed back the laughter when you gestured him inside in defeat. Though, you looked so cute, for his eyes. Shyness of you, the way you tried to pick the right words to spill them, or the way you get all high color of red when you revealed your true self, unintentionally, caused his desire to know you get deeper. It was too early to feel, but seeing you sitting in front of him with a cup of tea between your palms, eying the floor amusingly anxious, bloomed something in his upper body.

‘‘Thanks for the coffee. It's delicious.’’ he gently commanded, pointing the cup in your direction to emphasize. Eyes of him fixed on your face, around your lips. A loud gulp trembling inside of your ears, you blinked. Too much.

‘‘Do I… something on my face?’’ chewing the bottom lip, tap of your nails filled background with tensed noises. When he nodded and pointed to your face, you were surprised. As you weren’t expecting the blurted question would be real.

‘‘Yep.’’ he touched his own face, ‘‘Little upper side of the lips,’’

Wiping the remains of the ice cream off of your face, you wanted to dive into between the floor and never come back. ‘‘Ahh,’’ you murmured a weak thanks, blank space between you and him getting bigger and bigger as the embarrassment filled your cup. Silence fell down on the space, the pressed worry now peeking its head out of you, while you brushed your palm over the leg. You didn’t know what you were expecting when you invited him over, as you nearly know each other, and maybe nothing in common to talk about. But the stargazer side of you hoped you would find something to talk about, and spontaneously you would come out as the funnest, lively person he met. Bet, you were someone he never met before but you did not think it was something to be happy over.

‘‘So, you have a dog,’’ What again? This is your best shot to find something to talk with him? What a brilliant mind you had over there. Well, how could you blame him if he decides to leave you right now, right here.

‘‘Ah, yeah. He is living with my family but yes, I can say that I have,’’ he points out kindly. Probably thinking what was wrong with you as you both looked and sounded dumb and the most boring- ‘‘I see you are living alone? No pet or a roommate.’’ he distracts you from the stressing thoughts that wandered around your mind, tiny uncertainty hanging on his face as he was afraid to pass the line.

‘‘I never thought about having a roommate, or a pet. Even though I like them beyond measure.’’ you continued after a pale smile occurring over your face. ‘‘Maybe in the future? Though, my mother would try to convince me not to, as I’m barely holding myself together,’’ you laughed weirdly as you confessed. He joined you with a wide smile. Mouth taking a shape of a heart, something snapped inside. You licked your lips in need. Something was playing with your air, as you hardly inhaled some. ‘‘Would you do everything your mother said?’’

‘‘Uhm… Probably, yes?’’ crinkling your brows, you gave a thought on it.

‘‘But two hours of car ride still too much?’’

‘‘Hey!’’ wide smile turned into laughter when you protested, and soon after, you joined him. It was impossible to do anything else. The tone of the laugh sounded familiar, comfortable, euphoric, and joyful. And wrongly, it made you spill, blurt out the things you kept to yourself, without even thinking much. The mood turned into a gloomy one right after you started to talk. But it didn’t disturbed you the way you thought it would.

‘‘I know… I know it’s not that long, but, as you know, this pregnancy thing is very new for me, and… and probably you guessed that, but I wasn’t expecting this. And clearly not handling it well. I just can’t confront her before I get used to this, and maybe figure it out what to do?’’ exhaling, heaviness of your chest lessened. ‘‘Unexpectedness of this is already hard and trying to handle this alone is even harder-’’

‘‘Alone?’’ Hoseok couldn’t stop himself before letting the word slip, he regrets it right after. When he cut you off, you realized you shared too much. Eying the cup of tea between your palms, as it had something inside and made you spill all of this. But, without having regrets you continued, worried chuckles jerked out by the lips. ‘‘Well, as it shows, when you aren’t the one who had a growing baby inside, it’s easier to run away.’’

‘‘Oh… I’m sorry,’’ Hoseok doesn’t know what to say in return. He is sorry indeed, but mostly angry. Unreasonable rage burning his chest, his eyes, his palms, he stays silent. His logic just can’t put two in two when it's come to think how someone can be this… this relentless. Memories of your broken face, voice, comes alive once again in his mind, now, everything makes sense. The hurt on your face, loneliness of your eyes. Now he understands why your voice always sounded so weak, so crushed. The blue never leaves your façade. It breaks Hoseok’s heart, but he is thankful as you opened your heart. He feels important. Someone you can talk to. And the elder promises not to hurt this trust you showed, innerly. He puts his anger aside, and focuses to make your face wrinkle with laughter.

And, he does it.

#heartsforbts #bangtanhq #bangtanarmynet #houseofddaeng #btsgoldnet #btswriterscollective #btswritingcafe #hyunglinenetwork #hoseok x reader #hoseok x you #hoseok fanfic #hoseok fluff #hoseok angst #jung hoseok #painkiller #dylanxmin

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gypsydanger01 · 5 years ago

Text

THE STORM - Part sixteen

Fandom: The Boys (Amazon prime tv series)

Pairing: Black Noir x OC

Disclaimer: I don’t own The Boys, only my OC characters and certain pieces of au plot.

Comments, reviews, constructive criticism, and other requests are always more than welcome!

Posting new chapters on Wednesday and Friday!

The Night of the Infiltration

While she’d spent the night dissecting her and Noir’s relationship, she rose from bed the next morning with a clear head. With a long night ahead, she could not afford any distractions. At work, her and Martha chatted, and the blonde attempted to gauge her friend’s state of mind. She seemed steady, focused and—well, normal. Nothing seemed to affect her or frustrate her in the least that day. Not the printer not working, or her computer experiencing technical issues. She didn’t mind the terribly long line in the cafeteria and didn’t seem to care when her papers were misplaced by the office mailman. She was utterly impassive.

Martha worried, even though these were all positive signs. If she’d seen Sarah growing evermore nervous and angry, she’d have pulled the plug. Her being impassive meant she had better control over her more violent emotions.

And soon, people began to gather their things and leave.

Martha and Sarah also shrugged on their coats, packed their bags, and left the building. Before heading their separate ways, Martha grabbed her hand bringing them to a halt.

“Be careful tonight, okay?”

Sarah nodded, wrapping her arms around herself and looking at the crowd swarming the sidewalks.

“I’m serious,” Martha pressed, “I’ll be ready, and get it done as quickly as possible.”

“I know, I’ll be careful,” Sarah promised.

Martha nodded, satisfied with her answer, and pulled her friend into a tight hug.

She whispered, “Don’t worry, we got this, girl.”

And with a wink, Martha spun around and disappeared into the crowd. Sarah chuckled and turned the opposite way to head home.

An hour before go-time, Sarah could be found arming herself in her home. She steeled herself against rushing, and instead took her time. She had changed into a black suit and packed a small bag with the files and thumb drive she’d need once in the archives.

She wore a black wig with long bangs, since she wouldn’t be able to avoid all the security cameras placed between the back entrance and the archives. The wig would confuse them of her identity since her curly hair was a distinctive aspect of her persona. It would immediately give her away. And pulling her hair into a tight bun was strictly not an option, since pulling her hair back accentuated her features.

The suit had a particularly long turtleneck which she could easily lift over her nose, leaving only the upper part of her face exposed. That paired with the wig would be enough to conceal her identity.

She checked her utility belt and finished fixing a series of knives into their sheaths. A single gun with silencer was strapped to the top of her back where she could easily access it. A set of throwing knives were securely tucked against her calves in the side of her heavy-duty boots.

Looking in the mirror, she approved of the sleek, dark vision that was her reflection. She would be such a dangerous piece in this game against Vought. She would be unstoppable. A force to be reckoned with.

Finally, she settled at her kitchen table and waited for the minutes to tick by, counting down to the moment for action. When the clock struck eleven, she rose and made her way out the back door. Crossing her dimly lit backyard, she hoisted herself over the wooden fence and disappeared into the shadows of the back alleys.

Once she’d made it to Vought’s back entrance, she quickly slipped on the glove she’d gotten from Mallory. It felt odd on her skin, as it was made from a biosynthetic material. As soon as the sensor captured the fingerprints, she quickly shrugged it off and placed it into its protective case, which she then slid back into her bag. She stepped into the elevator and punched the button for level 02.

The elevator rose soundlessly, no music or simple tune to ease the tension. The doors slid open, and she cautiously stepped out. She quickly moved down the hall towards the archives and pressed her back to the wall as she neared the final corner to reach its entrance. At night, there were always a team of guards who made sure there were no break-ins, even though it had never occurred before. Two were placed at the building’s entrance, another two near the R&D sector of the building and one near the archives.

She heard the scuffle of shoes against tiled pavement, and the deep sigh that followed. She pulled out a small mirror and used it to look beyond the corner.

There he was. The guard seemed fit, maybe in his mid-thirties. He was seated and scrolling through whatever had his attention on the tablet he held.

Sarah flipped the mirror shut, storing it away.

She grabbed the baton from her belt and focused on her breathing. At her next exhalation, she moved out into the hall and flipped it in his direction. It hit him straight in the face, and while he raised his hands, she sped towards him, kicking him down.

“what the fu—”

She twisted his arm behind his back, and removed all of his weapons, sliding them out of reach. Finally, she crooked her other arm around his neck and dragged him out of potential cameras’ view.

The radio on the guard’s belt crackled to life, “Hey we heard something down your way. Everything okay?”

She pressed harder on his windpipe. “Answer them. Everything is fine.”

“You bitc—”

“None of that, I’m afraid,” she scolded. “Now tell me,” she questioned with a genuinely curious voice, “Do you care more about this company or your life?”

She felt him go still in her arms, followed by a useless attempt to get out of her hold. She held fast, focusing on the mechanics of her grip rather than brute strength. He could get out of the hold, but to do so he’d have to break his own shoulder. She smirked.

“I’ll repeat myself one more time,” she whispered, “Are you going to give your life for this fucking company tonight?”

Finally, he shook his head no.

“Then tell your buddies you dropped your tablet or some bullshit like that.”

He nodded, and she brought the mic up to his lips.

“Everything’s all right, boys,” he hesitated, “Just dropped my tablet with my dumb ass.”

Some laughs broke through the small device, “Take it easy Jackson.”

She clicked the radio’s mic off, satisfied with his answer.

“Yeah, take it easy Jackson,” she whispered in his ear before effectively knocking him out. She took the key card from around his neck.

Sarah rose and flattened her bangs back into place. Stepping over his body, she walked over to the entrance and swiped the card. Access granted.

She withheld her satisfaction and stepped into the dimly lit space. Closing the door behind her, she switched the lights on.

The room was even larger than she had imagined. Rows and rows of servers occupied the room and shelves with boxes full of files lined the walls. A single desk and computer sat alone at the entrance. She quickly took a seat and searched the index for the items she needed to find.

She searched the applied physiology lab and couldn’t find any match. She ran a hand through the straight black locks of hair, sighing in frustration. The guard would be out for a while, but not long enough for her to search the whole database. She inserted a few more dead-end searches. Finally, an idea struck. She typed in her patient code from when she’d been a part of Vought’s experimental treatment. Surely they kept records of their experiments, trials and advancements.

She struck gold and immediately noted the server code on a small piece of paper. Then she quickly searched for Sarah Burns, immediately finding her file among the Vought employees. She noted her file’s position amid the boxes as well.

She turned the computer off and rose out of her seat, taking a second to figure her way through the maze of servers.

Once she’d found the right one, she recalled Martha’s directions on where to put the thumb drive. Double checking, she plugged it into the right slot and pulled her burner phone out.

She sent a quick text. I’m in.

Not ten seconds later, she’d received an answer. I’m on it.

In the meantime, she made her way towards the employee files, committing the path to memory so that she could later find her way back to the thumb drive.

She found her box and flipped through the different folders held inside. Finally, she reached the one on Sarah Burns. She took the papers out and replaced them with the ones she’d fabricated in their stead. Slipping the originals into her bag, she put the box back in its place.

Turning around, she sped back to the server they were currently hacking.

She checked her phone as she weaved through the columns of devices, wires and switches.

She’d gotten a text. Done.

She sent one back. Ok, I’m going to disconnect.

There were only a few corners left and she’d have the USB, ready to leave the building.

It’s already disconnected.

This immediately made her halt. She gathered her breathing, her already alert state of mind sharpening even further. She wasn’t alone.

If it was the guard, there would be no issue, but if it was a member of the Seven, this room was about to be wrecked. She prayed that it wasn't Homelander.

She inched closer with caution in every step.

She peered around the corner and found the server’s glass door closed with no thumb drive sticking out of it. She wanted to curse but focused instead on the sounds around her. When she heard nothing, no steps, no breathing, she realized someone was watching her, toying with her.

Did they already know? Had they simply been waiting for her to make a move?

Well, at this point they’d caught her red-handed.

That’s when she heard the slightest sound, followed by the movement of air behind her. She spun around, and almost choked.

Noir had jumped down from the top of a server and was now standing in the middle of the corridor. One of his gloved hands was curled into a fist, which without a doubt held the thumb drive she so desperately needed.

Oh God, she thought. This isn’t going to end well.

They stood still, staring, and waiting for each other to make the first move. If he was waiting to see if she’d run, he was going to find himself terribly disappointed. She knew from her data collection with Mallory that he enjoyed a hunt. This would be no predator and prey dynamic.

This was a predator facing another predator over a piece of property. She would not go down easy, nor would she flee like a scared rabbit.

Black Noir observed the darkly clad woman standing across the hallway. She seemed untroubled by his presence and didn’t seem likely to back down. There was a deep-set power to her that he had difficulty pinpointing. She looked like an elastic ready to snap.

Tired of waiting, he took firm steps towards her. Any enemy of Vought was an enemy of his, and Mr. Edgar had given him clear orders. She was to be either detained or eliminated.

As he moved towards her, she held still. She watched him approach, and he almost faltered at the intensity of her gaze, the total lack of fear in her awfully familiar eyes.

The eyes that were blazed in his mind since that night at the gala…

Shaking his head of those thoughts, he focused on the task at hand. As he reached her, he wrapped his fingers around her neck hoisting her off the ground.

Sarah felt the characteristic surge of warmth and energy surge through her chest and outwards through her limbs. She placed her palm against his chest plate, feeling it melt under her touch. Finally, she let go. The sudden transfer of energy sent him flying backwards and through a server which crackled and beeped loudly as it went offline.

Noir stepped out of the wrecked device and looked at her before rushing to the side and slamming her through another server. She literally burnt a hole through the tower and looked back at him through the opening. Sarah almost laughed, immediately hoisting herself up off the pavement. She felt a surge of energy and climbed to the top where he met her.

She took a standard fighting position, ready for anything he’d send her way. It’d been some time since she’d fought, and this would be the first time she’d be challenged by someone of equal strength. There was no holding back here, on either side.

And she’d get the thumb drive back no matter what.

Again, he was the first to move in with a punch aimed straight for her head. Sliding under his outstretched arm, she kicked his knee hard and punched him in the stomach before backing away.

Reaching down, she took a dagger into hand and threw it his way, nicking his cheek. If she’d wanted to she could have sent it flying into his skull, although that too wouldn’t have been enough to stop him. Still, it had been a warning.

The fight went on, equal forces clashing against one another.

But then he caught her in a chokehold that she couldn’t escape. She wouldn’t allow him to end her or put her to sleep and have her captured. There was no way in hell it would all end here, this way.

She focused on her anger, on the pain, on her mother and father’s faces. Her mind conjured butterflies in the air around her and she followed their intricate dances intently. She smelled the smoke, felt the ashes softly coating her cheeks.

As he held her close, slowly cutting off her air supply, Black Noir came to a sudden realization. The sudden whiff of vanilla conditioning cream made him still. Her eyes. Her scent.

And then she let go, and the air around them exploded like a set of bombs.

When the dust settled, and she opened her eyes, she searched for Noir afraid of what she’d find. She found him among the wreckage, lying on his back a hand to his side.

She rushed over and cautiously kneeled beside him. She stayed alert, knowing he could kill her even in an impaired state, be it by a silent dagger or the snap of her neck.

He reached one hand up to her cheek, and she knew he’d connected the dots. Everything would be different now. Her cover was blown.

But then he did something that took her by surprise: one hand slipped into a pocket, and instead of the expected dagger, he extracted a slightly fuming, still intact thumb drive.

He held it up for her to take and signed a simple word. She nodded and squeezed his hand with her own before standing and running away. The blast had destroyed a part of the servers and it had sent the security alarms blaring. Red lights flashed in the corridors she ran down to reach the back entrance she’d used to get in.

Her brain ran even faster, thoughts clouding her senses. Ultimately, she shut them all out. She cleared her mind of everything but the thumb drive in her hand.

She thought back to Noir’s advice, or maybe threat. The one simple word he’d signed.

“Run.”

MASTERLIST

Tag list: @ateliefloresdaprimavera @ellejo @dust-bun @coco724 @proximio-5 @damiminator @omegahighendpro @rpgluvr95 @sweetrabbitteamx @rayray1463

#the boys #the boys tv #the boys amazon #black noir #the boys season 2 #fanfiction #oc story #romance #black noir x oc

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marueonmain · 5 years ago

Text

WINDFLOWER

part eight ~ the chance to pipe ~

(part one) (part two) (part three) (part four) (part five) (part six) (part seven) (part eight)

A/N: We are in it now; thank you for sticking around. Messages/Asks are open and greatly appreciated.

Summary: Alex seeks Will’s support and advice for how best to shoot his shot with Y/N. He also takes his first shower in 72 hours.

Pairing: imallexx x reader

Warning: Language.

Word Count: 2.6k

He arrived at Will's apartment, still wearing the mindless grin that Y/N coaxed out of him. Alex walked through the unlocked front door and straight to his friend's bedroom. It was bright, not near as cave-like as his own, and there was the lingering scent of a candle burned recently. Will sat at his desk: a second chair set-up next to him: scrolling through the youtube analytics for his most recent video.

It seemed that CPM was up – good news for the video and its one-million views. Will cleared his throat, causing Alex to freeze just two steps inside. Without lifting his head or dragging his attention from his screen, Will said with a flat and ominous tone, "I warned yous."

"What?"

"About being late." Spinning his chair, Will revealed the blue spray-painted plastic bat sitting in his lap. He kept his stern face for another five seconds before breaking into his usual toothy smile and laugh.

Rather than scrambling together a witty remark in return, Alex chuckled along. To that gag as well as the other usual playful abuse about his laziness and tardiness. Will finished the last one-liner he had prepared in the extra time he was made to wait for Alex to arrive, and his expression faltered. Not that he did not appear cheerful anymore – the smile remained – but it relaxed as a single eyebrow raised.

Will asked, "What's got you all giddy?"

Looking down at his hands, Alex chuckled again, though it sounded more akin to a humorous scoff, and gave no answer. He buried his hands in his pockets and took the seat next to his friend.

"What is it?" Will pestered on. "James Charles unblocked you, did he?"

Alex punched him in the arm as hard as he could (not hard). "Fuck off."

Will rolled his eyes before turning to the camera. He hit record and, putting on his boisterous presentation voice, shouted, "Right! Hello, welcome back to the second channel – welcome back to oddly satisfying. It's been a..."

Top posts for that month included photos of symmetrical flower arrangements, videos of tape-peelings from miniature canvases, woodworking gifs, beautiful block calligraphy, slow-motion capture of a sewing machine, and animation to fulfill the desire to sharpen a pencil to a perfect point every time. Alex gave out ratings of nines and tens like he had a quota to fill. As the video continued, Will argued the scores with him more and more. None so much as he did with the seven Alex gave to a real shit submission of ping-pong trick shots.

It was not an average filming session (unbeknownst to Will); it was a game where with each passing minute, Alex was building up his courage for what he wanted to talk about after the video was over. George had been the one person in the friend group he told about his feelings for Y/N, and that had not gone over well. But Alex thought he might now be able to explain it better – explain himself better – and be supported. Will was, after all, behind the act of snakelike behaviour, a very caring person who had held Alex's hand while he fixed himself several times over.

"What do you give the paw-print painting then, Alex?"

"Hm?" Torn from the bed of his subconscious thoughts into the waking world, Alex darted his eyes to the screen and to the camera. "Uh, ten. Definitely a ten."

"Right. Anyway, we'll end on a good note. Be sure to hit that like button for more reddit videos and go subscribe to Alex's channel—"

"It's really epic!"

"—link will be in the description. And we'll see you guys later!" Will gave a terse salute to the camera and, once the outro was finished, dropped his voice to normal and asked, "Care to do a second one while we're here?"

"Why not?"

Springing from his chair to his feet, Will crossed the bedroom to his cupboard and began to change. Giving the illusion of there being a more significant passage of time between filming. Taking off his beanie revealed his dark unruly hair, which he covered again with his 'crisis actor' hat.

"I was wondering if I could get your advice on something?" Alex began not moving from his seat at the desk. Neither did he turn his attention much from the screen, to give Will some privacy.

"What's that?"

"There's this girl— Well, um, this woman rather, that I am interested in approaching – romantically – and—"

"Why you talking like an android?" Will stripped himself of his black and green shirt. Interestingly enough, the same black and green shirt as Ethan wore when he last had the sidemen member over for a video. "Could you be normal for a minute?"

"I like her. Ok? What now?"

He pulled on a shovel hoodie and grabbing another turned to Alex. Gesturing to the pink zip-up jacket, he asked, "You have a decent shirt under there or want to borrow one of these?"

"I'm fine. But about the girl. Should I even bother?"

"How do you mean? If there's the chance to pipe – you got to take it."

"No. Like if I just end up fucking it up, why—?"

"Stop thinking about the end. We're at the beginning, alright? You're a good-looking lad, even got a decent trim for once in your life." Will ruffled Alex's hair as he returned to the seat beside him. "You're verified. All you got to do is slide into the lass' twitter DMs, and you're in."

"I'm not verified," he said with a bit of a huff. "You're verified."

Will shrugged. Pulling his phone from his pocket to check messages. "Whatever. You ready to record?"

"Not yet. What if she has a boyfriend?"

"Chin him."

"I'm being serious."

"So am I. If there's not a ring and a date...well...it isn't really all that important, is it?" Will scrolled through the next ten posts on r/oddlysatisfying, before changing his mind, scrolling back up, and switching to another subreddit. Adding to his previous comment, "Unless it's Mia we're talking about."

Alex sucked his teeth. "Unfortunately, it is."

"Shut it. I'm having none of that." He pushed Alex's shoulder with one hand and wagged a jokingly accusatory finger. "Let's get back to it."

"Alright. Alright."

Will turned to the camera and, as quickly as he had dropped it, picked up his presentation voice, shouting, "Right! Hello, welcome back to this incredibly ad-friendly youtube channel. Instead of rating sand-cutting and slime, today we're gonna be rating dogs again. So this, welcome to r/aww. There should be some decent content here..."

It was nice sifting through the top posts of the week: a golden retriever taking care of baby bunnies, deer fawns sleeping under lawn furniture, an albino skunk, and a lot more ducklings and birds in general than Alex remembered being popular on the subreddit. Their last filming was full of constant challenges and debates, but when Alex gave nine and ten ratings for animals Will agreed whole-heartedly – save for a single dispute over a cat picture. It was cute; Will just was not terribly fond of cats.

Alex simultaneously commentated for the video and pondered – now that he had his friend's blessing – how best to shoot his shot with Y/N. He beamed with excitement and energy, and the evidence was in the light blush of his cheeks. It was not soft happiness like he felt when sitting on the rooftop of his apartment building, with a sausage roll in his stomach and a decent buzz. It was sharp happiness like the entire world had been dragged into photoshop and had the contrast shot right up to one hundred. All the dust from the corners of his mind was gathered, swept up, dumped in a bin, and set ablaze.

Before Alex could think of anything, it was the end of the video.

"Thank you very much for watching! Hope you enjoyed. Check-out Alex's channel and the WillNE main channel, links in the description, and we'll see you guys later." Will stopped the recording, dropped the act, and pulled out his phone again. There were dozens of messages; his fingers flew across the keyboard, shooting off response after response. "Thanks for helping out the cause."

Alex returned Will's fist-bump. He stood from his chair just to walk the single step and sit on the edge of Will's bed. Any distance would do in helping him ease into the details of his situation; after all, it was not just any woman that he was after.

He started, attempting to sound casual, as if the topic was organic, "What do you think about Re—?"

"Red and Sammy?" Will asked distractedly. Believing he had finished the question how Alex meant to, he took it upon himself to answer it as well, "Haven't met Red to be fair, but Sammy is a solid bloke."

"You think?"

"Yeah, Gee wanted to rearrange some furniture, and Josh and I were useless. I rang Sammy, he came round, practically moved everything himself – even brought beers. You did well good picking him, Lex."

At what was likely intended to be a genuine compliment, Alex felt himself shifting a single step closer to his internal self-destruct button. Of course, Alex knew. He knew that it was not healthy for his mind or mood to be so fragile or rather so easily swayed, but there he was – fuming with misplaced anger.

How could he tell Will? How could he explain he wanted a chance with one of their mates’ girlfriends without coming off as a bad person? Was he a bad person?

Did he care? When he came into the world running a race where he was made to wear sandals while everyone else got trainers. Alex stood from the bed and readied to leave.

Attempting to lighten the mood despite likely not knowing why it dimmed, Will added, standing to throw an arm around Alex's shoulders, "And who said you have no friends?"

"You do."

Will chuckled. "Huh, I must be dead smart me."

"Alright, well..." He intentionally trailed off, ducking from under his friend's arm.

"Are you off?"

"Yeah, I'll sees you later." Alex left the bedroom with quicker and heavier steps than was his usual gait; the difference, however, was not enough for someone outside himself to notice. It was frustration. It was: a set jaw. : an unnatural heat rising from his core to all his extremities. : and a mouth pinched smaller than what seems humanely possible.

If he were a 2D cartoon character, as comments under all his videos would suggest, his irises would be redrawn in the shape of flames. Steam might have even come from his ears.

George likes Sammy. Will likes Sammy. James (or at least drunk James who met him) likes Sammy.

And Alex wanted to steal his girlfriend. Fuck.

He raced through the flat to the front door; just through the threshold and into the hall, he stopped. Waiting to hear the latch bolt behind him. Like the clap of a hypnotherapist bringing their patient back from a breakthrough session – the sound drained him of his anger.

It was not helpful to him to be angry at the situation: angry with himself.

Alex walked the hall to the lift and stepped in. During his descent, he looked at the warped reflection of himself in the metal doors: the prickle of hair on his upper lip, the trim which was different but somehow identical to all his previous, a picture in pink – and also red.

It was the reflection of a man. Despite how his followers portrayed him in collages and fanfics, he was an adult man. Confronting that distorted image altered his perception: what he knew himself to look like: his conscious image.

How interesting he must look in the strange light of an average person's perception. How confused. How tired.

DING of the sliding doors opening, ripped his warped reflection in half. Alex exited half-expecting for Y/N to be there on the other side, considering she was everywhere recently. Luckily, she was not. But that fleeting thought of Y/N snowballed as he walked the hall to his apartment. Outside the door, he stopped and stood Blair Witch style facing it but not moving to unlock it or get the key from his pocket just yet.

Y/N. Alex thought of Y/N. Thought of first meeting her with her cute ears and flushed face. How she doted on Sammy. Thought of speaking with her in the foyer with her calm aurora and chin-hugging top. How he wanted nothing more than to be cute with her – for them to have a song.

Thought of when she was making waffles with shaking hands and a little wrinkle between her eyebrows. How she dodged his questions. Thought of ~the dream~ and how different he would act if it were real.

He rummaged through his pockets to find his key. When he did, he shoved it in and pulled it out the lock with an equal amount of unnecessary force.

It was late.

Alex had been awake over twenty-four hours, and he wanted – needed – he just needed it to stop. Unable to handle consciousness much longer, he dragged his feet along the straight shot to his bedroom. And into his bathroom.

Not particularly a nighttime shower type of person, Nor a morning shower type of person, Alex was more a when-I-want-to-or-remember-to-shower type of person.

During slight depressive slumps, however, the more accurate category for him would be a once-the-grease-starts-to-drip-off-my-hair-that-is-when-I-will-shower type of person.

Stepping under the showerhead, the warm water wrapped around him. Pelted down on the pale skin of his shoulders and back, relaxing the muscles there. Slender fingers racked shampoo through his tangled hair: it smelled like almonds. Like artificial almonds designed by chemists who had never seen or smelt an almond before. It was nice.

He ducked his head to rinse out the suds and lost his balance, falling forward a bit. Catching himself with his hands on the wall in front of him; it jolted him out from under his somnambulism spell.

Hopping out of the shower, he dried off and wrapped his single towel around his waist. There in the mirror above the sink were those little prickles of a moustache. Alex stepped up, took his razor in his right hand, grabbed the shaving foam off the counter with the left, and looked to his right again to find he had dropped the razor in the sink. His brain was too exhausted to focus on more than one thought – more than one task at a time.

With less than six flicks of the wrist, his upper lip was clean-shaven, and he was trudging along to his bedroom. Alex let his towel drop to the floor; he tugged on a clean pair of pajama bottoms and pitched himself from the other side of the room onto his bed.

"Ow," he muttered to his aching bones. Alex closed his eyes, and for the first time since ~the dream~ appreciated the contemplative silence of his bedroom – and of his head.

Taglist: (message to join!) @angelbabyivy

#imallexx #imallexx imagine #imallexx x reader #alex elmslie #alex elmslie imagine #alex elmslie x reader #eboys #commentary crew #internet sensation #willne

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birlcholtz · 5 years ago

Note

How about snowy and parse?

S N A R S E

okay so. it starts after That One Game. you know the one. the one where parse rushes the goal, almost injures snowy, and promptly gets dogpiled by half of the falconers and a decent number of aces as well (to be fair, his teammates weren't aiming for him). tater yanks him out of it by the jersey, parse feels a little too much like a lost kitten, and then all of a sudden he's halfway across the ice (tater pushed him)

WELL. that night parse watches a replay of it on espn because he doesn't know how to take a break from hockey and he's like oh damn. oh damn i really did almost hurt snow. that's rough. and he decides he's gotta figure out some way to talk to snow so he can apologize

so he instagram DMs him

(let it be known parse's instagram is about one quarter thirst traps, one quarter pics of him and kit, and fully one half of just kit. snowy doesn't post as often and he's a bit more professional about the whole thing— like, lots of pictures with teammates, pics of the rink and of cool places in providence, but his captions are works of art)

snowy also posts the occasional espn screencap of tater in the sin bin and chirps him brutally in the caption. once he quotes cell block tango and the approximately 10 people who are into both hockey and musical theater go wild

okay enough about their respective instagrams. my pOINT is that parse ig dms snowy, who is mildly ashamed to admit (to himself, not out loud, never out loud) that his genuine first thought was 'wow kent parson is sliding into my dms'

and parse is like hey sorry i rushed you in that game, didn't realize how risky it was until i saw a replay later

and snowy can't help being his sardonic self and winds up sending back something witty and then parse replies and then snowy replies again and before either of them know it they're having a Conversation that they're actually?? both enjoying??

at one point snowy admits he likes cats and he immediately regrets it because parse sends him 6 videos of kit immediately, like within 5 seconds, but then he watches the videos and finds himself unwillingly liking them and then he finds himself requesting more and snowy is like what the fuck is happening in my brain but parse supplies 8 more cat videos and he watches all of them and comments on each one

he also reveals his sister has a cat and parse makes him promise to send photos and/or videos next time he sees her

they DM each other all the time until they finally just exchange phone numbers and at one point parse is like snow. dustin. can u facetime rn i need ur thoughts on kits halloween costume and snowy's like sure why not and that starts a tradition of facetiming every so often that eventually becomes less and less about kit

snowy is preeeeetty sure that jack and parse were together in juniors but he's never confirmed it because that's not his business you know? but he finds himself thinking more and more about whether parse might be into guys. but pride night w the falcs happens and he finds himself sending parse a pic of his newly rainbow-taped stick and adding 'best stick tape' after it

a few minutes later parse replies with a thumbs up and says 'i firmly agree' and they both breathe a little easier

also a few days later snowy accidentally likes one of parse's thirst trap pics from 6 months ago (shirtless pic on the balcony of his apartment) and he immediately unlikes it but it's too late parse sends him a screenshot of his notifications with the most recent one being snowy liking that post, and he also sends a ;) and snowy's like oh. my fucking god. and he replies 'jealous that u actually get to see the sun year round'

and parse reads it and starts typing and stops typing and starts typing and stops typing and eventually thinks 'fuck it' and sends a whole string of winky faces

so snowy's like fine. let's do this. and then this string of conversations happens:

snowy: jack what's your process for taking thirst trap selfies for instagram

jack: what's my process for... what???? what's a thirst trap

snowy: never mind ask bitty

snowy: tater how do i take thirst trap selfies for instagram

(tater is a lot more helpful and snowy relates his conversation with jack and tater chirps jack endlessly for it. at one point jack is like I'M ESL TOO TATER and tater's like YOU HAVE DEGREE FROM SAMWELL. IN THE UNITED STATES.)

so a few days later snowy (with mild trepidation) posts a fairly subtle post-workout pic (jack may not know what a thirst trap is but that doesn't mean half his instagram isn't full of them. snowy has observed the techniques of the master)

his comments explode but he doesn't care. parse likes the pic and snowy screenshots it INSTANTLY (he may have been constantly checking his notifications for this specifically) and sends it to parse like 'not so smug now are you' and parse spends literally 10 minutes trying to come up with a witty response

anyway eventually the sexual tension explodes, neither of them are out so they still have to be kinda. under the radar. but sending cat pictures is their love language, snowy funnels some jam and pie to parse, they argue about kombucha, half their conversations are still chirping but we all know what chirping is, eventually parse does meet snowy's sister's cat and it's amazing, they're approximately the same size so they do share and swap clothes (never anything with team logos on it, even once they're out, because the Disloyalty), jack is literally never questioned about his history with parse again because everyone's more curious about what it's like when parse and snowy play each other. especially since parse is a forward and snowy is a goalie. (there are some truly horrific 'score' jokes made in both locker rooms, and by horrific i mean so unfunny that they're hilarious)

tater is not allowed to answer questions about parse and snowy anymore because once some reporter did ask him and he said 'good for them but i think snowy can do better' and it went viral (bitty texted him 16 crying laughing emojis)

holidays and vacations with parse and snowy look like this: sweatpants in the winter and matching sunglasses in the summer, falling asleep together on the couch, cat toys literally everywhere, more arguing about kombucha, parse teaching snowy the finer points of instagram thirst traps and immediately regretting it, watching terrible horror movies together, adopting more cats

you have two wolves inside of you. one says 'parsnow'. the other says 'snarse'. also known as help i'm laughing my ass off about 'snarse'

so he instagram DMs him

and parse is like hey sorry i rushed you in that game, didn't realize how risky it was until i saw a replay later

he also reveals his sister has a cat and parse makes him promise to send photos and/or videos next time he sees her

a few minutes later parse replies with a thumbs up and says 'i firmly agree' and they both breathe a little easier

and parse reads it and starts typing and stops typing and starts typing and stops typing and eventually thinks 'fuck it' and sends a whole string of winky faces

so snowy's like fine. let's do this. and then this string of conversations happens:

snowy: jack what's your process for taking thirst trap selfies for instagram

jack: what's my process for... what???? what's a thirst trap

snowy: never mind ask bitty

snowy: tater how do i take thirst trap selfies for instagram

#parsnow #fun with rarepairs #omgcp

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wedreamedlove · 5 years ago

Text

[FIC] Liminal Spaces (v.1)

Rating: M Characters: Xu Mo/Reader/Ares Word Count: 3391

Tags: 3P. Kissing. Petting. Angst. Jealousy.

Notes: The spiritual successor to KISS. Ares from Chapters 20-24 and loosely inspired by this comic. Xu Mo before Chapter 13.

Summary: This was all Ares' fault. He enjoyed testing you too much and the friction between your two powers, or whatever he was experimenting with, transported the two of you elsewhere.

You've been through so much though that waking in a pocket dimension doesn't even phase you anymore. However, you certainly weren't expecting a certain someone from your past. To make matters worse, there's no way out and no clues except for a puzzling piece of paper.

Consciousness slips back into you and you stir on something slightly hard, but which doesn't feel like the floor either. The last thing you remember was trying to tear apart the dark thread in the white of your mind when you felt the tide of Ares' power come towards you.

Then there was the sound of something shattering and then... nothing.

You gather your hands beneath you, ready to push yourself up, when you hear your name.

Turning your head your breath catches at the achingly familiar sight of Xu Mo in his white coat across the room. His eyes, looking like dabbed ink, gaze at you with concern.

"Xu---" You start to rise, the syllables of his name flowing off your tongue naturally as if you had never stopped saying his name. But you don't get to finish before you feel a leather-clad hand grip your nape and press you down tightly into the chest below you.

"Surname Xu..." The cool voice that slides into your ear is stripped of emotion and that's precisely what makes your hair stand on end. The hand on the back of your neck slides around to grip your chin and, as Ares sits up from beneath you, he angles your head up to bring you face-to-face with him. Frozen ink-purple eyes bore into you. "The person most important to you?"

"Remove your hand."

Ares' eyes slice over to Xu Mo and the two of them pause for a second, a flicker of surprise appearing and then being suppressed when they take in each other's appearance.

"Ares, let go." Your words come out even and coated in steel.

He returns his focus to you and you see contemplation give way to mirth in his eyes. He removes his hand from your chin and gets up in a smooth motion, half-carrying you to your feet.

Before you can move anywhere though you feel his gloved hand on your head, stroking your hair down to the back of your neck where it rests again. The gentle pressure is more than enough to hold you in place.

Xu Mo watches this whole interaction in silence before his eyes move back to yours and he asks softly, "Who is this?" But you have a feeling he already knows the answer.

"... This is Ares. Ares, this is Xu Mo."

Ares starts to laugh lowly, the amusement in his eyes growing, and inclines his head towards you. "Xu Mo, ah, Xu Mo... Someone from your past?"

Xu Mo stills.

You press down on the flinch that wants to break out. You already feel like Ares can see through you on normal days, but now it feels like he's split you open with a scalpel and is scrutinizing the intimate, bruised, and soft core of you which you wished he'd never see. This pulsing core which told you quietly whenever Ares was near that he wasn't him. He wasn't him and he would never be him.

You breathe in. Hold your breath. Then release it before asking, "What do you last remember, Xu Mo?"

His expression is shuttered. "We celebrated my birthday."

You close your eyes. Nostalgic memories, which seem to have happened ages ago, are revived in your mind. An entire expanse of starry sky stretching out above your heads. Warm hands holding yours. Foggy breaths mixing in a hushed silence. Snowflakes on eyelashes.

The person in front of you isn't the one you're looking for either. How ironic that in this moment, which is removed from space and time, you're still the one who is out of place.

Sorrow is like a tide around your legs. Some days it's higher and some days it's lower. Right now it's up to your waist and its pull threatens to knock you over and drag you under its waves. But you still struggle to go against it.

"Did you ever visit me in a hospital when I was with Li Zeyan?" You open your eyes and ask this.

"Li Zeyan...?" Xu Mo frowns, looking puzzled.

So, this is a Xu Mo before that fateful day when you found out the truth about him. Phantom pain prickles on your neck and you have to resist the urge to touch it and make sure you aren't bleeding.

"You're from another time," Xu Mo says it as a statement.

"... Mm."

You see him examine you and you try not to imagine the picture you must make with Ares. Both of you are clad in black while Xu Mo is in white. It might have been funny if you didn't already know that what lurked beneath Xu Mo's pleasant mask is an echo of the man beside you.

"She's not from mine either. Quite special, isn't she? The one and only Black Swan Queen," Ares interjects conversationally.

It's at this point that you step forward, shaking off Ares' hand from you, and your look cuts over. "Don't call me that."

He smiles blandly but his lack of further action shows that he's accepted your warning for what it is. He knows you hate to be called that title.

Xu Mo's eyes flicker, "What are you using her for?"

"Do you even need to ask? Exactly what you would be using her for," Ares answers and his smile blooms like a poisonous flower, beautiful but deadly.

"I'm cooperating willingly," You correct.

Xu Mo looks at you and you hold his stare.

"I don't agree with him. I don't agree with you either. But if I can lower the number of people who would get hurt then I can't stand aside and do nothing."

Memories of that coliseum and the cries, yells, screams, and the iron scent of blood and wetness on your hands crowd into your mind. Long practice had you shoving those memories out in a blink.

"What happened?" Xu Mo asks though as if he sees through you just as Ares does.

His gentleness nearly breaks you but you shake your head.

Xu Mo falls silent for a beat before he speaks again, directing his words this time to Ares, although a strange expression crosses his face as he says the name. "Ares, she's more important than you know. You see it too, don't you? Continue on as you are and it'll just dim more."

His words make no sense to you but when you look over to Ares you see the ruthless ice in his eyes crack for the first time and a fine tremble runs through his arms before he clenches his fist to restrain it. The creak of leather is loud in the quiet of the room.

"What do you know?" Ares' voice is flat but echoes with violence.

The smile that appears on Xu Mo's face is like an unsheathed blade. "Do you even need to ask?"

Ares raises his hand---

That's when you step in physically, looking between the two of them. "Stop! We should be looking for a way out of here, not fighting each other."

Xu Mo slides both of his hands into the pockets of his coat and inclines his head to you with a kind smile, "You're right. I'm sorry."

Ares only lowers his hand after he sees Xu Mo's actions. His lips twist down into a second of a frown before he makes a demand to you. "Come here."

You ignore him though, much to Xu Mo's soft laughter. Having gotten both of their agreements not to fight, you break away to explore the room. It's a disorienting pure white which would normally make you lose your bearings but, for some reason, you can still see the walls and corners of the room which gives it a sense of dimension. However, there's no doors, windows, or anything to give you a clue as to how to get out.

Xu Mo and Ares are doing their own exploration, the two of them keeping a pointed distance away from each other with you in the center, but it doesn't look like they've found anything either.

Just as you're about to wonder if you and Ares need to re-create the circumstances that brought you two here you step on something that crinkles.

"I found something!" You exclaim as you bend down to pick up the piece of paper that was also pure white and had blended into the floor until you stepped on it.

Both of them come beside you when you turn the paper over and discover that there's writing on this side.

"Everyone must agree on one thing...?" You read it out loud, puzzled. "Isn't that easy? We all want to get out of here and go back to where we were, right?"

Xu Mo hums thoughtfully from your right. Ares is silent on your left. You wait a few seconds for something to happen but nothing does.

"Um... why isn't anything happening?"

Ares chuckles and then raises an eyebrow when you look over. "Shouldn't you ask yourself that? Do you really wish to go back? Or perhaps you secretly want to stay here with him."

You cross your arms and ignore how defensive that makes you look. "You're one to talk. I'm sure you don't want to pass on this chance to pick Xu Mo's brain."

If one genius was already terrifying in all his forms then what would the two same geniuses do together? Fortunately, you're a bit relieved that, for some reason, the two of them were antagonistic towards each other from the start.

Ares looks over your head to Xu Mo on your other side. "I won't deny that."

You follow his line of sight to Xu Mo, who casts his eyes down. His eyelashes cover the emotions in his eyes. "To be honest, I'd like to know more about what happened to you." Between us goes unsaid.

"Is there a point? We don't even know if we'll keep our memories of this place," You say with a laugh to cover how you press your arms tighter into yourself.

Xu Mo raises his eyes and something surges within their depths as he looks at you. He reaches out and brushes the back of a finger against the corner of your eye and down your cheek. You reflexively blink at the action. You aren't crying. You know you aren't crying right now. But why does it feel like he's tracing the trail of tears you spilled before?

Your careful expression collapses and you don't know what sort of face you have, but it makes Xu Mo pull you into his arms and then you're enveloped in his embrace. The faint scent of grasslands after a rain shower reaches your nose and it's this familiarity which makes your eyes burn.

He wasn't him. But he was close. An earlier shade of the man you know and miss even after everything that happened between you two. The man who would cut you to pieces at a conference, but also take you back to his home for one last movie together.

"I don't know what I'm going to do," Xu Mo murmurs beside your ear. He pauses for a moment before sighing lightly, "But I'm sorry."

"No you aren't," Your response is muffled due to his shirt and the sting in your nose.

His chest vibrates against you from his silent laugh. "I won't regret my actions, no, but I can regret whatever pain it brings to you."

Xu Mo presses his lips against the crown of your head and closes his arms around you tighter. In your head, you tell yourself that you can have this one moment. If, like you said, no one will have memories of this place then you can indulge in his words and this dream, can't you?

Ares cuts in just as you're about to hug Xu Mo back. "I know what we can all agree on."

You startle in Xu Mo's arms, having forgotten Ares' presence for a second with how quiet he had been. You look over your shoulder to see him studying the two of you with unreadable emotions in his eyes.

But then he looks to Xu Mo and the corners of his lips rise into a challenging smirk. "Well?"

Xu Mo appraises Ares before he squeezes you gently and laughs. "Yes, of course I'd agree to this."

You can't read the undercurrent of conversation between the two and can only look back and forth in confusion. In fact, it sounded as if there was another meaning to Xu Mo's words. What is everyone going to agree on? Why are they suddenly so cooperative?

~~~

Some time later, you're still not sure how you got into this situation and what it has to do with getting out of this room.

You're in Ares' lap, facing him. The floor beneath him is covered by both his and Xu Mo's jackets and the white and black fabric mix together to provide a fascinating contrast. Not that you can appreciate it right now as lips trail down your neck and, despite their coolness, Ares' breath is hot when it spills over your skin. Your hands, which are gripping his shoulders, tremble and you struggle to find your voice.

"Wait, wait, I'm still confused. How is this going to get us out?"

"We can all agree that you're special," Xu Mo answers from behind you in a low voice beside your ear.

"And---" Your breath stutters when he splays a hand over your rib cage and his thumb brushes the underside of your breast. "---if I don't agree?"

"Then I suppose we'll have to get you to agree to wanting this," Ares is the one who answers this time before he raises his head and kisses you.

His tongue pries into your mouth with an indomitable force and his hand, ungloved now, grips the back of your head to keep you in place. It's an oppressive and dizzying kiss, stealing your senses and trying to ensnare your soul, and even when you reflexively push against him for air he doesn't let up. He angles the kiss deeper, laying claim to everything inside your mouth with his tongue.

Finally, when he releases you and you fall backwards into Xu Mo's chest, shoulders heaving as you pant, Ares raises a thumb to wipe the wetness on his lips. His eyes are dark to the point where you can barely see a hint of purple in them.

Before you can react further though, your head is suddenly turned to the side with a light hold on your chin and Xu Mo kisses you.

He caresses your lips gently with his, soothing their raw state from Ares' pressure, and doesn't push any further, just brushes his lips over yours again and again and again until you reach back to curl a hand around his nape and pull him into a kiss. You feel a smile against your mouth before he obliges you and deepens the kiss.

His tongue strokes lightly against yours and the tenderness ignites a slow warmth at the pit of your stomach. You clench your legs instinctively and hear a low grunt from Ares; but soon enough Ares reaches behind you to pull at the laces of your dress. You break away from Xu Mo's kiss to gasp, but he immediately presses forward to seal your lips together again, swallowing your surprise.

He only pulls back enough to murmur, "Breathe through your nose," a smile in his voice, before he kisses you again. You feel one of his hands cup your cheek, fingers curling to brush against the sensitive skin behind your ear, and you lean into him with a tremor.

It's only when his other hand on your rib cage moves up to cup your breast, making you instinctively arch into that gentle touch, that you realize you're bare up there. The laces of your dress had been undone by Ares and, at some point, the top had pooled down to your waist. Embarrassment mixes with the haze of pleasure, but you're unable to do anything but close your eyes at Xu Mo's caresses.

He ends the kiss and turns his head to the side slightly, leaving you to breathe raggedly against his cheek, and watches Ares.

"Bright, isn't it?" Xu Mo asks.

Ares moves his gaze off of your chest with what seems like effort to glance at Xu Mo. "Are you trying to change my mind?"

"Would you change your mind?" It's a rhetorical question which they both know the answer to. "I'm simply providing you with all the facts so that you can make an informed decision."

A muscle jumps in Ares' cheek before he chooses to keep silent and slides the hand he has on your thigh up, dragging the hem of your dress along with his movement, until your underwear comes into view.

This snaps you out of your daze and you seize Ares' wrist with a hand. He stills beneath your touch and his eyes flash towards yours, brimming with something dark and heavy.

"Shhh," Xu Mo soothes you, feeling you tremble under the weight of Ares' eyes, and then his voice becomes firm when he calls out to his other self. "Ares."

Ares' shoulders twitch at hearing his name in that tone and he closes his eyes tightly, creating a deep furrow between his brows, before he sighs and draws back the hand in your grip and flips his hand around so that he's holding yours instead. Before you can react, he then brings your hand to his groin and presses it against an obvious hardness.

Your gaze flies up from your joined hands to his and you stop breathing when you see the ice in Ares' eyes thaw, revealing hints of a lost look in the depths of those dark purple lakes.

Ares releases his hand from yours, letting you decide whether to keep it there or not, and wraps both arms around your waist before he lowers his head to press it into your sternum. You feel his lips move against your skin more than you hear him say in a hoarse voice, "Don't reject me this time."

Neither of the men move as they wait on your decision. Xu Mo is a quiet and calm presence behind you with both hands having dropped to your hips, below Ares' arms, and drawing calming circles there. Ares keeps his embrace tight but not painful and he just breathes against you, forehead pressed to your chest.

Behind you is the man that he once was. In front of you is the man that he could have been. You might have tried to delude yourself with reasons and justifications for why you're with Ares or why you let them continue to this point, but you know the truth. The answer in your heart is that no matter the world, the time, the form, all these versions of him were still him and somehow, before you knew it, his soul and your soul had been bound together forever with a red string.

Emotions really did cause people to fall into traps. But it was much too late for you and him to escape this emotion called love. Closing your eyes, you let yourself go and free fall.

Feeling your body relax, Xu Mo exhales a hot breath against your ear --- Ares exhales a hot breath against your chest --- and you feel Xu Mo's hand move down --- and you feel Ares trail his lips to the swell of a breast --- Xu Mo slides his fingers beneath your underwear --- Ares wraps his mouth around a swollen tip --- Xu Mo grazes your wet and aching core and then---

---you wake up in a bed.

You stare up at the white ceiling, feeling your head pound with a sudden onset of fatigue, but your body is flush with arousal and you can still remember what had nearly happened. Turning your stiff neck, you see that you're in a hospital room, which doesn't help orient you at all.

Did you return with Ares? Or are you some place else?

Suddenly, you feel a presence outside the room. There's a knock on the door and then a familiar voice which you had just heard seconds ago asks, "Are you awake? May I come in?"

#love and producer #mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mlqc xu mo #mlqc lucien #mlqc fanfic #oops i realized his hot spring date comes after rainy night...#NOT IN THIS WORLD everything is pre-13 lolol #who is it at the door??#depends on whether you want soft love or rough love-- lolol

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