#also why the hashish scene what was the point?

[lady-of-the-lotus]

wait you don't like novel xy? why not? 🤔

I should probably say I don't like the parts of him I've actually read or seen excerpts of.

I simply don't jibe with him.Much as I love me my villains, I don't wholeheartedly embrace all shapes and forms and draw the line at certain crimes and threats for personal reasons. Also, I actually usually get really into villains who are more along the lines of Loki, Magneto (#Magnetowasright), Erik (Phantom), Count Fosco (The Woman in White--one of my all-time favorite characters)--and from what I've seen of novel!XY, he's even further from my usual type than the cql version.

In short, there was some "that's too much for me" and there was no emotional clicking to compensate. I might like him better if I read the I-assume-better-translated version of him in the official novels. I very much rely on writing style and realistic dialogue when it comes to books, which is why I find it hard to connect to anyone in poor translations, no matter how good the original work. I recently gave up on The Man in the Iron Mask halfway through to wait for a different translation to come into the library as the one I was reading (from a major classics publisher!) was so poor as to be distracting. (Still bitter about how that one got published.)

I'm sure people have great reasons for liking novel!XY and am glad he made enough of an impression on readers for him to get the screen time he did in cql!

[a-trick-or-two-with-lepers]

Hair (1979) Soundtrack Personal Ranking

I have fallen in LOVE with this musical; particularly the movie version. It encapsulates its message of peace and love in the time of war very well in my opinion. Since I'm also a freak for numbered lists, I've decided to rank the songs from my least to most favorite. Even my least favorite songs make me bob my head a little. This is a very groovy movie and everybody should watch it a least once. I'm going to be ranking these songs based on sound and meaning alone, rather than including the filmography of the scenes that go along with them, just to make things a bit fairer.

19. Hashish - This is less of a song and more of a chanting of the names of different drugs. The walking bassline and lackadaisical percussion are reminiscent of the effects of depressant drugs, which is pretty cool.

18. LBJ/Initials - This is a pretty short song, and I don’t have much to say about it. It doesn’t have many lyrics. I don’t care to know much about history, but evidently LBJ did become a hippy of sorts, which is interesting.

17. Sodomy - Whenever I hear this song, I always imagine two things: one, the faces of the audiences hearing this on stage for the first time were probably hilarious, and two, someone who doesn’t speak English probably thinks this song is beautiful and pure. The main vocals provided are really pretty, and the same goes for the instrumentation and background vocals. However, the lyrics are rather shocking. Woof literally just says the most heinous sexual words he can think of, and then questions why they evoke such disgust in people. In his opinion, which reflects the opinions of many hippies during this time, these words represent joy and good feelings among humans, so he doesn’t understand why so many people call them “dirty.” Although, I’m not sure why pederasty is included in this song. The relationships that word represents truly ARE nasty… 

16. Colored Spade - So. I’m white. I couldn’t nor would I ever want to sing the lyrics to this song, considering they literally just consist of every black slur under the sun. However, they are sung by black people, along with stereotypes associated with their race. It is genuinely a progressive song if you look at it a certain way, considering they are diminishing the importance of these words that have been used derogatorily against them. Additionally, Dorsey Wright’s voice here is fantastic. He sounds like a young Louis Armstrong in some parts, and he was just out of high school! I can fully understand how some people might feel uncomfortable with this song- I definitely do- but I think that’s the point. These words have been used to make black people uncomfortable for so many years, so by reclaiming them and using them satirically, the black folks in this song make everyone else feel uncomfortable for using them.

15. 3-5-0-0 - This is a really impactful protest song. I wouldn’t put it on my playlists or anything, but I can’t say it doesn’t hold a lot of meaning.

14. Electric Blues - This song is really interesting. It’s fully rebellious, and the fusion of R&B, rock, and jazz is just so, well, groovy! The bass and keyboard really shine in this song. If I were at a gathering in central park and this song was being performed, I’d be losing all my inhibitions and vibing with the crowd.

13. Good Morning Starshine - This one makes me want to ride down a highway in a roofless car with my homies. Although, I’d probably be sputtering and moving my hair out of my face the whole time. Still a cute song nonetheless. Also, Johnny Depp Willy Wonka reference! Yay!

12. Black Boys/White Boys - I don’t know what to make of this song. It makes me giggle. Especially with how they have the militia men also singing it in the movie. I think that’s supposed to represent how strange it was that men had to be examined by other men to be deemed worthy to fight. It was a similar process to how some women would choose men to sleep with. This song might offend modern viewers, but it was once again progressive for the time. Bi-racial couples weren’t quite accepted by society, so mixed races lusting over each other was about as radical as it got. 

11. Walking in Space - This song is quite the trip. I really like the soloist. I won’t go into an analysis of this song, as it’s so packed with metaphors that I fear it would take me all day, but the footnotes are basically that hippies saw drugs as beautiful, and they didn’t understand why someone would want to end this beauty for others, and they were very, very anti-war. I rather like the verse “To keep us under foot/They bury us in soot/Pretending it’s a chore/To ship us off to war.” 

10. Donna - I spent some time not understanding what this song was about. I found a small analysis online that suggested “Donna,” being a teenager and a virgin, represents the virgin Mary, and rather than looking for an actual young girl to corrupt, Berger is searching for salvation through his actions. This spiritual theme is present in many lines of the song. “I’m evolving through the drugs that you put down” seems to represent how Berger and many others feel closer to God when they are intoxicated. I really like this reading of the song; it makes it much easier to listen to. I’ll admit, I was a bit put off by “16-year-old virgin,” so I was just convincing myself it was okay because it was from a very different time, but thinking of the song this way makes me enjoy it a lot more. It’s a very upbeat and catchy tune. Also, Treat Williams really shows his range here!

9. Hare Krishna - Many hippies believed that chanting this phrase (and also ‘Hare Rama’) would have a direct impact on the soul, as it called upon pleasure and divine femininity. They chant other words with the same phrasing and melody, such as marijuana. This represents how they saw the use of drugs as a spiritual joy that brought pleasure and happiness to the user. It’s a really pretty song.

8. Manchester, England - This song is so much fun! You can tell Claude and Berger really enjoy each others’ presence. A lot of people don’t know what the fuck these lyrics mean, but here’s how I see it: the title itself is sort of a double-meaning. On one hand, Claude comes from a small town in Oklahoma, which is so different from NYC that it might as well be another country. On the other hand, at this point in the film, Claude is tripping balls. Get it? He’s on a trip? Anyway, I really love this song. Some of the references date it a bit, but it was representative of the time. Sometimes I just sing “MANCHESTER, ENGLAND, ENGLAND” for absolutely no reason. Treat Williams really lives up to his name, and John Savage is adorable. 

7. Hair - This song is super delightful. It shows how and why the hippies valued their hair so much: it was a symbol of their freedom, like their own flag. The military and social sensibilities told them to cut their hair, which they saw as oppression. They also sing about how their lifestyles and appearances reflected that of Jesus, who the American military sent them out to fight for. In the opinions of the hippies, Jesus would have agreed with their own lifestyles rather than the lives of those fighting in the war. According to nearly everything the Bible says, this is true. “My hair like Jesus wore it, Hallelujah, I adore it, Hallelujah, Mary loved her son, why don’t my mother love me…”

6. Aquarius - Due to the popularization of this song thanks to The Fifth Dimension band, this is probably the most well-known song from “Hair.” It’s the first song in the movie, and the bass and drums work to get the audience relaxed and excited for what they’re about to see. When the brass comes in, it helps to set the tone of the song, which is optimistic and warm. Then, of course, there is the solo vocalist. Her name is Ren Woods, and her voice is absolutely stunning. She was apparently only 19 when she sang this, and yet her voice sounds at least 30. I’m a sucker for mature voices that emphasize vowels and rhythmic intonation. The lyrics of this song may seem confusing at first to people who don’t know anything about astrology (I’m talking about myself here), but the main message of the song is about the sexual freedom movement that was occuring in the sixties. Despite the name, this movement was about much more than sex. It was about connection, love for one’s neighbors, mutual understanding, and empathy, among other ideas. From what I’ve learned, the ages of the zodiac signs last thousands of years each, and it was said that during the sixties, the Age of Aquarius would begin. This age was meant to bring a sense of peace and harmony to the world, and the hippies/flower children believed their own morals to be in line with this new age. 

5. I’m Black/Ain’t got No - The beginning of this song is so addictive, both instrumentally and vocally. These men proclaim their skin color with self-confidence and joy, and then Claude sings his bit about being invisible. I feel that Claude should have had more characterization in this movie, so I really like that part in particular. Then “Ain’t got No” starts, and I seriously can’t express how much I love this song. It’s almost tear-jerking in how passionate it is; the vocalists here really felt what they were singing (especially Kurt Yaghjian, who was also Annas in JCS 73)!! The hippies sing what they’re constantly told by higher class citizens: that they are lacking, dirty, and worthless. However, they intersperse these comments with what they’re grateful for not having, such as attachments to material possessions that strip them of their individuality. It’s amazing how a song with not much variation in its lyrics and phrasing can be so impactful. I could go on and on about it. 

4. Easy to be Hard - This particular rendition of the song, of all the versions I’ve heard, is my favorite. The soloist here has the most incredible voice, and the key fits her very well. The lyrics mean a lot to me in the context of the movie as well. While the movement the hippies were starting and going along with was morally admirable, the kindness and love they impressed onto the less fortunate did not always translate to their personal lives. Hud abandoned his fiancee and child and verbally abused the former in public. While he may be socially progressive, he was still upholding harmful patriarchal standards in his own life because they benefited him. (I still wish he received more on-screen comeuppance for this, but it is implied that Berger and the gang made him apologize). 

3. Flesh Failures/Let the Sunshine In - Aaaaand this is where the tears begin to flow. Seriously, the entire time this song was playing in the movie I was just sobbing. It’ll probably be my next lyrical analysis. I think this is probably the most impactful moment in the film because of this song. Berger reprising “Manchester, England” broke my heart in two. 

2. I got Life - This song makes me want to jump on a table and sing at the top of my lungs. Of course, I would never do that, what with my following of social norms and safety, but George Berger had no such inhibitions. He is just mesmerizing here, and that is thanks to the spectacular acting of Treat Williams. Just like “Ain’t got No,” this song repeats very similar phrases over and over again, and yet it is one of my favorites in the whole musical. This song almost feels like a sister song to the former; instead of singing about what he lacks, Beger sings about what he has, and with just as much, if not more, joy. “I got my ass!” Yes you do, Berger! Go off king!!

1. Where do I Go - I was really debating whether to put “I got Life” or this first. But then I realized I spent almost two hours making a lyrical analysis of this song last night (stay tuned for that post >:)) and decided, yeah, this is probably my favorite. The instrumentation at the beginning is so… just… I don’t even have the words to describe it. Just know that movies about young people dying in wars they didn’t start hit me in a really personal way somehow. I’ll go into more detail in my analysis post.

I know my blog is mostly about Jesus Christ Superstar, which still ranks above this movie for me. However, I was completely entranced by the music of this film, and since seeing it I have felt the intense need to analyze its lyrics and musicality. If you like JCS and haven't seen this movie, I sincerely suggest checking it out.

[thewriterinthebatcave]

So, I read The Phantom Of Manthattan

In its entirety. @baepsyche had tried to dissuade me, she did her best, but I wanted to wade through the sewage that book is by myself and form my own opinion on it. I mean, I had a very clear image of how bad it would be when I heard @lindsayetumbls give the rundown in the Musicalsplaining episode of Love Never Dies, but I had no idea how bad it could actually be!

TL:DR The book is a mess that makes no sense as a sequel to whatever, nor it makes sense on its own because of how it’s structured and written. It sucks, it’s poorly written and isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on. Love Never Dies is a fucking masterpiece worth of all the awards for musical theater out there in comparison.

I mean... I’ve read bad books in my life. Once upon another time I handled a blog dedicated to poor literature - both printed and online - I’ve read my big fat share of bad literature, I binged on the Fifty Shades trilogy but Sweet Jesus Christ POM makes 50 Shades look like high art! 

Let’s start from the beginning, shall we?

1. Too many POV characters. There’s like... the Phantom, three different journalists two of which are there for one chapter alone and never return, there’s the priest, and a couple more I forgot. But... WHY? Why so many different POV characters in a book so short I literally finished it in a couple half hour long sessions? WHY? It makes no sense from a narration standpoint, it’s crowded and confusing and voyeuristic! Also, never including Christine’s POV you diminish her character to a paper thin token. Also, where’s Raoul?

2. Speaking of which, Raoul. Poor guy, the book shits on him from chapter 1 (the only barely readable chapter of the book), and by doing so right in the beginning the “big reveal” of Pierre/Gustave true parentage feels more of a “captain obvious” joke rather than a “I would have never guessed!”. Not that it is such a grand plot twist in Love Never Dies I mean, but Jesus, not like this! 

3. Yeah, speaking of that. People shit on Love Never Dies for “Beneath A Moonless Sky” and the sex scene that never was, but this is way worse! At least the song gives you a context, a moment you can at least imagine what the hell happened and maybe even why, but here? Nothing! They don’t even TALK about that, let alone explain to the reader that those two had sex! What the fuck! Pierre just happened to be born and Raoul never even questioned his parentage! Or maybe he does, he just doesn’t care since he fullfills the nobility’s expectations of a male heir, who knows. HE DOESN’T SAY ANYTHING RELEVANT IN THE WHOLE BOOK! No wonder in LND they turned him in the abusive alcoholic, they had no material to build on in this... thing. 

4. The Phantom and the backstory. I appreciate the fact that they tried to give him a past, and I really liked the fact that Forsythe took his time to even give at least a fraction of time/place context to the original book that hasn’t one by figuring out Leroux had a post-electricity Palais Garnier in mind, but the backstory for the Phantom... I’ve read more interesting fanfics. I haven’t read Kay’s Phantom, I have it but I haven’t started it yet so I can’t make comparisons, but seriously, I’ve really read fanfics retellings of Erik’s past more imaginative and fleshed out that this book.

Which leads me to...

5. Satanism? Really? Satanism? Of all the shock cards Forsythe could have dropped on the table, Satanism? Listen guys, I’m a metalhead, I listen to stuff that people have called “the music of the devil” (classic rock, blues and jazz included) for the past fifty years on daily basis, one of my favourite songs of all time is Emperor’s “Inno A Satana” which literally means “Hymn to Satan” in Italian. My parents were scared to death when I started dabbling in heavy metal because of the whole “satanism” thing, I know my shit about satanism (I actually have done my research), and let me tell you that shit is old. Like, dusty and moldy old, not just not fashionable, it’s such an old story no one finds it so shocking anymore. So... WHY? It makes no sense, drives no point in the story, it’s a damn McGuffin that isn’t even relevant anymore! It wasn’t at the time the book was published (the whole trial to Judas Priest, Black Sabbath and Ozzy Osbourne had happened like... 10 years prior the book was written so... meh) and I really hope it will never be again because... seriously... nope, it’s stupid and pointless, why on Earth it was used as a plot device I have no fuckin’ idea. 

6. Darius. Dude has no backstory, no descriptor except his greed and “devotion” to money and wealth. Oh and he smokes hashish. That’s it. We’ve got no other data on him. Jesus Christ, for the antagonist of the story he surely is kind of... bland? I mean, he’s non existent! Such a cop out, like really... WHY! At least Meg falling for the Phantom and getting all jealous crazy makes a teeny tiny bit of sense, but this guy? Bland, children’s book cutout satanism aside, which is a terrible choice of moving force for reasons above, the dude himself is so terribly fleshed out (ID, he isn’t) that his motivations are unclear at best and laughable at worst. You are the Phantom’s face in the world, he has so much money that if you start putting a side a grand here and a grand there he wouldn’t notice, you have power to make deals in his behalf, why don’t you just get the money and go? Have you learned nothing by working with the Phantom? Can’t you make your own money and become filthy rich yourself so you can honor your damn god  on your fucking own? Don’t you think your god would appreciate more you making your own wealth instead of pigging on the Phantom’s back and take only morsels of his own wealth? Fuck this book is a mess. 

7. Christine. I mean, she’s rarely there, for the time she is she’s either a hysterical mess or a an angel on stage, and she is supposed to be the reason everything happens. In reality, it looks like everything happens in spite of her. She has no power on her own, she’s like a piece of wood floating in the sea during a storm. 

8... No, I’m not going further with this. I could shit on this book for the whole day, but I have other things to do, better things to do. 

I’m going to wash my eyes with bleach now. 

[feastwaiter6-blog]

Regularly Requested Queries About Cannabis Utilization in Colorado

1st and foremost, the simple rules of legalized recreational marijuana drug use are: • Coloradoans may only have or obtain one ounce of marijuana at a time. • Smoking cigarettes, vaporizing, or consuming hashish in public places (I.e., Crimson Rocks Coors Subject sixteenth Street Shopping mall parking heaps or airports) is absolutely forbidden. • Driving below the affect of marijuana is illegal. So, all Coloradoans can use marijuana for satisfaction now? Appropriate--to an extent. All lawful people of Colorado 21 years and older could have, use, exhibit, acquire, or transport 1 ounce (virtually sixty joints) or considerably less of cannabis for recreational use. However, several towns and counties have handed their possess amendments to make things this kind of as marijuana expanding services or retail pot retailers unlawful (this is hunting at you, Colorado Springs, Westminster, and Centennial!). Similarly, your employer has the correct to create his or her own policies concerning marijuana use amongst staff-even in the privateness of their personal residences. Since marijuana is legal in Colorado, petty drug offenses aren't that huge a offer anymore, appropriate? This is a widespread misunderstanding. The federal authorities nevertheless considers marijuana unlawful, which means any proof that you have partaken in or obtained the drug could impact your federal pupil financial loans, specific work positions, and social positive aspects this kind of as meals stamps or public housing. Moreover, drug offenses will usually present up on your history checks. I'm 21 years old could I share my weed with my eighteen-calendar year-previous brother? No way. You are not able to provide marijuana to any person younger than 21-even if it truly is free and not for monetary compensation. Also, the zero-tolerance legislation means people underneath 21 confront an computerized reduction of their license if they are found driving underneath the impact of cannabis. Can I resell the weed I acquired legally? No. You could, nevertheless, present someone over 21 up to 1 ounce of marijuana-as long as there is certainly no trade of income associated. If my university roommate visits me from Alabama, do all these regulations use to him as effectively? Only if he has a authorities-issued Colorado ID. Non-inhabitants might obtain up to ¼ an ounce of cannabis for each transaction, whilst they might have 1 full ounce at a time. Essentially, your pal could make 4 different purchases in one working day, but that is a gray problem in which the consequences, or deficiency thereof, just aren't express so considerably. Is there a legal restrict for how significantly weed I can have in my program and still generate? The legal restrict is 5 nanograms or less of delta nine-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC, the active component in cannabis) for every milliliter in whole blood. This just isn't a great measurement simply because distinct strains of cannabis have distinct potencies of THC also, people metabolize the drug at much a lot more assorted charges than alcoholic beverages. For this purpose, you'll most likely in no way see a chart that tells you how a lot of joints or brownies are also many to get guiding the wheel. How is the quantity of cannabis in my physique analyzed? If they have a justifiable explanation, legislation enforcement officials suspicious of drugged driving will ask for a blood attract. As this Westword article points out, however, these blood tests have not however been refined and they can be rather inaccurate. In this circumstance, the reporter's blood take a look at confirmed that he was greatly stoned several hours right after he experienced very last smoked something. Other experts feel men and women develop up a tolerance to the drug and they may well even now be sober at five nanograms. I urge you to hugely think about refusing the blood test if the scenario arises. If you do consider the check, make certain you protected one of the blood samples to reaffirm the outcomes independently later on on. You suggest I won't have to pee in a cup? A urine examination has no value when it comes to cannabis simply because traces of the drug might display up in your system long soon after you are sober. A blood examination is the only exact indicator of active THC at the second. How long do the authorities have to perform the blood check? With liquor, they should demonstrate a person's BAC (blood alcohol content) is .08 per cent or more in two hours of driving. They haven't issued a outlined time period of time for drug screening but but, relaxation assured, it will be some thing "affordable." Will I drop my license if I refuse the blood take a look at? Potentially. As with DUIs, you could shed your license for a calendar year if you refuse the blood take a look at. As opposed to drunk driving however, there won't be any administrative penalties on your report this is important due to the fact cannabis consumption proceeds to be banned at the federal stage. Remember, nevertheless, that you can always politely decrease to do the standardized area sobriety assessments (going for walks in a straight line, reciting the alphabet backwards, and so forth.) without having penalty. Why need to I refuse to just take a standardized subject sobriety check? In limited, there are special assessments developed for evaluating drug intoxication and not each law enforcement officer is qualified in those very yet. Legislation enforcement officials uneducated in marijuana recognition definitely is not going to support your situation as they don't have the assets to make an precise judgment of your sobriety. Wait around, so will I be arrested if I have any traces of cannabis in my body? No, the mere presence of hashish in your blood is not a adequate explanation to arrest you. Moreover, having 5 nanograms or much more of marijuana in your program is not enough to immediately convict you of a DUID both if you had a BAC of .08 percent or a lot more, on the other hand, you would routinely be charged with drunk driving. Everyone's declaring cannabis is safer than alcoholic beverages what is actually the danger in driving stoned? Yocan Evove plus show cannabis consumption influences spatial perceptions, which means drugged drivers have slower response moments and are inclined to swerve or tailgate other autos far more typically. Believe about individuals vintage stoner movie scenes in which the dudes are absolutely fascinated by the measurement of their fingers would you want them driving you down I-twenty five? I'm a healthcare-marijuana consumer does this make me an effortless concentrate on for DUID checks? It shouldn't. In accordance to a Colorado bill, a person's health-related-cannabis standing (I.e., a legitimate healthcare-marijuana registry ID) are not able to be utilised as evidence of impairment or probable cause for a blood test. Can I at minimum generate around with marijuana products? As with alcohol, it is unlawful to drive with an open container of cannabis performing so will end result in a targeted traffic infraction that shows up on federal checks (as I discussed before). The legislation applies to everything containing marijuana that is open up or has a broken seal, or has partly-taken out contents. The best suggestions I can offer you at this position is to keep it as much out of attain as possible. In reality, Place IT IN THE TRUNK. My automobile will not have a trunk. Alright, as with all guidelines, there are particular exceptions. If you drive an SUV or minivan, you might hold unsealed marijuana powering the previous row of upright seats. Open up cannabis is also authorized in the living quarters of trailers or motor residences. Can I smoke/eat weed in the automobile if I'm not the driver? No. Individuals in the passenger spot of a car can not use or eat marijuana, and the no open up- container legislation applies to them as effectively. While we're at it, you also can not smoke cannabis in a taxi or on general public transportation. You could, however, smoke cannabis if you are in the rear of a privately-employed automobile. As prolonged as I purchase the pot legally in Colorado, can I get it to other states? Absolutely not--not even to Washington. To start with, bear in head the TSA is a federal establishment and that cannabis is banned at all airports, including DIA. You can't fly with the drug, and in fact, you are not able to even depart cannabis in your vehicle at the airport that would rely as unlawful possession and subject matter you to a large wonderful. Next, our neighboring states are cracking down on people driving into their borders with weed bought in Colorado. Wyoming, for illustration, is not going to even recognize a Colorado-issued health-related-cannabis card and will make arrests for illegal possession appropriately.

[iluvtv]

“I Sleep in a Bed but I’m Homeless” and other contradictions in terms

Last month Donald Glover curated a media moment. He hosted Saturday Night Live while his alter ego Childish Gambino simultaneously appeared as the musical guest. All the while (to much social media fanfare) he dropped a music video chock full of divisive commentary on racism in America. In my opinion this wonderfully creative and crucial social commentary rattled the masses far more than I think they should have. I'm startled by the possibility that one could "be here now” and still be surprised that This is America.

Point being though, that during a spring weekend’s naughtiest hours in 2018 Glover did what he did best — worked. And in doing so his art (as it is wont to do) challenged us. In just a little over and hour this legendary genius gave us everything he has to offer. He made us laugh, taught us something and kept up his now signature cocky air. Reaffirming that while he will provide his brilliance for us to share and learn from it is not exactly for us.

In an incredible New Yorker interview by the fabulous Tad Friend earlier this year Glover explains; “If ‘Atlanta’ was made just for black people, it would be a very different show. But I can’t even begin to tell you how, because blackness is always seen through a lens of whiteness—the lens of what white people can profit from at that moment. That hasn’t changed through slavery and Jim Crow and civil-rights marches and housing laws and ‘We’ll shoot you.’ Whiteness is equally liquid, but you get to decide your narrative.” For the moment, he suggested, white America likes seeing itself through a black lens. “Right now, black is up, and so white America is looking to us to know what’s funny.”

But before we go that deep, early in that SNL episode there was his monologue. Through this caricature of himself Glover pokes fun at the man he presents in this interview. By claiming there is  "nothing he can't do" while failing at everything, subsequently puking into a clarinet and repeatedly bringing up his rejection from SNL  many careers ago, he delivers audiences a humbler version of himself. This is notable because even if the farce is egotistical what he's actually playing is failure. Was this by a cast writer's design to mock his arrogance or did he write every word himself?

Neither would surprise me. After greedily consuming Atlanta’s first season (Hulu why must you wait so long to give me new FX seasons?) and then studying the media image Glover presents I see he is his own anomaly.

Confident, worried, scared, brave, untouchable and sensitive. Through his thoughtful creativity he has (for the most part) been given permission to be whomever he wants.

We all will agreeably, eagerly (and even gluttonously) accept all of it.

He didn’t always believe this would be possible. When he first pitched Atlanta he was certain this wouldn’t be the case at all but FX surprised him. In the New Yorker interview the producers explain:

“The parts that you’re worried we’re going to think are too weird—lean into those.”

From its onset I suppose Atlanta can be read as sad. A sort of devastating drama on race and poverty and violence. And while this is clearly a trap story there is  an almost inexplicable, deep seeded sense of satire that feels both simultaneously impossible to pinpoint or ignore.

In imagery and experiences (which more often than not trend more towards metaphors than reality) Atlanta challenges me. I just can’t get enough but I also can't help but feel like most of the time I don't totally get it. And this is just the tip of the iceberg in the long series of anomalies which like Glover himself comprise Atlanta. At the end of the day am I just too white, slightly too old (and more to the point un -hip) or was this confusion just the purpose?

FX Chief John Landgraf explains to the New Yorker, “Donald and his collaborators are making an existential comedy about the African-American experience, and they are not translating it for white audiences.”

There is a consistent underlying dichotomy in all of Atlanta's odd stories and part of it I suppose is an assumed understanding between the white coastal viewer and Glover that we are only partially in on the joke.

Presenting this dichotomy, Atlanta begins introducing Earn (Glover) and Van’s (Zazzie Beetz) relationship which while terribly charming is equal parts fleeting.  Seconds into a relaxed and loving scenes their relationship just as quickly turns contentious.

We watch this pattern repeat again and again.

The pilot episode continues in this vein introducing relationship dynamics before revealing a storyline or history.

We meet Earn’s fed up parents. Friendly enough but annoyed that their adult son is always asking for money, oh and also that he doesn't flush.

Earn: "That wasn't me."

Mom: "That was you. I checked. You better start eating some real food and not all these candies and cookies..."

We are introduced to my favorite character, Darius (Lakeith Stanfield) wearing only an apron while baking cookies. He also has guns and a butcher knife.

We witness the first of many racial power dynamics as Earn takes his cousin Alfred’s (Brian Tyree Henry) tape to a white DJ “buddy”, hoping if he can get Al’s alter ego Paperboi radio time he'll be able to convince his cousin to give him work representing Paperboi. It is here we see some dumb white kid front as though he is "hard" using language he would never use in front of any black man he found intimidating. Because Earn is not intimidating. In the face of this obnoxious DJ Earn is unassuming, friendly and essentially desperate all the while ignoring the terrible behavior of a stereotypical white millennial’s crude attempt to impress his "nigga" while completely refusing to throw Earn a bone by spinning Paperboi's first single. It is noteworthy throughout this season just how child like un-intimidting the character Glover has created for himself is. 

Later when Earn manipulates things in his own favor he asks an older black janitor if this rude white DJ has ever said "nigga" in front of him.

The janitor is stunned by the very thought!

But this is who Earn is. Friend describes it as such: “Atlanta” broke rules that most viewers hadn’t quite realized were rules. In comedies, jokes are underlined by closeups, but Atlanta’s camera stayed aloof, serving not as an exclamation point but as a neutral bystander. The characters didn’t have histrionic reactions to the problem of the week; they just gave up a little more. Earn was an antihero, as is now customary, but, unlike Don Draper or Walter White or Olivia Pope, he wasn’t an expert in anything. He wasn’t a great manager or a great part-time boyfriend or, for that matter, a particularly promising human being. Curiously boyish in shorts and a backpack, he wasn’t even active, the minimal standard for television characters. He didn’t seem to do or want anything. He just watched and flinched and got yelled at to grow up.”

The episode ends with the show's first of many very obvious forays into existential surrealism. The way Atlanta plays with fantasy is very fresh and new and brave and often completely impossible to fully comprehend forcing me to wonder why I only took a handful of philosophy courses in college?

But aren’t those courses just an antidote of the privileged white youth’s confusion?

That and marijuaina.

Again, Friend  addresses this discussing Glover's complete willingness to fail where other black television revolutionaries are wary.

“This sensibility is singular yet recognizable. Just as John Cheever’s epiphanies and apologias were stamped by drink and Paul Bowles’s hallucinatory quietude by hashish, so “Atlanta” ’s vibe is molded by weed. There’s a goofiness to the action, a dreamy awareness that reality is untrustworthy right now, but hold up, try this edible. Recognizing that quality, Lakeith Stanfield told me, “I decided to play Darius as a high version of myself. And now he’s become all the fantastical elements of Atlanta condensed into one person—this gateway to Freakville.”

Half way through the pilot we find Earn on a bus with his sleeping daughter opening up to a well dressed black man in a suit about feeling like a loser. "Am I just there to make things easier for winners?”  he asks.

The man sits listening patiently on this bus seat, all the while making a Nutella sandwich. "Just a symptom of the way things are," he explains to Earn "actual victor belongs to those who simply do not seek failure."

He forces a bite of his chocolate bus sandwich on Earn and then just as quickly disappears, only the tub of Nutella remains.

And abruptly the episode closes where it began, realizing the reason why the first scene was so confusing is only because it was actually the end. None of these characters were lying or being intentionally evasive, rather the drama which opened Atlanta had not yet ensued. And while it is still rather unclear, on some level even the whitest and most sheltered kids (those who can comfortably say the N word around very specific audiences) understand this rhetoric just enough and those who grew up in the trap world of Atlanta could probably write their philosophy dissertations on the scene.

As an audience we continue to ride out their drama into episode two. Conveniently, the coinciding moments of Alfred's arrest and his radio debut have vaulted him to instant fame all while housed in the relatively newsless space of jail.

When Darius comes to bail him out even the cops ask if they can pose for selfies with Paperboi. A beautiful moment of social commentary on race, class and most importantly fame.

Meanwhile, not-famous and mostly useless Earn stays stuck in jail which lends itself to one of the saddest satirical series of scenes I have ever seen. Think  Orange Is The New Black but really, really funny or maybe really, really miserable and also just so exactly where any of us (even the more privileged white girls) might end up for a few hours after a really, really bad night.

Fortunately I never have but I will take Atlanta at it's (sur)real(ist) word.

When Earn is told by the guard he cannot sleep he is baffled.

“Everyone sleeps."

To which he is told, "If you wanted to sleep you should have thought about that before you came to jail."

This dysfunction is further magnified by the token insane guy who apparently gets locked up on a near weekly basis. While his absolutely pathological behavior at first prompts laughs from the rest of the men waiting in lock-down they also  all just sit there and quietly watch as the guards kick his ass and drag him off to solitary.

To the repeat offenders this is normal behavior.

Earn, like myself seems less comfortable with this violence.

Meanwhile, Alfred due to newfound Paperboi fame is suffering his own violent satire.

On a walk through his projects he sees a kid with a toy gun shooting at his friends. They are playing a game of pretend in which the male child is Paperboi.

Alferd observes this. The kid, through clear admiration of his alter ego pretends to shoot down his little girlfriend. She feigns death just as the children's mother comes out to yell at the children, asserting to these small black bodies that they should "just say no to guns"

Overwhelmed, and clearly experiencing a myriad of emotions from the last 24 hours Al approaches the family and argues to the children that "shooting people ain't cool." At first the mother is stand-offish and annoyed at his presence but once he admits he is the very same rapper whom they are make-believing about the mood shifts. Instantaneous hilarity ensues as she is suddenly very interested in this infamous man. Momma comes on hard posing Al with the family for photographs. She is genuine comic relief "now one with my head on yo chest," she says as she snuggles in. And even Al who was out for a walk to escape the fresh madness his single has suddenly created seems calmed -- his comfort level with being viewed as violent has shifted now that it is getting him some pussy.

Likewise, the mother is now completely comfortable with the children playing “guns”, clearly sending the message that fame and more specifically hip-hop fame excuses violence.

This hypocrisy so clearly mirrors that of the prison guards from earlier and sadly represents America’s reality. If everyone from the single Mothers in the ghetto to the police are down with rappers using guns it must be OK, right? And folks were even remotely shocked by Gambino’s music video which debuted nearly two years later?!

The episode closes when Van finally bails Earn out of jail. It is unsurprising really that it is left on the woman to pull through and protect the men. I find that this aspect of American reality is more often acknowledged in African American and other ethnic popular culture than in white. This is too bad really, as it is a remarkable reality which women are tremendously under-appreciated for. I too have bailed a boyfriend out of jail. I watched him walk out of the police station arms in the air, proud of his day.  He also never came with me to Salinas to collect the title of my car which I lost to the county in the bail process (its a complicated when you are only 21 and haven't owned anything or held a job for longer than 2 years).

Appropriately, the credits run to Bill Withers' "Grandma's Hands," subtly noting the importance of the matriarch through a beautiful song. This also solidifies Atlanta's role as one of the best television soundtracks I (the generally music ignoramous) have ever bothered to notice.

As the audience grows more comfortable with the odd (yet perfect) stylings of Atlanta we venture into episode three armed and ready to address poverty as it pertains to immaturity. In real life Donald Glover and I are the same age but somehow he plays Earn much younger. Pop Culture Happy Hour Pod Cast discussed this episode at length, pointing out that the pathetic date Earn organizes to impress Van is actually just a very young man's attempt at romance. They argue that this scene would likely play out quite differently for the couple ten years later. Then again, Glover himself might come back at this  this theory; pointing out the story he is trying to represent here is "the trap" and the assumption that the only thing which keeps Earn so completely suffocated by an up-selling, self-serving waiter is time is just a white, educated NPR audience being only marginally clear on the concept. I can see both sides to this particular coin while (as a white, educated NPR listener) also continuing to ascertain that Earn's overall behavior reminds me more of my 20 year old sister’s than my clique of 30-somethings (whom I consider millennials only due to some made-up falsehood of a technicality -- we are very clearly The Oregon Trail Generation).

Anyhow, this frozen-in-time youthfulness (as a means to escape poverty while actually perpetuating it) is already well established in our protagonist and immediately reinforced as the episode itself opens with him ordering a kid's meal at a fast food joint. No dice:

“I Didn’t get title of daytime manager by passing out discounts," the proud black girl behind the counter explains.

He begs for a water cup instead and settles on stealing diet coke from the fountain -- eyeing the hispanic janitor with a daring glance. He walks away in his short shorts in the rain and backpack, emphasizing either his pathetic-ness-- or just child-ness.

And as I so often did 14 years ago in the middle of the day he heads to Alfred's where they smoke blunts and play video games.

OK I didn’t play video games but my productivity level was essentially on par.

And somehow while reliving our own boring youths through this mundane existence of an ordinary day audiences are still terribly entertained.

Darius, our scene stealing, wonderful guru of a roommate irons in his bathrobe, pulling a gun out of a cereal box. "Just so you guy's know there's probably a bullet in here somewhere, “ he warns.

 A drug selling story arc evolves between Alfred and Darius which in a more mature moment Earn is wary of due in large part to his cousin’s new-found notoriety (but how else are they supposed to make money?)  however, because I am a white girl and the drug story in this episode just gets so fucking dark and also I can only bombard you with so much information I will instead focus in on the terrible date which Earn attempts in hopes to assuage Van's whining about his irresponsible behavior.

No dice

She's wary from the get. Even tries to refuse his invite at first but he begs:

“Can I at least buy you dinner and watch from the other side of the room? I can even get one of those corny ass dudes you like to eat it with you.”

He continues, mocking the guys she likes by mimicking her (always a good strategy when you’re trying to prove you are the preferred choice): “‘I love your energy. Your dreads are in a bun’ “

The two accuse each other of being their own worst black stereotypes.

“I’m in a bed but I’m technically homeless and love it,” she mocks back.

They giggle. Something about their terribly unromantic connection is just so terribly romantic. Or maybe I just really, really like when guys make fun of me?

There's a brief scene involving the gun between Darius and Alfred where Darius solidifies himself as my favorite character, absolutely proving unequivocally that the most simple men are also the wisest. He explains to Alfred that his “assumed perversion of the word daddy stems from his own fear of mortality.” sheer and idiotic genius. An utterly true and hilarious savant.

Meanwhile, the date Earn has finagled is not going according to plan. WIth only $63 in his bank account and promises of a decent happy-hour dashed he is just in a hipster restaurant in a bad neighborhood, springing for a valet, with a date who is luxuriously lapping us each and every ploy from their server to raise their check.

When Earn, trying to lower their overall bill in spite of Van's pricey picks asks for a "Miller High Life in a can," the waitress responds,"ooo we've got a hipster!"

Yes, us educated, white NPR listeners sure as fuck did try to appropriate poverty through the hipster movement, didn’t we?

You can get a $17 trotter hot dog at the bar around the way from my house.

Likewise, Darius and Alfred's drug deal has also gone all wrong. They have been led to the middle of nowhere only to find a gang of black men with chains, drinking Hennessy and hanging out in front of a luxury camper van chilling around a campfire. Here the woods are a stark juxtaposition from their familiar life in the projects and yet the forrest is surprisingly more menacing. Nothing safe about unfamiliarity -- particularly when guns are in the mix. However, even with a tied up guy crying in the corner there is this unshakable element of satire, ever present yet so difficult to explain or maybe even understand. An impending doom of hilarity is the omnipresent mark of all Atlanta scenes.

But just as the episode grows darker and all of our protagonists’ immaturity increasingly complicates their situations the resourcefulness these young men have learned growing up without means also manages to save them.

At the end of the day nobody wins -- and the best laugh is when the homeless guy working as the restaurant’s (off market) valet runs into the fancy restaurant to warn a random white man in an expensive suit that his car is being towed prompting the two polar-opposite gentlemen to race outside in excited collusion.  This sudden impromptu camaraderie is just a downright hilarious aside.

But in a true test to it’s sitcom roots, Atlanta holds to the rule that come episode four nothing much is really permissible to change so in spite of tremendous havoc nobody really loses. At the end of the day Earn solves the problem of the expensive date by reporting his debit card stolen and Darius and Alfred don't die.

Maybe even the homeless valet got a tip.

In both a sitcom’s writers room and in the trap, everybody's just trying to survive.

The following episode The Streisand Effect continues this exploration of survival. We peer through the lens into  fame and notoriety wondering if success built through any means necessary, driven by the sheer desire to survive can ever really be deemed ethical.

Oddly, the querry reminds me of one tackled by a completely socially unconscious show — the Friend’s episode where Phoebe and Joey argue the existence of  truly selfless good deeds in The one where Phoebe hates PBS.

The Streisand Effect centers a similar debate through a racially ambiguous asshole internet "celebrity" (aka troll) who causes an all out twitter feud (which Alfred brings to real life).  Meanwhile  an interesting story line between Darius and Earn play out as the two explore what one’s existence means when you are truly just surviving pay check to pay check.

There are other episodes I love more and will focus more energy into analyzing but here are a few of the very best, most stand-out lines:

Old bartender: "Guy was Smoking a swisher with no weed. He gave me the creeps."

Darius: "Chinese people short because of Genghis Kahn, look it up!"              Earn: "In what? The racism book?"

The aforementioned troll (Zan) to Alfred (who is accusing his internet game of being pretty fucked up): "All a gang, we all just hustling"

Alfred: "I have to rap, I'm making the most of a bad situation."                          Zan: "You’re exploiting your situation. All of us are exploiting to make money"(hilarious scene ensues with Zan filming a paid child to spout filthy rhymes and deliver pizzas).

And if you are interested, this moment is discussed in greater depth on Fresh Air where, Brian Tyree Henry explains what this trap means to him.

We close with Earn teaching Darius that poor people don't have time for investments they need to eat today. This is a poignant moment where their friendship is solidified, poverty is explored and human nature vs. exploitation is left undecided.

Personally, I tend to agree with both Alfred and Zan’s views of exploitation though admittedly Alfred’s actions are certainly carried with far more integrity.

If you are particularly dense but have made it all the way to episode five, Nobody Beats the Biebs, you will no longer be able to ignore the absurdist tactics this show is employing to fuck with our perceptions of race, appropriation, stereotypes and popular music culture. 

The episode takes place mainly within a high school gym at a celebrity basketball fundraiser for Atlanta’s Youth. Paperboi has been invited to participate in the charity game and Earn of course attends as “representation”. Noticing a gorgeous successful news anchor there to cover the event, Alfred ditches Earn and sets off to pursue a date (or at the very least an on-air interview). She immediately staves off both advances, letting him know that she knows him as “the guy who shot someone.” He insists that isn't really who he is and invites her to get to know the real him, "I'll let you interview me someplace real fly like Bennihana," he offers to which she retorts that she and her fan base aren't into the “gangster thing”, and blows him off fairly easily as the commotion of "Justin Bieber's" arrival has distracted the masses.

At first I assumed that Justin Bieber was one of the white guys in this entourage but as a feud ensues between Alfred and JB you realize that in the fantastical world Glover has created Bieber is in fact just black. Or at least appears that way to us. After watching the whole episode I can't definitively pinpoint why Glover created this racial fluidity. Was it a point about racial appropriation, common perceptions and stereotypes? Or was he just trying to fuck with his audiences? I can only assume that most of Glover’s surrealist style is designed to achieve all of the above (and more). Anyway, this Bieber who may be just as black in appearance as Paperboi, is definitely not just one in the same. Other than his outward appearance the Bieber Fever is the same douchey, successful, unapologetic and handsome man I assume him to be in real life (admittedly I know zero about Justin). In Glover’s world though he can pee on the floor in front of everyone and the general opinion of him is not even slightly affected. He is the Golden Boy pervious to social optics and to him (much like to the pretty newsgirl) Paperboi is "a nigga who blew  other niggas brains out…” although he adds the operative “cool!" to the end of this statement. As the episode develops Alfred's hatred towards this pop sensation grows and they wage war on the court. Afterward Bieber offers  a press conference full of "sincere" apologies for the fight. All really just a marketing ploy for his new song called "Justice," (a title with more irony than I care to unpack here).

Meanwhile, Earn and Darius are also confronted by stereotypes and racial profiling. 

Earn encounters a successful music agent who mistakes him for a different black man whom she believes destroyed her career. In an attempt to seek revenge on this man she at first is very kind. She invites Earn into an elite circle of producers it is all very posh and excellent for networking and Earn laps it up, happy to play along with her confusion as long as this woman’s racism serves his needs. The rewards are seemingly high enough that Earn can turn a blind eye, joining a very specific brand of self loathing by embracing  the fact that he is participating in one of the most frustrating and oldest stereotypes out there: "all you people look the same.” It isn't until she accuses him of undercutting her and pledges to ruin him that he tells her he is not in fact Alonzo to which she retorts. "I'm going to make sure you die homeless." He certainly seems to be on this path.

Darius' day is equally bizarre and yet also totally conceivable. His storyline is so unique I can't help but marvel over where the inspiration came from. It seems safe to assume it must be rooted in someone’s real life experience. Perhaps a news story that was mostly overlooked? I digress, he paints a dog (which it seems worth noting that in addition to being quite the homemaker Darius is  a talented artist and his room is full of these supplies). Darius rolls up his painting and goes to the shooting range where he uses his art for target practice. Harmless enough, right? Not quite, a collective panic ensues. A white man calls Darius “psycho for shooting a dog” and tells him he has to leave, to which Darius explains that “a human target is just as specific as shooting a dog.” Which just seems pretty accurate to me. A Mexican guy joins in the bickering, he points out to the white guy that he shoots at Mexican targets. Stating more truth spurs further anger and an uprising is vowed. Darius tries to explain that dogs in his ‘hood are “fucked up (not cuddly pets)” but the range’s manager interrupts the men’s arguing with a shot gun,

“I told you rules before you got here ain’t gunna let you start no shit” he leads out a very patient Darius.

This scene is so fucked up.  Its rhetoric on arbitrary rules and categories is so important while remaining on brand with the show’s satirical edge. It magnifies the fact that the laws of a black man with a gun are so, so different than that of a white man with a gun takes a very different and slightly less sinister spin on the all too familiar police shooting unarmed black men storyline. We also get a close look at how Darius is observed and judged. A recurring theme of Atlanta is the simultaneous invisibility and hyper-visibility of the impoverished and minorities.

The episode ends with Black Bieber's aforementioned ”sincere" apology, explaining he's been trying to be too cool lately which has lead to hanging with the wrong crowd. He offers his new-found commitment to christ and uses autotune to premier his new song, Justice. In the back of the crowd, frustrated and over it Alfred returns to his day’s start and gives picking up the anchor another go. She returns with the lesson we’ve witnessed all of our protagonists scrambling to learn for the past 30 minutes” “let me give you some advice, play your part. People don’t want Justin to be asshole they want you to be asshole. You’re the rapper. That’s your job”

So, in sum this episode features….

Black man kicked out of shooting range

Black man mistaken for other black man

Black rapper unable to escape media’s perceptions of murderer in spite of being recognized as an “Atlanta Celebrity”.

All the while a rich white musician is able to chameleon himself into an infallible black superstar for a bit of extra street cred.

There is a lot to dissect here, but I’ll let an ethnic studies course can take it from here...

Episode 6, aptly titled Value is the first one to really feature Van's story and give women a voice. I was immediately interested to see if a woman took the reigns in the writer's room on this one because even the tone is so different.It didn’t take much digging to find this from Joshua Alston over at the A.V. Club. 

“Glover started off strong before a single frame was shot by bringing in staff writer Stefani Robinson to assist on the script, the first to give a writing credit to someone whose last name isn’t Glover. It seems like a little thing, but it makes such a huge difference to know that someone with insights about how black women communicate contributed to an episode that mostly consists of black women communicating and miscommunicating.”

It feels easy to  proclaim that the tone employed in Value lacks the humorist sensibilities applied to other episodes but I have to wonder if that’s an oversimplification. Perhaps I just found Van's story so horribly relatable (she seems to have the same dumb (re:bad) luck as myself and the series of unfortunate events which befall her here may just feel less satirical when you’ve felt the hardships yourself? Maybe a black man from the trap in Atlanta wouldn't find other episodes this season as funny as I did? Maybe I'm being sensitive? (Though that doesn't really sound like me to be honest). Or, maybe while very, very good this episode just wasn't meant to punch the gut in the same manner a jokey man-centric 30 minutes does. Maybe Glover isn’t ready to tackle female satire. I'm not sure and it seems like all these assumptions could get me in trouble so in the interest of not putting my foot in my mouth (or pulling a Van) I’ll move on....

This episode centers around the drama which ensues when Van's old friend comes into town. Actually, in this case (as is often true with childhood girlfriends) frenemy is a better term. This gal-pal plays companion to NBA players which subsequently allows her to lead a very posh lifestyle. She is baffled by Van's far more humble life and makes her judgements very clear by stating straight off the bat the following three rather insensitive points:

“Sometimes I wish I had a kid and then I'm like ew, no." (preach sista!)

“Back in the day you would have made fun of yourself for still fucking with Earn.”

and 

“Black women have to be valuable. NBA players fuck with me because I provide a service. I am worth it. I am cultured, intelligent...."

the implications here are thick and seem to cut very deep.

Anyway, as a passive aggressive fight inevitably ensues Van's girl does eventually bribe her back into frenemy territory, insisting they make up over a joint. They hotbox the bitch’s fancy-ass car and at first seem to be reliving the good old days but as is apt to happen when you hang out with narcissists (particularly in our social media obsessed times) eventually Van finds herself being forced into snapping pic after pic of her social-climbing friend who is dead set on getting that absolute perfect insta-shot. I have zero patience for this behavior. Actually, every girl who has ever made the mistake of forcing me into this game has quickly fallen out of my good graces.

Ultimately, the mess that ensues for Van because she casually decided to hit a joint a few times with her disaster of an old friend is totally comparable to multiple series of my own disasters. Fortunately for both myself and Van (we’re similarly industrious and independent young women) we do manage to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps and move on. But, for a minute suspend your disbelief that I too could create this sort of disaster and let's discuss Van's mess:

She awakens the next morning to a cell phone reminder that today is “drug test day.” This of course prompts an insane rampage as she attempts to figure out where to get “clean urine.” When both Old Friend and Alfred fail her she realizes she has a whole garbage pail full of her baby's diapers. A true renaissance woman Van creates a complicated process to extract the pee and tapes a condom full of her daughter's urine to her own thigh. In a flowy dress she heads off to school (making it clear for the first time that she is an educator of some sort).

The storyline then takes a quick veer from the very normal baby-pee-condom situation prompted by a basketball “prostitute” to a  fellow teacher who approaches Van. This woman is beyond frustrated with one of her student’s. A  brief aside ensues regarding a black child who has come to school in white face to fuck with his teacher (who is so mad she begs Van to help her deal with him so she "doesn't get arrested for beating his ass,”). It is a sharp return to the previous episode’s discussion of cultural appropriation, reminding viewers how inescapable race wars are for Glover.

Van declines to help her friend, she is on a mission after all. But of course, things don’t quite go as planned. A bit of physical comic relief ensues when she can't untie the condom of pee. She tries to rip things apart with her teeth which of course results in pee spraying everywhere (except of course in the cup for urine sample).

Desperate Van just admits to the principal that she smoked weed.

This is definitely something I would do.

When you’re honest no-one can fault you, right?!

Wrong.

Dissapointed, the principal explains that the county can’t afford quarterly drug tests anyway so after the initial one required for hire the samples aren’t actually sent anywhere.

Of course.

She levels with Van, “everyone smokes weed. The system isn’t made for these kids to succeed and you gotta shake it off somehow. I get it. But unfortunately you’ve admitted your drug use to a government employee and now I have to fire you. To cover my own ass as well as the schools’”

She gives Van a hug and one weeks notice.

Defeated Van, an inexperienced druggie tries to get more weed from Alfred who tells her she's “sloppy as fuck.” Which after the day she has had is just truth.

The episode closes with the same kid still in white face smirking now in Van’s class.

Again, somehow the female battle of race and class explored in this episode feels more sad to me than the male saga we’ve seen play out thus far

The closing shot of the sinister child in white face and my own history is undoubtedly playing into my interpretation. I will admit here that I have two equally stupid stories of being fired for absolutely absurd things that make zero sense. Once for rolling a blunt by request for my boss. A swisher of marijuiana which I didn't smoke and only procured because he asked.  Another time a 28 year old woman claimed I was sexually harassing her. In neither case was I truly guilty and yet somehow believed that an overcompensated apology could fix things with the higher-ups. At the end of the day though everyone is just interested in covering their own asses. Again, this probably could be presented far more satirically and at times I am able to give these stories a bitingly funny spin — but not with the regularity one might assume.I suppose what I’m getting at is I know what it's like to essentially be so inexperienced with getting in trouble that you can't tell when to just shut your goddamn mouth. I also think that this assumed guilt is such a female burden. It is a subsequent and frequently overlooked side effect of the ancient historical annals of sexism. Perhaps if we can learn anything from “mansplaining” it is to always just take the position that everyone else just doesn’t get it. But then also just keep our mouths shut.

Episode 7, B.A.N has got to be the most hilarious, perfect, wonderful episode of Glover's premier season (and pretty much of all television of all time). I feel fairly confident saying its everyone's favorite. B.A.N which stands for Black American Network is (simply put) a fictional television episode called Montague; a black spin on a Donahue-esque late night “news” show featuring Alfred as one of it’s guests. The "fake news" premise on this show delves into the complexities of identity in our touchy PC culture and is in its own right more than enough to ensure side gripping hilarity. However, it is the commercials interspersed throughout this episode that really cinch the deal.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

The subject of the Montague episode, “how accepted sexuality is affecting black American Youth and Culture” features a panel made up exclusively of Paperboi and the head of “Trans Issues.”  Ummmm..... really? I’m already laughing

Alfred is being called out by Montague and asked to explain a comment he made on twitter, quoted by our host as such: “y’all N words said I was weird for not wanting to F word Kaitlyn Jenner."

He is asked if this makes him transphobic? Alfred is complacent, admitting that while he gets what they're saying she (Jenner) just isn't "important to me".

The white trans expert explains Paperboi is coming from a culture of exclusion and power; the black community has issues with power and masculinity more than transphobia. She calls him out on the layer of fluidity in his raps to which he uses the same line he used in response to the challenges posed earlier by the racially ambiguous internet celebrity, Van: "I'm just trying to get paid." The ultimate premise of this show is, after all, escaping the trap life.

Cut to commercial break.

And here is the gold:

Commercial 1: Black guy in a bodega being up-charged for a can of Arizona Iced Tea. The tagline: Arizona: price is on the can.

Commercial 2: A masquerade party filled with fancy black people drinking Mickey's forty ounce bottles out of champagne flutes. Tagline? Mickey’s: You're drinking it wrong.

Yes! This appeals to all my senses. I remember when I was 19 and 40 ounces, Conan O’brien, Swisher Sweets, 7-11 sandwiches and a bit of homework were evening staples.

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming:

A Montague correspondent is reporting on scene regarding a “trans-racial” black teenager (I kid you not) who self-identifies as, yes, a 35 year old white man. Ummm..... I hope you’re laughing now too.

As a black teenage boy he had always wondered why he wasn't getting the respect he deserved, "then it hit me,” he tells the reporter, “I'm 35 and I'm white."

Obviously.

We cut to scenes of our trans-racial teenage adult pretending the projects are the suburbs of Colorado.

He explains his Mom just  doesn't get it. Cut to her explaining, "I'd love to wake up and say I'm Rhianna but I 'aint"

Which as a white woman I’m going on brand with the appropriation I mentioned earlier and I just have to say: “preach sista!” If I get to come back as anyone in my next life I sure as fuck hope its Rhianna. Sometimes I ask myself what would Rhi Rhi do? and then I remember to just do me.

But I digress, our teen’s response to his mother’s dismissal is to explain that they don't "realize race is just a made up thing" and he doesn't believe in labels. Unwilling to accept this “reality” he is presently working on getting (yes) racial transition surgery while also stopping trying to convince others he's not "us". Ummm....

Rather than argue he tries to show his community he is not one of them by doing incredibly stand-up white male things like turning black guys into the cops.

This episode came out years before the recent onslaught of social media documenting black people having cops called on them  for doing very questionable things like sleeping in their own dorms but I still challenge you not to be laughing hysterically by this point.

As great as this storyline is though, who can complain when it's time to return to commercials?

First up a commercial break for Swisher Sweets (looks like I too was a trans-racial teenager). In the commercial all the actors are emptying the guts of their swishers to enjoy in between filming sets. Duh.

Quickly though, I want to admit that I am not doing this insanely perfect 30 minutes of remarkability justice —please watch! In the meantime though I return to Montague’s panel….

Paperboi admits to the audience he is afraid of being persecuted by the audience and does not feel comfortable speaking his mind. Our female white expert accuses him of being unable to have intelligent dialogue without spewing profanity (proving his point, of course). Montague continues by asking Al if he hates trans people because of his lack of a father.

If your head is spinning and you’re feeling ready to throw down you aren’t alone but Alfred handles the insanity with unbelievable levels of eloquence. He explains, ”It is hard for me to care about this because no one cares about me as a black man. Kaitlyn Jenner is just doing what white men have done since the dawn of time which is whatever the hell they want. Why should I care?"

He goes on to question where the tolerance is for him?

And yes, this is the crux of it.

It is far easier to speak out against intolerance when you are privileged.

The white expert agrees with his point but as is talk show nature Montague  keeps egging for the drama.

All getting a little too real? No worries, we have a commercial to lighten the emotions.

Or is it just more sad truth?

First up we have a commercial reminiscent of the 1-800-psychic infomercials of my youth. A perfect example of selling an ideal to the impoverished rather than a reality, and media assumingThe poor are an easy target as they are so desperate for a solution out of poverty they can easily be taken advantage of. Sadly, gullible.

Or maybe it is me that’s sad and I just don't believe in magic-- perhaps my cynicism is the problem?

A man (I believe the same guy from the bus in episode one) is offering us “the answers we deserve.” He goes on to talk about chakras and crystals and the power to make his customers rich.

"Call now and you get a free juice and Nutella sandwich" he proclaims.

And now I'm even more in love with this episode.

Cut to a Dodge Charger commercial concerning divorce settlements which is too complex to describe but also totally accurate and finally the episode’s piece de resistance -- a fully animated Coco Cruncherz commercial with a “black Trix bunny" being beaten up by a cop because he is trying to steal the kid's sugary morning treat (which is of course just for kids). As the kids plead with the cop to stop he argues that age old tag line Coco Cruncherz is for kids -- harking again back to my youth and Saturday morning cartoon days when the innocent commercials with a rabbit stealing breakfast was not nearly as menacing (or realistic).

And just like that with a seemingly sweet cartoon we have jumped the line from dangerously sinister satire to downright sadness. Nobody wants to see a cartoon cop beat the shit out of  a black cartoon  bunny especially in front of a bunch of cartoon kids.

And yet its still so funny and important.

Close commercials and we circle back to our black teen dressed like a white man. Alfred can't stop laughing at him "You look like Fellon Degeneres!"

But don’t feel sorry for this misunderstood teen to soon. When the trans expert welcomes him, the kid uses his new platform to spew his own stereotypes, explaining that marriage is meant for a man and woman and men can't turn into women. So while he believes in racial fluidity he is totally close-minded to gender fluidity.

Obviously.

This episode and how it speaks to acceptance of other cultures is fantastic but the commercials and the garbage peddled to lower classes and minorities specifically is crucial. If I was an American Studies High School teacher I think I could develop an entire semester’s worth of curriculum on these 20 minutes.

Episode eight, The Club features our motley crew at a club and clearly miserable about it. As a woman whose personal anthem is George Thorogood and the Destroyers I Drink Alone I couldn't possibly find this more relatable. The only reason why Alfred, Earn and Darius are even at the club in the first place is because Paperboi is being paid for the appearance.

Since I’ve already managed to drone on for close to 10,000 words and supplied an overwhelming amount of both series and personal anecdotes, for this episode briefing I’ll do my best to just take a moment or two for a quick review of a few standout moments and trust that you, dear reader, now have obtained a certain level of Sylvie’s Mind Mastery to elaborate on the now all too predictable consensus:  this episode is just as fabulously funny, sad, complicated and littered with omnipresent issues of social status as the next.

And now in side-splitting surrealist summation:

Earn on the dance floor with subtitles for his thoughts: "somebody smells like Wendy's Double Stack.

Darius showing the crew instagrams of a famous guy in the ‘hood who has a very fancy invisible car. Noteworthy: I thought Darius was just gullible at first but I clearly underestimated Glover’s dedication to metaphor. If you’re still confused by media’s dark comedy, magical realism, social commentaries on race (a new and now thanks in large part to Glover a very dominant genre) don't worry so am I.

Earn gets drunk enough to feel powerful and demand the money owed from the owner for Alfred's appearance and subsequently vomits all over him (sounds about right).

Darius has trouble getting through security after he steps out momentarily to blaze. Rather than put up too much of a fight he goes home to eat cereal and play video games (I'm pretty sure we will get married in season 3). 

Alfred and Earn go to beat up the club owner for trying to rip them off (by now vomit free). After the boys finally obtain what they are rightfully owed they leave the club, at last drunk enough to be  in a decent mood. While laughing and talking about getting food  they are startled by gun fire. People start to run but most of the crowd is maimed anyway as a man seated seemingly on nothing floats by (in an invisible car, clearly) and mows down the crowd.

This is so complex -- Donald Glover has completely lost me and yet I am obsessively curious. What does this mean? What does it say about our culture? Did he just think it was funny? Does the invisibility represent the utter bullshit of an expensive car? It must somehow tie back to status and violence but what is he saying exactly? I’m wary to even venture a guess.

Either way, The boys escape to Waffle House for a post mortem with Darius. The men are still drunk and laughing, moods still surprisingly upbeat though if you know anything about Southern Culture the very fact that this restaurant is still serving speaks volumes of the gravity (or lack thereof) of the violent incident. Things shift toward somber though as the local news streams through in the back ground. A story reporting the incident clearly lays suspected blame  on Paperboi. 

"Fuck the club," says Alfred.

Indeed.

Last year Juneteenth was finally brought into the average modern white person's rhetoric through a "holiday special" for the masses from the very funny (and carefully cultivated to expand mainstream America's mind) Blackish.

Atlanta's take on the holiday is of course slightly more subversive. Certainly due to its non-network and later time slot it is more carefree and able to cater less  to the masses. Nonetheless, I am certain that Atlanta’s episode managed to bring a bit of awareness even if the show -- unlike Blackish -- made zero attempts to educate the ignorant on what Juneteenth is exactly.  It doesn’t matter though, because well... Wikipedia... Glover is smart to assume that his audience is woke enough to use their pricey smartphones to look up whatever they don't already know. Maybe I should learn to employ a similar tactic.

Anyway, on Juneteenth Earn leisurely wakes and bakes in some random girls' bed. When his alarm goes off he is rushed into reality, panics and dashes out. Cut to him and Van in the car where she is very unimpressed that he is stoned which plays out in a passive aggressive fight over the automatic windows in her car. Although we don't know where they are going or why, it is made quite clear that this is an important outing for Van, and that Earn is complicity playing along basically because they have a child together.

They arrive at a fancy house, with a fancy valet and a fancy black woman named Monique answers the door. "happy Juneteenth," she proclaims and then proceeds to humble brag her home "we have so many bathrooms!”

Her white husband Craig makes a grand entrance also proclaiming "happy freedom day."

This is already a very strange party.

Earn retreats for drinks which he orders from a very condescending bartender in an African print bow tie.

"Emancipation Eggnog?" asks Earn "It's June!"

To which the Bartender replies "nigga do I have to explain alliteration to you?!"

Earn takes his beverage and wanders through the looming home finding the white husband, Craig’s office does nothing to alleviate the strangeness. The room is full of black art which Craig painted based on one of his favorite Malcolm X quotes. He explains to Earn that black musical artists are a product for white American consumption and appropriation. He pours them some Hennessy and is baffled that Earn hasn't been to Africa and also does not know where exactly he is from.

Just a side note all this has inspired my own bit of spinoff commercial satire: We all know by now that gene testing companies can provide a great deal of knowledge for White Europeans but usually lack the same insight into an African person’s roots and thusly all their televised advertising features a white person drinking whiskey in the Irish pub of their forefathers or celebrating an ancestors Viking victory. I think it’s high time someone (Preferably Glover and not me because I’m clearly far busier) wrote a commercial with a black person talking about the slave ship he learned his great great grandmother was shackle on etc etc.

Anyhow, Craig employs a specific style of appropriation (seemingly bred from his own white insecurity and guilt rather than ignorance or hate) to black shame the unassuming young man he has invited to drink in his home.

Earn retreats, whispering to Van that the party feels "very eyes wide shut." (Which I myself hadn't yet noticed but once brought to the periphery realize  could not be more accurate). Frustrated that Earn hasn't embraced her thing she asks him to “just once pretend that they aren't who they are so he doesn't blow this opportunity” for her.

He responds by bringing on what I’d like to classify as his very best "douche" (I know , I know, this is not the PC term) in order to impress the "very cultural" uptight, wealthy black people this party is full of.

Van seems to be binge drinking which, as is apt to happen eventually leads to a retreat for a bit of an overwhelmed bathroom cry.

Afterward she winds up outside with Monique who finally starts to reveal actual elements of her own humanity. "You don't think I know how crazy my husband is? Treating black people like a hobby?" And there it is — the thing I have been grappling with as I’ve attempted to blog this season of Atlanta over the course of a three-plus month period. At the end of the day it is safe to assume that the best I can really do is just repeat their story and really I have no shot at successful analyzation. Craig’s overwhelming analyzation is enough.

Van asks Monique if she wishes she had someone to confide in to which Monique responds with this equally telling quote. "It is redundant to be both black and sorry in the world."

With nowhere else to go they return to the party to find Craig performing a poetry slam on Jim Crow in front of his black guests’ and this is when shit hits the fan....

The party’s crew of valets find Earn and attempt to give him their sister's underwear to pass on to Paperboi (I can't even begin to understand why a brother would agree to this for his sister and I refuse to believe my ignorance is cultural). The gesture may be gross but it is relevant to this story's evolution because they have outed Earn as Paperboi’s “manager.” Monique's husband increases the awkwardness by bringing up the shooting. Oddly if memory serves this is the first time since episode two that the series opening incident has been directly referenced. Or maybe it isn't weird at all, maybe the whole point of this surreal show is nothing can be taken seriously enough to carry over to the next episode. Isn’t that the rule of thumb for sitcoms anyhow? Needless to say for the time being the fact that Earn is somebody and not the nobody Monique had assumed seems to make her quite uncomfortable to which Earn responds with spite. Fed up by a full day of clear hypocrisy he proclaims the very real observation that “this is all wack, its not real life and they are all dumb.”

Van rather emotionless attempts to drag her partner away, making it clear she knew  this all along.

“Stop stunning on me about culture,” Earn shouts. “I’m not going to go back to Africa to discover my roots cuz I’m fucking broke. Stop being so black-able!”

We cut to Earn driving home. He promises Van (with eyes closed next to him)  to call Monique in the morning to apologize.

Van opens her eyes demands he pull over and when he does she climbs on top of her man and starts banging him right there in the drivers' seat. In spite of it all they are young, have a baby and I think most importantly she is more attracted to his authenticity than the party's grandeur and faux behavior. The screen zooms out on the lovers in the middle of nowhere with the haunting lyrics of Chain Gang from Sam Cook and nothing seems so well earned and genuine than the freedom these two young black humans have to express their complicated love outdoors in Atlanta in June. Or maybe I'm just being romantic. So far as I know no one is actually  allowed to have sex in their cars outside of their own garage.

The season finale like many episodes starts with Earn waking up in someone else’s home. While this is a recurring start I somehow missed the trend until now. Perhaps that is attributable to the fact that our finale stresses the relevance of Earn’s homelessness. In this scene he is uncomfortably situated in a bean bag chair and being chastised for fucking up whomever's house he has crashed at.

“Where's my jacket?" Earn manages to ask a few times but the homeowner is too distracted with the destruction Earn has caused. So Earn leaves and calls Alfred who also has no idea where the jacket is. This is clearly a bummer for Earn but great news on my end. The missing clothing means we have some 20 odd minutes  ahead to enjoy Earn retracing the steps of a wasted night. This is a plot premise I have adored ever since Ashton Kutcher spoke to my very sensible 17-year-old- stoner- humor in Dude Where's My Car. I haven't watched the film in years and I know it gets a bad rap but I'd be hard pressed to believe that it doesn't stand the test of time. Since this is Atlanta though the surrealism is even more omnipresent than similar story arcs. 

As Earn travels through his home-town (True to its name Atlanta has remained one of the most crucial characters throughout the season) he notices that everyone is dressed as cows. He asks a stranger why the costumes "Free chicken sandwich day nigga,” he’s told

Duh.

So Earn gets his sandwich and in true Dude form heads to the strip club to see if his jacket might be there. Maybe Glover was also a fan of this fine film— we are the same age after all.

A wonderfully awkward and funny scene ensues where Earn tries to describe one stripper who might have his jacket to another stripper.

Largely unsuccessful (how does one describe one generic stripper to another?) the girl is more preoccupied anyhow, her focus being on getting herself cast in a Paperboi video.

Defeated, he defers to last night’s snapchat stories to recall where he went next. Had this technology existed 15 years ago maybe the Dudes also could have found their cars in 27 minutes.

Frustrated by his snaps, Earn instead goes to chastise Alfred for his inappropriate "stories" but Al explains social media is important work. "Rappers make money on appearances" to which Earn reaffirms it is a bad idea.

Darius chimes in "That's black people's number one problem, they don't know how to have fun."

"I don't think that's our number one problem," Earn says to which I laugh out loud. 

And then I laugh again just reading my notes on this episode. And then again during editing. I am proud of Earn for this comment. For the most part he tends to be slower than his buddies when it comes to off the cuff quips.

In a stalemate, Earn defers to ridesharing apps. And even though I'm pretty sure Uber does not actually work this way Alfred is able to call last night's car to try to locate Earn's jacket. Yes, this affirms it, late 90's technology or the lack there of is the only thing that made Dude realistic (to which of course I  understand it still wasn't at all but... y'know....).

Alfred agrees to pay the 50 dollars the Uber driver demands for the chore but is annoyed that he is back to bailing out his cousin. They sit in the car stoned and discuss Jamaican food in a relatable way that will make any stoner smile.

Then something big finally happens for Alfred. Something that could carry over to season 2 or slide into another dream like fantasy never to be mentioned again (both viable options given the strikingly realistic and terribly fantastical world Atlanta has created). Earn gets a call from a famous rapper, Senator K, requesting Paperboi open for his upcoming tour

But before they can get too excited Alfred says "something here is off" and tries to bail. Just then an undercover van pulls the group over.

The group of black men are then patted down for seemingly no reason and asked if they are tring to purchase illegal things from the driver.

Just a jacket they claim.

A small chase scene ensues and the Uber driver is shot down.

And now there is a dead man wearing Earn's jacket.

Earn looks devastated he tells the cops he left something “in there. Can they check the pockets?”

No dice.

So Alfred tries to cheer him up, gives him a roll of cash -- his 5% on the tour deal, affirms that Earn finally “did good.”

But Earn just awkwardly walks away, defaulting to his defeated little kid look in his short shorts and his backpack. He Stops briefly to dump a rock out of his shoe and then goes to Van's and cooks a family dinner. It is a brief sweet moment, interrupted by a friend stopping by to drop off Earn's key. "I've been looking for this all day." he tells him. The proverbial “car” has been retrieved.

Finally at ease Earn and Van retreat to the couch where he gives her the roll of cash. He really does want to support her. There is another sweet moment as the two lie on the couch laughing at how bad of a drug dealer he would be and she asks him to stay but again like a kid he and his back pack leave.

There is something sweet and promising here. A rarity in this funny but often self-defeating show.

Rather than use his friends and family Earn steps out— finally on his own for the night.

He goes to a storage unit and opens it with the key he spent the day looking for. We finally see that Earn is not entirely without a home. This lonely unit with a couch is what he has and clearly why he is consistently waking in other people's spaces. He takes off his shoe, and we realize he wasn't dumping a rock at all but using his sneaker as a bank. No matter, weather shaking out a pebble or stocking cash taking his shoe off in the street earlier must have been Earn’s first sense of relief this season.

[anotherwhorewatch]

Marco Polo

This is a first for this ‘rewatch’: not only is it the first reconstructed story I’m watching (I’m going for the black-and-white Loose Cannon recon, if anyone cares), but it’s also the first story I’ve never watched before in full. I’ve previously only seen the half-hour version on the Edge of Destruction DVD – and this is a seven-parter, so that version had to cut one or two things out.

Having given us seven weeks of hard science fiction and a two-act character play, we’ve circled back round to Doctor Who’s educational remit for a purely historical tale based around the real-life figure of Marco Polo. We do learn a bit about Polo, his relationships and his journey, but mostly he’s there as a friendly antagonist for the TARDIS crew to play against. Mark Eden does a sterling job as the charismatic Polo, who is charming enough that you can almost accept how readily the regulars accept their situation for much of the story.

Polo is widely regarded as one of Doctor Who’s great lost epics, and in some ways it’s easy to see why; in terrestrial terms the story covers a vast distance, and we’re periodically reminded of the amount of ground being traversed with the help of Indiana Jones-style maps and excerpts from Polo’s diaries. The existing photos suggest that this was a lavish production, with sets and costumes befitting the delay in this serial’s production. The BBC has always been good at producing period dramas, and this serial plays to those strengths.

The flip side of this is that not an awful lot actually happens in the story, and by the midpoint it starts to feel quite formulaic - arrive somewhere, have the TARDIS crew bicker with Marco and fail to get their key back, show Tegana looking a bit shifty and move to the next location. And it’s another anticlimax of an ending, as Marco eventually just shrugs and gives the Doctor his key back.

But what Marco Polo lacks in plot, it makes up for in character. The regulars may not have much to do in the story, but we get to spend a lot of time with them, and Susan in particular benefits as she befriends young servant Ping Cho - after the running with scissors incident in the last story, it’s a welcome change to see her just being a teenager for a while. Marco Polo may not quite live up to its reputation, but it’s a solid tale whose absence from the archives is a great shame.

Memorable Moments:

Ian and Barbara’s joy at being back on Earth at the start of the story is a nice moment after some pretty unrelenting misery for the unwitting travellers. The script spends just enough time touching on this arc before launching the pair into inquisitive adventure mode.

The Doctor’s absence from all but a single scene of episode two sticks out like a sore thumb, with the explanation that the old man is simply in his room having a sulk for the whole episode struggling to ring true. Certainly if any Doctor is going to have a sulk it’s Hartnell, but for him not to emerge during the raging sandstorm - especially when they learn his granddaughter is caught up in it - just feels wrong.

Speaking of the sandstorm, it’s a pretty horrible experience - both for the characters, in an already oppressive episode, and for the viewer; I have no idea what a sandstorm sounds like, but here the Radiophonic Workshop somehow manage to tap into the sound of hell.

The scenes between Tegana and Marco, particularly in episode two, are among the story’s most engaging; two charismatic antagonists trading double-edged barbs under the guise of civility, with a lot more being said between the two than it first appears.

Ping-Cho’s story in Part Three may bring proceedings to a grinding halt (Almost as much as when she decides to stop and look at some pretty fishies in Part Five), but it does inspire the first - and presumably the only - mention of hashish in Doctor Who. Purely medicinal, I’m sure.

A scene that doesn’t get served well by the reconstruction is the end of Part 3, in which Susan enters the cave which she’s been told contains hundreds of stone masks - and screams because she sees a stone mask. The recon contains a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it shot of human eyes behind the mask - but I blinked, I missed it, and the whole thing seemed pretty ridiculous until the start of the next episode, in which we’re reliably informed that the mask moved. Yeah, if you say so.

Either the sixties were a different time or the Doctor Who production team were massive racists, because Part Four introduces us to several ‘comedy characters’ with names like Ling Tau and Wang Lo - all played by Caucasian men in yellowface. It might be one of the few times that Doctor Who has actually made me want to hide behind the sofa.

On the plus side, Ian Chesterton pretending to be drunk is probably one of the greatest moments from Doctor Who’s history that are missing from the archives. If only we could see him staggering around while listening to him slur his words, I think the world would be a better place.

Something I’m glad we don’t have to see is William Hartnell exaggerating his aches and pains in Kublai Khan’s court - just listening to him over-egging it is bad enough. But I really like that they gave the Doctor a friend to bond over being past it with; it makes me wish Marco’s caravan had one fewer stop along the way and arrived at Khan’s palace much sooner.

And lastly, having spent two whole episodes building it up, Ping Cho’s arranged marriage subplot is waved away with a comment that her intended has died off screen. Granted, it was one of the less important storylines that needed wrapping up, but you have to wonder why they bothered to introduce it at all if they were going to throw it away in such an offhand manner.

Lingering Questions:

I’m sure many of us have been guilty of letting people take advantage of our good nature at some point in our lives, but it’s hard not to wonder about Marco Polo here. He extends the hand of friendship to the Doctor and friends, and in return they spend seven episodes bickering with him and then plotting and scheming behind his back. They’re also a considerable drain on Polo’s already stretched resources, and yet Marco remains kind to them throughout, through some sort of misplaced code of ethics. Why, particularly after the Doctor calls him a ‘poor, pathetic, stupid savage’, doesn’t Marco just leave these idiots in the desert to rot?

This question might be a bit of a cheat, given that we now know plenty of things about the TARDIS that neither the viewers nor writers were aware of back in 1964, but exactly how had the TARDIS, whose dimensions are practically infinite, run out of water? Had the Doctor drained the swimming pool? Had Ian gone in and swiped the last of the orange juice from the cricket pavilion? Were the TARDIS gardens experiencing a particularly dry winter?

One that seems less forgiveable is the notion of condensation gathering in the TARDIS because of the temperature differential. Though we’ve not seen it put to the test in any extreme way, the interior and exterior dimensions of the ship are clearly separate; it’s a central conceit of the series. You can heat the exterior up as much as you like, but the interior shouldn’t be affected - certainly not by such a piffling difference. Doctor Who should have ended with the Doctor and friends dying a slow and painful death in the desert, and I will fight anyone who says otherwise.

The biggest question of all, though; after Marco explicitly tells Ian that he would happily give them the TARDIS key back if they could prove that they were from another place and time, why in the name of all that is holy does Ian not immediately show him the inside of the TARDIS? Job done, we can spend an extra week on Marinus instead. Actually, when I put it like that...

[terabitweb]

Original Post from Krebs on Security Author: BrianKrebs

In April 2013, I received via U.S. mail more than a gram of pure heroin as part of a scheme to get me arrested for drug possession. But the plan failed and the Ukrainian mastermind behind it soon after was imprisoned for unrelated cybercrime offenses. That individual recently gave his first interview since finishing his jail time here in the states, and he’s shared some select (if often abrasive and coarse) details on how he got into cybercrime and why. Below are a few translated excerpts.

When I first encountered now-31-year-old Sergei “Fly,” “Flycracker,” “MUXACC” Vovnenko in 2013, he was the administrator of the fraud forum “thecc[dot]bz,” an exclusive and closely guarded Russian language board dedicated to financial fraud and identity theft.

Many of the heavy-hitters from other fraud forums had a presence on Fly’s forum, and collectively the group financed and ran a soup-to-nuts network for turning hacked credit card data into mounds of cash.

Vovnenko first came onto my radar after his alter ego Fly published a blog entry that led with an image of my bloodied, severed head and included my credit report, copies of identification documents, pictures of our front door, information about family members, and so on. Fly had invited all of his cybercriminal friends to ruin my financial identity and that of my family.

Somewhat curious about what might have precipitated this outburst, I was secretly given access to Fly’s cybercrime forum and learned he’d freshly hatched a plot to have heroin sent to my home. The plan was to have one of his forum lackeys spoof a call from one of my neighbors to the police when the drugs arrived, complaining that drugs were being delivered to our house and being sold out of our home by Yours Truly.

Thankfully, someone on Fly’s forum also posted a link to the tracking number for the drug shipment. Before the smack arrived, I had a police officer come out and take a report. After the heroin showed up, I gave the drugs to the local police and wrote about the experience in Mail From the Velvet Cybercrime Underground.

Angry that I’d foiled the plan to have me arrested for being a smack dealer, Fly or someone on his forum had a local florist send a gaudy floral arrangement in the shape of a giant cross to my home, complete with a menacing message that addressed my wife and was signed, “Velvet Crabs.”

The floral arrangement that Fly or one of his forum lackeys had delivered to my home in Virginia.

Vovnenko was arrested in Italy in the summer of 2014 on identity theft and botnet charges, and spent some 15 months in arguably Italy’s worst prison contesting his extradition to the United States. Those efforts failed, and he soon pleaded guilty to aggravated identity theft and wire fraud, and spent several years bouncing around America’s prison system.

Although Vovnenko sent me a total of three letters from prison in Naples (a hand-written apology letter and two friendly postcards), he never responded to my requests to meet him following his trial and conviction on cybercrime charges in the United States. I suppose that is fair: To my everlasting dismay, I never responded to his Italian dispatches (the first I asked to be professionally analyzed and translated before I would touch it).

Seasons greetings from my pen pal, Flycracker.

After serving his 41 month sentence in the U.S., Vovnenko was deported, although it’s unclear where he currently resides (the interview excerpted here suggests he’s back in Italy, but Fly doesn’t exactly confirm that). 

In an interview published on the Russian-language security blog Krober[.]biz, Vovnenko said he began stealing early in life, and by 13 was already getting picked up for petty robberies and thefts.

A translated English version of the interview was produced and shared with KrebsOnSecurity by analysts at New York City-based cyber intelligence firm Flashpoint.

Sometime in the mid-aughts, Vovnenko settled with his mother in Naples, Italy, but he had trouble keeping a job for more than a few days. Until a chance encounter led to a front job at a den of thieves.

“When I came to my Mom in Naples, I could not find a permanent job. Having settled down somewhere at a new job, I would either get kicked out or leave in the first two days. I somehow didn’t succeed with employment until I was invited to work in a wine shop in the historical center of Naples, where I kinda had to wipe the dust from the bottles. But in fact, the wine shop turned out to be a real den and a sales outlet of hashish and crack. So my job was to be on the lookout and whenever the cops showed up, take a bag of goods and leave under the guise of a tourist.”

Cocaine and hash were plentiful at his employer’s place of work, and Vovnenko said he availed himself of both abundantly. After he’d saved enough to buy a computer, Fly started teaching himself how to write programs and hack stuff. He quickly became enthralled with the romanticized side of cybercrime — the allure of instant cash — and decided this was his true vocation.

“After watching movies and reading books about hackers, I really wanted to become a sort of virtual bandit who robs banks without leaving home,” Vovnenko recalled. “Once, out of curiosity, I wrote an SMS bomber that used a registration form on a dating site, bypassing the captcha through some kind of rookie mistake in the shitty code. The bomber would launch from the terminal and was written in Perl, and upon completion of its work, it gave out my phone number and email. I shared the bomber somewhere on one of my many awkward sites.”

“And a couple of weeks later they called me. Nah, not the cops, but some guy who comes from Sri Lanka who called himself Enrico. He told me that he used my program and earned a lot of money, and now he wants to share some of it with me and hire me. By a happy coincidence, the guy also lived in Naples.”

“When we met in person, he told me that he used my bomber to fuck with a telephone company called Wind. This telephone company had such a bonus service: for each incoming SMS you received two cents on the balance. Well, of course, this guy bought a bunch of SIM cards and began to bomb them, getting credits and loading them into his paid lines, similar to how phone sex works.”

But his job soon interfered with his drug habit, and he was let go.

“At the meeting, Enrico gave me 2K euros, and this was the first money I’ve earned, as it is fashionable to say these days, on ‘cybercrime’. I left my previous job and began to work closely with Enrico. But always stoned out of my mind, I didn’t do a good job and struggled with drug addiction at that time. I was addicted to cocaine, as a result, I was pulling a lot more money out of Enrico than my work brought him. And he kicked me out.”

After striking out on his own, Vovnenko says he began getting into carding big time, and was introduced to several other big players on the scene. One of those was a cigarette smuggler who used the nickname Ponchik (“Doughnut”).

I wonder if this is the same Ponchik who was arrested in 2013 as being the mastermind behind the Blackhole exploit kit, a crimeware package that fueled an overnight explosion in malware attacks via Web browser vulnerabilities.

In any case, Vovnenko had settled on some schemes that were generating reliably large amounts of cash.

“I’ve never stood still and was not focusing on carding only, with the money I earned, I started buying dumps and testing them at friends’ stores,” Vovnenko said. “Mules, to whom I signed the hotlines, were also signed up for cashing out the loads, giving them a mere 10 percent for their work. Things seemed to be going well.”

FAN MAIL

There is a large chronological gap in Vovnenko’s account of his cybercrime life story from that point on until the time he and his forum friends started sending heroin, large bags of feces and other nasty stuff to our Northern Virginia home in 2013.

Vovnenko claims he never sent anything and that it was all done by members of his forum.

-Tell me about the packages to Krebs. “That ain’t me. Suitcase filled with sketchy money, dildoes, and a bouquet of coffin wildflowers. They sent all sorts of crazy shit. Forty or so guys would send. When I was already doing time, one of the dudes sent it. By the way, Krebs wanted to see me. But the lawyer suggested this was a bad idea. Maybe he wanted to look into my eyes.”

In one part of the interview, Fly is asked about but only briefly touches on how he was caught. I wanted to add some context here because this part of the story is richly ironic, and perhaps a tad cathartic.

Around the same time Fly was taking bitcoin donations for a fund to purchase heroin on my behalf, he was also engaged to be married to a nice young woman. But Fly apparently did not fully trust his bride-to-be, so he had malware installed on her system that forwarded him copies of all email that she sent and received.

Fly,/Flycracker discussing the purchase of a gram of heroin from Silk Road seller “10toes.”

But Fly would make at least two big operational security mistakes in this spying effort: First, he had his fiancée’s messages forwarded to an email account he’d used for plenty of cybercriminal stuff related to his various “Fly” identities.

Mistake number two was the password for his email account was the same as one of his cybercrime forum admin accounts. And unbeknownst to him at the time, that forum was hacked, with all email addresses and hashed passwords exposed.

Soon enough, investigators were reading Fly’s email, including the messages forwarded from his wife’s account that had details about their upcoming nuptials, such as shipping addresses for their wedding-related items and the full name of Fly’s fiancée. It didn’t take long to zero in on Fly’s location in Naples.

While it may sound unlikely that a guy so immeshed in the cybercrime space could make such rookie security mistakes, I have found that a great many cybercriminals actually have worse operational security than the average Internet user.

I suspect this may be because the nature of their activities requires them to create vast numbers of single- or brief-use accounts, and in general they tend to re-use credentials across multiple sites, or else pick very poor passwords — even for critical resources.

In addition to elaborating on his hacking career, Fly talks a great deal about his time in various prisons (including their culinary habits), and an apparent longing or at least lingering fondness for the whole carding scene in general.

Towards the end, Fly says he’s considering going back to school, and that he may even take up information security as a study. I wish him luck in that whatever that endeavor is as long as he can also avoid stealing from people.

I don’t know what I would have written many years ago to Fly had I not been already so traumatized by receiving postal mail from him. Perhaps it would go something like this:

“Dear Fly: Thank you for your letters. I am very sorry to hear about the delays in your travel plans. I wish you luck in all your endeavors — and I sincerely wish the next hopeful opportunity you alight upon does not turn out to be a pile of shit.”

The entire translated interview is here (PDF). Fair warning: Many readers may find some of the language and topics discussed in the interview disturbing or offensive.

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Go to Source Author: BrianKrebs Interview With the Guy Who Tried to Frame Me for Heroin Possession Original Post from Krebs on Security Author: BrianKrebs In April 2013, I received via U.S. mail more than a gram of pure heroin as part of a scheme to get me arrested for drug possession.

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Frequently Asked Queries About Marijuana Usage in Colorado

Very first and foremost, the basic guidelines of legalized leisure marijuana drug use are: • Coloradoans might only possess or obtain 1 ounce of cannabis at a time. • Smoking, vaporizing, or consuming cannabis in general public areas (I.e., Crimson Rocks Coors Field 16th Avenue Shopping mall parking heaps or airports) is completely forbidden. • Driving under the affect of cannabis is illegal. So, all Coloradoans can use cannabis for satisfaction now? Correct--to an extent. All authorized people of Colorado 21 several years and more mature could possess, use, display, obtain, or transport one ounce (virtually sixty joints) or less of marijuana for recreational use. Even so, many cities and counties have passed their very own amendments to make issues these kinds of as marijuana developing facilities or retail pot outlets unlawful (here is seeking at you, Colorado Springs, Westminster, and Centennial!). Likewise, your employer has the right to produce his or her personal policies with regards to cannabis use amongst employees-even in the privateness of their possess properties. Given that cannabis is lawful in Colorado, petty drug offenses aren't that massive a offer anymore, right? This is a typical misunderstanding. The federal government still considers marijuana illegal, which means any evidence that you have partaken in or bought the drug could impact your federal college student loans, specific employment positions, and social positive aspects these kinds of as meals stamps or public housing. In addition, drug offenses will often show up on your history checks. I am 21 several years outdated could I share my weed with my 18-year-previous brother? No way. You are not able to offer marijuana to any person young than 21-even if it truly is free and not for monetary payment. Also, the zero-tolerance law means people under 21 face an automatic loss of their license if they are identified driving underneath the influence of cannabis. Can I resell the weed I bought lawfully? No. You may, nevertheless, reward an individual above 21 up to one ounce of cannabis-as extended as you will find no trade of funds included. If my higher education roommate visits me from Alabama, do all these regulations utilize to him as nicely? Only if he has a government-issued Colorado ID. Non-citizens may acquire up to ¼ an ounce of marijuana for each transaction, whereas they may possibly possess one particular entire ounce at a time. Basically, your friend could make four diverse buys in a single working day, but that is a grey situation where the repercussions, or lack thereof, just are not specific so significantly. Is there a lawful restrict for how significantly weed I can have in my technique and nonetheless generate? The lawful restrict is 5 nanograms or much less of delta 9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC, the active ingredient in cannabis) per milliliter in total blood. This isn't really a fantastic measurement due to the fact various strains of cannabis carry various potencies of THC also, people metabolize the drug at considerably far more varied charges than liquor. For this cause, you may likely never see a chart that tells you how a lot of joints or brownies are too numerous to get guiding the wheel. How is the volume of marijuana in my body tested? If they have a justifiable cause, law enforcement officers suspicious of drugged driving will ask for a blood attract. As this Westword write-up points out, nonetheless, these blood exams have not yet been refined and they can be instead inaccurate. In this scenario, the reporter's blood test showed that he was seriously stoned hrs soon after he had last smoked anything at all. Other experts think people construct up a tolerance to the drug and they may possibly nevertheless be sober at 5 nanograms. I urge you to extremely consider refusing the blood take a look at if the scenario arises. If you do consider the take a look at, make sure you protected a single of the blood samples to reaffirm the final results independently later on. You imply I is not going to have to pee in a cup? A urine take a look at has no benefit when it will come to cannabis simply because traces of the drug may possibly present up in your program extended right after you happen to be sober. A blood take a look at is the only correct indicator of lively THC at the minute. How long do the authorities have to conduct the blood check? With liquor, they need to prove a person's BAC (blood alcohol content material) is .08 per cent or far more inside two several hours of driving. They have not issued a defined time time period for drug screening nevertheless but, rest certain, it will be some thing "sensible." Will I drop my license if I refuse the blood check? Perhaps. As with DUIs, you could shed your license for a yr if you refuse the blood examination. Unlike drunk driving though, there will not be any administrative penalties on your record this is crucial simply because marijuana intake carries on to be banned at the federal amount. Keep in mind, nevertheless, that you can often politely decline to do the standardized field sobriety checks (strolling in a straight line, reciting the alphabet backwards, and so on.) with out penalty. Why should I refuse to consider a standardized discipline sobriety examination? In limited, there are unique checks developed for assessing drug intoxication and not every single police officer is skilled in these very nevertheless. Legislation enforcement officers uneducated in marijuana recognition certainly is not going to aid your case as they do not have the methods to make an precise judgment of your sobriety. Wait, so will I be arrested if I have any traces of marijuana in my body? No, the mere existence of hashish in your blood is not a enough reason to arrest you. Additionally, obtaining 5 nanograms or much more of marijuana in your program is not enough to routinely convict you of a DUID either if you had a BAC of .08 per cent or far more, on the other hand, you would automatically be charged with drunk driving. Everyone's declaring cannabis is safer than alcoholic beverages what is the hazard in driving stoned? Studies display marijuana consumption has an effect on spatial perceptions, that means drugged drivers have slower response times and tend to swerve or tailgate other vehicles a lot more often. Consider about these traditional stoner film scenes the place the dudes are totally fascinated by the dimensions of their hands would you want them driving you down I-twenty five? I'm a medical-marijuana person does this make me an easy goal for DUID checks? It shouldn't. According to a Colorado monthly bill, a person's healthcare-marijuana status (I.e., a legitimate healthcare-marijuana registry ID) can't be employed as evidence of impairment or probable result in for a blood check. Can I at least generate all around with cannabis merchandise? As with alcoholic beverages, it is illegal to drive with an open up container of marijuana undertaking so will result in a targeted traffic infraction that shows up on federal checks (as I explained previously). The law applies to anything that contains cannabis that is open or has a broken seal, or has partly-taken out contents. The greatest suggestions I can provide at this point is to preserve it as significantly out of reach as feasible. In simple fact, Place IT IN THE TRUNK. My car doesn't have a trunk. Okay, as with Vape pen , there are particular exceptions. If you generate an SUV or minivan, you could preserve unsealed cannabis guiding the very last row of upright seats. Open up cannabis is also authorized in the residing quarters of trailers or motor homes. Can I smoke/consume weed in the vehicle if I am not the driver? No. Individuals in the passenger region of a car cannot use or eat cannabis, and the no open up- container law applies to them as well. Whilst we're at it, you also can not smoke marijuana in a taxi or on public transportation. You may, nevertheless, smoke cannabis if you are in the rear of a privately-hired vehicle. As long as I purchase the pot lawfully in Colorado, can I take it to other states? Absolutely not--not even to Washington. First of all, bear in head the TSA is a federal establishment and that marijuana is banned at all airports, including DIA. You cannot fly with the drug, and truly, you can not even depart marijuana in your auto at the airport that would count as unlawful possession and matter you to a heavy good. Secondly, our neighboring states are cracking down on these driving into their borders with weed obtained in Colorado. Wyoming, for example, will not even acknowledge a Colorado-issued healthcare-cannabis card and will make arrests for unlawful possession appropriately.

[feastwaiter6-blog]

Regularly Questioned Concerns About Marijuana Utilization in Colorado

First and foremost, the simple policies of legalized leisure marijuana drug use are: • Coloradoans might only have or obtain one ounce of cannabis at a time. • Yocan evolve plus two , vaporizing, or consuming hashish in general public areas (I.e., Purple Rocks Coors Area sixteenth Road Mall parking heaps or airports) is definitely forbidden. • Driving underneath the influence of cannabis is illegal. So, all Coloradoans can use marijuana for satisfaction now? Proper--to an extent. All lawful citizens of Colorado 21 many years and more mature could possess, use, screen, obtain, or transport one ounce (virtually 60 joints) or significantly less of cannabis for recreational use. Nonetheless, many metropolitan areas and counties have passed their own amendments to make things this sort of as marijuana growing amenities or retail pot retailers illegal (here is looking at you, Colorado Springs, Westminster, and Centennial!). Equally, your employer has the appropriate to produce his or her very own guidelines relating to cannabis use amongst employees-even in the privacy of their very own residences. Considering that marijuana is authorized in Colorado, petty drug offenses aren't that massive a offer anymore, right? This is a frequent misunderstanding. The federal authorities even now considers marijuana unlawful, which indicates any evidence that you have partaken in or purchased the drug could impact your federal student loans, certain employment positions, and social rewards this kind of as meals stamps or community housing. Additionally, drug offenses will always display up on your track record checks. I'm 21 several years previous could I share my weed with my eighteen-yr-outdated brother? No way. You are not able to offer marijuana to any individual young than 21-even if it's cost-free and not for financial compensation. Also, the zero-tolerance law signifies people underneath 21 experience an automatic decline of their license if they are identified driving beneath the affect of cannabis. Can I resell the weed I acquired lawfully? No. You might, nevertheless, gift somebody more than 21 up to 1 ounce of marijuana-as extended as there is certainly no trade of funds concerned. If my school roommate visits me from Alabama, do all these legal guidelines utilize to him as properly? Only if he has a federal government-issued Colorado ID. Non-residents may purchase up to ¼ an ounce of cannabis for each transaction, whereas they may possess one particular entire ounce at a time. Primarily, your pal could make four different purchases in a single day, but that's a gray issue the place the implications, or deficiency thereof, just aren't specific so much. Is there a authorized limit for how much weed I can have in my method and nevertheless drive? The legal limit is five nanograms or considerably less of delta 9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC, the energetic component in cannabis) for each milliliter in total blood. This isn't a fantastic measurement since diverse strains of marijuana carry various potencies of THC also, men and women metabolize the drug at significantly more diverse rates than liquor. For this reason, you may most likely by no means see a chart that tells you how numerous joints or brownies are also many to get powering the wheel. How is the sum of cannabis in my body analyzed? If they have a justifiable purpose, legislation enforcement officials suspicious of drugged driving will request a blood draw. As this Westword write-up points out, nevertheless, these blood checks have not but been refined and they can be fairly inaccurate. In this scenario, the reporter's blood test confirmed that he was intensely stoned hrs soon after he experienced previous smoked everything. Other authorities feel individuals develop up a tolerance to the drug and they may possibly even now be sober at five nanograms. I urge you to extremely consider refusing the blood test if the predicament arises. If you do take the check, make positive you safe one particular of the blood samples to reaffirm the final results independently later on. You imply I is not going to have to pee in a cup? A urine examination has no value when it will come to cannabis since traces of the drug might display up in your technique lengthy following you happen to be sober. A blood check is the only precise indicator of energetic THC at the moment. How extended do the authorities have to perform the blood take a look at? With alcohol, they need to demonstrate a person's BAC (blood alcoholic beverages content) is .08 p.c or more inside two hrs of driving. They have not issued a defined time interval for drug tests but but, rest assured, it will be some thing "realistic." Will I drop my license if I refuse the blood take a look at? Potentially. As with DUIs, you could shed your license for a 12 months if you refuse the blood take a look at. Not like drunk driving although, there will not be any administrative penalties on your record this is essential because marijuana intake proceeds to be banned at the federal amount. Remember, nevertheless, that you can usually politely drop to do the standardized area sobriety assessments (strolling in a straight line, reciting the alphabet backwards, and so on.) without having penalty. Why ought to I refuse to consider a standardized field sobriety test? In short, there are specific assessments created for assessing drug intoxication and not each law enforcement officer is trained in these very however. Law enforcement officials uneducated in marijuana recognition undoubtedly will not likely aid your scenario as they don't have the resources to make an correct judgment of your sobriety. Wait, so will I be arrested if I have any traces of marijuana in my body? No, the mere presence of hashish in your blood is not a sufficient cause to arrest you. In addition, possessing 5 nanograms or far more of marijuana in your technique is not enough to instantly convict you of a DUID either if you had a BAC of .08 per cent or a lot more, on the other hand, you would immediately be charged with drunk driving. Everyone's expressing marijuana is safer than alcohol what is actually the risk in driving stoned? Research present marijuana use impacts spatial perceptions, indicating drugged drivers have slower response moments and have a tendency to swerve or tailgate other vehicles far more often. Think about these basic stoner movie scenes where the dudes are absolutely fascinated by the measurement of their hands would you want them driving you down I-25? I'm a medical-cannabis user does this make me an easy focus on for DUID checks? It should not. According to a Colorado bill, a person's healthcare-cannabis position (I.e., a legitimate health-related-cannabis registry ID) are not able to be utilized as proof of impairment or probable trigger for a blood check. Can I at the very least drive all around with marijuana merchandise? As with alcoholic beverages, it is illegal to drive with an open up container of cannabis performing so will consequence in a targeted traffic infraction that displays up on federal checks (as I described previously). The regulation applies to anything at all containing cannabis that is open up or has a damaged seal, or has partly-removed contents. The best suggestions I can supply at this point is to keep it as significantly out of get to as attainable. In simple fact, Set IT IN THE TRUNK. My vehicle isn't going to have a trunk. All right, as with all principles, there are specific exceptions. If you travel an SUV or minivan, you could maintain unsealed marijuana powering the last row of upright seats. Open up marijuana is also permitted in the living quarters of trailers or motor properties. Can I smoke/eat weed in the vehicle if I am not the driver? No. Men and women in the passenger location of a automobile can't use or eat cannabis, and the no open up- container legislation applies to them as properly. Although we are at it, you also cannot smoke marijuana in a taxi or on general public transportation. You might, nevertheless, smoke cannabis if you are in the rear of a privately-hired auto. As prolonged as I purchase the pot lawfully in Colorado, can I just take it to other states? Absolutely not--not even to Washington. To start with, bear in mind the TSA is a federal establishment and that marijuana is banned at all airports, including DIA. You are not able to fly with the drug, and actually, you can't even leave cannabis in your auto at the airport that would rely as illegal possession and subject you to a heavy good. Next, our neighboring states are cracking down on individuals driving into their borders with weed bought in Colorado. Wyoming, for instance, is not going to even understand a Colorado-issued medical-cannabis card and will make arrests for illegal possession appropriately.