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piratewithvigor · 4 years

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My first thought in regard to every band that gets played on my radio station

ACDC: Every dad’s favourite band

Adams, Bryan: Every mom’s favourite singer until Michael Buble came along

Aerosmith: haha they thought Vince Neil was a lady

Alice Cooper: he’s a Game Of Thrones fanboy and I have proof

Alice In Chains: my sister doesn’t like them because she decided AC were Alice Cooper’s initials ONLY

Allman Brothers Band: good music for dropping acid to

Allman, Gregg: That’s too many Gs for one name

Animals: House Of The Rising Sun, or who even cares

Argent: Sometimes Hold Your Head Up is really catchy

Asia: Tuesdays

Autograph: one of the members went on to be a pharmacist

Bachman-Turner Overdrive: There are just so many pop culture jokes about Taking Care Of Business that whatever I say won’t be as funny

Bad Company: with their song; Bad Company, off their album; Bad Company

Benatar, Pat: Always getting her confused with Patti Smith

Black Crowes: I like them for Lickin, but it doesn’t seem to exist outside of one shoddy video on youtube and my old CD

Blackfoot: this band name feels kind of racy

Black Sabbath: Dio was not better or worse than Ozzy; just different

Blondie: I like Call Me, but Blondie confuses me stylistically

Blue Oyster Cult: MORE COWBELL

Bon Jovi: Hello, childhood trauma, I missed you

Boston: ONE GUY. ONE GUY DID IT ALL AND NO ONE KNOWS

Bowie, David: Don’t let your children watch The Man Who Fell To Earth, or David Bowie’s will end up being the third penis they see in life

Browne, Jackson: Another musician ruined by Supernatural

Buffalo Springfield: Jack Nicholson was at the riot they sing about

Burdon, Eric: no ideas, brain empty

Bush: ditto

Candlebox: ditto once more. Who are these people?

Cars: This band feels so gay and so straight at the same time, I can only assume they’re the poster children of bisexual panic

Cheap Trick: I played Dream Police on Guitar Hero so fucking much because it was the only song anyone who played with me could keep up with

Chicago: Chicago 30 exists, but they do not have 30 albums. Fucking riddle me that

Clapton, Eric: 6 discs in one Greatest Hits is too many. That’s called “re releasing your discography”

Cochrane, Tom: For some reason, everyone thinks Rascal Flats did it better

Cocker, Joe: Belushi did it right

Collective Soul: who?

Collins, Phil: If his biggest hits were done by MCR, they would be emo anthems, but because he’s 5′6″ and from the 80s, they’re not

Cream: *Vietnam flashbacks on the hippie side*

CCR: *Vietnam flashbacks on the war side*

CSNY: David Crosby; meh

Deep Purple: THEY’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN SMOKE ON THE WATER

Def Leppard: the only music for when you’re a heartbroken bitch but also a sexy one

Derek And The Dominos: Clapton and ‘Layla’ broke up

Derringer, Rick: Tom Petty if he was from the midwest

Dio: You thought it was an anime reference, but it was me, Dio

Dire Straits: You can tell how bigoted a radio station is based on how much of Money For Nothing they censor

Doobie Brothers: I have yet to smoke weed, but I listen to the Doobies, and I think that’s pretty close

Dylan, Bob: I take back everything I said about him in my youth

Eagles: Hotel California isn’t their best song, but the memes that come from it are second to none

Edgar Winter Group: @the--blackdahlia

Electric Light Orchestra: Actually an orchestra and sound a fuckton like George Harrison

ELO: I really hesitate to ask what happens with the 7 virgins and a mule

Essex, David: no prominent memories of him

Fabulous Thunderbirds: cannot spell

Faces: Who on earth thought that was a good album name?

Faith No More: I got nothing

Fixx: One Thing Leads To Another is a damn bop

Fleetwood Mac: I ain’t straight, but I’m simply not enough of a witch to enjoy them to full potential

Fogerty, John: He got sued cause he sounded like himself

Foghat: Slow Ride slowly becoming less coherent feels like a drug trip

Foo Fighters: He was just excited to buy a grill

Ford, Lita: deserved better

Foreigner: dramatically overplayed

Frampton, Peter: a masterful user of the talk box

Free: dramatically underplayed

Gabriel, Peter: leaving Genesis changed him a lot

Genesis: if someone likes Genesis, clarify the era, because yes, it does matter

Georgia Satellites: sing like you have a cactus in your ass

Golden Earring: Twilight Zone slaps, but it doesn’t slap as hard as this station thinks it does

Grand Funk Railroad: Funk

Grateful Dead: I like their aesthetic more than their music

Great White: there are so many fucking shark jokes

Greenbaum, Norman: makes me think of Subway for some reason

Green Day: the first of the emo revolution

Greg Kihn Band: RocKihnRoll is literally the most clever album name I’ve ever seen

Guns N Roses: They have more than three good songs, but radio stations never recognize that

Hagar, Sammy: I’m still trying to figure out where he lived to take 16 hours to get to LA driving 55 and how fucking fast was he driving beforehand?

Harrison, George: He went from religious to rock, and if he had continued rocking, he would have gotten too cool

Head East: I respect people who use breakfast foods as album names

Heart: Magic Man and Barracuda are played at least once every goddamn day. They’re not even the best songs!

Hendrix, Jimi: I have both a cousin and a sibling named after Hendrix references

Henley, Don: Dirty Laundry gives me too much inspiration

Hollies: Somehow sound like they’re both from the 60s and the 80s at the same time

Idol, Billy: he’s doing well for himself

INXS: Terminator vibes

Iris, Donnie: knockoff Roy Orbison

James Gang: too many funks

Jane’s Addiction: if TMNT had a grunge band representative

Jefferson Airplane: *assorted cheers*

Jefferson Starship: *assorted boos*

Jethro Tull: The only band to make you feel not cool enough to play the flute

Jett, Joan: icon

J. Geils Band: I requested them on the radio once and it got played

Joel, Billy: he really did just air everybody’s business like that

John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band: literally wtf is that name

John, Elton: yarn Elton sits in my basement, unstaring. Please someone take him from me

Joplin, Janis: Queen

Journey: Stop overplaying Don’t Stop Believing. It takes away from the rest of the repetoire

Judas Priest: literally started the gay leather aesthetic

Kansas: another fucking band Supernatural stole

Kenny Wayne Shepherd: the man confuses me to the point where he isn’t in the right place alphabetically

Kiss: Mick Mars and I will simply have to disagree on the subject

Kravitz, Lenny: runaway vibes

Led Zeppelin: Fucking fight me if you don’t think they’re the most talented band (maybe not the most talented individually, but collectively, no one comes close)

Lennon, John: My least favourite Beatle for reasons

Live: I got nothin

Living Colour: slap a decent amount

Loverboy: do you not get TURNT the fuck up to the big Loverboy hits? Who hurt you??

Lynyrd Skynyrd: Sweet Home Alabama is a Neil Young diss track

Marshall Tucker Band: no opinion

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band: VERY STRONG OPINIONS THAT THEY AREN’T GOOD

McCartney, Paul/Wings: Power couple

Meatloaf: I have nothing but respect for a man who willingly named himself Meatloaf

Mellencamp, John: voted cutest lesbian of 1987

Metallica: I liked their appearance on Jimmy Fallon

Midnight Oil: I get them confused for Talking Heads a lot

Modern English: who?

Molly Hatchet: Hollies vibes, but also Georgia Satellites vibes

Money, Eddie: DAN AVIDAN, IF YOU SEE THIS, COVER TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT

Motley Crue: Stan Mick Mars and John Corabi. They’re the only ones who deserve it

Mott The Hoople: no one loves them except for David Bowie

Mountain: props for naming an album ‘Climbing’

Nazareth: I want to make a John Mulaney joke here, but I can never come up with one

Nicks, Stevie: witch queen

Night Ranger: I get them confused with Urge Overkill

Nirvana: Kurt Cobain was the ally grunge needed

Nova, Aldo: he’s Canadian, at least

Nugent, Ted: *serves a ghost as jerky*

Offspring: nothing here

Osbourne, Ozzy: this bitch crazy

Outfield: Your Love is kind of a sketchy song, but it slaps hard

Palmer, Robert: low quality Eddie Money

Pearl Jam: *grunts in Eddie Vedder*

Petty, Tom: I have so many feelings about Tom Petty and they are all good

Pink Floyd: which one is Pink?

Plant, Robert: solo career is a crapshoot, but his voice is unparalleled

Poison: I want them to write a song called ‘Alice Cooper’

Pretenders: I want to say good things, but I have nothing to say

Queen: A doctor of astrophysics, a screaming girl, a disco queen and a diva walk into a bar. It’s Queen; they’re there to play a gig

Queensryche: neutral opinion

Quiet Riot: they got big because of a song they hated. I love that

Rafferty, Gerry: the second-sexiest sax opening in all of music

Rainbow: Ritchie Blackmore created something very magnificent

Ram Jam: one good song and they didn’t even write it

Ratt: I’m sure they have more than Round And Round, but I don’t know it

RHCP: funky, but if you have paid money to hear them, you’re going to The Bad Place (I don’t make the rules)

Red Rider: basically Golden Earring

Reed, Lou: Walk On The Wild Side would be such a cool song if it wasn’t so dull

REM: American Tragically Hip

REO Speedwagon: Props for having a dad joke as an album title

Rolling Stones: Never in my life could I imagine the drummer being named anything but Charlie

Rush: How to make being uncool the coolest fucking shit

Santana: The world needs more Santana

Scandal: There’s something really funny about The Warrior being my brother’s “song” with his girlfriend

Scorpions: Was Wind Of Change written by the CIA? Only the spotify podcast I got an ad for once could say

Seger, Bob: A different variety of Eric Clapton (frankly a better variety, but that’s just me)

Simple Minds: we ALL forgot about you

Skid Row: Sebastian Bach is prettier than all of us

Soundgarden: music that makes you feel like you dunked your head underwater

Springsteen, Bruce: my arch-nemesis. Maybe someday, he’ll find out about it

Squeeze: according to my friends, the stupidest band name ever, but they’re theatre kids, so you know

Squier, Billy: If he can make it through 1984 alive, you can make it through whatever bad day you’re having

Stealers Wheel: Yet another band who I always mistake for George Harrison

Steely Dan: my house’s nickname for the Robber in Settlers Of Catan

Steppenwolf: Either makes me think of Jay & Silent Bob, Jack Nicholson, or that time I had to cut 6lbs of onions

Steve Miller Band: when you’re in the right mood, they slap hard

Stewart, Rod: my soundtrack to summer 2015

Stills, Stephen: Love The One You’re With Is Catchy, but the lyrics are questionable

Stone Temple Pilots: the only band to write a song about goo you smear on yourself

Stray Cats: an obscene amount of merch is available for them

Styx: Supernatural would have ruined them for me too if I hadn’t been into them previously.

Supertramp: I hunted for Breakfast In America for two years and it was worth every hunt

Sweet: I will never understand my two-month obsession with Ballroom Blitz when I was 15, but it was legit all I listened to

Talking Heads: you may find yourself in a pizza hut. And you may find yourself in a taco bell. And you may find yourself at the combination pizza hut and taco bell. And you may ask yourself; ‘how did I get here?’

Temple Of The Dog: I keep confusing them for Nazareth

Ten Years After: somehow still relevant

Tesla: not the car or the dude

The Beatles: Evokes a lot of opinions from people. Mine is that I love them

The Clash: I showed my sister the ‘Lock The Taskbar’ vine ONCE and it still kills her

The Doors: evokes teenage terror from deep within my soul

The Guess Who: Canada’s answer to confusing question-themed band names

The Kinks: kinky

The Police: wrote the theme of 2020 and everyone somehow forgot it was about a teacher resisting becoming a pedophile

The Ramones: playing all of their songs in a row wouldn’t take more than 2 hours

The Romantics: you don’t think you know them, but if you’ve seen Shrek 2, you have

The Who: If someone can explain Tommy to me, I’d be glad to hear it

The Zombies: I think they happened because of the 60s

Thin Lizzy: Could the boys maybe leave town?

Thorogood, George: blues, but make it modern

Toto: the most memed song behind All Star

Townshend, Pete: just makes me think of the end of Mr. Deeds

T-Rex: Mark Bolan is an icon

Triumph: The no-name brand of Rush

Tubes: like the yogurt

Twisted Sister: they did a christmas album and my mom does NOT hate it

U2: U2 Movers; we move in mysterious ways

Van Halen: RIP Eddie

Van Morrison: honestly, who’s named Van?

Vaughn, Stevie Ray: Steamy Ray Vaughn

Walsh, Joe: The Smoker You Drink The Player You Get

War: Foghat, but even groovier

Whitesnake: the most successful band to be named after a penis

Wright, Gary: the 90s thanks him for writing the song every movie used for the “guy sees cute girl and it’s love at first sight” scene

Yes: To Be Continued

Young, Neil: The best part of CSNY

Zevon, Warren: the album cover of Excitable Boy makes me deeply uncomfortable for reasons I don’t understand

ZZ Top: has been the same three guys since 1969. Lineup unchanged.

3 Doors Down: They feel a little modern to be on a classic rock station, but whatever

38 Special: Why 38?

#I made this instead of doing homework #Classic Rock #Meme

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scp-10000 · 3 years

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Coal Fighting Hermits

(Keep in mind this is all just personas. Myself and The Hermits aren’t fighting in real life. Also, my minesona’s a half dragon, half eldritch horror who solves most of her problems by bitting, scratching, and slapping them with her bone tail.) I’m joining this quick trend started by @shadeswift99. Let’s go. Time for a bored and combative lizard to fight some Hermits.

Bdubs: Yeah he’s a feral man like two seconds from snapping, and he has 3 knives and a machete under his shirt. I’ve made worse decisions. 10/10 Would fight. 5/10 I’m sure it’d be even enough for it to be fun.

Cubfan: You see, I wouldn’t be able to fight him. I’d lunge at him, and using his Vex Magic, he’d rob me, and teleport far away before I even lay a claw on him; doesn’t even matter if I only have 5 cool bones and 50 shiny rocks, bastard’d steal’um to spite me and bail. 10/10 Would fight to get all my stuff back. 1/10 I’m not getting my stuff back.

DocM: Draconic Eldritch Abomination vs Buff Creeper Cyborg Man with a Rocket Launcher Arm. That sounds like a dumb action movie, and I live for it. I’d only fight Doc if someone was recording it, cause even if I lose, it’d be entertaining as all hell. 10/10 Would fight. 1/10 I sure as hell ain’t winning, lets be real.

Etho: Cryptid who likes dropping anvils. Sounds like a fun fight. 8/10 Would fight if bored. 2/10 Probably would only win if Etho got bored mid fight and just left.

False: The Queen of Hearts, Heads, and Body Parts. I’d definitely fight her if I wanna die, but knowing my luck, the univers’ll have her spare me as punishment for all my sins. 10/10 Would totally die. 6/10 I’d be disappointed if I live.

Grian: Now, half the fandom’s like “gRiAn HaS sHoRt FeRaL eNeRgY,” which I’ll admit he probably does; problem is I’m 5′7, so that ain’t gonna help him. Now Grian is also a good ambusher, which probably would help him because I’m shite at finding targets I’ve lost track of. If I lose track of Grian in this fight, he’d totally be able to ambush me. 6/10 It’s not one I really think’d be fun. 4/10 Eh.

Hypno: No, I will not fight the vibing man. 1/10 Not unless I need this for the main quest or something. 5/10 I’m guessing it’d probably be even.

Impusle: No, I’m not going after the vibing totem man either. 1/10 Dude probably has a hotbar full of totems. 6/10 Again, totems.

Iskall: For some odd reason, I get the feeling if I attack Iskall, it’d eventually turn into him seeing how bad a fighter I truly am, and he’ll end up trying to teach me. 10/10 I’m not passing up an opportunity to be taught. 4/10 Even at my best, I’d still have a lot to learn.

Jevin: Bitting, scratching and tail slapping’d probably split him into an army of smaller, angry Jevins, and I’m not dealing with that. 1/10 No. 1/10 No.

Joe: I wouldn’t fight this man, but I would bring him to Cleo in case she wanted to take his knee caps. 10/10 What if Cleo needs his kneecaps? 10/10 I’mm’a get Cleo those kneecaps.

Keralis: My claws are too curved to just poke him in the eyes. Besides, it’d probably be more fun to watch him struggle and squirm like he did when Etho tried to kill him. 8/10 Would fight. 5/10 Losing would probably be me getting bored and leaving Papa K alone.

Mumbo: Unlike half the fandom, I don’t see Mumbo as a lanky boy. He also does Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and I don’t, so that’s gonna be a fight. Granted, Mumbo’s a giant, non-confrontational dork, so that makes my choice harder. 5/10 Would I even fight him? 5/10 I’d probably stand a chance.

Rendog: Yeah, my brain doesn’t short circuit when I run into horny. At best it’s acknowledged when I’m not set on murder. 7/10 I might ask him to square up if I’m bored. 5/10 Might be an even fight.

Scar: Same situation as Cub, but not at the same time? Let me explain. There’s a chance he’ll cast the same spell as Cub, but there’s also a chance he’ll forget to, and I can get a swipe on him before...well have yall seen that video where a dog attacks a kid on a bike, and then the cat comes out to mess up the dog? Imagine I’m the dog, Scar’s the kid, and Jellie’s the cat, and you’ll know how well that fight’ll go. 0/10 No. 0/10 No.

Stress: This girl can carry massive pumpkins halfway across the server on one strength potion. I’d fight her just to see how far she can yeet me. 10/10 For the yeet. 4/10 If she doesn’t yeet me, it might not go well.

Tango: This man builds massive minigames, and wrangles ravagers. I more feel like I’d get trapped in a moving maze to fight ravagers for like half an hour before he gets bored watching me struggle. 9/10 It’d be a fun way to spend an afternoon. 4/10 Doesn’t mean I’m good at fighting ravagers without full iron armor.

TFC: I respect the man of the earth too much to fight him. 1/10 No. 1/10 No.

Vintage Beef: The blood on his apron does not override his vibing man vibe. 1/10 No. 5/10 If I must, I feel like I’d have a fair shot.

Wels: He’d probaby come up with some sick diss track lyrics on the fly... and then have to teach me how to rap battle after I say “I don’t get it.” 1/10 I don’t think this’d even qualify as a fight. 3/10 I feel like my poetry skills are lacking.

xB: Another vibe man. No, I shall not fight him. 1/10 No. 5/10 I probably could do decent if I had to.

Xisuma: I’d attack him thinking since he’s a bee, one sting and he’s done, only for him to use his formal Doom Guy Training:tm: to body slam me so hard I’m banned from the server. 10/10 For the meme. 1/10 I’m not avoiding that body slam.

Zedaph: You all are thinking “Funny contraption man can’t fight,” when from what I remember of @lyraeon and I talking about the subject once is in PvP, Zed’ll run at you swinging and screaming. To me, this is a more fair assessment of Zed’s abilities, and is what I’m going off of when thinking about if I’d fight him. Thought, I probably won’t attack if he’s working on something. 5/10 Right now, he’s the only vibing man I might actually consider fighting? 5/10 Might be an even fight.

Zombie Cleo: She won’t fight me. Instead she’ll convince me to let her set up an army of living armor stands to fight. I would not attack her cause she’d give me more stuff to fight when I’m bored and combative. 1/10 No, I’m not fighting my supplyer. 1/10 If she decided to sick an army of armor stands on me, I’d probably lose.

#hermitcraft

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melbee · 4 years

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Electric Love

CHAPTER 5

David Lee Roth Fanfiction

Oh see, don't ever set me free

I only wanna be by your side

Girl, you really got me now

You got me so I can't sleep at night

- you really got me

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

Saying goodbye to Holly must’ve been one of the most hardest things I had to do in my life. I knew that we would see each other soon, as we promised to meet up whenever we both were available, but I realized that she wouldn’t be here for everything, and somehow I would have to survive by myself.

Well not totally by myself...but you get the point. Tears were shed, hugs, a few knocks on the head and final waves as I stood near the window that overlooked the front parking lot of the apartment, as the red Ford drove away into the sun which had begun its descent.

“You know I have these beautiful bay windows over on the other side, since the sun sets over to the west. It’s much prettier.” I heard Lewis voice out as I turned around to look at him smiling, motioning with his hands toward the other room.

I smiled, “Sure, I would love to see it.” I walked over to the windows and peaked at the sun that was steadily falling with every passing second, and realized Lewis was right. It was beautiful. I imagined those right off the beach in Malibu had the joy of watching it in full every evening, and sighed in contentment.

“It’s nice isn’t it? The light beginning to fade.” Lewis said as I felt his presence as he too made his way over to the windows and leaned in a daze.

“Yes, it reminds me of Arizona, those sunsets weren’t so bad..” I said laughing as I envisioned the many times as kids me and Holly would drive out into the desert during the weekends.

“Yes, but doesn’t it get dreadfully cold when it’s finally dark out?” Lewis asked facing me.

I shrugged as I looked over at him, “Well yes, doesn’t it get cold in California?”

Lewis plastered a sinful grin as he giggled, “Honey, quite the opposite..”

I smiled and laughed, as I stood from my position making my way over to the couch. “Oh?”

Lewis got up as well as he stood walking over and begun looking at nearby fabrics left forgotten on the counter, “Well perhaps in Bel air or some shit, but here? In Hollywood? Baby it gets hot.”

A confused looked etched my face, “What do you mean?”

Lewis rolled his eyes and sighed, “Chica, you’ll figure it out one day..”

I gave him a weird smile as I shrugged. While I had no clue what he meant by hot, I had a sneaking suspicion he wasn’t talking about the weather. It was something else. I felt a chill run down my back at the thought.

“That’s besides the point... I was hoping we could go over some things, projects and sorts. I’ve got quite a few but a recent one I just picked up. I’ve been looking at designs, it’s hard to tell which would look good.” Lewis said as he sighed. I made my way over to him as I fingered the skills and the velvets, and even the.. spandex?

“Spandex?” I said as I grabbed the piece of black and tight fabric, as I heard a giggle come from my left.

“Yes, that was a bit of a client’s request. Rockstars these days...” he said as he looked at it thoughtfully.

“Oh rockstars? I heard you dealt with musicians. Who are you working with now?” I said.

His eyes bugged as his jaw dropped before slapping his face, “LORD! I completely forgot to tell you that over the phone didn’t I? Gosh I’m so stupid!”

I laughed as I shook my head.

He sprung to life suddenly, as he walked out of the room, much to my confusion. I was close to following him until he came back with stacks of what looked like paper cutouts from magazines and posters.

I grazed my hand over the first one. A beautiful tall man, with leggings that hugged every inch of his curves, a plethora of chest hair and a Jean cutout jacket that seemed to sparkle even from the picture. He had fluffy blond hair, and a look that I’m sure would make any girl drop to their knees.

It suddenly dawned on me who this was. “Are you working for..”

“Van Halen? Yes! Isn’t it wonderful. Trust me I was shocked when I got a call they wanted me to make some clothes. I mean.. come on..” Lewis gasped as he started flipping over the different pictures of the guys.

I laughed as we stared at all the different members of the band, Eddie, His Brother and what I assumed was the bass player stood in many pictures. Every time we passed by ones with the blonde haired guy, I couldn’t help but get confused at who that was.

I know I wasn’t exactly the most literate music fan, I couldn’t help my tastes were a bit old fashioned.

“So the blond guy...he’s..” I started to say as Lewis gave me a wild look.

“David Lee Roth? Do you not know who he is?” Lewis gasped standing back in horror.

I looked sheepish as I scratched my arm, “I know a few songs by them.. I haven’t really gotten a chance to listen to them fully.”

“Oh god.. that’s it! Impromptu music sesh’.” Lewis said as he made his way over to a cabinet bringing out an old record player, and opened a cabinet adjacent which was stocked with vinyls of all types. He looked through, as I made my way over to him, before he gasped and grabbed the first album to come out.

“Van Halen 1. No bullshit just straight up rock n roll.” Lewis said as he put the track on as a familiar song came on that I’m sure I heard on the radio at some point.

He beckoned me to sit down on the couch as he grabbed the pile of pictures of Van Halen, nodding his head back and forth to the music. I smiled finally getting to understand the meaning behind the meolodies. Some of the songs were quiet sad, Jamie’s Cryin? It irked me they could play such powerful and rocking music, and the lyrics were much deeper then what they appeared to be.

When Eruption started playing I couldn’t help but gasp, at the sounds that were emitted from the record player. The guitar wailed with power and sophistication. “Wow!” I said to Lewis, who just smiled at my reaction.

“You should here him play it in concert. Holy fuck, Eddie is the cutest little thing with that impish grin, he just plays that shit like he’s washing his car.” He said as he sighed looking at the pictures once more.

“Oh I’m sure..” I said imagining myself at the concert. “Do they play to big crowds?”

Lewis gave me a dumbfounded look before nodding his head vigorously, “Huge! Every single one of them are controlled by those guys, I’m telling you..”

“So what outfits are you making for them?” I asked as Lewis set the pictures down, as he got up.

“All for their shows mostly, specifically for the one coming-“ He paused with dramatic horror as his eyes bugged. “Chica!!! Their show is coming up!”

I gasped realizing he was right, remembering the billboard I had drove past on our way here. I feared the worst at his reaction. Did he not have all the outfits ready?

“Oh don’t worry. I’ve got most of them finished, I’m just finishing the bedazzled sequins on David’s chaps, and Michael’s cowboy pants.” He said as he grabbed my hand pulling me off the couch and into a separate room, that reminded me of a seamstresses room.

“Do you know hand stitching? Or bejewelling by chance?” Lewis asked as he unzipped a hanging bag and grabbed a pair of pants that by my astonishing surprise, were assless.

I smiled and laughed, nodding my head yes. As I rubbed a finger down the material “Yes, I love bejewelling! I always got As in that class in college.”

He grinned grabbing a container of crystals, and some sort of machine that imprinted them into the material. “Well great this bottom half still needs finishing. Also bear in mind that these are swarovski crystals, and I’d love if none of them get lost somewhere.”

My eyes widened as I nodded my head. He quickly showed me how to use the machine, before he made his way over to a pair of cowboy pants, and grabbed slashes of leather. “I’ve got to finish these up. Don’t worry we’ll have it all done quickly. I’ve got my friend Mari from the front desk she used to help me out, but she’s going to be help us on Saturday to load everything up to the venue.”

“Oh I met her at the front desk. She’s very nice!” I said laughing as I begun placing the crystals on the pant carefully.

“Oh she’s wonderful, poor thing won’t go to the venues anymore though...” Lewis said sighing.

“Oh really, why?” I asked. Curious if it had any thing to do with her bold words when she warned me about rockstars earlier.

“Poor thing, her heart got broken.” He said clicking his tongue, as I heard the sound of snips and tears as he worked.

“Oh.. By who?” I said.

He suddenly stopped as he gave me a look, “David.. He.. well I guess you could say they had a falling out. He wasn’t really interested in her, but she was completely in love.. I think he kissed her and well..”

“Dissed her?” I said as I frowned going back to my work.

“Yes, something like that. He played with her emotions a lot and well, she’s never been able to see him again.” Lewis said as he sighed.

“Is that why she was so stand offish about your clientele?” I asked

I looked over to see Lewis nodding, “She wanted to quit helping me out, but I told her she needed to find a way to balance her life again and so this is the only solution. That’s why I needed a new assistant. I can’t just pay someone to walk the outfits to the car and leave.”

I nodded in understanding, but what confused me, is why Mari would be so heartbroken she couldn’t even do her job properly. What exactly did that guy do to her? I hadn’t even met him yet, and he already sounded like an asshole.

“David’s very.. peculiar. He’s very eccentric, and sometimes that makes him a little insensitive at times. However, I think he means well for the most part. It’s understandable, ever since his claim to fame he would be more egotistical.” Lewis said as he continue to cut through the pieces of leather and sowed them onto the jeans.

I nodded my head in understanding, but I still didn’t believe that was a good enough excuse. Was he that clueless enough to not be careful with manipulating someone’s emotions? Something didn’t sit right with me, but I chose to ignore it until I got a better judgment.

“So what are the other guys like?” I asked Lewis, slightly humming to myself as I felt an onslaught of exhaustion hit my face as I realized that the road trip had definitely taken a toll on my body.

“Oh they’re lovely..wild... crazy as ever for sure..but a lot of them have different personalities.” Lewis said as I turned to him.

“Oh yeah?” I smiled.

Lewis laughed, “Yes, well Michael Anthony—he’s the bass player by the way— he’s a lot more calmer then the rest and very sweet, but so funny. He’s got a great smile.”

“Both the Van Halen brothers while they might be similar, they are polar opposites in a lot of ways. Eddie’s a bit more quieter, but is so cute and charming. Al is a bit wild, but he’s funny, and has a good time.” Lewis said.

“So you know them on a personal level?” I asked, realizing how familiar Lewis spoke when referring to Van Halen, and I had a hinting suspicion he was closer to them then what he put on.

Lewis laughed nodding his head, before shrugging. “I got the call almost a year ago that they wanted costumes, and I guess they liked my work so I continued. I’ve been to lots of there shows over the year, and their parties.”

I gasped, wondering how fun hanging out with celebrities would be. “Did you get to travel?”

Lewis smiled and nodded. “The best part was probably getting to go to Japan for a couple days, and a night in Sweden. I’m telling you they must ditch all the ugly people to Norway, because EVERYBODY was so attractive.”

I laughed, trying my best to picture the scene in my head.

We continued on for hours until I was just about finished, and my eyes were starting to fall from exhaustion.

Lewis noticed my tiredness and smacked his arm much to my humor. “Jeez, I’m a totally idiot! I totally got sidetracked! You must be dead tired right now.” He had finished his pants and was now cleaning up. he stood up and walked over to me signaling for me to get up.

I stood up smiling and laughing, “Are you sure I can’t help finish this last bit? I’m almost done.” I said holding my hand to my mouth as a yawn passed my lips.

Lewis frowned making a tsking sound, before grabbing my hand and leading me to my room. He turned on the light, and pointed to an adjacent door. “There is a bathroom in there, and a closet to the left side of the wall. Help yourself with a shower if you want, just don’t be in there too long. The neighbors upstairs run an indoor ‘kiddie’ pool, or some shit..”

I smiled suddenly getting the urge to hug him, so I did. Patting his back thoughtfully, before pulling away. “Thank you Lewis, truly.”

Lewis smiled, before grabbing my cheeks and squeezing them. “That’s what friends are for.”

I smiled, as he walked away before standing at the doorway giving me a happy smile. “I’m so glad you’re here, Rosie.”

I laughed, “I am too.”

“I want you to know that no matter what happens or where you go in life, I have full belief that you will excel in life. I see the passion for designing in you. It’s a wonderful thing.”

I blushed tucking my hand over my ears. Lewis beamed tapping the door softly with his hand, his rings making a solid thumping sound. “Goodnight. We will be up early tomorrow, I’ve got some of Van Halen’s tour designers coming to get the clothes ready for fitting, before the show. Mari will be here on the following Saturday.”

I nodded my head sighing loudly. “Sounds exciting. Goodnight.” With that Lewis closed the door silently, leaving me to breathlessly plop my body onto the bed, a slight creaking noise resonating through the quiet atmosphere.

I held my head in my hands, before looking up in exasperation. “Well I guess I’m fucking doing this thing.”

With that I prepared myself for the day ahead, that I had no doubt would be as eventful as they come.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

When morning came, I was ill-prepared from what would meet me through the front door.

Sure, I assumed that Lewis had a few designers he worked with and maybe they would bring in a rack of clothes, possibly some bags to help transfer them, but I had no idea the size of what the operation really was going to be.

So when a flank of men and women combined dressed in suits, and skirts came in with clothing racks of various styles of pants, shirts, and even scarfs I knew I had not prepared myself enough.

Lewis smiled brightly as the people came in, as I watched as a smaller figured girl holding a box of fabrics, with pretty brown hair struggle to keep up with the pace. I sprinted over to her, grabbing onto the other side to help her pick it up.

“Here I let me help you.” I said with a huff as I picked it up, much more effortlessly then I anticipated.

“Ooh!” I heard a cry come from the other side as we walked backwards over to a table and set the box down. I walked backwards to see the girl raise her eyebrows questioningly at me.

I smiled as I wipe my slightly sweaty palms on the side of my jeans as I raised an arm for her to shake. I could see hesitance in her eyes before she gave me a small smile and shook it.

“Hi, I’m Rose.” I said laughing as I stood back awkwardly. I couldn’t tell if she liked me or not from the odd look on her face as she stared.

She suddenly gulped as she nodded her head quietly. “I’m Annie.”

I smiled nodding my head. “Nice to meet you Annie. So, I assume you work with all these people?”

She shrugged shoving her hands into her pockets, “Yes well, it’s a way to meet ends. I love fashion.”

I laughed and smiled, but couldn’t help but turn at her odd comment. If she loved it so well, why did she say it as if she would rather be doing something else?

Her eyes glazed over, as I sucked in my cheeks at the awkward silence.

“Oh there you are!” Lewis said as she grabbed my shoulder, and looked over at Annie.

As if she was a brand new person, Annie suddenly smiled so brightly. “Hey Lewis!”

He laughed grabbing her into a hug, as she giggled wrapping her arms around him. I couldn’t help but frown slightly at her sudden bold and excited nature around him. Did she not like me? Why was she so cold and hesitant, but suddenly a new person around Lewis?

They pulled away from the hug as Lewis noticed my odd look, but decided not to comment on it. “Well it seems you guys met.”

I smiled looking over at Annie who had quieted down to only a small smile. The original glint in her eyes slightly coming back as she set her gaze back on me.

I laughed trying to cheer up the awkwardness, “Yes we have. Wow! I didn’t know this was all going to be as formal as it was!” I said trying to change the subject.

Lewis shrugged as he surveyed the busy room. “Believe me it wasn’t always like this, but we’ve all built up ourselves a lot over the past year. We’re closer then ever.”

I smiled, as he motioned for me to follow him into the room we were in last night working on the outfits. “So as you know this is my work room. We do most of the making here, and we also organize the clothing for before and after the fittings.”

I nodded my heads as the people from before stop there chattering as they all looked at me with curious expressions.

Lewis laughed, “Okay guys don’t bite. This is Rosie, my new assistant. She’ll be helping with all our preparations.”

The room immeasurably lifted as they all came walking over, a few girls laughing as they pulled me into a hug. Complimenting my hair and whispering how pretty I was.

One of the guys with a bright smile walked over embracing me tightly. “Lewis, you’ve got yourself a keeper.” He winked.

Lewis rolled his eyes trapping me in a playful arm lock, “Channing, she isn’t up for sale.”

His eyebrows quirked, “Really? So my man finally likes the front hol-“

Lewis turned tomato red, as he slipped his hand over Channing’s mouth. He laughed putting his hands up in mock surrender, as Lewis still recovering from his blush as he shook his head.

I giggled in understanding. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to jump to conclusions, but many men in the fashion world tended to be, a bit blatant in their...preferences? I had a slinking suspicion that Lewis was the same way.

They all backed away, as I saw Annie who had been behind us quietly make her way over to the girls as they all began surveying the work.

“Wow! These chaps look great!” One woman said as she grazed her finger down the side of the seams.

Lewis winked at me, grabbing my hand and brought me over to the table where the clothes lay. “Well I happened to know a girl.”

The woman smiled, and looked at me in surprise. “The cross-stiching at the ends are impeccable! The crystals are placed wonderfully.”

I laughed as I shrugged, “It isn’t too complicated.”

She rolled her eyes playfully, “You’ve got in you girl. Id love to see some full ensembles.”

The other girl with red pigtails that reminded me of Holly giggled, “Yes, those outfits would for sure sell some more tickets to the concert.”

They all giggled in response except for Annie who only smiled, as her eyes glazed over in a thoughtful look.

“David’s going to love them. I just know it.” The woman said as she grabbed a hanger and clips from the rack as they all begun ensembling the outfits into bags and secured them.

“Oh he’s going to just love her, Molls” The One with red hair, said as she winked at me. “Have you met the boys yet?” Her eyes glinting with curiosity.

I simply shook my head, crossing my hand over my chest. “No, I haven’t gotten the chance. However, I’ve heard a few of the stories.”

“Yeah well, trust me they aren’t as available as you think they are.” I heard the quiet voice of Annie ring out as she stepped away from the rack.

Oh. I had wondered what her hesitancy was. Did she see me as some threat? I didn’t have the slightest idea as to why, though. I had no intention of even getting to know them, rather then actually..

Molly sighed sympathetically patting Annie’s back. “Babe, I just don’t think-“

“I don’t really want to talk about my personal life. I’ll bring some of the stuff down to the car.” Annie said with a tight lipped smile as she walked away.

The red head, noticed the tension and smiled, “Rockstars will surely be the end of all of us.”She walked over to me grabbing my shoulders. “I’m Liz by the way.”

I nodded, “Nice to meet you, Liz.” I looked over to the woman who had a small frown over her face. “You too Molly.”

She snapped out of her haze and gave me a wide smile. “Anytime, girl. We’ll be seeing each other soon.”

We heard thundering footsteps come into the room, as I looked over recognizing that it was Lewis, who must’ve slipped out the back while we are all talking. This time his signature smile was gone, as a deep perturbed looked etched his face.

“What’s wrong?” Molly said as she gave Lewis a concerned look.

“I just got off the phone with Noel. They’re all hungover as hell, right now. Apparently they all pissed somebody off at some bar.”

Liz snorted, “okay, that’s their regular Tuesday. What about it?”

Lewis sighed as he shook his head, “No, it was someone important I guess in the industry. Anyways, they’re kind of off the rails a bit still, at least David is. They had to put him in a..” Lewis then seemed to be battling his smile, as he bit a lip.

Molly gave him a humorous glance. “What?”

Lewis began laughing, “They had to put David in a straight jacket.”

I couldn’t help but smile along with the rest of group as we all snorted and giggled, at the idea of a rockstar being put in a straight jacket for being so off the walls.

I hadn’t even met David, and he already seemed like quite a character. What irked me even more is that I felt as if I did know him. I acted as if I was battling whether he was a weird guy, or just a gigantic asshole. I didn’t know what I would do when I met him. However, I knew it wouldn’t be a boring conversation.

I pictured the man in the magazine articles, his hair wild, like a mane of a lion. He had such a lustful look in many of his doctored, professional looks. However, I couldn’t help but admire the ones with him performing. That wild look, the giant smile, something told me deep down that, that was the real David. Under all the glitz and glamour, there was just a man going after one big dream.

I finally looked back at the people to realize only Channing, Liz, and Lewis had stayed in the room. I watched them all converse animatedly as Channing brought out a notebook and was hastily writing things down. They all seemed to be conversing about the outfits, as they all waved their hands widely with deep expressions.

I smiled realizing I had finally found my people. True artists. I walked over to them, as they wrapped up their conversation.

Channing smiled embracing me in a hug, “It was nice meeting you, Rose. I’m already counting the days till our next partnership.” He said as I kissed my hand, with a suave look in his eyes.

“Okay Romeo, back off.” Liz said as she laughed grabbing me in a hug. “We’ll be seeing each other in a couple days.”

“Really?” I said as I looked over at Lewis. He smiled nodding his head.

Lewis gave me a knowing look as he winked. “Chica, we’re seeing Van Halen. And I’ve got backstage passes.”

They all began to laugh as the day seemed to close with that single thought.

I was going to meet Van Halen.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

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deadpooly · 5 years

Text

2019 Iron Man Bingo!

“Tony! I swear to any god out there if you do that I will kick your annoying ass out into the outer rings of Saturn!” people out in the hall could hear a pissed off James Rupert Rhodes once again yelling at Tony Stark. Probably saving the kid’s life from what it sounds like. But they didn't know that Tony was hovering his finger over a switch that would set off his newest project on magnetic fields, and most likely cause a problem.

He has been working on it for a month or so with Rhodey and they have been studying the strength of different magnetic fields.

“Not gonna lie, that sounds fun.” Tony said dropping his hand by his side “but,” he continued. “This might give off a strong enough field that we can get some results. The estimated Tesla count is pretty high for a fun garage band project. Hey Rhodey-bear?” Tony looked at some papers flipping through and resting his hand on the switch.

“What? Tony no! This room isn't big or secure enough for that!” Rhodey said rushing towards Tony and maneuvering around tables and other projects.

“Come on Rhodey, results!” he replied and inched his hand right as Rhodey reached him and shoved him away from the machine.

“It’s not secure!” Rhodey scolded Tony, who pulled himself from Rhodey’s grip and started walking back to the machine. This is a really small lab that we have to share with other people and we can't have you blowing stu- TONY!” Rhodey yelled as Tony pushed the switch and nothing happened.

“What? It should have given off at least a-”

A loud crackled interrupted Rhodey and the machine that was in the chamber had an unhealthy amount of purple energy erupt from it.

A small forceful explosion set off in the lab, it wasn't very collateral but it was loud. Multiple metal projects fell off their stands, from being affected from the contained magnetic pulse. Also, the machine was totally demolished and there were small sparks of purple energy calming down.

“Yess!” Tony laughed as he brushed himself off, he ran over to a computer and a couple devices. He started mumbling numbers and writing things down.

Rhodey straightened up and marched straight over to Tony slapping him over the back of the head, satisfied with the small thump it made. Tony just flinched and rubbed the back of his head.

“What was that for?”

“Are you an idiot?” Rhodey yelled at Tony who just shrugged his shoulders.

“I mean maybe-” Tony just started mumbling going off track.

“Someone could have gotten hurt! Look at the projects you destroyed!” he continued to scold Tony who was scratching the back of his head. “Come on man, you broke Connor’s thing he was working on.” he groaned in sympathy for the guy. Tony once again just ignored that.

“We are going to be in deep shit! I don't know how you are not kicked out of this school yet. With all of these dumbass dipshittery things you pull!” Tony just waved him off, grabbing a random rag and wiping off some dust on a random part.

“I don't know either? Like i'm obviously trying to get out of this school.” Tony said sarcastically. “The pulse also hit 1,200 Teslas by the way.” he finished turning back to his desk with a smug smile on his face.

“Wait what?” Rhodey stopped.

“Yep.”

“I guess that's cool?”

“It reached about 500 more than we originally expected! That's something good we can report.” Tony said.

“Yeah, if we get to report at all.” Rhodey said as the door opened behind him.

“Now, I wouldn't suppose that either of you would tell me what happened here.” a deep male voice asked from behind the two. “Heard a big commotion in here, i'm not surprised that you are involved Mr. Stark.” he finished, tapping his foot impatiently on the floor.

“Um, sorry?” Tony said scratching the back of his head. Rhodey just looked at him slapped him in the arm and gave a deep frustrated sigh.

“Sorry, Mr. Durran.” Rhodey said stepping forward. “We were working on our project when it went off, the eruption was contained and none of us were injured.” he immediately told the professor.

“I see.” the professor analyzed the room with a brow raised. “And the unfortunate projects you have damaged?” Tony snorted and leaned back on the table, his arms holding him up from behind.

“Those were damaged before I had anything to do with them.” he joked with an eye roll and ignored his professors unamused look.

“Well, I hope you intend on apologizing to whoever's projects you have broken, they will also be given an extension,” Mr. Durran told the two students and Tony mumbled a “whatever” and started scratching at his wrist. “Well, clean up I guess. Accidents happen and I believe your little stunt did achieve something at least, this room better be impeccable before you leave.” and the teacher went to his desk, grabbed a few papers and left.

“Oh man, you are so lucky we didn't get suspended or anything, otherwise I would have murdered you.” Rhodey turned to Tony and held his hands up mimicking a strangling motion.

“Relax Honeybear, he’s a cool guy and all we did was science.” Tony grinned and went back to checking numbers on a screen. “You need to kick back, don't be so uptight.”

“My uptight-ness is what saves your dumbass a lot so you need it.” Rhodey replied and Tony just called him a “buzzkill” in return.

After that they stayed in the room setting “damaged” projects back on tables and just making things look nice, “They aren't even damaged it just a small magnetic pulse on them it did nothing but knock it off the table” Tony defended to Rhodey. Since the small explosion happened in a chamber nothing was really damaged, it was just a dampened magnetic force. They cleaned some tables and everything looked as if nothing touched it.

It didn't take long to clean everything up and do some small fixes on the machine. Tony doing something stupid is almost an everyday occurrence and this wasn't much of a difference from other times.

“Well technically, we didn't touch anything.” Tony told Rhodey later when they left the room.

“Tony, one of these days you're gonna pay for all the shit you pull.” laughed as they made their way to their next classes. “If I wasn't there Mr. Durran totally would have given you something I know you wouldn't have enjoyed listening to.”

“I wouldn't have enjoyed it because I would have to listen to it,” Tony shoved Rhodey. “You know listening isn't my style.”

“Can't argue with that, besides, you are like the only person with a sense of style in the school.” Rhodey sarcastically said returning Tony’s shove, but Tony bumped into the wall this time.

“Come on, you can't diss my band shirts and jeans with the occasional long sleeve! It’s a classic look platypus!” Tony defended as they rounded a corner and continued walking to their class.

#ironmanbingo3000 #ironmanbingo2019 #my first fill #of many #i have a bunch written and just need to be edited lol #idk when i will get to that tho yet #tony stark #rhodey rhodes #mit #young tony #young rhodey #<3000 #enwrites #elevatorsnotworthywrites #jadewrites #rhodeytony #tonyrhodey #ironhusbands

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sorrybaescenarios · 6 years

Text

EXO reaction: writing a song about them after you break up

♛ Xiumin ♛:

“Now you want somebody to cure the lonely nights. You wish you had somebody, that could come and make it right, but -, I ain't somebody with a lot of sympathy.”

Xiumin froze in his place as the lyrics hit him like a hard, thick wall of stone. Everything started coming down on him when all he wanted to do is clean the house, grab something to eat and keep on living with his life without you there. As sad as it made him feel to hear those words come from you, on the radio, it also madden him deeply. It was too much for him to bare. You broke up recently and he was struggling to get back on the track, to get used to the feeling, while you were nicely writing songs about him. Even though he changed the radio post and moved on with his doings, he couldn’t shake off the lyrics from his head and how it affected him.

♛ Suho ♛:

“I just need you to disappear, that’s all I need, just go to the girls you secretly flirted with.”

Junmyeon was talking to some higher ups when he first heard your song, some trainees feeling the need to blast it out for the whole company to hear. Silence fell upon everyone at the loud sound, the lyrics making the leader widen his eyes in horror. Everyone seemed to know about your recent break up so when they all turned to Junmyeon with a questioning look, your accusations putting him in a bad light, he only cleared his throat and gave out a fake smile, continuing with his presentation. He’s going to settle everything with you after, like an adult. You’ll pay for this sis, nobody ruins Kim Junmyeon’s image.

♛ Lay ♛:

“It doesn’t matter anyways, when this night is over I’ll forget you again and live like that for a while.”

Yixing was in the car when your new song came on, everyone going silent as they turned towards him, waiting for his reaction. He ignored all of their stares and stayed silent, listening carefully to your lyrics, being genuinely curious as to what you’ve been up too. What he wasn’t expecting though was a sad song that made his heart stop for a second. He knew it was about him, your break up was very messy and he knew he hurt you, he never forgot, the thoughts of your happy times hunting him every night. He didn’t say anything even as the song came to an end, he just stayed there, the pain in his chest too much to handle.

♛ Baekhyun ♛:

“Oh stupid, think about it, are you that slow? You will regret losing me who shines.”

To say Baekhyun was mad when you came on stage and started to sing your new song was a very big understatement. He was fuming. He watched you from his seat as you started dissing him for everyone to hear, growing angrier by the second which scared the rest of the members who were doing everything in their power to calm him down. They actually had to pull him back in his seat and hold him there when your diss won song of the year, making smoke come out of Baekhyun’s ears. How could they give a trophy to a song that made a fool out of him? What the hell?!

♛ Chen ♛:

“Do you know how I’m doing these days? Do you know that I’m becoming more ruined as I look at you?“

Jongdae tried to keep a straight face as he continued to watch your performance, not wanting to appear affected by the sad words that you sang and cause a scene at an award show. You looked beautiful as always on that stage, gorgeous even, the only thing missing being your radiant smile, it’s absence making his heart drop. You two broke up a couple of months ago and while Jongdae suffered thinking you moved on, this song proved he was very wrong, slapping him in the face with all of your hurt and sadness. He would definitely go and talk to you after your performance.

♛ Chanyeol ♛:

“She wears a ring, came through without it, You really think she stay true? I doubt it.”

Chanyeol flipped. He was in his studio, trying to somehow get inspiration to finish the rap he was currently writing when your song came next on spotify and he just let it. He let it play thinking that no way it could affect him, but as soon as you started subtly dissing him, Chanyeol started to have second thoughts about his decision. He understood you two didn’t finish on such good terms, but dissing him got this boi on fire and all he could think about it ‘hell no you ain’t doing this to me’. He immediately picked up the pen and started a fresh new song as a response to your dissing, inspiration suddenly back at his side. He wasn’t let you off that easily.

♛ D.O ♛:

“And I never gave myself to another the way I gave it to you. You don't even recognize the ways you hurt me, do you?”

He pretended that he didn’t care, that he was okay. He kept a straight face while everyone around him gave a reaction as you sung the heartbreaking lyrics of your newest single. KyungSoo knew immediately he’s the reason behind the song and it hurt. It hurt so much to see the person he considered the most important on stage, with a mic on and singing about him. About how heartbroken he made you feel. But he was just like you. Unfortunately all he could do is keep quiet and try his hardest to not not let it affect him in public.

♛ Kai ♛:

“Nothing here, no one talking, knowing it's too late, but sometimes it can get so hard pretending it's OK.”

Kai was present when you promoted at one music show, staying backstage away from the rest of the guys, and boldly watching the TV showing your performance. As he kept looking at you and listening to your song he realized it’s actually about your breakup from a few months ago and it made him uneasy, it made him...sad. His heart was breaking once again and if it wasn’t for Suho to come and get him, he would have ended breaking down.

♛ Sehun ♛:

“We were always together, we became alike, I can’t even imagine forgetting you.”

Baekhyun was the one who showed Sehun your new song, curious as to how the baby of the group would react to something that was clearly written about him. No emotion could be seen on his face as he proceeded to watch the music video, a sad melody filling the room which even made the older man tear up slightly. As the video came to an end and Baek wiped his tears dramatically, Sehun stood up suddenly and stormed off, phone in hand, ready to give you a call. He didn't want to show or admit it but your song really messed him up, having no idea he caused you so much pain. This made him realize how much he actually needed you in his life and how far he was willing to go to get you back.

#exo #exo reactions #exo scenarios #exo sehun #exo baekhyun #exo chanyeol #exo chen #exo xiumin #exo suho #exo kai #exo do #exo lay

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apebrain-apera · 5 years

Text

HH: WOLF Pentalogy P1

**There are tl;dr sections explaining things after each major part image in case this is too long for you**

Ok so most Tyler, The Creator fans should already know about the entire WOLF trilogy conspiracy, basically a theory about how Tyler’s first three albums Bastard, Goblin and Wolf, released in that order, all fit into a larger narrative that’s could be quite possibly one of the largest multi-faceted music story line I’ve ever witnessed. Now that we got the fanboying out of the way, this will mainly focus on two parts - the original WOLF trilogy, and secondly where his latest two projects fit into them.

PART 1 : THE ORIGINAL TRILOGY

Now although the albums come in their own chronological order it would be BASTARD > GOBLIN > WOLF. But of course it isn’t that easy so we’re gonna have to rearrange them to fit the narrative better. So our new order is WOLF > BASTARD > GOBLIN.

Wolf

So Wolf begins with the song Wolf. ikr? Anyhow so basically in this track Tyler meets Sam, who’s basically been at camp Flog Gnaw for a good bit of time. We know that Tyler’s been sent to camp because of the songs Answer and Lone, which talk about Tyler not being able to contact his dad and losing his grandmother respectively. We see similar situations with the therapy sessions of Bastard and the asylum sessions in Goblin. Back to the story Sam obviously does not want to make new friend with Tyler and basically tells him to leave him alone. So here comes the whole love triangle going on with Sam, Tyler and Sam’s girlfriend - Salem. Basically in the song Awkward Sam and Salem recount how their love bloomed while Slater talks about literally nothing other than Salem riding on the handlebars of Sam’s bike. That is literally all there is to this song. Meanwhile Tyler is struggling with the whole dad not being there situation we discussed earlier and also a song,Colossus, that does better and explaining the original definition of stanning better than the man who made the term in the first place. So during the whole partyisntover three part track thingy Tyler starts hitting on Salem and starts sneak dissing Sam to her on the Bimmer portion of the song, which is when Sam goes on a drug run. Oh yeah i forgot to mention that SAM SELLS DRUGS, but it’s pretty hard to miss when theres an entire song, 48, about how he sells it. Sam comes back and is obviously livid when some random guy voiced by Lionel tells him that Tyler and Salem are at the lake, a lake that is referenced TWICE with the songs Analog(Goblin) and Analog 2(OF VOL.2). So the description of IFHY says that Tyler performs Sam’s song, and Sam performs Tyler’s song. This references how the song is directed towards the new relationship between Salem and Tyler, while Yonkers(Goblin) sings about shoving things in, what we can assume to be Sam’s, girl. We find out in IFHY as well that Sam is at camp because of some seriously messed up things at home, which is basically Sam going crazy and killing a bunch of people on Pigs. On Rusty, Tyler calls on Earl and Domo to roll up on Sam’s squad, and the climax of that is Trashwang, when both squads go to war. So that’s basically all of Wolf, now its time for Bastard YAY!

tl;dr - Basically Tyler and Sam had some heavy beef and Tyler has daddy issues and his grandma died. Sam is all edgy and killed a bunch of people. Also Tyler stole Sam’s girl and threatened to kill Sam if he saw him again and gets placed in therapy after getting caught beating his meat by Clancy. Not because he threatened to kill someone. BUT BECAUSE HE GOT CAUGHT JERKIN IT.

Bastard

Ok kids now its time for more text! Aren’t we all excited? Ok so Bastard starts when Tyler is basically sent to therapy for all that weird death threat stuff and basically starts his therapy with Dr. TC which looks a lot like Tyler Creator. But maybe it’s a coincidence. So Tyler talks about this girl who he calls “Sarah” even though he explicitly says it’s not her real name. Sarah = Salem is probably the most creative thing this character could come up with. There’s even a song called Sarah where Tyler talks about how he can never get over her and that she “tried to play him like a dummy”. So of course when Tyler talks about being abandoned and played he’s gonna talk about his dad leaving him on Seven (which might i add slaps like a motherfucker). Next is Pigs Fly where a guy talks about how he sells dope, had a sociopathic episode and fighting his own mental demons. Sounds a lot like our friendly neighborhood Sam doesn’t it? Even the name references his little episode. Anyway most of the other stuff doesn’t add very much to this narrative but the end sets up another deep dive into therapy for Tyler, as he gets so upset about his father situation that he threatens to shoot him if he ever meets him too. Well if you made death threats after the happy happy camp AND after therapy there’s only one place you can go right? OH OF COURSE! A MENTAL ASYLUM! DUH! WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF THAT?

tl;dr - Tyler goes to therapy for threatening to kill Sam, talks about how much he hates Salem now apparently which leads to more father abandonment issues. Sam looks remorseful for the whole murdering thing and Tyler gets even more edgy when he says he’ll kill his dad too.

Goblin

So we finally made it to the final part of the trilogy, Nilbog. Its just goblin spelled backwards but apparently its an easter egg in the whole OF TAPE music videos. So at the end of Bastard Dr. TC tells Tyler that he would never kill anyone. Which obviously leads to the albums title track where Tyler literally goes on a 6 minute rant about how everybody should just fuck off. Just a little angel ain’t he? On the track Her(another slapper) Tyler starts referencing Awkward, which seems a little weird since its a song from Sam’s perspective. He talks about a girl who’s name is still his password, which somehow means that there’s a possibility that Sam is one of Tyler’s multiple alter ego’s, like Ace or Tron Cat. Sandwitches where Sam is out here straight throwing shots at Tyler’s squad. Analog as we’ve mentioned before talks about when Tyler and Salem were at the lake. Summer never has to end with Tyler, but it of course does because he doesn’t control time like a four dimensional being(nice callback to previous HH) and Salem is stolen back by Tyler’s alter ego Sam. This man is literally getting his girl stolen by himself. On BSD Tyler, Jasper and Taco, just do the whole ignorant hood rat shit and of COURSE that shit SLAPS. Then he kills both of them. On Windows, TC decides to get Tyler’s friends together for an intervention, but for some reason Jasper and Taco are missing. Tyler then proceeds to kill everyone except TC and Earl, who wasn’t there because of the whole Samoa incident(which is a nice job of tying it to reality). Goblin ends with tyler trying to escape the asylum, but TC stops him by revealing that he is also one of Tyler’s personalities. to quote “See Tyler, I’m your conscience. I’m Tron Cat, I’m Ace, I’m Wolf Haley, I’m... (Me).” So this just means that our boy Tyler is bat shit crazy.

tl;dr Tyler literally loses his mind, and so does Sam since he’s just an alter ego. Tron Cat and Ace start to take over Tyler’s mind which turns into him killing all his friends bar Earl. So now Tyler wants to find a way to stop this madness, a way to...... KTA(man im killing it with these puns). So what’s the best way to get rid of em? Make sure that Sam is Dead.

Sam is Dead

This is the final ending act of the original trilogy, which was released in 2012 along with the OF TAPE VOL.2 mixtape. This means that if we add it to the timeline we would get BASTARD > GOBLIN > SAM IS DEAD > WOLF. This is a really big thing going on and it scares me. it’s too much theory. send help. Now the name of the song is Sam is Dead which means we can assume that the three Tyler’s that are killed in this video are Ace, Tron Cat, and Wolf Haley. So the next part will explain what happens after these three are killed. Part two will be here shortly so stay tuned

#HyperactiveHypotheticals

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earwaxinggibbous · 6 years

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Eminem - Worst to Best

So I was watching theneedledrop and thinking I could do this too. That’s all the prefacing you’re gonna get.

I know it’s hard to believe I can judge Eminem from an objective standpoint considering I’m such a big fan that I ranked Kamikaze as my favorite hit song of 2018 (my actual favorite song was probably When You Die by MGMT or Stop Smoking by Car Seat Headrest for the record) but I am able, physically, to have negative opinions even about the rap god himself.

My only rule is that this only includes his full-length studio albums. Infinite won’t be here due to my lack of knowledge regarding it, but everything else is fair game. This will be heavily opinion-based.

Let’s go and start from the worst!

9. Revival (2017)

Initially I was gonna put Encore below this one. After all, in my opinion, there’s nothing egregiously awful about Revival in my mind. It just sort of existed to me, like that dead roach that stayed in my high school’s gym for over a month before disappearing without a word about it.

It wasn’t until I gave a few of the tracks a re-listen that I realized Revival has nothing going for it. This is Em’s sellout album, the one where he collabs with Beyonce, Ed Sheeran and goddamn X Ambassadors in the vague hopes that it’d get him a hit. Songs that don’t bother having clever writing because all they need to do is slap a semi-important pop singer on the hook.

It’s easily Em’s most ballsless album. In a universe where Kill You and Same Song & Dance exist, there is no need for Framed, Em’s almost saddening attempt to return to his Slim Shady roots even though, let’s be honest, the years of Shady are long behind us.

I’m not saying I need Em yelling slurs and talking about murder every five seconds, I just want him to be, for lack of a better word, the most authentic version of himself he can be. And this really isn’t it to me. No amount of politics or wordplay can hide that this is a sham of what an Eminem album should sound like. I don’t need diss tracks, or songs about serial killing, I just want him to say what he wants and not hold back.

Everything about the album is weak and tired. Every song melds into one another, without thought or purpose, only broken up by the celebrity hooks that define them. It’s the blackest mark on Em’s discography, and easily his worst album to date. Not even worth sneezing at.

8. Encore (2004)

I guess we shouldn’t let Em do whatever he wants...

Encore has the opposite problem that Revival does, and it’s a problem I empathize with. Encore is essentially word vomit in album form. It’s the musical equivalent of Jack Kerouac��s spontaneous prose, loud and incoherent and kind of gross. It’s what happens when ambition goes unchecked, and Em just leans a little too far into what the media says about him.

This was also deep in the throes of Em’s drug abuse problem, and it shows. This album feels like a bad drug trip, sludgy and gross and heavy, in a way that makes it hard to move your arms and legs. With these absolutely god-awful sung choruses on songs like My First Single, Eminem dares you to make less sense than him as he rambles like a crazy person through song after song, only taking breaks from his half-attempts at comedy on tracks like Mosh, Like Toy Soldiers and Mockingbird, which try to be serious. But it’s hard to be serious when you’re essentially getting choked in a soup of valium and regret.

I don’t hate Encore like I do Revival, because in some ways I can understand where it comes from. It’s trying to do the same sort of thing its predecessors did, with silly songs and serious ones. But the funny songs are so weird and frankly gross that it quashes any attempt of seriousness. It’s like Eminem thought the only way to make his songs better were to take what his detractors hated about him and turn it up to 11. Songs like My First Single are complete nonsense complete with gut-churning sound effects and a shitty beat, whereas Just Lose It, a song I’m ashamed to admit I enjoy, fills itself with baseless offensiveness and weird reference humor to function. And that was the big hit single off of this album.

Really I think Just Lose It was the best way to sell this album. What says Encore more than a song insisting that Eminem diddles little boys? FACK would’ve been in place on this album, which is not a compliment.

7. Recovery (2010)

Recovery shares a lot of problems with Revival, a lot of radio-bait songs featuring pop artists that have no business being within ten feet of Eminem. But I’ll admit its singles were far superior to that of Revival. No Love was far superior to anything Revival spat out.

I just kinda don’t care about this album. Other than how Love The Way You Lie was permanently ingrained in the cultural consciousness around 2010, I have very few thoughts about it. I remember hearing most of the singles when I was in elementary school, and they were all just kinda fine. Space Bound was okay (other than that coked up line about love being ‘evil’ spelt backwards) and Not Afraid was sincerely underwhelming considering what it was going for.

It’d been diminishing returns for Em for years, so I’m not shocked he needed some time to get back on his feet. But there’s just not much to say about Recovery. I feel like Em was a lot prouder of it than anyone else.

6. Kamikaze (2018)

At some level, I feel like Kamikaze set itself up to fail. And it did pretty well in spite of that.

The album’s main selling point was that it was dissing everyone. Shady’s gonna name names, I remember hearing, as this album dropped right the fuck out of nowhere in the late summer of 2018. Diss track drama has never really been for me, since oftentimes it pits artists I like against one another over petty bullshit. And hearing that Em slammed people simply for disliking Revival only made me more nervous about what Kamikaze’s outcome would look like.

I’m glad to say it was not nearly as bad as I was expecting.

I’m sort of on the fence about this album. While I think it is punchy, and pretty fun lyrics-wise, it definitely doesn’t hold a candle to any of his older stuff. It doesn’t even really hold up against MMLP2. It’s less that I enjoy this album, and more that I enjoy the possibility of Eminem managing to pick himself up after Revival and move into the new age while still being himself.

Easily the worst moment on this album is Eminem calling Tyler the Creator the f-slur and even implying he’s pretending to be gay, which he has since apologized for. However, the scariest thing to me that the line represents is the possibility that Eminem’s personality is too anachronistic. That in an era of young-adult trap rappers with very experimental homemade beats, there’s no longer room for a famous, albeit angry man in his 40′s being backed by a studio. It’s the years of Soundcloud, where anyone can be a rapper, and someone as old and frankly polarizing as Eminem may never truly have the limelight again.

Em’s style has simply fallen behind the times and he will never be content with updating himself, because that isn’t who he is. And while I love that about him, I think it might speak disaster for his career.

I like the songs though.

5. The Marshall Mathers LP 2 (2013)

Now we’re getting into the good shit. The Marshall Mathers LP 2 starts off with a bang, the first song being Bad Guy, a direct sequel to Stan and an incredibly powerful sequel at that. Eminem asks questions about his fame, his identity, and most notably, he fucking gets murdered at the beginning of this album.

MMLP2 strips off all but one skit. No Paul Rosenberg cameo on this one. This was him getting serious after the relative failure of Encore and Relapse. This was, frankly, what Recovery should’ve sound like. With Berzerk being a fun sort of party hit, Rap God is what really got him back on the map. The song asserts his lyrical dominance. It is a brag track, and it earns that right.

Despite it being of incredibly high quality, this is nowhere near Em’s best work, which speaks highly for his track record. The fact that something this well-made is comparatively mediocre when put next to the top four is incredible to me. This album is more of a revival than Revival was. It’s Eminem reaching out of the dirt after being buried and yelling “Hey, I’m not dead yet!” It’s the hearbeat running through a comatose body as they return to consciousness.

But when it comes down to it, I love what this album represents to me more than its content. Aside from Berzerk, Bad Guy and Rap God, none of the songs really stand out either way. It’s all good, of course, but none of it can match up to his older work. Regardless, this album means a lot to me on a spiritual level. Whenever I listen to this I feel like a proud parent, and Em is my son who just completely crushed his elementary school talent show.

It’s a good feeling.

4. Relapse (2009)

At this point it was sort of like picking my favorite child. My number one is obvious, but deciding how to order these three was trouble.

People will probably argue with me saying that Relapse is one of Em’s best, but fuck that. This album is severely underrated among the fanbase, and is an incredibly powerful listen. This album is an auditory representation of rock bottom, in the best way possible.

This is one of the only albums to really define a split between Marshall and Slim Shady, with Slim being a deep-voiced demon and Marshall being a fucked-up middle-aged man who just came staggering out of a rehab center. The way the characters play off of one another is beautiful, Slim trying to manipulate Marshall into his ways and wiles. This also easily has the most horrorcore-type sound and content out of any Eminem album, with Slim occasionally playing the role of a serial killer, such as on 3 am or one of the standout tracks, Same Song & Dance. Insane tells a story possibly regarding Slim’s father, or maybe representative of something else entirely.

One of my few issues with this album, aside from We Made You of all things being one of the singles, is that one of the best tracks is only on the deluxe edition. My Darling ties off the Slim and Marshall story in a nice little bow, plus Careful What You Wish For sweeping up all the themes and putting them in one place.

This album is beautiful, it’s cinematic in a way. It’s deep and powerful and incredibly, incredibly scary, with Em at his lowest point in his life and career. Sadly, it was not well-received critically, which I think is a shame. Clearly they weren’t seeing what I see.

3. The Eminem Show (2002)

Screw Revival, this is easily Em’s most politically powerful album yet. I listened to this whole thing on a boombox I got at Best Buy for 20 dollars and I felt like I had fucking transcended.

This album pulls out all the stops, immediately starting out on White America, a song so goddamn strong that every time little me heard it on the radio I immediately got down and lost my shit. I didn’t even understand what it was about, all I knew was that it was big and important. And it is.

While his first two big albums tried to be weird and threatening, The Eminem Show just wanted to be big, and talk about big things. Eminem fearlessly tears into heavily-charged concepts in White America, Say Goodbye Hollywood and Square Dance. Then on the flipside he aims the gun at himself on tracks like My Dad’s Gone Crazy, Cleanin’ Out My Closet and even Hailie’s Song. It’s a gut-punch of an album, this is where Eminem is truly fearless.

I’ll also say I feel this album is a little bit more accessible, weirdly enough, than Em’s earlier stuff. It’s much less crude and aggressive, but still carries his trademark style. It’s got the skits, he yells a lot still, but the topics are easier to swallow than his earlier albums. I’d say it’s a good entry-level Eminem album if you’re threatened by rape jokes and Em yelling the f-slur constantly. And unlike what Teens of Denial was for Car Seat Headrest, I feel like The Eminem Show manages to be that entry-level album without completely castrating Eminem’s lyrical content.

But even longtime fans can gain enjoyment from this album and how loud and proud it is, how fearless Eminem really is on this album. This one, more than anything, is the unfiltered Marshall Mathers experience. No filters, no jokes, just him and his daughter and Dr. Dre.

But easily the best part of this album is the DVD extras thing where you get a free episode of the Slim Shady Show. Fuck yeah.

2. The Slim Shady LP (1999)

The Slim Shady LP was Eminem’s first really successful work. It was also the first thing he ever put on a CD. Yeah, Infinite was on cassette only. And this album is fucking great. It’s a perfect debut for Eminem. It’s got his first big hit, My Name Is, and a myriad of other great tracks. It’s just good late 90′s rap, with fun beats and interesting lyrics. As much as I love SSLP, I don’t really like talking about it because... yeah, it’s good, I’m just never sure what else to say.

And that might make it sound like I like it less than The Eminem Show, but no, that’s not it. As much as I think political Em is great, I’ll forever prefer nasty rat boy Em any day. This is the Em that inspires me the most, the grody, crude one that reminds me of myself. Best tracks include 97 Bonnie and Clyde, Bad Meets Evil and of course My Name Is. This is also the only album where Ken Kaniff is played by Aristotle. There’s your fun fact for the day.

1. The Marshall Mathers LP (2000)

FUCK everyone else, I respect YOU!

The Marshall Mathers LP is a defining rap album. It’s lyrical perfection, the hooks are god-tier, and it is without contest the best Eminem album of all time. I doubt he’ll ever top this, and if he does it’ll probably break space-time.

MMLP ticks all the boxes an Eminem album usually should. It’s quirky, it’s comedic, it’s dark, it’s angry, it’s violent, it’s everything I could want and more. But beyond that, it’s the thing that really proved what Eminem can do. He can tell stories, he can do lyrics, he can flow, he has good beats, he can murder his ex-girlfriend, he can get his own songs censored on the uncensored version of his album, he can do it all.

The songs on this just put me in a good mood. Even though they’re horrible, and I don’t mean they’re bad songs. The content is absolutely fucked, this album is not for the faint of heart. But it makes me feel represented, not for being gay, trans, mentally ill or short, but for being a fucked-up weirdo who lived a fucked-up life and just wants to scream and lose his shit. More than anything, this feels like an album that’s there for me, for better or for worse.

The standouts on this album in my opinion are the two “named” tracks, Kim and Stan. These tracks are incredibly disturbing, but they both mean a lot to me and are incredibly written and acted. The Real Slim Shady is still an amazing single with an awesome, hopping beat. I’m Back is incredibly solid, Criminal is cleverly contradictory, every track on this album is great without any misses. If there were enough words in the English language to describe how much I love this album, I’d probably use all of them.

This album couldn’t exist today. If this came out today, it’d probably be thrown to the wayside for a myriad of reasons. It’s too late 90′s, it’s too dark, it’s “problematic”, we have like 500 white rappers now, but for the record: Anyone who writes this kind of music today owes it to Eminem, ESPECIALLY all of the white rappers who insist they’re better than him. (Looking at you, MGK.) Even if he’s not doing that great now, even if you don’t like him, it’d be foolish to not acknowledge what MMLP did for rap. And not only was it influential, but it still holds up to this very day.

So there you have it. All of Eminem’s full albums (besides Infinite oopsies) listed from worst to best. Have any differing opinions? Leave a reply. Just be polite, you filthy animal.

#worst to best #eminem #music review #music criticism #panda posts

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deadcactuswalking · 4 years

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 17/10/2020 (Headie One, D-Block Europe)

You know, I kind of expected a bigger impact from D-Block Europe given that this is their debut studio album. I guess maybe people are as sick of these guys as I am; the mixtapes they released got tracks higher on the chart than this, and that was without some of the big name features they had. Regardless, we still have nine songs to cover here, so... this week’s #1 is still “Mood” by 24kGoldn and iann dior, and welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

Last week had two album bombs – or at least whatever you can call “album bombs” on a chart that tries its hardest to stop those from happening – so naturally there are quite a few drop-outs and returning entries from the UK Top 75. Two of each from 21 Savage with Metro Boomin and Bryson Tiller are gone from last week, with the only songs from both albums still on the chart being the ones with a “(feat. Drake)” in the title. Typical. None of the BLACKPINK songs from last week have stayed either. Other than those six, we also have a handful of notable drop-outs like “What’s Love Got to Do with It” by Kygo and Tina Turner, “Hallucinate” by Dua Lipa and “POPSTAR” by DJ Khaled and Drake, which probably just felt the impact of dumb UK chart rules about streaming. All of these are pretty decent songs – the first two could have peaked a lot higher – so what in the returning entries is coming to replace them? Well, we have “Wishing Well” by the late Juice WRLD back at #74 and a theme of long-running hip-hop tracks like “Dinner Guest” by AJ Tracey and MoStack back at #72 and “I Dunno” by Dutchavelli featuring Tion Wayne and Stormzy at #68, all of which peaked in the top 20. The biggest gain this week was for Fleetwood Mac’s “Dreams” which is in the top 40 this week and predicted to be even higher in the weeks to come, especially in the US. We usually send 40-year-old songs to #1 but the States seem to have caught up with that too. The biggest fall this week was for the debut last week, “Outta Time” by Bryson Tiller featuring Drake, plummeting from #24 to #58, which is understandable; I mean the only reason it got that high in the first place was because of Drake. Now, onto the new arrivals.

NEW ARRIVALS

#63 – “BLM” – OFB (Bandokay and Double Lz) featuring Abra Cadabra

Produced by N2theA

Like many people, fans and artists alike, due to the recent events in America and across the world, I’ve gained a renewed interest in protest music, particularly songs about systematic racism and police brutality. Many artists, including some of the biggest out right now like Lil Baby, have made songs about this recently but really this is not an isolated incident or chain of events. Rappers, musicians and activists have discussed these issues for years and the fact that the general public is finally latching onto some of it makes me hopeful. Seriously though, if you’re looking for a great song from a couple years back protesting against the same topic, “Don’t Don’t Do It!” by N.E.R.D. featuring Kendrick Lamar is right there. OFB is a drill collective from Tottenham, and the group actually contains some genuinely massive names, like Headie One and RV, but here, we just have Bandokay and Double Lz, as well as affiliate Abra Cadabra on the chorus. There’s also a sample of Coldplay here, which actually works as a melancholy piano component of this drill beat, even if it feels like a bizarre choice at first glance. I don’t really need to talk to you about the beat, right? In a song like this, content is what matters and, yeah, it makes a pretty solid case for itself sticking up to inhumane police officers, even if some of the lyrics do feel oddly surface level at times, particularly Abra Cadabra and Double Lz, even though he does have personal anecdotes to tell, but not as much as Bandokay on the first verse where he does get pretty damn in-depth.

There’s no evidence on S but 21 years got slapped to his chest / Yo, I just want P like Diddy, police on my back ‘cah I look like Pops

Bandokay is the son of the late Mark Duggan, a 29-year-old Black man who was unlawfully shot and killed by police in Tottenham in 2011, sparking protests and riots across Britain. This feels particularly profound but also unnerving from Bandokay because he sees himself as next in line for this treatment, talking about how it still haunts him and when he finds out about a friend of his getting life in prison, he’s stressed because he feels like it could very well be him locked up in there for reasons equally unjustified or clearly at the fault of minority disenfranchisement, particularly for young Black men who are driven to the streets because of it. Both Bandokay and Abra Cadabra discuss how gang culture is seen as an excuse for police officers to shoot, with the chorus digging into how because of the violence depicted in Black art due to segregation and societal issues still present in the modern world, that gives them the justification for assault and murder of innocent Black lives. Double Lz goes a bit off-topic here but I can’t say that recall of a phone conversation he had with his friend in jail doesn’t hit hard given the context, especially in a time where we feel more distant than ever with fellow humans. I don’t think it’s as good as “The Bigger Picture” but these guys definitely get my respect for this. Check it out.

#55 – “Proud” – D-Block Europe

Produced by Mind the Gap

And now for almost the exact opposite of social commentary, serious topics and melancholy production: D-Block Europe, although this isn’t actually D-Block Europe, it’s half of the band. Young Adz has three solo songs on this stupidly long album and Dirtbike LB has two, one of which has a feature so I’m pretty sure we all know who’s the Swae Lee in this British Rae Sremmurd... especially since Young Adz’s solo song debuted this high. The song is actually quite different from their standard fare at least in terms of lyrical content, with Adz going into the gang culture and its effect on his mental health, particularly his relationship and drug addiction. His off-beat nasal crooning here is actually kind of charming under these levels of Auto-Tune and a fast-paced trap beat that actually works a lot once it kicks in a minute and a half in. The second verse, particularly, is pretty excellent, where he dedicates the verse to his daughter, who he hopes will not follow in his footsteps of “lifestyles” but also promises her wealth and a continued faith in Islam. The way he talks about how he wants his daughter to succeed even if he dies and later on his companionship with Dirtbike LB is... kind of beautiful, honestly, and does make me look past the mixing issues and... interesting delivery from Young Adz. The uncredited whispery vocals from RAYE on the outro definitely add to the feel of the track and, yeah, I like this quite a lot more than I expected but it still doesn’t make me want to check out that album.

#53 – “I Miss U” – Jax Jones and Au/Ra

Produced by Jax Jones, Mark Ralph, Cass Lowe, Alex Tepper and Tom Demac

Hey, remember Au/Ra? Well, I didn’t either until I checked her Spotify page and saw she was behind that “Panic Room” song that I loved from last year, specifically the remix from CamelPhat – seriously, I’d like to see more on the charts from those guys too. I’m not sure Jax Jones will be able to live up to the brilliantly-constructed ominous future house of that song, but this is supposed to be a silly love or break-up song so I expect a cute, vaguely tropical radio-friendly dance-pop tune with some 90s deep house influence thrown in there, like most of Jax’s stuff ends up being. Anyone else kind of sick of this stuff? I know it gets plays in the clubs which are still in the UK and much of Europe, using this type of dance music, but this robotic draining of the emotion from generic break-up tunes sang by indie-adjacent women over a four-on-the-floor beat is something I’ve heard hundreds of times before. I know this has been a British staple for decades but the new-ish style of vocal drops and generally tired production is growing pretty stale for me at least. It can work when it does, and Au/Ra isn’t a bad fit for this slick, beeping production – this is a pretty okay song all things considered – but there’s not any warmth or quality in this type of stuff anymore, let alone variation. This song is fine but I do hope it kind of underperforms for Jax just to set a precedent that this is exhausting and honestly kind of a cheap ploy for plays at this point. Is that too harsh? Probably, but after two and a half years of seeing these types of songs every other week, it gets on your nerves.

#49 – “Not a Pop Song” – Little Mix

Produced by Robin Oliver Fred, Tayla Parx and MNEK, peaked at #37 in Ireland

Does that mean I don’t have to review it? I want to like this girl group, especially after they ditched the manufactured pop image from Syco and signed to another label that I assume does not treat him as horrifically, but I feel like the music hasn’t changed or gotten any more interesting at all. In fact, this song serves as kind of a diss track to Simon Cowell, and not in any way a subtle one at that. “I don’t do what Simon says”? I mean, don’t you guys also have a talent show you executive-produced, and is airing currently on the BBC? Sigh, well, is the song any good? Well, it tries a little bit more with that guitar loop but not with the clunky trap beat, the harmonised triplet flows in the pre-chorus that sound awkward, and most importantly, the lyrics, which are otherwise fine in how they represent the music industry, a corrupt and unfriendly business, but not in a way that feels like it’s revealing any secrets or anything that really hits. Especially the chorus, where that “I don’t give a what” chant just undermines the whole message. Shouldn’t the point be that now you CAN swear on your songs? I don’t know, this is just worthless but admittedly a lot more listenable than their last record so I’ll give it to them there, even if it is out of a clear effort to be as inoffensive as possible.

#46 – “Flowers” – Chip

Produced by Dready

So, in Chip’s pretty garbage verse on “Waze” earlier this year, he took some shots at an underground artist that many assumed were shots at Stormzy, who commented on this with some subliminals on “I Dunno”. Naturally, in response to this light-hearted beef from two former good friends all based on misinterpretation, Stormzy pulled up to the guy’s house, with only Chip’s brother and sister being home. His sister even felt the need to pull out a kitchen knife to defend herself, so, yeah, I have no sympathy for Stormzy here. Unless this is based on personal drama that we don’t know of, he really unnecessarily escalated this petty dispute. Hence, Chip has two diss tracks here, this is the first of them; the other didn’t chart. To quote Chip’s manager, Ashley Rae, who is also name-dropped in the song: Stormzy pulled up unannounced to Chip’s building with three other people. The building was secure with gates and an intercom system. He didn’t knock. He came in and was posted in the car park screaming for Chip to come outside. After being told to leave twice as Chip wasn’t home, he refused and made his way to Chip’s apartment on the top floor where family were inside and it got heated. He caused a commotion so the neighbours called the police. This diss track seems to share my view of the situation; Chip even briefly brings up the political climate as he talks about how Stormzy should have expected the police to be called – after all, when people in Essex see black men shouting outside a building, regardless of their innocence, the authorities seem to get involved. In this diss track, Chip calls back to other disses he’s made, notes his disappointment in Stormzy collaborating with Ed Sheeran when he’s the one who escalated to potential violence – you’d think he’d be smarter not to risk his image – and sending some personal shots at his break-up with Maya Jama, which actually made me chuckle, particularly when he says that a throwaway track on a collaborative album seems to have incited a bigger reaction than that long-term relationship coming to an end. He goes even deeper into how he thinks Stormzy’s activism is hypocritical if he wants to incite black-on-black violence by pulling up to Chip’s house, and references the late 2Pac and Pop Smoke and... okay, he just ravages Stormzy here, and it helps that this beat is menacing, even if I don’t like Chip’s delivery or voice, as I never have. “Killer MC”, the other diss track, is a lot vaguer and with a pretty chaotic beat which Chip can barely flow on, so yeah, I’m glad this one charted. Man, a lot of aggressive, lyrically-focused songs today, huh?

#34 – “Destiny” – D-Block Europe

Produced by Jony Beats

And just like that, they appear. This is our second and last song from that D-Block Europe album debuting this week, and it’s only high because of a video anyway – that and the fact it’s the first on the album. Otherwise, this is typical D-Block Europe fare, albeit this time with a hilarious but absolutely pointless 30-second acoustic guitar intro that just consists of the guys whispering “Destined” with as much reverb as possible. Dirtbike LB is actually on the hook this time, making it even more lethargic. Young Adz is filling in empty space with ad-libs again, including his signature “SKI!”, and in his first verse here, I genuinely laughed out loud after that booming “bow-bow-bow-bow” vocal interlude coming out of nowhere. It honestly caught me off-guard. I kinda like Young Adz’s pretty energetic flow here though, and he definitely plays with the boring trap beat in a way that is pretty funny. He feels the need to say “Happy G-day” to a person in the booth with him, which shows that he’s freestyling at least some of this stuff, which is kind of impressive. He “endorses” new straps, which is just funny wording to me, as is when he says 9 Goddy “had” Norwich, like he just owned the city – although, as a fellow East Midlander, I kind of appreciate the shout out. My favourite part in the verse is probably his attempt at 2012 hashtag-rap, where he says “half a mil’, mortgage”, but the beat cuts out when he mutters a wimpy “rurr” ad-lib, and that almost forgives his weedy delivery and gross Auto-Tune. I think “Rurr, mortgage” makes up for the chorus, “Break a brick like Tetris”. Honestly, I get why people prefer Adz’s energy and funny content because the only thing to laugh at with Dirtbike LB’s bleak, almost depressing lyrics about materialism, meaningless sex and drug addiction, is how he phrases everything in a manner that is uniquely middle-class and polite, especially in this verse, and how he just seems to be accepting the dark topics he talks about in his verse with a shrug of his shoulders. It’s kind of concerning, I mean, I don’t like the music but I hope he’s okay. In conclusion, the song’s fine and honestly I kind of love the first verse but that chorus is dull and really it’s a pretty poorly-mixed trap cut. To be honest, if there’s more of this energy from Adz on the album, I might just check it out. The guy’s growing on me recently.

#29 – “Cool with Me” – Dutchavelli and M1llionz

Produced by The Fanatix

Apparently this guy is Stefflon Don’s brother, and now that she has been pretty quiet recently, I guess it’s time for Dutchavelli to step into the limelight, and he’s bringing fellow Birmingham rapper M1llions with him for a song with not much of a chorus to speak of. Instead, Dutchavelli and M1llionz trade verses and bars for three minutes over a pretty banging drill beat, with an eerie choral sample throughout and honestly pretty great verses from the two of them here. Dutchavelli sounds really aggressive here and I love the yelling in the ad-libs, even if it adds to some questionable vocal mixing throughout. M1llionz’s casual, meandering flow and cadence works really well in contrast, even if really nothing is said here other than gunplay and flexing. The beat feels like it never properly drops at all, and it just slides out abruptly by the end, but if this is an intro track to an upcoming album with a following track that drops us straight into it, I could see this working. As is, well, I’ve not got much to say about it but this is decent.

Also, I’d like to point out Dutch’s Wikipedia page, particularly the “in popular culture” section.

Dutchavelli has gained a reputation for being a hard man. This paired with his large stature has lead to a proliferation of memes relating to this within popular culture such as 'When Dutchavelli goes to a club, he asks the bouncer for ID'.

God, I love Wikipedia.

#24 – “Parlez-Vouz Anglais” – Headie One featuring Aitch

Produced by Al Hug and Ambezza

Okay, so our last two songs are both from Headie One and his overly long, 20+ track album he released last week, Edna. Do you see a trend with these British rap artists and debut albums? To be fair, I am more interested in this album, and I’ll probably listen to it after writing this. The feature list looks pretty good – I mean, it’s got Drake, Kenny Beats, Skepta and ironically, Young Adz on a song that did NOT chart this week – and I really loved “Both” from last year, so it’s probably worth checking out at least some of the songs. This song, however, was not one of those I was interested in. Man, I’m so angry I come back to this show and get back-to-back weeks with high debuts from rappers featuring this pioneer of gentrified drill music. He’s already made a song romanticising French women and high fashion as well, so it’s not like this is new territory for the guy. Admittedly, I do enjoy this cute, lounge-y elevator music sample but it feels pretty drowned-out by both the bog-standard UK drill beat and awkward flows from both, who are doing a similar thing to Dutchavelli and M1llionz did in the last song we talked about, but with more repetition to fill up time and more trading bars between the two, as well as an actual chorus, which is about as dull as bricks. Both Aitch and Headie have uninteresting flows and use awkward ad-libs to disguise a clear lack of any attempts at good wordplay or content that goes any further than worryingly blatant misogyny from Aitch and constant flexing. It’s not interesting, and it’s not good either.

#11 – “Princess Cuts” – Headie One featuring Young T & Bugsey

Produced by iO and TobyShyBoy

I’m not surprised this was the track that debuted this high. Thanks to TikTok picking up “Don’t Rush”, which is a brilliant song by the way, this group isn’t just big in the UK like most of these rappers, they are genuinely global superstars for the British hip hop scene and I love that. They made Aitch’s debut onto the charts both listenable and promising on “Strike a Pose” (It’s really a feat) and are constantly bringing smooth flows and Bugsey’s really nice voice over good production. They are more than deserving of being how British hip hop is viewed worldwide, even as they got onto the Hot 100 with Headie One earlier this year. I was surprised too. So, yeah, I’m excited to hear this new collaboration between the two artists, and, surprise, surprise, it’s really good. I love the nostalgic early-mid-2000s R&B beat especially with that slick Latin guitar and pounding bass groove. I love Young T singing on the hook over really beautiful vocodered samples and funky keys in the instrumental. I love Headie’s pretty impressive and at times smooth flow in his two verses. I love how Young T & Bugsey share a sing-songy cadence in their verse. Man, I love everything about this song sonically, and content-wise, the lyrics don’t really leave that much to be desired either. Sure, it’s pretty much just towing the line between a hook-up jam and flexing, but there’s enough funny lines and convincing delivery to make this worth checking out. I also love how Headie starts the smooth, sexy hook-up jam with “My young boy got the stick like Moses with the Israelites” in his deep, gruff tone, which is just comedy gold. Headie also takes time to praise the Lord and show his limited knowledge of geography, which is either insensitive to Asians or satirical depending on how you look at it. Either way, it works and it’s funny. This is just an incredible song and I hope it sticks around. Check it out.

Conclusion

There’s actually not much here to complain about, even with D-Block Europe’s two songs here. Little Mix take the Dishonourable Mention for “Not a Pop Song” and Worst of the Week is going to Headie One for “Parlez-Vouz Anglais” featuring Aitch but I might as well balance that out by giving the guy Best of the Week for “Princess Cuts” with Young T & Bugsey. I don’t want Stormzy to pull up to my house next, so I’ll delay on giving Chip the Honourable Mention, but that is instead going to “BLM” by Bandokay, Double Lz and Abra Cadabra for simply being necessary, although I’m scared to admit Young Adz was pretty close here. I don’t know what’ll happen next week – hopefully not that new Kanye song – but here’s the top 10 for Friday’s chart:

You can follow me @cactusinthebank for occasional political Twittage and I’ll see you next week.

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onebizarrekai · 8 years

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Here we go…

I got around to analyzing the Cross x Dream comic, and, well, let’s just say I found some stuff I kinda wanted to bring attention to… whoops… sorry in advance? (I’m not trying to hurt anyone, I’m just being overly observant as usual.)

And no, this actually isn’t another rant about how Nightmare is unloved, thank goodness. This is supposed to be half comedy, so only take it half seriously. My strong reactions to things are for comedic effect, I mean. In fact, most of it is simply my reactions to the comic while I was reading it.

I don’t own any of the images used.

Update: Since the Cross x Dream comic was abruptly discontinued, this post doesn’t have much importance anymore, but I’m still going to leave this here for… historical purposes? Yeah, let’s just go with that.

So, what am I REALLY doing today?

I was reading the comic and noticed a few inconsistencies. Or… a lot of inconsistencies? Also some moments where established logic isn’t implemented or considered. This comic actually has a lot of information in it, but… some of it doesn’t make sense, and some things are changed (making it hard to know what’s actually canon or possible) so I’m here to reveal what exactly that is.

So…

Once upon a time, there was a skeleton named Cross.

What a BEAUTIFUL face.

-anyway-

He was a ‘cross’ between Sans and Chara from Xtale. Canonically, they are two separate beings in one body; to be precise, Sans absorbed Chara to keep them from being up to no good and causing trouble in the neighborhood, and this ‘fusion’ became Cross. After a while of acting like two separate entities in Sans’s body, Sans (or just Cross) decreased Chara’s control, reducing them to the state of a phantom that follows him around and is annoying. Except, Cross kind of went insane, so he started doing a bunch of stupid stuff that Chara wanted him to.

After a series of unknown events that tie into this comic known as the Cross x Dream comic, Cross ended up sealing Chara away entirely, leaving only their determination for him to use.

There we go, I found the pictures. (senpai was so proud!)

So um. Let’s jump right in. That thing about killing someone? Yeah, uh, news flash--

OOPS! That’s different… (oh well, I can understand why killing people would also work, it’s just not consistent with Underverse)

Anyway, let me get back to my other point.

Yes, determination is powerful. But, take into account that he only has half determination. In the game, determination, when not controlling time, can keep you alive in dire circumstances. But just because your HP is going back up to full or even fractioning into tiny amounts, that doesn’t mean that you aren’t DYING.

You might make a point about how your HP won’t drop any further down after that, but remember that it only applies to magic that isn’t being used by Sans (or anyone with the karma effect). Most of the attacks that I’ll mention in this are melee attacks that don’t just take off HP, but also hurt you physically and can indeed cause death if left unattended.

And you know what determination doesn’t do? The one thing that it’s never done in the game? It has never restored your health. You can die again and again, and your health can split into fractions, but it can’t restore your health. The thing that restores your health when you’re facing Asriel in the game is when you use the ‘dream’ option, and it gives you an item that restores your health. Hoping increases your defense. Determination alone can’t do anything for you in that matter. And if you’re not doing a pacifist route, you don’t have access to these health-restoring functions.

Anyway, why am I talking about this? Well, it ties into everything else.

Our good old friend Cross only has one HP. Actually, in Underverse, he only has HALF AN HP. But let’s say, just for the sake of something unexplained, he has another half of a soul now. (also I just realized that health bar makes no sense it says he only has half an HP total and the bar is still only half filled like wtf)

Man! Isn’t that a pitiful health bar. But thanks to his determination, he can last a little longer than normal.

Apparently… a lot longer?

Oof. That’s gotta hurt.

But somehow, he survived.

Eh.

You’re a little late in saying that, Dream.

But wait! Cross is somehow still alive. He got stabbed through his fricking eye and somehow recovers completely later?? Dat determination. (also his eye is blue? I thought that was a misconception and that colors aside from gold and blood colors don’t exist in his universe?)

ALSO CROSS MADE A PORTAL. He’s not supposed to be able to do that?? The whole point of Cross and Nightmare’s deal TO BEGIN WITH was that Nightmare would teleport him through AUs because he couldn’t! (Edit: Never mind, he can teleport to places he’s already been.)

Uh, Nightmare? I hope you remember that killing Dream’s gonna kill you. Geez, you gotta stop making stupid spontaneous decisions.

Whoa. I just realized how intense this escape is. But you know, it would still be more practical if Nightmare decided to attack from the side the barrier was on rather than behind them.

Anyway, I’m getting kinda distracted.

Back on track.

Dream heals Cross in Haventale, but it’s still pretty insane that he survived that.

LEARN TO BE PATIENT DREAM HE GOT IMPALED MULTIPLE TIMES JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT INJURED DOESN’T MEAN--

wait

DREAM DIDN’T PATCH UP HIS FRICKING EYE ARE YOU KIDDING ME HE CRAPPILY BANDAGED HIM EVERYWHERE ELSE AND DIDN’T FIX HIS EYE

No. (slaps self) Stay focused.

FRICK YOU HAVENTALE SANS HE’S INJURED

Oh. Frick. Okay. So yeah. WHAT THE HECKING HECK

Like I said, determination has never been able to heal?? (GASPS)

okay fine people can do whatever they want I mean who hasn’t made up some headcanon about what determination can do

Okay, so, his body healing itself was obviously caused by food, but if that’s the case, that means that people’s health bars DO indicate their body’s health and abilities and isn’t just an imaginary number (which is important later). That still doesn’t give his SINGLE HP any more strength to withstand insane attacks like--

Whoops. Here we go again. (am I the only one who laughed at this scene? Cross so had it coming)

Surprise! He survived. How’s that one HP treating you?

how is he supposed to look at himself HUH KILLER you got a fricking mirror or something well you know what I won’t be surprised if you do because you’re such a pretty boy that you probably carry one everywhere you go

But you know who else has one HP?

This guy! And after ONE stab from Nightmare, he’s dead.

Yeah, maybe this goes to show just how powerful determination is. But… you know. Cross only has HALF DETERMINATION and he’s surviving things MULTIPLE times stronger and more intensive. But fine. We’ve established that determination does crazy things… but that’s actually not the main point. You’ll see what I mean.

Oh dear! Look at this, Dream got inexplicably wrecked. Come on, couldn’t we have seen Killer beat the crap out of him so I can at least say what exactly happened?

Fine. I can speculate.

There’s no blood, so Killer didn’t use a knife yet. There still aren’t any real injuries though. Looks like he just got kicked around in the dirt a little. (I mean, he obviously still has the strength to make dramatic sad eyebrows.)

But you know? Must’ve been a lot of kicking around in the dirt. Cross can survive getting repeatedly stabbed with only one HP, but Dream?

SURPRISE

THIS SUPPOSED GUARDIAN HAS NINE HUNDRED NINETY NINE HP AND BECOMES INCAPACITATED AFTER GETTING KICKED AROUND A LITTLE.

THAT’S NINE HUNDRED NINETY EIGHT MORE HP THAN CROSS HAS. YET--

Cross can still pull of things like THIS after getting come on and slammed and welcome to the fricking jammed.

Like. Holy shenanigans. He fricking cut off Killer’s arm. Do you realize how much strength it takes to cleanly cut off someone’s fricking limb?

Look at Dream, crying like that--this is just sad. Not to be Nightmare (which I’ve kind of been throughout this entire thing) but I can’t even begin with how pathetic and awful it is to rely on someone so much weaker than you for support. Cross is injured and bleeding; he’s dying. DYING. Dream clearly isn’t hurt as badly and and there he is, crying and clinging to his knight in fluffy armor.

Then again, he just got stabbed in the foot with a knife, which is definitely painful, and Cross probably got used to shutting out pain (not to mention is probably high on adrenaline), but still. These HP numbers are starting to get me questioning this, because earlier it was established that HP really does indicate someone’s physical ability.

And remember that thing about how hopes and dreams are what boost your defense and HP? Yeah. Dream has that on TOP of having 999 HP.

Oh, and there’s one more thing that I realized.

I remember when I was ranting about how Cross started dissing Nightmare and mentioning that Dream didn’t make a mistake he didn’t have any reason to, someone told me that he was trying to get on Nightmare’s nerves on purpose. Trying to make Nightmare hate him so Dream wouldn’t get hurt. I was like, Dream would never allow that. He still loves his brother. Cross clearly doesn’t care about that, which indicates a lack of respect for Dream, especially because we thought Dream was unconscious. But that brought us back to the fact that Nightmare just ruined a ‘perfect’ AU, and Cross was caught up in the moment, which is totally understandable, but…

But, surprise surprise, Dream wasn’t unconscious. And he wasn’t even badly injured yet! He was basically beat up like a kid in a schoolyard. Yeah, that’s unpleasant, but you’re still alive, and I’m sure that if you had the will, you could at least communicate. Dream didn’t even do anything while he still had the chance. While he still had the power to walk. You’d think with all that HP, he’d have a stronger resolve to like, you know, do something.

Ah, gosh. I’m sorry. That kinda turned into another rant. It wasn’t supposed to.

Sorry if I didn’t end up making any points with this. It was pretty fun to make though, and you can feel free to laugh at my inbetween comedic reactions to things.

If you’ll excuse me… I gotta go work on WW Dreamtale.

#spoilers #but it's just a theory! a GAME theory!#or not #thanks for reading #cross x dream comic #random stuff #cross sans #dream sans #nightmare sans #killer sans #he was there

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pastel-rosed-blog · 7 years

Text

EPILOGUE: The Best Birthday Gift

Genre: Fluff

Words: 1789

Pairing: Tiffany (SNSD) x Reader (F)

First part’s over here!

Luckily, the girls' photoshoot fell on a Saturday, my rest day. I was free, and it was the perfect opportunity to go see my girlfriend. My girlfriend. I shuddered and felt giddy all over. It's finally official. I'd have to get used to calling her that from now on.

She and the other girls may be tired from lack of sleep so I decided to bring treats. I brought eight frappes, all the same flavor to avoid favoritism, to the set of the photoshoot. Sunny texted me the location and informed security that I'll be coming. It was one hell of a challenge not getting any of the drinks spilled on my car seat, and even more carrying them to the third floor of the building alone.

Pushing open the glass door with my shoulder, Yuri, who had just finished taking her individual shots and was resting in the corner, noticed me and helped with my handful of drinks.

"OHH Y/N!! It's been a while! What're these...Frappes? Are these for us? Y/N, you're jjang! Hey guys, Y/N's here!"

Dodging the staff that were redoing their makeup, Seohyun and Yoona came over excitedly to get the drinks and distribute them to their unnies.

"Y/N, you're really kind. Belated happy birthday! By the way, I'm really sorry if I wasn't able to attend dinner last night..", Seohyun pouted. "It's all right. If you came I'd be obliged to treat you to steak too. Then I will make you pay for yours afterwards.""Ah jinjja!" She slapped my arm teasingly, then I remembered the main reason I came. "Seohyun-ah, do you know where Tiffany is right now? Can you take me to her?"

The kind maknae led me through a sea of staff, busy going about the set, carrying some props and coordinating through their headsets. I noticed the theme of the photoshoot was summer on the beach. The staff had a backdrop of the shore adorned with palm trees, complete with a view of bright blue ocean waters. They also hung white sheets that serve as makeshift curtains on bamboo poles and set up a couple of rattans and a table decorated with tall glasses of colorful, refreshing fruit shakes with tiny umbrellas resting on the rim. It was in that same moment that I also observed what Yuri, Yoona and Seohyun were wearing and simultaneously realized the motif of the girls' clothes: white and flowy blouses and light gowns, something that epitomizes "goddesses of the beach". Even if I was temporarily preoccupied with how gorgeous the girls will complement this bright set, I was careful not to step over all the cords and plugs. Yoona trailed behind us, carrying the other drinks.

Seohyun brought me to the back of the studio, where there were several changing rooms. I took a peek at the few that were open: one on the right had Sunny playing video games and Taeyeon next to her, working on her coloring book. Yoona ducked in and set their drinks on the table. Seeing the frappes, Taeyeon looked up quickly and mouthed "thanks" at me. In the adjacent room were Sooyoung and Hyoyeon, already dressed and getting their hair and makeup done. Yuri handed them their drinks, saying it's from me. I peeked in and yelled as I passed "Yah Choi Sooyoung!! We're even now, okay?" and ran out before I heard a diss, demanding more for her Cupid act last night. The changing room at the back has Yoona, Seohyun and Tiffany. I distributed to the two youngest their drinks and set the last one on the nearest dresser.

Tiffany was sitting and listening to something intently on her phone. I crept up behind her and covered her eyes. She was startled but she did not put up a fight. I removed one earphone, then leaned in closer to her ear and whispered "It's me," and left a quick peck on her cheek before letting go. I can hear sounds of disgust mixed with glee from Yoona and Seohyun. Tiffany removed her other earphone and turned to face me, smiling sweetly from ear to ear. "Jagi~ what brings you here? I thought you'd be resting."

I handed her the last frappe and she took it cheerfully, squealing and even dancing a bit in her chair. As she started sipping and assumed her sitting position from earlier, I stood close to her back again and this time, wrapped my arms around her, resting my chin on the crown of her head.

I took a good, long look at her in the mirror. She was fully dolled up for the shoot. Even when she wore a simple, white jacket with denim shorts and a few gold bangles, and her voluminous, auburn hair ending with luscious curls...I was very certain; she was the most splendid beach goddess out of all the goddesses in here.

"I thought you guys could use a pick-me up. And besides, I really really missed my girlfriend." Tiffany gripped my arm tightly, signalling that she felt the same, and thankful for the drink too. But right then, she stood up abruptly, making me take a few steps back.

"AH!! That's right. There's something I want to give you," her voice trailed away as she walked over to her huge pink bag on the opposite side of the room, digging through its contents for something. Curious about what it was, I looked over to Yoona and Seohyun for a hint, but they silently got up and left, exchanging mischievous smiles.

Tiffany brought out a black velvet box, and handed it to me. "Open it, jagi. It's yours." Raising my eyebrows, I took the box and unveiled a luxurious, rose gold necklace with a peculiar pendant: a small amethyst gemstone, shining the perfect hue of my favorite color purple, encapsulated by a shape that resembles half a heart. It was a very beautiful necklace indeed; I was overwhelmed by all the warm emotions swelling up in me.

"Fany, I absolutely love it! And it's amethyst, you remembered my birthstone! When did you get it?"

Tiffany took the box from me, removed the necklace and made me stand in front of the dresser. "Hold your hair up for a while, jagi." I watched her in the mirror as she dangled the necklace around my neck, and placed the lock. She took a step back to observe my reaction in the mirror. I fixed my hair and admired myself as well, then I continued to play with the pendant.

"I got this a few weeks ago, after the girls convinced me that it was time to fix us. It just reminded me of you, when I saw that shade of purple which I'm sure you love. I planned to give this last night but I stupidly left the box in my drawer at home. At least today I remembered to place it in my bag this time, in case I finished the shoot early and I could go visit you. The pendant is half a heart, because...well, you know where the other half is." She patted her chest. Her eyesmile shone, it was a very happy one, so I widely smiled back. "Happy birthday again, Y/N." This time she hugged me from the back, her arms sliding around my waist. She rested her chin on the space between my neck and shoulder. I placed both my arms on top of hers and held her hands closer to me.

"Jagi, you really made my birthday this year. You're the best. I love you." She giggled and pecked me on the cheek. We stood like that in front of the mirror for a while, completely absorbed in our little bubble of happiness, until someone from the doorway yelled "YAH Y/N IT WILL TAKE MORE THAN ONE FRAPPE TO THANK ME FOR MAKING THIS CHEESY REUNION A SUCCESS", the voice was undeniably Sooyoung's.

Tiffany released me from her back hug and we walked over to Sooyoung as she also entered the room. "Also, Y/N-ah, did you know that Fany also wrote a song about you while you guys weren't okay? She's making me rewrite it to include your name somewhere in the lyrics too---" Tiffany rushed over to her and covered her mouth, pushing her blabbing form out the doorway while I stood there, dumbfounded. Tiffany slammed the door behind Sooyoung.

"Jagi, don't panic. I can explain." She sat down on the sofa and patted the space next to her, inviting me over. I started frowning. What about me did she write? Am I the bad guy? Is she 'Taylor Swift'-ing me right now?

"Jagi" she looked me straight in the eyes, "I'm not 'Taylor Swift'-ing you, okay?" My frown disappeared; how did she read my mind?

"The company gave me the green light to start preparations for my solo album." I suddenly lit up in excitement. "Jagiya, that's great news!! You’ve always hinted at it before but now it's actually happening! Congrats!"

"Well they mostly made me pick from songs that were already written, and I barely got my own songs in. Luckily they agreed to this one, the one I wrote about you." She grabbed her phone and handed me the earphones. "Here, listen to it jagi. I wrote about my feelings during our time apart. I swear, you're not the bad guy." As soon as I settled, she played the demo of her self-written song.

Don't know what to do, baby, 'cause I'm not over you

What do I do, baby? You're still the one

And I can't seem to move on from the thought of being apart

I'm sitting here alone and lost and confused, so what do I do~

I listened intently, absorbing the lyrics while getting lost in the R&B synth pop sound. She really put her thoughts and feelings in the song. It made me feel guilty at first, learning more of her side, but I oddly felt proud that I was the inspiration for the verses. The pop sound of the track definitely matches the lyrics and the song overall is totally her style. This song is definitely Tiffany. When the music stopped, I took the earphones out and she looked at me shyly. "I was about to give you the heads up but, jinjja, that Sooyoung. She's actually rewriting it in Korean, and it's gonna be in the tracklist as well...so is it okay with you that this song will be included in my solo album?"

I chuckled at the prospect. Korea and all the international fans out there will hear this story. But they won't know it's me. Not right away at least.

"Jagi you know I’m supporting you always. Of course it's fine. But when you win at the year-end awards for being the best rookie with the best album because of this song, you'll give me some of the royalties, okay?"

A/N: wow, i promise i’ll be more consistent in updating next time HAHA

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