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#although since i've decided to rewatch the originals after this the changes are going to be interesting
laufire · 1 year
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hallucination!caroline as recreated by silas: *reluctantly but intensely concerned upon seeing klaus wounded* “what happened to you??” “OMG!!! klaus the white-oak stake could kill you!!” *touches his face to comfort him*
the real deal: “i got your 50 bajillion messages this better be life-and-death” *constantly aggravated* “i’m supposed to be running three different prom committees and you keep phone stalking me?!?” “idk if this is you flirting but it sucks and i have more important things to do” *hears he’s mortally wounded and calmly asks why would silas even attack him* *ennumerates his crimes* “and you think I’m the person to call for help?!?” *exasperated eye-roll* *mocks him as she digs for a splinter inside his chest* “you DO have a heart.” *stabs knife further down* “my bad, it’s just a bloody rib” *reflexibly apologises for hurting him* “you know what?” *pulls back knife with force* “i’m not sorry u deserve to suffer.” *texting while he agonizes about the splinters in his chest* “i feel sorry for u” “i used all your bleach” “if you need anything else... DON’T call me. i have a prom to plan.” *holds for a confirmation of tyler’s (relative) safety and doesn’t actually confirm friendship exists between them*
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hiwataris-bitch · 24 days
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My ESC 2024 ranking
Although I'm not as into ESC this year as I was the year before, I still wanted to do the ranking. It's kinda rushed since I have only listened to some of the songs for the first time yesterday, but my top 10 was established long before that so who cares. Anyways, here goes:
1-10 Best songs ever:
1. Finland - I LOVE THEM I LOVE THIS SONG THIS IS THE BEST SONG EVERYONE ELSE GO HOME. Finland sending banger again this year. My absolute favourite.
2. Austria - another huge banger, brings me back to early 2000s and I really love the lyrics
3. Poland - okay, look, I KNOW she doesn't sing all that well live. But I really like the song itself so let me have this one. It's gonna be a miracle if we qualify, but still I just like the song.
4. Switzerland - opera and rap in one song? I didn't expect myself to like it as much as I do, but it's just so catchy!
5. United Kingdom - another catchy song for me I can listen to on repeat (maybe slightly less than I can listen to Poland, but still good)
6. San Marino - great rock tune, another song that brings me back to the 2000s, although in a different way than Austria does.
7. Croatia - although they're only 7th on my list, I won't be mad if this wins, because just like San Marino, it is another solid, good rock entry.
8. Netherlands - you can clearly see my taste for crazy performances in this top 10, so it would be an offence if I didn't put the Netherlands here as well. It isn't my favourite, but still a song I like and enjoy very much.
9. Spain - okay, maybe the performance I saw on youtube made me put it higher than I would, I'm not really sure. But I have listened to this song quite a lot since it released.
10. Estonia - to complete my ultimate crazy tunes group for this year, they also closes my top 10. They make a perfect team with Finland, Croatia and the Netherlands. My top 10 would be just top 4 if it wasn't for some other songs that also turned out to be good..
11-20 Songs I like very much:
11. Albania - she was SO CLOSE to making it to my top 10, but I liked the other songs slightly more. Still, 11th place is the lowest I will ever put this song, because for whatever reason it really speaks to me.
12. Iceland - originally it was lower on my list, but after some time I decided it was way too catchy so it had to be moved up. It's really pleasant to listen to.
13. Czechia - I've read comments complaining she can't sing live. Maybe. But just like with Poland, I just like the song and you're not going to change my mind. Nobody listens to live versions after the contest ends anyway, unless they're rewatching the performances.
14. Luxembourg - tbh my places 12-14 kept being rearranged since I like all three of these songs almost equally as much. I am really happy to see Luxembourg return to Eurovision and I think they chose a great song for their return. It's one of the earworms for me.
15. Italy - just like above, places 15-17 kept switching for me. And although I listen to this song a lot, to the point I often skip it now when it comes on my spotify, I cannot in good conscience put it any lower. Even though I listened to it too much I still have to appreciate how good of a song this is.
16. Sweden - I've only listened to it today, but Sweden brings a high production quality this year as well (honestly, what'd you expect from them?). It is a good song, although it doesn't really do anything special for me. Still, It's just pleasant to listen to.
17. Moldova - similar to Sweden, but production value is slightly lower. But I just like fast songs.
18. Lithuania - honestly, I am slightly surprised I put it above Cyprus, because unlike Cyprus, I can barely recall this song. But I like it when I listen to it. Also, good for Lithuania for not singing in English, that is always refreshing to hear.
19. Cyprus - could be switched with Lithuania, but when I actually listen to both these songs one after another, I actually like Cyprus slightly less. They used to be higher on my list, but sadly, their song is a bit too average for me.
20-29 Song I don't care about all that much:
20. Latvia - okay, I lied, I care about this song. I don't usually listen to slower tunes, they have to actually make me feel something, and this one does. I wish I could put it higher, but I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with it.
21. Australia - I mean, it is fine, but too generic. Still, a faster tune will always be slightly higher on my list.
22. Georgia - similar to Australia, except I care about this one even less.
23. Slovenia - another love-hate for me. I appreciate this song and how different it is, I really do. But I can only listen to it once in a while, otherwise I get overwhelmed. Anyway, I like them a bit more because my name's also Veronika (except spelled with W and not V)
24. Denmark - they're... just fine I guess.
25. Germany - an okay song I can listen to and forget immediately. Just like with Denmark, except I forget this one even faster.
26. Belgium - I remember this one, it's just really not my cup of tea. Like, it is a good song, just not really something I listen to.
27. Malta - okay, now this is a bit annoying of a song. I will listen to it if it's on the radio or something, but I wouldn't choose to listen to it on my own free will.
28. Ukraine - look, it isn't a bad song, definitely better than Malta. But it sounds just like many other songs we've heard from Ukraine and honestly, I'm just bored of them.
29. Norway - another not a bad song, but has some parts that annoy me. Would be much higher without them. It's simply too heavy for me at some parts.
30-37 I literally couldn't care less:
30. Azerbaijan - what ever this is, sorry, I barely remember this song, I don't even know why I put it as high as I did, I guess it was less annoying than the others.
31. Portugal - I kinda like the instrumental, but it is a slow song and not a type of a slow song I would ever listen to.
32. Serbia - I don't like ballads.
33. Greece - I'm sorry, it's just too annoying to listen to...
34. Armenia - okay, it's better than Greece in that it's not annoying, but I just don't listen to this kind of music.
35. Ireland - girl, I appreciate your style, but your song is too much for me.
36. France - no. Sorry, just no.
37. Israel - why are you here, y'all know what you did. You know what you're doing.
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hollowsart · 1 year
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Hey Hollow, I have a (few hundred) question(s)! Do you think that Mysterio puts glitter in the smoke that he uses? Also if he did do you think he would use edible glitter? Honest questions all around.
(also another question that is more so for Aceida, does she wear different costumes for different times of the year/weather?)
((okay one more, because I know that I will forget but I've wanted to ask this question for a while, Aceida. How did you come up with her, why, and what do you think are the most important things to have for Aceida))
Thank you for answering any of this, it's just that sometimes I'm shy and then.... KABOOM lots of questions that may or may not be useful or worth your time. Anyways! Love what and who you are and I'm proud of you!
Sorry, I need to get this cursed thing out of my system first:
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OK ANYWAYS, to seriously answer your questions!!!
[APOLOGIES, THIS IS SO LONG “orz]:
=========
1) Does Mysterio use glitter?
Well, I would be disappointed if he didn’t LOL
Special biodegradable glitter that is a-ok for the environment is definitely something he’d use! Mostly for his entrances and exits tho, just to add that extra bit of flair to his performance. He thrives on the melodrama.
Edible glitter would also be good, just in case someone inhaled it by accident when he makes his grand appearance or get away. I mean, he’s not a killer, he’d actually be upset if someone innocent got hurt during his “performances”, someone he wasn’t intending on hurting in some way.. He’d feel horrible about it and, if given the opportunity, he would apologize.
But yeah, this man absolutely uses glitter! :D (despite my loathing of glitter that isn’t sealed to prevent it from transferring to other things, I’d so totally hug him still regardless of the risk of getting glitter on me for days after)
2) Does Acedia have seasonal outfits?
[I will post these by themselves shortly for better viewing!!]
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Been meaning to design some alterations to the Sloth Suit, and this gave me the motivation to do just that! Enjoy my seasonal hero wear!
3) How did you come up with Acedia?
OK SO. STORY TIME:
I originally thought about joining everyone during the initial big spidersona bang when Into the Spiderverse was first released and everyone was making their own. I saw a few people talking about spider crab based spidersonas and wanted to join that but, well.. that was too difficult and I never was able to come up with anything cool.
sometime down the line I was initially interested in the anime My Hero Academia (thank heck I never watched more than barely the full first season, knowing all the drama and junk that’s happened, I dodged a bullet LOL) but I did come up with some oc’s for it and even a ‘quirksona‘ that was sloth based named Acedia, basically myself, but more sloth and also not as cool as I wanted:
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You can see where I’m going with this lol
nothing came of that character so cut to years later, this year, I recently rewatched Spiderverse and started to get into the Spiderman side of things again out of the blue after watching TSSM and falling in love with the show all over again, and doodling Doc Ock, too. I thought back to my old failed attempt at making a spidersona, so I decided to try my hand at that again.
I remembered Acedia’s design and tbh I really did love the design so I reworked it and made adjustments to better resemble a sloth and better resemble Spiderman’s iconic appearance. On top of that I did also just make the character under the costume ME with no real changes at all. And thus, Acedia, The Cryptid Crawler was created:
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although the ref sheet has since been updated and changed from this^^
Anyways, that’s the story behind Acedia’s creation!
I just really like sloths.
I’m not exactly sure what you mean by “most important things to have for Acedia“ but I hope some of this answers that? maybe? you’re free to elaborate on what you mean by that and I can do my best to answer!
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not jealous | jake sim
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summary: jake sim is not a jealous person. at least that's what he tells himself. so why does he find himself going through your phone when a certain "bluejay park" decides to text you?
pairing: jake sim x y/n [ft. mentions of jay park]
genre: angst, fluff 
warnings: angst, cursing (very minimal), one slightly suggestive sentence, jake being cute, some more angst lol, slightly cheesy bc jake’s just too cute ugh
wc: 3.8k
a/n: ok i loved writing this, which is why i went on to almost 4k words LOL oops. but anyways, i love jake a little too much and this type of scenario has been running around in my head for a while now so i decided to put it into words. also i may have created this blog just so i could post this somewhere LMAO anyways yeah this was my first fic so hope you guys enjoyyyy <3
Jake Sim is not a jealous person.
At least that's what he tells himself. To be fair, in his past relationships, he never showed any jealously. Then again, he doesn't know if he can call those relationships, "relationships". Does a fifth grade relationship with a girl who he was once dared to kiss during a game of Truth or Dare in the basement of a classmate's house during their 11th birthday party count? He doesn't remember being jealous when the same girl was later dared to kiss his classmate, Sunghoon. (Funny enough, that's how the two boys came to be best friends 'til this day, but that's a story for another time.) 
But really, Jake doesn't think jealously is one of his traits, even if he's now almost 20 years old without any experience with love other than his current relationship with you and that short-lived romance in the fifth grade. (What was her name again? Jake would have to ask Sunghoon later.)
So he doesn't know what clicked in that brain of his that lead him to this current situation he was in. He doesn't know why he felt a little spark of anger in him when your phone, which you left right next to him on the couch while you went to take a shower, kept buzzing with texts from "bluejay park". He doesn't know why he couldn't kept his eyes distracted from the messages, although your phone was constantly lighting up because whatever it was Jay had to say to you, he would not shut up about it. He doesn't know why he questioned what your relationship with Jay was for a split second.
In fact, you're close with all of Jake's friends. That's one of his favorite things about you, you get along so well with all his friends you might as well replace Jake himself in the friend group. So he doesn't know what tells him to take a little glance at your phone—at the messages.
But he finds himself doing it anyways.
Hearing that the water in the shower was still running (you were always the type to take long showers), he quickly grabs your phone and scrolls through the lock screen just to find that he couldn't even read the messages since you had your notifications set so no one could read them unless the phone was unlocked (darn you and your settings!) Thankfully, Jake knew your passcode––and you knew his too––or he thought he did. Until the iPhone vibrated, telling him the passcode was wrong.
He must've entered it too fast or something. So he tries again.
And again.
And again.
Until the iPhone switches its screen to say: "iPhone is disabled. Try again in 5 minutes."
There's no way. You never change your password. And even if you did, you would tell him—you two even had each other's fingerprints saved into each other's phones in the past (you know, before the world decided that Apple's home button was too lame and decided to just completely get rid of it). If there was an option to save multiple faces for Face ID, you two would be that couple that saved each others faces in your own phones.
That being said, Jake sat there, your phone in hand, frozen. Why was your phone locked? Why was Jay texting you 10 texts per second? Why did he feel guilty about this entire situation?
He hears the shower switch off and in that moment, he swears he feels his heart beat just a little faster. He tells himself there's no way you'll be out before the 5 minutes are up. You followed a really meticulous skincare routine (one that Jake memorized by now) that took an extra 15 minutes of your time after each shower.
"Hey Jake?" Your voice calls out from the tiny bathroom door crack that you left open before you hopped in the shower, "Is my phone out there? Do you mind bringing it to me?"
Fuck.
Jake shifts on the couch. Taps his foot on the ground. Returns your phone to its original spot. Clears his throat.
"Don't you want to get dressed first?" he calls back, quite timidly.
He can hear you stop moving around in the bathroom. Probably telling yourself what an odd response that was. To be fair, it was an odd question, considering the fact that you two have been together for so long, it’s not like he hasn’t seen you undressed before...intentionally or not. 
Next thing he knows, the steam is rolling out of the bathroom door and you're stepping out in your towel, eyebrows raised.
"If you didn't want to get up from the couch, you could've just said so, you lazy butt," you smirk at him as you walk towards him and the couch, leaving a faint trail of water drops behind you. Jake's eyes follow your figure as you go to grab your phone and lift the screen towards yourself.
That's when he freezes. You do too.
You cock your head, as if asking yourself why it was disabled. He can hear the gears in your head turning.
"Jake, did you try to unlock my phone?"
He runs through all the possible excuses he could blurt out. Come on Jake, think of something! But he knows he can't lie to you.
Too many beats of silence pass by.
"Maybe," he finally says—or more like murmurs. He looks up to you like a child looking up at their mom, who just them caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. To his surprise, you don't show any hint of anger. A flash of confusion—and is that worry he sees?—crosses your face for a split second before you shrug and turn towards your room to change, dropping the subject. It was natural for you two to use each other's phones anyways. So then why did you have that look of worry?
Jake knows you well, a little too well. But that's what you love about him. He can easily read all your emotions. One of the many things he picked up from dating you for almost two years now. But why would you care if he tried to get into your phone? Why would that worry you? All the possibilities run through head and his own worry begins to increase. He trusts you. He does.
So then why does the thought bother him throughout the entire day? Why does he bring it up during dinner later that night, when you're both cuddled on your sofa, slurping take-out ramen while rewatching your favorite k-drama under the thick blanket that you always keep in your living room for nights like these?
"Huh? Of course I've heard from Jay today, we had that conversation about that stupid meme you boys kept laughing about in the groupchat we're all in, didn't we?" You answer him when he asks if you've heard from Jay lately. You sit up from your warm spot under Jake's arm to put your empty bowl on the coffee table in front of you. When you lean back, you look up at him,
"Why do you ask?"
"Oh, it's nothing, just wondering," he says, avoiding your eyes by keeping his own trained on the series currently playing on your TV. This would be your third time rewatching this series together. He would never complain to you though, he knows how much you love it and if he were being honest, he was secretly attached to the characters—not that he would ever tell you, he would never hear the end of it from you and the boys.
"You're being weird. Just tell me, or did you forget that I can practically read your mind," you say with a giggle and shove to his side, the one you were currently warmly cuddled into. Jake wasn't the only one who learned how to read emotions; you could read him just as well as he could read you. And like you, that's one of the many things he loved about you. But maybe not in this case.
He toyed around with the contents inside his ramen bowl with his chopsticks.
"I just..." God, how does he word this? Why was he having trouble explaining it? You were the easiest person to talk to. To him, you were the only person he could tell everything to.
"Jaywastextingyouabunchearlier," he blurts out quickly, but not quickly enough for you to miss it.
He feels you shift under his arm. He feels the air in the room shift. Tension.
"What?" Now you're sitting upright, legs criss-crossed in front of you on the couch but turned, so your body is completely facing him. He mirrors you, sitting up to put his ramen bowl next to yours on the surface, but he stays facing the TV.
"Your phone kept going off because of him when you were showering," he says with a little more confidence. But inside, he was nervous as hell, the same nervous as when he asked you out for the first time many moons ago. But it's too late to back out now, he brought it up first, anyways. Guess we're having this conversation now, good going Jake!
"Is that why you tried unlocking my phone earlier? I mean I thought you were just trying to leave selfies on my phone like you always do but you were trying to read my texts?" You question, slightly raising your soft voice. He doesn't know how to react, he hates confrontation.
"It wasn't like that, Jay just kept spamming you and like I—why was he even texting you in the first place? Then your phone got disabled because you changed your password, which you never do by the way, so I–"
"I changed it because my little sister kept getting into my phone when I went to visit my family yesterday! Did you really think I was hiding something from you? You know I can text whoever I want, right? You don't own me."
Okay so now he's managed to make you angry. Good going Jake, part 2!
"Okay but what does Jay need from you so bad that he has to send you like 50 messages at once?" He's standing now. So are you, eyebrows furrowed together as you collect your bowls from the table.
Standing there, bowls in hand, you say, "Jake, that's none of your business! It wasn't even that big of a deal, I don't know why you felt the need to nosy around."
"Well, if he's texting you non-stop, then obviously it's a big deal! We wouldn't even be having this conversation if you would just tell me what you guys were talking about," he murmurs back, eyes narrowing. You scoff as you trail into your kitchen. He follows behind and stops at the other side at your kitchen island as you place the dirty dishes into the sink.
"No, we're having this conversation because you obviously don't trust me! It doesn't matter what we were talking about, it doesn't matter who I was texting! I could be texting your mother and I shouldn't have to tell you what we were talking about! That's why we're having this conversation," you say as you turn back to face him from the other end.
He hates this. He hates fighting with you (which is a very, very rare occasion). He hates that you think he doesn't trust you. He hates his insecurity eating at him, telling him to keep questioning you on why you and Jay were talking in the first place. He was aware that you were close with his friends, but it wasn't until the texts he realized just how close you are with them. It's not that he didn't trust you, he just didn't know how to act when it came to you and other guys. God knows how he got lucky enough to meet you, let alone date you, so the thought of him losing you to someone else actually terrified him. Not only were you his first real relationship, but he wanted you to be his first and only one in life. You were it for him.
"Why did he text you." He deadpans from his side of the kitchen.
You scoff with a hint of exasperation. "You're kidding me."
You stare at him. He stares back, quirking an eyebrow, as if restating the same question back, as if testing you.
You're fuming now. Why was he making it so hard? Why was he doubting you? Out of frustration, you start laughing, which scares him. That can't be good.
"Fine. You wanna know so bad? Take a look,"  you're one tone level away from screaming as you take your phone out of your pocket, unlock it, and open up your conversation with "bluejay park", sliding the phone across the island to reach him.
Jake stares at the phone which now lies there, unlocked, facing him. Isn't this what he wanted? It is, right? That's why he started this dreaded argument with you in the first place.
Then why does he feel so fucking awful?
He looks back up at you, to see you sighing and looking up at the ceiling, as if trying to force your forming tears back into your eyes.
Yup, he feels horrible.
"Happy? Happy to know we were just trying to plan a surprise birthday party for you but you and your jealously just had to know huh, Jake?" You quickly state, voice cracking, as you tried not to choke up. You weren't sad that he found out about the surprise. You were sad that it felt like he didn't trust you. That he thought you were the type of person to do god knows what behind his back. You hated the feeling of not being trusted. Especially by Jake, of all people.
"Fuck."
Jake's face (and heart) falls with the most broken expression you've ever seen. But you're too sad, angry, tired (a mix of all?) to care. Your only goal right now is to not let him see you cry.
You hurry past him, across your apartment, and into your bedroom, slamming the door behind you, leaving behind a shocked, and regretful, Jake.
His heart shrinks when he hears the door slam shut and a little more when he looks down at the still unlocked phone in front of him. He didn't have the heart in him to look at it anymore. Of course he trusted you, he knew what you said was the truth.
He mentally screams at himself for assuming the worst––for thinking that you, a literal angel, would betray him.  First, he thought he was losing you to someone else. Now, he was afraid he just lost you through his own actions. 
He hesitantly sulks over to your door, softly knocking when he reaches it.
"Y/N?"
No response.
"Y/N, I'm so sorry. I didn't know, I let my—”
"Jake just please leave me alone for now," he hears you painfully say from a distance, meaning you're on your bed. He knows the door's unlocked—the lock on your door hasn't been working for a long time now, despite the many times he tells you to talk to your landlord about it. But he doesn't find it in him to open it. He knows he messed up. If he saw you in there right now, crying, he wouldn't know what to do. He wouldn't know what he would to do himself, knowing he was the reason behind your tears.
He nods in silence, knowing you can't see him, but does so anyways and returns to his spot on the couch. He could leave right now, go back to the dorm with the rest of the guys, let you have your space like you wanted. But his heart hurts at the idea of leaving you sad, angry, or a combination of both. He can't leave this unresolved. He fucked up, he has to fix it.
And so he sits on your couch for another hour. The clock on the wall behind him continues to tick as the silent tension in your apartment continues to grow. When it hits 11pm and he's sure you've slumbered off into sleep, he quietly enters your room.
He can see your figure in the dark, your back facing the door as you're curled up into yourself under the comforter. He feels his heart drop a little more when he imagines you crying in that position from earlier. He slowly peels the comforter open and gets into his side of the bed, careful not to bother your sleeping figure.
Laying there, staring up at the ceiling, he's never felt more like a stranger in your bed. It's not that he hasn't slept over before, god knows he's probably slept over at your place more than he has in his own bed. But right now, in this moment, he just felt awful. Like he didn't deserve to be in such close proximity to you. How could he be deserving? He violated your privacy, made you feel like you weren't trusted, doubted your relationship.
These thoughts run through Jake's head as he stares up at your ceiling fan, wishing he could turn back time to a few hours ago, before he checked your phone, before he let his insecurities get to the best of him.
You can feel the dip he makes in the bed behind you when he gets in. Of course you're not asleep. There's no way sleep could reach you when you had the recent events constantly replaying in your head like a broken record.
You knew Jake with all your heart. You didn't have to look at him to know he was probably laying there, hurt, staring up at the ceiling, drafting what to say once you wake up—or once he knows you're actually still awake.
You decide to break the tension by turning to lay on your other side, facing him.
You were wrong. Thanks to the little sliver of moonlight shining through your sheer curtains, you can see him, now laying on his side, already looking at you with so much regret in his eyes. You can almost hear the cracks in your heart physically forming.
His eyes widen when he realizes you're still awake. He opens his mouth to say something, but not before you quickly shift over to his side of the bed and embrace him in a tight hold, burying your face into his chest. Without any hesitation, he returns the gesture, arms holding your body as close to him as possible. As if once he let go, he'd lose you forever.
He lets out a sigh of relief as he breathes you in. He didn't even know he was holding his breath all this time.
"I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry Y/N," he mutters into your hair. He feels his hoodie getting wet from where you buried your face. He pulls you closer, if that's even possible, feeling his own eyes heating up with sadness. He would never forgive himself for making you feel this way.
"You know I trust you right? Please know that. I shouldn't have assumed the worst when I saw your phone. I...I let my insecurities get to the best of me."
You move your head from its home on his chest to look up at him, as if asking him to elaborate. This was new to you, you didn't know he held insecurities in your relationship. But it wasn't because of you, no, you were his entire world. Losing you meant losing everything.
Jake's never been the best at saying his feelings. That's why it took him so long (with the help of his six best friends) to finally confess how he felt about you. He was afraid of letting people in if they could easily walk out. Maybe that's why he never let anyone into his life before you. But oh, were you an exception. The second he met you, he knew he was fucked. But thank god he did, because thanks to you, he's been able to be more open, more vulnerable. He's able to talk to you about anything and everything. He doesn't have that same fear of losing people anymore, not when he has you in his life to reassure him every step of the way. But right now, in this moment, he doesn't know how to tell you that his new fear was, in fact, just losing you.
The sheer idea of you not being a part of his life anymore terrified him. 
"I hope you know you're never going to lose me Jake, if that's what you're insecure about," you softly mutter as you wrap your free arm that's not stuck in between both your bodies around him to gently play with the ends of his hair. It's as if you could read his mind, he loves that you know him so well.
"It just sucks that you could even think I would ever do something as awful as what you were assuming...with one of your closest friends nonetheless," you continue.
"I know. I know, and I feel terrible. I'm so sorry. I know you would never do anything remotely close to that, and I know you would never intentionally try to keep anything from me," he sighs. He shifts so he can lie down on his back, bringing you with him to lie on his chest, never letting you go once. "It's just...I just don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you Y/N. Everyday, I ask myself what heroic thing I must've done in my past life to deserve this life with you and I can't help but think you could just as easily be stripped away from me."
As much as your heart breaks listening to him rant, you feel your love for him grow even more. You knew how hard it was for him to put his true emotions into words, and him telling you this reminded you how much trust he had in you.
After some moments of silence, moments of him drawing random shapes onto your back, moments of you two just holding each other like it was the end of the world, you speak up.
"I love you. I'm sorry for making you doubt yourself—"
"No, it's not your fault, I can't help but think things like that. I just don't know what I did to deserve you, and I know that I need to be mo–"
"Babe let me finish," you say with a little giggle in your tone. He immediately stops and mutters a little "sorry". How cute, you tell yourself.
"I was gonna say," you look back up at him so you're making direct eye contact now. "You're the only one that's ever on my mind, Jake. I can't help the way you think, but I can assure you that there is no one else I would rather be with. And I mean that for the rest of life."
You snuggle back into the comfortable hoodie he's currently wearing (you make a mental note to yourself to steal it from him later) and decide to ease the tension,
"So you're stuck with me for life, sorry to inform you Mr. Sim."
Jake lets out a laugh, looking down at you to see you returning his smile with a cheeky one.
"I love you. So much," he says so sincerely, so genuinely, that you almost tear up again from how content you were. Now you were asking yourself, what did you do to deserve him?
Jake Sim is not a jealous person.
No, he just loves you.
A lot.
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falcqns · 2 years
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Fame Dr: like what sort of things do you do, like acting/training for roles (like stunt training and stuff), photo shoots, premieres? How do you deal with the paparazzi? Do you ever get overwhelmed? I’m afraid I’ll find it super scary and not fun, I know I could script that stuff out but idk if I should
when it comes to training for roles, it just depends on the movie! here's my roles and what i did to prepare:
tv shows:
The Witcher S3: i did some sword training, and learned to ride a horse again (i used to be a horseback rider but havent ridden in years so it was nice to brush up on it!). i had a dialect coach as well as i needed a british accent lmao
The Orville New Horizons: no real training required, just read a few books that Seth recommended to me so i could understand what i was saying and met with Neil Degrasse Tyson with Seth as well and he answered any questions i had
Criminal Minds: nothing really, although i did take a refresher psych course, and met with a forensic psychologist and a profiler to interview them and get a taste for the work they had to do on a daily basis
Murdoch Mysteries: nothing! just team bonding really, which i did with all of them!
The Falcon and The Winter Soldier: not my first marvel project but i sustained an injury during The Witcher shoot so i had to rebuild by core muscles a little. i also read the comics about my character.
Movies:
We're The Millers: no prep i literally showed up and did what my mom told me to do lmao
Knives Out 2: team bonding which was scary and i had just come off of The Witcher shoot (literally less than 18 hours after wrapping) and was exhausted but we all went out and partied. other than that, i met with Rian and rewatched the first one
Batman v Superman: oh dear lord. i put myself through literal hell for this role but i dont regret it. i was eating as healthy as i could and working out every day, plus fight training, and taking extra ballet classes to make sure my body was in the best shape it could be (shit was rough) so i could do my own stunts. met with Zack Snyder and read all the comics Kara is in. I only met with Henry once as despite being in the same film, we were only in 2 scenes together, and one of them i didn't talk so we barely connected (he literally forgot that we were in the same movie and thought they'd recasted the original actor for Justice League the big dummy)
Mama Mia Here We Go Again: i took some refresher vocal lessons since i've only ever sang praise songs in church.
Mockinbird: my first marvel project and it literally knocked me on my ass. i thought the training for Batman v Superman was rough, it was nothing compared to this and the sheer amount of time and choreography that goes into a single fight scene oh my gosh. when i wasnt training, i was reading every single marvel comic that had my characters parents in it, and was meeting with illustrators and writers because my character wasn't in the comics, but was actually an original character that took over the internet bc of a fanfiction in 2012, and they decided to add her in lol so that meant making new comics that fit into the mcu timeline and giving my character a back story before the movies. i also met with so many marvel executives, was constantly doing interviews and meeting new people and trying to adjust to script changes practically hourly. i literally couldnt move or speak when i got a break from filming. i loved every second of it though!
Spiderman No Way Home: had just finished filming Man of Steel 2 so no training needed physically, but rewatched my past marvel projects and reread some comics that Kevin told me to to remind myself of the character
Enola Holmes 2: read the Enola Holmes book series and a few Sherlock books. i also watched Sherlock Holmes (the one w rachel mcadams as she played my character before i did) but thats about it. Henry actually remembered who i was and recommended me for the role
Secrets of Dumbledore: wand training! i took a beginners latin course to help with pronunciation at the request of JKR
Multiverse of Madness: no retraining, finished filming NWH and went into preproduction for MoM immediately
Drawing With Light: re read the book, met with the author, and met with my dialect coach again
They Both Die At The End: met with the author and reread the book!
and ngl, i despise photo shoots. i hate them with a passion, but i power through because i know they're important, but other than for promo, i don't do photo shoots which can sound weird considering im working on a makeup line with Sephora but i chose to have my siblings model it instead (with their consent of course).
and premieres can be fun if you make them fun! the red carpet usually lasts for an hour or two before the movie actually starts, and (at least for me) i only ever do between 3 and 5 interviews on the carpet because anything else overwhelms me and i'll shut down. i spend the rest of the time talking to fans and taking photos, and i'll go into the theatre early to give myself a noise and speaking break before the movie starts, and then the movie starts, and its so much different from a regular movie screening. everyone stays until the end credits, every one claps for everyone, and not a single person gets up during the movie (u didn't hear this from me but my mom wears depends for premieres just in case). the director and executives and producers usually talk to the audience and thank them and things, and sometimes it happens before and sometimes i happens after. just depends on the timing and the studio really!
i fucking hate paparazzi. i don't hate the people bc i know they're just doing their job, but i find it a tad ridiculous they have to approach me while shopping for pads and ask me how i feel about Pete Davidson and Kim Kardashian dating WHEN WE HAVENT BEEN TOGETHER FOR 3 FUCKIN YEARS. they can take photos of me all they want, i dont care. they can literally blast "ava aniston shops for period products at 3 am in dri fit shorts, puma socks, birkenstocks that are falling apart and a red henley that looks like it belongs to chris evans" all they want but to ask me about an ex's new relationship pisses me off and crosses a line. and dont get me started on the way they were when my grandma passed away because how dare i go get a coffee when i should be at home comforting my grieving mother 🙄
and i absolutely get overwhelmed. my dad has gone viral a few times because he doesnt hesitate to yell at the paparazzi when they cross a line or when he can tell i'm overstimulated. i'm very thankful that i have someone like my chrissy boy who can tell when i've had enough and am going to meltdown/shutdown and removes me from the situation (literally called his mom to come and get me in front of them because they all know not to mess w mama lisa and her babies)!
you can always script these things out, but i didnt, because it gives me a better appreciation for celebrities and the things they go through, and i personally think its a part of the experience. and messing with the press is kind of fun (in the middle of gaslighting them into thinking chris and i are married and we're having tons of fun with it) so just remember that its your dr and you can change whatever you want within reason!!
happy shifting and i hope this helps! <3
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the-trashy-phoenix · 3 years
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Supernatural season 1 review (part 2)
Link to part 1:
The good thing about deciding to rewatch a show that I started five years ago is that I barely remember what happens in the first seasons. I know of course the big events, but if you asked me how each episode ends I wouldn't know how to respond, so watching it for the second time, in some ways, has been like watching it for the first time. What really changed about it is the fact that now I know what happens later in the other seasons, I know who the protagonists will become and what they will struggle with and I myself am different from the 15-year-old I was while watching it for the first time.
Five years ago I liked season 1, but I couldn't say it was one of my favourites, mostly because of the lack of interaction the two brothers have with any other important character. Yes, they have their father (who I'll talk about later) and in the last episode there's also Bobby (at that point, during the rewatch, I thought he would have never made an appearance in the first season, fortunately I was wrong), but besides them they just have each other throughout the entire season. As I rewatched it the feeling remained the same, but I think I have enjoyed this season more than I did before. Was it because I was already passionate about them? Or because I know it sets up the basics of the show and introduces some links to the next seasons? Or because, knowing already what would happen, I could focus on each episode more? One thing I noticed indeed is that these first episodes have a good storyline, besides the main one (which is not that complex if you compare it with the ones that come next): the little plots are interesting and quite original, and even if I already knew that the two boys would make it I'd still be very anxious about what would eventually happen to them. Later in the most recent seasons I couldn't get the same feeling about the episodes that revolved around a specific case, but I think the main reason why I couldn't get as involved is because the main plot becomes way more important than the single case and obviously the attention of the show is totally shifted to it (but I still think there are lots of great single episodes in the most recent seasons).
Now I feel like I need to talk about the characters. When I watched the show for the first time I didn't really love John Winchester, but now that I rewatched it, supposedly more conscious, I can't stand him. You can see he has good intentions: he loves Sam and Dean and he wants to protect them. The thing that just makes me dislike him is the fact that he does it in the wrong way. He's not a good father, even if he cares about them: who would let their children by themselves to go hunting and maybe to never come back? Who would let his oldest child become the father and mother figure for his younger brother just because they couldn't do it themselves? Who would let his child start hunting when he's too young to even hold a weapon? Who wouldn't answer the phone when they know their children might think they're dead? And who claims they want to protect their children and yet sends them on hunts? The fight he had with Sam before his son went to college seems the least disturbing thing to me.
Talking about Sam, I think he's the one I like the most in this season. First of all he doesn't give a shit about his dad's opinion and we love it, second of all he has all of the good reasons to do it: why would he listen to someone who had prioritised his desire for revenge over his love for his children? I also adore the fact that he doesn't follow his father's rules until he knows their purpose, almost as if he doesn't trust him completely, meanwhile I feel like he would follow Dean's plans more easily without questioning them. The separation from his father seems to me a good thing for Sam, since I feel like he has also detached from some of John's principles that I wouldn't agree with (I'm mostly talking about the boss-attitude he has towards the boys and the extremely masculine side he priorities for himself and for his children, but there could be other things we don't necessarily see that have shaped his most attached child's personality and prospective, just saying). Overall you can tell this first season was more focused on Sam than on Dean. He is the different brother, the rebellious one, and the one who also has psychics ability (which I totally forgot about by the way, as long with his justified obsession for Jessica's loss, which apparently is a thing that still goes on in the last season). Dean at first on the other hand could seem like the ideal child for a person like their father.
Since I've watched this show Dean has always been my favourite character. I don't really know what made me fall in love, since I usually can't stand people who have his type of personality (especially the personality he has in the first season). I think what makes me like him the most, apart from his beautiful appearance, is the fact that, while Sam's character is already exposed and has already shown a lot of depth, Dean’s one is kept somehow in the surface (probably because Sam seems the real protagonist): we see him as the classical masculine guy who just wants to go hunting, drive his car and fuck some ladies (which, I mean, isn't entirely wrong, and I think nowadays the last point, portrayed as it was in Supernatural, would be considered extremely rude and with every right to do it), but at the same time there are tiny moments when he lets us see his others sides which he tries desperately to hide deeply. And what he tries to hide the most are, of course, his feelings: his love for his brother and his family, his fear of losing the people he cares about and even his love (or deeply affection) towards Cassie (a girl I completely forgot about, again, and that I really liked, especially for the name). I feel like what sculpted Dean and made him the boy he was in the first season was mostly his father: he was the man Dean has always tried to copy and follow, and it's not surprising at all that this is who he became. He pictures himself as a soldier who has to hunt in order to please his father and as a big brother whose only purpose is to make sure his little brother is okay. Don't get me wrong, these traits are important to this character, but I think there is much more to know about him.
And this is what really intrigues me about Dean; his complexity, his contraddictions and his constant torment between what he thinks he should do and what he really wants to do. Speaking of that, I really love when, during his dad and Sam's fights, he tries to calm them down, showing his care for them, but at the end of the day he stays on Sam's side, proving he will eventually always protect him.
And that leads us to the last thing I want to talk about in this already eternal review: the two brothers. They're what carries most of the show and all of season one (because, let's be honest, when you understand their father is being a dick you stop to care about what happens to him).
I love their relationship; it's not perfect at all, especially in the first seasons. They lie to each other, they fight, they keep secrets from themselves, they prank each other (which is the best thing they do), but they love each other endlessly, and you can tell it from the start: they would do anything for the other one (that doesn't mean I ship them though) and the other's well-being is the first thing that matters to them. After all you can already tell this show is mainly about the two brothers' relationship (although I think there is also much more to look forward to).
- Carly 💚
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The Great Blank Spot @ohmarqueliot​
So much goes into creating fanfiction even before the first words hit the paper. And in-depth spotlight on our writers and the process behind their work.
Tell us about your current project.
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I’m currently working on my fic for The 39 Graves Project, for which I was allocated Timeline 24, which I've tentatively titled "All For One". The stipulations I was given related to Penny and the Library, so I’ve chosen to focus on Penny, Julia and Quentin as my main characters. In my timeline, I decided to have Penny grow up side by side with Quentin and Julia, and exploring how that change alters the events of season one has been an interesting exercise.
What is your current word count?
I’m just under 35k so far.
Do you try to write daily? Do you have word count or other goals you try to hit for each writing session?
Ideally I try to write daily, but the last few weeks have been a bit of a mess for me between work and real life responsibilities. I’m hoping to get back into the swing of it now. My word count per session tends to vary quite a bit depending on which characters I’m writing and what type of scene it is, and since this fic is focused on characters that I haven’t written as much, I’m trying to be more flexible with my expectations on word counts.
What was the inspiration for this fic?
This project is a different scenario for me, because I was initially led by the stipulations I was given. Since my stipulation was Penny-centric I worked backwards from that in order to give Penny the motivations he needed to get to that scene, and once I realised what those motivations were I had my set up for the timeline.
Did this fic require any research? How much research do you typically do for you fics?
Mostly just a hell of a lot of rewatching season one. Lately I’ve been focusing on Penny’s scenes with Victoria, but I’ve also spent a bit of time going over the niffin details. I also did a bit of research at the start about how the foster system works for how Penny ends up in New York.
How do you stay motivated between chapters/stories?
In what is a big surprise to me, I’ve actually stayed pretty motivated on my own so far! The support of the other people in The 39 Graves discord as well as the other mods has definitely helped.
Do you typically write ahead or post as you go?
Usually I post as I go because I crave validation that what I’m doing doesn’t suck, so I was expecting to struggle without feedback along the way. Somehow, though, I’m still powering through it and enjoying what I’m writing, which has actually increased my confidence in my ability to write without constant feedback.
How much planning and outlining did you do before you started putting words on paper?
I planned out the whole thing before I started writing. My outline has grown as I’ve fleshed things out, but I think it was originally about 2k words. Some chapter notes were just a brief mention of what was going to happen, others were listed in more specific detail, but I knew what I wanted from every scene before I started writing.
Has it been pretty smooth sailing or rough waters? When things get rocky, how do you handle needing to rewrite sections or scrap scenes entirely?
Mostly it’s been smooth sailing. I’ve mostly managed to stick with what I wanted to write and haven’t had to scrap anything entirely so far, although I’ve had to rework a few things when I realised canon things I still had to include but had forgotten about.
Excerpt
“If we’re bothering you so much, we can go,” she said, holding her free hand over her heart to show him just how sorry she was for having fun her own way. She leaned forward, tapping Quentin’s arm before making to rise from the couch. “Come on, Q, we better go brood somewhere else.”
“No – no, don’t, hmm,” Quentin said, stumbling over his words as he held his hand up to get her to stop getting up. Penny snorted on Julia’s other side. “We’re fine. This is a great party,” he added to Eliot. Julia tried to not roll her eyes.
“Of course it’s a great party,” Eliot said lightly. “We don’t throw sub-par parties.” His eyes never left Julia, watching her consideringly, and after a few seconds his lips stretched into a delighted smile. She wasn’t sure what he’d seen in her, and didn’t know if that smile was a good thing or not. That only sought to irritate her further. “Have fun, brooders,” he said, tucking the tray under his arm and waggling his fingers at them before turning and disappearing into the crowd.
“So he’s modest,” Penny said dryly.
The Great Blank Spot is an in-depth spotlight focusing on the writing process and previewing in-progress fics for our fandom. It is meant to be an organic, ever-evolving feature. Previously interviewed fic writers can reach out to us here, to have a specific work featured. If you’d like to have a work featured but haven’t done the author spotlight, reach out to us to get started. If you have suggestions for questions you’d like to see answered, shoot us an ask!
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