#alys is given a chance to make sure it doesn't happen

[merricatblackwoods]

oh look its hotd oc fixit fanfic idea i will never write (that is connected to my got fanfic i will also never write)

[hippiegoth97]

Heat of The Moment: Eddie Munson x Reader

Collage by me :)

Master List

Tag List: @keikoraven @ar-jupiter @alcielo1438 @cairro-xx @stolen-in-moonlight

@micheledawn1975 @janiejenn @rafescurtainbangz @melodymunson @spacedoutdaydreamer

@veemoon @sariahs-stuff @feral-pumpkin-energy @comeonatmebruh @munsoneightysixx

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@ohmeg @stalactitekilla @hellfirenacht @birdysaturne @oneforthemunny

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@bimbobaggins69 @angel-munson @eldermayfield @munsonsbtch @babygorewhore

@mediocredreams @xxbimbobunnyxx @taintedcigs @ali-r3n

Description: You're best friends with Eddie, but you're also secretly in love with him. You struggle to hide your feelings, until a visit to Lover's Lake makes you unable to keep up the act anymore. Thankfully, things go better than you expect...

Content Warning 18+ Only, Minors DNI:  smut, swearing, female reader, jealousy, crying, lots of angsty feelings, friends to lovers, metalhead!reader, drug references/use, grinding, fingering, oral sex, unprotected sex, praise/degradation, squirting

Word Count: 5.5k

Divider by @strangergraphics-archive

Heat of The Moment

You've been close friends with Eddie Munson since high school. You remember not fitting in with anybody, and then Eddie took you under his wing. He showed you how to play D&D, and all of his metal band cassette tapes. Soon after, you joined the Hellfire Club and became a full-blown metalhead. You cut your hair short and dyed it funky colors, and wore a beaten leather jacket covered in pins and patches. Your jeans were always torn, and Converse adorned your feet at all times. You even had your nose pierced, much to your mother's dismay. Your eyes were always smoky with eyeliner, and dark red lipstick made your mouth look absolutely sinful. You made guitar pick earrings and a matching necklace to wear, Eddie had generously given the picks to you. You'd even made him a necklace as well, and he gave you the biggest bear hug when you gifted it to him on his birthday. You were hoping for a kiss, but you took whatever affection you could get from Eddie.

Years later, you'd both just squeaked by to graduate, you never took your grades very seriously. You don't see the point of doing what everyone in life pushed on you. College, marriage, kids, the house with the white picket fence. It all seems so hollow, and you want no part in it. You instead choose to focus on Eddie. You play D&D with him regularly, and he recently decided to teach you how to play the guitar. Some days you just get high and listen to Metallica or Dio in his trailer. Any time you can spend by his side, you jump at the chance. You couldn't help falling in love with him, but you're sure he doesn't feel the same. He treats you like a sister, a best friend. He always picks other girls to go out with and screw. It's not like you aren't a catch, you've been with plenty of guys. But none of them make you feel the way Eddie does, so you’ve never formed a long-term relationship with any of them. You can barely remember their names, they don't matter to you at all.

It always hurts you to see Eddie with other girls, kissing and giggling with them. They sit in his lap after his shows, practically humping him on the couch in his trailer. It always makes you want to scream, or vomit. That should be you, not some whore who doesn't care about him. So you try your best to act unbothered, bringing your own dates to distract yourself. You eventually fuck them on the couch while Eddie takes whatever girl he brought home to his bed.

But the whole time you're having sex with someone else, you can hear what’s happening in his bedroom. It makes you want to burst into tears, but you just pretend you don't hear. Or worse, you pretend the random guy you’re with is Eddie instead. You always feel disgusted afterwards though, you're just using random men to fill a gaping hole inside your heart. Not only that, you don't even pretend to like them. They all have blank faces, no names to you. You fill in the blanks when it comes time to screw them, pasting Eddie where you want him most. But they never perform the way you imagine he would. They don't care about you, or your pleasure. Once they're done, they leave. You're left laying on the couch afterwards, hearing noises from the bedroom with your clothes still removed or undone. It's here that you always lose the battle with your tears, letting them out silently to make sure the lovebirds aren't disturbed. You eventually get yourself together, wiping your tears away before Eddie escorts his girl to the door.

"You okay?" He always asks after he lets his whore out, taking notice of your puffy eyes and streaky eyeliner.

"Yeah, I’m fine. Just another asshole." It isn't necessarily a lie, the guys you pick blindly usually don't treat you very well.

"Maybe you need to find someone you actually like, Y/N. You deserve to be happy." He kneels in front of you, wiping your eyes carefully. He looks into your eyes, and opens his mouth to say something. But he always closes it again, and shakes his head slightly. "Let me drive you home." And he always does, trying his best to cheer you up on the way. Telling jokes, blasting music, swerving the van playfully on the road. He does everything he can to get your tears to stop. It always works too, he shines so bright in your life. He makes everything better, any troubles you have melt away when you're with him. He parks and walks you to the door of your apartment like a true gentleman, telling you goodnight. You say the same, and burst into tears all over again when you close the door behind you and you're sure he won't hear. You cry so hard your chest hurts, and your throat is left raw from sobbing.

You eventually run out of tears for the night, crawling into bed with all your clothes still on, too tired to remove them. You lay in bed yearning for Eddie for hours, picturing what being his girlfriend could be like. It's oddly comforting, playing pretend in your head while you curl up in the blanket. You drift off to sleep with thoughts of the man you love swirling in your mind. And in the morning, the cycle starts again. Wake up, D&D/guitar lessons, van hangout, work, Eddie's show, back to his trailer, meaningless sex, crying, drive home, crying again, sleep. At some point this routine is sure to kill you, you can't keep going like this. You'll tell Eddie how you feel the next time you see him. And then you can either be with him, or put these pesky feelings behind you if he only sees you as a friend.

It's a Saturday afternoon, and you're getting ready to see Eddie. It's just the two of you today, you'll be going to Lover's Lake to hang out in his van. You both like the lake, not because of its name but because it's always peaceful there. The reflections of the surrounding woods on the water, birds flying overhead, a cool breeze brushing through the trees. It's nice and quiet, making you feel like it's just you and Eddie in the world. You're just about finished applying your smudgy eyeliner when you hear Eddie honking outside. You almost stab yourself with your eye pencil when the sound startles you. You toss it on your vanity, checking yourself over to make sure you look good. Your makeup is flawless, your outfit is badass as ever, and you don’t have a single hair out of place. You smile at your own reflection, eager to go with Eddie so you can tell him how you feel. You grab your bag, rushing out of your apartment and down the stairs. You run over to the van, yanking the passenger door open. You slide into your seat, tossing your bag in the back.

"Hey there, Y/N. How are you doing on this fine afternoon?" He smirks at you, looking you up and down. You seem extra put together today, he wonders if he's the reason for it. He pushes the thought from his head, there's no way you think of him like that.

"Hey, Eddie. I'm alright I guess." You say quietly, feeling his eyes on you. You look at him, meeting his wandering gaze. Did he just check me out?, you wonder. No way, he wouldn't do that.

"You 'guess'? That doesn't sound like the Y/N I know. Well, hopefully some time at the lake will brighten your mood, hm?" He puts his hand on your knee, rubbing it comfortingly. You tense at his touch, almost holding your breath. The skin where his hand is feels tingly with anticipation. "Seriously, though. Are you feeling okay? You've been kinda off lately." He's genuinely concerned about you, you've been acting weird around him recently. Whenever he touches you, it makes you all jumpy, and you've been crying a lot too. He hopes he hasn't upset you somehow, he truly cares for you. He likes you a lot, more than he'd readily admit. But he figures you only see him as a friend.

"I'm fine, Eddie. Let's just go to the lake, okay?" You reply, almost annoyed. You look out the window, waiting for him to start driving. Eddie sighs, taking his hand off your knee. He grips the steering wheel, and drives out of the parking lot. You both ride in silence on the way to the lake, but Eddie can't help looking over at you every so often. You refuse to meet his gaze, keeping your eyes focused on any sights outside the window as you ride past. Any enthusiasm or bravery you had about telling Eddie you love him is slipping away from your grasp.

Eddie continues to glance at you as he goes his usual route to the lake. Something is definitely off with you, he can see a sad expression on your face reflecting back at him in the window you keep staring out of. He doesn't know exactly why you seem so down, but he hopes you'll at least talk to him about it.

You finally reach the lake, and Eddie parks the van in your usual spot. He kills the engine, turning in his seat to face you. "So, are you gonna tell me what's going on, Y/N? Did I make you upset or something?" You turn to face him, looking into his eyes. His expression makes your heart break. He thinks he's hurt you, but it's been you hurting yourself because of how you feel about him.

"No, Eddie. You didn't do anything. I'm just being stupid, I promise." You reach forward to take his hands into yours. He lets you, and you stroke his rings, taking comfort in how the cool metal feels under your thumb. You want to keep talking, but it's like your mouth has been sewn shut.

"So what is it then? And I'm sure it's not stupid, Y/N. But you seem so sad lately, and you practically wince whenever I touch you. Just tell me what's wrong, darling. There's nothing you could say that would make me like you any less." He implores you to open up to him. He wants to help, however he can.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that, Eds." You manage to reply, and your gaze falls to your joined hands. Your heart is pounding in your chest, and your palms are sweating beyond belief. You feel sick, like you can't breathe. You can't do this. It'll ruin everything, and then Eddie won't want to see you anymore. You try to hold back, but your tears fight their way from your eyes, dripping onto the floor. Eddie's hands leave your grasp, grabbing the sides of your face to make you look at him again.

"Hey, hey. Y/N, please don't cry. Whatever it is, please just tell me. I can't stand seeing you so unhappy, princess." Seeing you like this makes his heart smash into a million pieces. He wants to make it better, but he doesn't even know what the problem is. You start to panic, your breaths come out fast and shallow. You start feeling dizzy, and you wish you could just run and hide. But you can't, Eddie won't let you go.

"I can't do this, Eddie. It'll ruin everything. And then you won't like me anymore. And I can't live with that." You choke the words out between sobs, your face turning a deep shade of scarlet. You're so embarrassed, and you just want to drop it. "Please, just forget it. We can pretend this never happened and I'll stop being an idiot. Please, I-" Eddie interrupts you by bringing his lips to yours. Your sobs stop, but your body still shudders a bit. You return the kiss, it's gentle and warm. A few more tears slide down your cheeks, and then Eddie breaks the kiss. He smiles at you, letting go of your face to hold your hands again.

"You know, if you were in love with me, all you had to do was say so." His smile grows wider when you gasp at his words. You open your mouth to protest, or put yourself down, but he places a finger over your lips to keep you quiet. "It's alright, darling. I promise you haven't ruined anything. I should've guessed this is why you've been acting so strange. I just didn't think you'd feel the same way about me as I do about you." Your eyes widen, you can't believe he's actually been in love with you this whole time.

You move his finger from your mouth, and grab his shirt collar. You pull him into you, smashing your lips together. He groans as you almost make him fall from his seat, but he hungrily reciprocates the kiss. He bites your bottom lip, making you moan. He slips his tongue in, and you battle for dominance. He wins out, frantically leading you to the back of the van. There's pillows and blankets thrown about, making a comfortable landing place for you. You fall onto your back, with Eddie on top of you. You finally break the kiss, stroking his face with the back of your hand. "You have no idea how many times I've wished for this, Eddie. I've loved you for so long, but I didn't think I could ever tell you. You always chose other girls over me."

"I know, and I was a fuckin' idiot. I only did that because I thought you didn't want me. We could've saved so much time, so much heartbreak. I can't begin to tell you how often I imagined those other girls were you instead." You laugh in shock at what he’s said. Him, fantasizing about you? You can't believe it. This whole time, he’s only wanted you. "That's not weird, is it?" He asks, blushes slightly at his little confession.

"Not at all, Eddie. If I'm being honest, I did the same thing with all those assholes I brought to the trailer. But I don't think they came even close to pleasing me like I imagine you could."

"Jesus, we're a couple of sick fucks, aren't we?" He chuckles, shaking his head.

"No. We were just painfully oblivious to each other's true feelings." You giggle, staring into his eyes. You wrap your arms around his neck, bringing him closer to you. Your lips meet again, slow and sensual this time. The temperature in the van begins to rise, you feel your blood boiling in your veins. Eddie's hands grip your waist, and his left knee goes between your legs. He's creating friction on your clothed core, causing you to moan. His lips leave yours, moving to your jaw, and your neck. He plants open-mouthed kisses on your skin, occasionally sucking the flesh to leave hickies on you. "Fuck, Eddie. You're really good at this." You sigh blissfully, letting every sensation wash over you.

"I should hope so, I've had plenty of practice." He says between kisses, smirking like an idiot. One of his hands leaves your waist to grope your tits through your shirt. You arch your back off the floor of the van, gasping at his touch. "You make such pretty noises, princess." He whispers in your ear. "I can't wait to hear what you sound like when you cum." His words make you so wet, and his knee grinding on you feels so good. Every move Eddie makes sets your insides on fire, intense waves of pleasure washing over you. He's got you so wound up, soaking through your panties. Not long now until he pushes you over the edge.

"If you keep going the way you are, it won't take much." You moan out, your hands tangling in his hair. You tug on it roughly, and he groans into your neck.

"Careful, Y/N. It's dangerous to push my buttons like that." He grins at you, pulling you to sit up. He places you on top of him, his thigh positioned between your legs. You're sitting on your knees, and Eddie grips your hips in his hands. "Ride my thigh, darling. I want you to make yourself cum for me." He says lowly, his eyes burning with lust as they gaze into yours. You do as he says, slowly moving your hips on him. Eddie keeps your pace steady, helping you into the right angle to hit the spot where you need him most. You place your hands on his shoulders for leverage, increasing your pace on him. He just sits there watching you closely, drinking in every moan and curse that falls from your lips.

The waves are crashing into you now, threatening to pull you under. You're sweating through your clothes, and your pussy is impossibly wet. "Fuck, Eddie. I'm so close." You moan loudly, digging your nails into his shoulders.

"Keep going, princess. Make a mess all over me. Let me hear those pretty moans." His words spur you on further, and you grind yourself on him as fast as you can. You're panting wildly, feeling wave after wave rolling into you. Eddie moves to bite down into your neck, which sends you falling over the edge.

"Oh, god!" You scream, your legs try to snap shut as stars fill your vision. Eddie holds you into his chest, keeping you upright as your orgasm rips through you. You keep gripping his shoulders, gasping for air as you ride out your high. You fall backwards after your body has calmed down. You just lay here like a starfish, trying to collect your thoughts. You're staring at the roof of the van, breathing heavily. Eddie lays down on his side next to you. His head is propped up with one hand, and the other slowly strokes your arm up and down.

"How are you feeling, love?" He asks, looking down at you with kind eyes.

"Good. Uh, great, actually." You say awkwardly, glancing at him briefly. "I've never done that before. Not…cum, I've done that plenty. I just mean, the whole...um, grinding on you thing. I didn't expect it to have such an effect on me." You can't help your cheeks burning. You feel silly, babbling words at Eddie like this.

"Relax, Y/N. You don't have to be embarrassed about anything with me, you know that." You look at him again, seeing genuine affection in his eyes. You nod, turning your body to face his. You get as close to him as you can, and he wraps his arms around you. You kiss him again, but it's much softer now. Your heart melts, and you pull him even closer. He breaks away, speaking quietly. "Do you want more, sweetheart?"

"Yes, please." You reply just as quietly. You're not sure why you're both being so quiet, but it feels right. This moment feels so intimate, and you never want it to end. You lay on your back again after removing your jacket. He takes his own off too, the climate inside the van is like a sauna.

"Take your shirt off for me, princess." You obey his command, tossing it away. Eddie's right hand immediately goes to massage one of your breasts over your bra, making you gasp. His eyes gaze over your body, almost in awe of how beautiful you look. After a moment of staring, he lifts your torso to reach behind you. He expertly unclasps your bra, pulling it off you with ease. His breath hitches when your tits are exposed for him, your nipples hardened from arousal. "You're so gorgeous, baby.'' You blush at his compliment, a small giggle escaping your lips. Eddie lowers his head to your chest, kissing the valley between your breasts. You moan, gripping his long locks again. He peppers wet kisses on every last inch of you, leaving no flesh untouched. From the curves of your tits, to your ribs underneath, his lips leave a scorching trail as he moves. Once he's satisfied with his work, he swirls his tongue around one of your nipples before taking it into his mouth.

"Eddie." You whimper as he worries his teeth on the sensitive bud. His hand gropes your other breast, squeezing it roughly. Once he's left you properly marked, Eddie repeats the same actions on the other side. You tug on his hair again, making him groan. You love hearing the effect you have on him, most guys are too shy to make noises. But Eddie isn't most guys, especially when he's around you. You tug again harder, and he moans even louder. He stops kissing your chest, looking at you. His eyes are dark, swirling with pure lust.

"You love playing with danger, don't you, princess?" He flashes you a devilish grin.

"Maybe." You smile back at him. "But I love the noises you make when I touch you even more. Guys don't really do that, but it's so fucking hot."

"Is that so?" He asks, you just nod at him. "I'll keep that in mind, darling." He sits up to remove his shirt, and you can't help gawking at his body. He's toned, but slender, and his tattoos look so good on him. You get on your knees to feel him up. You run your hands up and down his chest, feeling as much of him as you can. "You like what you see, love?" He asks quietly. You look into his eyes, feeling passion overtake you. You grab him by the shoulders, and push him over as you bring your lips onto his in a bruising kiss. He grunts as he falls, grabbing your waist to take you with him. You straddle him when he lands, grinding yourself onto his stiffening cock. He groans into your mouth, gripping your hips roughly. "What's gotten into you, Y/N? You're so needy." Eddie chuckles as he breaks the kiss to take a breath.

"You'll see, Eds. Just lay down and relax." You grin slyly at him. He cocks an eyebrow, unsure of what you mean. You proceed to lick a long stripe from his collarbone to his jaw. You look at him again, grinning like a Cheshire cat. He just stares at you, wide-eyed. He's panting, awaiting your next move. You feel his dick growing even harder beneath you. You take that as a sign to keep going. You lean back down to his neck, biting down hard this time, then sucking the skin to make a dark bruise.

"Jesus, fuck." He moans out, spurring you on. You nibble his skin, trailing down his neck, to his chest, his stomach. Each move you take elicits whimpers and curses from Eddie's lips. Every sound is music to your ears, making you more and more wet whenever you hear one. You reach his belt, looking over your handiwork. Eddie's body is littered with teeth marks, and he's breathing heavily. You undo his belt, taking your time in order to tease him. Once it's open you unzip his jeans, pulling them down as Eddie kicks off his shoes. He's left in his boxers now, and a tent has formed in the thin fabric. You grip his waistband and yank his boxers down. His dick springs free, slapping his stomach before standing up straight.

You take his length in your hand, stroking him gently. He groans again, sweat beginning to form on his brow. He looks at you with pleading eyes. "You're very sexy when you're desperate, baby." Eddie's completely fucked for you, silently begging you to put him in your mouth. You happily oblige him, taking every last inch of him at once. You gag slightly when he hits the back of your throat, but you're persistent about keeping as much of him in as possible. You bob your head up and down, twirling your tongue around him as you go. He's constantly letting out lewd noises, which only serve to fuel your fire.

"Keep going, babe. But can you put your pussy towards me?" He asks, barely getting the words out. You position yourself where he wants you, and he makes frantic work of taking off your shoes and remaining clothes. You moan on Eddie's cock as you feel him stroking your slick folds. "You're so wet, darling. Is this all for me?" He asks as he slips two fingers into your cunt.

All you can manage to reply with is a muffled 'mmhmm' as he starts curling his digits inside you. Each stroke of Eddie's fingers makes you see stars, causing you to moan on him again and again. This in turn makes him groan and pick up his pace while fingering you. You feel Eddie's balls tightening, he's getting close. You speed up, working him harder and faster, gagging on him repeatedly. He takes this as a challenge to give you another orgasm, so he takes his fingers out of you, replacing them with his tongue. You scream on his length, feeling a fire beginning to build in your belly. His mouth licks and sucks on your clit mercilessly, pouring gasoline on the flames.

You're both driving each other mad as you compete to send the other over the edge. Moans fill the van as you near your highs, each lick and stroke pushing you further and further. Eddie's release comes first, and his mouth temporarily leaves your dripping cunt to moan your name as he cums down your throat. Once you've swallowed every drop, he sucks your clit into his mouth to make you topple over the edge. You scream his name as your legs begin to shake. Your orgasm rips through your body viciously, and you feel yourself cum onto Eddie's face. He holds you steady until your high subsides, licking up all your juices in the meantime.

You collapse onto him, practically gasping for air. You lay on your stomach for a moment, waiting for your vision to clear. Eddie strokes the backs of your legs affectionately. "You alive over there, Y/N?" He asks playfully.

"Yeah, just...wow. You're so fucking good at that." You sit up, back still facing him. His arms wrap around you from behind, his legs on either side of you. He kisses your shoulder, and your neck. His lips feel warm and soft against your skin, and you're already wanting more. You sigh as you cock your head to the side to give Eddie more access. He licks the length of your neck, stopping below your jaw. "Everything you do feels so good, Eddie." You sigh lustfully. You turn slightly to face him, looking at him from under your lashes. "Do you want to fuck me now?" You ask, biting your lip.

"Sure thing, dollface. Can you get on your hands and knees for me?" You nod silently, doing as he says. He kneels behind you, gently pressing you downwards. He leaves you resting on your elbows with your ass in the air. He grips his cock, brushing it between your soaked folds, drawing low moans from both of you. He teases you like this for a moment, eager to have you beg him to fuck you. You're so turned on it almost hurts, you need him inside you now.

"Eddie, please stop teasing. I need your dick inside me." You practically whine for him. He chuckles darkly at your pleading.

"Your wish is my command, princess." He says as he slams his cock into you.

"Oh, fuck!" You cry out as he hits your g spot perfectly.

"God, you're so wet and tight for me. Fuckin’ gorgeous." He pants, and he begins to thrust in and out of you. You moan continuously, he hammers your sweet spot with each thrust. He smacks your ass, making you yell.

"Fuck, Eddie!" You grip the scattered blankets beneath you for dear life, spots hinder your vision as you're fucked into next week. The sound of your vulgar noises and slapping skin is all you can hear, and it's like the most beautiful music in the world. You're loving every second of this, as is Eddie. But there's something else you crave from him. You don't just want Eddie to fuck you, you want him to do filthy things to you. "Babe, do you mind choking me while you fuck me?" You ask him as he continues to pound into your cunt.

He's taken aback by your request. Not because he's not into it, he definitely is. He's just surprised you want him to do that to you. But he finds your desires to be ridiculously sexy, and who is he to deny you? "Of course, darling. Anything you want." You can hear the smirk in his voice as his ringed hand comes forward, pulling you up by the shoulder. He lays on your back slightly so he can reach your throat. You feel the cool metal that adorns his fingers wrap around your neck, squeezing lightly. You choke out a moan as the pressure makes your head lighten. He loosens his grip for a moment as he continues to fuck you.

"Fuck, you're so hot, Eddie. Keep going. Fuck me, choke me, make me cum, please." You keep moaning and begging for Eddie to have his way with you, and he can't help but give you anything you ask for.

"You're such a dirty girl, Y/N. I fuckin’ love it." His grip on your throat tightens again, and he snaps his hips even harder into you. You're both slicked in sweat, struggling to keep your positions. You're nearing the end again, and you can already tell it's going to be the most intense orgasm you've ever had. Your skin is on fire, your insides like burning coals. Every feeling is amplified, concentrated in your pussy. Every time Eddie's cock enters you, it's like fireworks being set off.

Every curse and dirty request you let out makes Eddie's dick twitch. He can't believe how beautiful and sexy you are like this. He's genuinely in love with you, and his heart pounds in his chest as he races to the finish line. His free hand slithers down between your legs to your clit, rubbing quick circles. You gasp loudly, and his ringed hand tightens around your throat. He uses his arm to hold you in place, rubbing and fucking and choking you simultaneously. Eddie mentally congratulates himself on pulling off such a feat, but maintains focus on making you cum. "I'm so close, babe. Keep going, just like that." You say once his grip loosens again.

"I'm almost there too, princess. Be a good girl and cum for me." He pinches your clit between his fingers, sending you toppling over the edge.

"Eddie! Oh, fuck!" You scream so loud, and you feel your pussy clamp onto Eddie's dick. He groans, feeling his own high take over. He continues to hold you as your legs tremble violently, and juices spurt out of you onto the blankets.

"Jesus, Y/N!" He moans as your walls clench him. He feels your cum rush over his cock, spilling out of you. It feels unbelievable, he's never experienced anything like it. His load empties into you, mixing with your release as his hips buck compulsively a few times. Once Eddie regains composure, he pulls out of you. You whine at the loss, and your combined arousal slowly drips out of you. Eddie stares at the sight for a moment, before wiping it up with his finger. You moan at the overstimulation, and lay on your stomach as you cool down. Eddie lays beside you, trying to get your attention. You turn to him, seeing the gathered cum still on his finger. He brings it to your lips, and you immediately take it in your mouth. You suck it clean, moaning at the sweet taste. "Shit, could you be any hotter, Y/N?"

You just shrug and lean over to kiss him. He melts into you, caressing your cheek. The kiss feels different this time. It's slow and tender, full of love. You eventually break away, and you both lay down again. You place your head on his chest, and he wraps his arms around you. Your leg lays over Eddie’s as you try to be as close to him as possible. Your hand strokes his chest while he plays with your hair. "I love you, Eddie. I'm so glad I met you." You say, barely above a whisper.

"I love you too, Y/N. I don't think I've ever loved anyone like this before." He replies at the same volume. He pulls one of the blankets over the both of you, snuggling into you even more. You can't help but let your eyes flutter closed. You're so content like this. Your heart swells as Eddie's words echo in your mind as you drift off to sleep. He loves you, and you love him. Nothing could ruin this moment. The world could end and you wouldn't care, as long as you get to stay like this with Eddie.

The end.

[lover-of-mine]

I have realized what is making my head explode when a BT post accidentally goes through my tags!!!! They are completely ignoring Buck is bi. They are acting like my aunt in the early 2000s. I may not have been fond of all the LUs but they were valid relationships. If Taylor had not fucked up who knows where that relationship would have gone. I mean clearly nowhere once Eddie was out because once Eddie broke up with him he spiraled and kissed Lucy. But they are still valid relationships and at this point in time I don't see how Tommy is better than any of them. To be honest he has the worst traits of Abby and Taylor but the screen time of Ally. So frustrating.

Well, when have people ever been normal about bisexuality? But here's the thing, every relationship Buck had so far had his own set of issues that somehow have been reduced to the way he was dating women, which is fucked in so many ways and the amount of times I have to stop myself from picking a fight because of bucktaylor it's actually hysterical to me because we're seriously at a point where I need to defend the validity of Taylor's place in Buck's life. Like, how did we get here? Because here's the thing, do I think Buck and Taylor were meant to be? No. Do I think Buck would've clung to her until he literally couldn't anymore if her actions hadn't hurt his family? Absolutely. I see Buck going as far as panic proposing to her if that particular situation hadn't happened, just to have someone. Because they had chemistry and Buck kept trying to force that to become love. Taylor was wrong for Buck for a multitude of reasons, but none of those reasons were because she's a woman and Buck is gay. And the relationship with Tommy is not gonna magically last forever just because Tommy is a man. Tommy is this weird amalgamation of all of Buck's love interests with Ali/Ana levels of screentime and he doesn't magically have a fighting chance just because he has a dick and people can't seem to see this. And I think that's crazy. Because Tommy was given to us in an episode that had the theme of not recognizing people, while actively making us think it was about someone else and then they did the Kim storyline and I want to scream because people can't see the parallels. And the more I look at it the more insane I get because he's all of Buck's love interests smashed into someone who's Eddie two steps to the left with none of the things we love about him. But somehow he's perfect because he's not a woman. The only thing Tommy has going for him is not being a woman. You turn him into one and none of the things he did would fly. Letting Buck get away with physically hurting Eddie? Leaving him in the curb? Not dressing up? Making a kink joke after someone Buck loves almost died? Picture those scenes with Lucy and tell me anyone in the fandom would be shipping them. Let alone fighting for them the way people are right now. But he's a man so he gets a pass and that's so fucking weird. Evan Buckley is bisexual but getting dicked down isn't going to magically make everything perfect. Jesus.

Also, since you mentioned Eddie coming out, something that I've been thinking about since we found out it was supposed to be Eddie, a Buck who thinks he's straight finding out Eddie has a boyfriend would shortcircuit. I legit think they could not find a way to write Buck's reaction to Eddie being queer that didn't end with him figuring his feelings out so they switched things up, so Buck would for sure would've gotten there once Eddie got there because he would've had big feelings about it and Buck is not the repressed one.

[ewanmitchellcrumbs]

I’ve been thinking… Do you show Aemond would absolutely prevent unwanted pregnancies from happening if he were to have casual sexual encounters before marriage? Like he would make sure them drink the moon tea on time? Tho I personally feel like he wouldn’t be the type to aegon around before marriage, if he were to be intimate with someone he would be super committed and prepared for anything that come along.

Damn, @targaryenrealnessdarling ‘s Consequences wrecked me officially lol (I love love fanon Aemond from you guys’ amazing work❤️, I just feel like show Aemond would be more like, a decent and real dutiful man.

(If he got the chance to live I do believe he would absolutely raise Alys’ child with him and legitimize their relationship

Going off of what I know of Aemond from having read the book, and the direction I know Ewan wants to take with the character on the show, Aemond isn't a puritanical virgin. He fucks around, he just doesn't take what isn't given freely, unlike his brother. He's a man, he has urges. If a maidservant or visiting noble lady expresses an interest then he will absolutely dick them down. There's no way he'd have the swagger to pull off necking all four Baratheon girls in a day, or keep an enchantress like Alys satisfied if he had all the gear and no idea.

Aemond is careful and knowledgeable where Aegon isn't. He keeps his conquests on the DL, and he knows that they need to drink moon tea after, and will likely want to watch them do it to ensure they do. His hatred of bastards is too deeply rooted to leave anything to chance.

I'm in two minds regarding how he'd have been with Alys' kid - part of me thinks it's awfully suspect that he entered into a battle where he knew he was likely to die, shortly after knocking her up. It's the Medieval equivalent of popping out for a packet of cigarettes and never coming back lol

Liz's portrayal of Aemond in Consequences is so good - I love when Aemond is horrible (he is a massive dick in the books, but he's been amped up to 11 in her fic and it's amazing)

[tarabyte3]

I Want You to Show Me Weak

Fandom: Andor

Pairing: Kino Loy/F!Reader

Chapter 3/27 (2.7k words)

->start at chapter 1<-

<- Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 ->

Summary: You're pretty sure Kino Loy hates you. He screams at you, grabs you, and shoves you against the wall, and it's becoming a problem because, well...it shouldn't fluster you as much as it does.

Warnings: Explicit rating, Smut, Prison, Prison sex, minor non-graphic injuries, Dom/Sub, sexual tension, dirty talk, praise, hair-pulling, light choking, unprotected sex, oral, angst

A/N: If you wanted Dom Kino on top of dirty talk Kino, boy do I have some good news for you 😌 Work title is from "Poison" by Vaults. Chapter title is from "Wicked Game" by Chris Isaak.

AO3 Link

Chapter 3 - What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you

During your shift the next day, your hand hurts, but it's functional. It does slow you down, though, because you can't move it as well as you usually do. Alis is kind enough to help you out since he was already faster than you before you injured yourself. Now he's doing his job and nearly half of yours. You owe him big time.

But Kino's "not officially" comment is still rattling around in your skull. You're new enough that maybe you've missed something. So you ask your table if there are any unofficial rules you should know about. If anyone has more context for whatever the fuck yesterday was, outside of the whole…incident, it will be them. Because so far, the only actual rules you've been given are to do your work, keep up, don't get fried, and don't cause problems. If you do cause problems, take them to Kino. "Problems" appears to be the key word there. Covers all manner of sins.

Threl seems relieved that it sounds like you're trying to make an effort to stay out of trouble, bless his heart. He gives you a whole list of shower and tool etiquette, a lecture on respecting communal and private spaces like the cells, and what not to do during quiet hours. Which all seem like basic common sense to you because you know all of that already. You do all of it. But he says nothing about sex, possibly because he doesn't want to bring up sex to the only woman in the unit. Or the rules don't exist.

"What about fooling around?"

Jevid leans forward so he can be heard over the noise on the floor and his large belly presses against the table. "You really think Kino lets people get away with rough housing at all? You should know that better than anyone with how often you get your ass chewed."

"Once for rough housing, if I recall." Alis grins.

"Oh my god, you've all been in here far too long. No, I mean what about sex?"

They all stop, hands hovering over tools and parts, and turn almost as a group to look at you. There's an equal mix of confusion from the three younger men and concern from the three older men staring at you from around the table.

"What?? Why are you all staring at me?"

"What about it?" Alis asks with a furrowed brow, as if your question doesn't make any sense. "Sex is a pretty big topic, you're gonna want to narrow that down for us."

"Are there any rules about sex?"

They all glance around at each other, as though someone in the pod has the answers and will explain what is happening to the rest of them. Jevid clicks his tongue thoughtfully in the empty space where a tooth should be.

"Jeez, you guys are acting like I just mentioned the rancor in the room."

"That's because no one talks about it, duh." Taybus rolls his eyes at you. "You think we all walk around talking about how much we're getting laid? Or that we're getting laid at all?"

"Okay fine, how about this. Are there any rules forbidding sex? Because I'm one woman in here with forty nine men. I think my chances are a little better than yours."

"Oh my god." Sorrek sounds like someone is strangling him.

"Fine, forty eight. Happy?"

"No," Sorrek whimpers.

"Forty seven, sorry kid. Don't swing that way," Threl laughs.

You look at him in pleasant surprise. "Yeah? Well damn, Threl. Then you and I both have forty seven more chances than these fools."

"Forty six," Jevid grumbles. "I'm way too old for this bullshit."

"Fair enough, Jev." You glance at Taybus and grimace. "Let's just cut it down to forty five."

"Oh, fuck you!" He attempts to look angry, but he's trying not to laugh.

Alis, however, is fully shaking with laughter as he slides a part into place. "Woman, if you can find a way to have sex in here or get any privacy, then be my guest. Good for you, in fact. I got your high-five right here." He holds up his hand. "Most of us just…take care of it ourselves." He then waves his still raised hand around. Sorrek protests next to him. His face and ears have been turning dangerously red the entire conversation.

"Oh, and I don't?" You smirk. There is a mixture of groans and snorts in response, except Sorrek, who finally puts his head into his hands.

"But no," Alis adds, "there's no rules or anything. Just be respectful and don't get caught, you know?"

"Why, you see someone you fancy?" Taybus wags his eyebrows at you suggestively.

You have to fight not to glance over and look for Kino, and you tell yourself it's just because that weird interaction in the locker room is what led to this conversation. Not because you're attracted to him. Definitely not that.

"In this lot?" You snort. "Hardly."

"Why else would you be asking?" Taybus is grinning at you now, like he's caught on to something interesting. "You totally do. Who is it?!"

"That's enough," Threl sighs. "Did we not learn any lessons from yesterday? Let's focus."

Taybus ignores him. "It's Vage at table 1, isn't it? I saw him checking you out once."

"Nope. Don't worry, I won't steal your boyfriend." You wink at him.

Taybus flips you off from across the table. You go to return the rude gesture, when there's a hand on your shoulder. You jump and turn to see Kino standing next to you. He has a fake smile on his face. The kind he gets when he's pissed, but he wants to make a point first.

"I see we're all taking our jobs very seriously over here at table 7 today. So seriously that you're in," he pauses to check his data pad and several men at the table wince, "last place! Which puts our shift in fifth. So I have to wonder what is more fascinating than work?"

You start to say "nothing," but to your horror, Taybus butts in with, "She's got a boyfriend."

The panic washes over you and you sputter, "No I don't!' You glance at Kino in fear, but he just gives you an intrigued stare. If you didn't know any better, you'd think he's amused, even. "He's just kidding." And you don't know why you feel it's so important Kino knows that. The man could probably not care less. He does hate you, after all.

"But you asked about sex." Taybus continues, knowing damn well he should shut his mouth, but is unable to resist the opportunity to distress you further. Probably as payback for excluding him from the list. You feel your face burning with embarrassment. You suddenly wish the ground would open up, swallow you whole, and spit you out into the ocean.

"No! I didn't!" Even though you absolutely did. You just don't want Kino to know you're sniffing around after what he said to you. What will he think? Probably that you're trying to find a new way to piss him off. But he's been standing there the entire time, watching your face. Intently taking in every flash of horror and mortification.

Threl uncomfortably clears his throat.

"Enough," Kino finally growls out to the table. "Your numbers better be up by the time I come back around, got it?"

There is an off beat chorus of "Yes, Kino." He turns to look directly at you, waiting expectantly.

You squirm, and give a belated, low, "Yes, Kino."

"Good." There's a slight, pleased twitch in his eyebrow as he stares you down. He looks back around the table. "Unless you're looking forward to frying in ten hours, get to work!"

He finally removes his hand from your shoulder and stalks off. You hadn't realized it had been there the whole time. You glance at the spot he touched you without thinking about what you're doing because, now that it's gone, you can feel his absence and the thought makes your chest flutter.

"Way to go, you pissed him off again."

You quickly look up at the table, like you've been caught doing something you aren't supposed to. "Shut the fuck up, Taybus, and hand me the wrench or I swear to every god that will listen that I will smother you in the shower."

"And you'd deserve it, too." Alis says next to you. "Man, what's wrong with you? Bringing up her sex life to Kino? No wonder you aren't getting laid." The two begin to bicker as you all get back to work.

Jevid gives an annoyed grunt and checks his panel. However, you notice Threl and Sorrek eyeing you suspiciously. And you really hope they aren't going to corner you and bring this up again later.

They absolutely corner you and bring it up again later.

"You wanna tell me what that was about?" Threl crosses his arms and Sorrek looks apologetic next to him, but doesn't move. You're blocked in by the dads.

"Not really." You huff. "It's not your business and I'm far too old for the talk, guys! Come on." You give them a pleading look, hoping they'll drop it.

"It's my business if you get yourself in trouble again! They're gonna kick your ass out to some place worse than this if you keep it up." Threl sounds angry, and you feel bad that you somehow managed to stress him out this much.

"We're just worried about you. That's all this is." Sorrek gives you a kind smile. Aha, you think, the good dad, bad dad routine. You're annoyed that it's working.

"I know you are." You can't help but smile back at him, damnit. "Honestly, guys, there's nothing to worry about. Yesterday when he was patching me up, Kino asked about how I was doing and if…and if anyone had been…inappropriate to me." You wince a little because you didn't want Kino's name to be connected to this conversation at all, just in case one of them was too perceptive for their own good. "It just got me thinking. I wasn't sure what the expectations are about that stuff. Figured I may as well find out. Just in case…you know." Sorrek suddenly finds the ceiling very interesting because he can no longer meet your eyes. "That's all there is to it. Promise."

"So there isn't anyone…?" Threl trails off, letting the question hang between you.

"No. I have no prospects. There's no one throwing themselves at the pariah."

Threl's posture relaxes and he shakes his head. "Okay. Fair enough. Just be careful." Then he surprises you by giving you a mischievous grin. "I think you'd be surprised if you actually paid attention. But good luck, I've been trying to get some in here for years."

At that, Sorrek finally excuses himself with a scandalized look. You let him go and quickly turn on Threl for more details because you haven't gotten the chance to talk about it yet. The two of you gossip about who is hot or not in the corner until it's time to line up. You specifically don't mention how weird things with Kino are getting because you don't think he can handle that yet. And you aren't even sure what the fuck is going on or if you can handle it yet.

When you catch Threl and Kino talking the next day after shift, you swear it isn't on purpose. You're heading out from the showers and you overhear Threl's unmistakable deep voice from around the corner, which catches your attention. The voice that answers him is gruff and low. You'd also recognize that voice anywhere. Especially when it's saying your name. So you stop by the doorway and listen.

"Just promise me you didn't chew her ass out afterwards," Threl pleads. He sounds tired, like they've had this conversation before.

"I promise I didn't yell at her," Kino sighs, and you can feel his irritation from there. "Not that she didn't deserve it."

"You don't have to tell me. I don't know how she keeps shoving her foot in her mouth, but she's a good kid—"

"She's an adult, Threl. You're not that much older than her—"

"—and she's good at the job." Threl ignores him and pushes on. "You and I know it's more than just the work, too. It's how you work. She keeps up with Taybus and keeps him in line, and you know how hard that used to be." Kino grunts in response and you smirk at the floor. Because you'd really love to rub Taybus's face in that. "Edii loves having her there." Okay, at that you're a little surprised because you didn't think Edii has ever expressed a like or dislike for anything other than Taybus. "He's almost relaxed, Kino. He smiles now. Not often, but I know you can see the difference—"

"Yeah, I see it," Kino growls.

"—Hell, I really like her, she gets along great with Alis and Jevid, and Sorrek adores her."

There's a pause in their conversation where you begin to reflect on everything Threl just said because you hadn't thought of yourself as good for your table at all. You can be obnoxious and disruptive, and you keep getting in trouble. You don't know how any of them manage to like you despite that. Then Kino's voice pulls you from your thoughts.

"You're not telling me anything I don't already know. She could get by in here just fine if she would just think before she speaks. Or acts, apparently." You can tell he's annoyed. Which annoys you, even though you can't really blame him.

"I know she's a lot. But she isn't going to learn just because you yell at her."

"I've already figured that out, too," he huffs.

"You have, huh?" You can hear the smile in Threl's tone.

"I know what she needs." There's a confidence to that simple statement that sends a rush through you. Because what the fuck does that mean?

"What does that mean?" Threl warily echoes your unvoiced question.

"Nothing. Look, I just need you to trust me." That is the closest to begging you've ever heard Kino Loy get. "Especially when it comes to her."

You really wish you could see their faces right now. Especially Kino's because your brain is in overdrive trying to work through his words like it's a code or puzzle. Why does he have to be so mysterious and unreadable all of the time?

"Alright. I trust you, Kino. You know I do."

"Good. Now I have to go do a sweep of the showers. I'll see you later."

You jump up in panic and scramble to get away from the doorway. You can't imagine how pissed Kino will be if he catches you eavesdropping. It isn't until you're trying to act natural, and Kino is turning the corner, that you realize you were so focused on not getting caught that you forgot you're only in a towel. He stops the second he sees you and stares at you in surprise. You stare back at him.

"Hi!" You wince because there was way too much enthusiasm in your voice. So much for acting natural.

He doesn't respond. But his eyes drop away from your face and slowly glance over your towel wrapped body. It's slow enough that it's obvious what he's doing. It's slow enough that you feel like he's absorbing every inch of you. Memorizing you. And you let him because it never occurs to you that you can stop him or leave. That you have any other choice but to let him.

Because maybe you want him to.

Because maybe, if you were a braver woman, you would remove your towel and let him look even more and see if you can crack his stony expression. Or beckon him to you and let him remove it himself.

"Are you done in here?" His indifferent voice snaps you out of your thoughts. You're disturbed because where the fuck did that come from? Also, how is he so unaffected? He checked you out and now he's just, what, standing there like nothing happened?

Maybe he didn't see anything he likes, you think. And why does that thought bother you so much?

"Yeah, sorry." You hunch in on yourself, holding your towel to your chest, and you run out, giving him a wide berth. You know with absolute certainty that you're not actually leaving, but are, in fact, running away.

NEXT CHAPTER->

[worriedvision]

Pls pls can I have jealous tighnari headcannons I just love that man so much and I finally got him yesterday! If ur too busy or if the requests close by the time u see this, it’s ok you don’t have to write it :) best wishes ( I love ur works btw)

Gender neutral reader, this will also have a jealousy fic at the end of it!

-

+Tighnari wasn't one to pursue romance, preferring to keep his focus purely on the forest. It's why he never confessed to you.

+It's also how you think he doesn't like you back, and you don't actually realise he's jealous.

+Definitely wants to prove to you that the person he's jealous of isn't the best, but he does this safely. He won't put them into a dangerous position where there's a good chance that they would die, but he makes sure it's embarassing enough for you to lose interest.

+You asked him once why he assigned the task to you and the new guy who has been hardcore flirting with you, as the guy had no experience with withering zones.

+Tighnari always convinces you that he genuinely believed the person to be better than what they were at the task.

+However, he remembers the time one guy almost won you over with his subtle arrogance.

--

You had been trying to move on from your feelings for Tighnari, and along comes this man. He wasn't Tighnari, you knew that, but he still was pleasing to the eye. When he approaches you personally, spending all his time with you, you give him a chance. Tighnari notices your lack of presence with him, and he gets worried when you don't show for your usual lunchtime.

He finally finds you, eating lunch with another man.

He knew he had no right to be so jealous of this person shamelessly complimenting you, an enticing grin appearing whenever you look away bashfully. He also knows he's going to do something he'll regret later on if he keeps watching, so he walks away.

The next day, you find out you're assigned to go with your new partner and potential love interest to clear out a withering zone. You don't notice the fearful glint that shows in his eyes when you turn around, beginning to run towards the area you were assigned to clear it out quickly.

Arriving with your partner in tow, you see him visibly shaken.

"You alright?" You ask, your partner laughing it off and coming up with an excuse before walking in without assessing the area. You spot a wolf of the rift, and your heart sinks. "Careful!" You shoot an arrow, hitting the enemy. Hearing rapid footsteps running away, you turn around to see what happened.

There he was, sprinting away without yelling aly reassurance he was going to bring reinforcements. Letting out a shaky sigh, you start to clear out the area.

+

Tighnari spots your partner running back home, pale out of horror, and he realises this man was even more of a coward than what he believed. Not even stopping to question where you were, Tighnari runs past the man who didn't seem to care.

Arriving at the withering zone, he realises you've somehow successfully cleared out the zone, but you were not conscious. Running over, he checks your vitals, letting a sigh of relief out when he realises you've just overexerted yourself. He couldn't blame you, given your less than ideal partner.

He carries you back, placing you in bed and opting to sit by your side until you woke up. He knew that if there was an emergency, the forest rangers knew to call for him.

Looking at your resting form, Tighnari realises he can't keep denying his feelings.

[mayasdeluca]

For me Betos is good but I think she has a big mouth and doesn't show it on the field. Like I know Gotham is the crappies team but I think that she can do better and save some of the goals....and our offensive can't score to save their lives. Maybe we should said we will kick a puppie/kittie for each shoot they misses

Yeah I don't really see her directing the defense often, except when she's doing goal kicks. My issue with her is that she comes off her line a lot and if you're going to do that you need to make sure you're going to save the ball 100% and with her you just never know. Even the first goal today, why the hell are you out so far when you're not even close to getting the ball? Then Ali makes a great initial block/save but then no one is anywhere close and Betos is too far out so the Spirit player gets the rebound and can shoot at an empty net. Those things shouldn't happen. She makes some good saves but also some bad mistakes so I just feel like she's an average GK and that's it. Our forwards are definitely biggest problem though, I mean if they get even 2 of the several good chances they had then the game is tied and they finally end the losing streak at least but no, they can't get the ball in the net to save their life. It's so bad. And most of the team has just given up, you can tell. Midge doesn't care, Kristie doesn't care, Paige & Ify just aren't good...I feel like Ali, Dorsey and Estelle are the only ones actually putting in effort and that's why the defense has actually been doing well but they have nothing to show for it because their GK makes wacky decisions and the midfield is asleep and their forwards can't score.

[punkscowardschampions]

Bea & Ro

Bea: What time were you planning to go to mass on your birthday? Ro: [a time that is ridiculously early af] Ro: You're going to be there to present me with my rosary right? Bea: I thought it was just before the party, when is that starting? Ro: Traditionally, yes, but I don't want to hurry through it as if it's not important Ro: [a time for when the party is starting] Bea: Right Bea: it's just that it was going to be a struggle to get back for the party as is Bea: That's essentially adding an extra day to my stay Ro: but you're the closest thing to a godparent I have, spiritually Ro: I don't know who else could do it Bea: and I know that you really want to do this Bea: I'm just not sure if I can make this happen, the schedule doesn't have much wriggle room Ro: okay, I suppose you can lead the last doll ceremony at the party instead Ro: I was intending to have Ali give it to me, since she made the outfits and everything but I'm sure she'll understand Bea: I don't mind if Ali does it Bea: it isn't as if this is actually traditional to us Ro: I'm trying to create my own traditions, it means something to me in that sense Bea: I'll try to make the party Bea: Yes, I know Bea: but I can't have my life revolve around it for a full calendar week Ro: I can't help when in the calendar my birthday falls in relation to your university terms Bea: Of course not but this is a lot, Ro Ro: No, it isn't Ro: it's a party that you'll try to attend Bea: I don't know of any other party you have to attend church to go to Bea: unless it's a wedding Ro: I haven't thrown any other parties prior to this Bea: You know what I mean Bea: this doesn't need to be such an event, does it Ro: It's my birthday, it's allowed to be whatever I want it to be Bea: Right Bea: well I don't know if I can come, alright Ro: well, if you want me to tell you that's fine, I won't, because it isn't Bea: What do you want me to do? Bea: The workload is insane Ro: if you are unable to cope with it approximately a month after Christmas break, what would you like me to say or do? Ro: *before Bea: Don't talk like you have any idea about the workload, firstly, that's what you can do Bea: You haven't even done your leavers yet Ro: You only just got back, that's common knowledge Ro: being snowed under is a poor excuse Bea: They set the assignments at the start of term Bea: even if I have all term to do it, would you suggest I leave it to the last minute? Ro: I would suggest you learn more effective time management some time before you graduate Ro: since you asked Bea: Please Bea: You're in a strop but don't be a brat about it Ro: you're well aware of when I was born, it's nobody's fault but your own if you can't handle your own schedule to coincide with long established party plans Bea: I'm aware it's in the middle of term, Ro Bea: and I go to school in another country and am living on student loans Bea: I'm not flying back for every little thing Ro: it's one of the shortest possible plane rides and you're more than happy to take advantage of that when it suits you Ro: or Fraze Bea: That's my business Bea: and I don't come back as much as you're trying to put on Ro: and I don't ask you to come back ever, or for anything Bea: It's clear you're only concerned about yourself Ro: for one day a year, why is that so uncalled for? Bea: Because, all this is just ridiculous Bea: you aren't Latina Ro: look for the ridiculous in anything and you will find it Ro: or if you prefer, all great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning Bea: You do it with Ali, as per Bea: you don't need me for any of this Ro: that's just as well since you can't be relied upon to take part in any of this Bea: If it was important, I'd be there Ro: it is important to me Bea: I can't say you've inspired me to make any greater attempts than I already have Ro: of course not, your mind was already made up when this conversation began Ro: however inspiring I am or am not is irrelevant because of your unwillingness to prioritise me regardless Bea: You seem pretty convinced of a few things yourself Bea: It isn't exactly the easiest time for me, regardless of my time management Ro: it's my 15th birthday that approaches, not my 5th, I'm utterly convinced that waiting at the window for you is an empty pursuit Bea: You're being dramatic Bea: and if you'd like to compare 5th birthdays with me, feel free Ro: and yet I'm the one who's supposedly being dramatic Ro: one great sacrifice and you're content to never consider making another in my honour, however big or small Ro: okay then Bea: I didn't sacrifice anything for you Bea: They died, there's no good behind us Bea: I got help, we got out of there, end of Ro: maybe that's the end of the story as far as you're concerned Ro: it's the beginning of mine Bea: We aren't even talking about that Bea: yet another topic you know nothing about and I'm not willing to endure lectures on Ro: they died on the same day, it's impossible to talk about one without the other Ro: if I were being dramatic, that would be cause enough Bea: What does it matter? Bea: Can you remember it? No Ro: that in itself matters, having nothing to remember them by except you and your memories which you're as unwilling to share with me as you are to make any time to celebrate with me now Bea: I was 4, I don't have any memories either Bea: That's how it is, there is nothing to celebrate there Ro: Fine Ro: I'll leave you to your assignments then Bea: I will send your present Ro: Thank you Bea: Right Bea: if anyone asks, tell them what you like Ro: it's unlikely anyone will given how selfish I'm apparently being and how air tight your reasons for not showing up supposedly are Ro: besides, I have enough to do without indulging in any games of chinese whispers as to your whereabouts Bea: Then you best get on with it Ro: I have my own schedule under control Bea: I've not got the time to have this petty back and forth with you and if you're as busy as you say, that shouldn't be a problem Ro: finally, something you're right about Ro: it isn't a problem Ro: continuing this conversation with you is a waste of my energy Bea: Off you go then Ro: See you at Christmas, assuming you decide that's worth returning for Bea: Either way, you won't be waiting at the window Ro: precisely Ro: and you'll have my present sent if you don't appear yourself, little else mattering at times like these anyway Bea: You aren't upset I'm not coming, you're only upset your plans are compromised Bea: because if you remotely gave a shit about me being there, you would've approached this whole conversation differently Ro: experience has taught me what you value and what you don't Ro: I'm not about to make any kind of impassioned plea in order to be a hastily added footnote Ro: particularly if it follows that I'm to be blamed for your ensuing university hardships should you dare to attend Bea: You know me so well Bea: wait, no, we both agree that is laughable Bea: so spare telling me what I will or won't do or say, my sides are splitting as is Ro: perhaps I will when you respond in kind and stop telling me how I feel or why Bea: Experience isn't something you are solely blessed/cursed with Bea: I can only react to what I'm presented with Ro: you don't want to come, of course you're reacting in line with that, that's what I'm being presented with Bea: Of course I don't, but it's about obligation regardless Ro: you've long been free from any and all obligation towards me Bea: Don't be delusional Ro: you should make time for church if you're going to make yourself such a martyr to my existence Bea: Guess what, we're not Catholic either Ro: There is no we, my faith is my own Bea: Nah Ro: you don't speak for me on any subject, especially my personal beliefs Bea: It's bullshit, Ro Bea: no one chooses to be a Catholic Ro: I have Bea: Yeah, well you would love to be special Ro: I'm so unsurprised that you manage to find enough time to be confrontational Bea: If I were to actually call you out on all your bullshit, we'd be here 'til your 18th Ro: feel free to write the most urgent of your grievances in the card you'll send Bea: You don't deserve a gift that good Ro: that much we can agree on Ro: I don't deserve any of this from you Bea: For god's sake Ro: Stay there, as we said, nobody but me thinks it's unfair that you aren't coming Bea: I'm sure they do Ro: Well, I have not and will not ever care what your boyfriend thinks Bea: As I understand, it's mutual Bea: and he's more than just my boyfriend to you Ro: no, he isn't Bea: How do you think you get to pick and choose? Bea: you can't claim Ali and ignore everyone else, they exist too, like it or not Ro: In much the same way you and he both did, I would imagine Ro: if I were to claim him as my brother, being your boyfriend would be abhorrent and it's obvious what you would both rather by now Bea: Your choice to not integrate and be part of this family has nothing to do with me Ro: Likewise Bea: Fuck you Bea: you had every chance, this is the only one you've ever known Ro: by your own admission you had all the same chances, no sacrifices made for me and no memories of the former Ro: you chose him and he chose you, you're the one being delusional if you think there was room for me and him to still play happy families afterwards Bea: Now you want to believe me, convenient isn't it Ro: and you want to have your cake and eat it, it's an appropriately timed idea, at least Bea: This isn't about me, it's about you being ungrateful Ro: No, it's about you attempting to tell me how to behave as if you reside in an ivory tower instead of a glass house Bea: You're having your teenage rebellion phase, fine Ro: again no, I'd be more than willing to listen to you had you actually said anything worth listening to Bea: Sure Ro: Undeniably so Bea: No, bullshit, again, Ro Bea: you don't listen to anything anyone has to say because you think you're right about everything despite the obvious Ro: you can't garner a receptive audience because you're just talking and talking without pausing for breath or to listen yourself Bea: This might be a big conversation for you, but that's only because you never talk to anyone but yourself either Bea: I'm actually busy, with things far more important than your tantrum Ro: Go and devote yourself fully to those things then, I already told you to do so Bea: You think you tell me what to do? Bea: No Bea: I'm not so single-minded Ro: If I had any desire to waste my breath I'd do so during a piano lesson with one of my more challenging students, when I'm paid to Bea: Yes, that about sums you up Ro: thus allowing you to draw a line under me Ro: and all of this Bea: No Bea: that's your move Bea: if you're going to be as callous as to want it, at least have the follow-through Bea: I'm not making this one easy for you, lest I be accused of martyrdom again Ro: I wouldn't dream of trying to compete with you in the stakes of who is the most callous Bea: I miss a birthday, how much have you skipped out on, Ro? Bea: When are you ever fucking here? Ro: such a convenient scapegoat for you when you no longer wish to be held to your own account Bea: If you want to be a ghost, you don't get to defend yourself Bea: dead people don't get to prove or deny any claims made about them Ro: the dead are far superior conversationalists than you, in my experience Bea: Your imagination, it'd have to be Ro: boundless though it is, no Bea: You don't know any dead people, and that's the truth of it Ro: I've met lots of them Bea: No, you haven't Bea: and how many people turn up to your party is going to reflect that Ro: yes I have, and how many people turn up to my party reflects how many people I chose to invite Ro: for all the things you deign to lecture me on, having a select social circle is perhaps one of the most hypocritical Bea: If there was any element of choice, it'd be you and Ali Bea: it's obligation and the guestlist of your not family reflects that both ways Ro: this repetition is neither effective nor amusing Bea: It's the sad fucking truth and someone needs to smash it through your thick skull Ro: a chore you'll never be too busy for when you take such delight in it Bea: I hate talking to you Bea: do you seriously not understand how much you make my skin crawl Ro: and yet here you still are Ro: how ghoulish Bea: because I am your sister Bea: your actual sister, and it isn't optional Ro: hardly, we both opt out regularly as previously highlighted Bea: No, I don't Ro: you currently are Ro: and you have on many other occasions Bea: Not being able to stomach a whole performance from you trying to be someone else is not opting out Bea: I wouldn't still be here if that were an option Ro: you'd have to know who I was in order to have the slightest indication of whether or not I was attempting to be someone different Bea: I know who you are Bea: but don't insult me by pretending you have the slightest inclination Ro: you insult me with such a barefaced lie Ro: you don't know me at all Bea: You wish Ro: I'm not in the habit of wasting wishes Bea: How's that working out for you? Ro: Perfectly Bea: Then that's really sad Ro: You're a very convincing adult Bea: That's allegedly what you're preparing yourself for Ro: sober disenchanted maturity, so Wuthering Heights asserts among many other turns of phrase Ro: you're more suited to it Bea: You know, drunken, enchanting or youthfulness aren't words anyone would apply to you Bea: so I'd be more careful with what I asserted if I were you, you aren't likely to be thrilled with what you get back Ro: I am content without the constant appraisal of others right now, perhaps when I find my own way to university we can swap places though Ro: if nothing else, it'll grant you a rest Bea: Of course you are Bea: you haven't spent this entire conversation doing just that Bea: at least package your delusions as somewhat believable to anyone else or you just look wholly derranged Ro: this entire conversation is centred around the disruption of my plans and thus my self discipline is the only thing seeking to be placated as you yourself commented Bea: You've sought out every opportunity to assert your appraisals of me, unprompted and unforgiving Bea: I wasn't going to come out of genuine lack of ability, but the poison of spite and bitterness was barely held back between your pursed lips, no need to push hard for all that to spill forth Ro: however you decide to excuse your absence makes no difference to me Bea: It makes no difference because nothing does with you Bea: you'd rather I wasn't there because at least then you have something to lament over Ro: I'd rather you weren't because you've made no secret of the fact you don't want to be, as always Bea: because it's fantasy, none of it is real Bea: what is the point of us going through the motions of pretending to have this life-affirming bonding experience when it'll be nothing close Bea: how easily I could be swapped out for any other bit player confirms that, it isn't true, and this all means fuck all to you Ro: you could be so easily swapped out because necessity has dictated it on more prior occasions than either of us have the time or inclination to call to mind Ro: you kept yourself at a distance long before you left for Cambridge, lecturing me about my lack of integration or whatever you called it doesn't change that Bea: Because it was not me you needed to intergrate with, is the point Ro: romantically aligning yourself with Fraze and babysitting Rocky on occasion doesn't mean you can point out my perceived failings as if you're an expert, moreso Bea: This constant comparison is pointless and not what I'm talking about Bea: you were meant to be a part of this family Bea: YOU, not me Ro: and I am Ro: if only because they're obligated to care for and about me as you're so quick to point out at every single opportunity Bea: if you think that's the only reason, legitimately, for them, then you're proving my point about how out of touch you are Ro: you're the one who keeps propping up this conversation with that as the reasoning Ro: whether or not it has ever crossed my mind hasn't been brought up for discussion Bea: No, it's you failing to do your part, that obligation is a two-way street Bea: you're the one giving it negative connotations Ro: being in someone's debt rarely has positive ones Bea: That's what family is Ro: and contrary to what you believe, I fulfil my responsibilities to this one Bea: If you say so Ro: I do Bea: Then that's all that matters Ro: I'm well aware of what does and doesn't matter Bea: Okay Bea: not me you need to convince Ro: I'm also well aware of where to place my conviction so that it isn't misplaced Bea: Seems like it Ro: Goodbye Bea

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [Okay, so coach ride to the school trip moment, JJ sat together 'cos who else are you gonna sit next to tbh, all the flat whites are here and we're making Grace feel like crap in all the ways, starting with having a loud, extra phone call with Pablo rn and making Grace hear and look at all this on facetime, but literally the whole bus is bearing witness, have you no shame Mia] Jimmy: [I like to think Ella and Asia are sitting together and Ella wants to die cos Asia's so dumb and Hollie's just on her phone watching tiktoks or whatever living her best life] Janis: [a mood but not at all, lmao] Janis: [okay, so my vague idea of something JJ can do to take attention away from Mia, piss her off, but without everyone else being as anti-them as they are anti-her rn, is for Janis to text Grace like come here for a sec, but that confuses Grace (obvs) so then Janis gets up and is like I NEED TO TALK TO YOU so she gets Grace out of this hell but also Mia will be PISSED she has, let's say there's a free seat in front of JJ or whatever where they can sit and then have a whisper sesh where we pretend we're talking about Jimmy but in actuality, we're not saying much beyond, you're welcome and, go along with it] Janis: [then once this has happened, all the flat whites will be 👀 WHAT DID SHE SAY etc, and THEN JJ can be couply cute like snuggling etc now they know they're looking] Jimmy: [I stan your mind boo] Janis: [so, Mia has been pissing us all off for time but it's when she's like, forcibly trying to get Grace to talk to Pablo, Janis visibly stiffens and is like, nah] Janis: If you do me a favour right now, I'll do you two Jimmy: Alright Janis: [inact this Grace moment for a plausible amount of time for a girly chat you simply NEED to have RIGHT NOW so sorry Mia, that's probably 10-15 minutes at least you two have to sit together and talk so, if you wanna, you can be Grace for a sec and we can '-' or we can just say roughly what they'd find to talk about lol it might be amusing potentially] Jimmy changed name to Grace Janis: [after the text, coming over with such a clearly but purposely fake apologetic face like oop sorry to barge in on this phone conversation you're having so publicly 'Grace, can I borrow you for a sec?' with a kind of serious but also excited tone, like, the just-NEED-to-talk-about-this-NOW vibe] Grace: [Grace just like 'oh yeah, sure, babes' in a tone that's lowkey like anything for you anytime because 1. it'll annoy Mia 2. she literally would die for Janis and we know it, making her body language and face as excited but serious like she respects this TRUST, fuck you Mia, before throwing an apologetic look at Mia as they go so she knows it's a deliberate afterthought] Janis: [smiling at Jimmy as you sit back down, opposite/in front of him, which she doesn't smile a lot at school/ever obvs so that itself would be so strange, everything from this point essentially in a whisper/no more than a murmur so no one else can hear, which is fine 'cos object of your affection is RIGHT THERE so everyone understands the vibe without needing to hear anything 'she's a cunt' gritted teeth 'cos we're fuming about this phonecall shenanigan but then switching to a #conspiratorial 😏 look, peeping at him between the seats as if to really drive that home 'i'm gonna shit in her bed' with a grin] Grace: [so effortlessly following this that would be concerning except that we know she's living a fake life every day so it's just standard to her by this point which hurts my heart but okay Gracie 'so is he' because she's having some emotions herself about the Pablo and dad situation but we can't let them show 'totally a match made in hell' holds her face/fans it like whatever Janis is saying is making her blush and giving her like an OMG look before likewise peeping at poor Jimothy but deliberately less subtly because everyone expects her to be that bitch/the friend who turns around when you tell 'em not to 'IOU if you need a lookout or whatever, but I'd hate to tread on barista boy's toes so' looks at him again and smiles herself] Janis: [nodding, really to agree with that sentiment, but making it look as if she's admitting to something like okay, you got me and hiding her own face in her hands like we're so 🤭 'hope he knocks up Asia' when you've said it just to be a bitch and because you're angry but the obvious parallel to what Caleb and Drew actually did to Ali and Carly does not escape you so you shake your head now and then lean in further, saying 'WELL-' at a louder, potentially overhearable volume, as if you're about to spill the ACTUAL tea 'nah, don't worry about it, long as she gets hers'] Grace: [when you sigh because you're so sad and over everything tbh and the reminder of both deadbeat dads doesn't help but you turn it into an excited gasp before it's even out of your mouth properly because that's something you're used to with all these shit lads, likewise the fake facial expressions are so on point as you pretend you're getting that tea and say something loud like OMG because you're obvs so excited you can't help it and do a fake look around like oh I hope nobody heard that 'he's already given her an STI, but you obviously didn't hear that from me' spills actually tea because we're sad and mad rn like] Janis: [giving her a half-genuine smile/look of appreciation that gets overtaken by an OTT 😍 one about your current situation before you'd barely have chance to clock it, giving her the expected playful-slap-on-the-arm like what are you like? at least you can use the actual snort at this news to pretend you're so amused about anything but Mia getting the clap 'very romantic' letting your voice raise again on any word that would help sell your story, actually covertly looking over to the flat whites 'she's hung up now, of course' 'cos what's the point if you can't torture Grace] Grace: [when you're doing a whole apology moment loud enough to be heard by Mia cos will annoy her because you never apologise to her sincerely but also as your chance to actually be like I'm so sorry that our lives are like this and we don't talk anymore because all this comes out when you're drunk but before jj fake date when are you two ever at the same parties, you just aren't and you're having enough emotions to accidentally go there 'he's literally such a dark horse, I can't even' looking at Jimmy and again loud enough to be heard even though you're shading Pablo and Mia because duh, doesn't look over at the gals cos she doesn't need to, we know the drill by now 'duh' but her voice is like a dead version of her real one and thus in such a whisper because the most genuine thing she's said lowkey in forever 'he doesn't care how her day's going and what can she say anyway' cos we all know he only wants to hook up and her life is boring and basic] Janis: [when you can shh her because not that deep and we're so close and sisterly rn but it really 'cos this makes you so uncomfortable like stop 'I know' when you have to force the enthusiasm into your voice on that one 'cos we all know Pablo is an unavoidable dickhead even before this and you're grieving too rn boy but still, Mia, of all people, ew, 'I can't believe it' when your overall demeanor and tone projects that you feel so #blessed but the reality of the words is literally the opposite 'daddy issues, right' clutching your hand to your chest like you're talking about something SO cute he did but the 'awh, bless' is all for that tragic hoe] Grace: ['same' and likewise your tone is the opposite as it also is when you nod in agreement to the daddy issues comment cos that hits close to home obvs 'this trip is gonna be so' loud enough that people can hear that too even though you also mean that in a please kill me way not a I really ship JJ way] Janis: ['Yeah...' and a sigh that is SO wistful and not at all exasperated at all the shit Mia can and will try to pull, going back to the #conspiratorial 😏 look 'I've got plans' and winking 'cos have, getting up like better get back to it 🤭 and giving her a one-armed hug as you stand to go, purely as a fuck you ladies, turning back like oh! just remembered and handing her your phone 'downloaded that album you wanted to listen to' at normal volume, so she has an excuse to stay put and put headphones on] Grace: [making your own song and dance of forgetting something too purely because you're dying over the hug like I'm so dumb I'd forget my weave if it wasn't glued in and passing her something between the seats once she's sat back down with Jimboy, honestly fuck knows what it even is but it'd drive everyone crazy trying to guess] Grace changed name to Jimmy Janis: [gonna lowkey need that phone back but it can easily be passed back via the seats so that's no issue, just not looking at him yet 'cos can't 'cos that was so OTT for you (obvs) but you can have a bit of 😳 before you commit to this part of it] Jimmy: [playfully nudges her and passes her his phone (oh the trust ladies) and takes a headphone leaving her one cos as far as everyone knows Grace has hers and he knows everyone is looking at them and what is going on and that's his way of telling her he's keeping up with it] Janis: [when you a mvp, nudging him back and it means far too much to be decipherable like sorry, thanks and more all in one gesture, leaning in figuratively and literally for this headphone moment, which makes resting your head on his shoulder that much easier] Jimmy: [we know he's softly playing with her hair for the first time ever because we can pretend he's playing along but really he's wanted to do that since day 1 baby] Janis: [when you do put some music on so you can have some vague distraction but you put it on pretty quiet, so you could still whisper to each other 'alright?' like, asking if he is, if that was, if this is, again, too many potential ways to mean that] Jimmy: [when you just say yeah at a normal volume because use that to your advantage] Janis: ['yeah?' back in what can only be described as low-key saucy, like oh really vibes but like, oh really lol] Jimmy: [gives her the first LOOK ever and nods because we can both play this game gal] Janis: [when the fact that that shook you works to your advantage so you don't have to worry, turning this into more of a snug than it was, putting your arms around his waist and loudly whispering 'I'll make it up to you' 'cos gonna pay off that debt but take that as you will people] Jimmy: [when you can just be 😏 cos it works but you're wondering how she reckons she'll do that and you know she knows that] Janis: [okay, using his phone to type back and forth 'cos that'll look cute and keep up the lie] Janis: how does she look Janis: scale 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 Jimmy: 😡😡😡 Janis: not bad Jimmy: but will it do? Janis: got three days to 🤯 Jimmy: if you need 'em Janis: that a challenge? Jimmy: does it sound like one? Janis: 👌 Jimmy: [takes her hand to write ok on it because it looks like they're holding hands so challenge accepted vibes] Janis: 🦐 is 😢 Jimmy: duh he's got resting 🦐 face Janis: [loling 'cos hohoho so funny babe but part of that was genuine] Jimmy: [when you gotta give OTT 😍 cos she's got a cute laugh] Janis: do I need to put 🤢 on the scale Janis: or is that purely 💀#1 💀#2 Jimmy: they would reckon that's #ultimategoals Jimmy: a lad who triggers their gag reflex Janis: 🤮💘 Janis: GROSS Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [😍 for the fans] Jimmy: [don't think about how bad you wanna kiss her boy, you can't risk being the new Mia of this coach] Janis: [you gonna have to chill but it won't be that much of a journey wherever you're going so don't worry lads, in fact, close your eyes and pretend you gonna have a lil nap on him] Jimmy: [just doodling on her with your fingertip really softly I like to imagine he's drawing out the scale] Janis: [love that, we must skip though] Jimmy: [so okay, activity time, we having Grace on JJ's team cos suck a dick Mia and a boy she can flirt with, then some random] Janis: [it should be a girl Mia has beef with, for some ridiculous reason, like bitch has deffo not done anything lol] Jimmy: [yasssssss I love that] Janis: [yo y'all better win or at least beat her team] Jimmy: [wouldn't be hard to beat her or loads of the others even if they don't win but ngl I'd love it if you did] Janis: [do it we're writing it fight us they're competitive and they're dying 💀#1 💀#2 so bye] Jimmy: [fuck it nobody would be expecting any of yall to win or care so I'm about it] Janis: [hohaha start as you mean to go on tbh] Jimmy: where on the scale now? Janis: 🤬 Janis: definitely heard her name followed by bitch Janis: my review even less favourable Jimmy: [picks her up and spins her round like he's so buzzing they won] Jimmy: that'll help Janis: don't put your back out Jimmy: I ain't as old as I look Janis: [😏] Janis: that's what they all say Jimmy: you been to catholic school, girl? Jimmy: I get why they all wanna crack onto you now Janis: rude you didn't get it before Jimmy: wouldn't wanna make your head any bigger Jimmy: touch and go picking you up as it were Janis: not my fault you're short and I ain't 💀 Jimmy: piss off am I Janis: no need to 🤬 Janis: we 🏆🥇 Jimmy: What you trying to make me 😭 for then? Janis: awh, babes Jimmy: leave it out Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hmu when you wanna make a cracking bridge again then Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: 😎🔥 Janis: I get it, IOU rn Janis: 💭 on Jimmy: I have had the one Janis: yeah? Jimmy: this is working, yeah? Jimmy: shes at 🤬 you said Janis: it's making this trip worthwhile, yeah Jimmy: nowt to do but crack on with making it more worthwhile Jimmy: neither of us can move for 'better' offers, can we? Janis: Literally gonna rip out my own 👀 or everyone else's if they don't calm it down with the sexts Janis: so, you wanna 🤯? Jimmy: want is a bit strong Jimmy: but if we're pissing about performing for her, might as well clear our DMs of dickheads while we're at it Janis: yeah, it makes sense Janis: may as well use it to our advantage any way we can Jimmy: while we're stuck here doing this bollocks at least Janis: kills time, keeps us from killing anyone Janis: I'm down Jimmy: Alright Janis: how are we gonna do this then Janis: like, exactly Jimmy: How do you wanna do it? Janis: We'll have to go some for people to calm down, obviously Janis: people have no problem being hoes Jimmy: I know Janis: so like, full 😍 then Janis: ? Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: won't be that hard, people have no problem believing we're #fated either if all those likes are owt to go by Janis: they're idiots and I'm well convincing Jimmy: yeah alright, Julie, I'll collect your oscar for you on my way out 'cause it won't be for long either Jimmy: I'll piss off soon and no dickhead's expecting us to keep going at being that starcrossed Janis: 'course not Janis: they'll forget about you in a week or two Janis: makes sense for this trip, as you said Janis: everyone's tryna get off with each other and it gets both of us an easy out Jimmy: mine or yours tonight then, my dear? Janis: I'll come to yours Janis: then Grace can have then over and they can 👀 I ain't in Jimmy: you're on to a real winner today, girl Jimmy: not just a big head Janis: that's the spirit Jimmy: 👻 Janis: specifically no 👻ing Jimmy: What about 🥃? Janis: DUH Janis: you got some? Jimmy: not very #goals to have to bribe you but Jimmy: wouldn't come here empty handed Janis: obviously I've only got eyes for you, Casper Janis: oh, who are you rooming with? Jimmy: Dunno, man bun, deepest of v neck t-shirts? Jimmy: only got eyes for his vape Janis: oh Janis: yep, I know who you mean Janis: 🎨 description Jimmy: ain't saying I could be an undercover 👮 or one of their informants but if Mia's dad goes down I will take the 🏆 Janis: 🐀boy can be your new name Jimmy: tah, sweetheart 💕 Janis: yeah, well couple goals that Jimmy: that'll be why I propositioned you Janis: is propositioned a sexy word? Janis: it sounds a bit 👮 report Jimmy: Busted, I'm 45 and faking being a real #lad an' all, the 😎 hide my crows feet Jimmy: can't have any secrets between us, like Janis: gotcha Janis: makes sense why Mia is 🤤 Jimmy: and sir Janis: you wish Janis: devvo he ain't here Jimmy: alright, put down the 🧂 babe, you'll give me a heart attack Janis: 🙄 Janis: yeah secretly so jealous of our fat, balding 🤓 of a teacher Jimmy: DUH Janis: 💁 Jimmy: while we're chucking tea about, I weren't on that teen soap, so warn us if you're gonna show up to my door naked Janis: not my plan Janis: reckon we can scandalize without going there Janis: soap and romcom tropes would be our friend though so let us down there Jimmy: soz, I were #blessed with the accent and the IQ for that bollocks but none of the emotional range Janis: leave off Janis: your 😍 were solid Jimmy: save the compliments til my room's full of dickheads to overhear Janis: just don't mention the part where I fake it like a pro Janis: not an idiot Jimmy: easy to say you take it like a pro instead Jimmy: nowt to worry about Janis: lovely Janis: are we fucking or are we 💘 Janis: important distinction Jimmy: reckon we can have it all, Juliet Janis: alright Jimmy: I know it ain't just for 💀👑 now but nowt'll piss her off more Janis: right, she's incapable of any of the finer human emotions Janis: oh, her boyfriend gave her an STI Jimmy: lovely, that Jimmy: which one? Janis: which boyfriend or which STI, yeah Janis: the one I'm related to, by all accounts Janis: 🤞 chlamydia so I don't need to cuntpunt her Jimmy: sounds a bit like the name of a kid fiddling island her dad does his business lunches on Jimmy: works on loads of levels Janis: 😏 Janis: he will be SO proud Janis: though, probably casually racist which is what makes him the ideal candidate for a boyfriend Jimmy: 🤞 his secretary ain't related to me if her dad's caught it off her Jimmy: turned down that teen soap for a reason Janis: 😱 Janis: goes all the way to the top Jimmy: 🏆🥇 Janis: was slightly concerned you were saying you fuck your cousins or something but as I only need to fake touch you Janis: you do you Jimmy: I ain't got any cousins, soz if that's pissed on your ultimate kink Janis: I'm not fucking 'em, new boy Jimmy: 👌 Janis: you don't vape, do you Jimmy: what kind of fucking question is that? Janis: a valid one 😎boy Janis: 'cos that shit gives me a headache Janis: not gonna sit in your cotton candy cloud Jimmy: you've had a 🚬 with me, dickhead Jimmy: did that taste 🍧🍦🧁🍰🎂🍭🍬 🍫 to you? Janis: might mix your vices Janis: but nah, you're old school 😎 good Jimmy: I can 💀💀💀 buzzing, grinning in my ⚰ over knowing you reckon I'm 👍 Janis: obviously Janis: 🍀 you Jimmy: 🥃 give you a headache an' all, you want a 🍹 instead, Jane? Janis: piss off Janis: 1. offering shit you can't provide unless you've brought mixer and ice with you too 2. being a dickhead Jimmy: 1. someone'll have brought a 🧃 it's a school trip 2. you're being a dickhead Janis: 1. you a barman and all? 2. save it for your roommates, lover boy Jimmy: 1. find out in a bit, won't you 2. I don't have a vape pen, remember, fucked the foreplay right up Janis: your idea of foreplay is worrying Janis: fake or otherwise Jimmy: bit late to spread that about, we're committed to being #goals not what were it Mia said, weird freaks or some bollocks Janis: can tell she's not an artist Janis: words not her strong suit Jimmy: what is? Janis: ♙ Jimmy: if that ain't nerd flirting, I dunno what would be Janis: seeing she can control mindless idiots ain't 😍 Janis: if I wanted to be surrounded by those kind of people, I could do it easier Jimmy: the game though, all that eye contact and pissing about Janis: find us a board and we'll give 'em foreplay then Jimmy: [draws her a pisstakey flirty board] Janis: 😂 Janis: lemme practice not blinking Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: my line Jimmy: Alright, go on Janis: I already said it Jimmy: you wanted the practice Jimmy: have another crack at it Janis: I'll say it when they can hear Jimmy: 🤞 you'll say a bit more than that Jimmy: they're idiots, you already said an' all Janis: idiots need visuals, I'm aware Jimmy: you've got something going on behind them unblinking 👀 I'm aware Janis: 💘 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: [skipperoni to showing up in your PJs, a bold move] Jimmy: [when it's a lewk and his jaw hitting the floor isn't fake at all] Janis: [we just pretending we don't even know Oli/anyone else is there, soz boy] Jimmy: [at least he can shamelessly check her out like 🤤 cos they are though] Janis: [we asking for the drink] Jimmy: [thanks for that Ian] Janis: [I hope you're bottom bunk if not enjoy the view everyone whilst you climb up, like] Jimmy: [for that reason alone he has to be top] Janis: ['I was bored without you'] Jimmy: ['you better stay for a bit then' obviously joins her up there because was making a show of looking out to check for teachers and all that nonsense 'at least til you ain't bored'] Janis: ['sounds like a plan' and a LOOK under the pretense they're probably standing about so can see, 'cos y'all ain't gonna be on the bottom bunk together are you] Jimmy: [a LOOK back before you open the bottle for her because gentlemanly not cos you're stalling nope] Janis: ['Slainte' and taking a shot whilst maintaining that ♙ eye contact] Jimmy: [does the thing where he takes the bottle from her but instead of taking a drink he pulls her into him but I'm gonna say that her hair is down so they can't see what he's doing because the truth is nothing yet even though it looks like he's kissing her neck or whatever because he's a good boy and he wants to know it's okay first so a LOOK which is actually an unspoken question lol] Janis: [taking the bottle back and putting it down on top of the wardrobe or whatever in reply like yeah, let's go for it, partly to prove you're down for the plan and not scared and also 'cos you know Oli will get too awks and make them all leave if you actually do anything so it won't have to be a Thing for ages, like] Jimmy: [goes in for the first kiss and it's obviously EVERYTHING goodbye] Janis: [rip you two, it's DEFINITELY continuing after they out the door, even if for a hot sec, you are that blatant, like, just in case they forgot something or whatever] Jimmy: [duh it'd ruin everything if they forgot their vape and came back and you weren't still going] Janis: [just dedicated to the act, alright] Jimmy: [he doesn't know they're related so lowkey surprised they left so fast and of course gutted we know but acting unfazed by having that drink finally] Jimmy: [bit rude cos that makes it seem like you hated it but okay boy] Janis: [not about to bring it up before or after, just hopping down like ta-da and looking at the window so casually] Jimmy: goes to the window and 🚬 out of it cos still offended she asked you if you vape] Janis: [sniffs like she seeing if it's 🍧🍦🧁🍰🎂🍭🍬 🍫 or nah] Jimmy: [blows a smoke ring at her but in a sassy way not a Harley aggressively blowing smoke at Ro back in the day way] Janis: [still wafting it away like we're Mia levels of disgusted but 😏 'cos not] Jimmy: [turning back to the window but obvs amused, we're all 😏 rn] Janis: ['they'll tell everyone, Nathan has a big mouth' looks around the room like 'what are we gonna do for at least 15 minutes, so you don't get THAT rep'] Jimmy: ['does look a bit like if Mick Jagger fucked some local lass and weren't feeling the need to shout about it for obvious reasons' looks at the bottle wherever he left that and back at her with a shrug 'fancy a game of chess?']] Janis: [snorts 'we'd all know about it anyway, no one 'round here can keep a secret' follows his eyes with hers and nods 'alright'] Jimmy: [IRL 🤞 and checks his phone we know he's checking on Cass and Bobby but it looks like he's checking if people are saying shit yet so, picks the bottle back up, takes a swing and passes it back to her] Janis: [when a thought #hits and you get your phone and as you're taking your swig you do some searching and put some sex sounds on and put your phone under a pillow to convincingly muffle it and 🤫 at him like speak quiet if you're gonna] Jimmy: [🙄 but also nod because it's a good idea] Janis: [nudges him as she walks back to give him the bottle 'you want me to be -' mimes 🤐 '-or you expect me to sit here and do it myself?' pointing at the phone like no thank you] Jimmy: ['I get it, everyone's so desperate to fuck you or know what it'd be like they've got their ears pressed to the door'] Janis: [shrugs like yes, your point?] Jimmy: [gets back on his bed and gets comfy so she'll have to get on either Ollie's bed below or his if she wants to talk to him cos shh] Janis: [🙄 and a dramatic sigh but fake is sexy but you're 😒] Jimmy: [texting his sister for a while but then his phone is blowing up because people are scandalised so he chucks it at her so she can see] Janis: ['phase one complete' shaking her head as she reads a bit but then chucking it back like a hot 🥔 'probably have to eat dinner at the same table'] Jimmy: [nods but when he's thinking about everyone watching them his own idea hits and it's the lovebites so he gestures for her to come here] Janis: [climbing up this bed again like ugh, excuse me] Jimmy: [I think to think she's as far away as she can be so he's like 'come here' but we whispering of course so it's accidentally hot] Janis: [assumedly, and we are questioning this but we also aren't 'cos we do come closer, obviously] Jimmy: [reaches out and touches her hair, moving it away from her neck and looking at that as yet unbruised skin and we know he's thinking if she has her hair up everyone else will be seeing that too so he looks at her and you know it's meant to be a look like do you see where I'm going with this but it's shamelessly just a LOOK] Janis: [when you automatically bring your hand up to move his away like oi, excuse me but you catch up with this being part of the plan so then you're just holding his hand there 'good thinking' when again, you have to whisper so it all just sounds so much hotter and #intoit than it would if you could just speak but soz, you can't] Jimmy: [looks at her phone under the pillow still playing those saucy sex sounds 'could just google how to fake 'em' cos you know people have blatantly done that but then he's looking at her again and licking his lips and generally being hot af] Janis: [shakes head 'that's more effort' taking the phone and turning them off, like, how suggestive like are you gonna be making the noises now too or what 'meant to make our lives easier, yeah?'] Jimmy: [holds her hair out of the way which is also lowkey hot soz not soz and goes in cos unspoken challenge accepted on getting her to make better noises than that] Janis: [we out here doing the most] Jimmy: [god bless] Janis: [know we giving him some in the process, only fair, not like we need to] Jimmy: [there's no hiding behind your hair boy and that's the only flimsy excuse we need] Janis: [and we need to be THAT obvious so everyone knows, duh] Jimmy: [like she said, gotta make both of their lives easier not only make one of 'em look swag, very much mutual and both #goals thank you] Janis: [exactly, we're fucking off and over the flat whites and co, not each other] Jimmy: [thank god she turned off the sounds because there's no stopping him from making any and we need to pretend it's OTT fake at this point instead of him being THAT into it already] Janis: ['you're a good actor' 'cos you said you'd say it] Jimmy: ['you're -' we're not finishing that because he hasn't said it loud enough to style it into a fake compliment] Janis: [biting his bottom lip 'cos you weren't kissing for long enough so you simply gotta so they're more bruised] Jimmy: [I love that you could've just bitten your own but more fun for everyone like that because you know he'd follow suit and do the same for her] Janis: [we need to be thorough here, that might not be enough] Jimmy: [hence just lowkey making out now but I think we should have a teacher catch them cos Mia or Ella snitched to cockblock because in the OG they had that punishment to clean everyone else's rooms and they stole their shit and I think we should still do that cos it was a mood but in the OG they had that punishment cos they snuck off to the pub which they don't need to because Ian's stash is a thing this time] Janis: [agree fully because a. they would and b. the teacher can be so shame-y and then everyone will hear if said teacher is going off and then bitching about them to the other teachers] Jimmy: [yeah it's a much better idea and an actual decent way to cockblock so they don't just hook up rn] Janis: [I'm with it, 'cos we can steal someone else's booze if theirs also gets confiscated for bonus scandal points] Jimmy: [love that] Janis: [okay, so dinner after we've been bollocked and everyone is shooketh, not allowed to sit together so] Jimmy: [oooh we should say Grace is putting make up on her love bites for her because that is a way to draw even more attention to it cos lowkey in the midst of dinner here] Janis: [gets out kit lmao] Jimmy: [exactly and a reason for her to be like Grace you need to sit with me so Mia is seething] Janis: [what did you think would come of this really, Mia, there's only so much 'trouble' they can get into and they don't care] Jimmy: [and like if you thought Grace would be embarrassed and that would drive a wedge you haven't considered that 1. she's a hoe 2. so much worse shit gets said about the cali fam as standard] Janis: [it's gonna get worse if they come in your room later in this trip so like, blow your load now alright girl] Jimmy: [which needs to happen because that was the fake injury moment and was iconic] Janis: [mhmm] Janis: OI DICKHEAD REMEMBER TO LOOK 😍 WHEN YOU READ THIS 😘 Jimmy: [does a real little lol and then looks at her IRL with fake longing] Jimmy: Alright? Janis: 👌 Janis: No one is gonna think it's over this food, so yeah, it'll do Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: bit rude they're trying to poison us before we do it ourselves Janis: tell he's the maths teacher Janis: not following the plot here Jimmy: might 🔪 the messenger if he's going that hard with the Shakespeare but alright Jimmy: I'll obvs die for you Janis: the bruises aren't that bad Jimmy: they look 🥇 from here Janis: [a LOOK from across the room] Janis: done the job, like Jimmy: [one back of course that's really lingering to really make the point] Jimmy: as they go, pissing about with you for a bit's not as bad as cleaning 🚽 Jimmy: don't get a massive head over it but Janis: unlikely Janis: generous and forthcoming with the 🥇 compliments as you are Jimmy: Oi, don't forget my 🥇💡 Janis: you got your recognition Jimmy: piss easy to get more Janis: obviously Janis: but what next Janis: aside from all this nerd flirting business Jimmy: Depends Janis: ? Jimmy: how you feeling? Jimmy: you look a bit cold to me Janis: [looks down at nips lmao] Jimmy: [he wants to lol but is 😏 cos he comes over to her and puts his hoodie on her, like enjoy the show everyone] Janis: alright, fairplay Janis: [snuggling in like full smug suck it everyone] Jimmy: check the pockets 🎁💕 Jimmy: [has drawn her something and written a little love note for the added brag] Janis: [making a big show of being extra secretive and trying to look at it privately so everyone on the table is 👀] Jimmy: [he made sure it was extra thankfully in case they can see and didn't write like oi dickhead] Janis: I'll 📸 it later Janis: was 🤞 for some 🚬s Jimmy: I've kept hold of them Jimmy: find me later Janis: very see me after class vibes Janis: alright Jimmy: if you wanna stick your uniform on for the 📸 go ahead, mate Janis: 💔 I didn't bring it with Janis: could wait but Jimmy: 💀👑 will be, mad for a uniform, her Janis: so I've heard Janis: what is it then, little apron Jimmy: [sends the CG instagram cos he won't have random pics of himself in his uniform on his phone] Janis: very Janis: starbucks lite Jimmy: they'll be 🎻💔😭 Janis: delete this comment 'fore I hit send Jimmy: already @ed it to 'em Janis: 🐍 you are Jimmy: got the fang marks to prove it, you Janis: now she's punched us with a brush as well quite sore tbh Jimmy: poor baby Janis: yes you're very concerned Janis: Mr Lucas is Jimmy: gutted he can't kiss you better is what he is Janis: idk, maybe he's 🎻💔😭 'cos you've ruined me Jimmy: very old school, that Jimmy: you're alright, I got no STI's Janis: @him Jimmy: what's his @? Janis: @virginsonly Jimmy: did he used to work at the local catholic or what? Janis: just to the point and selective, I think Jimmy: now I'm 🎻💔😭 Jimmy: why ain't I good enough for you sir? Fucking LOVE me, like Janis: and scene 🎬👏 Jimmy: Hang on, I need to be standing on this table Janis: 😏 Janis: love that for him, you fully crack after what, a month or so of bumming Jimmy: when you know you know, mate Jimmy: what we've got is SO real Janis: of course it is Jimmy: speaking of, what are we doing in a bit? Janis: having a 🚬 Janis: you said Jimmy: I mean are we 🎻💔😭 apart like 🤓 or 💕 together like 😎 Jimmy: how do you want the 🎬? Jimmy: can do loads with socials either @ or with Janis: whatever she says Janis: or fucks Janis: 🤓 is how she actually kicks it so Janis: 😎 is better Janis: what can they do, send us home Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: pay for my cab 'cos not gonna get my mum out here Janis: starcrossed love is the way to go, so, max sneaking for 💘 Jimmy: Alright Janis: you don't give a shit, right? Jimmy: about what? Janis: potential trouble, this trips' educational value, etc Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: just making sure Jimmy: [comes over to her again and whispers in her ear 'there's your answer' cos he really gives a shit about absolutely nothing rn and the teachers would be fuming cos stop it boy] Janis: [when the 😏 is real 'cos likewise, cares about nothing and is so bored of everyone and everything but obvs the quick kiss is to piss 'em off further] Jimmy: [when you turn it into more a kiss ™ as if you can't not because you can't get enough of her but not so much that you're Mia on the coach about it] Janis: [know people are gonna be highkey anyways like why not lads] Jimmy: [exactly and loads of 'em are putting it on their stories etc blatantly so] Janis: [#exposure] Jimmy: [I feel like the teachers should make either him or her go to their room because the kind of bullshit that achieves nothing like are you gonna make sure they stay there or what] Janis: [literally, like oh, without supervision, at least you've been smart enough to just send the one but still, it should be him I think] Janis: 🍀 Jimmy: [sends a pic of him on his bed really comfy like but if anyone sees it looks like an I wish you were here kinda thing instead of rubbing it in lol] Janis: twat Janis: i've got to stay here and do fucking 'fun' team building bullshit Jimmy: if you can't get yourself sent out, then you can't, babe Jimmy: if any dickhead were capable of 🥇 you wouldn't need me Janis: 😒 Janis: they aren't gonna send us both out, even they aren't quite that thick Janis: rude Jimmy: they can't stop you going for a piss, even Mia's dad would win that case and he is that thick Jimmy: you don't go back and what? Janis: they definitely go to our rooms Janis: so where are we going? Jimmy: where do you wanna go? Janis: wherever, far away enough from the windows and we'll be alright Jimmy: Come on then Janis: post that pic whilst you're waiting Jimmy: [does obviously] Janis: [posts his doodle in the comments of people saying how cute he is like IKR] Jimmy: you're a good actor an' all Janis: Take my bow as I make my escape Jimmy: head that big, ain't an easy feat not to topple over Janis: what I'm hearing is, you think I'm well impressive Jimmy: didn't realise you were deaf, my little brother will be chuffed to bits Janis: not gonna fake meet your family Janis: calm yourself down, boy Jimmy: weren't asking you to Jimmy: steady on, girl Janis: mhmm, what was that? Janis: my selective hearing couldn't make it out Jimmy: [sends a voice memo but instead of calling her a dickhead or something because he doesn't know where she is rn and who might here it's like I SAID COME HERE] Jimmy: [*hear I cannot type today at all] Janis: 👏 Janis: I am omw Janis: please make sure you are decent Jimmy: as an actor? 👌 Janis: was thinking don't open the door naked either Janis: but maybe those two can't coexist Jimmy: stop thinking about me naked, Judith Janis: you started it Jimmy: Calm yourself down, so bloody extra, you Janis: oh sorry, didn't know I was in a groupchat with the GALS Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Janis: prepare to be that #shook Janis: [turn up to collect him] Jimmy: [does an IRL equivalent of 😱] Janis: ['come on, kev' 😏] Jimmy: [we out of here] Janis: [go for your smoke lads 'so what #content are we getting out of this?'] Jimmy: [they should do the sexy blowback thing purely for #content obvs] Janis: [purely, mhmm] Jimmy: [and I vote she should sit on his lap for the first time cos casual 🚬 photoshoot happening] Janis: [gotta make sure you're in shot, all of this is well necessary] Jimmy: [you wouldn't wanna be out of frame and have to take these pics all over again oh no] Janis: [that would just not be on brand, arty boy] Jimmy: [I love how extra you two are immediately, it's literally my fave thing] Janis: [fully could have stayed in your room and been like ha soz but no] Jimmy: [you should wanna be caught but we know why you don't] Janis: [the tea, the pretense of taking videos and pics is so flimsy but at least you tried and didn't just go to makeout] Jimmy: [and at least there will be actual #content because anything that annoys Mia gives me life] Janis: [exactly dr phil you're allowed] Jimmy: [what else can these little rebhogs do?] Janis: [maybe if the teachers are looking for her again, and now him 'cos checked their rooms, they can come back in together and be like, it's not fair to leave Jimmy out 'cos not and then just be couply af whilst doing whatever evening activity 'til bed] Jimmy: [I'll allow it because their teachers are clearly shit and like they've already given them their punishment to clean up everyone's rooms tomorrow so as far as they are concerned job done] Janis: [can't stop teen hormones and didn't come on the trip to be in his room so yolo, then Mia will be annoyed again 'cos no one is getting in trouble] Jimmy: [yeah she'd be trying to cause shit in this activity no doubt, ooh maybe that's when she or Ella gets hurt and makes a meal of it so it's not even the same day as Janis they are just trying to milk it that hard] Janis: [a mood, can also put an end to everyone's fun low-key, tah ladies] Jimmy: no oscar for her Janis: How is she that bad at it when she's faked every boy she's been with is Mia? Janis: poor show Jimmy: brb I gotta @ my dad to tell him my brother ain't the biggest cry baby going and pour bleach into my eyes and ears Janis: bit insensitive on the ears but yeah Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: *🤢 Jimmy: 💀#2💕💀👑 Janis: it has been a few hours since they last purged probs Janis: explains everything Jimmy: tah for another lovely visual Jimmy: SUCH #couplegoals them Janis: your toothbrush is my toothbrush, babe Jimmy: I were thinking if you come round early enough in the morning without waking Gracie when you do we can make it look like you stayed and we're sneaking you out when the dickhead I'm sharing with wakes up Janis: That's a good idea Janis: she gets up early, so it'd feel more like late night but still works Janis: they should all be up to, even if their end result is more 'natural' Jimmy: be piss easy to make sure enough of 'em see you then Jimmy: me an' all when I walk you back Janis: right to the door Janis: well gentlemanly Janis: less so if I invite you in for round two but that depends who's seen and who's still watching, obvs Jimmy: 💰 on Mr Lucas from the bushes Janis: 🤞 Janis: nice to know he still cares, like Jimmy: it's all #bants til he comes out of the shrubs with a 💍 Janis: 😬 Jimmy: soz mate, bit rude to get your hopes up Janis: now you can't read facial expressions 😎boy Jimmy: never said I could Jimmy: just lips, and I ain't looking at yours unless the rest of the dickheads are 👀 at us Janis: facetime goodnight would be a little much Jimmy: unless 💀👑 is tucked up with Grace while her missus is in sick bay Janis: thankfully not Janis: can't come in without being invited Jimmy: you'd know about that vampire girl Janis: says you Janis: very tender, as I previously mentioned Jimmy: I did say it, yeah, and I previously mentioned how sympathetic I was an' all Janis: not your most convincing work Jimmy: 💔 Janis: yeah, you should feel bad Jimmy: for which bit? Janis: your shit performance Janis: obvs Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I ain't given a single shit performance Janis: your sympathy just seems very disingenuous to me Jimmy: Baby, I'm so sorry Janis: more like it Janis: believe you've done this before now Jimmy: done what before, said sorry or left a lass needing a 🩹? Janis: had a girlfriend Janis: soz Mr Lucas Jimmy: no need to @ him Janis: another secret to keep? Janis: I dunno Jimmy: the secret that I ain't gay is already out, mate Janis: devastated Janis: gay bff is probably well more up their street than boyfriend tbh Jimmy: probably not too late to go for that Jimmy: if you really wanna Jimmy: come round and I'll plait your hair or some bollocks Jimmy: you already know my crushes Janis: 🤢 Janis: is what I think to that suggestion Janis: 💘 easier to fake Jimmy: for you 'cause I'm well fit and mysterious Janis: for me 'cos I don't have to talk to you half as much this way Jimmy: you can be the strong silent type any way we play this, Jasmine Jimmy: it's alright Janis: nah Janis: as I said, the straight girls will be more up on you, if anything Janis: and the gay boys would actually be 💔 from the queer bait so probs don't Jimmy: #whenshecaresaboutsparingyoudickpicDMs Jimmy: I get it, I don't deserve you, sweetheart Janis: don't have time to count all the ways you're so lucky to have me Janis: cataloging all these dick pics Jimmy: be a #goals tweet though Jimmy: hang on fans, I'm so lucky I ran out of characters Janis: have that for free Janis: need to up my cute though Janis: not my fault I can't draw Jimmy: yeah you can Jimmy: that 🎨 of Mia and her dad cracking onto each other was a top masterpiece Jimmy: [is tweeting about how lucky he is to have her obvs] Janis: you're a sick, sick boy Jimmy: came from your 🧠 girl Jimmy: I just appreciated it, what you do with #art Janis: never said I weren't as well Janis: have to admit they might have us both beat though Jimmy: true 💕 Jimmy: nowt we can do to compete with owt that real Jimmy: or that twisted Janis: unless you are 45 Janis: little bit of tan and we could sell that you're my dad Jimmy: Northern 45 is a southern twat's 95 Jimmy: dunno if black face is the way to go though, mate Jimmy: ain't worked out brilliantly for loads of others Janis: you wanted twisted Jimmy: but the deal is, when you want me 💀💀💀 you do the deed yourself Jimmy: don't need Bill rising from ⚰ pissed off about another rewrite Janis: alright, pair of spoilsports Janis: how you wanna go out then Janis: 💣 🧨 🪓 🔪 🗡 ⚔️ 💊 💉 🪒 Jimmy: lasses first, would hate to ✔ your fave Jimmy: loads you missed an' all Jimmy: 🏑🏏🏹⛸🔧🔨🛁 Janis: 🤔 Janis: probably 🔪 Janis: or 🔨 maybe Janis: most personal Janis: how about you? Jimmy: Depends Jimmy: are we gonna do #matching or different? Janis: You only get one Janis: I'll kill you any way you like Jimmy: hot Janis: 🔥 Janis: but I won't be cuddling up to your crispy corpse Jimmy: Fuck me, I forgot one an' all! Janis: I mean, possibilities are endless Janis: but 💏 🤵👰 🤰 👶 is boring and not worth mentioning Jimmy: don't try and make me feel better, baby, fuming I am Jimmy: and now I dunno if I want 🔪 for the wound 🎨 or 🔨 for the 🩸 splatter 🎨 Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: I'll stab you but not let you bleed out Janis: take some #aes photos and then 🔨 final blow Janis: there you go Jimmy: that's the cutest thing I've ever heard, you don't need to work on nowt Jimmy: 🥇 you Janis: I'd screenshot asap then, if Mia wouldn't call the 👮 like the concerned Karen she is Jimmy: [writes some actual cute shit that everybody will eat up] Jimmy: type that out and screenshot it Janis: nice that you 💘 yourself so much that you can think of all that 😏 Janis: [does though] Jimmy: piss easy when they don't know who I am Janis: yeah Janis: don't need to tell me Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: it's the shit they do know that's unavoidable Janis: like Mick Jagger being my dad Jimmy: bit rude he didn't teach you nowt about how to perform but I'll carry us both til you figure it out Janis: got the opposite in writing somewhere in this convo Janis: don't be bitter 'cos I'm 🥇 without having to do as much Jimmy: You're only that good if you can do his hip move Jimmy: and there's not gonna be any evidence of that about anywhere Janis: not that committed to the bit, rat boy Jimmy: there you go then Jimmy: take 🥈 and piss off, bad blood Janis: you piss off, dickhead Jimmy: or what? Janis: I'll smack you Jimmy: go on Jimmy: hit me hard enough and I can get out of doing our bollocks punishment Janis: I think not Janis: I'll go to the sick bay and you can carry cleanup too as you're so smug Jimmy: I get it, you miss El Jimmy: she is a fucking delight Janis: it's like she's constantly on the blob, which is ironic Jimmy: she's given 💀👑 her 🩸💦 and 😥 today Jimmy: if anyone's smug it'll be that pair Janis: unacceptable Janis: especially after I made smoking the opposite of GROSS Jimmy: we've done alright Janis: it'll be 🤯 come morning though Jimmy: you reckon? Janis: don't you? Jimmy: I reckon she needs to 👀 it for herself to be 🤯 Janis: maybe Janis: she's got form for being that bitch Jimmy: if we can't guarantee she'll be about in the morning, we'll have to do something when she is later Janis: yeah Janis: no need to put out the 🔥 before this bullshit trip is over Janis: even by their standards, not a good look Jimmy: right Janis: after that Janis: not got to think about them or that shithole for three weeks so Jimmy: you're decent at pillow talk, Jenna Janis: 👍 Janis: how do we end this Janis: in a way that still fucks them off somehow Jimmy: How do they get chucked? Jimmy: just do the opposite when you decide to bin me off Janis: when? Jimmy: Dunno when I'll be pissing off out of 🍀 yet Jimmy: but 🤞 you won't see me back at school Janis: I get it Janis: we used to move around a lot, when we were younger, I don't remember it much Jimmy: if Ian's still being a knobhead and I am about, do it then Janis: alright Jimmy: alright, give me a bell when you're on your way back to my door, I'll get you in without waking him Janis: he's a heavy sleeper Jimmy: how do you know? Janis: my cousin Janis: used to be closer, when we was kids, sleepovers n shit Jimmy: you should've said Jimmy: wouldn't have made you put on a show in front of him Janis: I don't care Janis: why he left in a hurry though Jimmy: do you want me to meet you at yours in a bit instead? Janis: can do Janis: more guarantee of seeing them then Janis: come to vet her outfit or whatever Jimmy: what time's Grace up? Jimmy: I'll be there an hour before, still give me time to get in and us set up if she wakes any earlier Janis: Our first thing is at 9, yeah? Janis: if she's having breakfast, 6.30, if not, 7 Janis: 6 should be fine Jimmy: 👍 Janis: get some sleep Janis: not enough you don't look shagged out, of course Jimmy: how you were going on earlier I thought she were gonna get up before the sun bothered Janis: I forgot Janis: school's earlier and our bus takes even longer Janis: she has to go to bed like a 👵 Jimmy: bet that goes down well with the lads Janis: dunno Janis: that's what weekends are for, right Jimmy: Dunno Jimmy: my ex near enough moved herself in Jimmy: very #goals obvs Janis: she don't last long enough to do that Jimmy: didn't need to Sherlock that Jimmy: goes without saying or sleuthing Janis: 🐇🐇🐇 Jimmy: shut up and get to bed Janis: rude Jimmy: is it? Jimmy: or is it thoughtful and 💕? Janis: put out a twitter poll if you like Janis: I'll be here not sleeping Jimmy: Alright, sod you then Janis: sweet dreams Jimmy: never said I were sleeping Janis: tell me if we're posting it and I'll fake enthusiasm at whatever you're doing instead Janis: don't want the sexts to be one-sided Jimmy: we should probably be together by now far as the fans know Jimmy: you're alright Janis: true Janis: mutual masturbation less of a flex Jimmy: Save it for the LDR Janis: you're alright, won't make you do it when you get home Janis: find a new fake boyf to keep them off my dick Jimmy: you can't dump me the second I do one, wouldn't be #goals Jimmy: starcrossed is our brand, mate Janis: awh, babe, you'd do that for me?! 💕 Jimmy: and myself, fuck all's gonna change when I leave here Jimmy: not just being racist against paddys, like Janis: if you go back, won't you have all your mates Jimmy: and what? Janis: well, you won't be new boy Janis: no one needs to follow you about and generally be a massive tit, like Jimmy: home's got bigger tits Jimmy: if that's where we go, and if not, new town, same bollocks Janis: well, LDR even easier Janis: can drop you an OTT caption whenever Jimmy: that'll be why I propositioned you again, my dear Janis: what does that mean? Jimmy: you said it, this is about making our lives easier Jimmy: wouldn't force you into an LDR if it were some 🎻🎻 hardship Janis: yeah Janis: alright Jimmy: what? Janis: I meant when you first asked, for now Jimmy: You wanna know why I asked? Janis: yeah Janis: me, specifically, I know why we're doing it Jimmy: 'cause I could do Jimmy: and we're both fit and mysterious, duh Janis: 👌 Jimmy: Go on, why did you say yeah? Janis: 'cos I'm fit and mysterious, why else Jimmy: 👌 Janis: forget I asked Jimmy: Why? I reckon it's what you'd call a valid question Janis: 'cos you didn't tell me anything I didn't know already Jimmy: everyone knows how fit you are Janis: not all wearing 😎 Jimmy: there you go then Janis: bed now Jimmy: save telling me what to do for when there's loads of dickheads about to see and hear how well I do it Janis: it's a polite way to tell you to shut up Jimmy: northern, not that thick Jimmy: take the compliment, dickhead Janis: don't need it Janis: my head is massive as is Jimmy: What do you need? Jimmy: 🚬? Janis: couldn't hurt Janis: what the packets say, right Jimmy: Close enough, come here Janis: [show up] Jimmy: [we know the drill he's lighting up for you gal, god knows how long you've been out there boy dealing the drama that is Ian looking after his own kids for an evening] Janis: [we smoking in silence] Jimmy: [what a nice throwback to the PE moment that started all this] Janis: [Ella stay away] Jimmy: [everyone leave them be tbh] Janis: [when so much drama has gone down already like the levels of not expecting this] Jimmy: [we are so rude soz lads] Janis: [we all know who's fault it actually is, and also that you're about it so Jimmy: [even if neither of you expected to be this about it and are now shooketh] Janis: [hence what is lowkey an awkward silence but both of you usually are so you can play it ain't] Jimmy: [so casual so fine] Janis: [again, not as if you've chosen to spend time together when you don't need to] Jimmy: [makes me lol same as all these convos you're keeping going beyond needing to, but we should say he takes a pic of her under the pretence of like hm idk when I might need this/ we can use it to pretend you're with me if you're not at some point etc but it seems so rude like oh this is just a job every second I have to be doing something I deffo don't wanna spend any time with you just because] Jimmy: [but we know she really just looks beautiful and he's an art hoe] Janis: ['could've warned us, where was my two hours?'] Jimmy: [😏 and offers to take it again with a gesture but you know he's not deleting that OG pic ever] Janis: [🖕 like have that] Jimmy: [😘 like he did to sir when he left] Janis: [wiping her cheek like it hit her] Jimmy: [does a really fake look around for fans lurking] Janis: [raising brow like you know its just us] Jimmy: [shrug cos it's so casual so fine] Janis: [shrugs back but OTT like one up you] Jimmy: [lights a new 🚬 because 1. he's been out there ages so he would've been nearly done when she appeared 2. to prove that he don't feel awks at all and could stay here all night] Janis: [puts her hand out like gimme your lighter] Jimmy: [does but with a raised brow of his own] Janis: [just playing with it 'not suggesting arson, s'boring'] Jimmy: [💔 mime for the first time] Janis: ['poor baby'] Jimmy: [pouty little lip like baby me] Janis: [loling but reminded so 'I'll bite it off next time'] Jimmy: [irl 🤞] Janis: [🙄😏] Jimmy: [gets a snack of some kind out like better eat this while I still can then] Janis: ['did you not eat enough at dinner?'] Jimmy: [🙄😏 but chucks some at her] Janis: ['too busy staring, I remember'] Jimmy: ['bit busy getting chucked out 'cause you don't know owt about being cute'] Janis: [😒 'yeah, that's why'] Jimmy: ['gotta keep it goals if you can't, yeah'] Janis: ['fuck off'] Jimmy: [looks down at his 🚬 which he ain't done with like no shan't] Janis: ['do it by yourself then' 'cos done enough with yours to throw it like good day] Jimmy: [just looking at her like bye then] Janis: [👋 '6 o'clock'] Jimmy: [when you get right in her grill and it's really hot but then you just take your lighter back] Janis: [making an 'ugh' sound] Jimmy: [hasn't moved away so is still very much in her grill and just zipping her hoodie up which is actually his like it's such a long cold walk back when it's neither because you gotta prove that 'cute' comes that effortlessly to you obvs and she sucks but it's just hot because the tension] Janis: [pushing him back, not really hard or anything but enough to ramp up that tension] Jimmy: [when you say 'piss off then' but you're saying it like a challenge not to] Janis: [just looking at him like nah] Jimmy: [LOOKING at her] Janis: ['stop it' but again, a challenge] Jimmy: ['stop what?' because I dare you to acknowledge that something is happening here, gal] Janis: ['you know' 'cos likewise] Jimmy: ['you'] Janis: [points at him] Jimmy: [signs it] Janis: [gonna assume she knows what he's doing but not what he's saying here 'hardly fair'] Jimmy: [scoffs because nothing about any of this is fair or what he signed up for 'playing to win, not fair' but shows her how to do it and what it means then adding whatever he needs to add to change it into 'you're a dickhead' signed which makes me lol imagining what that probably is] Janis: ['alright, Mia' but 😏 and going with this impromptu lesson here] Jimmy: [having a lovely time as if all of that didn't just happen] Janis: [tralalalalala] Jimmy: [it's literally an immediate headfuck, well done lads] Janis: [lmao how could it not be tbh] Jimmy: [if it was actually all fake but we know it never has been or could be cos he chose her for a reason] Janis: [you could've chose someone well below you and just played 'em] Jimmy: [thank god you didn't sir because that wouldn't have been as fun on any level for any of us] Janis: [you aren't that sort of boy is the tea] Jimmy: [my softest in my army of soft boys is the tea] Janis: [mhmm, and you wouldn't have said yes, even though it does benefit you too, if you didn't think he was hot and intriguing so] Jimmy: [anyway teach her the sign for goodnight and then do one please Jimothy or else I won't be able to stop you from doing something which only works if someone appears or you think they have which is unlikely] Janis: [literally got to see each other in a few so time to go lol] Jimmy: [let's skip to him showing up at 6] Jimmy: Oi Janis: [letting him in as a response 'cos obvs up and ready, likewise gonna make you be top bunk so you have to do the most to be quiet] Jimmy: [we know if he's slept at all it's barely so that'll look legit, casually stripping so you can leave your clothes on the floor for Grace and Co to see which means he has to climb up there in just his pants lol] Janis: [likewise, especially after-all that tension but always really, casually looking away so dramatically as if you don't have to get in that single bed with him now] Jimmy: [looking at her while she's looking away because she hasn't gotten any uglier since you saw her last and you're like well fuck this is gonna be interesting] Janis: [oh lads what have you got yourselves into, coming up and casually giving yourselves as much space as you physically can 'cos not as if they're gonna burst in the door any second now and this is just casual, taking off your top so you're in your bra and shorts moment] Jimmy: [when you don't wanna stare at her doing that so you're looking down and it hits you that you're topless too but there's not a single bruise anywhere there so you're like ! and your hand automatically goes to your neck but your foot nudges her] Janis: [turning 'round like excuse me 'cos think he's just being annoying but then you look and then look some more 'til you're like 'oh' everything whispered as per, so then you look down at your own body like, yeah] Jimmy: [to casually avoid following her gaze down her own body because ofc you don't wanna look don't be silly looking at her hands to see how long her nails are, like are back scratches too far or wtf because this is the life we're living kids] Janis: [pretending you think he means he wants you to choke him and going for the throat 'cos cannot be serious about this rn] Jimmy: [so 😒 because she caught you off guard with that and you nearly said something along the lines of oi or piss off at normal volume so you're mad at yourself for being an amateur] Janis: [gently pushing his shoulder like soz but also come on 'you can go first then'] Jimmy: [pushing her down onto the bed slightly less gently but obvs not hard lol and going for it  because if you start to think or say something you'll be like this is too much wtf is my life rn and then you're look like even more of an amateur] Janis: [when once it's happening, you can bite your lip all you like but you didn't expect the push down so you can't stop yourself from making the noise] Jimmy: [don't worry gal because that noise would have got to him as much as the push got to you and you'll be able to get your own back soon] Janis: [when you don't wanna tell him to stop but that's purely 'cos you need to prove you got this, not that it's enjoyable or anything, nah] Jimmy: [I'm loling because he's really just going to town on her as if anyone's looking that closely even Mia ready to be like I don't think you really hooked up because there isn't a love bite there, I'm so sure a few would get the point across boy but okay] Janis: [like, the state of undress you don't need to be in April cannot be overstated, the teachers are gonna be fuming at the state of you two lmao] Jimmy: [also you don't need to have your hands on her in any way whatsoever while this is happening but you clearly do] Janis: [we doing the most to stay quiet here, like low-key shouldn't you make a little noise so you can be caught but nah, eventually you gotta blurt out 'come on' but do you mean stop or hurry up or more, we'll never know] Jimmy: [when you take it to mean hurry up like she's so over this because there's a big part of you that thinks she's totally faking this, thanks for those issues parentals so you do hurry up/stop losing yourself how you were for a bit there and go back to treating it like a job] Janis: [we can feel the difference and we're, surely not sad, no, who cares, not you babe, in fact, 'my turn' and flipping him so you on top now] Jimmy: [wasn't expecting that after what she said and how he interpreted it so 'fuck' escapes and we know it's not in an angry way] Janis: [just gotta go in on it too 'cos can't be thinking about that or this will go even further right now] Jimmy: [time to bite your own lip really hard jimothy because not only is this gonna feel incredible but when she's moving you can see at least some of the ones you've given her so] Janis: [we're going so much lower than we need to, like they can fill in the gaps without you doing a hickie on his hip like] Jimmy: [RIP this boy cos he's got no clothes on and nowhere to hide] Janis: [soz for the blueballing] Jimmy: [great way to start your day you won't be 😒 at all] Janis: [when it could lowkey be an hour 'til they wake up like what are you gonna do] Jimmy: [not gonna be able to casually nap after that lads] Janis: [have to find a way to fill the time] Jimmy: [we know what you wanna do but no no, gutted that you can't even stress smoke in case you wake her up by going outside] Janis: [lmao drag this out for as long as you can without turning him totally purple] Jimmy: [at least you'll have an excuse to do more on her if she's gone harder on you so you don't have to awkwardly sit there] Janis: [we know you're just making out without making out, like, 'cos no excuse for that] Jimmy: [shameless] Janis: [truly, then we just laying here like, 'cos can't even wake Grace up really 'cos need the others to see too so] Jimmy: [we all know she's not the real target audience, so just awkwardly stare at the ceiling and calm down kids cos it's too risky to look at each other rn] Janis: [or say anything, not just 'cos volume] Jimmy: [mhmm but when you feel up to it Jimothy you can take a look at yourself in your phone camera because DO NOT look at her like it's just a job and you're checking out how well she's done] Janis: [when you force yourself to look in his direction finally, 'cos you don't want him to potentially infer anything from your silence,  so you watch him do this, and then position your body is a mid-fuck kinda position like, go on then and mime 📸] Jimmy: [at least he can throw himself into the technical aspects of this photoshoot moment like a nerd so he doesn't have to think about how good she looks or how lowkey hot it is that you've gotta just move her around] Janis: [we're all pretending this is purely business, taking our own 📸 of him above you with his] Jimmy: [casual excuse to actually kiss for the 📸 which you think will make this tension better but actually makes it worse] Janis: [so 😤 on the low like thanks a lot] Jimmy: [such good practice for when you have to keep making out and breaking apart in the future as the flat whites go to and fro and a flex that you're so unfazed by any of this that you can stop whenever you want because it's SO fake but such agony actually] Janis: [just staying on your phone like this is casual and you have other things to do] Jimmy: [when I'm gonna start a convo purely because he wants her attention lol] Jimmy: nowt we've forgot is there? Janis: don't think so Janis: go down and get your t-shirt for me to protect my modesty once they get here Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you think you're such a pro at cute, suggest away, like Jimmy: can't bring you a ☕ much as they'd think that were #ultimategoals Janis: missing your steamer? Janis: s'nice Jimmy: have to get steamy in the 🚿 when they show up instead then Jimmy: won't be as cute 💔 Janis: don't put yourself down just 'cos they replace serotonin with caffeine 💘 Jimmy: thinking of you having to put up with me in another confined space Janis: I'm not actually getting in the shower with you Jimmy: [really fake shocked face like what??!] Jimmy: tah for clearing that up, mate, could've been a bit awkward Janis: [pushing him like 🙄] Janis: shut up Jimmy: [mimes 🤐 as he pushes her back so that's lowkey sexy excuse you boy] Janis: [turning your back on him like boy bye but there's 0 way that's not a spooning situation so] Jimmy: [living for the excuse to touch her hair because it's in your grill] Janis: you reckon we should Jimmy: ? Janis: 🚿 Janis: or was you joking Jimmy: don't you want a bit of time behind a locked door? Janis: in an ideal world you wouldn't be there but yeah, 'course Jimmy: forget I am Janis: easier said than done Janis: 😏 Jimmy: 👻 Jimmy: shouldn't be no challenge in it Janis: you leave marks Janis: poltergeist motherfucker Jimmy: [does a there there pat on her back] Jimmy: should've stopped me if I hurt you Janis: [kicking back] Janis: yeah right Jimmy: [retaliates like oi] Janis: [playfight 'I'll hurt you'] Jimmy: ['go on' because we're forever one challenge away from going too far] Janis: ['it doesn't count if you ask for it' but we LOOKING at him] Jimmy: [LOOKING back at her because always 'weren't like I said please'] Janis: ['where are your manners?'] Jimmy: [leans way further in than he needs to for whispering 'not that good of an actor' okay we get it Jimothy you think you're so 😎 and a bad boy but you not okay deal with it] Janis: [when you 'ha!' at practically normal volume such is your disbelief at this, sir] Jimmy: [putting a finger to her lips like shh because why just say it when you could be saucy as hell] Janis: [biting said finger as if this will actually hurt and not just add to this vibe alright] Jimmy: [pulling her hair by that same logic] Janis: [matching that 'fuck-' energy of his from earlier but adding '-you' in any vain attempt at saving face as you take his hand from your hair and pin it above your heads] Jimmy: [1000% is allowing this and is about to kiss her so we're gonna have to say that like Grace's alarm goes off or something to remind y'all what you're meant to be doing here] Janis: [when it's fine that the 'shit!' comes out 'cos it's showtime anyways] Jimmy: [pretend to be asleep kids that way you can take a sec and a deep breath] Janis: [lowkey hiding under these covers rn] Jimmy: [#mood cos Grace is gonna be so shook that Jimmy is here] Janis: [like soz girl] Jimmy: [run to the bathroom gal, it's fine he's not looking at you] Janis: [just don't run out screaming tah] Jimmy: [do we wanna say that the flatwhites all assemble here to get ready so they have to put on more of a show or say they show up in a bit so they don't?] Janis: [hmm, oh, maybe for the drama they show up later like let's ride 'cos obviously they don't KNOW this has gone down so then Mia will be really pissed off with Grace like um why did you not tell us so then they'll be being dicks to her again moreso?] Jimmy: [okay I love that, makes Grace get changed because she's mad, fuck you fashion police] Janis: [something even more unsuitable, lucky you don't break a leg she's already clumsy you know this] Jimmy: [also OMG you know we said they should see Mia cheat on Pablo it should be the boy that Grace was flirting with when they won that activity] Janis: [deffo, like that's what you get] Jimmy: [but for now she's in the bathroom getting ready with music on so like enjoy your awks alone time JJ] Janis: [at least you can get up, 'cos you know she'll be ages, and open the window to get some air] Jimmy: [lowkey just waking your siblings up for school like oi don't be late without me there or sort you out] Jimmy: [*to] Janis: [putting his top on for now, even if it's purely to whip it off when the flat whites arrive 'cos that effortless ladies, cry about it] Jimmy: [like you could put your trousers on boy but we know you won't] Janis: [like makes sense for your purpose but it's so distracting] Jimmy: [clearly you hope it is cos you're still dying over everything that happened and don't wanna be the only one] Janis: [we know you both are but keep doing the most to hide it like that's even possible god bless] Jimmy: [just casually making himself so comfy in this bed she got out of like everything's fine] Janis: [shaking her head] Jimmy: [a look like what?] Janis: [quieter but no need to whisper fully 'do this often?'] Jimmy: [says the 'what?' this time] Janis: [eyes in the direction of the bathroom like, let's not give the whole thing away, yeah 'you know'] Jimmy: ['what kind of question's that?' because imagine if that was the life he was living just fake girlfriends everywhere lol] Janis: [shrugs 'you look very at home'] Jimmy: [🙄 as he makes himself even more comfy, like there's no way he could actually get any sleep til the flatwhites come but that's what he's pretending] Janis: [tuts 'my bed, you know'] Jimmy: [eyes closed and a fake yawn 'not a very #goals attitude that, meant to be about what's yours being mine, as my missus'] Janis: ['yeah, well, I'm meant to hog the covers, not you the entire bed'] Jimmy: ['come here then'] Janis: [human equivalent of ?] Jimmy: [makes space for her and pulls back the covers like you heard me] Janis: [you know this isn't a good idea but look weird if you don't now, like sure let's totally snooze mhmm] Jimmy: [deliberately chucking all the covers over her like 😏] Janis: [cocoons self 'thanks, dick'] Jimmy: [pulls them back off and you think he's gonna start a playfight or be a dick in some way but he just takes the t-shirt off her and throws it back on the floor as if they are actually gonna fall asleep and miss the flatwhites arrival in any way, we see you boy, how intimate and suggestive of you] Janis: [just staring, shooketh 'I might've been cold'] Jimmy: [tucks her back in cos you're a soft boy and you have to make sure she isn't just in case she wasn't joking and snuggling into her because 1.warmth 2. you don't know how long Grace takes in the bathroom 3.lack of space doesn't really give you a choice but to spoon] Janis: ['so weird, new boy' but soft and letting it all happen, obvs] Jimmy: [shhing her but even softer because their weirdness is meant to be a secret if they are gonna be goals and also duh it's sleepy time™ except not at all] Janis: [pressing back into him and turning your head back purely to whisper 'and rude' like gurl] Jimmy: [making a sound because of that movement that we can try and pretend is an exasperated sigh but obviously isn't] Janis: [shhing him like 😏] Jimmy: [writes some kind of insult on her with his fingertip than she won't be able to make out because it's the first time basically] Janis: [excessive wriggling like don't tickle me] Jimmy: [DYING rn so he can't even say anything or do anything but try not to die] Janis: ['shell be forever, you know'] Jimmy: [me just like oh no how am I gonna cockblock this and it's literally been a day lol] Janis: ['your roommate won't be up, is what I'm saying, if we've got any chance of getting a shower today'] Jimmy: [just looking at her because the last thing you wanna do rn is move unless it's closer to her but she obviously can't see you looking at her so you have to say something boy 'you don't reckon that might wake him up?'] Janis: ['I don't reckon he fancies you so much he'll get out of his pit just to 'catch' you in the shower, no' pausing for a bit before shrugging 'it was your idea, like'] Jimmy: ['my idea for when we had an audience' but shrugs back] Janis: ['I'm going then, before we do, be right back' getting up] Jimmy: [obvs going with cos he doesn't wanna stay here on his own] Janis: ['can take it in turns, I weren't saying-' gestures like you know, even though you definitely were you've taken his response as a message to cool down, getting your toiletries and heading for the door] Jimmy: [following her as soon as you've got enough clothes on] Janis: [sneksnek] Jimmy: [take a cold shower it's very much needed] Janis: [let you go first boy] Jimmy: [please don't take forever or she's just there watching her cousin sleep] Janis: [bit weird lmao] Jimmy: [imagine how awks when he comes out and she goes in and they just do that switcharoo that'd be weird too] Janis: [hope you've put more clothes on, you definitely haven't] Jimmy: [soz not soz] Janis: you can go back if you want Janis: or go, if you're over it Jimmy: over what? Janis: waiting for them Janis: we've done shit they'll see still regardless Jimmy: are you saying you're over it? Janis: I'm saying you don't need to sit there whilst I shower if you don't wanna Jimmy: I don't need to do owt I don't want to, and I don't need you to tell me that Jimmy: if you're gonna be ages like your sister, say so Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: don't get your hair wet unless you wanna fake some weird kink, we're meant to be asleep Janis: now you wanna tell me what to do, cam down Jimmy: you started it Janis: God, I was just saying Jimmy: just leave it out instead Janis: whatever Jimmy: it ain't my fault they ain't about yet Janis: it's not mine, either Jimmy: and I ain't being a dickhead to you about it Janis: 1. I weren't, I was literally saying go if you're fed up, how is that anything but polite? 2. hate to see you being a dickhead then Jimmy: 1. Bollocks weren't you, you're saying go 'cause you're fed up which ain't polite when we've got a plan and if we weren't gonna stick to it I wouldn't have bothered to show up at 6 when we could've just pissed about during this punishment Jimmy: 2. yeah, you would Janis: That is not what I'm saying, I'm saying I'm having a shower, that's it Jimmy: if you'd cracked on instead of getting a mard on, you'd be done by now Janis: shut up Jimmy: you Janis: I'm serious Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: stop pissing about Janis: I know how long she takes, you don't Jimmy: I don't care Janis: then I don't care how long I take in relation to you Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [obviously taking longer than you would have but nowhere near Grace levels of long 'cos just not that bitch, casually walking past him back to your room like let's get this done] Jimmy: [follows her again] Janis: [has got hair wet, suck it, got to pretend we had that steamy shower sesh we didn't have there] Jimmy: [is 😒] Janis: [likewise, we'll let the flat whites show as you're drying off said hair like 'good morning ladies'] Jimmy: [at least you can pretend you're 😒 to see them] Janis: [making some joke about morning coffee as you go over to him and hold his face, really like, get it together but fake loving upon him 'cos just so cute] Jimmy: [taking the excuse she's given you to kiss her because you've wanted to for an age] Janis: [enjoy, they're stunned silent rn anyway so take your chance kids] Jimmy: [we know that's why you're really 😒 Jimothy so it'll be an amazing kiss that Mia will just love to witness] Janis: [being so vocal in her disgust 'cos massive snitch and wants them to get caught again] Jimmy: [and not at all casually knocking on the bathroom door cos raging at Grace but she assumes it's Janis so she's like excuse you] Janis: [telling her where the nearest loo is, 'if you're that desperate, like' and smugly reclining on Grace's bunk so the rest of you have to stand around awkwardly in this room that is not big enough for all these people remotely] Jimmy: [Grace doing such an affectionate eye roll at JJ cos you know they being coupley af like she ships it so hard cos 1. she do 2. she doesn't fancy jimmy she's just not a dick to people who serve her coffee and 3. fuck you Mia] Janis: [just cuddling on this bed like y'all not even here and we're just having a moment] Jimmy: [whispering flatwhite shade that you can pretend is sweet nothings cos they'd be so annoyed they can't hear what you're saying] Janis: [giggiling in such an un-you way but it is funny, obvs] Jimmy: [Grace I'm calling you out for not knowing this is fake after hearing that except I'm not because you're not that invested and are just getting ready like a normal person] Jimmy: [shoutout to Jimmy for drawing yet more attention to these lovebites by touching and kissing them in a really soft way like oh I'm so sorry I've got no chill, I hope it doesn't hurt lol lol lol] Janis: [maybe that's how she be with boys, you don't know, let you off gal] Janis: [when you acting like oh my god, gotta hide them but in that LOOK kinda way] Jimmy: [I think Mia should be trying to get Ella or whoever to dob them in for Jimmy being there and Grace is just like chill so they're lowkey having a row in the bathroom] Janis: ['wanna go for breakfast?']