#am i making money out of this??? no??? you're allowed to have hobbies that don't make you money or aren't '''productive''' for work

[olderthannetfic]

Nearly 75% of fic on AO3 has less than 5 reader comments. Can we please acknowledge that lack of engagement in a positive fashion is the norm in fandom and that writers are expected to work for nothing in return yet readers are allowed to be entitled?

The source of my number

https://www.tumblr.com/transholmes/738776926733336576/and-even-those-numbers-on-the-lower-end-are

--

Hahahahaha.

Oh, anon.

Okay, first of all, I just posted a bunch of graphs showing exactly this, so not only am I well aware of it, but you also clearly don't read my tumblr much and are just here because some friend of yours is upset that I responded negatively to them about their dumb bookmarking opinions.

Second and more importantly...

No, no one is expected to do anything.

That's crazypants influencer talk where you think your hobbies are jobs that you have no choice about doing.

I suppose I do expect fans to have something at least marginally worthwhile to say—or else I'll block them for being whiny little bitches who make my day dumber as well as less amusing.

But mostly, what I expect is that people will do hobbies because they are fun. If I ever decide that writing fic is too boring, I will stop.

I write because it's fun.

I write original work for money too, and if you want to read that, you're going to have to pay Amazon your cold, hard cash. But I still do it because I enjoy the actual act of writing... at least a lot of the time.

What I see in the bookmark boo-hooing is a bunch of people who haven't noticed the last eighty thousand rounds of this same dumb wank and who not only expect to get the last word but expect that somehow I'm going to signal boost it on my tumblr as that... a tumblr known for contentious debates and nobody ever getting the last word till everyone's exhausted and never wants to hear about paper plates or beans again.

I also see that some of the thinnest-skinned people have fic patreons.

Now, I chose not to bring this up before because it sounds a bit below the belt in that "And thus you're morally impure and thus I can ignore your argument" way... But it's a consistent pattern in these conversations over time, and I do think it's relevant. The biggest sensitive babies are always the ones most afraid of bad reviews but also low engagement, and I think it's because they're caught in some half-pro, half-not limbo where they want the best of both worlds but keep getting the worst of both.

If you behave like a professional who is owed compensation, you can expect a more professional style of response to your work.

And what does the pro world look like? Radio silence. The occasional harsh review. Nobody caring why you wanted to write X or why you couldn't finish Y on time.

If you're here to socialize, you should look for a beta or a couple of good friends who like your blorbos and your style of fic, and then you can squee together about what you've written. It may not come in the form of visible AO3 comments. It may be in private chat.

In some cases, it may just be friends you can talk to about your writing but who aren't actually going to read it. I have plenty of friends who read different things than what I write.

That's what socializing and hobbies look like, dude.

It's fine to point out that many writers do get discouraged by low comment counts and then stop, so if I, as a reader in a fandom, want more, it behooves me to befriend writers and make them feel good.

But at the same time, writers get discouraged or move on to the next fandom all the time for all kinds of reasons. If the critical mass and the zeitgeist aren't there, then they aren't.

Do your hobbies for reasons internal to you.

If the main point is external validation, get into BDSM and find someone excited to indulge your praise kink. It will work a lot better than chasing fame via art.

[agust-june]

Let's talk about KIM DOYOUNG...

I just came here to say if I CATCH yall defending Doyoung out here it's blocked on fucking site. I need yall Ncitzens and Kpop stans to STAND THE FUCK UP.

Out here posting pictures of ugly ass snowmen with MCDONALDS BS. GFTOFH. I saw this yesterday but Koreaboo pissed me off and these tweets of these fucking weirdos made me mad. So imma talk about it here.

Imma post screen shots of tweets and for those of you that are clearly not assholes or not delusional, let's point and laugh.

Fuck the first tweet bc though he is not supposed to be making political statement. That's what he's doing. And I will drop that man like a trash bag into the dumpster. The SECOND TWEET FUCK KIM DOYOUNG'S FEELINGS. Fuck him what about the feelings of the Palestinian fans that he has? What about the people you are actively dying from bombs? starvation? Dehydration? What about them? Out here actively making SNOW MEN using McDonald's shit FUCK HIM. AND FUCK YOU TOO WEIRD ASS BITCH.

The first tweet here. It's not about his family or friends. Doyoung is in the public posting pictures of McDonald's snowmen. He's fucking weird. And if we find out about his family and Friends they can get the smoke too. They ain't special. The last tweet on the bottom...yall spend too much online into kpop. I need people to be educated and up-to-date in the world bc what do you mean does that country exists??? I need people to WAKE UP GO TO FUCKING SCHOOL OR GET HOBBIES OUTSIDE OF KPOP PLEASE AND THANK YOU.

We knew SM wasn't shit. We knew. Doyoung, I am not shocked he's in SM. I like to give people chances but once you fuck up you fuck up. And THIS??? Oh baby you lucky SM needs you for they check which is why I will not be supporting Doyoung and I will give you the Wendy treatment bye bitch.

Hell isn't hot enough. That's all imma say.

On that note, I want to add that as a K-pop fan and Ncitizen, I am greatly disappointed, but I am not surprised. I had a FEELING someone in NCT was gonna do this bs. For once, I was hoping to be proven wrong. But that hoes to show you... we don't know these groups. He isn't the only one supporting these companies. Other idols are, too.

Here's some links to other idols

I also want to note that I will be taking my Doyoung post down even though it had Johnny in it. I'm clutching my pearls like a southern white woman and leaving. I can't get rid of the merch I bought, especially my DoJaeJung albums, but I won't be buying anymore. I understand some of these idols are under contract. For example, New Jeans they have a contract with Coca-Cola, and they just had a meal with McDonald's. That I completely understand. But ACTIVELY spending money to McDonald's and Starbucks and posting it!?!? Nah, you gotta go. Idc who you are. I don't care you have godly teir vocals you're done. It's not that hard to TRY to do something good. I am actively avoiding Starbucks, McDonald's, actively staying up to date on what's going on in the world. It's not just Palestine. It's Congo. Sudan. Yemen. If I can do all of that work a job. Go to school. Watch One Piece (an anime that actively talks about corrupt governments, genocide, war, propaganda, etc). Kim fucking Doyoung and other kpop idols can do it too. They just don't care and want to keep rolling their checks (he probably need to with that pocket change he probably getting). I AM BEGGING yall K-pop stans who still don't get it to STAND UP. Get a life. Read a fucking book. Because yall look dumb as hell, and I'm sorry, but my EGO MY PRIDE will not allow me to be dumb and continue to turn a blind eye when I know people are dying in a genocide. And for those of you saying "well just educate the idol." Baby, there's a reason why college is for adults, and it's not a mandatory if grown adults want to make the choice to learn they'll do it. These idols are GROWN it's not my job to educate adults who are older than me, and it shouldn't be your job either, especially FOR FREE.

I hope yall have a good day today, and I hope yall stay safe out there!

[winterrrnight]

Hey! I love your work, Could you possibly write a Zach Maclaren x reader, where the reader searches for a roommate and she meets Zach and they start being roomies and like cute stuff happens and they end up together🫶🏻

thank you so so much for this gorgeous request! I can't even tell you how much I've always thought about it, I have so so many ideas for it, I am just struggling to put them all together in a good order, so it took me so so long to put it out, but, nevertheless, I hope you enjoy reading it!!

roomies (part I)

PAIRING: zach maclaren x gn!reader

SUMMARY: as your bills pile up and it starts to get lonely living in your apartment, you start your search for a roommate. little did you know, you will come across someone so much more than a roommate.

WARNINGS: none!

EDITH SPEAKS: this is finally out! probably one of my favorite requests I've ever had. this took me so long to write, and honestly, I'm still stuck at a certain part of it, so I decided to split it into parts. who knows, it may become a very amazing series <3

please please reblog if you enjoyed reading this! feedback is always so loved and appreciated <3

navigation || join my taglist || requests

You sigh as you put up one of your last flyers on a pole. It's been weeks since you started looking for a roommate who can move in with you in your apartment, but you've turned up with no luck. Whoever calls you up to be your roommate always has this one problem which is something you just can't handle.

One of the guys who called you up was a drummer, and as much as you love music, all the drumming throughout the day will not help you when you're trying to get some work done at home.

Another one is a complete party animal, and your will power isn't strong enough to wake up almost everyday to a mess of empty alcohol bottles around your house.

So you've made a tough but much needed decision: you will accept whichever person calls next to be your roommate.

Are you desperate? Extremely.

Will it affect you if the person has some qualities or hobbies which do not align with your own life? Of course.

But will it help you pay all your bills? Yes.

No more questions needed.

You come back to your apartment and find an envelope waiting for you in your mail. You open it up to see it's the updated electricity bill for the month. You've seen enough bills with an insane amount of zeroes at their bottom, and this one makes you realise if you don't get a roommate soon, you're going to be kicked out of this apartment.

You sit at your kitchen island, your forearms resting in front of you and your head slumped in your hands as you turn over the details of the current situation you're in over and over in your head. You don't exactly have the most high paying job which can allow you pay all your bills independently, leaving you with enough money for your university tuition and to feed yourself.

Your phone dings with a notification, and you look at it to see it's an unknown number. With hope heavy in your heart you open the text, and you're very glad to see it's someone asking about the apartment.

unknown number: please tell me you are still open to take roommates because I've been looking for an apartment for weeks and have had no luck. I promise I'm not weird.

You let out a small chuckle as you read the text.

you: yes it's still available. and it's okay I don't think you're weird I feel your desperation because same, I've been looking for a roommate for weeks.

You text this person a bit more, and you find out his name is Zach Maclaren and he's in the same university as yours, but you two have very different courses so you never saw each other on campus.

You both have set up to meet at a local coffee shop to get to know each other better, and you have been feeling a bit more excited than you should be. You saw his pictures and you definitely found him attractive. And if he helps you by being a perfect roommate, you might as well gain something more out of this whole situation.

You reach the coffee shop and just as you sit, Zach arrives. He comes up to you with a big smile on his face and even gives you a hug, encasing you completely in his warmth.

You definitely have trouble parting from him, seeing how perfectly your body fits within his, but you do and you both sit on the opposite seats of the table you chose.

"Are you coming from one of your soccer practices?" You ask, as you take a proper look at his outfit to find he's wearing a t shirt with shorts and some sports shoes.

"Yeah, I was worried the practice time might clash with our time to meet up, but thank god it didn't," he lets out a light laugh as you smile at him.

You decide to order all your food first, and then resume your conversations as you wait for it.

"You're telling me you love to cook?" You gasp and he laughs at your reaction.

"Yes," he says with a big grin on his face.

"That's actually so perfect, I mean, if you do move in with me, we can make a proper system of how one is mostly responsible for the cooking and the other for cleaning. It's actually going to relieve so much load off the both of us," you say, as you are served all your food.

Zach takes his coffee and takes in a big sip before speaking. "That is going to be great," he adds. "And we can do all the other stuff together, like grocery shopping or shopping for anything for around the house,"

You smile wide and nod at him, and you both start to eat the scones and croissants you got. A silence falls around you both for just a few minutes as you both eat, but it doesn't feel awkward, if anything, it feels so right. As if you're both meant to be sitting opposite to each other every single day while having your dinner.

You have clicked very quickly with him, and you're so grateful for that, because this might as well be the end of your long, tiring search of finding a roommate. All that is left is to get a approval from him, but you have a feeling he won't say no, because he seems very enthusiastic about it, just the way you are.

"So, what's the verdict? Would you love to move in with me?" You ask, your heart slightly beating faster.

"Of course I would love to! I have spent way too long trying to find a roommate and I don't think I want to continue to do that, but also you seem very nice and I think we would work perfectly together," he smiles at you. You immediately relax and let out a scream of happiness. You get up from your chair to give him another hug as you walk behind him, wrap your arms around his shoulders and gently squeeze them with happiness.

"Thank you Zach, thank you so much," you say as he laughs and gently holds onto your arms. You let go of him and sit back on your seat.

"There's one thing you need to help me with though," you say, and he looks at you expectantly, "so you see, about this month's rent..."

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

You finally get the last box from Zach's car and bring it up to your apartment. You keep it on the floor right next to the others and let out a sigh of relief as you sit on your couch to rest.

Just a few minutes Zach comes up too after getting some other things from his car. Just a few days ago, you brought him to your place to allow him to look around and explore. There isn't much to explore, but you were glad when he was happy with his bedroom. But he there is one thing he isn't satisfied with: your kitchen.

"No, you just don't have all the stuff you'll need in here," he says as he walks to your kitchen with a box in his hand labelled as 'kitchen equipment' as you follow him, concerned about what he means when you don't have all the 'stuff'.

He sets the box on the kitchen island and opens it, and you peek over his shoulder to find equipment you only see in those fancy cooking videos on the internet; something you never even considered of buying.

"Whoa," you whisper, as you see him pull out atleast 10 different types of baking moulds. You pick one up and see it is in shape of a skull.

"And this comes in handy when. . ." you trail off, looking at him expectantly, but he's just ushering around your kitchen to keep all his stuff and also rearranging some of your own utilities.

"Halloween, duh," he adds, turning to you and taking the mould from your hands. He keeps it alongside his other moulds in one of your cabinets.

"Your spice drawer needs a lot of work, by the way," he comments, leaving the kitchen and getting started on organising his bedroom.

You huff at his unrequired comment and follow him to his bedroom to help him set up everything in there.

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

You wake up to the sunlight entering through your curtains, lighting everything around you in a golden tint. Unlike the usual silence you hear each morning when you wake up, today you hear the sounds of pots and pans from the kitchen, something sizzling away on the stove and the string of the melody being sung by the one and only, Zach.

You go into the kitchen to see him with his bare back towards you as he flips a pancake (and your eyes wander over his back muscles flexing, but that isn't what's necessary right now) and places it in a plate of already piling pancakes next to him. They are perfectly round and golden, something you can never be so perfect at even if you tried too hard.

"Oh hey good morning," Zach says with a smile as he notices you have appeared by his side.

"Hey," you say with a yawn, your eyes still threatening to close. "Did you sleep well?"

"I did, actually, for some reason I thought it may take me some time to adjust to a whole different room and bed but I was very relaxed," he tells you. He piles the last pancake on top of the others and now fully turns around to face you.

"I don't think I've ever had such a lavish breakfast on my own before," you say as you take two plates and knives and forks and follow Zach to your kitchen island.

"Well, now I'm living with you, so it's lavish breakfasts, lunches, and dinners from now on," he grins. You break into a smile as he serves you some pancakes. You thank him and just as you take the first bite, you feel like you've been transported to heaven.

"Wow," you say, your eyes wide and your voice muffled. You never knew homemade pancakes could be this delectable. Zach smiles at your reaction and eats his own pancakes, both of you completely contented as you kick start your Sunday.

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

You reach Zach's room with your vacuum cleaner; as per your system, you are responsible for all sorts of cleaning around that house and Zach for the cooking. You knock at his door and here a 'come in' and pull on the latch.

He's going through one of his drawers to get a t shirt while he stands with just a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair wet as drops drip down his neck. He swallow the huge lump in your throat as you close the door behind you.

"I'm just going to vacuum in here real quick," you clear your throat as you peel your eyes off his toned chest and focus on cleaning. The humming of your vacuum cleaner fills the air around you, and Zach goes back into his washroom to wear his clothes.

"Oh would you like to hit the grocery store with me? I noticed you're out of some vegetables and other stuff," he asks as he comes out of the washroom.

You nod at his words and quickly finish up the vacuuming of his room. Soon you both leave for the grocery store.

You take a cart and push it around the store as Zach brings items to put in the cart. You spot some items you have never even thought of adding to your food before. Zach is quick to pile up the cart.

"You know you're hundred percent responsible for all the food bills of our house," you say, half joking.

"Oh yes don't worry about that," he says seriously, as he bends down to a lower shelf to get some sort of special sauce.

When the cart is pretty much filled to the brim, you both reach the self check out station. You stand at the side and Zach starts to bill in all he has bought, and just as he said, every single penny for the groceries came out so his pocket.

When Zach has put all the bought items in the bags, you go ahead to pick one but he stops you.

"Don't worry about it, I'll handle it," he says, picking both of the clearly heavy bags with ease. You try to say something, but you realise quick that there actually isn't a point to say anything; what he wants his way, is going to happen his way.

You follow him out to his car.

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

It's been just over a week since Zach moved in with you, and you've got to say, you've adjusted way too quickly than you thought you would. Every plan you make, every task you set, seems to always align perfectly with his own, which allows you both to do your own things in your own perfect harmony. He even helped you with your loading bills of the month, even though it was initially decided he would start taking his financial duties from the first of the upcoming month.

Every morning you wake up to the most perfect breakfast you can dream of, and Zach gets to come back from university to a spotless home. You both usually carpool and save a lot on gas money, which has started to make an effective change to your savings.

Zach's home cooked meals are out of this planet, and you don't remember what's the last time you ordered take-out. Everytime you crave something, Zach will make it at home, and you'll be left completely surprised with how it tastes even better than the take-out.

Zach loves to try new things almost each week, and you're now his personal taste tester (as he likes to call it), or his personal guinea pig (as you like to call it, because you think he's experimenting on you).

"You can so easily sneak poison into any of your dishes and bam, no one will ever know," you joke from your position in your living room, as Zach is in the kitchen whipping up something.

You hear him laugh from the kitchen, and you shake your head with a smile as you focus back on the book you're reading.

Suddenly he comes running out of the kitchen to you, with a ladle in his hand. Before you can question him about anything, he basically shoves it in your mouth.

"How is it? Too spicy? Too salty? I think it needs just a dash of cumin but I'm not sure if it needs cumin or maybe some, I don't know, paprika? Fenugreek seeds? I just, I cannot think-"

"It's perfect," you whisper, as you feel the earthy broth go down your throat, spreading the most beautiful symphony of flavors in your mouth.

Zach stops his rant and looks at you with his eyes wide. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, yes I am!" You say excitedly, as you get up and push him towards the kitchen. "This is absolutely perfect," you look at the pot full of the broth kept on a low simmer. You take the ladle from him and scoop some more broth from the pot and move it closer to him.

He gently sips onto it and closes his eyes for a moment. "It is perfect," he whispers, taking the ladle from you. You nod with a big grin on your face as you watch him add some coriander on top to garnish and close the lid.

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

TAGLIST: @runningfrom2am @saccharinesammie @maybankslover @totalswag @madelynie @chenslucy @ietss @elle-mp3 @viawritesstuff @wallsdreams @tahliac11 @sadfury @newsies-pape-girl @jamesbuckybarneswify @xxxlaura @thatsthewaythechrissycrumbles

(let me know if you'd like to be tagged in the future parts!)

[thewebcomicsreview]

Thoughts on the "comicsbrokeme" hashtag on Twitter?

Working in comics sucks, especially working for a publisher. Lumberjanes, an Eisner Award nominated comic that's getting turned into an HBO series, paid their artists less than I pay Carlos for Saffron and Sage. And that's not me humblebragging, the rates are that fucking low. If you're getting into comics you're either working for terrible wages and terrible conditions for a publisher, or you're pouring your time and money into a fire pit. Or you're straight-up getting your comics stolen.

Personally, I don't have much "industry" insight. The only job I've had in comics was writing Legend of the Hare for Drowemos before he gave up on it, and I was lucky enough to be allowed to keep the IP when he gave up on it (mainly because it's worthless, but it's not worthless to me). No company in the world would hire me to write a spin-off comic and then let me keep the rights when it failed, and I owe Drowemos a lot for that son of a bitch getting me into this fucking deathtrap of a career.

I'm extremely lucky to have a decentish job that I can afford making comics as an expensive hobby instead of getting into Warhammer like all the other fat middle-aged white dudes I know, and I'm proud of the small amount of success I've achieved in actually having a comic I wrote published in a physical book on my shelf, but the amount I've spent on comic art over the years could easily have been a car, or a down payment on a house. And if "get a full-time job and then spend hundreds of dollars a month or spend 20 hours a week drawing it yourself on top of the full-time job in order to earn less than $50/mo. in patreon revenue" sounds like a pretty pathetic result, consider that I'm literally in the top 1% of comics creators. That's not even a joke. It's not just that comics won't make you rich, it won't even be worth the time you put in, at least not monetarily.

I am this fucking close to quitting, and I've been this fucking close to quitting for the last five years, but I want to finish Saffron and Sage so I'll probably do that and then, like, get into making visual novels or something where the art budget goes further. There's a reason so many webcomic artists jump ship to like children's books or animation. There's nothing out there, man. There's no living to be earned. You're making graffiti on the bathroom stalls in Chernobyl and if you're very very lucky there'll be a dozen people in the bathroom with you hooting and hollering at your dumb jokes. And if you want to survive in this business you have to be okay with there not being a business, with making art for its own sake and knowing that even breaking even will be a true miracle.

[jeffbiblesupremacy]

JEFF’S INTERVIEW FOR GQ MAGAZINE

Translation below

On the roof of a commercial building, I invited Worakamon Satur, also known as Jeff Satur, to sit and talk in the evening around sunset time. It was a very hot day. The afternoon sun made me think the summer is closer than we think. But when the sky began to darken and the sun started to fade, a breeze started to blow and made me feel that it wasn't that hot.

If anyone follows Jeff Satur, they probably know that he's being an artist since he was 17-18 years old, when he joined the Kamikaze camp and he released his own debut song. Since then, he's been through different companies till he's found his fit with Wafer Records, which is under Warner Music Thailand.

Jeff's journey as an artist has not always been a smooth one. He even took a break of being an artist to do something else. But his turning point was when he got the role of "Kimhan" in Kinnporsche the series, making the 27 years old Thai, with English-Chinese descent, artist more well-known. Not only as an actor, but also his ability to write, produce and sing songs, allowing him to sing the OST called "Why don't you stay", which has around 38 million views on Youtube.

I invited Jeff to review his career path as an artist over the past 10 years.

"How did a guy named Jeff Satur get to have millions of views on his songs, a lot of fans and an international world tour during this year?"

I think there are a few turning points, such as Kinnporsche the series. I also learned how to self-produced my own music and I started getting involved with everything, including the lyrics and the music videos. I started to be more myself and have the courage to say yes or no. Since then everything has changed more quickly than my mind is able to process.

Like when I went to Jakarta, we stopped to see the fan project. I think I've come a long way and I feel like I'm living my dream life. Sometimes I feel very overwhelmed and grateful for everything that's happened in my life.

"Are you a dreamer?"

I am a dreamer, but there are moments when we can'd dream any longer. You know, dreams and hopes are the same thing. If you're disappointed, you better stop dreaming and start thinking what you can or can't do. You don't have to do big things to be happy, just having a hobby is enough. At the end of the day, we just work for money.

There was a time when I felt very unhappy, I felt like I was just living a life, so at that time, I found my way out by writing a blog. I'm a person who has to tell something all the time, probably because my mom used to tell me stories before going to sleep and sing songs to me. I've heard/watch so many stories through cartoons, anime, and movies, and now I'm able to tell my own. I'm glad I didn't stop doing it (telling stories) even if I stopped dreaming.

"Who did you get the storytelling from?"

My dad is a businessman who's very good at telling stories and knows how to tell stories in a fun way. But my mom is the one who always tell us stories, like little things every day. She also likes to ask us questions after we watch a movie, like what we think about the story and stuff. She took part in making us critical thinkers.

"At this moment, what kind of things you are able to handle and what things you're not able to handle well enough?

What I can control is that I enjoy the concerts very much, even though at first I didn't have enough experience. But as soon as I started to do shows, I felt myself. Even if I make mistakes, I just make fun of it because I have fun with the audience. I used to focus a lot about how things were right or wrong while I was singing, but I don't care anymore. And the things I can't control... I'm a sensitive person, so when someone is criticizing you or try to take advantage of you... I don't like that. Why do they speak bad of me? I just want to work and be happy, I just want to meet good people and talk about good things.

"But it's inevitable because you're starting to get famous"

Yes, it's inevitable. But it's important to surround yourself with people who like and understand your work. Don't put yourself in a place where you shouldn't be, put yourself in a place where you belong and you and your value is recognized.

"Are you worried because your success came very quickly?"

I prepare my mind all the time. "What if everything suddenly disappear tomorrow? Will I be able to live?" Because there are so many examples of famous people whose fame have vanished and they couldn't live. The most important thing is that I'm enjoying my work and the fame has no value to me. I'm satisfied with my work and the pieces I'm releasing so even if I lose my fame, the pieces will remain. I'm just happy to know that my stories won't disappear even if I'm not famous anymore. Nothing will be different.

I don't think everyone has to listen to my music and praise me for doing good music. That's what my mother taught me since i was a kid. I just want people to listen to my music and feel happy. Don't be so depressed because life is so short, only 4.000 weeks. For those who are listening to my music or reading this article, don't put yourself on misery. Get yourself out of there.

"So, what's makes you happy at this moment?"

My happiness is being able to sing and produce music, or even doing a photoshoot. Every job I do is telling a different story. I enjoy exploring everything I do. No matter what kind of job it is but seeing how my work change people's lives is really inspiring. I read it on twitter and through fan letters all the time. Some people were depressed or suffering, they didn't love themselves or they were afraid to go out alone, but my work gave them the courage to love themselves and love others more. That makes me wake up every morning and keep working.

"Do you think your work can change people's lives?"

I think art has that power, not necessarily my work but in general. Even the darkest job has the power to inspire depending on the person who consumes it. In the same way some movies can change our lives, I belie my music, my lyrics, even the series I do can change someone's life.

"What are your sources to find material for your stories?

I like to ask very strange questions. Have you ever played a ROV game? (Jeff turns to me). Some of the sentences that the game says are "the wind is strong", but we can't see/feel it. We realized the wind is strong because the images, the dots and some colors.

"There was a time when you decided to stop being an artist. What happened?

At that time I was 25 years old and I felt I was already too old for this field. If it was any other type of work, I wouldn't be considered old at all but I had been doing this for 7-8 years already and it wasn't working out so I had to accept it and go out and do something else. I was willing to do something I didn't like till the moment I could do what I liked.

At that time I was just making music, and I wrote on my blog, but I was starting to get worried about the future, and if I would be able to live without problems. I felt like I had a lot of pressure around me so I decided to give up. But in the end, I couldn't escape my happiness because I'm a storyteller. At first, I intended to create a website and even open an ad business, but it turned to be an inspirational website (laughs). It's like our dreams take us back to what we love till one day you close your eyes and it's right there, so just enjoy everything in the meantime.

"It must have been a lot of pressure on yourself to have success at the age of 25"

So much pressure (high pitched voice). I remember I was watching Mad Men at that time, which is about an ad agency, and I couldn't enjoy it because I was comparing myself and I felt like I hadn't accomplished anything yet. I was trying to convince myself it was just work but in the end, it didn't work.

"What did you discover from the show"

I understood that there's nothing I can't do, I'm just have to be open-minded and practice. The only obstacle we have is ourselves. I think you can do it if you step forward.

"Just a moment ago, you gave an interview to the GQ's video team and you described yourself as a weird person. I'm curious to know who weird you are"

I think I have a weird though process. When I was studying, I often failed my exams because I usually interpreted the question in a different way than it should. Also, I'm a person who likes to ask questions. I don't have a religion but I like to read books related to religion just to ask myself questions. What does it mean to live on this planet? What is God? What does it mean to have knowledge?

"If you don't have a religion, what do you believe in?"

I believe in God, but I don't have a religion. It isn't easy to explain. A God with no rules, nor love or hate. I believe in doing good things. If we have goodwills, they will lead us to the right direction no matter what. If our thoughts are wrong, they'll lead us to the wrong places.

"You used to dislike acting. What made you change your mind?"

Jeff: I didn't like my face on camera. I felt like I didn't look good and someone else should be doing that job. However, I decided to try. I ignored things and tried whatever was there for me. I found out that when I opened my mind to it, it was like opening the world. It’s also another type of storytelling too.

"Do you think you can say you have achieved success?

I think it's just matter of time. If I do a good work, then the focus on the work will come eventually, Last year was just the first step, and I'm excited about what's coming next. I think it's because I'm enjoying everything I'm doing, but I still feel like I have a long way ahead.

"You once said in an interview that "Getting lost was part of the journey". Have you found the right path?

I don't know (thinking). The funny thing about this journey is that I don't know what will happen next. I don't even know if I'm lost right now. I'm just following my guts. I feel like I'm on the right path and what's happening is the right thing for me. It's important to be yourself, in front of the camera but also outside, at least 80% yourself. That's the right way to be here.

"Throughout the ten years of being an artist, what have you learned?"

Be yourself. Don't try to be someone else. No one can be you better than yourself. If you have a skill, stay where you are. One day you will succeed without giving up, but there will be moments of suffering. Let's say you have to wash a thousand dishes. Just think about washing one plate at a time. Do it one by one and one day, you will find out you finish it. It's like reaching the destination you set. Just don't give up and lose happiness about your passion.

"Your lowest and/or heaviest moment in life?"

I don't have many. If something doesn't work, I just move on. I never cry over what happened even if it was my dream of being an artist. But I did cry over not good people who like to hurt other people's feelings. Probably because I'm a storyteller so I'm always sensitive to things like this. If someone hurts me, It will stay with me for a while but I'll go through it. I would say even successful people have a point where they're down or suffer, the important thing is how you choose to deal with it. For me, I will choose to talk to myself and write songs.

"You can write lyrics, produce songs and sing them too, what's the difference with other people who only sing?"

I do everything myself. It's the easiest way not to wait, just do it. Everything that comes out it represents me and being myself if the most important thing. I think that's my biggest strength.

"How do you normally travel?

I like to go out when I'm feeling down. It makes me happy to go to places where people don't know me. I like to walk without a destination and get lost. Let's say I want to go to a jazz bar but I take the wrong way and I get to the wrong place. I got lost but I'm happy because I got out from a familiar place. I don't like to go shopping, but I like to go to a quiet place in the countryside. Once, I went to Korea with the world tour and I went to a high place and looked out at the city view. It was very cold at night and suddenly I started crying because it's was very quiet. I felt like I hadn't live like that in a while.

"What are your plans for this year?"

Actually, I've been out of my comfort zone for a long time (laughs).

One of the things is to release my album. Also I want to do a world tour to meet my fans, but I'm sure there will be more stories along the way. Just keep tuned.

[separatist-apologist]

what the fuck they mean 'would given a five stars if...' they're thinking they went to a restaurant and the steak wasn't properly cooked? wild

Yeah, that sucked to see, but that's the culture on goodreads. You SHOULD be able to review a published book that way. If an author is asking you to spend your money on something consumable, then you have the right to leave your feedback. I'll DIE on that hill, along with the one that says authors need to stay out of reader spaces. I've certainly ripped books apart for having shitty grammar, glaring plotholes, and feeling like a first draft. That's the whole basis for #hatersbookclub

But fanfic is NOT consumable in that way. No fanfic author is asking you to spend money, nor are they doing it professionally. Its a hobby and so you get people of all skill level and ability writing in another authors sandbox. It's like a potluck- we all bring a dish, we sample others (maybe AVOID the dishes we don't like), and talk about it enthusiastically.

And I feel like there is some brain rot happening because people equate the two with, "well you put it out there for consumption-" which yeah, but not in the same way. I'm not advertising, I'm not backed by a publisher (or using my own resources to self-pub), like its just my hobby. Read it, or don't, review it or don't, but don't treat it like actual published books.

Leave it out of published spaces. I know there are some fanfic authors who WANT this, because they (maybe, I'm not in their head) feel like it's comparable to "making it" but you have to kill that voice in your head, the one that equates making art to external validation. If you want to be a published author and you're writing fanfic to hone your storytelling chops, I think that's wonderful- and don't throw us all under the bus for your singular ambition, you know?

I Know Places keeps getting put up on goodreads and I am so delighted people still love it all these years later. And I wrote that in between living my life, usually during down time at work. I wrote it, and then I hit publish and I didn't concern myself with combing through for every little typo or adhering to grammatical rules or whatever else. I just wrote what felt good based on a conversation between a friend and wanting to see how it would play out.

And it sucks to do all that work FOR FUN and see people treat it like its a published work they should be allowed to shred to pieces. Like making someone a quilt and they immediately launch into how sloppy your stitches are but then assure you they also like it. Thanks. Glad I spent the time, it sure does feel good.

Anyway, sorry for the rant. I've been keeping it to myself for weeks and it feels kind of good to let some of it out

[theageofsims]

Sims 4 Legacy Tips & Challenges (updated 5/2/2024) *Original Post: here

I made the original post March 24, 2023 and said I would update it at some point in the future. Not sure how much I can add to it, but I did my best to organize it a bit and add whatever I can think of.

Create-A-Sim

Don't get too caught up in specifics and/or think outside of the box and make a Sim that you're normally not used to making.

Pick Aspirations and Traits thoughtfully (and do not cheat to change them later) or roll the dice and have the game randomly choose. Another concept is to randomly pick them yourself with a number picker/generator you can find on Google.

Don't forget choosing Elder Sims is an option. Without mods male Elder Sims can father children. With mods, female Elder Sims can have children.

Lots

There is a limit to starting funds for a one Sim household (I believe it's 20,000) so make it count as much as you can. Consider lot sizes and lot prices from the start. Obviously some legacy players like to keep every Sim on one Lot through the years. If that is the case, make sure the Lot is big enough for an expanding family.

Consider purchasing a house and using whatever is left of the 20,000 to further furnish the Lot.

Relationships (Ways you can meet other Sims to begin your Legacy)

Send your Sim into the world to meet other Sims

Wait for the Mailman / Mailwoman to deliver the mail

Consider finding a roommate

Hire a Maid, Gardener, or Nanny (not sure if hiring the Nanny is possible without children on the Lot)

Hire a Butler (Vintage Glamour)

Send a Sim to work and/or University and have them meet co-workers/classmates

Wait for Winterfest and the arrival of Father Winter (Seasons)

Allow Vladislaus Straud to enter your Sims home (Vampires)

Use mods like the SimDa Dating App to find a date (LittleMsSim)

Offspring

The Sims allows several ways to have children and while some are controlled (adoption, etc), actually having a Sim give birth isn't always (unless you remember what a Sim should eat in order to influence the gender of the baby or the amount of children they can give birth to: twins or triplets).

If going into the birthing process blind, consider the amount of funds you have and the amount of funds you will need just if by chance you have more than one child at one time.

Occults (Most occults are easy to manage until they reach their teenage years, but some occults can be more difficult. I have not played with occults beyond Vampires and Mermaids mostly so I am not sure of the needs of Aliens, Plant Sims, or Werewolves at this point in time.) Check for guides on all occults and more about Sims 4 online (Carl's Sims 4 Guide)

Mermaids will not die if they are without hydration as it replaces the hygiene bar (Island Living)

Vampires will die if they are out in the sun and do not have the vampire power that will allow them to be in the sun (Vampires)

Pets (Cats & Dogs / Horse Ranch)

*If your Sim has a trait specific to one or both of the pet packs, consider starting a legacy for their animals as well.

Remember that having pets requires funds as well, but also space. A horse is going to need far more space than a cat or a dog.

General

Try not to use the money cheat

Consider not giving your a Sims a job that allows for them to get a promotion so there is no increase in pay or bonuses easily.

Consider gardening/farming as a way to increase your household funds especially at the start of your legacy, but remember that not every harvestable can grow all year round which will require you to plant things inside your Sims home rather than other or use mods that allow for restrictions not to apply.

Consider owning farm animals so you are able to collect eggs, wool, and other things that will help with the costs of food or hobbies that your Sims have, as well as allowing for funds if sold. (Cottage Living and Horse Ranch)

Consider owning pets and selling their puppies/kittens. Mods will allow for selling of adult dogs/kittens. (Cats & Dogs)

Watch your Sims for a bit and see what objects they interact with the most or which Sims they interact with the most to help better develop their personalities and what awaits them as they live through their Sims lives.

If a Sim reaches their end before you're ready, allow the legacy / game to progress. Of course if the Sim that passes hasn't left an offspring then that is where the legacy ends.

Some weather conditions can make a Sim burn or freeze while lightning can electrocute them so be aware if weather is turned on and your Sims happen to be sleeping outside for whatever reason. (Seasons)

[eveninglottie]

state of the charlie 2024

hello babes I know I've been quiet on here for a while, so I figured I would update y'all on some things I'm doing soon because while normally it would be bad if I were quiet, it's actually quite good! I've been having like, a weirdly great start to my year, and while I have been hibernating for the past two months I am gearing up to overextend myself soon getting back to work and I am gonna do the excruciating thing and tell you what I'm doing in the hope that you might support me (this is just the update. the begging will come later.) so, what am I doing?

first, I am going to be posting my book, wilderblood, here on tumblr! I realize that's kind of weird and silly but I feel very connected to tumblr and I am scared of trying to self-publish it right away. I also don't have the money to commission a good cover (that's part of the later begging) and I refuse to put a naked man and a moon on a generic night sky background on my cover. no shade to the people making bank with those covers but I just can't.

I will be posting it on a separate blog dedicated to the book (reblogging here, of course), so if you're interested in keeping up to date with it, you can follow me over there at wilderwolves. obviously there's nothing on there yet, but I'm going to be posting the first chapter in the next few days. I will also be restarting my patreon to hopefully make some money which would allow me to commission a gorgeous cover. also, for like. money in general. because capitalism has forced me to monetize my hobbies. patreon will get early access and bonus stuff, but the book will be free to read.

speaking of, I am also going to start making candles! super random, I know, but it's something I've always wanted to do and writing this book made me want to find something else that isn't writing that could allow me to do something fun with my hands that isn't playing final fantasy fourteen. it's called Wilder Candle and I'm gonna be putting it up on etsy so if anyone wants some candles for sad girls (gender neutral) that are darker and less cheerful than other candles, that's something I am also doing. yes the candle company has the same name as the book series. yes I will eventually be making self-indulgent candles of the characters of my book. no I will not be taking any criticisms at this time.

in other, non-money things, I have recently gotten back into dming and am currently running an End of Camelot king arthur campaign that has so far been WILD and everything I could have hoped for. my players are level 20+ and the game is broken and it's great. my friends are such freaks, I love them. I am also currently ill with what is probably the flu (but not covid, thank christ) and feel like my head is going to explode, but I managed to get out of my bed today so everything's coming up charlie over here. my cats are flourishing and they're beginning to tolerate me trying to pick them up, so really 2024 is starting pretty swell.

I hope your new years are not too stressful, and I'm really excited to show you what I've been working on. <3

[thebaffledcaptain]

No such thing as dumb questions, so might as well ask it…

Advice for one starting out in reenactment (specifically American Revolution/18th century) and I don’t mean acting - I mean things new people should know?

Great to see other people getting involved with reenactment—hope your search is going well!! Certainly not a dumb question—as I am definitely still a reenactment beginner myself, relatively speaking, this stuff is still fresh in my mind and relevant to me as well. Here's a couple things I can think of off the top of my head:

I'm gonna start with the unfortunate safety caveat: reenactment, as a hobby, is not the most accepting one out there. It's probably 85% middle-aged white dudes who have been doing this for like 20 years, and I'm not going to lie and say that it's a super inclusive environment. If you're queer, non-male, or non-white there is a very real possibility that you might encounter some Bad Opinions. There are definitely units out there who are assholes about ""historical accuracy"" and don't want, for example, women/non-males in their ranks because ""it's not historically accurate."" This is a flimsy excuse for bigotry. If any of it was truly historically accurate, no one over the age of, like, 25 would be allowed to participate, and we'd all have dysentery—which is to say, if they're assholes, find another unit. There are more accepting ones. The community is gradually becoming more diverse and more inclusive, slowly but steadily, and if you don't feel safe in your unit, there's definitely a better one out there.

In my experience, I definitely don't feel unsafe in my own unit, buuuut there are definitely guys who I would avoid talking politics with. That being said, I also think we have an awesome group of probably the queerest fifers in the British Brigade, and more than one well-intentioned dad who I absolutely trust to accept my queerness. Reenactment is a mixed bag, but again, you can definitely find the right people, and I hope you don't settle for less.

Next thing I would say is probably one of the first things you’ll hear after joining a unit: don’t buy anything without the approval of your unit! In all honesty I would say you probably don’t have to worry much about assembling a kit at all, initially—most units have spare gear that they loan out to people, often for long periods, so that they can get out on the field and start having fun as fast as possible. Now it’s probably going to be the old stuff that’s been in someone’s basement for ten years, but it gives you the time to put together your own stuff at your own pace (and reenactment gear is not cheap, so it saves you having to blow a whole lot of money at once, that’s for sure). If you’re hoping to procure anything yourself, ask someone, ideally a commanding officer, before you buy—not only to make sure you buy the right thing, but also because there’s a good chance someone in the unit might either be able to give you one, help you make one, or know a guy who could. A lot of reenactment is making your own stuff, fixing up hand me downs, and trading stuff around the unit (at my last event I straight up switched shoes with another fifer from my regiment…) so there are definitely less expensive (and in a sense, more accurate) ways to go about it.

Another thing I would say as a reassurance, if you’re anything like me and Generally Anxious about doing new things, especially things where everyone has been doing this for years and know a lot of things you don’t, and also especially if you’re by yourself: it may be “battle,” but the stakes are low here. My favorite way to look at reenactment is as a bunch of grown men dressing up to play war. As part of field music I was super nervous about my “performance” at my first event—it was before I had really mastered the art of, you know, consistently getting sound out of my instrument—only to discover that it really, really didn’t matter that much. Having a whole bunch of experienced people around means that you are almost never left without someone to turn to for help. As long as you’re trying your best to play your part, that’s really all anyone expects from you as a new member—you learn as you go, and you learn by doing.

And that kind of brings me to what I think is the most important thing you can do as a reenactor: be willing to learn. If there’s one thing I really respect about the reenactment community, it’s that they’re very, very knowledgeable. Everyone is here because they’re interested in the history and they love doing this, and a good portion of them are already retired and spend, like, all their time researching this stuff in order to present the most accurate impressions. The best units, in my opinion, are the ones that prioritize historical accuracy in their presentations—not in an exclusionary way, but in a way that makes that accuracy as accessible as possible. In my experience all you have to do to make a good impression is show up, be a decent person, and express interest—these guys love when young people want to get involved, and they do these events specifically so they can rattle on about niche history stuff to people who want to listen. Learning from them will help you with your impression, of course, but it’s also just such a wealth of highly specific knowledge from people who are super eager to talk about it. It’s hard not to learn something from them.

Anyway, that’s some of the best “beginner” stuff I’ve learned so far—I have another event coming up this weekend (very exciting) so I expect to learn some more. If you want more specific suggestions for a first event or something I’d be happy to come up with some stuff but I’m assuming this was a more general question. Either way, hope this was helpful and best of luck in your reenactment endeavors!

[frogsandfries]

I'm so exhausted.

Okay, look, I know I seem to be expressing a lot of physical exhaustion lately, but this is more in regards to my increasing exhaustion with what the internet has become: One giant, inescapable, smothering advertisement.

I probably only want to cry about it right now at this very moment because I'm so tired, but I mean, honestly, if I'm not crying over it, I'm seething over it.

So you, a corporation, you don't want to pay your employees fairly or properly, and you then expect people who can barely afford their rent, never even mind their stupid health insurance or any of the other expensive life necessities, you really expect them to turn around and spend every last of their five remaining dollars on your piece of cheap shit instead of a cheap loaf of bread which will at least allow them to get through the next few days??? Unlike your stupid foot soak boot things, hey epsom your tired feet while you clean your apartment after work--multitask, grind, hustle!! But also, treat yo'self and self-care.

There's no fucking point in having fucking adblock, because when I go to research how to get better at my hobby, google wants to shove a dozen more products that I neither need nor want down my throat. The only way to improve a fucking smart phone is to make it a better shopping device. "Hey look, do you see something irl, maybe during your vacation or just out and about for the day, and you need to buy it right fucking here and now?? Buy our fucking phone because it will help you have fifty afterpays instead of the usual five that you're constantly balancing at any one fucking time."

As someone who used to be curious to learn, I still remember when the internet was seen as a way to exchange knowledge and information, and sure, if you're really, really good at using the internet, or if you're incredibly resourceful, and lucky, and maybe find a group on like Discord or Reddit or maybe Facebook, full of people who share your general interest, and maybe they have the knowledge you're asking for readily at hand.

But it's bullshit. The more and more ads in a row, video after video, song after song, that I have to wade through to get to the information that I came here for, the less interested I am in things like Youtube for information and learning. I really have cut myself off from learning, because increasingly for years, it's been harder and harder to actually use the internet to learn anything.

The internet has become a giant screaming relentless bright flashing fucking billboard advertisement and I'm just so.......done.

Look, frankly, I miss having books in my home. Books aren't very reasonable for lugging about the country to your next couch. But that lifestyle is behind me. Books don't constantly advertise at me. The index in the back of the book doesn't make me watch a fucking ad to figure out how I'm supposed to be doing this next part of my project or how I can up my skill at this thing I'm trying to learn or improve at.

And whenever the hell I decide to leave my meat-suit, donate my books to a library if no one in my family wants them.

I'm just so fucking exhausted. I'm doing relatively financially okay right now. I have money to pay my bills and feed myself and still grab a couple things most paychecks. It is currently often a choice between improving my household or taking care of my physical body, or taking care of my emotional well-being, but that's fine. A privilege, really, compared to the places that I've been.

But I don't have the buckets of disposable income that the internet seems convinced that I do.

The internet was supposed to be a beacon of information sharing and a new fucking era of communication.

I don't think anyone foresaw it being a capitalist hellscape. It feels like I can't move through reality or cyberspace without being screamed at on all sides to spend out every last dime on things I don't want, don't need, and am extraordinarily NOT interested in.

I'm so exhausted. I'm so sick to my bones, my guts, my soul.

The thought of escaping into the mountains, becoming a hermit, never to be seen again, becomes increasingly appealing.

[kingprinceleo]

I cannot reply to things so making ANOTHER ask (Haha! I am in your inbox!) There are some fun hobbies that require little to no skill, such as book reading, birdwatching, walks outside, or like. I walk up and down the stairs in my house sometimes if I'm bored. Of course, I get the rut you're in. EVERYTHING seems hard, also I will destroy your executive dysfunction for you. Maybe if you're walking you can go for a simple goal? Like walk to This Building, count Five Daffodil plants, see Two Robins. OH OH and I find when I think about something too much it becomes IMPOSSIBLE to do. I will literally just Do Things before my brain has a chance to be a whiny bitch. If there's a library near you take out some non-fiction fact books. I EAT those bad boys up and it always gets my brain thinking about something else instead of the Hard Task at hand. That way I feel more refreshed, since I wasn't droning on it! Of course this is just for me, I hope there's someone out there with the advice you need!

Welcome to my inbox!!! I have set up a table with snacks and juice

Unfortunately the biggest problem is!!!! I . Can't leave my house. I don't have a car and I'm not allowed to walk anywhere. The only source of anything for me is in my room basically, and I don't have money to spend on enrichment for my enclosure (and I don't really, enjoy reading novels n stuff)

And I hate asking for things!!! The most I could do is sit outside in the backyard watching the birds, but now our stinky kitty meow meow tries to menace them so they don't come around as often >:( but he's cute so I'll let it slide

[dervampireprince]

8k Subscribers on Youtube?!

We only hit 7k two weeks ago what is this?!??! Thank you all so much. I know most of this has come from the new royalty audios and while they are both de-monetised by Youtube without any explanation, I'm so happy they've brought so many new people in!

Confession time: I made, for the first time, some year end goals at the beginning of this year. I've been aiming for 500 Twitch followers, 200 Patrons… and 10k Youtube subscribers. And I kept it private because I thought they were too high, espeically the 10k for Youtube one… but you guys just gave me 1k subscribers in two weeks. So maybe this is all possible. We're currently at 490 on Twitch (where we play games and explore weird websites on Fridays, and we use Magma so I can draw with you guys on the same canvas on Saturdays), 246 Patrons, and now 8014 on Youtube. 10k by the end of the year suddenly looks possible and I am so grateful to you all.

I'm happy the royalty audios have been so well-received, I plan to keep making them frequently alongside the regular original character and fandom audios. I've been changing up my Twitch streams by recently switching out from solo art streams on Fridays to playing games and exploring interesting, weird or old websites (eg old flash games, ARGs, picrews and more) and so far have only explored one website and I'm excited to explore more, but after I finish the game I'm currently streaming which is American McGee's Alice, a game I loved as a teen but never got the chance to play myself so now am fulfilling a little childhood nostalgic dream. And I'm so glad we've got people always showing up in stream and keeping me company, streaming for me is not a career it's just a fun hobby that allows me to socialise because I don't get to see friends IRL often. And the sudden increase in Patrons these last two months has been amazing! Thank you! Patreon is the biggest chunk of my income and you're money goes towards my rent and saving up to move out of my parents house and get my own place where I keep making content more freely. And I want to give an additional thank you to everyone who's been buying off my Etsy shop, I've been running it for 6 years now and the last couple years it's been declining in sales, and then these last couple months have been crazy! I've been selling so many Baldur's Gate stickers (honk) so thank you all so much!

As always with every 1k subscribers it means I will make a 1 hour long sleep aid video chosen from your requests. Usually I tally all the comments up and pick the most popular, unless it's a character that I've already done recently for a sleep aid. For example, the most requested character for the 7k sleep aid was Ambrose and Arden but I just did them for the 5k sleep aid, so instead I've picked the second most requested character, which I'll keep a surprise until that video goes up in a couple weeks. So get your requests in for who you'd like to lull you to sleep for an hour, it can be a fandom character, one of my original characters, or a generic boyfriend or royalty audio. Leave them in the comments below! And thank you all again so much! All of your support, whether you're a Patron, commissioning audios off me, watching my Twitch streams, leaving comments, or just silently supporting and watching my videos, it all helps me keep creating and, honestly, to survive. So thank you.

I know this got long. I'm really not good at not rambling.

[wntersinparis]

welcome to the Succession here you get to rise to stardom on the season one of the newest streaming show and navigate your life through fame.

interest check ! successionhq is a discord rp ( 15 muns ) based around a new tv show where new and old industry babies are starring in the all new hit show against their competing show 'down the hatch', while also trying to stay away from scandals and get used to everyone on set. if interested please reblog !

this group will have a capacity of 15 muns. each mun is allowed to take up 4 muses. this is a pretty chill discord group. no drama, general rules apply to roleplaying. standard rp rules. please be diverse with muses, don’t make all of them white when applying. the muses must also be between the ages of 20-26. muns must be 18+ and fc must be 20+. if interested please reblog.

APPLICATION

* ___ = fill in the blank ,, submit through submissions .

faceclaim, gender, pronouns, age, what status is your muse A to E List. ( timezone , age, name )

nice to meet you LAST NAME , FIRST NAME. i am your director, anita. think if succession lime the show dynasty, nothing but plot twists, scandals, and glamour. before we start can you let me know a bit about yourself? any hobbies? 3 HOBBIES. nice! anything else we would know about you? ANY PETS, PAST RELATIONSHIPS, PARENTAL STATUS, SECRETS, or FUN FACTS. good to know, i did see in a few articles with your name. once SCANDAL. that seemed pretty serious but there's also CHARITY EVENT/GOOD PRESS, so im sure we can work something out here. i see here that you are with AGENCY NAME. well please go ahead and start your audition whenever you're ready.

"oh?! im the idiot?! are you ____, can't you see... she never cared...all she ever wanted to do was ______ you for your money and then use the rest of us for cover. what did you expect. you bring some young ____ into the family and not think she wont use you for your money? its _____, really. you just got used, you ____ over yourself, the family, and all because ______, so who's the idiot of the group now?"

beautiful, could you please, read just one more monologue for me.

"do you understand how hard it is to ______. i work my ass off and yet everyones just a _____ at the end of the day. but noooooo god forbid i have an opinion or an actual fact about a situation because i'm only good for ____. like cmon, seriously...i bet if i ______ and _______ everyone would open their eyes then and stop being so incompetent. i swear i don't do anything, all i do is ______ and _____ and occasionally _______ , but theres no harm in any of that. god i hate this world...i need some _______."

thank you so much for auditioning, if our casting director is interested you will be receiving a call back soon.

[soapskneebrace]

I woke up, checked Tumblr, and now I want to kick all these Low Reading Comprehension anons in the face. What a start to the Saturday.

alright I have some Opinions too, if I may.

(1) creators are not talking about monetizing fanfiction. They're talking about monetizing THEIR SKILLS and time (and figuring it how to do so) .

(2) there's nothing wrong with someone monetizing their skills. People have to eat. There's also nothing wrong with creators suddenly realizing they can monetize something, and that changing their worldview. I had a similar realization in my career earlier when I realized cis white male coworkers were getting paid more than me. So actually in fact you know what would be even better to me... if EVERY DAY A CREATOR SUDDENLY REALIZED THEY CAN MONETIZE THEIR SKILL. This is the fandom equivalent of "talk to your coworkers about how much you all make".

(3) just because something is a hobby doesn't mean it can't or shouldn't be monetized. What kind of stupid cult/ victimizing/ keeping-people-down mentality is this. Hobbies are not mutually exclusive with making money (if a person does choose to do so). If you are a teenager and have been given this message, please start changing your worldview so that the world doesn't victimize you in the future. If you are an adult and you still believe this, girl I need you to reevaluate whether you could honestly be making your life easier/ better in some way.

(4) people who aren't creators need to honestly ask themselves why they're so against creators making money. Is it because they're afraid their free source of content will dry up? (**faux stage-whisper** YES) BTW I am not a creator myself.

In my opinion the bottom line is that there's a bunch of stingy people who don't create, don't spend time and energy creating, who have been sucking up content for free for years and years and ingrained it into fandom culture, and they're freaked out.

I'll address each point because I love that you numbered them, it makes my brain happy.

DEADASS

ALSO DEADASS. It is wild to me that artists are allowed to monetize and writers are not. We allow both, or we allow neither. Sidenote--I think screenarchers and gif-makers should be included in this list of fan creators who deserve to monetize.

I would also add, just because one creator decides to monetize does not mean all creators will decide to monetize. Not everyone will want to profit off of their work, either because they don't need to, they don't want to, or they are passionate about the accessibility of their work. Both types of creators--for free and for profit--have a place in fandom.

I suspect you're exactly right, but I must note, I do feel compassion for people who balk at the idea of monetized fan content, because the model we have for that is subscription-based. That is FAR more to ask of someone who might already be paying more than one subscription for entertainment. Unfortunately, it is also the most viable form of income for creatives. I'm not saying it's a perfect solution, but I am saying it would be the most effective one for creatives to be compensated fairly.

[yeahforsureokay]

I've been blessed with a good life for the most part. I've always been privileged.

Still, I can't help but resent people who have things that I want. Those who get better grades than me, who qualify for better scholarships, who don't struggle to decipher other people, who have people falling at their feet to know them.

I don't really want those things with who I am right now. I would give anything to, instead, put myself in their shoes, to trade in my conscious for theirs.

I want to be in their skin, in their bones. I want to see their family as mine and have them see me as theirs.

I don't want to become a man. I want to have been a man. I want to be a man. I don't want to become beautiful. I want to have been beautiful. I want to be beautiful. I don't want whatever they have. I want to be them.

I want to be someone who doesn't flinch away at specific sounds, who doesn't struggle with anxiety that cripples them physically. I want to become them, to have been raised as them, to have their traits, both good and bad.

Does that make sense? I think this playlist explains it well. I've constantly been held down by myself, like concrete shoes drowning me in the river. I'd give a lot to see someone else's problems as my own for a day, even if they're worse than mine. At least it's different and not the same cycle I've been stuck in. Maybe it'll refresh my mind and send me back to my body with a new outlook. Maybe it won't.

Instead, I sit in the same room. I sit with the same problems. I sit with the same people. I sit with the same flaws. I sing the same song. Over and over and over.

I dissociate at times. I'll take myself away from my body and my emotions. I focus only on the buzzing in my skull, the hum of life and death and everything in between.

I am grateful for the medications I've been put on and the help I've sought as I work through my fears. Every once in a while, though, I fall back into the same cyclical pattern.

I've decided to take up crystals and tarot and mystical stuff as a hobby (just decided it today, actually). I'm so used to constantly being skeptical and not allowing myself to branch out to new things because it doesn't "add" anything to my worth. I'm tired of that, though. I want to have fun like other people. I want to waste my money. I want to dedicate time to trying to control things I don't think I can truly control. I want to be passionate. I want to have passion.

I'm sick of waiting for some being in the sky to turn me into someone else. Maybe it's time to take myself into my own hands. Maybe this is the start of that. Maybe not. At least I'll be able to say I tried.

I wish peace and solace for anyone who may be facing similar issues. I also hope you enjoy the playlist and know you're not alone.

[yuusaris]

Life Update

My ~*Partial Hospitalization Program*~ is over!

TW: cat death, suicidal ideation

To the people who were able to help support me and my family financially for the bit - y'all honest to God got us to my paycheck without a single sweat. It was like breathing fresh air - disability hasn't come in yet and it was a daunting looking week. It was really, truly helpful, every dollar counted, every charge got paid without negatives.

Soooo part of the reason for my program happening - there were a lot of reasons that compounded over the year so far. Y'all might know we lost Hammond at the very beginning of the year, but what wasn't mentioned was that I have a hefty blame on myself for what happened, and I'm not going into details on it. I had a messy falling out with a very dear friend and my bankruptcy filing has not started yet because it's daunting in the face of grief. We also lost our second source of income this year (another falling out and another death), we lost another family member, my job ended up hefting more responsibilities onto me as well as the ones I had gotten away with neglecting and through all of it, I socialized with exactly zero people, zero times about it.

I don't have a family that's very... emotionally intelligent? Problems are met with solutions and pick-me-ups, not with empathy so, it wasn't like I was comfortable speaking with them - my dad distinctly said my suicidal ideations were 'selfish' and we are not on speaking terms at the moment because of it.

I vented to a friend or two, once or twice, but it always came with the idea that I was burdening someone. This perception of myself as a social parasite, draining what I want and leaving people dry, is one that kept me from talking to people I regarded as friends and also kept me from thinking well of myself in public - I realized in my PHP that I attribute my value to the interactions I have with people. Strangers, family, friends, cashiers. If it's a person, they determine my value. So I try to net a positive value as much as I can. Which means "not using people for my own comfort or assurance or entertainment" - the aware people reading this may recognize that as 'an attribute of friendship that friends are there for'. I still haven't gotten around to talking to some of my online friends yet and - I don't have many in real life. I work from home, and left my home state in 2019 to be with my husband and his family, it felt a lot like they were tolerating me because of him. Even though I knew they weren't.

I don't really have any hobbies that aren't something to show off either - I write fic for me, but I haven't posted anything all year because I've had so little investment in my productive hobbies... of which writing is the only one. And when I don't have that I have video games until my eyeballs bleed.

I'm writing this all out to both shake myself of the idea that this is me infodumping in order to "manipulate you all into giving money in the future" (I'm aware I'm not, and I am not), or "make people say nice things about me while I do nothing for them to soothe my ego" (I can want validation/nice things said that make me feel good without treatijng people badly or it being about my value) or "just wanna read my own writing voice" (There's also just - nothing wrong with that??) or any other bad things.

It's just... my blog and my journey and I wanted to level with the people who care about me here about what's been going on and where I'm at and that... I dunno. That I'm a work in progress? And everyone is? And asking for help regardless of from who or what is different from mooching off people because the intent and the care for those people is entirely different and if you're really a burden, they wouldn't help you and I need to get it in my head that I'm just - allowed to talk to people about things that are wrong or sad or just even ask if even online peeps like y'all wanna do online stuff is still - social and allowed to be asked from me and not just of me and - lots of stuff.

And I'm allowed to do things on my own and talk to new people without feeling like a weirdo and a wretch cuz I'm not a weirdo and a wretch and typing and posting that this is how I feel is not guilt-tripping nor is it infodumping because it's my blog and my negative thoughts that aren't true. And I'm allowed to say they're not.

....

I'm gunna be doing an Intensive Outpatient Program starting tomorrow - it's similar, but shorter and less days of the week. By the time I start, disability should kick in, and I might even be able to apply for disability for the work hours I miss. I'll be looking into that on Monday.

In the meantime - I'm making Magic: The Dathering decks again! I'm gunna try to start an indoor garden - I'm embracing possibly becoming a Green Witch, but it's hard to find witchcraft stuff that doesn't refer to God or Goddesses - and deity-on-a-level-above-me worship, I've learned, is... pretty triggering for me, regarding practicing faith. We also got - so, in January, we got our baby Jungle, and in April we got Sandy and Sandy's training to be our ESA, and I wanna talm to taylor about if I can post pictures but the point is, I am a cat mama again, and they make me feel worthwhile in a way that's not about my value but is about my feeling fulfilled.

So - things are looking up! I'm going to more library programs as well, visiting old haunts and getting back into socializing outside but also - maybe online spaces soon as well. Becoming a person again, y'know?

Really - thank everyone, bumpers and likers and doners, for everything. It meant a lot to be able to ask for help and get it and know that I can just... ask people for things, not even money, just.... for help.

Thanks.