#and I'm 31 and you think I'd be over that shit by now but according to my dreams? nah.

[iamnotawomanimagod]

sometimes seemingly small shit will stick with you forever. when I was a teenager, my parents were drunk all the time and neither could nor would give me rides to places I wanted to go. so if I wanted to go see friends, do an after-school activity, or get a part-time job, I had to rely on the kindness of my friends/acquaintances (or, in reality, their parents) to be able to leave my house. and I hated being at home, because of the aforementioned constant drunkenness of my parents.

I'm 31. it's been almost 15 years since I've been in that situation. if I get stuck somewhere, I can call my husband. worst case, I have a cell phone and money and I could do a rideshare. more importantly, I drive now and I have my own car. I'm never stuck anywhere. I don't have to rely on the kindness of people who aren't responsible for my well-being. I'm safe, I'm safe, I'm safe.

and yet one of my most frequent stress dreams is being stuck somewhere. not having a ride home. having to walk in the dark and cold after school. being stuck with drunk people and having no escape. getting lost by taking the bus.

my parents were pretty shitty, but even still, I have to wonder - if they knew then that I'd still be having nightmares about this in my 30s, would they have tried harder? could they have? I don't know. addiction is a monster and addicts often make for shitty parents.

I just wish I could go back in time and give myself a ride. I guess I can do that now. but that doesn't stop the nightmares.

[toomanyfandoms02]

Writing prompts!

So I just reached 100 followers and I am BEYOND happy YALL. So heres 100 prompts for people to send me asks with! Send as many numbers as you want in one and I'll make a blurb from it. (And by blurb I mean I will grow attatched to your request and write a whole fic on it probably lmao) THIS WAS PREVIOUSLY MY 100 FOLLOWER THIBG BUT IM BRINGING PROMPTS BACK FOR REQUESTS.

FYI no matter when you are seeing this, request. I don't care. I'm always up for inspiration. :))))

If it has a star next to it, I came up with it on my own.

These probably wont be blurbs and will be longer!

I'm currently writing for >>>>

Breakfast Club

HARRY POTTER

Spencer Reid / MGG

The Maze Runner

Buzzfeed Unsolved

Spiderman

Barry Allen

Theres a list of who I write best for on my page!! ^^^^

1. "I told you not to read that."

2. "Sir, this is for children only."

3. "Are you kidding me? We're not 'fine'!"

4. "Whatever you're going to ask, the answer is no!"

5. "Hey... what's wrong with your face?"

6. "You look a lot different from your profile picture."

7. "Are you going to keep walking by my house, or are you going to come in?"

8. "Dude, it's three in the morning."

9. "I can't believe I use to think he was attractive."

10. "Actually, you *are* speaking to the manager."

11. "This isn't going to be a typical best man's speech."

12. "According to this, you owe them eighty thousand dollars."

13. "That's the worst reason I've ever heard to have a baby."

14. "I didn't even recognize you!"

15. "You're Satan."

16. "I need a place to stay."

17. "It's six o'clock in the morning, you're not having vodka."

18. "Safety first. What are you? FIVE?"

19. "This is girl talk, so leave."

20. "You're bleeding all over my carpet."

21. "Just smile, I really need to see you smile right now."

22. "Hold still."

23. "You're not interested, are you?"

24. "Oh honey, I'd never be jealous of you."

25. "I'm telling you, I'm haunted."

26. "Touch her again and I'll break your wrist."

27. "Don't look behind you, hurt that guy is checking you out."

28. "I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend."

29. "Quick! Kiss me!"

30. "Just shut up and kiss me."

31. "I hate high school reunions."

32. "I think I picked up your coffee by mistake."

33. "I've never felt this way before... and it scares the shit out of me."

34. "Wait a second, are you jealous?"

35. "This is by far the stupidest plan you've ever had. Of course I'm in."

36. "You never told me you had a fucking twin."

37. "Am I suppose to be scared of you?"

38. "You're hiding something from me."

39. "A wedding?"

40. "Where would someone hide in a town like this?"

41. "H-how long have you been standing there?"

42. "Is this skirt suppose to be this short? I kinda feel like a french whore" *

43. "Oh fuck off."

44. "When did you take that?"

45. "I hid it."

46. "Stop trying to look cool in paparazzi pictures, you look like a dumbass." *

47. "Can you stop laughing?"

48. "You look like a reptile from this angle. Lizard? Snake? Turtle? I just can't decide." *

49. "You have a dirty mind."

50. "You guys are lame."

51. "I don't know. Resurrection maybe?"

52. "This is a safe space." "What the hell are you talking about?" "SAFE SPACE!"

53. "Just stab him."

54. "I'm in dire need of assistance."

55. "I'm gonna die in an elevator full of idiots."

56. "Shoot me."

57. "I feel like you know." *

58. "You're making me dizzy."

59. "I don't want any excuses, they must have the hottest date ever."

60. "Are you with him because it's easy?"

61. "Dibs!" *

62. "If we die, I'm going to kill you."

63. "Do you think you could just go *one* day without pissing me off?"

64. "Your hands are really soft." *

65. "We've become the clingy newlyweds you've always complained about."

66. "Pregnant?"

67. "We are SO much cuter than them."

68. "Wanna go for a drive?"

69. "Is there a reason you're blushing like that?"

70. "Sleep over? Please?"

71. "Are we on a date right now?"

72. "Am I your lockscreen?" "You weren't suppose to see that."

73. "Well I think you're beautiful."

74. "Your feet are so cold!"

75. "You come here often?" "Well I work here, so I'll have to say yes."

76. "You met me yesterday though?" "Yes, and I would die for you in one second. Next question."

77. "I can't stop smiling."

78. "Did you see it?"

79. "Don't leave me alone."

80. "Have you ever kissed anyone before?"

81. "You didn't tell me your friend was cute! Now what am I gonna do?"

82. "How can you drink that stuff?"

83. "Stop apologizing for other people! You aren't the shitty one!"

84. "I just wanna be swept off my feet. Is that so much to ask?"

85. "Oh, my ankle! It must be broken!" *wink wink*

86. "These heels are peeling off my **skin**. But yes, keep complaing about your tie you whine ass." *

87. "I don't want to ruin your party."

88. "Could you just come get me?"

89. "Now I have to start counting all over again!"

90. "Do you talk to your mother with that mouth?"

91. "You are very endearing while you are half-asleep."

92. "But I want to hear you sing!"

93. "No- Mom- don't tell him I said that. Wait!" *

94. "And you wonder why you are still single."

95. "Somebodys cranky." "Somebody needs to shut up."

96. "She's hot. But she's evil."

97. "Pinky promise!"

98. "I'd rather jump out that window. But thanks." *

99. "Hello, sunshine."

100. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

BONUS:

Prompts based on things my best friend has said (changed a little bit for context)

1b. "Man, I hope this ice melts soon."

2b. "Holy SHIT the Disney World parking lot is packed."

3b. "Those tree lights are burning my retinas."

4b. "These are fun to work with." "Not to eat." "No!"

5b. "I mean, I could hit a kid with a car."

6b. "You up? I need to call you! It's not bad it's just kinda funny!"

7b. "Wow I can't imagine being that rich! How old are the kids, maybe I can date one."

8b. "The oldest I would go? 98 I think, for money purposes."

Thank you guys so much. I love you all. SEND ME THOSE ASKS!!!

[fearlyssa]

Something to consider

In honor of Karlie’s birthday today here’s something for those who don't believe Taylor could be with Karlie because they chose to only believe Taylor’s own words: a list of the lyrics on Reputation (Taylor’s own words) that reference Karlie vs those that reference Joe. I tried my best to be impartial and include everything on both sides but just a warning it’s SUPER long! So if you don’t feel like reading it or don’t have the time then keep scrolling. But for anyone who’s interested here’s what I came up with (including explanations of the references and links if I have them; feel free to disagree or add any I missed, I tried to think of everything so I realize some may be a bit of a stretch)

Lyrics that point to Karlie:

Ready for it:

1. Younger than my exes (she’s 26 today, younger than most people Taylor has supposedly dated, male or female)

2. No one has to know (they’re closeted)

End Game:

3. We got big reputations (they’re both famous; Joe was relatively unknown until recently)

4. You and me would be a big conversation (they’re both famous and both women who are supposedly dating men so if they were found out - at least right now - it would cause a scandal)

Don't blame me:

5. I would cross the line, I would waste my time, I'd lose my mind

6. For you I would fall from grace, just to touch your face (This applies to the line above as well; her reputation would be ruined if people found out she was lying about her dating life causing her to “fall from grace” but she loves her enough to risk it by continuing to date her secretly)

7. I once was poison ivy but now I’m your Daisy (at first listen this line might sound like nothing more than a Mavel and/or Great Gatsby reference but according to this person they both like Marvel comics and check out how the daisy she drew in the handwritten lyrics in one of the Reputation magazines looks just like the one Karlie posted from their Big Sur trip in 2014. 👀

Delicate:

8. Dark jeans and your Nikes (she models for Adidas now but was doing Nike ads when they met)

9. Never seen that color blue (maybe a stretch but Karlie's eyes are a shade of green that can sometimes look blue so that may be a shade of blue she's never seen before. And I won’t add this to the list because it’s not Karlie-specific but the girls back home line is also not necessarily straight as lesbians and bisexuals, just like guys, date women and ‘back home’ can reference anyone who’s not from exactly where you’re from. They’re from different parts of the country for instance)

So it goes:

10. All eyes on us (they're both famous, have been on stage together three times and used to often be seen together by paps in public - which I do believe was on purpose; this line reminds me of the chorus of This is what you came for too)

11. Lipstick on your face (there's candids of Karlie with lipstick smudged on her face in pictures with Taylor from July 14th 2014 - as well as pictures of Taylor from her 25th birthday - and I believe another day too -, where she’s with Karlie and has on one shade of lipstick but a while has Karlie’s shade of lipstick smudged over hers and vice versa. Note how their lipstick looks in the top two photos from her birthday party compared vs the bottom two)

Gorgous:

12. I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk (the weird way Karlie says important)

13. Your magnetic field being a little too strong (they’re very physically affectionate with each other and often bump shoulders when sitting next to each other as if they literally have magnets in them)

14. I got a boyfriend, he's older than us (she often dates guys older than her and Karlie is younger than them and her. Imo it refers to her bearding with Calvin specifically)

15. You’re so Gorgeous I can’t say anything to your face (At VSFS 2013 where they first met Taylor looks in awe of her like she doesn’t know what to say. She definitely looks like she thinks she’s gorgeous and while the term could refer to anyone, it's usually a female descriptor and she's literally a model for a living who is known for her beauty and has, seemingly on purpose, used the word on IG right around when the song came out. And on an unrelated note I also want to point out that the ‘If you got a girlfriend’ line is not strictly male-oriented so although it’s not specifically Karlie-related it could still apply to a bisexual or lesbian woman)

King of my heart:

16. like trying on clothes (another somewhat female reference and she's a model so she does that for a living so therefore even more often than most people)

17. Move to me like a Motown beat (As mentioned in the caption of their IG post about it she & Karlie listened to Motown while getting ready for the Met Gala in 2014 so it's safe to say they’re both fans of the genre and enjoy listening to it together)

18. American queen (I know they're both American but Karlie has referred to her as an American dream before which you'll notice was the original lyrics when Taylor was writing & recording the song)

19. Your love is a secret I'm hoping, praying, dying to keep (this is pretty obvious but if she’s closeted then her love life is obviously a secret she’d want to keep)

20. Drinking beer out of plastic cups (I know this line is pretty general and she seems to be referring to a different time when she was up on a roof but it should be noted that the only time she’s been seen drinking beer in a plastic cup prior to the album coming out she was with Karlie)

Dress:

21. Our secret moments in a crowded room, they got no idea about me and you (you can see them having private moments at events in candid photos and videos such at award shows, the VSFS and at the 1975 concert. All times when tons of people were around but didn’t seem to notice or care if they were affectionate with each other because everyone knows they’re close and just thinks they’re friends)

22. Golden tattoo (they wore them together at Drake's birthday party last October. And maybe this is reaching but some of them were stars and “gold star” lesbians are those who have never “been with” a man, Idk about Taylor, but Karlie is rumored to be one.)

23. I don't want you like a best friend (they’re known as best friends so that one’s obvious)

24. I’m spilling wine in the bathtub (in the photo of her and Karlie getting ready for the Met Gala in 2014 you can see that Taylor has drunk wine in the bathroom with Karlie before)

25. Everyone thinks that they know us but they know nothing (A common problem when you’re famous because a lot of people know OF you but don’t really KNOW you or your relationships like they might think they do. She also references this in the album prologue but when it comes to Joe, not many people knew of him before he dated her so he doesn’t have a big reputation or people who think they know him) Dancing with our hands tied:

26. I loved you in secret (again sounds like it references being closeted)

27. 25 years old (Karlie’s age up until today and *almost* Taylor’s age when Kissgate happened)

28. People started talking putting us through our paces (again sounds like it refers to Kissate; people didn't talk about her and Joe, only the media did months later when the album was already finished and she says never to believe them anyway. Plus you have to wonder how they already knew of her secret relationship with him even before pictures had come out of them together)

29. I had a bad feeling...but we were dancing, dancing with our hands tied (they were dancing closely/kind of kissing at a 1975 concert in 2014 and someone got a video and pictures that made it into many articles starting Kissgate. You can see in pictures how upset Karlie and their friends looked walking back from the concert that night carrying a very drunk Taylor. Maybe she knew there'd be a shit storm about it the next day but didn't care and did it anyway because she was so drunk. Their hands would then have been tied metaphorically speaking and they would’ve had to do what they had to do which was to keep dating guys publicly and to stop being seen alone together)

30. I loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would decide us (as the world sometimes tries to do with gay relationships, not so much straight ones)

31. So baby can we dance, oh through an avalanche (same points as above ^)

Call it what you want:

32. My baby's fit like a daydream (I know "fit" is English slang but still, Karlie is quite physically fit - she literally ran a marathon like the day after the song came out and in the Vouge Best friends video Taylor mentions her shiny abs)

33. Walking with his head down (I realize she's not a man but being as tall as she is she does do that a lot)

34. So call it what you want, yeah, call it what you want to (some people say they're friends, others say they're in a romantic relationship, a lot of people think they broke up or are no longer friends and don’t even talk anymore etc.)

New Year's Day:

35. This is maybe a slight stretch but the references to a girl's party and polaroids that she often takes with her friends make me think of women and not really men, and as someone whose been to her house I can vouch that she has a lot of polaroids of her female friends; many of Karlie specifically displayed in her sitting room as well as a photo of them at Big Sur that she keeps in one of her bathrooms but not as many photos of guys who it’s hard to imagine would fit in all that well at a party like that but maybe that’s just me)

lyrics that refer to Joe:

In general:

1. The words he, him & his (and anything else masculine-sounding like the word handsome and king in reference to a current relationship. I guess this is a bunch of references but I didn’t actually count how many times she said he on the album because that would be a lot. lol):

Ready for it:

2. Younger than my exes (some of them anyway; her two most recent ones)

Don't blame me:

3. Toying with them older guys (he's younger than Calvin and Tom as is she however note that she's admitting to using them which seems like more of a reference to a bearding contract unless we're to believe she's admitting to being horrible to her exes)

Delicate:

4. never seen that color blue (his eyes are blue)

5. girls back home (they live in different counties)

So it goes:

6. wear you like a necklace (she has one with his initial on it. I’ve been told it’s a lesbian term as well but I didn’t add it to Karlie’s list as it’s not specific to her)

Gorgeous:

7. I got a boyfriend he's older than us -Sunset & vine (where his movie premiere was last October although we now know the song was written in September and interestingly enough the area is also well-known for it's gay bars)

King of my heart:

8. king of my heart (king is a male term and they have royalty in England)

9. Say you fancy me not fancy stuff (fancy is British slang for liking someone)

10. salute to me I'm your American queen (she’s American and he’s from the UK where they still have royalty)

Dress:

11. flashback when you met me your buzz cut, my hair bleached (if it's in fact true that they met at the Met Gala in 2016 that they both attended then that's a reference to the hairstyles they both had at the time though tbh the timeline doesn't really make sense for that to be true)

Call it what you want:

12. My baby's fit like a daydream (Fit is British slang for attractive and he's also physically fit)

13. Call it what you want (in reference to weather or not the relationship is real)

14. I want to wear his initial on a chain around my neck (because she wears a necklace with a J on it)

So there you go. I'm not saying you have to believe the album is about Karlie or not about Joe but there do appear to be a LOT more references to her so I'll just leave it up to you to decide what you want to believe, I just thought I'd post this to prove that there is in fact evidence to support Kaylor, it's not just a baseless conspiracy theory.