#and absolutely no semblance of a routine whatsoever and no ability to have a routine of any kind until they finish fitting the new bathroom

[thethingything]

anyway as always I'm just overwhelmed by a bunch of stuff at once and I'll be fine but wow it fucking sucks in the meantime and I'd like to maybe just get some time to rest and recuperate but what we're probably gonna get instead is either some unforseen bullshit to deal with, or just like 2 weeks of desperately sorting out the stuff we meant to do but couldn't keep up with before immediately being hit with the anniversary of some trauma that we didn't really cope with so much as repress as much as humanly possible so we could still function

[saltwukong]

Jaune and why he’s a disaster from the beginning--Volume 1

Jaune is an audience surrogate. He is intended to be the audience’s focal point for learning about new things in the RWBY universe, since he is obviously inexperienced and needs to be taught things.

Which means that right out of the bag, we’re tripping up. The setting for the first three seasons is Beacon, a very prestigious school that takes graduates from the more populated training schools (like Signal) and turns them into fully-fledged Huntsman. Jaune being inexperienced is an understatement. It would be one thing if Jaune were at a training school, where no matter how crappy he is, he can still have reasonably gotten in and still need more help than most. No, Jaune is in fact four years behind, on top of being mediocre at best. 

This, naturally, creates a problem down the line with faking his transcripts--I’ll get the actual crime and punishment aspect later, but for now I’ll hang on Aura.

This is the first real part where Jaune gets to fill out his “learning with the audience role”. If I were in charge here, I wouldn’t have had Jaune needing to be taught the basics of Aura, a skill that is flat-out essential in order to not be mince-meat and makes up the largest chunk of difference after skill level.

What I’d have done is have Jaune’s Aura--which is said to be unusually plentiful--and have it be his saving grace. Yeah, he might absolutely suck as a fighter and have a record of C’s, D’s and F’s on his Signal transcript--but he could still sway his entrance examiners by truthfully saying “I once got smashed by a Beringel through two buildings and got back up.” Since Jaune would be battling Grimm for a living, his Aura would conceivably be the tool that allows him to turn fights into battles of attrition until he wins by lasting longer.

That also provides a fine explanation for why the audience can hear about it. Remember when they get launched into the forest? Don’t have super-spear-Pyrrha save him. Let Jaune “Biggest Tank You Ever Saw” plow straight into the fucking ground and survive. Pyrrha finds him, walks up and comments that he’s hurt and asks why he’d blow such a huge chunk of his aura by neglecting a landing strategy before he even fought anything. 

Boom. The audience has just been presented with a new, important term and now gets to hear the characters chat about it without it being too noticeably expository.

Jaune: “Aura”?

Pyrrha: ...Your projection of your soul force? Your barrier against damage?

Jaune: Oh, is that what you guys call it? I’m from an old-fashioned family, we call it “spirit shield”. Aura does seem like a cooler name, though. [a cut on Jaune’s cheek heals].

Pyrrha, who Jaune now knows is a Big Fucking Deal: I have to say I’m impressed. Not many fighters would be so gung-ho. You must be pretty good!

Jaune, sweating: U-Uhh, right. But uh, like you said, I kind of blew a lot of it, so--why don’t you take point while I recharge?

Pyrrha, walking off: Sure.

Pyrrha, over her shoulder: If I might make a recommendation though, try channeling your aura through your shield for a future landing strategy. That’s what I did, and yours looks pretty tough.

There we go. The audience has just learned about aura--that it’s a projection of the soul, that it has a limited supply, that it can heal wounds, that it can be channeled through weapons and tools, and that while Jaune might have some capability, he’s misusing his and may not be as skilled as should be expected. In a conversation that takes 30 seconds.

That aside, while people do routinely fall back on “Jaune isn’t a main character, he shouldn’t be treated like one”, they do have something of a point. In most cases, the audience surrogate is also the central character, so time spent on them isn’t detrimental. But this is where Jaune starts to lose points as an audience surrogate as well, because the Jaunedice arc is where he starts making decisions we ourselves wouldn’t.

Barring the rather drab and annoying nature of an “overcoming the school bully” arc in a show we were led to believe was kind of serious, Jaune here stops learning about things while losing our patience with his decisions. We see right off the bat with his duels with Cardin that while Jaune might be able to do okay against Grimm, which do little to no thinking and which he can tank, that strategy works poorly on human huntsmen and gets him easily defeated. Yet, when the matter comes up between him and Pyrrha, not only do we learn he has no fucking combat experience or training whatsoever, but he somehow faked transcripts to get into the super-prestigious school, which requires an entrance exam to provide displays of actual combat.

Most of us in the RWBY fandom can be safely said to be at least teenagers in high school if not older, and most of us, having the matter of being accepted into collages drilled into our head and being good enough to get into them made into our biggest priority, would not have appreciated this. Jaune has admitted to seriously illicit activity and potentially could have legal trouble coming his way if this ever got out. At worst, he’d be unceremoniously killed when his lack of ability caught up to him, or he’d get a team member killed because they were unable to rely on him to make up a decent 1/4th of their team. At best, he’d be found out and shamed into leaving in total disgrace and barred from ever being trained at any official academy again. It flies in the face of not only our expectations as the audience, but the things we already know from those around her--we are supposed to admire Ruby for getting in two years ahead legitimately on her prodigious skill with a scythe and being considered on par with those who have more experience, so the revelation that Jaune cheated his way in seems almost tailor-made to make us lose respect for him.

What does Pyrrha do when faced with this dilemma? Why, she offers to train him! It’s a sweet deal very graciously given--Jaune’s future isn’t looking good right now and if he doesn’t get help, he’ll go down the drain fast. He’d ordinarily be a hopeless case, but his teacher would be Pyrrha Nikos, renowned huntress-in-training who’s won multiple tournaments and makes fighting look like art. It’s a great opportunity.

What does Jaune do when presented this offer?

He essentially snaps at her to fuck off. See, he needs to do this himself.

Another audience sympathy point lost on our audience surrogate. He makes pretty much the opposite of the right decision and the dumbest one possible. He has been caught red-handed with being a loser who has zero chance of keeping up, yet insists on doing so anyway even when granted the chance for help. For no reason. 

Jaune stops being the audience surrogate entirely throughout the Forever Fall Forest segment, where the only new thing we learn (Semblances, also a pretty big deal), is delivered by Pyrrha without him hearing it. Sure, he gets his victory over the Ursa Major, but saving Cardin just made Cardin look incompetent, something he shouldn’t be if he can defeat Jaune so easily. Moreover, how this ensures his secret about the transcripts stays silent is a mystery. Jaune is still shaming the huntsmen-in-training around him and it was technically Pyrrha that saved Cardin (by saving Jaune).

Jaune has so far not only failed to be punished for cheating his way in, Cardin is now keeping that secret and Pyrrha accepts him coming back and asking for teaching. Thus begins the start of Jaune being rewarded for terrible behavior.

[raidingyourheart]

Companions react to sole wanting to jump off trinity tower in power armor?

Companions react to the Sole Survivor wanting to make the jump from Trinity Tower in power armor.

◖   Ears prickling every time the wind dipped through the dilapidated architecture of one of the Commonwealth’s most imposing structures, Dogmeat almost shook. With each cautious step he made across the uneven flooring, his nails went ‘click’, ‘click’, ‘click’. He never passed within five feet of the edge, unable to stand beside the survivor, who so confidently peered over at the expanse of broken city. Their suit hissed as one foot bravely hung out over nothing. It returned shortly, heel grinding back into a fairly solid foundation, lest the building finally decide to give in to its aches and creaking.

     A steady whine left the dog, head tilting insistently to one side. He’d like to follow this human everywhere, but off the side of the tower was somewhere he could not go.

◖   ❝It’ll make headlines,❞ the joke was in good nature, but did nothing to stop Piper’s nervous habit. Her fingers curled and released in repetition, fingernails pressing tightly to her palm to the point of discomfort before dropping. ❝’Vault Dweller dares gravity!’ Gravity accepts, and… Well, wins.❞

    ❝Come on, Blue. We both know you’re not serious. You can’t be serious.❞

◖   The shutters on Codsworth’s optic lenses retracted, giving him the equivalent of a human’s wide-eyed expression. An indignant ❝You’re doing what?❞ left the Mr. Handy, chassis spinning to fully face the power armor clad daredevil.

     ❝While my programming insists I remain encouraging and as optimistic as possible, I dare say you’ve gone mad! And that’s coming from a place of concern,❞ one metal arm extended, the one with the claw attached, and the pincers opened and closed as though the robot was beckoning the other away from the ledge. ❝You put quite a bit of trust in that suit, but now I almost regret even uttering the word ‘unstoppable’. Smashing into the concrete below is a bit of a hard stop, don’t you agree?❞

◖   A nervous chuckle left his mouth, which two seconds prior, had been pressed in a firm purse. Preston shook his head, hand pulling on the collar of his duster. ❝Be careful,❞ were the only words he could manage, eyes trained intently on the proximity of the General to the side of the tower. Another step on their part elicited a following ❝Wait.❞

     ❝The roof of the Museum back in Concord and here are, well, very different. I won’t say that’s not the quickest way down, but we’re not in a rush, right? The Commonwealth can wait on us taking the safer route to the ground. No need to damage your power armor… or yourself.❞

◖   ❝Oh, sure! Why not?❞ Cait snapped, sarcasm bladed. ❝Those tin cans look mighty fun when you’re chargin’ into a fight, guns ablazin’, but the appeal is lost in this. S’not like you haven’t already jumped off every other building in this damned city… But those are lackin’ a few stories. Makes a difference, yeah?❞

     Her hip cocked to the side, hand finding its place atop it so she could send an uninterested glance at the person who currently held her contract. ❝If you’re tryin’ to impress me, it ain’t going to work. Now, if you want’a go bash a few heads together, that’s somethin’ I can get behind.❞

◖   ❝Was getting up here not enough of a thrill for you? It almost wore this old bot out,❞ Nick commented idly, unsure if his case partner was serious. He had a knack for reading expressions, but with the stoic, and slightly glaring, helmet of the power armor being the only thing to greet him in conversation, he was left turning to body language. There was no hesitation in the approach to the ledge, which made his teeth grit anxiously, something he was sure was a habit of the past Nick’s. He felt his good hand twitch, wanting for a cigarette to hold.

     ❝You sure? I know I can stamp the fun with my worrying sometimes, but here and there I’ve scrounged up some sound advice, like that breaking your fall with pavement isn’t the smartest move. You’re better off being a good liar than ending up with some shattered bones and a busted up suit if things go south.❞

◖   Maccready always had a routine when finding himself in a high place. His eyes would sweep the area, lock onto any covered spots with a good lookout, and store them in the back of his mind in case he needed to drop into a position to shoot. It had him so caught up that he barely heard the muffled voice of his employer suggest the stunt.

     The sharpshooter squinted, two fingers pinching the brim of his hat and pulling it off so his free hand could run through his hair, pulling strands out of his face. ❝You’re not paying me enough to do it with you, you know that, right?❞ A few seconds of silence went by before he started up again, jaw dropping open and closing as he tried to find some argument other than ‘this is stupid’.

     ❝Running with you has been one of the best gigs I’ve had in a while. Can we not risk it coming to an end like this? There’s enough people shooting at us as is.❞

◖   Deacon whistled lowly at the prospect, whether from being wowed by the bravo or taken aback by the cockiness. ❝You know,❞ he began, gesturing with his hand to the open space around them, ❝this one time…❞

     He had their attention, their shoulder turning to him slightly, head tilted in inclination that they were listening. ❝I made this exact jump,❞ the Railroad agent paused, trying to draw out the suspense as far as he could, ❝with no armor whatsoever.❞

     There was a heavy pause and then a stifled ❝Bullshit,❞ from Charmer, who didn’t even dignify him with a ‘you’re lying’ this time.

     ❝No! Honest,❞ he insisted, familiar smirk plastered on his face, as laughter threatened to interrupt him. ❝You can’t top my performance so why even try, right?❞

◖   It wasn’t the funniest joke, but it got a fair snort out of him. That was, until it wasn’t a joke. If the cruel ways of radiation hadn’t taken away any semblance of eyebrows, then they would have been bunched up, surveying the scene before him. ❝Alright, alright,❞ Hancock started, hands up almost in surrender, ❝I got’cha now.❞

     ❝But hear me out,❞ he proposed, mouth tugged into a grin. ❝Come out of that. Take a huff of this,❞ the ghoul’s hand disappeared within his jacket, momentarily digging in one of the inner pockets for a Jet canister, half-empty, or rather, half-full ( he did like to be optimistic from time to time ). ❝Then, stand near the edge, I’ll shimmy up behind you, hold under your arms, and you say something like… ‘I’m flying, John, I’m flying!’. That’s some pre-war stuff, ain’t it? I promise it’ll be a hell of a lot better than falling.❞

◖   ❝Careless and improper use of a Brotherhood issued suit is grounds for suspension, soldier,❞ Danse tread a fair distance behind the survivor, unsure of the building’s ability to withstand their combined weight in one spot, occasionally calling out for them to keep alert and safe. ❝If any of the initiates told you of some challenge involving this, I regret to inform you that bragging rights, or even the caps if this is a bet, isn’t worth the trip to see the Proctor and explain to her why you’ve damaged your armor.❞

     He exhaled sharply through his nose when offered the chance to jump off with the vault dweller, in which he replied with furrowed eyebrows and a firm shake of his head. ❝Absolutely not! Next you’ll be wanting to take on the Prydwen deck–❞

     ❝No.❞

◖   Curie was delighted by the vantage point of the skyline, hands clasped together. ❝Is this what they would call a picture-perfect view?❞ she turned, smile wavering slightly as she watched the power armor helmet tilt downwards, the person within it clearly considering the distance down. ❝We are very high up, yes?❞ her tone had taken on a warning, mind racing with images of scattered pieces of metal dashed against the city streets, and a crumpled body laying motionless amidst them. Had some color left her face? She certainly felt colder, and not from the draftiness of their location.

     ❝You must be careful with heights. This would be quite the fall, and while I do have advanced medical capabilities, I’m afraid that… that I would be rendered useless in aiding you. Perhaps you would like to enjoy the sunrise with me instead?❞

◖   ❝I’d highly advise against it.❞ That had easily been the fourth time the phrase had been said. X6-88 stood behind his charge, arms defaulting to folding behind his back. ❝We’re already exposed up here as easy targets, so it is my suggestion that we move back down.❞

     ❝While I am just as eager as you to see the suspension capabilities of your armor, the recklessness of this impromptu testing is both unwise and impulsive. Can we not both agree that it’s more trouble than it’s worth?❞

◖   ❝You’re the Overboss,❞ the reply was almost robotic at this point, more of an excuse to justify to himself why they chose to do the things they did than to reassure them that they could. Gage grimaced, ❝But ya know, I wouldn’t necessarily say ‘go for it’.❞

     ❝Ain’t no one here to impress. Maybe jumpin’ off Fizztop would get you some credit from the Pack, but–❞ he paused, giving one shoulder a shrug, ❝is that really what you’re aiming for, boss? I’m s’posed to be watching your back out here, and if I head home saying that you died doing this, then they’ll, I don’t know, think I pushed you or somethin’. Consider this me looking our for your neck and mine.❞

[miss-musings]

Why I want to stop watching the Blacklist (a.k.a., A Rant by Me)

This used to be my favorite show. Hands down. I would legitimately schedule things around it; I would leave events early to make sure I could watch it live; I would post about it on Tumblr and read other people’s posts the rest of the evening; I would search through multiple review site’s posts the next day.

I loved the dynamic between Red and Liz. I loved the mysteries and the little morsels of answers that we would get. I loved how, in the S1 finale, it felt like no one was safe: Meera got killed; Harold got attacked and nearly killed; Tom was shot and left for dead.

But, over the past few seasons, this show has become the bane of my TV-watching experience.

(EDIT: this post, which quietly keeps gaining notes, was written post-S4, pre-S5. So, there’s still plenty of relevant things in the post, but just keep the timing in mind.)

I would watch it, sure. But that was because I didn’t want the folks on Tumblr spoiling it for me. It was because I thought we were finally getting answers – which is what they teased us with every other week – only to feel so disappointed.

This last year, I made reaction videos for a friend of mine for every single episode. You know what one of the most commonly said things in those videos is? “Well, at least next week’s preview looks good.” Only to be disappointed in that episode, and to say the same thing about next week’s preview, and the cycle repeated itself until we actually got a half-way decent episode (which was usually some kind of finale or premiere, because that’s the only time actual shit can happen – during Sweeps Week).

Over and over again, both online and in person, I compared this to those scenes in cartoons where someone puts a carrot on a fishing pole in front of a donkey, and the donkey runs so hard to reach the carrot, only to never get there.

That’s how this show has felt the past season or two.

It’s only a shadow of what it once was, and I’m tired of it. I wish I could stop watching it.

So many other people I follow on Tumblr have said they’ve either stopped or thought about stopping. By comparison, Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad and the Walking Dead seemingly increase their viewership every season; the Blacklist has been NBC’s lowest-rated show in the demo for the last year, IIRC. The ratings for the Redemption spin-off were so low, the showrunners tried to pass it off as a one-off miniseries, when it was ALWAYS intended to be its own full-length show.

I understand that the show does well in DVR viewership numbers, and it was the most expensive TV show that Netflix had purchased when Season 1 was released.

But, this show continues to disappoint me. There’s hardly anything I like about it anymore. Hell, even James Spader, who’s a master at his craft, seems to be bored with it. His monologues are becoming more and more cliche, and even his amazing performances can’t save this dumpster-fire.

Its protagonist, Liz, is all over the fucking place in terms of characterization. First, she was naive and learned her “husband” had used and abused her. Then, she went to the dark side, chained him up on a boat and said she’d never forgive him for what he’d done. Then, she apparently forgave him, slept with him, had his kid, tried to remarry the guy, and then faked her death to get away with him and is now living her happy dream life with her little girl and her ‘perfect’ husband.

What happened to the dark, morally questionable, grungy Liz? What happened to the Liz who was jaded and afraid after being on the run for several weeks, or months?

She just settled down with a guy who she used to hate and she’s living the dream.

What in the literal fuck?

And, for all the time that has been invested in Liz, she has made little to no progress in her characterization these past few seasons. In fact, she’s done more of a 360. She’s right back where she started, more or less.

Why should the audience give a shit about her journey if she’s not making any progress? Why should we care that, halfway through this show, she has everything she’s ever wanted?

The side characters, like Aram, Samar, Ressler, Cooper and others are there just to serve the plot. Any time there’s a semblance of some character development or plot progression, the showrunners regress everyone back to Stage One so we can do it all over again. Aram and Samar look like they’re making progress in their possible romantic relationship? Fuck that, we’ve got to make sure Aram runs back to his abusive girlfriend and string this thing along another season! Remember when Ressler got shot, had prescription drug problems, and was in Narcotics Anonymous? Yeah, me neither.

Mr. Kaplan, who was best when she was on-screen to sass and help Reddington once every few episodes, gets pushed into the spotlight for some made-up bullshit reason that had never been discussed or hinted at previous to the “Mr. Kaplan used to work for Katarina Rostova” storyline. And while Susan Bloomaert is a fantastic and underrated actress and did her absolute best to make those scenes between her and Liz feel emotional, I didn’t really care about their dynamic at all because it felt so forced, underdeveloped, and out-of-nowhere.

Whereas the relationship that I care the MOST about – that between Red and Liz – that has been the most built-up and developed over the course of the show keeps getting thrown under the bus as Liz does the whole “love Red, hate Red, forgive Red” song-and-dance routine. She claims she agrees with Red when he tells her not to go back to Tom in Season 2… only to go back to Tom later in Season 2. She’s totally down with asking Red to help her whenever she’s a criminal on the run… but the minute her wedding gets shot up, she yells at him and says it’s his fault.

And now, as far as the Lizzington fans go, which I count myself as one of them, the show has written itself into a corner. Because all the amazing chemistry and romantic tropes throughout the show feel incredibly creepy now that Liz believes Red is her dad, regardless of whether he actually is or not. I don’t care how they try to pull themselves out of the ginormous hole they’ve dug for themselves on that one – why the hell would a woman ever end up with a guy that she once thought was her dad, even if it turned out he actually wasn’t?

And the only real way out of it is the Impostor Theory – a well-written and well-researched theory, but one that makes people have to do fucking mental gymnastics for it to work. You have to assume a lot of people like Naomi and Reddington’s former roommate from the Naval Academy who’s now an admiral, are in on it. Whereas dudes like Finch or the Director aren’t…

Don’t get me wrong; I think it’s a wonderful theory and it explains a lot. But, if it ends up being true, it means one of two things:

1) The writers didn’t plan this from the beginning and lucked their way into it

OR

2) The writers DID plan this from the beginning, which means they have the ability to be really good writers, but then they fell into all this other bullshit – like Liz’s weird arc and other things – which really means that they’re not that good of writers; they just had the one good idea.

And if the Impostor Theory DOESN’T end up being true, in some form or fashion, that means that Red really IS Liz’s dad, and this whole fucking show – Red’s entire characterization, his relationship and dynamic with her – has been a lie. Canon can be throw out the window to rot in the sewer and fuck itself in the interim, because the writers don’t even care any more.

Which, I realize is unfair, because I know there are hundreds of people who work really hard to make this show happen, and while it’s not, like, the worst show of all time, the fact that it had such potential and has fallen so far, almost makes it seem worse than a show that was so bad from the beginning I never invested time in it.

And what makes it even WORSE is that the showrunners continue to act like this is the most groundbreaking show on television, and put it on a pedestal On High, along with the likes of Game of Thrones, The Americans, and The Sopranos… you know, actually good shows.

That would be the equivalent of the Taken director demanding that his movie should’ve gotten an Oscar. It’s like, you know it was a fine movie, and I had a good time watching it, but like, bring yourself back down to earth. Taken is okay, but it is NOT Oscar-worthy material, so get off your high horse, dude.

I guess, if nothing else, it shows that the showrunners, writers and actors are so talented that they got me to invest in the show to the point where I can’t not watch it, even though it’s fallen so far and I feel like it’s nowhere near as good as it used to be. They hooked me and got me to care about these characters and their dynamics so much that, even though it frustrates me week in and week out, I will still keep watching it.

It’s just that, now, I might be doing it with a bottle of vodka, taking shots every time:

Red has a monologue that proves James Spader is too damn good for this show;

Liz is bitchy to Red for little to no reason, while continuing to be lovey-dovey with Tom;

Ressler survives a fight or car accident or some other action sequence with no injuries whatsoever;

Harry Lennix is completely underused as Harold Cooper in an episode, because he only tells his employees to do the obvious… and literally nothing else;

Samar and/or Aram take a step back from getting together, despite hints that they’ve liked each other since Season 2.

So, bottoms up, Blacklist fans!