#and both have been highly evaluated.'

[ikusayu-no-hana]

but actually it fits so well . chougi (probably) being an ootachi before kunihiro shortened him and left his inscription on him . the closest thing him having to relatives being the distant osafune and (ill-fortunedly) his equally celebrated replica , while manba, despite allllll his hesitations is adored by his brothers . chougi having nooothing else save his name bc even the myth of the yamanba was attributed to both of them and being the latter to manifest obviously making him a footnote to manba . and then him masking his identity during the investigation...

[ms-demeanor]

any thoughts on the new post that staff went scorched earth on which is now making the rounds abt tumblr live? it basically screenshots all the tos and claims if you've ever opened the app (or in some rbs, unsnoozed live) tumblr has gotten your data. on the one hand i feel like this is fearmongering, but on the other its true that MOST sites have your data as is so its pretty standard. you seem pretty knowledgeable abt data gathering so i was wondering abt your take

This is going to be pretty unkind but watching tumblr users interact with staff and live is a great primer on how conspiracy theories happen.

Nobody on this fucking website knows how to read a ToS, nobody on this website knows how anything fucking works (sorry, this is not a dig at you but how would tumblr "get" your data from you clicking or unclicking live; the only data that tumblr has on you is the data that you have put on tumblr what data do people think that clicking the "new" button is scooping up that is anything beyond interactions or posts or IP addresses which are the things that tumblr already has information about like you do not introduce new information into the tumblr ecosystem by clicking a button you haven't installed anything you haven't changed permissions on your browser if everyone is so goddamned scared about live stealing their data i strongly recommend they stop using anything but public internet through an anonymizer and making sure location data is shut off on all of their devices and anyone who is flipping their shit about the type of data that live is collecting but who is using chrome on any device needs to chill the fuck out about live and flip the fuck out about google)

this is like that post about twitter's content policy that circulated the other day or that post about deviantart's content policy that circulated ten fucking years ago nobody knows how to read legal documents and nobody knows how to read technical documentation and this comes together into unholy matrimony on the no reading comprehension at all moral panic website

live never violated the GDPR it was just rolled out in the US first but the entire userbase decided that because it hadn't been rolled out simultaneously in the EU and the US that it was SO UNSPEAKABLY PRIVACY VIOLATEY THAT THE EU HAD BANNED IT FOR ITS CRIMES with, like, nothing whatsoever backing that up because, again, even at its most intrusive Live collects about as much data as Twitter or Yelp, both of which are *capable* of meeting GDPR standards with that level of data collection (even if musk sometimes makes decisions that violate GDPR).

Live is significantly less intrusive than any facebook product, than Amazon, and than any Google product. If you use youtube logged in, don't worry about live, the horse is out of the barn and tumblr is the least of your worries *regardless* of live. If you regularly use Google as a search engine please god learn how to evaluate and compare risks across platforms because Live is like a coughing baby compared to about a dozen things that most highly online people interact with every single day.

If you don't want to use live don't use live. Clicking the button doesn't magically transfer your secret FBI file to tumblr and even agreeing to the ToS doesn't share anything that tumblr doesn't already have if you don't continue to interact - if you don't interact with live after agreeing to the ToS it's not collecting any data except your non-interaction.

For everyone who is losing it over Live just turn off your goddamned location on your fucking cellphone and turn off your location on your goddamned computers and that's it, you're good, you're fine, relax. If your response to "turn off your location" is "but I need it for _____" then don't worry about Live, whatever "_____" is was already collecting and selling your data.

Do you use an activity tracker? Congrats, you have much, much bigger privacy issues to worry about than tumblr live.

Okay but also I yelled about that post and the very many ways in which it was incorrect in January.

And I happened to take an archive of the page at that time because I'm a paranoid motherfucker.

And if you want my guess as to why staff went "scorched earth" on that post it's probably because if you scroll down to the bottom of the page on the archive, OP calls on everyone looking at the post to send a kind fuck you to the CEO then tagged his tumblr.

If you look at the other posts that went scorched earth in relation to tumblr staff they were also posts that very pointedly directed a lot of ire at a single staff member.

I don't think that any individual tumblr staff members are above criticism and I don't think that staff as a whole is above criticism but part of learning to read a ToS is understanding that someone can be shitty and vague and use TERF talking points and skirt the line and be technically okay under the ToS while someone can have a legitimate gripe about another user being horrible and manage to violate the ToS by accidentally spinning up a harassment campaign or suicide baiting someone.

Shitty people like nazis and terfs thrive on being edge cases. They are very good at finding a boundary and standing juuuuuuuuust on this side of it and going "la la la I'm not violating the ToS, you can't stop me!" and that blows and it leads to a lot of people encountering a lot of shitty stuff on a lot of websites but personally I'm pretty glad that there's a lot of gray area because when you cut out gray area that's when you see things like It's Going Down getting banned as extremist content alongside white supremacists. Please continue to report nazis and terfs, and when possible go deep into their pages to report because a pattern of behavior is more likely to get recognized as hate speech than a single post that gets reported a hundred times. Please block as many people who it's harmful for you to interact with as possible because it's clear that staff is not going to do the kind of work protecting users that users would like staff to do.

However I just can't get angry on behalf of a blogger who got nuked for saying "Hey everyone who hates this feature that we all hate please go tell the CEO to fuck himself at this URL specifically" - that is an extremely clear violation of the ToS because it is absolutely targeted harassment.

So now tumblr-the-userbase is going off on its merry conspiracy way skipping through fields and lacking reading comprehension and saying "users are getting banned for reporting the crimes of tumblr live and its gdpr violations" and ignoring the fact that the post was nuked because the last line was saying "hey everyone, let's all individually tell the CEO to fuck off in messages sent directly to him that are certainly not going to include any threats, exaggerations, gore, etc. etc. etc."

If I were to make a post that had 50k notes and the last line was "and while you're at it, please send tumblr-user-ms-demeanor a personalized message telling them why they're a terrible person so they know what we think of them" it would absolutely be reasonable to say that was harassing that user. And that post did it with the CEO. Who is not above criticism (and I have my criticisms! I don't think he really gets tumblr and that's a problem!), but jesus fucking christ don't tag the goddamned CEO or any other staff member in a call to action asking users to send them messages saying "fuck off" this is literally the stupidest thing I've ever seen a tumblr conspiracy theory coalesce around.

Anyway thank you for giving me a place to vent i've been getting more and more pissed about this for three days. Everyone feel free to kindly tell tumblr user ms demeanor to fuck off.

[mydearzero]

𝐑𝐄𝐃 | 𝐄𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

MASTERLIST

18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Summary: What once was an innocent crush on a coworker quickly turned into a full blown infatuation with your boss. She could reprimand you all she wanted, but did she have to wear red while doing so?

Contents: NO Y/N, fem!Reader, BAU!reader, unit chief!Emily, SMUT, coworkers, very slight dom/sub undertones, office sex, oral sex, grinding, fingering, power imbalance (boss), canon compliant violence, If I missed any warnings please tell me!

2.8K words

it's here folks, enjoy. let's just ignore that everything about emily screams woman lover to build tension okay. this was the quickest 2.8K I've written in a long time so uh yeah do with that info what you will (I'm horny for Emily) - nik

You hadn't had the opportunity to work with Emily Prentiss before she left the team to work for Interpol. You'd only just missed each other, you joining mere weeks after she'd left. 

Her reputation preceded her. The team was overly fond of her, even after having faked her own death. You'd seen a picture here or there, but nothing could live up to the Emily Prentiss who met you in New York for the Copycat Killer case. 

She'd been in a relationship with some guy Mark, so you'd really tried to look the other way. But when Hotch went on temporary leave during the whole Scratch situation, she volunteered to rejoin. The day she stepped foot in the bullpen, you knew you were in trouble. 

You could ignore the heat rushing to your face and your hands getting clammy. You could ignore the knowing glances JJ gave you. You could even ignore the digs Luke sent your way once he'd figured out something was going on. What you couldn't ignore, however, was the story Emily was telling while having had one too many drinks. 

"-and my girlfriend at the time freaked out. I tried to tell her it was a fake, but she was already halfway to crying in my arms." 

The words repeated over and over again in your head. 

Girlfriend. 

Her. 

She. 

You could handle an unattainable crush. Hell. Who hadn't had a crush on a straight girl at least once in their life? But knowing Emily played for both teams changed things. It made your irrational feelings rational. You completely lost the ability to look her in the eyes after that. 

You tried to not let your feelings get in the way of your job. The work the BAU did was too important to let that happen. 

It didn't last long. 

An adrenaline rush got the better of you while attempting to talk down an UnSub. But what were you supposed to do? He'd held a gun to Emily's head. One wrong move and it would've been over. You couldn't take that chance. 

Your ears were ringing as tunnel vision took over. The grimy scenery of the warehouse faded into the background. The dripping of the leaking pipes was deafened by your heartbeat. The UnSub's words were drowned out by Emily's haggard breathing. She was scared. 

You did what you had to. You took the shot. The man had dropped to the floor, but not before firing a storm of bullets in your direction, only missing by a few inches. 

While you'd been lucky nobody had been hurt, the same couldn't be said about the team's reactions to your actions. The flight back to Quantico had been short but tense. You wouldn't be hearing the end of this for quite some time to come. 

Though you knew the team would be on edge around you for some time, you hadn't expected what would happen on the very next case. 

"You're off the case." Emily's words were blunt. 

"What? Why?" You questioned. You'd expected to have to take a psych evaluation. Maybe even redo your gun qualifications. But to be put on the bench? Especially on a local case? 

"We've profiled this UnSub as highly unpredictable. I can't have you take uncalculated risks in the field. I appreciate all the work you've done so far, but this is where I need you to step back." Emily looked apologetic. 

"The last case was different! I can stay back here with Penelope. Just let me help, Emily, please," you pleaded. Damn your inability to be mad at her. You couldn't, not when she wore that damn red top that complimented her complexion (and boobs) so well. 

"I'm sorry. We'll talk when we get back." 

Penelope wouldn't let you into her office, so you resorted to catching up on paperwork at your desk. You could've left and taken this as a sign to get some free time. Yet you stayed right there, waiting. 

When Penelope finally left her office with her stuff, ready to go home, you knew the case was over. She asked you to late dinner, but you declined, waiting for the rest of the team to arrive. She waved a short goodbye before stepping into the elevator, leaving you alone with your thoughts once more. 

It wasn't long before the elevator moved again, doors opening to reveal Emily Prentiss. Just Emily Prentiss. You frowned as she walked into the bullpen, nodding at her office, signalling you to follow her. 

"Where's the rest?" You wondered, walking through the door and taking a seat across from the desk. Emily shut the door and turned to close the shutters. 

"I sent them home. We'll debrief in the morning," was all she said. 

She gestured to the chair across from hers. You sat, unsure of what to expect next. 

"I think we need to talk about what happened in New York," Emily left it an open statement. She obviously expected you to do the talking. 

"I'm aware my actions didn't look thought through. And maybe they weren't. But I was worried about what he would do to you," you were honest about what had gone down. 

"Worried or not, there are protocols we need to follow. You put everybody in that room in danger by making that choice. How is that any better than having me potentially get shot?" 

You really tried to focus. It was a serious and consequential discussion. But it was at that moment you realized you'd never actually been alone with Emily. You rubbed your hands on your thighs, trying to rid them of their clammyness and the tension that built in your body. 

"I don't know," was your final reply. A weak one, at that. Emily searched your face for answers. She noted the sheen covering your skin and dilated pupils. You felt scrutinized under her gaze. She squinted, slowly leaning back and crossing her arms. 

You hadn't meant to look, but the action brought the red top back to your attention. Your eyes dropped to Emily's cleavage, if only for a second. Your mouth went dry as they quickly snapped back up to meet her now amused ones. A coy smile crept onto her face. Emily took a deep breath before speaking again. This time, you knew better, only looking in your peripheral at how her chest raised and fell. 

"You know, earlier, you mentioned the last case was different. How come?" Emily inquired. She'd caught that, huh? You felt trapped as you figured she'd deduced the real reason for your careless actions.  

You didn't speak as Emily rose from her chair, taking slow strides around the desk. She placed a hand on your shoulder, standing behind you and leaning over the other. Goosebumps raised on your arms as you felt her warm breath against your collar. 

"I think I know," she whispered in your ear. You unconsciously craned your neck, allowing her more access. Your heart beat rapidly. The hand on your shoulder slowly trailed down your arm, rubbing up and down. 

"Would you have taken the shot if it had been JJ? Or Spencer? Or maybe you would've taken it if it were Garcia. You're such great friends, after all," Emily's tone was taunting. The rising temperature of the room was quickly becoming unbearable. 

Her free hand reached for your chin, turning your head to face her. She cupped your cheek gently, admiring the sight of your desperation. She'd barely even touched you. Barely implied anything. 

"Is this what your strange behaviour lately has been about?" Emily asked. You bit your lip, not saying a word. She clicked her tongue, getting annoyed at your lack of response.  

"Is this not what you want?" She walked around the chair, standing in front of you. You couldn't give in. You wouldn't be able to stop. Not if she gave you a taste. Your hands remained firmly planted by your side as Emily did the unthinkable. She put her hands on your shoulders and draped her legs over yours, straddling you. Your eyes closed at the sensation of having her so close. 

The weight of her ass on your thighs was delectable. Her hands trailed down your arms, stopping when they rested on yours. She leaned forward, and you had to suppress a groan at the feeling of her chest pushing against yours. She took your hands and brought them around herself, planting them firmly on her bottom. Your entire body was on fire. 

"Look at me," Emily's voice was sultry. You opened your eyes tentatively, immediately dropping them to her lips, which were now dangerously close to yours. She didn't hesitate, kissing you roughly. Her hands came up to cup your face. You finally gave in, properly holding her on your lap as she fervidly kissed you. 

You moved your mouth away from hers, kissing down her jaw and sucking harshly at the skin of her neck. A timid moan came from her lips. You'd never heard a more beautiful sound. Her fingers started unbuttoning your blouse as you continued your attack, creating blemishes that contrasted with her pale skin. Once she got the blouse off, Emily's hands fondled your breasts roughly. 

"Shit, Em..." You sighed. You leaned back against the chair, admiring Emily in all her glory. 

"You look so fucking good in red, you don't even know," you groaned, tugging at the bottom of her shirt. 

"I do know," Emily raised her arms, allowing you to pull the shirt over her head. "That's why I wear it." 

"You drive me crazy, Prentiss," you finally admitted. 

"I think I know the feeling," Emily moaned, taking your hand and crudely stuffing it down her pants. Luckily the waistband was elastic, allowing you to feel the dampness of her underwear as you manoeuvred your wrist to cup her pussy. 

"Fuck... You don't know how many times I've imagined feeling your pussy," you confessed. "I've dreamt of the things I'd do to you." 

Emily groaned as you pushed her panties to the side, feeling the wetness against your fingers. The positioning of your hand might've been awkward, but you didn't care. Emily opted to go for another kiss as you started rubbing her clit. 

The soft noises she made while her tongue was in your mouth were otherworldly. Her hips ground against your hand, desperate for more friction. 

Emily hooked her fingers into the cups of your bra, not bothering to unclasp it, simply tugging them down to free your tits. She left a trail of open-mouthed kisses down your neck and chest before taking a nipple between her teeth. 

"Fuck- Emily," you whine. She brought her hand up to your other breast, pinching and biting your nipples in tandem. You retaliated by finally circling your fingers over her entrance, pushing two inside. 

"Oh! Ah- Fuck," Emily exclaimed, throwing her head back. You curled your fingers in the way you did to yourself while thinking of her late at night. Emily reached behind her, placing her hands on the edge of the desk, creating more space for you to do what you had to. 

Emily was becoming less coherent with every pump of your fingers. Your thumb hit her clit harshly with every thrust inside her pussy. Just seeing her come undone like this, on your lap, by your hand, was enough for you to drench your own underwear.

You brought your unoccupied hand to her naked waist, admiring her figure. You couldn't believe you got to see her like this after all this time you spent pining. Her eyes were closed as her chest heaved with heavy breaths. 

"Fuck, don't stop," Emily moaned. Her jaw was slack. Her knuckles turned white as her grip on the desk tightened. You felt her walls constrict around your fingers. You curled them in a come hither motion as you circled her clit with your thumb. 

Emily's arms shook as her moans turned into high-pitched whines, signalling she was getting close. 

"Shit! Oh my god," She exclaimed, followed by a loud moan of your name. It was like music to your ears. 

She rode out her high as she gushed around your fingers. Your free hand drew soothing patterns on her hip, working her through her climax. 

You carefully withdrew your hand from her panties, bringing your fingers to your mouth and sucking them clean. Emily let herself fall back forward, no longer having the strength to hold up her upper body with her arms. 

She took your fingers from your mouth, wrapping her lips around them and sucking seductively. She released them and pushed herself off your lap, tugging you up from your seat. She switched your positions, pushing you against the desk before getting on her knees. 

Emily reached for the button on your pants, undoing it and tugging it down. She tapped your ankle, signalling you to step out of them and spread your legs. It was a bit awkward with your shoes still on, but you made it work. Her fingers left a trail of goosebumps in their wind as she traced them up your leg to your inner thigh. 

She followed the path she'd just drawn with her mouth, hooking her teeth in the waistband of your underwear, laughing as she tugged them down. You smiled at her antics. 

Her mouth returned between your legs, licking a hesitant stripe between your folds. The kitten licks to your clit drove you crazy. 

"Fuck, please, Em," you begged, bringing your hands to her hair. You couldn't feel more lewd, tits out in your boss's office, said boss between your legs eating you out. The scandal of it all only turned you on even more. 

"Can't believe you put your whole job on the line-," Emily scoffed between licks. "-just because you wanted some pussy." 

"Not just some pussy," you moaned as she sucked on your clit. "Yours." 

"Such a horny little thing for your unit chief," Emily mumbled. The vibrations of her words added to your pleasure. 

Your grip on her dark locks tightened as she fucked your entrance with her tongue expertly. You had to put all your weight against the desk to stop your knees from buckling.

"F-fuck, Em. Oh my god," you groaned as she added her fingers to the mix. 

You dared to look down, only to be met with the finest sight the world had to offer. Emily gazed up at you through her lashes, dark eyes blown wide and amused. You could see her free hand was between her legs, stroking herself at the same rhythm she had with her mouth on your cunt. 

God, did you wish you had Reid's memory right about now. 

You didn't know how much longer you could last. Having had the pleasure of feeling her around your fingers, witnessing her expression as she came. It was enough to have you teetering on the edge. 

"Ah, fuck. I'm close," you whimpered. Emily moaned loudly, her pace increasing. Your hips bucked against her mouth, chasing the pleasure. Her hands came up to your sides, holding you in place. 

You had to withhold from forcefully pushing her head closer, desperate for more pressure, more friction, more more more. 

You balled your fists, throwing your head back. The knot in your abdomen tightened, threatening to snap any second. 

"Oh- shit, please." 

"Come for me." It was like she'd pressed a magic button, your climax immediately upon you as she spoke the words. 

"Emily!" You came with a loud cry, grinding your hips against her mouth. It was mindblowing. You'd never come that hard. Emily helped you ride out your high, careful to not overstimulate you. 

She rose from her position on the floor, hands never leaving your body as she got back on eye level. You searched her face for regret as both of you stood there, taking in the situation and catching your breath. 

She leaned in, placing a tender kiss on your lips. You smiled, kissing her back passionately. She helped you redress your upper body, all while never breaking the kiss. 

You separated to pick up your respective discarded pieces of clothing. The atmosphere was light. There was no unresolved tension as you had expected. A mutual understanding had been created. 

Emily grabbed her stuff and walked with you down to the bullpen. "Dinner tomorrow, my place," she ordered.

"Yes, ma'am," you agreed, putting your things in your bag. 

"For now, go get your go bag out of your car," she instructed, locking the door to her office. 

"Why?" You asked as you walked with her to the elevator. 

"Because you can return the favour and have an early appetizer in my bed tonight." 

[tarotwithlove]

PAC ⋆ year of the dragon predictions!

choose your group, then scroll to the bottom and find a short word of advice for your sun, moon, or rising sign!

reminder that this is a general reading and messages found here may not apply to everyone. take what resonates, leave what doesn't, and don't force anything if it does not fit.

BOOK A READING WITH ME · BOOK A 2024 YEAR AHEAD READING WITH ME (GENERAL OR NSFW) · LINKTREE · 18+ PATREON · TIPS ♡ tips, bookings, and feedback are highly appreciated!

GROUP ONE

cards · six of cups, knight of wands, ace of cups, the world, the devil, knight of pentacles, spellcasting oracle: home, compassion, healing. 

channelled songs · habibi by tamino. lucidia (egodeath) by ambré. hate it or luv it by central cee. ea’alah (family) by spillage village. 

my dear group one ♡ this is a year of grounding and going within. you will be doing a lot of inner and shadow work this year, which will pay off immensely as this year goes on. in fact, the more you improve your connection with the divine -- the more you let go, and let god -- the more material success you will see. 

on the topic of material success, this is an incredibly prosperous year where your career is concerned. you are going to achieve many of your life goals this year. so think big; dream big. don’t limit yourself. there has been an incredible shift for you in the universe, and with this shift also comes the reminder that the only person standing between you and the life you dream of is you. 

this year, remember that whether you think you can or you think you cannot -- you are right. 

love this year may be more tricky, with you often having to choose between a relationship or your career pursuits. though for most of you, this is a self-imposed choice you make out of fear of commitment. 

know that you do not have to be afraid of love, my dear, and that you can be successful in your career even while in a relationship. look at victoria monet, who has finally broken into the mainstream and who has not had to sacrifice love or motherhood for it. you do not need to sacrifice it either. you can have a thriving personal life and a thriving professional life. you can have it all. 

they say that one year can change your life, and for you, my dear, this is that year. 

GROUP TWO

cards · the high priestess, two of swords, six of pentacles, nine of pentacles, knight of pentacles, justice, spellcasting oracle: truth, transformation, good luck. 

channelled songs · this time by tracy chapman. the bomb by florence + the machine. my number one by gang of instrumentals. brand new city by mitski. 

my dear group two ♡ this is a year of pause as you re-evaluate the course your life has taken and the course you want it to take from this moment forward. this may be a more slow moving year as you try to find your footing, and know that this is okay. some years are for rest, some years are for action. this is your year of rest and recuperation, of slowing down -- and getting help and aid  -- so that you can come back better than ever. don't fight it. in fact, you need to allow it to happen. 

your career may also slow down this year, and you may have to rely on donations or community help more than you had to in the past. some of you may be laid off this year, which pushes you to move back in with your family. this decision to move back in with family -- or share finances in some other way -- may also be a conscious one to give you to the ability to save more money and have more financial freedom in the future. 

you may feel impatient this year, as if you are falling behind, but know that no such thing is possible. you are following the path you should. all things are falling into place as they should.

in love, however, you may find that you are particularly blessed this year. you may find a partner who truly understands and uplifts you -- uplifts you both emotionally and financially, as they support you through this difficult patch. this person will love you flaws and all, and you will love them the same in turn. 

this relationship seems solid, and may result in an engagement and marriage even after knowing each other for a short time.

GROUP THREE

cards · the fool, seven of pentacles, queen of pentacles, the high priestess, six of cups, six of pentacles, spellcasting oracle: justice, friendship, prosperity.

channelled songs: ballroom extravaganza by dpr ian. party tricks by ayanna. to be honest by kai. pink + white by frank ocean. 

my dear group three ♡ this is your year of new beginnings and limitless, limitless potential. anything you set your mind to, you can achieve -- or, rather, the one or two big goals you have set your mind to and are working towards, you will achieve. as long as you are willing to put in the work that is required of you. and, my dear, i get the feeling that you are one hundred percent prepared to put in all the hard work that is required of you. thus, your success is all but guaranteed. breathe out and trust in that; trust in the process; trust in the divine, who is on your side. 

of course, this success also concerns what this year has in store for your career, with this being your most prosperous year yet. you are trusting yourself more this year, as well as trusting the divine, which leads you to keep holding your head up high and working hard even when you don't see the result you want -- yet. you are being more practical this year, saving more and spending less, trusting your gut, and putting yourself more and more out there. all of which will make you experience wealth and prosperity greater than you ever imagined. 

this year, in love, it is as if you are blessed by the divine itself. by aphrodite herself. love this year brings you something you had lost -- an innocence regarding romance from a time before heartbreak and the state of the dating pool jaded you. turned your heart to stone. 

you are giving and receiving in love this year, which may be something new to those of you who in the past were always the ones giving more. or who always found themselves on the unrequited side of a relationship. open your heart to love and know that you deserve this. 

GROUP FOUR

cards · eight of swords, the devil, the world, the moon, ten of wands, seven of swords, strength, spellcasting oracle: commitment, trust, friendship. 

channelled songs · bringin' on the heartbreak by mariah carey. lettera a mio padre by ermal meta. lagoons by kane strang. light by taemin.

my dear group four ♡ this year is one of fighting battles. you are fighting against your deepest fears and anxieties to complete a project or phase of your life. for some, this is a book or film that you have been working on for some time. for others, this is a stage of your academic journey. for all of you, whatever it is, you may have to fight against your limited beliefs constantly this year in order to get done everything that you need to get done. that little voice in the back of your head that tells you you’re not good enough may be louder than ever this year, but know that you are good enough. that what you’re creating is good enough.

these feelings also come into play in your career this year, with many things around your career being uncertain. especially if you are trying to break into a new field. you may be putting out application after application after application, without hearing anything back, which pushes you to be more innovative with the ways you earn money. or which pushes you to humble yourself and ask someone to set you up with a job while you try to get things sorted out in your professional life. 

as for love this year of the dragon, you may be speaking up and using your voice more and more. being the first to ask someone out or to reach out and break the ice, or telling your partner when you desire something instead of letting it linger. you’re standing up for yourself more in love this year, which will make all your romantic relationships all the more fulfilling. 

SHORT ADVICE FOR YOUR SIGN!

ARIES ·

focus on inner child healing, this year, and on connecting with the divine through fun ways. it’s one thing to pray and meditate every day, but how else can you connect with god, more like a child would? consider learning a traditional dance, or just dancing more. wear more traditional garb, visit festivals, draw out your prayers instead of writing or saying them. let loose and enjoy your spiritual journey. 

LEO ·

you are greater than your anxiety and fear. you are greater than all those thoughts and worries that keep you up at night. remember this. don’t let your imposter syndrome control what you do and do not do this year. you are ready to embrace all the responsibility that is coming towards you, don’t let doubt win now that you are so close to winning. 

SAGITTARIUS ·

this year, patience, commitment, and consistency are your best friends. you want to achieve so much -- you want the perfect job, the perfect body, the perfect life -- but how can you have any of it, if you aren’t willing to work for it? don’t rely on motivation this year, at all. only rely on discipline. motivation will get you nowhere, but discipline will bring you everything you desire.  

TAURUS ·

look back, but don’t wallow. you cannot change what has passed, so what’s the point of falling into the trap of regret? and regret and regret? there is no going back, my dear, so stop focusing so much on it -- especially when what is coming towards you is so, so, so much better. believe this and keep moving forward with this in mind. 

VIRGO ·

this year, you are in charge of breaking the cycle. you are holding onto so many things that no longer serve you. you know what they are. these old relationships, old beliefs, old mindsets… all these things that are only keeping you stuck in this rut… it’s time to look within and re-evaluate what you actually need in your life versus what you are holding onto out of fear and desperation. 

CAPRICORN ·

why are you keeping yourself from enjoying all that life has to offer? doubt, fear, anxiety, imposter syndrome… these are keeping you from living up to your full potential this year. if you don’t speak up for yourself or put yourself out there, you reject yourself before you give anyone else the chance to. you lock the door on yourself. 

GEMINI ·

trust your intuition as it is guiding you exactly where you need to go, and exactly away from what is only going to hold you back. you are a powerhouse, my dear, remember this much as you go through this year. and you know yourself better than you allow yourself to think. 

LIBRA ·

ask yourself how you are holding yourself back from experiencing all of the above. you can have all of these things, but you may be keeping yourself from these things out of a deep feeling that you do not deserve any of it. who says you do not deserve success? who says you do not deserve love? 

AQUARIUS ·

your life will change this year. completely and entirely. in ways you cannot even imagine. know that you have prayed for this and you are ready for what is to come. to take a deep breath. hold it. let it go. and smile as you look towards the future and thank the divine for how this year will turn your life around. 

CANCER ·

it’s time to be selfish. you cannot pour from an empty cup. each time someone asks you for help this year, especially if it’s help that will drastically set you back, stop and ask yourself if they would ever do the same for you. if they won’t, politely decline and keep it moving. 

SCORPIO ·

after so long of being ruled by your depression and negative thoughts, this year is filled with positivity and friendship and love. open your heart to it. why close your heart and run away when this is what you have been asking for for so long?

PISCES ·

this year, allow yourself to let go. time and time again. let go of obsessive, of delusion, of expectation, and trust that things are working out in your favour. and ask yourself how holding on has kept you from moving forward. 

[belit0]

Heylloooooo. How are you doinnn?

Can you do a scenario where the reader offers to trim the hair of the founder's + indra + izuna. Their hair is so much damaged due to all the jutsu they practice and negligence. So the reader offers them a relaxing shampoo and hair trim.

Hey there!! Extremely tired, but holding up. I'm having vacations soon, so looking forward to that!

How are you nonny? Feeling and doing okay? 🤗❣️

I found this request so cute and funny that I had to prioritize it, lol.

Indra

- "I don't require any of that, my hair is fine, that's highly feminine, humiliating." It will take a lot of convincing, but both using good words and managing him without letting Indra realize exactly what she is doing, (Y/N) gets her husband to surrender to her hands. The Otsutsuki does not agree to step full body into the bathtub, bent over the edge and resting his bare chest on the fine cold marble. His hair rains down on the water and is submerged to a certain length, while she uses a cup to wet his scalp. Somehow, impossible in the awkward position but apparently possible for him, he relaxes so much that he stops protesting, accepting the washing in silence. Between massages, (Y/N) inspects the damage, and concludes that it is a sin for a hair as beautiful as Indra's, with golden highlights, to look so dull. Although he maintains impeccable body hygiene, he has no idea how to take care of his mane, dry and brittle from all the battles he's been through. He hisses when the water is too hot, and tries to end the whole situation, but once he's knee-deep in it, there is no way to escape. Indra does not usually turn his back, show his neck, or allow anyone to approach him with sharp objects while he is vulnerable and without sight, but today he makes an exception. After all, is his wife who we are talking about. With the cut, he's adamant about her not reducing its length, proud of its iconic longness, and (Y/N) only succeeds in cutting off the split ends. When he looks in the mirror, he complains about losing a lot of hair, even though he genuinely hasn't. A tiny child, in the body of the worst villain of them all.

Madara

- "Yeah... that might be nice... let's see if it gets me out of stress." He surrenders himself to (Y/N)'s magical hands like a cat, allowing her to manipulate his hair and do whatever she wants with it. The girl suspects that if she were to chop off his mane like his father had it, as relaxed as Madara is in his special bath, he wouldn't even notice. Either way, she gives up the idea of playing a joke on him and concentrates on soothing her husband's scalp, bringing the unique pattern of his hair back to life, and restoring a bit of its shine. Gentle shampooing here, cream bathing there, soft drying to keep it damp enough to cut... The Uchiha actually falls asleep while his wife washes his hair, and (Y/N) appreciates how deeply he trusts her, enough to unwind under her fingers. When his mane is finally clean, she wakes him up to get out of the water, pulling him out of the bathtub and sitting him on a chair. With the scissors, she gets rid of all the unsalvageable parts, removing the fire-scorched hair and leaving only the healthy, reducing the length by considerable amounts. Madara, ignorant of any decision she might make about the size or style of her cut, reads a book while sipping a cup of tea, seated cross-legged like a gentleman. Solely dressed in his bathrobe and with his hair full of hooks to separate it in parts, he looks like a lady enjoying a day at the spa. When she finishes, he doesn't even bother to evaluate himself in the mirror, oblivious to his image and unconcerned about what his wife might have done, fully trusting his judgment and accuracy. He is happy and loves his new/almost identical image.

Izuna

- "What? No, there's no way. I said no... well, thinking about it... no. Well, maybe yes..." Another little child. Izuna refuses to admit the damage to his hair, and a whole week passes from the official proposal (Y/N) did, about taking care of his image, until he decides to accept. Manipulated by candy and promises of steamy nights, the Uchiha can't say no, and hands over his mane for his wife to control as she pleases. His hair is considerably thinner than his older brother's, less dense and bushy, but the problem lies in those unruly strands at the back of his head, near the scalp. A mixture of straight and curly hair, how to treat it is a puzzle, but she is determined to find out. She can't get him to take a bath, Izuna claiming he already showered in the morning, and only manages to wet his hair at the kitchen sink, with the man reclining on top of the counter and trying to squeeze the length of his hair into the cramped space. Even though the experience is uncomfortable, he refuses to get in the shower again and insists they do it this way. Needless to say, the kitchen ends up completely soaked, the floor full of water and the cabinet as well, foam floating all over the surfaces. Once ready, they proceed to the cutting, and the Uchiha himself stands in front of the mirror, suddenly excited and engaged in the task, marking the limits he intends (Y/N) not to exceed. He becomes the leader of the situation, and is genuinely pleased with the result. Promises to remind (Y/N) about doing the same thing every month. Every, single, month. Without fail.

Hashirama

- "YES! ARE WE DOING IT NOW?!" In fact, he is the most excited of them all, and is the one who prepares the items (Y/N) might need. On his free afternoon, the Hokage looks for scissors with sufficient sharpness, and in the absence of the right ones, goes to buy them. He prepares his special shampoo, because we all know this Senju is obsessed with having perfect hair, and readies a bathtub with warm water for himself. All the things she intended to set up for him, Hashirama gets them in an hour and surprises her by sitting in the tub with the shampoo in his hand, smiling from ear to ear. He provides instructions on how he likes to massage his own scalp, which areas are sensitive, and where to pay special attention, guiding each movement without the need to physically control (Y/N's) hands. To make the experience more pleasurable, she follows each step, executing it the way he asks. He cannot finish without first applying one of the most expensive conditioners in the world, which he requires her to leave on for at least ten minutes. In the meantime, and with two cucumbers in his eyes, Hashirama relaxes. When he is dry and ready for the haircut, he suggests the idea of styling his hair in a similar way to what he used to wear when he was a child, and it is (Y/N) who has to get that terrible occurrence out of his head. Pouting, he agrees to sit in the chair and let her control this part of the process, without being in charge of the technical direction. He ends up with a cut the length of his middle back, and smiling because he loves it! According to her, there's not much difference from how he had it before, but he doesn't need to know that.

Tobirama

- "You don't need to take care of it, my hair is fine. And if needed, I can do it myself." He has an irrational fear of losing some of his incredible intelligence if he cuts his hair, and has a bit of trouble accepting the offer. (Y/N) can't stand the strawiness of his hair, and Tobirama refuses to admit that's true. Stubborn and dismayed by his wife's approach, he will first try to work it out on his own. He is extremely embarrassed when going to the beauty and cosmetic store, asking for help "for a friend who has bad hair", and accepting guidance on what products "his friend" should use from the young man who works as a manager. When he gathers the necessary information, he refuses to shop at that same establishment and goes to one at the other end of the village, just so the manager won't judge him. He waits until late at night to proceed, once (Y/N) is asleep, and begins his experiments. The problem is he treats his hair as if it were an object of study, misapplying products and cutting off parts he shouldn't have. In the morning and without having slept, he has to admit defeat amidst his own fatigue and disappointment, and agrees to let her take over. He created a mess on his head, with uneven strands and even somehow managed to stain it with a strange color, but nothing she can't fix. After solving the texture problem, using the same products but in the right way, she corrects the premature cut Tobirama tried to self-manage, equalizing each strand's length and leaving his hair presentable again. He won't admit he made a mistake, at least not without crossing his arms over his chest, closing his eyes, and pouting, but he does acknowledge how good his hair now feels.

[netscapenavigator-official]

People in the notes of my post about Tesla removing the gear selectors from its new cars, asking how that's even legal, clearly have no idea just how incompetent and slow-paced the NHTSA is.

Halogen headlights weren't legal until 1979.

Composite headlights (the uniquely designed ones that aren't the old-school circle or square ones you see on older cars) weren't legal until 1984.

Adaptive High Beams (Matrix Headlights) were only recently legalized, in 2022; and the regulations and testing procedures in order to approve them are so haphazard and over-complicated compared to Europe's that not a single automaker has even made them available.

Side Curtain airbags still are not mandated in the United States.

Turn Signals can be red in the U.S., as opposed to the statistically safer amber which is mandatory in Europe.

Making that worse, those red turn signals are allowed to share lamps with the brake lights. This means if you have your turn signal on, 1/3 of your brake lights can’t do their job because they're too busy doing another job.

There is no law in the United States dictating that an electric car must put on its brake lights when Regen braking. In fact, the law specifically states that only the friction brakes are required to activate brake lights. You can bring a Hyundai Ioniq 5 & 6, Kia EV6, Genesis GV60, and many other EVs to a rapid, complete stop without ever activating the brake lights.

Early model Chevrolet Bolt EVs and some Mercedes-Benz EVs will activate the brake lights appropriately when slowing down, but will deactivate their brake lights once they've come to a complete stop, allowing the car to sit at a standstill in the road without any indicator that it isn't traveling at the same speed as you are.

It's completely up to the automaker to decide how (or even if) to implement regen brake lighting. EVs and Hybrids have been around since the late 1990s and this still hasn't changed.

The US government STILL only evaluates a vehicles crash safety by crash testing it at 35 mph into a flat wall and t-boning it with a barrier representing a 3,000 lb sedan. They don't do an offset frontal test or a truck-barrier side test like the IIHS has been doing for private insurance companies for over a decade.

The NHTSA performs ZERO pedestrian crash safety tests like EuroNCAP does.

Oh, and on the topic of gear selectors, those aren't regulated at all. Here are some examples from modern cars, both electric and not:

BMW i3 & Nissan LEAF (Electric):

Toyota Prius (Hybrid) & Honda Clarity (Plug-in Hybrid):

RAM 1500 & Cadillac Escalade (Gasoline):

The automotive rules of the American government are pure chaos, and that’s if they're even there at all. If you're seriously asking how Tesla can allow a car to select reverse on its own, and then put the manual override in the touch screen, I mean, that's just scratching the surface.

If you wanna learn more, Technology Connections on YouTube has some great videos on the Turn Signal issue, the EV Regen brake light issue, and the history of the headlight regulations. I highly recommend you check them out because it truly puts into perspective just how awful the NHTSA is at doing its one job: keeping safety standards up-to-date.

[beta-therapy]

Your Beta Status: Fate or Free Will?

As evidenced by the fact that 2/3 of our ancestors are female, it is a fundamental characteristic of the human species that women exert strong selective pressure onto men in the form of sexual selection, causing some men to have radically higher reproductive success than others. Women can only give birth a few times in their lives, so it makes sense for them to be picky.

But picky for what? What are women hardwired to be turned on by and turned off by?

The harsh truth is that primarily, the answer is genetic suitability. The main purpose of sexual selection is to weed out the bad genetics and to promote the best genetics among the species.

Although this idea is obvious, there is a common (and reasonable) objection:

Humans are not animals. Men don’t have some crude fight-to-the-death where the strongest alpha gets the woman. Yes, sexual attraction is unconscious and governed by biology, but a woman is genuinely turned on by the personality of her sexual partners rather than by some barbaric display of genetic superiority.

The problem with the objection is that those attractive masculine personality traits are inseparably tied to genetics. While it appears, on the surface, that a woman slept with Chad because he’s funny and witty, the deeper reality is that he demonstrated his intelligence, verbal facility, social calibration (lack of autism, for instance), and like ten other elements of genetic superiority, all in a way that cannot be faked. And if he was short (an indicator of insufficient androgen output during puberty or other genetic issues), she would not have even been talking to him.

Clearly, women are after genetics (they usually don’t know this consciously), but they select the winners in a highly sophisticated way, which makes it impossible to fake genetic superiority. This evaluation is about both physical and mental characteristics, but do not be fooled: there’s no “pathway” for any man to learn how to demonstrate attractive personality traits (beyond the standard advice of “be a good person”); the reason those traits are so attractive is exactly because they cannot be mimicked and therefore say a lot about your genetic suitability.

The personality traits that women go for are anything but arbitrary and socially conditioned. There’s a reason why the “awkward” and “shy” men are cross-culturally perceived by women as unattractive, whereas the “confident” and “dominant” men are universally fawned over by women. Those differences in attractiveness are not just random! They boil down to a fundamental judgement about which men deserve to spread their seed.

The definition of Nature is what selects. It is made up of many forces working in tandem, with the force of Femininity at the pinnacle. After all, Nature is what creates and what destroys; and the most important type of creation is the birth of children, and the most important type of destruction is the ending of one’s genetic lineage.

You can think of Femininity (and, more generally, Nature) as barbarically cruel, but truly essential for the existence and continuation of humanity. Life does not exist without suffering. A species cannot master its environment without an eternal process of disposing of the bad genetics and promoting the best genetics to allow for rapid adaptation in the proper direction. (And not just with genetics; with ideas in general).

The eternal objective of life is to generate a lot of new ideas, new things, and new genetics; and to note that many of them will be mistakes that must be disposed of, but some of them will be so crucial as to be required for our survival. This process is a necessary condition of life, because without it, we are stagnant, and stagnation inevitably results in Death.

Mistakes must go to die, and good things must prevail, but for that to happen, cruel selection must take place. In the world, we realize the harsh reality that not all ideas are equal, which can be quite uncomfortable for someone who believes in a bad idea, but their ultimate defeat by better ideas is what’s necessary for the collective. But what’s the most uncomfortable type of defeat by Nature? It’s the judgement that the totality of you is not good enough to make it to the next generation. Women are the ones who make the most harsh, judgmental decision of Nature. Femininity is the graceful, nurturing, beautiful mother who is nice to everyone, but through her sexual decisions, inevitably must put men on a hierarchy of “worthiness of reproduction.” And your position on this hierarchy is not something you can take lightly. It’s not based on random socially constructed nonsense. If you are not perceived as an attractive, desirable partner by women, that is Nature’s fundamental judgement that you are inferior (in the deepest possible sense) to other men.

Note about tipping: There is an option to tip me on the main blog page tumblr.com/beta-therapy (and also on each individual post for computer users). My content will always be available for free because I want to reach as many people as possible. If you enjoy my content and want me to continue to produce better and better posts, and you have some extra money, please consider tipping. Thanks!

[valiantverses]

The Azrael Series: Chapter One

(Simon 'Ghost' Riley X Reader/ Slowburn/Sort of Enemies to Friends to Lovers)

°°°°°

Summary/Notes: Task Force 141 is assigned a new member to deal with Makarov for good. Highly-skilled, brutally efficient and devastatingly competent, Ghost has met his match - and finds himself at odds with the SAS Fraternization Regulations as getting to know you makes him re-evaluate a life he never thought to allow himself.

°°°°°

Chapter One

Introduction 1

@beansproutmafia @chinuneko @agustdpeach

Click.

Ghost watched you methodically assemble your rifle, noting how deliberate each movement was. You worked smoothly - barrel into receiver, scope in place, alignment done perfectly. He met your eyes as you surveyed the area, sliding in casings into the magazine with focused intensity.

Not sparing him another glance, you turned to look into your scope, securing the perimeter. Out on the craggy cliff face of the unforgivingly frigid Ural mountains, escape would not be easy. The only thing keeping you from being spotted was the taiga camouflage you wore and the relative cover of the copse of rocks you had climbed on to next to the lieutenant, chest pressed flat on to the rough ground as you settled yourself into a prone position.

"Alpha Two, in position and operational."

Your voice was clear through the coms, unhampered by the face coverings you wore even as your warm breath created soft puffs of vapour, swirling lazily into the air.

Next to you, Riley shifted, your sides touching as he took a final look over the perimeter and inconspicuously - attempting to, anyway - looked over your rifle to see your handiwork.

"Alpha Actual, in position and operational."

His voice reverberated through the rock you had both deemed fit to survey the target location - A laboratory nestled in a valley in the Ural mountains that served as a logistics facility for Makarov, protected by the mercenaries he hired.

"Copy, Alpha Squad. Bravo Squad getting into position, T-Minus 10. Maintain positions. Over."

"Copy." "Copy."

Twin voices rang out, and then there was a silence, a chasm between you and the lieutenant.

You did nothing to break it, comfortable in the stillness of the break of dawn, even as the lieutenant continued to sneak assessing looks at you.

Though your file spoke for itself, experience and skills clearly laid out for the entire team to peruse in black - admittedly mostly redacted - ink, it was another thing entirely to trust a new teammate to watch your back.

Station Chief Laswell had attempted to soothe the situation, utilizing lots of what you recognized to be CIA mediation training to make the mission seem like less of what it was.

But the message was clear to you immediately upon receiving team assignments.

Ghost was babysitting you.

It didn't matter, you decided. You were the unknown variable in a well-oiled machine that had been training together for months. A factor that could put the team at risk so long as they didn't know - or trust - you.

Acceptance would come. Or it wouldn't - you rarely found the kind of stability needed to forge lasting relationships in this lifestyle.

Hunching your shoulders as the wind picked up, you meticulously cleared each area of your assigned quadrant, catching sight of Sergeant McTavish as he came into the view of your scope on the southernmost side of the compound.

Sergeant McTavish - Soap, as he had insisted you called him - had given you the warmest reception by far. He had taken one look at you during introductions and had been not just welcoming but outright friendly, giving you a wide smile and offering to take you on a tour of the team's home base.

You watched as Soap glanced behind him, jerking his head in the direction of the building closest to him as another hooded figure sidled up by his side - Sergeant Garrick.

Sergeant Garrick did not have quite the same warmness as Soap, but his wary smile had seemed genuine, facial muscles pulling up in such a way that your deeply ingrained intelligence training had told you was free of deception. He had offered to spar, and said that he'd give you a lay of the land outside the base upon return from this mission.

That's about where any sense of welcome started and ended with the team, Laswell and Captain Price had kept you at arms length, a clipped sort of professionalism. Lieutenant Riley was an apathetic sort of distance, and you had the sense that he was on the look out for any of your weaknesses and would no doubt be more than glad to pull out the Personnel Transfer Forms in his desk that had barely ever seen the light of day if you failed to live up to expectations.

You kept your breathing low and steady, the high elevations making the air feel thin. Next to you, you felt the lieutenant shift.

"Our directive mandates recon and reaction only, no active engagement."

His eyes on you felt like an itching in the back of your throat, easy enough to ignore but always at the back of your mind.

"Yes, sir." You affirmed, laser focused on clearing the western perimeter of the compound. "I was there when the instructions were given."

There was a pregnant pause where you continued constant surveillance, not even looking up as in your peripheral vision the blazing nothingness of freshly fallen snow was obscured by the bone white of your lieutenant's skull mask.

"I could do without your attitude, sergean-"

He had leaned in close enough to you that you were able to reach behind him to his nape and pull him in your direction, sandwiching yourself between his bulky body and the rough stone below. Before he could pull away, you tightened your grip on his coat, indicating with your free hand to remain low on the ground.

It had been subtle, well hidden, but the glint of a sniper scope aimed in your general direction had you reacting immediately.

Slightly winded from the lieutenant's weight on you, you reached up and clicked on your coms link.

"Captain, Alpha Two reporting. Hostile sniper positively ID'ed in area of operations. Westernmost building, clear line of sight of Bravo Team. Requesting green light for engagement."

You began to relax your arm but were quickly pinned to place by a hefty elbow as Ghost grabbed you by the collar of your coat, growling into your ear.

"Alpha Two heard. Confirm, Alpha Actual?"

Price's voice rang out of the coms, to no response.

Ghost snarled at you, placing his other hand next to your head, effectively locking you into place.

"Fuckin' hell sergeant, never heard of an anti reflect? Nine times out of ten a sniper has a sunshade o-"

"East facing window on furthest building, two windows down from the top floor. Sunshades work by blocking out light reflections but only with direct sunlight. The snow is freshly fallen and we're south- they hadn't accounted for the reflection of the sun onto the snowbank behind us. Nobody would expect hostiles on a blank cliff face-"

He grunted, keeping his eyes trained on you even as he reached over to look into your scope, bodies still pressed tightly together.

"Alpha Actual, positive ID'ed hostile? Over"

The captain's message once again went unanswered.

You shifted your legs a little, freezing when his thighs squeezed your sides in warning as he surveyed the westernmost building, the brutalist architecture starker in the snow.

You spoke in low tones, trying to get him to see your point. The low oxygen environment forced you to conserve your time spent talking.

"They're deeper into the building and have partial cover because of the drainage. They'd have direct line of fire on Sergeant Garrick and Sergeant McTavish. It'd be like shooting fish in a barrel."

"Alpha Actual, do you copy? Ghos-"

He huffed, the movement reverberating through you as he eased away from his position on top of you, falling into a low crouch behind the rock.

"Captain, hostile sniper ID'ed. West building, two windows from top. Clear line of sight on Bravo. Over."

There was another tense pause as the coms line grew silent, you taking the opportunity to roll over on to your stomach and keep watch on Soap and Garrick's position.

"Copy, Alpha Actual. Alpha Two, request to engage approved- Alpha Actual and Bravo Squad, maintain position."

"Copy, Alpha Two moving to position."

You wasted no time, disassembling your rifle in seconds, taking care not to let the snow into any openings as you turned to face your lieutenant and gave him a perfunctory nod, not waiting for his response as you left the relative safety of the rock formation.

The trek to the Southeast of the valley was arduous, the oxygen thin and the paths non-existent in the freshly fallen snow. Your lungs took in searingly cold air and your vision started to blur as the whiteness of the snow began to bleed into each other, the visor you wore being the only thing that kept you from snow blindness. Sometimes it became necessary to crawl on your hands and knees in the areas that were particularly visible to the valley down below. You did your best to keep your deep breaths from drowning out the coms, hearing Garrick and Mctavish's confirmation of identifying the sniper and entering an obscured alcove.

As you reached a copse of rocks that had the Western building in sight, you took off the gloves which the jagged rocks you had crawled on had embedded into and immediately began assembling your rifle, the familiarity of the metal body a comfort even in the frigid air.

You breathed in, then exhaled, before focusing on identifying the hostile sniper in front of you.

As your eyes began to adjust to the darkness of the empty room, a figure began to form, carved out of the inky blackness, partially hidden behind a mounted rifle.

The outside world stuttered to a stop. There was your breathing, low and calm. There was the enemy, looking up from their scope. There was your finger on the trigger, and then there was the the enemy's body jerking back, a bullet between his eyes as he slumped against the wall.

You waited.

You kept the corpse in sight of the crosshair, making sure the enemy's radio was within sight of you at all times.

Because if there was a sniper, then there would be a spotter, and it would just be a matter of who was more patient.

There was a flurry of movement as another person emerged out of the darkness and ran to their previous partners radio, stopping abruptly and collapsing as the insides of their skull became acquainted with the wall behind them.

"Captain, hostiles eliminated."

"Copy, Alpha Two. Bravo Squad, commence operation."

You kept your eyes trained on Soap and Garrick. You ensured they avoided engaging with the enemy, removing obstacles from their path before it could become a problem. Through the coms, you led them to the intelligence building and then back out, until they had successfully left the compound with Makarov's data in hand.

It was a perfect mission, and you could see by the pleased set of Garrick's shoulders, the twitch of Price' lips and the glint of Soap's eyes that the team really, really needed this win.

Evidently, not everyone was pleased with your performance.

Being the last one out of the chopper before debrief, you felt a hand on your shoulder, tugging you back until that familiar skull mask was in your vision once more.

"Liuetenant." You inclined your head, unsure of what he wanted.

"I don't like your attitude, sergeant."

"I don't need you to like me, sir. "

He remained silent, eyes boring into your own.

You regarded him, standing under the bright lights of the air hangar, mask and snow clothing so bright it almost made it hard to look at him. So you continued on.

"All I need is for you to know that on the field, I have your back."

Your lips quirked up as you managed a relaxed salute, muttering a 'sir' as you went to enter the debriefing room and began giving your report when everyone had gathered.

There was not a shred of doubt in your mind that the skull mask was trained on you the entire time.

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

Published: Jul 13, 2023

As experienced professionals involved in direct care for the rapidly growing numbers of gender-diverse youth, the evaluation of medical evidence or both, we were surprised by the Endocrine Society’s claims about the state of evidence for gender-affirming care for youth (Letters, July 5). Stephen Hammes, president of the Endocrine Society, writes, “More than 2,000 studies published since 1975 form a clear picture: Gender-affirming care improves the well-being of transgender and gender-diverse people and reduces the risk of suicide.” This claim is not supported by the best available evidence.

Every systematic review of evidence to date, including one published in the Journal of the Endocrine Society, has found the evidence for mental-health benefits of hormonal interventions for minors to be of low or very low certainty. By contrast, the risks are significant and include sterility, lifelong dependence on medication and the anguish of regret. For this reason, more and more European countries and international professional organizations now recommend psychotherapy rather than hormones and surgeries as the first line of treatment for gender-dysphoric youth.

Dr. Hammes’s claim that gender transition reduces suicides is contradicted by every systematic review, including the review published by the Endocrine Society, which states, “We could not draw any conclusions about death by suicide.” There is no reliable evidence to suggest that hormonal transition is an effective suicide-prevention measure.

The politicization of transgender healthcare in the U.S. is unfortunate. The way to combat it is for medical societies to align their recommendations with the best available evidence—rather than exaggerating the benefits and minimizing the risks.

This letter is signed by 21 clinicians and researchers from nine countries.

FINLAND Prof. Riittakerttu Kaltiala, M.D., Ph.D. Tampere University Laura Takala, M.D., Ph.D. Chief Psychiatrist, Alkupsykiatria Clinic

UNITED KINGDOM Prof. Richard Byng, M.B.B.Ch., Ph.D. University of Plymouth Anna Hutchinson, D.Clin.Psych. Clinical psychologist, The Integrated Psychology Clinic Anastassis Spiliadis, Ph.D.(c) Director, ICF Consultations

SWEDEN Angela Sämfjord, M.D. Senior consultant, Sahlgrenska University Hospital Sven Román, M.D. Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist

NORWAY Anne Wæhre, M.D., Ph.D. Senior consultant, Oslo University Hospital

BELGIUM Em. Prof. Patrik Vankrunkelsven, M.D. Ph.D. Katholieke Universiteit Leuven Honorary senator Sophie Dechêne, M.R.C.Psych. Child and adolescent psychiatrist Beryl Koener, M.D., Ph.D. Child and adolescent psychiatrist

FRANCE Prof. Celine Masson, Ph.D. Picardy Jules Verne University Psychologist, Oeuvre de Secours aux Enfants Co-director, Observatory La Petite Sirène Caroline Eliacheff, M.D. Child and adolescent psychiatrist Co-director, Observatory La Petite Sirène Em. Prof. Maurice Berger, M.D. Ph.D. Child psychiatrist

SWITZERLAND Daniel Halpérin, M.D. Pediatrician

SOUTH AFRICA Prof. Reitze Rodseth, Ph.D. University of Kwazulu-Natal Janet Giddy, M.B.Ch.B., M.P.H. Family physician and public-health expert Allan Donkin, M.B.Ch.B. Family physician

UNITED STATES Clin. Prof. Stephen B. Levine, M.D. Case Western Reserve University Clin. Prof. William Malone, M.D. Idaho College of Osteopathic Medicine Director, Society for Evidence Based Gender Medicine Prof. Patrick K. Hunter, M.D. Florida State University Pediatrician and bioethicist

Transgenderism has been highly politicized—on both sides. There are those who will justify any hormonal-replacement intervention for any young person who may have been identified as possibly having gender dysphoria. This is dangerous, as probably only a minority of those so identified truly qualify for this diagnosis. On the other hand, there are those who wouldn’t accept any hormonal intervention, regardless of the specifics of the individual patients.

Endocrinologists aren’t psychiatrists. We aren’t the ones who can identify gender-dysphoric individuals. The point isn’t to open the floodgates and offer an often-irreversible treatment to all people who may have issues with their sexuality, but to determine who would truly benefit from it.

Jesus L. Penabad, M.D. Tarpon Springs, Fla.

[ Via: https://archive.today/IRShy ]

==

The gender lobotomists just got called out.

[uncharismatic-fauna]

Prancing Peacock Spiders

Maratus volans is perhaps the most widely known member of the genus Maratus, also known as peacock spiders-- part of the jumping spider family-- which contains 108 recognised species. Maratus volans is common across Australia and the island of Tasmania, and occur in a variety of habitats. They are most commonly found among leaf litter and dry vegetation, especially in dunes, grasslands, and sparse deciduous forests.

Peacock spiders like M. volans are extraordinarily small; both sexes only reach about 5 mm (0.19 in) in length. Members of the Maratus genus are famous for the male’s coloration, and M. volans is no exception; the abdomen is covered in brightly colored microscopic scales or modified hair which they can unfold for mating displays. Some males can also change the color of their scales, and the hairs can reflect both visible and ultraviolet light. Female M. volans lack this distinctive coloration, and are a drab grayish brown.

Reproduction for M. volans occurs in the spring, from August to December. During this period, males will approach females and raise their patterned abdomens and third pair of legs for display. He then approaches, vibrating the fan-like tail, and dances from side to side. If a female is receptive, he then mounts her; if not, she may attempt to attack and feed on him. This may also occur post-copulation. In December, the female creates a nest in a warm hollow in the ground where she lays her eggs. Each cluch contains between 6 and 15 eggs, though females typically lay several clutches. Male M. volans hatch the following August, while females typically hatch in September. Both sexes mature quickly and typically only live about a year.

Like other jumping spiders, peacock spiders like M. volans do not weave webs. Instead, they hunt during the day time using their highly developed eyesight. These spiders are also able to jump over 40 times their body length, which allows them to pounce on unsuspecting prey like flies, moths, ants, crickets, and other, much larger spiders. Other spiders are also common predators of M. volans, as well as wasps, birds, frogs, and lizards.

Conservation status: None of the Maratus species have been evaluated by the IUCN. However, it is generally accepted that they are threatened by habitat destruction, like many other insects.

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Photos

Jurgen Otto 2 & 3

[miaatiny]

Moonlight: Part 2- K.YS (18+)

After being kicked out of your pack by your mate, you try to find a new pack. Things take a turn for the unexpected and now you have to hide a very big secret.

Warnings: angst, pregnancy, mentions of abortion, polyamory relationship (not reader), kidnapping MDNI!

Part 1|Part 2|Part 3

The morning was chilly with frost laying on the ground, a sure sign winter was coming. It was mid November and you set out on your search for a new pack. You were feeling sick to your stomach but ignored it. You didn't have time for that now. You had to walk to make it to Seonghwa's pack, as they lived in a secluded village much like where you had formally lived. You never minded the cold much either, being able to sense the weather. You knew what was coming.

You had been walking for at least two hours before you caught a scent. It wasn't unfamiliar, but it wasn't one of your old pack members. You stopped and looked around the clearing you had found yourself in. You saw a figure emerge from the trees. It was a she-wolf. She had long dark, wavy hair and caramel colored skin. The she-wolf approached and you backed down, submitting to this wolf to show you were no threat. Ther closer she came, you realized she as well, was no threat.

"Maya!" You yelled, with a smile. The she-wolf shared your enthusiasm.

"Y/n!" She yelled and you ran to her. Maya wrapped her arms around you in a hug. "What are you doing out here by yourself? You shouldn't be out here alone."

"Maya, I came to find you. I got kicked out of my pack. I have nowhere to go." You said, tears forming in your eyes once again.

Maya hugged you tightly. "Come on, I'll bring you back to our village." You both started for Maya's village while you told her what had happened.

"Nothing like this should ever happen, let alone to a she-wolf like you, y/n. I'm so sorry." Maya said, squeezing your arm.

You both approached the entranced to Maya's village. Where your former pack was based on water, Maya's was based on woodlands. It was secluded by trees and impossible to find unless you were truly looking for it. Maya led you to her cabin, where surely Seonghwa would be. You were on edge to see the alpha again, especially after your last run in with him. Him and Yeosang had gotten into a spat about hunting grounds. It definitely didn't end well. You highly doubt Seonghwa would be forgiving to Yeosang's former mate. Seonghwa knew Yeosang was fond over you. That made this all the more dangerous, but you had to try. Entering the house, it smelled of rich chocolate and coffee. Seonghwa's scent. But there was another one. Another alpha lingered here. Maya knocked on a door and Seonghwa's voice rang behind it. Opening the door, you seen Seonghwa sitting on the couch cuddled up with- another alpha. Seonghwa's demeanor changed seeing you. It went from happy and blushing to fierce. He jumped up along with the other alpha and they made their way over towards the both of you.

"Maya, why have you brought her here?" He whispers to his mate.

"She was kicked out, she has nowhere to go, Hwa."

"We can't just take in random omegas, Maya." Hwa said angrily.

Before Maya could respond, another voice chimed in, "Why don't we evaluate the situation before making rash decisions?" The other alpha said. He had light brown hair cut into a mullet type hairstyle that... suited him very well. The alpha walked up to you and grabbed your hand gently. Your hand became unusually warm. After staring at your conjoined hands, he suddenly looked up at you, his eyes wide as if he had seen something and turned to Seonghwa and Maya. "Hwa, this is something we can't ignore." The alpha walked to Seonghwa and grabbed his hand. Seonghwa's look softened and the other Alpha pulled away.

Seonghwa cleared his throat. "You can stay with us for the meantime, but you will need to find another pack before-" Maya hushed her mate and grabbed your arm to lead you out of the room. "I'll take you to a spare cabin we have. We'll get you settled." You and Maya walk towards the far side of the village to a smaller cabin compared to the rest of the village.

"It's small but it will do, I'm sure." The cabin smelled old and unused. Maya sat down on the bed as if she was in pain.

"Maya, are you okay?" You asked, concerned. Maya had always been the strongest omega you knew. Seeing her like this was unusual and concerning. Maya smiled at you.

"I'm fine. I'm just tired a lot more from carrying pups." This made your eyes widen as she pulled back her long coat and revealed her growing stomach.

"Maya, congratulations! Seonghwa must be so happy and proud he has pups coming." The she-wolf gave you an appreciative smile.

"Thank you, y/n, but they're not Seonghwa's." Your eyes widened in shock, unsure what to say.

"Then whose are they?" You asked, skeptically.

"The other alpha you met earlier, that is Hongjoong. The pups belong to him."

Polyamorous relationships in packs were rare, but not unheard of. You never expected an alpha like Seonghwa to share his mate. Maya interrupted your thoughts. "We found him after a bad storm made him lose track of his pack. Instead of looking for them, he decided to stay with us. He became rather close to Seonghwa and I. Things just went from there for us. Both of us love him very much and we'll love these pups just the same."

You nodded, slowly grasping the situation. You were a young, inexperienced omega. You've never been outside your pack so these things were completely new to you. Maya stood up as she heard Seonghwa calling for her. "I'll let you finish getting settled. Tomorrow, you can come with me to gather herbs in the field. Sometimes I help out our betas." She smiled.

Once again, you were left alone. You laid in the bed letting your thoughts consume you. It was around 5pm and you heard a knock on your door, and you got up to answer it. At your door was a rather tall male beta.

"I was told to bring you supper. My name is Mingi." He smiled at you awkwardly. You offered him a small smile of your own. "Thank you, Mingi. I appreciate it." You said, taking the bowl of hot soup from him.

"I heard you're coming with us tomorrow morning. Have you ever been gathering before?" The mention of gathering plucked your heart strings. You used to help your betas gather herbs before you were kicked out. The thought brings tears to your eyes and the male beta before you starts to panic.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry. Here, let me get Reina, she'll help-" Mingi begins stuttering over his words and you let out a breathy laugh. "No, it's ok. I just miss my betas from my pack." You wipe tears from your eyes. Mingi seems to relax a bit at that. "I'm sorry about your pack. That should have never happened to anyone." He says, sympathetically.

"It's okay, Mingi." You smile.

"If you ever need anything, I'd be happy to help." He smiles at you before walking back to his cabin.

The next morning, you had set out with Maya, Mingi and a couple other betas to gather some herbs in the field. Maya, despite her pregnancy, was still rather energetic. She would take breaks for a short while but would jump back with enthusiasm. You smiled at this. One day you hoped to be a strong omega like her. Mingi stayed close to you, telling you stories about his childhood. He liked to tell jokes and make you laugh and do silly things. Being around him made your broken heart somewhat whole again.

“Ah, later on I should introduce you to Yunho. He’s my best friend, and one of the most reliable alpha’s in the pack.” Mingi said.

You smiled at this. He had told you how him and Yunho would get in trouble as pups. Alphas and betas normally don’t hang out as they mature, finding new responsibilities in their designations, but this doesn’t seem like the case for Mingi and his friend. Based on Mingi’s words, their still close and causing trouble.

You had continued gathering herbs until late afternoon, when Maya said it was time to head back to the village. Mingi and you entered great hall in the far side of the village where pack members would share meals. You both had taken a seat and began talking of tomorrow’s plans when a rather large Alpha came up behind Mingi and they started play fighting. The Alpha had a cute, alluring smile. He was bigger than Mingi, but not by much. The alpha took a seat beside the beta and looked at you.

“Oh, y/n, this is Yunho!” Mingi said, excitedly. Yunho offered you a small, genuine smile.

“Hello, y/n. I guess you’re the new omega everyone has been talking about.” You blushed at this, especially hearing this come from another Alpha. It is an omega’s interest to seek praise from an Alpha. While it makes you happy, it causes your heart to hurt. Yunho looks at your neck and notices your mark. He decides to test the waters.

“Where’s your mate?” Yunho asks. Mingi looks up from his meal. Mingi had noticed your mark, but never had asked.

“I uh… I was kicked out of my pack after my mate sought another omega.” You slumped in your chair. You couldn’t look at the two makes in front of you, too embarrassed.

“Oh honey, I’m so sorry.” Yunho said. He reach out for you hand. He was caring, you could tell that. Being in his presence made you feel much better. You smiled to the alpha and began talking to both of them. This place wasn’t turning out to be so bad.

-----------------------------------------------------------

You've currently been with Seonghwa's pack for three months. You've adjusted well to their lifestyle here, and Seonghwa has even offered you a permanent place here. You've gotten close to Maya and Seonghwa's mate, Hongjoong as well. He isn't like other alphas, due to him being born to two betas. He helps with gardening and other beta activities. He has a very gentle and kind nature, much opposite of his alpha mate. Hongjoong shows a lot of love towards Maya and their unborn pups. It makes you wonder if you will ever find love like that again.

Today, you are helping, Mingi and Yunho look for rare herbs in the moorland. Yunho, despite being an alpha, doesn't mind helping his beta friend out on his chores. He also likes the adventure. You were gathering flowers to bring back to Maya when you suddenly felt very sick. You grabbed your stomach and began groaning in pain.

"Y/n, are you okay?" Yunho rushed over to you and helped you up. When you stood up to face him, Yunho's grip on you was tightened. You noticed his face turn white. "Yunho…”

"Y-you're..." Yunho started stuttering. Mingi broke Yunho's grip off you and hurried you away back towards the village. "Mingi, what's wrong?" You asked, scared. "I have to get you back to your cabin." Once back in the village, Mingi sat you down on your bed and rushed to get his fellow beta. You were scared and nervous. What was happening? Are you sick? All these thoughts crowded your head you didn't even hear Mingi return. He had Reina in tow and before you could ask questions, she put her hands on your stomach. She looked back to Mingi. "Mingi, go get Maya!" She yelled and turned her attention back to you.

"Reina, what's wrong with me? Am I sick?" You asked. You were shaking, and your stomach still hurt. Maya came through the door with Hongjoong moments later. Lately, anywhere Maya was, Hongjoong was close behind.

Reina backed up from you and looked at you with a smile. "You're carrying a pup." Everyone in the room grew quiet. Your eyes widened with shock. This couldn't be happening. Maya walked up to you and grabbed your hand. "Y/n, are you okay, honey?" You stood up and walked to the mirror beside your bed. You noticed a little bump starting to form. How could you have missed this?

Maya began shooing everyone out of the room. "Y/n, it will be okay. If you need anything, let me know, honey." You stood there, staring in the mirror as she closed the door. You didn't want this pup. You wanted it gone.

You had snuck into the medicine cabin that night. Being with betas so often, you knew there was herbs that could abort pups. You just had to find it. Looking through the bins, you finally found it. The potent smell making it impossible to miss. You just had to put it in some tea then problem solved. You were treading on dangerous ground. Being with Seonghwa's pack, you learned there were rules, and aborting your pup would be breaking the biggest one of all. You began walking to your cabin when you heard footsteps. You turned around to see Hongjoong.

"Y/n, what are you doing up so late? Shouldn't you be resting?" He asked, concerned.

"I'm fine. I just wanted some air." You said, trying to hide the herbs. Nothing got past Hongjoong, however. He smelled the herbs on you and he quickly darted and grabbed them. "Y/n, what are you thinking?" He asked, shocked.

With tears in your eyes, you reach out for the herbs in his hand. "I don't want this pup, Hongjoong. Yeosang made his choice and I shouldn't have to carry something that reminds me of my pain." You were sobbing so hard you could barely speak.

"You don't mean that, y/n."

"Yes I do. This pup was made from someone who lied to me and broke me. How could I love something like that?" You say as you wrap your arms around yourself.

Hongjoong steps forward to hug you. "I'm so sorry y/n. I never thought about it like that. But I can't give these back to you because they're forbidden. Seonghwa has rule, you know this." You nod, eyes puffy and teared. Hongjoong walks you back to your cabin.

"Y/n, you can always ask if you need anything. I'm always here." You nod in appreciation to the alpha. Hongjoong leaves you to your cabin. You curl up in bed. Why was all of this happening to you? It didn't seem fair. Eventually, you pass out from exhaustion.

The next morning, you hear people approaching your cabin. Your door flies open with two betas grabbing you by the arms. You're being drug out and you see Maya being held back by Seonghwa who is nodding to these betas. You see Maya is crying while Hongjoong comforts her.

"Let me go! What are you doing?" You scream for help, but no one is making moves to do so. You look to Seonghwa and see the familiar careless gaze your mate once gave you, when he kicked you out of your pack.

"I'm sorry y/n, but I have rules. No one aborts pups in my territory."

You look at Hongjoong who is giving you a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry y/n. Hwa caught me coming in late. I had to tell him." Maya is looking at with tears in her eyes. Hongjoong lead her back toawrds their cabin. Maya take sone final look behind her and mouths 'sorry' to you.

The betas drag you to the edge of Seonghwa's territory. You can't match their scent, meaning your more than likely being taken to a new pack. The alpha's drop you on the mossy ground once out of Seonghwa's territory and you catch a familiar scent. One you haven't smelled in three months. You look up and see Wooyoung, smiling at you.

"Hi, beautiful." He laughs. You jump up to hug him. Wooyoung was always so generous to you. He was always there to hold your hair back after a late night of drinking. He was always there to watch stupid romcoms with you on a Friday night when you didn't feel like going out with the other omegas. You pull back and he wipes tears from your eyes.

"Woo, how did you find me?" The look on Wooyoung's face has you worried, and for a second you thought you were saved. "I'm sorry y/n. I was sent to come get you. But I'm here to bring you home."

Home? No, there's no way you're going back. You take off to start running. You get away, bu the betas are catching up to you. Suddenly, they have you cornered between some trees. You're trying to yell for help, push them away, but its no use. You see a dark figure emerge from the woods in the corner of your eye. You don't get a good look of who it is before someone covers your mouth and all you see is black.

——————————————————————————

Chapter 2 of Moonlight is wrapped! I loved seeing all the feedback from Part 1! Originally, I only planned to have one more part wrote (Part 3) But I’m think I MAY need a part 4 hehe. We shall see! Thank you everyone for reading. I appreciate feedback very much!

miaatiny, 2023

[trash-king18]

M pt. 3

notes: no smut in these next few ones, there’s a build up loves but i promise more will come

cw: drinking, being drunk, overprotective miguel, soft miguel, arguing as always

————

it had been a few weeks since you’d talked to him. he was away on mission after mission. and he had to use an emergency injection on one so he didn’t need an infusion. the shots were highly concentrated and mainly to help him come down off of kill highs on high stakes missions. the more concentrated solution usually stayed in his system for up to month. they also caused some nasty side effects you were still trying to work out. 

you only knew he had used one from Lyla, since Miguel evidently refused to allow himself a single second of free time. He hadn’t even stepped foot in this dimension in days. Even though he knew he was supposed to let you do an evaluation and monitor symptoms after the shots. 

Peter B, Spider woman and Hobie had returned from their last mission and had all elected to go out for a drink, the other kids were there too but they were all underage. As much as they complained, you never let them come with. “go out” was sort of a loose term here there wasn’t a bar in HQ the only alcohol was whatever spiders smuggled in from other earths. But occasionally you guys liked to pop over to the closest universe and play music loud and have a couple drinks, play pool. just pretend to be normal. Spider woman was designated portal operator, of course, with a baby on the way. 

But this time you had more on your mind than normal. The anniversary of the incident was coming up and the situation with Miguel was increasingly frustrating. So this time, you may have gotten a bit drunker than normal. Hobie had left early to go help the other kids with babysitting Mayday. A few hours later when the three of you went back to HQ, they had to essentially carry you. You were giddy and off balance so you didn’t notice why they had stopped walking. a voice booms from up ahead. 

“you three, my office. now.”

shit

Peter helped sit you down in a chair once you got there, and you slumped over. 

“WHAT were you thinking”

Spider woman speaks first “alright o’hara you can scold the others like children if you want but we’re adults making adult decisions so talk to us as such” 

Peter props himself on her shoulder for support and offers up a slurred “yea” 

“If you want to get drunk that’s your prerogative, but i expect you do that in your own universe when you are ~off~ duty” 

Peter “cmon man you’re no fun”

“you— no nothing from you” 

all that gains him is a raspberry blown in his face. 

you’re still slumped over in your chair just listening to them argue. 

He walks up to Spider Woman 

“now him? i expect this from him” 

“hey man” 

they both turn to him in unison “shut up peter” 

“but you?” 

“we’ve done this plenty of times before and you’ve never seemed to have a problem” 

“but never with her.” 

“she comes all the time” 

“that’s not the point” 

“so what is” 

“so? you let her get drunk. you took her to an unknown universe, and let her get drunk in an un secured environment. she’s not like us, she could’ve gotten hurt! or worse!” 

“she’s an adult, she can handle herself” 

“not when she’s like this” 

“we were with her” 

“you’re pregnant and he’s..” he looks at peter before pinching the bridge of his nose before turning away 

“that’s never stopped me from handling anything before.” 

“but it was a risk you shouldn’t have taken, now get out and take ~him~ with you.” 

“what about her” 

“i’ll take care of it. out” 

she scowls at him but just turns muttering curses under her breath. “cmon parker let’s get you home to mj and may” 

“mayday!” is all you hear before she pulls him out the door. 

now it’s just you and Miguel in his office. he looks up at the ceiling and says something in spanish before turning back to you. 

he approaches your chair 

“y/n.. y/n hey are you alright” 

“now you care?” you slur as you swat his hand from your face 

he mutters 

siempre un placer 

always a pleasure 

before you can protest he picks you up and puts you over his shoulder. gently though, so he doesn’t risk you getting sick just in case. 

you protest, throwing curses at him in spanish. there’s few spider people left but the ones that are still milling about turn to watch this scene. he scowls at them and they immediately turn back to what they were doing. you curse and try to squirm your way out of his arms the whole way back to your apartment. it’s a code lock, like most rooms in that universe, but when he asks you for it you refuse. so he calls lyla up and has her give it to him. he opens the door and sets you down gingerly on the couch. 

you just lay back and groan trying to stop your head from spinning. being thrown over his shoulder didn’t necessarily help the dizziness. he walks away and you can hear him moving around. normally you’d yell at him for invading your space but you were too tired and too drunk. he was gone for a while and you called out for him but there was no answer. you tried to get up and stumbled over your own feet but before you could fall you felt a strong arm brace you. 

“can’t leave you alone for a minute”

“you left for three weeks just fine.”

it was a low blow, but you were drunk and cranky and you didn’t care. he didn’t say anything just lead you towards the bathroom. 

“i’m not sick it’s fine i just want to go to—“

but you’re cut short as he opens the door and you see he’s drawn a bath. 

“can you uhm.. do you need help with..”

“i can undress myself o’hara just get out” 

he frowns at you, he almost pouts, it’s cute 

but you’re mad at him. 

you climb in and sink into the tub and audibly moan at how good the warm water feels. you lay your head on the side and drink the water bottle he had put in there for you and try to sober up. 

you must have fallen asleep because when you open your eyes you feel better and the water is barely hot. you can hear clambering sounds outside the bathroom coming from the kitchen. 

you pull yourself out of the tub, you’re still a little unsteady on your feet but it’s much better than before. you open the door to find him in your kitchen cooking something that smells absolutely amazing. your stomach growls but you don’t say anything. he glances over but looks away when he sees you in your robe. 

“there’s clothes on your bed” 

“oh sure just let yourself into my room, and root through my drawers. i can pick out my own clothes” 

he ignores you and just keeps cooking. you fully intend to ignore the clothes he laid out but when you open your door you see that he pulled out your spider man hoodie. you curse silently as you throw it on. 

you come back out of the room and when he sees you wearing it he has a little victorious smirk on his face. 

you grumble something about him being an insufferable prick but that’s soon forgotten when he places a plate of tacos in front of you. 

you just look at him. 

“i didn’t even have tortillas how-“

“i made them”

“of course you did”

“eat, you need food”

“i know how to handle being drunk o’hara”

he just shakes his head at you 

“just eat will you?”

you don’t want to just to spite him.. but they look so good and you’re so hungry so you do. 

and he was right, you feel 10 times better after. 

you sit drinking more water as he cleans the dishes 

“why are you doing this”

“doing what”

“this.. everything, taking care of me”

“you’re my employee, it’s my responsibility as your boss-“

“oh cut the crap as my boss you give me a stern talking to and tell me to take a day off. not whatever this is”

“then it’s a favor in return for all the work you’ve done”

“that’s what you pay me for”

“what would you like me to say”

“the truth” you say slightly mocking him from that night

“ay eres tan— look i’m just trying to look out for you can i not do that”

you are so—

“if you can’t be honest about it? no.”

you get up

“i’m going to bed, lock the door on your way out”

“no thank you?”

“whatever, thank you, good night.”

you go into your room and shut the door behind you. you go to grab your heating pad from the top of the book shelf but you’re short.. and still drunk and you stumble and cause a few things to tumble from the shelf and you to fall over. 

“damn it”

“y/n? estas bien?

you good,you okay

“fine just dropped something i told you to leave” 

you don’t hear anything else so you assume he left until you hear your bedroom door click open slightly. 

“y/n?” 

he sees you on the floor and pushes the door open and comes to your side. but you push him away and get up on your own

“i’m. fine.”

“you fell.”

“really i hadn’t noticed” 

you turn around and start to walk to the bed but he steps after you capturing the front of your waist from behind with his hand. 

you don’t deny that his touch lights your skin on fire but you’re pissed at him. you know he’s emotionally stunted but that doesn’t mean he gets to not talk to you for weeks after what happened. 

you turn around quickly, his hand now on your back, you don’t move it

“hell no. you don’t get to come in here playing my white knight after you ignored me for weeks AND ignored my medical advice. something could have gone wrong with the injection and i would have no way of knowing. you could have compromised your health and the team. now i can handle whatever commitment issues you have because i don’t expect anything from you but i do at least feel i am owed an explanation and at the very least enough professional respect to follow my directions when it comes to your health and safety.” 

he just stares down at you dumbfounded, before a look of guilt washes over his face. his shoulders slump slightly and he doesn’t even try to argue. 

“really? you’re not going to say anything?”

you push his hand off of you and turn your back to him again. 

he whispers softly 

“cariño..”

“no. no. do not.”

“cariño please dejame explicar”

let me explain 

“stop calling me that”

“why”

“because that word is supposed to mean something, i don’t want to hear it from you when you’re not capable of doing or even feeling the things that come with that word”

“i-“

you sigh feeling deflated as the anger drains from your body you face him again 

“just go o’hara, please”

he’s genuinely pouting now, he looks sorry and part of you wants to give him a chance to prove you wrong. but you can’t risk it. 

“y/n-“

“~o’hara~”

he sighs 

“i’m sorry.. why don’t you uhm.. take the day off tomorrow, curtesy of your boss or at least come in late”

you don’t answer 

“just.. see how you feel in the morning yeah?”

“yeah fine i’ll see”

he leaves without another word and you collapse into your bed yet despite how tired you are you don’t fall asleep for a while. 

[yuurei20]

Trey Info Compilation part 8: Jade, Idia and Crowley

Trey has a comment during Beanfest that he doesn’t believe Jade is “the kind of guy who would dive into a group of enemies and go on a whole tear like Floyd did…”, and in a vignette we see that he has a well-meaning but poorly informed opinion of Jade: After seeing Jade put up with admonishments from both Azul and Riddle, Trey apologizes on Riddle’s behalf, saying that he feels guilty for not stepping in to wrangle Riddle.

Trey compliments Jade and Jade responds that is is an honor to receive such praise from him, which surprises Trey (“I don’t recall ever giving you cause to regard me so highly. In fact, we’ve hardly spoken”).

Jade compliments Trey for being quick witted and Trey encourages Jade to not be so humble. “I’ve been watching you for a while…you should whatever you want to do.”

Later in the same vignette Trey tells Riddle that Jade is easily manipulated, saying, “He really has it rough, Dealing with that day in and day out must be borderline torturous for a strait-laced guy like him.”

Somewhat more familiar with Jade, Riddle tells Trey that “When you evaluate others, you must observe them more closely.”

They eavesdrop on Jade talking about turning the first-year students into loyal pawns, and sharing secret information with Azul that he gathered independently from the instructions he had been given.

Trey reflects, “I have never been more wrong about anything.”

Trey and Idia do not have a lot of overlap outside of the Wish Upon a Star event, despite both being third-year students.

Trey does not seem to have a very flattering opinion of Idia (and most students do not), comparing him to “a child screaming ‘I don’t wanna’” and saying he honestly expected him to drop out of their performance at the last minute.

They interact in a Vargas Camp 2 vignette where Trey is friendly and happy to hear that Idia had originally intended to join the Science Club. Trey says it would have been cool to learn all kinds of new things from Idia, as, “I’d be hard-pressed to find a guy who knows more about digital technology and technomantic engineering than you.”

Idia calls the conversation exhausting, saying that while Trey might not be as pushy as others, “he JUST. KEPT. TALKING…I just hope he never tries to talk to me again, like ever…”

Seemingly unaware of Idia’s opinion, Trey finds rock salt in a mine and says, “I should show Idia too…I’m sure he’d appreciate hearing all about it.”

Like most of the students, Trey seems suspicious of Crowley: When he allows the Firelit Sky group to use the school’s mirrors to travel to Kalim and Jamil’s hometown Crowley says, “I will graciously accept whatever souvenirs you see fit to bring back” and Trey observes, “There it is. I knew there was no way he’d let us do this for free.”

In reaction to being selected as a Stargazer during the Wish Upon a Star event Trey says, “The headmage claimed he used astrology to pick us…you don’t think he was lying about that, do you?”

[bittersweetresilience]

Adrien Agreste and Borderline Personality Disorder

DISCLAIMER: I've been a bit low on spoons this week, so I haven't gathered as much evidence as I probably could have. Also, I am but a humble student in clinical psychology. This is mainly a thought compilation for @moonieratty!

To introduce the topic, without going into it too much, personality is described by features and behavioral patterns, or traits, consistent across situations and across time. Personality disorders are therefore enduring patterns of highly maladaptive traits evaluated in personal and sociocultural context (Dozois, 2019, p. 290).

Like other disorders, personality disorders have diagnostic criteria. The DSM is used primarily for diagnosis in the US and Canada while the ICD is used more widely in Europe and other places. I'm more familiar with the DSM, but I've included a brief section on the ICD to be comprehensive. It ended up a bit longer than anticipated, so let's go below the cut. Warning for discussions of abuse, self harm, and suicide, and a brief mention of substance use.

Overview of Borderline Personality Disorder

BPD is prevalent in a small percentage of the population, about 1-2% by varying estimates, and is characterized by instability across domains of emotions, identity, interpersonal relationships, and behavior. Its onset is usually in late adolescence or early adulthood and symptoms may diminish with age, after one's thirties or forties, especially with therapeutic intervention. Along with ASPD, it has been the focus of a lot of clinical research; it is unfortunately associated with high rates of non-suicidal self-injury and suicide (APA, 2022, pp. 754–755; Dozois, 2019, pp. 308–309).

Etiological factors for BPD include both biological and environmental disturbances. Of note to our discussion is the heightened risk for BPD in cases of child abuse or neglect, as well as growing up with another family member with a serious mental health condition (NHS, 2022). It's been well established that Gabriel is emotionally neglectful if not outright abusive toward Adrien in multiple ways, so this is a clear risk factor. In addition, although I won't argue definitively for Gabriel having a psychological condition, he did keep Emilie's body in the basement, so there is clearly some kind of disturbance going on.

From a cognitive-behavioral perspective, Linehan argues that BPD stems from families who consistently invalidate childhood emotional experiences and "oversimplify the ease with which life's problems can be solved," which may cause children to learn to seek attention and communicate with others through emotional outbursts (Dozois, 2019, p. 297). This rings true for Adrien and Gabriel as well.

I have to apologize for my son, Ladybug, he's like his mother. Way too overly dramatic. (Jackady)

It doesn't seem like this is the first time Gabriel has thought this, and labeling an emotional reaction as being overly dramatic is very much invalidation of it. As for emotional outbursts, Adrien has had quite a few, mostly as Chat Noir. More on this later.

To round out this first section, attachment theory proposes a connection between poor parent-child attachments and BPD relationship difficulties. Specifically, maladaptive behavior in relationships may stem from childhood development of an anxious-ambivalent attachment style, where intense fears of abandonment interfere with a strong desire for intimacy (Dozois, 2019, p. 310). You can clearly see this in Chat Noir's relationship with Ladybug, and I'm sure other people have discussed Adrien's attachment style more in depth, but suffice to say I think this is an apt description.

Argument from DSM-5-TR

In the DSM, personality disorders are primarily diagnosed on a categorical model. There are a few general criteria which I won't be going into, but I will highlight that personality disorders are stable and pervasive, and would be diagnosed only if they were leading to significant distress or dysfunction. Adrien's mental state is not great, so the latter shouldn't be a problem, but this show does not always pay attention to consistency, so I'm going to be speculating some. Everything in this section is cited to the relevant DSM entry unless otherwise stated.

The DSM characterizes BPD with instability in relationships, self image, and affects, as well as marked impulsivity. It has no exclusion criteria, so BPD can be and frequently is comorbid with other disorders like mood disorders, PTSD, and ADHD. Of the below criteria, five need to be met in order for a diagnosis to be made.

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment

Hey, where're you going? . . . So you're allowed to know her true identity, but I'm not? (Syren)

You're not really replacing me with a turtle, are you? (Anansi)

A lot of people have delved into Adrien's abandonment issues, which feature most prominently in his relationship with Ladybug. His fears of being replaced result in him seeking reassurance from Ladybug, and he can lash out if he does not receive the response he hopes for. Ladybug is his world, and he wants to be hers, so anything infringing on that feels to him like a threat of being abandoned, and he does not like it very much.

Impulsive behaviors like giving up his ring can be interpreted under this lens: he can avoid abandonment by doing the abandoning first. Then it will be him leaving, and not the other way around.

I also interpret Adrien's nightmare (Le Marchand de Sable) as being a fear of being alone as much as it is a fear of being trapped.

Unstable and intense interpersonal relationships alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation

We'll be united, more powerful and free. We'll defeat Hawk Moth, then we can both run away to an island! Far away from everything. We will live off nothing but fruits, and we will have a little pet hamster and we will name it— (Le Patineur)

I just can't do this anymore. I give up… on everything. Even you . . . If I become Chat Noir again, Ladybug will just end up rejecting me, over and over. (Kuro Neko)

Even though Adrien mostly keeps his head on straight regarding what he's owed and not owed by other people, his relationship with Ladybug is full of highs and lows. He thinks Ladybug is the most amazing girl, but this can recoil quickly into feeling as though Ladybug doesn't care about him enough or isn't meeting his needs.

Furthermore, he developed this idealization of Ladybug as a potential lover or caregiver at one of their first meetings (Cœur de Pierre), and continually sought to spend time together and share the intimate details of their secret identities early on. These are all common to individuals with BPD, as is the switch from idealization to feeling as if the other person "does not care enough, does not give enough, or is not 'there' enough." Ladybug is the only person Adrien consistently projects this instability and intensity on, which might be something interesting to explore.

Identity disturbance: unstable self image or sense of self

When I was a kid, I always wanted to be what my parents wanted me to be! (Exauceur)

But, does that mean Chat Noir is who I really am? Deep down inside? (Kuro Neko)

With all the secret identities, it isn't surprising that Adrien fits this criterion, but canon even explicitly draws a link between Adrien's unstable sense of self and his childhood experiences. He doesn't know who he is, and he distracts from this by being Chat Noir, only to struggle even more when he feels useless and underlooked as his hero self. His behavior shifts dramatically between trying to prove himself with grand gestures and refusing to participate or lashing out. There is definitely something to discuss on this front.

Impulsivity in at least two potentially self-damaging areas

Giving you some extra time . . . I trust you to bring me back, m'lady. (Gamer 2.0)

There are only two liars left in Paris and one of them knows the ultimate way to catch her attention . . . Crazy about you, m'lady. (Mensonge)

This is walking a thin line between impulsivity and suicidal behavior, which would be excluded from this criterion, but I'll list self sacrifice here because I can see an argument for Chat Noir's impulsive behaviors being out of love or the desire to be useful. There may still be some self injurious intent or euphoria, but Chat Noir does have faith in Ladybug to bring him back eventually. Nevertheless, this is impulsive and unhealthy. Chat Noir jumps too quickly to this option to have thought it through.

I can't think of another area, because Adrien isn't old enough for reckless driving, spending, substance use, or sex. This is also a kids' show. Just presenting these options for fanfiction writers out there.

Recurrent suicidal or self mutilating behavior, gestures, or threats

I... I don't know what to do! (Chat Blanc)

This is all our fault . . . Cataclysm. (Culpabysse)

By itself, what happened in Chat Blanc would not be solid evidence, as that was an unprecedentedly traumatic situation. Combined with Culpabysse, though, there is a strong case to be made for at least passive suicidality for this to be able to come up as an option.

You could also interpret the self sacrifice in this category. Suicidal behavior in individuals with BPD is often preempted by fears of rejection or abandonment, so an interesting analysis could be made on this front.

Affective instability due to marked reactivity of mood

He's still only thinking of himself! I just want this terrible day to be over and done with! I hate Christmas! (Pire Noël)

Sorry! Sorry! I didn't mean to make you so mad. I get it. You're sick of me . . . No one can help me, Kagami. (Glaciator 2)

Adrien's prolonged episodes of anger and despair reflect a high reactivity to emotional stressors, especially interpersonal ones. In general, he just doesn't feel very well unless something is actively bringing him joy. Most of his outbursts are brief, though, and I will discuss them as part of a later criterion.

Chronic feelings of emptiness

I'm not Adrien, so I wouldn't know if this is the case, but I can say he has experienced at least one depressive episode (Kuro Neko) and emptiness would not be unfamiliar. You can look at him and decide.

Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger

How was your amazing evening with your "friends"? . . . What do you think? (Glaciator)

Why not? No one'll know if I quit. No one'll care! (Syren)

A two-person plan?! There's only one two-person plan, and that's Ladybug and me! (Sentibulleur)

Give me a break, Miss "I can't even come up with a superhero name"! (Hack-San)

Anger in individuals with BPD can manifest as bitterness, sarcasm, or recurrent verbal outbursts, which Chat Noir absolutely exemplifies. These outbursts are often followed by feelings of shame or guilt and contribute to a feeling of being bad. Chat Noir apologizes after being harsh in Glaciator, and I wouldn't be surprised if he felt badly about the other times. Again, these outbursts are often precipitated by interpersonal fears and perceived threats of abandonment. Unlike other symptoms, this specific one tends to be unique to BPD.

Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociation

I cannot recall any evidence for this but headcanon away, my friends.

All in all, I think Adrien has a strong case for BPD presentation according to the DSM. Canon is not always consistent, but I think it presents an interesting and mostly coherent narrative for this lens. From this perspective, Adrien's behavior reflects a deep intolerance of being alone and a dependence on other people to define the self.

As a corollary, BPD behavioral patterns are frequently linked to self sabotage and self undermining right when a goal is about to be realized, which could manifest as dropping out of school right before graduating or ending a relationship when it seems to be going well. Food for thought. Individuals with BPD may also feel more secure with transitional objects like pets than with interpersonal relationships, which could reflect in Adrien's relationship with Plagg.

To add some subjective understanding to this clinical mumbo jumbo, I've added a source of genuine BPD experiences below (Mind, 2022).

Argument from ICD-11

With the release of the ICD-11, a dimensional model for diagnosis of personality disorders became the new standard. What this means is that individuals are no longer labeled as having 'histrionic' or 'dependent' or, indeed, 'borderline' personality disorders, but are rather assessed as having any form of personality disorder on a sliding scale of severity and with trait domain specifiers (Swales, 2022). To put it more simply, people are diagnosed only with a general personality disorder or personality difficulty which can be optionally specified as deviating on one of the personality traits in the Big Five model, which is well established in personality psychology.

This move has several benefits. Stigmatization related to particular personality disorders can be reduced, and differential diagnosis and comorbidity between personality disorders becomes irrelevant. However, people retain access to treatment and support. Evidence-based treatments like dialectical behavior therapy are particularly well established and crucial for BPD; for this pragmatic purpose, the ICD contains one additional specifier for borderline pattern personality disorder (Bach et al., 2022; Swales, 2022).

The DSM and ICD are designed to be compatible with each other in many ways, and in this case, the borderline specifier in the ICD is directly lifted from the criterion of the DSM (WHO, 2023, 6D11.5). Based on our previous discussion, Adrien would be equally qualified for a diagnosis in France. I would likely describe his personality disorder with moderate severity, where multiple areas of functioning are affected and self harming behaviors may be present, but not all areas or relationships may be equally impacted and traits are not as rigid and inflexible (WHO, 2023, 6D10.0–6D10.2).

Interestingly, the ICD includes three additional manifestations of borderline pattern which are optional and may vary across time (WHO, 2023, 6D11.5).

A view of the self as inadequate, bad, guilty, disgusting, and contemptible

An experience of the self as profoundly different and isolated from other people; a painful sense of alienation and pervasive loneliness

Proneness to rejection hypersensitivity; problems in establishing and maintaining appropriate levels of trust in relationships; frequent misinterpretation of social signals

I'm fascinated by the number of adjectives in here. I simplified very slightly, as I did with the DSM criteria, but I had to keep all these adjectives. Anyway, I won't elaborate for too many more paragraphs, so let's say sentimonster moment and leave it at that. I will spare you my mirrored Félix essay. For now.

Qualifications and Limitations

First of all, Adrien is a teenager. The distinguishing factor between a personality disorder and regular adolescent difficulties would be longevity and identity concerns beyond his developmental phase (APA, 2022, p. 758). Second of all, Adrien has a uniquely terrible home life and magical problems. Some of his behaviors could be normal considering his experiences and sociocultural context, and this matters when it comes to psychological evaluation. Take everything with a grain of salt!

More generally, the categorical model of the DSM has several issues, not to mention diagnostic issues related to culture, gender, and stigma. Some but not all of these issues are addressed by the dimensional model it includes in a later section, which shares theoretical foundations with the model of personality disorders in the ICD. Even so, issues remain. Diagnosis, access to treatment, and political statements are intrinsically linked in complex ways. I won't get into all of the nuances, but be safe, remember this is a fictional character, and keep an open mind.

REFERENCES:

American Psychiatric Association. (2022). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed., text rev.). https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.books.9780890425787

Bach, B., Kramer, U., Doering, S., di Giacomo, E., Hutsebaut, J., Kaera, A., De Panfilis, C., Schmahl, C., Swales, M., Taubner, S., & Renneberg, B. (2022). The ICD-11 classification of personality disorders: A European perspective on challenges and opportunities. Borderline Personality Disorder and Emotion Dysregulation, 9(1). https://doi.org/10.1186/s40479-022-00182-0

Dozois, D. J. A. (2019). Abnormal psychology: Perspectives (6th ed.). Pearson.

Mind. (2022, September). What does BPD feel like? https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/borderline-personality-disorder-bpd/experiences-of-bpd/

National Health Service. (2022, November 4). Causes - Borderline personality disorder. https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/borderline-personality-disorder/causes/

Swales, M. A. (2022). Personality disorder diagnoses in ICD-11: Transforming conceptualisations and practice. Clinical Psychology in Europe, 4(Special Issue). https://doi.org/10.32872/cpe.9635

World Health Organization. (2023). International statistical classification of diseases and related health problems (11th ed.). https://icd.who.int/

[faeriekit]

hey gang I gave in and wrote something for the Holy Ageswap, Batkid! AU after all :) :) :) :)  Whoops 🦇

Alfred turns the page in the Gotham Gazette.

It looks like there’s to be a stage show at the local theater next week. A performance of King Lear—normally, he would consider attending, if only to judge from a seat in the audience, but his usual operations have largely changed in the last few months.

For one, his free time has severely decreased.

“Alfred,” a tiny voice pipes up from somewhere around his knee. Alfred sets the newspaper on the plastic picnic table.

Bruce Wayne, second grader and aspiring crime fighter, has both hands fisting Alfred’s more comfortable dress pants. The boy isn’t stellar with eye contact— based on Alfred’s research, that may never happen—but he is a remarkably clingy child, when he can bear human touch.

“Bruce.” Alfred’s greeting is just as calm. Just because the other children in the kiddie gym may be raging doesn’t mean that Bruce doesn’t prefer quieter tones. “How was your lesson today?”

Bruce bounces on the balls of his feet, his little white socks raising and lowering. “I did a front flip today,” the boy reports, pleased. “Dick said I did a good job. I have a sticker now.”

A reward. Alfred does smile; he isn’t sure that Bruce fully appreciates the item itself, but the positive reinforcement Richard provides his students is certainly appreciated just as much. “May I see it?”

Bruce pulls his sleeveless shirt forward until Alfred can see it. With his reading glasses, he can somewhat make out a little blue figure with some sort of shield.

“Ah, Captain America,” Alfred realizes. His wire frames return to his breast pocket. “No Gray Ghost, of course, but highly respectable.”

Bruce hums, and kneads the fabric trapped in his hands. Alfred knows perfectly well who Bruce’s favorite crime-fighter is; after a few movie marathons, trips to thrift shops and secondhand sales to find more tapes and merchandise, and re-readings of the novelizations, all at his new charge’s request, the preference has become clear. There is no one who reigns in Bruce Wayne’s favor above the Gray Ghost. “Dick let me pick last, so I had more time to make a decision.”

“That is very kind of your teacher. Are you ready to say goodbye for the evening?”

Bruce nods. In the same way that he is uncomfortable with eye contact, he is often uncomfortable with prolonged skin-on-skin contact, so Alfred doesn’t offer to hold his hand. Bruce keeps himself tucked away at Alfred’s side, perfectly content, with three slim fingers keeping him latched onto the edge of Alfred’s wool jacket.

They are usually one of the last to leave the gymnasium, if not the last. Bruce usually wants to report about all he’s done for his lesson, and then takes a moment to dress himself in daywear once more, all at his own pace, before they leave. It’s optional to speak to the coach on their way out, but Alfred prefers to; although he is retired, and has no intention of either returning to his field of work or introducing Bruce to it, he still appreciates supervising and evaluating Bruce’s training for its level of quality.

Richard is a fun sort of lad. Loose—in the way that young men have been, he wears his hair long and enjoys colorful fabrics. In the gym, he wears his dark hair up in a ponytail and throws cotton tees on over his shorts.

“Hey, Bruce!” Richard recognizes, and waves. Bruce silently waves back. “Ah, and you’re his guardian. Alfred, right?”

No assumed family connection. Alfred accepts the handshake. “Rightly so.”

Richard grins, white teeth and patience. “Excellent! Well, I’m happy to report that Bruce is coming along well in his class. He’s very dutiful with his exercises, and works very hard on mastering the newer tricks we learn in lessons. I’m sure he’ll be able to place up into one of the higher level classes by next year.”

Bruce, of course, is touched, and kneads the fabric of Alfred’s jacket that much harder. The little nuances of childhood’s strong emotions. Alfred will never understand them.

Richard leans down, ever so slightly. It’s not low enough to be condescending, but manages to make himself at least more equal with the height of the child. “Do you remember what we worked on today?”

“Yes!” Bruce declares, happy to have an answer he knows. “First we sat down on the mat and then you told us about how the gym is going to be closed next week because they’re replacing the climbing net and then we did our warm ups and we did butterfly legs and we stretched out our arms and then we stood up so tall—“

“Bruce has an excellent memory,” Alfred explains to a clearly flummoxed gymnastics teacher. Bruce’s recitation of events does not end. “When we get home tonight, he is going to repeat the entire lesson on his mattress. I am certain he is going to ask for gymnastic mats for Hanukkah.”

Richard laughs and laughs until he runs out of air. He surfaces with tears in his eyes. Bruce accepts a very careful high-five, swiftly changes in the single-stall family bathroom, and is escorted to the car by his older guardian. Bruce buckles himself in and hugs his gym clothes.

They drive back to Wayne manor.

“I think Dick has secrets,” Bruce announces, apropos of nothing. His feet kick against the seat.

Alfred hums. His eyes stay on the road. “Oh?”

Bruce nods. Alfred catches the last edge of the gesture in the rearview mirror. “He has a lot of big scars under his shirt, and always knows if you’re beside him. Sometimes he practices before class, and he’s really good at climbing stuff. He has big knives in his locker.”

Alfred mulls over the stated observations. Well, the observations are valid at the very least. However:

“I believe we have discussed respecting others’ personal boundaries, Bruce.” This has been a frequent point of contention.

Bruce’s huff is audible. He is no doubt crossing his arms in the back seat. “Alfred.”

“Bruce.” Alfred is firm on this point. “Your aspirations of detective work are to be admired; however, you are still eight, and could be removed from your class or otherwise fined if you are caught. Breaking into one’s personal possessions remains illegal.”

Bruce goes silent. The sound of kicking feet stops. They sit, quietly in the car, as Alfred drives them home through dingy back streets of urban Gotham.

He really only turns to face his charge once they hit a red light. “I did notice, however,” Alfred continues, half as sly and satisfied besides. “That Richard has very prominent swordsman’s calluses.”

The boy, of course, lights up. Beyond his love of Gray Ghost and learning new detective skills, Bruce loves, beyond all reason, new clues. “I saw," Bruce breathes, fists balled up as he veritably shakes in his seat. “When we high-fived! What do you think??”

Alfred rights his position for appropriate levels of concentration whilst driving. “Well,” Alfred admits. “There is no point in making any assumptions now, of course. We only have half the information.”

“Aw.”

“We can, however, perform a very thorough background check.” Perhaps it isn’t ethical to bribe young children with borderline legal methods of informational gathering, but it does keep him occupied between his school hours and his extracurriculars. Alfred will take what he can get. “Would you like to learn how to gain access to several forms of paperwork when assessing someone’s trustworthiness?”

Bruce kicks the seat again, thrilled, squeezing his little gym bag taut in his arms. He buries his face in it, overwhelmed, and only surfaces for a second to shout: “Yes!”

“Good.” Now there will be something to do after dinner. “Now, don’t forget to wash your hands before dinner. We’re having pot roast.”

“Thank you, Alfred!”

“You’re very welcome, Bruce.”

[justtoomuch]

Do you have any headcannons or just general vibes you wanna share about the "Leon rescues Ethan in Louisiana" Au? I gotta admit, it's seems like a really fun idea and I'd love to know more about it

Sure! Leon was actually sent to the Baker Estate to rescue a highly esteemed journalist but when he got there he was forced to shoot that person who has become infected. He's now devastated because that was kind of his only job, but he finds Ethan and changes his objective because he just wants to save a single person and if there happen to another civilian around then that's who he's saving. They form a sort of Leon-Ashley situation through the Baker Estate except Ethan doesn't want to just sit back and be a victim so he tries to fight as well but Leon won't let him.

They argue a lot, with Leon trying to keep Ethan on a short leash for his protection and Ethan rebelling against that. Then they have a major fight where Ethan points out that Leon wasn't even initially there to save him, and proclaims that no one is willing to help him save Mia. He eventually chooses to separate from Leon (against Leon's will) to go find her, but he fails to save her and has to kill her.

Leon eventually finds him and comforts him in the best way he can (he's not very good at it but it comes from the heart, he knows what it's like to lose people, and especially to be the person who had to pull the trigger.) He convinces Ethan that the best thing to do is to get up and save himself because that's what Mia would have wanted for him.

Ethan agrees and they reunite. Leon tries to raise Ethan's spirits by giving him more agency and letting him defend himself, despite his own fears of failing Ethan.

They are both captured by Lucas who prompts Leon to either sacrifice himself or watch Ethan die. (Wow thematic stuff! Leon has to evaluate whether his desire to save people has to do with wanting to make the world a better place, or is just a result of his pride.) He doesn't have to make the decision because while Lucas is talking to Leon, Ethan breaks free and impales Lucas through the chest with a metal pipe. (Now that's metal af.) They both make a run for it.

Leon is impressed by Ethan's resourcefulness and they escape the house on a boat, eventually getting airlifted by a BSAA helicopter. Ethan is taken into BSAA custody and Leon argues with Chris about that. Chris says that there's a low chance Ethan will be integrated back into civilian life as he has too much information. This reminds Leon of how he had been forced into being an agent after Raccoon City. He asks Chris for the BSAA to retrieve Mia's body for a proper burial.

Leon attends the funeral and stands across from Ethan, watching him and his family mourn. He decides there that he's not going to give up on Ethan and calls Chris, asking him to be a part of Ethan's transition into whatever his life is going to be with the BSAA. Chris agrees.