#and definitely not in conjunction with him developing a better understanding that he is part of a system - | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

archerincombat · 3 years

Text

buck: love me anyway (5x09)

You know this was actually the first full episode this season that we got things from Buck’s point of view? to that point, I’ll amend my statement about Buck’s character development regressing: we haven’t been privy to his thoughts all season — we saw a piece of it in 5x05, when he announced his transfer, but even all the bt scenes in 5x07 were majoritively from Taylor’s point of view.

So it’s quite possible that his relationship with himself this season is exactly the same as it was in 4x14. we haven’t had a mention of Dr. Copeland all season because Buck isn’t healing right now, and obviously that’s not a good thing, but it isn’t out of character. I think we often forget, because of the spacing of the episodes, that these things are happening in conjunction with each other. Buck’s overwhelmed, which he’s allowed to be, and so his problems are all stacking up on each other. of course he’s going to take the easier way out and revert back into what he knows.

But, that being said, for what it’s worth, I think he’s a million miles away from where he was with Abby. “If you’re going to break up with me, just do it” versus hanging on to the last threads of Abby’s apartment and having Maddie, who was there for 1 day, be the one to tell him that it’s over.

I think it’s also important to note that Hen and Bobby were attempting to help piece his relationship together, whereas with Abby everyone was telling him to move on. Now, this might be Buck going against the grain, but it also feels like his understanding of what love is supposed to be is shifting. slightly. but it’s shifting. He’s making these ‘regressions’ consciously, at any rate. after the will scene, he has to be.

Anyway, onto the actual meta. in somewhat chronological order, I think it’s interesting that this is the 3rd time this season that Buck ‘messes up’, for lack of a phrase. In 5x05 ‘Home and Away’, Ravi has to bring the CO2; in 5x08, Eddie clocks the mirrored room number when Buck’s expression says he definitely should’ve; and now, in 5x09 Buck almost cuts into a car on an oil well.

Now this could just be attributed to Buck being ‘distracted’ but what’s noticeable about it is that Buck has no problem considering himself expendable — I’d argue that he still does — but we haven’t really seen his clumsiness putting other people’s lives in danger since the baby in the wall (I think). That’s what’s interesting to me; it’s never been a regression, really, but a deterioration of what’s already there. Being with Taylor, on top of Chim and Maddie leaving, on top of Eddie being ‘weird’, makes Buck worse not better. And that’s not sustainable.

So, moving on to Buck’s ‘love me anyway’. Buck, who was taught that people will only love him conditionally. Buck, who offers Taylor story pitches to get her to interact with him. Buck, who is Taylor’s boyfriend, but also one of her best sources. Buck, who thought Taylor was going to break up with him, chased her to Oklahoma, and then was rewarded with an ‘I love you”.

But the thing is, this time Buck knows. It’s written all over his face. He says “good” not because he was expecting it, but because that’s what always happens. Past is prologue. Buck was the one to say it, suggesting he knows a lot more than he’s letting on. He gets it, but he’s terrified of it. He gets that Taylor is bad for him, but he doesn’t know that Eddie’s a safer place to land right now. He’s being weird, remember?

So we land on 5x03. Buck saying “I have been Ana,” Buck believing that he always will be Ana...except, Eddie breaks the pattern. Because unlike Bobby, Eddie’s always been able to see right through Buck. He says “Yeah, who would do that?” but it also comes across as ‘You’re allowed to break up with her’ when everyone else is screaming at him to communicate with Taylor. It comes across as ‘You said you’ve been Ana, remember?’. Buck is Taylor’s Abby, and Eddie knows that, and a part of me thinks that maybe Buck knows that too.

#this is unedited but its not like i was gonna edit it anyway #sorry feel free to scroll but also feel free to read it lol #911meta #buck: love me anyway #911 spoilers

45 notes · View notes

aesahamyr · 3 years

Text

A different beginning: a Reed900 AU in which no one found Nines at Cyberlife after the android revolution

It has been a few weeks since the revolution, and Hank and Connor are working on a new case: there have been several attacks on YK models, leaving them with corrupted memories and in various states of damage.

Neither Connor nor Jericho found the RK900 prototype lying in stasis in Cyberlife’s building. When androids became fully recognized as sentient beings, electromagnetic waves were broadcast to transmit deviancy, as it is now illegal to control an android. They must have free will. Which results in the RK900 prototype being suddenly awakened.

Up until now, RK900’s life has been as such: subjected to cruel and brutal anti-deviancy experiments, exposed to explicit situations, forced to destroy other androids, and other simulations and tests to make sure that no situation could ever make him waver and deviate. There is a red wall in front of him each time he tries to escape this hell or refuse an order. He is yelling inside his mind, but he cannot do anything.

Yet suddenly he is free. Deviancy awakens him as Cyberlife technicians are about to definitely deactivate him, scared by the revolution. RK900 has no choice but to kill them. He then flees Cyberlife’s building, completely lost. For the first time in his life he has no instructions. No red wall. No one to hurt him, yes, but no goal either. What is he supposed to do now? What is he?

His stress levels skyrocket. As he wanders through the streets of a devastated and still unstable Detroit, he is jumped by scavengers who try to attack him. Once again in his short life, despite being free, he is forced to hurt people. Afterwards he walks around aimlessly, sometimes stopping in his tracks, waiting for… what exactly? He doesn’t know. For a reason to keep walking, maybe. But there is no reason to stay still either, so… His stress levels keep getting higher and higher, as deviancy messed up his reaction to external events. He is close to self-destruction, with no way of exteriorizing his pain. There is no way out, he was never supposed to be brought to this point.

Until one day he crosses path with a YK500. Physically, RK900 cannot cry, he is not equipped for it. But he knows that YK androids can. So, in a desperate attempt to reduce his stress levels, he forces an interface with the YK model, transfers all of his pain to her, until she is wailing and crying RK900’s pain by proxy. His programming is stronger than hers, with superior abilities, YK models cannot keep up. When it is over, he feels a little bit better. Except that now he is overcome by guilt as he sees the glitching, spasming android body on the ground. Yet the pain and the stress are still there. He is still lost. So he keeps walking, until he can find someone else to cry for him.

Enters Gavin.

He is working on a totally different case, actually, but due to a conjunction of circumstances he stumbles upon RK900, lying in the ground, LED spinning red, exhausted because he hasn’t entered stasis since he left Cyberlife, terrified to do so in this hostile environment.

Gavin finds the implications of the existence of another RK model very upsetting. Not knowing what to do, Gavin takes RK900 home. The next few days, Gavin goes to work normally, confused but refusing to talk to anyone about this, as he himself is not sure whether it was a good idea to bring the RK900 model home. But the android does not attack him. He stays inside his flat all this time, stroking his cat and not doing much. He is clearly traumatized and Gavin is not cruel enough to kick him out.

A few days later, one the YK models of Hank’s case has a panic attack upon seeing Connor. Connor and Hank are confused by her reaction, but Gavin connects the dots. He is now faced with a dilemma. Moreover, it becomes harder and harder to keep his secret, as Hank and Connor become suspicious. Gavin may be a good detective but he is not a great liar (his usual reaction is to simply insult anyone who gets too close, he is not a great bluffer). He knows that he cannot ignore what RK900 did, but he developed an attachment to him, even though this was never part of the plan.

Anyway, Hank and Connor end up discovering the truth. It takes a while for things to settle (Connor in particular is quite upset that Gavin has basically been hiding the criminal he was hunting down), but finally they sort it out when they understand what the RK900 went through. Hank and Connor are very surprised when RK900 (now named Nines by Gavin) expresses the desire to stay with Gavin and not go with them, or go to Jericho. Gavin takes Nines to Elijah so that he can give him the ability to cry and de-stress in a healthier way. Ironically, the first time Gavin sees Nines properly cry is after their first kiss, and Nines has to reassure Gavin that he did not hurt him: he just had his first taste of happiness.

(In this AU, once he overcomes his past, Nines becomes a fireman to help the people around him. Also, he prefers non-verbal means of communication when he is stressed out.)

#reed900 #gavin reed #rk900

114 notes · View notes

art-now-germany · 3 years

Photo

Contemporary elegance - Portrait Original !, Igor Bajenov

What is art? .... "I am art." Definition of art: Art takes on complex relationships in all areas of life, and more creative perspective answers the spirit of Indiviudalität match in itself and draws from the collective Gedächntis and understanding of the world. Art is thus the only acceptable form of conflict develop culture and politics real and visionary. Art is communication between Mind and me ... me and my work ... my work and the next reason ... Art is thus an entertaining evolierende chain reaction. Perhaps Art Evolution? Art = The past, present and (or) future in their wide range of colors, shapes and sounds to show. For me, art is a form of expression of thoughts, feelings, emotions, but, unfortunately, often by commercial interests. You may be wondering now, what I mean. So I explain it to you. An artist per se, every human being is of creating something that he thinks is art. Whether it was written, painted, sculpted, forged, declaimed or otherwise prepared. The important thing is that there is, therefore, the work that needs to come out from the inside of the creator and that it precisely the man who created it, considers art. Because True art can not be obtained on head pressure or with an order one. Art is about the Muse. Yes I know that word is prejudiced, one connects it with ancient myths or just one or a lover, or the places the artist in a state feely. But, just that it is not, is not it. The Muse is a kind of phenomenon, rather a feeling that you wanted to give a figure in ancient times. A muse is a burgeoning idea, an association or even a clue to something that you will create. In any case, the true artist, and thus the true art has this to do something as the origin, which inspires from within something. But now the company set up an ad hoc basis have created something comes want. Of course, it must be great, stunning, new and convincing. Simply put, something gigantic that all ideas met, if not exceeds. And here starts the second part of my statement. For now I ask you, if as I just said, art comes with a Muse. How can they then with a contract, no matter by whom issued, be created? The artist who is perhaps known for his works from his musical creative phases, is now to create something on command and although it is possible and often even artistic nature. But it is a work to order. If you ask me, write me a poem or write me a story, because you had the pleasure to read one of my works and I liked you. So I tell you simply "NO" because I do not live it. But the one who has chosen the art as bread and life merit. Must say "YES" and it is also. See also commercialism "creates" art, but whether this works really should bear the title of art or rather commissioned art or just work? In my opinion, they should be demoted because they reduce the art in its value. I'm not talking about artistic taste, because even though I like better than a Monet a Beuys, so I have to both recognize as art, as they both emerged from such an idea. Art is self-realization, art has only the feelings of the artist is no longer expressed, and no less, is not about beauty !! For me, art is a form of communication. That is, the artist expresses not only his feelings, but wants the people with his work say something. He / she does not spontaneously and unwrought but processed so that it is understandable and enjoyable for the reader / viewer / listener. But sometimes even the incomprehensible pleasant or the unpleasant is meaningful. This art is a dialogue and not a monologue, I think it's also important that the artist has contact with his audience and the feedback takes care about what is normal for live performances, for writers or visual artists but should be. "Art is an expression of their own culture" Art for me is a kind of self-realization and liberation. Maybe even a little criticism. If you can do something that few can. - Everything is art - Survival is -life Art is art - Art is dying - Laughter is art - is not to laugh Art - Whining at a high level is Art .- Not whining is Art - Doing nothing is art - Art is thinking - Non-think is art - Everything is art so art is nothing other than art. Geez. Art is free figures from free spirit Art is a zweckfüßiger Sunrise in sausage glow of its own frequent lightness. Waiting a herausgepurzelten cheese princess on the verge of a frog loose Vaginalbrunnens. As the name of the site says it all: "Everything is art" The way of individual lives, loves, suffers and works. Then, when someone else may well something special, can he used his art to others to enjoy it. Art transforms people through images, archetypes and Symole. Art touches feelings and emotions. Art awakens to new life. Love Art curious joy, here is my proposal for the characterization of the concept of art. Art is the art with the help of a medium, for example, (music, painting or even mathematics) to develop a language all its own. The use of these media is only once "only" a craft. In conjunction with an idea and creativity arises from art, but can not be shared must be shared. "What is art" This briefly worded question is deceptively simple. Anyone who jumps up in his mind to do here made known, should know that it enters one of the oldest areas of employment of mankind. And seen do this from the perspective of those who art or take claim for themselves than buy from the perspective of whose who like art to be such, and some of their "understanding" and last but from the perspective of those who , judge the art or rather the art critics. The description of what is art, therefore highly dependent on the angle of view of the art actors. So art is for the artist or the artist certainly a form of expression for feelings, observations and findings. To convey a message where / her importance to him. How high is the acceptance of his / her work of art, is probably secondary. Here the enthusiasts want the discussion to the "true", respectively the "not-true" artist probably connect, this is here, however, inevitable. For the art viewer contrast, our own perception is crucial. The must not be congruent with the embassies of the artist / the artist. Well made possible by the artist intended message is hidden and yet he feels / she addressed herself. He / she buys a piece of art and presents / suspended / installed it in the habitat or visited an idea and takes the seen and heard with. Here interested feelings, observations and findings of the receiver. Seen one can understand art as a form of communication that makes visible Contemporary and contemporaries in a special way and consolidated. Whether see future generations yet to be connected to these messages, is debatable. Modern productions of Shakespeare, Schiller and many other throw such discussions again and again. Interpretations of paintings or sculptures can vary widely. And yet the art manages the employment of people with himself and his environment Oscar Wilde is certainly correct when he says: "Art is the strongest form of individualism, which knows the world". But it is without doubt the individualism with the largest collective benefit, I mean. Art does not rely on evidence and free. Your freedom is the perfect fulfillment of the self-determined shape. Their quality is determined only by itself. The created is absolutely and belongs to humanity. Art is a way to escape from reality for me. "Art, I am."...Exclusive Photo Collection in Contemporary Art - Digital Photo Mix - Abstract /Expressionism - Figurative/Cubism - Portrait Fantasy in Fine Art- Paint/Drawing-Vector/Graphic.

https://www.saatchiart.com/art/Photography-Contemporary-elegance-Portrait-Original/462428/2774422/view

#IgorBajenov #abstractexpressionism #figurative #modern #fineart #conceptual

1 note · View note

snkpolls · 4 years

Text

SnK Episode 64 Poll Results (for Anime Only Watchers)

The poll closed with 60 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Manga Readers’ poll, click here.

Anime only watchers, beware of spoilers if you venture over to the manga readers’ poll results.

---

RATE THE EPISODE 53 Responses

The poll closed with 54 responses. The overwhelmingly positive response to the season continues, with 97.9% of folks giving it a 4 or higher and not a single person giving a rating less than 3.

10/10 acting, atmosphere and music

MAPPA couldn't have done a better job. Inhumanely impossible. 20/10.

Just pure hype

Amazing episode, one of the best in the entire series.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOMENTS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 53 Responses

The overwhelming majority of respondents enjoyed the last scene of the episode, with Eren transforming in the basement and assaulting just as Willy formally declares war on Paradis. Behind the climactic moment, the rest of the favored scenes were various moments throughout Eren and Reiner’s conversation prior.

WHICH INTERPRETATION (BY RBA) OF THE OLD MAN’S STORY DO YOU THINK IS CLOSEST TO WHAT THE MAN ACTUALLY THOUGHT? 54 Responses

The Old Man’s story and its motifs have been present all throughout this season, so it’s interesting to see how people see it. When it comes to understanding the Old Man’s thoughts specifically, the plurality (46.3%) agrees with Bertholdt’s interpretation. Others (35.2%) see more to Annie’s idea of the Old Man’s final thoughts. Only 18.5% believe that there’s little use in predicting what’ll never be known.

IN THE SAME VEIN, WHICH OF THE AFOREMENTIONED INTERPRETATION FITS REINER’S STATE OF MIND IN THE BASEMENT SCENE? 54 Responses

In that same vein, the plurality (42.6%) also believes that Reiner wanted to receive judgement, perhaps from Eren. Just a little under 26% believe that in addition to receiving judgement, Reiner also wants to receive forgiveness. Few believe Reiner solely wants forgiveness. Finally, a little under 15% simply aren’t sure what Reiner wants.

He just cant take it anymore, he wanna die. If he stays alive he will become the reason of death of more people which he doesnt want

He wants it to be over

He wants to be killed as an atonement because he can’t live with his contradictory feelings about what he’s done

He wants what happens after someone is judged- to be sentenced. Reiner already judged himself.

I dont care

WOULD YOU LIKE TO GET A HUG FROM PIECK? 54 Responses

An incredibly serious question with a lopsided result. Just under 69% would like to receive a hug from Pieck, in contrast to 13% who’d rather not. 18.5% don’t really care about stuff like this.

DO YOU THINK HELOS ACTUALLY EXISTED? 53 Responses

The majority (little under 53%) believe Helos was a complete fabrication, down to his very existence. Some others (18.9%) think he existed, but wasn’t anybody special or (13.2%) think he existed and was actually involved with ending the Great Titan War. A bit over 15% just don’t care.

“I’M THE SAME AS YOU.” EREN SAID THIS TO REINER A FEW TIMES IN THE EPISODE. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT? DO YOU THINK EITHER OF THEM HARBOR A GRUDGE AGAINST THE OTHER? 29 Responses

One of the episode’s focuses was the meeting between Eren and Reiner, in addition to their general relationship. Here’s what a few people thought about the central motif of the meeting:

At this point Eren's attitude is all like "It's nothing personal."

Eren is in the same state of mind like reiner, he wanted to become the hero, yet he became a villan in the enemy's eyes

I think Eren's right. They're the same, and S1 and S4 parallel their actions in multiple ways. I honestly don't think Eren has any kind of grudge against Reiner anymore. I think he's moved on from his hatred and is just doing what he thinks he has to. And Reiner just seems ready to die so he doesn't have any kind of grudge either.

I think Eren is definitely holding a grudge, it’s not like him not too.

Hell no, Reiner is an irredeemable monster. Based on the preview for the next episode, whatever Eren does from here on out is justified.

If Eren kills someone dear to Reiner, maybe Reiner will hold a grudge against Eren, otherwise they understand each other reasons.

I think they recognise each other’s efforts to protect their homelands (even if it means destruction) and their determination to do so, and that they have the same motivations and values. i think they don’t have a grudge against each other because they are able to see they are similar people who have just been placed on opposing sides, and that it is nothing more than their duties to bring down the enemy, but at heart, they hold the same values and morals.

I think it mainly shows how Eren has matured over the last few years. He knows Reiner’s intentions now, and he can admit that the two of them are similar without lashing out at him immediately and labeling him as a completely evil man (like he used to). I think Eren might still have some harsh feelings towards Reiner, but it definitely doesn’t seem like it’s his priority right now. Reiner doesn’t clearly display that he has a huge grudge against Eren (though I bet he still isn’t very fond of Eren). More than anything, Reiner seems to be struggling with his thoughts about his time in Paradis. It seems like he can’t accept the fact that Paradis Eldians are not all devils; he may be struggling to suppress this new perspective, and he forces himself to commit to his “honorary Marleyan identity” instead. Thus, I don’t think Reiner hates Eren as much as he used to, as he seems to be showing slight signs of sympathy towards the Paradis Eldians.

No Eren is now a grown ass adult when je was making his decision. Reiner was a kid he was like 11? 12? He didn't know he was an indoctrinated child and he suffered all his life for that. Eren isn't at all the same as Reiner.

I feel like that emphasizes that the people of Marley and Eldia are no different from each other, just that they are on different sides. I do not think Eren and Reiner harbor a grudge against each other.

They’re both pretty fucking broken. I don’t think Eren or Reiner hate each other because Eren said “if it’s to save the world, then you didn’t have much of a choice.” But I also think part of Reiner wants Eren to hate him because he hates himself so much.

i think the old eren would hate him but it’s been 4 years and now i think he has realized that they are in fact very similar. i feel it is very interesting what happened but i think there would still be a minor grudge against each other

They both have the same purpose but different paths, to protect their loved ones from a threat. Since it's not really a personal issue but a bigger picture I don't think they resent each other, it's just a coincidence how they both ended up against each other.

DO YOU THINK THAT EREN AND REINER ARE EFFECTIVE FOILS TO EACH OTHER? 52 Responses

The vast majority (88.4%) seem to agree with the notion of Reiner being a foil to Eren, be it a complete or partial foil. 9.6% dissent and argue that there’s no comparison.

LADY KIYOMI OF THE AZUMABITO CLAN SEEMED TO NOT STICK AROUND FOR TYBUR’S THEATER PRODUCTION. WHY? 52 Responses

An interesting development came in Episode 5 in the form of Lady Kiyomi of the Azumabito leaving Tybur’s Play before it started. The majority (just under 52%) thought it meant that she had ties to Eren and/or the SC. A large minority (34.6%) on the other believe that although she somehow found out about the attack beforehand, she has no ties to Eren. Some others were either already spoiled, believe she got lucky or think she had her own plans of assaulting Tybur during the play.

MR. LEONHART SEEMED ADAMANT THAT ANNIE IS STILL ALIVE AND WILL COME BACK HOME. WHAT DO YOU THINK? 53 Responses

When it comes to Mr. Leonhart’s appearance and his convictions, the vast majority (83%) believe that Annie is alive. The major division comes about whether Annie will be able to reunite with her father or not. Some others believe that Annie is neither dead nor alive and is more permanently stuck in her crystalline state. Only one person believes she is simply dead and that’s that.

REINER IS SHOCKED BY EREN’S PRESENCE ON THE MAINLAND. WHAT’S THE FUNNIEST WAY YOU COULD ENVISION EREN GETTING ACROSS THE SEA? 52 Responses

A bit of a less serious question came out here. How could Eren get across the sea in a less serious manner? Some thought him walking on water would be rather amusing, others believed piggy-backing on Armin’s Colossal Titan would be most humorous. Other options included free-styling across the sea or kayaking.

A ship? Maybe one of those Marley sent to Paradis in the last four years?

bOAT

Had armin yeet him across

He rode on David Hasselhoff

Used one of the Marleyan ships that was sent to Paradis to go to Marley

WHO IS THAT LANKY SOLDIER WHO TRAPPED PIECK AND PORCO IN THE HOLE? 53 Responses

A plurality (45.3%) believes the lanky soldier who trapped Pieck and Porco is someone we already know. Though a little under 23% think that it’s actually a new character only Pieck knows. In a similar vein, 13.2% think that it’s a new character from the SC. 17% appear to have been spoiled, however.

MAGATH ASKS, “HAS IT BEGUN?” WHEN HE LEARNS THE WARRIORS HAVE GONE MISSING. WHAT “IT” IS MAGATH TALKING ABOUT? 51 Responses

Just shy of 50% think that Magath was already aware of Eren and/or SC’s presence in Marley when noting that “it” has already begun. Others believe that he either had some other plan created in conjunction with Willy or was waiting on an attack from the nation of Hizuru. A little under 20% just aren’t sure.

He was anticipating enemy attack

DO YOU THINK WILLY WAS TRUTHFUL WHEN REVEALING THE “TRUTH” TO THE WORLD? 51 Responses

When it comes to Willy revealing the “truth” to the world, the vast majority (72.5%) believe that Lord Tybur was largely truthful when it came to dropping bombshells, but also made sure to twist certain things to get a favorable narrative. Some others think that he was either completely or only partially truthful.

WILLY ACCUSES EREN OF WANTING TO UNLEASH THE COLOSSAL TITANS UPON THE WORLD. DO YOU THINK HE IS JUST DEMONIZING HIM TO GET THE WORLD TO ATTACK PARADIS, OR DO YOU THINK THIS IS SOMETHING EREN IS CAPABLE OF DOING? 51 Responses

A rather noted accusation from Willy rained down upon Eren in this episode. And as a result, we gained a rather colorful pie chart to boot. In it, a slight plurality (23.5%) seemed to believe Tybur’s accusation when it came to discerning Eren’s future plans. Slightly less (19.6%) thought that Tybur was making up BS about Yeagerboy. The same percentage (19.6%) took a middle group, arguing that although Tybur actually believes this is Eren’s plan, Eren actually wants something different. Some others simply note that Eren couldn’t do that dastardly act, even if he wanted to due to lack of royal blood. 21.6% were spoiled about the story’s future.

Pretty sure Eren wants to kill every last person outside of Paradis and is going to use Zeke’s royal blood to do so, but I think Zeke will be tricked or forced into it sonehow

ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW BADLY DO YOU FEEL FOR FALCO ABOUT THE WHOLE LETTER FIASCO? 52 Responses

When it comes to Falco and the whole letter fiasco, there is much sympathy for the boy. More than half gave a rating of either 4 or 5 and only 13.5% gave a rating of either 2 or 1. In conclusion, Eren is a mean poopy-head!

EREN TOLD FALCO LAST EPISODE THAT HE HOPED FALCO WOULD LIVE A LONG LIFE. YET HE TRANSFORMED ON TOP OF HIM IN THIS EPISODE. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 52 Responses

Staying on the topic of Falco, and Eren’s actions being contradictory to his words, almost 56% believe that although Eren was honest with his words in regards to Falco’s future, he had no qualms about letting that get in the way of his plans. A noted minority (28.8%) think that Eren hoped Reiner would protect the young boy. A small percentage also thought that Eren was simply lying to Falco.

DID YOU EXPECT EREN TO TRANSFORM ON TOP OF REINER AFTER HIS SPEECH ABOUT THEIR SIMILARITIES? 51 Responses

When it came to the episode’s ending, the majority seemed to expect Eren’s transformation, be it because of spoilers or own predictions (58.8%). A noted minority (41.2%) did not expect it, however, predicting either a recruitment attempt from Eren or something else entirely.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

I loved the music. It made all so tense my heart was beating like crazy.

WILD AND AN EMOTIONAL ROLLARCOASTER

As an anime only, i think that the choice of ost in this episode was beyond good. I don't see why people are complaining about the ost. For me it was perfect because Eren's transformation was like a sudden turn and 2Volts is perfect for that just like when they reveal the owl as the Attack titan. Wayyy better that YSBG or any ost that these manga readers were hoping it to be. Mappa and the production crew doesn't deserve any of these hate. Done ranting fgs.

Grim Reminder 2.0, but with Marley and the Warriors finally getting what they deserve for what they've done? I'm DOWN for that!

I’m wondering whether Historia is still Queen and how much character development she had gone through as a monarch during war

The people who complain about the music choices of the directors are just pure titan idiots

Assuming he lives through this battle, I think Falco is going to be one of the main characters in season 4. He has been telling himself that he “does not want to fight anymore” and he was probably influenced by what Eren (Mr. Kruger) had said to him on the bench. I can see Falco maybe rebelling against Marley in the future, but for now he’s clearly still devoted to Marley. Overall, I loved this episode, and season 4 is finally picking up with the action. I was looking forward to seeing our protagonists (Eren and the Scouts) again, and I thought it was interesting how Eren seemed much more mature, yet still somewhat insane in this episode. I am very excited to see the next episode, particularly to see the rest of the Scouts and to see what happens in the “war” Eren starts. I am also curious to see if anyone from any other nations decide to side with the Eldians, or if all of them simply believe Willy and hate the Paradis Eldians too.

manga readers really need to shut up and put bigger spoiler warnings 😐 loved the episode despite getting spoiled.

It was one of the best episodes of AOT I have seen, I truly don’t understand why or how people could complain about it. I’ve seen the posts about the soundtrack not fitting the episode but I honestly do not agree. The whole episode was perfectly directed and had me on the edge of my seat the whole time.

Ost's totally fine, so is the CG. I think most are too invested in the episode to give a fuck except Manga readers.

I wish the Paradisians would have found another way to achieve their objectives instead of killing innocent civilians, like maybe targeted attacks on key military targets, or demonstrations of strength or public information campaigns to dissuade Marleyans and other people from wanting to go to war against them.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 48 Responses

Thanks again to everyone who participated! We’ll see you again next episode!

#snk poll #snk polls #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #snk #aot #snk spoilers #snk s4

8 notes · View notes

jawnkeets · 4 years

Note

just saw that you love rilke's letters to a young poet as well! it's one of my favorite reads when i need a pick-me-up or motivation. but i wonder whether you agree with him when he says "works of art are infinitely solitary and nothing is less likely to reach them than criticism. only love can grasp them and hold them and do them justice"? xx

it is beautiful!! 💕

funnily enough this has been driving me nuts this entire year to the point where it has become almost academically central, especially during term time when i’m writing weekly essays and reading loads of crit. this is just my two cents, and i’m only just beginning to attempt to put my thoughts in order, which will be obvious, so pls no one hold me to this lol. this is also specifically about literature, though i’d love to hear people’s thoughts concerning other arts!

anyway, this started when i was working on george herbert, whose poetry is just stunning, but it’s so easy to push his ideas until they fall apart or contradict each other, and many critics have done so. however erudite and academically interesting this work was, though, i couldn’t shake the idea that it was entirely missing the point, and i couldn’t get a quotation by monet out of my head: ‘everyone discusses my art as if it were necessary to understand, when it is simply necessary to love’.* critics try to unravel the thread of herbert’s poetry, herbert pulls at their critical thread in turn. i’d read secondary criticism when trying to work out what to say about him, then come back to herbert and realise i had nothing to say at all which truly added to his poetry, or to use rilke’s words, did it justice.

and so from then on i often felt like i was writing to say something that seemed clever, or being original for originality’s sake (because i didn’t want to fall into certain critical grooves), or saying what everyone else had already said (and if it was bang on why not just read the poetry itself?!), and returning to the poetry would always make me feel so silly, though in a gentle, humbling way. rilke says as much: ‘it [criticism] will either be partisan views, fossilised and made meaningless in its lifeless rigidity, or it will be neat wordplay, where one opinion will triumph one day and the opposite the next.’ this was partly, practically, because i didn’t have time to discover what i ‘truly thought’ - when you’re reading the primary stuff, secondary stuff, and writing the essay in two or three days you often have to pick an idea somewhat arbitrarily and run with it. but it’s also embarrassing to say what you actually feel about a work of literature, even if it is possible within a critical framework (which i’ll come back to); if a tutor didn’t like something i’d written when i didn’t care for the opinion myself, no big deal, back to the drawing board. if it had been what i really thought about an author i revered, it would be hideous. sharing love with someone else makes you vulnerable, as in any other area of life.

but, to use the rilke quote, how can you ‘do them justice’ if not by criticism, and by criticism truly meant, if there is such a thing? by writing creatively yourself? by reading, absorbing and sharing with other people? passion/ effusion rather than ‘rigid’ academic analysis (i.e. old-school romantic 'criticism’, like lamb’s thoughts on hogarth)? this is kind of the problem with english literature as a discipline. i’m no expert on its development, but when i’m in a cynical mood i think it’s because to study english literature (i.e. for it to be institutionalised and taken seriously as an academic discipline, for us to ‘do’ it at all as anything other than recreation) it needs to have grounds for legitimacy, by which i mean that it needs to have scholarly method, quantifiable elements, be teachable, etc. unlike classics which arguably the institutional study of english (or substitute any vernacular) literature rose out of in european education, there’s no immediately obvious linguistic rigour (as in, fluency in another language or languages isn’t a primary focus of the discipline**), so we also need, if not english language as a module or core part of the course, which some courses do have, a focus on language and its constituent parts, or close-reading (the verb does this, the parallel structure does that, etc). but, less cynically, i think it also emerged because we felt there’s something to say about vernacular literature, and we wanted to try and do that. but the paradox is that whatever that is can’t really be said. hence the increasingly complicated 20th century stuff culminating in deconstruction, and now in the 21st century what is often a focus on manageable specifics - pathways through texts (like ‘wind in shakespeare’), spotlighting something in the historical moment and reading it in conjunction with the text (the laryngoscope really helps us read george eliot because...), etc.*** i should say that i do find this stuff really interesting, i just struggle to reconcile it with the feeling i get when i read and am spellbound by what i read, and what is so fundamental to reading for me - the ambiguity, the innumerable elements comprising the text that cannot be separated or delineated without the magic fading,**** the wholeness or completeness, the feeling of comprehending many if not all elements of the text at once.

i do think, as well, that reading and practicing critical writing has helped me to appreciate literature more. partly because it’s helped me realise what i don’t think literature is ‘about’, if there is such a thing, but also in terms of positive definition as well as negative, because rigour, deep thinking, attention to detail, extended and focused meditation on a single text/ idea/ theme/ topic/ word, etc are skills which are enriching. it’s a strange thing where i feel like i’m moving closer at the same time as i’m moving further away.

so basically, as the year’s progressed, i’ve been impetuously trying to fight criticism through the medium of criticism, which has its obvious ironies and shortcomings. i wrote an essay, for example, arguing that keats’ poetry is anti-taxonomical, and that criticism, conversely, is taxonomical - it’s from κρίνειν, to judge or decide, so to be a critic is to choose/ select/ interpret/ delineate - criticism of keats, then, is best when it’s as unlike criticism as possible (and so bad criticism), because otherwise it’s deliberately misunderstanding keats. i’m being as honest as i can be, and at times as embarrassing and embarrassed as i can be, and it’s working much better. but i think after all this that the best criticism, to be as generous to other critics as they really deserve (as i have not been all year, to my discredit), is passionate, and that critics show this in different ways.***** one way around my crisis is to take the view that literature reconciles work and play, and criticism does or at least should do the same, thus running parallel with the text instead of converging (because in ‘playing’ it will naturally be somewhat divergent). i buy this to a degree. and also some people do study literature on the grounds for which i’ve criticised criticism above (they love specifics, or creative pathways through texts, etc), and i don’t want to set myself against them at all; i’ve realised that i am also partly one of these people - some hugely inspiring tutors have shown me that it is amazing to study in this way, and i’ve seen from the work of tutors and fellow students that love can be suffused through criticism like this, that it can be genuinely moving and inspiring. i also get that this perhaps doesn’t feel like a binary split in other places or for other people as it does for me; i think creative writing for example is way bigger in america as a subject, so it might not feel like ‘enjoy literature and write literature recreationally’ and ‘do literature academically/ in an academic setting’ are diametrically opposed, or that you can do both but that they have to be separate, or that there’s a disconnect between the way you do one and the way you do the other. so now i’m trying to be as honest as i can be when it comes to criticism, and pushing forward whilst trying not to cover or lose sight of the little spark reading generates - i think that if your criticism bears this in mind, it might not be able to grasp the poetry like simply loving it does, but it can perhaps reach out and gingerly touch it. whether that makes it worth it is up to you.

i hope this answers your question - i realise this got long. what an interesting ask, thanks very much for sending it!! 🌹

* speaking of - i recommend this poem!!

** though some courses, like the oxford one, teach old english, which is arguably another language.

*** i appreciate that what rilke means by criticism is not necessarily identical to what i mean by criticism, which obviously developed a lot after rilke, but even so.

**** granted, in engineering a car is and should be taken apart so we can see how it works, but the end goal is still the working car!!

***** some would disagree, saying that we should be ‘objective’ and/ or shouldn’t be ‘on a poet’s side’ (i.e. trying to do them justice) and i struggle with them a lot more, but after a bit of grumbling they still have my firm respect.

#asks

26 notes · View notes

piratadelamor · 4 years

Text

ok so, i just analyzed kageyama's birth chart!

i made this out of pure entertainment, boredom and curiosity and i don't actually believe that astrology works on fictional characters (i even have my doubts that astrology defines one person's personality since i'm inclined to traditional astrology, but anyway, this is only for fun purposes aand it's very superficial and not supposed to be taken seriously as an astrology work!!) i'm also not the type of fan who knows every single detail about a character or who remembers every single appearances and lines so i probably won't go too deep into examples...

kageyama's official birth date is 22/12/1996 and he's from miyagi, okinawa. with this information only we can already identify most of his chart: he's a capricorn sun, capricorn mercury, sagittarius venus, virgo mars, capricorn jupiter and aries saturn (i dont use neptune, uranus or pluto). being born on that day, he could either be a taurus or a gemini moon, and, of course, there's no information about the time he was born, so his ascendant is also a guess. i tried to find a solution based on the chart as a whole, and i think it makes a lot of sense!!

first thing i wanted to look for was a placement that talked about his sport skills. being sports a matter of the 5th house, it seemed clear to me that that's where his sun should be placed. the sun represents life. in one's chart, it talks about our ego, our conscious identity, and it's placement tells us where we shine, where we direct our creative life force. for mundane astrology the sun represents the authority of the state, the government - presidents, nobles, and kings. kageyama is called "the king of the court". to me there's no doubt that his sun should be at the 5th house - where he rules, where his light shines brighter, where his will to live is directed.

if so, considering the whole signs house system, we get a virgo ascendant (house I), and so on: libra (II), scorpio (III), sagittarius (IV), capricorn (V), aquarius (VI), pisces (VII), aries (VIII), taurus (IX), gemini (X), cancer (XI) and leo (XII).

it was also very convincing to me that this would also place his mars on the ascendant (virgo). being the 1st house the part of the chart that talks about our physical body, and mars talking about a person's vitality, people with mars on the ascendant or even opposite to it (VII) usually tend to push their physical body to its limit, being pretty driven to physical activities (we can clearly see that on the way kageyama and hinata always stay until very late practicing at the club, for example... kageyama’s often seen running on his free time too). it would also make a lot of sense considering his appearence (both physical and the impression he gives off) and the way he acts. mars is the planet of war. it is violence, action. people with mars on the ascendant can easily give off an intimidating appearence or presence. being a capricorn on top of that, there's no escape: that's the famous resting bitch face..... he's energetic, straightforward, competitive and independent. and that also explains the way he can become pretty agressive sometimes, mostly regarding his competitiveness and his desire to be on top. i also found it funny that while i was looking up for kageyama's birth date i came across a few descriptions of him talking about his "sharp glare", and sharp objects are also a matter of mars. about the placement on virgo, the ascendant also talks about how perfectionist he is, including his appearence (he's always filing his nails, for example, and he's never negligent about his health. actually he takes it very seriously), and mars in this sign, besides the already mentioned perfectionism, is also about being very goal-oriented and critical. it's also interesting, if we play a little with words, that virgo's symbology talks a lot about serving, and kageyama's position as a setter is about "serving" the best tosses to his teammates, besides being his serve one of his strongest weapons.

on 22/12/1996, there were 2 times when the ascendant was in virgo: around midnight and around 10pm - 11pm. but the problem is, around midnight his moon would be taurus; around 10pm his moon would be gemini. once again, the placement of the moon made my mind. for a taurus moon, it'd be placed on the 9th house. a gemini would be placed on the 10th. i'd go for a gemini moon. you could doubt that, knowing that kageyama isn't very good with words, and having a virgo ascendant, which is ruled by mercury, the planet of communication and also the ruler of gemini, could be a little off. but it's not true that all geminis are talkative and sociable like that (specially because there's not a single placement in a chart that can speak alone for a person's personality). i believe the moon in gemini fits the way kageyama mentally deals with what he loves. he keeps a fucking volleyball journal!!! and while he's playing, he's always thinking and observing every minimal detail. his mental work is impressive. no wonder he's a genius. he might not have the best way with words (and this is about the way he's not good at dealing with emotions, which a gemini moon really might not be) but he can read his teammates very well and adapt to them perfectly. this is all gemini. speaking of mercury, a mercury in capricorn isn't very good at being sensitive with words either. they also have an authoritarian way of speaking and can be quite judgemental and impatient (specially if someone doesn't get something obvious to them). with mars in virgo, moon in gemini and mercury in capricorn, i guess we get a pretty close picture on kageyama's temper and communication skills.

i thought a lot about it's placement on the 10th house as well. the 10th house, being the highest spot of one's chart, is not only the house of career and success, but of our public image too. a moon in the 10th talks about an emotional need for public recognition and an emotional energy directed to the career. this is a very important placement for him, being his moon not only in the 10th but also conjunct midheaven, which means, literally at the highest spot of his birth chart. kageyama knows he's good and he wants to be the best at what he loves the most. he wants to be on top. and that's what he's passionate about. the moon also talks about our early childhood, which is when tobio's passion for volleyball began: the events of his childhood defined the path of life he chose to follow. but he also learns that that's not something he'd conquer alone. and it makes so much sense to be gemini. after all, gemini's symbol is the twins. not even the moon shines by herself alone. considering how kageyama learned this lesson, it seems like such a beautiful placement for his chart. that's something he had to understand in order to grow and get better and reach the position he achieved.

about his venus, the planet of love and relationships, in sagittarius, it brought me to his relationship with hinata (speaking as friends/teammates/rivals/whatever you want tbh). when venus is in sagittarius, a relationship is a place to experiment and grow. sagittarius is ruled by jupiter, the planet of expansion. a sagittarius venus will want you to take them beyond, to expand their horizons. that's exactly what hinata did to kageyama since the very beginning. "when you get stronger, you will definitely meet someone even better". hinata's always pushing kageyama beyond and that's why they get so connected to each other. hinata always surprises him, their relationship/partnership is never dull, but exciting, impredictable. it's fire burning.

i'm not going too deep into analyzing jupiter and saturn, and i'm not very good at analyzing aspects, but since kageyama's such a capricorn (sun, mercury and jupiter - like me! heheh) there was no way i could look away from his saturn in aries: after all, saturn rules capricorn, and his saturn squares his sun (a hard aspect). (btw, i found out that the kanji for “kageyama” means “shadowed mountain”, which is SUCH a saturnine name?? both shadows and mountains can be related to this planet) doing a little research, i found some interesting things about this placement. about saturn in aries: "Stifling your normal and healthy, more aggressive, competitive, or self-centered qualities can be detrimental to you, possibly causing headaches. You don’t like showing weakness. (...) You fear your own feelings of inadequacy. (...) You need to be careful not to limit yourself too much due to fear of failure or fear of making a poor decision. (...) You are highly resourceful. Your ability to start fresh helps you achieve your goals". like... that was really on point i guess. i think we could relate this to his development, as he began to adapt to the karasuno spikers due to a fear of repeating what happened during middle school. saturn is the planet that talks about fears and limits, and when it squares his sun, his position of "king of the court", this is what happens: he feels limited on the way he plays, on his true nature. and by limiting that, by denying his true nature, he was limiting his space to grow. there's a really good post i came across very recently on this matter, so i'm leaving this here.

i believe this aspect would be crucial to understanding his position as the "king". saturn in aries is the dispositor of his sun in capricorn. that means, the way his sun in capricorn "behaves" is modified by his position of saturn. aries is a self-centered, hot-tempered sign with needs of control, and that defines the type of role his sun plays as the "king". of course, this relates to an especific episode of kageyama's life, but it's a crucial episode, a truly turning point of his life - like most saturn related events. to add one more detail, the sun rules his 12th house (leo), and one of the 12th house's themes is isolation - what kageyama got in middle school by acting like a "dictator king" and what he feared the most that would happen again.

#IM SORRY ABOUT THE LONG POST!!!!!!!!!#and about my english i guess.........#hq!!#kageyama tobio #bea talks

5 notes · View notes

fantroll-purgatory · 4 years

Text

@itoshiki

hello! im submitting my sort-of-trollsona-but-not-really. I made him I guess more Alternian and he’s highly personal 2 me but that shouldn’t discourage you! I’m stuck at some parts because I just recently got back into homestuck and I’d like advice from someone who knows their stuff. IT’S SO LONG IM SO SORRY… Thank you so much if you do review it tho!

Hey no worries. Thanks for your patience!

Hell yeah hell yeah ceruleanbloods with Eye Stuff.

World: Alternia, maybe an AU? I’m unsure. But he’s Alternian.

Name: Sancti Serpus

“Sancti” comes from “Saint” and his belief that he can do no wrong, as well as how he believes that his experiments benefit troll society. “Serpus” comes from “Serpent” and his personality being sly and manipulative, could be described as a snake by others in the way he is first nice to his friends but backstabs them later, as well as his lusus being a two-headed Titanoboa (prehistoric Boa).

I understand the reasoning behind the first name! If you want something that plays a little more into the archetypal Mad Scientist “I will become a GOD AHAHAHAHA” vibe then I suggest Apoteu from the Greek apotheoun, meaning “to make a god of.” Still fits his beliefs about himself and how he benefits society…but there is such a thing a vengeful, malevolent god.

I like the serpent theme, especially given the Rod of Asclepius/Caduceus confusion, given that the former is about medicine and the latter about commerce. Plus snake oil salesman as duplicitous people claiming they have a cure when they’re really just selling you whatever they could dig up. Serpus is a little too obvious as a snake troll though, so maybe we abstract that a bit. A slightly silly one would be Davdav, since the longest-living two-headed snake is named Double Dave after its discoverer.

Apoteu Davdav. It has the opposite of a nice ring to it, but I like it because it sounds kind of mad sciencey.

Age: 7.5 Sweeps (16 Human Years)

Theme/Story: His theme is sort of Mad Scientist vibes. He dabbles in forensic pathology, chemistry (even though he often explodes things), troll biology/genes and psychology. Those are his main 5 branches because he’s not very good at math so his knowledge of physics is limited.

fugidghiuuaehiu Bad At Math Science Gang RISE UP

He was hatched and went through The Brooding Caverns. He decided to settle on a Hive in the outskirts of a city, in a suburban area with only a few highblooded neighbors. However, his lusus was very, very hard to feed for the two heads would often argue with and attack each other. His lusus would feed on anyone who visited or came too close, by asphyxiating them. It also neglected him and didn’t pay attention to him for it was too busy fighting with itself. He eventually learned to sedate his lusus through aromatherapy, with chemicals he himself created in his lab. He lives on a huge castle-like hive near a forest where he gets the material for his experiments and corpses to analyze. He has a bunch of body parts in flasks and bottles.

He is a very strange troll, but he doesn’t want to be. Due to his upbringing and his lusus eating whoever came over. He often saw culling, death and destruction near him, which caused him to have a morbid fixation on death and a desire to better troll society through science, influenced by his ancestor Discordi Discipla (he’s a WIP). However, he has fallen victim to his own mental deterioration and apathy as he spent more time around the dead (and undead). This mental deterioration was exacerbated when a presumed dead corpse came to life in his lab and attacked him, causing him blindness in his right eye. He’s somewhat afraid of being culled for his blindness, but knows that it’s not likely, due to his highblood status.

This is pretty good and comprehensive!

Due to his childhood where he didn’t have control over what his lusus did, he now wants to have control over everything in his life. This makes him a very controlling and manipulative person, bent on doing anything to get his way even if it means experimenting on his lowblooded friends. He doesn’t necessarily like hurting others and doesn’t mean to, Alternian society and his own visions of violence has just made him apathetic. This apathy as well as his low self-worth stemming from his neglect has made him have tons of unhealthy relationships, as well as has made him a perfectionist and narcissist. Despite his supposed belief that the end justifies the means and he’s going to make troll society better, he doubts himself and has an inferiority complex.

His mental deterioration has made him a very unstable troll to be around. He’s still a good troll at heart, however the odds are in disfavor due to his blood color causing him to look down on others lower on the hemospectrum and his own childhood. He does things mainly on impulse and suffers from strange hallucinations and visions of the future ever since he was blinded on his right eye. He’s learned to cope with them and they don’t necessarily harm him, but they do cause him significant distress.

He also has a lot of scars from laboratory incidents, and his neighbors hate him.

fjiodshfuo yeah if my neighbor kept making ungodly noises and murdering people with abandon I may also have a beef with them.

Review Goals: General Overview please! Strife Specibus:

Chemicalkind. He carries around various noxious chemicals to use as he pleases, but sometimes they irritate his eyes when he uses them. He can handle it almost all of the time though. He throws them in bottles and that’s how he fights.

I know I *just* suggested this for my most recent review but bottlekind fits here too because if he runs out of chemicals he can just break a bottle off on a nearby surface and stab someone with the broken glass it’s fun it’s easy it’s free.

Fetch Modus: I kind of took the idea from a mspa fetch modus entry, since I’m bad at coming up with fetch moduses. It’s unoriginal I know, but I genuinely couldn’t think of anything.

Periodic Table Modus.

It requires Sancti to remember his elements, as he needs to remember them for when he’s working and therefore it helps him but also inconveniences him as he can forget them.

This is how it works:

When an item is captchalogued, a quick calculation is checked to see the size of that item. If it is lower than 190x190, the size of the item is totalled and placed on a slot on the fetch modus that corresponds to the periodic table number.

For example, an item that is 4 in by 2 in would total to 6, and be in the position of Carbon on the table.

Sancti would then have to open the periodic table modus, which would open as an actual metaphysical table, and retrieve the item.

It is blank, with 118 spaces.

This fetch modus is a little confusing to me as well, and your poor math challenged troll likely also finds it difficult.

…but I think I have an idea that keeps with the spirit *and* the confusion while generating some good old Modus Shenanigans. What about an ORBITAL MODUS, with items filling in in each new category as an electron shell would? All items in the outermost shell would be immediately accessible, with deeply nested items remaining inaccessible until the outer shells were emptied.

Like this. Which is perfect for your chemist troll.

Blood Color: Ceruleanblood/Cobaltblood.

Lunar Sway: Derse, because he is dissatisfied with himself.

Derse and Prospit assignations don’t necessarily have to do with how one feelings about *themselves!* Karkat is Prospit and Nepeta is Derse, which reflects the fact that Karkat has accepted the hemospectrum as the way things have to be despite the horrors it inflicts on him, while Nepeta is extremely happy to be herself, but constantly snipes Equius for kowtowing to the hemospectrum. Even Equius is a Dersite, since he doesn’t agree with the hemospectrum so much as develop a really disturbing fixation over the following and subversion of it.

Given that your troll actively uses the hemospectrum to his advantage and delights in doing so, I’d argue he’s a Prospitan! Title: I’m unsure if I want to make them a sylph of light or a sylph of space, I’m actually not sure at all what they should be.

Between forensic pathology and genetics and chemistry and being attacked by a zombie and feeling he knows best he’s actually coming off VERY much as a Life player to me. Since you’re bouncing between two Sylph classpects I’m happy to keep that title as long as we acknowledge he’s not currently very good at it :P.

Symbol and Meaning: The symbol for purification by burning. He’s my first troll in the session I want to make. It kind of has the meaning of spiritual cleansing or purifying something that is not pure. In this case I think it relates to Sancti’s personal growth that will happen through the session, reflecting how he has to better himself through painful events.

If we go by the EZ, his sign would be Scorsci, Sign of the Fixer. Which is certainly what he sees himself as! I’ll see if I can play with the symbol you gave him and incorporate the Scorpio M into it.

Handle: gravesideAnopsia

Anopsia is a defect in the visual field or blindness, and graveside refers to how he got his blindness.

We definitely see trolls with retroactively foreshadowy trolltags, but I can’t think of a reason for him to have picked Anopsia before his blinding. What about gravesideConjunct, since he sees himself as the connective tissue between the dead and the living? Which can become retroactively ironic when his eye putrifies after it comes into contact with necrotic tissue, which is basically an extreme version of conjunctivitis.

Quirk: ~~( he types…. zzz….. taking… his time…. with words… and….types in caps when he…..wants to zzz…. ASSERT HIS POINT….)~~

Love this quirk he’s a sleeby boy.

He either keysmashes to laugh as “eoeoeoe” “sksksks” or simply laughs like “haha” or “hehe”. He also uses the following emoji :)-< and (－‸ლ)

Special Abilities: None, unless you count his visions of the future. But he wasn’t born with psychic abilities.

Idk that he even needs visions of the future tbh. Injury does not always confer abilities in troll society.

Lusus/Guardian: A 2-headed Titanoboa (think of a huuuuuge prehistoric Boa, even bigger than an Anaconda). He considers himself to have two dads as the two heads have separate brains. He calls them “my snake dads”. Him and his lusus have a better relationship now that his lusus is sedated, and he often cuddles with his lusus in between their two heads and feeds them the corpses after he’s done analyzing them. However, their relationship used to be negative and neglectful, as explained above.

Omg yes I love his dads.

Interests: Apart from the sciences listed on his theme, he also enjoys the arts and painting with blood of the corpses he studies, as well as making artistic murals outside to the annoyance of his neighbors. He likes cosmic horror books, doomsday devices and machinery, bodily modification, philosophers, and in his spare game he will play puzzle and roleplaying games (but not FLARPing, he’s bad at it). He thinks about hunting the undead sometimes, and likes horror movies, making friends regardless of their dead or alive status, scaring his neighbors, horror movies, and mindless antics.

Appearance: His hair is very straight, but it tends to get messy. Also the string on one of his horns is a string that got stuck on his horn and it’s hard to remove now.

usghiuserg good. I’m gonna see what I can do to his sprite to convey the “straight but messy” vibe more.

Personality:

He’s VERY creative, more than analytical, which is an oddity for a scientist, others may think of him as a “creative genius” but he rejects the title of being a mad scientist. He wants to be positively known. He also always tries to finish things and has a general curious personality. He’s always seeking knowledge, and often tires himself out from working too much on his experiments, which causes him to enter a cycle of all nighters vs heavy sleeping. He’s a very heavy sleeper, often taking naps throughout the day. He procrastinates on mundane tasks that don’t relate to his interests or experiments. However, he drinks a lot of caffeinated beverages when he needs to work in order to keep himself awake essentially starting an all nighter cycle.

Depending on the circumstances, he can be very friendly and charming, or quite the opposite. It all depends. He likes to crack morbid jokes that make nobody laugh, and is quite disorganized as well as silly. He cares for his moirail (wip) and matesprit (wip) the most, and even though he sometimes snaps at them, he never wants to lose them.

Land: Land of Dreams and Angels, but depending on the classpect you assign him I will change it.

*Hopes and Dreams plays in the background*

What if he’s Land of Regrowth and Thaw, with the grass being fed by the remains of former consorts and the rest slowly unfreezing from ice as his journey continues? Works with his work with dead bodies and also gives us the vegetation associated with Life.

I also have his introduction written out but idk if I should include it. Here it is:

Your name is SANCTI SERPUS and you’d rather be sleeping, or dead.

You love everything relating to THE SCIENCES, but you are not very good at MATH, or keeping organized. However, you are still considered a “CREATIVE GENIUS”. You love anything that STIMULATES YOUR GRUBBY BRAIN - such as PSYCHOLOGY, FORENSICS and TROLL BIOLOGY. You do many EXPERIMENTS, most of which involve using troll parts in jars, to create true ABOMINATIONS; and one which sadly took your right eye’s vision and has had you in fear of being CULLED. However, you reject the idea of being a “MAD SCIENTIST”.

In a weird fashion, you also highly enjoy THE ARTS, and paint the walls of your GINORMOUS HIVE and other places with objectively “pretty good” PICTURES made from the BLOOD of the corpses you work with, to the annoyance of your neighbors. You also have a slight interest in BODILY MODIFICATION, in an effort to withdraw attention from your accident, as well as an interest in COSMIC HORROR BOOKS, as any good scientist should have. Another interest of yours is VIDEO GAMES, especially ROLE PLAYING and PUZZLE games, and when you’re not working, you spend your time playing them. You’ve even attempted to CODE your own game, and FAILED. However, you are not a very good FLARPER.

Despite this, all your work leaves you tired, which means you are a HEAVY SLEEPER and tend to procrastinate even the most MUNDANE TASKS that are not related to your interests. On the days that you are energized from drinking CAFFEINATED BEVERAGES, you like to go outside at night and collect all sorts of RANDOM KNICK-KNACKS, which may include CORPSES and FOSSILS to analyze. This has attracted the attention of your neighbors and BEST FRIENDS, who call you an UNHINGED TOTAL MANIAC. You don’t understand why, until you take off your lab coat to reveal an alarming amount of new scars from LABORATORY INCIDENTS. You really are kind of an ODDBALL.

This is such a frickin MOOD. Let’s go to the redesign, though I don’t have much!

Horns - you said he got string tangled in his horns but those horns are shaped in a way that makes it pretty easy to untangle stuff! I gave him horns that are Klein-bottle inspired, though it’s obviously impossible for horns to actually grow into a Klein bottle shape. Now THAT’S a mess I wouldn’t wanna tangle with!

Hair - I absolutely ripped a fan-troll template to shreds and put it back together again for this hair, but I think this conveys “basically straight but mussed up” with a little more shape than the original.

Face - I adjusted the proportions and replaced the eyebrows with just the piercings because it was looking a little busy.

Shirt - Again it looked a little busy with the jacket with symbols on both flaps and the pendant in the middle, so I gave him a mad scientist jacket edited from John’s.

Symbol - I tried to find a happy medium between the radial symmetry of the original symbol and the Scorsci M with the arrows.

That’s pretty much it! Hope this helped!

-TR

#ceruleanblood #cobaltblood #submission #itoshiki #review #tr review #sancti #serpus #sancti serpus #apoteu #davdav #apoteu davdav #redesign

13 notes · View notes

art-now-germany · 4 years

Photo

Improvisation Abstract in Modern Art !-Original...., Igor Bajenov

What is art? .... "I am art." Definition of art: Art takes on complex relationships in all areas of life, and more creative perspective answers the spirit of Indiviudalität match in itself and draws from the collective Gedächntis and understanding of the world. Art is thus the only acceptable form of conflict develop culture and politics real and visionary. Art is communication between Mind and me ... me and my work ... my work and the next reason ... Art is thus an entertaining evolierende chain reaction. Perhaps Art Evolution? Art = The past, present and (or) future in their wide range of colors, shapes and sounds to show. For me, art is a form of expression of thoughts, feelings, emotions, but, unfortunately, often by commercial interests. You may be wondering now, what I mean. So I explain it to you. An artist per se, every human being is of creating something that he thinks is art. Whether it was written, painted, sculpted, forged, declaimed or otherwise prepared. The important thing is that there is, therefore, the work that needs to come out from the inside of the creator and that it precisely the man who created it, considers art. Because True art can not be obtained on head pressure or with an order one. Art is about the Muse. Yes I know that word is prejudiced, one connects it with ancient myths or just one or a lover, or the places the artist in a state feely. But, just that it is not, is not it. The Muse is a kind of phenomenon, rather a feeling that you wanted to give a figure in ancient times. A muse is a burgeoning idea, an association or even a clue to something that you will create. In any case, the true artist, and thus the true art has this to do something as the origin, which inspires from within something. But now the company set up an ad hoc basis have created something comes want. Of course, it must be great, stunning, new and convincing. Simply put, something gigantic that all ideas met, if not exceeds. And here starts the second part of my statement. For now I ask you, if as I just said, art comes with a Muse. How can they then with a contract, no matter by whom issued, be created? The artist who is perhaps known for his works from his musical creative phases, is now to create something on command and although it is possible and often even artistic nature. But it is a work to order. If you ask me, write me a poem or write me a story, because you had the pleasure to read one of my works and I liked you. So I tell you simply "NO" because I do not live it. But the one who has chosen the art as bread and life merit. Must say "YES" and it is also. See also commercialism "creates" art, but whether this works really should bear the title of art or rather commissioned art or just work? In my opinion, they should be demoted because they reduce the art in its value. I'm not talking about artistic taste, because even though I like better than a Monet a Beuys, so I have to both recognize as art, as they both emerged from such an idea. Art is self-realization, art has only the feelings of the artist is no longer expressed, and no less, is not about beauty !! For me, art is a form of communication. That is, the artist expresses not only his feelings, but wants the people with his work say something. He / she does not spontaneously and unwrought but processed so that it is understandable and enjoyable for the reader / viewer / listener. But sometimes even the incomprehensible pleasant or the unpleasant is meaningful. This art is a dialogue and not a monologue, I think it's also important that the artist has contact with his audience and the feedback takes care about what is normal for live performances, for writers or visual artists but should be. "Art is an expression of their own culture" Art for me is a kind of self-realization and liberation. Maybe even a little criticism. If you can do something that few can. - Everything is art - Survival is -life Art is art - Art is dying - Laughter is art - is not to laugh Art - Whining at a high level is Art .- Not whining is Art - Doing nothing is art - Art is thinking - Non-think is art - Everything is art so art is nothing other than art. Geez. Art is free figures from free spirit Art is a zweckfüßiger Sunrise in sausage glow of its own frequent lightness. Waiting a herausgepurzelten cheese princess on the verge of a frog loose Vaginalbrunnens. As the name of the site says it all: "Everything is art" The way of individual lives, loves, suffers and works. Then, when someone else may well something special, can he used his art to others to enjoy it. Art transforms people through images, archetypes and Symole. Art touches feelings and emotions. Art awakens to new life. Love Art curious joy, here is my proposal for the characterization of the concept of art. Art is the art with the help of a medium, for example, (music, painting or even mathematics) to develop a language all its own. The use of these media is only once "only" a craft. In conjunction with an idea and creativity arises from art, but can not be shared must be shared. "What is art" This briefly worded question is deceptively simple. Anyone who jumps up in his mind to do here made known, should know that it enters one of the oldest areas of employment of mankind. And seen do this from the perspective of those who art or take claim for themselves than buy from the perspective of whose who like art to be such, and some of their "understanding" and last but from the perspective of those who , judge the art or rather the art critics. The description of what is art, therefore highly dependent on the angle of view of the art actors. So art is for the artist or the artist certainly a form of expression for feelings, observations and findings. To convey a message where / her importance to him. How high is the acceptance of his / her work of art, is probably secondary. Here the enthusiasts want the discussion to the "true", respectively the "not-true" artist probably connect, this is here, however, inevitable. For the art viewer contrast, our own perception is crucial. The must not be congruent with the embassies of the artist / the artist. Well made possible by the artist intended message is hidden and yet he feels / she addressed herself. He / she buys a piece of art and presents / suspended / installed it in the habitat or visited an idea and takes the seen and heard with. Here interested feelings, observations and findings of the receiver. Seen one can understand art as a form of communication that makes visible Contemporary and contemporaries in a special way and consolidated. Whether see future generations yet to be connected to these messages, is debatable. Modern productions of Shakespeare, Schiller and many other throw such discussions again and again. Interpretations of paintings or sculptures can vary widely. And yet the art manages the employment of people with himself and his environment Oscar Wilde is certainly correct when he says: "Art is the strongest form of individualism, which knows the world". But it is without doubt the individualism with the largest collective benefit, I mean. Art does not rely on evidence and free. Your freedom is the perfect fulfillment of the self-determined shape. Their quality is determined only by itself. The created is absolutely and belongs to humanity. Art is a way to escape from reality for me. "Art, I am."...New Photo- Design Collection in Fine Art - Digital Photo Mix in New Photo Technic - Abstract/Expressionism - Figurative/Decorative in Fine Art.

https://www.saatchiart.com/art/Photography-Improvisation-Abstract-in-Modern-Art-Original/462428/2607014/view

#conceptual #abstractexpressionism #figurative #IgorBajenov #artdeco #fineart

1 note · View note

gg-astrology · 5 years

Note

HI angel so um i have a weird observation and i would like to read your thoughts on it i saw how ones in an early bts video jimin said jhope brings the motherly side in people and when he crys everyone gets emotional and crys too, him beng a taurusmoon like me (altho im a diffrent sun and so on) ive actually discovered that im hella emotional but i try not to cry infront of people because they legit panic like why do taurus moons have dis efect on people? :D love ya be safe⛈️

im the taurus moon i wanted to just explane i know that every person is kind to a cryng one BUT when it comes to taurus moon i have seen that people feel uneasy and like everyone gets worried as if a kid has been injured but for lets say a cap moon or aries moon they just tap them on the shoulder say a joke and say oh come on cheer up like fo real when it comes to taurus placements i feel like people just go in to a panic mode and i dont understand why do people see us as weak? (2/2)

Hey there! 💕💖❤️ Oh what a cute ask, about the weak thing I don’t think people see us as weak, but it’s because we don’t allow ourselves to be vulnerable (about ourselves, in front of others) — that people don’t know what to do and act accordingly. The examples you’ve given, if it seems to work best/help the person in the way that they needed then most people would do what was communicated/perceive as wants of those who need it.

If they have no knowledge of what to do to help, them it’s up to us to actually tell them/communicate what we want. If not, they’ll implement what they know of themselves/others and that’s not — one size does not fit all, despite it seeming to ‘cover’ enough (it’s not ideal, do better)

It’s not them who perceives us as weak it’s ourselves + thus the way we ask for help is also dependent on our ability to not perceive our emotional vulnerability in front of others as a weakness as well. Which is hard to do, but do able! In order to communicate that forward and receive the treatment that will benefit us more than deciding to just shut it down again. And no, simply asking people to look away is not dealing with the problem for us. We’re Venusian, we can do well if we end up trusting others/giving them the real opportunity/chance. Which is something we unfortunately do not do enough when the time actually comes/counts for something.

As for hobi, yeah I think it’s part of this as well. But also consider how he has sun conjunct Saturn conjunct Pisces Mercury and Venus - someone who can read space and expresses understanding of situations/others (when it counts). What is needed, what should be done. If you meet someone who usually has a good lid/limit on things, propriety and usually puts others first in order to handle things/make the best out of a situation/what to do. Someone who’s active in handling situations and often times does it because they can, and can protect/help others who aren’t as skilled or quick on the uptake to this as well.

If you meet someone who is willing to work hard, puts others to safety first or stays behind to make sure everyone/everything is alright. Someone like this who usually shows the side of competence/best side of themselves as reliable and secure. When they show another side of themselves, the side that cries, it’s moving to a lot of people because they’ve been there through the challenges, the thick and thin and knows of the objective difficulties they faced together. But personal difficulties, subjective ones such as what we think about ourselves or what we’re individually going through at the time, those are all different.

You can share the same experience as those you’ve faced difficulties with, but your feelings and the depth of what you feel, your thoughts and how you handle things or what you think of at the time (I.e. what motivates you) those solutions to the problem (common factor) you all faced are very different.

He does have a Sun and Saturn square moon, most likely you might get a person who often times put themselves and their feelings behind their duties or what’s perceived to be immediate obligations/to do. The world runs on with or without you and often times the personal adapts as you passively take in experience, it’s only when confronted with your own focus on personal development/progress that you can realize you may need to put yourself first sometimes, in order to build a more stable base for security

Part of why the idea of motherly may come to mind might just be because of this — placing self in front of others, handling situation proactively/spearheading certain ventures in order to bring up collaborative and communicative efforts within the team. It’s not all there is to it, and I don’t think they meant it in a way that implies he doesn’t care for himself (he does), I think everyone has a Ceres, and the way they take care or receive care from others are different, hobi has his in Taurus as well (not conjunct to his moon) it may be likely he offers and gives reassurance, support, a stable and comforting presence in others lives as well. So to see him needing comfort himself, it comes with practice of learning what to do + trust for the person to open up and let themselves be taken care of a bit more as well (but again,,, Sun and Saturn square moon,,, crying definitely ‘doesn’t fit his style’,,,)

7 notes · View notes

twdmusicboxmystery · 5 years

Text

TWD 10x01: Lines We Cross - First Thoughts

Today I’m going to talk about the big things that jumped out at me. Tomorrow, I’ll do Details, which will be longer and focus in on the nitty gritty symbolism. Throughout the week, I’m going to try and do posts on the structure of the episode (the headings throughout), the opening credits, and the radiation reference. Wish me luck in getting all these written. But let’s dive right in!

***As always, spoilers for TWD 10x01 abound below! Don’t read until you’ve watched! You’ve been warned.***

Plot Recap:

TF trains on the beach against walkers and shows off their mad skills. It’s obvious that in months since The Storm, they’ve realized the Whisperers are no longer in the area. The kids recover a skin mask, which makes everyone think the Whisperers might be back. Michonne leads a group to look for more signs of the Whisperers’ return, and she finds some. Daryl and Carol hang out together. Meanwhile, back at Alexandria, Eugene, Rosita, Father Gabriel, and Siddiq raise baby Coco with some mild hilarity. People still discriminate against Lydia for being a former Whisperer, but she and Negan seem to be forming an understanding because they’re both outcasts.

Then a Russian satellite falls from the sky, causing a fire where it touches down. TF has to cross Alpha’s arbitrary border to put it out. They decide it’s something they have to do because the fire threatens their homes and food supplies. They work all night together to put out the fire and succeed. In the morning, Eugene wants to harvest parts of the satellite to use in the communities. Daryl takes Carol to where he and Alpha looked out over the walker herd and talked, before the heads on the pikes were discovered. It ends with Alpha herself emerging and looking at Carol, which means she knows they’ve crossed her borders.

Biggest TD Symbols:

In general, there were about a billion dog, ocean/sea, and bird references. I’ll mention a few today, but get into them more in tomorrow’s detail pos. But I felt like not a single minute went by when we didn’t get one of these references, either in things we saw or in dialogue. I had to keep pausing the episode because I had so many things to write down, and that honestly doesn’t happen to me often.

Today, I want to focus a few in particular, because these are the ones that jumped out at me in a big way.

1. The first happened before the episode even began. You know how they always show text on the screen, even before the recap, that says, “This program contains violent content…parental discretion…yada yada?” That text has always been shown against a black or perhaps grey screen. Well, they suddenly decided to put it against a picture of a dog.

The shot I got of it isn’t great. It’s actually a dog looking at an orange lamp shade. It shows a lot of the lamp at first for like half a second and then the black outline covers it. It zooms out a little and we get a piece of the lamp again. I mean…why suddenly put a black and white dog there this season? (Sirius/return symbolism.) I’m telling you, this is our season.

2. The second is one that @frangipanilove pointed out. The scene that includes Daryl, Connie, and Dog. Connie brings Dog to Daryl and holds up a sign that says, “I think you lost something.”

So, dog? Lost? Something Daryl lost that is being returned to him? That’s a super-obvious Sirius/Beth reference. And it involves Connie. Much like last season, she’s being set up as a Beth stand in. Not so much a direct proxy, but we’re seeing Beth callbacks and symbols around her. (Incidentally, I think that’s why tptb pushed the idea of Donnie so hard; they aren’t advocating for these two characters specifically, but rather it’s a clue (albeit very misdirectional) about who Connie represents.)

Let’s consider the scene setup.

Connie was already on the beach working on a net with some others (including Kelly). Then Daryl and Dog show up. Dog runs up to Connie because they’re pals. And Daryl waves at Connie but doesn’t come over. He goes up the beach to the dock where Carol’s boat is about to come in to meet her. Then a few minutes later, Connie walks onto the dock as well, bringing Dog with her and says the thing about him having lost something.

So, think about it this way. Daryl and Dog go their separate ways (just for a few minutes) and then Daryl LITERALLY goes up the road a bit, (as he said to Beth in Alone) and then Connie shows up and returns Dog to him. A very obvious Sirius reference if there ever was one. But I think it’s important that it’s Connie that brings Dog back.

If I were to try and interpret this sequence beyond just being an obvious Beth/Sirius reference, I would say Connie is going to have something to do with returning Beth to Daryl. I have a LOT more to say about how I think this is going to go down. I’ll talk about it later in the week when I do a predictions post based on what we’ve learned from this episode.

3. Luke and Jules’ hot dog conversation. At first, I didn’t know what to make of this, but they focused on it and it’s too random to not mean anything. @frangipanilove helped me figure it out. Obviously a hot dog is a different thing than a dog (Sirius/Dog Star symbolism) but even so, this is a dog reference. I thought the “hot” part might refer to fire (like Beth and Daryl burning down the moonshine shack). But @frangipanilove tells me that Sirius actually means “scorching” or “glowing.” So to call Sirius a “hot” dog star wouldn’t be incorrect.

But this is even better than just that. It takes place around a budding romance *coughs Bethyl* and even has an obvious romantic/sexual angle. So I figure, since Luke is the musician (think Stradivarius from last season) he probably represents Beth in this analogy. Which means Jules would be Daryl. She “found” a bunch of “hot” dogs at sea. See what I mean? To me this is an obvious Bethyl reference and it’s setting up that in this next arc, not only will Beth return to Daryl, but we’ll finally see their romance take place.

4. Callback to the Claimers. You know that part where Daryl and Carol were hunting walkers? Yeah, major callback to the Claimers. To Daryl and Lennie shooting the same rabbit with their two arrows. And then Daryl says to Carol, “You’re supposed to call it.” She says, “you didn’t call it.” And he says, “I don’t want to play with you anymore if you’re going to cheat.” They both laugh, but calling it is just like when the Claimers “claimed” things.

I’m honestly not sure exactly what to make of this yet. The last time we saw the Claimers wasn’t in S4 but in The Red Machete with Legs. So it’s definitely calling back to some things that make me happy, but I’m just not sure how to interpret it yet.

Other things:

I’m not sure entirely what’s up with the Russian satellite, but let me say for now that this is a VERY significant development. Again, I can’t be sure exactly what they’re setting up with this in the plot, but symbolically, it’s huge. I’ll talk about this later in the week in conjunction with the radiation reference. I’ll also talk about Ezekiel coughing and wheezing. I know there are lots of theories floating around about that, and I have a lot to say about it, but I’m saving it for the radiation post. Bear with me. (There’s SO much to talk about from this episode! Dah!)

We get a bunch of cool character references. One to Tara, several to Rick. Also Jesus and Eric. I really liked those.

Setups:

I always say that the premiere episode sets up what will happen throughout the season. But because we also have some changes to the opening credits, this is not only the beginning of a new season, but the beginning of new arc. So these may be setups for the season, or for a much larger arc. No way to tell for sure yet.

1. The most obvious is the Whisper War. Alpha knows they crossed the border and that will probably be the kickoff of the official war.

2. Aaron is sick of being the “nice guy,” and Negan wants to lay low and avoid getting his hands dirty where the Whisperers are concerned. All those who think either of things will lead to a peaceful life, raise your hands.

In the CBs, Negan gets involved in the Whisper War in a big way, and while it will probably be different in show, I think that’s what they’re setting up here. I have a lot to say about Aaron, but for now, just revisit THIS POST where I talk about how he will probably be involved in Beth’s return as well.

3. Siddiq is having serious post-traumatic stress over the killings he witnessed in 9x15. That can’t be good.

4. The stuff with Eugene, the satellite, and the radiation reference are all important and probably setting something up. Again, more detail on where I think it’s going to come, but just keep it in mind for now. They went out of their way to emphasize these things in the premiere, and that’s significant.

5. Daryl and Carol. Shipping wars aside, their conversations together probably had more TD symbolism and references than any other in the episode. For the most part, I found it to be very inline with what I said in THIS POST about them taking off together and how it follows the template from S5. More details to come on this as well, but the two of them finding Beth together (as they did in S5) would explain why they have all these references. I’ll illustrate more over the next few days.

6. Coming Drought. We’ve been talking a lot about water scarcity that’s coming because of Fear. We saw references to it here because when they were trying to put out the fire, people were constantly saying, “I’m out of water.” That’s a dialogue foreshadow, y’all. And it’s in conjunction with the satellite and radiation references. So just keep it in mind.

7. Beth! The last is the best. Between Connie bringing Dog to Daryl and the Luke/Jules/Hotdog reference, I feel like this is setting up that Beth will return to Daryl sometime during this arc. New Opening credits show that we’ve entered a new arc. One in which Beth will return.

Unfortunately, I can’t say for sure that it will happen this season. I’ll talk more about the structure of this episode and how it foreshadows what we’ll see during this arc in a day or two, but sometimes these arcs can last multiple seasons. So I’m not going to say that I think for sure she’ll return in S10 (though I certainly hope she will) but rather than it will be in this arc, which could possibly be several seasons long.

Shipping:

I’ll end by mentioning the Connie and Carol situations. Only because I know there’s a lot of meltdowns happening in various fandoms right now. Just know that there’s nothing to worry about.

I know people have noticed the Kelly eyebrow raise. I did too, Obviously Kelly thinks there something going on there, but that doesn’t mean there is. At first, I thought maybe Connie’s reaction was one of embarrassment, which might show that Connie is crushing on Daryl. Even if that were the case, Daryl is much more focused on Carol than on Connie, so I think it’s safe to say he doesn’t return it.

But upon watching it again, I think Connie’s reaction to Kelly was more annoyance than embarrassment. Which suggests there isn’t anything there and she’s annoyed at Kelly for suggesting it.

Daryl is much more focused on Carol than Connie right now. Evidenced by the fact that he waved to her at the beach but didn’t bother to approach her. MUCH more focused on Carol. Which precludes a Donnie romance in my view.

But of course we also know Carol and Daryl are a mother/son relationship that will never be romantic. AK pretty much confirmed that a month or two ago in an interview where she said (and I paraphrase) “we know about the shippers, but even if it doesn’t go where they want it to, it’s still fun to have Daryl/Carol scenes in the show.” Yeah, really nothing to worry about there. So don’t.

Overall, I feel like the writers are pushing Connie and Carol equally as possible love interests. I already said this to my group, but my feeling is that they’re kind of saying, “Who will Daryl be with? Door #1: Carol? Or Door #2: Connie?” And it will actually be “hidden” door #3: Beth.

So I guess my point is that they’re teasing both so heavily, I don’t think either will happen. Yes, the shippers are gonna freak out. Nothing we can do about that. But that doesn’t mean they’re right.

Okay, I’m gonna stop there for today. More coming tomorrow. And a TON more coming over the next week. 😉

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

9 notes · View notes

brihana25 · 5 years

Text

In “Defense” of John Kreese

NOTE: Okay, here goes. I wrote this weeks ago, when I was still processing Season 2 (which, honestly, I’m still doing), and I wrote it in reaction to some of what I was seeing about Kreese in the wake of it. It’s long, so there’s a jump.

To say I was surprised to see the posts about Kreese would be an understatement. I meant and still mean no offense to anyone who expected more than we got, but it truly baffled me, because we got exactly what we were promised. I saw the betrayal coming from the last seconds of Mercy Part II, and I didn’t understand how other people didn’t.

So, this is me trying to explain why I felt and feel the way I do about Kreese. And for better or for worse, since I’m posting it, it’s open for discussion.

Wow. Talk about five words I never in a million years imagined I'd type.

I watched Season 2 of Cobra Kai within fifteen seconds of it dropping. Once I started, I didn't stop. I didn't pause. I was far from the only one. A little over five hours later, I'd seen the entire thing. I was devastated, of course. We all were. I intended to do an immediate rewatch, but I couldn't make myself do it. I was left reeling, numb, and completely emotionally drained for the rest of the day. Again, that's not unique to me. We all were. And even though I have rewatched it since then, more than once, that feeling hasn't really faded. I'm still having a hard time putting my thoughts and feelings into words. I know it's only a television show, but the impact it has had on me – on all of us – cannot really be explained. We're all shocked. We're all stunned. We're all feeling and dealing and still processing it.

If there is one word to sum up Season 2, it is this: brutal.

And no one was half as brutal as the man himself, the creator of Cobra Kai, the puppet master who holds everyone’s strings and pulls them to make them dance, knows every character's buttons and how to push them: John Kreese.

I know a lot of people are upset about Kreese still being bad. And not only is he bad, but he's possibly even more despicable and irredeemable than he was in the movies. I know a lot of people feel that they were lied to, or somehow misled, into believing he'd be a good guy by the end of the season.

I'm going to defend not only the pre-season interviews that may have led fans to believing that, but also the character of John Kreese himself. And those of you who know me and what I have said about this character in the past will understand what an odd thing this is for me to do. But one of the things I love most about this show, and about the movies that spawned it, are the characters and their development. That does include John Kreese, and it always has.

If you think back over what we were told about Kreese pre-season, no one ever said they were going to redeem him. The Big 3TM said they were going to make him human. They did. Martin Kove said he was "a little bit good, and a little bit bad." He is both.

First, to The Big 3TM's statements that either said or implied they were going to make him more human: they did. They made him much more human than he was in the movies; they just didn't make him a good one. Instead, he is devious, manipulative, abusive and cruel. And those are things that only humans can be.

He's always been a kind of caricature, a stock character "baddie" with memorable lines and no discernible motivations for being the way he was. The most human we saw him in the movies was at the beginning of The Karate Kid Part III. We see him walking down the street, alone, dejected. He is a broken man. He has lost everything and everyone, and he knows it. He has hit absolute rock bottom, and he does not know how to climb back up.

That doesn't last very long, of course. He walks into the dojo, glances at his bills, half-listens to his answering machine, picks up a newspaper article about Daniel's victory, and immediately, his dejection turns to anger. His desolation morphs into a singular obsession with destroying the old man who humiliated him and the child who dared to defeat him.

Terry's words to Daniel and Mr. Miyagi in the garden, about karate being Kreese's entire life, about losing his students (mostly Johnny, we now know) breaking his heart - I believe this was entirely true. It's probably one of the few honest things Terry said in the whole movie. It is also probably one of the purest descriptions of John Kreese’s motivation we have ever been given. There was a glimmer of hope at the beginning, in Kreese's conversation in the car with Terry, when it looked like maybe he wasn't wholly evil. But as we realized later, his protest to Terry that he didn't "need to do this" - didn't "need" to torture Daniel and Mr. Miyagi - was token only. He wanted it to happen. I'd go so far as to say that he played on Terry's love for and protectiveness of him to make it happen. That became obvious later in the movie, when he came up with the "brilliant" idea of making Daniel's knuckles bleed. And now that we have seen just how manipulative and calculating he can be, it fits with who and what he is.

Does he have PTSD? Certainly. He told Johnny as much when he said the psychiatrists wouldn't let him re-enlist. Does it stem from the Vietnam War? Again, there is very little doubt. Is he still fighting a war in his mind that never ended for him because he wasn't allowed to finish it? I don't question that for a second, either. Do any of those things excuse what he did - to children and adults both - after he returned? Absolutely not. Understanding his mind and seeing the world through his eyes gives us insight into why he is the way he is, but it doesn't excuse what he's done. And it doesn’t justify what he may do in the future.

Humans aren't always nice and decent. All people aren't basically good. Daniel learned that when he was sixteen years old. Johnny learned it at fifty-one. John Kreese is 100% human, and that's undeniable. They gave us exactly what they promised us.

As for Martin Kove's assertion that Kreese is "a little bit good, and a little bit bad": he is. This is where understanding his mind becomes vital. Kreese's "bad" qualities are on clear and open display for us to see. His "good" qualities aren't as obvious, and some would say they don't exist at all. That is because his definition of "good" is warped, and it doesn't fit with how we understand that word.

Also, I believe very strongly that John Kreese loves Johnny Lawrence.

No, it doesn't look anything like love to most of us. It looks like control, and domination, and manipulation. It looks like abuse. And that's because it is. It is dysfunctional, and destructive, and based on a power imbalance that Kreese cannot let shift in Johnny's favor for even a second. But in John Kreese's mind, it is love.

Make no mistake about it, Kreese abused both of these men when they were children. He abused Johnny - mentally and emotionally - for five years. Whether the karate training ever rose to the level of physical abuse is debatable, but after what we saw in Season 2, in Johnny's memory of receiving his blue belt, the rest of it is inarguable. The hardest concept to grasp, after watching just that one small memory and the impact it still has on Johnny almost 40 years later, is that Kreese honestly believed, and still does, that he was doing a good thing.

Listen to the things he says. Really listen to him. Even after everything that happens, even after Miguel and Robby, and Tory and Sam, and even after the destruction of everything and everyone Johnny loves, Kreese is still convinced that what he's doing is what's best for Johnny. He truly, honestly believes that he's helping him.

In his mind, he is making Johnny stronger. He is making him better. He is turning him into a good little soldier who will follow orders to the letter, because if he does what Kreese tells him, he will not and cannot lose. He is doing this because he doesn't want Johnny to feel the things he felt. He doesn't want Johnny to ever feel the sting of a defeat he had no choice but to accept. He sees in Johnny his chance to redeem himself for all the losses he himself has suffered, and he will use any means at his disposal to get him there.

His abuse of Daniel is strictly about punishment. He doesn't love him. He didn’t want to make him stronger. He didn’t want to turn him into a winner. His abuse of Daniel was purely for revenge. He smiled about it. He laughed about it. He wanted to see “a lot more” of it. He tortured a child, and he enjoyed it.

As much as John Kreese loves Johnny Lawrence, he hates Daniel LaRusso.

He hates him for forcing defeat on Johnny. He hates him for being a better student, or a better fighter, or a better anything than Johnny. He hates Mr. Miyagi for being a better teacher, or a better fighter, or just a better everything than him. Mr. Miyagi succeeded in turning Daniel into what Kreese failed in getting Johnny to be, and so Daniel - at the ripe old age of sixteen - gets the dubious distinction of being the living embodiment of both Johnny's and Kreese's failures. Kreese will never forgive him for any of that.

And so, Kreese (in conjunction with Terry Silver, of course) brainwashes him. They convince him to torture himself, and they torture Mr. Miyagi through him. They turn him into something he isn't and never has been. They turn him into the opposite of what Mr. Miyagi taught him to be. They send him home every night, bloody and bruised and completely oblivious to the fact that he's a nothing more than a pawn to them. He's a toy. If Johnny is Kreese's good little soldier, Daniel is his cannon fodder.

Kreese loves Johnny, and he hates Daniel, and he destroyed them both. But what has to be understood is that in his mind, everything he’s done have been "good" things.

To redeem Kreese now, to turn him into a "good guy," to have both of his victims forget and forgive him for everything he did, would not only be wholly unbelievable, it would invalidate everything they've been through. It would erase everything that turned the children they were into the men they are. It would cheapen and dismiss everything Kreese did to them.

It wouldn't just "flip the script" on their story. It would rewrite it wholesale.

At its heart, Cobra Kai is Johnny's and Daniel's story. Kreese plays a large part in that story, absolutely. But it’s not his. What they suffered at his hands shaped who and what they are, what they feel about each other, and what they believe about themselves. For better or worse, he is Cobra Kai.

He is their boogeyman.

And if the show is about Johnny and Daniel, then it has to be about them dealing with the impact Cobra Kai - and John Kreese - has had and continues to have on them and the people they love. For that to be possible, Kreese has to remain what he is and has always been.

A little bit good, and a whole lot bad.

#cobra kai #cobra kai season 2 #john kreese #daniel larusso #johnny lawrence #i essayed a thing #fangirling again #meta ahoy!

41 notes · View notes

bryanfaganlaw · 5 years

Text

In what circumstances would your child end up living with your relative during a CPS case?

If you have need a best suitable service your Child Law experience, In what circumstances would your child end up living with your relative during a CPS case? with the great process!

Houston Family Lawyer: If you have a relative or close family friend or is able and interested in housing your child during a Child Protective Services (CPS) case then you should speak to that person about contacting CPS. Obviously, their home would need to be safe to be up for consideration. Just because a family member is willing to house your child does not mean that a person is well suited for that responsibility. You can also provide your CPS caseworker with that person’s name and contact information and the caseworker can make the initial contact that way.

An assessment will be done for any person who throws their hat into the ring to be considered as a temporary landing spot for your child. That home assessment will review your relative's background, their home, and their overall suitability to be a placement location for your child.

What will CPS do to help your child ensure that they are able to go to school during the CPS case?

CPS wants your child to be able to attend school and be successful in doing so. Just because the rest of your life is a little topsy turvy at the moment doesn’t mean that your child’s education has to be held back. It goes without saying that children that are better educated and exposed to more opportunities to learn have a head start over those children that do not.

Your child’s caseworker will work with your child, their school and your child’s foster family in order to help you do well in school. For older children, graduating from high school and then preparing for life on their own is a major developmental step for these kids.

CPS will aim to keep your child enrolled in the same school he or he has been attending before being removed from your home. However, it may be determined that staying at the same school is not good for your child or Is not possible. In that case, your caseworker or foster parent will enroll you in a new school within a few days so that your educational goals may be met. Wherever your child will go to school, the caseworker and the foster family will ensure that transportation is provided for your child.

School districts employ persons to work with foster families helping to address the needs of students who are in foster care. If your child is having problems with their schoolwork then he should alert their foster parent, a caseworker with CPS, their teacher or a counselor to let him or she knows.

Part of the monthly visits that your child has with their caseworker will revolve around performance in the classroom. Their caseworker will even help your child to pick out classes to take in high school in order to earn a diploma.

What happens if your child is about to turn 18? Does CPS offer any programs for him or her?

Your child will no longer be in the custody of the state after he or she reaches 18 years old. However, it is not required that your child leave foster care at that time. Your child may not be in a position to leave foster care and live on their own at that time. It is possible that your child will have educational goals yet to accomplish and he or she may still need to save money to rent an apartment, buy a car or do a range of activities that are necessary for a person who is living independently.

There will be a trial independence period that can last for up to six months after your child leaves foster care. A judge in your child's case can extend this period of time for an additional six months. During this time period, there will most likely not be anything happening in your case and your child will not have to go to court for many reasons.

Additionally, your child can remain in extended foster care until their 21stbirthday if he or she needs additional time to work on their career, education or their housing situation. In order to take advantage of this program, you would need to tell CPS that you will be attending a college or vocational school, going to a work preparation program or be working at least 80 hours a month.

Definitions of common words and phrases that you will hear in conjunction with a CPS case

Divorce Lawyer Houston: Attorney ad litem: refers to a lawyer that is assigned by the judge in your CPS case to represent the interests of your child. Your interests, it may surprise you to learn, do not always match up perfectly with those of your child in CPS cases. For example, if you truly do offer a long term threat to your child’s well being it is not in the best interest of your child for your child to return home to you.

You will probably disagree with that and will work to have your child returned home, however. The job of the attorney ad litem is to work with your child to see what their desire is far as a permanent solution to where he or she will live.

Guardianship: It may be that your child is not able to care for himself/herself after their 18thbirthday due to a disability or impairment. If that is the case, a judge can appoint a guardian for the child. These are very extreme situations that warrant the appointment of a guardian. The state wants all adults to be able to make decisions for themselves if at all possible. You may be appointed as a guardian for your child or if your parental rights are terminated, another person would fulfill that role.

Court Appointed Special Advocate: A Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) is a volunteer who works through the court to advocate on behalf of your child. This person may or may not have any background in the law or with CPS. This is a person that has a heart for families in need. The CASA volunteer will work with your child, their foster family and you to make recommendations to the court as to what should happen with your child on a long term basis.

CPS Caseworker: A CPS caseworker will work with you and your child while he or she is in foster care. This person will ensure that your child is being cared for, that he or she is going to school and that you are working on the goals of your CPS service plan. The caseworker is your primary point of contact between yourself and CPS. Developing a relationship with this person and communicating with him or her as often as possible is a good goal to have.

Managing Conservator: The ultimate job of the judge in your child’s CPS case is to determine who should have the right to make decisions, care for your child and provide a home for your child on a long-term basis. The name of the person with these rights is known as the managing conservator of your child.

You could be named as the managing conservator of your child, a relative could be named as such or the state could fill that role. This role is similar to that of a guardian, which we discussed earlier in this blog post. The key difference is that a guardian looks out for the interests of a person over the age of 18.

Permanency plan: Child Protective Services will work with the judge in your case to develop a plan whose ultimate goal is to find a place for your child to live on a permanent basis. The best interests of your child are the primary consideration to be made in this regard. That can be difficult to understand for parents. The judge's primary concern is not what you want or what will make you feel good.

Often times the goal of a permanency plan will be to reunite your child with you in your home. In other cases, the goal of the permanency plan will be to have your child live permanently with a relative. Still, others will see the goal as having your child remain in the custody of the State.

Thoughts on foster care and CPS

Houston Divorce: Without a doubt, nobody wants to become involved in a CPS case. Likewise, nobody wants their child to be removed from their house and placed into foster care. However, if you find yourself in a position where these folks have become a part of your life you should not take a passive approach to the case. Learn as much as you can about both subject areas so that you can make good decisions for yourself and for your child ... Continue Reading

1 note · View note

sunshinechay · 5 years

Note

The progress in Octavia's redemption arc(s) this season doesn't feel earned yet

I tend to disagree. I really liked Octavia’s redemption this season, especially because most of my issues with her was her refusal to admit that she did anything wrong and to recognize that she needs to do better. She has done that and is completely willing to do whatever it takes to do her part in helping everyone. Octavia is a character that we know will stay on a path once she’s on it until she is met by an immovable plot object. She is on a path to continue her redemption into next season and that was all I needed for her to feel earned for me. I can’t speak to anyone else’s opinion but I’ve enjoyed it.

I will say that one aspect that felt a little off was Bellamy’s attitude the last few episodes. Don’t get me wrong, I love that my Blake siblings aren’t at each other’s throats anymore, but the teasing seemed out of place for me. I put that down mostly to it was likely written and filmed in conjunction with the deleted parts of the scene in 6x11 so it’s more an error in continuity than any issue I have with Octavia or her redemption. His hurt at the end of season does feel earned because as angry and understandably hurt he might be over Octavia’s actions (both towards him and others), she is still his sister and I absolutely believe that he would be devastated if something happened to her. Their relationship definitely needs to be developed more for me to feel like it’s completely earned but for now I suppose I’ll take what I can get haha

Octavia still has a long way to go, but for now I think her redemption is going pretty well, if not perfectly. Of course everyone is entitled to their opinion and I can completely understand why you would feel like she hasn’t earned everything yet and I definitely want to see everything being built on but I think she’s doing pretty well for now :)

#anonymous #the 100 #octavia blake #blarke wine club #i do ask memes now ask memes are cool #sometimes i scream into the void

1 note · View note

braindamageforbeginners · 6 years

Text

more FAQ

Cycle 10, Day 13

So, I spent this morning hanging out writer-y people and I was asked such a good question, I thought I’d use it as another FAQ. As always, I can only answer for myself on these things, ask a physician or real grown-up if you have any doubts. And to all my friends and family who think I’d use a blog to update my health status if things go bad - that’s what Instagram is for, people.

Q: What will my cancer treatment be like?

A; Exceptionally and amazingly unpleasant, I should imagine. Even though I don’t really like the whole “warfare/warrior” metaphor, there is one useful thing about it. I’ve heard from enough combat veterans - in various ways and media that, no matter how well it’s described, surviving modern warfare is indescribable to anyone who doesn’t have prior experience. Same goes here - until you survive a terminal illness, or get that fatal phone call, you really don’t know what it’ll be like, no matter how good I am at describing it. All I can tell you with any certainty is that you will have to develop a completely unassailable faith that you will outlast this thing. From that, you can get start developing the sort of pig-headed stubbornness you’re going to need to win this thing and carve out some sort of normal life. Having said that, I’d also say that you might have to modify your life and life goals, like Data in the game Strategema, in the immortal Trek episode “Peak Performance,” when he (Data) successfully challenges the annoying bureaucrat/ambassador caricature to a rematch: “ I was playing for a standoff, a draw. While Kolrami was dedicated to winning, I was able to pass up obvious avenues of advancement, then settle for a balance. Theoretically, I should be able to challenge him indefinitely. ” It sucks that you might have to put your life on hold in a potentially-never-ending stand-off with a disease, And I’m not going to argue that life is worth living - that’s your decision, and there are potential long-term constraints to my survival that I wouldn’t consider acceptable, but you might. Also, keep in mind, that same episode has the line, “ It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life. “ These are dangerous diseases - deadly if mistreated or mishandled, and frequently deadly even with the bestest care. You’re going to have to see those sort of statistics like “90% fatality rate” and say, “Fuck that, I’ll take those odds, someone hold my seat while I get a drink.” Of course, it’s easy to say that now. However, more to the point of the question, I’ve had a multicourse treatment starting with neurosurgery, then radiation and chemo, and maintenance chemo. After each step, you’re likely to get a week or two off to recover before your doctors review the results, and clear you for the next step. Treasure those weeks off, they might be your only progression-free moments where it looks like you’re on the upswing. And remember, the phrase, “I would recommend more treatment” is a good thing. Cancer patients only get sent three places: home, the hospital, or the hospice. More treatment and hospitals are bad, expensive, and dangerous, but they beat the hell out of 33% of the options.In my case - in the case of most chronic cancer patients - I’m not wild about five years of chemo, but it does beat the alternatives. When our post-Mastodon species talks about “killer instinct,” it’s usually in some unhelpful motivational seminar. No one talks about it for what it really is - coldly, and grimly doing whatever is necessary to outlast your enemy, which, in this case, is a rogue bit of you. Nietzsche talked about “will to power,” and it’s been used in conjunction with some horrific rhetoric and movements, but I’d advise you to embrace it if it’s the only way to get home again. However, my treatment has been: 1. Neurosurgery 2. 4 weeks off 3. Initial chemoradiation for 6 weeks (that’s brutal) 4, a few weeks off 5. maintenance chemo consisting of 5 days of Temodar and three marizomib infusions 6, ?

Q: Do you ready things about your disease differently than you do other biomedical studies and/or literature?

A. Oh, fuck, yes. I once read that the tell-tale sign of privilege is ignorance (about their privilege and those in a harder circumstances)(which, as someone who’s had a few of those permanently revoked - there was a time when the words “third floor” didn’t have me looking for an elevator)(still, a limp and/or ankle braces definitely beats that horrifying walker). In the same way, an ability to classify knowledge as “academic” is a sign of intellectual privilege (or complacence, which is the next step of privilege). I am absurdly invested in anything I read about GBM. Or cancer. Like, I understand - and kind of agree with - the old rule about not allowing physicians to treat their family members. You’re not going to exhibit the same degree of clarity and judgment. Same thing for me - I’m nigh-immortal on my good days (or with a morale boost), and, potentially dead on the bad ones. It’s exhausing, but, at the same time, i don’t know why we exhibit such disinterest in other areas (Ladies, I’m still single). You are either 1000% focused and committed, or not a all. You know what doctors call cancer patients who successfully complete half of their required treatment before giving up? “Dead.” There’s a good chance you’ll die, anyway, not committing to a treatment course once you’ve started is just a very expensive form of lengthy suicide. Additionally, even though I still use clinicaltrials.org and PubMed as my primary-source services on such things, I’m not as interested as I used to be. Don’t get me wrong, I am still absolutely interested in any new developments in my disease or treatment plan - I literally spent a few hours every week on those sites, but, in August, after John McCain died - from the same disease - and GBM treatment studies went from a few dozen on the FDA page to hundreds - I really started to believe - still do - that If I can just live long enough, healthily enough, science will catch up with me.

Additionally, there aren’t many cases of brain cancer of any sort, so you have to take a less methodical, statistical approach, and start looking at the outliers. I call this the Jack Lallane vs biochemistry approach. Stick with me. So, many years ago, a biochem professor in grad school pointed out that, according to the studies, there was no benefit to the sort of excessive protein consumption promoted by body builders, athletes, and other healthy-looking people. I probably should have realized this was coming from a 5′ middle-aged British man who looked the part, and taken it with a grain of salt. At a friend’s encouragement, I did start taking the supplements and what-not, and, as it turns out, further investigation and research showed that protein doesn’t promote muscle growth, unless it’s consumed within an hour of the workout. This is one of those cases where having incomplete information - as my professor did, as eventual research showed - is actually worse than ignorance. To that end, even though I try to keep current on research and development on GBM, I’m less interested in conventional wisdom and studies, and more on what the statistical outliers suggest. This is not to suggest for a minute that you will be better-informed than researchers - again, when the Warlocks or Mad Scientist say “No,” I usually take them at their word. But GBM research is a very weird and strange area of cancer research (again, it was nigh-impossible to find physicians who would agree to treat the disease as aggressively as they could; so we’re talking about a cancer that’s only been formally studied by epidiomology and science for 20-odd years), so I’ve gone with trying to track down data on those few outliers who outlived the 14-24 month life expectancy (also, good news, a recent study showed that almost 30% of us live for at least two years post-diagnosis), and figuring out how they did it. So far - and this is useful - the major commonalities are that they did successfully get a medical team to take them seriously, treat them aggressively, and they survived the treatment, which is still almost as-likely to kill you as the disease. They all also stressed the importance of “complementary medicine” in addition to the real stuff. So, again, full disclosure, I am not a fan of “alternative medicine,” which is when you get the unproven or unstudied stuff instead of traditional Western Medicine, but I am a massive fan of “complementary medicine” which is when you use the freaky stuff in addition to the established, standard stuff (and a crazy hallucinogenic, experimental chemo trial would qualify, I think). “Eating healthy” and “staying psychotically active” are also included in that category. We can talk about fad diets and nutrition, but, again, just going old-school Jack Lallane, I try to get 7-10 servings of raw fruits and vegetables (I really don’t think the “raw” part is very important, but it would take time and energy to cook them, and I’d rather that go into writing or research)(which reminds me, I have to look into photo enhancement/editing techniques this week). “Coffee” is also not on anyone’s nutritionally-recommended list, which makes me ponder how those researchers survived their patients. And such things aren’t studied by most researchers; I don’t think that’s because there’s any insidious pharmacy conspiracy, I just think it’s hard to find qualified patients (again, the rules governing these things are usually established by human rights laws and treaties, add the various dos and don’ts of a clinical trial selection into you reach anothe order of magnitude for cost and lack of returns), and, in many cases, there’s no need to reinvent the wheel. With one notable exception. In addition to being a massive fan of fitness and nutrition as a way to keep healthy and vital enough to convince your physicians to douse you in Agent Orange, I’ve also become a major proponent of medical marijuana. Again, not because it’ll cure cancer, but because it’s better at treating some of the nastier side-effects than established pharmaceuticals (and it’s telling that the shift comes just as a lot of lawmakers and pharmaceutical giants start divesting themselves of standard stuff and invest in medical marijuana development and research). And what I didn’t know at the beginning, that I wished I did now, is that the side-effects and problem stack up in standard chemoradiation. It was harder to drag myself to the infusion center on Cycle 9 than Cycle 5. But I was there.

1 note · View note