#and i don't wanna worry my friends | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sga-owns-my-soul · 9 months

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lol ignore this 🙃

i can't stop crying at work because everything in my life is going wrong and this stupid shit with my stupid cousin and family is upsetting me so much and it shouldn't be and i feel so fucking stupid for being bothered by this bc it's what i wanted!!! but no i'm wrong again and this time they're just all fully cutting me off and i'm working non fucking stop and still can't afford anything bc the world is going to absolute fucking shit and i'm just so sick of feeling like i can't do anything right ever and i've been feeling suicidal every fucking day for an entire fucking MONTH because of everything and my cousin was who i always reached out to when things got bad and i fucking can't because SHES NOT TALKING TO ME and i'm going to cry AGAIN FUCK

i'm so sick of this

i'm so sick of falling apart because of my family

i'm so sick of never being good enough

i'm so sick of feeling like this

i'm so fucking tired

#ignore this #i just need to cry about this #and i don't wanna worry my friends #so im gonna scream into the void #i know im just being dumb and dramatic im sorry #tw suicidal thoughts #please feel free to not read any of this and ignore me #i'm not going to do anything #i'm just #i'm so fucking tired #i haven't felt this consistently suicidal since high school #and im just. im so tired #im so fucking sick and tired of feeling this way #i just want a fucking break #i'm literally sobbing in the bathroom typing this up #why can't i catch a fuckimg break fuck #personal rambles #not important #not stargate

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thedreadvampy · 3 months

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sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'

#red said #recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis #like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes #and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not #for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening #i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine #as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital #as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin #ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes #some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am #bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me #like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD #there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife #but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't #tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us #like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well #i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point #anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also #been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them #i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it #most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables #honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk #is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry

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genshin-impact-updates · 2 years

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al haithan fuckung HATES YOU. he wants u to DIE he wants u to *reads smudged writing on hand* to be BRUTALLLY RIPPPED APART WITH YOUR BLOOD SPILLINF OUUT!!!

Bet you thought I wouldn't publish this, huh? :)

#(THIS IS MY FRIEND DO NOT BE CONCERNED)#(it's a long story don't worry about it i just wanna expose them as a HATER)#(sorry for putting this on your dash carry on)#ask box #not an update #harassment cw #i fucking guess. you went in on this one

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sketchy-tour · 11 months

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scuttles in

Dandy is precious and I feel like they would be friends with Gloom

Scuttles away

I AGREE I THINK THEY SHOULD BE FRIENDS!!!!

Gloom beloved @theknifeclown

#welcome home #welcome home puppet show #welcome home oc #gloom twilight #dandy leon #welcome home arg #ask #sketches #my art #*answers this extremely late because I was stupid and wanted to doodle them together for this*#I LOVE GLOOM SO MUCH THO YOU HAVE NO IDEA #also gosh drawing him??? Man Gloom is PRETTY #Pretty man I love him #Don't ask why I drew Dandy sitting so silly idk it kinda just happened and TBH I think its cute #They're friends your honor!!!!!#Ngl Dandy would find Glooms floating the COOLEST. Like. Big eyed staring the first time they saw Gloom doing a silly little float #Probably often just sort of reach up and poke at Gloom while they're both chatting #just in awe to see a puppet float. Oh man Gloom would be so fun to spin with too. Grab his hands and spin around #Hello this is my friend he floats dont worry about that anyway wanna watch me spin him in the air?????

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mewkwota · 1 year

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"He let himself in again? I shall handle this, my lord." ". . . Yes. . . ." ("Why the long pause...")

Look who's back, the un(?)wanted guest. And yet, you haven't shooed him away, have you? There's no hiding it, we already know Dracula doesn't entirely mind Richter's company-- look at that face.

#I like my richter to be happy and strong and not forgotten to be fed for a whole year by some creepy old dude #can you tell I don't feel well? my anatomy here is pretty shaky #but I'm gonna try-- I really wanna draw the boy still but I have to take it slowly-- Again. ( J;; ^;; )J #doodle-daas #castlevania #dracula vlad tepes #richter belmont #and death is also here #he's just worried about the active threat sitting very close to his master-best-friend-or-so #anti netflixvania

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blujaynoodles · 7 months

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'it...... yes.'

#dnd #doodles #gnome #character art #this is unrelated to anything but I realized while drawing the coffee pot that she would definitely have a Whimsical coffee pot #but I didn't wanna trip at the finish line by overthinking designing a gnomish coffee pot for a noncanon joke doodle #bold of me to make a 'no one in the party fucks' joke when canon!mel also hasn't had a date in........ well don't worry about it lmao #anyway her druid friend is an aroace dragonborn teen there is a zero percent chance he knows what a hickey is #my OCs #melliwyk

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chiimeramanticore · 3 days

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#im not dead quit asking #I'm just really really really not doing well #sorry if i scared anyone. that wasnt my intent #things got. let's say worse. for me irl. more complicated for sure #i hate to publicize my breakdown I really do. but maybe i... need this? in a weird way?#i haven't really been adjusting well to having a platform online. that's not anyone's fault but mine ofc #i feel that my 'fans' (if ive earned the right to call them that) dont and frankly cant ever care for me as a person #i dont know you and you dont know me. you dont know all of me at least. just what i make public. what i allow others to see #i had it kinda bullied into me that i need to keep my mouth shut abt my own issues. and ive spent a lot of this year trying to unlearn that #maybe publicizing this is a bad idea anyway #I just know ive been more honest abt my emotions and my personal life with my friends and my partner #and not everyone enjoys it but i know I'm not like. traumadumping so i feel somewhat assured that anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt my life-#-probably wasnt all that interested in forming a close relationship w me to begin with. even if theyre friendly at first #everyone else; the people who I know care about me; have shown me that through their actions #my point is being honest abt how youre doing w other ppl is a good idea. revolutionary i know lol #and i still don't know a lot of you personally but #parasocial or not i got some very genuine sounding messages while I was gone. and i. feel really bad that i worried those people #I guess theres my proof that people would care if i disappeared suddenly. people would notice pretty quick it seems #im never gonna kms btw. even if i didnt have the support i have im simply too stubborn to die lol. to put it lightly #and to those who thought this was abt fandom drama: it's not. those who shall not be named are genuinely the least of my problems these days #I'm on a journey of self actualization. or something. im trying to get my shit together. im trying to stop being clinically depressed lol #but god keeps throwing wrenches in my plans and. i beat myself up about it too much #but that's just life. they say you make a plan and god laughs #im. trying to be okay with just riding the wave. im impatient but if i keep trying to somehow speed up time im just gonna exhaust myself #which I think is where im at now. burnt out #and on top of all that i still feel this need to like. perform for you guys #if i dont keep making content everyone will forget i exist. if i dont make another video essay this year can i even call myself a youtuber #etc etc. its the spiral its impostor syndrome we've all been there #im trying to end this on a positive note but idk. i dont have all the answers yet #hoping i figure it out soon. i hope you dont forget me in the meantime

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creaturefeaster · 10 months

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Hey this is probably a really odd ask to get but someone has been claiming to be your friend and saying that Holly abuses Weepy & I want it to be confirmed or denied directly from your account. What is Holly and Weepy's friendship like, and does Holly actually like Weepy to any degree?

Hey man I'm a very asocial person, I basically only talk to my husband and my best friend Syd. I don't know whoever is saying that because I've never said anything like that to anybody. Good on you for verifying.

Holly is a jerk to everyone, but he doesn't go around beating on people or anything. He thinks himself too pretty for that <3 hope this helps.

#anybody online claiming to be my friend is lying unless they can say they were at my wedding.#my social bubble involves my husband my best friend. and then like 2 other friends who i talk to every once in a while #you can also take comfort in knowing that none of my friends are active in any fan space/fandom involving anything I do.#so don't worry about claims like this unless it comes directly from me :3 #anyway holly and weepys friendship is extremely complex and a lot of it revolves around heavy plot #that i dont wanna spoil at the moment.#brambleramble

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ziipzeepzop-eez · 4 months

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Zeepie... I'm having a bad day, can you tell me a joke to make me feel better?

I hope you're day is going better. I'll tell you a joke too,

Why do you not want to pick a fight with a dinosaur?

Because you'll get jur-ASS-kicked- Heheh

HELP NOMZ I MEANT TO ANSWER THIS LAST NIGHT???? AND THEN I WENT TO MY SECOND JOB AND FUDGING FORGOT AFTER I CAME HOME URGHGHGHHH 😭😭😭 Like I was awake but meant to come on here and it just slipped my mind bby I'm so sorryyyuyyy

AH BUT I'M HERE NOW!! 🥲🥺 I'm so sorry you had a bad day yesterday, honeycomb. Hugs and forehead kisses. 😚🫂 HUGS!!! AND EVEN MORE HUGS!!!

Ah!! A joke, okay okay, I got one— hekeHERGM- *sits you down cozily on the couch with fuzzy blankets, squishmallows and a mug of Ponyo honey milk* *serenely reads from a Ghibli-themed notepad, pushing my glasses farther up my nose bridge*

How can you tell if a vampire is sick?

((*crickets chirping*))

Snrk—

By how much he is coffin.

*cackles as I rock back and forth in my chair, which wobbles in place precariously*

((*cue some racuous bgs [background sounds]* "Ohh brother, this guy STINKS!!" "She doesn't even go here!" "MY GRANDMOTHER COULD'VE TOLD A BETTER JOKE FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE--"))

Mm, well? 😃😄 Did I make my Nomzie laughhhhh??~ 💕

P.S, I like your joke better. 🥰 *nose muwah*

#"૮₍ •⤙•˶|✉️ beep! inbox! ˎˊ˗#my normie nomzie ࣪🪻 ִֶָ☾.#i swear i prioritize you my sweet friend it's just life in general #DON'T WORRY BBY I UNDERSTANDDDDDD #i'm here for you <3 #especially if you ever wanna talk!!#i know how rough adulting can be :'))#so let's have fun too. okay?

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renmackree · 19 days

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Why do you W*ndingo?

Where I grew up, even writing their name could summon them to you. It's respect of the wild and unknown, the old ways you could say.

#I don't say it out loud #I barely wanna think it #My friends and I call them anything but #It's the Midwest and we respect the winter in all ways #It's not offensive if that's what your worried about #It's just a respect thing

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watermelinoe · 9 months

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my niece once got upset w my dad bc he wouldn't buy her some overpriced drunk elephant skincare product. she was freaked out about getting wrinkles. at age eight. i wish her mom had never bought her that damn smartphone

#idk if my brother is dad of the year or anything but he didn't want her to have the smartphone so points for that #her mom bought it so she could track my niece whenever she's with her dad (my brother) and text her constantly #and considering she's so petty that she made my niece leave an easter gathering with a terminal family member early it's like #i'm sure she has her side of it and my brother was probably a dick somehow but girl you're punishing an eight year old about it #and i really don't think shit like ''ice age is for boys (so i won't watch it)'' came from my brother #i'm sure i'm biased bc it's my brother but genuinely i think she bought my niece that phone to spite him #and now she's just glued to it bc that's what smartphones are designed to do !!!!#you would really fuck up your own kid's attention span and self esteem just to get back at your ex???#and this isn't even the worst parenting move on her part but luckily that guy died and can't be around my niece anymore ever <3 #but i just worry about her. since i moved away i don't really get to see her.#and not to be narcissistic but i feel like it's good for her to see women w short hair no makeup comfy clothes etc.#i wanna be a good example for her #i told her she should just worry about washing with soap wearing sunscreen and drinking lots of water #i just can't relate at all. at her age all my friends were boys and i was into dinosaurs and pokemon and werewolves #a lot of girls... didn't really like me 😔 i remember being upset bc one girl called me a tomboy #anyway if u read all this. secret radioactive kiss just for u. mwah 💚

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transgender-catboy · 4 months

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can I just message one of my friends with

HEY GORGEOUS!!! I missed ya, haven't talked to you in a hot second, hope you're well!

or is that too much?

#I'm gonna chew my fucking arm off i swear to god #i just wanna shower my friends with love and affection #compliments and all that #but i still... get worried #i dont wanna be too much #i know affection can be overwhelming (i cant take compliments. i just. i cant)#and i know i can be a little cheesy #or cringe #and i don't wanna weird my friends out #vent #idk idk idk

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eeveearoace · 21 days

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y'all ever just. meow

#i meow around my friends all the time #they say it doesn't bother them. but i'm worried they just don't wanna hurt my feelings? idk #i do really love meowing tho #kaivee rambles

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notasouleater · 6 months

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long day

#Homemade trinkets #My art #Narrative exploits #Detective #The #Don't worry about that name tag I just don't want to put this in the theatre tag #Yknow when you're too tired to do work but can still focus on characters well #I've simply been thinking so dang much about Theatre being friends with Detective and this happened #I always wanna comment on things I don't like in my art and yall I am putting in the effort not to do that #On that note no I don't know how to draw hats #I Did put in a bg so that's big

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hooved · 2 years

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how do i convey to my friends that my love for you is literally unconditional as long as you're not an asshole. and that if i'm willingly talking to you then it means i have deemed you Not An Asshole. like as long as you wouldn't intentionally do anything to hurt me or my other friends then literally anything else you do or say is fine forever and i love you and you can be as weird or quiet or loud around me as you want and talk about anything you want whenever you want for as long as you want and i cherish every second we spend together. how do i make everyone believe this for real

#i'm very very serious btw like it's the most distressing thing in the world to me when anyone doubts my love for them #because it literally never changes. even if you think you did something wrong i probably don't see it as a problem at all. you're fine #if you're my friend then i love you like a dog forever. i just wanna talk to ppl and be around ppl all the time #i worry about starting conversations too like. i do get it. but i always always always welcome ppl starting conversation with me #i'm not always the best at replying but it's never ever because i don't want to. i just suck at thinking #but sometimes i end up talking to ppl nonstop for hours about whatever silly shit comes to our minds and that's the best !!!#i want that always

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hepbaestus · 3 months

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:|

TW: covid mention/illness/coughing (nothing graphic or major)

#i fucking hate being ill #after getting covid 2 years ago. every time i get ill the cough stays so. much. longer. than it needs to #like that was my remaining symptom from covid and that shit lasted MONTHS #because it's now actually stopping me from hanging out with friends because i sound like I'm coughing up a fucking LUNG every time #and i wanna go see people and not have them worry about me being ill (which ik they'd do anyways but less so)#and it's slowly getting to the point where it's hurting my chest to cough because it's so often #i just hope it leaves soon because i want to go home next week for my brother's birthday and i don't want to be coughing the whole way #it also doesn't help that i was asthmatic as a kid/teen so my lungs prolly aren't the greatest anyways #just realised how ranty this is so if by chance you read all of this; i hope you're doing well :)

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