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itsdappleagain · 9 months

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48 for the spotify wrapped

48: My Dead Gay Son from Heathers the Musical

oh boy. this one might be a wild ride. highly recommend you listen to the whole song if you're unfamiliar.

here is a recording of the stage production with...erm...visuals and here is the cast recording with better audio!

They're up there disco dancing to the thump of angel wings! They grab a mate… And roller skate— While Judy Garland sings! They live a playful afterlife that's fancy-free and reckless! They swing upon the pearly gates— And wear a pearly necklace!

summary: jean paul and antonio fake their own deaths in order to escape the dangerous life VILE has put them on and must secretly watch their own "funeral" in order to make sure no one suspects they are still alive.

---

It starts with a note, slipped furtively into the hand of Carmen Sandiego in a fight both of them know is going too easily. Le Chevre holds her gaze and immediately makes good on his whispered promise to to leave right then and there without a fight, telling the Faculty she defeated him as always.

The note she opens says this:

Antonio and I need your help. We are defecting from VILE- we want to start a future together, but we don't have anywhere to go. We are afraid they will find us...you know what they would do if they found out. You are the only one to have ever left VILE and lived to see another day. Please help us. We know you don't have any reason to, so all we can do is beg. Antonio and Jean Paul

Carmen, of course, helps them. It is her nature. Together, secretly, the three begin to plan the deaths of Le Chevre and El Topo.

Tigress is the unwitting unlucky winner of the "who gets to witness their death" contest. Once everything is set in place and Antonio, Jean Paul, and Tigress are scheduled on the same mission again, Carmen makes arrangements for them and the plan goes into motion.

At 11:44pm Tigress sends the duo into their empty target building to scout it out. At 11:49 the building blows up in a ball of fire and ash and shrapnel, and Tigress must flee before the police arrive, streaked with soot and, against her will, crying.

She is the first one to see the news report that the police found the charred remains of two unidentified bodies in the wreckage of the building. She is the first to alert the faculty, and the one to begin arrangements for El Topo and Le Chevre's memorial.

Back in San Diego, Carmen sits with Antonio and Jean Paul, the air heavy as they watch the news report apparently announcing their own deaths.

"Tigress will be devastated." Antonio murmurs, eyes fixed on the circling overhead shot of the blackened building they'd snuck out of before Carmen had detonated the explosives. "She acts cold, but she will blame herself."

"It will make it all the more convincing." Carmen sighs, tracing her jaw with her fingers in contemplation. "If she knew..."

"Better that she does not." Jean Paul finishes, his hand squeezing Antonio's as they lean on one another. With Player messing with the police reports to make it seem as though their bodies had been found in the explosion, they are effectively invisible. Dead. Wiped off the map, and free to start their new lives together however they wanted.

Almost.

"I'm pulling up video and audio feed now." Player chimes from the base's speaker systems. "Good thing that I have the experience now to hack through VILE's 27 layers of encryption. Where did you set up those hidden cameras?"

"Where VILE always holds its memorials." Carmen says solemnly, her eyes just barely betraying a history of seeing more there than she cares now to admit. Her eyes flick to the two former operatives in her living room and they nod.

"The great hall. Last step," Jean Paul sighs, "see if they bought it."

The video feed flickers to life on their monitors- grainy and half-hidden where the two secretly set it up on VILE Island before their final mission. Everyone leans in, squinting as the fuzziness works itself out a little bit. The camera is hardly a centimeter in diameter, and, considering that, it is doing its best.

There, gathered in the grand hall, is a small crowd of operatives and the Faculty, gathered around the small table displaying their operative ID photos. Tigress, clearly wiping her eyes and trying not to show it, has just laid down a small bouquet by their photos.

Zack emerges from the kitchen and leans over the couch to where they're watching. Ivy hangs slightly behind, still suspicious of Antonio and Jean Paul. Zack whistles, oblivious to the tone in the room. "Too bad we can't have this camera on all the time. We shoulda got a man on the inside sooner!"

"Every minute that camera stays on in there is another minute it risks being discovered." Player explains briefly, his eyes still fixed on the feed on his own screen. "It'll self-destruct as soon as the ceremony is over, when I tell it to. We just need to confirm that El Topo and Le Chevre truly are dead to VILE and then we're out."

Zack hums noncommittally, attention drawn to the camera screen. Carmen's eyes are on the Faculty, watching for a sign of suspicion.

It's a second before Tigress's voice filters through their speakers. She stands at the front of the crowd, head bowed and fists clenched.

"Le Chevre and El Topo were part of my graduating class," she begins, a very un-Tigress-like hitch in her throat. "We spent the entire year training together and while- while we had our ups and downs they were some of my first friends here. There's something unbreakable about entering this life together. The two of them knew that better than anyone. I don't believe in any- any anything, really, but I hope that wherever they are now they're together, and-and that they're happy. You were some of the best, and I'm sorry that it wasn't me in that building instead of you. Rest well."

She finishes so quietly the camera's microphone almost doesn't pick it up, and she quickly wipes her eyes again and retreats back into the small crowd of operatives as they scatter some applause into the otherwise silent room.

When Carmen glances over at the two boys, they aren't making any effort to hide their own tears.

"Do you want to leave?" She asks quietly. "I can finish watching it. This might just get harder."

They both shake their heads. On the screen, Mime Bomb steps forward and mimes a flower, placing it on the table with little of his usual theatrics and retreats as well.

"They look convinced so far," Jean Paul says quietly.

Maelstrom is the first of the faculty to speak once the other operatives have finished paying their respects, and Team Red's base goes silent as he moves.

"While I don't want to spoil the evening-" he begins, and in unison Carmen, Jean Paul, Antonio, and Shadowsan (in the other room but listening in) mutter "here we go," all traces of mourning vanishing.

"-I think it must be acknowledged that El Topo and Le Chevre were two operatives whose passion was more often in each other than in their thieving work." Antonio and Jean Paul share a glance as the professor goes on with just the barest touch of disdain. "I would never stoop to say I celebrate their loss- we have lost two fine operatives in their deaths- but I must agree that I hope they are finding their lives after death more suited to the life they wished to live together."

"Cheers, Professor, we are." Antonio laughs wryly. Jean Paul isn't taking it as well, and his fists are clenched in his lap as he stares daggers at Maelstrom.

And then, suddenly-

"Now, you wait just a minute, Gunnar!"

The gasp in the VILE congregation is echoed across the world in San Diego as the group watches Dr. Bellum shoves her way forward, finger pointed directly at Maelstrom.

"You're skirting around your own prejudices, and I'm sick and tired of it. They were not dirty!" There's a glass of some drink in her hand, which seems to have given her a little courage. "They were not wrong!"

"I never said they were, Doctor, please-" Maelstrom hisses, bending with embarrassment towards his fellow faculty member. All five feet of her shoves him backwards and he stumbles, shocked.

"You have made your steady intolerance a part of our Academy's atmosphere for far too long, Gunnar!" Her voice climbs pitches like a roller coaster. "You're too afraid to say that those boys were-" she takes another sip of whatever she's drinking, "-gay as hell!"

"Doctor!" Maelstrom pleads, but Bellum is on a roll now, and the other two Faculty behind her seem to be finding this just as entertaining as Team Red is. Cleo, in particular, is red in the face and biting her lip in a way the three ex-operatives in the room have never seen before.

"Oh my God." Jean Paul stares in disbelief, all traces of anger gone as Antonio wheezes beside him. "This is going to be incredible."

"Those boys died as they lived- together! And I for one want to follow their example. I'd rather- rather live in happiness now than have to stay half hidden like they did here. Now they're up there- dancing to "disco" music and wearing beautiful necklaces like they never could have done while they were alive here!"

Maelstrom is melting into the floor as he tries and fails to do any sort of damage control, and before he can even open his mouth again, Bellum shouts, "We must carry on their legacy in VILE as we continue our work! It should never have taken their deaths to see it!"

With that, she turns, takes the hand of Countess Cleo, and sweeps her into the deepest, most passionate kiss the academy has ever seen. Antonio, in the middle of a sip of water, shoots it out of his nose.

"Shadowsan, get in here!" Carmen shrieks, cackling, as their room erupts into whoops and cheers. Shadowsan enters, sees what's happening, and has to leave again immediately to save face. In the periphery of their hidden camera, the chaos amongst the gathered operatives seems to be an even worse mixture of hilarity and horror. Tigress seems to have passed out cold onto the floor, and Cleo and Bellum are still going.

"Doctor! Countess!" They barely hear Maelstrom shriek over Brunt's roaring laughter. Zack, Ivy, and Player are in hysterics, which is a level more chill than whatever Carmen, Jean Paul, and Antonio are experiencing. Shadowsan isn't even in the room.

"If I got to witness my own funeral, I'm glad this is how it went," Antonio gasps in between howls of laughter as they watch Cleo and Bellum barely surface for air before they go back in, crashing into their memorial table and sending the two's pictures to the ground. Maelstrom has fled the great hall in a fit, and Brunt is literally crying. Someone gasps "disco!" in between laughs behind them. "Look at all the good our death did!"

"Our legacy will be felt around the academy for decades, mon amour!" Jean Paul wheezes in return, planting his own kiss on Antonio's lips. "I think we are in the clear!"

"What was in that drink, Saira?" Cleo gasps on the screen, voice husky, as they come up for air.

"It's plain Pepsi." Bellum responds, and the last thing they see before the camera self-destructs is the two Faculty members going in one more time as the Academy dissolves before their very eyes.

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simcardiac-arrested · 4 months

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no actually I’d like to hear your thoughts on the isat ending

Like i said it felt really tropey and by that i meant that it’s just Everything Good Happens forever and…..that’s it ? like idk we were building up to this huge catharsis sort of thing and then we got to it and it was so sudden and not a good payoff and just kind of nothingburger of an ending . the fact that everyone just forgives siffrin bothers me, or at least the fact that they don’t confront them about the shit they’ve said and done. call me a mental illness villainizer but i think if you’re a fucking asshole and doing the most insensitive things to the people you care about then hey, i think those ppl have a right to fucking tell you off for it. likeeee idk being at your lowest point …… not an excuse …. not feeling it chief ……. like sure the message is to move past your mistakes or whatever but ? that doesn’t mean just getting away with it ??? and i just really don’t understand Why everyone forgives him. honestly at the end of the day the ending is just one problem, the root of which are the characters. everyone feels like trope cardboard cutouts. oh, this is the smart one. this is the smol bean. this is the himbo. and they all care for each other btw. Did u hear that? they all care for each other. we’re not really going to explain to you why these people are so close or what they went through together but just trust me man they’re sooo found famy. like …. okay. i’ve played 30 hours of this game and not once did i buy that any of the characters really cared about each other. like??? why???? You’re telling me everyone super cares about siffrin even though they barely know them?? you’re telling me siffrin cares about everyone sooo much even though he never even bothered to find out their problems before ? Wat ? and this just breaks the ending more because literally whyyy do these people care about him so bad. and then it’s just whyyy does siffrin Have to tell them anything he doesn’t even seem to know them that well. everyone feels like colleagues and Just Friends at best. and so the ending just seems really forced. like it was written by that type of tumblr user who’s always talking about aww why does the found family have to break up after the end of the journey :( which is like fiiiiine. i guess. but u guys know that u have to build up to it right?? you can’t just tell me they’re Family Members(tm) 102829 times and that they super care about each other source: trust. you can’t just do that and then expect me to believe it ….. It feels unearned. the ending feels unearned and i don’ttttt understand what i’m supposed to take away from it . that it’s ok to fuck people up because you’re traumatized and insecure?? that you have to talk about your deepest problems with people you barely know??? i just dont know. Like i said if im being honest the problems with this game’s writing are more than just the ending, it just stands out so much because there’s a lot of build up and then just …… That

#honest to god if you want a Good Example of a story like this just look at dungeon meshi #we start the story from the end of the characters’ journey. they all don’t know each other very well and they’re just working together #hell they don’t even like each other that much. And then as the story develops and they go through their journey we get to see them bond and #get closer and fight and make up and admit they care about each other and still be mad at each other #nobody even gives a fuck about laios at the beginning of the story but by the end of it they’re all willing to die for him. THAT feels #earned. when marcille super fucks up and everyone tells her off for it but still wants to just make sure she’s ok That feels earned #like honest to god i’d take marcille’s arc any day than whatever’s siffrin going on #i just feel like this game suffers from a chronic Tell Dont Show syndrome. we get old over and over again that these characters are close #told*#and that they care about each other. And that’s just ….. not a way to write a story ………#when all the characters exist just to comfort the Whump Main it’s like how am i supposed to get invested. in any of this #u know when the dev replied to someone who was asking them how to write a story and they just said ‘glue your fav tropes together until it #becomes a story’? Well i think that is isat’s main problem. it’s not really a story. it doesn’t really have characters #it’s just a bunch of tropes in a trench coat. And let me tell u that is notttt how you make a story. at all. at all #anyways this was supposed to be about the ending but this story just has so many inherent problems i could critique it forever🤷‍♂️ my badddd #it’s fun as a game and it’s Fine as a story but at the end of the day it just reads like fix-it fanfiction to me #which is not Bad on its own but i wish people would at least recognize how the story is kind of built on sticks #cramswering

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