#and i was going to but now im not bc oof ouchie

[microwave-core]

what if you wanted to write but ended up falling flat on your face and it was bad enough to where, for a brief moment while laying in semi-shock on the ground, you thought you broke your glasses and now your head hurts but you don't want to take anything because you have to chew ibuprofen man that would be fucked up

[carcarrot]

am i allowed to have not great teeth if i just ask really niceys

[mistergoddess]

it's so hard to not bully boomers in youtube comment sections

[grvntld]

days hv been fast on my end again and i rlly hv no idea if i can keep up or if im actually keeping up. anyway, ive been going crazy lately like crazy crazy crazy about life again so here is a bunch of thoughts that hv been drowning me × how am i:

🌻im looking at hmo plans lately bc ive been planning to get one for myself so i could customize it in accordance to what i think i need and want as well as in consideration to my budget

🌻as usual i am all over the place about the hmos as i am reading up abt it and talking to hmo people omg dude there are so many things to consider

🌻also, i realized, technically i already have two insurance policies because the first one, i got from pru and then the second one is from my and my boyfie's joint acct since im the primary holder and our joint account comes with an insurance policy but still here i am thinking of getting another like ??? what is going on ??? why am i like this ???

well, if you really wanna know why hehe it is bc ive always had this thought and feeling that i will die young, that me and my biological mother have the same fate, even though i know that is not how ~death~ works amd i just want everything ironed out for the people that i will be leaving if the time comes

🌻and these past days i just could not stop thinking about how i got my future secured already, but my parents' are still kinda idk since they rlly didnt hv the time to think about theirs as they hv always just been focused on putting food on our table first so ya know now im looking at insurance × investments options for them so that if anything happens and for their retirement, they hv something

🌻with all that happening, my messenger is just filled with hmo and insurance × investments people lol i hv a zoom meeting with an agent to discuss further abt my parents' options hmm im thinking i'll prolly get one for our dad first and then after some time, i'll get one for our mom omg please i hope i'll be able to pull this through

🌻ive actually talked to my siblings about this already and they agreed that we'll share the payments, but of course, since im the eldest and im still the only one working among us, i'll be shouldering all of it for now until they graduate and get jobs and be able to help in paying

🌻i just rlly want my parents to live the best life they could you know

🌻okie enough w hmos and all that blah, now i wanna talk abt how my left boobie has been ouchy ugh ive been wearing a sports bra for most of yesterday for support and i hv slept in one too. i just noticed how the ouchy has subsided since ive worn one but omg i just rlly prefer my boobies free, not caged ugh

🌻oh yeah, ive also been thinking of whether im gonna go for 🍎 or android by december bc my plan is up by the end of this year so that meams new phone for me hehe what do u guys think? kindly hmu if u hv any tots!!!

🌻aside from that, my mood has just been 🥲��🙆‍♀️ lately and it is not fun oof im just so 🤧 and tired of this please give me some stability and peace please

[davidtennantpussytulpa]

i just saw endgame so im gonna TALK about it

first off: endgame good??? to be fair i didnt really have high expectations bc iw was shitty but i actually liked this for the most part

CAROL. BABY. really got me at the beginning with that straight male gaze look but she came back with her hair CUT and like okay!!! miss lesbian!!!! THEN she fuckin showed UP to that funeral in the most bomb ass pantsuit i have EVER seen fucking lesbian RIGHTS!!!!

NEBULA!!! BABY!!! LOVE OF MY LIFE!!! she finally got to play a big part in the movie and its what she deserves!!!! she is fucking accepted!! she is happy!!! nebula my fucking SWEETIEPIE!!!!! MARRY ME!!

bannerhulk..... literally owns all my uwus. they really went out there and had bruce accept both parts of himself and be happy. when the kids were like HULK!!! he wasn’t embarrassed he was like YEAH!!! SAY GREEN!!! and hes so proud and happy like!!! he really deserves that!!! and just seeing the scene of him riding crosslegged in the back of the truck melted my heart.... i love him SO damn much

CAP?? CAPTAIN??? the scene with the hammer!?!??! never in my LIFE have i had the urge to clap or yell in a theater but i really couldnt help it i yelled and everyone was cheering like okay you ARE worthy bitch!!!!

and the end with him??? really so good.... he and peggy really deserve that. now THATS what i call love 1970

valkryie, as always, can fucking GET. IT. thor really named her king huh. strap rights

tony is by no means my favorite but you know what? he was going back and i knew he was gonna see his dad and i got excited. and that shit? good for him honestly

octavia spencer hey baby!!! i didnt know you would be in here but you were great!!!

thor really got to talk to frigga again.... ouchie oof my heart....

i really had to wait through 20 damn movies for clint and nat to actually have a fuckin friendship. they delivered for 10 minutes and i cherish those minutes

i know scotts reunion with his daughter was a touching moment and everything but shskgbgffj the entire scene i was just doing math in my head trying to figure out how old she was

i was so disappointed with loki at first bc i was like??? they had the audacity to pretend that anyone gave a shit abt vision with wanda at the end but thor didnt say anything abt him?? and when he went back he was excited to see his mom and not his brother?? idk i just feel like its out of character for him even with the russo jerkoffs in charge

BUT!! i was like this is SHIT hes really gone but my roommate reminded me he got the tesseract!!! so that shit really happened bc they brought it back to 1970 so he got it in 2012 and my boy. hes still here. sad that ragnarok wont be part of new timeline lokis growth tho

didnt like them being all haha thor fat tho. that shit was bad and everyone in the theater was really laughin like that was the funniest shit they had ever seen. fuck that part

yes i KNOW the russo brothers dont give a shit about women. i know that. BUT.... the part where all the women gather up on the battlefield really was so good for me

i was surprised at the end that cap gave the shield to sam and not bucky bc thats what we all thought. good for sam tho he deserves that

HOWEVER i thought that scene was hella weird with bucky like “go ahead sam...” like he wasnt friends with steve??? like he was really his best friend since childhood and everything and he was like oh you just go like you know you can BOTH go talk to him right???

cap really was just. so sexy in this. the hammer. the lightning. the scene in the elevator where he says heil hydra??? HES SO DAMN SMART AND HOT PLEASE!!! LET ME GET AT AMERICAS ASS!!!

also. i got REAL heated during the time travel talk for two reasons:

one: bruce was acting like he knew the rules of how time travel worked and what they should/shouldnt do. the whole POINT was that they werent sure how it would turn out like HUH

two: they really named off like 30 time travel movies. and they didnt include 13 going on 30. come ON that would have been funny. and you cant tell me that it would be a paradox bc of mark ruffalo bc in those 30 movies and the huge cast of the mcu theres no way there isnt any crossover of actors

and because we all hated it: joe russo you really should choke you want us all to suck your dick bc gAy rEpREseNtATiOn1!!! but your cameo was just bad

also idk i just thought it was really funny during tonys funeral that the kid from iron man 2 or whatever was just like. there. like i dont remember what he looks like i had to think back so hard like who the FUCK is this random dude

and his funeral was also funny bc everyone is dressed normally then it gets to okoye in her bomb ass slit top dress and i was like REALLY GET IT QUEEN!! fucking THEN carol is in her pantsuit and im like YES!!! BE THE FUCKIN HOTTIES AT THIS FUNERAL!!! GET IT GIRLS!!!

okay i think im done for now lmao if you read that all you are entitled to all of my possessions when i die

[dreammutual-remade]

idol!you and lucas

request: please do a bullet scenario about lucas and his gf both being sm idols - anon

word count: 2.6k 

a/n: first of all,,,, this gif hurts me badly, seCOND OF ALL im so sorry for the inactivity !!  I have finals this week and I graduate really soon n ive just been v busy !!! also I had hella writers block trying to finish this ish up but I hope u like it anon !!!!its a lil hard for me to write as an idol just because thats such a Wildt lifestyle but I did my best ily

warnings: cursing n also some crying because god knows all of our boys prolly have during their idol days :(((((((

what’s up butter cup

let’s dive tf in

as a pre-warning thingy i’m making you a singer so i’m very sorry if you can’t sing i can’t either bby

alright so this story begins when you’re not even 16 years old and you audition for a bunch of companies

tbh you didn’t think you were /that/ good at singing or dancing but ???

all the companies wanted you??? you got offers from JYP and SM and Pledis ????? go off queen

we stan

anyways

you decide to go with SM since they produced leGENDS SHINEE

FUCK I LOVE THOSE GUYS

(binch if u went to JYP u literally could have been in TWICE ?!?/&.&. ABSOLUTE LEGENDS UR LOSS THOT)

also because you just think that’ll be best for you ?? idk we don’t judge here (i already did though i’m So Sorry)

on your first day as a trainee you’re in search of the female dorms and you just can’t find them

eventually you run into this,,,, Gang Of Adolescent Boys

they’re wearing dorky ass muscle tees and keep saying shit about “foreign swaggers”

(.... y’all already know who it is sjdkdkd)

and you’re Meek and New and Small so you’re like um, hellowherearethegirlsdormsplease

okay there’s four of them and they’re all fckin huge except for one

the Biggest One with the american accent points you in the right direction and you try to scurry away but end up smacking into the Second Biggest One’s arm because he moved in your way on accident ouchie

“god lucas why don’t you just run the poor girl over”

“hYUNG PLEASE”

“hehehhehe i’m just kiddin”

and you just kind of mumble that it’s fine and go on your way

okay so you train for three yEARS before your debut

and you def come out of your shell alright like you’re Extroverted and whatnot

you still see those boys and even make friends with mark and donghyuck and the Foreign Members

but the entirety of the group you met has debuted except Lucas

you’re not close but you wave and say hi when you see each other

you turn pink everytime from Emotions and also Holding Your Breathe Due To Anxiety

and he was cute years ago but he’s only gotten prettier with age dude

they recently dyed his hair to give him some Blonde Stuff and he looks reaLLY GOOD

LIKE TO THE POINT WHERE U HAVE TROUBLE LOOKING HIM IN THE EYE

but eventually you’re like hey now i’m a grown woman i can handle this giant childish man !!! quit that @ emotions

alright so you debut like, days before him no lie

you’re a solo artist bc idk

red velvet was full 😔🤟

anyways you’ve been filming the video for the past couple weeks and the concept is sort of filmy and shimmery like old sparkly anime water u kno ?

and you’re wearing similar stuff to what ten was wearing in the new heroes mv (BIG OOF) except less warm toned ?

like swishy sort of see through white shirts and spandex underneath

you’re a Beautiful and Skilled dancer so they have u all over the place with this choreo

on the FLOOR on the WALL in the AIR

no joke they had you in a harness doing cool swirly shit in the air this is the stuff of legends my g

but like the inside of SM ? is very cold

if you’re not filming you’re bundled up in a blanket and trying to rub the goosebumps out of your arms and legs

because you have to look all smooth and flawless for filming and those are two things goosies are not

luckily the song wasn’t a huge ballad because it’s rather hard to belt out long ass notes when you’re upside down lmao

anyways, the song is a bop and the mv is beautiful and you are wearing minimal clothing and although these are all nice things but also

RECIPE FOR DISASTER

the filming is almost done thank GOD

you’re taking a break from filming and you go out in the hall in your costume to go get another water bottle because ain’t nobody around to give a pre debut thot a water bottle 🤧🤧

your arms are wrapped around yourself when lucas jogs up behind you and throws his jacket around you??

literally throws it like you made an oof noise

“um ,? thank you that was aggressive”

“i knOw i’m sorry it’s just you are practically naked and it’s Cold in here and also walking behind you i noticed you were Very Exposed sO”

you turn bright red because that means everyone has seen your ass prolly and you duck your head and pull the jacket tighter around yourself

“oh! i’m sorry i mean you look uhh? really good ?? yeah you look good nOT that i was looking super hard or anything or that i uH saw aNything BUt if i did it would look good i’m sure nOT THAT I thInK about that ?$/&/“

and now you’re both blushing very hard but you feel a little better when you see he’s just as flustered as you

you brush your fingers on his forearm to get him to stop staring at the floor and tell him thanks and ask about when he’s debuting

he tells you the mv filming is done since they had to go Real Far Away to do it and get it done ahead of time and that the teasers will be out in three weeks and then the mv release and then its Show Time Baby

you’re excited for him and he’s excited and you debut really soon as well and he’s excited for you and !!!!!

there’s excitement all over the place

he’s smiling so big and his eyes are cute and crinkly and :(((((

you still got a crush on him /sigh/

one of the staff literally yells your name down the hall and you’re like aw shit that’s my cue lol

you leave him with with a lil squeeze of his bicep and you’re BOTH shook

him because ?? was that fLIRTING

you because ?? THAT WAS FLIRTING

also because his biceps are thicc i’m gonna cry

big baby stands there for like 3 mins just shook and with uwus oozing from his pores

you skrt very quickly to avoid the consequences of your actions and get back to filming

okay TIME SKIP

your mv was released and did GOOD AS FUCK

you didn’t hear it from me but lucas + nct boys were seen on vlive jamming the fuck out to your song

you’re backstage like 10 mins from going on and having an absolute panic attack

what if you trip ??? or your voice breaks !!:&::

what if all the reviews say you’re Trash live and that the mv was better since they edited

what if you FLOP AND HAVE NO FANS

NO ONE DOES THE FANCHANTS

FUCK FUXKFUCKFUXKCUDJ

so you do call the king of debuts

mark lee

and you’re like mARK FUCK IM GOING TO CRASH AND BURN PLEAS LLSSE DHELPD ME

he tells you to Calm The Fuck Down and assures you it’ll be fine but it’s not working and mark is but a young boy he don’t know how to deal with FEMALES

you hear some deep ass voice on the other side ask who’s on the phone and mark says your name and then the voice is closer and deMANDING to be given the phone

u already kno it’s our boy yukhei

he can hear you gasping through the phone and having a mental breakdown and immediately makes his voice all low and soft

wow i’m , affected writing this shit

“hey, y/n, listen to me, you’re okay, you’re fine. i promise it’ll be okay.”

“bUT WHAT IF I-“

“you won’t. you’ve worked too hard and practiced too much. i know you i saw you do it. do NOT let all of that go down the drain. you can do this. now get your cute ass out there and take NO SHIT”

“i know but i am, scared”

“don’t be! this is what you love isnt it?”

“i mean,,,, yeah”

“and you want to do this more than anything don’t you?”

“well , yeah”

“then for gods sake don’t be a wimp and do it”

“hey i miss the part of this conversation where you were being nice to me”

“that part’s over babe you need some TOUGH LOVE now please for me and for yourSELF get out there”

“okay.. thanks lucas”

“anything for you, angel”

yOU HANG UP SO QUICK

how dare he

you were all Comforted but then he went on with that angel bullshit

okay long story short you ended the industry dude

all solo artists BOW BEFORE YOU

VOCAL QUEEN

DANCE QUEEN

lucas: shaking because His Angel did so well and you were wearing white and actually looked like an angel

but you don’t see him for the next like twO MONTHS because he’s promoting boss and you’re promoting your single and neither of you are home ever

when you do get a second to yourself you try to send him an encouraging text but

you seldom get a second to yourself :(((

he does the same thing and they’re so sweet :(

“good morning i hope u slept well !!”

“princess don’t forget 2 hydrate”

“i saw ur mnet performance u looked beautiful <333”

this man is practically begging you to wife him up i mean

he’s cute

he’s BIG and WARM

very sweet to you :(

talented and lovely

absolute dweeb

supportive of you even from great distances

BEST BOY UWU

you try to be just as encouraging back because he deserves it UGH

“bub don’t forget to eat i know ur hungry rn”

“!!!!!! you came foR MY LUNGS WITH THAT CENTER DANCE AT THE END BOI”

“why are u sending me messages u need to rest bby :((“

when things calm down though you,, see each other

he doesn’t formally ask you out and you don’t say anything but, youre dating sort of kind of

as idols you’re both still so so busy and you JUST debuted so neither of you are really allowed to date anyways

you settle for little bits of cuddling and secret touches as you pass each other in the hall

you both stand outside of your respective dorms at night to facetime without waking your dorm mates

he desperately wants to go on dates and do Normal Couple things but there’s no time :(

the most affectionate you’ve ever been is when the girl group who shares a dorm with you was out promoting and you had him over and you took a nap together :((((

he Insisted upon being the big spoon and basically wrapped your whole body up with his limbs

pressed a few lil kisses to the back of your neck and your shoulder when he thought you were asleep

you weren’t though and you turned around to kiss him on the cheek and then tuck your face into his neck and pass tf out

he has to leave though because mark texts him and is like YO I KNO UR WITH Y/N AND HER ROOMMATES ARE ON THE WAY HOME

ABORT MISSION DUDE

and that’s pretty much it :(

months pass without much between you even though you’re trying your best

and even though you live in dorms you’re still so lonely especially when you’re traveling because you don’t have any group members

you don’t want to annoy or worry lucas though so you don’t complain

he notices though and late at night he’ll call you while you’re in bed and talk about his day and how he misses you and wishes you were there

and when you get all emo he says he’ll be waiting for you at the airport

(he really does he goes and hides in the bathroom and texts you so you can go in there and TACKLE HIM)

he still calls you angel all the time :((((

god that’s another weakness of mine ??? IM SUCH A WUSS

but it has specifically changed to “my angel”

uwu

your first kiss and first Real Confession happens on the Worst Day Of Your Life

you’re about to go on stage (you’ve released an album since your debut so this is new stuff) when you get a call from your mom ??

she’s crying and tells you your grandma is sick and in the hospital and it’s really bad

immediately you’re barely holding yourself together because that woman half raised you and was the reason you stayed in dance and worked so hard to become who you are today

there are tears streaming down your face already and the makeup team is fluttering around you trying to fix what you’re messing up and it’s bad

you still have to go on though so you go and perform with tears in your eyes and your manager yells at you after for not pulling it together

you go home in tears and then you’re not looking where you’re going and ran straight into a staff who yells at you some more for being some entitled idol brat

originally you weren’t gonna say anything to lucas but, the staff pushed you over the edge and you call him in tears and are incoherent and can barely tell him where you are before you hang up

our boy BURSTS into your room and sees you sitting on the floor with your face buried in your knees and 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 !!

he gathers you in his arms and sits on the bed with you curled up on his lap

he holds you close and rubs a comforting hand up and down your back at the same time as he frantically tries to figure out what’s wrong

“y/n?? baby what’s wrong? angel, please you gotta tell me or i cant help”

“i jjJJUST Got a cALL and my grandMA IS SICK AND THEN I DI D BAD AND DISAPPOINTED EVERYONE AND My mManageR yeYELLED at me and theN I RAN iNtO a staffF meMbEr and he yELled at me too and I JSUT .$:&:&;& i’m sO SORRY u doNT need to deAL WIYH ME you have problems of YouR own and-“

“shhh listen to me i always care about you okay? angel, i want to help you no matter what you know that. also, if you weren’t so distraught i would go beat some SM ass you didn’t deserve to be yelled at :(((( how about we call your mom and check for updates with your grandma and i’ll stay here with you for the night?”

you nod and then reach for your phone while keeping as much physical contact with lucas as possible

he’s the only reason you haven’t reached the Depression Point Of No Return so

we stayin close

you put your mom on speaker and set your phone down before squishing yourself back into his chest and sniffling while the phone rings

your mom answers and you shakily ask for any updates and she tells you not much but your grandma has improved and they think that within a couple weeks she’ll be better

you cry some more and tell her you love them both and you’re so relieved and lucas kisses the crown of your head and is just There For Comforting

once you hang up and you’ve calmed down a little more you back up a little and turn to face him

“hey thank you so much, you didn’t have to come and help me so much but you’ve always been there to make me stop Freaking Out and laugh and i just, love you. yeah that’s what it is. I LOVE YOU I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU, WONG YUKHE-“

he cuts you off by snatching your face in his big warm hands and kissing you right on the lips

he then kisses your nose and your forehead and pulls you back into his lap to tuck you under his chin

“it’s all for you, angel ;)))) i love you more”