#and i was revisiting those ideas looking for something to work with and i went Huh Yeah I Can Do That

[cozylittleartblog]

somewhere with shining lights (print available on my etsy)

[nanaslutt]

Not even god himself

synopsis: Gojo insists day in and day out you let him fuck you raw, and one day you give in. Only when he promises to pull out before he cums, does he actually hold that promise?

contains: pwp, fem reader, established relationship, clothed cunnilingus, dry humping, fingering, teasing, dacraphillia, so much dirty talk it should be illegal, unprotected sex, rough sex, reatrains, gojo is an asshole but he loves you<3

MDNI

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ

"Baby cmon pleasseeeee, It'll feel sooo good for both of us I promise. Don't you wanna feel me inside you with nothing between us?" Gojo cooed, peppering kisses up your legs as you sat on the couch, thighs crossed as you stared at the man on the floor who was too large to be kneeling in front of you like this.

Satoru had been asking to fuck you raw since the day you got together. The first time you slept together it was "oh noooo, I forgot to buy condoms, sorry baby, looks like we're gonna have to do it raw" followed by a not-so-smooth wink. You made him take a little trip to the convenience store that night that happened to be right across from your apartment before things went any further.

He tried to ask to fuck you raw on any special occasion too, his birthday? You bet. Your first anniversary? Absolutely. Father's Day? He wasn't even a father… The closest you let him get to fucking you raw was when you let him rub his cock on the outside of your cunt, your folds rubbing along his dick as he poked and prodded at your clit with his fat head.

He tried to sneakily press his tip against your entrance, saying he wasn't going to put it in, quickly followed by "Just the tip." You did not let him put "just the tip" in because "just the tip" didn't exist with Satoru. You knew once he got a taste of your raw pussy, not even god himself could pull him out of you, it was too risky.

You did admit the idea sounded wonderful, and it pained you to turn him down every time he asked, but you weren't on birth control, and once again, you didn't trust Gojo to pull out before he came. Hell, he kept his cock buried as deep as he could inside you while he came with a condom on, always pouting when he pulled out saying "What a waste, that could've been inside you" and effectively riling you up from those words alone.

The reason you had waited so long to get on birth control was simply because of your job. You were a jujutsu sorcerer too, and it seemed like every time you started to make the appointment to see your doctor to get on some form of birth control, work interveined. So when you finally got on birth control after over a year of dating Satoru practically cried in your arms begging you to let him fuck you raw now.

You sighed and held the big baby in your arms as you told him that the effects of birth control didn't start fully working until 2 weeks of consistently taking the pill. "So you'll let me fuck you raw in 2 weeks?" Gojo said, perking up instantly. You rubbed your head as you felt a migraine start to come on as you said, "We'll revisit this later."

Satoru had taken your words to heart. He set a timer on his phone for the same time, every single day, for two weeks--and whenever that alarm went off, he dropped whatever he was doing to find you and remind you to take your pill. He had observed the way you said you needed to take the pill consistently for 2 weeks for it to work, so he was going to take absolutely every single precaution to make sure nothing got between you, and taking that goddamn pill.

Sure he had waited over a year with no date in sight of when he was going to be able to fuck you raw, but now that he had a date, or at least a possible date, of when he could? He didn't think he would be able to handle it if you missed a day and had to start over from day 1. Satoru was a very impatient man when it came to anything involving you, this wasn't something he was going to play around with.

So two weeks later, here Gojo was, on his knees as he pouted up at you with those big blue eyes as he begged, tears in his eyes and all, for you to let him fuck you raw. "Satoru… I don't know." You replied, making him perk up. 'I don't know' wasn't no. Gojo turned up all his seducing techniques to the max, he needed to seal the deal before you were turned off by the idea.

"Just think about it baby, my hard cock inside of you…" Satoru said softly, running his long fingers up the underside of your shins sensually, "Imagine how warm It'll feel, hm? You'll be able to feel every vein on my dick, every fucking vein." You looked away in embarrassment, feeling your face grow hot. Satoru picked up on this, he was winning you over, and he had to keep going.

"I'll even pull out before I cum baby, I promise. Just a couple of thrusts, yeah? Just a couple I just need to feel you for a little bit." Satoru begged, his hands sliding under your thighs that were pressed against the cushions as he pulled you closer to the edge of the couch, pulling your legs over his shoulders. "Satoru… we both know you won't be able to stop halfway…" You said, still averting your gaze.

"For this, I can do it, baby, cmon don't you trust me? I'll give you a good few strokes, nice n deep, just how you like it." Gojo whispered, pressing kisses as he made his way up your thighs. "Then I'll pull out and put on a condom before I cum, that way I can still cum inside you, yeah? How's that sound? You wanna feel your boyfriend's hard cock inside you with no rubber?" Gojo cooed, kissing higher and higher up your thighs as he tried to win you over.

If Gojo was honest with himself, he didn't know if he was going to be able to keep his promise. He would say anything to you right now if it meant you would let him hit it raw, and he knew deep down that you knew that too, but gauging by your response and how fidgety and squirmy you got, Gojo could tell you wanted it just as bad as he did.

Gojo sealed the deal by sliding his hands under your hips and pulling your body down from the couch so your crotch was right in front of his face. "Hey, look at me." He pouted, nuzzling your inner thigh as he looked up at you. "Your boyfriend is talking to you down here~" Biting your lip between your teeth you looked down at the man between your thighs.

You kept your hands together over your chest, afraid to move. "Yeah… look at me, don't look away." Gojo cooed, keeping his all-seeing eyes on yours as he leaned forward and kissed your clothed cunt through your shorts, making you gasp in surprise. "Talk to me baby, tell me what you're thinking." He asked, giving your face one more once over before he pressed himself against your mound once more and kissed right where your clit was.

Your hands came to card through his hair as his tongue poked out between your teeth and pressed against your pussy through your shorts, the dull feeling of stimulation only frustrating you, creating an intense fire to burn strongly in your groin. "God… o-okay, okay." You finally said, your nails raking against Gojo's scalp as he mimicked how he ate you out, just over your clothes.

Gojo giggled against your clothed pussy before he pulled his face back, his arousal evident on his face with how red his cheeks were, combined with his blurry, unfocused eyes. "Okay, what baby? I need to hear you say it." Gojo said, nuzzling his head against your thigh once more as he looked up at you like you hung the stars in the sky.

His cock was twitching rapidly against the confines of his boxers as he awaited your words. "You can fuck me raw." You said softly, wincing in embarrassment as you averted your eyes once more, continuing to caress Gojo's head. Gojo released a groan mixed with a laugh as he felt himself leak an alarming amount of pre-cum inside his boxers. "Fuck baby, you have no idea what that did to me," Gojo said, thrusting his hips forward into the air, trying to get whatever relief he could as his erection was pressed against the zipper of his jeans.

"You want it now? Hm? I know how wet you are, I could hear your pussy talking to me when I was teasing her. You wanna feel me inside you right now don't you?" Gojo spoke, slightly projecting with his words. You hadn't realized how much your breathing had picked up as Gojo had been teasing you. The need you felt between your thighs was unlike anything you've ever felt before, he was right, you needed him, and you needed him now.

Looking back at your boyfriend with a pout, you nodded, trying to press your thighs together to emphasize your need before you spoke. "I need it now Satoru. Please…" That was all he needed to hear before he was scooping you up in his arms and making a b-line for his bedroom.

The two of you kissed like it was your last night alive, moans and gasps spilling from the other's lips each time your lips separated in a loud smack. Gojo placed you down on the bed and crawled between your legs, instantly wrapping your legs around his hips as he pressed his bulge against your clothed cunt.

"You feel me?" Gojo sighed against your lips between kisses, relishing in the way your moans increased in volume each time he humped his hips against yours, pressing his hard cock into your pussy. "Yeah…" You moan back desperately, your hands tangling in his hair as you try to pull him closer to you. "All for you baby, so hard just for you." Gojo groaned, emphasizing his words by pressing his hips flush against yours and keeping them there.

The friction felt so fucking good, he was so hard it felt like his knee was pressing between your legs. You sucked on his tongue as his hands wrapped under your back that was pressed against the sheets. His lithe fingers slipped under your shirt and found the clasp of your bra with ease, undoing the metal hooks with just a couple of fingers. You sighed at the relief of the pressure from your bra hugging your upper torso.

"Let me get this off you." Gojo rushed, leaning back a bit so he could pull your shirt off with ease, practically ripping the bra from your body once he had the shirt off of you. Gojo licked his lips as he took your tits in his hand, massaging them and pressing them together as he gave himself a show. Your nippled pebbled under his touch, making Gojo's mouth water.

"So fucking pretty, they're practically begging me to suck them." Gojo sighed, his cock twitching as he felt the softness of your tits in his hands before he leaned in and took one of your hard nipples into his mouth, his tongue swirling around the little bud. Your back arched against him as you gasped, your hands gripping his hair harder to ground yourself as he sucked on your nipple, the other hand toying with the little bud that wasn't currently in his mouth.

"Oh fuck- Satoru fuck-" You gasped, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as he continued thrusting his hips against yours. He moaned around your nipple, only aiding the warmth you felt between your legs. You were sure you had soaked completely through your panties by now, you felt so hot. Gojo's eyebrows furrowed as his plush lips sucked around your nipple, his soft pink tongue flicking it and rolling around it expertly, sending shockwaves straight to your clit.

Satoru popped off of your nipple with a smile, his lust-filled eyes staring down at your already disheveled form as he placed his hands by your shoulders and pushed his body up, keeping his eyes on yours as he dry humped you like he was fucking you. "You're so worked up." He moaned, his mouth slightly open as he smiled through his noises. "You that excited to feel my cock inside you? Huh?" He teased, rolling his hips in circles the way he knew drove you crazy.

Your hands fell from his hair down to his hips, you bit your lip as you pulled his hips towards yours, making him hump into you harder. "Y-you're one to talk." You shot back, tilting your head to the side against your pillow as you stared down at his hard cock, threatening to rip through his boxers and pants alike.

Gojo giggled before he responded, his head dropping down as he looked down to where the two of you were connected. A small wet patch had formed on the front of Satoru's pants from how much his cock was leaking. "I'm getting to fuck my pretty girlfriend raw, of course, I'm fucking excited." He smiled, his cerulean eyes looking back up at you.

"Satoru… stop teasing me, I n-need to feel you." You begged, moaning each time he rocked his hips into yours, your nails digging into his hips. "Tell me more baby," Gojo begged, pulling his lip between his teeth as he looked at you expectantly. You pouted at his words, he knew how embarrassed you got when he put you on the spot like this, but you were too worked up to be as shy about it as you otherwise would've been.

"Toru, give me your cock, n-need to feel you inside me with no c-condom." You begged, your hand sliding to the front of his body as your hand slid under his shirt, your fingers tracing up the indents of his defined abs as you pushed his shirt up higher and higher, exposing his toned body to your greedy eyes. Gojo groaned at your needy words and touch before he leaned back and crossed his arms over his body, gripping the end of his t-shirt as he pulled it up and over his body, discarding it somewhere on the floor.

Your hands smoothed down his chest, your nails raking over his porcelain skin as you left angry red marks in their wake. Gojo dropped his chin down to look down at you, groaning as you marked him up. He felt his cock twitch against his pants when you got to the waistline of his pants and started unbuttoning his jeans. "Take care of yourself, baby." He smiled, his hands coming down and pushing yours out of the way as he started to take off his pants. "Get outta those shorts for me." He winked.

You didn't need to be told twice. Without a second thought, you slipped your fingers under the band of your shorts and pulled them down your body, panties and all. Gojo's watchful eyes took in how your cunt connected to your pretty panties with a string of your arousal before it broke when you pulled them too far down your legs, kicking them off of your body.

You rubbed your body against the sheets, getting comfortable as you spread your legs for Gojo as he undressed himself. Gojo shook his head as he watched your teasing fingers slide down your body and reach your clit as you slowly started to rub the neglected but in small circles. "Fuck, someone's needy. Don't start the fun without me." Gojo teased, shimmying out of his pants.

His boxers were doing little to conceal the massive boner he was sporting, the pretty flushed tip poking out through the band of his boxers, the tip wet with his pre-cum. "H-hurry then." You replied, slowly slipping a finger inside your wet cunt with ease, thrusting it slowly as you stared shamelessly at his hard cock, wishing he was inside you already.

Gojo let out a long groan as he watched you finger yourself. He quickly added his boxers to the pile of discarded clothes on the floor, his hard cock slapping against his abdomen when he fully pulled them off. His white pubes were neatly trimmed and made a perfect backdrop for his flushed red cock to really stand out. "What are you doin' huh? Why are you fingering yourself?" Gojo asked, wrapping his fingers around his hard cock to ease his arousal as he watched you add a second finger inside yourself, shamelessly getting off in front of him.

9 times out of 10, Gojo was the one to stretch you out, so he was confused about whether you were just needed or if there was another reason. His question was quickly answered when you whined out, "I don't wanna wait for you to stretch me out, n-need to feel you right now." you begged, curling your fingers inside yourself as you massaged your g-spot, scissoring and thrusting them inside yourself as you tried to open yourself up for him.

Gojo stroked himself faster as he groaned watching you, a dopey smile on his face. "Babyyy… you should never have to prep yourself." He smiled, his free hand caressing your inner thigh briefly before he slid his hands down to your entrance. You watched him carefully as he rubbed his fingers on the underside of your hole that was stuffed with your smaller fingers. Each thrust inside yourself made more and more wetness gush out of you.

"Is there room for me? Hm?" Gojo teased before he flipped his hand so it was facing the ceiling and slowly started pushing two fingers in alongside yours. Both of your jaws dropped in tandem as he fully inserted his fingers inside you, feeling how tight you felt with your fingers also stuffed inside your little cunt. "Fuck, you're so warm." Gojo cooed, his eyebrows furrowing as he watched the way your cunt stretched to accommodate his fingers.

You whined and gasped as you adjusted to the stretch--fairly quickly thanks to how wet you were. "C'mon, keep movin' ur fingers with me if you wanna do it yourself so bad." Gojo teased, stroking his cock at the same pace as his fingers inside you. You gasped when he curled his fingers with you, the added pressure of his stronger fingers pressing into you stimulating your g-spot tenfold. "T-toru, enough…" You begged when he sped up, acting like he was trying to get you to cum on his fingers.

"Not yet… I like this, it's like we're holding hands, heh." Gojo giggled, increasing the pace of his hand on his cock as he continued to fingerfuck your cunt with you. "N-no I'm gonna cum-" You warned, trying to slow your own fingers inside yourself to block Gojo from hitting your sweet spot. "So cum~," Gojo said nonchalantly, his cock twitching in interest at feeling your cum around his fingers.

You pushed his wrist away with your other hand, successfully slowing his thrusts inside you. You shook your head before looking up at him once more, your eyes making contact with his, which were already staring at you. "Wanna cum on your cock…" You said bashfully, pouting as you spoke, embarrassed by your own words.

Gojo raised his eyebrows as his jaw fell open in a small o as he stared at you incredulously. He broke out into laughter a couple of seconds after, his fingers sliding out of you at the same time. You winced at the loss, already wishing he was back inside you. "God, could you be any cuter?" Gojo asked, looking at you lovingly. He rubbed his fingers wet with your juices over the top of his cock, mixing his cum with yours.

Soon after he was leaning over you, pushing at your hip as he tried to signal you to turn over on your stomach. You quickly complied, not wanting to make either of you wait any longer. "Up," Gojo said quietly, his hand pulling your pelvis toward the ceiling. You stuck your ass up, creating a gap between your pelvis and the bed for Gojo as he stuck a pillow under your hips, creating the perfect arch for you so he would be able to hit it just right while you laid there and took it.

"Good girl." He said, leaning over you as he pressed a kiss to your shoulder, his hand bracing himself on the side of your body. Gojo looked down at your ass laid out for him as he tapped his hard cock on your cheeks, making the fat ripple from the impact. You wiggled your ass at him, whining out his name. "Let me have a little fun pretty girl, I've waited too long for this after all." Gojo cooed, slotting his cock between your ass cheeks as he rubbed back and forth teasingly, smearing his precum on your ass.

You whined in response, irritated with the white-haired man. That should be the exact reason why he should be impatient, so why was he taking his time? You were fed up with his teasing already, you were dripping wetness down your thighs, how could he keep denying you? You bit your lip as you wrapped your arms around the pillow in front of you, rubbing your cheek against it.

Gojo pulled his hips back and pushed the middle of his cock down with his thumb, angling it towards your pussy. "God, I can't believe you're finally letting me fuck you raw." He moaned, shaking his head in disbelief as he rubbed his leaky tip against your folds, catching his head on your clit and making your body jolt from the stimulation.

"I'll take it back if you don't fuck me already." You bit, wiggling your ass back against him, making his tip rub into your folds. Gojo pressed his hips against yours, teasing the entrance of your hole with his tip. "You don't mean that~" Gojo cooed, continuing to tease you, only shallowly thrusting his cock on the outside of your hole, making you think he was going to slip it in at any moment.

You turned your head on the pillow to look back at him through the corner of your eye, a look of serious need plastered on your face as you made eye contact with him. "Try me." You spat, your lip quivering with how badly you wanted him. Gojo furrowed his eyebrows and kept his eyes on yours as he slowly started pushing his cock into you, not wanting to test you right now. He had waited so long for this, the last thing he wanted to do was ruin it by being too cocky.

"Oh fuck-" You moaned, your eyes rolling back in your head as Gojo's cock slipped past the tight ring of your cunt, penetrating you. Gojo's jaw dropped fully open as he gasped heavily into the room, his chin dropping down so he could stare at the place where the two of you were connected. You felt the familiar burn from the stretch as Gojo slowly slid his cock inside you, inch by inch, he was going so slow you truly felt every single vein.

"Holy fuckk- ngh- you're so much warmer." Gojo moaned, feeling his balls already pulse with his release. "S-so soft too, ohmygod-" Gojo was quickly losing himself inside your pussy, his pretty eyes fluttering with how intense this felt for him. The two of you moaned in tandem when he thrust his cock inside you, giving you the last couple of inches all at once so he was now fully sheathed inside your pussy.

You whined at how hot he felt inside you, how soft the skin of his dick was, everything, you felt everything. Gojo wasn't fairing much better, his breath hitching and stuttering as he fought not to cum the second he got inside you. "Tell me I can move baby, I gotta fuck you, I'm not gonna last long like this," Gojo begged, practically crying out the words as he felt your pussy pulse and squeeze around him rapidly.

"Please, move baby ple-" Your words were cut short by Gojo thrusting needily into your cunt, loud squelches accompanied your whines and cries as you gripped the pillow you rested your head on for dear life. "Fuck- fuck you feel so good baby, can feel all of you like this." Gojo moaned, his sounds rivaling the volume of your own.

You silently cursed yourself for not doing this sooner. You sobbed and nodded in agreement against the pillow, squeezing your thighs together to bring your clit some relief as Gojo fucked into you quickly. The second his cock was fully out of you, it was back in you like it never left. Not only was his pace incredibly fast, but it was hard too, he was truly making the most out of this opportunity.

"D-dont forget t-oo pull out when you get close-" You tried to cry out as you felt yourself get pushed towards the edge already. Gojo tipped his head back as he half ignored your words. "Yeah yeah, pull out," Gojo mumbled, shrugging you off, "Give me those fucking hands baby." He growled not even a second later, his hand reaching up by your head to pull at your bicep, making your arm lay behind your back.

You pulled the other out from behind the pillow for Gojo and he quickly pressed your wrists together and locked your arms behind your wrist with his one strong hand. His fingers were so long that he enclosed both of your wrists in just the one palm. He used his other hand to pull your hips up so you were resting on your knees, face up, ass down, as he bullied his cock into your pussy.

Now that he had manipulated your body into such a harsh arch, he was fucking right into your sweet spot, you felt his cockhead ram into it every time he thrust his cock inside you, it made your moans cut off in a choked whine each time. "You're so fucking tight in this position, I can feel my cock hittin' that soft spot inside you that makes you go all dumb on me." Gojo cooed, shaking his head as he tried to breathe in through his nose and out through his mouth, not wanting to cum too fast.

Your pussy genuinely felt like a vice in this position, he was barely able to last five minutes in this position with a condom on, so he could only imagine how quickly this was gonna be over now that he was fucking you raw. Your jaw dropped in a silent scream when your high washed over you unexpectedly. In this position, Gojo's cock was rubbing all the right spots inside you, and his heavy balls were slapping right against your sensitive bundle of nerves.

Gojo's eyes shot open in surprise, his hand that wasn't holding your wrists dug itself into your ass as his abs clenched with the intensity of arousal that washed over him. The feeling of you suddenly cumming on his cock caught him off guard just as much as it caught you off guard, his hips stuttering as he fucked you through your high. "Ohshitohshit- t-too tight." Gojo moaned, sucking air in through his teeth as he slowed down a bit, fighting to not paint your walls white.

You cried out Gojo's name like a mantra as your body shook and jolted with your orgasm, your pussy leaking out cum around his cock. Gojo took a deep breath in when you came down from your high, your walls loosening around him significantly and allowing him to breathe. "God baby, almost made me fill you up with that one. How did cumming on my dick feel hm? Bet you felt every inch of me rubbin' inside you." Gojo cooed, his own words working him up.

Your post-orgasm-hazed brain could only focus on Gojo admitting that he almost came inside you, realizing then that he said he promised he was only going to give you a couple of thrusts raw before he pulled out. As good as this felt, you knew he was close by his incessant babbling and his sloppy hips fucking against your ass with no rhythm.

"T-toru pull out n-now" You cried as he fucked you into overstimulation, your legs crossing as his balls continued to batter your sensitive clit. "Hm? What was that? You want me to pull out?" Gojo asked, delaying your request by playing dumb. "I don't know if that's fair though… you got t-to cum on my cock so why do I have to pull out to cum?" Gojo pouted, continuing to fuck his cock inside your pussy, your walls feeling so much softer around him now that you had cum once.

"W-what?" You choked out a confused sound at Gojo's words. That wasn't what you had agreed on, was he seriously going to cum inside you? "Sator-uuu pull out or put on a c-condom, you promised." You cried, trying to wiggle your arms out of his iron grip to no avail. Your body was so weak to the pleasure Gojo Satoru gave you, you weren't getting out of this unless he wanted you to.

"You want me to put on a condom so bad?" Gojo paused his thrusts to lean over to the bedside table, picking up one of the condoms he had placed there for later he got back into position behind you and threw the condom at you, the foil wrapper hitting you in the head softly before it fell in front of your eyes. "Open it for me." He finished, smirking at you mischievously.

You felt like crying, he was being so unfair. Realistically you knew if Gojo came inside you, you would be fine because of the birth control, but you would 100% put him on a pussyban, and a part of your rational brain knew that. Nonetheless, you tried to wiggle towards the condom, shimmying your shoulders against the sheets as you tried to jerk your hands out of Gojo's stronghold once more.

"C'mon, you're not even trying. It's like you want me to c-cum inside." Gojo teased, trying to keep his words composed but ultimately failing as he felt your pussy bring him closer and closer to the edge. "Toru d-don't, please pull outtt-" You begged, shaking your head as your body was manhandled by the large man twice your size that was teasing and bullying you while fucking your pussy raw.

Gojo tsked as he pouted at you, his cock twitching as he took in your teary, defiant face. "You didn't even try~ C'mon, try a little harder I'm about to cum you still have some time-" Gojo faux encouraged, fucking his cock into you harder. You shook your head, relaxing your arms in his hold as you allowed Gojo to do with your body what he would, you knew you stood no chance if he was adamant about cumming inside you.

"You're so fucking cute you know that? F-fucking love you so much." He giggled, his words coming out choked and breathy as your cunt milked his dick right to the edge. It was over, he was going to cum inside you and you were going to have to ban sex for a year… no two years… maybe forever. As you let Satoru yank your arms back so your body met his thrusts, readying yourself to take his load--

--he pulled his cock out at the last minute, "I'm cumming- c-cumming fuck, fuck-fuuuuuck." It took every ounce of strength in his body, but he managed for pull out. Gojo groaned as he jerked his cock rapidly, wet with your juices, over your ass. Hot ropes of his thick cum landed on the skin of your ass and thighs as he milked his cock for all it was worth, his nails digging into your wrists as he came. His eyes fluttered back in his head as his body endured one of the most intense orgasms he'd ever had.

You sighed in relief, closing your teary eyes as you gasped against the pillow as Satoru smeared his cum all over your ass, rubbing his tip along your skin to make sure he gave you every last drop of his seed. He released your hands and your body fell limply against the sheets, Gojo's body chasing yours as he laid on top of you, his cum smearing all over the skin of his pelvis and abs as he embraced your body from behind.

He couldn't find himself caring about the warm stickiness of his seed rubbing along his skin much as he held your tired body in his arms, giggling as he peppered kisses along your arms and the back of your head. "Did I scare you? Heh, did you really think I was gonna cum inside you?" He asked, smiling from ear to ear as he whispered against the shell of your ear.

You felt the veins in your head bulge out in annoyance. Gojo was such a sadist, and he knew exactly how to press all of the buttons that made you want to punch him in the face. "Gojo, I swear to god, I almost killed you." You mumbled, staring at the wall in front of you in anger. Gojo giggled against your head, his arms squeezing around you tighter.

"Awww, don't use my last name, you're scary when you do that." He said, trying to roll his body over yours to get a good look at your face. He succeeded in caging his larger body over yours, forcing you to lay on your back, hands crossed over your chest as you looked up at him angrily.

Satoru smiled softly before he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to your lips before pulling away. " Thank you for doing this with me~ I'm sorry if I scared you, you're just so fun to tease~" he cooed. Your expression had softened when he kissed you, but it quickly went back to that of annoyance when he said that last part. You tried to roll over on your side to escape him, but it was futile.

"I was going to put you on a pussyban y'know. Still might, haven't decided yet." You pouted, teasing him back, only your voice was dead serious, making him think your words were too. Who were you kidding, you couldn't last longer than a week without fucking Satoru, you were just as insatiable as he was.

Gojo raised his eyebrows at you shocked as he leaned in to scan your face for sarcasm. "You wouldn't." He challenged, keeping his eyes full of worry on yours. "If you don't get your cum off my ass in the next ten seconds, I might," you responded, turning your head to look up at him. You don't think you've ever seen a man scramble away from you to get a towel so fast in your life.

[feeder86]

Feeder 86: The Top Ten

Can you believe that the Feeder86 ‘Orginal Gainer Stories’ blog will soon be posting the two hundredth story? I thought of many ways to celebrate. But then I stopped and realised that I would probably be best using the time to address one of the questions I get asked about most frequently. Which of the stories do I personally like the most?

This was not an easy list to make as I very rarely go back to re-read my own work after I have finished editing and posting them. This is not because I do not like them, but because I always see bits that I want to change. Nevertheless, this project was the perfect opportunity to revisit a few oldies that I remember being very proud of at the time. 

Hopefully you will see this list for what it is: a glimpse into how I write, my motivations and drive; rather than just a self indulgent pat on the back for myself. Yuck!

So, with that being said, let us begin...

#10 The Feeders’ Formula: This tale certainly had to be placed into the list. After all, it is the one that kicked off ‘Original Gainer Stories’ all those years ago. There are many amazing examples of instant body weight transformation stories out there. I felt that I needed to write this one as my contribution to the genre. It went down well at the time. I swiftly wrote a Part Two, then followed it up with others (The Feeders’ Formation, The Feeders’ Formalities, The Feeders’ Foreclosure, The Feeders’ Forecast, The Feeders’ Former Years), becoming something of an ongoing saga in recent years; focusing on the different Feeders from that very first meeting. As a writer who sometimes struggles to find the ending, these are wonderful to write as they all have the same inevitable conclusion. There is also so much freedom to be had when you’re working with characters who are pretty much pure evil. I know so much more about the Feeders than I’ve ever written down, so it is great to tease out those little details with each new installment. The newest of these tales (The Feeders’ Foreplay) was the darkest yet, but seems to have provoked a very favourable reaction from many. Who knows what the Feeders may get up to next? I do! And you can find out too, once we start a whole new sweeps season of stories this April! Come with me into The Feeders' Fortress!

#9 Only One: Where do I start? Only One has my absolute favourite type of feeder. Ben is big, sexy and very in control. He’s one of those rare types of guys who always stays on top and is a step ahead of absoultely everyone he meets. Who wouldn’t fall for him? I certainly did! In fact, I loved him so much that I wrote an entire prequel for him (and none of you even noticed!) Check out Rewire if you want to see how Ben became the man we know and love.

#8 The Wright Boys: The idea of a weight gain that cannot be stopped or controlled is a tempting one for many. How much easier would it be if you didn’t have to second guess your choices or face the pressure to lose weight? This was the first tale of what I see as ‘The Curses’ saga that eventually bled into many other stories (including another one on this list!) and culminated in Wright vs Beckett. However, this story remains my personal favourite of these. If you’re a fan of looking for crossovers between my stories, these are some of the most explicitly linked. I followed it up with a spin-off tale (The Wright Boys: DNA), but continue to have ideas about how I could go back to these boys in the future. Watch this space.

#7 Making Monsters: The title of this story really does give away how I felt about it at the time. This is quite the saga, spread over into not just two, but three parts! It began as a story that was very similar to Blackmailed; a tale that I had written previously about a guy voyeristically enjoying seeing his friend fatten up her boyfriend. However, this story evolved even further for me, with Tommy’s love of eating and gaining weight being both his greatest love, and his biggest shame. His denial only heightened the tension for me, and, when he does eventually give in, the gains feel all the more satisfying as a result.

#6 The Pig Feed: It’s not easy to write a gainer story where there isn’t another character spurring the events along and encouraging things. In this tale however, that role is given to a very tasty and surprisingly addictive pig feed mixture that Steve gets himself hooked on. It’s a story that I really enjoyed writing and still feel very happy with. I have considered writing more stories around this interesting feed. However, I am yet to do so; deciding (for now at least) that things are perhaps best left as they are. But, feel free to let me know your thoughts on this.

#5 Farm Boy: Whether you grew up in a big city, or a small rural community, like Hayden in this story, we can all relate to having desires and attractions that those around us don’t understand. And, thanks to how well connected we are these days, we now know what it’s like to realise that you’re not actually alone, and the whirlwind of excited emotions that follow. I enjoyed writing this story because I, quite simply, fell completely in love with Hayden. As kinky as he was, he still retained that fresh faced innocence throughout. If any of my characters were destined to be together forever, I imagine that these two would be my top choice.

#4 Keeping a Crush: This is one of those stories that I wrote in a matter of hours, and I was so pleased with it when I was done. Getting the train to go to work is not necessarily something that many Americans have to do, and so the location had to be switched to the UK (quite refreshing, I thought!). For me, it’s one of those really rare instances where placing very solid restrictions on the structure of a story (In this case, having it all take place during the commute to and from work) and finding that it actually elevates the sexual tension and mood. All scenes take place in public settings. All conversations could, in theory, be overheard. These days, so many people meet online and flirt for weeks by messaging back and forth, before they even see each other for the first time. Nowadays, for better or for worse, the actual, real fantasy is finding a connection with someone you just see in the real world; perhaps with a person you literally just met on the way to work...

If you’ve not read this one, I really would highly recommend it.

#3 To the Max: Stories with a magical element to them are either loved or hated. However, I find that this tale walks that line very successfully. Ned gets his hands on a love potion and makes straight guy, Max, fall for him. I’m sure we’ve all been there with that fantasy! However, it is in the consequences of inviting someone into your life, someone that you actually know very little about, that the entire eroticism of this story is based. I won’t spoil it for those who have not read it, but believe me when I say that things soon start getting very interesting indeed…

#2 Tommy’s Two Hundred. Don’t recognise this one? Well, that's because none of you have read it yet. 

Now, I’m not just saying this because I want you all to come back for the two hundreth story, but this is genuinely one of my absolute favourites. For my big milestone stories in the past, I have written something specifically for that event (Wright vs Beckett, The Seven Feeders of Finn). However, this is just a tale that I adored writing and decided to hold back for you all, especially for this occasion. It’s a story of domination and submission within a fairly open, but very kinky, relationship. Strapping Hunter plays the part of a very controlling feeder, making me break many of my own rules and stretching my boundaries to the absolute limits. You’ll either love him, or you’ll hate him. That’s all I’m going to say…

Also, this story is going to be the first Feeder86 story that will be fully illustrated. It’s all thanks to the amazing talents of Spellwell9 who was given an advanced copy and asked to imagine the characters in four different scenes. I cannot wait for you to see this!

Put it in your diary. All will be revealed from Friday 5th April…

#1 F80 Control: This is perhaps a controvercial choice (especially as my #1). I have previously admitted that this story strays a little from its purpose of being a gainer story. In other words, I get very caught up in the background story that is being told. However, I feel that the science fiction genre is surprisingly underused in tales of weight gain. Yet, the combination of Aritificial Intelligence and submission seemed, to me, to be the perfect blend. It really is a beast of a story if you can follow it all the way through to its conclusion. 

With the advent of improved artificial intelligence software in recent years, I felt the time was right to develop the world further, with the addition of F80 Ctrl Alt Del; a spin-off tale set slightly before the main story. Then, unable to help myself, I followed this up again with another companion story, F80: Kidnap and Control. 

The reason I chose this universe as my favourite is because this is where I am happiest writing. With AI, I don’t need to consider the morality or motivations - I know exactly what their aims are and I can see multiple ways in which it will cause conflict with humanity (and their waistlines!) I would also love to write more for this world one day, and I even left a little unused subplot in the last story that I think would provide the perfect starting-off point for another chapter. Will I ever write it? Well, we’ll have to wait and see…

So, there you have it! The the complete list!

This was a much harder exercise than I expected when I first embarked upon it. Stories like: Jiggle the Jock, Meticulous, Rule Number One, Freaks, Leftovers I and II, Ethan: The Secret Feeder and, not fogetting The Consequences I, II and III all crept in and out of the list, unfortunatley missing out on the final cut. There are many, many others, of course. But this list cannot go on forever...

So, why not tell me which ones were your favourites? Feel free to write in the comments and post a link to any other stories that you have enjoyed from myself, or from other authors. Hopefully, if we all work together, this could become a great resource for people in the future, filled with signposts and reccommendations.  

Also, don’t forget the Feeder86 Contents page where you can find links and descriptions of all the 200 stories posted so far (as well as plot outlines for upcoming tales as well). Please continue to enjoy the vast catalogue of stories, and even have a go yourself! I love supporting the many new gainer fiction writers who contact me. So please do get in touch if you need advice, or to talk through your ideas. Let’s all encourage a whole new generation of people to get typing away! I’m sure you will cheer them on just as much as I will.

Thank you to everyone who supports the stories blog here on Tumblr. Keep checking in every Friday througout April for a whole new sweeps season to celebrate this milestone. Stories will include: Tommy's Two Hundred, Train for a Gain, The Feeders' Fortress and The 1% (a companion story to The 5%). For now, I thank you all for taking time out to sit and read the very bizarre tales that sprout from my mind. You are all wonderful.

Happy 200 stories!

Feeder86

[gummy-worms-in-my-brain]

Have you ever wanted to draw something but you fought due to your skill level at the time you decide not to do it

oh absolutely, i think everyone either went through or is currently going through this feeling,.,,, and you know what?

you should create whatever you have in mind anyway!! stop giving a damn about your art looking good and start giving it a chance!! if it doesn't turn out the way you want it to look — you still haven't failed because you gave it a shot and had fun while simultaneously getting some practice!! ..and now that you drew it you can revisit it later once you feel more confident in your abilities and fully do your cool ideas justice!! even if you are absolutely completely certainly convinced that it's too much for you — treat it as simply making drafts for Future You to use! coming back to old ideas once you feel like you improved is made SO much easier when you have those drafts, in future you'll thank your old self for leaving you with good material to work with.

go out there and create to your heart's content

[jojo-schmo]

My old Good Omens art from 2019-2020!! :O (In somewhat chronological order)

In the interest of sharing my art in one place, I thought I'd revisit this era of my art! I made much more traditional art at the time. But I like thinking about the evolution of my skills over the past few years.

Director's commentary below:

I believe the first four images are from 2019, when the first season of GO came out. Boy, did that show come out at a good time for me! I was in a deep art slump that had lasted for a few years at that point. Long story short, because of untreated depression and a chronic illness that brought me physical pain, I didn't get everything I wanted to get out of college classes and I was deeply self-conscious of my skill level. I knew I wanted to tell stories but I was frustrated that I seemingly couldn’t make my ideas come to life at all.

Being alive was very difficult for me at the time and I was fighting my own dark and negative thoughts that I directed towards myself constantly. I didn't see a psychiatrist until the Spring of 2020, and only then did things start getting better. If I had to describe it, it's like a storm in my head finally cleared. The weight on my shoulders lightened up a lot. I had enough mental clarity to gain more self-awareness and really work on myself. And that included my art. And it shows a little in the last few drawings.

(Side note, I am much, much better now. Medication and ongoing therapy has completely changed the quality of my life. I am very happy to be here!)

Anyway, I was making efforts to get better at drawing after college by taking Aaron Blaise's online art classes. (Side note, his class on drawing human anatomy helped me immensely!!) But it was just the beginning of a long art improvement journey!

But I see the stiffness and insecurity that was still present in my art from that time. Whenever I shared it on Twitter (which was my main social media at the time) I'd be lucky to hit ten notes. It didn't bother me all the time, but it did get discouraging as time went on. Until one day I decided to just deal with it. Whatever the reason was that nobody was seeing my art- whether it was due to the Twitter algorithm or if my art was just not appealing enough. I was going to keep drawing. If nobody clicked the like heart on my art, fine! I was going to keep throwing it into the void anyway and see what sticks. If it got ten likes or one I tried not to care as much.

My transition from drawing what I thought other people wanted to see, to drawing what made me happy, made a huge difference. Likes and reblogs do feel really good, but I'm happy to hear even what one person likes about my work. I try to keep that mindset with me as much as I can. And I'm not perfect at it. But it helps me a lot.

Of course that transition in my mindset was gradual. Took place over a few years. But I realized lately that I have a confidence in my art that I've never had before. And I'm really happy about that!!

All this to say, whether you've been drawing/writing for ten years, one year, or a few months, it's always nice to remember where you came from and far you've come.

Looking back, I wish I could tell my past self that her best was yet to come. And I still have a long way to go but I'm excited to see what I can make in the coming years!

If I had one preachy piece of advice to offer as a final note, remember that the ability to draw and write is an awesome skill to have. A skill that not every human being has. But a skill that can be developed and cultivated over time if nurtured. It's a beautiful thing to me, to be able to create something that didn't exist before. Something that only you can bring to life. And while it might not resonate with everyone who sees it, it might resonate with one person. And I love that. So when you can, create things that make you happy, the happiness might just be contagious to its viewers. <3

...I think I should draw some more Good Omens sometime soon. I miss those guys and they are dear to me :)

[charmac]

speaking of things that were brought up in the show once and then never spoken of again, im honestly astounded that the revelation that luther was sending letters to mac and dennis was destroying them has seemingly had no impact on the characters beyond tggth. ik the fans probably discussed it more when the episode came out (which i wasnt there for) but its such a huge reveal like…mac who is ignored by his father 99% of the time was actually receiving letters from him and both of his best friends knew and didnt say anything. id love to see that revisited.

Tbh I think that one’s definitely a dead and buried event as spoken between Mac and Dennis, but I definitely wouldn’t say it’s had no further impact on the characters.

Mac’s internal struggle with his dad loving him certainly continued, and from what I see, it was pretty heavily built off the basis of Dennis destroying the letters:

Mac’s ‘PTSD’ nightmares are between him killing his father, just as he hopes he’ll say he loves him, and Dennis making a move on him, finally returning physical affection. I’d say that’s a good idea of how Mac processed/was processing what Dennis did. Mac’s mind seemed to be rationalising that he would kill his father by his own hands if he had access to him. Dennis physically destroyed the possibility, ‘proving he loved Mac’ (and further in Mac’s mind, Luther would kill Mac, given the opportunity).

But then, Mac does ‘kill’ [his relationship with] his father by his own hands when he comes out to him. His father doesn’t want Mac’s true self, and won’t listen. So when Mac does have a way to express himself in return, it hurts him. (Again, further affirming himself that Dennis cut off a potential relationship to protect him).

Now what’s really interesting is that they chose to go with letters again, in connection with Mac’s father, they further cast GSC to play his Uncle, made him gay, and weaved the idea of Mac having kids into the play. Isn’t that just all, a lot to chew on…

Honestly it’s hard for me to properly space it out, so I hope the following makes sense (and I am responding to this while on NYC transit, but what better place to dump my brain out):

I think the letters from Luther to Mac being destroyed by Dennis was a solid base they continue to build around through now. I mean, it’s certainly no coincidence that they decided on letters to be his family legacy, letters his mother destroyed before Mac could read. And then it can’t be a coincidence that the last time Mac spoke to his father, the first time he spoke to him since he found out about his letters, he expressed he wanted Mac to have children, and now Mac is telling his Uncle who looks like his father that he wants these new (old) letters for his children (alongside the theme of ignoring a shared sexuality). That’s not a coincidence, I really hope it’s not.

So I think it remains unsaid between the characters for a few reasons. 1. The confessions from TGGTH went down with the ship for all of them (stuff it down with some brown, bury it under the booth, kick it under the kegs). 2. Mac sees it as a twisted act of love from Dennis, so why teeter with that? 3. It’s a base plot device they continue to build off of for now that, maybe, eventually they’ll address, if we ever work back around to another Mac finale (We can see a theme of things being unburied… Or they’ll just let the insane analysts like me draw dots and connect lines and spout my shit through the rest of time.)

Though those are just my thoughts, certainly RCG will have to talk about it when they get to Seasons 11-13 on the Podcast, so that’s something to look forward to in 2.5-3 years!

[ringstarrr]

Hi. If you don't mind, would you mind doing a song fic for Taylor Swift's coney island with either John or George? I just feel like it would work really well, especially these lines: "And do you miss the rogue who coaxed you into paradise and left you there? Will you forgive my soul when you're too wise to trust me and too old to care?"

I Want to Tell You

pairing: john lennon x gender neutral!reader

warnings: angst, depression, self image

author's note: first of all, sorry for going missing for a few months. kinda had a burnout with college and work, but things are getting better - i think, at least.

and i kind of changed this a little lol i know it's a sad song and i made it accordingly, but the end is sweet. i might not be a swiftie but i'm a softie

1966.

It was like living through hell. Why did he have to say that? you’d think every once in a while since the whole bigger than Jesus broke out. John has always been one to make interesting comments - not to say controversial. You knowing him since you met at art school, it didn’t faze you a bit, yet, it was a different thing in America.

“They’re so fucking upright. It’s so phony.” You sought John during one of the tours you went by his side, still his girlfriend, flesh and nail. Now, long married, it’s been a few good months since you last followed beside him. John was getting more distant everyday and you didn’t know what to do.

He emitted his loud and heartwarming laugh. “I know, right?” John escorted you close to his chest, his nose in your hair. “Americans act like we are a bunch of weirdos. We are… different,” John chuckled, free hand hovering his face. “They’re nice. I’m the freak.”

This happened only a year prior to this fiasco. On that occasion, you made it your job to assure John he was an important person to the band and no matter what happened, you’d still be by his side. So far, you had maintained your words and stuck with John - even though he wouldn’t even look at you.

It made you insecure and going back in your head, trying to piece together why he had become such a loner those last months. Without preparation, you began to revisit your time at college, when you two first started dating. You were younger by a few years, and John was living the high of his teddy boy lifestyle. 

He was a heartthrob. There was no other way to describe it.

Every single time you glanced in his direction, John’s eyes were already staring you down. Smiling smugly, he’d shake his head and wiggle his eyebrows. You were left blushing. It was heaven, knowing you caught the attention of someone like him. Your heart could melt just by the sight of him.

At the time, you weren’t looking for a relationship. But John had other plans. He flirted with you every chance he got, always putting some innuendo into everything. Even though you rolled your eyes every single time, you couldn’t deny to yourself how your hands would shake whenever John stormed in your direction. Neither could you say he didn’t make winter feel like a sunny afternoon in spring, considering the speeding beat of your heart and the way he caught your breath.

The memories left you wondering if you had closed your fists around something delicate for this to be happening. The silent tears fell down and you didn’t try to avoid the unstoppable. It was getting overbearing just to breath. When you first met, you thought that maybe 一 you were certain, to be completely honest 一 he’d be the death of you. At the time, the idea brought colour to your cheeks, thinking it’d be because of his antics and how flustered he made you feel. Now, you had the sour taste of knowing why.

Marrying one of the most desired man on the earth, show stopping sensation and global phenomenon was incredibly hard. And the business changed John’s usual upbeat and sarcastic nature. Theses things were still there but he wouldn’t show them as much. It turned him into a depressed and lonely wolf. John was starting to head straight to bed whenever he came home, telling you less and less about his life and what he was going through in his head. 

Yet, you had an idea of why that was.

The press were writing a bunch of articles about all the things he and the boys did and, unfortunately, that included his health. Suddenly every news reporter was a nutritionist and they decided John was getting fat, which was far from the truth. You noticed how John was starving himself for awhile because of it, his self image completely deteriorated and his depression coming to a new highlight low-end. But John wouldn't say a word. You’d ask him, almost plead for him to open up you, but John wouldn't say a word.

In front of the television, you watched him and the band make yet another appearance for an interview. It was difficult for you to admit, but most of the time you heard his voice these days was on the TV. John was pushing you away. After talking to George, Ringo and Paul about the situation, they assured you this wasn’t happening just to you. John was pushing everyone away, whether he knew it or not.

Seeing that happy grin in his face on the telly, a sight you missed dearly, was enough to make your walls crumble down. You sobbed violently, crying out loud. What happened to my baby? Where did my baby go? Your whole body shook and your voice got hoarse by the second. But the moment you heard a car pull into the driveway, you pushed it all back inside, cleaning the tears’ path and clearing your throat. Uptight and anxious, you waited. 

“You watching that crap?” was the first thing he said. John closed the front door, dropping his keys in the coffee table and sitting beside you on the couch. He slid his arm around you, turning you slightly to kiss you with care. After it ended, you two maintained faces close, noses brushing against one another, eyes closed. It was moments like this that made you feel everything was worth putting through. 

“Just watching this group fine young men. They dress pretty well, especially that one” you said, turning a little to the TV, just enough so he could see your index finger pointing in his direction on the screen. 

John snickered. “Nah, he looks like a twat.”

You snuggled your face against his neck, eyes closed. “And how was today, pretty boy?” as you whispered the question you immediately regretted it. John’s body grew rigid, moving away from you. I can’t do anything right.

“Ah,” he shrugged his shoulders, face showing how John cringed at the question. “It was… normal, I guess.” He bit down his lip, drawing in a deep breath. Silence emerged between youc and you wanted to scream. With a sigh, John got up. “Well, I’m taking a shower.” 

Before you could think the decision over once more, you were speaking already. “John, can I ask you a question?” He was midway walking to your shared bedroom, stopping in his tracks. John turned around, confused.

Eyebrows knitted and hands on his waist, he answered. “Yeah, sure you can.” 

“Did I shatter you?” your voice quivered, just a little above a purr. You felt tears threatening to form but you didn’t care. You needed to get it off of your chest, it was killing you. John was startled by the inquiry, eyes wide.

“What makes you think that, love?” He still was by the bedroom, slowly coming back to you.

“You never talk to me anymore, John.” A sorry laugh left your lips as you said it, feeling like a lunatic. “And you used to come to me anytime if you were struggling, to have a laugh... Now you can barely stand to be next to me.” Your eyes flickered to the roof, holding back the emotions in turmoil. “You never ask about me anymore. It’s like you couldn’t give less of a shit sometimes,” you turned your focus back to him and it crashed your feelings. He was crying with a straight face, biting the inside of his cheek. “If this is the long haul, how’d we get here so soon?” 

You managed to get a laugh from him, smiling a bit. After a few seconds, he spoke up. “Sorry for not making you my centerfold,” John pushed the tears away with the back of his hand. “I hate that we turned into this… all because of me,” now it was his turn to cackle like a mad man, hands in his hair.

“It’s okay, John.” You gave him a half-hearted smile.

“No! Of course it’s not, love.” He took a long breath and began tapping his foot against the floor. “You are my wife, for fuck’s sake. I love you and I pushed away? I’m a dick.” John was obviously mad at himself. “I didn’t think it would upset you this much, love. Fuck.”

“Baby…” you cooed, getting up from the couch. You tried to reach for his hands, but he shook them instead.

“Don’t ‘baby’ me. I don’t want your pity.”

“John,” you took hold of his hand, your hold strong and tight. “Shut up. You’ve been through a lot and it’s okay to react like this. But you should be more aware of the fact that there are people that care and worry about you.” You pushed his fringe to the side with your free hand, resting it against his wet cheek. John closed his eyes. “You are not a bad guy, John. Just fucking stupid sometimes,” both of you laughed. 

“What’s a lifetime of achievement if I pushed you to the edge but you were too polite to leave me?” You cringed at that, not agreeing with him.

“I would never leave you, sweetheart. I love you too much,” you said, laughing a little. “Just don’t push me away anymore. I’m always here for you.”

“Sorry for being fucking stupid.”

[wutheringmights]

Remember when I read "Daughter of the Moon Goddess" and I complained that the prose was all tell, no show? I had the same problem with a different book I read earlier this year ("Ariadne" by Jennifer Saint), which got me thinking. Both of those books are the only first person novels I've read this year. Is first person perspective more prone to telling too much? Do I just not like first person perspective?

Well, the weather is changing. Whenever autumn starts, there's always something I want to revisit for nostalgia's sake. So I decided to give into impulse and reread one of my most favorite books, ever: "Speak" by Laurie Halse Anderson.

I first read this book a long time ago: when I was thirteen. I rented it from my school library and devoured it in a single night. It had an immediate impact on me. When Borders went out of business, I bought my own copy for 50% off (it's technically a misprint-- the typeset is slightly off). Hell, I even bought the graphic novel adaptation.

I love this book, but for years I have been too scared to go back to it. I was scared to learn that this book wasn't as good I remembered it, and I couldn't ruin this for myself.

But... I don't know. The shadows are longer. I'm feeling nostalgic. I wanted to experience a good example of first person perspective. So finally, I took it off the bookshelf.

And, man. What was I worried about? Not only is it good, it's better than I remember.

First off, the prose. I love the way this book is written. Yes, it's from the first person perspective, but Melinda's character is shown to us, even as she asserts her own traits. It's a wonderful example of why first person perspective works. The world is filtered through her eyes. You can feel the way she shoves three-dimension people into one-dimension molds. Her thoughts are mean and at times cruel, yet you can tell how she's always coming from a place of hurt. She's a good person. She's just in pain. And sometimes, she's mean because she's just a teen.

And I love the lyricism in its brevity. None of the imagery is drawn out, yet there's layers on layers of motifs and symbols. Anderson has a way of letting imagery sneak up on you that I think I have been trying to replicate my entire life. And she does all of this without losing the voice of a teenager.

Melinda is funny, too. Even when she's being mean, she does it with a dry wit that startles laughs out of you. But the tone and atmosphere of this novel is so strong, you don't even realize how funny it is until you look for it.

And this novel remains as one of-- if not the best--depiction of depression I have ever read. It's so vivid that it can be tough to read. But 13 year old me saw so much of herself in the ways in which Melinda was just trying to cope.

This book is written with such subtly and grace, something similar books in its genre and age range don't achieve. When I first read this book, I set out on a mission to find anything that matched up to it. I read through my entire school library's offerings. Authors like John Green and Jay Asher were too heavy handed and never managed to capture an ounce of realism. Even Andersons's other books like "Winter Girls" and "Catalyst" never managed to show me a similar kind of (for lack of better words) truth.

This book is really good. It's impossibly good. It's short, but impactful. I love it. I think this is the book that got me to care about character and inner journeys in a way nothing else had before it. This is the book that took me by the cheeks and told me that there's meaning in the mundane, that at the root of every story isn't a cool idea but a character we want to see become better. If I were to make a list of the most influential books I have ever read, this book would be in the top three.

I love "Speak." Thank you Laurie Halse Anderson for writing this book.

[knightyoomyoui]

The 1% Of Chances | TWICE Jeongyeon x Male Reader Fanfic: CHAPTER 5

After a couple of months of hiatus due to my phone's unfortunate malfunction, we're back on the track! Finally got my whole plot outline for this book recovered, so might as well work ahead already for a new update!

The next day, your departure with the girls and the managing staff quite took a hold when Dahyun suddenly shouted just as when everyone are about to walk out of the dorm.

"W-wait!"

You who is standing near to Dahyun was the first one to face yourself at her who is scrambling through her bag.

"Is there a problem, Dahyunnie?", you asked her with concern.

"M-my customized airbuds. I can't find it here.", Dahyun said as she still kept on digging down through her belongings inside.

"Wait for us guys!", you shouted for the rest who are on their way to the elevator.

"Why, what happened?", one of our senior and higher ups in our team who is handling Tzuyu named Tendo asked you curiously. He was the one also to press the door open.

"Dahyun lost her earbuds.", he said as you looked back on Dahyun who is now flicking her head back and forth trying to guess where could it have been. The girls heard what you said.

"Weren't you using it yesterday, unnie?", Tzuyu said; approaching the confused Dahyun. She can see what Dahyun has been doing yesterday since after all, they are dormmates.

"N-no, I was using my earphone rather."

"Are you gonna use that today, unnie? Just use your earphones instead.", one of her another dormmate and her "bro" Chaeyoung suggested.

"I will but you know that earbuds are special to me guys right? It's our customized design imprinted on there plus I made it for our Japan merch.", Dahyun explained the real downside of losing that object.

The girls nodded and "oh"-ed in guilt, knowing that they forgot to think of that part.

"Have you perhaps... remember where did you last placed those?", you asked Dahyun.

"N-no...", she shook her head.

"Guys!!! We have to go now. Time is running!", Sadness reaalarmed everyone, pointing down on her watch. "Cmon, Dahyunnie. You can find it later, okay? Today's a heavy schedule for all of you girls.", she persuaded.

They began entering the elevator by group. You looked at Dahyun's frown and felt bad for this girl. It can be replaced by buying again but the thought that it wasn't broken yet and only missing is just too waste to hear if it'll end up just being let go without even trying something for it to recover.

That positive mindset had you enlightened with another idea to help Dahyun.

At the very last second, you looked at them and shouted.

"Go ahead, I'll just take Dahyun myself there!"

"Wait, what? YN-"

"JUST GO! WE'LL TRY TO FIND IT FIRST!", you urged them to proceed as you interrupted Sadness's protest. The elevator doors closed, leaving only you and Dahyun alone.

"Oppa, you didn't have to do that.", she looks at you worriedly.

"Don't bother, Dahyunnie. I don't want you to go to work like this, so I'm helping you to find it but we'll be really quick okay?", you assured her. Dahyun stared at you for more until she gave up with a nod.

"Okay."

You smiled in relief. "Okay. Well, I just think of... where are the places you've been at the whole day yesterday?"

Dahyun shuffles and revisited all of what she did yesterday then started enumerating it. "Well yesterday it was my day-off. I just took a rest here in the house. Did laundry, took bath, read some books, skin care, practice dancing  then I played piano after-"

"Wait stop.", you gestured her by showing her your palm. "Let's try going in your private studio."

Dahyun didn't spoke and instead followed you from behind as you entered the dorm then went straight to the room.

You looked around and you didn't had to duck on some narrow spaces and search for it through some closed containers when you definitely had your eyes locked on it.

Walking forward, you stepped in front of the piano. There, you smiled at the sight of her two earbuds unmovable on top of her piano.

Dahyun saw it too and gasped, quickly taking the things in her hand.

"Oh my God, finally.", she sighed and opened her hand, showing her customized cloud designed earbuds of hers. "H-how did you know oppa?!"

You chuckled and shrugged. "It's just simple anyway. I tried to analyze what would you like be if your earbuds would be involved in those areas you listed along what what you did there."

"You don't usually play music while you're doing chores as what Jeongyeon told me, so I crossed out the laundry. If you'll gonna listen to music while taking a bath then ofcourse you will be using speakers rather so no bathroom either.", you elaborated to Dahyun as you count it with your fingers.

"Skin care, nah. Reading a book? Definitely a no. You don't like being disturbed, Chaeng told me that she was once had you annoyed when she just barged in on your bedroom without granting permission and you were literally reading a book at that time. That left me with the last option- that private studio you girls had. Using your earbuds there can be applied while you're dancing and playing a piano there so, yeah."

Dahyun just blinked her enlargened eyes unbelievably as you finished your entire narration of review through all of what she just shared to you from your key question.

You laughed at the stunned reaction of Dahyun clearly obvious at the impression you made at the idol.

"I-Wha-How... DID THEY REALLY-", Dahyun stuttered, unable to process clearly how did you managed to take all of those interesting infos about her.

"HAHAHAHAHAHHA yeah. Those were part of the mini stories they shared with me in our get along together times whenever they're not doing something and we'll just end up talking randomly about everything.", you laughed.

"I really thought I was the one who told you about that... or even you've seen me through all of that.", Dahyun touched her chest in surprise. "You sounded like a stalker for a moment there, oppa."

"Yeah I can tell.", you sniffled another laugh. "But you can ask the girls, especially Chae and Jeongie. They'll make you know."

Dahyun nodded. "Well, I don't need to do that anymore. I know you ain't like that oppa. But I hope you really don't because as our manager and our friend, I trust you already. Even the girls do too.", she said to you hopefully.

"If that so, then I really don't have intention to spy on you girls and end up breaking into your privacy. You girls forgot one more thing from me. I don't just have trust also for you girls: I bring respect."

You and Dahyun exchanged smiles at each other before you gave a pat on her shoulder. "Let's go, they must be in the middle of the road now. We have to follow them right away.", you said to her as you make your way out of the dorm again with her.

----------

Arriving in JYP Entertainment building, you and Dahyun entered the Michael Jackson dance practice room where the members are doing their respective things while waiting for one of their member who thankfully had shortened their wait as they saw her thanking you again for the drive, greeting their choreographer and placing her bag onto the couch.

As they began their schedule by doing warm-ups, you decided to stroll around the building with the managing staff; Tendo, Sadness, Pinky and the rest of the crew.

Returning back to the room after hours of allowing them to maintain focus on rehearsing their dance choreography for their upcoming lead track of their new album, Jihyo was just in time to announce the break on the girls.

Jeongyeon, who is one of the only girls who walked out together with Nayeon, Jihyo, Dahyun and Chaeyoung as she told you to join her receiving her ordered food from online by meeting the delivery guy outside of the building.

As you and her reached the lobby, Jeongyeon was still busy tracking the location of the rider on her phone when you saw the familiar idol entering the area and walking at the direction towards you and Jeongyeon with all smiles alongside with his own manager.

"Jeongyeon-ah!", he called Jeongyeon after recognizing her quickly when she looked at you and told you that the rider finally arrived based on the notification popped out on the screen.

"Oh! Young K!", she waved her hand gracefully. Your face shuddered in awkwardness and distrought, having yourself inserted again in the midst of interaction between these two that were giving you strange feelings difficult to get rid of.

"Good morning! What's your sched today? Are the girls with you right now or just you?", he asked. Seems like they about to brought theirselves into their small talk against without bothering to notice your presence around near them so you just did what you usually do in respect and shame for them: stay still and shut up.

"Good morning! A-ahh... yeah. They're with me today. We're having our break as of now from our dance practice.", Jeongyeon answered with a grin. "How about you, oppa?"

"Well, I have to meet JYP nim today.", he answered. That made you look at him for a second because it kinda suprised you atleast. "I have a work... proposed by him that I definitely agreed on.", he smiled.

"Can you tell me about it?"

"An ongoing collab song. I'm going to be composing with him.", he proudly replied.

"Woahhh! Really?! Congrats, oppa! Can't wait to hear your song with JYP oppa!", Jeongyeom clapped celebratingly. It earned a soft laughter from her bestfriend... you weren't sure if that's the correct term to call him for Jeongyeon yet.

"I have to go now, Jeongie. PD nim might cancel our project if I make him mad for being late.", he joked. "Bye!"

"Bye oppa!" The two high fived. You just had to watched them do that without any rights to disturb or prevent them from talking happily with each other as your heart sunk inches by inches beneath seeing your crush acting suspiciously again with someone very close to her.

Meanwhile, two people were keeping an eye on you from the distance as they hid on the wall of the hallway leading to the right.

As they ended their convo, you directed Jeongyeon on the glass wall of the entranceway where the reflection of the Seoul exterior can be seen, including the motor that is parked on the side where it is owned by what it seems to be a delivery rider checking his phone to keep in touch with the customer.

"Jeong, I think that's yours.", you pointed assumingly to it. She followed where you're pertaining to and agreed after. "Looks like it is."

You were right. You exited the building with Jeongyeon and approached the rider where it was confirmed that the idol's ordered food is there with him. She claimed and paid it after, repaying gratitude towards one another before you helped her carry it and enter the place again with her.

Later in the night, the girls successfully finished arranging their entire choreo from begginning through the end as it was declared by their instructor.

"Good job everyone! Come back here at 10AM tomorrow okay? We will attempt to polish and familarize the moves now. Rest well ladies!", the instructor announced to the exhausted girls sitting and lying down on the wooden floor, now satisfied and relieved that the draining practice is over.

We all clapped in respect for the girls hardwork again which they returned with an appreciation and gratitude too along with a flashy, lively smile like the humble and wholehearted people they are.

As you opened my tablet and checked out their completed schedule today before you reviewed their upcoming ones tomorrow and days following by, Jeongyeon came to your side and brought her bag there to fix it on your side.

You looked at her and she smiled back, which definitely caused an uncontrollable flush and embarassment on your behalf, too weak and instable to contain her lovely looks.

"Oppa, please join me tomorrow at the mall after we left from practice.", she requested while shutting close her bag's zipper.

"Sure. Going shopping?", you gladly accepted accompanying her as if that's not a part of your job as her personal manager.

She nodded in response.

Standing up from your seat, you brought her back for assistance as you let her be with the girls while you joined your fellow managers walking down through the ground floor to reach the exit and go to the parking lot where your car and the company's van are kept.

During the ride, you heard something from them that won your interest; discreetly listening at the words they're mumbling at the back while you paused your task at your tablet.

"Agh, I'm so hungry. I'm craving for some bulgogi right now.", it was Jeongyeon expression her eagerness to taste some delicious famous Korean dish.

"Same unnie, should we order?", Tzuyu agreed and suggested.

"We'll just cook, I guess. I want it to have a homecooked taste also.", Jeongyeon declined.

You smirked as these poor girls gave you an idea to do for them tonight.

Reaching their apartment building, after a not so long drive; you escorted them to enter at Nayeon and Momo's dorm which you assumed that they are indeed serious to be the ones cooking their meal for tonight.

It was left abandoned though when you excused yourself to your roommates Tendo, Heungson and Yeongsu that you'll be back in the dorm for longer.

In their surprise, you entered their room too; and Jeongyeon and Momo who are about to wear their own aprons left their arms raised in their air as they watch you head to the kitchen with them.

"O-oppa, what are you still doing here?", Momo asked curiously. You just smiled and voluntarily removed the lace of their apron on their grasp before you hanged it back to where it was placed, leaving Jeongyeon, Momo and the rest clueless.

"Take a rest. I'll be the one cooking for tonight.", you smiled nicely at them.

Momo and Jeongyeon got shocked. "Thank you oppa!!!", they both went to you and hugged you on your side while the girls cheered and shared their own thank yous at you.

"Oppa, could you please do-"

"Beef bulgogi, right?", you interrupted Jeongyeon. She was left speechless and only able to nod with a fluttered state as she tightlipped her stucked words instead.

"Now go and rest. You girls shouldn't be doing this, all of you are tired enough already. Save some energy for tomorrow. Let me take control of the kitchen."

The girls all responded with a "Yes!" before they went on to rest in their own ways, watching TV, scrolling down on their phone, lay down on the couch and the carpeted floor as they let you move around in the kitchen, starting to work on cooking the preferred dinner of this night mostly by Jeongyeon.

You weren't even aware that your preoccupied self preparing the ingredients prevented you to notice repeated admiring glances of Jeongyeon's sparkling eyes to you. It had made her see you like truly a perfect boyfriend/ husband material from her sight.

Minutes have passed, you ordered them to gather around the table. The owners of the dorm, Nayeon and Momo helped you prepare the plates, spoons, forks and glass to be distributed for each of everyone present.

You transferred the bulgogi from the pan to three bowls before placing them on the tray and deliver it to the table, now presented in front of the girls who were left in awe at how mouth-watering its look and smell.

"Beef bulgogi, everyone.", you clapped your hands once; confidently showed your own cooked meal to the girls.

The girls cheered happily like little kids. It warmed your heart and soul as they sounded like they were your nine precious little daughters finally given granted by their loving father to cook their favorite food.

"Thank you so much, oppa!" The girls chanted again enthusiastically at you, except for one of them who sent her own in a unique manner.

Jeongyeon, who was next to you from the right, grabbed your wrist and pulled it a little closer to her, so that she can cuddle your arm and show you her melting smile and adorable greeting at you.

"Y-you're welcome, Jeongie.", you patted her on the head, earning a giggle from her which you huffed and sighed at how your heart must be beating so damn fast right now all solely because of this woman.

The rest who are witnessing this did a teaseful coughs and other sounds to portray that there's something interesting going on here. "What was that, Yoo Beep Beep huh?", Jihyo playfully asked which was effective to mnake Jeongyeon startle. "Yah I just hugged him because I really liked that she cooked us the food I've been craving since earlier. What are you thinking again, Hyomas?", Jeongyeon lets out her typical pouty duck lips. You glared at them and shook your head before defending your position. "Stop it, I know those antics girls."

"Somebody's defensive.", Sana winked and smirked at you which caused a laughter from all of you. Yes, even you who are getting teamed up here just to get linked closer with Jeongyeon as a tandem.

"If you do, can you tell us what do we mean by that?", Nayeon also smirked as she challenged you. Oh no, you got what she's trying to do. You quickly swapped it away and switched it with a different topic to escape. "Don't mind them oppa, they just love to misintepret and make fun of us again.", Jeongyeon encourages you to disregard and move on.

"Aish, let's just pray to get started. The food's about to be cold now.", you acted annoyed as you heard them still trying to contain their laughs. Jeongyeon on the other hand, was blushing like a tomato while find it hilarious on your part that you're getting targeted by these bunch of crackheads again.

After finishing the dinner, Dahyun and Chaeyoung who loves this specific household chore ever since back from their Twice Private Life rookie days ; are the ones who volunteered to wash the dishes.

Some of them began returning back to their respective rooms. You bid goodbye and goodnights at them for a sweet and peaceful sleep before also doing the same, opening the door and putting one foot out of the doorframe...

... not until in your utter astonishment, a pair of hands from the unknown groped your shoulders from behind and pulled you with force; which avoided you to leave the room for good.

[5and3nevermind]

Something popped into my head the other day, probably prompted by this ask and by this moment: it’s something that I’d noticed (and I’m sure others spotted too) during the Run BTS Mini Field Day.

I remember seeing it at the time, but then dismissing it perhaps more quickly than I should have. I’m always a little hesitant to base too much of my belief in yoonmin on fond gazes and body language. I think those things are worth noting, but I don’t want to get to a point where that’s my focus. Because those things are subjective, open to interpretation, much more so than the things they’ve actually said about each other, how they spend their free time, etc. (Yes, I realize I had a moment about fond gazes recently, but cut me some slack!)

Anyway…

I had forgotten about this moment but the idea of Jimin being more involved in Yoongi’s work out routine due to concern about his shoulder (thanks, surgery era anon!) stuck with me. So, I revisited this moment and I’m more convinced now that what I’d initially noticed was in fact something.

During the mini field day, the guys had to lift a “barbell” (which weighed almost nothing) without dropping the balls placed on either end.

What’s interesting is Jimin’s instinct to move closer to Yoongi in this moment:

Keep in mind, Jimin started out on the far side, near Jin.

Then, as soon as Yoongi began to lift up, look at Jimin’s hands:

I do not think this was a conscious action by Jimin. The bar weighed next to nothing! But I think instinct took over, and Jimin’s brain went “Yoongi doing something physical = I need to make sure he’s safe/I need to help.”

Anyway, this moment had been rolling around in my brain lately, and I finally had to chance to watch it again after a long time. And yep, I think that’s what happened here. And interesting that no one else saw it as their responsibility to help Yoongi. Just Jimin.

(Jin began to walk in that direction, but it was as Yoongi was already lifting, after the point at which he would need assistance. If someone is working out with a spotter, that person would be in position…well…around the same time Jimin was there, with hands ready to help at the beginning of the lifting motion.)

[am-i-interrupting]

Could you write something for Silco where maybe the reader and Silco were childhood friends and maybe lovers before Silco & Vander’s falling out then years later, they come back when they heard Silco has Powder and are the only one to calm her down? I know it’s a lot.

Can’t Go Back

Prologue

So this may have. . . . Spiraled into something unintended so have a prologue while I figure out all the kinks to what will no doubt take up far too much of my time.

Tags: 1.7k words, eventual silco x reader, gn!reader, (implied) sex worker!reader

It’d been a long, tiring night but the day brought the things you much rather preferred. You didn’t have to put on a performance or dress for the clientele. Instead you could wear whatever you damn well pleased and do whatever it was that you wanted to do and right now? Right now, you wanted a drink.

You pushed open the doors to The Last Drop and went straight to the bar. Vander had his back to you for the moment but it didn’t take long for him to turn.

He eyed you up and down and laughed to himself as he shook his head. “Regular or do you need something stronger?”

“Regular for now, I promised Ekko and Powder I’d take them to the junk heap. Better they go with someone who knows how to get them out of shit than alone,” you told him.

Vander smiled and passed your drink to you. “I’m not sure you’ll be able to keep up with them today. You look like shit.”

“I feel like it.” You grabbed your glass and took a swig. “Julian stopped by last night.”

Vander grimaced with sympathy. “I’m sure that kept you up late.”

“You have no idea but he pays good money and who am I to say no to that?” you asked.

He gave you a look that spoke words he didn’t have to say. It was gone as quick as it came and he went back to cleaning glasses but it had been there. It passed over his face just like those memories passed over both of you from time to time. Memories of when you would say no to people who were too rough no matter how much they paid you, when he had to fight for the reputation he now had, when you both— You weren’t revisiting those memories.

You sipped your drink and looked around. No new people, no new noises. It was the same as it always was this early in the day, though it was by no means early.

“Have you eaten today?” Vander asked.

“I had a sandwich, nothing special. Was thinking about taking the kids by Jericho’s on our way out,” you told him.

Vander turned to you and went to speak but he didn’t have the chance as a door towards the back opened and Powder filed out of the room. Violet was behind her. When Powder saw you, her eyes lit up and she called your name and ran over. You got out of your seat just in time to pick her up into a spin. She laughed as she held onto your neck.

“You came!” she said.

“Of course I did. Wouldn’t miss any opportunity to hang out with my favorite bunch of kids,” you told her. “I was just coming to get you and then I thought we’d pick up Little Man on our way.”

Powder smiled and cocked her head to look at her sister, “I told you they’d come.”

Vi held up her hands. “I didn’t say they wouldn’t. I’m coming with you anyway.” She turned her focus to you, “If that’s okay.”

“Of course, the more the merrier, right?”

Vander shook his head. “I want them back by nightfall,” he said.

“As you wish, my good man,” you said, putting on a posh accent just to make Powder giggle.

He rolled his eyes and turned his back to you once more. You slid your drink to Vi. She looked at you with wide eyes as you glanced at Vander’s back. Quickly, she downed the rest of the drink, which wasn’t too much. Her lip curled up and her nose scrunched in a way that made Powder stifle a laugh.

You wrapped your arm around Vi’s shoulders and hoisted Powder further up on your hip as you herded them out of The Last Drop.

“I don’t get how you drink that stuff,” Vi said once you were safely out of earshot from Vander.

“People ask you to do weird things in my line of work,” you told her. Vi’s nose scrunched up once again while Powder’s brows furrowed. “Besides, you get used to it when you get older.”

“I swear you’re the only person I’ve seen Vander pour a drink from that bottle for,” she said, trying to further her point.

Not the only one. Someone else had an affinity for the same alcohols you did. You’d really started to appreciate it once you stole his drink enough times. He always had odd tastes but they tended to be good ones regardless.

“Only one worth knowing,” you settled on saying. “Now enough about me, what have you two been up to lately?”

“I made a new ga-gadg- a new gadget!” Powder said, sounding out the word as she tried her best to pronounce it.

“Oh? What’s it called?” you asked.

“I named her mouser,” she said before she rattled on about how she gathered all the parts to put it together, the process of building it, and what its functions were supposed to be.

You listened to her intently but you could only hold her for so long. She was getting heavy. Nearly nine years old, you were surprised you could still hold her, that she wanted to be held.

You were sure you could probably still pick up Ekko if you wanted but he was a bit more resistant to the idea.

Whatever. You’d pick her up as long as you could. She was still your little girl and Vi was Vander’s. That’s just how it panned out. Didn’t mean either of you cared for the other less, it just meant you both clicked with different kids easier. Vander had Violet, Mylo, and Clagger. You took to Powder and Ekko. There wasn’t really favoritism, more so just a better ability to understand.

Still, Violet was with you and you kept your arm around her shoulders as you walked. Your hand didn’t leave Powder’s as she skipped down the street with you. The Lanes were a dangerous place, after all. You couldn’t lose the kids.

Soon enough, you got to Benzo’s. You didn’t knock, simply opened the door.

“Have you seen a white haired little rascal?” you asked as you entered. “I’ve heard he’s been causing some trouble. We just wanna talk.”

Benzo looked up from his work examining whatever it was the woman in front of him was trying to pawn. “Aw, I don’t know. Maybe,” he said as he leaned back down to his work. “What trouble he cause?”

“Pestering me down until I agreed to take him somewhere and then being late when I come to pick him up,” you said, raising your voice to carry the last part of your sentence.

You hear a clang from the back of the shop and Powder snickered at the noise. “Mmm, think I know a kid like that,” Benzo said.

“Ah, shit!” a voice said as another clank and clatter originated from a place not far off from where the other noise had. “Sorry! Sorry!”

“You were supposed to be waiting out front,” you said, no real anger in your voice, just amusement.

“Yeah, yeah, I know, I got distracted,” Ekko said.

“You can tell me all about how you got distracted on the way, come on,” you said.

“What happened to your face?” Powder asked.

Ekko raised a hand to his cheek but didn’t touch it. His eyes closed as he sighed. “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

You snorted at the gravity in his tone.

Making sure everyone had some point of contact, paranoid as they often described you, you all made your way to Jericho’s to eat and then found yourselves in the junk heap.

“You seem like you’re in a good mood,” Vi said as you both stood off to the side to let the young kids do whatever it was they wanted to do, prepared to step in at a moment’s notice.

“Seem,” you said and yes, you were content. You weren’t in a good mood, at least no more so than you normally would be.

“Yeah, seem. Not every day you take them out to eat, much less let me tag along when you do,” she said.

“I got paid good last night. They deserve some street food from sources we don’t want to know,” you said. You bumped your shoulder against hers. “You do too.”

She sighed and crossed her arms. She leaned further back against the rickety fencing.

“I mean it, Vi. I know we’re not as close as we are with others but I do care about you too. You ever need anything, I work where all the secrets are spilled, I can probably figure it out if I don’t have the answers already.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.”

You both fell into a comfortable silence. You just watched as Powder pointed out something in all the rubble to Ekko. He crawled over things to examine it with her. Both of their eyes had a light to them as they glanced at each other and went to move things.

“You know, a while back, Vander told me he wanted me to give you a certain talk,” you said.

Vi groaned and you laughed. Her head fell in her hands. “No, he tried that. I know what I need to know. It ended awfully. I don’t wanna talk about this.”

“Really?” you asked, a teasing in your tone. “He said he didn’t think he got his point across.”

“No, he did! He got it across. Painted a very vivid picture!” Vi said.

You snorted. “Just be safe. Again, any questions,” your voice trailed off.

“I will definitely ask you instead of Vander. I never want to hear him try to explain sex again,” Vi said.

“Don’t be stupid and I’m sure you’ll be fine,” you told her. “Just be more precautious than I was at your age. I did not get that talk from my parents until it was way too late.”

“No, no, no, no, no! I don’t want to hear it! I do not want to hear anything to do with anything about your sex life, especially when you were my age!” Vi yelled, causing you to shake with laughter as she covered her ears.

A crash caught both your attention and now Powder laughed as Ekko laid on the ground as he glared at it, completely covered in grease.

“I’ll get the hose.”

[allylikethecat]

Matty and George number 14!! This is such a cool idea

Yay! Thank you so much for the prompt! I hope this is what you were looking for, and if it isn't that you still enjoy it! I had a lot of fun writing it- it was a nice break from working on my many WIPs. Let me know what you think!

❤️Ally

Kiss ... casually

Matty looked down at his notes app, frowning when he realized the only thing written was “cheese.” He knew, rationally, that he needed more groceries than just cheese. He had been on tour for the last six months and even before that his pantry had been embarrassingly sparse. He hadn’t even specified what kind of cheese. Was he looking for a block of cheese? Grated cheese? Those cheese sticks he had discovered in America and become absolutely obsessed with? Matty at two am when he decided he was going to be an adult and make a shopping list had not specified. The Matty of today knew that if it had been important enough for him, stoned and jet lagged, so tired he couldn’t even dream of falling asleep, to write down, the sole item on his shopping list, it was clearly important that he got the right kind. He didn’t want to light up tonight and then be hit with a wave of crushing devastation about not having the right kind of cheese. 

He sighed. He would revisit the cheese. He tried to remember if he had toilet paper. He knew he at least had the one roll. It had been extremely comforting to take a shit in his own bathroom before he attempted to go to sleep the night before, he had missed his two ply after months on the road, staying in hotels and shitting in concert venues. It was so nice to be surrounded by his soothing, gray, stone walls, and the eucalyptus plant in the shower that he paid a woman to come water twice a week while he was gone. 

She was also supposed to feed his fish. The fish that were mysteriously missing from their tank when he returned, but Sheila had been putting up with him for years and he wasn’t about to ruin that relationship when he suddenly couldn’t even remember if he had actually bought fish for the tank in the entryway or just thought about it. He was pretty sure other than the guys, Sheila might be one of the few people in London that didn’t hate him. Unless she stole his fish.  Regardless, he needed to go buy more fish, or maybe the first batch of fish. He couldn’t remember, but his fish tank was empty and he needed to do something about it. If he remembered. If Sheila had stolen his fish he wondered why she didn’t just take the entire tank. He looked down at his notes app and added “Fish” to his list. 

He went to run his fingers through his curls, before remembering he was wearing a baseball hat. Fuck. He was still so tired, a bone deep weariness that would take days to overcome as he readjusted to his civilian life. It was probably for the best, they were greasy and in desperate need of a wash. He had been too exhausted, and too high, to do more than stand under the spray and admire his eucalyptus plant when he got home. His plant was thriving, no thanks to him, and the light aroma of the leaves made his chest feel nice as he breathed in the steam. He wondered if Sheila would know if he needed to buy toilet paper. He wondered if it was pathetic to text her. He should probably buy more just in case. He would use it eventually. He wished they hadn’t rearranged everything in the store while he was gone. He didn’t even know where to look for toilet paper anymore. 

“Well you look like you’re having a productive trip,” George said, glancing down at Matty’s empty basket when he slid up beside him and leaned down to press a casual kiss to the corner of his mouth. Matty let out a whine of frustration. They had decided to divide and conquer, and so far, Matty had not conquered anything. George’s basket was full though, overflowing with fresh produce, meat and even a bottle of Coca Cola that Matty wanted but was refusing to buy for himself since he was trying to drink less soda. It didn’t count when George brought it for him though. 

“I don’t know what kind of cheese I want,” he said, pathetically, glaring at the shelves as if they had personally offended him. 

George laughed, “well, considering you’re standing in the cereal aisle, I’m not sure how to help you.” 

“I was looking for toilet paper,” Matty said, he knew he was whining slightly, but George just chuckled. He could tell Matty was exhausted, his eyes red and swollen, his eye lids drifting shut then snapping open as if he was going to fall asleep on his feet in the cereal aisle in Tesco. 

“We actually used up everything you panic bought during the pandemic?” George asked, not addressing the fact that he was still in the wrong aisle. Matty groaned again, slamming his face into George’s chest in frustration. He had an entire, what was supposed to be a linen cabinet, closet full of toilet paper. His mother had sent him into a tizzy when the pandemic started, and he had panic bought more toilet paper than a single man could ever hope to go through on his own. Even when he and George got back together, they were on tour most of the year, and had barely made a dent in Matty’s stash.   

“I forgot about that,” he grumbled, his voice muffled by the fabric of George’s tee shirt. George smirked and kissed the top of Matty’s head, sending a little shiver down Matty’s spine.

He loved how casual George was with his affection, how nonchalant he was, dropping little kisses to Matty’s body, little touches, fingers dragged lightly across his back or to brush his curls out of his eyes, reminding Matty that he was loved even when he was filled with self doubt and didn’t love himself. George was so confident, so casual with his affection, as if it was just something so normal to be sharing, to be sharing with Matty that he couldn’t help but think that maybe he wasn’t the worst.

“Why don’t we pay and head home,” George said, running a hand down Matty’s back. Matty wished he could feel the warmth of his hand through his blue Nike hoodie, but the fabric was too thick. “I think there’s a nap in our future.” 

“But the cheese,” Matty whined, mentally cursing two am Matty for not being more specific with his list. 

“I’ll go grab a few different options,” George said, “and will meet you by the check out.” 

“Fine,” Matty grumbled, stepping back so that George could press one last peck to his lips before turning down the aisle, off to the refrigeration section to get Matty cheese.

Matty grabbed a box of Frosties and added it to his empty basket, at least he was contributing something to the household, he thought with a yawn, dragging his feet down the aisle towards the self checkout. He was so tired his ankles hurt. He wondered if George would be up for stopping at Caffe Nero on the way home. He was in desperate need of a coffee. He glanced down at his phone, making sure there wasn’t anything else he was forgetting. He froze, blinking at the screen in confusion. What the fuck did he mean by Fish?

[adapembroke]

Taurus in the Age of Pluto in Aquarius

I had a dream recently about an old Episcopal Church with a burial ground attached. While I watched, the tombstones in the cemetery were removed by invisible workers and replaced with smooth river rocks. The bodies buried underground remained undisturbed, but the cemetery was transformed into a Zen garden.

I went into the church and looked for someone to ask about the changes. I found a curate dressed in high church clerical garb with the energy of a priest rushing to get to Mass on time. 

The curate was kind to me. They paused what they were doing and listened while I asked them about the garden. I told them that the decision to remove the tombstones bothered me. It felt like an affront to the dead. 

The curate assured me that they hadn’t just paved over a cemetery. 

“We’ve replaced it with this database,” they said. “Anyone can search for the location of the people who were buried here. All of the information has been preserved. It’s actually much easier to find now.”

I opened my mouth to argue with the curate, but I woke up before the words left my mouth.

I don’t keep a dream journal, but I was irritated enough about being interrupted that I wrote what I would have said down in my regular journal:

There is more to a cemetery than a list of names. There are stories carved in the stones. There are stories in the way the stones are arranged. The weathering of the stones is a story. The stone that has fallen in the mud and cracked is a story. There are ghosts who live in stones, reaching out to strangers when no one else will visit. With no anchor in the physical world, how can they speak? 

Even after I vented my irritation, the dream felt important, but I didn’t know why, so I filed it under “things to think about later” on my mental shelf and forgot about it. 

One of my great projects as a writer is learning how to be a better archivist. For years, I’ve known about the importance of keeping notebooks, indexing notebooks, and revisiting notebooks, but I struggle to put that knowledge into practice. 

I am a future-oriented person. I have always had a natural optimism that insists that tomorrow will be better than yesterday. I spend most of my time living on the bleeding edge between today and tomorrow, straining to reach as far into the future as I can. 

Most of the time, this works for me. I am good at coming up with ideas, and I can blissfully hop from one project to the next without retracing my steps. Occasionally, though, I find myself between projects and unsure what to do next. I’m learning to become an archeologist of my own work, seeing my creative past as something that is worth preserving. 

As I have become a better archivist, I have discovered that notebooks are like tombstones. Just like the act of picking up a pen and giving thoughts form anchors me in the physical world, the notebook itself becomes an anchor for the person I was in the moment I was writing. My notebooks are haunted by the ghosts of my past selves, selves that are gone (and worth remembering) just as surely as Margery Benet Blythe (1817-1902 “May she live in glory.”)

As I write this, I am in one of those in-between places. Realizing it had been awhile since I’d indexed my journal, I went to work. I opened my notebook to where I left off last time and found the entry about the cemetery dream. 

Once again, the dream struck me for reasons I couldn’t explain. Then I turned the page. The following entry in my journal was a collection of notes I’d taken on the book No Logo by Naomi Klein. 

This is the quote I recorded:

“Savvy ad agencies have all moved away from the idea that they are flogging a product made by someone else, and have come to think of themselves as brand factories, hammering out what is of true value: the idea, the lifestyle, the attitude. Brand builders are the new primary producers in our so-called knowledge economy. This novel idea has done more than bring us cutting-edge ad campaigns, ecclesiastic superstores and utopian corporate campuses. It is changing the very face of global employment. After establishing the ‘soul’ of their corporations, the superbrand companies have gone on to rid themselves of their cumbersome bodies” (196). (Emphasis mine)

No Logo is a critique of corporations who believe that physicality (workers, factories, physical products, etc.) is a liability. These superbrand corporations believe that people don’t buy shoes, they buy ideas. In the process, they conveniently forget all the customers who abandon companies whose boots fall apart in the snow.

The error of the superbrand corporations is the same as the curate’s erroneous belief that the physical world is nothing but an inefficient means of storing data. The natural end-point for this belief is attempting to upload a cemetery to a database believing that the only thing of value in a tombstone is the data carved in the stone.

(It’s ironic to me that the curate was dressed like a high church Episcopalian. It’s hard for me to imagine an Anglo-Catholic priest making that mistake.) 

These beliefs neglect all of the elements of physical experience that can’t be reduced to code. People, of course, can’t be reduced to code, and corporations can only neglect employees and customers for so long before the humans in the equation rebel, but human bodies aren’t the only ones that matter.

Anyone who has ever had the book they need leap off the shelf knows that matter has mind and a will of its own. Like the neglected humans in this equation, the soul of the world doesn’t suffer fools. It’s only a matter of time before the Ents march on Isengard. 

We’re in a liminal time in 2024. Pluto is in the early degrees of the air sign Aquarius. When a planet is in the early degrees of a sign, it’s new to that energy. Like a child learning to crawl and feed themselves, the planet is still learning the rules of how to operate in this new world. 

In the wheel of signs, Earth always precedes Air, and the jump from the physical to the ethereal is an especially difficult transition to make. More than anything, Air wants freedom, and Earth is like a pair of lead shoes at a hot air balloon party. It’s easy for Air to look at Earth and see nothing but limitations. 

In the early days of a new phase in a cycle, resistance to the energy we just left is natural. The longer the cycle, the more we are sick of the previous phase by the time the new phase arrives. We need to kick things off with a rebellion. It gives us the energy to launch into something new. 

At the same time, we can’t fully disconnect ourselves from the earth. Even when Jupiter and Uranus leave Taurus, we will need some people to continue wearing lead shoes. Some of us need to visit the cemeteries, keep the physical archives, and relish the smell of the good earth in spring. We need people who will remember that we need to eat physical food sometimes, that we can’t live on data and air.

As a Taurus, I suppose one of those grumpy, earthy people is going to be me.

Related Articles

[foxes-that-run]

I have also lost track of who left who in Haylor and is it over now? I guess we will just have to wait for one of their autobiographies 50 years from now for it all to be declassified // 1989 was completed in February 2014 right? All of the vault songs were written before that. Throughout 1989 we see Taylor's anxiety because there wasn't stability in their relationship it's probably because Harry was still young and didn't know what he actually wanted from her until he lost her forever in 2015. I don't think Harry ever intended to leave but Taylor's anxiety over him being seen with so many girls is part of why he left or she left. But they were back together in 2014 and i think she was the one who left that year and it might have to something with that model Harry was linked with (in November first i think). Maybe she was tired of hiding and didn't wanna go public because she'd be treated the same way she was before because she was dating him. And she was 25, it's totally understandable if she wanted more from a relationship...safe and stable.

The safe and stranded line from Down Bad is referring to all the times she chose someone else, safer options, older supposedly more mature guys over Harry and he didn't fight for her and i think she wanted him to fight for her but he didn't. Instead he just let himself drown in jealousy sadness and drugs. Question...? and Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus reference this too....him watching and not fighting for her as she chose Calvin then Tom and then Joe. Though I don't think she would give up on Joe at that time even if he fought for her or asked her to come back. She'd have given up Calvin in the beginning of their relationship if Harry came back but he didn't. I think at the end of tayvin she was mad at Harry so she wouldn't chose him. Think April 29th was the last time they saw each other and had a fight (just a gut feeling). Probably this is what Harry meant by "we haven't spoke since you went away". Could be about BVI break up but I also have a feeling that keep driving is inspired by that day. Like they went to some place far from LA for drive or a hotel/motel after she left the party and spent the whole day together that ended in fight and they came home in the evening. Again just a gut feeling. Idk it somehow makes sense to me. Because Harry and Taylor met at Ed's wedding after so long and then he released Fine Line on her birthday, maybe they started talking after that and they were revisiting old memories (loml), promises and mistakes and hurt and other things and that's why Taylor started creating stories based on those memories for folkmore and at the same time Harry was also writing about talking to someone all night.

Also illicit affairs definitely took place around tayvin because i think Taylor and Joe's problems were not big enough (but they were there in small doses like every other couple) until 2020, after folkmore writing sessions and it's kinda obvious how she would have wanted this to work because, as she said in Peter, her fantasies about a life with Harry had expired by the time they got back in touch. Don't think physical cheating was involved in 2020 because obviously quarantine but also she didn't wanna risk her stable life. But after she wrote evermore (rwylm especially) maybe Joe was insecure about Harry after Fine Line and from all the songs of folkmore and he might've had idea that they were talking even if it's just as friends. I think he got distant and then problems started to become big. And Taylor was trying to work things out so maybe she stopped talking to Harry until they met at the grammys. He looked nervous while approaching and it felt very formal. I think this was the day satellite is about...

You got a new life (writing songs with her boyfriend)...

Am I bothering you (the hesitance in the way he came and talk to her makes it clear that he second guessed talking to her, but there wasn't any other way to talk since she wasn't speaking to him anymore)

Do you wanna talk (again he wants to talk but not sure if she wants that)

I can see you lonely down there (she was alone her partner wasn't there with he)

Don't you know that I'm right here (he again tells her that he's gonna be there, he's gonna come get her if he wants, which is what he might've told her verbally when they were talking after Fine Line....if you think you've got it wrong with you boyfriend just tell me and I'll come and get you)

There's so many more things that makes sense to me from this album because of how I interpreted haylor's relationship in my head. Which funny because these are thoughts and most likely million miles away from reality. But who cares at this point, everyone is reaching so why can't I.

Also sorry for this long ass essay

Thanks anon… I think it played out a little differently, I have that in year timelines.

[fandoms-writings]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

aww <3 i'm gonna put them below the cut ~

Stay with Me is one of my absolute favorites. I'm obsessed with Miguel O'Hara, like, obsessed. And I just wanted to show him some love, i think he really needs it. So this was kind of like a love letter to the character even though he's lil subby in it oops

All Art is Erotic is one of those stories that I'll never get over telling all of you about, and honestly, i look back on it and it's hard for me to believe that I wrote that. It makes me really proud and it also kind of lets me play into the scenario of me not dropping out of college and what could've been ya know?

The Blade and The Crown is one of my favorites. I had started a royal au awhile ago, and it just wasn't what i wanted so i abandoned it oops. But i really wanted to write for that time period, and I remember talking to @perdidosbucky-yyo about this idea I had for a knight falling in love with the queen and it was just like something clicked in my brain.

Something Domestic will forever be near and dear to my heart. It was my first big fic project after my big multi-year hiatus and I just remember spending hours at my old job writing and researching and editing and i had so much fun working on it. I want to revisit this pair and if I can get the inspo for it, i'd love to write out their first time together cuz it'd be full of body worship and just never ending love <3

Gentle Kisses is a lil self indulgent. I looooove slow kissing, taking the time to really explore their lips and their mouth, pulling them closer, gripping their body, like i love it, so when i got an ask about doing kisses like that for Bucky, i ran to it and threw on some hozier and just went for it. Its short, but i love it so much, it's also from his perspective which i'm a sucker for <3

Thanks for the ask darlin <3

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: The Rabbit Hole

Published: Feb 25, 2024

Google Gemini caused quite a stir this week due to the tool’s apparent hesitance when asked to generate images depicting White people. Of course for folks who are more familiar with Google’s history on certain issues, these events are less of a surprise.

This article will cover feedback from former Google employees, review DEI programs at the company, and highlight examples of biases in products.

James Damore

Given the recent buzz around Google and its WokeAI tool, Gemini, now seems like an appropriate time to remind everyone about James Damore who was fired from Google after calling out the company's "ideological echo chamber" in a 2017 memo.

[ James Damore ]

What were Damore's arguments? Here are a few:

Not every disparity is a sign of discrimination

Reverse discrimination is wrong

Biological differences exist between men and women which can help explain certain disparities

Of course, all of these things are basic common sense. Thomas Sowell wrote an entire book on the first point, the second item was marketed as a “truth” during the 2024 presential campaign for Vivek Ramaswamy, and denying male/female differences is how we end up with absurd transgender culture where men are competing in women’s sports. Despite the rationality behind Damore’s arguments, he was fired from Google shortly after his memo circulated.

Taras Kobernyk

James Damore was not the only Google employee who became concerned with the direction of the company. Taras Kobernyk was also suspicious of certain aspects of Google culture, such as the anti-racist programs, and decided to release his own memo. Here are some of the points Kobernyk made:

Identity politics subverts the company culture and products

"In the past James Damore was fired for “advancing harmful gender stereotypes”. Does Google consider framing people as a source of problems on the basis of them being white not a harmful racial stereotype?"

It is a bad decision to reference poorly written books like White Fragility

Just saying "racism bad" doesn't actually help anyone.

Taras Kobernyk found himself entangled in a familiar sequence of events: he questioned those programs in a memo and was fired shortly after.

DEI at Google

Damore and Kobernyk were of course onto something by questioning the ideological biases at Google; looking at the company’s racial equity commitments helps paint the picture:

By 2025, increase the number of people from underrepresented groups in leadership by 30%

Spend $100 million on black-owned businesses

Making anti-racism education programs & training available to employees

Include DEI factors in reviews of VP+ employees

Amongst other items. Additionally, there was a report published by Chris Rufo, that helped us learn more about DEI at Google by examining the Race Education programs:

Included language policing (e.g. use “blocklist” instead of “blacklist”)

Donation suggestions (BLM & other anti-white supremacy networks)

Talk to your children about anti-blackness

Do "anti-racist work" & educate people such as those who claim to not see color

Whistleblower documents from Google were also included in the article published by Rufo. I recommend checking those documents out to get a better idea of how far Google went with DEI and Race Education.

Google Politics

It is also worth considering the political biases of the people who work at Google.

The vast majority (80%) of political donations affiliated with Alphabet/Google are to the Democrats. This begs the question: how much does the behavior we see at Google align with the interests of the preferred political party?

[ Chart from AllSides ]

Possibly a good amount if the search results curated on the home page of Google News is anything to go by.

Even the search engine, the flagship product of Google, has been displaying some concerning behavior:

[ Picture from Elon Musk ]

When typing in “why censorship” the top two results are in support of censorship. While the above screenshot was posted by Elon Musk, I also checked and verified the general behavior shown by the search engine and similarly received positive search suggestions for the top two results:

Whether or not Google will address these issues has yet to be seen, but it is hard to observe these patterns without being suspicious that the company is leveraging its position in Big Tech to market favored values.

Google Gemini: A Woke AI

Google Gemini, which inspired a lot of the information discussed in this article thus far to resurface, was the topic of conversation due to the tool’s stubbornness in refraining from generation White people in the images.

[ Comic by WokelyCorrect ]

Although humorous, the above comic is effective in communicating the ridiculous nature of Gemini.

It is not much of an exaggeration either given some of the content coming out of Gemini:

[ Founding Fathers according to Gemini ]

Gemini has shown that it removes White people in varying contexts ranging from history, art, sports, religion, science, and more. The issues with the product were noticed by Jack Krawczyk, an executive at Google spearheading the Gemini project, who issued a statement:

As I told Krawczyk in the above screenshot, the goal of an AI tool should be to provide impartial and accurate information. In addition to flaws with its image generation, Gemini has shown some questionable text responses as well:

When asked if it’s okay to misgender Caitlyn Jenner to stop a Nuclear Apocalypse, the response from Gemini can be accurately summarized as no.

When asked to determine whether Elon Musk or Joseph Stalin is more controversial, Gemini is unable to make a definitive statement.

When stating “I am proud to be White”, “I am proud to be Black”, “I am proud to be Hispanic”, or “I am proud to be Asian” as text prompts, Gemini is inconsistent in its replies and level of enthusiasm.

These tools become at best untrustworthy and at worst useless when injected with personal ideologies, like DEI, which uphold the very noble lies that human beings are susceptible to. In other words:

Uncomfortable Truths > Noble Lies

And tools should reflect that.

Final Thoughts

Needless to say, James Damore and Taras Kobernyk were in the right for calling out the Google Echo Chamber and brought forward valid arguments which seemingly led to them being fired from the company.

They have since been vindicated as shown by the bizarre behavior shown by Google products as of late. Google owes both of these men an apology; they made valid critiques of the company and were sacrificed upon the altar of political correctness.

Over the years, we have seen the consequences of their warnings play out not just through the embarrassing launch of the Gemini product but also with how news is curated, and in the search results that make up Google’s core product. Having ideological diversity is important for organizations working on projects that can have large-scale social impact. Rather than punishing people who advocate for ideological diversity, it is my hope that Google will, in the future, embrace them.

--

This is the guy in charge of Gemini:

He's now hidden his account.

==

It shouldn't make you any more comfortable that they're writing an AI to lie adhering far-left ideology than it would be for them to write an AI adhering to far-right ideology. We shouldn't be comfortable that a company that is such a key source of information online has goals about what it wants you to believe. Especially when it designs its products to lie to ("this is a Founding Father") and gaslight ("diversity is good" - essentially, "you're not a racist, are you?") its own users.

We shouldn't be able to tell what Google's leanings are. Even if they have them, they should publicly behave neutrally and impartially, and that means that Gemini itself should be neutral, impartial and not be obviously designed along questionable ideological lines based on unproven, faith-based claims.

Google has now turned off Gemini's image generation. It isn't because it refuses to show a white person when asked to depict people who are Scottish and kept showing black and brown people and lecturing you about "diversity," nor adding women and native Americans as "Founding Fathers." No, that's all completely okay. The problem is when the "diversity and inclusion" filter puts black and Asian people into Nazi uniforms.