#and it was only because i felt unsafe at home and i almost didnt know where else to go until i found somewhere and it wasnt here

[mbat]

nothing makes you hate a mid restaurant like going there several hundred times and not ONCE was going there your choice. there has to be thousands of restaurants in this city and i would never choose to go here out of all of them

[yukennico]

about other characters from the white day au (mostly saki, toya, kanade and rui) its very long btw

ok so, toya and saki escaped when tsukasa killed his parents, running to the nearest kingdom looking for refuge, theyd be the first one to tell about the dangers of the cursed kingdom

toya was actually the second to become kings cursed knight, but since he escaped the king had to look for another person to become his left hand, that being mafuyu afterwards. at first, toyas dad didnt believe him, because he didnt attend to tsukasas "ascension", since it was a private event between the king and the knights family (toya realized the truth via saki), but then toyas dad saw the kingdoms fall and massacre, he just stayed in denial because he doesnt like being in the wrong and betraying the king

mafuyu in this case, when she became a cursed knight, she also targeted her mom, but she was saved by tsukasa stabbing mafuyu. mafuyu was left horrified after that, unable to keep caring for her daughter and being scared of her, hence why mafuyu was left with a bad mental health, since her mother was the last person that holded her sanity (at that time she and her dads event wasnt released so hes dead here i think)

about saki, at first she was angry and sad at her brother, because she didnt comprehend what happened with the shock and grief, it took her a long time for her to stop being angry at him and understood that he wasnt in control at that moment. before they escaped, tsukasa and saki had a fight, which its what led saki and toya fled from there. tsukasa then wasnt completely apathetic so he was left hurt and with the idea that his siblings hated him

kanade was a girl mafuyu met when she used to escape from her kingdom being a child, a literal toddler running out to a field unsafely, unknowingly going to the white lily kingdom, thats where she met kanade and promised to be best friends forever (they were like 8). after mafuyu was found out doing these and was scolded by it, she never left again, but kanade will still wait her everyday, until when they saw each other again and it was when mafuyu wanted to escaped for real, being told that she was in a great danger (kanade realized what she was talking about thanks to saki and toya) so she tried to help her, but mafuyu didnt achieve it and now kanade has another one new purpose

also she felt like she failed because she already was guilty for not being able to protect her parents, so she tried harder to improve her battle skills to save people, specially mafuyu

i feel like ive talked rui enough from the last posts, but hes a prodigy sorcerer that is in his nature to be good at magic. he wanted to become the kingdoms sorcerer/mage to help tsukasa after this one becomes a royal knight, but before that the faithful day happened where tsukasa wanted to stab his eye out. now he works with kanade and ena to get a cure or something to break that curse

ena is a powerful mage/sorcerer that left the kingdom to further her studies and understanding on magic, in frustration of her father not comprehending her hard work, so she set for a long travel until she came back after reading the news about her kingdom, worried about her family and most importantly her little brother (who also escaped from home to wander around but she didnt know), thats when she finds rui and escapes to the lily kingdom. she found akito there and beat him up by worrying her so much. her parents are fine because akito got them out when he met toya

enas role is to help rui to find a way to break the curse, but she knows that the only way is to enchanting something and killing them in order to free them, but she doesnt like the idea so it was left unsaid for a period of time

she knew mafuyu before, by being in the same kingdom and such, but didnt interact too much. also knew tsukasa because he was loud and studied the same high school with him (ena and tsukasa are almost the same age here, she being 28 and tsukasa being 27)

i really wanted to give akito and mizuki a huge role in this, since they were the og of the white day set (and shiho as well) but i really couldnt work with so many characters and thinking how what to do with them. the least i could do with akito was like a side quest for toya, to find a half dragon hybrid and becoming friend with him 👍 thats all

other than that, all the other casts live safely and eager to help in the white lily kingdom (kanades kingdom). initially i also wanted to add ichika in this, as a spy to get through tsukasa since childhood friends and such, but it wouldnt make sense as i kept polishing this lore so it was left out

akito and mizuki were supposedly on tsukasas sides, but it also didnt make sense as for why they kept being there and helping the king to destroy and murder people, and so the idea was also left out

for now i still dont know what roles to give to the other characters, but im satisfied with how things are for now

[kael-writ]

I also think we need to get away from the idea that all panhandlers are and have to be homeless or they don't actually need to panhandle. In my building are several people on disability who panhandle because disability payments are too low for them to have much quality of life. Some are addicts, some arent.

(As an addict who is clean and sober now I can tell you that addicts do in fact have to use their money for other things because we do actually eat food.)

Frankly, I dont often choose to give to panhandlers right now, because Im very poor and a part of my income always comes from begging and borrowing myself. I HATE begging and borrowing. I despise myself for it. I shouldn't, no one lending or giving wants me to, but I do. But if I didnt, I couldnt get by.

In homeless outreach when we go to camps or whatever we often do drives for commonly sought items like socks and hand those out. I used to try to give some money but being swarmed by a bunch of strangers wanting cash when Im poor was overwhelming and felt unsafe. So there are times when it does make sense to offer items.

Same as when I was still online- panhandling because I was homeless and I was openly relapsing. Someone was only comfortable buying me something off my amazon wishlist. And that's fine.

BUT - I am diabetic. My ex when he used to panhandle (and wasn't homeless) came home with junk food every day. Pizza a lot. Ive gone through lots of phases, before diabetes and now, when junk or just cheap carbs was almost all I got. And man, you start to LONG for some fuckin fresh veggies.

A LOT of homeless people are diabetic. A LOT. It's very, very common in homeless people and that doubtless applies to panhandlers who aren't homeless. Because it's the poverty (and being disabled by diabetes makes working long shifts harder). The year I became homeless was also the year after my diagnosis drove me into a tailspin.

So getting a bunch of random free food is necessary to not starve to death immediately but at the same time, MONEY FOR FOOD is a lot better for people to actually CONTROL THEIR HEALTH and not go through the horrors of diabetes long term like going blind or losing a fuckin leg.

Also, one person gave me a gift card to Chik Fil A and I never used it bc Im too queer to be that desperate. So gift cards can be great but likewise not always usable.

You know what got me outta homelessness? MONEY. I worked hard at a job, I got donations, but ultimately I broke down and let a abusive relative basically give me most of first months rent plus security deposit. VERY few people are that fuckin privileged.

When I was homeless and working a job and begging online, I spent money on booze, I spent money on tips, I spent money on socks and laundry and coffeeshops to get outta the cold. I spent money the way I do now, the way any human being does.

So yeah, it's ok to want to offer items, but just throwing random food at people who need money isnt solving shit. Unhoused people need housing, panhandlers need money, what they use it for isnt really your concern, that's really all there is to it. If you have extra and that's a way you want to help someone, just do it and feel good about it, if not that's ok but dont be a prick about it.

like can you imagine if you, as a housed person, said "oh man im really struggling financially right now I can't pay my bills- my electric is going to be cut off, my car might get repossessed, and I definitely can't afford to get a new laptop after mine broke"

and someone who had a lot more money than you said "I can help you!" and you were like"oh my god great thank you so much-" and then they just offered to take you to olive garden. and you say "hey man that's really nice but I'm actually okay on food right now, I really just need to pay some of these bills. I already got food somewhere else (foodstamps, friends, food pantries) and I really just need money. if you can't do it that's fine but I don't need food"

and the rich person said "you must not really need money or be poor then or else you'd take me up on my offer. I bet you were going to use that money on drugs anyway"

that's what yall sound like when you refuse to give homeless people money & just offer to buy them food

food is great! if you need it and that's what you're asking for. unfortunately food doesn't buy clothes, hygiene products, shelter, pay a phone bill, or yes even buy drugs or alcohol if you're going into detox and can't do so safely without literally dying

[soloteam-saber]

Forsaken Myth - Prequel

(this scene starts from The Narrators eyes , all creators mentioned have humanoid shapes with question marks on their faces and have purple outlines) Narrator (looking at the view of the doodlesphere): Everyone used to try to change the future of this place and there are still some that are trying right now , but they all have selfish reasons to do so , or at the very least have some dubious justifications for their actions.

Narrator (closes his eyes , the screen goes dark): But what if I were to tell you that , at some point , there were some people that actually cared for this place a bit , like I did. Im not saying their reasons arent selfish , but they werent destructive at the very least.

Narrator (opens his eyes , the doodlesphere comes back into view , creators in sight) : These people used to work here , making this place more colourful and lively each day. In the early days , mass destruction events were not even taken into consideration , because everyone had the same goal: to make this place enjoyable , happy , like home...of course , this happiness is subjective from creator to creator.

Narrator (looks at the creator): However , this creator specifically was not satisfied with only creating something just for the fun of it, SHE felt the need to connect with other creators , to get to know them in a way or another. And what was the best way to get others to share things with her? Well , they were all good at one thing , creating.

Narrator (the creator is approaching other creators): So she invited every inventor out there to join her in the making of an universe , but what made this one different than any other ? SHE told them that they would all be able to assign themselves a being , a monster of their choice , and teach them the skill or ability that they were the best at. That way , once they were done with developing everything , they would all be able to learn different things from the monsters other creators made . All these valuable skills would be accessible to everyone that started their route in the universe ... a dangerous game to play...

Narrator (looks at the universe) : But most of the creators were against this idea . They called it foolish and unsafe. Despite their objections , there were still enough creators that joined and helped make this universe , but barely enough to cover all the monster races. Can you really imagine what this universe would have looked like if nobody worked on it?...It wouldnt have looked like anything , it wouldnt exist if there werent enough creators to help make this , which means that all the makers of this universe are to blame for what happened next.

Narrator (the view switches to inside the universe) : So then they all started ”coding” away , making their own little twists and teaching skills to the monsters they picked. At that point , SHE realised that the universe they were making was destined to be a safe haven , a place where everyone can get to know eachother by simply going around and chatting with a monster. This was also her way of getting to talk with other creators during the development of the universe.

Narrator (view switches to the creator within the universe): But SHE still needed to pick a monster of her choice to develop. She looked around and realised that all of her choices were exhausted. Everyone had already picked their own being , but she was left in the dust , the one that came with the idea in the first place. As SHE looked at the list of characters that partake in the action of a normal timeline , there was something that caught her eye. A character that had almost no role in the story , and would only appear in THAT route. SHE had to develop something , otherwise SHE would get left out , so the decision was made. Chara would be her development project and there were no objections made , as this whole project was her objective to learn about other creators , so there was no problem if her creation didnt take any role in this. ”Its not like there would be any instances of Chara appearing anyways” SHE said , ”This was made only for creators use only and there shouldnt be any routes starting as long as they are here ”.

Narrator (view switches to the creator editing Chara's code): And here is how everything started. Her view of Chara was one of a mindless murderer ,but SHE had to put in her own personal skill or trait , putting anything else in would defeat the purpose of this project. ”You want to learn everything there is to learn in this place and...” her voice pauses. Her mind wanders around for a bit , but then her voice starts again more confident than ever ”...you yearn for power ,but only to use it to defend whats precious to you”. This was probably her way of trying to tame a REAL monster from doing anything bad in case something went wrong , but SHE knew this wouldnt be the case since Chara was never meant to be free from her spiritual form in a ”normal” universe. The mistake on her behalf was thinking that this was a ”normal” universe , however this universe was never meant for routes and for normal interactions between a player and monsters. A powerful trait nonetheless, but id say that ... you have picked the wrong MONSTER to apply it to...

Narrator (looks at the creators chat and play with their finished creations): When they finished , they started playing and chatting with their creations and with eachother. Oh , to be proud of something you worked hard on. But not all good things last forever... they eventually finished talking and exploring the skills of their creations , a fun way to see what others are interested in , sure, but they didnt have the will to actually learn anything from them. Their main job was creating their own personal universes , so when they were finally finished exploring everything , they started leaving one by one... every creator must finish their own work , even if this was a fun side project. SHE looked at each and every one of them leaving slowly , as they were done messing around with the one thing that brought them together , and to be honest , SHE had grown a bit bored of it as well. Her goal was fulfilled: getting to know other people just like her , and she was proud of the result. But what should one do with something they dont use? So much was put in this project and getting rid of it was off the table for her , so she decided to simply leave it be. That universe became the only thing that would remind her of the connections SHE made with others , something that was near and dear to her.

Narrator (looks at the Snowdin from within the universe): But as everyone else left and the original creator that started this whole thing left , this universe had no purpose anymore. The only thing that made this place peaceful was the creators presence , but as they all took their leave , the game simply begun working as usual. And so , the first route started and , as we all know, it started with. . . (To be continued in part 1 of timeline Nr.1)

[soft-boi-eli]

Ok ok! Good uhm.

Ok since body dysmorphia has been kicking my butt lately i wanted to request something with Schlatt where basically the reader Starts getting really insecure because of their body. Pushing and pulling on their stomach etc. They also start binding unsafely with like really tight bras because they can't afford a binder and they end up fucking up their ribs really bad. They end up in the hospital and a very worried Schlatt visit's them and lectures them about how they shouldn't have done that and about how worried he was. So when they get back home there is a gift on the bed, turns out Schlatt bought them a binder.

The reader would be Non-binary and afab.

Also a little message for pretty much anyone who is insecure about their body/has body dysmorphia because of their chest, don't bind unsafely. That can really fuck up your chest and make you actually being happy with your body even harder.

Hell yes. I love this idea thank you icarus! Writing has been rude to me lately and I needed inspiration. This has hit it exactly.

Pronouns:nonbinary (dont think any were actually used in this so yeah.)

Tw: AFAB reader, swearing, insecurity, mention of surgry, mention of blood, mention of hating self, pain. Again angst to fluff. It is reflecting on how I have felt about my body before because I needed to make it seem kinda real.

PSA: please dont bind safely. It's dangerous and can lead to serious health consequences. I know hating your body sucks but I dont want anyone to get hurt because they dont listen to their lungs, they dont take off their binder, or if their bras are way too fucking tight. It can and will hurt you. So please bind safely!!

Happy birth-what the fuck?!

Lately your brain was giving you more dysphoria then ever. Telling you your body was too big, your boobs were too noticable, and you hips are too feminine.

What brought this on? Someone simply said your dead name. It made your dysphoria hit you like a truck.

After that day everything went down hill. Your stopped streaming, telling your followers that you were going on a mental break, you didn't really talk to friends, your brain could put words together. And you most importantly barely texted your loving supporting boyfriend schaltt, not wanting to break down in front of him.

You never had the time or thoughts of getting a chest binder. It was your biggest mistake honestly.

Deciding against chest binders and wearing alot of tight bras to flatten you. But it didnt work. So you got tighter bras. And they did work. But you didnt read up on how to bind safely.

This lead to the predicament now. In front of your mirror you were pinching and pulling at your skin. There was too much. All you wanted to do was cut it off with scissors. But decided against it due to the fact of all the blood that you would loose.

Your chest, smaller then it was yas, was still visible after your 3rd bra. You decided to add a 4th and tighter one hoping it would completely hide your boobs.

Your body made you want to puke. It made you feel disgusting. But you never told schaltt that. Afraid that he would say that you looked as gross as you thought you did.

Only 5 minutes after the 4th bra you felt excoriating pain in your ribs. And worse of all a harsh pop. That immediately brought red flags. It hurt to breath. Your head fuzzy and light headed.

Your only reaction, to call for an ambulance. Dialing the three numbers as you whimpered in pain you held onto your lungs. "911 what's your emergency?" "I cant breathe. It hurts so bad. Please help." "Are you by yourself?" "Yes. I need help please." "Ambulance, firemen, and police are on their way. Ambulance is 2 minutes out."

You didnt know if you had 2 minutes. "They can break the door down if I dont answer." That's all you said after collapsing.

Next thing you knew your door was busted off its hinges and you saw two paramedics. They were quick to transfer you to the ambulance, cutting through the four bras that held your chest.

It help get air to your lungs but it barely helped.

"We have a collapsed lung. ETA 2 minutes." The paramedic back there with you spoke to the walkie talkie.

Collapsed lung? Was that the harsh pop? God, was the bras that bad of an idea? All that was going through your mind was how you possibly could get worse. The instant you got into the trauma bay was way worse. With no time to numb you and your O2 stats dropping they had to cut between your ribs and shove a tube right next to your left lung. Draining air and excess blood blocking your lung from inflating. And before you knew it you were off to emergency surgery for getting a shard of bone out of your chest cavity.

The last thing you remember was counting down and falling asleep.

When you woke up your boyfriend was next to your bed, hands engulfing one of yours.

It looked like he had been crying before falling asleep on one of your legs. Taking your free hand through his hair you smiled lightly. "I'm sorry for all of this ram boy." He grunted lightly and moved his head back into your hand. His messy hair was thick and nearly matted. It made you wonder how long he's been sitting there. You loved him and felt so selfish for doing this to him.

"I cant believe I did all this and for what? To cause you and everyone pain? All because i couldnt afford a chest binder and deciding that I might as well try another way. I should have been safer huh?" You didnt expect an answer back. Just his quite snores.

"Yeah. Not really fuckin selfish more like kinda dumb. Your body doesnt show who the fuck you are (y/n). Your heart does. And your heart isnt say boy or girl. Its saying you are you. A person who uses pronouns they them. A person that love everyone and cares for their friends. A person who love me and jambo so deeply."

He took a breath.

"You normally are quite smart. Saving up for one would of been a better idea instead of doing such a stupid thing. Asking for my help. Because if I knew I would of helped. I would of found one just right for you. I would help you remember to take it off after 8 hours. Even would of found a way to make you feel more like you."

You could hear his heart break.

"But now you're here, four broken ribs, a healing lung, and stuck in the hospital for another week at least."

You felt so guilty. He was right. You should of told him. He would never have seen you like you saw yourself. He never cared about how you looked. He only cared for your heart.

Tears falling down your face you continued to massage his scalp. "I could of lost you. You are my rock. When I cant keep up my normal antics and feel like I'm at an all time low. You are there to pick me up." You had to stop the sob from coming up. "I'm just so happy youre alive." He looked up.

His red eyes were making your heart ache. "I wont do it again I promise. But I cant just ignore the feeling of dread whe. I look down and realize I present so much like a girl. I dont wa t to be one." Schaltt nodded and kissed the hand he was holding. "Then let me help you. I wont let this happen again. Just please. Come to me. Talk to me. I'm here like you are for me."

You gave a small nod.

This man knew his way to your heart. He was so sincere about this. "I will. But promise me you wont look down on me if I end up feeling like that." You just needed to make sure you knew he would never but you needed his words. "Mever sugarbabe. Never in my life have I looked down on you and never will."

God the week was long, him and the doctor explaining safe binding that you cant fully bind for at least 6-8 weeks. Schlatt telling you his reaction to finding your apartment swarmed with police and firemen and you no where to be seen.

He was practicing on saying happy birthday to you. But was cut off. "Happy birth-what the fuck?!" He was so concerned and even more so when you were in hospital.

When you did go home he helped you through the door, and watched you as you saw the small package on your couch.

Opening it you saw a chest binder. Specifically the one you were looking at. Looking over to schaltt with tears in your eyes you walked up and hugged him lightly minding the pain in your left side. This was the best gift.

The only gift you had been wanting for the past week or two. "Now you can be safe. But no binding till your doctor says so or I swear to god I will personally smite you down." You had to try so hard no to laugh or the pain would of been hell. Kissing his cheek you smiled.

"Of course schaltt. I will make sure to not wear it till I'm healed dont want to get blood on it ya know. Also it would hurt like a fucking bitch."

He chuckled and ruffled your hair. "Alright now go sit down. I'll get you some soup ya dork."

This was going to be a great time. That was until the pain fully came back. And then this is going to be a mediocre time.

Please pardon spelling errors. I havent proof read. And I am on mobile for almost all stories. But thank you so much for requesting this became something that I could write and it helped me alot. Now I might take a while for other things too and i apologize that's cause i am starting school soon. Also family issues. So yeah might take a bit. Dont know how long though. I'll try to keep them coming but if not you know I'm studying or helping my mom and grandma.

Eli out.

[markitchii]

another headcanon

this feels like a fanfiction but anyway,

leon and raihan is a pretty healthy couple.when theyre in the middle of an argument,if one raise their voice just a bit,the other backs off and suggest to take a few hours,even days to cool down, and then talk about it when theyre calm and is able to think straight to avoid unwanted events.

and currently theyre in the middle of an argument,theres a rising problem in the league,and them being the top trainers with equally great intelligence,  theyre expected to solve it

theyve been arguing because when theyre discussing about how to solve it,theres a ...quite serious disagreement , which led into a debating session,so they decide to have time to think about it by themselves instead of discussing about it,just for a day or two.

but theres another problem rising,which came from a different source, a pokemon breeding centre,theres some issue with dragon type pokemon,leon expect raihan to be the only person whos expected to help,but because leon has 2 on his team,he was asked to help raihan. sadly he cant decline the request. 

theyre in the middle of their “argument” but that doesnt matter of course,since both got an email to help the breeder to solve the pokemon breeding issue,they push their personal problems aside and try to discuss about it,which sadly led into another debating session. both decide to stop and sit down

raihan lets out a sigh “3 days?”

“..sure i guess” leon answer hesitantly,both actually cool off easily and they certainly dont need 3 days to just cool down and think. 3 days without raihan is too long afterall,but leon assume that maybe,he had pushed the wrong buttons and just agree to avoid another conflict,which wont happen.he knows raihan, but he rather not

raihan tilts his head “you look hesitant, 2 days maybe? ive already set up papers to solve the other problem we had,so i guess 2 days is enough,how about you?”

leon looks up to raihan, “i already figure out yesterdays solution too, so... 2 days? then we discuss about the league issue,then suggesting it to the staff?”

raihan nodded “yes,then we discuss about this and gave the result to the pokemon breeding centre”

leon agrees, finally,an agreement.

the next day comes, leon suddenly has an appointment out of nowhere,oleana certainly didnt tell him about this,and now,leon is sorrounded by hellspawns.

hes in the local kindergarten,which is not bad, but this kindergarten hits different,leon has lost count of kids whos trying to stole his cap and pull his cape off. heck,even one kid almost peed on him. 

once hes free from hell,he really wants to reunite with raihan,but theyre on their...relationship break? he doesnt even know what its called because its really rare for them to argue.

but because leon is on the edge of bursting out,he decide to just,take a quick shower to make himself look presentable,and flew to hammerlocke

he arrives at the gym, walking through the hall,being guided by one of the gym trainer,to raihans office. his eyes is already glassy with tears.

he entered raihans office, raihan is there, sitting on the couch with paperworks,he move his head to meet leon,eyes wide when he see a familiar purple hair

���leon? do you want to discuss it now? ive cooled down and i al-”

leon lets out a mewl,a sad one. which surprises raihan. raihan stared at him,brows furrowing,he noticed leons golden eyes were glistening “wait-” he got up,walks his way to leon “dandelion,darling” oh how leon has been craving to be called that, “whats wrong? did i do something-”

“i had a surprise appointment today” leon croak out “i- oleana didnt told me about it-” did he just sob? “i wasnt prepared and we went to a fucking place filled with tiny demonic creatures” he leans in to raihans comforting touch “worst than giratina and darkrai, id prefer to hang out with them rather than those- those kids” leons sobs got more violent “they- they were trying to stole my champion hat and tried to pull of my cape,which almost choked me,dragon” 

raihan concerns starts to grow faster when leon called him dragon,since leon only use that particular nickname when he feels unsafe or when hes super stressed out. 

“i- i almost cried in place, i was tired for- figuring out the solutions and we had 2 debate in a span of one week, we, we rarely argue dragon,” leons grip on raihans arm got tighter,”those kids” raihan can see pure fear in leons eyes “hit the spot,one- one of them almost peed on me raihan,im glad one of the teacher grab them fast enough,i wouldnt know what id do if that actually happened”

raihan hold leon tight,then make him to sit down on the couch, leon didnt let go of raihan when raihan wanted to take a cup of water, he asked raihan to stay and hold him more, raihan cant blame him,that kindergarten IS basically hell and he doesnt understand how the teacher can withstand those tiny demons, this week has been hectic too,he cant blame leon really,he felt bad about initiating one of the debates but,i guess that doesnt matter anymore when theyve found the solutions.

leon is now on his lap,hugging raihan by the shoulder sobbing quietly. all raihan can do is hugging leon back,making sure he feels safe. 

after the sobbing had died down,raihan asks leon

“lee?baby?” raihan calls out, leon lets out a mumble, “let me handle the pokemon breeding issue yeah? its about dragon type afterall,i can do it myself,im just gonna take your typed out suggestions and take care of it by my own,about the league issue,lets just combine our solution and come with a neutral conclusion, is that okay darling? or do you want to discuss about it tomorrow? we can stay in my place if you want”

leon slowly repositioned his body to face raihan,he nodded “yeah, okay,ill let you take care of the breeding centre,but dont overwork yourself raihan, about the league,lets just combine our solutions,it does feels irresponsible though,they expect us-”

“leon,my dearest,lets think about YOU for awhile,the league aint shit,my love,how do you feel about it?” raihan cuts off

“...i..personally,i dont want too..” leon looks down, he wants to give the best for the league,but raihan is right,he needs to prioritize himself just for tonight,so he can give the best to the region tomorrow morning

“there you go,now- let me just-” raihan proceed to carry leon, as if hes a baby,leon just dont give a single fuck at this point,he just want to sleep like a rock for 8 hours,he leaned and put his head near raihans neck,looping his arm around raihans shoulder tighter,hes grateful raihan is big and strong enough to carry a 80kg bulky man like he is

“dragon,love” leon mumbled right next to raihans ear, “im..sorry i initiated the breeding center debate,i .. i shouldnt even argue with you,you knew so much more”, raihan kissed leons head, “no worries baby,i dont mind,you are a bit...selfish sometimes,but its okay,its not like im far from that either,since im the one who started to argue about the league issue,despite me not knowing much about it,im sorry about that too”

leon answered “so we good?”

raihan smiled, “always been”

leon hugged raihan tighter and closed his eyes,trusting his dragon that he will take care of him,when leon opened his eyes,hes already in a familiar place,raihans apartment,to be more specific,hes on the bed,wearing one of raihans t-shirt and...his own pajama pants? raihan is currently putting socks on his left feet,raihan noticed that his prince has woke up, “go back to sleep,ill keep you safe,i wont let rose or oleana to put their hands on you” leon looked at him “but how about you?im not gonna have a day off tomorrow if youre not sitting next to me,whats the point of a single day off if 1 of my favorite person isnt there next to me?”

raihans got surprised “wait how did you know i told them to give you a day off?” leon smiled “instinct”

raihan chuckled while crawling to the bed,setting himself next to leon, “i didnt enter hell today so i dont need one” he teased, leon hugs raihan by the waist,giving it a firm grip “raihan my precious dragon, love,sweetheart,im begging you to stay, please,im not fully sane yet,i need you to keep me on the ground,and dont commit a genocide,raihan pleaaase,do your work at home-” raihan cuts him off “no! you’d help me with it! you need to rest,prince!” raihan answered with a laugh, leon tighten his grip “but i need you! how can you leave me alone and insane like this! how dare you!” leon said,mimicking his voice to sound like a dramatic damsel in distrest

raihan obeys,of course he will,hes actually on the edge too,the breeders are plain out stupid and its no wonder that the dragon type mons had an issue,they shouldve put the baby on HIS breeding center instead,he knows well about it anyway,who the heck brought the baby dragons there?! not to mention how they act like they know more than raihan,the dragon tamer,the only certified dragon type specialist in the whole region. raihan was so fed up,the paperwork from the gym arent helping either,he got 3 helping hands and it overwhelms them all,he guess he should give the whole gym trainer just a single day break to sleep the whole day and get themselves charge. and so he did,he typed out a short email to all the gym trainers,that they will have a day off tomorrow,

leon smiled in satisfaction as raihan typed out the email on his phone,he knew raihan was close to murder someone too,,but knowing raihan,he wont take a day off if leon told him too. but raihan WILL do it,if leon beg raihan to stay with him,hes concerned about it and might talk about it, that he should prioritize himself and not his lover,but not definitely not now,nor later.someday probably.

after raihan sent the emails,he turned off the bedside lamp, and proceed he put his head on leons plump chest, “alright,nighty night prince,i love you”

leon put his hand on top of raihans head,petting it gently“night dragon,i love you too”

then they sleep. 

[pixieswashere]

First off, I agree with everything with what OP said here. I want to also add onto this that it makes no sense for AU!Jinx/Powder not to have her mental illness/psychosis, not only bc of the fact she had it since she was a child....but also bc in that universe.....Vi is dead...like SHE IS GONE. If anything the trauma and psychosis would still be there, if not worsen overtime.

Like at first when I started it, I didn't think much thinking that in this universe she had professionall help in coping with it healthily.....but then the Vi reveal and the fact we didnt see her having some hallucinations or voices is what ruined this......her ONLY last remaining family to her parents and who was very close to her clearly...is DEAD. Jinx loved her sister so much and had a mental breakdown as a kid when she LEFT her to go and find Vander. The only person who was there that BELIEVED in her, STUCK up for her, and practically raised her along Vander. You're telling me, Jinx wouldn't have any slightest of a breakdown or crisis over that??? At all??? Even when considering her mental state???

Adding to this for Viktor (bc I love him and I 100% agree that his character was fumbled)

Viktor NEVER hated himself in s1 let's get that straight. In S1, he makes a very big POINT to show that he has always carried himself and that in whatever he does, he is proud of it because he believed in himself enough to accept who he is and DOESN'T care about what others think of him

"When you're going to change the world don't ask for permission."

"I didn't have the benefits of a patron or a name, I simply....BELIEVED in MYSELF."

You could argue that while yes he is self-assured and confident, he still has some insecurities of how people close to him perceive him....and that could be true, but it's not really ever alluded. He DOES care about making connections but hes isolated himself bc of these judgements that its almost second nature if not a rarity. But he does value companionship, its just not something he is accustomed to a degree, and he sometimes without consideration distances himself from it if it gets in the way of his aspirations (Ex: Sky/Jayce, Heimerdinger/Singed.) In the latter acts of S1 he was DYING he wasn't hating himself because of his "terminal illness" that was killing him or his disability....He was in a vulnerable and solemn state because he felt like his accomplishments meant or achieved NOTHING. This is a character that is selfless, altruistic and a workaholic who worked his way up with dreams of something better and now after so many years in developing Hextech he's seeing that what he strived to achieve for the improvement of his home that's also DYING because of Piltover's ignorance and oppression, is unable to do NOTHING about it now.

He is angry that he has no CONTROL over his fate and the assuredness of his Legacy = helping those in need for the Undercity because of Jayce and Piltover's lack of understanding, especially after they had complied building the Hexgates for their trade disputes first.....over the disputes of lives. Viktor has contemplated death because he knows time is fleeting and he wants to make it count for something good, he doesnt want to be remembered as PERFECT, he wants to be remembered in the contributions that the people of Zaun will FINALLY heal/be helped after so long and not have to live short lives bc of unsafe work environments, manual labour, illnesses cause by toxic chemicals and etc.

He even brushes the idea of when he'll die off, and you could even add that he is ticked off by the fact that hes now being perceived as a "dead man" before he even died (Ex. Heimerdinger convo and Jayce in the hospital, etc). He doesn't like being seen as powerless or as his terminal illness now because he ISN'T and never was. Furthermore, he doesnt use the Hexcore to "PERFECT" himself, he's using it to heal himself of his terminal illness/expand his lifespan so that he can continue his research in helping Zaun.

If he is going to use Hexcore, he needs to make sure that it will work. So, to tests its capabilities, he tests it on HIMSELF. Only to find out that the same thing he created to HEAL ended up killing someone that meant a lot to him. He wasted NO TIME telling Jayce to destroy it bc it harmed someone and he finally realizes that ensuring a legacy = saving people....ended up at the cost of harming people in return.

P.s. sorry this was long. Hope you enjoyed reading it if u did !

I don't have perfect thoughts on it, but I do want to note that I'm not loving how Arcane handles disability.

Viktor hating his disability so deeply, feeling that it needs to be "fixed" so thoroughly, that he succumbs to ~ultimate eugenics for everyone ~ ?????? fucked up

Jinx's psychosis being a manifestation of her being "unhinged" and encouraging her to act out either to challenge or appease them, and then her psychosis magically disappearing in the "perfect" universe????? also fucked up

Vi's alcoholism and (albeit mild) psychotic symptoms never being brought up....ever???? just created as fodder to make her a more angsty and submissive lapdog to facism????? also also fucked up

Let me have my mad/cripple characters who have their shit recognized as parts of their humanity rather than trauma porn plot or things that need to be corrected or traits indicative of rash violence please

[pbandjesse]

Today was a better day. My back hurts from leaning over and working. But I will take a shower and an aspirin soon and things will be okay. Emotionally I am feeling okay. But I might just be in denial about the state of the world. You know. The pandemic and all. 

I slept okay last night. I woke up and James came and laid with me for a few minutes. He made the bed so I didnt have to rush. I got washed up and dressed and felt pretty good. I am glad I wore an extra shirt because man. It got really cold all of a sudden. I didnt grab a jacket and that was a mistake. 

I headed to work and got there on time. We had some new kids today. A younger, sibling pair. Very sweet. But they were the only ones there until almost noon! Wild. I dont know why the twins didnt come in. But The sisters did. And it was a nice day. 

I mostly read. I did a little sewing but my heart wasnt in it. And while the one girl asked to bead she was supposed to be working so I couldnt say yes. Honestly everyone was a little distracted by art today. But as long as they get the work done I am only mildly concerned. I cant focus on someone just talking at me either so I just gotta make sure thats their learning style. 

We did go outside. It was just really windy. But we played with the long board I brought. Rode it down the grassy hill. We tried it on the sidewalk but you got to fast and then we had to go inside when one of them rode over their own finger.  My only rule was dont get hurt and they didnt follow it! So we went inside and I cleaned her up and got her bandaided. 

We stayed inside for a little while. I was just cold. But the kids wanted to go out. I ended up suggesting building a stick fort and they were super into that. And that was a lot of fun. I didnt get a better picture of it after the half hour of building. I hope it is still there tomorrow. It was a lot of fun. 

I also built with legos with the youngest boy. I made a cat and told him to make a friend for it while I ran to the hallway to listen to the government announcement in the hallway. They have moved us back to a red zone. Its getting worse. I texted Jess and she told me they are locking philly back down. All restaurants and gyms and museums and libraries are closed as of friday. Were not there yet but I honestly think by next week we will be. Right now they are just putting capacity restrictions in place again, and giving curfews for resturants and bars, so they have to close at 10pm. I dont think it goes far enough honestly. But well see what happens I guess. I just keep hand sanitizing the kids and making sure we have masks on. But its hard. Like emotionally this is taking a toll. I miss my parents. 

I was sort of chomping at the bit to leave. So off I went. And after a pit stop at tacobell I went right home. 

When I got back here I found our front door open? I know the upstairs people are moving or something but it made me feel a little unsafe. I dont know. I just closed it and hoped for the best. 

I had my late lunch and played some games. Got to work on some studio stuff. Not a lot. I did get to play around with the free motion foot and I am super excited with the progress. The front looks good but honestly the back is my favorite part. I am pretty excited to try more thread drawing. 

The sun went down and I was thinking about walking to the store. Eventually I decided to go over to the walgreens even though it felt like it was so late at night. At 615pm. 

It was a nice walk. I got a few things. Mostly just walked around. Looking at stuff. And then I went home. 

I worked on the commission frogs I have. Talked with the person who commissioned me and realized I had messed up the colors. Oops. So I fixed them and recut the fabrics. They kept apologizing and I was ike. No it was my fault!! And not a big deal at all. But my back hurt so I took a break. Made ramen. Forgot about the ramen. Ate it an hour later. 

I went through my camping bag again. Made sure I had enough layers and socks and tights. I am pretty pleased and looking at the weather forecast I think its going to be really good. 

Now I am just sitting the the kitchen texting with Jess. I am ready to go take a shower, take my nail polish off, and lay down. Wait for my boyfriend to get home. And I hope its just a nice night. 

Take care of yourselves everyone. Sleep good. Wash your hands. 

[starlinfae]

Update of sorts. I just found out recently that I've been diagnosed without my knowledge with psychotic personality and mixed personality since at least 2004 (I was diagnosed transgender 2008 though my first visits over that were in 2003 and it was overturned in 2017). Whether I've been knowledgeable in 2004 or 2003 about the first two diagnoses, I do not know but with my current state of being, I do not recall ever being told about those diagnoses or having been treated for either of them at said era or after until 2012 when I had an episode that gave me psychotic personality diagnosis and medication (which nulled my entire sense of self and identity and I lost all talents such as singing and arts and any and all personality traits I identified/identify myself by). And didnt affect however any of the symptoms it was prescribed for.

I had the trauma and dissociation test finished, with the parting words of the nurse admitting based on her idea of the extent of my research into did/osdd (truthfully a few pages on did-research website) that she had a difficult time administering the test and claimed that since childhood I've been without control creating characters (she did not explain where she got this belief) to appeal and try to gain affection from my parents (sounded like kitchen psychology to me and left me entirely confused),while the truth is because of my cult upbringing and unstable mother and the whole religious dynamic pervasive through every single day of my childhood, I would've been making everything worse by play pretending to be a boy toward my parents. (This was the nurses point, that I wanted to be a boy to gain affection as if that would have worked and become a valid method of gaining affection. I have no memories of such nature toward my parents. What I do remember however is macro managing my behaviour by watching my mothers reactions, where she didn't even have to say a word for me to begin changing my behaviour to avoid her flipping on me or punish me for being wrong).

So in short, the nurse said the test indicated zero dissociative symptoms despite the symptoms i told her and I later repeated them to the doctor (she wrote down that my symptoms don't show up in the test as well).

All the interactions of the nurse were leading and suggestive questions that never had a follow up question further than an answer she deemed to support her idea that I don't experience what I experience. As if she has never worked with a trauma patient that predominantly seeks to minimize and deny trauma and triggering experiences by masking them inside a positive thing or twisting it into a positive thing.

Most of the sessions I felt low key attacked and doubted and like I was supposed to know things I have no way of knowing, such as what happens when I experience amnesia or who fronted during the period I experienced amnesia or if someone else in the system knows what has happened during the time of memory loss or how often memory loss occurs (I only became aware of the specific memory loss because it directly involved other people and the appointment times were incorrect compared to which appointment I thought I was going to, if it had never come up the way it did, i never would have caught on the memory loss at all). If I'm the one with the amnesia, how am I supposed to know the answer to these questions?

Or forgetting details such as what lead to my first sex or that I've attempted suicide in the past. Or that I've forgotten one of my elementary school mates (the only real one) had died a year prior to me refinding it out through fb. (I have a memorial necklace charm now, so I won't forget again). Or having ironically good memory of the layouts of the houses I grew up in, except in two of the houses, they both have the same second floor. One is real and the other one, I have no clue where I slept, where I played, who I shared my bedroom with, what happened on that floor, what that floor looked like, where my brothers slept and what did they do day to day. I have zero memories involving that second floor of that house (aside the only one of watching the neighboring house be on blazing fire), where all of us kids still lived at home. I have one hazy memory of my oldest brother (who has been later described by my other brother as generally violent and disturbed toward my other brothers, he almost strangled the third one by hanging him) and that is about him putting so much ketchup on his macaroni that even the dog couldn't stomach it when I took the plate to the dog.

The oldest brother got engaged and moved out while we still lived in that specific house.

Overall I have a good decent amount of memories (where I am either alone, with external people - mainly other children or then feeling rejected, neglected, punished, disapproved of by all family (aside my oldest brother, he's just a black presence that's never in contact with me or any of my memories) including relatives), except any trauma memories (including second hand trauma I have logically witnessed based on the hint memories and what I've been told about our family).

If im telling any "stories" it's one of Nothing bad ever happened in our family and even though I was alone and rejected by everyone, I was a happy kid. Most of my memories are from summer or sunny days.

So I am left hurt, doubted, dismissed and ridiculed even. And I'm leaving things untold that are outright misconduct toward a patient by a medical professional. And I was basically argued and condescended to til the very end and laughed at during a switch (because the doctor didn't understand what the fuck happened during the meeting with the alter who fronted and then us switching and shaking her hand thanking for her time when we were leaving). And these two were supposed to be somehow specialized with dissociative disorders, yet I had to hear how there is zero main criteria that DID has to have and how ICD-10 is just a mix of guidelines and symptoms and differs greatly from DMS criteria and that DID is a very rare disorder, relevantly new diagnosis and is very rarely diagnosed in Finland as if that makes it as rare as their diagnosing of it. And I'm just saying, other diagnosed Finnish people have publicly outright said that if you want help, you ain't gonna get a diagnosis or accurate help through public sector (where I was tested and all the above is from) but that if you want help, you're gonna have to see a private sector doctor. And I can't afford that, unfortunately and I'm so so tired and disappointed and feel unsafe with these people.

My current nurse uses misdirection by disrupting my talking during our sessions by saying irrelevant comments or demanding to finish lengthily their thought that has been established mutually already that it has nothing to do with my situation or the way I cope with things but is how she personally sees it and how it works for her/how she copes and how others cope. And she does this to shut me up. As if I wasn't there for my care and to get help with my problems but socialize with her about what she personally finds works for her and other and how sleeping badly because the brain can't clean itself from gunk can cause memory problems. And she succeeds in shutting me up because she forces me into a social mode/alter instead of listening to the parts that are connected to trauma. So I can't continue talking because I no longer even remember what. The. Fuck. I. Was. Talking. About. I guess my brain is dirty.

The doctor gave us only one diagnosis that is mixed personality disorder and it is described with profound diffusive identity, dissociative symptoms, psychotic personality symptoms.

I'm so fucking exhausted. I haven't wanted to die as many times in my entire life as I have wanted to die these past few months. I've never considered myself suicidal but I just don't want to exist like this anymore. There's no help. No one's offered anything to help with my problems. It's like they haven't heard a fucking thing. "so how have you been feeling?" is the fucking first thing the nurse wanted to focus on. When I told her I shut the whole system down after the diagnosis bc I cant deal with things (because the angry part wouldn't shut up and was making us crazy by going things over and over even though we can't do anything about it and made us completely apathetic we couldn't function) she says "isn't that a good thing?"

ISN'T THAT A GOOD THING??!

Please, I don't know, the fuck, I'm not sure more education is gonna help it. I don't have words left anymore.

[laceandhockeyskates]

Random fun (aka not) story time

Trigger warnings: sexual harassment and rape.

I’m just throwing all my personal shit up so I can move on and have it all out there. 

I feel like one thing that needs to be known about me is that when I’m at work I’m a generally kind and cheerful person (or at least a damn good actress at being that person). I work front desk at a busy hotel and I always smile and greet every single guests and wish them either a good morning or good night depending on the time of day. And yes I do make small talk with the guests and sometimes with the regulars have full on conversations. I have a few regulars that I can tell you their entire life story after just a few weeks, but that’s because while I’m at work I’m not me I’m the person they need. We have a lot of oil field workers in right now who are away from home for months so I give them a friendly cheerful confidant to talk to to feel a little less lonely. Because guess what? That’s what I’m paid to be. And the last 24 hours has shown me how men can take that and twist that to fit their narrative or what they want from me.

It started with man A. He’s a semi regular (I’ve seen him at least twice since starting in July) and has never given me a problem before, but I’ve only encountered him on second shift. I was warned by the girl on second that he was weird last night and I dismissed it because I hadn’t had that kind of encounter with him. He came down at 2 am to wait for his ride that was suppose to be there around 2:30 which was fine but I had other things to do. Instead I got roped into a conversation with him that started with either the weather or how he just became a grandfather a few weeks ago and somehow it led to him telling me he liked dating younger women and how a guy my age wouldn’t know how to pleasure me and not just sexually, and that’s the more tame comments. I won’t get into everything because it’s such a long story but it was enough that I wanted to curl into a corner because for the first time in almost 20 years I felt trapped by a man. When he went to leave he told me he was getting a hug and I knew there was no way out of it. I either willingly met him and gave him the hug that he wanted or he came behind the desk and forced it on me. When I hugged him he sniffed my neck and stroked my hair and surely that was about as weird as my night could get right? Wrong.

Enter man B. It started at breakfast bar. I noticed a few people over there about fifteen minutes before I usually open it for the day so I went over to turn on the lights and put the milk out and he turned to me and asked for a hug. I was already pretty annoyed from man A but I figured it wasn’t his fault so sure he can have a hug. I shouldn’t have. I then noticed how him and his friend were staring at me (and I should mention both men are a part of the oil field company that’s staying with us for a few months) and I just knew it wasn’t going to be good. I went back over about half an hour later to check on everything and they called me to their table to tell me something and Man B told me I’m absolutely gorgeous which was a nice compliment, yes. And his friend told me I was “lookin fine today” (which nothing was different than any other day except I might be more bloated than usual?) Man b then got up and walked over and put his arm around my shoulder but it felt more like my neck and thrusted his phone into my hands and I knew he was going to call or text me ASAP to make sure I gave him the right number. Which he did. The texts he sent were fine, he didn’t cross any line like that but I told him several times via text that I could not be texting him it was against company policy and I could lose my job if my managers found out about the messages. Which isn’t true but my boss told me to say it to get him to stop which it didn’t work. He still texted me. He kept saying we could do it outside of work and he’s really attracted to me and he really likes me which I straight up told him that he doesn’t like me. He doesn’t know me well enough to know that he likes me. He may know some minor details from me talking to his coworkers but not anything of importance. He thought he liked me because he thinks I’m pretty. Which he pushed back on and said that no he wants to get to know me because he likes me. Which I then ended the conversation telling him once again I’m not losing my job over text messages and that I was blocking his number. And I had anxiety from the time I gave him my number to even now. I barely slept because of this guy. I almost didn’t do my make up which… I love doing my make up… and then around midnight he came in and gave me a high five??? After I told him I was blocking his number?

And then there’s a mysterious man C. Who’s story is short because like I said he’s a mystery. All I know is that when my front desk manager came in for her afternoon shifted she noticed a crumbled up napkin with a number on it and a note asking me on a date that had been left with my fucking boss of all people. Thankfully she went ahead and just threw it away deciding I didnt need that in my life.

It’s just…. this is my place of employment and I can’t even put my finger on what I’ve done to encourage them. I don’t treat anyone any differently from the others minus one guy but that’s because I talk to him quite a bit because he’s a good conversationalist but I know he’s not mystery man c. Other than him though I don’t seek anyone out or feel like I put off any vibes. Yet now I’m afraid to interact with anyone in case they read it wrong and I’m afraid to be away from the desk for more than a few seconds in case someone traps me again. And I shouldn’t feel this unsafe at work. And it’s bullshit.

week later update though. Creep number 1 is no longer staying with us ever. My boss talked to his who agreed that it was for the best that he stayed away from our hotel. I’m pretty sure it was actually his boss’ idea to not place him here again. Creep number 2 has respected my wishes and kept away from me which I feel slightly bad about because he genuinely seems like a decent guy now it was just A LOT that night and I was over it and done. Creep number 3 there’s literally no update and I have no idea which one it is. 

HOWEVER there’s now a new guy that I can’t tell if he’s hitting on me or not? He’s very much doing the “I’m going to annoy you because I like you” thing I think. EVERY single shift he finds a way to talk to me. It doesn’t matter about what. If he can annoy me he’ll do it. His favorite is to ring the bell REPEATEDLY until I come to the desk and then ask me if I’m annoyed which....I am. And every single night “Come out drinking with us!!!!!! I’ll pay for you!!!!!” the problem is he never asks me on the nights that I can actually go. No let’s ask me the nights I have to go home and sleep for one reason or another. I probably still wouldn’t go but ya know. He even told me to call off just to go out with them which he’s cute don’t get me wrong and if it wasn’t for the fact that he’s a guest at where I work I’d probably actually go but idk it’s confusing and I hate these boys for making things harder on me for literally no reason because like what the fuck did I do to them.

[teddy-the-queer-wizard]

Ive got some issues and all I got was this stupid personality disorder label

Hurting myself isnt an answer.

Substituting physical for emotional pain doesn't work ive tried.

But half the time it seems like its the only way to prove things are tearing me up inside and it matters you know?

People dont take your pain seriosuly if youre not an active danger to yourself and others.

How ever since 2012 - we wont get into the shit in 2011/2010 - i have wrecked my car intentionally at least twice to get out of something,

I have cut my arm open and made up a ridiculous story that everyone bought (and still tell people because it is sort of funny and totally something 'I' would do) because it makes more sense then what really happend - I was trying to get out of a conversation i didnt want to have

I ran away to Pittsburg without a word to anyone because it was the first flight leaving that was going someplace that didn't make sense for me to go

I commited fraud - actually for the second time in my life though this time was much different and kinda a fluke - pulled all my cash, took a bua ride to virgina where I was on the street for two days before finding the homeles shelter

Didn't talk to anyone I knew for over a year with one exception that I dont want to get into

Agreed to come home to a place I didn't want to be, to go to school despite not wanting to because it was the 'right' thing to do

Stopped going to classes no matter how.hard I tried to force myself

While for a while i DID get a shrink I stopped going to see her too even though that did make every thing more bearable

I literally find it unsafe for me to drive because the urge to wreck is constant, with some minor urges to just drive away and never come back

I DID wreck my moms car because I was rushing because going to work is such a trial I will watch the time approach until its too late or almost to late before going despite WANTING to be there

Ive lost my job because I simple stopped going because I couldn't STAND them saying nice things about me when I felt like I was fucking all the things up

At my current job I sometimes do go hide in the bathroom to calm down, or have vauge out days where I'm not really there even though Im there.

Ive been really anxious when I do just about anything except when Im not and then I think I'm just psyching myself out for the attention - even though EVERYTHING in me says ANY attention is bad attention

I basically only want to sleep. Get up. Go to work. Come home. Sleep. Get up. Dinner time and or shower. Back to sleep.

Only i dont always just sleep sometimes i just lay there very much not present while I scroll through tumblr because its the only medium i dont actually have to focus on.

I dont read or write or doodle or play games or do much of anything because it makes me uncomfortable. I cant focus. Feel guilty. I should be doing xyz. Bored despite really wanting to do this.

I dont talk to my friends much and part of that is the schedule - im up at five so im usually going to bed when people are free or at work.

But honestly I can feel how much time I somehow lose or waste like a sweater thats shrunk in the wash.

I shower only once to twice a week which is about the time I finally notice im gross and realize I have to do something about it or people will care

I know some of my current issue is the season but this isnt a new thing or even a dramatic worsening of the state of affairs in my life.

This is the norm it just feels worse right now.

And that's kind of terrifying.

I have very casual disregard for my wellbeing

Im apathetic or angry or want to die...

I want to suffer in a way that's physical and people care about so I can feel valid and not broken

But i dont want help because nothing is wrong

Im being dramatic

And any attention is bad attention

Because i cant explain yes I'm suffering and this is hard for me why must you go out of your way to make it worse dad - without also feeling like oh I dont tell or show him how im hurting at all and when I do its not in a way that makes him take it seriously and never has he ever changed

And it's not just him though its hard to focus on not being upset at him because every thing I normally DONT deal with comes flooding up whenever something new happens

It's... How I don't need people to treat me like I'm glass. To be sympathetic or sad at me. But itd be nice to be able to call in because I'm too scared to go to work. Or leave early because I can't hold it together this long.

And its terrifying to know that maybe my brain just doesn't handle stress well enough to work a full eight hour shift, or five days straight of work. That it takes a full day to recover from stress and during that time Im basically useless and not going to do much in the way of chores or what not.

And though I will on the second there's also a chance the doldrums will set in and going to work will feel like an impossibility the next day.

I'm not making enough money working what I am. I cant afford to cut back.

Just like I can't afford surviving another car wreck.

Just like going to a mental institute or a hospital because I cut my arm open or stabed myself in the leg or a dozen other things or just decided to draw red lines on my arm with a paring knife because even though it doesnt help it might make me feel like my pain is real even though doing it would instantly invalidate it because its for attention that I dont want not only wouldnt help but would make my life worse.

Im just. Sick of my own bullshit. And even if I could find another shrink I like, I couldnt garentee Id keeping going - hell I dont want to go right now even though I want to - and I sure as hell couldn't afford it.

Im tired of being a burden.

I dont want to be here - I shouldnt be here - and laziness and avoidance of conflict is the only reason I havent worked on going anywhere else.

I do bad on my own. Emotionally and in the taking care of myself department. But I also cant say I'm reliable for any stretch of time. Short bursts yes but not consistantly cause brain likes to avoid and run and panic and fall apart. So it also seems pointless to plan to go anywhere because I'll fuck myself over before too long.

I'm just not okay.

And I'm tired of not being okay.

And I'm upset and emotional and maybe just maybe

If i write enough of this down Ill drown it out in the senseless rambling of my own thoughts.

[neuropathicgypsy]

I'm only going to say this once and without detail because for one it's no one's business

For two Matt Hagan used those bruises and those video tapes that were stolen to ruin my life

He showed everyone including Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin, the military security we had on base, the Chaplin, the commander, my supposed parents and more. "Who is this mysterious mustached man? Hes too old" when bull shit Matt Hagan knew exactly who he was.

And he only knew where I lived because he said he had to talk to Mark Anthony about the human trafficking and then he always ledt 10 minutes before Mark Anthony got there

Then Jesse did that shit to Mark Anthony wanting to talk to me and always left before i got there, sometimes I'd see him walking down my hall, even exiting the apartment once.

Then one time the night the cam was stolen Matt had pinned me against the apartment building and was Al demanding to me about whatever and all tried kissing me which made me shove him and run while him and Jesse laughed all loudly behind me. Which is traumatizing and I didn't leave the apartment for two weeks and didn't leave alone for over a month.

Because the police came and I went to find Mark alone. To warn him they were looking to arrest him for rape. Had they not laughed it wouldn't had bothered me. But their laughter was sick and disgusting.

So you ask me who should went and had the police after themselves.

Certainly not Mark. Who was a child although older than me.

.

The bruises did not hurt.

Yes Mark Anthony did give them to me. When he did grab my leg yes it pinched and yes it was mean but we either laughed about it or i would hit him and tell him not to pinch my leg

At that time i recall getting the bruises they did not hurt when i got them nor any time after.

All the time i have bruises and Idk where they came from and they don't hurt

2 weeks ago i had 3 fairly large bruises on my calf and Idk how i got them. And they didn't hurt.

I bruise easily without pain on my legs

But my arms have more pain and less bruising.

That is the way my body is. So yes there's dark finger mark bruises because he held his fingers there a long time. But i didnt feel any pain and i knew his hand was there. I knew he was squeezing my thigh.

I didn't stop him nor did i want to.

And that is all I have to say. And believe me, I didn't know how to explain it then.

Jane and Lily were all freaked out and so i didn't knpw how to explain it and they were trying to counsel me on abusive relationships so i had to climb on top of her to show them how i got them and Jane laughed at me.

Because we rarely had sex in front of the nanny cam.

That night we were going out and he came home early and I was smoking and watching the tv and browsing the news papers.

Yes i started smoking at like 2. Whatever. Who cares.

Plus if i was smoking it meant i could escape the human traffic factories easier because I had cigarettes and we would pretend we were lost just looking for a place.... We did a lot of reconnaissance. Incognito and did a lot of things to protect ourselves to be able to escape.

So I don't care about opinions or facts people have to judge my life.

I try to save people everyday and it means sometimes I have to murder kidnappers or smoke before I'm age 5.

So no one has a right to negatively judge me nor Mark Anthony. And what we did.

Unless you were in that exact same situation which none of you were because i was. Me not anyone else.

So I don't give a shit what anyone wants to say

I was a beautiful child with a beautiful body. And I obviously knew what pleased me and didn't.

No one has a right to judge that

I'm only writing because several people have expressed Concern about how I did get them

I would too if I saw them on a girl or a guy.

.....

I rarely do judge people. I do warn people that other people are dangerous to them.

And i do judge situations and experiences.

And i call people names but so what they aren't meant to do any thing but express my emotions and opinions about a person.

Like i said that girl calling on the daycare was a lazy bitch. That was my opinion. Fact is im a single mom too and i had to put my kid in day care before too and my kid was kidnapped from day care.

So a note to remind about diapers on the tummy isn't a big deal. If it were my daughter in a dress I would be concerned how and where people wrote on my daughter. And probably its better to write it on the arm.

But I didn't judge the girl. I judged the situation.

So as i said you could judge my situation but unless yoh were there you dont have the ability because what i did was rare

Very few people went into human traffic facilities in order to free people especially starting at age 2. Saint Luches started at 3. And hes a boy. And he was 2x my height.

And So our bodies matured faster. I was the only 2nd grader with books at school. And i was thin as you all seen.

With a mustache 10 year old Mark Anthony could drive. But he couldn't attend school at his age grade level.

So don't fucking judge us negatively

Be proud we adored each other and had proper sexual engagement. That is what the world can do for us.

And again the bruises didn't hurt.

And I'm upset and pissed off at what Matt did 30 years ago.

I don't care that people see me being me with a grown ass boy that loves me. I don't care at all.

Because there is nothing anyone can do to us.

Not now. They already did their worst to us.

I am proud of who I am and the fact that I enjoy sex with another person whom gives consent to sexual activity.

But the fact is that it is child pornography.

And I bruise easily and I was in harm from Mark Anthony. Ever. He always protected me.

When we weren't in groups. He left me a note when and where he would be. So if he was late i knew where to look for him. Because he would go in the boys only side.

And i was to call Ivana or The Orginal and Real Uncle Donald to have a car take me. Because a few times I would just go look and get a feeling and follow it and not even look for him.... Because i would always think "what is the most dangerous place?" And i would find it. So i had to take a car... Cause i got beat up on... On my face and poor Jesse didn't like the strangulation marks my scarf left him. He should never touched me nor taunted me.

And so we had a whole system. And when I saw Jesse leave my apartment, I told Mark that he was the one i saw in the park and gave the black eye to. That's why they went in and stole the camera. Matt and him. Jesse saw him with me once or twice and got him to do this and that. So that's the story they said. But they were living together and Jesse told him to go get the hook up on me unbeknownst to anyone sane.

When i went in the girls only side he waited in a truck in the street. To make sure i was okay.

That night they assaulted, me i had walked down to pick up Thai food while Mark Anthony was asleep. Cause we would eat it for two days and it only cost us $20 for 4 meals with soup and egg rolls. And we would get it when we had to shop or just shopped and wanted to rest after a long week

We usually ate it on weekends but that was a Wednesday and he had skipped work because of a chest cold.

Because getting the kidnapped people sick wasn't good because it could leak us or it would cause them to simply suffer more if they got sick.

So it would set us back and the people from the Thai restaurant would have to go in when they had news of family and the ability to relocate and they would sneak in to deliver food.

I never liked to eat at the restaurants because the workers there didn't eat and the girls i wanted them to know They were off work and would be. So simply a gesture of not eating to me meant the world would go without so they could be free.

Mark Anthony would eat to show the boys they were one and the same. He was free and they would be and should be like him.

But I always felt it distracted and weighed me down and i have an allergy to MSG. So id make a sandwich at home before i left. Id have a snack or bite or two if one of the girls asked.

One girl was Jewish and was worried about Nazi and being poisoned so she would usually give me a few bites of food to show her it was safe. Almost always. Or she would wait 20 minutes to see how the others reacted.

This is a different restaurant than i mentioned before. And different girls.

And so not eating gave me a way to watch the street if i felt unsafe or to watch the girls to get to know them individually.

Watch them laugh and talk and see how their cultures were different. I could tell how long a girl had been free before she wad kidnapped by her attitude and her voluminous self.

But not always. Some of the loudest had been in their whole lives and were happiest. Those always stayed. They didn't know how to get home.

But they always tried to get to the littlest right away to find out where their homes were so they could go home right away.

"We can get you home fastest" they would always say.

So I've had a very proud life. I'm not arrogant about it. I barely remember it. We did what we had to do to stop greed and abuse.

We returned them all. Clones. Humans. Aliens. It didn't matter. We trusted them and sent them home.

We were very young and naïve. That doesn't take from what we did. We did the best we could

So now we have learned in our years and it's a different kind of WWIII. As i said it's as good as over. But we still need to finish and we will.

All these wars, they have all been about the same, human trafficking but it was always covered

England told the Chinese to tell the Japanese the USA stole their people to be slaves. When it was England. Unknown to any, we had our own country enslaved.

So this is the first where it's been out in the open.

And we planned and planned and planned before returning to Earth, Mark Anthony and I.

So while y'all may think oh you were all young and shouldn't been having sex.

That isn't the case. Aliens should not be on our planet lying and trying to destroy us.

For more than 5 years Matt Hagan has been directly in my way. Since 2015.

Not until my daughter's intuition to change her 16th. Birthday celebration and i finally see Saint Luches again did anything fluid come back to me.

September 15 2019

And in that short amount of time we've been able to rescue about a Trillion people.

So make sure when you're pointing fingers you point the correct ones in the correct direction.

The nanny cam was, yes in front of the chair. What you can't see is the front door behind Marks big head.

You also don't see when Some one would open the door we would both slide to the floor.

Even if we were expecting someone with a key.

The Thai restaurant had a spare and Uncle Donald or Ivana had the other

My Uncle Dad knew where i was at all times had a list of apartments at his desk at work where it was safe. The apartment was closest to the bunker and restaurant just like when i would stay with Jane. Although Jane's was much closer, hers was between the restaurant and the bunker

Whilst this apartment was the apartment then the restaurant then the bunker when going North from the apartment. So it was a lonlier walk than at Jane's and how Jane and Lily could So easily insert themselves into my operation.

Because in the beginning I did walk. And it would be cold and stark. With them i felt warmth and comfort and happiness, excitement. Walking home... The sidewalk was cement like their walls, their homes they never wanted nor asked for. The buildings empty and dark.

The lights from the Thai restaurant would lighten my load and so when i got home, i was happy to be there and less sad about the girls i left behind.

The Thai restaurant's lights spilling onto the sidewalk as i huddled myself home were a beacon of hope always shining bright.

Like a lighthouse in the storm of my mind.

So none of you know what Matt Hagan did And he's all telling his group chat and asking for advise.

There is none. He set us back 30 years and started human trafficking himself.

There's nothing he can do.

There's no way i can stop him from spreading child pornography. But at least its mine and not some child being raped by an unknown man. Or some one that parades around in the sunlight as a doting father to the little girl he touched and tormented behind closed doors.

So people wanted to know what gave me the bruises. It wasn't a monster.

The monster tells a sob story once he gets caught and acts like he wants to fix it.

When really he destroyed it and he's discreetly bragging about it. And neglected to mention he himself killed the head chef and best detective at the Thai restaurant in 1997.

I know you'll never actually understand how meaningful it is to be able to be the one to help people be set free. How destructive it is to a persons soul and heart until you do it yourself.

Until you eat bites of food for a Jewish girl who is scared of Nazi ... How honoring it is to be that person that is that trusted by extreme. While girls tease her down the row about dying of the food they ate. And i tell them "eat some of hers, it's good. You must be a bad person to get the poison"

Then the girls changing and trusting and loving each other more. They all ordered different food each night and eventually the girl who teased and was a forever stay moved herself and her food down and shared off the plates with the Jewish girl. Even ordered less beef and more shrimp because the Jewish girl told the forever girl, "well if you are going to stay longest you'll eat the most and you should eat most of what you like best"

I watched the world change and get better for the most pained people, children really.

And Matt Hagan purposely destroyed it more than once over and over.

So if you run across the pornography of my childhood, dont be ashamed of it.

Watch it. See my face. See his. The desire we have for each other. See how in love we are.

And know i will remove every fucking alien from this planet and prevent any from coming in again and never will we have dead or human trafficking again for eternity.

We came back because of WWII and how Germany was acting. Killing all our humans just as they did in Africa.

Look it up. There's not a lot of Africans in the world. Once ago we all African. Every single one of us.

An Egyptian now isn't black. They're tan.

Mark Anthony was black as night. I was lighter skinned but still African.

Obviously now you can see I am stark white and still lighter than Mark Anthony.

At one time our skin was pink another time blue. So it has changed.

The whiter is the most fed up. We don't even want to resemble something on the planet. What is white? Clouds and some flowers.

No dirt is white unless it's infested with salt.

Im done. I'm all fuck you die on a second chance im not even gonna play. Some one goes near that car i got a guy burning alive in. It's gonna have an explosion to let you know to back the fuck up.

Mark Anthony will draw a line of fire that ends where it started -- a circle.. To protect his dying from being interrupted and to stop anyone from trying to interrupt.

But if you notice. Its a circle that ends where it started. Which means the world will return to its intended ways.

Me? Im all get the fuck out the way you see it? Hear it! Make sure you'll see it.

My shit is loud. But in that video posted tonight. You heard all the sounds i made. The sounds He made certain areas make you didn't. But my sex is quiet.

Which is why y'all don't get details. And if you notice, I do talk frequently about sex but i don't talk about what happens during it.

Because i can't explain it. Sex with the right person is something that is unexplainable.

It can be mimicked with anyone but its usually for a short time

But real authentic great sex with your soulmate is unexplainable with words. So I don't bother.

So. Running across my childhood pornography is a rare event.

It's not that i prefer people to see it. But since it has been posted... Don't be ashamed of me.

Don't be ashamed of you for really looking at It in depth and not feeling sexual about it. Or feeling a sleeping part of your sexuality you thought was dead.

I haven't been advocating soulmate matches constantly because I don't know what the Hell im talking about.

So when you watch it know those two people know what the Hell they are talking about. Just as I said about William and Kate.

They know, too.

So I'm not at all shamed. I'm proud of myself just as I am about William and Kate being together.

So in a way i most definitely deserve this video tonight for pointing them out.

But no one on this planet deserved what happened 30 year ago.

It's part of why Mark and i are not together now and why it took me seeing Saint Luches at a Knight event at a Renaissance Faire completely on accident.

And to look at a Disney Princess Fairytale when the Princess is hidden away until her 16th Birthday like Sleeping Beauty perhaps...

The monsters did get unleashed. But this time. They will die. Just like any real Fairytale.

Unlike Disney, my Princess is safe and will always be.

Unlike Disney it wasn't one girl the people feared for.

Its the whole world

My daughter was born on the anniversary of Martin Luther King Jr's "i have a dream" speech. And we celebrated her 16th Birthday late.

Where I once again saw Saint Luches the boy that allowed me at 2 years old to find my way through Iraq, Afghanistan, Isreal, create Al Qeada, ISIS and give Abu a name of honor.

And so Martin Luther King Jr. Sir. Your dream will be achieved.

Thanks to one little 16 year old child.

And had Matt Hagan not killed and eaten 14 of Declans soulmates we made from dirt like how the people were initially created

And i hadn't given birth to that little Annabelle for Declan. Then likely it would not happened the way it occurred.

So if you hadn't recognized a miracle before. You should now.

Regardless of what happens between now and then, as I promised Matt Hagan in Dunedin Florida when he paraded around as Dallas Frazier, "you will not get in my way"

And in 2002 when he tried to impregnate me with his semen, "you will not defeat me"

A long the way he's beaten me.

But no more.

I'm very proud of the world for fighting and standing together and surviving this traumatic lifetime we are living.

Its been A lot worse. And we are gonna make it better

That is why i am white as a cloud. Cause I will fucking kill from the Heavens if anyone succeeds in ending my life. I swear to you now and forever that i will.

Oh I also wanted to say I was pleased how Tumblr dash of the few I follow looked happier today.

Friday will be rough.

Sunday is super bowl. So keep in mind this will be the last time we watch commercials of products made by human traffic victims.

As long as we stick together and stick to the fight and resolve to remove people from those types of facilities

And we all are.

Next year super bowl will be less morose.

So, let's go 49ers!

I'm feeling Kansas (Wizard of Oz) everyday. I think we all need a break ;)

Ok ok i have a Kansas City Chiefs blanket at home cause it was on sale... And I've always liked the 49ers cause their name. And their helmet style.

So I'm impartial, really. And if i think too hard I'm gonna be all let's go WiZard of Oz!!!

So I'll remain impartial but I got a feeling on Kansas.

So let's go 49ers! Lets go!

;))

So Saturday just kick it on some downtime. Listen to music. Im sure allot of cleaning for the Sunday will occur so crank up the stereo, open the Windows and let some fresh in. Not all the Windows and not if the weather is too cold of course but let some fresh in.

We all need some fresh air.

Love y'all. Don't forget. We can't save the world if we don't love us.

💞💞💞💞💞💞💋

[thedappleddragon]

Day 68 (Tuesday May 19)

I woke up, took a shower, and prepared for the day. I did a bit of laundry and put on clean pajamas and just kind of hung out inside until I got board and went outside.

All the plants in my backyard have like exploded with green in the last week and it was warm and humid out after a rain and it was beautiful so I walked around looking at all the plant growth. There’s a climbing vine on the side of the mini barn that’s grown taller than the side and is trying to reach into the gutters. There’s a semi-circle of something with lots of little clovers that looks like a thrown for the fae. Most of the wild violets have disappeared, but little yellow flowers are sprouting up in its place. There’s a mystery plant right next to our abandoned wood patio that sprouts out in a circle and then wag stem keeps splitting off into 2 and then 2 again and again and it’s really pretty. There’s something overtaking the space along the fence where edible clovers used to be. All the small trees along the fence look so much more alive with leaves on them now. The biggest tree in my backyard and maybe on the whole street had been holding onto some leaves from fall but now it’s full and beautiful and green again. There’s a vine thing along another fence near the trampoline that flowers!! I never knew it did that! There are dandelions in my sandbox over a foot tall, but they fell over in the rain. I didn’t explore the muddy area near the swingset but there’s not a lot over there usually aside from one of my brothers’ trees. The clover patches are bouncing back too and growing some FAT clovers. They’re not the same kind as the little yellow-y ones near the fae thrown or the back fence, they’re darker with a whiter band on the leaf if that makes sense. The grass has gotten long and I love it. I love how much different plant life is in my backyard and I wish my dad would never mow it.

Mentions of dead animals in this next paragraph, so be warned. Vulture culture kind of stuff.

Along with all the greenery in my backyard, I’ve been conducting an experiment. A while ago, I found a mouse that my cat had killed when she went into the garage, and instead of throwing it in the trash, I threw it into the backyard near the door where I could find it later. I left it to decompose so I could get the skull later, but I wish I had left it in an open container instead of on the dirt because it got rained on and made it harder to find today. I found the skull and some of the other bones, but I didn’t particularly care about those. I DIDNT TOUCH IT WITH MY HANDS that would be gross and unsafe probably. I used a stick. I grabbed a takeout lid and nudged it on there so I could gently slosh it in a puddle to get the mud and excess tissue off. I was amazed with how tiny the teeth were... I don’t think the skull was fully in tact, and some parts looked thin and almost see-through. Idk if that means anything, but it looked different than what I looked up online later. I left the skull on the lid and placed it somewhere it would be protected outside if it stormed later and unseen in case anyone else went outside. I went inside and washed my hand VERY thoroughly several times with soap and water and hand sanitizer, even though I didn’t touch anything. Better safe than sorry.

After hanging out in my backyard, I started getting ready for my friend’s drive-by birthday party parade. I didn’t really know what to expect. A bunch of her friends showed up to a park near her house to meet up beforehand and put streamers on our cars and talk for a little bit. It was such a fun time just being able to see people in person again. (We we’re keeping our distance and everyone had masks btw) I felt so happy and everything almost felt normal for a bit and I teared up ngl. It was also bittersweet because I wanted nothing more than to give some of those people a hug but I knew I couldn’t. We were joking around and hanging out and talking waiting for everyone to arrive, and then we all headed for our cars. As we drive down the street, I was so exited to see her reaction, because it was a surprise party. She was so happy she cried which made me super happy and I was so glad to see her and tell her I love her in person and I handed her the present and card I made and grabbed her hand for a second (I washed my hands before I went) and wished her a happy birthday and drove off and that was that. She texted my later telling me how much she loved her gift and it made me happy all over again.

When I got home, I had a calculus final to do. The teacher made us download a browser that didn’t let you use anything in the background while taking the test but I had my other laptop and my phone and looked up how to do everything. I thought I was doing great and only missing like 2 questions out of 25 but when I turned it in I got a 16/25 :( thankfully it was on a curve so I got a c instead of an f. Then my dad brought home subway and I worked on all my other work for the day and realized that my teacher changed the due date for the final essay to Thursday instead of next Monday so that made me mad and I had to immediately start reading the book to finish it. I’ve only read 3 more chapters because this book is kind of boring. Theoretically I could do one of the prompts from earlier in the book but i guess I’ll finish it >:/

While I was taking a break from reading I remembered my old math teacher from freshman year who committed suicide last semester. I got emotional thinking about he didn’t get to see me graduate and I wouldn’t get to go to the winter break party he held every year for alumni. I wanted to tell him I’m sorry, but obviously I can’t do that. But then I started writing this and got really happy thinking about my friend’s birthday again.

[fadingpersoncollectorstuff-blog]

APPROXIMATELY, how high would insurance be on a 16 year old male driver with a manual Evo X as a first car?

"APPROXIMATELY, how high would insurance be on a 16 year old male driver with a manual Evo X as a first car?

I just turned 16 and i am about to get my license.I just want an estimate like 200-300 or 300-400 or 400-500, etc. My brother is 18 and currently has an Evo and is paying ~ 500 a month for his insurance but has a terrible driving record. Totaled his car and another persons (completely his fault) speeding tickets, unsafe turn ticket. and a bunch of parking tickets. And please dont give me an answer like youre gonna kill urself or evo is too fast for a first car and too hard to learn stick in an evo because the past 8 months i have been driving my brothers STICK Evo quite alot and have absolutely no problem driving it.

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://freecarinsurance.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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or is this just a general thought among motorists?

Car insurance questions (Still on parent's plan)?

I have a few questions... Is there a set age where I can no longer be on my mom's car insurance? Or is it completely up to her? For example can two adults (both in their 40's) be on the same insurance? I am 19. I currently live with my mom. If I were to move out, can I still be on her insurance? If I don't go to college, can I still be on her insurance? I heard you need to be a full time student to be on a parent's insurance? If I were to buy a car, would it have to be in her name?""

'occasional driver' Car insurance?

Hi, I'm 18 and I'll be heading off to college in the fall and so won't be home very often. However when I am home I'd like to be insured on my dads car. I don't see the point in having to pay the same price for car insurance as someone who drives almost daily, so I wanted to know if there was a type of car insurance for the 'occasional' driver. I'll only be home on vacations, and even then I won't be driving all the time, but I really need a car insurance for when I do drive, mostly summers.""

""Friend hit my car, will my insurance go up?

Alright well tonight I was doing some work on my friends car so I had his car up on some ramps and my car was parked behind. Well for some reason he felt it nessessary to back up as far as he could from the ramps and ended up backing right up into my car. It damaged the bumper pretty well so i'd like to have it repaired. My questions are one will my insurance rise if I get it repaired under his insurance? And will his insurance go up because of it? If so how much? I live in Arizona if that is of any help

Think of buying a catagory D car which is an insurance write off?

I have just been to view a 2005 Nissan Micra with 13100 on the clock the car had a crush which damage the tail gate and the bumper both have been replaced to a high standard. The car would be worth 5000 but is selling for 2200. Everything seems good at 1st glance but i am concerned about insurance and weather or not it's a good ideal to take the gamble. The seller showd me the before and after pictures of the car and it seemed to fit wot he was saying. He also has a valied MOT which is a month old I don't plan on selling the car if i buy it. How much damage can a knock do to the front of the vehicle or any of the important parts? Please can someone advise wot the best thing would be to do?

How much would it cost for monthly insurance on a Dodge Viper 2009?

Im doing a math project at school and we have to buy a car. What would the approximate cost be to insure it monthly?

What is the best maternity health insurance in Georgia??

I have insurance through my company, in which I pay half.. My deductible is $2500.00 till January then changes to $2000.00... Im already paying my Doctor $900.00 for a Pre-Delivery fee which will come out of my deductible. Then after that is met I will pay 20% of everthing else... Any advice will be great...""

Is van business insurance expensive?

My van is insured at the minute but as an electrician will i require business insurance and willit be much more

What affordable medical insurance can I get for my income in Texas?

My husband and I only make between 1400-2000 a month from working. We have NO medical insurance because his company wants to charge an arm and a leg for me just to be included. I am currently having some high blood pressure problems and kidney problems but I do not have insurance to go for a visit. Im desperately trying to find a program or insurance affordable for us so I can get checked up- NOW I am NOT qualified for Adult Medicade-we make too much, but private insurance is too expensive for our budget. We have a free clinic but there is a 3-4 month wait to see a doctor. Can anyone else please help point to a direction that may help my situation? Like I said Im desperate enough to ask the public.""

Car insurance claim for a parked car?

I hit a parked car & I would like to pay for this myself rather than going through my insurance. I would rather send the car to a garage of my choice but the guy want his garage to fix his car. His garage is asking me to give the repair cost to the guy I hit - not go through the books. I do not feel comfortable doing this. where do I stand?

Should we have whole life insurance?

My husband is 26 yrs old and he bought whole life insurance. I tried to tell him to get term sicne we are so young, but he wouldn't listen. Can anyone help me?""

What is a cheap insurance?

I am a student and i dont want to pay a lot for car insurance i want the cheapest

APPROXIMATELY, how high would insurance be on a 16 year old male driver with a manual Evo X as a first car?

I just turned 16 and i am about to get my license.I just want an estimate like 200-300 or 300-400 or 400-500, etc. My brother is 18 and currently has an Evo and is paying ~ 500 a month for his insurance but has a terrible driving record. Totaled his car and another persons (completely his fault) speeding tickets, unsafe turn ticket. and a bunch of parking tickets. And please dont give me an answer like youre gonna kill urself or evo is too fast for a first car and too hard to learn stick in an evo because the past 8 months i have been driving my brothers STICK Evo quite alot and have absolutely no problem driving it.

What car insurance company in the UK will insure an american licence? I cant find one to insure me on my FL?

Just moved to the UK for one year and need car insurance, cant find a company to insure me, tried all the big ones but I know there is some out there!!""

If you accidentally hit someone with your car how much does your insurance premium increase?

By hit someone, I mean a pedestrian.""

Full Coverage Insurance on 08 Camry?

I am about to lease my first car. I have heard that I need full coverage insurance, but am a little unsure about what this means. I have gotten quotes from several insurance companies, but I don't really understand the coverage limits that they have. A few companies have easy coverage selections (ex: a high, medium, or low degree of protection). Does full coverage mean that I would need the highest degree of protection?""

Cheapest car insurance?

Whats the cheapest car insurance for a teenager? Permit .....

Are SUV's usually high in insurance for teens?

I've been told that I should wait a little longer before i can get a faster car, and I was just wondering whether insurance for an suv would be high, in my case, for an inexperienced driver, (16). Parents are thinking of buying an Fj cruiser and willing to give it to me when i get my liscense.""

My insurance quotes make no sense...?

I've been checking out some insurance quotes, I did a few thru progressive and got some weird results. First time, on a 2002 BMW M3 I got quoted $140/mo for full coverage (I'm 18, completely clean record), went back through to see if I could get the same result: got $199/mo, same information and everything. Why the change? And THEN (this is where it gets weird...) I checked my 97 Corolla (my DD/beater) and I did only that car on the quote, they wanted $240/mo. I'm really confused right now. Any advice?""

Will my inusrance go up with a speeding ticket?

The other day i was driving and got pulled over for going 80 on a 65. i live California. I am 19, a student, and this is my first ticket ever. I was wondering if my insurance would go up. i wanted to hide it from my parents, if insurance goes up then i wouldnt be able to hide it. Also, anyone know what it would cost me? If i do driving school to erase it, would it still make insurance go up?""

17 Year Old Insurance Question..?

What would be the average cost to insure any type of vehicle to a 17 year old foreign male (has no SSN, on a special permit VISA to live in the states)? I have around 12k to spend on the car, so i was looking at a few cars and the 2002 Audi TT (225hp, 6 speed M/T, 2-door sports coupe) seems to be the best car i can get with that money. Now ofcourse, i don't know what the fees are going to be like and it doesn't help that im a foreign student living here because my dad moved here, don't have a SSN/greencard etc (i have a special permit VISA for residence). will this impact my insurance a lot since im not a citizen of the U.S.? and so..how much would it really cost to insure an Audi TT as a 17 year old, honor role student who will complete the driver safety course, have same insurance as family policy, most likely be accident free (for state farm insurance) and have completed the steer clear driver's discount program? and some other general questions, what would be the difference in insurance premiums if instead i chose a 4-door sedan like a Honda Civic (2005)? I tried getting quotes from State Farm (said i was 18 instead), they got me at hte basic plan for $350/month for 2002 Audi TT and $375/month for a Civic 2005. Anyways to reduce that (those prices were with most discounts except the family plan)?""

Motorcycle Insurance costs amd monthly payments on a motorcycle for a 17 year old male?

Ok, I know you're just going to tell me that I need to have a car first or that I'm too young to have a motorcycle and I need experience and all that ****. But I'm 17 and I want a Honda Shadow Spirit 750 (which I've been told is a great starter bike) I am a safe and cautious driver, if I get one I'll have a helmet, gloves, pants, jacket, boots, etc. I'll take a class for it (which is required in the state of Fl), I've also already had driver's ed last year and I may take another one. I'm th exact opposite of the douche bag teenager on a crotch rocket with no gear weaving in and out through taffic going 90mph in a 45mph zone. In the state of Fl legally you don't need insurance for a motorcycle but I'll have it anyways. I was thinking of maybe putting down $2-3000 and getting a loan for the rest. My mom said that with a load I have to have full comprehensive coverage because I don't own the bike yet. Can you give me an estimate of how much the insurance would cost for a 17 year old male with driving classes and gear and a 3.8GPA, and I'm only going to school to home or to school to work then home (I don't get out much because I don't have many friends) and I have State-Farm. Also how much do you think the monthly payments will be? I'm working on getting 2 jobs. Please and thank you. And please don't be a douche or try and shoot me down or whatever to make yourself feel better about yourself, just please answer my question to the fullest :)""

Where can I get the best car insurance rates?

I have been on the same plan for 10 years now and they charge $165 each month which is ridiculous. Any idea what is the best company to get a better insurance rate?

Finding Health Insurance is impossible?

Trying to find health insurance for myself and my daughter is impossible. We arrived into the country in December 2011. I am now a permanent resident, my daughter (2) is a a US Citizen. We live in California. Have tried applying but I get declined due to the non-resident clause that most insurance companies have. And then because I get declined I can't get my daughter covered, as well. Have also been reading that most companies don't do child only policies. Just can't win. Anyone here, got any advice or been through this. Would like to get some coverage, we are both healthy without existing conditions, but its the what if's, and as she is 2, I would like to know that I can go to the doctor""

How and where do i find 'cheaper' car insurance? UK?

Im 20 , female and I will be 21 by time I get a car (hopefully). I really don't know where to find cheaper insurance. I tried confused.com but the max price is 3000! my friends who are younger than me get it at like 1500 and I don't know why or how. Also if I offer to pay the insurance in one lump sum , would it be cheaper? I'm looking for a Vauxhall corsa between 1.1 and 1.2 or maybe even lower engine. What other ways to get a cheaper quote? Please help. Driving is all I ever wanted to do and I might have a chance at it in this summer.""

What is a cheap good health insurance company in CA?

hi im 15 years old and i need health insurance for sports and i also need doctor check ups and dental maybe even eye check ups, my parents and i cannot find a company that is cheap and just for me. what is a cheap but good company to go with for health insurance in california?""

Price of car insurance?

say im 17 and buying my first car and its a 2003 bmw how much will insurance cost for it per month?

""How much does insurance cost on a rental car?, I need a rough estimate, please help?""

it's in portland if that makes a difference, thanks""

""50cc Scooter, insurance?""

Hi, I have just passed my CBT for a 50cc scooter and hold a provisional licence for the UK. I am 16 and passed the CBT on 24th August. I am looking to buy a 49/50cc scooter but I have found that the insurance is extremeley expensive. I have looked around and filled in quotes from comparethemarket.com and the Post Office but the insurance I want (third party fire and theft) always seems to come out at around 300 a year! I know that some people pay only 50 a year for their 50cc insurance. Does anyone know where to get a better deal? Or does anyone have any tips? Thanks""

Changing car while paying monthly for car insurance?

I still have like 9 months to pay on my insurance but i want to change car how can i do it or cant i ?

Names of Cheap insurance companies in ireland that insure motorbikes??

Just bought a new moterbike and am being quoted mad prices,its only a 125,it shouldn't be much more than 1000,but im being quoted 1600 by quinn direct? anybody know where i could get it cheaper??""

How will a speeding ticket going 9 over affect me personally and insurance wise?

Hi, i just got my first speeding ticket going 9 over 40, the cop said usually it would not effect my insurance but if not how will it affect me? If i pay the ticket and not call my insurance will that be that and it will be over? Please help""

Approximately how much is Home Owners Insurance?

I'm sure it varies by location and value of the house, but approximately how much is homeowners insurance?""

Can I change car insurance in the middle of a claim?

I bought a different car and want to change insurance companies but was iin an accident and they are currently paying my hospital bills. It wasn't my fault, as I was rear ended. Can I still find a cheaper insurance for the new car?""

How much is motorcycle insurance per month on average?

The kicker: I'm only 18 and will be on my own policy, not my parents. I am at the top of my class, no tickets or anything, etc. (if any of that helps).""

Can I drop my non-owners insurance policy after I get my revoked license back?

I got a DWAI a while ago, and I will be eligible to reapply for a license soon. In order to do this, I have to apply for non-owner's car insurance and fill out an SR-22 form. After I have gotten my license back, can I legally drop the non-owner's insurance? I have never owned a car or had insurance before, so I have no idea how car insurance policies work.""

What happens if you get pulled over without insurance?

You see I am an awesome driver. I never get in an accident because I am always well aware of my surroundings. I realized that for the past five years of owning my truck, I have spent over 10 times it's worth in insurance, and never once needed it, ever. No accidents, and no getting pulled over. Isn't insurance a waste of money for me? I figured I could just put the money I would normally spend on insurance, in the bank for the same purpose, then if I need it I can take it out. If the truck dies first, I put the money towards a new car. Is this such a bad idea?""

Can i getmy licence removed and get my vehicle inspected and get my car insurance on the same day?

ok here is the dilemma im a marine stationed at camp lejuene and im going back to new york in a few days. i need to get my license and my registration, inspection and car insurance in a few days(like 3)will my license go right into the system so i can go call my insurance company (usaa) and get insurance on it the same day then go back to the DVM and get the car registration. thxs kinda freaking bout this""

APPROXIMATELY, how high would insurance be on a 16 year old male driver with a manual Evo X as a first car?

I just turned 16 and i am about to get my license.I just want an estimate like 200-300 or 300-400 or 400-500, etc. My brother is 18 and currently has an Evo and is paying ~ 500 a month for his insurance but has a terrible driving record. Totaled his car and another persons (completely his fault) speeding tickets, unsafe turn ticket. and a bunch of parking tickets. And please dont give me an answer like youre gonna kill urself or evo is too fast for a first car and too hard to learn stick in an evo because the past 8 months i have been driving my brothers STICK Evo quite alot and have absolutely no problem driving it.

What does health and medical insurance cover?

I know this insurance is usually offered by your employee. What does it usually cover other than like hospital stays. How much pay would the insurance cover

Can i get car insurance at an affordable rate after declaring bankruptcy?

Can i get car insurance at an affordable rate after declaring bankruptcy?

Where to get kids checkups when you don't have insurance?

My twins are 2.5 years old, and because of changes in our employments, currently do not have health insurance. When we did it didn't cover much, but it did cover yearly checkups. ...show more""

What is home owners insurance like in Florida?

I am thinking of purchasing a home in the Kissimmee area that is around $140,000. Some people have told me that homeowners insurance and additionally flood and hurricane additions to my insurance is very very expensive. Can someone give me an example of their real life insurance price that includes flood or hurricane? Please reply only if you have first hand experience in Florida. Preferably in the Kissimmee or Orlando area.""

Insurance for 17 year old female?

Hello, I wanted to know what the price would be ranging between for a car that probably would have been made in the year 2000. I haven't started lessons yet but i will be by october and wanted to get a rough idea. Also i heard that there is a insurance that you can get that is cheap but you're not allowed to go out after 11pm at night or something. Is this true? if so what would the price be roughly?""

Health insurance options for a college student?

One of my best friends is headed off to college, but she doesn't have health insurance, and her parents won't allow her to stay on theirs (they can't afford it, either). I'm concerned for her and obviously want to know if there are some options for her to get some affordable but decent health insurance. What are her options? For the sake of this question, assume that her university does NOT provide their own student health care options. Thanks in advance!""

Who offers cheapest auto insurance for 25 year old males in la?

give insurance estimates

Does GEICO stand for General Electric Insurance Company?

Does GEICO stand for General Electric Insurance Company?

Why are my wife's health insurance rates going up?

2 days after Obama signed the new health care law, my wife received and email from her health insurance company. Her monthly rates, and her deductible will be going up. Ah.. wait a minute... isn't the new health care law supposed to make health insurance more affordable????""

I have title to my exes car and pay their insurance. How do I get out of it?

Me and my girl broke up a year and a half ago. She's a real piece of work. We lived together for 3 years and had everything is each others names. Utility bills, cell phone bills etc. She never paid any of her bills on time and it destroyed her credit. I signed for a car for her because she's had multiple DUI's and didn't have the credit to get her own. She made the payments on it and I never put any money down. The car title is in my name and she has paid it off. She can't get insurance because of the DUI's. I just want to be done with it so I don't have to deal with her anymore but she wants me to hold off until she finished her DUI classes to get a reasonable rate on insurance. She's been telling me the same thing for a year plus. I'm not even sure if she's taken or taking these classes yet or not. I asked her about it the other day and she never responded to me. I had left her a voicemail and she never called me back. This really pisses me off. So my question is if I sign the title and make her sign it as well do I have any more resposibility with the automobile? I just want to drop her from my insurance and give her the title. Is she wrecks or, god forbid, kills someone while driving am I liable for anything?""

How do i get car insurance if i dont have a car???

i want to finance a car but i cant do that without insurance, how do i get insurance without a car?""

Insurance on salvages autos? hw much?

i was just wondering if its possible to get insurance if i buy a salvage car from private seller? how much would the rates be? anybody has any idea? is it possible to get comprehensive insurance for a salvage car? well you cant get insured then how can you drive the car around ! doesnt make anysense right!?

""How much is Insurance on Fireworks up to $2,000,000.00 in Maine?""

Thinking about opening up a Fireworks shop and want to know how much I'm looking at a year for insurance need a policy with the min $2,000,000.00.""

When you do not have car insurance in California then ONLY IF YOU GET CAUGHT?

by someone it's a problem right, or is it a problem as soon as your car insurance stops for example, only if someone who does not have car insurance gets into an accident then everyone is wondering about it right, or if you had car insurance and could not afford the bills anymore do they tell DMV and then you're in trouble immediately""

How much would car insurance be..?

BALL PARK figures, if anyone knows how much car insurance would be for an Acura LSX 2014? MSRP is in the $30k I guess the record would be clean however I am only 21. Would it be good to also add my mother if that helps lower the cost? I haven't had a new car before and it's all new..""

""Pregnant with no health insurance, Texas?""

Is anyone familiar with Texas Department of Health and Human Services. I just found out I am pregnant yesterday, two days ago my husband was laid off work. His old company added an HSA for us in December and we were under the impression everything was fine with employment if they added this for our family. I finally had a family HSA as of 1/1/12 and then on 1/3/12 it was taken away. He worked 90 hours on his last paycheck almost the most of the year, and was told work is slow so he was being laid off. They also added back matching 401k this year too, yep! We have been trying for years and had no idea this would happen this way. It is just crazy! So I found out on the website for HHS of Texas the income level for benefits. I am right there underneath the level for 2 people. Do they include the unborn child as a 3rd family member yet? Also I saw that you have to list assest out like vehicles. We have two cars and that is it. We make payments on both of them, so is it possible they will deny us since we have these assets. Other than those we have no other assets. But I remember my mom being denied for SSI on my brother due to assets so I am worried. Please can anyone help ease my mind?""

How Much for a 17 year old to have full coverage on a car?

I REALLY dont wanna be on my dads insurance anymore, because i want to get a car of MY own in MY name and im not sure what to do because of how much full coverage would cost for myself. Any suggestions. Can i have my car in my name and be on somebody elses insurance? or what? i just cant pay 350 a month for full coverage!""

What's the best individual health/dental insurance that i can purchase?

What's the best individual health/dental insurance that i can purchase?

Health & dental insurance?

who has the best health & dental insurance for a small business of less than 10 people?

Why do people expect medical insurance to pay for everything?

Auto insurance doesn't pay for oil changes. Homeowners insurance doesn't pay for remodeling.

How much would my insurance be?

How much would it be for a 20 year old with a honda civic si,live in NY? Im in high school i make honor role every time, never been in trouble, play football lacrosse and basketball if that matters lol and i live in a rural area.""

How much pain and suffering from my auto accident?

In Feb (2 months ago) I was rear ended at an intersection by a drunk driver. It was 3pm, I was on my way to class, and he hit me out of nowhere. This was his second offense. He was arrested that day on DUI/drug charges. He was fully insured by Nationwide Insurance. Turns out he has a LONG list of driving violations, speeding tickets, and such. I was taken by ambulance to the hospital, and then went again the next day. I have been to my medical doctor and chiropractor since then. I had never been in the hospital before, or to a chiropractor, and my neck/back are now messed up. I have had a MRI, and a ton of prescription. I have lost the natural curve in my neck, my vertebra are out of alignment, and I am having BAD, BAD headaches. I had $3000 damage to my car, and over $5000 in medical bills. How much pain and suffering can I get? Until this point, I was healthy, and fit. Since then, I cant work out at the gym, and Im getting headaches which affect my concentration, and sometimes my vision... Im only 24. What am I entitled too?""

Help on getting cheap car insurance for young drivers?

I know about multicar but i cant do that, i know about named drivers etc but is there any way i can get a decent insurance quote for a 17 year old because ive been getting 15000 quid for quotes recently. Dont tell me you cant do it thats not gonna help me, thanks""

How much do you think my motorcycle insurance will be?

I am getting the CBR125R 2009 HONDA! It's going to be black. I'm a 16 year old girl, and the bike costs $3,599.00 . How much do you think my insurance will be? All together what will it possibly total up to? Thank you!""

What is the average car insurance payment for a 20 year old female?

Im thinking of purchasing a 2008 dodge avenger. Ive never had car insurance in my own name before. I have no accidents on my record and nothing else in my name. Also, i have no major violations.""

APPROXIMATELY, how high would insurance be on a 16 year old male driver with a manual Evo X as a first car?

I just turned 16 and i am about to get my license.I just want an estimate like 200-300 or 300-400 or 400-500, etc. My brother is 18 and currently has an Evo and is paying ~ 500 a month for his insurance but has a terrible driving record. Totaled his car and another persons (completely his fault) speeding tickets, unsafe turn ticket. and a bunch of parking tickets. And please dont give me an answer like youre gonna kill urself or evo is too fast for a first car and too hard to learn stick in an evo because the past 8 months i have been driving my brothers STICK Evo quite alot and have absolutely no problem driving it.

What is the cheapest car to insure for a 17 year old?

me and my Dad would like to know how much car insurance would be for a 17 year old and what would be the cheapest car. Now... I know theres no such thing as cheap car insurance but here's the details... I have already been on the road for a year (moped) I am doing my test in July (I'm not 17 yet but we just want some rough estimates) I will be insured on my dads insurance as a second driver (It's not fraud, its perfectly legal because its an option on most car insurance websites) Thanks so much for the help, George.""

Maternity Health Insurance?

I am in the state of MI..I am looking for some really good health insurance for pregnant women..I already spoke to blue cross blue shield and all there plans only cover the delivery..I need something affordable that covers everything from prenatal-going home from hospital..It doesnt have to cover it 100% but at least the majority. Thank you

How much would it cost to make an insurance comparison site?

I live in a place that doesn't currently have a good insurance comparison site. I have little experience with website design and costing. I would be looking for a good quality site, comparing 4 markets and 6-8 companies for each.""

Has all 2ltr cars got the same cost in insurance for a 17 year old?

Has all 2ltr cars got the same cost in insurance for a 17 year old?

What is the best type of car to get for cheaper insurance?

What is the best type of car to get for cheaper insurance?

How can USA force me to buy health insurance?

It's incredibly unconstitutional and uncapitalist If I find a way to self-fund my healthcare and don't need to rely on an insurance company, Govt can FORCE me against my will with fines and penalties to engage in business with big insurance?????? Are you kidding?!!!! What country are we living under?""

Insurance quote for my car?

I looked all over the place and insurance is very expensive or me. I am 17 years old. The car is a 1998 Mitsubishi eclipse gs 2 door. The car is under my moms name. I am currently under state farm and I qualify or the good student discount and safe driver discount on another car. I am currently paying 400 dollars for that car.

Do you need insurance for a driver's permit?

I'm hearing different things from all different places and rather than sifting through all of the crap at the dmvedu website I thought I'd ask you guys and get a straight answer. Do I need insurance to get my permit, or just for my liscense? I live in California, by the way, if that makes any difference with the law.""

""Which is better, Term Insurance or Whole Life Insurance?""

Say you're newly married and the wife is pregnant. You have just bought a home and have a large mortgage. Which kind of insurance is best for a family, Term Insurance or Whole Life Insurance?""

Health Insurance?!?!?

I am having to get my own health insurance for the first time. Can someone help me figure all of this out? What should I be looking for? I am young and healthy, so I would not like to pay that much, but I would like to feel confidant in my coverage. Also, I will need dental coverage-any info there?? Thanks so much!""

Best place for cheap car insurance?

I can only think of MoneySupermarket.co.uk, which other companies do searches for the cheapest car?! Best quote ive had is 506 for a 1st car, 3years with licence, 22year old female, Ford Fiesta 2001, Fully Comphensive.... ... Wondering if I can find something better?! Or is that the best around? Cheers x""

Rental car insurance?

I just rented a car from Budget and it being my first rental, I wasn't exactly sure of all the terms and conditions... unbeknownst to me I could have used my own full coverage insurance with me. I flew out of state and rented a car for the wedding and just assumed I would need to buy their insurance policy, no one ever told me different. I did take my policy with me, but was never asked for that information. Then I get the bill back and they charged me 32.50 a day! Has anyone ever had this happen and how lenient are they if you've already returned the rental? Anything I can do? I'm back at work and won't be able to call in until this afternoon, just wanted some feedback. Thanks in advance.""

I need cheap car insurance in New York City?

I need cheap (FULL) coverage for a financed vehicle in the NEw York Area...I've tried the popular sites...any leads?

When should I buy insurance?

I want to buy a used car from a dealer. So can I drive the car home, and then buy insurance? Or I should buy the car and insurance at the same time? First time to buy a car.""

Got a ticket and insurance doubled NJ?

I got a ticket on my very first day of driving for an illegal left turn (one of those that you cant make during certain hours unless you are a resident of the street). I got the ticket with 3 points, i went to court and paid off all 3 points and got unsafe driving under my name hoping that it wouldn't affect my insurance, which was under my dads name (Allstate). Even with paying off the points my insurance still doubled. Now my question is, is there anything I can do to lower my insurance? Maybe I can take a course somewhere. Are me and my dad better off looking for a new insurance company? Maybe i should drop my car from my insurance and taking the bus again? If there isn't anything I can do, how long will it take for my insurance to drop again? Right now we are all in hard times and i made it much worse for my family, any help would be greatly appreciated.""

What insurance company insures Bugatti Veyrons?

I bought a bugatti about 2 months ago and everytime I get pulled over by the cops i get a ticket for no insurance and I can't find a company that covera my cars! Help please

Do you need motorcycle insurance in the state of Tennessee?

As a Tennesseean, I was wondering if motorcycle insurance is necessary in order to ride in the state.""

Where can students get cheap car insurance from people who don't automatically make you out to be boy racers?

Where can students get cheap car insurance from people who don't automatically make you out to be boy racers?

How much will cost to insure a mustang gt. I'm 20 years old.?

I'm looking to buy a 94 mustang gt and I was wondering how much it would cost me under my father policy. I'm 20 years old, I'm a guy and I have a good driving record. What would be the range on how much it would cost me. Don't say a lot because I know it will obviously be a lot that's why I'm asking the question.""

Where can I find out about my health insurance?

My school said that if I drop courses making me a part time student, it could affect my health insurance. How do I find out about my health insurance?""

""Auto, Home, Renters, Life Insurance?""

Okay I am working on a budget project for a class, and one of the requirements is to find the costs of insurance. So my question is what would the average rate for auto, home, renters and life insurance for a married individual in early to mid 20's?""

""How can I find affordable health insurance that covers chiropractic adjustments, acupuncture, or both?""

I live in Colorado. I only make slightly above minimum wage. I am not eligible for health care benefits through work. I have a chronic issue and am in pain if I do not go. I spend $250 on chiropractic and $250 on acupuncture for a grand total of $500 a month. Is there a health insurance plan that could cover either one or both kinds of treatments for less than $500 a month? If not, I will just continue to pay out of pocket although it is very expensive.""

Can i get insurance now?

I recently had my wisdom teeth taken out, and they said i needed to come back and get my teeth cleaned, and they said I'm gonna need some fillings or something, but there wasn't another appointment until June.. well i don't have dental insurance, so i had to pay for this all on credit cards, which is do-able i guess, since we dint use those cards for anything else, but i was wondering could i get dental insurance between now and then? or would it not cover the appointment thats already scheduled? where can i find affordable isurance?""

Pregnant with no insurance?

I recently moved and I no longer have health insurance. I am 33 weeks pregnant. I do not qualify for Medicaid. are there any other inexpensive options? I am currently working part time but I won't be working for much longer.

Lloyds car insurance?

ive just bought a new car and am wondering if its possible to transfer my old car insurance to this new car? or do i have to cancel that policy and make a new one? will there be any extra costs if i can transfer etc. any advice appreciated xx

APPROXIMATELY, how high would insurance be on a 16 year old male driver with a manual Evo X as a first car?

I just turned 16 and i am about to get my license.I just want an estimate like 200-300 or 300-400 or 400-500, etc. My brother is 18 and currently has an Evo and is paying ~ 500 a month for his insurance but has a terrible driving record. Totaled his car and another persons (completely his fault) speeding tickets, unsafe turn ticket. and a bunch of parking tickets. And please dont give me an answer like youre gonna kill urself or evo is too fast for a first car and too hard to learn stick in an evo because the past 8 months i have been driving my brothers STICK Evo quite alot and have absolutely no problem driving it.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/insurance-question-help-helen-henderson"

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The primal thrill of sharks: the emotional case for rewilding the sea

I was delighted to see giant basking sharks on a recent trip to Scotland, but such moments of wonder are rare. Creating fishing reserves would allow our oceans to recover and preserve this incredible feeling

I believe we possess a ghost psyche: a set of capacities that helped secure our survival in more dangerous times, but that now are vestigial. I picture this as a seam of intense emotion, buried so deeply in our minds that we can seldom find it.

I believe this because, on rare occasions in all cases when immersed in the living world I have been confronted with a set of feelings that are so rich, raw and thrilling, so different from anything else I know, but at the same time so strangely familiar, that I have had no way of reconciling them with the rest of my emotional life. I believe that on these occasions I have inadvertently triggered a kind of genetic memory, an ancient adaptation to the circumstances that once shaped our lives.

I encountered it one day when, roaming through a wood, I came across a deer that had just died and foolishly, deciding to take it home hauled it on to my shoulders. I felt it when stalking up a tidal channel with a spear, looking for flounders, and when I came face to face with a bison on a forest path in Poland. I experienced it when I first saw a minke whale in Scotland, and when a dolphin leapt over my boat in Cardigan Bay. And I felt it last summer in the Hebrides, kayaking with basking sharks.

The sharks were what drew me, my family and some friends to a small island in the Inner Hebrides. (I have chosen not to name it, since it is small enough to be overwhelmed easily and the ecology is sensitive. In any case, there are places throughout the islands where you can enjoy similar experiences.) Every year, sharks come to the islands, sometimes in ones and twos, occasionally in vast packs. A friend lent us his kayaks and advised us to hunt for them in the sound between the island and its eastern neighbour. As the tide rips through the strait, it funnels the plankton on which the sharks feed into dense swarms.

You can see that there is something special about the sound even before you take to the water. From the beach, I watched gannets pluming into the sea and long lines of cormorants paddling down the tide. Seals swam around the rocky islands close to the shore. Exploring the sound with a fishing rod, I found shoals of saithe (sometimes called coley or coalfish) 300 metres long. Though handliners and lobster potters work here, trawling is banned, because a fibre-optic cable runs between the islands. There is a hint of what the seas around Britain once among the richest in the world used to be like, and could be like again.

I didnt know what I was looking for until I saw it. A flash of light, bouncing across a mile of sea, cut through the sparkle of the waves like a Morse lamp. The sun was reflecting off something that stood perpendicular to the water, something that came and went. It could only have been a fin. I marked the spot in my mind and paddled across the sound at ramming speed.

The sharks were what drew me … Monbiot on a kayaking expedition in Scotland with his daughter. Photograph: George Monbiot

When I reached the place I had marked, I thought at first that I had come too late. All I could see was the steady progression of the waves and an occasional herring gull, hunting for fry. Then I noticed a broad, smooth scar on the water, a sign of turbulence below. I moved towards it. As I did so, a great, ragged fin rose from the sea. Three metres behind it, a tail scythed across the waves. I realised that the shark was circling towards me.

I knew that basking sharks are harmless filter feeders, but seeing so vast an animal coming my way as I sat in a tiny plastic boat provoked a moment of panic. I thought it was going to hit me, but the tail swept around again and passed just in front of the prow. My terror vanished. I watched the great snout go by, followed by the flaring gills, then yard after yard of the grey barrel body, brindled by the light refracting through the waves, almost scraping the boat.

After the shark passed me, it dived. I turned the kayak, scanning the sea, then saw the flash again, 100 metres away. It was the same fish I recognised the dorsal fin, damaged perhaps by a propeller. As it circled, I cut across the arc. Again, it approached head-on. This time it did not turn. I saw the cavernous white mouth, perhaps a metre and a half across, bearing down on the boat. It passed straight underneath me. I noticed the scars on the skin, and, close to the tail, a remora, a fish mostly confined to the tropics that attaches itself to large animals using a sucker on the top of its head. This one must have travelled thousands of miles with its host.

As I anticipated the sharks movements, placing myself in front of it, it passed close to the boat again and again, once gently brushing against the hull. It slowly spiralled away northwards until it reached the point where the incoming tide pouring through the sound hit the Atlantic swell, creating standing waves some two metres high that felt distinctly unsafe. Unable to follow, I stared wistfully after the shark. The sea around me exploded with greater launce, baitfish that leapt from the water and pattered back like rain as mackerel hit them from below.

The strange creatures follow the Gulf Stream to our coasts in the summer … A sunfish being cleaned by pennant coralfish. Photograph: Dave Fleetham/Getty Images/Perspectives

I had promised to take everyone in our party out in a double kayak to see the sharks, so over the two days when the weather was calm, I was on the water almost continuously. We saw perhaps a dozen, of which one stood out: a monster twice the length of the boat that looked almost as broad as a whale. The largest basking shark ever measured was 12 metres (40 feet) long, but the combination of hunting, bycatch and boat strikes nowadays makes it less likely that they will live long enough to reach that size. The beast we saw was probably about as big as they now get. The same feral ecstasy a primal thrill mingled with an ancient recognition returned every time.

The sharks were not all we saw. Twice, different fins emerged from the water: tall, slim and translucent, flopping from side to side. They belonged to sunfish: the strange creatures with almost circular bodies that follow the Gulf Stream to our coasts in the summer. The first one we approached was about a metre wide. It lay listlessly on its side, watching us with a vast, round eye. When I leant over to touch it, it flipped away with surprising speed and disappeared into the depths.

I would like to live in a world where such experiences are common. This is not an impossible dream. In the late 18th century, Oliver Goldsmith described the arrival of herring, as seen from the British shore. The fish, he recorded, were divided into distinct columns of five or six miles in length and three or four broad; while the water before them curls up, as if forced out of its bed the whole water seems alive, and is seen so black with them to a great distance that the number seems inexhaustible. The herring were followed by massive cod, spurdog, tope and smooth hound, longfin and bluefin tuna, blue, porbeagle, thresher, mako and occasional great white sharks. Moving in behind, within sight of the shore, were pods of fin whales and sperm whales.

This astonishing congregation of life has all but gone, largely through overfishing. But marine ecosystems recover very quickly when they have the chance. The crucial policy is to decide that large areas should no longer be commercially exploited. There is a longstanding call by ocean ecologists for 30% of Britains seas to be protected. How much have we achieved? So far, 0.01%: tiny pockets of sea around Lundy island in the Bristol Channel, Lamlash Bay off the Isle of Arran and Flamborough Head in East Yorkshire. Everywhere else, commercial fishing is permitted to rip up ecosystems and suppress the recovery of our natural wonders.

It is madness, not least because one of the victims of this policy is the fishing industry. When you establish reserves in which fish and shellfish can breed and grow to large sizes, the spillover effect fish migrating into the surrounding waters greatly increases the total catch. Declaring areas of sea off-limits to the fishing industry would also revitalise other coastal industries, as divers, whale and dolphin watchers and sport fishers all of whom tend to bring in more income and jobs than commercial fishing does came to witness the astounding spectacles that would result.

This marine rewilding could make emotional experiences of the kind I now live for available to everyone. We owe it to ourselves, as well as to the other species with which we share the world, to allow the seas that surround us to regain their wild enchantments.

This article is part of the Guardians Wild supplement. To read the rest, pick up the newspaper on Saturday 4 February

Read more: http://bit.ly/2l9be4g

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