#and she never listens!! and then complains ''omg they always give me the same critique 🙄''

[hwiyoungies]

screaming at my laptop while watching gbbo because the judges are fucking Stupid and just send the best baker home

[kenzichi]

Here’s my KH3 review:

I would like to start off by saying I enjoyed this game very much. I have a lot of good to say about this game, but also a lot of bad. I tried to keep it spoiler free, but once I reached the cons it was inevitable. Heads up on that. And I also tried not to dive too deep into critiquing the story itself too much. I did sorta do that at the end though, but I felt it was okay to include the points I mentioned because they’re about Org. 13 and X and this game concludes their story arc.

Pros: The game is visually stunning. The worlds are GIGANTIC. It was a little intimidating actually. I always had the thought that I was going to miss something in the back of my mind. But it was still a joy to explore. The scenery really felt alive. The grass moved with you, the water rippled, you can see Sora’s hair move when it was windy! My favorite world in 3 is Kingdom of Corona. It’s just so beautiful and so fun! In this world especially, you interact with Rapunzel as she explores her environment because she’s never experienced it before. It’s really cute and really gets you involved in the world besides just being the guy that takes out heartless.

 Another pro is: Yoko Shimomura did it again! Her music compositions for 3 are AMAZING! I got into the music right away and eventually found myself humming to every background song in no time flat. I also enjoyed how every world had more than 2 themes this time. Usually we had a ‘calm’ world theme and a ‘battle’ world theme. Yoko went beyond that and gave us a different theme per situation… for EACH world! One example is in Frozen: we had a theme for the mountain, a battle theme, and a theme for after they met Larxene (and she did the thing if you’ve played the game lol). My favorite theme is the one for Hiro’s Garage in Sanfransokyo. It’s so soothing; I could listen to it for hours. The theme for Aqua’s battle is totally creepy and it fits so well. I enjoyed all of the music.

 Game play is fun and really nostalgic. They brought back equipping abilities (with AP), the old command box from 2, and accessories. Magic is better than ever in this game. One problem I had with 2 is that I could only use a few spells and my MP level would quickly run out so I felt it was a waste of time. In 3, even just starting, I didn’t have to worry about running out as fast. It was a relief not having to worry about watching my MP levels and I used magic a lot more in this game.

 A new combat feature for 3 is the keyblade transformations. When you finish a world and gain a keyblade, you can unlock special abilities with that keyblade. For example: if you equip the Toybox keyblade, and you bash enough heartless with it, you can transform your keyblade into a giant hammer. I wasn’t too excited about it when they first revealed these new abilities during development, but they’re actually super fun and totally optional if you really don’t dig it. You can also switch between 3 different keyblades during combat easily if you feel one keyblade isn’t working out against an enemy. I love this new feature. My favorite keyblade transformations are the Toybox hammer and the Monstropolis Yo-yos. Sora is channeling his inner Killua with the Yo-yos and I am all for that lol.  

 Another pro is Sora, Donald, and Goofy’s interactions. Like, omg, they are so cute. They are so genuine. It really felt like I was watching Sora and his two Disney dads. It gave me life and I felt so many emotions watching them. This trio was the best developed trio in 3.

 Cons: Pacing y’all. My biggest problem with this game as a whole. It started off good, but once you finish the Disney worlds and get into the real plot with Xehanort it’s like a rollercoaster and not in a good way. All the things we were hoping to happen, that we’ve been waiting for for years, happen so quickly and then it’s over like… did it even happen? I felt I didn’t get to be as emotional about those scenes as I could have been because they immediately thrust us into another scene. I didn’t have time to appreciate those moments like I wanted to.  

 Kairi…. Poor Kairi. Nomura screwed her over again. He let us get hyped about her finally training to become a keyblade wielder, gave her a new outfit, and showed her willing and ready to fight in the Keyblade Graveyard and yet? Screwed all of us. I wasn’t expecting her to be a badass, but I was expecting her to be SOMETHING. I was really hoping she’d develop a personality and presence in this game, but she fell flat yet again because Nomura doesn’t know what to do with her. She literally only exists as a plot device and love interest for Sora (I’m not going to get into that here lol).

 Also disappointed they hyped playable Riku, but it was only 2 times, for 2 battles and frankly switching between Sora’s magic command menu to Riku’s with no time to look through it and get accustomed to it other than during actual combat was a pain. Also sad Sora, Riku, or Kairi didn’t travel to ONE world together. Not one. I was hoping to have them in my party as least once, but nope. I’m generally disappointed in the lack of Destiny Island trio interactions. There were no moments between the 3 of them and there was no interaction between Riku and Kairi and barely any between Sora and Riku despite growing so close in DDD. It goes to show Nomura didn’t develop this ‘trio’ as well as the others.  

Another problem I had were almost all the Organization members ended up… being ‘good after all’ or something. For over 10 years they gave no indication Luxord, Larxene, and Marluxia were nothing, but just evil just because and they had no feelings towards Sora other than a boy that was in their way, but once they start fading away for good it’s suddenly, ‘you’re a great person, Sora. Let’s meet again’ or in the case of Larxene, just giving Sora the time of day and actually talking to him civilly just felt so random to me. Including Xemnas. He suddenly revealed how he felt sorta bad for betraying the old organization members, but there was literally no hint of that before?? Idk, it just felt out of place. I was kinda cringing the whole time, haha. I’m actually surprised YX was the one that disappeared the most unremorseful for his (future) actions.

 And then there was Xehanort, omg. He literally destroyed the lives of dozens of people, almost sent the world into the apocalypse, and had this grand scheme for the last 15+ years that he literally invested multiple lives to see fulfilled, but once his old bff Eraqus tells him ‘you’re done’, he went, ‘okay’. Lol wat? That’s it? I’m sure he knew he lost, but I expected more of a grumbling, complaining old man on the brink of death than just a nonchalant, ‘you done good kids’ while giving the x-blade to Sora with a damn smile on his face. I cringed. It all felt unfulfilling to me at that moment because X gave up too easily and was so OOC. I think Nomura just wanted to wrap up this story real quick and move on with his life.

 And another thing! 3 didn’t go into Xehanort’s past. They gave us some cutscenes of X and Eraqus playing chess and flirting, but that’s it. When did their relationship change? What made Xehanort so obsessed with dark and light balancing? When did he meet Braig? What happened to Scala ad Caelum? Does it still exist? Like…. They didn’t go into X’s background AT ALL. I was really hoping to see more about his character.

 Neutral feelings: I remember reading somewhere that 3 was supposed to be the longest game in the series, but I finished the game in about the same time as the others. So maybe they meant longest game gameplay wise and not story wise. On the plus side, there is a TON of stuff to do in this game like a bunch of mini games, cooking with Remy, finding lucky emblems, and exploring worlds after they’re completed. On the downside though, even just 10 more minutes of cutscenes could have helped the pacing in the later part of the game. The gameplay and story are imbalanced and they should have focused on solidifying the story rather than adding so many different gameplay elements. I honestly find them all overwhelming. I stopped trying to remember them all.

 The Disney attraction rides. I don’t really have a like or dislike for these reaction commands. Good thing is that some are fun to see visually like the train and the tea cups (Sora is so dang cute in those teacups). Downside is some attractions don’t seem to fit with the heartless that activate them. For example: that shooting attraction ride is terrible with flying type heartless and yet I get that command a lot with them so it’s pointless. I never hit them.

 This is a con for me, but maybe not for others. They closed a big chapter in the game, but kept a lot of plot points open too. I think my main problem with 3 was that I was hoping it would be more conclusive. Nomura made it seem like it was more conclusive. I already knew 3 wasn’t the end of the series as a whole, but you can still end a storyline with a definite conclusion while still being open to new adventures. 3 didn’t do that. They closed a bunch of chapters, but also left us with a lot of new questions.

 Most of the voice acting is great in this game! Haley really delivered as Sora and I honestly think this was his best performance as him to date! It was genuine, totally cute, and fit Sora perfectly. You can tell he had a great time voicing this game. I also really enjoyed Larxene which is something for me because I felt her VA was trying too hard in CoM. She really improved in 3 and it was fun to watch her. On the other hand, the voices for Xehanort and Marluxia fell flat. Xehanort’s is just unfortunate and I don’t think anyone could have captured him as well as Nimoy did no matter how much they tried. Marluxia sounded like he belonged in an infomercial. Totally hated his voice.  

[mermaidsirennikita]

June 2017 Book Roundup

This month, I read thirteen books, some of which were total disappointments, one of which really surprised me, and one of which was easily among the best followups I’ve read in a while.  That was my favorite book of the month, Kiersten White’s Now I Rise, the second in her Conqueror’s Saga.  As that is a sequel and definitely requires reading of the first book, And I Darken, I also want to recommend The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid.  A sweeping historical fiction novel, it tells the tale of a glamorous Hollywood icon with plenty of secrets, and showcases a unique romance that surprised me--but also made me very happy.  Hopefully, I’ll find something just as good next month!

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas.  4/5.  When Starr and her childhood friend Khalil are pulled over by a cop, the worst happens: the unarmed--innocent--Khalil is killed.  Starr is the only witness, and she’s torn in several different directions.  Her parents are worried about her safety, and her father’s gangster past makes things a bit more complicated; protesters want Starr to come forward and defend Khalil, who is being labeled a drug dealer and a “thug” by the media; and Starr herself goes to a predominantly white private school, and isn’t sure what her friends would think.  Obviously, “The Hate U Give” deals with a lot of content that I as a white girl really can’t properly comment on, and that’s one of the reasons why I gave it four out of five stars--I can’t speak to its accuracy.  But from what I’ve heard from friends who can, it’s viewed very positively, and it seems to reflect much of what we see in cases involved unarmed black men being shot by cops--with a personal spin.  Starr is a deeply relatable, human character.  I felt empathy for her, while at the same time not feeling like she was too perfect.  The story is written so lovingly, and Starr’s entire family felt like people I would actually meet.  The conflict of the book isn’t just surrounding the main plot, but Starr’s parents’ differing views on what their children need, and Starr’s father’s past. Starr’s dad, Mav, was a GREAT character. He’s exactly the kind of person that people uneducated about these issues need to see: an innately good person with a rough past, trying to do right by his family while at the same time dealing with some understandable demons.  The only thing I can complain about is Starr’s boyfriend, who struck me as the most annoying type of white boy.  And she deserved better, no questions asked.

A Knight in Shining Armor by Jude Deveraux.  4/5.  This romance novels sees schoolteacher Dougless crying in an English church right after being dumped and abandoned by her boyfriend.  Her tears seem to bring Lord Nicholas Stafford from the sixteenth century--though he’s not quite the knight in shining armor she expected.  Nicholas is remembered not for his accomplishments, but his many affairs and his eventual execution; and he wants to go back to his time, but not before figuring out how to prevent all of that.  Dougless agrees to help him, but like... you can guess about what ensues.  This book is considered a classic in the romance genre.  It was written in the late 80s, and that does show; while Dougless isn’t anti-feminist, she’s definitely a product of an adjustment to feminism.  She wants her boyfriend to take care of her WITHIN REASON, and he’s such a tool that you can understand why.  The thing is that the book has a fluffy, wish fulfillment quality that is impossible to resist.  Deveraux makes Nicholas sexy, but isn’t above making fun of him, and critiquing him for that matter.  Dougless experiences noticeable character development, and while the book is imperfect, it’s highly enjoyable.

When Dimple Met Rishi by Sandhya Menon.  4/5.  Teenage coder Dimple isn’t planning on following her mother’s plans and settling down anytime soon.  So she’s thrilled when her parents pay for her to go to Insomnia Con, a coding contest with a prize that involves her idol.  Little does she know that Rishi is also going to Insomnia Con--and though she has no idea who he is, their parents have been planning on the two of them getting married for years.  Traditional, dreamy, artistic Rishi knows that he’s supposed to get to know Dimple and someday marry her; and he thinks she knows that too.  (She does not.)  So when the two meet, there isn’t exactly the instant connection he expected.  But after they become partners for the contest, they get to know each other--and understand each other.  This YA romance was adorable, and probably one of the best I’ve read in a long time.  Sandhya Menon is writing about what she knows, and it shows.  Rishi and Dimple are able to bond over their shared cultural backgrounds, but that doesn’t mean they’re the same person--the expectations Rishi’s parents have for him are different because he’s a boy, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t there.  He reacts to his parents by embracing his culture and putting aside his dreams, while Dimple becomes aggressively rebellious.  Their chemistry is perfect, and I became invested in their relationship very quickly.  This is a great approach to the “arranged marriage” genre, and is a bit more lighthearted than other recent versions I’ve seen.

The Breakdown by B.A. Paris.  2/5.  While driving late one night, Rachel sees a young woman pulled over on the side of the road.  Soon after, she hears about a murder--and realizes that not only did she see the woman just before she was killed, but that she knew her.  Then Rachel begins forgetting small things on a daily basis, apparently having a breakdown; but the specter of her mother’s demise from early-onset dementia hangs over her as she grows increasingly paranoid and sure that the killer is after her.  This book was profoundly disappointing.  It had the makings of a good domestic thriller, but I called almost every single thing that happened, and the pathos of it all weren’t that deep.  Even when it seemed as if it was going to get interesting for a minute, it didn’t.

Once and for All by Sarah Dessen.  3/5.  Louna (omg Sarah Dessen protagonist names) is the daughter of a famous wedding planner, jaded about love both due to her cynical mother’s outlook and the tragic ending of her first real relationship.  Then she meets Ambrose, the outgoing son of one of her mother’s clients.  In order to keep him out of his bride-to-be sister’s hair, Louna’s mother gives him a job for the summer, and as Louna and Ambrose bond, they begin to challenge each other in unexpected ways.  Honestly, this was a feel-good book and it was cute in the way that Sarah Dessen books always are, and cheesy in the way they always are (lol her protagonist names I mean...).  But while I remember “Saint Anything” being good, I honestly disliked “The Moon and More” and I feel as if nothing of hers has really hit me since books like “Just Listen”, “The Truth About Forever”, and of course “This Lullaby”, which is one of my all-time favorites.  Ambrose was really cute, but his conflicts with Louna seemed super contrived--and for that matter, at times he seemed like a Dexter (”This Lullaby”) rip-off.  Louna had a sad backstory, but it never connected with me partially because she never connected.  Again, it’s cute but I wasn’t super invested, and the investment in the main relationship--or at least the main characters--are key to really loving a Dessen book.  I also feel like Dessen usually benefits from building a romantic relationship between the characters ahead of the last 25% of the book (see: “This Lullaby” and “Just Listen”).  Otherwise, she needs to amp up the sexual tension in a palpable way to get people invested faster (see: “The Truth About Forever”).  The tension between Ambrose and Louna just wasn’t there.  Hope this author gets her mojo back soon.

The Forger’s Spell by Edward Dolnick.  4/5.  This non-fiction book takes on the story of Han Van Meegeren--a failed artist who managed to dupe the world with his forged “Vemeer” paintings.  Most notably, Hermann Goering, Hitler’s right-hand man, was a buyer of one the fakes.  Really, Van Meegeren’s story is the backdrop for a deeper investigation about how forgeries happen in the art world.  Dolnick does a good job, though I didn’t agree with all of his assertions--he describes the famed art critic’s “eye” as something that does exist, albeit after a lot of training.  Really, the “eye” seems to be dismissed by many today, whether or not you’ve been trained.  He also seems to go along with a lot of ideas that are those of a connoisseur, and applies them to art critics and art historians in general.  While some art historians specialize in connoisseurship, not all connoisseurs are art historians; in fact, connoisseurship seems to be falling out of style, and my school didn’t bother much with it.  I also feel that he could have done a better job of differentiating between the historian and the critic.  Overall, the book is a good examination of the psychological aspects that go into forgery, but this is very much a book about history.  Today, Van Meegeren probably couldn’t have pulled this off--not simply because the art market has more resources now in terms of scientific testing, but because it seems to me that art historians are now being trained in a very different way in a post-Panofsky, post-Schapiro world.  We’re told to be highly skeptical at all times, and while it’s possible that the old guard would have still fallen for a fake Vermeer, I think that many younger art historians would have been more inherently skeptical.  Anyway, I clearly geeked out over this book and found it highly interesting.

The Warrior Queen by Lavinia Collins.  2/5.  An Arthurian retelling and the first of a trilogy, this book focuses on Guinevere’s early marriage to King Arthur following his defeat of her father’s forces.  Pretty sure this was self-published or published by a small indie publisher, and it showed.  This book is quite short (it’s bound in an omnibus as part I with the rest of the trilogy, but it seems that it’s listed on Goodreads as an individual novel too) and while it’s not terribly written, there is some repetition that an editor would have (or should have) caught.  It’s not a bad book and I think that if you’re looking for more of a simple romance, it’s okay.  But as it is, it runs extremely quickly and the character development suffers.  For that matter, while the Lancelot romance is very present, Kay takes Lancelot’s role in places where he shouldn’t, and Morgan le Fay seems to be a typical schemer.  Not for me.

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid.  5/5.  Aging Hollywood legend Evelyn Hugo calls upon Monique Grant, a no-name journalist, to write her biography out of nowhere.  Monique understandably wants to focus on Evelyn’s seven marriages--which one was the love of her life, anyway?  Evelyn reveals herself to be much tougher--and much more scheming--than she initially might have seemed.  And there are plenty of secrets to be revealed, including her connection to Monique.  I really, really liked this book.  It had elements of grand romance and tragedy, while at the same time retaining the feel of a tell-all.  The reveal of Evelyn’s greatest love was well-done, and I believed in the ups and downs of the relationship.  You can definitely choose the starlets from whose lives Reid drew.  It’s well worth the read, and I plan on trying Reid’s other books soon.  

Marriage of a Thousand Lies by S.J. Sindu.  2/5.  Lucky (short for Lakshmi) is a part of a traditional Tamil family, and as such has married Krishna to please her mother.  The thing is that both Lucky and Krishni are gay, and simply protecting each other’s (and their families’) reputations through their sham marriage.  Then Lucky learns that Nisha, her childhood friend and first love, is getting married.  As Nisha and Lucky reenter each other’s lives, they find themselves unable to resist each other, while Lucky’s life implodes around her. This is a short read and the prose is very pretty, but I found Lucky to be pretty dull.  Krishna was the character I wanted to know more about, to be honest; or even Nisha.  It felt pretty paint by numbers, but perhaps that’s because I’m not from the same cultural background as Lucky.  Not a bad book, but I just didn’t connect to it.

Song of the Current by Sarah Tolcser.  1/5.  Caro is descended from generations of river sailors, all of whom worship the river god.  After her father refuses to transport a crate--who knows what’s in it?--Caro agrees to do the task in order to gain his freedom.  Aaaand so on.  I think I hated this book so much in part because it could have been a lot more.  But it was so slow.  And there was cliche after cliche.  And there were frog people; listen, I know that some of y’all are probably down for actual green frog people who catch flies with their tongues, but I don’t play D&D and I’m not there yet in terms of geekdom.  Also, the romance was insufferable, and tongues actually tangled. This book was published by Bloomsbury, I assume there an editor involved, and THEIR TONGUES STILL TANGLED.  That was when I knew this was a one star book. 

Four Queens: The Provencal Sisters Who Ruled Europe by Nancy Goldstone.  3/5.  This non-fiction book tells the story of four sisters of Provence--Marguerite, Eleanor, Sanchia, and Beatrice.  Marguerite was married off to Louis IX of France, which in turn led to Eleanor becoming Henry III of England’s bride--Sanchia and Beatrice’s queenships would come later down the road.  So to call them the sisters who ruled Europe is a bit misleading, but it makes for a great title; and it truly is remarkable that a fairly unassuming noble family would produce four girls who would all become queens.  As you might imagine, the fact that this all took place during the thirteenth century means that Goldstone has to make some leaps in logic based on her research, especially in regards to the comparatively minor Sanchia and Beatrice.  I know little about the subject so I can’t speak to Goldstone’s accuracy, but all in all it was a nice pop history read.

The Alice Network by Kate Quinn.  2/5.  Shortly after the end of World War II, American Charlie St. Clair travels to Europe with her mother to take care of a “little problem”--her out of wedlock pregnancy.  At the same time, however, she wants to figure out what happened to her beloved cousin Rose, who went missing during the war.  During her search, she meets Eve--a woman who served as a spy during World War I.  The story takes on their alternating perspectives, as Charlie struggles to find Rose and Eve grapples with her past.  This kind of crushed me, as I am such a big fan of Kate Quinn’s Mistress of Rome series.  I never really bothered with her Giulia Farnese books, because I knew that through no fault of Quinn’s they wouldn’t work for me; but this disappointed me.  I’m not the hugest fan of World War I and II as historical eras, and I certainly love Ancient Rome a lot more.  But this could have  been so compelling.  It takes so long to start, however, and Eve’s perspective was less interesting than Charlie’s, to the point that I kept wishing that I could skip Eve’s chapters entirely. By the time the action and romance really began, I was so zoned out that it didn’t matter anymore.

Now I Rise by Kiersten White.  5/5.  The followup to the already-great start that was “And I Darken”, “Now I Rise” continues the dual stories of Lada (the fictionalized female equivalent of Vlad Tepes/Vlad the Impaler) and her brother Radu.  While Lada is struggling to reclaim her throne in Wallachia, Radu remains a servant of the Ottoman Empire and its sultan, Mehmed--the man he secretly loves.  Of course, Mehmed is obsessed with Lada--almost as much as he’s obsessed with Constantinople--and Lada is sort of obsessed with him back, but not as much as she’s obsessed with her birthright.  This book sees the incredibly twisted trio get even darker.  I really appreciate that Lada, Radu, and Mehmed aren’t super great people; Radu is less blood/power-thirsty than his sister and friend, but he is very manipulative and at times places his desire for Mehmed above loyalty to his sister.  (Which is fucked up, as Mehmed would probably sell Radu to Satan for one corn chip if that corn chip was Lada, who in turn never knows how to feel about Mehmed because boy is hot but boy is also about as twisted as she is.)  I love this series so much because of the moral grayness and dualities of all of these characters.  Even when they did things that I really didn’t agree with, I still understood why they did them.  For that matter, the supporting characters (especially Nazira, Radu’s equally gay wife) really upped the game of this book.  This series is an absolute must-read.