#and that went so well I'm sitting back kinda analyzing it going 'well THAT wasn't intentional but it's pretty cool'

[afniel]

I have no self control. Like, at all. I told myself to give me at least a week off and I would not hear shit about it.

To be fair the entire contents are currently "Words go here" but still. That's three. Solid start.

Can you blame me though, the Vegas-Indy flight is so boring and I can get so much done during it.

[aleksanderscult]

I loved your analysis! Can you analyse the (barely there, not enough) Darklina scenes from the KOS duology? I could not rationalize some of what was going on there.

First of all, I'm so sorry for taking that long to reply, anon! (Hasn't it been over two weeks since you send this or what??😭😭)

Second, thank you so much for your kind words! 💗💗

Third, you and I both friend 🤝🤝

'Cause honestly I didn't know what the fuck was happening in that interaction too 😭

I'll actually analyze the only Darklina scene we got in RoW. But if you want another one too, just send me an ask!

So! Let's dive in and analyze that hot mess, shall we?

(note: I had to go back and read this scene very carefully in order to understand what the actual fuck they were saying💀)

⚠️TW!: PTSD, trauma⚠️

The way he's so obedient with her even in this life 😭

If somebody else had ordered him to do that, he wouldn't obey. But Alina? Alina is a different story and this is the first time he hears her voice since his death in R&R.

'Any little victory'

Uhh....okay...??

You made him wipe his feet. I'm.... impressed??

(confusion levels 📉)

LMAO MY BOY WOKE UP AND CHOSE VIOLENCE

I always believed that the dynamic between Aleksander and Alina involves lots of teasing. But not in the fun sense. But in the sense of "I'm getting under your skin. My words to you sting".

And that's what the Darkling does here too. He's a prisoner. Their prisoner. So he tries to gain the upper hand by using his wits, his past with Alina and the latter's trauma against her to get even.

Pretty clever, huh?

See what I mean?

He tries to weaken her confidence and it's interesting that back in Keramzin he also tried to get even (and he did) by killing her mother figure.

Aleksander: "Wanna fuck with me? Wanna mess with me? How about that time when I burnt that orphanage and killed your "mother"?"

*Alina's sure confidence is gone and now the Darkling has the upper hand in her feelings*

OUTSTANDING MOVE 👌

Excuse me, Misha? Who the Hell gave you the permission to interrupt or talk at all??

Also, do you really expect from the Darkling to remember a little boy while he was too busy trying to rule a nation, win a war and persuade Alina to join him?

And if you also expect him to remember you from that time when Baghra went out to confront her son while you escorted her, then you're also wrong. 'Cause he was too busy being furious that his mother sided and helped the opposite side and too busy being distraught because he was watching her fall to her death.

You're not important, son.

Sit down.

LMAO THIS IS SO HILARIOUS

Misha you're still an infant. Please shut up.

I honestly liked him in the Grisha Trilogy (I found him a cutie) but now I want to slap him and everyone else in this duology except Aleksander

The Darkling has survived numerous murdering attempts against him. He was finally killed by Alina not because of some grand display of her powers but because the former was so heartbroken by Alina's fate (and his own because he would be alone) that he just gave up on his life. Basically he committed suicide.

Misha, you wouldn't be able to kill him even now that he's powerless and in chains. Probably you would stumble and fall in the effort or smth.

Uhh actually no, Mal.

Threating him only makes you sound like idiots, honestly.

Also, since when did Mal gained ✨wisdom✨?

Wasn't he the hot-tempered one in the trilogy who always got angry with the mere mention of the Darkling? And the one who wanted to kill him as well?

Alina, you know damn well what his name is.

Honestly, I think she didn't say it because she wanted to respect the fact that he trusted her to keep it.

And I agree that Yuri is a horrible name for him. Makes him seem like a fisherman 😭

Meanwhile Alina in S&B:

So either Bardugo kinda forgot these scenes or we're led to believe that these scenes weren't her being happy, but we thought she was happy.

(me casually ignoring that theory because I choose to believe only the things that MAKE SENSE)

The fact that Bardugo made Alina believe that she was unhappy when she was whole with her powers and surrounded by people like her but totally happy now that she has no powers (a part of her soul actually) and living with a man that slut-shamed her in a toxic, childhood place is umm... yeah. Not good.

So basically:

Aleksander: "You look different. You look like shit. What the fuck did they do to you? This is not you"

Alina: "No bro I'm happy now that I live in toxic conditions where the teachers mock me, Mal takes me out for a walk to forget my psychological traumas and I raise some Grisha children that will fade because they don't use their powers and some others that I probably am in no condition to raise. At least that's what the author said is happiness, bro."

Aleksander: "......."

Alina: "......"

The readers: "........."

ALEKSANDER IS HONESTLY ALL OF US FRR WITH HIS LINES

"In peace"

Yeah, having PTSD certainly is peaceful. And knowing that you abandoned your country and left its fate to chance certainly makes you sleep like a baby at night.

"We chose the life we wanted"

Alina, you didn't CHOOSE to lose your powers. And before that you didn't even know what you wanted to do with your life. It was a last minute decision for you.

"I fell pray to the same greed that drove you"

Girl, are we the only ones who did our homework??

In his POV in RoW he confirmed that he tampered with merzost in the past because he wanted to stop Ravka's wars. So as far as we know he never used power exclusively for himself.

"I paid the price for tampering with merzost"

Now hold a second. I thought that the reason Alina lost her powers is because Morozova wanted that said power to be shared by any otkazat'sya around. It wasn't that much of a punishment as much as a need for Morozova to share that power.

Unless it was..... both?

I just want a guy that will believe in me and my abilities the way Aleksander does with Alina, man 😭

He strongly believes that she could become a Queen even without her powers. And he's actually so right when he says to her that her wounds won't heal. Because no matter how much you try to convince yourself that you are alright. No matter how hard you try to persuade your mind that you're not broken, reality will always hit you. Some wounds never heal and Alina's certainly will not. She didn't lose a toy, she lost a part of her soul and witnessed many die. How the hell does she think she's suitable to raise children, when she herself is NOT okay psychologically?

"In the wake of your wars"

Excuse me. Why is the Fjerdan and Shu wars always the Darkling's fault??

"And maybe when our country is free, then that wound will close"

She sounds so brainwashed bye--

And just like I said, wounds like that never close unfortunately. It can only become more bearable with time. But not forgetable.

Ah yes. Bardugo makes us watch how cute their relationship is.

Am I supposed to take off my camera and snap pictures of them whispering with tears in my eyes: "They look so adorable"?

'Cause I won't.

The way Bardugo has made Mal unfazed by the Darkling's comments. A thing that completely contrasts his nature in the Grisha trilogy.

He also made him have "sassy" lines because we've got to like him somehow, right? 🤗

Still hate him

Basically, dear anon, the author has made Mal more "likeable", immune to the Darkling's insults, patient and witty in order for us to change our mind about him and finally like him.

(mission failed btw)

He is literally nothing like his trilogy counterpart and, if possible, she made him more annoying.

(how the hell she managed to do that, I don't know)

I just feel sorry for Aleksander who has to deal with all these jerks. If I were there, I would have helped him kill them and bury their bodies.

Because you let your heart and feelings get the better of you, Aleksander. Because you proved to be the most human of all these characters here. You let her come close. And that's what killed you.

(also, shut up Misha)

Alina, you could have said "no" to that invitation. So stop acting like they dragged you from the hair here.

"Do you think you could manage it?"

Do you, Alina? 'Cause really, what did YOU do to make the lives of Grisha better? At least he built a palace for them.

"It's not like you didn't get a fair try before. Hundreds of tries"

Yeah, and half of them failed because you got in the way. You refused to listen to him and, even if you didn't like the way he dealt with the persecution, you chose to run away (again) instead of deciding to stay and do better.

SHE DID NOT JUST SAY THAT ZOYA AND NIKOLAI COULD DO BETTER LMAO 😭😭

Zoya, the very fact that he mentioned you should feel like a badge of honor.

And yet Ravka is in its worst condition ever.

Sorry Alina but I don't see shit from them.

The fact that the Darkling keeps mentioning that he's eternal is to remind them that he has seen everything and done everything. He has more experience than they will ever have. Not to gloat about it. And yet Alina takes it as the latter.

And it's funny that Alina turns him down for the job saying he has no powers when Alina herself suffers from the same condition 😀

Finally someone with self-reflection.

THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!!

PREACH!! PREACH!! 👏👏

When you have the "villain" exposing the true problem in the story, the flaws and failures while having the heroes screaming "EVERYTHING IS FINE. YOU'RE WRONG!" then you know that something is wrong.

How the Hell are they gonna provide eternal peace in Ravka and to the Grisha when:

They have no experience

They are too busy criticizing the villain instead of looking at their own flaws

They doubt themselves

(you can add to the list, guys)

And he's not shaken because he's talking with a Saint, Zoya. He's shaken because he's talking to Alina. She always had a way in getting under his skin. He said it.

"Fine. Make me your villain" fits here 'cause he never perceived himself as the bad guy but he knew that this is what others thought of him.

I think it still stung to him to know that others saw his every action in a negative light but he still kept going. And sometimes he even used it (at the end of R&R).

Alina still wants to believe that there's something redeemable inside him. Her POVs were always the "kindest" in the way they painted the Darkling.

MISHA COULD YOU PLEASE SHUT IT

What about his mother, huh??

Who, despite the abuse he suffered from her, he still cared about??

Alina?? Oh boy, he was in love with her, obsessed and gave her so many chances. Something that he almost never does unless he's desperate.

So PRETTY PLEASE STOP TALKING

Meanwhile the Darkling in R&R, chapter 11:

"I have regretted many of the things I’ve had to do in this war."

So either Bardugo forgot that or Alina did or Aleksander changed his mind.

Or (my theory) Bardugo changed his perception in order for us to feel less sympathetic towards him.

Nevertheless, at least he has a spine and knows where he stands.

And Alina wanted the Darkling to say it not for him but for her. So she can feel okay. Unless Zoya is talking bullshit.

YES ALEKSANDER WHY DIDN'T YOU LIE SO OUR HEROINES COULD FEEL BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES???!!

HOW DARE YOU?? 😠😠

He tries so hard to persuade her that the reality she lives in will not pay off anything. First off, this is not who she is or what she was meant to become and second, why does she teaches children stories that are lies? Feeding them false hope, repeating a circle that others had also been doing.

"Do you *really* believe..."

He wants to make sure that she stands by that. He just can't believe that this is her opinion. Her choice.

He just wants her to shine people!! 😭😍

"Those stories tell us the only people who matter are Kings and Queens. They're wrong"

Now tell me, Alina, which stories do YOU tell them? What do you teach them? That the world is as rosy as the orphanage they live in, where they only eat sugar and play the piano? Do you imagine what kind of reality check will those children get once they live in the real world?

And here, ladies and gentlemen, we see the Darkling having reached his limits and saying "Fuck this shit I'm out"

Congratulations, Aleksander! You survived that meeting with these buffoons and their groundless arguments!! 👏👏

Here, have this! 🏅

He saw his chance (Alina holding Mal's hand) and seized it. But I think he really meant all those questions he asked to Alina.

So, dear anon, what we have here is the villain making his effort (again) to be heard and understood. He tries to make them see his own point of view: Ravka is in serious danger and Zoya and Nikolai are in no position to protect it. He, on the other hand, can since he has more experience and balls to deal with these issues. The Darkling is no pussy. He truly makes hard decisions when he must, something that essentially all rulers must do when the situation calls for it.

But! We have the good guys silencing him and threating him (even having a little child to do the last one) in order for the reader to understand what he has left in his wake. How much pain he has caused.

Mal has gotten ✨magically✨ wiser and calmer and has actual wits to repel the Darkling's insults in order for us to get to like Mal and see how much he has changed.

Alina sounds like a brainwashed woman who is convinced that her lifestyle is great! That wanting something more (idk. a throne and changing the world maybe) is sinful and unfitting of her.

Aleksander is the only one who thinks otherwise for her, though. Thank God, I mean!

He sought Alina out both to reclaim his powers and because he just wanted to see her.

Personally, in this scene only the Darkling makes sense. The others either want to feel good about themselves by threating him or want to convince him that "Hey, we're the good ones here. We know what we're doing, okay?" and his own ways are shit.

Dear anon, if you have any other questions or want me to analyze any other Darklina scene from this book or duology that I didn't include, then just say so!

And please any others who want to add something about this scene, feel free to criticise in the comments! 💛💛

[yyxandere]

BITTERSWEET SCENARIO!

Let’s say that after the events of Yakuza 3 you were traumatized by the sight of your spouse in intensive care after he was literally filled with lead from a turret by his enemies, and as you guessed, it’s your one from favourite characters – Osamu. Since this period, you have developed one habit - you always check his heartbeat by placing your ear against his chest. Most often you do this, let’s say tradition, after nightmares and the rhythm of his heart always calms you down, assuring you that your loved one is still nearby, which makes you involuntarily mutter quietly under your breath so as not to wake him up: "Oh, thanks god that's you’re still alive... The sound of your the beating heart is the sweetest sound of my life".

-ˋˏSINCERELY YOURS. . . ->

MY BELOVED HUSBAND AAAA I'M GLAD THAT PEOPLE KNOW THAT HE'S MY FAVEE

I erm kinda made a small fic, SORRY I GOT CARRIED AWAY! (there's brief mention of Kashiwagi and [Readers] child, hope you don't mind that😭😭)

-

The beeping monitor could never calm you, nor did it help to lessen the anxiety of the day. In fact, the steady beat made the anxiety even worse than if it were a regular alarm because every time it made you feel like everything in your life was slowly unraveling apart and then being swallowed whole into the abyss of sadness.

Your husband Osamu is in the hospital bed as your tear-stained face kisses his pale knuckles, holding on to them tightly without letting go ever since you came to the hospital. He is still sleeping, and he looks absolutely peaceful, just like how he looks after every surgery or treatment he undergoes. You are sitting at his bedside, trying to avoid looking at his face because it is all you can see when you close your eyes. But sometimes it gets harder and you end up staring at him like there is nothing in the world more important than staring at him.

Your heart aches whenever you visit, and to add that, you weren't even sleeping well because of the recurring nightmares, the only time you are at ease is when you are near him, to be exact, your ears near his heart, listening for the comforting thump as his pulse slowly eases your soul and calms you down.

The hospital door opened and you immediately went back to your seat, not wanting anyone to see such a vulnerable action you were doing, you then wiped your tears to see who it was, and it was none other than your nineteen-year-old daughter, Mizuki. She didn't even need to analyze what you were doing, she simply walked up next to you and hugged her dear mother, and you immediately reciprocated the gesture and pulled her tight, burying her head in your neck as you tried to catch your breath, overwhelmed with emotions as she squeezed her arms around her mother.

"Don't worry mama. Papa is much stronger than you think. . . "

-

It had been over two years since the tragedy happened and now, almost three years later, your husband has been doing fine, heck excellent even, but what happened the reassuring memories always mess with your sleep and Osamu wasn't blind to your worries, he would give you calming tea, he would even make comforting meals or make bouquets to help your nerves relax, but the most important thing was that you could get a good night's sleep because it wasn't healthy for you to stay awake during sleepless nights. Osamu knew that you had nightmares about the terrible events, and he felt sorry that you had to lose sleep because of him, but inside of him swells whenever you hug him for comfort, the memories could come back in the middle of the day and you can't help it but hug him in front of many people, it's rather flustering but he can't push you away. (onlookers nearby think it's cute to see an old couple hugging, little did they know that this was the same dude that isolated you from your loved one so you could depend on him)

Yet nothing squeezed his heart more than that one fateful night.

-

A loud gasp and a sudden movement woke up Kashiwagi and to no surprise, it was your nightly terror, even with the lights out the only kind of brightness was brought by the blue moon, illuminating the room slightly so that he could see you laying at his side, his arms around you while you were clutching his hand. Your face was twisted in agony, eyes clenched shut while you were gasping for air through the tears flowing freely like streams down your cheek. A single drop fell onto the sheets beside him as his wife began to sob, shaking violently and trembling in fear.

That tear managed to make Kashiwagi wake up, not wanting you to experience any more of the nightmare you were having. He gently put his hand on your shoulder, "Shh, it’s alright, (Y/n) … it’s just a bad dream", he said in a low voice. Yet even with his comforting words, your eyes couldn't help themselves from having tears waiting to flood out their sockets and pour down on his skin. That simple gesture made Osamu feel as if someone just kicked his stomach hard. As he tightened his grip around your shoulders, making sure not to hurt you, you suddenly stopped crying and turned to look at your husband with teary eyes and a pained expression as you whispered.

"Oh, thank god that you’re still alive… The sound of your beating heart is the sweetest sound of my life".

How can Kashiwagi say no when you look like that? It was impossible, but that didn't stop him from sighing in defeat. He looked at his hands for a few seconds before lifting them up and wiping away some stray hairs behind your ears. After that, he kissed your forehead lovingly before whispering.

"I love you too. The tears in your eyes hurt much more than what happened to me. . ."

[lost-inthedream]

Can you please write remembering your first time having sex with sf9. Idk if that makes sense? Hehe like maybe having a convo with them about it 😀

I hope you like it, anon!!

Remembering your first time with SF9

Sf9 x female reader.

Warning: nudity and mentions of sex

Suggestive content under the cut

Youngbin:

Your boyfriend came from the kitchen holding two big cups of strawberry shakes. You lifted your head toward him and winked validating his neverending efforts to make you happy. "Are you trying to flirt?" he jokes handing you the shake.

"Always..." You narrow your eyes bringing the pink milk closer to your mouth.

He sits closer to you as you taste the drink. Your expression seemed unbordered while he placed your legs on top of his thighs and thumbed your skin in a mindless massage. "You know I wasn't trying to seduce you into doing anything sexual" you resumed "yet, I noticed how yummy you look in that tank top"

He looked down at himself chuckling. "You always liked me in tank tops. I was wearing one when we had sex for the first time"

You almost choked. "I don't remember that detail"

He smirked rising his hands closer to the hem of your pajama pants. "You had never griped my arms that tight before so I knew we were about to take the next step" he nodded at himself. "We waited a bit long but it worthed it."

Inseong:

The back muscles of your big boy did not feel tense anymore. It was not a case of magic, yourself made that with your own hands and that was a pleasure.

"Can you believe I'm feeling more relaxed as well?" you asked with joy melting from your voice.

"You're such an angel" he voiced from under you. His tone was as slack as his body and mind.

The massage was finished but his broad shoulders and back kept attracting your touch. Thus you stayed there sitting on his buttock comfortably and tracing a few moles that decorated his skin.

"All this reminds me of the first time we had sex" you said in a vague way.

Inseong asked you why, torn between motioning you to leave him or staying immobilized by your soft weight. The Downside was that he could not look at you.

"The way you touched me back then made me chill. Everything seemed so right."

"That was because I'm the right guy for you, honey" he jested.

Jaeyoon:

"Sometimes I get jealous of you..." you thought out loud while you analyzed Jaeyoon taking bed selfies to his fans.

He looked at you over the cell phone and slightly tilted his head."Why are you saying that?"

You walked to him so you could sit comfortably too. "You're so pretty and kinda... Mesmerizing. I don't think this is jealousy for real, I just ask myself how you can be real."

He reached for your wrist and dragged you closer until you were practically on top of him. The mobile phone was now left to the side. "You're embarrassing me, honey"

You laughed throwing your head back and consequently you laid it on his chest. "I surely ain't. Remember when I lied here with you for the first time? You didn't seem shy at all even when you grabbed my butt first thing after the lights were off"

He laughed hard this time "I'm very open around you. I didn't have to think twice that day. We had teased each other the whole day before we went to bed. Nothing was fairest than going till the end with those games"

Dawon:

"Baby, please get out" you insisted, now pouting in order to convince him.

He shook his head for the millionth time and added "you're still breathing so I'm staying". He turned his head to the left and laid it on your bare chest as if you were his pillow.

"Crap, Dawon, you're heavy!" You finally gave up on being sweet.

He chuckled. "Okay, doll." Propping his body weight on his elbow, he pecks your lips before sliding his sweaty skin away from you. Then lied on his side to look at you nonetheless. It was still early in the evening, the perfect time for a pillow talk. "You look tired."

"Guess why. That's what you do to me. You fooled me back then in our first time. I thought you were vanilla"

"It was too early to wreck you. To be serious, I can go easier if that's what you need" He smooched your shoulder and stroked your hip tenderly.

You took a deep breath with your lips curled into a smile. "I like all your moods. Don't worry but maybe we could bring back the vibes of our first time now."

"I'd love it."

Zuho:

"I think we're done" he said again after listening to the new song one more time. It was funny like he was the only one working for the last two hours while you did nothing but be nestled on his lap.

"Is it real this time? You finished it for real?" you asked, voice tinted with irony.

It made him embarrassed so he finally closed the windows on his desktop. "I'll come back tomorrow then, baby girl. I belong to you now"

"Tomorrow is Saturday so we're going out" you corrected.

"Okay, boss" he mocked you. "May you stand up for a sec? I'll be taking you in my arms right away." He loved carrying you out of his studio bridal style.

"Not yet. I was thinking, Ju" you explained. "We had our first time here."

He held you tighter, rubbing your back "That was also your very first time here. I was so eager to impress you. Oh my"

"You did great."

"Are you in the mood for a quickie, by the way?"

Rowoon:

"Cheers" Rowoon exclaimed with the happiest expression.

Both you and he held glasses of champagne in order to celebrate the anniversary of your relationship. It was an intimate celebration at your place but he was dressed nicely and so were you.

"What can we make this toast for?" You asked in a playful manner. There was only one possible reason evidently.

"Cheers for 2 years of the best chemistry in bed" Seokwoo spurted in a fake solemn gesture.

As a result, you were not even able to sip on your beverage right away. You could not contain a genuine laugh. "We do have uncomparable chemistry"

"Unmached since day one"

You laid your glass on the table after tasting the alcoholic flavor and looked into his eyes. "You tried to get me drunk at our first time"

"Come on, love! We were having fun. Also, I got tipsy too"

Yoo Taeyang:

He surprised you in the bathroom when you had just dried your body from the shower. The door was open because you wanted to hear it when he arrived. Yet, he was pretty silent that night. You looked at him in the mirror. "Look at my boy, all handsome and prince-like"

He shrinks at your praise as if you had never said such before. "Your prince needs a shower too. Before anything" Then he clicks a kiss in your lips.

"Sure, I'm waiting right here" You said low before sitting back on the toilet bowl.

You two kept little talks going on while he freshened up behind the glass wall.

"You look so cute all wrapped in that towel waiting for me..." He said once he opened the shower enclosure. Unlike you, he was all naked.

"You can unwrap me if you feel like" you raised one eyebrow.

Water still ran down his body since he did not dry at all. He grabbed his towel. "I'm not a rushed lamb anymore"

You nodded. "Interesting. I remember when we had our first time, I blinked and you were naked. That was so cute and... also hot."

"I was eager to feel you against my skin" he confessed covering himself and blushing.

Hwiyoung:

You observed Youngkyun methodically tucking his t-shirt in his jeans. He was clearly trying his best not to look messy after you gave him... an award! For helping you at cooking dinner for your parents. They were about to arrive by the way.

"We aren't like this. Reckless. What happened?" he wondered with the silliest smile.

You just srugged and turned around to check your hair in the mirror.

That was crazy.

Hwiyoung resumed "I haven't been this flustered about sex since our first time".

"You were a nervous wreck but that was cute" you remembered. Your boyfriend was absolutely precious, the way he tried not to look nervous being the best part.

"It feels like it was yesterday. At the moment I got inside you, all my worries disappeared. It felt really good, babe."

Chani:

Chani tossed around by your side, making you suspect that he was still awake.

"Honey?" you tried.

"Yes. Why are you still up?" he asked you back almost nonchalantly.

"I was about to ask you the same." you chuckled, then he surprised you by pulling you closer.

"Too many thoughts, baby girl. It sucks" he explained stroking your back gently.

Since you suffered from the same issue, you suggested a conversation to ease your minds. "Earlier today I remembered our first time"

He immediately felt warmth spreading inside him.

"I wasn't really good in bed back then though."

"Who told you that? That was pretty good, I enjoyed our time."

"I didn't know your body yet. Remember that you asked me to slow down?" he questioned embarrassed.

"I just wanted everything to last more" you confessed pecking his chin.

---

Did you read it 'till the end? what about liking and/or sending me some feedback xoxo

[bteezxyewriter12]

Player / 8

Pairing- San x Named Reader

Includes- Lots of fluff

Series Masterlist

San POV

Walking into Mingi's apartment, I make a beeline for Joanne

I texted her, asking if she was going to hang out with everyone tonight

She said she wasn't but I wanted to see her again and I asked her to come

I thought she'd blow me off but she agreed

"Hey Jo", I greet, sitting next to her

"Hey", she answers

She's not being hostile or feisty so that's good

I know our two dates went well but I never know for sure with her

She looks around then looks at me

"Did you...come alone?"

I nod

"Really? No girl to fuck tonight?", she snorts

I sigh

She still thinks I just want sex

I know we had fun on the dates but this shows me that I have to try harder to show her I'm not going to be like I used to be

Not with her

"No Jo. I told you that I wasn't going to be a player with you"

She raises her eyebrow, "You're shitting me. You really didn't bring a girl because of me?"

I nod

Honestly I can't even look at another girl

Not after going out with her

And thinking about fucking any girl....disgusts me

"Oh c'mon San. So what if you don't bring anyone where I can see. You could still be fucking them on your own time"

I shake my head, "I'm not. I promise I'm not. I told you I wouldn't hurt you and I won't."

She actually looks shocked, "Well uh ok"

I nod, then take the chance to hold her hand

In front of everyone

She lets me and she locks her fingers with mine

I was so surprised when she did that at the park and museum but so happy

God what is she doing to me where hand holding makes me ecstatic?

I glance at her and smile when I see her cheeks are pink

She's blushing and it's so cute

"Was your class good today?", I ask

She shrugs, "It was ok. Today wasn't a forensics class so it was kinda boring"

"What kinda class?"

She moves our hands to her lap, playing with my fingers absentmindedly

"Uh literature. Stupid required class"

"Don't you like to read?", I ask confused

She said that before when we ate at the amusement park

"Yeah San but I like to read for enjoyment. I don't like having to analyze every stupid line, find hidden meanings or think what the author meant when he wrote a certain chapter. It's stupid and gives me a headache"

I chuckle, "I'm sorry. It does sound annoying"

"Right? Like give it up. Maybe the author just wanted to write what he wrote with no deeper meaning. Most of them wrote for money back in the day anyway"

"They did?"

She nods, "Yup. Not all but some. That was the only class I had today"

"Did you work?"

She nods, "Yeah in the morning. My class was at 3:30. I worked from 8 to 2:30"

Yeah that's early

She has to be tired

"Register?"

She snorts, "No thank god. Making the drinks"

I just smile because she's so cute

And so anti social

"Did you nap today?", I tease

She raises her eyebrow, "Of course. I told you I'm lazy and nap all the time"

I shake my head, "You're not lazy. You worked and then went to school. And now you're here"

She shrugs, "How was work for you?"

"It was alright. New people came in and I had to test them. Some people are really out of shape and have no stamina"

She snorts, "That's me."

"You're not out of shape"

"Oh you think too good of me. I'm the most out of shape person you can meet. I eat like shit and I'm starting to get a belly"

Is she out of her mind?

I look at her stomach

She doesn't have a big belly, maybe a little baby pouch but that can be fixed easily.

"You do not"

She rolls her eyes, "You don't need to compliment me San"

"I'm uh kinda not. I'm just stating what I see"

"Uh, alright", she answers

"So if you're worried about it would you wanna come see the gym? If you have time?"

"Oh yeah ok. I remember I said I wanted to go. How about we have a gym date next?"

That sounds amazing

I love that she actually wants to go on a date with me

And she brought it up on her own

That has to be a good sign

"Definitely", I answer, trying not to sound too excited

"You want something to drink?", Seonghwa interrupts, coming to us "Beer? Shots?"

I shake my head, "No thanks I'm good"

Her head turns to me so fast, "You're not drinking?"

"No"

"Why?", she asks, surprised

I shrug, "I don't feel like it. And you're not drinking so I don't want to"

Her eyes pop out of her head

She's adorable and I like surprising her

Showing her there's more to me than the drunk man whore who's mean and makes fun of her

"You don't have to do that because of me"

"It's not all because of you. I don't feel like it right now. I don't want to be drunk. I want to spend time with you"

Her eyebrows shoot up, "Holy shit. So you can be sweet outside of a date"

I smile, nodding

"So no?", Seonghwa repeats, eyeing our hands

"No"

He shrugs and walks away

"You want anything else to drink?", I ask her

She shakes her head, "Nah I'm good for now"

I figure now is a good time to ask why she doesn't drink and I do

"Oh well uh, I used to up until last year."

"Did something happen?"

She nods and I brace myself for what I'm gonna hear

"Mingi and I were at a frat party and some guy put something in my drink."

I clench my jaw hoping this isn't going where I think it is

"I blacked out and don't remember anything. But Mingi, he always watched me when I used to get drunk. He saw the guy take me to his room. He followed us and got there before anything happened."

Thank god for Mingi

"Mingi said he kicked the shit out of the guy and took me home, to my apartment and he stayed with me. I woke up in my room and he told me what happened. He said that the guy got my shirt off but that's as far as it got before Mingi got there."

Jesus Christ

She could of been raped and never known it happened

That guy is a piece of shit and I want to kill him for trying that with her

Or with any girl

"I dunno the whole thing scared the shit out of me. Especially the memory loss. I still can't remember anything besides drinking that drink. It was the first one I had that night.", she says, "That's why I don't drink anymore. It's not like I was an alcoholic. I only drank at parties or clubs, not at home or anywhere else. But it's not worth it to me"

I nod, "Yeah I get it."

I understand completely why she'd want to stay away from alcohol

That's a scary situation to be in

"I'm glad nothing happened to you"

"Thanks", she smiles

"Mingi is a great friend", I comment

She nods, "Yeah he's the best. He can be annoying but we've been together since we were babies. He's kinda glued to me"

I get that

Seonghwa and I are best friends from when we were little too

He's older than me but he's always been like an older brother

"Are you two holding hands?", Jongho gapes, completely shocked

"What? Where?", Yeosang yells, running over from Mingi's fridge, "Oh my god!"

Why are they like this?

They're so embarrassing

I glance at her, her face so red

I start to pull my hand away from hers but to my shock, she tightens her grip on me

"Yes we're holding hands. Get over it", she answers

"But don't you hate him?", Yeosang asks

Oh what the fuck?

Seriously?

Why would he say that out of everything?

He could of said anything, string any words together and that is what he comes up with

Fucking genius

"Well obviously not if I'm holding his hand and went out on two dates with him. Dumbass"

I burst out laughing

Savage

"Two dates? I thought it was just one", Mingi says confused

"Well if you'd freaking call me like you're supposed to you'd know", she shoots back

My god she is so feisty

I love it

"Yunho knows! He calls me and asks how the dates went", she retorts

"Sorry! I'll call more jeez", Mingi mumbles

"You went on two dates?", Wooyoung repeats

I nod, "And we're uh going on a third?"

She nods, confirming, "Yeah"

"Wow that's great" Hongjoong says

"But still so weird. She used to stay far away from him. She never came to anything when he was going to be here but now she's going near him on purpose", Yeosang muses

"Yes we'll that's what happens on dates. You go near the person", she snaps

"Do...do you like him?", Jongho asks, like it's not something that's possible

They're really going hard on me

Like I'm not worthy of her

Being so surprised that she'd actually like me once she got to know me

"I'm getting to know him and so far yeah I like him. Back off"

I smile to myself, squeezing her hand softly

I like her telling them off

Putting them in their place

"Sorry", Jongho murmurs

"Yeah sorry", Yeosang repeats

She turns back to me, smiling softly at me

And I just grin back like a moron

I feel her head leaning back against my shoulder

She's falling asleep again

Seonghwa ordered pizza and we all ate, talking and joking around with each other

No one said anything else about me and her or made fun of me

Which is good because I think I may have flipped out if they did

Seonghwa put on a movie and we're just watching it, all of us spread all over his living room

When the movie started, I took another chance and put my arm around her

She immediately came closer, sort of cuddling into me and taking my other hand, holding it

I'm on fucking cloud nine

Her head falls forward and she sits up, her tired eyes opening

"Huh?", she says

"You ok?", I ask

She nods

I know she's exhausted

She's been nodding off for awhile, always waking up when she seems to fall asleep

"You should go home Jo. You're tired and falling asleep."

She shakes her head, "I'm ok"

"You sure? I can drive you home"

"No I want to stay. I'm ok."

I think she should go home to sleep but I can't make her

"You want to lay down and watch the movie?"

She shakes her head, her eyes back on the screen

A few minutes later she's drifting off again

Her head jerks up as she wakes up

I feel so bad for her

She whines and moves, sitting in my lap, her head on my shoulder, her face buried in my neck, arms around my body

I freeze not knowing what to do

When she doesn't move, I slowly wrap my arms around her, holding her to me

I hear her even breathing and I realize that she fell asleep

On me

In my arms

This is perfect

I can hold her all night

"Is she asleep?", Hongjoong asks

I nod, "Yeah. She's tired. She worked in the morning then had class. I told her I would take her home but she wants to stay"

"She just climbed on your lap, hugged you and fell asleep. I never thought I'd see her do that with anyone, let alone you", Yunho says

I can't get angry because he's right

I've never seen her be affectionate with any guy

Not even when she liked Hongjoong

She didn't flirt with him or get touchy feely

Maybe she's just so tired she doesn't know what she's doing

"Yeah. She's never been very affectionate but she is with you", Mingi says

"I think she really likes you San. She hated you but I really think you won her over", Seonghwa tells me

"I hope so", I answer, running my fingers in her soft hair

God I hope so

"You want me to drive her home after the movie?", Yunho asks

I shake my head, "I'll do that. Thanks"

He just nods turning his attention back to the tv

I just want to hold her in my arms for a little longer

Then I'll take her home and go home myself

For now, I keep playing with her hair and turn my attention back to the tv

@starry-jinnie @xduygu-arsx @derpjungkook

@tayyainthehood @alecanal93 @loveymochi

@aunt-mei @xciiiomwliah @chsani

@mingkisbitch @theaufanartist

[lavenderbexlatte]

Hello!!! Welcome to 🦋 anon's probably-way-too-overthought analysis on the m&m series in light of the new part. I have stopped crying and had about 24 hours to think, and I have discovered I have many thoughts, and this will probably be way more detailed than it should be.

The first thing I would like to address are some of the accusations Chan made at the end of the most recent part. (While I understand that they're supposed to not quite be accurate because of their obvious root in insecurity, and a lot of what I'm saying may just be like "yeah, obviously," I still would like to tell at the character a bit but I can't so this is what I have.)

Claim #1: "You fucking came at us at that party with your little girl-dom agenda and the guys fell for it, hook line sinker!"

This one's fairly self explanatory, no she didn't. They literally came onto her, even him, with his "There’s that pretty blush," and "Whatever you want it to be," lines. (And while yes, it's very likely that he was just trying to play it cool, but there's no way she could've known that, I'll come back to this later.)

Claim #2: "Nobody fucking asked me what I wanted!" "Nobody asked if I was sure that I wanted…"

Also mostly false, but he does have a tiny bit of a point. Yes, reader did grab his hair without asking, which is a little iffy, but she didn't actually rough with him until he goads her on. But I would argue that the reader is actually the ONLY one who asks him what he wants, if he's okay with things. While there may have been a little bit of discussion on the decision to approach the reader that we didn't see because of perspective (him saying this is kind of telling me that there wasn't, or at the very least not enough, maybe even some pressure for this to be the moment), or maybe Changbin said something while reader is with Jisung on the couch, after that, we don't see Jisung and Changbin check in with him at ALL, and there's not really an opportunity any other time for it just not have been noticed by the reader. As his partners, and the ones in the situation who have the full knowledge of Chan's situation, it should've been their responsibility to make sure he was alright throughout the process, even if they're not the ones in control for this situation, ESPECIALLY if they're going to keep this information from their Domme for the night (which really, I would say, wasn't a good idea, but no one is required to out themselves so I'll leave it alone).

HOWEVER, the reader does check with him, several times. She asks for boundaries/hard limits/etc before they even start anything, and while again, he's not required to say "hey, having a sexuality crisis, first time with a girl, kinda nervous," and he may not want to tip off Jisung and Changbin that something's wrong, that would be the time to say something like "I'm not feeling anything rough tonight, if you could be gentler that would be great." She asks them if there's anyone that doesn't actually want to fuck her. Also, she implements a safeword system (which she specifically calls him out to make sure he's okay with), which they weren't even going to USE, and asks them at least twice throughout the scene for their color, and Chan specifically if he's okay at least two more times besides that. Actually Chan almost makes fun of her for asking so many questions, so I think this claim is just another part of his insecurity-fed delusion that she's conspiring to ruin his life, or something, but again I'll come back to that. My point is that despite being the only one who doesn't know his situation, reader is also the only one who checks in with him.

There are a few other things he said that I took issue with, but those are the main two.

Next; Chan's delusion that reader is like conspiring to ruin his life. (Really like how you depicted this by the way, though I may be thinking wayyy too far into this.) I remember watching some video when I had one of my mental health/disorders hyperfixations. The video was about schizophrenia, and while I definitely don't think Chan has schizophrenia, one of the things the video talked about was types of delusions, and this kind of reminded me of one of them. I don't remember what it's called, but it's basically a delusion based around one idea, and then you force the world around you to fit into that idea. One example of this that I can think of is Azula from ATLA. Towards the end of her arc in the TV series, she starts seeing hallucinating her mother everywhere, and you get a peek of her fixed belief that her mother is behind everything that has gone wrong in her life, which is expanded upon a little bit in the books. Obviously Chan's not experiencing delusion to the extent that she did, but I did see some (albeit much less intense) parallels that were interesting. See, if he only talked about how his boyfriends seemed to like the reader more than him, that would be one thing, but he brings up his mother as well, which even though they did speak, it's a little out there to say that your mother likes someone she's talked to once more than you. That, combined with his insisting that the reader is playing some sort of game makes me think of that a little.

Of course this was only at first, when I was like "wtf, where is this 'my boyfriends like you more than me' thing coming from?" And then I reread the first few parts for this monstrosity of an ask that I'm writing rn. While at first I thought that this was entirely out of left field, when I read through the first few parts, especially the second one, with the knowledge that he felt that way, I noticed a few things you had put in there.

For the majority of the scene, or at least the first good chunk, the reader deals with Jisung and Changbin alone, leaving Chan by himself to watch. Obviously, as we see the reader's perspective, we know that it's because she found Chan's attitude intriguing and wanted to be able to deal with that one on one (at least that's what I got from it), it's easy to see now how to someone who's already insecure about their relationship and themselves, that would read as someone replacing you. Especially when Jisung, with no ill intent, but still, outright rejects his help in favour of the reader, and once again, he is left out, only this time it's accompanied with the sting of knowing (or at least feeling) that your partner didn't want you involved.

Now I kinda want to go character by character, and idk, talk about what I think they did wrong? We'll see, I'm not going to edit this so here we go.

Jisung and Changbin : Honestly, looking back on 3racha's first encounter with the reader, they really should have done better as Chan's partners. Like I said earlier, as the ones who knew Chan's situation, and the ones who likely pressured him slightly into he whole ordeal, it was really their responsibility to make sure Chan was okay with everything that was going on. That, and them feeling the need to sneak around with reader behind Chan's back doesn't sit right with me. I get that they have an open relationship, but there's a difference between having an open relationship and hooking up with someone your partner doesn't like, and actively trying to hide that you're hooking up with them. Their relationship boundaries may be fine with that, but idk, something feels off about it.

(I couldn't figure out where to put this and you may have already addressed this but it's my little theory/headcanon that Chan actually suspected it was reader at Jisung's place, and when there wasn't anyone there, he kinda gaslighted himself afterwards, idk. With the new knowledge it feels likely.)

Also, knowing that they were together for a while before Chan joined the relationship I think explains so much about the communication issues they seem to have with him. While I do think Chan has trouble communicating his feelings about things, I think their established communication and knowing eachother really well doesn't help. I may just be making things up at this point, but I feel like they have trouble with communication with Chan specifically, maybe forgetting that he doesn't have the same time/experience thy have with each other? If that makes sense?

Chan : oh boy. I've gone into a lot of detail already, so I'll try to keep this brief. Obviously, I think he has a looooottt of insecurity he needs to work through. If I were reallllyyy analyzing this I would say maybe a past cheating partner(?), but unless that's relevant to the plot I'm not sure if that's just me reading too much into this. Also mentioned before, COMMUNICATION ISSUES. One thing that would prevent half of the issues with this series is Chan communicating with his partners, though I suppose that wouldn't be near as much fun to read. Or just communicating I'm general, like I said, he had a plethora of opportunities to communicate to reader if he wanted something different, and didn't. So, yeah. Honestly I think he causes most of his own problems, but I feel like we knew that.

Reader : Now. I spent most of this series completely on the reader's side. Last night after reading part six, I was like "oh my god. He's right!" But then I took a while and thought a lot about it (as you can see), and honestly, I think reader probably did the least wrong out of everyone. Yes, the hair thing was a little iffy, like I said earlier, but once I went back and realized that he was actively participating and egging her on, I don't think that's necessarily something she did wrong. Beyond that, she did the most in regards of communication (at least during sex, after is another story), even more than the partners themselves. I think she did the best she could with the information that was given to her. She saw three guys approach her as a unit, and while yes, she didn't ask before engaging with Chan, I don't think it's really her fault for assuming that they were all interested as a unit as well. She had no reason to question any of their sexualities, why would she? She sees three partners approach her in unison, why wouldn't she assume they were on the same page? Anyway, all that to say, I think reader is the most innocent of all the main characters so far, though I may feel different after sitting on this for more time.

Anyway, here's this unedited brain dump, loved the new part, enjoy. Or not ig - 🦋

i've been sitting on this for like a week bc it's just so long and amazing??? and i have no idea what to say?? 🥺🥺

the bit about chan having a sort of delusion that reader is out to ruin his life in a pointed, conspired way is VERY interesting. their dynamic is actually something that i pulled from myself, in a way. i'm really superstitious about dumb things. i hate, like, bumping into someone or accidentally saying something that hurts someone's feelings bc i know that that karma/vibe/intention (whatever you wanna call it, i'm not spiritual just paranoid) is gonna come back around.

reader is the opposite. she's just walking around doing things and thinking about herself, and then being shocked when there are equal and opposite reactions to the stuff she does. i overthink everything, so reader doesn't think nearly enough.

but lemme say

that the best thing you said is how jisung and changbin are absolutely not the innocent bystanders that everyone seems to think they are 🤐🤐 most readers LOVE those two. but think about it...what are they trying to accomplish, here? 👀

[wendystales]

Memories - lrh (Chapter Thirteen)

Memories (also on Wattpad)

Chapter Twelve ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ Chapter Fourteen

I position myself in the center of the panel, making the 104th pose that morning. Brandon guides me from one shot to the next, making everything easier.

Six makeups. Six hairstyles. Six changes of clothes, even though the focus was on my face. Why did I get into this?

The photo shoot was for a cosmetics brand, for which I was the cover girl. It wasn't a 7-headed bug, as I had been thinking all night, which resulted in an irritating insomnia. And even though I arrived shy and lost, when I saw my look all produced, I felt like a great hottie, which gave me the confidence to go to that studio and rock.

I was having fun, as Leah advised me. I threw my hair, made faces and danced. I shifted my attention between Brandon's camera and my cell phone, where Nico, one of the helpers, was filming behind the scenes and stirring up my social medias.

It's fun, but after the fourth change of clothes, I was exhausted. After all, that spotlight doesn't leave me and the light gets too hot.

“For you.” Nico hands me a pink lilies bouquet. I open a smile, confused.

The team that was with me today, the agency, the brand and my parents had already sent me some bouquets earlier today, congratulating me and celebrating my return to the fashion world. So whose would it be?

I hunt for the card, opening it in a rush. Nico rested his head on my shoulder, wanting to read along with me. The handwriting didn't make me doubt, they were Luke's.

“To make your day more beautiful.

Congratulations on your return.

Love, Hemmo.”

I open a smile completely shaken by that. I burst out laughing when I see under his name “and the rest of 5sos” written in a different hand.

I ask Nico to take a picture of me with the flowers and send it to him, who quickly responds with a Petunia figure with heart eyes. I know I need to drop the bouquet and go back to the photos, but it feels so difficult.

Finally, I leave the flowers to the dressing room and I focus myself. Brandon praises my goofy smile and begs me to keep it up.

I knew everyone wanted to come today and watch the photo shoot, but I begged so hard not to. If without anyone I was already terrified of, seeing everyone there, staring at me, I wouldn't leave the dressing room.

[...]

Leah and Kiki were at my house, getting ready for Ashton's birthday, and of course, to gossip. They were both super curious to know how my first shoot was and how I was feeling.

besides telling about work, I comment about Luke's flowers and, finally, I tell about yesterday's dreams that still haven't left my head, taking root in my mind, blooming when I least expect it and leaving me out of breath.

“Oh, you naughty one!” Hastings tosses me the pillow. "Are you going to tell him?" she sits up in bed.

“No! How do I tell this?” I question, not understanding.

“Luke, I remembered when we were like two pervert rabbits and we were always having sex in the corners. Simple.” Kiki shrugs, going back to making up her eyes.

“Kiki!" I reprimand her. I hide my face, laughing embarrassed. "We weren't like that…I think…were we?" I look quickly at both of them.

Kiki looks at Leah, holding back her laughter. The brunette stares at me in disbelief. Oh my God, we were! It takes time to sink in, because with Stephen, I avoided sex at all costs. It was so cold and awkward, that most of the time I was bruised and, in all cases, unfulfilled.

I remember the touch of the dream and how it felt so soft and intense, and so good. However, I still find it hard for me to have been so turned on that I started having sex everywhere.

“Are you sure?” I ask suspiciously.

"Oh, honey! I will have to tell you about my dad's birthday, have I?" Leah hugs me, making Kiki laugh.

"What about your father's birthday?" the same way I was feared of Luke when he started telling me about the day I threw up at his feet, I get with Leah.

“Well, it was my dad's 50th birthday. A big, big party and of course I invited all of you. We had just got back from Milan, you were away from Luke for a couple of weeks, so you’re kinda getting crazy by missing him.

"Make it crazy." Kiki comments.

“The plan was for us to arrive in the morning, you'd have time to see each other, and then in the evening we would go to the party. But our flight was delayed and you didn't have that time. So you decided to open the bathroom.” Leah gives a fake smile.

I took a few seconds to understand, and then I widen my eyes, wanting to sink into the ground. I can't believe we did this.

“Calm down! She didn’t told the best part”. Kiki leaves the bathroom, joining us.

“Oh, that's cool, is there a better part?” I look at them both desperately.

"Of course, there is a best part. Leah escorting you guys out of the bathroom" Kiki throws herself on the bed, laughing. “Oh God! Your faces were the best.”

“Was after that our friendship beat all the limits and you know, we got really close.” Leah smiles to me.

What was my problem? Oh Lord, I never, ever, in my all life, thought I'd give one of those. If anyone asked me, who would be most likely to do this, I would definitely say Leah, Kiki, and even Bethany, but I would never say my name.

What did Luke do to me?!

I look at my friends, shocked. They both start laughing, amused by my reaction. A few seconds later, I give up, starting to laugh too.

"Is there any other similar situation that I should know about?" I inquire with fear.

"Yes, but we don't have time right now." Kiki gets up from the bed, slapping my foot, asking me to get ready.

We turned on the music and continued to get ready. Leah goes down to the kitchen, returning with three beers. The subject changes and we start to gossip.

After hours of producing us, I come down wearing my silver sequin jacket, finding Leah with another beer in her hand.

“Well? Good? Great?” I take a stroll, showing off the leather pants and black tank top that valued my tattoo.

"I definitely would ask for your number!" she replies, making me smile.

"Do you think people will like it? I mean, isn’t that much?” I stop in a few poses while she watches me.

“Rephrase the question.” she leans against the table. I stare at her without understanding. “What you want to know is whether Luke will like it." I open my mouth a few times.

“Perhaps.” I answer softly. Hastings snorts, hiding her face.

“You two should pay for my therapy. Because it's not easy to take it.” she takes a deep breath.

I give a guilty smile. I head to the bar, grabbing a shot of tequila and flipping it quickly. I would find Luke in a few minutes and I still don't know how to face him. I close my eyes, letting the alcohol burn my throat and warm my body, along with the memories. The flashes come back to my mind, clear as water. I can hear the girls' voices again, telling them about Mr. Hastings' 50th birthday.

“Let's go?” Kiki's scream brings me back. Standing near the door, they wait for me to down another shot of tequila before we go.

Along the way, we took several photos, already moving our social medias. At the door of the restaurant, the swarm of paparazzi was already in place and as soon as we got off the car, they surrounded us. Hands and arms linked, the three of us entered, being saved by the huge walls that didn't let them see anything that happened inside.

We went to the back of the restaurant, in a more reserved space, where a long table took up half the back wall. Right away I spot Luke, laughing as he chats with Jack and another guy I don't recognize. I analyze your look, social pants and a black t-shirt.

How can someone look so beautiful, so simple?

I swallow hard when he notices our approach and looks directly at me. I look away, unable to hold on; the images screamed in my mind.

Irwin approaches, already quite excited, trying to hug the three of us at the same time. When Leah and Kiki go to greet the other guests, I calmly hug my best friend, congratulating him once more.

“Make yourself comfortable and behave” he leaves a kiss on my forehead, going to welcome other guests who have just arrived.

I turn in time to see Hemmings approaching, one glass in his hand and the other in his pants pocket. How? I hold my breath, giving a terrified smile. He opens his smile even more.

“Hey!” he says excitedly, close enough for me to hear. Those lips… what have they done… I close my eyes quickly, shutting my mind.

“Hey!” I answer awkwardly.

“How are you doing?” he hugged me, pressing a kiss to the corner of my mouth. I close my eyes again, feeling it radiate with amazing speed throughout my body. I let out a breath in a sigh. I manage to catch his eyes as he walks away, hiding a more mischievous smile.

“Well!” my cheeks catch fire and the jacket starts to bother me. "Thanks for the flowers earlier today." I thank, while Luke leads me to the bar. His hand firmly on my waist reminds me of that hotel room. I bite my lip, holding back the urge to bang my head on the counter. "A shot of tequila." I ask desperately.

Luke raises his eyebrows in surprise but says nothing. I turn it over without a single thought, asking for another one, just in case. The heat that spreads through my body is the result of three doses ingested. I take off my jacket and, through the bar mirrors, I see Luke shamelessly sweep my body.

“It was nothing!” he says after clearing his throat. "I'm glad you liked it. So, how was your first shoot?” he leans his elbow on the counter, propping his head on his hand, visually interested.

The effect of the alcohol starts to kick in, and so I feel lighter in his presence, not bothering with the memories between the two of us, nor the fanciful situations that my mind starts to create. I tell about the rehearsal and how fun it really was to do it. In the middle of the answer, I get enthusiastic, telling everything in minute detail. Luke looks at me smiling and interested, without interrupting me.

“I’m sorry!” I cover my eyes, laughing. “I'm talking too much.”

A few more people had already arrived, but the two of us were still there, sitting at the bar. The most interesting thing was, everyone who arrived didn't dare come here and interrupt us.

“No! I love hearing you talk.” he smiles before taking another sip of gin. I lower my gaze, totally ashamed.

"I think we'd better go sit down." I comment, seeing everyone settling into their chairs.

“Let's go?” he offers his hand, helping me off the stool. I hold into his arm, walking to the table. "Should I keep an eye on you today?" he laughs. I repress the urge to say yes, but that's not the answer to his question.

“No! I won't drink that much.” I press my lips together in a thin line, embarrassed by Ash's party.

We sat next to each other, with Calum and Noah in front of us. Luke leans his arm on the back of my chair and I'm not shy about getting close to him, even with everyone in our group staring at us curiously. We embarked on a lively conversation with everyone around us.

Michael rushes in and apologizes for being late, taking his seat next to Hemmings.

"Was she with her?" I hear Luke ask, taking my full attention.

“Yep!” Mike gives a shy smile.

“Who she?” I almost walk through the body of the australian beside me, wanting to get close to Mike.

“Nobody special.” he shrugs.

“Yeah! Go for it.” Hemmo lets go, laughing. Michael slaps him on the head.

“It's nobody special. Just a friend. I swear!" he closes the matter, but he doesn't convince me.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me about it." I whisper, complaining to the blonde at my side.

“Sorry, there was no time. Also, I didn't even know it could lead to anything.” he shrugs. I stare Luke, waiting him to continue, but he is easily distracted by the napkin holder. I slap his head like Mike. “Ouch! What was it?” he looks at me shocked.

“Tell me!” Luke turns to face me, rolling his eyes.

“Her name is Sophie. They met at a Fortnite stream. She beat him and he went to congratulate her on the match, so they started talking and apparently it’s hitting something.” Luke shrugs, finishing the story.

“This is so cute. I hope it works!” I see Michael laughing over Luke's shoulder. “Is she pretty?” I question.

“This is a dangerous question.” I look back at him, confused. "Is there a chance you slap me?" I laugh.

"No." I don't get why I would hit him for finding someone pretty.

“She is pretty!" I hit him. “Hey! You said I wouldn't be hitten.” he accuses me.

“Sorry, it's just funny.” I defend myself by laughing. Luke turns forward, annoyed. I wrap my arm around his, which were on the table and come closer, placing a kiss on his cheek. "Are you going to be mad at me?" I question laughing.

"And I can do it?" he turns to me. His eyes drop to my lips and mine to yours. It would be a perfect time for a kiss, but I don't feel comfortable with all these looks on us.

Hemmo seems to understand my internal battle and just leaves a kiss on my forehead. I open a grateful smile and once again guide my attention to the conversation between Noah and Brian.

After a couple of hours of eating and drinking. We started to spread out through space, forming several conversation circles. I was having a blast with everyone. We sing, dance and record videos that we'll definitely regret later.

After starting to eat, I stopped drinking alcohol, after all, trauma still reigns inside me. So I wouldn't feel like the only sober one at the party, Hemmings decided to join me, stopping drinking too.

Relieved, of course, is the word to describe this night with him. I thought it would be hard to look at it with everything I remembered, but it was so light and fun, I admit I freaked out over nothing. As usual!

All through dinner, I try not to pay too much attention to everyone's eyes on us. We simply could not do anything that someone just needed to die of love. Luke was amused, while I just wanted to sink into the ground.

Yes, I may have had a clue as to how much I feel about Luke, but I still want to take it easy. I want to be sure, and for that, I need to stop being afraid. I know he's been realizing how I've changed and I'm letting him get closer and closer.

Our kisses, touches and smiles. Everything is falling into place and the fact that he doesn't put pressure on me helps me a lot. I already totally trust him, it just makes stronger.

Considering it was easy to stay close to him, without letting the shame take me, I didn't pull him away for a second, because most of the time he pulled me along and I liked that. I like being close to him.

“One round. Just one round.” Jack pleads, hands clasped under his chest.

“No! I've had too much today.” Luke denies it again, making his friend fake a dramatic cry.

"You drank when you arrived. A beer and a shot of gin. That's nothing.”

“I'll drive later and I'm keeping Marnie company.” he squeezes me tighter to his chest.

"Can't you drink?" Jack looks at me confused.

“Of course I can, I just don't want to, you know, make a scene. Or something like that.” I shrug. Jack rolls his eyes, turning back to Luke.

“One round.” he begs, making me laugh.

The boys were preparing a round of Answer or Drink with 10 different types of drink. So, they played and still got drunk.

“No!” Luke responds with a laugh.

For a few seconds, I leave the two of them arguing and go to the table to get my coat. With the lack of alcohol, I start to feel the cold of the air conditioning. On my way to the table, a voice stops me.

“Look what a wonderful surprise.” I turn quickly, feeling all the blood freeze through my body. "What a coincidence, isn't it?" I watch his smirk, knowing what his presence there would do.

“What are you doing here, Stephen?” I take a breath deep, controlling the urge to fly at him. Just like I did with Pam.

It's the first time we've seen each other since the diary report and I couldn't feel more disgust and loathing.

“It's a public place, Lizzie, and don't worry, I didn't come chasing you. I'm with friends.” he points to a table. “I just came to say hello.”

“Don't call me Lizzie, you know I hate it and why don't you take your fake education and stick it in your…”

“What are you doing here?” Luke walks past me, coming face to face with Stephen. "I already told you to stay away from her."

Soon, all the boys approach, ready to intervene. I grab his arm, trying to keep him close to me.

“Let him.” I beg, not wanting it to explode in the middle of the restaurant.

“Calm down, Hemmings.” the name comes out acid and full of poison. “I just came to say hello to Lizzie.” he laughs, hands in his pockets. "Don't worry, I'm not kissing her."

I close my eyes, feeling that hit both of us. That's low, very low. Luke steps forward, taking me with him. Noah and Jack are already starting to put their hands between them. Ash, Mike and Calum begin to put their hands on their friend's shoulders, pulling him along.

“Do not worry. I'm not going to spend my time punching him. But I'll just say one thing, Stephen.” he uses the same acid tone to say his name. "In case you're still dumb enough not to understand. It’s over! What you and Marnie had is over! So stop coming after her, because she doesn't want anything to do with you. She is with me.”

His tone of voice and body postureme impress. I've never seen Luke like this, so nervous, holding back so he doesn't explode, the veins in his neck bulging, proving how much he's controlling himself. I tighten your arm more tightly around my body. I bring my hand down until it's entwined with his, deceptively hoping that it will calm him down and bring him back to me.

“Funny. Cause from what I heard, you guys broke up, didn't you? What? You couldn’t stood the cheat?” he laughs, like he's made a great joke.

I don't know if he intended to hit Luke again, but without realizing it the words hit me. My blood boils and the words written in my diary take shape in my mind. Damn imagination.

I let go of my hand, putting myself in front of Stephen, who takes a step back. His gaze, full of curiosity and mockery, fixes on me.

“That’s enough, Stephen! I don't care about you. Pretend I never called you, just like I was before the accident and disappear from my life. I know you cheated on me and I don't want this torment in my life anymore. Go away.” I let go of everything contained, trying not to fly off his neck.

"Are you really going to believe their bullshit?" Stephen crosses his arms.

“Nobody had to tell me. I remembered." I see his eyes lose their mocking sparkle and he lose confidence. It's a lie, but he don't need to know. “There are at least twenty people here and they all want to hit you, including me, who wouldn't mind breaking my cast on your head. So if you don't want to get out of here on a stretcher, get out!”

I take a step back, feeling my heart pound and trying my best to keep myself from crying. Luke's agitated breath pulses against my spine. I lean against him, feeling his hand intertwine with mine, squeezing it delicately. Amazing how I feel safer, just with that touch.

Stephen passes his eyes around everyone and walks away without saying anything else. When his body pulls away, I release all the air I didn't even know I was holding. The boys start telling us to go back to the table.

I turn, pulling Luke, who is still standing there, facing my ex, who is sitting at the table with a group of friends. He turns around, pulling me easily into his arms. His hands tighten around my waist and I feel him exhale against my neck, giving me goose bumps. I stroke the back of his neck, trying to calm him down and show him that everything is fine.

We walked back to the table, striving for the mood from before. Ashton orders his birthday cake and we ourselves lull into the music, excited, mocking Irwin. While we devoured the cake, no one broaches the subject and I thanks for that. I know Hemmings and I will probably talk about it, but I don't want to involve the guys in this.

Gossip reigns at the table again. The entire group is engaged in conversation about the most disastrous trips ever made, minus the blonde and me. I watch him with his jaw still set and his gaze filled with rage, fixed directly on Stephen, who is across the room, staring at me.

It's a cycle: Luke stares at Stephen, who stares at me, while I stare at Luke.

I feel terrible for making him go through all of this. My amnesia, our breakup, my ex's return. Lucas doesn't deserve any of this. I need to reward him, but how?

“Hey!” I whisper, resting my chin on his bicep, but he doesn't hear me. "I want to leave, will you take me?" I question, hoping to gain any sign of him.

He looks at me nonchalantly, then blinks back to reality. Luke stares at the bleached on the other side, wanting to see if he's still trying something. I drop a small kiss on his shoulder, gaining his attention again.

“Of course! Let's go?” I nod, getting up.

Nobody is opposed to our leaving, I believe as much because of what happened as because it was the two of us. We walked across the room hand in hand, and with me clutching his arm, just to make sure he didn't fly into someone.

But I need to remember that Luke is just as classy as I am. Not just for the fame or the spectacle it would be, but because he was brought up that way. Educated not to go into violence, even if there was someone on the other side who deserved to be slapped.

I'm scared by the frantic flashes that start to pop when they notice the two of us. I cling closer to Luke, who makes room for his car. The delay for the questions to start is just for them to reason that it was the two of us there, together, after announcing our break up.

I keep my head down, focused on his thumb moving up and down, stroking my skin. Luke opens the car door and I settle in, still feeling the flashbulbs burst above us.

With great difficulty, we got out of that sea of ​​people. We remained silent until we reached the intersection of the main lane that led to my house.

“Do you want to go home?” he asks, softly.

I can't identify any feelings in your voice. He is neutral, indifferent. Apart from the isolated fact, this night has been amazing and I don't want it to end, not in this mood.

“No!” I turn in the seat, facing him. "Isn't there anywhere I'd love to go? Or that we both went a lot?” for the first time, I see a glint run through his eyes.

“Yeah! In fact, there are two.” he cracks a smile, causing me to smile too.

Luke takes the other path, heading to some place I couldn't even imagine. The subject comes up between us and so the mood softens. As we talk, I list a number of places I've always liked in Los Angeles, wanting to guess where it would take me.

We turn onto Wilshire Boulevard and I guess where we're going. Hemmo parks his car near the Urban Light and I look forward to getting out of the car.

Before we exit the vehicle, he pulls two caps from the glove compartment, giving me a dark gray one. I look at that accessory, wondering if it was always mine, if we always wore it when we went out.

“Why am I not impressed that this would be the first place?” I question, holding his hand.

By the time, the sculpture was a little empty, with only a few couples taking pictures. Luke and I went unnoticed, walking between those huge poles.

We walked around, with me admiring those lighted poles. I've always liked this sculpture, I've always found it romantic because so many people are proposed here, and I love the lighting.

“Oh no!” I push Luke, finding your phone pointed at me.

"This one got blurry." he laments, pointing again.

“Luke!” I exclaim laughing. I try not to scream so as not to draw attention to both of us.

“Sorry about my behavior at the restaurant.” Hemmings says after a while, surprising me. I lean against a pole, watching him.

“Why are you apologizing?” I frown. Luke leans against the same post, shrugging.

"I didn't mean to spoil your night." he answers.

“You didn't! If there is one responsible, it is him! Stephen knows he shouldn't have shown up there.” I comfort him.

His blue eyes meet mine. I take a step toward him, standing on tiptoe, reaching for his lips, leaving a simple kiss there. Without pulling away completely, I see a goofy smile appear on his face, which also appears on mine.

"What's our second place?" I whisper, next to him.

“My bed.” he lets go.

“Lucas!” I push him away, laughing again. His laugh is contagious. If he knew about the memories…

“Just kidding." Uh-hm… "Ready to get full of sand?" he asks, holding out his hand.

“Always!” I grabbed, leaning my head on his arm as we made our way to the car.

Follow me on Twitter: aquela_wendy

[atsunflower]

Stargazing — Intro

Rated: SFW

Author Notes: this is the first installment for Suna's part on throne!au. I'm struggling to post stuff because of the tags, so yeah. Please enjoy your reading

Warnings: mentions of shots and guns, kids being stalked, language and cigar smoking.

I — Intro

Previous || Next

The air felt burning inside of his lungs and the pain was stinging his calves. The two boys running ahead weren't any different and he knew he had to make a decision before the approaching footsteps got even more closer.

Suna Rintaro was only sixteen. Even if it was duty, he didn't feel ready to sacrifice himself for the sake of the pair before him.

After all, he was too young for this yakuza shit.

Analyzing his surroundings, he tried to come up with a route to escape. The brunette could see alleys and recesses left and right, but none of them seemed safe enough to be a hideout.

"We're screwed." He heard Osamu cursing under his breath. The less annoying twin wasn't wrong, but it was a surprise to see him so distressed.

"We gotta do somethin' to save our asses." Atsumu whisper-yelled, trying to come up with a plan. His seriousness was short lived when a shot cut the air somewhere behind them "Fuck!" The blonde shrieked.

The brunette sighed. A decision was made. 

"Yo, you two." The calling came in a low tone, gathering their attention "Listen up. You two are hiding inside the next alley we see by our left, I'll slow down and make them follow me. Then you'll run away as fast as you can, when we're out of your sight." Suna explained, knowing the half-assed plan was the only alternative. Even panting, his voice sounded unwavering and he felt proud of it.

He knew the kobun would be proud of it.

"Absolutely not!" Osamu's voice thundered as the two Miya halted their steps "What kinda leaders ya think we gonna be? D'ya expect us to leave ya here to die?" The younger twin grabbed a handful of Suna's shirt, shaking the taller male.

"Nope, but you can't be the head of shit if you two start a worm farm six feet under." He deadpanned, freeing himself from the other's grip.

"Well damn, it's an order then. Yer not leavin' us." Atsumu butted in, trying to rush them.

Another shot echoed, the three of them flinching at the loud sound. At this point, none of the boys had hopes of running away from the men after them.

A giggle startled the three.

"Hah, rich kids are so cute!" Turning to the voice, they saw a girl with crooked teeth and ripped jeans. Suna frowned, taking a step forward.

"Who are you?" He asked, trying to sound menacing.

"Me?" The weird girl giggled again "I'm the one saving your asses."

Looking around the place, he didn't know why he remembered that scene just now.

Maybe you have the talent to drag people to this mess, the man thought to himself.

Through the glassdoor, staring at the far corner of the ballroom, he observed a woman sitting lonely and miserable. Today was supposed to be her great day, but thanks to him, it wasn't the case.

The male didn't even know why he felt this way.

"Why are you here, looking all sad when a fancy-ass party is going on inside?" The giggle in mockery remained the same years after they met.

The woman before him grew up to a beauty and got rid of the damned crooked teeth — though it didn't change the shit-eating grin permanently etched to your face.

Beautiful or not, you were still a pain in the ass.

"Are you sad because the woman you love is now married to the enemy?" The man sighed in annoyance.

"Your talent to talk shit all the time is fascinating, you know." The brunette brushed you off, taking his attention back to the other woman "And I could ask you the same, why are you here, bugging me of all people?"

You scowled.

"Don't get so full of yourself, I came to watch the sky." He observed as you opened your shoulder bag, reaching for the pack of cigarettes. You tucked one of the sticks between your lips, before lightening it. He laughed at the solemn gaze you held into the skyline.

"You and this weird habit of yours. What star are you trying to see in the middle of fucking Tokyo?" Like always, the brunette asked not really expecting an answer from you.

Smoke went past your mouth as you closed your eyes.

"Ueno was a hellhole, but at the least the sky was beautiful." You started "Every single night, I miss it. Not that shitty neighbourhood, but climbing the roofs and stargazing the night away." There was a longing within your irises that he never saw before. Strange.

"Why are you saying this, all of sudden?" The man asked, truly dumbfounded. You weren't behaving like yourself.

"I don't know, Rintaro. But my guts say something is gonna happen." You smothered the cigarette butt against the rail "And I'm afraid of not seeing stars for one last time." Feeling unsettled, Suna frowned, following your gaze to the Tokyo lights.

He believed you. After all, your instincts were never wrong.

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[trikxx]

Hey besties im backkkk😙! Im trying to get another chapter of my Kenma story but I need some time so im just going to write for this one.

Songs for this chapter:

• losin control - russ

• first fuck - 6lack, jhene aiko

( ⚠️this chapter mainly contains smut(degrading & edging)⚠️)

A few days later🧍🏽‍♀️

"Hey y/n are you awake?" Denki says. Y/n groans "now i am." Denki huffs and slowly opens the door and goes in the room. "I made breakfast. But I wanted to talk to you." He says looking at her pinging phone.

"You cant keep ignoring him y/n."

"Why should it matter Denki?"

"You should go and talk to him. No you are going to talk to him cause you can't keep locking yourself in here and not talking about your feelings. You both need to talk to each other and talk it out." Y/n lets his words sink in.

"Denki-"

"No. Get dressed we are are going back so you can talk to him."

Y/n rolls out the bed after Denki leaves the room. 'Why?' Y/n thought to herself as she pulled out some clothes.

Y/n looks at her phone analyzing the messages sent by Shinsou and sees some from Shindo who she occasionally texted only cause he was being annoying.

Hitoshi☄️: y/n. You dont have to come back and stay can we at least just talk.

Hitoshi☄️: nvm take you time.

'That was the last message he sent huh?' Y/n thought

Shindo.: Hey just want to ask if you wanted to hang out today?

Shindo.: You there?

Shindo.: y/nnnnnnnn😃.

Shindo.: are to shleepingggg🙂

*1 missed call from Shindo.*

"Dude." Y/n said making a irritated face. 'Am i about to text him back....yes cause why not. Shinsou can be player why cant I. I mean just a little sum sum to get my mind off that douche Hitoshi.'

Y/n🌸🤍: sorry I was sleep.

Y/n🌸🤍: yea sure we can hang out. What time and where.

Shindo.: Heyyyyy!

Shindo.: Any time is good for me. Maybe at Venice😗?

Y/n🌸🤍: Cool! I'll text you the time when I figure it out.

Shindo.: Do you want me to pick you up?

Y/n🌸🤍: no its ok. I have to do a few things so ill meet you there.

Shindo.: ok see you later then😏.

Y/n🌸🤍: cant wait🤗

'Bitch what the fuck was "cant wait🤗"' y/n thought to herself as she did her hair.

"Falling in love now lossing control now~" y/n sang along with the lyrics 'damn a bitch really in her feels.'  Y/n giggled and went to get her outfit out

Y/n sat back down on the bed. 'Maybe i should take my truck. No Denki wouldn't let me.' Y/n thought

____

"Do we really have to go?" Y/n asked. "Yes." Denki responded bluntly. Y/n rolled her eyes and went back to the room and called Mina.

*incoming call from Y/n😃✨*

Mina picked up her phone and answered quick.

Mina: Hey babes! How are you feeling?

Y/n: Im feeling ok, Denki is making me go talk to him

Mina: I agree with Denki you should talk to Hitoshi before you go and.... ya know... pop ya pussy fa a grand

Y/n: Mina noo

Mina: Im kidding im kidding.... unless..

Y/n: Nope. Thats enough.

Mina: Put ya p*ssy lips on live i give ya a thousand dollas

Y/n: Bye Mina.

Mina: No waittt-

*call ended*

___

Y/n giggles and lays back on the bed. 'I wonder how this is gonna go' . "Lets go y/n im ready." Y/n grabs her phone and keys and follows Denki out the house.

"Can I take my-" "no." Denki said. "Well shit."

"Y/n. You've been ignoring him and sulking for too long. We need y/n back." Denki said keeping his eyes on the rode.

"Can I play some music at least?" Y/n asked "Yea. What ever floats your boat and gets you to talk to Shinsou."

____

"I'm ready." "Ok lets go." He responds. Denki and Y/n walk out to Denki's car and he pulls out the driveway and drives to Y/n and Shinsou's apartment.

"You go in ill wait out here for you." Denki said. "Tch. Ok" y/n said getting out the car.

Y/n walked into the lobby "Hello ms. Y/n." The woman at the desk says. "Hey." Y/n says walking past to the elevator and then pressing 5.

There was many thoughts going through y/n's head.

'Should I actually do this.'

'Why am i here.'

'I should have taken my car any way and went somewhere else'

'Fuck him i should leave'

'Is it my fault?'

"FUCK!" Y/n yelled right before the elevator stopped. There was someone waiting and they looked at her crazy. "Sorry." Y/n said walking past them soon putting her hands in her pockets.

___

Y/n was standing outside the apartment with the key in the door debating if she should go in or not.

Y/n takes the key out the door and turned to walk away. But the door opens "y/n ?" Shinsou says standing in the door way shirt less. His eyes puffy and his eyes looking more restless then usual.

Shinsou runs toward y/n immediately enclosing her in a hug dipping his head into the space between y/n shoulder and neck. "Y/n im sorry! I should have known! I- I wasn't thinking!" Shinsou said. "Please forgive me." He continued pulling away to look y/n in her eyes.

"Y/n?" He said again looking into her teary eyes. Y/n hugs Shinsou tightly. "I missed you." Y/n say crying on to Shinsou's chest. They walk in to the apartment and sit down on the couch.

"Soo what have you been doing Shinsou?" Y/n says looking at Shinsou while he scrambles around to pick up the stuff that was out of place. "I've been..." he stops. "Its ok to tell the truth. Im not gonna judge you Toshi."

Shinsou blushes cause he hadn't heard the nickname in a while. "Well.. crying and trying to get in contact with you." He says. "Sorry I wasn't answering i've kinda been ignoring everybody." Y/n says with a small chuckle while leaning onto Hitoshi's shoulder.

"I missed you y/n." Shinsou says. Y/n lifted her head up and looked at Shinsou he looked back. "You kn-"

⚠️ne noor ne noor mayday mayday⚠️

⚠️smut⚠️

Y/n was cut off by Shinsou's lips crashing into hers. Y/n kissed back and moved closer to him deepening the kiss.

Shinsou grabbed her butt making y/n moan into the kiss. This turned him on more. He pulled y/n on to his lap. Y/n put her arms around his neck and closed the space between them.

___

Yes y/n and Shinsou were best friends but they fucked a little bit here and there. Shinsou had feeling for y/n and he really wanted her but he didn't want to ruin their relationship. Y/n had feelings but she didn't want a relationship because of what happened with Todoroki.

But theres only a matter of time before every ting becomes clear. Right?

___

Shinsou picks up y/n and carries her to her room and laying her on the bed not breaking the kiss. He tugs at the bottom of her shirt and she nods. Shinsou begins to pull y/n's shirt off breaking the kiss. He takes off his sweats and climbs on to the bed hovering over y/n's frame.

"Beautiful little fuck." Shinsou says with a smirk then taking off y/n's shorts.

He tosses the shorts to the floor then dips into y/n's neck immediately finding her sweat spot and starts leaving hickeys and love bites.

Shinsou starts kissing y/n again slowly brushing his fingers down her body stoping at the band of her underwear.

Shinsou begins to rub y/n's clothed clit "ahh~". He smirked and stop and started removing y/n's panties. Shinsou bit his lip at the sight. "So wet already." He said. Shinsou goes back to kissing y/n.

He inserts a finger into y/n. "Shinsou~" y/n moans. She feels Shinsou smirk on her lips as he adds another finger. "Like that? Fucking slut." Shinsou says breaking the kiss and speeding up his pace.

Y/n felt her core tighten up "im gonna cu-" Shinsou abruptly stopped. "What the fuck Shinsou?!" Y/n says. "Aw did I get your hopes up?" "Fuck you." Y/n spat. "Oops- wrong answer." Shinsou said smiling.

"What?" Y/n asks. "Shin- ah~" Shinsou dipped his fingers back into y/n going at a fast pace. "Fuck~"

Y/n relaxed her body knowing she was about to release but Shinsou stopped. "FUCKKKK! WHY DO YOU KEEP DOING THAT!" Y/n yells. "So I have to say it don't cum till I say so." Shinsou says.

"Ok." Y/n responds but Shinsou doesn't budge. "Ok what?" He said with a straight face. Y/n held back her smile "ok Shinsou." She said deciding to dance with the devil. "You little fuck." Shinsou said with a smile.

Shinsou puts both of y/n's legs on his shoulders and puts his arms around her legs keeping them in place. He lick a "mmm y/n you taste so good." Y/n threw her head back and slipped her hands into Shinsou's hair.

"Fuck! Ah~" y/n moaned. Shinsou started to go faster "SHIT SHIT SHIT!" Shinsou got harder at the sound of y/n's moans. He couldn't wait any longer. Shinsou wanted to break y/n. He wanted to feel her around him.

"I'm gonna-" "yes princess cum on my face" "cum for me!" Shinsou demanded and Y/n obeyed. "FUCK~"

Shinsou let y/n finish then he kissed her. He then pulled of his boxers and threw them with the rest of their clothes. Y/n sat up on the her elbows as Shinsou started kissing her again. He positioned himself at y/n's entrance.

"I want to hear you beg. Beg for me to fuck you senseless." Shinsou demanded "please" "please what." "Please fuck me!"

"I said beg bitch!"

Y/n let of a quiet groan when Shinsou yelled. He could way all night for her to beg just edging her for hours on in.

"Please fuck me! Ughh~ please!" Y/n whined out. "Good girl~" Shinsou purred as he put his hand on y/n's stomach to feel him self going in count each inch.

"1~"

"2 fuck~"

"3~"

Y/n threw her head back as he went further "cant take it?" Shinsou said voice laced in lust.

"7~"

"8 ughhhh~" he said throwing his head back.

Shinsou pulled y/n closer to him and kissed her neck starting to stroke slowly at a gruesome pace for y/n. "Faster~" y/n moaned out. Shinsou smirked and pulled out. Y/n loudly groaned "stop fucking teasing~" she whined pulling Shinsou back on to the bed and getting on top.

"What do you think your doing." Shinsou says with a smirk. "Something you wouldn't."  Y/n said lowering herself down. Before she could get past tip Shinsou flipped over with him on top and went the way in and started going at a brutal inhuman pace.

"Is this what you wanted, fucking slut!"

____

'Y/n has been in there for a long time' Denki thinks getting out the car. " im gonna go check on them."

Denki walks into the apartment building. "Good evening sir. Is there anything you need help with?" The woman at the desk said.

"Uhh...actually yes do you know which apartment.. Hitoshi Shinsou stays in." "Yes apartment 503." "Thank you" Denki says walking away.

'503. 503. 503.' Denki repeated in his head while in the elevator and while walking to the door. Denki knock on the door but noticed it moved when he made contact. "Bitc- oh its open. Scary~" Denki slowly walks into the apartment. "Damn this is nice."

Denki goes to find Shinsou's room. As he gets closer to what he think is Shinsou's room he hears moans he decides to stop and just listen.

"What are you doing."

"Something you wouldn't."

Denki heard something hit the bed and then a loud whine.

"Is this what you wanted, fucking slut!"

"SHINSOU~"

Denki couldn't bare the screams. "Y/N ARE YO- oh~" "Looks like we have a guest Y/n." Shinsou says looking at Y/n. "You like this y/n?" Be continued with a smirk. "Ah~ please- s-slow down" Y/n whined

[paipayaseeds]

Kaito may have been a documented idiot, with a good heart might I add, though he'd have good intentions in mind whenever a fruitless and rash act was made by the man who lacked a few parts of his cranium,

It shouldn't have come to a fucking shock to anyone that this fucker didn't read a LICK of the student hand book. Probably hadn't even bothered to skim through the darn thing just a bit. Now here they were, dumbfounded and annoyed at the man's decision.

Of course, Kaede didn't show her frustration.

"Well, then Anya is safe and.. Kaito just was taking.. Precautions-"

"Just say he was being dumb,kid." Ryoma interrupted, the man not having been afraid to state the obvious.

".. Okay he didn't do the smartest thing but! It's fine! I'm sure Kirumi and Tenko are handling this. How about we all just move to the dining hall for now?"

"I suppose that'd be the best decision until that love sick astronaut comes to his senses."The long haired boy agreed(?),a slightly bothered tone resonating between his words. This day had been both stressful, confusing.. And beautiful of course. A human denying death and battling the lingering effects wasn't something the Anthropologist got to witness daily, but today it came at the cost of his patience and energy.

Well, his patience just fine. Energy was of short abundance.

"I agree without our history fanatic! I and the spirits wish to rest after this long day! In fact, I'll meet you all there!Bye-onara!"

And as quick as her sentence was spoken, The silver haired artist left before Kaede could tell her no. She didn't NOT like Angie but.. She was rather insistent.

"Shouldn't we go get Koki-"

"Nope. There's enough headaches in this room already, don't need another!Whatever or wherever that grape flavored condom went to isn't my concern. "

"Hmph. Funny, coming from you, Miu."Ryoma decided to retort, the inventor glaring at him before flipping him off and follow behind Angie.

----------------------

The arguing between the two wasn't really good for Anya's senses.. Like,

At all.

While Tenko had been right about Anya not belonging to anyone, the way Tenko and Kaito had been arguing kinda went against quoted statement. They'd been fighting like 2 siblings battle royaling for a teddy bear. It was humiliating and most importantly,

Annoying and headache inducing.

Anya was a coward yes but, if the ringing in their head didn't stop soon, they'd been sure about to retract back to becoming a corpse again, missed or not. When she'd been 'asleep' there was no yelling.. Sleep.

She really wanted to sleep but.. She needed to be tended too.. But,

'I'll..ill just take a nap. Yeah.

Just a... Little..

Tiny..

Nap. '

Breathing softly, Anya went noticeably limp in the astronaut's arm, her snores soft and blocked out from the Akido master's and Astronauts childish war.

"Hmmmnnn... Bunny.. Taro."

Shuichi watched in slight admiration as Kaede seemed to hold a lot of patience, even for idiots like Kaito. Shuichi wasn't one to judge others, either for their intelligence or otherwise but; it was clear Kaito hadn't been the sharpest tool in the shed.

Something uneased the already uneasy detective the moment everyone seemed to dismiss the purple-haired boy. Kokichi often tormented everyone with his honest lies and false truths, causing everyone to distrust the short boy. A part of Shuichi considered the possibility of Kokichi being the culprit, but... Was it really something he'd do? The identity of the culprit remained a secret, and that simply just didn't sit right with him.

Shuichi had yet to discuss what this meant for the killing game; Anya... surviving. Even that still contained millions of questions with no answers to; thanks to Kaito kidnapping the small girl. He hoped, despite not enjoying Monokuma's company, that the stuffed bear would at least clear up some things.

Maybe he should've just enjoyed the peace at that moment, but something in his gut wouldn't let him, and he despised it.

"Kaede." Shuichi tried catching her attention before they made their way to the dining hall too. "Don't you think it's weird that... Anya survived? I mean, the Monokuma file said she was... But I guess it's not all that reliable, huh."

He continued, "But she lost a lot of blood, and the ice, not only that but w-" Shuichi bit his tongue, realizing he may sound strange for not celebrating Anya's revival like the others. "I don't know... I may be reading too much into this." He nervously laughed, keeping all of his noisy thoughts internal.

----

“She’s dead!” Tenko paled as she suddenly caught the green-haired girl going limp in Kaito’s arms. “Oh my god! You killed her! Again!” Tenko nearly tripped over her feet as she began screaming. 

“Relax! She’s not dead, she’s just-” Kaito looked down. “Ohmygodshe’sdead!” A blood-curdling scream escaped his throat.

“You idiot! How could you!?” Tenko shouted in terror, pointing an accusing finger at Kaito.

Neither of them had thought to check her breathing; perhaps idiocy was a contagious disease.

She couldn't help but let her eyes analyze his stance, wondering what attack should be used to safely switch who had been carrying Anya; because it was quite obvious Kaito wasn't a very good suitor.

Not like Tenko was any better.

Kaito swallowed and pushed down his incoming panic attack, legs suddenly going faster in urgency, startling Tenko as he finally made his way to the dormitories. Tenko watched in panic as Kaito looked to be ready to slam through the fucking door,

so before he could get millions of glass shards all over Anya, Tenko hurriedly opened and held the door for him. Despite alarms going off in her head for serving a male — even something as simple as opening the door for him —, multiple other alarms rang out in her head too, and successfully drowned the first one out.

Tenko slapped Kaito on the arm as he raised his foot in front of Anya's dorm.

"Damn it Kaito, don't break a woman's dorm door down! That's private! Give her to me!" Tenko refused to allow this man in Anya's room, somehow dismissing the fact that Rantaro slept in Anya's room as routine.

"Why!?" Kaito countered, a muddled and slightly disgruntled expression contorting onto his face.

Tenko opened her mouth, a smug look on her face as she began listing things in her head, counting fingers.

"Okay- no, just- Fine!" Kaito begrudgingly handed her over.

"She can stay in my room!" Tenko said a little too chipper.

"Tenko, you little- Give her back!" It was ridiculous. One second they were screaming in terror about how Anya was fucking dead, and now they were tossing her back and forth like a bag of potatoes.

How respectful :)

[neo-culture-mafia]

Just Saying (P.JS) Pt. 1

For the little bean's birthday...well...not so little bean lol. I had an awesome time writing this. Great music to inspire me.

With Love,

~J.

Jisung knew he wasn't perfect. Or in fact anywhere good enough to be with someone as perfect as you. He made that clear to himself and made sure he never went across the line on most things. Yet...you got a boyfriend...and he has some thoughts about how you're treated in the relationship.

"So...since you aren't apart of the single crowd anymore...are we still going to do stuff like this?" Jisung asked while looking up at the starry night sky while you laid next to him. "Of course dummy. You're my best friend. All of the guys too." You said sitting up a little bit; Jisung subconsciously brushing the grass off of your back. "Just making sure." He sighed quietly.

"Just know that if anything were to happen to you-" "You have 21 big brothers to kick his ass." You both chorused. He laughed at how much they've drilled the thought into your mind that you don't need them to finish the sentence.

"Good job." Jisung chuckled. He just stared at the distant stars though. They probably love one another freely. He shook the thought quickly from his mind before he would get pissed off more than he was last night.

No one approved of your boyfriend Minhyuck. He wasn't a mafia member like the rest of you were. Minhyuck was a stuck up snobby kid that lived in the hills in a huge house and had people waiting on him hand and foot; every single hour of the day when he wasn't with you of course. All the boys knew they would have to pick up the pieces of your broken heart eventually. Sadly, you were thinking of fairytales...when this world wasn't a fairytale granting place to begin with.

"Jisungie. Can you please give me a ride to the ice cream shop?" You asked looking down at the lost in thought boy. He sighed, "why?" leaving his pink lips.

"Because...Minhyuck wanted to meet up." You said checking your phone again. "It's Friday, and Friday is for the family." Jisung said sitting up with his arms supporting his weight. You understood it was Family Friday, and that you haven't missed a single Friday night stargazing with Jisung since the creation of Family Friday. "...but..." was all you could muster.

"...please?..." You asked gently, knowing Jisung would give in eventually. "No. He's not family. Today is for family." Jisung shook his head, laying back down with his hands under his head.

"But I think of him as family." Was your only argument at a time like this. Well, he's not, honey. "I understand that. But there will come a time where you will probably get married and we can't stargaze together anymore." He replaced his thought with something more gentle; afraid to get you upset and pouty.

"I'll always stargaze with you, Jisung. I always have...so that's why I'm asking...just this one time, please." You said and he knew you had a point...but he was specifically told to not let you run around with that boy if you had a chance. He wanted to see you happy though -- even if it meant hurting himself.

He sighed shallowly and looked at your wishing figure illuminated by the moon and stars. Your big y/e/c eyes resembling a dog's as it's awaiting for a treat.

"Which ice cream shop?"

___________________

Jisung pulled up to the shop with you in the passenger seat. He spotted Minhyuck waiting for you outside of the shop. He was yelling in his phone. His father probably bought him the wrong pony. Jisung chuckled to himself at the thought of the other man's anger being caused by the made-up tale.

"What's funny?" You asked as you got your purse ready. "Nothing. Was thinking of a joke Mark told me earlier." He shrugged it off. You nodded and tried to open the door. Jisung stopped you by pressing the lock. "Hoodie. Now." He said and you groaned. "Jisung." You said and he just cocked an eyebrow at your sudden outburst of sass.

"I have my foot on the brake. I can just hit the gas and drive you home right now if you want...Just Saying." He said and you quickly shook your head no. You fished around in the backseat for one of the boys' hoodie's. You finally found one and brought it on your lap. You quickly pulled it over your head and realised it was one of Renjun's...that he stole from Jisung.

Minhyuck hit his wrist with his finger, signalling that you both were taking up his time. "Your boyfriend is calling for you." Jisung said and you nodded, unlocking the door and hopping out. "Call me if anything." Jisung calls and you nod as the door shut and your hand waved as a form of goodbye.

He watched you scurry over to the asshole who just gave you a half-ass side hug and went inside. You held the door open for him. "Not even decent manners. Ha." Jisung scoffed to himself in the privacy of his own car.

Why can't you just tell her that you like her?

Jisung just drove around for awhile until he got your call that you both had finished up. "Why are you sniffling so much?" Jisung questioned as he got on the highway. "It's cold you dumba*s." You giggled and he felt his heart tinge at the sound.

"Alright I'm almost there. Stay put." He said as he drove down the highway. The gas meter signalling he would need to stop and get some on the way home. He felt his pocket and groaned. Forgot it at home.

He turned down the street and was met with you standing outside of the ice cream shop...alone...hoodieless. He took a breath before he let his anger get the best of him without knowing what happened. You waddled to the car and got in. You put on the seat belt and just sat in the cool leather seats that were warming up quickly.

"Where's the hoodie?" Jisung questioned, while also looking around for the white Mercedes Benz that Minhyuck always drives around. "Oh...that." You nodded. "Yeah...that. Where is it?" He repeated the question.

"In the ice cream shop...in the trash can." You nodded, your eyes focused on the strings of your jeans. "What? Why?" Jisung yelped a little at the answer. "Minhyuck brought up a good point. I shouldn't be walking around in other boys' clothes." You stated matter-of-factly.

Jisung just didn't say anything as he put his forehead against the steering wheel. "I'm sorry. I'll buy you a new one." You said and he just hit his forehead softly with the cool material of the steering wheel.

I don't care about the fucking hoodie. "Okay."

He started driving down the road and was remembered by the gas meter. "Can I borrow a 20? I need gas to get home." Jisung said and all you could do was bite your tongue.

"I'm kinda out of money." You said and he slammed on the breaks. "WHAT." Was the only word that left his mouth. "He forgot his wallet and wanted ice cream! I paid!" You defended yourself. Jisung gripped the steering wheel hardly as his knuckled turned and opaque and stark white color.

He has his fucking wallet. He has a fucking credit card with him. He made you pay because he's using you. But you're too nice that you don't fucking see that you-oh my god. Fuck it. Whatever.

"Okay." Was all that Jisung said as he nodded and continued driving. The tension was thick as he counted the miles he was losing on the ride home, praying he had enough to get you both home.

Luckily, by some greater force -- you made it home safely and securely. He turned the car off and just sat there for a second. He looked over to see you passed out in your seat, curling up to the seat for warmth.

Jisung hopped out of the car and went to your side. He slipped his own sweatshirt off and quickly put it on you. He maneuvered you so you were resting on his back comfortingly. He walked the distance from the turn around to the house that many of the members called home.

Forgot his wallet. Makes you pay. Leaves you in the freezing cold without a dam hoodie. Makes you run on his time.

"Pathetic." Jisung mumbled to himself once the door was opened by Renjun who held a banana in one hand and his phone in the other. "Hey...you good?" Was all he asked as Jisung rolled his eyes and carried you in. "We'll talk when I come back down." Jisung said as he walked up the stairs effortlessly with you koala'd on his back for warmth.

He took you to your room. It wasn't weird for he had done it a million times -- but he changed you from your jeans into some sweatpants and just left his sweatshirt on your body. He tucked you in and walked back out and down the stairs to the kitchen where most of the Junior Forces lounged around.

"And here he is now." Renjun said throwing a banana peel away. "Hop off my back, old man." Jisung joked as he grabbed a water bottle. Chenle and Hyuck laughed at their older being harassed by the youngest.

He took a sip from his water and set it down on the counter. His good was up and he ran a hand through his hair again to get it out of his eyes. "I don't ask for this type of treatment." Renjun shook his head and Jisung laughed, throwing an arm around his hyung's sea wide shoulders.

"I'm kidding." Jisung ruffles Renjun's hair quickly and was met with swats of hands from the unflattered older.

"Yeah yeah whatever...but what was up with you a couple minutes ago?" Renjun asked and reopened an old wound. "Oh...yeah." Jisung went back to his water. "Hyung! He was in a perfectly fine mood until you talked!" Chenle said and Renjun rolled his eyes.

"Better to talk about it than internalize it, panini head." Renjun said, growing slightly angry himself. "Guys. Not now...let Jisung explain why he's upset in the first place." Jaemin reasoned out of all the chaos.

"It can't be that bad. You're probably just over analyzing the situation or problem. Just spill and we'll help." Jaemin nudged Jisung's shoulder as he grabbed a water for himself.

"Minhyuck-" and Jisung was cut off from 5 loud groans coming from the various boys spread throughout the kitchen.

Then he heard more groans echo from down the hall where the offices were located. He chuckled to himself. "Okay what did he do now?" Jeno asked as he sat on the counter next to Renjun.

"So y/n wanted to go get ice cream because Minhyuck wanted ice cream. So I drive her and give her a hoodie so she'll stay warm. I drive around for a little bit, come to get her...and she's standing outside, alone, and without the damn hoodie." Jisung explains and at least 4 other members have made their way from the offices and into the kitchen for story time. "So I stay calm and ask where the hoodie was. She said he threw it away because 'Minhyuck said it wasn't right for me to wear other boys' clothe's'." Jisung said and they all shook their heads or rolled their eyes in annoyance.

"That's not even the worst part! Okay, so I was driving around and I was running out of gas. I forgot my wallet here and needed to get us home. So after the hoodie conversation, I ask to borrow 20 dollars...just to get us home safe and sound. I ask to borrow money from y/n, already planning to pay her back when we got home. Then she goes, 'I don't have any money.' So I ask what she meant." Jisung said and everybody was at the edge of their seats.

"Guys. He made her pay because he 'forgot his wallet'." Jisung used air quotes for the highlighted purpose of the story. They all groaned and called bullshit. "Exactly." Jisung said running a hand through his hair.

"This relationship isn't gonna last long." Johnny shook his head. "Yeah. I know. We just have to be there to pick up the pieces when it all goes to hell." Jisung rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time for the night.

"So when are you gonna tell her you like her?" Jungwoo asked as he munched on some random food that the Junior Forces made.

"Why would I do that now? She's in a relationship." Jisung shrugged. "Not a healthy one." Mark butted in. "I know that. But I can't just be like, 'Hey. Leave him for me.' It wouldn't work out that good." Jisung finished his water.

Mark shrugged at the younger boys point. "I don't know. I need to talk to her soon. Something seems...fishy. Like, domestic issues fishy." Jisung shook his head. "Woah woah woah...like...he hits her?" Renjun getting off the counter, his protectiveness showing clearly. "I don't know. She's just...very uneasy about certain situations if she's put in them." Jisung said leaning on the counter with his hands supporting his weight. They stood in silence for a moment.

"I don't know. I'll talk to her soon." Jisung said excusing himself to go to bed himself. His moods were shifting too quickly today and now he was just tired.

He ascended the steps with slow movements. Passing your room, he entered his own and stripped himself of his day clothes, opting for his comfy clothes he cherished close to him.

He laid down and just looked straight up as he met the tacky glow in the dark stars you put on his ceiling. He saw the constellations you messily put up there and his heart jumped again.

________________

You sat in your bed with your knees on your chest and sheets pulled around you. It was 6 am and you couldn't sleep. You were conflicted...and out of money.

You hopped out of bed and scurried next to door. You threw open the door silently and was met with the lump of blankets that concealed your best friend. You walked over and body slammed yourself onto the blankets. A low groan was heard and there was minimal shifting in the blankets. "What time is it?" He asked not even bothering looking at the clock next to his bed. "6."

He groaned again. "Go back to your room." He whined like a little kid. "No. It's too cold." You countered back.

Like a wormhole-his blankets opened up and sucked you into the dark abyss. It was warm and dark in the blankets; making you understand why he liked sleeping so much.

He just hugged you and you both drifted off into a deep sleep again.