#and the light needs to be on bc the dark is just really conducive to daydreaming and that leads to no sleeping 🤦🏻‍♀️

[studentbyday]

whenever i feel bad about needing more rest than others (even on a good day), i just remember that albert einstein slept 10h every night and took daily naps.

SMART goals for today: (i have to keep using the acronym to remind myself to keep things achievable lol...and sometimes i still have to edit some tasks throughout the day. it's not a failure, i'm still learning what "achievable" even is.)

morning routine ✅

physio exercises ✅

finish psyc ch 3/4 from last week ✅

finish psyc ch 4/4 from last week (i am sooooo close to being done w/ this, but i'm so tired. gotta listen to my body and get ready to sleep)

finish phil reading asst for this week ✅

work on phil quiz ✅ (answered from memory but i still have to check the readings)

skincare ✅

night routine ✅

wind down for 30 mins before sleeping with the light on (e.g. spacing out/meditate/journal/yoga/dealing with the things that distracted me while studying) ✅ (i wanted to meditate for 30 mins straight - i could not. while meditating, i was constantly reminded of things i didn't do yet and thoughts i wanted to get down that i kept stopping and starting the timer bc either these things have been bothering me for a while or i thought it was an important observation and it's now well over the 30 mins of winding down that i had originally planned and i'm sleeping a little later than i had wanted to. oh well. next time, it's probably a good idea to stick to the 30 min timer and NOT stop it now that a good number of bits and bobs have been dealt with...hopefully they don't all get replaced by new ones by the end of tmr 😂)

water meter: 💧💧💧

[montypng]

new follower here, love your art so much it's filled with so much character! I saw your tag on the lovely ghoul art; so, thought I'd send an ask: I'd love to hear your thoughts on danger days! Any things at all, feel free to ramble if you want! I always love hearing others hcs/opinions/etc on the series!

HELLO this ask has been sitting in my inbox since january sorry..its mostly bc i have sooo many things 2 talk about and i wasnt sure what i wanted 2 say in this answer but whatever im just gonna ramble SO!!! U get a bunch of random hcs and maybe thematic analysis yippee!! and thank u soo much for the kind words :]

imo all the kjs have some form of body focused repetitive behavior because this is my world and i do what i want.. poison and ghoul have dermatillomania (compulsive skin picking), and kobra and jet have trich (hair pulling) maybe. I think constantly being on the run + adrenaline highs and lows would lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms for all of them and desert living leads 2 pretty shit skin (poison+kobra have at least had bad acne for sure) which is conducive to skin picking..i think the venom siblings and ghoul are bat city runaways too so the withdrawal from bli pills (+shakes and sweats) contributed to them developing bfrbs.

ghoul also gets really bad shakes and jitters from withdrawal, so when it gets so bad that they can’t work on their explosives he blasts mad gear as loud as it can from its speakers and lets himself scream all the frustration out.

also ghoul definitely has hearing loss from bomb detonation in too close proximity. tell me it would know abt proper hearing protection safety protocols with a straight face its impossible.

kobra was born w microform cleft lip, which means he has a little deformity/groove in his upper lip kind of similar to a snake’s . also he broke his nose at some point and it healed wrong so crooked nosebridge↴

both jet and kobra are prone to migraines bc of eye strain and sensitivity (jet is nearly fully blind in his right eye and both kobras eyes are extremely sensitive to light, hence the sunglasses).

sometimes when the migraines are too much they both lie down in the trans am seats together at night and close their eyes and breathe in the dark

prior to jets eye injury they were the teams best marksman, and im not sure yet how greatly that changes after they lose depth perception, but one thing i like to believe is that jet is also a great sniper (stereoscopic vision due to retinal disparity is also only effective up til about 30 meters too so he wouldnt need to rely on binocular vision for that), so maybe they focuse on that skill post-injury. how i picture their scar ↴

this is so long already but 1 last thing more in a thematic analysis vein: i need ppls opinions on the girl and her story PLEASE. she has so little agency in the canon narrative but . Where r the girlposters around here i need to hear others thoughts on her guilt complex from the fab 4s sacrifice and her running away from her own role as the protagonist of a story she never wanted 2 be part of and her blowing up the city that killed her family and whether or not that alleviated her neuroses and brought catharsis or not and her characterisation as a literal bomb and destructive force even though shes just a kid and ughhh. Linking this girl post i made a while ago w an anne carson quote that makes me crazy ANYWAYS. Talk 2 me about her. Im begging.

[konaizumi]

thoughts on whatever tf they’re doing with poktong

Okay, so what I was assuming while watching was that whoever is blackmailing tong is a swimmer (or a friend of a swimmer) and they wanted to win the competition that pok was supposed to compete in. Pok and the coach were pretty confident he would win, so the blackmailer felt the need to take pok out of the competition, so forced tong to get pok somewhere where they could grab him and beat him up. 

So initially, my prime suspect was the kid who did win who pok briefly congratulated when he explained to the coach about being sick, but upon rewatch, I had forgotten that we actually do see the face of the blackmailer and it’s sandee, so I’m back to being confused. He could maybe be a friend of the kid who won but I assume it was more personal than that since sandee is/was their friend. I honestly have no idea why sandee would blackmail him or want to hurt pok? Maybe they beat up pok because they knew tong liked him and wanted to hurt him that way? Maybe sandee isn’t the actual blackmailer and is acting as a go between? I’m not sure, I’m open to any theories.

Now, as far as tong’s role in this, I’m not totally sure. Seeing his reaction in the bookstore, I don’t think he actually knew what the blackmailer was planning to do, but he definitely suspected it was something bad which is why he was so worried.

Now for everything that happened afterward, lemme just say, what the fuck? Tong, I appreciate you trying to make amends by taking care of him, but please just leave the poor boy alone. Then he tries to be flirty with him and I think it was bc tong thought pok would like that because pok likes (liked) him, and it was just like, please read the room. I’m not trying to blame tong bc I understand he was being blackmailed with something serious and I truly do believe he didn’t know what was going to happen to pok, but boy does tong really get on my nerves.

So, Pok’s initial reaction of hatred? Totally understandable. You want to live with him? Excuse me? Now pok said it was to keep himself safe, implying tong wouldn’t help the people who beat him up again because tong would also get hurt? Which, doesn’t actually make sense for many reasons, first of which being they beat you up in a public place, they didn’t bust down the door to your house, how would living with tong stop this? Unless I misunderstood pok somehow, which totally possible, I was very confused.

Anyways, as I said, I rewatched some of their scenes for this, and boy is it just as painful to watch the second time. The whole confrontation scene is especially bad bc it confused the fuck out of me. They kept changing the tone of the fight and each of tong’s new attitudes kept making no sense. At first tong is a little timid, understandable. Then he’s angry when pok wants him to make up for it, which still understandable given pok’s very intense tone and posture. Then he turns cocky? Which feels like it didn’t really match his dialogue well because he was agreeing to find pok a dorm (and personally I think confusion at that weird request would’ve suited the scene better). Slight confusion when pok says they would both get beat, then he’s back to cockiness with a mix of flirty confrontational, which again, just seems really incongruous with the conversation they’re having. I’m sorry, this has turned into rant, let me get back on track.

I don’t understand either boys’ motives at this point. Pok said they would live together for ‘safety reasons’ but that’s pretty obviously bullshit given that it doesn’t make sense. I thought the plot was going to be pok is mad at tong, and tong slowly over time makes it up to him and wins him over and pok finally forgives him and they get together, and that would’ve been pretty solid. But now we have enemies-to-lovers plot going on given the weirdly aggressive and confrontational convo they had, but I don’t understand why pok isn’t trying to push him away. I mean, the obvious answer is that he still has a crush on tong, but I guess I just don’t see his endgame given that he could’ve asked for something else that would’ve been more conducive to starting a relationship, or at least asked him in a different way, if a relationship is in fact his goal.

Now for tong, like I said earlier, his reactions confused me. Part of it was that he was reacting to the aggressive way pok was acting, but I don’t know why he took pok’s demand that they live together as like a challenge. Up to this point he was all about trying to be nice so pok would forgive him, so his tone shift just felt weird to me.

I was lukewarm on these two boys to start with and yes, it’s because they aren’t related to the main plot or characters at all and it felt like a waste of screen time. But I was willing to overlook this because they were cute and the episode are pretty long already, so they can afford to have some random side plots. They are not cute anymore. It turned weirdly dark and it doesn’t really match the tone of the rest of the show anymore. I will keep watching their plot, if for no other reason than to clear up the confusion, but I don’t really like it anymore. And I assume this will not resolve itself this season, based on the fact that this show is supposed to be three seasons long, so it really feels like they’re just setting up this plot for next season which implies that they get more screen time next season and I won’t lie, not really looking forward to that. And I love this show, it is already near and dear to my heart, markkit is one of my favorite bl couples and I would die for wayu, but this side plot better start connecting to the larger plot if it wants to regain my interest.

I still don’t really know where their storyline is going, other than the ‘and they were roommates’ trope. I assume forced proximity will bring them into romantically/sexually charged moments, pok will eventually forgive tong, the blackmail stuff will come to light, and some event--possibly related to the blackmail--will act as a catalyst for them to confess.

So anyways, that’s my thoughts, this turned out much longer than I thought it would be, but I was kind of processing and thinking while writing, so. If anybody has thoughts, opinions, new insights, please share. I’m happy to discuss this (or anything to do with Gen Y)

[tellywoodtrash]

sanjivani 06 + 07.11.19 lbs

still cranky af coz i'm tired from yesterday and my cat won't stop screaming in my face FOR NO DISCERNIBLE REASON this morning and ughhhhhhhhhhh. so imma pay it forward and caps lock scream at these dumbasses.

———————————————————————

06.11.19

YEH INSAAN PAGAL HAI KYA, TERE KO KOIIIIIIIIIIIII AUR SOLUTION DIKHAAYI NAHI DE RAHA SIVAAYE KHUD US SE SHAADI KARNE KE!?!!?!? LIKE GOD SIDDHANT, YOU ARE SO FUCKING DUMB.

le khaap panchayat bhi peeche pad gayi hai. LORD. THIS COUNTRY IS HONESTLY THE PITS WITH ITS DUMBASS PATRIARCHAL BULLSHIT.

"main baat karunga ishani se; woh ek ladki hai, samajh jaayegi."

BC LADKI TOH MAIN BHI HOON AUR MUJHE TOH BILKUL BHI SAMAJH NAHI AA RAHA. KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA BAKCHODIIIIIIIII HAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

this dumbass is tooooooooo fucking pure for his own good. like........ itna bhi achcha nahi hona chahiye bande ko zindagi mein.

waah. iska chehra dekho. kaisi ram milaaye jodi hai bewakoofon ki.

ishani also too pure for her own good. but in a relatable sort of way, unlike that other idiot.

oh madam, tere iss seal of approval/character certificate ka kya woh achaar daalega?!!?!? usski poori zindagi jhand ho gayi hai iss chakkar mein.

ok if you've decided that this marriage is gonna work, etc. THEN STOP LOOKING AT EACH OTHER LIKE THIS.

this chick is crazy. i get you're relieved he didn’t cheat on you and shit but........  maybe decades from now you can look back and marvel on what a great, noble man you loved, but this is a weird reaction to have right now.

ok fwding this patient’s incredibly-on-the-nose-shaayari nonsense, coz i'm really pissed now.

le poora corridor ghoom phir ke phir se wapis idhar hi aa gayi. 2 minute pehle toh bada aashirwaad de rahi thi iss shaadi ko. MAKE UP YOUR MIND SIS.

ugh lo yeh bhi aa gaya.

MANHOOS.

siddhu should claim surging newlywed/paternal hormones and throw a punch or two at this asshole.

WAIT WHAT HAS THIS FUCKER SHIFTED HIS REVENGE FROM SHASHANK TO SID?!!?!?!? WHY?!!?!?!? THE FUCK IS GOING ONNNNNNNNNNNNN?????

waaaaaaah kya khush-haaal jodi hai. should be a real healthy and conducive environment to raise a kid in!

wow. EVERYONE KNOWS THE WHOLE DEAL WITH SID AND ASHA NOW. like..... there's no keeping a secret in this hospital huh. 

oh ab issko bada empathy hai bin byaahi maa-on ke saath. ROSHNI KE SAATH KYA KAAND KIYA THA BE!?!?!?! BOL! SACH BOL!!!!!!!!!!!!

ugh stupid red herring. goddddddddddd when will they reveal this raaz already!?!?

lol sid's in the (left) corner in this shot, and then disappears in this next.

snort, ishani has ZEROOOOOOOOOO of that 4 lions awareness thingy huh??? banda 4 feet peecha khada hai and she's most focused on her gale ki kharaash.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HE SURPRISED HER AND MADE HER CHOKE. HAVEN'T YOU DONE ENOUGH TO RUIN HER LIFE, DUMBASS?!!?!

"god, tum choke kar rahi ho?!?!?! JUST BREATHE."

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, WOHI TOH NAHI HO RAHA?????? YOU THINK SHE’S A WILLING PARTICIPANT IN THIS HERE EXERCISE OF NOT BEING ABLE TO PERFORM THE ESSENTIAL PROCESS OF BREATHING????? KAUN HAI YAAR YEH BEWAKOOF?!?! SHAADI KARTE TIME MEDICAL KI DEGREE RADDI MEIN BECH AAYA KYA?!?! YA HAWAN KUND MEIN PHENK DIYA AUR USSI KE PHERE LAGAAYE THE TUNEY?

lmao this is the worst, most unconvincing heimlich i have ever seen.

uh. no. this is NOT a romantic moment.

oh no. the tone shifted and it BECAME a romantic moment. fuck. just either make out or move the fuck to the two furthest corners of the elevator. THIS TENSION IS FUCKING INSANE.

oh god this boy's unrelenting sadness is killing me. it's bloody killing me. i think i might have to double my dose of antidepressants while this fucking track is on.

boss!dad is so sad and disappoint that his ship crashed and burnt so spectacularly. he’s been here since before everyone else, when ishani was manically describing her titli and abnormal heartbeat!!!!!! :’(((((((((((

lmaoooooooooooo i wish anjali was here to hear shashank giving this personal life/professional life balance ka lecture. bada mazzaaa aaata!

boss!dad ki umeedein sidIsha pe abhi bhi kaayam. saying kuch aur nahi toh dost hi bano ishani ka.

dunno if that’s such a good idea right now, dad. maybe in time, once the feelings aren’t so raw.

GOD PLEASE ISKO ISKI KHUSHIYAAN WAPIS DE DO. ISKA GHAM AUR JHELA NAHI JAATA. CHEHRA DEKHO BECHAARE KA!!!!!!!!!!! I’M THIS CLOSE TO TEARS. HE’S A GENUINELY GOOD BEAN AND DESERVES BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh ho ab inka date dekhna hoga.

juhi is like life mein kabhi kabhi go with the flow. shashank is like "kabhi kabhi kya, hamesha."

haan hamesha aise flow kar-karke hi yeh nateeja nikal aaya hai; pata nahi kitna jaane-anjaane bachche of yours are running around here at any given moment.

................... so ambiguous. is this a romantic saath or is this a platonic saath?? LIKE THE FUCK IS THE DEAL WITH YOU TWO?!!? JUST DTR ALREADY.

purest boys. love you two.

tu haraami hai. but love your face.

bleh.

lmao rahil can't muster up neil's civil graciousness towards sidAsha.

kameeeeeeeeeeeeena insaan. bohut hi bada keeda hai tu.

rahil yaaar. i love your petty ass so much. you're honestly my favt person on this godforsaken show.

"kaash yeh sapna hota."

"kaash yeh sab ek jhoot hota. kaash sab kuch pehle jaise hota. (hum) iss tarah saamne nahi, saath khade hote."

OH HO. FORESHADOWING KI YEH SAB JHOOT HI TOH HAIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YISSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!

———————————————————————

07.11.19

RISHABH I SWEAR TO GOD....... TU ITNAAAAAAAAAAA KAMEENA KYUNNNNNNNN HAIIIIIIIII????? BHAGWAN KO BHI EK DIN MOOH DIKHAANA HAI, KUCH TOH SHARAM KAR?!?!!!!!

while neil continues to make an effort, rahil continues to make no pretense of approving of sidAsha. he just wandered the fuck off, lol.

OUFF SAD BEBBIES. SO SAD THEY ARE.

grey is really this one's colour. he looks hottesttttttttt in it. it brings out his eyes/skin tone most spectacularly.

oh ab suddenly Awareness™ (*khushi kumari gupta's voice correcting me from the skies* “ACIDITY!!!!!”) jaag utha.

SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHO THE FUCK IS SETTING OFF FIREWORKS RIGHT OVER A FUCKING HOSPITAL??????? like it's no metaphor or anything, since they've been going off since even before he appeared before her.

the fluctuating of the lights is majorlyyyyyyyyy distracting. it's not just the fairy lights, but even the huge lamps behind them.... those should.... NOT be doing that.

IDIOTS. STOP LOOKING AT EACH OTHER LIKE THAT AND MAKING ME WANT TO DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

simultaneous "i love you."

wow, inappropriate but also AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH [screams till the end of time]

ugh vardhan you're such a loserrrrrrrrrr. get a goddamn life. it's diwali; shouldn't you be with your kid, instead of sitting here alone in your office in the dark?????

"i love you, ishani. i really do. bohut pyaar karta hoon main tumse."

BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH I AM DESTROYED. I AM FUCKING...... LYING ON THE FLOOR IN PIECES. THIS IS JUST SO FUCKING SAD.

"surgery mein kabhi kabhi humein ek pal mein faisla lena pad jaata hai. fayda-nuksaan, sahi-galat ke baare mein nahi soch sakte. uss ek pal mein patient ki jaan kaise bachaaye? bass ussi tarah, uss din asha aur uske bachche ki jaan bachaane ke liye, mujhe jo sahi laga maine wohi kiya. main ek doctor hoon, apne saamne ek ladki aur uske bachche ko main marte kaise dekh sakta tha???"

ugh siddhanttttttttttttttttt yaaaaaaar, TU ITNA ACHCHA KYUN HAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII?????? ZINDAGI KUCHAL KE RAKH DETI HAI TUM JAISO KO YAAR.

ok some hardcore 2000s k-soap editing happening here and taking me outta the moment.

iska naatak abhi tak khatam nahi hua.

SO VARDHAN KNOWS THAT SID IS SHASHANK'S KID???? WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT IS HAPPENING HERE???? WHY GO THIS COMPLICATED AND TWISTED ROUTE INSTEAD OF JUST EXPOSING THAT TRUTH TO EVERYONE????? SUCH CONTRIVED BS!!!!!!

GOD SIDDHANT, YOU FUCKING NEED THERAPY. THROWING YOUR WHOLEASS LIFE AWAY TO TRY AND PROTECT A RANDOM UNBORN CLUMP OF CELLS IS NOT THE WAY TO FUCKING DEAL WITH YOUR DADDY ISSUES.

THIS IS NOT HOW I WANTED YOU GETTING ON YOUR KNEES IN FRONT OF HERRRRRRRRRR BUT YES, BEG. BEGGGGGGGGG FOR FORGIVENESS YOU FUCKING DUMBASSSSSSSSS.

bitch, uske tumpar chillane se kya haasil hona hai???? poori zindagi ujaad rakhi hai tuney apne iss Benevolent Bewakoofi™ se.

PHIR I LOVE YOU BOLA. A REAL PASSIONATE ONE THIS TIME. THIS GUY IS FUCKING TRYING TO KILL ME. OF FEELZ AND SADNESS. I'M LITERALLY SO SAD RIGHT NOW.

"i'll always love you.... main..."

FUCK THIS GUY IS REALLY TRYING TO FUCKING MURDER ME MAN.

"pehle toh main pyaar karti thi, ab aur karne lagi hoon. aur yeh pyaar zaroor badhega hi."

ASLKDJSALKDJASLDKJAJD LET THEM BEEEEEE TOGETHERRRRRRRRRRRR THIS IS JUST SO FUCKING UNFAIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR *SHAKES A FIST AT THE SKY*

"kya kamaal ki niraasha phaila rakhi hai tumne sanjivani mein. tumhare maa-baap ne tumhara naam galat rakh diya, haina dr. asha?"

ugh yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar. first of all we have such few female characters here, mardon se bloody bhara pada hai show. upar se iss ek achche compelling female character ka poora ka poora satyanaaash kar diya. main kabhi maaf nahi karoongi writers ko.

blah blah zimmedaari waala gyaan aur amar prem ke vaade, while im just looking at the poor fit of namit's pants in the butt. someone tailor that shit for him. (or don’t. i find pancake butts on hot boys kinda adorable.)

"tumne usse nahi, uski achchaayi ne usse phasaaya."

badaaaaaaaaaaaaa hi kameena insaan hai tu vardhan. narak ki aag mein jalega. if ishani herself doesn't set you on fire in the sanjivani lobby first.

perhaps asha will do the honors? looks toh aise hi de rahi hai. all the best asha. that's one way you can redeem yourself in everyone’s eyes, sis.

"pehle toh main sirf aapse pyaar karti thi. ab hadh se zyaada izzat karti hoon."

lmao ishani admitting that she didn't have any khaas izzat for him earlier.

OUFF ISS PRIDE AUR PYAAR KA KYA HI KARNA HAI IF YOU'RE NOT GETTING CHUMMIS AND/OR ORGASMS OUT OF IT????? GODDDDDDDD. AB TOH ~~~PRIDE KE SAATH~~ APNA HAATH, JAGGANNATH HI HAI TUM DONO BEWAKOOFON KE LIYE, AGLE JANAM TAK.

fuck this episode is..... too much on me. i'm just hella glad that my period is over, or i would slip into a serious depressive episode over this.

but just..... LOOK AT IT. LOOK AT THE WAY HE CAN’T HELP REACHING OUT TO HOLD HER FACE, THEY BOTH KNOW IT’S INAPPROPRIATE AND ARE TRYING TO RESTRAIN THEMSELVES, BUT HE STILL CAN’T STOP TRYING TO PHYSICALLY COMFORT HER (BECAUSE TOUCH IS HIS LOVE LANGUAGE, IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN.) AND HE CAN’T COZ HE SHOULDN’T AND HE’S DYING ON THE INSIDE BECAUSE OF IT.

I AM IN LEGIT PHYSICAL PAIN FROM SADNESS RIGHT NOW.

i wanna hate asha, but i can't. coz i can really empathize and understand the desperation with which she wants to hold on to her current life, against the forces of patriarchy trying to crush her free will so brutally .

ok maybe i hate her a little, if she'll listen to this fucker and actively make sid's life hard, moreso than what has already transpired.

MAN WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM GOD I NEED ISHANI AND ANJALI TO TEAM UP AND KICK THIS ASSHOLE'S ASSSSSSSSSSS FOR MESSING WITH THEIR LIVES AND THE LIVES OF THEIR DUDES (DAD/BROTHER/BOYFRIEND) SO BADLYYYYYYYYYYY

———————————————————————

tell me sidIsha ke andar ke detectives phir jaag uthenge and will resolve this bullllllllllllshit within next weeeeeek, COZ I HONESTLY HAVE AN ANXIETY TUMMY ACHE RN.

[carterhaughs]

Desire, Duty, & Transformative Self-Love: How Revan Saved Bastila

I posted this analysis some years ago and wanted to repost it now that I have more friends into SW following me.

The thing I’ve thought most about since finishing KOTOR a few days ago (I’ve yet to play KOTOR II but I will when I get home for winter break and have access to a PC) is why Bastila turned to the Dark Side, and why she returned to the Light (or in my interpretation, the Gray, although KOTOR I doesn’t really make this clear).

In-game, there are a number of factors alluded to as being decisive in her choice - her headstrong, wilful tendencies are twice brought up by Jolee in his reasoning as to why she turned despite being strong, and I think it was also he who mentioned that Bastila exposed herself to Revan’s “dark taint” when she touched his mind. The dark influence of the Star Forge on those in its presence is mentioned too - it drove the entire race of the Rakata mad with power and jealousy, after all - and even though the connection is never made explicit, this, too, probably had some impact on Bastila as it was the facility in which she was tortured. It’s easy to think of this dark influence functioning in a way similar to that of the One Ring in the Lord of the Rings series - it preys upon one’s weaknesses, as Jolee explained Malak did upon Bastila’s.

In addition to all the nebulous yet substantive reasons given in-game, I believe a few other influential factors can reasonably be inferred from Bastila’s upbringing. It seems likely to me that Bastila was raised to be a weapon but never fully understood for whom she was meant to pull the trigger. Like all jedi-in-training, she was purposely isolated from the world she was meant to protect for much of her childhood, but I imagine her isolation was even more complete than that of other younglings and Padawan. The moment her affinity for Battle Meditation was discovered, I think she was probably further isolated from her peers in order that it might be honed as quickly and effectively as possible - she had the potential to be an extremely powerful weapon, exactly what the Republic needed in the Jedi Civil War. Bastila’s fierce strength of will probably lent itself well to the unprecedented speed with which she developed her Battle Meditation ability, and in her isolation she probably came to believe that it was the end all, be all of her existence. She was a weapon for the Republic’s use before she was anything else, and indeed, as a Jedi, there was little opportunity for her to be anything else. She was meant to live a life of non-attachment and stifled emotions, and on top of that, she was meant to serve as a tool. With no other substantive worldly connections besides her connection to the abstract good of the Republic, she likely felt very alone, and consequently based her self-worth on her ability to serve as an effective tool to the Republic. How else was she to value herself, with no other metric of human connection and no real understanding of her own self-worth beyond her efficacy as a tool?

While this would have been hard on anyone, it was especially hard on Bastila, whose capacity and need for love is singularly acute. It’s clear from her actions prior to falling to the Dark Side that she valued the connections she formed with others deeply - why else would she so willingly sacrifice herself for Revan and Carth’s sake without a second thought? How ironic that the first connection she’s ever truly allowed to have with someone is with a former Dark Lord of the Sith! It really speaks to her isolation that the only reason she is allowed to foster this bond is because of a technicality - she must probe Revan’s mind for the coordinates to the pieces of the star map to the Star Forge in order that she might, once again, serve as an effective tool for the Republic. And in the course of that mission, she can’t help but become attached to this bond, the first she’s ever been allowed to share, even though she knows of the dangers that come with valuing bonds in such a deep and abiding way. They lead to love, the form of attachment most offensive to the Jedi code, and love leads to the Dark Side (or so she has been taught). It’s not surprising that Bastila formed a Force Bond with Revan in particular - canonically, both of them have stubborn, headstrong natures conducive to an independent-minded strength of will that flies in the face of the Jedi Code.

Her lonely subconscious fed on that unorthodoxy - that potential “dark taint” that colored Revan’s memories - because in him (or her - I’m saying him simply for convenience’s sake and bc I played a dude Revan), it had unwittingly found a kindred spirit. Bastila was given to self-loathing because she could not purge herself of that unorthodoxy - that fierce, strident spirit so discouraged by the Jedi Order. I believe that the Jedi Order saw it as an inappropriate reliance on self-love and hubris, but their mistake was in assuming that a prideful spirit will inevitably meet its end in this way. Their attempt to stifle and eradicate it did nothing but suppress it instead of dealing with it in a healthy way by looking at it as a means for self-improvement and self-preservation that has its own rewards both for oneself and others. Pride can be a folly, but you cannot divorce the sense of self, no matter how disproportionate, from the quest for self-improvement. It would have been better to acknowledge Bastila’s self-love (which they only encouraged by reminding her daily that the entire Republic relied on her abilities) and teach her to deal with it in a healthy way and use it as a means to help others by way of the confidence and conviction required for effective leadership. Instead, they expected her to subjugate her fierce spirit (a spirit that likely developed at least in part as a defense mechanism when she was asked to become the only thing standing between the Republic and total annihilation) to complete humility instead of a healthy degree of self-regard that still made room for compassion.

When she was tortured by Malak, she was alone again - she’d lost the one connection in her life that she’d ever been allowed to have - her connection with Revan. Bastila was once again just a weapon - it was all she was and all that mattered. Alone and vulnerable and in constant pain, she was open to suggestion. And as she explains when you fight her at the Star Forge, the Dark Side gave her free rein to rely on the passions she’d kept so tightly coiled for so many years. In unimaginable pain, it’s no wonder that she gave in to the way her proud spirit cried out at the injustice of it all. As a weapon with no connection to anyone, what did it matter for whom she pulled the trigger? What really mattered was whether or not she was in control - that she was the one pulling it, at her whim. That she wasn’t being used and that her personhood was respected. Even if Malak, too, only saw her as a tool, one day she could surpass him. For years, she’d been denied her passions and the need for connection they’d entailed so that she could fulfil her sole purpose as the Republic’s trump card. With no connection to those the Republic sought to protect, in her despair, she could see no inherent value in their protection. She could only see the value of self-love when self-love was all she’d ever been able to develop as it was all she was allowed to have, even though it, too, was discouraged. And her upbringing had encouraged her to view the world in binaries, so she chose the Dark Side instead of some third way that harmonized her desires with her duties. She’d only ever been allowed to love the good of the Republic in the abstract and had not been allowed to witness love with a human face.

Until she met Revan. She was encouraged to connect with him, even though that connection was meant only to be instrumental to the Republic’s cause. But in forging that first connection, he gave her something to hold on to and that’s why, canonically, he is able to pull her back. He was able to find some value in the Light Side not in spite of his passions, but because of them. He was able to channel his fierce love of the world into a desire to protect it with as much compassion as he can muster, and he is living proof that she can do the same, and that non-attachment and emotional repression are nowhere near as conducive to strength against the Dark Side as well-grounded love and compassionate fervor. And it is her recognition of this as the foundation of their bond - that this is what she loves about him - that leads her to realize that she, too, can become the best version of herself by following his path because she sees herself in him. She’s openly loved by him as a person, not because she’s a potent tool. To me, it’s as if they’re two sides of the same coin (and that is likely why they were Force-Bound) - Bastila’s will to resist the Dark Side was weakened by her having lived too little within the world and too much in the abstract without anything to which she might tether herself, while Revan’s fall was linked to cynicism - to having seen too much of the world and being sickened by it (like the destruction of the Cathar homeworld by the Mandalorians that lead to his acquiring his mask) and desiring to rectify it by any means possible. They are each others’ obverse, and together they are completed by love. It’s as Jolee said - “Love doesn’t lead to the dark side. Passion can lead to rage and fear, and can be controlled… but passion is not the same thing as love. Controlling your passions while being in love… that’s what they should teach you to beware. But love itself will save you… not condemn you."

[velteris]

Something I still don't get: why is Ange's hair grey? She was blonde as a kid. Did she dye it? Is she just really stressed?

hm! i havent rly settled on an explanation myself either but theres a lil bit of evidence for everything really… just building on what u’ve already said:

1. she went grey from stressi mean… i think scientifically this has been p much debunked as an actual possible thing? but also that angst potential is. mmmhm !!!

2. she dyed itit would certainly b part of her effort to keep herself incognito while over in the royalty-hating commonwealth, but also speaking as someone who has purble hair? dyeing your hair is a Pain In The Ass. if she’s dyeing it, she must be really really good at touching up her roots (tho there’s some lovely fanfic material right there). 

there’s also the problem with her living in the spy dorms at the Farm, like they must be aware that she’s dyeing her hair, you can’t possibly keep it to yourself. i guess there’s some advantage to being able to cut it and grow your hair back out for a new Look if you need to lie low for some months. that said, it leaves a lot of traces - dyed hair over time kinda gets that chemically-meddled-with texture, the dye often leaves scent, every time you wash your hair it stains your shower/bath/towels, heck even when you’re in the act of dyeing it you often leave traces on yourself especially if you’re doing it close to the scalp. none of these r very conducive to keeping a low cover on some cases.

lastly: if she were dyeing it, she should have stopped for Operation Changeling, as part of the effort to convince her superiors that she rly could replace Princess - look how similar their hair colours are! sort of thing. 

imma still write an ange dyeing her hair tho, imma still do it

3. her hair was always meant to be grey, she was just a blonde kidi have friends who went from very blonde to brownish-blonde, and from reddish-blonde to brown, so it’s possible? anime being anime ofc no one bats an eye at a teenage girl with grey hair so it could just be Genetics™

some quic pics of the royal family; the first one is from Way Back When, n we can see that family members range between Ange/Princess-level light hair (the boy, the lady to the left) and dark hair; notably, both the Queen and the Duke seem to have lightened hair in the present. the Queen’s especially interesting bc she went from brown to blonde, not brown to grey, whereas u could say the Duke just went grey from age. but that grey’s also the exact same shade of grey Ange has.

(current Princess left, current Ange right) - u can see that Ange had hair that was slightly less… warm? so maybe, maybe, it’s part of why her hair greyed over time.

4. my improbable but angsty theory: cavorite poisoning

ok i admit im pulling this one out of my ass a bit but just think abt the Potential!! the Angst!!! the fact that they’ve explained basically nothing about the cavorite means i can do whatever i want with it!!!!!

i’ve already forgotten his name, is it eric? im just gonna use eric. eric and his sister have different hair colours. now we can b boring and just say thats genes for ya, orrr we can b extra and say that cavorite poisoning fucked up the girl’s hair too!! and i feel like, yknow, changing hair colour is probably an earlier symptom than changing eyes to glowy green, so maybe? maybe???? we can claim ange went grey from preliminary use of the handheld cavorite before they fine tuned it? zelda obvs got the final product

i know its weak but im just partial to the idea of ange being irrevocably changed by her spywork, not only in mind but also in body

[schrodinger-s-kitten]

APH rarepair week day 3: Childhood!

Pairing: Romania/Norway

Rating: T

I am really nervous bc the word childhood appears once in the story, but I think it counts? *nervous sweating*

I’m also very disappointed in myself for the ending

Idek anymore just read it

Fools

The magic community is huge. And that is an understatement. If one were to conduce a study on it, they would find out about two fifths of the global population are mages. Of course, nobody does it, because who believes in magic, right?

Lukas Bondevik lived in a tiny Norwegian town. He'd heard of famous sorcerers, but had never befriended a mage outside his family before.

Sometimes Lukas got to show off his magic to kids, who clapped and cheered, but their parents always took them away and told them ‘don't go near the strange boy’.

When Lukas was a teen, his family gathered enough money to move to England. Lukas made a small dance in the shower before their flight. They were going to live in London? Perfect! The whole plane ride, he played with strings he'd enchanted to change colour, to avoid looking out the window. He made them become various shapes, from a cat to a dragon. When they landed, he left them on the plane; someone could use them. The magic would wear off in a few days, though, and they'd become the dull grey they were before.

Everything about London was grand, even the airport. Lukas' family would have gotten lost if it weren't for the signs leading them outside. The tall ceilings giving off a spacious feeling, the chatter - or snoring, in some cases - of people, the smell of tea and coffee, it almost made him dizzy. Once they got out, he took deep, sweet breaths.

The hotel room had white walls, two bedrooms and one bathroom. Lukas and his younger brother slept in the same room. Emil fell asleep fast, but Lukas was jet-lagged and way too excited. He made little flames dance around the room, careful not to touch anything. He painted them different colours, like blue, green and purple. It was like a small show in his ceiling.

At last, he slept.

~=o=~

The sun brought light to their hotel room. Emil was up before everybody else. So, Lukas awoke not only from the aggressive sunlight, but because of his brother poking him everywhere.

“Emil. Emil, stop,” he grumbled, rolling to the other side and throwing Emil on the floor.

“The sun's already up, Lukas! Come on! You're a good wake-upper!" Shouted Emil, throwing his arms up. Lukas' hands tightened around his cover.

“Go away,” he growled.

“No! You always say it's good to wake up early and enjoy the day!”

Lukas groaned and sat up.

“All right, all right,” he sighed. “Go wake our parents.” He stood and opened the closet doors. Emil ran into their parents' room. How could someone be so energetic so early in the morning?

Oh divinities, not getting enough sleep was not worth it. Lukas chose the plainest clothes his eyes hit and put on flip-flops while brushing his hair. By the time he was ready, his parents were already up as well. Breakfast was decent, and they had a casual stroll around the city. They found a school for the kids and a good restaurant to eat in.

Emil and Lukas got into school a week later.

Nothing abnormal happened for months.

~=o=~

The lunch break bell rang. At last. Lukas put his case and notebooks into his bag and threw it over his shoulder. After waiting a few seconds for the most of people to get out, he walked out of the classroom. On the way to the cafeteria, he passed by the music room; there was Arthur, still practising on his cello, like every morning. He and Feliciano had teamed up to play a duet. Lukas stopped by and listened. It was a soft and cheerful tune, although short; fitted for the the end of summer.

Arthur's expression relaxed, and he smiled at Feliciano, who smiled right back. They put their instruments back in their cases, and talked about where they would meet next.

Someone tapped on Lukas' finger, and he turned around to see… no-one. The corridor was empty. He felt a pinch on his sides and almost yelped. Something encircled his waist and pulled him back. Lukas whirled around and hit the thing, which released him. This was an invisibility spell. Lukas spread his arm and sent fire in what he hoped was the thing's direction. A loud yelp echoed in the corridor – so the thing was afraid of fire. It also sounded human. Lukas spun around, shooting a circle of fire around himself.

By this point, Arthur and Feliciano were at the door, both shocked at the situation. Everyone was still for a second.

Arthur sighed.

“Vladimir, stop it,” he ordered. To Lukas' surprise, a voice responded.

“But- him and- the fire-”

“Vladimir.” Arthur's voice was much more stern. A groan.

“Fine.” And in the middle of the corridor, Vladimir appeared, dark red clothes, one fang showing, a tiny hat balanced on his head.

“Feliciano, are you okay?” Arthur placed a gentle hand on Feliciano's shoulder. Feliciano took deep breaths, then nodded.

“I’m… going to pretend this didn’t happen,” he said, putting his backpack on. “Let’s go, Arthur!” He grabbed Arthur’s hand, smiling, and they rushed to the cafeteria.

Vladimir and Lukas exchanged looks.

“So, where in the heck are you from?” Vladimir knitted his brow and tilted his head.

“Norway,” answered Lukas.

“Ohhh, that explains your skills!” Vladimir straightened his spine, raising his head. “I’m Vladimir Popescu, the illusionist.” He winked. “Let’s get lunch!”

Lukas blinked. That was a first. He was a little wary, but… how bad could it be? He wouldn’t have only his thoughts as company. He agreed. Vladimir grinned, and off they went to get lunch.

~=o=~

That day, they shared two classes in the afternoon. As there were no assigned seats, Lukas and Vladimir sat next to each other. The teacher was speaking while taking notes on the board.

“Now, we’ll need an example to demonstrate,” said the teacher, turning to the class. His eyes scanned the students. “Vladimir, please step up.”

Vladimir stood and walked to the front of class. Lukas looked up from his notebook and saw letters floating in the air.

Set my hair on fire.

He looked around the class; everybody else was listening to the teacher. One of Vladimir’s illusions, then. He looked back at Vladimir, and the letters had changed.

Don’t actually burn me, just set me on fire.

He nodded, and Vladimir failed to hide a grin. As the teacher explained, he concentrated on a spot in Vladimir’s hair and set it on fire. He controlled the spread, so it was slow and didn’t get out of control.

The teacher noticed it and gasped. He looked for an inexistent fire extinguisher, while Vladimir remained calm, joining hands behind his back. Some students panicked together with the teacher, others laughed, and yet others packed their bags and ran to the door in case of major disaster. As the teacher ran out to look for a fire extinguisher, Lukas turned the fire into a little snake, climbing down Vladimir’s head to his shoulder, then going down his side onto the ground. It disappeared in a small hole in the floor just as the teacher ran back into the classroom with a fire extinguisher.

There was a moment of tension as they waited for the fire to come back, but as it never did, the students flowed back into the classroom. The teacher stood a little more in shock, then sighed.

“I can’t handle this,” he groaned. “Go home. The class is over,” he then announced, walking out of the classroom to put the fire extinguisher back in its place. The students’ cheer was loud enough to hear from the gym. Most of them packed their supplies in a hurry, except Vladimir and Lukas, who were calm about the whole thing. Vladimir was trying to suppress a grin, and failing.

When they were out of the school, Vladimir burst out laughing.

“That was amazing!” he breathed out, putting his hands on his knees. “Did you see their faces? Man, you are the best!” He had to stop walking to catch his breath. Lukas allowed himself a smile.

“The idea was yours,” he replied. Vladimir’s eyebrows scrunched together and his grin faded.

“What, you never did anything like that? Nothing, you know,” he shook his arms side to side a little, “rebellious?” Lukas shook his head, and Vladimir put his hands on his hips. “Your childhood must have been boring!”

“…It was,” chuckled Lukas.

Vladimir’s expression brightened.

“Well, your adolescence’s gonna be much better!” He grabbed Lukas’ wrist. “C’mon, I know a great ice cream shop!” He tugged Lukas along to a street not far from his house. Lukas blushed at the sudden contact and protested a little, but went along with it.

The ice cream was much better than what Lukas had in his hometown. His marine blue eyes sparkled, and Vladimir was still halfway through his when Lukas had finished.

“Guess you liked the ice cream!” Laughed Vladimir. “Do you want another?”

As Lukas nodded, Vladimir bought him a new ice cream, despite Lukas’ protests that he should pay for it.

“It’s called a date, I pay for stuff.” He grinned at Lukas’ blush and stammer, and patted his head, despite being a little shorter.

After the ice cream, they strolled around with no aim. It was nice to watch the sunset, with red-leaved trees to accompany the beginning of the autumn night. They passed by a used CDs and books store, where Lukas spotted a CD from one of his favourite singers. Vladimir noticed him staring at it, and smiled.

“I have a fun idea.” Lukas looked at him with interest. “Let’s buy each other a CD and a book we find good, and then we listen to that CD and read that book!” Lukas raised an eyebrow in question. Vladimir shrugged in response. “I think we’ll know each other better after that.”

Lukas agreed. He bought Vladimir a CD with songs that told tragic stories, and a book on mythology. Vladimir bought an instrumental CD mixing electronic and orchestral, and a police fiction book. They put their new CD and book into their backpacks and walked out of the shop.

“…Don’t you have to go home?” Questioned Lukas, knitting his brow at Vladimir.

“Yea, but I’ll walk with you to your hotel first.” Vladimir put his hands beside his head. “Don’t know what could happen.”

It was a little illogical, as Lukas was a mage as well, but he didn’t argue. The sun had already set, and a few stars twinkled in the sky. Others would soon follow, but the sky was still indigo and not all the way to black.

“Do you play chess?”

“What, chess?” Vladimir shook his head with a chuckle. “I’d be out in two moves. I know how it works, though.” He raised a finger. Lukas rolled his eyes, although smirking. “Arthur plays well, if you want an opponent,” he offered. Lukas nodded in acknowledgement, and they walked in silence for a while. It was comfortable.

“Uh… where do you come from?” Asked Lukas, noticing they were nearing his house. He wanted to at least get that from Vladimir.

“Oh, a huge city in the west of Romania,” responded Vladimir, looking up. “There were a lot of mages there. Nobody from my family, though.”

“Then how did you become such a great illusionist?” Lukas blinked. Vladimir shrugged.

“I was a big fan of magicians, you know, the ones with the card tricks.” Vladimir made a vague gesture. “So I put lots of effort into magic.” He rubbed the back of his head. “Thanks for the compliment, by the way.”

“Don’t you receive them often?” Lukas’ eyes widened a little.

“Nope. People usually get annoyed at my antics,” he chuckled. “You’re one of the first to go along with them.” He stopped. “Is this your hotel?”

It was. The tall, beige building, Lukas’ room on the third floor.

“Goodbye, then,” Sighed Vladimir. “I’ll see you tomorrow on class, unless one of us is sick!” He smiled and waved as he walked away. Lukas waved back.

It had been enjoyable.

~=o=~

“Checkmate.”

The class was silent for minutes. A checkmate in twenty moves, against the smartest kid of the class. Even the teacher had to admit it was impressive.

“Thank you for the match, it was great.” Lukas smiled as he put the pieces back in the box, and stood. He walked out of the school, in the last day of class, with Vladimir and Arthur following him.

“Great game you did there!” Vladimir joke-punched him on the back.

“There's a hand imprint with some obnoxious colour, isn't there?” Sighed Lukas. Vladimir nodded, grinning. “Clean it,” he demanded. Vladimir shrugged and made the green hand imprint disappear.

Arthur chuckled beside them.

“The year has been fun, hasn't it? Since we three befriended each other.” He smiled at them. The landscape was serene, the end of a spring day. The sky was a smooth, soft gradient from lapis to yellow to pastel pink. Vladimir took a deep breath, enjoying the air.

“True. That Alfred kid even got expelled. What a great world it is!” He spread his arms beside himself and smiled at the sky. Lukas glared at him.

“You really hated him, didn't you?”

“Yep!”

“The most fun thing,” continued Arthur, smirking, “was watching you two fall in love like fools.”

The two stopped dead in their tracks, and Arthur stopped too to observe. Lukas' eyes were wide and he blushed profusely, his hand covering his mouth. Vladimir's arms fell to his side as he blinked many times. Arthur grinned.

“Goodbye, Vladimir. Goodbye, Lukas.” He waved and walked away. “I'll see you two any time you decide to visit me!”

Vladimir blinked.

“Oh, God, Lukas, I think he's right.” Vladimir shook a little. “I am in love with you.”

“I-I-” Lukas removed his hand from his mouth and  sighed. “I love you too,” he muttered, looking at the ground and blushing. Vladimir beamed and hugged him. Lukas hugged back, trying to hide his face on Vladimir's shoulder.

“Do you think we could go out?” Asked Vladimir, his voice soft. He felt Lukas nod and giggled. “I'll call you later, then.”

They held hands until they reached Lukas’ hotel.

[longforgottenunofficial]

When the Spooks Have a Midnight Jamboree

They say that whatever music you loved when you were 17, that's the music you will love the rest of your life.  For Buddy Baker, who wrote the music for the Haunted Mansion, that would be 1935.  For X. Atencio, who wrote the lyrics to "Grim Grinning Ghosts," it's 1936.  That's just an interesting factoid to keep tucked away as you read what follows. No one doubts that a big part of the Mansion's appeal is its superb musical scoring.  The "Grim Grinning Ghosts" tune, written by Buddy Baker, appears in numerous arrangements throughout the ride, and however much it's rearranged and recast, it always sounds creepy.  Magic!

The lyrics are not exactly Shakespeare.  Actually, the title is Shakespeare.  The phrase "grim grinning ghost" appears in line 933 of the epic poem, "Venus and Adonis." "Hard-favour'd tyrant, ugly, meagre, lean, Hateful divorce of love,"—thus chides she Death,— "Grim grinning ghost, earth's worm, what does thou mean To stifle beauty and to steal his breath, Who when he liv'd, his breath and beauty set Gloss on the rose, smell to the violet? Too bad it wasn't in line 999.  Whether X borrowed the phrase consciously and deliberately or plucked it from a subconscious memory of his readings in Shakespeare—who knows? Anyway, there is no point in pretending that the lyrics are poetry with a capital P.  The graveyard jamboree scene (the only place you hear the lyrics sung) is not conducive to hearing a song with any kind of narrative.  "Grim Grinning Ghosts" is calculated so that someone can hear a line here or a piece of a phrase there and still get the general idea of ghosts and ghoulies coming out to party.  Except for the tagline at the end of each verse, you could almost put the rest of the lines in a hat and reorder them at random. [Edit 8/13: But see now the argument by T. Hartwell in the Comments.]  The song is a laundry list of spooky phenomena, explained at the end of each verse as ghosts coming out to socialize.  The arrangement is suitably rollicking and undeniably catchy: Grim Grinning Ghosts [Audio Link]

Grim Grinning Ghosts When the crypt doors creak and the tombstones quake, Spooks come out for a swinging wake. Happy haunts materialize, 
 And begin to vocalize. Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize.

Now don't close your eyes and don't try to hide. Or a silly spook may sit by your side. Shrouded in a daft disguise. They pretend to terrorize. Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize.

As the moon climbs high o'er the dead oak tree, Spooks arrive for the midnight spree.
 Creepy creeps with eerie eyes, 
 Start to shriek and harmonize. 
 Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize.

When you hear the knell of a requiem bell, 
 Weird glows gleam where spirits dwell. 
 Restless bones etherialize, Rise as spooks of every size.(Laughter)

Incidentally, those singing busts have official names, which are on the blueprints and the film strips for each one (before things went digital).  Left to right you've got Rollo Rumkin, Uncle Theodore, Cousin Algernon, Ned Nub, and Phineas P. Pock.  We've already met Rollo and Phineas as tombstones in the original outside queue.  "Cousin Algernon" is the name of a character in the Oscar Wilde play, "The Importance of Being Earnest."  There was originally going to be a sixth bust, Aunt Lucretia, but they went with an all-male chorus, and Aunt Lucretia found useful employment elsewhere in the Mansion.

But let's get back to our topic.  When it comes to comic songs about ghosts and goblins coming out to party, the first one that comes to most people's minds is probably "The Monster Mash," but long before that record came out the theme was popular.  In fact, the heyday of such songs was the 1930's and 40's.  If you listen to some of those, you're probably hearing the inspirational roots that led to GGG.  Put another way, GGG is part of an established genre of novelty songs rooted in the 30's and 40's.  At times, the lyrics to some of these songs come so close that you could almost suspect direct inspiration, but there are no smoking guns that I know of.  Nevertheless, I've highlighted a few such lines in what follows.  These songs are a real kick to listen to, whatever the excuse for doing so.

The Skeleton in the Closet [Audio Link]

There's an old deserted mansion on an old forgotten road, Where the better ghosts and goblins always hang out. One night they threw a party, in a manner à la mode, And they cordially invited all the gang out. At a dark bewitching hour, when the fun was loud and hearty, A notorious wallflower became the life of the party. The spooks were having their midnight fling, The merry making was in full swing, They shrieked themselves into a cheerful trance, When the skeleton in the closet started to dance. Now a goblin giggled with fiendish glee, A shout rang out from a big banshee, Amazement was in every ghostly glance. When the skeleton in the closet started to dance. All the witches were in stitches, while his steps made rhythmic thumps, And they nearly dropped their broomsticks when he tried to do the bumps. You never heard such unearthly laughter, or such hilarious groans, When the skeleton in the closet rattled his bones.

That's Satchmo himself, of course, Louis Armstrong, from the soundtrack of the 1936 film, Pennies from Heaven.  The similarity of theme between "Skeleton" and GGG is obvious.

Swingin' at the Séance [Audio Link]

In a house up on a rock along the countryside, At precisely twelve o’clock the spooks begin to rise. Swingin’ at the seance, twelve ticks, Swingin’ at the seance, hot licks, With the medium in trance, How that horn began to dance. Swingin’ at the seance, five men, Swingin’ at the seance, jive men, When the trumpet blasted out, All the spooks began to shout. That music came through so sweetly low-down, Yet nobody knew who was riff-riff-riffin’ around. Swingin’ at the seance, black coats, Swingin’ at the seance, blue notes, While the trumpet could have won a cup, Its jivin’ broke the seance up, And who do you think was a riffin’ away? No one else but Billy May.

That's the Glenn Miller Orchestra, with Dorothy Claire, in 1941.  Looks like it may have been written by Billy May.

The Headless Horseman [Audio Link]

Now, gather ‘round while I elucidate On what happens outside when it gets late. ‘Long about midnight the ghosts and banshees Get together for their nightly jamboree. There’s ghosts with horns and saucer eyes, And some with fangs about this size. Some short and fat, some tall and thin, And some don’t even bother to wear their skin. I’m a-tellin’ you brother, it’s a frightful sight Just to see what goes on in the night.

When the spooks have a midnight jamboree, They break it up with fiendish glee. Ghosts are bad, but the one that's cursed Is the Headless Horseman, he's the worst.

When he goes a-joggin' 'cross the land, Holdin' a noggin in his hand, Demons take one look and groan, And hit the road for parts unknown.

And there's no wraith like a spook that's spurned. They don't like him, and he's really burned. He swears to the longest day he's dead, He'll show them that he can get a head.

So close all the windows, lock the doors, Unless you’re careful, he’ll get yours. Don’t think he’ll hesitate a bit, ‘Cause he’ll flip your top if it’ll fit.

And he likes them little, likes them big, Part in the middle, or a wig, Black or white or even red, The Headless Horseman needs a head.

With a hip-hip and a clippity-clop, He's out lookin' for a top to chop, So don't stop to figure out a plan, You can't reason with a headless man.

So after dark he’ll get the goods. Head home, the way that you should, ‘Cause right outside, a-waitin’ there, Is the Headless horseman.  Beware!

Now we're closer to home.  This was sung by Bing Crosby in Disney's The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (1949).  Nothing at all against Bing, but I prefer this version by Kay Starr, released only a few months after the original Crosby version.  Kay's lyrics are slightly different, as you can see, since I've printed the BC version.  When she and those background singers get to "...what goes on in the nighhhhht" you know you got your money's worth for THAT record.

The Haunted House [Audio Link]

When the doors all squeak And the windows creakAnd the ceilings leak ‘Cause the roof’s antiqueAnd you hear a shriek And your legs feel weak— It’s a haunted house

There’s a dismal moan Like a weird trombone And the old hambone Is suddenly thrown You are all alone With the great unknown In the haunted house

There’s only one good spirit, it’s the spirit in the bottle. With shaking hands you pull the cork and pour some down your throttle.

There’s a clank of chains And a smell of brains And a gory stain Where the Duke was slain And you’ve got chilblains And varicose veins In the haunted house.

When the old oak beam Feels a corpse [?], you seem To feel a wet stream With a sinister gleam And you wake with a scream From a horrible dream Of the haunted house.

When the cavalier With the dreadful leer Tried to disappear Through the chiffonier And you cling with fear To the chandelier It’s a haunted house.

The air is full of clammy claws that clutch you by the collar. So gargle night and morning just in case you have to holler.

There are lights and sprites And awful frights In flesh-pink tights But the dead of night Comes a woman in white So you’re quite all right In the haunted house.

When the old church clock Strikes twelve, there’s a knock. With a sudden shock You remember the lock On the door is a crock— Oh, why did you mock? At the haunted house.

It is black as pitch And your eyeballs twitch In the darkest niche Sits a dirty witch And the lighting switch Is out of reach In the haunted house.

When the slavey’s filled with gravy why is she so pallid? Something pushed her in the pantry when she fetched the salad.

“I’m filled with dread. Yes I’m nearly dead. I saw a head Underneath my bed. Come out if you can. I could do with a man In the haunted house.”

That's the oldest one of the bunch (almost: see below).  1931, Ray Noble and the New Mayfield Orchestra.  It's British, and there are a couple of pop culture references in there that are hard to decipher at this distance.  "Slavey" is slang for any menial servant.  What the flesh-pink tights are all about, I don't know [Edit: see comments].  The opening line is startlingly like GGG, and the structure of the song is similar: a litany of spooky phenomena with an explanatory line repeated at the end of each verse.  No partying spooks in there, however. This list could easily be extended by quite a bit.  You can buy a whole CD full of these '30s-'40s novelty ghost tunes.  But you get the idea.  "Grim Grinning Ghosts" features a contemporary arrangement (for 1969), but it feels right at home with some of these old chestnuts, don't it? Reader Melissa has directed our attention to a Gilbert and Sullivan ditty that may be the granddaddy of all these songs, and as it happens, it's a very good match to GGG in a number of ways.  The laundry list of spooky phenomena followed by an explanatory final line.  The topic?  Ghosts having a midnight jamboree.  The repeated lines at the end of each stanza explain that to us.  This is a lot like GGG.

When the Night Wind Howls by: W.S. Gilbert (1836-1911)

When the night wind howls In the chimney cowls,  And the bat in the moonlight flies And the inky clouds Like funeral shrouds, Sail over the midnight skies--

When the footpads quail At the night-bird’s wail, And black dogs bay at the moon, Then is the spectre’s holiday-- Then is the ghost’s high noon!

Ha! Ha!

Then is the ghost’s high noon! As the sob of the breeze Sweeps over the trees And the mists lie low on the fen, From grey tomb-stones Are gathered the bones

That once were women and men, And away they go, With a mop and a mow, To the revel that ends too soon, For cock crow limits our holiday-- The dead of the night’s high noon!  

Ha! Ha!

The dead of the night’s high noon! And then each ghost With his ladye-toast To their church yard beds take flight, With a kiss, perhaps, On her lantern chaps, And a grisly grim, “good night!”

Till the welcome knell Of the midnight bell Rings forth its jolliest tune, And ushers in our next high holiday-- The dead of the night’s high noon!  

Ha! Ha! 

The dead of the night’s high noon!

W. S. Gilbert (1836-1911) Taken from: Ruddigore: or, The Witch’s Curse (London: G. Bell & Sons, 1912)

We will revisit this song and go into greater detail in THIS post.

Originally Posted: Friday, August 13, 2010 Original Link: [x]