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ninjigma · 2 years

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QuinFox Week Part 6/7 - First / Previous / Next

Day 6: Sleep/Nap + Psychometry Track: 'Touch' - Sleeping At Last (Spotify / YouTube)

This time it was Quinlan’s own racing heart that woke him.

His dreams had been filled with blaster fire, flashes of his parents blending into recognized red armor. The screams of his Mother echoed around him as he picked up the broken helmet, saw his own reflection in the visor, his eyes burning yellow-

The screams became his own.

He heaved in air, awareness spreading out with the Force into the dim room in search of the threat. He had tried to sit up, felt pain flare in his abdomen and caused him to stall halfway, curling to lean on his uninsured right side.

“-nlan, focus on me. I know you recognize my voice you joke about it being familiar all the time-“

“Fox?”

He hadn’t even noticed Fox come in, or maybe he had been in the bunk next to him? He hadn’t sensed him in his panic though he had been searching for threats, which Fox definitely wasn’t. If anything Quinlan latched his focus on Fox now and felt only safety, a comfort in the strength of another.

“I’d say who else could I be but I guess there are at least a couple thousand possibilities,” Fox’s voice became sharper again, falling back on familiar humor at the sign that Quinlan was successfully anchoring himself.

Another few breaths and Quinlan managed to croak out “Lucky guess then.”

Fox snorted, standing from where he had been kneeling in front of Quinlan. Slowly he reached out, hands barely brushing Quinlan’s shoulder in a clear direction for the Jedi to lay back down, which he did with a soft groan.

“You should drink something,” the clone Commander pointed out. “Can probably eat now too if-“

“My mother. It was about my Mother.”

Fox pulled up short, half a step from turning away to grab the mentioned water and food. It was the middle of a sleep cycle, so he hadn’t been far when Quinlan’s choked scream woke him, but now he felt almost disconnected as Quinlan opened up in a very rare moment.

A moment he was sharing, though quietly, as if Fox would push it off- no. As if Quinlan was giving Fox the option to push it off, that he didn’t need to stay and listen.

But Fox had always listened before, even to things he definitely knew were ridiculous from the man before him. Why do anything different now?

At least, that was the reasoning Fox used as he returned to his spot from earlier, sitting and eyes tracking over Quinlan to check no bandages had come undone in the panic.

“Your… Mother?”

Quinlan’s head gave the shortest nod but hadn’t managed to look to Fox yet. “She was… murdered. Both of my parents were, sacrificed by my great aunt to Anzati. I was four. They gave me her medallion, the one she wears in every memory I have. And-“

At this, his eyes closed, and Fox watched the signs of Quinlan slowing to find a semblance of control and balance, something honestly quite rare for the straightforward man to do.

“And they gave it to me knowing full well I was what they described as ‘the best example of psychometry they’d ever seen’. I held the medallion and I relived their deaths like they were my own until Master Tholme found me.”

Fox blinked. He didn’t know truly what to do with any of that information. Surely he couldn’t change the past and had no similar experience of even having a parent to begin with. This wasn’t something he could fight physically or even parse out verbally. But before he could grow any more uncertain with the want to help but no path to understanding how, Quinlan continued with all the calm he shouldn’t have if Fox was to believe he was okay.

“Sorry if that is a lot. You asked about her and it’s only an explanation of why I panicked. It was long ago, and I deal with it as best I can. I’m telling you not because I think you change anything about it Fox, but just cause you asked,” dark features finally pulled away from the ceiling to land on Fox. “All you had to do was listen, which you did. So, thank you.”

Fox didn’t feel like he should be thanked. Like he hadn’t done anything to actually help, though Quinlan always made it clear that Fox didn’t ever owe him anything. Thus he found himself nodding, agreeing as best he could in the heavy silence.

Fox could be snippy, strong-headed, and fiercely loyal, pointed himself in a direction and slipped and fought his way to the end with everything he had. And though Quinlan told him thank you, Fox decided he could definitely do more than just sit here looking dumb to receive it.

He didn’t owe it to Quinlan, he wanted it for himself.

He reached out, fast before he could rethink it, and took Quinlan’s hand in his own. The Jedi didn’t even flinch, simply gave a short inhale and let his eyes flutter close. Fox had no idea how anything Jedi truly worked, but Quinlan had explained his need for gloves and how his psychometry worked before. Recalling that, he had wondered if Quinlan was strong enough to pick up memories or imagery, and decided he at least wanted to try. A chance to help Quinlan in some way even if it wasn’t with a blaster or armor.

Face scrunching up slightly in concentration and a thought of how insane this all truly sounded if he thought too long, he pictured Dex’s. He thought about how it had been one of the first places Quinlan ever convinced Fox to eat at. He even recalled some of that meeting, how excited Dex had been, how the food quickly become something Fox loved, and then how it ended with Fox dangling off a speeder while Quinlan attempted to help him and also steer with the Force.

He really did collect the insane one this time didn’t he? Maybe even give Rex a run for his money in the crazy General department.

Quinlan suddenly laughed, choked but a laugh nonetheless. So perhaps it wasn’t that insane to think that even without being able to use the Force, Quinlan could reach out and find Fox instead. Like he always seemed able to do.

“Cody is the one with the crazy General,” Quinlan murmured. “But thanks for the nomination.”

Fox thought of some of the stories Cody had told him and snorted softly as Quinlan laughed again.

“I- I can’t tell what you are thinking exactly, it is more an impression and imagery thing, and people are always complicated. But you definitely have no contradictions in the feelings of ‘you’re crazy’.”

Fox rolled his eyes, though at least he hadn’t thought of anything too embarrassing or made a mockery of holding Quinlan’s hand for no reason. “It’s because it isn’t complicated, just a fact. You are crazy.”

“Crazy about you.”

It had been said teasingly, familiar in Quinlan’s antics of flirting playfully with Fox, in which the commander would normally quip back at him. But after everything, Fox being confronted with how much hearing Quinlan say goodbye hurt, how his heart plummeted when Quinlan had collapsed so lifelessly in his arms, how every step carrying him back made him fear he may never again hear those flirting comments again, and thus never feel the resulting small flutters of hope that they could be true; after all of it, he finally put a few thoughts to his feelings. A few realizations that his priorities and wants may have shifted without him ever really noticing. Like the shadow he was, Quinlan had slipped in close and before Fox knew it he found he didn’t want to be left alone in the dark again.

In a blink, he decided he wanted Quinlan to stay with him.

“Fox?”

And in another blink, he realized his mistake.

“Sorry, I-” he pulled his hand back, every intention of moving away, under the guise of getting Quinlan or drink or maybe even an excuse to check the ship again. But he had barely let go before Quinlan’s own hand wrapped around his, anchoring the clone in place.

“No, Fox, it’s okay. You don’t have to leave,” Quinlan’s voice was low, raw in a way Fox had never heard before. “I want to stay, want you to stay, if you do too.”

Quiet. Neither of them was known for being quiet, especially not when they were together. But now it filled the small room, cushioned them both in silence that spoke louder than any words. Shifted to still and watched as they both took soft breaths.

Fox moved first.

Slowly he slid towards Quinlan, who moved the blanket back like he had been expecting it. And maybe he had with whatever Jedi nonsense Fox still scrunched his nose up about, but what was important is actually how his own stomach flipped over itself as he was now on his side, one arm naturally stretching out along the bed which Quinlan quickly accommodated, laying still on his back to not agitate his injuries.

Again they stilled, Fox’s eyes drifting over the dreadlocks splayed out across the small bit of pillow between them. Now he was close enough to pick apart the smallest scar almost hidden by Quinlan’s eyebrow, how those yellow tattoos complemented the deep color of his skin, a complexion even darker than Fox’s.

“Don’t forget to breathe, Commander.”

A joke, one that shocked a scoff out of Fox as he tried not to show how he began to consciously breathe again. “And don’t you dare irritate your wounds. I spent way too long patching them up for you to aggravate them again.”

Quinlan’s eyes had shut and left Fox the illusion of privacy even as he could watch the rise and fall of Quinlan’s bare chest. The hand that had come to rest between them looked wrong now that it was empty, and there was still that little space between them.

Fox shifted closer, fingers drifting over the back of Quinlan’s hand. The Kiffar man hummed quietly, shifted his hand above Fox’s and moved closer as well. Naturally, they tucked close together, and Fox found his nose pressed to soft locks and Quinlan's head turned slightly to ghost breath across the low hollow of Fox’s throat.

“So, you really carried me all the way back?”

Fox steadied himself in the note of humor, even if Quinlan’s own voice still had those unsure feelings hidden in it. It didn’t phase Fox, especially because of how his own emotions were still as confusing as ever and thus he focused on that familiar banter.

“Yeah, dragged your self-sacrificing Jedi ass back here and I still haven’t heard a thank you.”

“Awe, would my clone in shining armor like a kiss for his efforts?”

Fox rolled his eyes and sank a bit closer. “I think the painkillers are still affecting you, you sound delusional.”

“Not at all, Fox,” Quinlan hummed. “So much not that I may actually pass out from the pain.”

Fox tried to hide his smile. “Can’t be that bad if you didn’t say anything, di’kut.”

“You would’ve gotten up, and I didn’t want you too.” Quinlan's eyes opened lazily to glance towards their entwined fingers, smile small but bright. “Not a chance Foxie, not for anything.”

“You’re so stupid.”

“All for you Fox. A true menace or you wouldn’t like me.”

Fox felt the other man sag against him. His voice had slurred, being awake finally becoming too exhausting for him. And Fox selfishly accepted the moment, relished in the touch of someone he found he trusted explicitly for the rare seconds he would have it.

Only to realize… he didn’t have to steal the moment. Vos had gifted it to him. Was giving him the chance, the choice, the option. Told him exactly what he wanted, and gave the Fox the moment to back out or get up and leave. To keep the distance they had carefully crafted with their quips and side missions and drunk sabacc games.

Quinlan’s thumb brushed over the back of Fox’s hand.

Fox stayed.

#this one came out a tad longer then the rest #and a lot longer then intended #but it all felt too sweet to cut any shorter #could I go on forever about them?#Potentially #don't tempt my stubborn streak #foxquinweek2023 #quinlan vos #clone commander fox #quinfox #foxquin #quinlan x fox #fanart #my art #my writing

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