#and the sort of hate people spew ... especially when they think they know everything but in reality just repeat what's trendy

[momobani]

Damn i get online once in a blue moon and see heinous people still being heinous, what a shock. Truly do not want to see some of the shit that's out there but in order to enjoy things, you have to put up with the rest of it 😮‍💨

[catboymoments]

Me: Asks you to educate yourself, providing easy access to videos that, turns out, directly address the issues that make you dislike vivziepop and provide more context than tumblr and twitter hate threads ever do

You responded to that quickly I know you didn't bother watching. Bruh. I told you a lot of the hate around Vivziepop isn't valid and you don't check it out? See if any of your concerns fell under the one video I directly recommended?? The creator had timestamps too.

Going to the video would have told you the one nazi oc was from eight years ago. And it wasn't even hers! The Vivziepop drama playlist goes in depth about the updates concerning the people Vivziepop has worked with. Which SEVERAL people that worked with her came out to defend her and provide their experiences

You'd find out if you had just watched the videos, the proof, that people love to hate on Vivizie for clout and to farm likes and attention. They take screenshots out of context, go on tangents without proof, etc.

And expect you to believe them.

SO I'll do this one more time to address what specifically you said you disliked about Vivzie.

This playlist has all the videos I will talk about and more. So, if you know of any other drama and controversy surrounding Vivziepop you should probably consult that before forming your opinion: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOWIXPh0p7CzgQoUIl7rqd8oz2Ym6V9XY&si=lhDApDPhX5sWyTHA

Again, it can be found by typing into the Youtube search bar, "ayy lmao vivziepop drama"

You'll find their playlist "Vivziepop Drama Playlist" right there or even just going to the youtube channel "Ayy Lmao" and looking through the playlists.

Specifically addressing what makes you dislike Vivziepop:

The one Nazi oc, the only one to exist, is discussed in "Why everyone hates Vivziepop" at 20:07 and in "The Truth Behind Vivziepop" at 5:07 The latter has more information on that and it only takes TWO MINUTES to watch! With screenshots and proof and everything.

If you heard somewhere that there were multiple, did where you heard that have a source? To, y'know, back up the claim? If you can find it that would be lovely otherwise that is just an allegation either someone told you or you are misremembering.

The drama concerning their workplace goes mainly from the beginning of the playlist to "Vivziepop Erin Frost Drama Round 3"

Multiple artists and people that worked with Vivziepop come out in support of Vivziepop and debunk claims made by others in "Helluva boss employees debunk Vivziepop allegations (Vivziepop drama Part 4)"

I'm not sure what you are referring to when you say "the way she treats her friends" and since you haven't provided any sort of source I can only guess that you may be thinking about the ugly situation covered in "Vivziepop Spindlehorse Drama Explained"

I can already tell by the amount of people responding to the first ask I sent that you have a platform, at least a larger audience compared to the average user. If you have problems with x y and z thing about Vivziepop, provide links and proof to what concerns you in the future.

If you don't remember or can't find that proof. Watch the videos. That simple. Put it on in the background, educate yourself, before you spread any more misinformation. Please.

Then form your opinion. It's a lot and I know it is a lot but you need to know this before jumping on the bandwagon of canceling someone. Especially if you have a large audience.

Vivziepop drama and hatedom is so exhausting you wouldn't BELIEVE IT. People are constantly spewing hate without providing PROOF. THEY'RE ALLEGATIONS! Even with "proof" most are out of context and bad faith. There is a motive to lie about someone as well known as Vivziepop

I'm not asking you to like her I'm asking you to educate yourself before repeating what you've heard and provide sources to back them up.

[trashyreptilian]

TW: Body horror and unsettling faces.

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Biography (long read):

-General Info-

Full Name: Him Age: His species don't age. Instead, being adult already as they're formed. Existed since 1978. Height: 8'0'' ft Gender: Male Sex: Sexless Species: Wrath alternate ("Flawed Impersonator") Homeplace: Mandela County, Wisconsin (US) Romantic/Sexual Orientation: Panromantic Asexual

-Other Info-

Personality?: Rejected as an outcast from early on in its life, looked down by its species. He generally tries to avoid attention and interactions with other alternates. However, due to its very hostile and self-hating nature, sometimes it can't help but to get into fights. Whether they'd be caused by others, or desperately seeking out some relief from its own troubled mind. This behavior has obviously caused a bit of a reputation for how violent it is. Him's uncaring on the matter, instead reasoning that the killings are in self-defense and a sort of "justice" for all the human lives its kind have taken away. It shows far more sympathy towards humans, aware of how fragile and complex they are. Constantly fascinated by their way of living and thinking. Gained a lot of knowledge about human history and other random topics. With its closest relationship being with a human, it has a soft side as well. Although having poor management of its negative emotions, it usually represses them for his close ones. It couldn't bear to unload its burden onto someone he cares for. Him feels less shame in expressing positive feelings. By no means he's overly expressive, but he knows how to be gentle. Oftentimes displaying casual gestures of care and a willingness to spend time with a close beloved if asked.

Thinks Before Acting?: In a neutral state, sure. Sadly, that can fly right out the window once it's starting to become agitated. Blind rage can easily take a hold of it, making it impulsively lash out or spew out some truly heinous words that it may or may not regret later.

Positive Traits?: Selfless, inquisitive, caring, persistent, attentive and loyal.

Negative Traits?: Impatient, self-loathing, aggressive, over-protective, stubborn and vindictive.

Way Of Speaking?: Only speaks fluent English and with no noticeable accent in its speech. His voice is low and gravelly, and stays at a calm tone. Makes it more intimidating without even raising its voice. But when he does, it sounds more demonic with constant inhumane growling interrupting while trying to talk. (Headcanon voice: https://youtu.be/-xOzSjhK9W0?t=198)

Occupation?: Doesn't have a human profession, he'd rather steal cash and goods if absolutely needed. Neither does it have any alternate tasks, or anything else alike. Though unless, you consider being the surrogate father and only caretaker of a young adult, a job by itself. Then yes, it still has his hands full with parental responsibilities.

Powers/Skills?: Starting with his most basic skill set, which is also common within its species. At a decent level, it can mimic other people's voices with minor slip ups and defects for a certain amount of time. Has night vision and is capable of body alteration too. Sees everything in pitch black places, and fully able to contort and twist its body in freakishly vile ways. Surface adhesion is another one to mention, free to move around walls and ceilings without the risk of falling. A better advanced ability it knows is matter manipulation. What that means is that he can change his entire being into black fog-like smoke. It may reshape its size or form for certain situations. Him uses that to sneak around and enter any building it wants. Moving onto its distinct skills, which are seen amongst wrath alternates. Its physical strength is greater than many other flawed impersonators. Sometimes even surpassing some doppelgangers, depending on what sin they're made from. To add, his senses are way more overdeveloped. In this case, his sense of smell is especially heightened.

Hobbies?: Most beloved pastime is reading books, there's no topping that. Already in its first week of living, it grew a passionate fondness for human literature. Since then it's been near impossible to see it without a book in its hands. Favorite genres are history and biology, texts that explore factual knowledge are its go-to. Given the chance, it'll go on a lengthy monologue about a random topic it happened to read recently. Happens to like board games too, mostly influenced by his son. Though, it prefers simple card games as they cause less frustration. One hobby, that might be a bit unexpected from it, is teaching his cat tricks. Here's some context. If there was something to rival its love for books, it'd be felines. Whether it's big felines or tiny domesticated ones, he loves them all. An unusual fixation to say the least. It had waited long until it could get its hands on a cat. When finally given one, it quickly started to care for her. Then soon started with basic behavior training but later moved on with teaching tricks. He also likes to roam the area around its home. While it'd rather spend its time inside like a stay-at-home dad, it won't shy away from exploring places. It'll hide itself and observe from a distance if there's people or too many alternates.

Habits?: Frequently smokes, nearly every day. Sounds bad but since he's an alternate, there's no consequences. Likes the "feel" of it, and unironically loves the smell. When experiencing some kind of really bad stress or anxiety, it roughly bites its own skin. More precisely, its hands. There's been moments where he almost bit a finger off. However, the worst tendency it has is the way he handles his negative emotions. It'll often choose to bottle anything up and deal with it alone. It'll lie or change the subject when anyone brings up its issues. In return, it all creates a sort of vicious cycle where it bottles up its feelings, refuses to handle them in a healthy manner, violent conflicts ensue against random alternates to relieve itself, and then acts like nothing happened as if it's moving on.

Relationships?: As mentioned before, its closest relationship is with a human. And that, being Mark Heathcliff. Him has known them for a long time, first starting interaction when he was very young. From that point on, it took the role of a father figure and had to learn how to take care of a human child. In the early years, it was conflicted with its actions. Questioning if what it did was right. But came to terms with itself and stuck with its decision to care for a child. Interacting with a human has pretty much influenced it in the ways it thinks. While nowhere near a perfect parent, it clearly deeply loves Mark and is overprotective of them. He has given it a sense of purpose for its existence, it highly values that. They've formed a strong familial bond and friendship. Both are also secretive of this relationship, for the sake of their own safety and to not attract unwanted attention. They live together as outcasts, surviving however they can. Trying to make the best out of their lives. There's another human, Cesar Torres. Them and Mark are very close friends, eventually he had to meet Him. First encounter was terrible due to unfortunate circumstances. Saving Cesar from their own impersonator, Him wasn't seen in its friendliest state. Took a while for either of them to talk with one another. Him let Cesar approach it at his own pace and stayed dismissive whenever they happened to be in the same room. Once they actually manage to strike up a meaningful conversation, things get easier as Cesar feels more comfortable. Both strike up a friendship with their deep love for literature. Cesar couldn't help but introduce it to musicals and everything else related to theater. As time passes, getting to know each other more and sharing activities together, Cesar is seen as just another family member to Him.

Moving away from humans. Xanthan (a theraangel) was someone Him remained unaware of until Mark introduced it about them. It had no idea he was secretly talking to them. As an alternate, it had believed that angels were long extinct because of the overlord's indoctrination. First meeting went terribly to make it short. Him was skeptical towards their suggested idea of redemption. Keeping a hostile attitude, held back from getting worse by Mark's insistence to trust the stranger. Through persistent arguing, it agreed at trying the whole redemption thing but only in exchange that Xanthan would become a guardian angel for Mark. From that point on, it stays on neutral terms. Later on, they're respectful towards each other and manage to form some kind of friendship. Him admires their way of fighting and gradually grows interested in their past as an alternate. Once they grow much closer, its feelings are a bit complicated. Though, when Xanthan confesses that he fell in love with it, it gets even more confused. With Mark's help and enough time to think it through, Him reciprocates the sentiment. Experiencing a romantic bond for the first time.

Mentioning enemies. It doesn't have any trouble with humans. Alternates typically fall into this category, ones that Him has had fights with. At least the ones who happen to survive it, can actually call themselves as its enemies. No particular rivalry with anyone. Unless, you'd count Six (a doppelganger) as one. They're not really rivals though, more or less just enemies who are aware of each other's existence. Six is definitely an opposite to Him in many ways. Serving as an example of what the impersonator could have been. Lastly, Lucifer or alternate "Gabriel". Its overlord and creator. Its disobedience wasn't looked over. The way it delayed taking out its target was one thing, but what really got them were the rumors spreading around that it had begun to care for a human child. Lucifer confronted Him merely once. Making it clear that its actions were shameful and if it caused any major protest in their plans, they'd know immediately. Since then neither have come face-to-face again. Safe to say that what they had said stuck with Him. It's not actively worshiping them, no less it still fears what the overlord’s truly capable of.

Past? (Short Version): Created and took form in the depths of Hell, in the year 1978. Him, while lacking an actual name at the time like most of its kind, was made from the sin of wrath. A well-off start for an alternate, regarded as one of the more higher ranked sins amongst them. Its time in Hell was short-lived. Soon as it gained consciousness, the first face it gazed upon was none other than Lucifer, Hell's only ruler. They wasted no time at informing the new group of fresh alternates about what they were made for. The word indoctrination fitted best to describe their speeches. Besides all the many beliefs and ideas enforced on them, one detail was clearly repeated. Which was that the human species were parasites, never meant to roam the Earth. Lucifer had all the right to reclaim what was rightfully theirs. Impersonators had one important task to complete before they could do more. It had to replace a human. When the victim gained M.A.D, it'd fully copy their identity and replace them. Him's target was no one note-worthy. Seemingly a common family man with a wife and two children, a son and daughter.

It spent a lot of its time simply stalking the victim's household. Already, it was enamored with the whole concept of "family". A sort of social group with many different dynamics at play. Everything was fascinating to watch, but it paid more attention to its victim. He definitely had a protective role. Always keeping an eye out on his kids, making sure neither got hurt. Wasn't very talkative but showed affection through his actions. He especially interacted a lot with his four year old son, Mark. The children were an interesting sight for the alternate as well. Their naivety, their playfulness and openness to loving and being loved. The quality of innocence its species didn't get to have. Him couldn't help but feel as though it too needed to protect them. It didn't understand why. It wasn't created to be a parent. All the while these complicated feelings festered, it picked up on human literature. The first book it read was about parenting, found in its target's belongings. These human written texts began influencing its way of thinking and shaping its morals. One read book turned to ten, and then thirty, and so on. It mainly focused on educational books. Grabbing at whatever it could find in the house. Him hid itself in the dust-ridden attic and tried keeping itself obscured. Things remained like that for a year. However, it had noticed something had been brewing between the parents over the months. Frequent arguments would occur and they got steadily worse. Until it all boiled down to its target leaving the house in the dead of night, never to be seen again. While worried at the fact that he failed its most crucial task, it held more concern for the two children.

The mother's mental state deteriorated further when her husband left. Which sadly resulted in one of the kids being on the receiving end of her anger. For what reason, Mark was the one to be singled out while the daughter never got abused. To go back a bit, Mark and Him had interacted before a few instances. Most were accidental but others were more intended. The boy saw the alternate as an imaginary friend by then, who happened to look like his dad a little. Giving it the name “Him”. So when the father left and the abuse started, it resulted in a pivotal decision. Him could leave the broken household and perhaps try searching for its victim, or stay for Mark. No easy choice. If it did what it truly wanted, it'd be spitting at the face of its creator, and once other alternates somehow found out it'd be rejected by its own species. Despite the fear, it decided to stay. Choosing to look after Mark by itself. A few years went by seemingly fine. Fine as it could have been for them. Of course, Him had that constant paranoia about what it was doing. Whether it should embrace or reject its paternal instincts. Its worst fear was yet to realize as Hell's overlord later caught wind of what it was up to through word of gossip. One night, as Him was put to sleep by an unknown force, it was confronted by them. Disgusted with Him's actions, Lucifer threatened that if it were to get anymore involved in delaying their plans for humanity, things for it would end quickly.

The overlord's words resided within its mind, but it continued to stay as a surrogate father to Mark. Him honestly had expected to die from that encounter but it appeared as though it merely received a harsh warning. With that event and pretty much being viewed as an outcast by its own kind, it had no other choice than to make its relationship work with young Mark. Although literally being an alternate, when Mark was old enough to know that, he was unphased. Him was no perfect parent, yet it did its best to provide all the safety and support the kid needed. Constantly learning and trying to improve its parenting as Mark grew up. Not every advice it gave was good, but it had no ill intentions. Seemed as though it all paid off when Mark turned eighteen. He immediately moved out with Him to an apartment complex. Where they continue to live out their lives together in secret.

================================================

General rules for all of my FCs and OCs: -Please do not flat out steal the designs, inspiration is all good. -I am uncomfortable with my characters being unknowingly shipped with other people's characters. -Fanart is all well and great, as long as it isn't sexual. I'm fine with gore but please, keep my characters away from your own sexual material.

[anangelwhodidntfall]

Love Of My Life: Elvis Presley

Austin Butler Masterlist

word count: 1.1k

Request: How about a Elvis x Parker! Reader? Would love to see how this one is pieced together and what sort of part we play. 

taglist: @queenslandlover-93​

When Elvis first met he had to admit you were the most beautiful thing he ever laid his eyes on, he still wasn't sure you were in relation to this whole circus that came with Colonel Tom Parker, and that intrigued him. He remembers how sweet and kind and somewhat uninterested you were in everything that was going on even him, which made him like you more. You on the other hand hated working for your father and hated watching how your father dropped people when they longer benefitted him including you and your mother and one point so that's why you worked as a stagehand or something so no one would ever find out that you were related that man, which was working out great until you met the handsome man with the prettiest blue eyes you've ever seen, and found out your father was planning on managing him.

You were walking around trying to kill some time before it was time to pack up and leave for the next town when your heard someone calling your name making you turn and see Elvis jogging up to you which intrigued you.

"You mind if I join you, Darlin?" He asked looking down at you.

"Uh-sure I'm not really doing anything, just trying to kill some time before we have to leave." You said as you two started walking around.

"Fine by me, gives me a chance to get to know you better." He said to you making you sigh.

You two walked around and got to know each other and you told him about yourself and just left out who your father was until you were ready but you both found each other falling for you even more.

"So it true that you are thinking about taking on the Colonel as your manager?" You asked him.

"It is, he said that Hank Snow wants me off the tour." Elvis said basically spewing the whole thing you heard your father say his whole life.

"I know you wanna fly Elvis, but be careful especially with Colonel Snow, I've seen how he treats his clients and I would hate you for you to fall into his trap and I'm saying this as his daughter." You said leaving Elvis to stand there and think about what you said especially the part about you being the Colonel's kid.

If only he had listened to you

Elvis took on your father as his manager and that was the only reason you stuck around was to keep an eye on Elvis and try to intervene when you could without your father knowing and also finding yourself falling for Elvis even more. You had just finished helping the stage hands get set up for tomorrow's show when you saw Elvis waiting for you.

"Hi, Elvis." You said to him,

"Hi Darlin, do you have interest in seeing in possibly going for a drive with me?" He asked you.

"Sure I would love to."  You said to him.

The two of you drove around town talking, listening to music, and at parts just in silence because you each brought the other comfort, and all through the drive he kept his hand on your thigh not that you minded, and he eventually found a place to pull over so you could properly talk.

"Sweetheart, can I ask you something?" He asked you lacing his hand with yours as you nodded your head for him to continue.

"If you don't like your dad, why do you continue to stick around I'm not asking this because I want you to leave, I just hate someone as beautiful as you be miserable." He asked you.

"Because of you." You said.

"Me?" He asked you.

"Because if I left and my dad did something to hurt you I would never forgive myself. So I stay here to keep an eye on you." You said.

"Like my guardian angel?" He asked you with a smile.

"Something like that." You said noticing how close you two were and then you felt his lips on yours.

From that day forward you and Elvis became close extremely close and your father didn't like that one bit and you had caught him lying to the county people about Elvis listening to him, and you were on your way to tell Elvis when your father stopped you, and firing you. Elvis knew something was up when the Colonel came and told him that you had quit.

"I didn't quit, he fired me because I heard something I wasn't supposed to. So I'm getting my stuff and getting on the next plane to Florida and I suggest you do the same thing because he is just using you for his own gain." You said as the tears slid down your face.

"Baby I know you don't like him, but I don't think he is.... he just wants to help me." Elvis said making a sigh as you realized your father had his hooks in Elvis deep.

"Elvis baby, when you break free from my father, you can find me here and if you don't I won't be mad. I love you Elvis always have and always will." You said giving him one final kiss before climbing into your car.

Years went by before you would see him again, you missed him dearly but you were glad you finally got away from your dad even if it meant leaving the love of your life. One day you had come back from walking your dog when you would find Elvis waiting on your doorstep, god the years were so kind to him.

"Elvis?" You asked him quietly not sure if you were seeing things.

"Hi Darlin, you look good." He said as you two closed the space between you two.

"Thank you. What are you doing here?" You asked him.

"You were right all along, he was using me for his gain. So I fired him and got a new manager and then I came to find you." He said wrapping his arms around you.

"I'm glad your here. I've missed you, Elvis." You said laying your head on his chest as the tears leaked down your face.

"I've missed you more sweetheart. I'm sorry it took me so long,  but I never stopped loving you." He said pressing a kiss to your forehead.

You were happy to finally have the man you've loved since you were 17, back in your arms where he belonged and away from your dad. You prayed that you two would never have to deal with your father again and finally live your lives together.

[g0ttal0ve101]

🪩 School Dance Headcanons! 🪩

I just thought. I should elaborate on the fact that ALL my ocs go to the same school therefore would attend the dances together and I’m……at a lost for words 💀 anyway tho i’ll include @billys-bbg ‘s ocs bc shipping reasons so yea :3

Thomas

The dance king by default. like. DEFAULT. before the dance was even ANNOUNCED he was alr it. and that’s on peaking in high school….so obv all the girls want to be the dance queen, blah blah blah, ok. BUT HOW WILL THOMAS CHOOSE? (spoiler alert: murder 🥱)

He’ll lock up all the girls hot enough to go with him in one room, force them to murder each other in a certain amount of time, then whoever lasts he’ll go with!!

The final girl is SO EXCITED TO HAVE HER HANDS ON THE DANCE QUEEN POSITION!!

^ Until Thomas changes his mind and goes with Riley anyway. Indecisive people are the worst, right? :3

Anyway he wears the most expensive brands and shit to a fucking FOUR hour party…..like bro…it’s never that deep

he tries to pull riley before and after the dance but…no. she was too busy hanging out with that sam boy or whatever. BOOOORING. YAAAWNINGGG. am i right? (no)

^ bc he’s salty, he convinces everyone to vote for riley to be the dance’s queen, just to make sam pissed off. (again, spoiler alert!! IT WORKS!!)

His after party is to KILL for though. Drugs, sex, and alcohol included!!! just forget abt the missing young ladies ok?

Evelyn

SHE TAKES THIS SHIT WAY TOO SERIOUSLY.

stunning, gorgeous, beautiful, radiant, captivating, charming, elegant, striking, dashing, alluring, exquisite, lovely, mesmerizing, enchanting, irresistible, fabulous, charismatic, fashionable, incredible, incomparable, graceful, appealing, el-

Violet is sooo supportive of her…despite having to go dress shopping for eight hours straight 😻 (Evelyn couldn’t decide and her gf was passing out from the amount of beauty she witnessed 💀)

At the party though, she immediately wants to leave. She literally just showed up bc getting ready is fun n shi…

BUT SHE DID SLOW DANCE WITH HER GF BEFORE LEAVING TO GO MAKE OUT!! TRUST!!!

everyone’s honest reaction when she showed up in a limbo that she actually owned: 😦

^ she was definitely the ride for everyone to get there……..

Sam

sigh. this boy has been preparing to propose to riley since the beginning of the school year. he literally had fifty mental breakdowns beforehand just for her to say ‘uh babe obv we’re going together, you’re my bf?’

but the issue is…they both don’t know what their gonna wear. riley HATES dresses and sam is going through the horrors of gender dysphoria…HOWEVER!! THEY CONQUER THEIR FEARS AND GO SHOPPING AT THE MALL TOGETHER!!!!!! only for them to get really cute outfits that compliment each other very well. (sam sobbed when seeing riley all dressed up for the first time.)

GAAAAAH THEY DID EACH OTHER’S HAIR AND NAILS!!! THE CUTIES!!! ofc riley’s parents didnt want anything to do with the dance so sam’s mom ended up doing the photo shoot and taking them to dinner!! she lit thinks of riley as her own daughter atp…. (she is the #1 riam shipper!!)

at the party, jordan is pissed off that riley had moved on from him and tried to rub it in her face that he pulled tons of other bitches. (A.K.A. lindsey hall who sleeps with literally every single man she can get with and has 91827391927382 diseases. 😻) sam wants to brutally murder him but doesn’t want to ruin the night by causing any sort of drama, so let’s the side eyeing go and plans the murder for later.

everything is going well up until the king and queen are announced!! for some reason, riley won the queen position even though half the girls at school hated her, especially after the breakup with jordan. they knew IMMEDIATELY that thomas rigged the whole thing…….

once she’s called up there, thomas spews out some bullshit about sam to embarrass him and make him cry in front of everyone. it was all fun and games until girlie literally slapped the shit outta him in front of the entire fucking school. 💀

^ everyone was STUNNED. JAW ELONGATED. EYES BUGGING OUT. ETC. The chaperones wanted to escort both riley and sam out, but thomas told them to let it go and let them continue dancing. after convincing them of it, he had the balls to invite both of them to his after party too. asshole, am i right?

….they both end up going lmao. (alcohol 😻)

Max

he tags along with the gang ™️ even though he’s super poor and cannot afford to get any sort of outfit!!

^ ends up wearing his older brother’s clothes instead lmao.

he tries to stick with lucian for the beginning of the night, but seeing kai’s eyes shooting out daggers to ensure he knew his place…sorta scared him off……

then he tries to stick with evelyn!! but she leaves early to go make out with her gf 💀

then he tries to stick with sam!! but….something was off? how much fruit punch did he spill on himself and……did he splash it on riley too? they looked like they murdered someone or something haha!

^ wait where did that big group of girls go?

ANYWAY. it’s time to stick around thomas on the dance floor. surely nothing could go wrong, right? ….uh. did Thomas just drug that girl’s drink?

after seeing that, he called his brother to come pick him up. 💀

Lucian

*lovely dovey sigh* lucian loves school dances! he loves the lights, the food, the dancing, the music…but the same could not be said about his date. Kai DESPISES these sorta gatherings, considering he doesn’t like ANY of these motherfuckers around them. he only went since he knew lucian was excited for it and didn’t want to disappoint.

the proposal (made by our silly boy kai :3) went as follows: lucian wil u plez go to the danse with me ? i wil birng ring pops i love u (dyslexic rizz)

despite having completely different styles, their suits still complimented each other to a T. lucian wore a soft, fitting suit while his bf wore his usual spikes and combat boots he always did. everyone could recognize who they were from miles away.

KAI HAD A SEIZURE WHEN SEEING HIS BF WEARING HIS HAIR UP IN A CUTE LIL PONYTAIL. BRO WAS SPAZZING OUT ON THE FLOOR, DYING EVEN.

lucian hung out with a few other groups of friends while there, having a light hearted conversation and a good time. he always wondered why they would be quick to leave and almost look….scared? kai reassured him that it was probably nothing, knowing DAMN WELL he was scaring them off by death staring into their fucking souls.

they ate everyone up when slow dancing bc obv two idiots who have no idea what they’re doing is MUCH cuter and efficient than losers who take things seriously 🥱

whenever they got tired of walking around or dancing or whatever, kai would claim a table and let lucian sit in his lap to take a drink. (these bitches WISH they had what they had 💀)

the dance ended at 10:30 and lucian’s usual bedtime was at 9:00…..he was nearly passing out by the time they got in the car to leave. kai had to carry him to bed….

[funkymbtifiction]

About Fi:

Is it an universal thing or does it depend on the position in the stack for Fi users to need alone time to sort out what they're feeling? I believe I'm Fi/Te but I never did that. I don't experience emotional delays or ambivalence on topics/people. I always have emotional reactions and opinions in real time, though whether I'll express them on the spot or not depends on the situation. I loath crying in front of others and can count the times I did in my life (for many years I hated even crying in front of my mom during movies), so I definitely need to be alone if I can't keep tears in. But for all I have a strong sense of self and my preferences, standards and limits, I have a hard time introspecting. I embarked on this typology journey to understand myself better and work on my issues, so I do question myself at times when it comes to the real motivations behind my actions. But I seldom find answers, I come up with hypotheses, but there's no way to know which one is right. This process of soul searching is very new to me, because when it comes to my opinions or feelings it's very much an immediate thing, I seldom have to ponder on what I think either. Only if I'm ignorant on the subject, then I'll refrain from saying anything and will inform myself before expressing a stance. I'd like for people to do the same, I hate that everyone wants to have an opinion on everything when it's clear a good amount of the time they don't now what they're talking about at all. It's shameful to not know or understand something, but it is shameful to spew misinformed opinions around, it's what I think. I'm rambling now so I'll stop, but do you think I can still have Fi?

This aligns with what IFP friends have told me. They know instantly "what they feel" (if they hate this or love it or don't want to do it; because that's their filter through which all reality passes) but articulating it is way harder than just feeling it and deciding what to do about it (especially if it involves another person) takes longer.

[solomonish]

The Brothers and What You Are to Them

Do you ever wonder what it is about you that keeps your demon by your side? Not necessarily the traits you have that attracted them to you (and still do), or what they think makes you you, but the reason you’ve become so irreplaceable and imperative in their life that they don’t think they could live without you.

Nowdateables: here!

To Lucifer, you feel like stability.

Lucifer isn’t an insecure man, nor does he need someone to lean on. He doesn’t find himself overwhelmed by what the world throws at him. He is capable, and he can shoulder the responsibilities expected of him and then some, no matter what they should turn out to be.

...at least, that’s what he thinks, and that’s what he says.

But he does find himself asking you to run errands for him when he needs them done correctly. He does find himself entrusting you to keep the roof of the house connected to the rest of it if he has to go away. You are the one who knows how he likes his coffee and when it should be brought to him to power him through the rest of his work without cutting into his scant sleep time. You keep things under control when everybody seems hellbent on making sure things don’t go the way Lucifer plans, and then you’re there to kiss his forehead despite his empty protests and remind him to take care of himself, too.

Lucifer doesn’t feel like the ground is shaking beneath him, ready to topple down at the slightest breath. But if he did, he knew you’d be there to keep him from plummeting down.

To Mammon, you feel like acceptance.

Mammon is called a lot of things in his life, especially by those who are supposed to hold him dear. He’s never smart enough, never behaved enough, never trustworthy enough, never good enough. And, when he gives up and decides not to make himself sick over expectations he’ll never be able to reach, he only gets worse. To everybody else, he’s scum, and sometimes he can’t help but feel it.

You should be saying those things to him, too, with the way he can’t help but hoard your time and your affections and yes, even your things sometimes.

But you don’t. You pet his head and hold him close and give him affection. You do it even when he makes it difficult on you and tries to tell you that he doesn’t want it. He does. He needs it, even. For the first time, he feels like somebody, he feels like he reaches the expectations set up for him and that he actually has a shot to be what somebody wants.

And when you tell him that you don’t have any expectations for him, none except for him to just be himself, he believes you. And it feels so, so nice.

To Leviathan, you feel like peace.

You would think that a life spent nearly entirely in a room playing video games would be easy and peaceful enough. Saying so aloud is a surefire way to get Leviathan to snap.

Envy never allows him to know peace. His video games, manga and anime are a distraction along with a passion. At least he can fend off some of the negative energy with the knowledge that he is the biggest megafan of any number of franchises and titles. Still, despite that, despite the calming water he modeled his room after, he still feels the jealousy tearing at his inside like unstoppable tumultuous seas.

But you stop that. You are the greatest thing, and even if he isn’t sure why you’d ever consider him worthy, he can find that peace in being the one that you’d rather spend your time with and give your affections to. He makes it hard, and he knows he does - but you persist, and you cast that life raft out to him and finally, he feels like maybe he won’t drown anymore.

When he does allow himself to sit and just be the person that, for some reason, you love, his waters still and he knows what it is to really be loved.

To Satan, you feel like understanding.

Satan has had to build a wall around himself brick by brick to hide the ugliness that nobody would dare approach, that he never even asked for and never would have.

He is the king of masks. For any situation, he has about twenty that he can switch between flawlessly, keeping you on your toes and creating a labyrinth so involved nobody will ever figure it out. Well, everybody except for you.

You managed to find your way to his core, sometimes when he wanted you too and always when he didn’t. Sometimes, you figured out the riddles he laid out for you like breadcrumbs, your smile lighting up and lightening his heart so spectacularly he felt like a new person. Other times, you snuck in with a wrecking ball and made your own way to his center, leaving the walls he set up in ruins. Most of them, he isn’t sure he wants to rebuild - not if they keep you out. At the end of the day, even if it’s cheesy, even if it’s unexpected (and that bruises his ego to admit), he finds that you understand who he is so intimately, you may know him better than he knows himself.

Maybe, with your constant meddling, you invented the person he’s become, or at least helped in his formation - but, if you like him that way, that might not be such an insufferable fate.

To Asmodeus, you feel like sweetness.

The life led by someone with eyes on him all the time is ferocious.

Even for somebody who can charm anybody with a simple glance, Asmo has an equal talent for scorning those he leaves behind. For every person gushing at his Devilgram and tracking his whereabouts for an autograph or a photo, there’s someone cursing his name and spewing the worst kinds of insult that will never directly reach his ear. In his life, you take the pleasure with the pain, and you don’t complain about either or you’ll lose the only good you’ve got.

But nothing about you is so vile. You don’t chase after him just to prove that you’ve met him (even if, at first, he was a little miffed at the prospect), and you’d never say something so soul-shatteringly hateful it’d make even a demon lord cringe. You give him the kindness that doesn’t come with expectations or desire for something in return, the kind that might even come unconditionally. You make him feel like he doesn’t have to prove anything, like he’d still be the most wonderful, beautiful creature in all the realms to you even if (gasp!) everybody else turned their backs on him. There’s a sort of innocent kindness in the way you smile at him that gives him a sugar high, and he isn’t always sure of what to do with it.

Once, he was a creature made to be loved and adored, and you make him feel like there was never a time where such a privilege was ripped away from him.

To Beelzebub, you feel gentle.

Beelzebub is a big guy, and he’s a well-known athlete. People don’t look at him and think he’s fragile goods.

And he isn’t. He is his family’s defender, and he’s been through battles terrible enough they still hang over those who even know about them like storm clouds. But inside his tough exterior, the uncaring aura he accidentally portrays when all he can think about is keeping himself fed, there’s a person that craves the same affections everybody else does. Beelzebub isn’t just hungry for food - he feel empty, entirely hollow, like a void he’s worried will grow too big to be distracted and swallow everything he cares about whole. Sometimes he feels so empty he could just curl up and die.

But, whatever it is you have, it fills him up so deliciously and he’s hooked. It’s even enough for him to just know that you’re around and taken care of - that staves off the worst of it, and he suddenly doesn’t feel like a beast that will be the downfall of all he loves. You give him patience with his need to eat, you give him gentleness with your touches and your smiles, and your voice doesn’t have that exasperated edge everybody else’s does. 

He isn’t a powerhouse or a bottomless pit to you - he’s a person, and it’s more than he could ever ask for.

To Belphegor, you feel like forgiveness.

Belphegor does a lot, he is a lot, and most of it feel wrong.

If he could keep himself awake for longer, he might have enough time to dig himself into a pit of self-loathing in the way Levi does. But he just feels empty, a void broken by occasional bouts of fury, or hatred, or pain of some sort. It’s hardly an existence, so he does the bare minimum, hardly passing the threshold for living because to do so would be more than he could deal with. Hell, the only time he has to think and to do things, he spends trying to inconvenience the person who (supposedly) cares most for him or hurting others - hurting you.

God, how can you look at him like that? Like he’s somebody you can trust, like he’s somebody worth an effort when he himself doesn’t give a damn? It’s weird, it’s stupid, it’s just like you humans to do, and it can never stop. It’s too much for him to deal with, but that’s a good thing. The time he spends wrestling with your forgiveness is time spent being productive, something he’s not exactly been accused of before. And sometimes, that diligence spreads to other thins: his relationship with his brothers, his relationship with humans, his relationship with himself.

You make him want to put the work in because you make him feel like he amounts to something - and you make him feel like his mistakes haven’t completely blotted out his hopes for the future the way he used to think they did.

[gubler-me-up]

Fact Check

Request: I love all Reid don’t get me wrong but there’s just something about early seasons awkward soft and shy Reid that’s just too perfect! I love the idea of the reader always asking later on in the day if he could finish the fact ramble someone cut him off on as they were finding it interesting and him just beaming. Or him being self conscious about being lanky or smth and reader confesses how attracted they are to him and he just smiles so big and confesses right back

A/N: Thanks for the request, anon! We love an early season, awkward Reid! This was definitely a heavily (not really) researched fic for me because I had to make sure everything coming from baby Reid’s mouth was nothing less than accurate 😤 Hope it’s cute enough, fluffy enough and everything you ever wanted from this request! Enjoy!!

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!reader

Category: Fluffiest of fluffs

Content warning: None

Word count: 1.7k

-------------

It was the second day in a row where everyone was piled with paperwork to complete. You were working vigorously to complete your share by the end of the day. The last thing you wanted to worry about during the weekend was taking home case files to complete them by Monday. You looked around to see if everyone else had the same mindset as you. As you suspected everyone was nose deep in files, except for Dr. Spencer Reid.

As always he had finished early and was just sitting reading one of his many books he brought with him to work. He had his adorable reading glasses on and his long fingers were scrolling down each page as if it was nothing. Sometimes you wished you could read 20,000 words per minute so you could have some leisure time at work.

Your thoughts were interrupted and so was your gaze as you turned to look at Morgan who let out a big, exaggerated groan. You knew how much he hated paperwork out of everyone on the team. He got up and stretched to release some tension from sitting down for several hours.

“I hate paperwork,” he mumbled.

You chuckled. “Join the club.”

“You know, you wouldn’t be piled with paperwork if you didn’t procrastinate so much when it came to doing paperwork, you wouldn’t feel so scared by it,” Spencer said without looking up from his book.

Morgan scoffed. “I’m not scared by it, Reid. I just hate doing them, especially as many as we have.”

“Actually, a lot of the time procrastinators avoid the task at hand because they feel physical pain associated with said task. A great example would be someone who procrastinates tackling a mathematical or scientific equation because just thinking about it hurts them. The parts of our brain which feel pain actually-”

“And it’s time for my coffee break,” Morgan said before leaving his desk.

You looked over at Spencer and saw the excitement of spewing facts about procrastination leave his eyes. He went back to looking down at his book and continued to read. While he was telling Morgan his procrastination fact, you were intrigued. You too struggled with major procrastination.

You truly loved hearing him ramble on about random facts though. You felt more educated about a wide range of topics not even your best college professors could touch on. You always caught him after work to ask for him to finish his fact and he was always glad to tell you the rest. He looked so ecstatic every time you asked and his precious cheeks would turn a little pink. It was as if each time you asked, he didn’t expect you to.

“Psst, hey, Spence,” you whispered.

He looked up at you. “Yes?”

“Does the parietal lobe actually feel pain when we’re scared about something we’ve been procrastinating?” You asked.

“The parietal lobe is quite an expansive part. The centre of the brain controls how a person identifies objects, interpreting touch, understand spatial relationships and feeling pain. Since we have identified what we fear, that part of the brain now associates it with pain automatically. To make ourselves feel comfortable again, we naturally avoid whatever we’re procrastinating,” he explained.

You gawked at him with awe. It was quite entertaining hearing him spit facts out as if he was an audiotape of a textbook. He looked embarrassed again and began to stray his eyes away from yours to avoid your stare. To be fair you shouldn’t be staring at him with such intensity anyway.

“That was very interesting. Thank you for that, Spence,” you said as you looked away from him.

“Any time, Y/N. Glad you like them,” he said.

When he said that you could just hear the smile in his voice. You giggled silently to yourself. You were happy you could make him feel as if he had a sense of belonging when his facts weren’t needed for a case.

“Hey, Y/N. How many case files you got left?” Elle asked.

“About 20,” you said.

“23 if you’re not rounding,” Reid chimed in.

“What the doctor said,” you replied.

Elle chuckled. “Well, since you’re 23 files away from being done, would you be interested in any coffee to speed the process up?”

You let out an exaggerated sigh of relief. “Do I ever.”

“You know coffee can actually stimulate a sense of anxiety, which I don’t think would be handy right now considering you’re almost done,” Reid said.

“Oh, that’s rich coming from you, Dr. Coffee addict. Besides, in your world Y/N is almost done, but in our world she’s going to need a coffee to keep going. How do you take it?” Elle asked as she stood up.

“Two sugars with milk,” you said.

“You should try switching out milk for cream. Cream actually makes coffee stay warm longer because-”

“And I’ll be right back,” she said as she walked away.

You looked over at Spencer who went back to reading again. You were going to ask him to continue, but thought it was best to ask him after you were done your case files. If you neglected them any longer your fear of having your weekend ruined would become a reality. Unlike Morgan, you were ready to kick your fear of doing case files to the curb.

At the end of the day, you packed up your things to leave. You ended up finishing all your casework and could finally look forward to the weekend. You walked out of the bullpen towards the elevator. To your pleasant surprise Spencer was there still.

“Hey, thought you left already,” you said.

He turned his head around to look at you. He had taken his glasses off and you could see his big, hazel eyes clearly. His face was so inviting with his awkward smile and rosy cheeks. You couldn’t understand why anyone would shut down his eager fact spilling with a face like his.

“No, I, uh, decided to stick around a bit,” he said.

“Great. I just wanted to say how right you were when you said cream makes your coffee stay warm longer. My second cup was warmer way longer than my first. Why is that?” You asked.

His awkward smile turned into a beaming one. “Well, it’s because cream thickens coffee, so it slows the process of evaporation. By slowing the initial evaporation process, you avoid losing a lot of heat altogether.”

“Oh my God, I’ve been drinking coffee wrong my whole life?” You rhetorically asked.

“Actually not your entire life because according to American Academy of Pediatrics the proper age for coffee intake is 12 or older with the average intake being between 85 to 100 milligrams per day,” he said.

“It was rhetoric and sarcastic, but that is one fact I did sort of know,” you giggled.

He blushed. “Sorry.”

You pressed the elevator button. “No, it’s fine. I love hearing you tell facts, so I don’t mind.”

“Why?”

You looked at him confused. “Why what?”

“Well, I-I mean, um, no one really asks me to continue a fact,” he said.

“Well, I’m not them. I enjoy learning through you,” you assured him.

The elevator doors opened and you both walked in. You two stood fairly close to each other in an empty elevator. You looked over at Spencer, but he didn’t look at you. He was looking straight ahead, trying his best not to make eye contact with you. His face was even redder than before. You cleared your throat, but he didn’t even move his eyes over to you.

“Are you okay, Spen-”

“Out of curiosity, Y/N, do you actually enjoy talking to me?” He asked as he turned to look at you.

You nodded. “Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“Well, you just seem as if you’d rather talk to Morgan or Elle over me,” he said.

You chuckled. “Is that your profile of me, doctor? If so, it’s weak. I love nothing more than hearing your facts or informing me of something new in your world of expertise. I really like talking to you.”

He looked at you wide-eyed, almost stunned. You don’t think once in his entire life he felt as if his rambles were appreciated somewhere. You were glad you could let him know that they are and that your ear was always ready for them.

“I wouldn’t expect you to find someone like me great to be around. I ramble, I’m awkward looking and lack a bit in understanding social cues. You’re more uniformed and I just thought you’d like people in your circle to be the same way,” he said.

“Spencer, I have no idea how Gideon even got you into the field with profiling skills like yours. I think you’re amazing mentally and physically. The social cues could use some work, but everything else is darn near perfect,” you said.

A wide smile flashed on his face before he tried to hide it by pressing his lips tightly together. He looked at the floor for a few moments. You had probably broken Dr. Spencer Reid. If he had nothing to say you had messed some wiring up.

He looked back up at you. “I… I think you’re amazing as well in every way possible.”

You giggled. “Is that a fact or a guess?”

He chuckled. “Um, uh, a fact.”

The elevator doors soon opened and you both stepped out. You looked at him as you pulled out your car keys from your purse. He fully embraced his big smile as he still tried to avoid eye contact with you. At least you broke him in one area.

“How about we fact check your fact about me and go get coffee sometime. Only with cream and sugar, of course,” you said.

He looked at you and nodded. “I’d like that.”

“Great, I’ll call you,” you said as you waved him goodbye.

He waved at you as well as you both turned your backs to each other to go your respective ways. You were giddy about your future date with Spencer. Half because you thought he was an amazing individual and wanted to know him on a deeper level. Half because you wanted to know what new facts he could tell you. Either way it was going to be a grand time for both of you.

—–

MASTERLIST

[idreamtofmanderleyagain]

Hot takes about Severus Snape are a wierdly decent glimpse into how a person with progressive values analyses things. Literally every time someone talks about Snape, it’s like this tiny window into how one-dimentionally people actually think.

Recently saw a twitter post that was a fantastic example. Here’s how it goes (paraphrasing):

Person A:“Snape is POC and Queer coded, that’s why you guy’s hate him uwu lol.”

Person B: “Actually I hate him because he was mean and abusive to children under his care uwu but go off I guess lol”

Both of these takes are designed to be dramatic and/or reactionary. They each use partial truths to paint very broad strokes. These are get-em-in-one-hit quips. This is virtue signalling, if you’ll excuse that loaded phrase. Nobody had a substantial conversation, but now everyone who sees their statement knows the high ground they took.

At least a hundred other people chimed in to add their own little quippy hot takes into play, none of which add anything significant, but clearly made everyone feel very highly of themselves.

So many layers of nuance and complex analysis is completely lost in this kind of discussion. On tumblr, you get more of this kind of bullshit, but you don’t have a word count limit, so you guys just spew endless mountains of weak overblown evidence backing up your bullshit arguments, none of which was really about engaging in a real conversation anyway.

Here’s the thing about Snape.

He is a childhood domestic abuse victim. His abuser is a muggle.

He becomes a student at a magical school that takes him away from his abuser and immediately instills in him the idea that being a part of this magical world is a badge of self-worth, empowerment, and provides safety and security - provided that he keeps in line.

There is a war is being waged in that world over his right to exist (he is a half blood).

He is a marginalized person within the context of the narrative, forced to constantly be in the same living space as the children of his own oppressors who are being groomed and recruited into a hate group militia (the pureblood slytherins). They are in turn trying to do the same to him.

He is marginalized person bullied by children who are also part of his oppressor group, but who have “more liberal” leanings and aren’t direct about why he’s being targeted (the mauraders are all purebloods, Sirius, who was the worst offender, was raised in a bigoted household, the same one that produced Bellatrix.).

He had a crush on a girl who is a muggleborn, and therefore she is considered even lesser than him and carries a stigma to those who associate with her. That girl was his only real friend. In his entire life.

For both Snape and Lily, allying themselves to a pureblood clique within their own houses would be a great way of shielding themselves from a measure of the bigotry they were probably facing. There would have been obvious pressure from those cliques to disconnect with one and other.

Every other person who associates with Snape in his adulthood carries some sort of sociopolitical or workplace (or hate cult) baggage with their association. Some of them will physically harm and/or kill him if he steps out of line. He hasn’t at any point had the right environment to heal and adjust from these childhood experiences. Even his relationship with Dumbledore is charged with constant baggage, including the purebloods who almost killed him during their bullying getting a slap on the wrist, the werewolf that almost killed him as a child being placed in an authority position over new children, etc. Dumbledore is canonically manipulative no matter his good qualities, and he has literally been manipulating Snape for years in order to cultivate a necessary asset in the war.

He is a person who is not in the stable mental state necessary to be teaching children, whom has been forced to teach children. While also playing the role of double agent against the hate group militia, the one that will literally torture you for mistakes or backtalk or just for fun. The one that will torture and kill him if he makes one wrong move.

Is the math clicking yet? From all of this, it’s not difficult to see how everything shitty about Snape was cultivated for him by his environment. Snape was not given great options. Snape made amazingly awful choices, and also some amazingly difficult, courageous ones. Snape was ultimately a human who had an extremely bad life, in which his options were incredibly grim and limited.

In fact, pretty much every point people make about how shitty Snape is as a person makes 100% logical sense as something that would emerge from how he was treated. Some if it he’s kind of right about, some of it is the inevitable reality of suffering, and some of it is part of the cycle of abuse and harm.

Even Snape’s emotional obsession with Lily makes logical sense when you have the perspective that he literally has no substantial positive experiences with other human beings that we know of, and he has an extreme, soul destroying guilt complex over her death. Calling him an Incel mysoginist nice guy projects a real-world political ideology and behavior that does not really apply to the context of what happened to him and her.

Even Snape’s specific little acts of cruelty to certain students is a reflection of his own life experiences. He identifies with Neville; more specifically, he identifies his own percieved emotional weaknesses in his childhood in Neville. There’s a very sad reason there why he feels the urge to be so harsh.

Snape very clearly hates himself, in a world where everyone else hates him, too. Imagine that, for a second. Imagine total internal and external hatred, an yearning for just a little bit of true connection. For years. Imagine then also trying to save that world, even if it’s motivated by guilt. Even if nobody ever knows you did it and you expect to die a miserable death alone.

There are more elements here to consider, including the way Rowling described his looks (there may be something in there re: ugliness and swarthy stereotyping). These are just the things that stand out the most prominently to me.

J.K. Rowling is clearly also not reliable as an imparter of moral or sociopolitical philosophies. I don’t feel that her grasp of minority experiences is a solid one, considering how she picks and chooses who is acceptable and who is a threat.

All of that said, this is a logically consistent character arc. Within the context of his narrative, Snape is a marginalized person with severe PTSD and emotional instability issues who has absolutely no room available to him for self-improvement or healing, and never really has. And yes, he’s also mean, and caustic, and verbally abusive to the students. He’s also a completey miserable, lonely person.

There are elements in his character arc that mirror real world experiences quite well. If nothing else, Rowling is enough of an emotional adult to recognise these kinds of things and portray something that feels authentic.

In my opinion, it’s not appropriate to whittle all this down by comparing him directly to the real world experiences of marginalized groups - at least if you are not a part of the group you are comparing him to. There have been many individuals who have compared his arc to their own personal experiences of marginalization, and that is valid. But generally speaking, comparing a white straight dude to people who are not that can often be pretty offensive. This is not a valuable way to discuss either subject.

Also, I believe that while it’s perfectly okay to not like Snape as a character, many of the people who act like Person B are carrying Harry’s childhood POV about Snape in their hearts well into their own adulthood. And if nothing else, Rowling was attempting to say something here about how our perspectives (should) grow and change as we emotionally mature.  She doesn’t have to be a good person herself to have expressed something true about the world in this instance, and since this story is a part of our popular culture, people have a right to feel whatever way they do about this story and it’s characters.

The complexity of this particular snapshot of fictionalized marginalization, and what it reveals about the human experience, cannot be reduced down to “he’s an abuser so he’s not worth anyone’s time/you are bad for liking him.”

And to be honest, I think that it reveals a lot about many of us in progressive spaces, particularly those of us who less marginalized but very loud about our values, that we refuse to engage with these complexities in leu of totally condemning him. Particularly because a lot of the elements I listed above are indeed reflected in real world examples of people who have experienced marginalization and thus had to deal with the resulting emotional damage, an mental illness, and behavior troubles, and bad decisions. Our inability to address the full scope of this may be a good reflection of how we are handling the complexity of real world examples.

Real people are not perfect angels in their victimhood. They are just humans who are victims, and we all have the capacity to be cruel and abusive in a world where we have been given cruelty and abuse. This is just a part of existing. If you cannot sympathise with that, or at least grasp it and aknowledge it and respect the people who are emotionally drawn to a character who refects that, then you may be telling on yourself to be honest.

To be honest, this is especially true if you hate Snape but just really, really love the Mauraduers. You have a right to those feelings, but if you are moralizing this and judging others for liking Snape, you’ve confessed to something about how you’ve mentally constructed your personal values in a way I don’t think you’ve fully grasped yet.

I have a hard time imagining a mindset where a story like Snape’s does not move one to empathy and vicarious grief, if I’m honest. I feel like some people really just cannot be bothered to imagine themselves in other people’s shoes, feeling what they feel and living like they live. I struggle to trust the social politics of people who show these kinds of colors, tbh.

But maybe that’s just me.

[xxdragonwriterxx]

🔥You Are Human, And Damn It, You Are An Important One!🔥

A/N: Hey everyone! I’m back! It looks like my tags finally decided to sort themselves out so I wanted to (finally) post a new story! I’m still working on requests though, so don’t worry, those are coming soon! I just wanted to post this in the mean time while I edit those and test if my tags are really fixed on one of my originals so that any requested fics will actually be seen later should an error occur. Thank you so much for your continued support and patience, you guys are so amazing! I hope this makes up for my temporary hiatus! This one actually has a bit of a heavier tone to it but I think I’m finally happy with it! Thanks again for the support, and don’t be afraid to talk to me! Shoot me a message or just spew random bullshit and I’ll still respond 😂. Enjoy!

(Warning: themes of non-con & abuse. This is set in a brothel, but there’s nothing explicit, it’s just mentioned or implied. Just wanted to put it out there! Viewer discretion advised!)

🐉Song Recommendation: “The Gardener” By: Sarah Sparks 🐉

Word Count: ~7k

~~~

It was that time of year. The time of year that Levi hated the most. The Underground Market Festival. It was the time of year in which merchants from all around would come down to the Underground City, away from the prying eyes of the Military Police, and sell anything and everything to the nobles who weren’t exactly looking for orthodox materials. The normally filthy, mostly empty streets would be filled with members of the wealthy, dripping in jewelry, cash, and lavish clothing as they paraded around the sorry excuse for a city, boasting of their wealth and privilege as they bought enough food and luxurious goods to feed three times the number of people in the Underground while sharing none of it.

The days were starting to blur together. Levi honestly couldn’t tell if it had been a day, a week, or a month as the drugs in his system continued to work just like the brothel owners wanted them to, rendering him practically inoperative and perfect for use. His head pounded, swimming with confused thoughts. His gaze was unfocused, warped, and his whole body felt suffocatingly hot despite his lack of cover, his legs shifting as his body instinctively searched for a relief he didn’t even want. But that was exactly how they wanted him.

The sound of his door being unlocked made him look up slowly, his eyes taking a few seconds to fully focus on the man standing in the entrance of his room, a wide, malicious grin on his face. Levi couldn’t help but wrinkle his nose in disgust. The man smelled of sweat and stale alcohol, and his unkempt appearance made Levi itch, even when drugged out of his mind.

“Oh, Levi…” the man cooed, making Levi shudder. “I have another customer for you.”

Even though Levi had been through this time and time again, even though he had been trapped in his filthy room since he was caught stealing from a merchant friend of the brothel owner at age twenty, even though the drugs in his system were making his body scream for what this new customer could give him, he still couldn’t help the wave of dread that washed through him, the fear. Levi didn’t fear much, having grown up on the streets of the Underground alone since he was abandoned by Kenny at the age of ten, but this? This he was scared of.

He thought back to the wretched old man that had abandoned him as a small child and wondered what he would think of him now. Would he be disgusted? Unsurprised? Angry? Not that it mattered. Levi knew he would never see him again. But even so, his brain couldn’t help itself from going down those roads, asking questions of “what if?” no matter how many times he reminded himself that it didn’t matter. He was just some bastard thug turned whore in the Underground. Nobody was going to even remember him, let alone care about who he was or who he may be in the future.

Levi was once again brought out of his daze when the pig in the doorway moved to the side, letting a noble woman saunter into the room. She had a wicked grin on her face as she approached him, ignoring the brothel owner as he slammed the door shut behind her, giving them some privacy. She was covered in glittering jewelry, and although the dress she wore was extravagant, it was very tight fitting and low cut, barely considered decent, her large breasts one breath away from spilling out over the top. Her hair was pinned up in a lavish braided style, twisting and coiling tightly, and held together with real gold pins that Levi knew must’ve cost a fortune.

“~Well, hello sexy,” the woman purred as she approached the raven-haired man.

Levi had to force himself not to grimace, even with the effect of the drugs, when she slithered her way over his thighs, her hands reaching up to cup his face. The smell of whatever custard perfume she had on was overwhelming, making his eyes water and his throat close up. Her hands felt clammy from all of the lotions and creams she had slathered over her skin to make it look shinier, making them feel like dead fish rubbing against his cheeks.

“Well? Aren’t you going to ask my name?” The woman demanded in a sickly sweet voice, making Levi close his eyes in barely suppressed agony.

“What is your name?” Levi asked in a low voice. He felt the woman preen above him at the sound of his voice, knowing she thought his deep tone was for setting the mood rather than the effect of his despair.

“My name is Lady Clarissa! What’s your name, hmmm?”

“Levi,” He said quietly.

“Oooh, Leevviiii, I like that,” Lady Clarissa practically moaned. “Say, Levi, you were quite expensive. That must mean you're really good at what you do. I can already tell that you fulfill my personal tastes in terms of appearance, so why don’t you convince me of the rest and give me a good time. Don’t make me regret spending my good money on you. Don’t make me punish you.”

Levi gritted his teeth when she ground her hips into him, trying his hardest not to fight back. He knew it would be difficult, the drugs making his movements and mental processes much slower, but at that moment, all he wanted to do was shove her off of him. Swallowing the bile in his throat, Levi reached for her as she leaned down to force her tongue into his mouth.

It was that time of year. The time of year that (Y/N) hated the most. The Underground Market Festival. It took everything in her to avoid groaning in annoyance as the people she was expected to call her friends dragged her down into the filthy Underground City for a day of “fun”. (Y/N) would much rather be back at home, reading a book in the library, or relaxing with the horses in the barn, or secretly practicing her sword fighting skills with the guards of their estate. But her father had forced her to go when her friends had shown up at the house, begging for her to come with them. He claimed she needed to get her priorities straight and actually present herself, show the honor and pride that came with being part of the (L/N) family. (Y/N) thought there was very little honor and pride in parading their wealth around like they owned the world, especially in front of people who constantly struggled to survive on a daily basis.

(Y/N) walked slowly down the worn cobblestone streets, suppressing the urge to gag at the sight of other nobles walking around, looking and acting as if they were rulers of the walls. She barely looked at anything, only stopping to occasionally buy food when she noticed the hungry children hanging around, looking for a scrap to steal. She could tell they were wary of her, but she never stopped trying, always offering them the food in some way, even if it meant leaving it in a secluded space for them to find later.

Her friends constantly tried to get her to engage, running up to her with crystal jewelry, silk clothing, and delectable foods, attempting to entice her, only to get pushed away. (Y/N) wanted no part in any of it. Even her attire spoke volumes about how little she wanted to be there. She knew that to the people of the Underground, the dress she wore would be considered something of utmost value, but when compared to the nobles around her, she looked underdressed and plain. She wore nothing more than a subtle red dress covered with a black leather jacket, paired with black combat boots and matching gloves, no jewelry to be found except for the simple white earrings she wore in her lobes.

Her father had been less than pleased with her appearance, but stopped arguing when she announced she was leaving, the lord just happy she had at least agreed to go to the festival. She knew he was disappointed in her, annoyed that she wasn’t like the other noble ladies who loved to flaunt their luxurious lifestyles and bend to the every whim of the lords around them, looking to marry early for money and power. (Y/N) wouldn’t be surprised if the entire reason her father wanted her here was so she could possibly win over the affections of a single lord milling about, one that was rich and influential. It was for that possibility alone that (Y/N) had originally thought to wear something that made her look underdressed, having to swallow the bile that rose in her throat at the prospect of catching some snobby noble’s attention.

“Yeah, her name is (Y/N)! She’s the one right over there, I think she could use a good time.”

(Y/N)’s head snapped up when she heard her name, her eyes shooting over to where her friends were standing in a group in front of a large building. All of them were looking at her, covering their faces with their hands to hide their giggles. Dread filled her to the brim when she saw the sign in front of the building, her face paling in horror.

“That one, eh? I think we can arrange something like that,” the brothel owner said, a smug smile on his lips as he stared at her, his grin only widening as her cheeks flushed a brilliant red. “Don’t worry, I’ve got one in particular that could give you a good ride. He’s expensive since he’s my most popular, but he’s worth it.”

(Y/N) opened her mouth to argue, her cheeks on fire as her brain fought to think of something, anything to get her out of this situation. She didn’t want to fuck some random stranger for no reason, but she especially didn’t want to have sex in a brothel. She found them vulgar, repulsive, and horrible. The way they treated their “workers” was appalling. Just as the words finally reached the tip of her tongue, one of the girls she had come to the festival with cut off her impending argument.

“Damn, I’m jealous! If he’s that good I’m almost tempted to take him myself. But she needs this. She hasn’t loosened up the entire time we’ve been here and I think this might help. She’ll take him.”

The greasy man smiled and wrote her name down, happily accepting the roll of cash her friend handed him before getting up, supposedly to let the man know that he had another customer on the way. (Y/N) tried to escape when she could, but her friends rushed up and caught her before she could slip into the shadows, dragging her over to the brothel and shoving her towards an open door where the brothel owner stood, a creepy smile still plastered on his face.

“Guys! I don’t want this!” (Y/N) whispered frantically as she was dragged towards her doom.

“It doesn’t matter if you want it or not, you need it!” One of her friends said with a laugh. “Besides, you’re going to have a fun time. Don’t make us regret spending that money for you!”

(Y/N) was practically thrown into the room, stumbling as she fought to catch her balance, before the door was slammed shut behind her, the loud sound of the lock being latched reverberating around the room with the finality of a death toll. Huffing in anger, (Y/N) stood and brushed herself off, smoothing out her dress and straightening back up to her full height, fighting off the panic slithering up her spine.

A low groan of pain coming from behind her made her whirl around in surprise, her eyes landing on a shorter, pale skinned man with stunning silver eyes and raven black hair. Gods he looked pathetic. She could definitely tell he was attractive, it made sense now as to why he was a popular choice, but he looked sickly, his cheeks hollowed out, dark circles under his eyes, and a muscled yet neglected body starting to wear thin from years of hunger and constant overuse. The sight made her want to be sick. How could anybody be cruel enough to force themselves onto this obviously abused man? How could anyone willingly pay money to fuck him rather than help him?

“Um, hello,” (Y/N) said quietly. “W-What’s your name?”

The man raised an eyebrow, not used to the soft, kind, almost shy way she asked for his name. The women and occasional men he dealt with most of the time were demanding, controlling, and sadistic, knowing they paid for a man they could use, and their voices usually projected that. Yet, this woman looked as if she had been forced to do this, further supported by the way she had been nearly thrown into the room by whom he assumed was her friends.

“Levi,” he said quietly, waiting for the usual routine to start, no matter how much his gut twisted in disgust at the thought.

“Hi, Levi, I’m (Y/N).”

“(Y/N)...” Levi murmured softly, training himself to memorize it despite his swimming brain, knowing she would want him to scream it out later. Whether in pain or in pleasure, he wasn’t sure yet.

“Um…” (Y/N) was about to speak, her mind scrambling for something to say when her eye caught sight of a large bruise on his neck. Her eyes widened and suddenly started scanning his entire body, her stomach roiling more and more the longer she stared. Now that she was really paying attention, (Y/N) could see painful bites, hickeys, and splotchy bruises littering his neck, jaw, chest, and thighs. Her eyes narrowed on the long, bloody scratches running down the length of his chest and back, and she noticed blooming red patches of skin all over him that were raw and aching from being slapped hard and rough over and over again. 

He was wearing a loose pair of worn boxers as his only cover, and (Y/N) could only imagine what other horrors the thin cloth was hiding. Glancing down, she saw him shift uncomfortably, his boxers tented by his arousal. The sight made her growl in anger, knowing that to keep him going after he had already had so many customers for the day, a drug was being used to make him insatiable, forcing him past the point of pain and probably clouding his judgement and mental process as well. It made her want to go cut up the brothel owner and serve him to a pig.

Without thinking, (Y/N) rushed to him, reaching out to him, only to freeze when he flinched. She heard him curse at the involuntary movement, knowing it was his job to appear as unaffected and sexually appealing as possible, and it made her heart clench even harder, her hatred for this place and the people who ran it increasing tenfold.

Taking a deep breath, (Y/N) immediately slowed her movements, trying to appear as calm and unhurried as possible. Her gaze softened and glazed with unshed tears when he closed his eyes, his arms reaching out as he prepared for her to sit on his lap and have her way with him like she knew every other man and woman who used him did. Gritting her teeth against the fury she felt, she carefully slid her way across his thighs. She felt him force himself to relax under her as he leaned forward to let her kiss him.

When he felt nothing, and heard something click, Levi cracked open his eyes in curiosity, only to have them fly open all the way when he felt something cool and wet against his neck. Looking down at the woman in his arms, his lips parted in shock, watching in confused awe as she leaned back and soaked a small cloth in some water from a bottle, rinsing the fresh blood from the fabric. Looking to the side, he saw a small first aid kit by her feet, the container open to reveal a variety of medical tools inside.

(Y/N) leaned forward again, raising the towel to his neck to dab at his abrasions, washing them carefully, reverently, almost... lovingly. Levi opened and closed his mouth but no words came out as she continued to work on him, delicately cleaning his jaw and neck before carefully moving on to his chest. Was this some kind of strange ritual she always performed during sex? Did she just find him dirty and want to clean him up before putting her lips or her pussy on his skin? His mind was running a million miles a minute as she worked on him in silence, only pausing when he hissed quietly at the feeling of his gashes being washed.

(Y/N) frowned as she gently swiped the cloth along the red gouges in his skin. They were deep, most likely caused by the long, sharp nail extensions some ladies liked to wear, or the dull blade of a man with violent tendencies. It didn’t surprise her, a lot of the men and women who used people like this did have sadistic qualities, but it didn’t help to quell the now roaring fire in her blood, wanting nothing more than to fight against the injustice of this man.

“W-What are you doing?” Levi finally managed to ask.

“Cleaning your wounds.”

“Why? Is this some kind of-”

“Preparation? No. We aren’t going to do anything. I just want to help your injuries heal.”

Levi felt like his brain was full of static, like his mouth was stuffed with cotton. He wasn’t complaining, far from it, but he couldn’t get a reading on this woman. Why would she, a noble from the surface, want to help him, a hopeless whore from the Underground?

“Wha-”

“Before you ask what my intentions are, I’m just going to tell you that I didn’t even want to do this. I was forced to come to this festival because my father wants me to become more of a proper noble woman. But since I wasn’t too thrilled about having to be here, the people I came with thought I could use an opportunity to loosen up, and paid for me to do this with you in the hopes that I’d start having fun with them afterwards. But I have no intention of doing any of that. I hate how everyone in the Underground is treated like shit, and the last thing I want to do is take advantage of someone who obviously isn’t in control of his situation. I just want to help.”

Levi closed his mouth, all of his protests dying on his tongue. He still had questions, a lot of them, but he decided those could wait, her explanation making him feel surprisingly relaxed for someone who had trained himself to never take the word of a noble at face value. He had never met anyone like her. Even before he was forced to whore himself out, all he had ever known of nobles was their complete lack of humility and egotistical sense of self-importance. 

It was silent for a moment, but this time, the silence was more comfortable, both of them starting to relax a little as (Y/N) continued to patch him up. Levi felt himself loosen up a bit, his muscles unwinding as his hands settled on her waist, keeping her securely balanced on his lap as she worked. Pride swirled in (Y/N)’s chest as she felt his tense muscles soften, her eyes sparkling as she started to work her way towards earning his trust.

“What’s your happiest memory?” (Y/N) asked suddenly.

Levi quirked an eyebrow in suspicion, “Why should I tell you, brat?”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” (Y/N) said, shaking her head and stifling a giggle at the nickname. “I only asked because I figured we may as well talk while we do this. Not only that, I feel like you could use some happiness right now. But I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, so if you don’t want to talk to me, you don’t have to.”

Levi was silent for a minute, the cogs in his mind turning as he tried to make what he believed to be the right decision despite the fog clouding his judgement. Just as she had promised, (Y/N) waited patiently, not pressuring him to answer, or even bringing up another question. She merely sat in silence, her clear (e/c) eyes narrowed on his injuries as she worked to make him feel better.

“There was a time when I was with my friend Farlan, a few years back. We were doing a job, trying to get rid of a troublesome merchant for a client of ours when we found out the merchant had a cat. We were hiding around the corner, waiting to strike when that damn cat jumped up onto Farlan’s lap. I’m fine with cats, but that was the day we found out Farlan had some kind of allergy to them. He was trying to hold back his sneezes but finally lost control right when the merchant came around the corner, and Farlan ended up sneezing really violently in his face. That merchant got so scared he must’ve jumped at least three feet in the air, and even managed to piss himself before he took off. We still had to finish him off later, but in that moment, when Farlan was mortified and our target was running for the hills because of a cat induced sneeze, I couldn’t help but laugh a little.”

(Y/N) had paused in her work to listen to him, and couldn’t help but smile when he finished his story. Going back to work, (Y/N) didn’t ask what happened to Farlan, not wanting to drag him back down after she had finally gotten him to talk to her, about something so personal no less.

“What about you?” Levi asked.

“Hmm, I think I’d have to say when I got my horse for my birthday,” (Y/N) said. “I was never around the horses, wasn’t allowed to be in the barn because it wasn’t “proper for a lady”. But I loved them, loved seeing them on the streets when other nobles would come visit my father or when the soldiers from the Survey Corps would come back from a mission. I couldn’t stay away, so no matter how much my father tried to squash my love of them, it just wouldn’t happen. My mother eventually convinced him to let it go, and surprised me with a little chestnut filly that I named Sashay when I was about sixteen years old. Now, she’s my best friend. We’ve been through everything together, and she’s the only one who doesn’t try to force me to be something I’m not. Aside from the royal guards, I guess. They learned a long time ago to stop trying to get me to sit still and look pretty when I beat all of them in the sword fighting ring.”

Levi’s brows shot up into his hair at that, his lips parting in surprise. “You know how to sword fight?”

(Y/N) chuckled. “Yeah, not what you were expecting, huh?”

“No,” Levi said. “I’ve never heard of a noble woman who could fight, let alone with a blade. Are you any good?”

“I tend to think so, but that all depends on who I’m up against,” (Y/N) said with a cheeky smile.

For some reason, Levi couldn’t help but smile back for the first time in years. His lips felt chapped and strained from disuse, but it felt good, a light feeling flooding his chest with warmth. “You said earlier that your horse’s name is Sashay,” Levi said, suddenly changing the topic.

“Mm hm.”

“That’s weird.”

(Y/N) giggled at his bluntness, making another fluttering feeling swirl in his chest. He had never met anyone other than Farlan who saw his language as something other than rude.

“Yeah, I suppose so,” (Y/N) said. “But I named her that because she is a sassy chestnut mare. I like to imagine that if she were human, she’d be someone you wouldn’t want to mess with, someone who wouldn’t take shit from anyone, but would do so with a spicy attitude. So I named her accordingly.”

Levi huffed a laugh at her response but almost immediately regretted it when the movement of his chest caused the rough gauze at her fingertips to brush against his injuries a little harder than before, the stinging sensation making him hiss in pain.

“Sorry!” (Y/N) said, quickly retracting her hands and holding them up, waiting for him to give her the signal to continue.

“Not your fault,” Levi mumbled, motioning that it was alright for her to get back to work. “Thank you, by the way. I don’t think I said that before.”

(Y/N) shook her head. “You don’t have to thank me. I want to do this.”

Levi wanted to ask her why but remembered what she had told him at the start of this and decided to trust her word, swallowing the question and instead changing topics. “Why do you even have this? Do you always just carry a first aid kit around?”

“Only when I come to the Underground. I want to have it available for those who really need it.”

“You do know that at least half of the people down here would kill you without a second thought to get to that medicine. Or they’d kill you if they thought you were pitying them.”

“I know, but I’d like to think I can handle myself a bit more than the average person. Even so, I usually keep it hidden unless I really want or need to use it on someone, and it’s only for quick patch-ups anyway. I can’t really fix anything major.”

(Y/N) finally finished with his front and carefully slid off of his thighs, moving slowly to begin working on his back. She made sure he was okay with everything she was doing before settling herself down onto the edge of the bed behind him, her hands reaching up to start her work once more.

Levi wanted to know more about her. He felt as if he could talk to her for hours, as if he had known her for years. He wanted to know what made her laugh, what made her cry, what her vision was for the future. It was insane, so much so that Levi idly wondered if he’d fallen off the deep end. But he couldn’t deny it. She was just too intriguing, so surprisingly kind, so genuine.

What was your childhood like? What are your favorite things to do? Do you come down here often? When will I see you again?

The questions continued to rattle around in Levi’s head as they once again lapsed into a comfortable silence but he forced all of them back, not wanting to seem either too desperate to get to know her, or be seen as coming on too strong.

After debating with himself for a while, Levi finally settled on, “You’ve mentioned your father a lot, and how he doesn’t want you to be yourself.”

(Y/N) tensed a little, her face twisted in a grimace behind Levi’s back. “Yeah… he used to be better about it, but ever since my mother died, he’s been like a tyrant. He’s upset he didn’t get a son in the first place, but now that he’s stuck with me for a daughter, he’s even more disappointed that I’m not someone he can easily make profits off of by marrying me off to someone. Not only have I been adamant about not allowing it, but no nobleman wants a woman who can think for herself. A woman who can ride a horse, go toe to toe with her soldiers, has an opinion, and is knowledgeable about current conflicts. They want someone who will dress up all pretty for them and be in bed, ready to satisfy them when they get home from gambling and drinking all day while sitting on their parents’ money.”

Levi scoffed and (Y/N) huffed in agreement. “I’m just not that kind of person. Every suitor that has ever met me has run away from my casual attire and sailor’s mouth.”

“Your father wasn’t like this when your mother was alive?” Levi asked.

“He was, but he wasn’t as bad. My parents were in an arranged marriage, but they got along alright. At least my father loved my mother enough to listen to her most of the time when she told him to lay off of me. I honestly think she’s the reason why I have such a strong fighting spirit.”

“I’m sorry she’s gone,” Levi said awkwardly, not used to providing words of comfort.

“Thanks,” (Y/N) said genuinely, a warm smile gracing her beautiful features.

“I didn’t know my mother that well,” Levi said haltingly, still unsure why he felt comfortable telling her about things he hadn’t even talked to Farlan about. “She died of a disease when I was four years old. She was a prostitute, like me, so I never knew my father. When she died, I was picked up by a man named Kenny, who I thought might’ve been my father for a short while, but as I grew older, I realized he wasn’t. I don’t have any proof, I just know. When he abandoned me at ten, I was alone for a few years before I met Farlan.”

“So… you didn’t get stuck doing this because of your mother?” (Y/N) asked carefully, almost afraid to ask in case it made him shy away from her.

“No,” Levi said slowly. “I was twenty years old when I was caught stealing from a rich friend of this brothel owner. I had made a mistake and there was no way out. He figured out who I was, a thug who was known at the time for carrying out favors for people, whether that meant stealing or killing depended on how much they were willing to pay. Unfortunately, this led them to Farlan, and he gave me a choice. Me, or my best and only friend.”

“And you chose to save your friend at the expense of yourself,” (Y/N) finished for him in a hoarse whisper, filled with horror and unbridled fury at what this man had been through. She figured she should’ve been alarmed, he had just admitted that he had blood on his hands. He was a thief, a thug, a criminal, a murderer. But (Y/N) knew those things were nearly requirements for living in the Underground and no matter how she thought about it, she couldn’t think of anything that would make this man deserve what he was going through.

(Y/N) opened her mouth to say something just as she put the last bandage in place when a loud pounding on the door startled them both. “Time’s up, you two!” The brothel owner shouted through the door.

(Y/N) shot up from the bed and rushed around to where the water and first aid kit sat, quickly packing up the little box of supplies and splashing her face with water, trying to make herself look sweaty enough to look convincing. Once everything had been packed away, (Y/N) stood and shrugged off her leather jacket, throwing it to him.

“Here, take this, it’ll keep your boss from seeing the bandages and trying to get rid of them. It’ll also give your injuries a little more protection from the bacteria in this room.”

Levi wanted to refuse, tell her he couldn’t accept a gift like this, even if it was temporary, but no words would come out as he watched the beautiful woman in front of him mess up her hair and swipe her fingers across her lips, trying to make herself look as wrecked as possible. When she finally looked the part enough to seem convincing, (Y/N) made her way to the door, turning one last time before she opened it to throw him a wink and a sweet smile.

“~Goodbye Levi, I hope we can see each other again soon.”

The lilt in her voice was fake, an act for anyone who may be listening on the other side of the door, meant to be taken as a sickly promise of more sexual endeavors to come, but he could feel the genuine emotion in her statement.

“I hope so too,” Levi said quietly after she had already left, the once comforting quiet of his room now making him feel lonely and empty.

The sound of pounding on his door woke Levi abruptly, making the raven-haired man growl in anger and annoyance. It was rare that the poor man got to sleep, not only because customers could come in at almost any time, day or night, but also because of the horrible insomnia that often plagued him. It made him even more irritable to be woken up, his body sore and his mind groggy as another round of pounding roused him further and prompted him to swing his legs over the side of the small cot he was provided when not busy fucking, and make his way to the door.

“What?” Levi snapped when he swung open the door, genuinely surprised that the pig who owned him hadn’t just burst into his room like he always did, raving about yet another customer for Levi.

“Get your shit, you’re going to the surface.”

Levi blinked. This had to be some kind of joke. The brothel owner never let anyone under his foot leave the brothel, let alone the Underground. Even the highest class noble women couldn’t request for him to come to them, the old man not trusting his prostitutes to be sent back. Especially Levi.

“Oi, your ears gone to shit now? Grab your pathetic bullshit and get out of my sight,” the man snarled, his small, watery eyes narrowed on Levi like he was the scum of the world.

Shaking himself out of it, Levi didn’t hesitate for another moment, rushing back into his room to grab the pitifully few things he had with him, including the leather jacket he had gotten from (Y/N), draping it over his shoulders to hide his healing injuries just in case it was a trick. The festival was still going on afterall, this could just be some ruse the old man set up to make the experience more interesting for the men and women who paid for him.

When Levi returned, the man pulled a gun from his jacket pocket and jerked his head, signaling Levi to follow him. Levi knew better than to risk running. In his full health he could’ve easily escaped from the man’s clutches, but with little more than a half hour of rest, his injured body, weak muscles, and the remnants of the drugs still working through his system, Levi didn’t trust himself to outrun a bullet, and knew the pig wouldn’t hesitate to fire, no matter how valuable Levi was to him. 

Even though Levi kept expecting the brothel owner to turn down a secluded street and lead him right into an ambush or trick of some sort, he never did, leading Levi right to the stairs exiting the Underground. When they reached the guards at the base of the stairs, the man took two slips of paper from the inner pocket of his worn brown coat and showed it to the guard. When he was cleared to continue on, the brothel owner turned and motioned for Levi to stay close as he stomped his way up the stairs, grumbling incoherently to himself all the while.

Breaching the surface, Levi brought an arm to his face, shielding his eyes from the intensity of the sun as it attacked his face with warm, bright light. He eventually got used to it, slowly lowering his arm and rushing to catch up with his boss, who was impatiently grunting for him to hurry up.

Passing through what appeared to be a busy market square, Levi followed the brothel owner along the lively cobblestone streets until they reached a quieter part of the town, stopping along the edge of a beautiful flower field, the grassy meadow filled with colorful blossoms that secretly took Levi’s breath away.

The sound of horse hooves caught his attention, and Levi looked up only to have the air fly from his lungs when (Y/N)’s bright face came into view, the stunning woman seated astride whom he assumed to be Sashay and flanked by two armed men.

“Right on time,” the brothel owner grumbled, his little pig eyes narrowing when he saw her passive aggressive smile.

“Of course I’m on time, this is my deal, remember?”

“Yeah, yeah,” the man growled. “Are you sure you want this one? He’s my most popular, I’d hate to lose him.”

“Yes, he’s the one I want. Besides, I believe the money I’ve paid you has far exceeded the profit you have earned from having him around. I’m sure you will be able to manage.”

The man sneered at her but didn’t respond, using the muzzle of the gun to push Levi forward and digging in his pocket to fish out the same pieces of paper he had shown the guards on the stairs, handing them to (Y/N).

“Thank you, sir. I believe we are done here.”

The brothel owner slunk off, casting dark looks at her but refusing to argue as he hunkered off to head back down to the Underground, where he would continue to rot like the rat he was. Levi watched him go before turning to (Y/N), surprised by the bright smile she flashed him when he met her gaze.

“(Y/N)? What’s going on?”

(Y/N) smiled even wider and held up the pieces of paper she had been handed. One of them was the file labeling him as a slave to the brothel owner, keeping him from escaping, and the other was a bill of sale. His eyes widened when he saw her signature on the bottom of both pages, officially registering her as his new owner. He opened his mouth, about to speak when she took both pages in her hands and ripped them in half, letting the torn pages float onto the street below, forgotten, useless.

“There, you’re free now.”

Levi was at a loss for words, his mouth gaping open. “(Y/N)? What-”

“Before you ask me what my intentions are, I’m just going to tell you that I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I couldn’t stop thinking about your life, your sacrifice, your pain, and I decided I could do something about it. You are human, and damn it, you are an important one! I couldn’t just leave you there. Now, you won’t have to work for anyone but yourself. You won’t have to cater to anyone else’s needs and you can fulfill whatever dreams you have.”

“But, that must’ve cost you a fortune, to cover more than the amount of money he’s made off of using me? What about-”

“You don’t have to worry about me, Levi. I want to use my funds for good, put them towards the people who need it the most. That includes you. Especially you. I couldn’t bear the thought of you having to stay in that shit hole for even a second longer than necessary.”

“What do I do now, then?” Levi asked, trying to focus on keeping his voice steady.

“Well, you can do whatever you want now. You’re a free man, you can find a house and settle down somewhere, or you can go back to the Underground and pick up your life where you left off. You can join the military, or you can start a small business here in the square. It’s anything you want. You get to choose your life now.”

“And what if I don’t want to do any of those things?”

(Y/N) couldn’t help the smile that flashed across her face then, her heart filling with warmth. “Like I said, it’s your choice, you can do whatever you want, carve your own path, but if you want to come with me, you’re always welcome to.”

Levi’s lip twitched and he took a step forward, reaching up to pat Sashay’s muzzle as he got closer. “Alright, I’ll follow you.”

(Y/N) beamed before turning around to nod at each one of her guards, dismissing them. When they had left, presumably returning to (Y/N)’s family estate, she reached down for him, her hand extended for him to take. Placing his rough palm into her warm hand, he allowed her to help him up into the saddle behind her, his arms wrapping around her waist to keep himself secure as (Y/N) kicked Sashay into an easy canter. Sighing blissfully, Levi let himself relax, his chin coming down to rest on (Y/N)’s shoulder as they made their way home, together.

Levi had never expected to see the day when he would willingly go with a noble, but then again, he never thought he’d ever meet a noble like (Y/N). Now, as he felt her warmth soak into his chest, he knew he’d made the right decision.

Levi finally felt the remnant effects of the drugs in his system fade away as the sun beams broke through the fluffy clouds in the sky, leaving his mind clear. He was making this decision all on his own, nothing left to impair his judgement, and no matter what, he knew he would never regret the path he chose to take just so long as (Y/N) stayed by his side.

[maki-s-wife]

Okay, hi, I love your writing and I’ve seen your post AND IM THIRSTY FOR MAKI X F!/GN!READER AND IDK, SIMPLY WRITE ANYTHING YOU WANT? I DIE FOR PINING??? SLOW BURN??? Gjwjfjdengjsj A little angsty??? They have feeling for each other but reader thinks she’s in love with Nobara sort of things?? Or something based on THE song SURRENDER?idk rlly, anyway you wa— OR BASED ON ANOTHER SONG: MERCURY BY SLEEPING AT LAST.

Okay I’m done. Thank you for coming to my tedtalk

Pairing: maki zenin x female!reader

Warnings: none

Word count: 2.4K

I loved this request and I love maki so this fit hand in hand😇 Sorry this took over a month to write it is very very long compared to anything else I’ve done but I still hope you enjoy❤️

It hadn’t been the first time. The first time you sat staring a Maki train with Nobara. Her moves were so swift, much has changed from you and her’s first year.

Panda and Toge sat across from you looking at your moody state, they’ve tried to nudge you to ask out Maki for months now. “y/n they’re just training there’s nothing more going on”, Panda said as you squinted took get a better look at the girls battling. You huffed, “Panda-“. “Bonito flakes”. Toge said with an annoyed look on his face. The two had been experiencing this constant back and forth pining with the both of you for almost a year now. Either they were trying to convince Maki to ask you out or You to ask out Maki.

In your first year Maki was always embarrassed around you. You were much stronger than her and if she was in trouble you were always the one to swoop into save her. She already had motivation to grow in strength but now she had more motivation. She didn’t like the embarrassment of being saved. It wasn’t your fault of course but she didn’t want you to view her as weak.

In your eyes weak was the opposite of what Maki was. To still want to be a sorcerer with her low cursed energy took courage. She was powerful, of someone couldn’t see that you’d threatened to beat that fact into their head.

Panda was about to speak again when there was a huge thump. Looking to where Maki and Kugisaki was training your jaw dropped at the image of Maki pining the first year to the ground. Her enamoring voice spoke her win of the match. Toge looked at you and giggled slightly. “What’s so funny” you said, your face glowing redder than a rose. “Salmon roe” he said. “I-I do not wish that was me you weirdo” you grumbled, the bright blush very apparent on your face. Standing up to chase him around Maki looked over at you. She had trained in front of you on purpose. She wanted you to see her, see how much she’s grown, see her abilities now. It was her way of trying to impress you. She didn’t think she could impress you with much else. Instead she saw you pulling at toges ears yelling into them about some nonsense she couldn’t hear. Maki sighed in defeat, the amount of attempts she had to get your attention always failed.

Panda looked between the two of you seeing Maki now carrying Nobara bridal style to shoko after seeing her leg was injured. You were still chasing Toge around when you looked up to see Maki carrying Kugisaki. You paused in your tracks. “Why was she carrying her, she never Carried me like that...” you mumbled words like these until you reached your room. Throwing yourself in your bed you looked to your side. On your nightstand there was a picture with you, Gojo, Yuuta, Panda, Toge, and Maki. Next to it was a Polaroid. A Polaroid of Maki and you on the day you almost confessed to her. You were hugging in the picture, your faces smushed next to each other, smiling and laughing from the event of the fun festival Gojo took everyone to.

Maki left Nobara with shoko and went to get ready to shower. Going through her dresser to grab products and such she picked up a Polaroid from the same day of the picture you had. In hers you were still close to each other laughing just a in a different area. That day she was so close to confessing to you.

The thing is neither of you remember why you didn’t go through with your plans. Nervousness, fear of rejection, was there another person? None of you could recall. It just didn’t happen and sent Panda and Toge into a grumpy state with Yuuta trying calm the two down.

You’d taken a nap while Maki showered. Groggily trudging through the hallways to find her. It wasn’t as though you’d ignore if she was dating Kugisaki. Simply you’d be jealous...for a very long time. But it would pass at some point...right?

You were snapped from your thoughts when you saw maki walking towards her door. Before you could even wave your hand and say her name she was pulled into her dorm by a hand you could only tell was Nobara’s. You paused for a moment and slowly pulled your hand down. Turning back to walk to your room you bumped into Megumi. “Sorry y/n” he said. You apologized as well but Megumi grabbed your arm. “I was actually supposed to get you, panda asked for you”. You sighed hoping it wasn’t training he was asking for.

When you arrived you saw panda,toge,itadori and now Megumi sitting in seats. “You humans and you complicated feelings” panda grumbled with his arms crossed. Toge following suit imitating him.

In Maki’s room Nobara sat her on her bed. “What’s wrong Nobara” Maki asked eager to go find you after what ever Nobara had to say. Nobara put her foot down. “You know that you have to do it soon, it’s obvious that she likes you back” “with all the spying you make me do it’s very clear”. Maki looked away. She wanted to believe it but it came off as weird that someone would find her attractive. Yes she was confident in herself but the only thing she couldn’t see was someone wanting a relationship with her. Especially you. Nobara huffed “Gojo wants to take us to a festival this year, I heard that happened last year to”. “Yes he did” Maki replied looking back at Nobara. “And you told me you had an elaborate plan last year to get y/n correct?”. Nobara had been Maki’s wing girl as soon as she realized Maki’s crush on you.

Maki hunched over, nodded and sighed. It would be a perfect time to try again but could she really pull it off? She wants to. She truly does. But the fear and embarrassment of rejection still lingers over her as it does you. “Fine I’ll do it but-“. “No buts y/n is head over heels for you and will say yes. She’ll be all-“ queue Nobara making lovey doves faces imitating you in a hysterical way.

Now here you were being pressured into re trying your plan to ask out Maki by the boys. Toge spewing nonsense with a grumpy face, Megumi sitting back not paying attention, itadori being enthusiastic about everything Toge and panda were saying.

“I don’t know...she might say no or worse hate me” you admitted. The fear of Maki hating you was a nightmare.

Finally Megumi stood up. “Y/n your just dragging it out. Do you want to date Maki or not?”. “of course I do” you mumbled. “Then THATS all it will take, Maki likes you and you can beat us all over the head if she somehow says no”. “Now gojo is taking everyone to some festival, that’s when you should do it”. He said before beginning to walk off. Everyone looked at him stunned. No one would have thought Megumi would contribute let alone put yourself in a confident mood ready to execute something you’ve been meaning to do for months.

It’s been a week since you and Maki decided to prepare to ask out the other. The week was fairly normal, Maki and you hung out and trained. Not a day went by without the two of you thinking about today, the day of the festival.

Everyone walked there considering panda couldn’t fit in the only car available (let’s pretend a panda walking and talking In public is normal here)

There were games, food, rides. Everyone was pretty scattered out. Gojo around the snack stands, The boys with you around the games minus Megumi who had decided to go eat in peace somewhere else, and Maki with Nobara by the gift shops”. You looked for Maki around everywhere as it was getting dark, you wanted to spend some normal time around her before the confession. Once you spotted her across the large area you waved and got her attention. Itadori and panda wishing you luck while Toge did the same but still stared holes into your head as you jogged over to Maki making sure you didn’t turn back.

Maki looked over to Nobara who had paid for her things. “Go, when the time is right you’ll know”. Nobara said putting her thumbs up with a large smile. Maki gave her a final hug before turning around to see you already there.

You rubbed the back of your neck awkwardly, starting to get nervous. A hug didn’t mean dating but people who do date usually hug-.

Trying to push down your nerves you greeted Maki and went off the play games and go on rides.

You almost completely forgot all your worries as you won prizes from games, got dizzy from rides, and ate various sweets with Maki. The entire time Maki was becoming more flushed in the face. Everything you did set her to look at you in awe. Often catching herself staring at you before you could see yourself.

The night was coming out and the both of you were reminded of your tasks.

Maki was about to speak when you did first. “Can we...go over there”. You pointed behind her. Maki looked back to see the vast area with many blossomed trees and grass. She nodded...but what could you want to go over there for?

You sat and patted next to you. She sat down next to you and you mumbled somethings he couldn’t hear. “Hm?”

“Can I ask you something maki?” You said more clearer. “Alright, about what” now Maki was concerned. Did you catch her staring at you? Did she freak you out? Did you know about her feelings and came her to let her down easy?

You waited a moment. “What is I-“ “are you and Kugisaki dating?”. You asked bringing your knees up to your face slowly squeezing them tighter. Maki looked at you shocked. “huh, What made you think that?” She said completely baffled. you perked up “wait so your not?” You asked your jaw now slack open. “No?? Seriously when did we ever seem that way”. You let out a huge sigh falling backwards onto the cold grass. Maki didn’t know what to say. How does she ask you out from here? All she could do was go for it.

“Y/n I think-“ “well the true reason I asked you here for was...” you took a deep breath it was now or wait months more to try again. “I have feelings for you, like romantic feelings”. You turned away from her as you said it. The silence was so loud until you heard small laughs coming from Maki.

Now she was laughing at you, great. “Um just ignore tha-“ you began as you started to get up ready to run off for a while out of humiliation. But before you could you felt Maki’s slender fingers softly grab your chin, pulling your face closer to hers in for a kiss. It last fir no longer than 5 seconds but when you pulled away for face could be compared to the reddest tomato known to man.

“I can’t believe you beat me to it...or really said it at all” Maki said laying her hands on yours. “You- wait...WHAT”. You blinked fast, was this a dream? A joke? Did you really just get to kiss the girl you’ve had feelings for almost since you met her.

“I planned to tell you the same news y/n, but I guess we both had the same plans”. Maki looked at you her blush very noticeable making you heat up more.

After a couple more minutes of explanation you were both in each other’s grasp laughing and continuing to talk about how this was supposed to happen long before today.

Spying on you from afar was the rest of the group who watched the whole thing go down even Megumi. Toge did dances with yuuji, panda clapping his hands (paws?), and Megumi with a slight smile on his face.

They were happy that the two of you were finally happy together now.

[spiltscribbles]

57. “Wait a second.. are you jealous?” + Poorly Timed Confession + modern au 😍 pretty please!!!

~Notes: OMFG angel!!! Thank you SO SO much for the prompt<3 You are a complete babe! I hope you like :S It’s cheese, but like also what else would I do? LMFAO XD

.-

Smash Prompt Game  |  Send Me A Prompt💜 |  A Reblog Is Like An I Love You!!

.-

“Hmmm… All right, would you rather, mmm… Smell Borris Johnson’s sweaty gym socks, or snog Professor Slughorn full on the mouth for a straight minute— oh erm, not so straight I reckon on second thought.”

Remus wrinkles his nose at him from across the bed, and clucks his tongue at the awful pun. “You’re unruly.”

“And you’re dodging,”

“Am not arse, I’m just recovering from that very terrifying scenario you’ve spewed out like the sadistic satanist you are.”

“Which scenario are you recovering from though?” Sirius leers, wiggling his eyebrows and jostling Remus’s textbook with his foot.

“I hate that you’re enjoying this so much,” Remus intones in a deadpan.

“Mary John, I’m waiting,” Sirius says with far too much glee.

Sometimes Remus is sure that he hates him. “Fine, the answer is I hate you.”

“Filthy and slanderous lies, Lupin.”

“You’re demented.”

“Five. Four. Three—“

“I won’t choose.”

“See,  all I hear is that you wanna get it on with our chemistry professor, you saucy minx, you.”

Remus sniffs. “Better than touching that prick with even a ten foot pole.”

“Mmmm, have I ever told you how hot and heavy I get hearing you talk politics at me?”

Remus throws him the bird, which makes Sirius laugh. Remus can objectively say that Sirius has the most beautiful variations of laughter in the world, and he’d know considering he’s catalogued each one. This version is definitely top three. His care free, effortless laugh when Remus takes him off guard with a snide remark or lowly muttered retort that’s not appropriate for most company— It’s really more of a experience, truly. His breaths stutter out in a lovely staccato, and his eyes glimmer like the sea, and sometimes it feels like the world’s been suspended and it’s only the two of them in that slice of eternity.

Erm, Ah, but yeah…. That only happens occasionally, and it’s only because Sirius is Remus’s greatest friend— has been since the final year of primary school after Remus had moved to the London outskirts from his small, coastal town in Wales, and on first sight, Sirius swung a snowball straight to Remus’s face, which he of course responded to by throwing two more his way, and well… The pair of them were soaking and breathless by the end of it, but their fate was sealed, they were the greatest of friends, and nothing would ever alter that unquestionable staple.

So what if sometimes Remus’s chest thuds painfully when Sirius dimples his way, or Remus only ever wants to talk to him over anyone else— even Lily or his Mam— if he’s had a bad day, or good one, or if something remarkable had happened, or , or… Or whenever really. And there’s absolutely no significance that Remus can’t help the totally delighted grin that splits his face in half whenever he gets a text or snap from Sirius.

None of that is at all relevant.

Sirius is Remus’s greatest friend, and he’d never risk ruining that by allowing some pesky little crush swallow him whole and clammer out his mouth— vulnerable and throbbing in the open space between them. It doesn’t matter if Marlene always makes kissy faces their way, or how James only ever refers to them as a couple, and so what if Peter’s got a pole running that Remus knows basically the whole school is betting on. 

They’re all wrong, Sirius would never, ever feel the same sort of way that Remus does him, that’s downright preposterous and ridiculous and just simply impossible. And Remus’s perfectly content with that very real truth… He is.

Remus is fine with it God help him. So everyone else just needs to but the fuck out of their business.

Besides, this, this right now— Him and Sirius splayed out on opposite ends of Remus’s bed, with Sirius’s feet nudging at Remus’s elbow whenever he’s got a question about there homework, with the window cracked open just so, letting in some of the chilly winter air because Sirius absolutely can not focus if he’s not cold— the fucking furnace— Where Remus can still hear the going ons of his family playing out on the floor below them… This is the most perfect place in Remus’s eyes, and he won’t ever change that, especially not to live out some boyhood fantasy that would never come into fruition in his wildest of dreams.

Remus’s content… He is… He has to be or else he’d lose one of the most vital people in his world.

.-

“You’ve got footie practice after school, right?”

“Mmhmm, you coming to watch?”

“Only if you admit i’m your good luck charm,” Remus sardonically bats his lashes at Sirius as if he was in a mascara advert, and the taller boy  blows a raspberry right back at him.

“Nice, real nice. You’re extraordinarily mature, you know that, Black?”

“And sexy, don’t forget that, oh so important descriptor Lupin.”

Remus leans against the locker besides Sirius’s, watches as he trades his current binders for the lot he’ll need for the afternoon, and tries really hard not to stare too longingly at how Sirius’s arm muscles ripple beneath their school’s  maroon, uniform jackets  in the most delicious of ways. (He hates the fact he’s been dissolved into a starry eyed mess lusting over the star striker, but thus is his fate.)

“I’d never commit such a faux pas, and I’m insulted that you’d ever think as much.”

Sirius sneers at him with a slight shake to his head. “So you coming or not?”

“I’m still contemplating my options,” he preens, but before Sirius could retort, Marlene, megawatt smile and dangerously sharp  smirk— swaggers over towards them.

“Good morning my two beautiful chums!”

“What do you want?” Sirius asks before even glancing her way, to which Marlene blinks up at him, faux owlish. “S, I just wanted to greet a couple of my closest companions this lovely December morning,” she defends herself.

“Marls, you’re never this agreeable before noon,” Remus points out hesitantly.

“ And you rarely are even afterwards,” Sirius tacks on.

“Rude,” she pouts.

“Accurate,” Remus pipes in with an apologetic grimace.

Marlene stares them both down for a solid minute before finally relaxing her shoulders, and thrusting out the legal pad in her grasp. “The student council and spirit society are selling corsages for the snowflake formal, and Dorcas has deployed me to get some orders.”

“Whipped,” Sirius teases through a counter-fit cough.

Marlene doesn’t hesitate before smashing the legal pad on his head. “And you traipsing around getting people to buy the tickets for the theatre department last semester even though Re was only playing Mercutio wasn’t you being wrapped around his littlest finger?”

Remus flushes, feeling an unnerving amount of bees stinging around his stomach, and is thankful when the conversation pauses after Sirius casts her a very heated V.  “Sod off.”

“So are you guys gonna buy or not?” Marlene huffs, weight slung to her left hip, and arms crossed against her chest.

“I’m a gay bloke, Marls, did you forget that?” Remus pins her with a one eyed squint, and she just scrunches her face up at him, exasperated.

“I’m sure there’s matching boutonnieres.”

“Fine, I just don’t have any school spirit  then.”

This time she glares. “Lily and James are Head Boy and Head Girl, isn’t there like an oath between you lot,  one for all and all for one, or some rot?”

“That’s the three musketeers,” he says.

“isn’t that basically who you guys are?” She reasons.

Before their wage of words could continue, Sirius just grabs the order form out of Marlene’s hands and fills out a sheet with the flurry of his pen. “Happy?”

“Positively delighted,” she leers, pecking them both on the cheek before strutting off, reminding them of their group study session at Alice’s tonight in her wake.

Sirius shakes his head, reluctantly amused with a grin gathering on the corners of his mouth, but for Remus everything feels like it’s frozen. “You didn’t have to do that you know? ’S not like James is much of a Head Boy anyhow, and Lily wouldn’t have really cared.”

Sirius shrugs, commences their walk to the opposite wing of the school for their shared history class. “Emmy likes that sort of romantical shite.”

Remus sees red, feels his heart lodging in his damn esophagus. “Oh, so— Erm,  you’re taking her then,” Remus wonders if his tone sounds as detached as he feels.

“Yeah,” Sirius eyes him, questioning. “She wants that title of snow queen real bad, made me promise I’d campaign with her and the whole shtick.”

“Oh,” it’s like Remus could feel it when he closes off completely, can feel his hopes squashed down and his heart contract and his every organ collapsing in on themselves, leaving him feeling hollowed out completely.

Sirius slows down marginally, eyeing him with a slight frown. “Is that all right? I know you two don’t exactly get along and we were planning to go as a group, bu—“

“It’s fine,” Remus hates how screechy his voice gets, how he feels like he’s about to scream. “You two are a shoe in, no doubt.”

Sirius tries to mirror Remus’s faux excitement with a tepid grin of his own, but Remus doesn’t let him, instead commandeering their typical table on the back row and tries focussing on the thousandth war with France while his world tilts off kilter.

.-

Emmy is beautiful, and popular and her smile alone dazzles the whole room. She’s everything that Sirius should look for in a partner, someone to match his whip lash wit, and his taste for all things exuberant that skirt on flashy, and someone who’s got just as many friends and admirers as him.

They’re perfect and Remus should just get over his petty ass hatred of her, even if he still thinks she can be down right cruel and selective and selfish. Qualities Sirius surely isn’t… But maybe it’s all in his head how she sneers at people who she finds plane, or how she literally guffaws over the misfortune of others. Maybe his perception of how she wields people in like moths to a flame just to get what she wants is all a misunderstanding, or in his head or something.

Maybe all that’s possible, even if Remus seriously doubts it.

But at the end of the day, Sirius loves her— has been basically infatuated by Emmeline Vance since she first transferred at the start of their Freshman year. Sirius loves her, and who ever Sirius loves is merely an extension of him… Right?

Remus just needs to get over it and somehow rid himself of this crush he’s been fostering for so long it’s basically a part of him at this point. Though, he thinks it’d be a lot easier if he didn’t see their faces plastered on posters everywhere the week and a half leading up to the dance— looking like actual royals that would put Will and cate to shame.

.-

“Yo cheekbones!”

Remus starts, swivels around from where he was scratching his pen to paper, finding Sirius— as glimmering and beautiful as always— swaggering up to him, insanely electric smile painted over his face.

“Would you rather eat a jumbo jar of jalapeños without a break, or eat the toenails from someone with athlete’s foot next to your dinner every night of the rest of your life?”

“I thought you were having lunch with Emmy to keep up your royalty status before this weekend?” Remus asks, tacitly side stepping from the horrific images swimming to the forefront of his mind because of his cruel question.

“Now that doesn’t sound like an answer to my ultimatum,” Sirius says in a singsong sort of voice.

“You answer me first,” Remus says airily.

“But I asked first,” Sirius argues haughtily.

“Well both your options would kill me, so I wouldn’t do either,” Remus retorts.

“That’s not how the game works!”

“You’re the one who always says that rules were made to be broken,” Remus says, lofty as all get out,, and dissolves into laughter at the completely cross look Sirius’s giving him.

“You were born to be contrary, weren’t you?”

“So lunch?”

“Got bored,” he shrugs, hopping onto the corner of the desk Remus’s working on. “What you up to instead of eating?”

“My position paper for Model UN.” Sirius smiles down at him, and Remus can’t help the flush that spreads across his cheeks in return. “Not as glamorous as running as Snow King, I know.”

“It’s precious,” Sirius contends, his soft timbre sounding like syrup and his long fingers fluttering against Remus’s skin, pushing back a lock of his ever disheveled, tawny curls in a far to gentle way, and Remus gulps before averting his gaze to break the sudden tautness that’s built between them. 

They’ve had so many of these almost moments, ones that Remus’s always treasured but he knows doesn’t mean much of anything at all to Sirius— Sirius who is effortlessly hilarious, and brims with genius and  who is so beautiful that sometimes it hurts looking at him for too long. Sirius who has a new suitor at his beck and call on a near weekly basis. But whenever they transpire now, it just hurts all the more because Remus knows in his heart of hearts that they will never lead anywhere, and Sirius is in love with Emmy and Remus can’t let himself float around in this daydream for any longer.

“Ahem,” he clears his throat, shuffles in his seat only slightly. “I’m Algeria so my Mam’s pretty excited about it. She’s been telling me all the stuff Wikipedia’s got wrong and everything.”

Sirius laughs, but it doesn’t touch his eyes. “Your mother is kinda everything, you know that?”

Remus twists his mouth up, reluctant. “Don’t tell her as much, or else she’ll go on and on how she won Miss Teen Great Britain when she was only sixteen.”

“Hmm, I was wondering where you got that pretty face.”

“You, Sirius Black, can go lick an unwashed arse.”

“You’ll never catch a suitor with that cheek of yours though. I’d work on that, Lupin.”

“I don’t think I could ever win Miss Congeniality, alas.”  Remus doesn’t quite catch Sirius’s reply, to busy responding too the text his phone just chirped with instead.

“Mary John, are you listening?”

“Uh-huh.”

Sirius’s brows hike up, flabbergasted smile stretched across his face. “So totally rude! And I came all the way here— to the place where dreamers die— just to spend time with you.”

“Sorry,” Remus gives him an abashed little half grin before setting the phone back down. “’s just Fabian.”

Sirius’s expression drops, goes inquisitive instead of his typical ebullience. “Fabian? Why’s Fabian Prewett texting you, and why is he,” Sirius crooks his head so he’s able to read the new message that popped up on Remus’s phone’s screen. “Asking about color coordination?”

Remus blushes for an entirely new reason now, one he likes much less. “Ah, he’s the sort to like it when our suits like match, but not in an abrasive fashion, you know?”

Sirius’s face goes scarily blank.

“Your suits? Suits for what?”

“The dance…” Remus says slowly, he’s confused what Sirius’s confused about.

“The dance… Right… I thought you were still going with everyone else?”

“Pff, no way,” Remus scoffs. “Lily’s  only pretending to be single, you know how red in the face she gets whenever around James. They’ll end up dancing the whole night away. And with Dorcas running the whole event and Benjy thinking any social function is a plague on society, that’d leave me stuck with Peter and Mary, . And honestly I’ve seen enough of her tongue shoved down his throat for a lifetime.” Remus is only slightly  surprised that doesn’t even elicit a chuckle from Sirius, who’s now looking a bit stormy— and he thinks he’ll never be accustomed to his mercurial moods that can change as quickly as the snap of the finger.

“Right… So you’re going with Fabian Prewett… as your date?”

“Yes… Why is that so hard to believe?”

“it’s, it’s not,” Sirius scrambles, suddenly standing up.

“Then why are you being so weird about this,” Remus argues, getting up to meet him at his level.

“Am not!”

“You’re going with Emmy,” Remus reminds him, this edge of desperate.

“I know I am, okay. But you— you—“ Sirius tappers off, eyes glassy and lips parted with words he can’t get out, and Jesus fucking Christ is it weird how for the first time ever their roles have reversed. Sirius can’t put any sentences together, and everything Remus’s been beating down—  everything thrashing inside of him— are now burning his throat and warring over who can spill out first.

“What? I’m suppose to stay behind like the pathetic, nobody friend. The guy who’s just there to moon after you while you have an actual life. The Judie garland to your Mickie Roomie!”

“What are you even talking about right now!” Sirius shouts, sounding as torn apart as Remus feels.

“As if you don’t know!” He snarls, collecting his books into his backpack— Suddenly this room feels to stifling. He can’t breathe and it’s too hot and his chest is pounding.

He’s imploding and Remus has no idea how to rectify it.

“Just stop! Remus Stop!”

“leave me the fuck alone Sirius!”

“Why are you being such a prick about this!”

And that, that makes Remus angry, angrier than he’s ever been.

Before he could even think about it for a moment longer, Remus is rounding on him, dashing so close to Sirius that he can taste his breath with how close their faces are skirting against each other.

“I’m in love with you! I’ve been in love with you for forever, and I know that you don’t feel the same way, and I know that you’re in love with Emmy and, and I just know okay.”

“Wha—“ Sirius sputters, looking like a gaping fish. “Wait a second, are you jealous? Of sodding Emmy Vance?”

“Don’t!” Remus practically growls out. "Don’t disrespect me, okay? Don’t pretend that you never knew, or that I was such a good actor. I’ve been in love with you for years and you always knew and Fine, I get it. You never felt the same way, that’s fine. But just don’t pretend as if you never had the choice, don’t make me out as the bad guy for actually, finally saying yes to a bloke who’s actually into me. I need to fucking give up on the premise of us, I need to get over you. So I’m going out with fucking Fabian Prewett and you’re going out with Emmy Vance and that’s that!”

His breaths are labored, jagged and painful, as they race out of him, but Remus can’t move. He’s staring straight into Sirius’s beautiful, gray eyes, and he sees everything he’s always seen there, and hates that this is probably the last time he’ll get to be this close to him.

Not after this.

“I didn’t,” is the first thing Sirius croaks out, broken and helpless. “i didn’t know, Remus you have to believe me— I didn’t—”

“How! How could you not know!” He shouts back, but Remus doesn’t get his answer in so many words, instead he feels it.

He feels it when Sirius clamps his hands on either end of his waste-line, feels it when Sirius smashes their lips together in a cacophony of lips, and teeth and spit. He feels it when Sirius moans in side of him, when his hand moves down, spreads across the width of the small of his back, pushing their torsos even closer. Remus feels it when everything goes into focus, when he takes Sirius into his arms, greedy and excited and disbelieving.

And Remus thinks to all the other times he’s kissed another boy— To this prior weekend swapping snogs with a beaming Fabian in the back of a theatre. He thinks of how there was never anything worth anything when he kissed any of them Because it was all Sirius, always Sirius. And he could try to love Fabian, or some other cute boy, and he tried, and he tried, and he tried, and he gave all he had…but it was never enough, could it ever be enough?

Remus knows it in his bones that it’s enough when it’s with Sirius.

When they finally pull apart it’s difficult to breathe and Remus feels lightheaded and it’s wonderful in the most marvelous of ways.

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” Sirius says in a whisper. 

“Maybe next time give a guy some warning?” Remus can’t help the shit eating smirk that swipes across his mouth and is elated at the adorably cross scowl Sirius answers him with.

“Fine jackass, how’s this for a warning, I’m gonna kiss you now.”

“That’ll be sufficient, I suppose,” Remus goads, laughing against Sirius’s lips when he does just that.

~*~

Sirius ends up winning snow king, but rejects the dance with Emmy, opts to ask Remus to join him instead, as if they were in the middle of some John Hughes movie from the fucking 80s.

It’s utterly ridiculous and overdone and simply way too much— but everyone applauded and cheered and when Sirius kissed him in the middle of it, Remus felt as if his whole body sung with joy.

.-

~My Wolfstar FIC Masterlist

[celamoon]

There’s so many Saiki x reader fics that I wanna write but I don’t have the time for it and UGH I’ll just toss them all here in hopes that I’ll actually write it one day.

Reminder to self: Italics - Means alternatively and not part of regular script

1. Spooning - Hurt/comfort (My mommy and daddy issues are showing LMAO)

Saiki spoons you whenever you get into a fight with your parents. He doesn't have demanding parents like you do but he tries his best to help you out. So he settles for holding you close to himself even though he hates physical contact, and he settles for drawing little shapes on your back while you cry into his chest. He hates skin-to-skin contact with just about everyone, but for some reason, he can't bring himself to push you away. He lets you rest on his chest until your quiet sobs are nothing more than soft snores, and he helps you wipe a piece of hair away. When he's sure you've fallen asleep, he lets himself close his eyes. You wake up the next morning, still in his arms, close to his chest.

2. My Sunshine - Hurt/No comfort, Major character death

Every time 'you are my sunshine' comes on Kusuo's playlist he feels his heart break little by little. because years ago you used to sing it to him before he reset the earth back by one year. The first words of the year to him were always 'you are my sunshine', you always smiled at him as if the year didn't reset again, and you always sang the song on the way to school. His only regret was not realizing that you were throwing up petals sooner, and not confessing to you before you let yourself wither away. Now all Kusuo has left for himself is a short voice message you sent him years ago to soothe him to sleep.

3. Sweet Melody - Player au (OOC from canon)

Saiki’s one of the most notorious players in the school, he even dumped Teruhashi after dating her for a month or so. After losing a bet to one of your friends, you become hell bent on playing the player. You successfully lure him in, and eventually you two start dating. The only issue is that you can’t seem to play him the more you get to know about him. Turns out it was the same case as before, he only pretended to open up to you and kept everything important to himself. He plans to breaks up with you in front of the school like always only to find out that you had dug deeper than he intended and had more than enough dirt on him. He tethers between actually dating you and only pretending to date you before he decides upon breaking up with you for the better.

4. Good in Goodbye - Exes Au (Reader's side)

Saiki broke up with you as planned in Sweet Melody so you write a song reminding him of all the dirt you have on him. Your goal isn’t to break his heart anymore, it’s to remind him of all the people he’s hurt. You fell for him hard, much harder than planned, so you decide to toss everything into a song that blew you up. You two meet up at a modelling gig years later after you find out that Saiki’s your photographer. He’s changed, but so have you.

5. All Time Low - Exes Au (Kusuo's side)

Saiki's side of the break up. Seeing your ex in your class every day is hard, but being unable to move on hurts more. Especially since third year has just ended and college is laying ahead. Stuck brooding over his feelings for you, Saiki decides to become a photographer in hopes to have you as his model and muse one day. The universe proves to be on his side this time, especially since you were his next model. He wants to reconcile what you once had, but you seem to have other plans.

6. Better than Revenge - Player Au (Again)

Saiki breaks up with you after Teruhashi finally steals him from you. What do you do? Cry over it with ice cream, then do what every good student turned bad does. You play. She breaks your happiness so you teach Teruhashi a very important lesson. No one out-dos you, especially someone like her. She may have a fanbase, but you have something better, you have an army and that army is always ready to throw hands for you regardless of who it is.

7. Talkative - Hurt/comfort

Saiki k angst where he calls you annoying so you completely stop talking and you lock yourself in for a week. Saiki is forced to teleport to your place after you don't show up to school. He finds you sitting in your closet, looking sicker than ever. He bites down on his words and helps nurse you back to health as an apology.

8. Heather - Hurt. ANGST!

You're Saiki's best friend and you watch Saiki fall in love with Teruhashi over the episodes. Third year finally begins, and you watch as Teruhashi's confession runs in success, cheering for the newly formed couple as if you were alright. You start drifting away, and Saiki doesn't seem to care that much. Until you hear that he broke up with Teruhashi and find him in front of your door, eyes brimming with tears with apologies spewing out of his mouth.

9. Fine. - Angst (semi-prologue of My Sunshine {2})

You and Saiki get into a particularly bad argument over him spending time with Teruhashi over the weeks and he accuses you of being clingy and selfish. So you leave the house because he’s being preposterous and you need time to calm down. You and Saiki have never fought like that before. Your vision gets blurry from the tears and you pass out onto the pavement from exhaustion. You wake up in the hospital room and find your boyfriend with dark circles under his eye. He had never been so terrified of losing something. The only issue is that you're not actually awake, and that you've just passed.

10. No u - Psychic! Reader au (Written)

Funny enough the new transfer student isn’t strange. If anything they’re hot as hell and Saiki swears he’s never like this. Things make sense once he realizes the other student is psychic and used mind control to have everyone love them. You find Saiki’s struggle out of your web funny and decide to entertain him. How? By seeing how far you can get with the teasing.

11. (Insert vine) aWw hEll nAww - Soulmate AU

It’s been around 3-4 decades since Saiki was born and so far he hasn’t aged a day past 18 since he never found his soulmate. Y/n finally waltzes into his life one faithful Monday morning and Saiki teleports away instantly because he’s enjoyed not aging and he was not doing this now. Y/n on thé other hand starts to age slowly (so does Saiki but shh) and eventually they decide to track the man down because wHO THstE HELL JUST WALKS OUT FROM THEIR SOULMATE LIKE THAT HUH?? Chaos ensues.

12. Darkened Wishes - Thousand Crane Au

Kusuo left you years ago, so you fold a crane a day for 3 years so that you could wish that he would return to you. What they didn't tell you though, was that for each wish you make a thing of the same value is taken away from the earth. After you make the wish you find out that Kusuo's wife suffered from a miscarriage and passed away. You feel terrible so you hide yourself, but you made the wish, so the cranes won't leave you alone until you fulfill what they granted you. After all, you aren't allowed to back away from a wish you made, they already opened up the path for you anyway.

13. It's Tough to be a god - Corrupt CEO AU

Y/n is the heir to the L/n business empire, one step away from rising to the top. After manipulating her parents out of the line to the top of the business empire and paying her way up positions, they set out to finally secure the position of CEO. Though evil in their ways, they're incredibly good at treating their workers like humans. They lack nothing, except for that final company that they need to buy over.

Saiki Kusuo is the CEO of the Saiki Enterprises. After his brother started a rival company to out-business the Saiki Enterprises, Kusuo's been cautious in whose business contracts he accepts. He receives a contract from the L/n business empire to purchase a branch of the company, and he refuses for security reasons. This ticks off Y/n, who then does everything in their power to destroy Kusuo's company, including seduction and destruction.

(Or alternatively) Kusuo wants nothing to do with that business he's inheriting and sells it off to Y/n, only he accidentally signs off himself too. And now he's in a mess of 'I'm techincally property' and paying the fine of breaking the contract. Lucky for him, it's just one year of 'dating'. Kusuo has never had such a migraine before, but he supposes if he can't destroy you the business way, he should break you down, starting from the heart. He finds that you're an excellent manipulator though, and soon he's the one stuck in your web.

14. Contacts - Scientist! Reader (Written)

Meet Y/n L/n, world's youngest awarded engineer. You hate Kuusuke, but I mean his brother was Lowkey kinda cute-

You're an engineer, an excellent one that is. You created all sorts of devices to help out psychics since you're one yourself. One of them which Kuusuke stole from you when you were 4-5. Some days you wanted to punch him in the face for that. But ignoring all of that, you finally manage to make it into PK Academy and you're absolutely determined to become friends with Kusuo. He tolerates you, maybe even thinks of you as a best friend, but the only issue is that he refuses to wear those contacts that block out his petrifaction powers. The house erupts into chaos as you try to get Kusuo to wear the lenses.

15. Object - Yandere Au

Saiki has a lot of potential to become a yandere. He’d be able to do it so smoothly too! He’d make sure that your love meter is high, ask you out, sweep you off your feet, all while he kills anyone who would even dare to look your way! He’ll even control the world if he has to! After all, his darling can’t have anything other than perfection right? And of course, you’re the entire thing that the new perfectionist modelled after! No one is ever going to become perfect like you and Saiki will make sure of it. But of course, his pretty little thing isn’t allowed to know about all of this. After all, you’re the only thing that can’t be tainted with sin in his eyes.

16. Names - Fae Au OH GOD I JUST SAW SOMEONE POST ABT SAIKI K AUS AND I COMPLETELY FORGOT MERMAIDS AND MYTHICAL CREATURES EXISTED-

There's one rule when you meet a Fae. You're not allowed to give them your name. Y/n bumps into the fae that's been the talk of the town lately. Ever since said Fae stole away Teruhashi, the townspeople have been terrified of him. Funny enough, Y/n becomes friends with said fae. Saiki wants them to join him in his place but Y/n declines. Funny enough, there's another boy trying to court you. Saiki decides upon one thing, he's going to get your name before that wretched boy gets to your heart.

17. Your Highness (or Pensées D’amour) - Royal au (Written)

Saiki Kusuo is the reputable heir to the Psi Empire. Ever since the eldest of the two ran away to beat him in conquering nations, he had been left the throne. His grandparents had anointed him as the heir to the throne after his parents had mysteriously disappeared. The only issue lies in finding another noble or royal to marry. Princess Teruhashi from the Gardenia Kingdom has a huge crush on him, but Saiki isn’t interested in her. She feels too fake to trust, not to mention her atrocious thoughts. Another issue is that Saiki doesn’t want to marry someone for status, he wants to marry for love, ironic enough.

Y/n is the infamous royal of the Sirius Kingdom. Hotheaded, fiery, competitive and passionate, they’re well loved by all of their people, and hated by all the nobles. Their parents never forced them into any marriage and they spend their day getting to know the commonfolk and taking suggestions from them to their parents (which are always rejected). 

The nobles are planning something against the royal family, and in a desperate turn of events they find themselves promising themselves to Saiki Kusuo of the Psi empire in exchange for help. Kusuo helps them out, and in the end both get their end of the bargain. Kusuo gets himself a person who genuinely loved him, and Y/n gets themselves a willing listener for the commonfolk.

[downwiththemutantnjnjaturtles]

We Met Within This Screen (chapt. 4)

[Donnie x fem reader]

sfw, chapt. 3, pt. 4 here

Sighing, you set your phone face-down after sending your last text to Bo. What an abrupt end to something that had been so good. You were confused, a little taken aback and honestly sad. You'd thought the two of you were getting along well. Bo was smart, well-spoken, funny, and all around, a really nice person. He listened to your venting and seemed like he had a response to everything. Always, he had some random fact to hit you with whether it was about biology, chemistry, astronomy, language—you weren't sure where he got all his knowledge from. He'd never mentioned school, if he went. He didn't mention a lot about himself, actually. 

People come and go, someone had once told you. You guessed that he was one of those passersby, as much as you wanted it to be more. 

More?

When had you started thinking that? More what? 

You were tempted to pick your phone back up, to check and see if there were any new messages. Not that you could expect much; Bo had been so curt about his exit from your friendship that it was left at his last text, "Again, I'm sorry." You wanted to say something, but what was there to say? It was his decision. A sudden, uncharacteristic, and frankly odd decision, but still, his. Thinking back on it, you tried to remember any instance you might have crossed a line, or maybe said something you shouldn't have. That's what made you open up the messages again, scrolling up and up and looking for anything weird, but finding nothing of the sort. It had all been normal up until when you texted him about the clamor you'd heard outside your apartment building. And then it went flat—he didn't even respond to it, just said his apology and his goodbye before going offline.

You wanted to take your mind off it with a game, but as you looked through your list and saw the one you and him had played together, you knew it was near ruined for you. It just wasn't the same to play alone or with your acquaintances. An otherwise boring game made fun by one particular person, but now it was barely what it used to be.

Unfortunate. 

The next morning might have felt more normal if it weren't for the fact that everyone was pretending like it was. For the sake of secrecy from their father. As far as Donnie knew, Splinter still didn't know anything was or had been going on, and he intended to keep it that way, too. He wanted to tell his father, he did, but all he saw coming of that was reprimanding, or at the very least an awkward discussion, and possibly, time in the Hashi. He was already feeling the aftermath of his actions; he didn't need any more. Especially as he checked the messaging app one last time, only to find it empty, aside from her goodbye. 

Donnie stood at the kitchen counter, mask off and groggy as usual, scrounging for something to eat. Maybe a cup of coffee (if they had any), which he was looking for when Mikey bounced in. Normally, his brothers would avoid him when he was in one of his "moods". He hadn't a passionate temper like Raph but a slow-brewing one, the kind that festers until it's alleviated or boils over. Cold quiet was his thing. 

But Donnie knew why he was here. So did Mikey. He had that familiar glint of mischief in his eye. 

There was no coffee, so he settled for some kind of pastry they'd found while looking through the dumpsters. Really, the item was fine—only the packaging and appearance was defective. It was a wonder just how much food grocers wasted over arbitrary reasons, but regardless, he was happy to oblige his secret sweet tooth. 

From the corner of his eye he could see Mikey waiting eagerly for him to turn around and regard him. To listen to whatever he was about to talk his ear off with. Their youngest brother was more often than not bright-eyed in the morning, something Donnie's morning fog could not always entertain. He picked at his food at the counter for a moment, mind wandering back to his night and subsequently,  the unresolved feelings. Dreadfully unresolved, he groaned inside. And they probably would continue to be, as after sleeping on what had happened the previous night, thinking about her, he realized something that made his face flush. Oh, no. 

He froze in his place, suddenly very awake. He looked over his shoulder and found Mikey was distracted rummaging through the food for his own breakfast, and with a faint cringe, tried to sneak out of the kitchen undetected. No way would he admit to Mikey's words on the rooftop that night, the ones that made him flinch with embarrassment. The same ones that bounced around his head despite all attempts to stuff it down. "You like her, bro." 

Things involving him could never be simple, could they?

Abandoning his plate, Donnie began tip-toeing out of the room right behind Mikey. His foot hit the leg of a chair and caused a creak—he winced. As he thought, Mikey looked back, "Why are you sneaking around? You didn't finish your breakfast. Can't go on patrol on an empty stomach, dude." 

Before Donnie could even answer, he continued in a whisper, "Plus—"

"Whatever it is, Mikey, not now," he cut his brother off, "last night was the end of it, alright? You need to let it go." It sounded harsher than he would have preferred, but he felt the need to drill it into Mikey's skull that it was over, that it was just something he'd have to deal with. There were a lot of things they dealt with despite not liking it. With time, he'd forget—more accurately, be able to ignore— and maybe he could find the same enjoyment in his brothers once again. That sort of friendship.  But at the moment, it was ruined for him—he got a taste of something more and it was taken away what felt like second later. 

Mikey's face fell. Donnie couldn't stand that, seeing him upset over something he'd said. He had a bit of a soft spot for their youngest, no doubt. Just wasn't always obvious. 

"Aren't you afraid you'll regret it?" he asked, voice soft. 

Fear was a strong word, but of course Donnie was anxious. It was the thing holding him back from being able to simply compartmentalize everything, to put it in a box and on the metaphorical "deal with this later because it's uncomfortable right now" shelf. Or to deal with it at all, as ignoring his problems with studying and unrelated research and experimentation wasn't exactly prime management. He knew that. 

After a while of thought, Donnie was able to give him an answer. "Well…I mean, how could I not be?" he inquired in return before leaning out of the doorway to scan the lair. Everyone was either in their room, the dojo, or there, in the kitchen. Mikey has always made him feel most comfortable, and he was sure that was the case for the other three, just that they had other ways of showing it. He was certainly easy to talk to; if Donnie weren't so careful of his mouth and what came out of it, he could probably spew way more to him than he liked. Mikey could come through sometimes, though, which prompted him to keep going, "It was a big thing for me. We've been disconnected from everything else for so long that it was just...exciting, to get a look into what it's like. Being 'regular', you know?" 

Mikey sat down on one of the bar stools, feet idly shuffling against the floor as he folded his arms and rested on them. "You didn't hear it from me, but I'm a little jealous," he said playfully, but Donnie was aware that it was the case. "Maybe I'm pushing you to go after her because I'm trying to live vic–vicrous–v–…" 

Donnie smiled, he couldn't help it. "'Vicariously'?" he suggested. 

"Yeah! That," Mikey beamed, nodding. "You get what I mean." 

"I understand." 

The conversation died off soon after as Donnie decided to get breakfast over with and do whatever needed to be done before they left for patrol that night, darkness falling earlier due to the upcoming winter. It wasn't too cold for them to be out yet, though, so that still meant a chilly patrol in the Autumn breeze. He hated the cold. 

As Donnie was making himself busy at a circuit board in his lab, he heard the beads in the doorway shift, and to his surprise, Splinter came shuffling in. 

"Sensei?" 

He put down his soldering iron, spinning around in his chair. "Something the matter?" 

Splinter ran his fingers along a shelf on the wall as he wandered by, careful to not disturb any of the items lining it. Beakers, recently-repaired electronic parts, projects put on pause, things that would loathe to be broken. 

"There is always something," Splinter replied enigmatically, "I would not be here if that weren't true. Would you agree?"

 I'm compromised!

Donnie had a strong but hidden dislike for vague speaking, even if he did it himself sometimes. When spoken to you it's much more bothersome. 

Splinter waited for his answer, looking at him expectantly. "Donatello?" 

"Yeah, um…yes, I would—I would agree. I suppose. So...what is it again?" Damn his stutter, he couldn't get away with anything, hardly. He was only able to stifle it just enough. 

Picking a random pipette on the desk next to Donnie, Splinter studied the green liquid close for a second before his nose twitched, and he put it back down. "You have been very busy lately, it seems. What is it that you work on all day in here? Or are you playing games?" 

Donnie's heart thumped. His hand found that particular spot on his neck and began to scratch, and Splinter looked at him dead in the eye. He should have known; there was no hiding anything from their father, he was too good. Stupidly, infuriatingly perceptive. Donnie caught himself scratching that spot and slid his hand away, he hadn't even noticed he was picking at it again. He knows, Mikey told him, I probably look like a guilty idiot right now, I'm—

"I haven't been playing games," Donnie blurted out. 

Quizzically, Splinter gestured at the computer screen on the other wall, which had the menu of the game he'd opened up just earlier. Reminiscing over it even though it had been only a couple of days since he and his friend had last played together, but he stared at the screen as if it had been years. It made him realize how easily he'd gotten attached to that. Well, to her. He was on the fence about whether he wanted to try playing again or not and left it on.

Oh, you have to be kidding. I'm a fool in a man's shoes. 

Donnie laughed uncomfortably, "You caught me, Sensei," he said, "I guess I have been playing games more often lately." 

It was honest enough, right? 

Splinter hummed and cupped his hands behind his back. "I see."

Straightening out, Donnie dipped his head a little. "I'll...lay off on them. Sorry for lying. I've just been really distracted recently." 

"Liars never prosper, my son. Take care of yourself." 

He then left. 

So he didn't know. Donnie still couldn't say it with any degree of confidence, because Splinter would trip them up here and there, but it was assurance enough to know that if Splinter was aware of what had gone on between the four brothers and his new—rather, former—human friend, he would have confronted Donnie about it. Or all of them, considering it was now a secret they were all in on actively hiding. And on top of that, Raph and Leo didn't know Mikey was conspiring. Layers and layers, he sighed. 

With Splinter gone, he let out a breath of relief. Too close. Much. But, swiftly evaded. A chuckle left him, not of humor, but more because he was actually feeling a little confident. Just a little. They were really hiding something from Splinter; it was reason enough to pat himself on the back, nothing got past Splinter. Except for him.

Briefly, he thought of Mikey's outlandish idea as he spun back around in his chair. "Mikey, you are crazy," he mumbled to himself as he took his soldering iron, resuming his work from before. "But..."

Chapter 5

[linkspooky]

Mahito = True Human

A while back I sent an anon to @kaibutsushidousha​ asking if there was any deeper meaning to the Kanji in Mahito’s name. It turns out that his name has a lot of significance to his character and also his role in the story. I’ll be going over the symbolic meaning of his name below.  [Original post by [x], coloring by [x].]

To quote. 

Mahito’s name means “true human”. Even without getting to significance of this expression to Japanese and Chinese cultures, that’s already a bold and interesting name choice, seeing that, [...] he’s implied to be not a person, but some sort of incarnated curse, working together with curse spirits interested in becoming the new form of humanity. 

There’s a certain irony in Mahito’s name being read as  真人 “True Human” considering what we know of him he has an extremely low opinion of humans, and a high opinion of curses. In the latest fight against Yuji in the Shibuya arc, Mahito seems to be seeking to shed his more humanlike form like shedding his skin so he can become even more of what he considers to be a “true curse.” 

Mahito’s name means true human, and he is the most humanlike of all of the intelligent curses before him and yet he seems to want nothing to do with humanity, preferring to see himself as a curse instead. He even quite literally, as I mentioned above, sheds off his own skin in order to try and take what he assumes is his true form. 

Mahito’s name means true human and yet he doesn’t want to become humans. He always encourages the curses around him to act more like curses, acting illogical and on impulse. 

Mahito wants to become a “true curse” the most curselike of the curses. Rather than becoming human literally, they wanted to replace the humans entirely. Mahito is a human curse, created by the hatred spewed between humans and yet not only wants to destroy humans but is also the one most eager to destroy his reflection Itadori Yuji even though he claimed they were “the same person.” There’s a certain irony in naming Mahito “True Human” when he’s constantly trying to prove that he’s anything but human. 

But anyways, let’s get to what Asian traditions define as “true human”.

Starting off with Japanese history/Shintoism. In the year 684, Emperor Tenmu defined that the largest families in Japan needed to have rank attached to their family names as a way of easily expressing their social status. The eight social ranks defined by Emperor Tenmu, from the noblest to the most plebian were:

1 - Mahito (True humans) 2 - Ason (Courtiers) 3 - Sukune (Lords) 4 - Imiki (People from overseas, especially from China and Korea, who settled in early Japan and introduced Continental culture to the Japanese) 5 - Michinoshi (Artist and priest families) 6 - Omi (Retainers) 7 - Muraji (Families big and influential enough to earn a rank but not falling into any other category) 8 - Inagi (Families of regional officials responsible for rice storage)

The title of Mahito was granted only to families descended from Emperors themselves or imperial princes. Basically, only those of royal blood could be called “true humans”.

The connection to Asian traditions is clear in Mahito’s naming. Mahito is the closest thing possible to curse royalty among the curse family. He was the one set up to take leadership of the rest of the curses even after Jogo, Hanami and Dagon passed. 

Mahito is also, a curse that’s been paralleled to Sukuna the so called “king of curses” several times. Mahito even presumes that they’re something like rivals. It’s probably no coincidence that lords were known as “Sukune”.

The irony of naming Mahito true human also repeats again. Mahito wants to prove he’s the most “Pureblooded” of the curses by constantly exaggerating his own curse nature, hating, and spiting others for no reason. However, he’s the most humanlike instead. Mahito is said to serve out the purpose as a mirror to humanity. “Death is a mirror for humans”, he said that in the sense that people become more self-reflective when facing death, and also the idea of mortality for humans tends to make people more eager to define who they are.

 We see are lives in sharp relief and are constantly trying to define ourselves, because we have to face death. Mahito is much like that. He’s made up of human fears. Human insecurities. Human hate. The fear of other people. However, that makes him a mirror because he shows humans their own flaws. In other words Mahito regards himself as a pure blooded curse and nothing more, but Mahito more than any of the curses reflects humanity. It’s even what he does to Yuji. When Mahito and Yuji fight he tries to force the others into self reflection. 

All of Mahito’s negative qualities, those are human qualities too. Mahito hates humans, but humans also despise each other. Mahito acts like a coward, but there are plenty of people who are cowards. Mahito is reflecting the worst traits of humanity and bringing them face to face, and thus acting like a mirror. We even see Mahito acting like a mirror. When he kills Nanami, in the few moments before Nanami dies, he doesn’t see Mahito standing right in front of him. 

He sees Haibara. When looking at Mahito, he saw his old dead friend. Mahito was serving as a mirror for what Nanami’s thoughts at the time. No matter what Mahito strives to become as a true curse, he’ll always be a reflection of humanity because he was created by human feelings, and human projections. 

Which is probably why Mahito strives to transform himself and find his true form in the first place, because he is as of right now, just a monster stitched together of other human beings with no true form, and no true purpose. 

Next up, let’s talk about Taoism. The main gist of Taoism is that some people are randomly born with sacral bones in their skeletons. Sacral bones can sometimes run in the family, but can also occur in random people with no taoist heritage, regardless of class. Peole with sacral bones can seclude themselves taoist communities in isolated mountains or islands, becoming Taoists, the students of Xian arts. Xian is a title granted to a Taoist who completed their studies, turning immortal in the process.

In Taoism, Yuanshi Tianzun is the greatest being in all universe, with the Xians who serve Yuanshi Tianzun being considered good, and the Xians who oppose him being considered evil. Zhenren (”true human” in Chinese) is the name granted to the greatest Xian wizards serving under Yuanshi Tianzun. The Xians chosen as Zhenrens are people who transcended the everyday world, and reached the peak of the Tao arts.

One Taoist named Zhuang Zi made immense contribution to making the Taoist knowledge widespread by writing a book also named Zhuang Zi. In his self-title book, Zhuang Zi defines a “true human” as person who mastered the Tao’s ideals, or more specifically, “a person who meekly obeys the heaven’s decree, accepts everything as natural, lets go of all prejudice and confrontationism, and lives under the taoist mindset that all things are of equal value”.

The process of Sacral bones resembles Jujutsu Sorcerery technique heritage a lot, but besides that there’s a lot of resemblance between Tao’s ideals and Mahito’s own ideals. Specifically about the equality of life. 

Mahito seeslife as something without necessary meaning or value. Life simply circles. The life of a butterfly or an ant is just as important as the life of a human being. In a world where everything is just trying to survive and live to the next today, it might just be human folly to assume we’re somehow outside of the food chain of the planet we share with all other life.  You could take “All life is equal” to mean two things, all life is equally precious, or all life is equally worthless. Guess which one Mahito takes. 

A taoist accepts everything as natural, and Mahito seems to submit himself to natural law. He calls the three curse spirits which are basically just nature spirits to be his closest friends. Jogo, Hanami, Dagon, they’re all just representative of the naural world around them. 

Mahito also describes life as just one more facet of nature. 

All life is equal. All life is the same. All life is equally worthless. A wolf killing a rabbit isn’t cruel. If the wolf doesn’t kill the rabbit they’ll starve. If the rabbit escapes they’ll live to the next day. If it doesn’t the wolf does. Everything in this world is just trying to live - which is why Mahito doesn’t see the battle between curses and humans as a battle between good and evil.  Curses are trying to replace humans, so they can live freely in the world the same way humans do.

It’s a battle for survival. There’s no good or evil between the wolf and the rabbit, both of them are just fighting each other in order to survive. However, if Mahito really wants to follow natural laws that means he’s also a part of the same nature. 

There’s a flaw in Mahito’s thinking. He decries humans for being self important, and reasoning that they’re somehow more worthy of life than other animals or even curses. Mahito believes that if he’s stronger than Yuji, he should have the right to kill him in order so that he can live. However, Mahito doesn’t handle it very well when he’s on the other side. Might makes right, is a logic that means whenever you’re stronger, what you think is the right thing. However, what most don’t consider is that if you’re weak it also means you have to submit to somebody else. 

Mahito never even considered the idea that he might be the prey. His logic is all might makes right, the stronger person has to live, but he also assumed he’d be the stronger one. When it turns out he’s weaker, and he’s the one whose about to die, he ends up running for his life. Despite basically justifying himself and doing whatever he wanted when he was on top, he can’t handle being at the bottom of the food chain, he can’t submit to being weak. Which is why we see his sudden panic when he realizes he’s the prey this time. This is also, something that contradicts what Jogo says. 

Curses do not fear death. However, Mahito does. Which means in this moment as he’s running away, Mahito is acting more like a human than a curse. He assumed his life was more important in the grand scheme of things, just like humans have a tendency to do, and doesn’t want to be eaten like a rabbit so Yuji can survive to the next day. 

Last but not least, Buddhism defines “true human” as a person who opened their eyes to the Truth and perfected their personhood. Both Buddhas and Arhats qualify as “true humans” by that definition. Gojou is another character with heavy Buddhist motifs on his name...

This could be a connection with two ideas in Mahito’s character. Number one, he’s always trying to perfect himself and lift himself up to the highest level possible. His Domain is even called “Self Embodiment of Perfection.” You get the sense that in tinkering with others, distorting the shape and form of others he’s trying to find the true perfect shape of himself. 

The second is his connection to Gojo. This is also just a theory as we don’t know exactly what the six-eyes do, but it’s heavily suggested that both Mahito and Gojo are able to see both the “soul” something that is impossible for all other curses and jujutsu sorcerers to do. 

Mahito’s able to see the soul most likely just because of what he is, a reflection of humans, and how his cursed technique resolves around warping the shape of the soul in order to change the body. Gojo is at least able to see Geto’s cursed energy with his six eyes, when he’s replaced by Getwo. The two of them have special insight to the soul that no other characters have thus they are “true seeing” in a budhist sense. They are also both characters trying to perfect their personhood, Gojo is the ideal jujutsu sorcerer and Mahito longs to be the ideal curse. 

So, there’s a lot of connections to asian traditions present in naming Mahito “True Human”, but there’s also a lot of ironies too. Mahito as always is a walking contradiction, and that quality of his is what makes him all the more human. 

[c-sand]

I’ll never get over that one of the biggest crimes Game of Thrones ever committed was constantly having Sansa Stark saying bad/self deprecating things about herself throughout the series, especially as we started to get towards the ending seasons. She’s a slow learner. She’s stupid. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about. She needed to be emotionally and sexually abused by all of the evil nasty men she was surrounded by in order to become a ‘strong woman’ instead of the child everyone starts out as. She never learns.

It’s true that Sansa, herself, may be thinking these things about herself. She’s been living in a constant state of fear and danger. She’s been emotionally and sexually used and abused and groomed for years. She’s been beaten and humiliated and sold. She’s been tricked and manipulated, as a pawn, to suit eight million different people’s wills and desires. She’s been looked down upon by basically every person she encounters, who all act like the things she’s saying are as true as the sky being blue -- even though we (as a Non-Sansa-Hating audience, at least), know she’s actually extremely smart and underestimated by the people around her. 

At the front half of the show, when Sansa has lines about how she feels she’s a stupid, slow learning, idiot, fantasy filled child who’s at fault for everything that’s gone wrong, it feels authentic -- for whichever reason she’s saying it, it feels authentic. Whether she’s saying those things about herself, because she’s feeling those things about herself, or because she’s caught in a life or death moment and she’s pleading with the person who’s trying to toss her off a mountain that’s she she’s too dumb to work against them or be any sort of threat, at all. When she talks about being a stupid little bird, even though I hate watching my girl say those things about herself, it feels (whether it’s internal emotion or outward survival) like actual characterization in that moment. 

But, it stops being about that somewhere in the middle. Those lines are no longer about Sansa, as a character, functioning in this world with actual feelings and thoughts. She’s no longer saying what needs to be said in order to make the people around her think she’s incapable. She’s no longer saying what she might emotionally feel in her heart are her own flaws. Those lines are no longer about serving to tell a story with Sansa and for Sansa.

Those lines are about serving to tell a story with and for the audience. The audience who HATE her, because Ned f’d up and because she yelled at Arya a couple of times while Arya yelled back.

Those lines turn into weapons against her in order to *wink wink nudge nudge* at the audience who hates this girl, for no good reason. To say, “Ha, Sansa Stark is the WORST, am I right? lolz don’t worry guys, we know and so does she.” Those lines exist to try and frame her every action, her every sentence, her every moment of having the audacity to draw breath in a room of fan favorite characters, as a springboard for the audience to viscously attack her and undermine the things she does and the moves she makes. They’re lines of permission given to spew unnecessary bile towards her. “You can cheer for her rape and root for her death, even though she legitimately is not at fault for a single thing that’s gone wrong (as if that would make those things justified) don’t worry. Even SHE hates herself! Let’s all hate her together!”

And it’s truly one of the worst things this show did. 

They had this girl (this super smart girl, who was truly one of the best players in the game from the very start) (Sansa Stark is such a good player of the game that she convinced the majority of the audience, FOR NO REASON, up until the very end, that she was Cerse 2.0. FOR NO REASON) (oop she said she learned a lot from Cersei! Sansa’s obviously PLOTTING A TAKEOVER FROM JON!!!) say that she knew she was a slow learning dumbo who takes forever to learn a lesson (she’s not and she doesn’t), while she’s simultaneously taking down the man who orchestrated the entire war. They tried to imply (and blah blah deleted scene) that Sansa was being fooled by Petyr Finger and blah blah. But, Sansa isn’t stupid and hasn’t trusted Petyr Finger for so beyond long. She didn’t even trust him at the Vale, before Ramsay. She didn’t save him there because she was whipped for him and thought he was a miracle, she saved him because he was at least a variable that she felt she understood the desires of -- whereas she didn’t know the people in the Vale, at all -- didn’t know what they would do to her, after they took care of him. And she did, really, know his desires. She just didn’t know what he’d do with those desires and what’d he’d do to her in order to get these desires met.

That line doesn’t exist to show how she’s grown. It’s not a power line in a scene where she tries one of her and her families greatest threats, for the crimes he’s committed. It’s not about her, at all. It’s a buffer for the audience to laugh about how she’s been useless this entire time, even though she hasn’t been. It’s a buffer for the audience to say she finally learned the truth about the people around her and stopped being a fool, even though she actually learned that in season one and has been playing a part ever since.

They had this girl sit down with one of her many tormenters (The Hound saving her a couple of times does not erase that he literally walks around tormenting her) (his desire for her is extremely apparent, as is his constantly backing her into corners and purposefully scaring her, speaking very sexually violent towards her -- don’t even get me started on the ‘broken in’ line) and say that she needed to be abused, beaten, and raped to grow from the little bird she was into the woman she is today. As if something about that is an empowering statement. 

That line doesn’t exist to say, “LOok how stRonG shE iS now!!” It exists to say, “Sansa Stark was a bad and weak child, you’re right audience. She needed to be taught a lesson, she needed be broken, by bad men, to be worth anything. We’ve made her worth something, you’re welcome.”

ect. ect. ect.

The only time in the back half of this show that Sansa was allowed to do anything without having a line making sure to bookend that she’s weak and stupid, but somehow she’s managed to make it here bravo you did it gold star, is when she gets to kill Ramsay after the battle. And the only reason that there isn’t one there, is because they probably knew they could get away with not having to make sure to give a *wink wink* excuse as to why she could possibly be doing something worthwhile in the scene. Everyone hates Ramsay, they’re just going to be so thrilled that he’s dying and that’s she’s killing him with his own dogs, that’s she actually allowed to just exist within the scene without some meta line about how she was dumb for ever getting (being forced) into a situation where she was marrying him, to begin with. She was just allowed to take out her abuser, because they knew you were going to be cheering it on. 

They don’t have to soften the “blow” that it’s crappy useless Sansa doing it, because everyone can look past their hate of Sansa to cheer on their hate of Ramsay.

And gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!! It’s just one of the greatest crimes from Game of Thrones. That they stopped letting Sansa be an actual character with actual story and actual emotions. And they instead made her a sound board of lines for the audience to try and, like, justify her existence. “She’s bumbling through, guys. She’s so stupid, she made it here by dumb luck. You’re all right, you’re so smart. Unlike her. This dumbo.”

We’re so lucky that Sansa is obviously a pivotal character otherwise, based on how often they have her talk her own character down, they probably would’ve just killed her off. Thank god George must’ve been like, “Listen you idiots, here’s my list of ending things, she ends up Queen in the North, you can’t just off her.”

But, boy oh boy did they seemingly retaliate with the next best thing -- having her rip her own self apart every chance they can reasonably get.