#and then i got a nintendo dsi i think? for christmas

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

i always find it funny when i see people try to put clear yearly boundaries on generations because like, half the time my brother and i are in different generations despite being two years apart and having very much the same experience generation-wise.

its even funnier when im the gen z and hes the millennial when hes the one who uses tiktok daily and im the one who wouldnt touch that app with a 100ft pole wearing a hazmat suit

[toyota-supra]

for context, I did have a lot of consoles throughout my life bc as I've said video games pretty much are my life but they were:

Mega Drive 3 or whatever its called yknow one of those TecToy things that comes with games already in it - older cousin didn't want it anymore

Polystation (famiclone) - 1980's console sold in the 2000's yeah this was probably like 10 dollars. we gave it away eventually. my parents barely remember that we had this but if there's something I don't forget it's video games

PlayStation 2 Slim - cheapest version of the PS2 you could get at the time when the PS3 was already out. I think my parents divided the cost with someone else in the family. we pirated all our games.

black Nintendo DSi - my mom asked a friend of hers who was visiting the US to get it there cheaper and she'd pay it back. I was disappointed to find that every other kid on the planet had a DSi XL instead which deeply insulted me because 90% of them stopped playing with the thing as soon as it wasn't cool anymore and my hands grew to be larger than average so I kind of needed that. I pirated all my games.

normal white Nintendo Wii - I don't remember how many years after the console's release this was but it was a standard Wii. my uncle who doesn't live here happened to have bought this in fucking Syngapore and gave it to us. yes that means it used PAL games. in a region that only sold NTSC games. we pirated all our games except for the Wii Sports and Wii Play discs that came with the console and the second controller respectively

normal 8GB storage release year Wii U (as opposed to the 32GB black one that actually came with a game already) - my parents divided the cost with another family member and bought it for me on the christmas of the year that thing released because I really really really begged them so I could play Smash 4. I didn't know how to mod a Wii U, so this was my first console with original games. I had to wait a month or two after I got it to actually have something to play though, since they couldn't afford it. I don't regret wanting a Wii U, all things considered

release year Nintendo Switch with the red and blue joycons - I got this used from a colleague in late 2022 (nearly 6 years after it came out) because of how expensive this shit is. the joycons were brand new due to stick drift replacements. I got a few games since then and found out that I actually don't like this thing at all it feels so bad to play in any form possible and every game is like 300 bucks

besides that I would play stuff on old used laptops or whatever we could get emulators running on. always keep gaming and buy a ps vita for me if you can

[angel-of-death-2015]

for the ask game! what's your favorite album from 2000's? your favourite video game console? your favourite dessert? 😄 ❤️

send me "what's your favorite.." asks 💫

Favorite album from the 2000s?

Gotta go with Corinne Bailey Rae's self-titled album. It's an entire masterpiece about love, heartbreak, and self-love as a black girl. It's the perfect album to play in the spring and summer on a sunny day 🥺💖💕

Favorite video game console?

The OG Playstation! I remember my dad getting that console when I was a kid! It's what started the spark of my love of games! 🥺 My brother and I used to watch dad play Crash Team Racing while we eat pizza on a Friday night after watching Cartoon-Cartoon Fridays on Cartoon Network 🥺 We ended up losing it on accident when we had to move 😞

The Gamecube! That's when I REALLY began playing games! Inwas introduced to the Gamecube when I was nine and visiting my dad across the country! My brother and I got to play dad's friend's Gamecube while dad's friend's family were on vacation. The very first game we played was Sonic Adventure 2! Then dad and I would stay up late playing Mario Party 7 against each other 😂 These two games pushed me to find my love of video games and for Sonic! 🥺💖💕

The Wii! Dad got it for my brother and I we've played MANY games with it! On Saturday mornings, my brother and I would get up early to watch our cartoons first and then we'd turn on the Wii! I'd be eating my cereal while watching my brother play Sonic and the Secret Rings! Surprisingly, no televisions were harmed by the remortes 💀

The Nintendo DS! Fun fact: I actually had five of them 💀💀💀💀 The first two were pink but they both broke 😭 My brother and an old friend used an actual pen for the touch screen and scratched it. They messed it up and I couldn't play certain games on it 😭 The second one was actually my fault 💀 I bent the top screen back too far on accident. I don't know my own strength 😭 The third one was black and red! I called it a cherry coke 😂 I honestly just don't remember what happened with this one! I think it got traded in so I can get the DSi with a camera for Christmas! And my brother gave me his DSi XL because he got a PSP 💀 I still have a lot of the games I play with the DSi! I just have to be in a mood to play them!

Favorite dessert?

Baked chocolate chip cookies

My homemade chocolate chunk brownies 😌

Kit Kats

Ice cream sandwiches

[dezzytheantonioguy]

About Myself

Hey. My name is Dezzy Antonio. You can call me Dez or Des, whichever one you prefer. My pronouns are He/They. I'm into (somewhat) multiple fandoms that are listed further down below. I'm also an Autistic Pansexual dude.

Friend Codes:

Now, keep in mind that I'm not going to accept your friend code right away. It's either because my friend list is full, I'm busy af, or I'm just not interested in adding you.

- (Nintendo Switch Friend Code: 3639-7678-5864)

- (Mario Kart Tour ID: ||Although, I rarely play that game, so don't be surprise if I don't add you in the next decade or two.|| 1813 5622 5824)

- (Wii U Nintendo Network ID: JustDanceDezzy16 ||Well, since the online service on the Wii U is shut down and replaced by Pretendo, why even bother adding this ID 🙃. Unless you don't have a modded Wii U.||)

- (Pretendo Network ID: DezzytheAntonio ||Unless you have Pretendo installed on your modded Wii U, add this one instead of the NNID one. You have to create a separate account to uae Pretendo.||)

- (Ubisoft Username: DesmondMyle2018 ||This is for people who want to play Multi-player with me on JD 2023/2024 Edition.||)

Games that I (usually) play:

- Mii Games (Wii Sports, Wii Party, Wii Party U, Wii Play, etc.)

- Mario Games (Mario Kart, Mario Party, Super Smash Bros., etc.)

- Just Dance (All Games)

- Sonic Games (Sonic Unleashed, Sonic Generations,

- Animal Crossing (Though, I mostly play New Horizon because it was a huge hit around the time. I think we all know why.)

- Splatoon (I only played the first Splatoon, though. Mainly because of my modded Wii U. I do want to play 2 and 3, but I don't have any money to get them. I'm broke AF.)

My other social medias:

- YouTube Channel: DezzytheMaker

- Instagram: justadanceboy

- Deviantart: DezzyAntonio

- Twitch: dezzyantonio

Interesting stuff about myself:

- I draw art from time to time. If you want to use my art, then fine, I don't care. But PLEASE GIVE ME CREDIT AND DON'T STEAL IT! I DON'T TOLORATE ART THEFT SHIT! Also, I do take requests, but if I do request, be fucking patient with me, alright?

- Now, yes, most of the art I post on here is from other inspirations. However, I would never plagiarize or steal some else's work for my benefit.

- I'm a busy man outside of social media. So, I'd I don't respond to you right away, I'm either inactive, busy as hell, or am not in the mood to talk. So, don't spam the same crappy bullshit and flood my DMs with nonsense.

- I am a lore fanatic. Hence, the majority of the Miis have inspirational headcanons from other video game lore (mainly from Just Dance, though).

- I am a Linkin Park fan boy. Yeah, I'm not ashamed to admit that.

- If you're that nosey/snoopy about what I posted in the past, keep in mind that I was very immature and a little cringe. What did you expect? I was a teenager who didn't know any better.

- I admit that I am a bit sensitive at times, especially when it comes to having dark topics that are traumatic to me. So, if I do or say something that upsets or makes you uncomfortable you in any way, I extremely apologize for that.

- The first Nintendo console that I played was the Nintendo DSi. After that, I played the Nintendo Wii, and the first game I played on there was Wii Sports (Yeah, I know, a shocker, huh?)

- I got a Nintendo Switch on Christmas Eve in 2017.

- I got my first (personal) Wii U console on Christmas in 2019.

- As of today, I got a Wii/Wii U and a Nintendo Switch.

- As it was obvious enough, I do have a modded Wii U, and I use Aroma Environment. You can thank my Wii U not wanting to read my Wii Party U disc for some reason. It still can't read it to this day, and I'm still trying to figure out why. Whatever, I have a modded Wii U now. Yay!

- If you've been in the Mii community long enough, I'm sure most of you heard about "Mii Olympics." Let me just say that I'm the one that came up with the fanmade title. Key word: FANMADE. Meaning that it's fanon and not real. I do have a Wiki dedicated to them. Just search up "Mii Olympics Wiki," and it should be the first result you'll see. All characters relevant to that game belong to me.

- Speaking of the Mii Olympics Miis, I don't have a problem with you hating on my custom CPUs or whatever, but DON'T do any horrific shit towards them. That means doing anything sexual or any dark messed up content towards them.

Alright. And that's pretty much it. Hope you guys have a good rest of your day and... Here's my Mii, lol. (DON'T YOU FRICKING DARE SAY MY MII LOOKS LIKE BO-JIA!)

[leahcee]

a depressing story time for you today bc I’ve been thinking a lot these past two days.

When I was 9 I really wanted a hot pink Nintendo dsi for Christmas. I wrote a letter to Santa and all, thats the only thing I wanted. Come Christmas Eve 2009 I was crying to my mom about how I wanted it so badly. It got to the point where she was so irritated and over my crying that she yelled at me that Santa wasn’t real and that she was actually the one who got gifts every year. And of course I began crying even harder. Then she proceeded to take me with her to target or walmart and bought a fucking hot pink nintendo dsi and I remember being so happy and hopeful and I was like you’re buying it for me!?? And she was like no it’s for your step sister. And I started silently crying in the middle of the store bc I didn’t wanna get my ass whooped and also bc eldest daughter so I can’t make a fool out of my family in public ya know? Anyways when I got to open my gift at midnight it was the hot pink Nintendo dsi that I had been crying over and my mom said she had to lie to me so I’d be surprised. Anyways, merry Christmas 🥳🎄🎁

[grad604-haydenmiddleton]

20 OBJECTS WRITING PT.1

1. WHAT IS THE ITEM?

2. WHERE DID YOU GET THE ITEM FROM?

3. WHY IS THE ITEM SIGNIFICANT TO YOU?

4. HOW IS THE ITEM SIGNIFICANT TO YOUR CREATIVITY?

Testosterone

This is my medical prescription for testosterone. I go in every 3 weeks for an injection of this stuff. It took a lot of time to get to this point in my life but I can confidently say it has made me a happier more confident person to finally feel like I’m comfortable in my own skin. My gender is an extremely important part of me as it is for anyone, cis or not it’s important for us as people to express ourselves authentically to be perceived how we want to be and when someone misunderstands you it can be uncomfortable. Before in my creative process a lot of my art and work was fuelled by sadness, anger and confusion and although some might say I created my best work during those times of emotional high now I work with more thought, care and consideration.

Wacom

I got my first Wacom tablet when I was around 12 after borrowing my sisters one far too much. Weirdly enough, I wasn’t a fan of physically sketching before this and was much more drawn to digital art and the effects and style with this medium, even now I’m actually a horrible physical artists despite all my time spent drawing digitally. Being apart of these digital art and design communities helped me improve and be inspired. This was the first step in taking me down the path of graphic design and helped me realise what I wanted to do for work later in the life.

Converse

I wore fake kmart converse hundreds of times before finally investing in an actual pair of REAL converse and now I think I wear them every single day. I got them at my mums insistence since I think she was sick of me getting blisters with the ill fitting dupe. I am really a comfort over style person and although I like the converse style I know there are plenty of other stylish shoes out there but the converse work for me and make it easy to pick what I’m going to wear into uni or go out for a walk in. These converse have taken me plenty of places and I even got a second pair for my birthday thanks to my nana. Shoes are extremely important to see the world in and to take in inspiration from the world around me for my creative practice.

Ticket receipts

Here are some of the ticket stubs or receipts I’ve collected from going to shows. I keep these to preserve the memory of going out with friends or family to watch something. My favourite are plays and then also animated films, some may think it’s childish for me to still be so invested in colourful movies typically catered towards kids or teens but I really enjoy taking in the art and beauty of animation as inspiration for my own bright and bold creative style which also then in turn influences my graphic design practice. It’s also just a fun experience, I love going to the theatre and it makes the whole movie experience really engaging and immersive as I’m someone who actually has a very bad attention span for movies if I’m just watching it at home for example.

3DS + DS

The DSi was my the first ever gaming console, I got it for Christmas one year from my nana when I was around 7. This began my love for Nintendo and video games in general. I played a lot of Zelda Four Swords and Animal Crossing: Wild World with my sister and then other niche games geared towards kids like Littlest Pet Shop, Petz, Nintendogs and others. But it is whenever I played with my sister that I remember most and hold closest to my heart. Video games are such a creatively stunning work of love from the graphics to the music to the story they tell and in a way it’s very similar and goes hand in hand with graphic design as they communicate a story visually and through a specific creative style.

Sticker Collection

If some of my choices of objects don’t make it obvious enough, I’m a bit of a collector and my stack of sticker sheets is further proof. I have tons of stickers which I’ve collected over the years from a range of places like online artist stores, stationary stores and artist alley stalls from overload or Armageddon. But for someone who buys heaps of stickers too I actually get really nervous actually using them, I want to keep all of them nice forever and when I do put a sticker on something all I can think of is how it’ll most likely eventually fall or scratch off or even get UV damage from the sun and the colours won’t be as bright as they originally were. I’m a bad hoarder and need to get better at using some of these things up, but for now I will enjoy keeping them altogether in a box for safe keeping and for me to admire. Since a lot of the stickers are made by artists they inspire me a lot and often they’re made as merch for a show or cartoon I watch. For a long time it was always my dream to sell things like stickers myself and maybe one day I will get to that point too.

Pokémon Cards

Despite actually finding a lot of the games boring I have spent a crazy amount of money on my Pokémon card collection. But for me it isn’t about pulling the crazy rare and expensive cards (although I do have a few pricey ones in my collection), for me it’s all about collecting the pretty cards or cards I find visually appealing. There are hundreds of different artists working for Pokémon and so each card is personalised and has its own style. There is a specific card artist, Yuka Morii, who specifically does clay models of the Pokémon and for me, despite her cards usually being common cards, are some of the coolest ones to get. I think collecting them now as an adult is a way to appease my child self who always wanted to get Pokémon cards but I was told I couldn’t because they were a waste of money and I agree with this sentiment but at the end of the day I’m a person who just enjoys things and collectables and so collecting these bring me joy.

Burts Bees

Lip balm might be a weird inclusion to a group of objects that is supposed to be related to my creative process, but hear me out. I use to not take good care of my body at all, I was really depressed for a long time and the way I lived didn’t help this either, I wouldn’t sleep, eat or drink well. I’m not sure when it happened exactly but at some point I realised I needed to make changes. I set up a routine for my life including a wake up and going to sleep routine which helped things slightly, I was still depressed which sucked since I was actively trying to get better now but I think learning to have a routine and self awareness about what my body and mind needed is a hugely important skill which I still have today. Lip balm is just a representation of the changes and routine I made, after brushing my teeth at night and in the morning I drink a large glass of water and always apply lip balm, being hydrated is one of the many things I think is important for my body. It’s also something a little self indulgent and perhaps falls under the self care umbrella of things to do but it’s a small thing that brings joy and at the end of the day that is important to me, my mental health and then in turn, my creative process.

Washi Tape

Another stack of items that relates to my obsession to collect cute things is washi tape. This is a staple at a lot of stationary shops and I use to go a lot with my sister to check them out. She has always been a lot more careful with her money and me, not so much. I cant handle the temptation and usually always leave a stationary shop with something. I’ve always had the idea of doing a bullet journal, dairy or some kind of scrap book and I try to convince myself that is why I have a stupid amount of washi tape and other kinds of stationary but then I’ve tried to start these things up and always fail miserably due to a lack of patience and discipline to sit down and add to a journal everyday and decorate it with all my things. And yet I still collect washi tape, it’s just something cheap and cute that brings joy. I also think the aesthetics and patterns of washi tape inspire some of my brightly coloured art ideas and sometimes I even digitally draw washi tape to emulate physical craft style.

Tote Bags

Tote bags are another thing I started using after witnessing my sister style them. Since shes my older sister its easy to look up to her and think that everything she does is super cool and high fashion and so when she went to uni with one I also decided that a tote bag for uni would be cool and convenient. In actuality it really hurt my left shoulder and was really inconvenient to rummage around in to find what I was looking for. I still have a considerable collection of them though because I do think it adds to an outfit in a way that is more stylish than just a basic bag so although it doesn’t work for uni or when I have to carry a ton of stuff, It’s still a staple in my wardrobe. I also think its an artist or designer staple too, it’s perhaps a cliche but you’ll typically see a tote bag as a creatives bag of choice and so I guess I’m just doing my duty as a designer.

[rageracer-g]

Panties for Christmas 😠

So you know how your parents buy you clothes for Christmas, and you’re feeling kinda sad because you didn’t get that sweet sweet Nintendo DSi XL or Xbox game like you’ve been asking for? Well it seems the suffering never stops.

Me and my girlfriend have been apart for a while during this pandemic to keep each other safe, though we still keep in contact. I remember telling hew how much I wanted a Nintendo switch and how awesome it would be to have one for months now. We’ve bought each other Christmas and she tells me that she opens hers and is very happy and excited that she got the new purse and massive box of chocolates that she absolutely LOVES. She couldn’t stop thanking me for it. Then it came time for me to open my present, so I text her and tell her that I’m going to open it, she replies with a winky face emoticon “;)”. I grab the present, it’s kind of small, but also soft. The smile on my face goes to a neutral look of curiosity, though I try to stay happy. I take off the wrapping paper and take out the present. You know what she got me? Panties... She sent me her bra and panties for Chrsitmas. I text her asking if her underwear was my present, she said it is and that they’re soiled and she hopes I like it.

.... WHY!? I TOLD YOU SO MANY TIMES I WANTED THAT NINTENDO SWITCH SO MANY FREAKING TIMES!! HOW CAN YOU NOT GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL!? I’D BOUGHT YOU EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANTED ME TO BUY YOU, WHICH WAS A PURSE AND A HUGE BOX OF CHOCOLATES. BUT WHEN I ASK FOR A NINTENDO SWITCH THE ONLY THING YOU CAN DO IS TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES AND WRAP IT IN PAPER!? THAT’S STUPID! THAT’S STUPISD! THAT IS STUPID!! YOU’D HAVE TO BE THE DUMBEST, CHEAPEST, RUDEST PERSON ON THE ENTIRE EARTH TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT. JUST BUY MY A NINTENDO SWITCH! YOU KNOW PEOPLE HATE IT WHEN THEY GET CLOTHES FOR CHRISTMAS! SO WHY WOULD YOU GET ME CLOTHES!? WHY WOULD YOU GET ME CLOTHES!? YOU BOUGHT ME CLOTHES FOR CHRISTMAS! I DIDN’T EVEN BUY YOU CLOTHES FOR CHRISTMAS! IF I WANTED CLOTHES I WOULD HAVE ASKED MY MOM AND GRANDMA TO BUY ME SOMETHING, BUT AT LEAST THE CLOTHES THEY GET ME AREN’T DIRTY AND ALREADY USED. IF YOU WERE GOING TO GIVE ME CLOTHES YOU SHOULD HAVE AT LEAST WASHED THEM OR BOUGHT NEW ONES OG GOT THEM IN MY SIZE OR I DON’T KNOW... GET ME ME ACTUAL CLOTHING THAT A MALE WOULD WEAR!! YOU DISRESPECTFUL CHEAP WASTE OF TIMES, I SHOULDN’T HAVE BOUGHT YOU ANYTHING FOR CHRISTMAS, I SHOULDN’T HAVE GOTTEN YOU ANYTHING AT ALL! i SPENT HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS GETTING YOU YOUR GIFT AND YOU DIDN’T SPENT A SNINGLE SENT GETTING ME MINE. AND MAIL DELIVERY IF FREE, SO DON’T EVEN TRY TO SAY THAT YOU PAID FOR THAT!! YOU REALLY THINK I WILL PAY HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS FOR YOUR GIFT WHILE YO U PUT IT LESS THAN MIMIMAL EFFORT FOR MINE? IT TOOK ME HOURS AND DAYS TO GET YOUR PRESENT AND IT TOOK YOU MEER SECONDS TO GET MINE! <big>GIVE ME MY FREAKING NINTENTO SWITCH YOU STUPID WHORE! I WANT MY GAMING SYSTEM! BUY ME MY NINTENDO SWITCH RIGHT NOW! I TELL YOU, IF YOU DON’T BUY MY MY FREAKING NINTENDO SWITCH RIGHT NOW I’LL MAKE YOU PAY FOR IT, YOU’LL REGRET IT! BUY ME MY NINTENDO SWITCH! I WANT MY NINTENDO SWITCH! AND GO AND BUY ME SMASH BROS, MINECRAFT, AND ANIMAL CROSSING WHILE YOU’RE AT IT!!!!</big>

[jimothysomebody]

I suppose I, too, can do the 10yr photo challenge. After having deleted a previous Facebook page I'd had in favor of a new one I had a difficult time finding a good photo of me, but this will suffice. I've always enjoyed doing wild things with my hair. This was taken Christmas day, 2009. My father was in town to celebrate with Mom & I, Sally and the kids were staying at home at the time too. I believe I got a nutcracker and a few other things that year. I think it was also the Christmas that my sister very kindly got me a Nintendo DSI, which would become my favorite thing in the world until it would break a few years later. If you had asked me then and there where I'd imagine myself in 10yrs, I don't know that I would have had an answer. Despite the outward expressions of happiness, I was very much depressed, more so than ordinary for me. I could journal, I could write poetry, and when I felt the need to I could journal under the guise of poetry, but I had little imagination for much else aside from what was my routine coping mechanism of choice. Perhaps I may not have imagined being anywhere, at all. Fast forward 10yrs time. The present day photos were taken not many moments ago. I've seen, experienced and endured a lot in the last 10yrs and I am currently in a place where I would have never imagined myself being. Despite a lot, I'm doing well all things considered, all the while being nostalgic as well as thinking of all the people that are no longer here 10 years later. I've come to terms with my mental health, because I'm not ashamed, I'm not afraid, and I'm not letting the social stigma surrounding mental health bother me anymore. I've likewise come to terms with being openly bi and giving nary a fuck about it. I also bought and own my own home, at this point I've lived there 2 years and paid it off October of '18, I suppose that counts for something? There is a lot of comfort, security, and peace in my life, and there has been a fair bit of character growth and learning along the way. Let's dig this back up in another 10yrs and see where life has taken me then, shall we?

[cathartes-aurae]

some thoughts about that hoarding vs. minimalism post and even more thoughts on class in general (again lol)

my great-grandma grew up during the great depression so she was a crafty lady.  of course when i was a kid she always had extra costco hauls in the laundry room and pantry, and kept every christmas decoration she ever owned.  she wasn’t poor in her last few years but that instinct to have extras and spares stayed with her.

i’ve inherited that trait hardcore.  my parents are middle-class and my mom has always made an effort to be more minimalistic than her parents and grandparents.  but i like to save shit.  not just out of necessity, i never wanted for anything as a kid, but for memories and nostalgia.  

in 2014 me and a friend of mine went through my room together and tried to get rid of some of the stuff that i’ve accumulated.  i found myself giving away a lot of little statues that friends and family have given me as gifts, and cds that i treasured and to this day regret giving them up.  i even gave away my first nintendo dsi (instead of selling it, i’m dumb) at my friend’s suggestion because i didn’t really play video games at the time.  but GUESS WHO JUST RECENTLY GOT BACK INTO POKEMON AND ANIMAL CROSSING.  anyway.

i always think the minimalist lifestyle is nice, less chaotic but i can’t replicate it.  i have too many interests, too many feelings, and too many memories i don’t want to let go of, even if they’re bad.  my friend is from a slightly higher economic standing than i am, and minimalism always came a lot easier to them.

now that i’m almost 23 and kind of on my own, the hoarding instinct is in full force.  i hung on to sandals for 11 years because they were from my 6th grade graduation and also they were the only comfortable (durable) sandals that i had.  i have lotion, makeup and soap in my bathroom that are two years old because i don’t want to waste any of it, and it’s expensive.  i have a hard time letting go of books too cause i like to read and some of them are useful for school.  

and i oscillate between wanting to sell some of my stuff for cash and hanging on to it for the sentimental and possible future value it may have.  but also moving will be difficult.  sorry rhys lol.  

[heretic-altias]

Story Time: My first computer

[valleanenowe-dreams]

It was the day of my presentation of James Ferraro and PORTAL. I stepped up with my paper and got ready, somewhat overwhelmed. The teacher wouldn’t pull up my PowerPoint and I kept gesturing lightly and going “Umm, uhh ... Uhh” and she got really mad at me for some reason and told me to sit down and that I just wouldn’t give a presentation, and it felt really unfair, I was super upset

Walking around unfamiliar college-like corridors that looked fancy, then something about a really long classroom and some male teacher. I was there way after hours and my dad showed up to ... I don’t know, I just remember blazing afternoon lighting, holding a stack of papers in my lap. One was a test I hadn’t turned in and I wasn’t sure if the teacher would have leniency

I was driving a car at night. I was parked in the north side of an intersection, facing north. To my left was a cop car, facing south, just sitting there. The streets were otherwise empty. A bunch of roads had been blocked off for some reason, particularly northern and eastern. I think there were more cops to the east. I could “feel” that a small object I needed was lying in a road to the northeast. I had kind of a 6th sense of its exact location. I finally put the car in drive, turned around, and headed south, resolving to find a road somewhat near the object, and get out and walk to it

I was across the street from that coffee shop I’ve been posting about, but it was a bit further south on the block from its real location. There was a sticker on the wall about the new “8 inch remodel” or something. I crossed the street and went in and the place HAD been remodeled fairly extensively, bastardized from the coffee shop I always knew. Of course, I was fairly upset. There was a big enclosed cubic space in the main foyer that held a bathroom. For some reason it had a boarded up window but when I first went in it wasn’t “rendering” so for some reason I could see through to a bunch of guys queued up to use the single urinal, and I could see past the far wall down the hallway into the back foyer. Then it rendered, becoming the boarded-up window. I went to the back foyer, there was a fair amount of people sitting, and a lady on the stage was awkwardly talking about the musical acts that’d be there tonight. My dad was one of the people sitting

I was walking around fairly far south of my apartment, because I’d needed to buy something. I wandered around and came across a Little Caesar’s and, directly next door, an unfamiliar location of the pizza place my dad used to work at. The 2 owners, who I am familiar with as people, were outside. I don’t remember if I entered the pizza place or a different building, but regardless I found myself browsing a convenience-store like environment

I came across an item I think I wanted and this like, tall, kind of fat guy appeared next to me and talked about how he’d buy it for me and I think he mentioned “$400″ somehow, like he’d buy it with $400 and give me the change or something. Somehow I knew that the guy’s named was Kage. We walked up to the cashier but it’s like I was autonomously walking, like I had to. There was this strong air of this guy being really predatory and probably a pedophile

We were standing at the counter when I think some confrontational event happened that I don’t remember. Kage was gone and there was now a bunch of doorways everywhere to like, personal rooms for people. So it was like, just a weird white sterile building with a front desk now. I went over to one with 2 chairs in front of it and used a 3rd chair to barricade it shut from the outside. I creaked it open a bit and looked in

Kage and his 2 roommates were in a room that was barren concrete aside from a computer right by the door. I think there was also the frame of a bunk bed. His 2 roommates, who looked like “normal cool guys”, were at the computer. Kage was curled up in the far corner freaking out and crying. I started shouting at them all about how he was a pedophile

All the doors disappeared, making the convenience store even more a barren, white rectangular prism. No shelves or anything. There were 2 doors in one corner, I think to a “back room” and men’s bathroom. Kage kept walking between the doors. My dad was there and I guess was an employee, like with security duties, and I told him that he needed to watch out for Kage

Then I was sitting in the bathroom of my apartment pissing and the door was open and suddenly my dad’s old coworker was there and he saw me! D’oh! My dad appeared and I was doing sign language to ask him to close the door and he did once he’d figured out what I was saying

Then I was in the living room sat at our desktop computer, playing music, but my playlists were doing the weird thing where the dream is referencing really specific real-life data it doesn’t have so it’s like, “flickering” and being inconsistent. My dad’s coworker was on the couch and said the music was really crazy and cool. My dad left and the coworker stayed. I think there was this really weird uncomfortable undercurrent of one-sided sexual tension, like the coworker was attracted to me

Then I was in a house resembling the one of my former grandmother-in-law, which I used to visit in like 2009-2012, notably around Christmas. For this entire segment, someone I used to know was sitting at a table crying and I never acknowledged them. I mostly did weird spastic stuff like, this guy arrived and was walking up to the front door outside. I went into this ... Inner area of the house and stared at him with a humorously manic grin and I could see on his face he was like “Aww cool you’re here!” Then I ran off and hid in the closet of the bedroom but suddenly he was in the doorway, somehow knowing I was in there

Suddenly I was pinned face down on the floor of the house’s bathroom with a Nintendo DSi sat in front of my face and the aggressor was making me take some kind of customized test displayed on it. My left arm was free to press the buttons. Each question had 1 obviously incorrect answer which I kept picking, aggravating the person

Then I was walking around in the bedroom, which looked different, it was more tidily decorated and everything had this light purple hue to it. I was freely walking around but somehow I could tell I was still taking a test and under someone’s control. There was a timer bar ticking down on the wall and I was looking around for these little square buttons overlaid on my vision, which were associated with a new batch of objects for each stage of the test, and I just had to go up and press the buttons to acknowledge the objects I guess. Also there was this implication that the room had been remodeled by an old friend I drifted apart from

In the last stage I couldn’t find anything so I opened the closet and I found a pink shirt that had one. Then I thought I found a 2nd one but it was just the hook of a hanging bra, because if you imagine squeezing the hook of a bra between your index finger and thumb, that’s what pressing the buttons was like. I laughed but then the whole bra was inexplicably trapped under the right strap of my bra and I was embarrassed and trying to extricate it. I managed to and tossed it back in the closet

[jimothysomebody]

Christmases Past, Present, Future.

At present, it is 4.27am. I am seated downstairs on my living room couch. The room is dimly lit, illuminated by the colorful glow of my Christmas tree and the lights winding up the stairway rail. These little moments have long been my favorite. Long, quiet, pleasant moments around the tree late at night, when everyone else is asleep. I am accompanied by little else other than my thoughts, and at present... the company is good.

I've long had many pleasant memories of Christmases past. The much of the joy does seem stole away, with Dad having been gone nearly 8yrs now, but there still have been many happy occasions. I think my earliest memory of a Christmas at home is one where my parents (Dad, likely) devised some sort of bizarre hut for many of the presents, I must have been roughly 4 or 5. It was in their room, fashioned from blankets. I couldn't tell you whether they were wrapped up nicely and had already had their tags all made out, I've no idea. But eventually, Christmas morning, I vaguely remember waking everyone up super early, my older sister included, so I could have my stocking and gifts, gifts which I remember seemingly materializing, in vast multitudes, beneath our tree Christmas morning.

Another not so dissimilar time, I may have just turned 5 or 6, I remember one of the first things I opened was an insanely large box which, after leaping at it in a hyperactive fervor (likely mimicking a character from Killer Instinct in the fashion of the attack, an SNES game I was obsessed with at the time). My combo of attacks would reveal a very large wagon with easily detachable pieces. Also some of the more memorable gifts that Christmas were a massive plush Koala bear. My sister got a much larger fuzzy teddy bear with Christmas themed clothing and a hat. It was nothing personal against the very cute Koala, but I was envious of my sister. But, that envy was short lived, upon opening a big, yellow tub of Legos. I forget just how many thousand legos were in this behemoth, but they were still being found scattered throughout the home even a decade later.

The next highly memorable Christmas, for me, would have been Christmas of 2002. While the Nintendo Gamecube had already come out a year prior in 2001, I had to hear from a few friends of mine how cool it was, much to my envy. But that all changed that year. I can't remember much else from that morning, other than it being a big, bright, beautiful sunny morning, and being positively elated and shocked that we, a low income family, managed to produce a Gamecube for me, along with a 2nd 3rd party controller with interchangeable face plates. The first game I fired up was Super Mario Sunshine, which is still to this date perhaps my favorite major Mario title, perhaps due to the nostalgia factor.

There was also one other Christmas morning I remember. It was Christmas of either 08 or 09. My parents had been separated a few years at this point, and Dad was coming back into town. My older sister and her 2 kids had moved back home with Mom & I briefly. There's not much I remember getting, perhaps because of 2 things that stick out most in my memory. My sister very kindly replaced my broken Polar Ice DS Lite with sleek, new black Nintendo DSi. The other thing that shines brightly in my memory, and of course I still have, is my very regal looking nutcracker with a sword my father bought for me, which remains to this day my favorite nutcracker. I very fondly remember that morning and how together we all felt. It was very nice.

In 2010, I remember spending part of Christmas at my father's mother's house. It was a tough time, my dad being sick with cancer, but he was there, coherent, and it was nice to be able to spend time with my father & grandmother. One of the things I'd gotten from him was the 20th anniversary edition of Super Mario Allstars for the Wii, I'd also scored an early birthday gift of a neat 12MP Camera with a 4x optical zoom.

There have been Christmases that have yielded nice gifts and memories since, but for one reason or another (and I have my suspicions), the memories aren't quite as vivid, quite as strong. But still, here, in 2019, I am reflecting on Christmases past. Vividly remembering getting up at 0 dark thirty for middle school, the sidewalks often being too unshoveled and the side street we lived on often being unplowed as well as the others, my father would opt to take me to school instead of letting me walk to the nearby bus stop and freeze waiting for the bus. Fond memories of warm breakfasts, hand warmers in my pockets that lasted until 2nd or 3rd period, and just relaxing in the dim glow of the Christmas tree lights, which in my middle school years was often accompanied by the tv light of ESPN Sports Center. They were quiet, calm moments in my life to enjoy and reflect, and I seize them every opportunity I get, at least when I need them most.

It is December 8th, Christmas is in 17 days, and I am excited. I've yet to mail my holiday greeting cards out, I'm a terrible procrastinator. I have done some shopping thus far. Nothing too elegant or opulent, but things I hope my loved ones and people close to me will enjoy. In my younger years I may have very heavily dwelt on the things I desperately wanted. New video games, new consoles, new tech, clothes, whatever. As I age, I find myself not caring nearly as much. I find myself enjoying simpler things, too, increasingly even. Time spent with family and friends. Reliving memories, making new ones. Calm moments writing and journaling on the couch, next to my cat. Small gifts, things with care and thought put into them have begun to threaten (if not assume) precedence over big, flashy and fancy. Somewhere, my inner child is shocked and repulsed by this adult I've become. Not lusting after insane expensive frivolous things? What a martian!

I cannot say what Christmas future holds in store. With any luck, fond recollections, making new fond memories, time spent with loved ones, and time in the dim glow of Christmas lights, to reflect on my life, what I have, what I've lost, and what I long for, and all that I have come to cherish.