#and then i looked at my haircut before video from thursday night

[jorvikzelda]

GOD i fucking love snapchat memories, like unironically. popped me up with a mirror selfie from 3 years ago (rare, i never take selfies so it must have been a particularly vibey day) and i just looked at the photo and thought. you would have cried in the best way if you saw me now :(

[msviolacea]

A bit of random rambling about my late afternoon/evening, just life observations, nothing more. tl;dr: surprise, leaving the house sometimes is good for your mental health. Take your own damned advice every once in a while, Jaime.

We've been living in this house for more than 2 years now, but we still barely know the area. I mean, we have some good excuses given ... you know, everything, but still. And I was on the edge of mental health nonsense this morning, and thought very hard about canceling my hair appointment, but then went "for the love of fuck, Jaime, just get your fucking hair cut." And I forced myself to take a shower and put on jeans and a bra and actually GO.

Last time I needed a haircut, I found a little salon not far from here - a place in an old-school strip mall owned by one woman and her two daughters. She's from somewhere in South America, and she's the kind of cheerful stylish woman who could be anywhere between, say, 45-70 and will probably look exactly the same for those full 25 years. And thankfully, she's just the person to give my hair something that doesn't scream soccer mom. She let me sit and vibe silently while she shaved the sides of my head, and I listened to a friend of hers talk to what seemed to be a toddler niece or grandchild in Spanish on video chat.

After the haircut, I realized that a local pizza place we've ordered from via Doordash was practically next door to the salon, and it occurred to me that it's been a LONG time since I was able to just sit and read in a restaurant. That used to be one of my favorite things, before the pandemic. And so I decided to head in for dinner. It turned out to be a very nice little neighborhood-bar kind of place, with a bustling happy hour and the familiar translucent red plastic cups all pizza joints somehow have for their fountain soda. There was a band - or at least a couple of musicians - setting up a small stage in the parking lot as I was leaving. It would be a good night for it, approximately 70 degrees in a bright May sunset. I made a note to myself to see if their website shows their events. It's the kind of bar that I could see having trivia or karaoke or something.

And then I drove home, with Hope is the Thing With Feathers blasting from the speakers of our still new-ish car, through the neighborhood that still doesn't quite feel like full home yet, because we've barely ventured outside the bounds of our property since 2022. But it's a nice settled place built in the era before all houses were built to look exactly the same, an interesting array of styles and yards with fully mature trees (at least the ones that haven't been taken by emerald ash borers, like most of ours, sigh) and a heartening smattering of lawn signs calling for Minnesota to financially divest from Israel. And I thought, yeah, I'm glad this is home now.

All simple things, just a couple of hours out of a regular Thursday, but it made me feel a bit like the person I was in 2019 is still here somewhere. And it helped.

So yes. Leave the house more often, weirdo. There's life out there yet.

[revisionaryhistory]

Three Days ~ 78

~*~Sebastian~*~

The sun shone brightly when we woke up. I made Emma coffee first and we sat at the bar with fruit and yogurt. I wasn’t particularly hungry. Nauseated, if I’m honest. Emma was going home today. Yes, it was only for a couple of days, but that wasn’t what the problem was. I was afraid of how I would feel when she left. We’ve been together almost a week. We said I love you. Went to a concert with her friends, planned a vacation with mine, and celebrated a month together. Everything is wonderful. I don’t know how it will be when she leaves. Will I be melodramatically sad, anxious, and insecure that while she’s away she’ll figure out she prefers to be without me, or when she leaves will I be glad to have my space back? Realistically, the panic is more likely to come when she leaves France and we’re apart for six weeks. Today’s just a preview.

Around noon Emma was ready to leave. She’d gone through the bags of new stuff and left what she wanted to take to France. No sense packing it home only to bring it back. Especially when she was dealing with her suitcase on the train. Early afternoon was the best time to get her back. I walked her downstairs to her Uber and stopped by the security office to find out where the parking garage was. The security guard walked outside with us and pointed to a keypad on a pole next to the building. I walked into the building hundreds of times and never really noticed the large panes of windows that matched my building was a garage door. The same code that worked on the outside door worked on the garage and my spot was the same as my apartment number. That’s easy.

The Uber driver took Emma’s suitcase and lifted it into the trunk while we said goodbye. “I love you and I’ll see you Thursday.”

Emma kissed me and patted my chest, “I’ll let you know when I’m home.”

“Thank you.” I’m always going to worry about her getting home safe. Can’t wait until there’s snow and she’s driving to work or worse, here. I kissed her again, told her I loved her and tucked her in the car. Stood on the sidewalk until she turned the corner too. Avoided going back upstairs by running across the street and getting a bottle of something. Didn’t really matter what. I wasn’t thirsty. Took a walk around the block to drink my bottle of whatever. Finally, throwing the bottle away in the garbage can at the end of the block, I headed back upstairs.

I walked in my door and stood there with my hands on my hips, waiting for something to happen. Everything looked the same. Felt the same. Not sure what I expected. The apartment wasn’t going to suddenly have a portal to hell open up in between the dining table and couch. If it happened, it would be in the guest bathroom. Maybe my closet. I checked both to be sure. Nope, no portals. What I did find in the master bath was a mauve lipstick kiss print on the mirror. It was at my eye level but on the edge close to the wall. I smiled, thinking how she would have had to crawl onto the counter to put it there. I imagined she’d get the same thrill when she found the notes I’d hidden at her place and school.

A little over two hours later my phone rang. The prettiest girl in the world was calling me, “Hello, beautiful.”

She grinned, “Hey, handsome.  I’m home.”

Emma turned her phone around to show me her family room. “I can see that. How was the trip?”

“Uneventful.”

“Perfect.”

“What have you been up to since I last saw you?” The lilt of curiosity in her voice was funny.

“I’ve been busy. Checking email and seeing everything has changed.”

“You’re very flexible.”

“Not nearly as flexible as you, my love.” We shared a dirty smile. “Now, we’re shooting in Paris instead of London. Which is convenient and doesn’t require a flight. And tonight I’m having dinner with a former spy.”

Her eyes lit up, “That sounds fun.”

“It does.”  I agreed. “I’ve been trying to schedule something with him for a while. Finally worked out. It will be good to get in person and ask questions about all the shit I’ve been reading and watching.”

“I’m excited for you. You can get the psychological emotional part down. I imagine in person makes it easier to internalize.”

Not that I doubted, but she’d been paying attention when I’d talked. Her interest in the how and why of the craft side was as enjoyable for me as it was her. I wanted to show her more. I wanted to know about how she taught too, how she knew what to do and how she designed lessons. Which reminded me, “Add me to your online classroom so I can watch you teach.” There’s the added bonus of pretty much having her “on demand” if I wanted to see and hear her. I had the video from the party with her, Eli, and Boone too. That would make a long night alone a little more . . . stimulating.

We didn’t talk long. I was having an early dinner to allow plenty of time to talk and I needed to shower and get ready. Emma needed to unpack and start gathering things to repack. There’s also the part about she’d just left.

Dinner lasted much later than I’d anticipated. It was awesome. Dan told me stories and let me pick his brain. I told him about my part in the movie and he was able to give me some specifics. Not that I’d play the part exactly as he’d said, but I knew what to avoid, what wasn’t realistic. I liked that because a complete mismatch with reality could put me into my head and that’s the last place I wanted to be.

The next morning I hit the gym and had a good workout. Mirrors everywhere told me I needed more than a little personal grooming before leaving. A haircut was already scheduled and I called the salon to add on what I thought I needed. I had lunch with my manager to go over the next few weeks. I don’t have a full time PR person, but I do have a firm with which I contract. Emily had been in contact with them. About my girlfriend. Amazing how fast my mood went from good to not.

“Seb, don’t make that face.”

“What face?”

“The annoyed one where you’re holding in a tirade.”

“I’m glad you recognize the precarious ground you’re standing on.” I drank the last of my wine and crossed my arms across my chest. “I’m going to sit here and be very quiet for a limited amount of time. Talk fast.” I don’t have many tirades. A big part of that is due to the relationship I have with Emily. She’s been with me forever. She knows when to push, when to back off, and when to let me have a tirade. Girlfriends are and always have been a tricky area. Usually, Emily wants me to be more open about a girlfriend. Much like what previous girlfriends wanted. That never turned out well for either of them. Emma was altogether in another class. I wasn’t sullen because I didn’t want to hear about what I should be doing. I was feeling protective and didn’t want business in my personal life. Same issue, different reasons.

“Everything is good. Emma is good. She doesn’t have much of a social media presence and hers is private. Family and friends sometimes tag her, but there’s nothing problematic out there. Once her name is out there she won’t be hard to find because you and several of your friends follow her. It’s a quick find that she’s a teacher, where she works, plays volleyball, has a twin, and has musician friends. She’s known by Pearl Jam fans. They’re protective of all the females in the band’s orbit. Best guess is anything negative is wiped quickly. We called Pearl Jam’s PR people and they’ve worked with her, so we don’t need to. Until something comes up and then we’ll probably have to work with you too. Unless you go silent again.”

I must have twitched.

Emily held her hands out like she was calming a wild animal. “Everyone’s a little concerned because you let Will post something. Oh, and any pictures of her in a bikini are always in a group.” She smiled comically and sat back.

“The ones she sends me are solos.”

“Good to know.”

I sat a second, my blood pressure dropping. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

I nodded and shrugged, “I told Will to post the picture. Don’t know exactly why. I’m happy. I’m in love. I’ve grown. Past is past and I’m moving to the future. All of them.”

“So, the comments and everything. You’re okay?”

“No, Emily, I’m wonderful.”

I waited until I got home to call Emma. She hit voice call. I pouted even though she couldn’t see. “I am at Target replenishing my travel supplies.”

“Sounds fun! Are you in for shampoo and leaving with three hundred dollars worth of who knows what?” Isn’t that the way it usually works at Target?

“I have a list. I’m staying away from parts of the store I don’t need to be in.”

“Smart. What time do you have to be at the court?”

“We’re going to meet for dinner about five. Game at seven.”

“Give Sam your phone so I can pack and watch.”

“I bet if you ask nicely she’ll alert you when something big is going on.”

“I’m a decent multitasker.”

“How was dinner with a spy?”

"Dinner with a spy was" I shook my head and looked up, "fascinating. Books, even non-fiction, and video are good, but watching his expression and mannerisms was so cool. Especially when he had neither." I went on talking while she shopped. She laughed and gasped at the same parts I had. I was excited to see how I could incorporate this new knowledge. We hung up when she was checking out.

~*~*~*~

"Sorry about the loss." I cringed to soften the blow. I knew she didn't like to lose. Who does?

Emma growled, "Frustrating. I want a chocolate brownie or something."

"I think the bakeries are closed." It was a little after ten. "I'll get you one tomorrow."

"You're the sweetest."

"When will you be here?"

"Well before lunchtime. I got everything packed before the game. I'll shower tonight. Get up and be on my way. Do you have plans?"

"Yes. Vanity kicked in. I have a facial and haircut, before therapy. Want a facial?"

"No seaweed."

"Damm, that's what I booked for you."

~*~*~

I spent the morning packing. I’m not a heavy packer. I’ll wear the same thing over and over. I’m working so costuming will be taking care of most of my clothes. I’m invited to the fashion show. Being dressed is part of the package. Emma and I had made a list of places we wanted to see and things we wanted to do while in Paris. I composed an email and sent it on to the hotel’s concierge. I heard back almost immediately. They would create an itinerary and we could adjust it once we arrived. Perfect.

Emma would be back about noon. Our spa treatments and my haircut were set for three and my therapy appointment was around five. I cleaned up around the place. Nothing drastic. I had a cleaning service come in after I go away. I just make sure everything’s put away.  I had my suitcase closed and in the dining area when my text notification went off.

Emma ~ Are you home?

Sebastian ~ Yes.

Emma ~ Alone?

Sebastian ~ Yes.

 I am sensing something is about to happen.

Emma ~ When I get there would you like to play a game?

Sebastian ~ Yes.

 I neither know nor care what she’s talking about. It would be nice to know what I’m going to be playing, though.

Sebastian ~ Could I get more details?

Emma ~ Porn

Sebastian ~ You want to watch porn?

Emma ~ Pretend we're in one. Over the top, things that only work in porn, excessive moaning, name calling, filthy talk porn.

 Fuck. I’ve watched enough porn to know how this was going to go.

Sebastian ~ Yes, I would like to play.

Emma ~ I never doubted you.

Sebastian ~ Are you texting and driving?

Emma ~ Traffic and voice to text. Delivery girl, booty call, escort? Me. This time.

Sebastian ~ I don't know yet.

Emma ~ Text when you do.

Sebastian ~ I love you.

Emma ~ I love you.

 Woman has been away for forty-eight hours and shows back up with this shit. I wasn't a sex-starved horn dog five minutes ago. I wonder what she's wearing? Delivery girl, booty call, escort. I like her choices. I have to seduce the delivery girl. Or be seduced. Booty call would be a repeat. Familiarity without expectations. There are zero expectations with an escort. Well, there are expectations, but only mine. I feel like it's a question of how selfish I want to be and what questions I want to answer after. Booty call it is!

I texted her my choice and that the door would be unlocked. I sat in the chair to wait. Patiently.

[lockdownuk]

Lockdown Diary Part 10

A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.

23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.

Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online. Day 271: Work was dominated by Qfiniti again, including a meeting with Jon and staff from the States, where I found my self taking control to get the next steps in process (and then, Dave Stewart, the SCCM engineer fucked off and put an OOO message on Teams telling me he’s off until Tuesday (it’s Thursday)...and I am off on Monday!) But, I have to say this project does float my boat. Got a text message and then a call from PCH for another laser eye appt this coming Monday at 12.30pm. I mentioned to the lady that phoned that I will have to square it with work (I won’t, but she doesn’t know that) as I can’t afford to lose my job - it just seems the hospital, while under pressue with the admin and the clinic availability - I get it! - just aren’t seeing the issues for the patients. Plus, Peterborough has been declared a Tier 3 from Sunday under the new lockdown scheme, the highest tier. Great...I really want to travel to a highly infected area! managed to find an online booze shop that does Gordon’s and Famous Grouse and will deliver beforee Chrimbo, so I’ve placed the order for dad and Rita’s gift. I spoke with Dad today, he hasn’t heard about his vaccination yet which is a surprise (he’s in the first draft being over 80)

Day 272: Typing on day 273. Work was that manic shit at the end of the dya when I’ve got time off. I am only off on Moday but still had to tie up loose ends, complictaed further by Jon being off next week and Sueanne off this week and the Qfiniti project! In the evening I only mamaged three beers. I ate too much. Plus my sugars were all over the place and way too high! I ordered a torch a couple of days ago (£17), it arrived today. It takes rechargeable batteries or 3 AAAs. Apparently, to get the best performance (i.e. brightness) you need the rechargeable batteries in it, so i charged ‘em. Fucking hell, I’m glad I did - it’s brighter than the sun. It opens up my late walks in winter, for sure.

Day 273: While it was a very late (but sober) night yesterday (gone 4am before lights out) I was up before midday. Usual walking etc. plus gave the bathroom a clean (albeit with wipes, but I did mop the floor - and used the water to also mop the kitchen). Now I am about to stick a pizza in the oven, plus wedges (to have with microwaveable chip shop curry sauce) and watch This Is 40 which is coincidentally on telly tonight - the coincidence being clips of it are on TikTok a lot right now. I am on my second beer and am going to have a smoke right now as well. Lastly for this entry, I have been using my AudioPro speaker today, it pisses me off it’s not WiFi capable but, thru Bt, it does sound fucking good - revisiting James works very well to demonstrate the speaker’s prowess.

Day 274: I have another Paypal a/c. I have been getting emails to my standard gmail account from Paypal saying they are going to charge me £9 for an inactive account which I have been largely ignoring since my paypal a/c has a specific email address. Anyway, I tried to log in, after a password reset and, hey presto, I do have another one, with £35 in it, having just been fleeced of £9 for the aforementioned inactivity, fuckers. It’s registered with the old Market Place address and phone. When I try to transfer the £35 to my card, it wants to confim it’s me by calling the phone, which I can’t amend. Oh, and you can’t contact Paypal direct. Fuck knows what to do! Other than that, usual Sunday, a tad more relaxed since I have tomorrow off, but not that much now I have an eye appointment in Tier 4 Peterborough (it’s been up’d from tier 3)! Up at 1.30 pm (I watched This is 40 and The Guvners last night with lots of beer), feeling worse for wear but, stair climb and a 6 miler acheived!

Day 275: I was at the hospital for 3 hours. The laser clinic didn’t start until 1.30pm so, why my appointment was at 12.20, not even the consultant could understand. 15 minutes of lasering - horrible but I am used to it. It took so long it pretty much fucked my day off up completely. I got a Christmas card from Karen, in the actual post, so, a mail shot. It’s depressing.

Day 276: Back to work and it’s definitely in wind down mode. I’ve decided to compile a list of things I have done this year. It will be on the postive side, such as all the steps I’ve walked and getting an article published about my photography, but it will also include randon facts like getting bitten by a dig twice and not having a haircut. I’ll get it done so I can post in at new year, hopefully be a little inspiring, a little silly and a lot of showing off!

Day 277: Work, again, was quiet. It’s fucking pissing down now, as I type at 21:50, and has been all day. It’s causing havoc and there’s flooding everywhere. I could walk down St. Peter’s Road tonight ‘cos of it (had to go up New Road, Springfield Road, down Latham Road). Soaked a lunhtime and tonight! With a new variant of Coronavirus, France stopped frieght crossing the border. That’s now been resolved but tyeh back log has/is affecting certain food stocks in the shops, of which, fresh veg might affect me for Christams dinner (I plan to do a chicken breast with stuffing, pigs in blankets, yorkshire pud and shed loads of veg. I’ll nip to Co-Op tomorrow morning and see what’s vaialble. It’s a half day at work ‘cos of Christmas Eve, so I can nip out somewhere in the car if need be, as ong as the flooding has subsided. Or I could just get shitfaced and have burgers and pizza.

Day 278: Christmas Eve. Sueanne let me finish at 11.00am so, very shortly thereafter, off for a walk I went; it turned out to be a stop/start affair - flooding as the Nene had burst its banks, ended up doing more of a circuit round town. Bumped into Andy Smith (and his son) and, after that, Ash and Denise. Ended up doing just under 11.5km in 2 and a half hours.Knackered! As I type, I have a chilli on the stove, beer on the go, all the veg and chicken breast bought with no shortages, as feared, for tomorrow’s lunch and looking forward to eating. getting drunk, smoking, listening to music, watching telly....all over the next two/three days.

Day 279: I don’t even remember going to bed last night. As a direct result I got out of bed at 2.30pm. I couldn’t even be bothered with Christmas dinner, let alone anything else like exercise. I’m just about to have chilli for dinner (it’s 8.10pm). Watch some telly then try an go to sleep before midnight. No booze! I did talk to dad earlier. Day 280: Typing on day 281. A better, more productive day. Up @11.00am exercise and walk as usual, although the walk was a different route due to flooding. In the evening I could hear ‘storm Bella’ raging, so windy! I cooked a christmas dinner of sorts, chicken breast with Thyme, all the veg, roasted spuds and parsnip, stuffing (a first for me, albeit co-op stuffing mix), Yorkshie and pigs in blankets. It was smashing! A few beers and The Hitman’s Bodyguard, alays a fun watch. A better day, as I say, but I am feeling particular deflated this Christmas. Day 281: Typing on day 282. I realised, about mid afternoon, that Monday (tomorrow) is a bank holiday so no work. It was a great realisation but, also, worrying that it dawned on my like I’m an old person! Nevertheless, a nice long walk - bumped into Baz & Kate and had a nice long chat, then El & Camila, Aaron and Eva for another, shorter chat. I also saw Denise & Ash along the way. Fog video called later in the evening for a chat too (he told me how he fell asleep at the dinner table, fuck he makes me laugh - unwittingly - when I need it most!) A regular social fest! A repeat of last night’s dinner and a few beers - it was a good day albeit I am in a proper low ebb.

Day 282: Up at midday after a 4am-er. A very long walk (1.75 hours) and a hodge podge dinner (remaining chilli, roasted spuds and peppers, steamed cauliflower and runner beans, grated cheese) - it’s nearly ready, I’ll type the review tomorrow. I realise that this is the first time in 21 Christmases that I have at least talked to K. Is that connected to my mood slump? I reckon so. So, as that fact dawned on me, I then considered, should it be the case next Christmas, it will not be the first in along time and, as such, more manageable....fuck knows how I manage to accentuate any little positive but, thank goodness I do. Day 283: Work was a sedate affair today, fuck all to do really. Sueanne is now follwing me on Insta...I shall invetsigate on how to exclude posts to individuals, methinks. Tea, last night, was fucking lovely. More of the same tonight-ish - currently I am roasting spuds, peppers, garlic, chillies, tomatoes - it’ll all go with left over pigs-in-blankets (5) and a burger. I’ll have bisto beef with mustard on it. I can’t wait! Day 284: Typing on day 285. That meal was fucking lush! Checked on the car todfay and it would not start. Something is draining the battery so I will have to give it a run every day until I can get Julian to sort it. So, I WhatsApp’d Karen to borrow the portable starter. She dropped it off for me. We had the briefest of chats at the doorstep, first time we’ve spoken in weeks. She mentioned my hair! Day 285: NYE. I have just got back from walking to Cottersock and back. I would not have been able to do so without my new torch! I finished and published my double letter quiz on FB, including to the Virtual Pub group and the Oundle Chatter. It’s had some good feedback, I’m rather proud of it. I am going to make chicken casserole now (with dumplings - a first for me, I even bought some flour), have some beers and get a bit stoned. Before that, I am going to finish off my list of things I’ve done this year, including steps wlaked and hours listening on Spotify. I am quite proud of that list too.

Day 286: I fucked the dumplings up, added too much water, so that didn’t happen but the chicken casserole was good, just about to finish it for tea tonight. I also had pizza last night and went to bed at 5am. I have had a lot of good feedback on my list of 2020 achievements. I proud of it. K sent a happy new WhatsApp last night, around 00.30.

Day 287: No booze last night, so I was up before the alarm today (about 10.00am) Two walks, one on my own, another with Fog with a couple of beers. I fucking loved it! Watching datrts (World champs semi finals - been texting Dan while the first one has been on). Going to watch The Aviator later...I’ve not seen it before which surprises me. Why it surprises me I do not know, since I know I haven’t seen it. How the fuck can I be surprised by a fact I’m completely aware of? Day 288: I didn’t watch The Aviator ‘cos Logan Luck was on at 11:55pm on ITV4. Great fildm...I can’t believe that I very nearly paid for it (rent from Sky or Amazon). A late one last night and quite pissed. Thinking about it, having afew beers with Fog in the afternoon made it quite a long sesh for me! Up at just gone midday today, nice long walk (Cotterstock) which was mde long by a painful right ankle - I must have turned or twiested slightly sometime. Still, it survived. Back to work tomorrow - Chrimbo and New Year all done and dusted for the 55th time in my life!

Day 289: First day back at work of 2021. Boris announces another full lockdown in England (there’s a new strain of Covid19 which is seeing huge numbers of infections every day, over 50,000 per day).

Day 290: Something is up with my right foot, the little toe pad. It’s bloody sore. If it gets any worse it’ll affect my walking and exercise. I phoned Anne Bennison to talk about it, she just wants me to go and see her which i donlt want to do if poss, pandemic and all that.

Day 291: Wearing my sandals instead of the M&S slippers and my foot/toepad is already feeling bteer. However, I did inspect my Merrell boots, just in case, and the sole on te right is really worn down, in just three months. I have sent a WhatsApp to CotswoldOutdoors, where I got them from....let’s see what they say! It’s all kicking off i  the US - pro Trump protestors have storm the Capitol Building, where congrees was being held. Only in ‘Merica.

Day 292: Busy at work with rolling out Qfiniti - all that project work was pretty much for fuck all since the SCCM package has to hand held. It’s feckin’ freezing today, below freezing, slippy af on my walks. I have been shopping tonight, £106 in Corby Tesco. That does include 8 cans of sapporo.

Day 293: The fracas at Capitol Hill on Wednesday left 5 dead, it looks like Trump will be impeached. He’s already said he’ll not attend Biden’s inauguration. In a fucking world gone mad, it’s another level of madness. It’s really cold -3℃ tonight, more of the same tomorrow. Makes for brisk walks. I’ve just had chicken balti pie and chips for tea. It was so nice that I burnt the roof of my fucking gob. I’m on the Sapporo and about to have a smoke then watch Jack Reacher. I’ve (kinda) earnt after the first 5 day week for a while.

Day 294: Well, last night saw another late one...5am by the time I :went to sleep. Up at 2pm today with no instention of any exercise or walking or housework or fuck all, really. But, I did my exercises and a 9 mile walk. While I walked I came across Banners, quick 15 min chat and listed to Stage by David Bowie. He’s all over the radio right now as it’s his death’s anniversary tomorrow and his birthday yesterday. It’s a fucking good live album. A few beers tonight, eating trash, watching FA Cup highlights then End of Watch later.  Posh played today (first time in a while due to Covid infections) drew away to (shitty) Lincoln 1-1. Good point as Posh were down to ten men after 67 mins for a second yellow for handball in the area. Lincoln missed the pen. Fucking funny. Chorley, the non leaguers who knocked Posh out in round 2 of the FA Cup, beat Derby in round 3 today (albeit derby fielded an academy side of 11 first timers due to Covid ) - a great day for them!

Day 295: Up at 2pm swearing blind I’d not walk or exercise (again!) but, of course I did. I’ve done over 25 miles this w/e! End of Watch was brilliant last night. Well worth a rewatch, so emotional. I am making butter chicken as I type. I’ve added extra onion, garlic and, of course, chillies. It’s the spiciest butter chicken I have ever tasted! 

Day 296: One of those frustrating days at work when no problem of request I try to resolve goes without a hitch. After a 7km walk in the evening, took the car for a spin and cleaned the bathroom. Fucking knackered. It’s 11:30pm and I’m in bed typing this on the iPad! despite getting up so late, I feel knackered. 11pm bedtime for me, I reckon.

Day 297: Fucking busy at work, the States rolled out a new Okta trust policy and it caused mayhem. Meant my evening walk didn’t start ‘til gone 6pm. When I got back, clened the hall and stairs, made chilli (which I am about to have for tea (gone 10.15pm!) and showered. I’m, again, fucking knackered! Posh played Portsmouth in the EFL Trophy 3rd round at home. Won 5-1. Nice.

Day 298: Had an electrician rouind for the EICR cetrt. He was here until 2pm and it was a pain in the arse, having to work upstairs plus, with having to cut the electricity, all the smart devices lost their settings. And it was freezing up there.

Day 299: Work was impossibly infuriating. Not one pc remote session went to plan! It was pissing down a lunchtime during my walk but, I have to say, the cheap TargetDry coat copes fine in heavy rain for short periods. Everywhere is flooding again even though the rain turned to sleet. By my evening walk, it was dry but bloody cold. Then, when I got in I cleaned the kitchen and mopped the floor and the bathroom’s as well. I fucking done in! Chatted to dad today - same as ever!

Day 300: What a fucking work at week! I am so glad it’s Friday. To celebrate, I ordered new walking boots: Scarpas £121!

[cardinaldaughter]

My Wavy/Curly Hair Journey

So at the end of 2020 I came across a TikTok about wavy hair. The girl in the video was talking about hair types and she said if you have a certain type of hair, it’s wavy/curly and you should embrace your waves/curls. Well, she described my hair perfectly, and I don’t know if it was because it was 10 pm on New Year’s Eve or if it was because we’re going on like a fucking year into this pandemic or what, but I felt ✨inspired.✨

I’ve always had wavy hair. But I’ve never known how to style it, or enhance the wave/curl. So I began my descent into the Curly Girl lifestyle to see if they could help me “embrace my waves”.

After hours of watching videos/reading blogs, I found myself going out that weekend on my usual grocery run, but in addition to that list, I had a list of products recommended by 2b-hair influencers on YouTube as well as from the CurlyGirl subreddit.

I bought a curl cream, gel, microfiber towel, soft scrunchies (they were supposed to be silk but I couldn’t find any and I wasn’t about to order online because damn it, I want curly hair now!) a clarifying shampoo, and a special conditioner for curly hair.

Now, I am not a high maintenance person. I like makeup but I have never bothered to learn about contouring and doing all the fancy stuff you see on Instagram. I wear some eyebrow filler, mascara, and sometimes a winged liner and lipstick. That’s it. Similarly with my hair, I am usually very low maintenance, and I think that’s part of why my hair has been so healthy. And while I’m not particularly confident in my appearance, my hair is a source of pride for me.

So, pre curly girl, this was my hair routine:

Sunday night- wash hair with Tresemme luxurious moisture shampoo. Use Tresemme luxurious moisture conditioner and leave it in for about 10 minutes. Rinse that out, then squeeze out excess water. Spray Milkshake leave in conditioner and gently brush hair. Air dry until bed, then braid and go to sleep.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday- brush hair, use a bit of Shae moisture hair oil to smooth things out. Maybe straighten it, if the mood strikes. If I straighten it I use Tresemme heat protectant spray.

Wednesday night - repeat Sunday

Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday - repeat Monday

There were some exceptions to this of course, but that was the general deal. And my hair was shiny, smooth, soft, and while still a bit frizzy, very healthy.

Then I started using the curly conditioner. It’s the same brand as my normal conditioner, so I didn’t see too much difference there. But then I began implementing these stupidly named techniques like “squish to condish” and “scrunch out the crunch” with the gels and creams. I stopped brushing my hair because the mantra of “don’t brush your waves/curls” was screamed at me from every curly hair blog and video I found. So I didn’t.

Until my hair began getting fairy knots. And falling out.

I was assured in these curly hair videos that hair falling out was part of the process. And to some extent that is true. I lose a few strands every time I wash or brush my hair. But when I added these extra products and stopped brushing (and only finger combing when my hair was wet) I think I managed to lose 3 times as much hair in one shower than I’d lose generally in a week! My hair got dry, and the products left my hair feeling greasy. If I used too little product it was greasy with little waviness. If i used too much it was decent waves in the morning that quickly deflated into a stringy, greasy mess by the afternoon.

I got a couple compliments on my waves/curls, but I had never been so unhappy with my hair.

I was told that maybe my hair was too long and the ends were weighing me down. I hadn’t had a haircut in a year thanks to the pandemic but I found a new salon that stuck to safety guidelines and went and got about 4.5 inches cut off (it needed it anyway so I don’t regret that at all), but even still, the waves and curls weren’t holding. It was just a dry, hair-falling-out l, greasy mess.

I read more and considered going strictly full-capital-CG Curly - no shampoo (I refuse to call it “no poo”. I REFUSE), co-wash only (wash with conditioner, which I have done before- on accident- and hated how my hair felt afterward but was willing to try again), and get rid of all products with certain ingredients (which meant getting rid of my milkshake spray, which was devastating because my hair responds so well to it). THEN I leaned that for some people, a strict CG method isn’t the answer, you should stick with products you know your hair likes, and that technique is more important that product.

Glad I didn’t throw out my old stuff.

So I tried a few different techniques, switched up the order and amount of products I used, tried wet plopping, the pineapple, squish to condish, diffusing different ways- all of it.

My routine became

Sunday - wash with a clarifying shampoo, use the curly conditioner (squish to condish!), rinse that out, add leave in conditioner, finger comb (and spend ten minutes pulling out hair), squish in curl cream, add gel, use microfiber towel to soak up excess water, wet plop, dry and diffuse, “scrunch out the crunch”, and then pineapple or braid for bed.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday - wet hair, add curl cream (squish to condish!!!), add gel (use praying hands to apply, then squish!), use microfiber towel to soak up excess water, plop, dry/diffuse, scrunch hair to break up the gel casing on curls

Wednesday night-all of the Sunday routine, but don’t use the clarifying shampoo.

Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday - all of the Monday routine

And nothing worked. And not only that, but my time spent washing, styling, caring for my hair had tripled, and to no benefit. Itnwas honestly so much worse.

In my frustration I’d go back online and try to figure out what I did wrong this time. I would see posts on that subreddit of women saying “it took a year of CG but my curls are finally starting to do what I want!” And they had a list a mile long of products/routines they stuck to religiously.

And I had this sudden, horror-filled realization that I don’t want to be miserable for a year only to have some halfway decent looking curls.

So over the past four days, i went back to my old routine. I stopped wetting my hair and scrunching it and drying/diffusing it every day. Last night I washed it and conditioned it like I used to. And after three days of not using a bunch of products, of brushing my hair gently, I hardly had any hair fall out. Today I used a heat protectant and straightened my hair. And it’s so soft, and smooth, and shiny, and it doesn’t have that awful greasy feeling that it did when I was wearing it curly.

And I am so much happier.

I know that people with very curly hair need to use certain products to maintain their curly hair health, and I think that’s great and applaud them for the dedication. But I also think, if you have to buy a ton of new products and wait a year for your hair to “finally embrace” your curls... maybe your hair isn’t a naturally wavy/curly as you’d like to think it is. Like, I know my hair is wavy. But it looked so much better when I wasn’t loading it up with products. It felt better too.

I only lasted three and a half weeks trying to “embrace my curls” but i think I learned a very important lesson: I am much happier with healthy hair, than wavy hair.

I do like the microfiber towel and the scrunchies though. Those two things can stay.

[alan-and-suzi]

Sunday 13th September 2020

Betty’s hand lights....

Monday we had a walk into town, went into the Tourist Info and collected a couple of bus timetables, it was pretty much deserted in town at about midday. Still hot 🥵 so we came back home for a cold drink and to sit in the air con. Weigh day today and we both continue to lose weight steadily which is good news. Couldn’t do Mr Motivator and all the walking so just did one in the evening. We spoke with Chris and Carolyn on WhatsApp, made plans to see them in a couple of weeks as they’re busy this week and we’re busy the week after. The local government decided today that present sanctions will be in force in Valencia region for another three weeks, so still no singing or groups of more than ten people getting together.

Tuesday we caught the bus to Carrefoure, we felt safe enough, everyone wearing masks and spaced out. I got a pair of Birkenstock’s re soled at Mr Minit, the very first pair I bought, probably about 6 years ago, they’re good to go again now. We also got some more rechargeable batteries, we don’t hardly use any other type now which I’m pleased about. We bought some drinking glasses, tumblers, that can go in the dishwasher, we’ve broken three of the ones we inherited with the apartment by putting them in the dishwasher....only got a couple left. Fairly busy in Carrefoure but well organised and not really any queues. We had a drink sitting outside in a cafe before catching the bus back.

Wednesday we had an Amazon delivery for Alan of a new hair trimmer (for ears, nose etc). Alan got a text message from the R.A. Clinic giving him an appointment for next Wednesday so we had a walk to the doctors to make an appointment for blood tests, got one no problem for Friday. We dropped into the Spa for some shopping on the way home.

Thursday the builders came about 10.00 to do some odd jobs for us. They wired up the hand lights and fitted them to the wall ( the bulbs are from Prisma Lighting), tried to fit a new door lock to the back door but failed, we need a locksmith. They also chatted to us about various sound proofing options. They’re coming back in a couple of weeks to repair the roof over the balcony, then we can get it painted and finished off out there. We’re sitting outside for breakfast each morning now it’s a little cooler and it’s really lovely.

Friday morning at 8.28 Alan had his blood test appointment so we walked down there, waited about 25mins, delays due to coronavirus as usually they have at least eight nurses doing them and they’re really fast, now it was only two, in two separate rooms, so it was much slower. A lady stood behind Alan in the queue too close and one of the nurses told her to back off. Very clean and organised. We went into the chemist opposite and picked up our prescriptions and some nail clippers. At 5pm we had a video chat with Alan’s parents and sister really nice chat, they’re all well. Linda and Nigel have just come back from Edinburgh which they enjoyed. There was a small earthquake (3.6) in Leighton Buzzard this week which Mum and Dad felt, pictures rattled and the building shook, their first one, scary stuff. We had a film night with a bottle of wine, Dubois Cava, I think it’s my favourite and only 2.49€ a bottle. We watched Nightcrawler, we both thought it was good and gave it a score in the high eighties.

Saturday we cleaned the apartment as usual then Alan went upstairs and had a quick chat with Marco and Veronica about our builders coming, they will need some access to our roof from their balcony, they were OK with that. We had a walk into town to Andres for some cold meat, we’ve got fed up of eating the supermarket stuff. Then we went into Dialprix for a bottle of wine for tomorrow and some more bread squares. Finally we called into our chemist for the last item on my prescription that we couldn’t get the other day and I got two more free masks. It seemed to be a very noisy day, people in the new block over the road were playing loudish music, next door had either a loud TV or salsa music and Marco was in and out all day long, the dogs were woofing and scuffling about and there was hammering and banging intermittently. I expected a noisy night but then about 11ish it all went quiet, apart from the odd loud car going by. We have downloaded a free white noise app (my noises) and it works brilliantly, you can choose from many different noises, white noise, ocean, rain etc etc, I prefer white noise as it’s less distracting, sounds just like our air con is going. When we have that on and ear plugs in it blocks out everything, apart from the very loudest of loud motorbikes going by or something similar, it’s a brilliant find.

Sunday we sat outside for a very leisurely breakfast, we didn’t have to be anywhere so we sat reading and chatting for ages. We did Mr Motivator then relaxed some more. After lunch we shared a bottle of wine and watched a couple of films, a double matinee, they were Rounders and Phantom Thread, they were both good and we rated them in the 80’s. Later we had a snack and then I gave Alan a haircut and we played games and read.

We have either been doing Mr Motivator twice a day or going for a walk and one Mr M. We are still eating less and are very motivated to keep going, all cravings for chocolate and crisps have gone now thankfully and when we’re shopping we don’t even look at them. Sometimes a day seems to go slowly but the weeks are flying by. Alan has been writing every day, his third short story is now done, just needs checking over and polishing then it will be ready to be sent off. The October edition of Writers Forum came out on Saturday and Alan’s first ever story was listed as being Highly Commended, how brilliant is that for a first attempt, I’m so proud of him. As the story wasn’t published in the top three it can be sent off to another competition so he is now looking where to send it next. I have been sewing together all the ties I got to make a skirt, I’m just waiting for the last three ties to come from Linda and then I’ll get it Finished. Still doing our daily challenges and playing Moonlight Lite Mahjong most days.

[talltalesandbedtimestories]

A View To A Winchester (Part 7)

Series Page

Summary: Julie’s starting a new life after divorce in a home with a very nice view.

A Dean X OFC story. I got this idea staring out the view of my home office window and thinking how nice it would be to have Dean Winchester to ogle. Gotten pretty cute and fluffy, with some angst. I’m a few sections ahead now in my writing so the outline of the story is taking shape and smut is on the near horizon. This has been a fun escape during stay-at-home orders. Getting to know Dean through my heroine’s eyes has been a great writing exercise and therapeutic reduction in anxiety. There should be studies done on what staring at photos and video of Dean/Jensen does to the human body. (But the SPN fandom has probably done one already; if not, it could be the next big scientific breakthrough.)

Section Word Count:  3,385

Section Content: fluff, angst, R-rated language, drinking, Spice Girls references, Dean being Dean and turning ladies to puddles

Thank you to @deanwanddamons​ for reading some of the story so far. Appreciate it.

~~~~~

Dean had not returned the next day. But Julie was apparently on his mind. He’d texted her that morning with an update. Another job had dropped into his lap. One too good to pass up. He wasn’t sure how long he’d be gone. But he was looking forward to seeing her when he got back.

That was on a Monday. She filled that day with decisions about what to make for her “girl power get together” scheduled for the end of the week. There was also the necessary recuperation from overdoing it with the wine. She hadn’t been that hungover in a while. Bingeing on caffeine and “The Office” helped.

By Tuesday, she’d become ancy. Staying home was not going to work. If her mind was going to run around in circles, there would need to be something else to occupy it. Rifling through options landed on a trip to a nearby state park. She’d decided on one with a bit of a challenging hike. Composed of winding hills and trails near the Brandywine River, the nature reserve filled her senses, balancing the whirlwind of emotions. She spent close to an hour sitting beside the riverbed. A turbulent spot chosen where the white water rushed over boulders and splashed into a slight descent. The river’s frantic pace cancelled out the chirping of busy birds. A gauge nearby displayed a healthy amount of rain had occurred over the past few weeks.  

Even the intrusion into her personal space by a talkative, friendly dog walker didn’t bother her that much. The petite raven-haired woman, whose age was hard to pinpoint, made some chit chat while Julie trekked back to her car. Her name was Ina and she was new to Delaware. Currently, she was in search of a server job at a high-end restaurant where the tips would make it worth her time. “Any recommendations for decent food markets? Best place to order take-out, Thai being my favorite?” Ina’s chocolate lab, Cocoa, sniffed at Julie’s sneakers with abandon as questions were tossed in her general direction. Julie pet Cocoa, dodging some inquiries and rambling off information about places near her home. Cocoa got a few good scratches behind an ear before she wished Ina well settling into Pike Creek.

Wednesday ticked by even slower. Her fingers itched to text Dean. The basement had been the lucky recipient of her time and attention. A large amount of progress was made unpacking boxes, sorting out donations, and finding permanent spots in the house for decorative items. She broke down and reached out to her brother and sister-in-law, Patty, and face timed with her nephews later that night. 

By Thursday, she went over her mom’s house. They ended up going to the mall and then shopping for the food Julie needed for her Friday night get together. She was reminded by her mother to feed the ladies well, with various cooking tips. Dean was also a large part of her mother’s focus. Julie feigned as much non-interest on the Winchester topic as possible. But her mother knew her well enough. She was reminded upon leaving to feed him the lasagna in the freezer soon.

Karen, Stacey, and Cat benefitted from a substantial number of Julie’s hours in the kitchen that Friday night. She’d attempted chicken parmesan, one of her mom’s signature dishes. Sauce had simmered on the stove for a couple hours - not as long as Brigida’s, but not bad. They were on the second bottle of red wine, having moved out of the dining room and into the living room. Cat, sensible and responsible as usual, was abstaining and had driven the other former college roommates over to Julie’s house.

Streaming radio played. They ended up singing along to “Holler” by The Spice Girls, sans Ginger. Julie had always been eager to take Posh’s lines, mainly because hers were few and far between. But, Karen, with her mocha colored skin, coiffed haircut, and pencil-thin skirt wrapping a pencil-thin body truly embodied the word posh. In spite of all that, Karen tapped away on her cell phone while covering Scary’s verses.

Julie had always admired Karen’s drive and dedication. She even hoped to get the divorce thing down as well as Karen. Her two teenage boys were spending the weekend at the Ex’s. She was heading up to New York by train to see her wealthy lawyer boyfriend Saturday morning. Karen made more money than “new man” did. She was a partner in a very successful law firm.  

Stacey always loved Baby Spice. She had the requisite long blonde hair and blue eyes and curvy figure. She also apparently loved babies, as she had birthed three of them in her fifteen years of wedded bliss. The youngest child was two and at home with the rest of the brood that night. Her somewhat sickeningly sweet hubby was great with the kids, she gushed. “He doesn’t think he’s babysitting when he spends time with them.” She nodded and pointed at all three women in succession. Her affinity for wine had not faltered either from their college days. Stacey’s lips are already way too loose when she’s sober. Her rouge stained mouth was downright slippery at present, wet with a good Cabernet Sauvignon.

“Lucky you.” Karen quipped. “My ex went to the mat to get shared custody. Yet, every time it’s ‘his’ weekend, there has to be an argument.” Karen’s love for air quotes hasn’t gone away. She smiled over at Cat. “You should have tried harder to seduce me, Kitty Kat. Would have saved me decades of dumb dick.”

Cat, who always seemed relegated to Sporty Spice by default, pushed black rimmed glasses up the bridge of her nose. Her blue eyes crinkled behind the frames. “It wouldn’t have stuck, Kar.” She dipped and sipped at her soda. Sharp angles of her brown bob curtained a pale face. Stubby fingers with short nails - that she probably still bites - flicked the hair back. “Besides, I wouldn’t be happily domesticated with Sheila now. And you hate dogs. I have two, remember? Big ones.” Cat turned to Julie. “What about you, Jules?”

Julie’s eyes widened behind her own glasses. “Are you offering to try and seduce me, Cat?”

Karen and Stacey laughed. Cat blushed. “No, smartass. Are you going to get a pet to keep you company?”

Julie shook her head. “Don’t think so.” She was taking it easier on the wine than the other two, still milking her second serving. There would be no hangover repeat.

“Well, a man, then?” Karen asked.

Stacey guffawed. “It’s only been a few months. Give the woman a chance to grieve.”

“Grieve over what? A shitload of baggage she never checked on the flight.” Karen shot back.

Cat rolled her eyes. “Here they go,” she mumbled.

Julie cleared her throat. All three turned to stare in her direction. “There is… someone.”

Karen slapped her thigh. “That’s my girl!”

“Already?” Stacey’s lids blinked in rapid succession.

Cat waved a hand at Stacey to hush, looking at Julie the whole time. “Details.”

Julie began the very lengthy tale that was Dean Winchester. When she was done, she was met with mixed reactions from the trio.

“He’s been stalking you?” Karen’s brow furrowed.

“He’s a bounty hunter?” Stacey added her concern.

“What’s his name again?” Cat pulled her tablet out of the huge purse by her feet. She was a communications manager at a large non-profit and social media was her specialty.

Julie shifted in her seat. “Dean Winchester.” Defense mode shot up. “To be fair, it’s not like I was innocent in the whole stalking thing, either.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t go much beyond some Googling, right? He got downright illegal in his activity.” Karen shook her head.

“Hm.” Cat frowned. “You said he’s around our age?”

Julie nodded. “43, he said.”

Stacey wagged a sluggish finger. “Hey, we’re 40. Don’t age us all prematurely. Nature’s doing a fine job of that without any additional assistance.” Stacey’s starting to slur. May have to cut her off soon.

Cat ignored Stacey, swiping and typing. “I’m not coming up with anyone around that age with that name. Weird.”

“Why’s that weird?” Stacey asked.

“Everyone has a digital footprint. Something can be found on anyone pretty quickly. Even if it’s the smallest, inconsequential bit of data. But, to find nothing…”

Julie shrugged. “Maybe he’s good at covering his tracks.”

“Even more reason to be wary of this guy, Jules.” Karen attempted a maternal look. “He sounds like the epitome of a bad boy. Come on, a vintage muscle car? You’re a sucker for that type. We were study partners working on our Minors in Psychology together, remember? Think about it. Ten years with a man you thought was a good partner and reliable, only to have that rug ripped out from under you? I’d be searching for the exact opposite, too, faster than you could say peanut butter sundae.” No wonder she makes the big bucks. She presents a damn good argument.

“Karen’s right.” Stacey tried to sound soothing. “You’re in a very vulnerable state right now. Hormones are probably all over the place. Any guy with ill intentions could take advantage of that.”

Julie raised a brow. “If you saw this man in person, Stace… trust me, you’d be all aboard the Dean Train. Remember Gavin Teller?” Julie leaned forward for emphasis.

“Yeah?” Stacey squeaked out the question. 

“Imagine Gavin having aged to perfection, like that fine wine you enjoy so much.” She pointed at Stacey’s glass. “Now, square that. You get Dean Winchester.”

“We all remember Gavin in his heyday.” Karen let out a low-key whistle. “Damn. I may have to reconsider my opening statement.” Her original career path of a prosecutor fell by the wayside midway through her college career. An enticing salary that could be earned helping clients buy and sell publicly traded companies won out.

Stacey shushed Karen. “College quarterbacks don’t turn into bounty hunters.”

Cat raised both hands in the air. “That is an opinion, not fact. And a totally ridiculous leap. Besides, Gavin Teller sells cars at his dad’s dealership now, is bald, and has a pot belly. His local TV spots are downright cringeworthy. Such a pain in the ass when his company sponsored one of our events. Wanted his cheesy grin inserted in so many media posts. How is that better than being a badass bounty hunter?”

Julie smiled at the tension and exchanged a knowing glance with Karen. They had long suspected there’d been some sexual experimentation between Cat and Stacey around college graduation. It had centered around a night of lemon drop body shots.  

Stacey tilted her nose up. “He was always nice to me.”

“That’s because he liked how you looked in that cheerleading skirt, Stace. I know I did. But, really, Julie… you should be careful.” Cat repeated the other’s concern.

The doorbell chimed. Stacey gasped and Karen’s posture stiffened. Cat returned the tablet to her purse. 

“Did you order more food?” Nervous laughter from the ladies followed Cat’s question.

Julie shook her head. She looked at her watch. It was not quite 7:30 pm. Seconds later her phone buzzed. She tapped at the screen to view the text.

Knock, knock

“Oh, shit.” Julie whispered.

“What?” Karen placed her wine glass atop a coaster on the coffee table. Even in high alert, the woman has good etiquette.

“It’s him.”

Stacey cupped a hand over her mouth.

“Dean Winchester?” Cat asked.

“Yeah.”

“Why’s he coming by unannounced?” Karen was in full-blown fact-finding mode.

Julie wrinkled up her nose. “I may have told him to stop by when he got back.”

“How desperate are you?” Stacey scolded.

“Stacey…” Julie sighed.

Karen raised two hands in the air with a smile on her face. “This is great.”

“Why?” Cat asked.

“So we can all get held hostage by Julie’s lady killer?” Stacey’s voice got higher with each word.

“We can vet him.”

“Vet him?” Julie groaned.

“Yep.” Julie had seen that stern nod from Karen countless times. “If he seems like a creep, you’re done with him. I’ll call in a favor to get a court order issued if need be.”

Stacey nodded. “Yeah. Between the three of us, we’ll be able to give you a decent character profile. And Cat’s not affected at all by men…”

Cat slapped both palms on her thighs.

Karen waved Julie to the door. “Hurry up and open it.”

“This is a horrible nightmare,” Julie mumbled. Her stomach was doing somersaults. What the hell will Dean think? What will the girls do?

“Your phone’s buzzing again.” Cat commented. “Anxious little bugger, isn’t he? What did you promise the man?”

Julie took a deep breath, her hand on the doorknob. The last rays of daylight sparkled through the etched glass. Maybe this is good. I may really need an objective opinion. After all, he’s probably not as irresistible as I’m making him out to be. Context.

When she opened the door, Dean greeted her with a full watt smile. “Hey there.” The two words slipped out slow. His hands held the cake box, fingers thrumming against the cardboard sides. “I was told to deliver this as soon as I got back.” His tongue darted out to the side for a quick lick of his bottom lip while he inspected her.

Damn. He was outfitted in a light grey, muscle-hugging t-shirt and faded blue jeans. Positively edible. Fuck context. She couldn’t stop the smile from spreading over her lips. This will be fun.

He stepped up into the entryway, not waiting for permission to enter. His hands offered Julie the box. She was careful to grab the box from the base. He glanced over her head and spotted the company in the living room. His eyes narrowed, tilting down to look into Julie’s eyes. “Sorry. Am I interrupting?” He whispered. “I saw the car parked out front when I drove into the neighborhood… didn’t recognize it…”

Julie arched a brow. “Were you worried for my safety? Or being nosy?”

He grinned. “A little of both.”

She nodded him into the living room. “Come meet some friends.”

He nodded in return and shuffled into the living room, hands stuffed in his pockets, shoulders back, a swirl of timid confidence. The ladies were all up from their seats. The tiny living room felt even smaller with the congregation and Dean’s frame occupying some of it. Julie’s slow steps gave her time to take in the reactions, hiding somewhat behind Dean’s impressive stature. In his wake, she picked apart his scent. The heady mix of leather, sweat, and grease was sharp and crazy intoxicating.

Stacey’s mouth hung open in slight disbelief. Karen fiddled with her hoop earrings and gave Dean the full top to bottom to top inspection. Cat’s eyes narrowed.

When Julie strolled up to Dean’s left, she saw his cautious smile preparing to melt the group. “Dean, these are some college friends of mine.” Julie rattled off their names in order. “Karen. Stacey. Catherine.”

Cat smiled over at Julie, appreciating the replacement of her nickname reserved only for select company.

And, then, Dean unleashed the smile that Julie was certain would topple their wall of uncertainty. He extended his hand and shook each one with the right amount of strength. “Pleasure to meet you, ladies. I didn’t think Julie had any friends.” He chuckled. “She doesn’t get many visitors.”

“And you’d know that because of all the spying you’ve been doing on our dear friend, I hear.” Karen was ready to knock him down a peg or two right out of the gate. But the look on her face betrayed the lackluster attempt at disapproval.

Dean’s eyes widened and he stared at Julie. “Have you been talking about me?”

Julie pursed her lips.

Dean shrugged, intense eyes still on Julie. “Well, if you appreciated beautiful ladies as much as I do, you’d understand.”

Stacey cleared her throat, Dean reddening her cheeks even more than the red wine had. She looked in desperate need of fanning. “Where’re you from, Dean?”

The question pulled his gaze from Julie. He smiled at Stacey again. “Kansas.”

Julie tilted her head, wondering if it was the truth.

“Long way from Kansas.” Cat added.

“Well, I’ve been all over the country.”

The three nodded in unison. Karen asked, “Have you gotten a tour of Julie’s house yet, Dean?”

Julie’s eyes zeroed in on Karen with laser focus.

Dean licked his top lip. Julie caught Stacey and Karen taking particular notice of that sexy tick of his. Not the only one at the mercy of those physical attributes, am I, Ladies?  “Um, no. This is the first time I’ve been allowed entrance into Julie’s compound, actually.” He pointed to the sliding door. “I’m usually relegated to outside chores.”

“Uh-” Julie started.

“We were getting ready to take a look around,” Stacey interjected. “Jules, why don’t we get the full narrated tour with Dean, here?”

Julie could feel her cheeks blushing.

“Oh, that’s…” He laughed, protesting with a shake of his head, “that’s okay. I’ll leave you ladies to your night. I was only dropping off this cake.” He pointed to the box Julie was still holding. “Still pretty damn tasty after a week.” He grinned at her. “I snuck another slice before bringing it back.” He rubbed a hand on his thigh. “It was nice meeting all of you.”

The three nodded again in unison. As Dean turned their gazes all dropped to stare at his ass. Julie stifled a giggle and pushed the box into Stacey’s hands. She met Dean at the door. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

He bent close to her ear and whispered, “You’ll have to let me know if I passed the test later,” waited a beat, straightened his posture, then ended with, “Jules.”

The light spilling in through the front door glass lit up his eyes a crystal green. “You’ve already passed mine.” She whispered back.

“Good.” He grinned.

“What are you doing tomorrow night?” she asked.

His tongue peeked out only a sliver between his lips, revving up the grin even more. “Guess that depends on you.”

“Come over around 8:00.”

He tilted his head. “Is that a request or an order?”

She ignored the question. “Make sure you eat dinner ahead of time. Cause I’m not making any.”

Surprise mixed with amusement on his face. He glanced into the living room. The ladies were seated now, talking amongst themselves, but still staring at the pair. His gaze heated her back up when it returned. “Want me fueled up for any tasks in particular?” Julie shrugged in response. “Hm. Any other commands?”

“Just don’t disappear tomorrow.”

He nodded. “Yes, Ma’am.”

She sighed. “Don’t call me Ma’am.”

His eyes narrowed. “Kind of sexy when you’re bossy.”

She laughed, blushing again.

“And when you’re blushing.” He opened the door for himself, waved a hand to the women and then mouthed “See you tomorrow night” to Julie.

As soon as the door shut, Stacey called out, “I take back everything I said earlier.”

Karen added, “If you get kidnapped, give him my address so he can swing by and grab me, too.”

Julie giggled, walking over to the group. “Seriously, what did you think?”

Stacey’s eyes bugged out. “Oh my god! He’s gorgeous and knows how to use it. That’s dangerous on a ton of levels. But I don’t think he’s a crazy psycho.” Stacey fanned herself. “My husband’s in for it when I get home.”

Karen nodded. “Oh, he’s totally trouble and you’re in for an amazing ride. But, in this case, it’s not the destination but the journey. The journey all over that fine man, of which explicit details will be mandatory. Plus, he didn’t go for the bait to inspect your house. I think an under the radar creep would have been all for that.” She pointed at Julie. “But, we still get a tour as your oldies and besties.”

“Of course.” Julie turned to Cat. “What about you?”

Cat shrugged. “He seems alright. I still think he’s got stuff to hide, though. I’m going to do some serious digging.”

Julie frowned.

“Just looking out for you,” Cat added. “But he did have a really nice ass.”

Part 8

Series Page

[sarakuper]

Taylor & EJ’s Wedding; Loveland & Fort Collins, Colorado

Stop #29, Oct 9-13

It took us 4 days to finally get to Taylor and EJ’s house in Loveland, Colorado! The night before we stayed at Sean’s parents house in Omaha for a short, but fun, visit with his family. We are looking forward to going back to meet baby Ruth (Sean’s newborn niece) and celebrate Caite’s (Sean’s sister) birthday next weekend!

We arrived late afternoon on Wednesday and were immediately made at home. It felt so good to be back in Colorado and even better to be in the company of friends that are like family. Even Jaxon felt at home with his best pupper friends, dog beds, and a fenced yard to run around in. That night the four of us plus Dillion, another friend, went out for dinner in Loveland. The cold front was coming in and it started hailing. If you’re from Colorado then you know the weather gets crazy, but even this hail surprised us! By the time we left the restaurant the ground and tops of our cars were covered in a layer of white. This wasn’t a good sign for Sean; he intended on working in Denver the next morning to blow sprinklers out for his customers. He had hoped the freeze would come later in the day on Thursday, but instead it froze Wednesday night making Thursday a really miserable day for him.

He left for Denver at 7am and while we watched news describing the awful conditions that no one was prepared for this early into the season. There were record high accidents that morning. It took Sean over 3 hours to get to Denver which usually only takes 50 minutes. And, on top of that, he was already feeling sick. Taylor, Ej and I spent the day in and out of their house running wedding prep errands and making soup . Taylor and I combined our recipes to make home made chicken soup; nothing like Jewish penicillin to knock out whatever Sean was getting. It snowed on and off all day, and it really made us feel like we were at the start of winter. But where did fall go!? I swear it was just summer! 

Later that night a few friends of Ej’s (and Sean’s) arrived at the house after making the drive from Nebraska. They stayed for the night and switched to their hotel the following morning. It was fun to see Sean reconnect and hang out with old high school friends, and we had a fun evening spent catching up and playing frogger, the video game.

Friday morning Taylor and I met her sister-in-law Kayla to get manicures and pedicures. It was the official start to the wedding weekend!!!! When we finished we went home to shower and get ready for the rehearsal. That morning Sean got a killer haircut, and I couldn’t stop staring at him for how handsome he looked! 

The rehearsal went well and all was smooth. A bunch of other friends and family had arrived for the weekend including Hannah and Sierra, two of Taylor’s bridesmaids. We continued to dinner at Vern’s and had a delicious meal together before hanging out at a pool hall in Fort Collins. We played pool for a bit before heading back to Taylor and Ej’s to pack up and get ready for the big day.

The wedding day was here! We woke up early and completed all the last minute errands before heading to the venue. Only a few things went wrong…. only a few tears were shed…. but nothing that wouldn’t blow over; nothing that couldn’t be fixed. As soon it was us bridesmaids in the bridal suite getting ready with Taylor to celebrate her big day, everything was right. Taylor’s wedding dress was straight out of a fairytale! It was absolutely stunning, as was Taylor in it. Once the wedding started, almost nothing went wrong, except when Taylor got stung by two bees in the middle of Ej’s vows, While Taylor yelped in pain and shock, it turned out to be a funny and cute moment that made the ceremony even more memorable. The weather was perfect and the setting was gorgeous. Everything was perfect.

We ate, we danced, we sang; we had a blast! Sean slayed during his best man speech and put tears in our eyes.

The party didn���t stop until late in the night (but really early morning!) After the reception we headed to downtown Fort Collins to bar hop until close. There was only one problem… I left my ID back at Taylor and Ej’s house (about 30 minutes away in Loveland). So, instead of telling Taylor about this, I decided to use my skills from college to sweet talk my way into the bars. All I had to show was a picture of my passport on my phone, but that and some smooth talk did the trick at the first bar :) Sadly, the bouncer at the second bar would not budge. He didn’t care that I was with a bridal party and forgot my ID, or that I’m almost 30 years old, or that I had a picture of my passport on my phone. Basically, he had no heart! Just kidding, I get it. Either way, I found a way to sneak in without the bouncer knowing, and the night went on like normal. Oh… the skills you learn living in NYC! We didn’t head back to the hotel until we got kicked out of the bars for close.

Sunday, after checking out of the hotel, was filled with naps and snacks. It was time for a day of recovery and relaxation! It was such a special weekend celebrating such amazing people and their beautiful relationship, and I couldn’t have been happier being right by their side! #taylorandelijahSAYIDO 

Over the next few weeks we are mostly hanging out in Colorado doing errands, attending appointments, doing some work, and spending time with friends. We will also hang out at Sean’s parent’s house for family weekend.

Thanks for reading, love you all.

[iheartsurveys]

190

Quick! Chinese or Mexican? Mexican

How many significant others have you had in your WHOLE life? I’ve been in a grand total of 0 relationships in which I’d introduce the other person as my boyfriend.  So yeah.

I have to ask: What does the last text you received say? <3

How about the last text you sent? Night <3 to my momma lol

Have you shared any kisses today? Sure haven’t unless you count Theo, Britt’s dog lol

Did the last person you kissed have soft lips, or were they kind of crusty? Last actual person and not a dog had soft lips

Do you think your life will be any different a year from now? A year from now I’ll (hopefully) be at my new job for a year! Maybe making more money/getting promoted? That’d be cool.  Also idk where we’ll be living we’ve talked about maybe moving more east.  And it’d be nice to be in a relationship for once but ya know who tf knows

How many windows are in your bedroom? 2

Have you ever been in a fist fight? Nope

When was the last time you went to the doctor? Few months ago

Are you going out of town anytime soon? Leaving my town to see my mom and pups on Wednesday, and then Thursday for work I need to go to DC in the morning.  Not sure if we’re going anywhere for Christmas, but I’m going to Cali in January!

Do you hate your ex? Nah

When are you going to get a haircut? Idk I’m into growing it out currently even though the ends are looking meh

Can you fit your hand around your wrist? Yep 

Have you ever hurt yourself on purpose? No

When was the last time you applied chapstick? A few days I keep misplacing my chapstick and lost a bunch too

Are you a coffee person or a tea person?

Coffee fo sho

Do you have a weird laugh? Nah I don’t think so

What kind of deodorant do you wear? Secret

Do you have videos on YouTube? Nope

When’s the last time you had a phone conversation for more than ten minutes? The other day talking to my dad probably

Do you laugh at inappropriate times? I have before but I try not to, I’m typically a decent person

What’s your fast food restaurant of choice? I just answered thissssss

All the people you’ve kissed, what did their names start with? A, B, C, Z.  Not in that order but I realized and was like wow maybe I should start talking to the middle of the alphabet, maybe the ends are my downfall lolol

Are you in any kind of pain right now? Nope

Are you the jealous type? Eh it depends, I have my moments

What did you and your ex fight about most? As I’ve mentioned, no real bf, but I count guys I’ve dated as ex’s I guess for the sake of surveys because literally 10000 questions are about relationships and it’s annoying skipping them all soooo yeah.  Anyways.  Bren and I fought about him being stupid and lying about stupid shit.  Literally the dumbest shit ever like ugh idk.  He’s really the only guy I’ve dated that I’ve “fought” with

Do you have a foot phobia? No but I don’t particularly like feet 

Well, are you a germaphobe? Yes and no, it depends

Do you get frustrated easily?

Again, it depends.  Mainly with traffic/bad drivers

Don’t you love long hugs? Sure

And long kisses? Also sure

Have you ever purchased condoms?

I have not

Do you have a dirty mind? Sometimes

What’s your favorite soda? Coke

Do you check the mail everyday, or somebody else? I do more than Britt

Did you think braces were cool when you were little? Not really cool but there was a kid I liked in middle school that had braces and like I thought the braces were part of what made him cute lolol

Do you ever go without makeup or doing your hair? Yeah

Put your iTunes on shuffle RIGHT NOW and tell me the first song it plays. I’m currently listening to my music on shuffle so I’ll just hit next.  Blastoffff by Joywave

What is the last song you added to your iTunes library? Ummmm Trampoline by SHAED

Are you embarrassed by any of the songs in your iTunes? Nah

When was the last time you were sick? I had a stomachache earlier today if that counts.  Sick sick, in the summer

Did you get anybody else sick? No either time

Have you had your flu shots? Yeah a month or two ago

What brand is your camera? I just use my iPhone these days

Do you like raisins? Nope

Who was your valentine this year? My dogs

When did you first kiss the last person you kissed? April of 16

And when did you last kiss the last person you kissed? June of 16...oy 

Did you borrow that shirt from somebody? Nope

What was the last thing you put in your mouth? Water

Do you like to swim? It’s okay

How many vacations have you been on in the past year? Only one really

Have you ever gone on vacation with your boyfriend/girlfriend? Still singleeeee! Andrew and I did go to the beach but it was for a school thing not really vacation

Are you supposed to be doing homework, young man/lady? Not in school

Do you have to wake up early tomorrow? I don’t have to but I should to get used to it for work...but I’m not gonna lol

Do you have any prescriptions currently? Yeah

Are you upset about anything? Not really

[thedivinefish]

TGIWednesday and party like it's MY birthday

TGIWednesday News

Today is my birthday and yes, this is how I feel as my g'daughter Charlie represents another year has come and gone!  Where does it go?  I have a movie star client that always says, “The days are long but the years fly by!”  The ultimate lessons that I have learned over time are as my sweet momma always said, “I don’t do rush.” So slow it down a bit and don’t hurry up into anything or anyone!  Know that I appreciate you and every birthday. I am now making every effort to receive personal self-care, whether it’s a haircut/massage/reading or other.  And with all of my birthdays I like to treat others...  

So here you go in celebration of my birthday on August 19th we have activated a Special 19% off Discount on ALL Audio MP3 and eBooks in the shop for the next 19 hours!  You'll see the price adjustment after you Add To Cart and begin Checkout.  This deal will be gone in a FLASH so don't delay!  Go here now and have fun shopping!  (*sessions/prayers zoom videos and certification are NOT included - time runs out at 6pm ET/ 3pm PT on Thursday the 20th) Make it fun today and every day and know that I appreciate you and I plan on having my version of fun too!

Get Jimmy's Bday19 Discount Here!

TGIWednesday Download

~ CLEARING YOUR DAY AND EVERY DAY ~ I believe, think, know and feel that my day today is Clear. I know, when, where, how and why to release my day today from unclear.  I am ready, willing and able to have everything today in this very day, running forward with grace and ease and I am asking in all time lines and languages and so it is.

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

AUGUST 19th- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! Birthday Greetings from my Inbox: "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, listen my tooth is really bothering me and I have another dentist appointment tomorrow but I am hoping to get with you today to get rid of this pain and anxiety, so get me in on your first available, K?. "Happy Birthday, do you think my resumé is being received because the recruiters act skittish and I am wondering if it’s just me or the whole state of Florida? Can we schedule? "Jimmy, Happy Birthday my dear friend, I hope you are having a blast and I know that traditionally you don’t schedule clients on your birthday, but I am hoping you will make an exception for me because I just got back from the doctor, hit me back. "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, I forgot that you are a fellow Leo like me, listen, I cannot find my car keys anywhere.....Thoughts? Hints? Impressions? "Happy Birthday buddy, I know you’re not working today but my anxiety and loneliness is at a new level, honestly we have to get together ASAP anything available noonish today? Call, text or email asap. "Jimmy, I know that you’ve been working on me for attracting more women and I REALLY want to get with this new girl. I don’t think I told you that I found out her husband’s name is the same as mine and now she’s acting all cold towards me. Do you think that all the attractive good mojo stuff you’ve been sending my way went to the wrong Phillip? I know it’s like midnight but call me ASAP." Daily Affirmation: "Today I will remember that we have choices. That "No" can be a one word sentence. That other people are generally self-absorbed and that I can make the choice to buy into that as a belief and or as much as a choice that they have made. Today I will choose peace and quiet."   

From the Fish Box

"Good morning Jimmy, When I woke up early this morning my cat still hadn't come home. So I got dressed and went to go look for her. After 45-min and feeling into where she was, I stood at a spot quietly calling (as it still was really early) and suddenly she started meowing from somewhere and found her way to me. After a bit of saying hello, she led the way home. So, she's back and I'm happy ;) Thanks for the session and assistance yesterday. It helped a lot!" - Nicky

From Jimmy: Some of you may have read on Facebook that MY sweet black male cat "Kitty" has been missing for over a week.  If you can offer your prayers for his safe and quick return, we sure could use them!  🙏  It would be the best birthday present ever!!

Monthly LIVE Zoom Event

Next MySwitchWorks Live Zoom Event Wednesday August 26th 7:30-8pm ET August: Themes of Loss

Have you recently suffered a loss of work, a loved one in spirit, lost innocence, lost health, lost youth and vitality?

Let’s have this one be about what you feel you’ve lost and what you’d like to reclaim!  Gainful employment, peace, restored zest for life etc...  Send in your Top 3 to support@jimmymackhealing.com (please do not reply to the confirmation email)

Register Here for August - $22

LIVE Appearances - Free Healing

Thursday Sept. 23rd - The Global Gathering

with host Dipal Shah. The Gathering is an online spiritual event in which multiple healers, lightworkers, catalysts and spiritual teachers come together as ONE to support humanity by anchoring love, light, joy, wellness and optimism.    Join Us and Watch Online!   

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show

NEW VIDEO FORMAT! WATCH IT LIVE  TUESDAY'S at 4pm EDT / 1pm PDT Watch and Participate (via Comments) during the Live TV Show streamed on Goldylocks Productions YouTube Channel, Facebook Page and Periscope.   NOTE: You will need to log into your YouTube (Google) or Facebook accounts to comment. If you watch the Live show from any other location other than the 3 listed below, your comments will not be seen by the Show Host or Producer. https://www.facebook.com/GoldylocksProductions https://www.pscp.tv/Goldylocks168/follow Or watch all live and replays in the archives here: https://thejimmymackhealingshow.com/

Instructions for the VIEWERS: 1.    One reading/message per person. The first question posted will be answered, so please think about your question carefully before posting it.  2.    If you want a longer and more detailed message, please book an appointment with the Show Host.  3.    Spirit does come through and gives messages that can apply to many, not just the person asking the question. 4.    It is not required nor should be expected that every question or comment will be addressed by the Show Host. 5.    If you have any issues with the show host or show format, please contact the Show Producer... not the Show Host. 6.    Contact the Show Producer, Rev. Tiffany White Sage Woman via email: goldylocksproductions@hotmail.com Yesterday's Show - Watch the replay here! Special Guest Jeremy Riden  Divine Spark Ministries https://www.facebook.com/JeremyRiden/  UPCOMING GUESTS:

August 25th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page September 1st Psychic Joanne Leo | Numerology/astrology/angel cards reading from the heart www.psychicjoanneleo.com   September 8th Jeremy Riden | Cards and intuitive readings https://divinesparkministries.com/about-jeremy-riden   September 15th  Gosia Lorenz| Clearing negative entities and intuitive readings www.gosialorenz.com   September 22nd Ayla Murray | Tarot/Angel Cards and intuitive readings https://www.facebook.com/harmonicperspective/   September 29th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page  

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

Nightly prayers include COVID-19. Each night we work on scrambling the frequency for everyone on the prayer list. Your name will be added to a special VIP Prayer list where Jimmy will use his intelligent computer software, src4you which runs 24/7, to delete the negative and increase the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of favorable outcomes for you.  

In addition, throughout the full 30-days, Jimmy will be dialing into your energetic signature each day upon rising and make certain that you are a clear yes, unclear to no and running forward before you start your day. He is doing the heavy lifting for you around 3am NY time while most of you are asleep in order to smooth out your way and increase your most favorable life outcomes.

The 30-day service is now being offered exclusively  and you also have the option of selecting an ongoing subscription ($95/month) which is managed through PayPal only.

Upon written email request, for each new order we offer a one-time email analysis via the intelligent healing software that Jimmy uses on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes!

You can add yourself and those living in your immediate household and yes you can include pets! Merely include everyone’s names and Jimmy will add them to his daily prayers. *NOTE if the MDP Service was purchased via a special telesummit or radio show offer, prayers will be limited to BUYER ONLY - and will not include family members or pets.

You can run this monthly and stop at any time after the 30 days is up, you will have the opportunity to renew and update your list each month but are under no obligation. I believe you will experience magical transformations and make progress every day! 

Sign Up for 30-Days - $99

 Tampa Office Sessions

FRIDAY KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS 

Friday sessions are back to being phone-only for folks that I usually see at Kodawari until further notice. You can book time with me in the shop and schedule online.   3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa ☎️ (813) 999-1874 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! Click here to watch the Mastery video playlist

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better. Don't forget... you can share these with you immediate friends and family.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe COVID-19 Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Improving Sex Improving Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Windfall Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

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Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​​​ Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2020 All Rights Reserved  

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[divinefishingtips]

TGIWednesday and party like it's MY birthday

TGIWednesday News

Today is my birthday and yes, this is how I feel as my g'daughter Charlie represents another year has come and gone!  Where does it go?  I have a movie star client that always says, “The days are long but the years fly by!”  The ultimate lessons that I have learned over time are as my sweet momma always said, “I don’t do rush.” So slow it down a bit and don’t hurry up into anything or anyone!  Know that I appreciate you and every birthday. I am now making every effort to receive personal self-care, whether it’s a haircut/massage/reading or other.  And with all of my birthdays I like to treat others...  

So here you go in celebration of my birthday on August 19th we have activated a Special 19% off Discount on ALL Audio MP3 and eBooks in the shop for the next 19 hours!  You'll see the price adjustment after you Add To Cart and begin Checkout.  This deal will be gone in a FLASH so don't delay!  Go here now and have fun shopping!  (*sessions/prayers zoom videos and certification are NOT included - time runs out at 6pm ET/ 3pm PT on Thursday the 20th) Make it fun today and every day and know that I appreciate you and I plan on having my version of fun too!

Get Jimmy's Bday19 Discount Here!

TGIWednesday Download

~ CLEARING YOUR DAY AND EVERY DAY ~ I believe, think, know and feel that my day today is Clear. I know, when, where, how and why to release my day today from unclear.  I am ready, willing and able to have everything today in this very day, running forward with grace and ease and I am asking in all time lines and languages and so it is.

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

AUGUST 19th- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! Birthday Greetings from my Inbox: "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, listen my tooth is really bothering me and I have another dentist appointment tomorrow but I am hoping to get with you today to get rid of this pain and anxiety, so get me in on your first available, K?. "Happy Birthday, do you think my resumé is being received because the recruiters act skittish and I am wondering if it’s just me or the whole state of Florida? Can we schedule? "Jimmy, Happy Birthday my dear friend, I hope you are having a blast and I know that traditionally you don’t schedule clients on your birthday, but I am hoping you will make an exception for me because I just got back from the doctor, hit me back. "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, I forgot that you are a fellow Leo like me, listen, I cannot find my car keys anywhere.....Thoughts? Hints? Impressions? "Happy Birthday buddy, I know you’re not working today but my anxiety and loneliness is at a new level, honestly we have to get together ASAP anything available noonish today? Call, text or email asap. "Jimmy, I know that you’ve been working on me for attracting more women and I REALLY want to get with this new girl. I don’t think I told you that I found out her husband’s name is the same as mine and now she’s acting all cold towards me. Do you think that all the attractive good mojo stuff you’ve been sending my way went to the wrong Phillip? I know it’s like midnight but call me ASAP." Daily Affirmation: "Today I will remember that we have choices. That "No" can be a one word sentence. That other people are generally self-absorbed and that I can make the choice to buy into that as a belief and or as much as a choice that they have made. Today I will choose peace and quiet."   

From the Fish Box

"Good morning Jimmy, When I woke up early this morning my cat still hadn't come home. So I got dressed and went to go look for her. After 45-min and feeling into where she was, I stood at a spot quietly calling (as it still was really early) and suddenly she started meowing from somewhere and found her way to me. After a bit of saying hello, she led the way home. So, she's back and I'm happy ;) Thanks for the session and assistance yesterday. It helped a lot!" - Nicky

From Jimmy: Some of you may have read on Facebook that MY sweet black male cat "Kitty" has been missing for over a week.  If you can offer your prayers for his safe and quick return, we sure could use them!  🙏  It would be the best birthday present ever!!

Monthly LIVE Zoom Event

Next MySwitchWorks Live Zoom Event Wednesday August 26th 7:30-8pm ET August: Themes of Loss

Have you recently suffered a loss of work, a loved one in spirit, lost innocence, lost health, lost youth and vitality?

Let’s have this one be about what you feel you’ve lost and what you’d like to reclaim!  Gainful employment, peace, restored zest for life etc...  Send in your Top 3 to support@jimmymackhealing.com (please do not reply to the confirmation email)

Register Here for August - $22

LIVE Appearances - Free Healing

Thursday Sept. 23rd - The Global Gathering

with host Dipal Shah. The Gathering is an online spiritual event in which multiple healers, lightworkers, catalysts and spiritual teachers come together as ONE to support humanity by anchoring love, light, joy, wellness and optimism.    Join Us and Watch Online!   

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show

NEW VIDEO FORMAT! WATCH IT LIVE  TUESDAY'S at 4pm EDT / 1pm PDT Watch and Participate (via Comments) during the Live TV Show streamed on Goldylocks Productions YouTube Channel, Facebook Page and Periscope.   NOTE: You will need to log into your YouTube (Google) or Facebook accounts to comment. If you watch the Live show from any other location other than the 3 listed below, your comments will not be seen by the Show Host or Producer. https://www.facebook.com/GoldylocksProductions https://www.pscp.tv/Goldylocks168/follow Or watch all live and replays in the archives here: https://thejimmymackhealingshow.com/

Instructions for the VIEWERS: 1.    One reading/message per person. The first question posted will be answered, so please think about your question carefully before posting it.  2.    If you want a longer and more detailed message, please book an appointment with the Show Host.  3.    Spirit does come through and gives messages that can apply to many, not just the person asking the question. 4.    It is not required nor should be expected that every question or comment will be addressed by the Show Host. 5.    If you have any issues with the show host or show format, please contact the Show Producer... not the Show Host. 6.    Contact the Show Producer, Rev. Tiffany White Sage Woman via email: goldylocksproductions@hotmail.com Yesterday's Show - Watch the replay here! Special Guest Jeremy Riden  Divine Spark Ministries https://www.facebook.com/JeremyRiden/  UPCOMING GUESTS:

August 25th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page September 1st Psychic Joanne Leo | Numerology/astrology/angel cards reading from the heart www.psychicjoanneleo.com   September 8th Jeremy Riden | Cards and intuitive readings https://divinesparkministries.com/about-jeremy-riden   September 15th  Gosia Lorenz| Clearing negative entities and intuitive readings www.gosialorenz.com   September 22nd Ayla Murray | Tarot/Angel Cards and intuitive readings https://www.facebook.com/harmonicperspective/   September 29th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page  

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

Nightly prayers include COVID-19. Each night we work on scrambling the frequency for everyone on the prayer list. Your name will be added to a special VIP Prayer list where Jimmy will use his intelligent computer software, src4you which runs 24/7, to delete the negative and increase the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of favorable outcomes for you.  

In addition, throughout the full 30-days, Jimmy will be dialing into your energetic signature each day upon rising and make certain that you are a clear yes, unclear to no and running forward before you start your day. He is doing the heavy lifting for you around 3am NY time while most of you are asleep in order to smooth out your way and increase your most favorable life outcomes.

The 30-day service is now being offered exclusively  and you also have the option of selecting an ongoing subscription ($95/month) which is managed through PayPal only.

Upon written email request, for each new order we offer a one-time email analysis via the intelligent healing software that Jimmy uses on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes!

You can add yourself and those living in your immediate household and yes you can include pets! Merely include everyone’s names and Jimmy will add them to his daily prayers. *NOTE if the MDP Service was purchased via a special telesummit or radio show offer, prayers will be limited to BUYER ONLY - and will not include family members or pets.

You can run this monthly and stop at any time after the 30 days is up, you will have the opportunity to renew and update your list each month but are under no obligation. I believe you will experience magical transformations and make progress every day! 

Sign Up for 30-Days - $99

 Tampa Office Sessions

FRIDAY KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS 

Friday sessions are back to being phone-only for folks that I usually see at Kodawari until further notice. You can book time with me in the shop and schedule online.   3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa ☎️ (813) 999-1874 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! Click here to watch the Mastery video playlist

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better. Don't forget... you can share these with you immediate friends and family.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe COVID-19 Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Improving Sex Improving Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Windfall Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Share

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Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​​​ Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2020 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[365dailyaffirmations]

TGIWednesday and party like it's MY birthday

TGIWednesday News

Today is my birthday and yes, this is how I feel as my g'daughter Charlie represents another year has come and gone!  Where does it go?  I have a movie star client that always says, “The days are long but the years fly by!”  The ultimate lessons that I have learned over time are as my sweet momma always said, “I don’t do rush.” So slow it down a bit and don’t hurry up into anything or anyone!  Know that I appreciate you and every birthday. I am now making every effort to receive personal self-care, whether it’s a haircut/massage/reading or other.  And with all of my birthdays I like to treat others...  

So here you go in celebration of my birthday on August 19th we have activated a Special 19% off Discount on ALL Audio MP3 and eBooks in the shop for the next 19 hours!  You'll see the price adjustment after you Add To Cart and begin Checkout.  This deal will be gone in a FLASH so don't delay!  Go here now and have fun shopping!  (*sessions/prayers zoom videos and certification are NOT included - time runs out at 6pm ET/ 3pm PT on Thursday the 20th) Make it fun today and every day and know that I appreciate you and I plan on having my version of fun too!

Get Jimmy's Bday19 Discount Here!

TGIWednesday Download

~ CLEARING YOUR DAY AND EVERY DAY ~ I believe, think, know and feel that my day today is Clear. I know, when, where, how and why to release my day today from unclear.  I am ready, willing and able to have everything today in this very day, running forward with grace and ease and I am asking in all time lines and languages and so it is.

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

AUGUST 19th- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! Birthday Greetings from my Inbox: "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, listen my tooth is really bothering me and I have another dentist appointment tomorrow but I am hoping to get with you today to get rid of this pain and anxiety, so get me in on your first available, K?. "Happy Birthday, do you think my resumé is being received because the recruiters act skittish and I am wondering if it’s just me or the whole state of Florida? Can we schedule? "Jimmy, Happy Birthday my dear friend, I hope you are having a blast and I know that traditionally you don’t schedule clients on your birthday, but I am hoping you will make an exception for me because I just got back from the doctor, hit me back. "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, I forgot that you are a fellow Leo like me, listen, I cannot find my car keys anywhere.....Thoughts? Hints? Impressions? "Happy Birthday buddy, I know you’re not working today but my anxiety and loneliness is at a new level, honestly we have to get together ASAP anything available noonish today? Call, text or email asap. "Jimmy, I know that you’ve been working on me for attracting more women and I REALLY want to get with this new girl. I don’t think I told you that I found out her husband’s name is the same as mine and now she’s acting all cold towards me. Do you think that all the attractive good mojo stuff you’ve been sending my way went to the wrong Phillip? I know it’s like midnight but call me ASAP." Daily Affirmation: "Today I will remember that we have choices. That "No" can be a one word sentence. That other people are generally self-absorbed and that I can make the choice to buy into that as a belief and or as much as a choice that they have made. Today I will choose peace and quiet."   

From the Fish Box

"Good morning Jimmy, When I woke up early this morning my cat still hadn't come home. So I got dressed and went to go look for her. After 45-min and feeling into where she was, I stood at a spot quietly calling (as it still was really early) and suddenly she started meowing from somewhere and found her way to me. After a bit of saying hello, she led the way home. So, she's back and I'm happy ;) Thanks for the session and assistance yesterday. It helped a lot!" - Nicky

From Jimmy: Some of you may have read on Facebook that MY sweet black male cat "Kitty" has been missing for over a week.  If you can offer your prayers for his safe and quick return, we sure could use them!  🙏  It would be the best birthday present ever!!

Monthly LIVE Zoom Event

Next MySwitchWorks Live Zoom Event Wednesday August 26th 7:30-8pm ET August: Themes of Loss

Have you recently suffered a loss of work, a loved one in spirit, lost innocence, lost health, lost youth and vitality?

Let’s have this one be about what you feel you’ve lost and what you’d like to reclaim!  Gainful employment, peace, restored zest for life etc...  Send in your Top 3 to support@jimmymackhealing.com (please do not reply to the confirmation email)

Register Here for August - $22

LIVE Appearances - Free Healing

Thursday Sept. 23rd - The Global Gathering

with host Dipal Shah. The Gathering is an online spiritual event in which multiple healers, lightworkers, catalysts and spiritual teachers come together as ONE to support humanity by anchoring love, light, joy, wellness and optimism.    Join Us and Watch Online!   

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show

NEW VIDEO FORMAT! WATCH IT LIVE  TUESDAY'S at 4pm EDT / 1pm PDT Watch and Participate (via Comments) during the Live TV Show streamed on Goldylocks Productions YouTube Channel, Facebook Page and Periscope.   NOTE: You will need to log into your YouTube (Google) or Facebook accounts to comment. If you watch the Live show from any other location other than the 3 listed below, your comments will not be seen by the Show Host or Producer. https://www.facebook.com/GoldylocksProductions https://www.pscp.tv/Goldylocks168/follow Or watch all live and replays in the archives here: https://thejimmymackhealingshow.com/

Instructions for the VIEWERS: 1.    One reading/message per person. The first question posted will be answered, so please think about your question carefully before posting it.  2.    If you want a longer and more detailed message, please book an appointment with the Show Host.  3.    Spirit does come through and gives messages that can apply to many, not just the person asking the question. 4.    It is not required nor should be expected that every question or comment will be addressed by the Show Host. 5.    If you have any issues with the show host or show format, please contact the Show Producer... not the Show Host. 6.    Contact the Show Producer, Rev. Tiffany White Sage Woman via email: goldylocksproductions@hotmail.com Yesterday's Show - Watch the replay here! Special Guest Jeremy Riden  Divine Spark Ministries https://www.facebook.com/JeremyRiden/  UPCOMING GUESTS:

August 25th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page September 1st Psychic Joanne Leo | Numerology/astrology/angel cards reading from the heart www.psychicjoanneleo.com   September 8th Jeremy Riden | Cards and intuitive readings https://divinesparkministries.com/about-jeremy-riden   September 15th  Gosia Lorenz| Clearing negative entities and intuitive readings www.gosialorenz.com   September 22nd Ayla Murray | Tarot/Angel Cards and intuitive readings https://www.facebook.com/harmonicperspective/   September 29th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page  

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

Nightly prayers include COVID-19. Each night we work on scrambling the frequency for everyone on the prayer list. Your name will be added to a special VIP Prayer list where Jimmy will use his intelligent computer software, src4you which runs 24/7, to delete the negative and increase the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of favorable outcomes for you.  

In addition, throughout the full 30-days, Jimmy will be dialing into your energetic signature each day upon rising and make certain that you are a clear yes, unclear to no and running forward before you start your day. He is doing the heavy lifting for you around 3am NY time while most of you are asleep in order to smooth out your way and increase your most favorable life outcomes.

The 30-day service is now being offered exclusively  and you also have the option of selecting an ongoing subscription ($95/month) which is managed through PayPal only.

Upon written email request, for each new order we offer a one-time email analysis via the intelligent healing software that Jimmy uses on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes!

You can add yourself and those living in your immediate household and yes you can include pets! Merely include everyone’s names and Jimmy will add them to his daily prayers. *NOTE if the MDP Service was purchased via a special telesummit or radio show offer, prayers will be limited to BUYER ONLY - and will not include family members or pets.

You can run this monthly and stop at any time after the 30 days is up, you will have the opportunity to renew and update your list each month but are under no obligation. I believe you will experience magical transformations and make progress every day! 

Sign Up for 30-Days - $99

 Tampa Office Sessions

FRIDAY KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS 

Friday sessions are back to being phone-only for folks that I usually see at Kodawari until further notice. You can book time with me in the shop and schedule online.   3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa ☎️ (813) 999-1874 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! Click here to watch the Mastery video playlist

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better. Don't forget... you can share these with you immediate friends and family.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe COVID-19 Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Improving Sex Improving Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Windfall Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​​​ Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2020 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[advancedthetapractitioner]

TGIWednesday and party like it's MY birthday

View this email online

TGIWednesday News

Today is my birthday and yes, this is how I feel as my g'daughter Charlie represents another year has come and gone!  Where does it go?  I have a movie star client that always says, “The days are long but the years fly by!”  The ultimate lessons that I have learned over time are as my sweet momma always said, “I don’t do rush.” So slow it down a bit and don’t hurry up into anything or anyone!  Know that I appreciate you and every birthday. I am now making every effort to receive personal self-care, whether it’s a haircut/massage/reading or other.  And with all of my birthdays I like to treat others...  

So here you go in celebration of my birthday on August 19th we have activated a Special 19% off Discount on ALL Audio MP3 and eBooks in the shop for the next 19 hours!  You'll see the price adjustment after you Add To Cart and begin Checkout.  This deal will be gone in a FLASH so don't delay!  Go here now and have fun shopping!  (*sessions/prayers zoom videos and certification are NOT included - time runs out at 6pm ET/ 3pm PT on Thursday the 20th) Make it fun today and every day and know that I appreciate you and I plan on having my version of fun too!

Get Jimmy's Bday19 Discount Here!

TGIWednesday Download

~ CLEARING YOUR DAY AND EVERY DAY ~ I believe, think, know and feel that my day today is Clear. I know, when, where, how and why to release my day today from unclear.  I am ready, willing and able to have everything today in this very day, running forward with grace and ease and I am asking in all time lines and languages and so it is.

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

AUGUST 19th- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! Birthday Greetings from my Inbox: "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, listen my tooth is really bothering me and I have another dentist appointment tomorrow but I am hoping to get with you today to get rid of this pain and anxiety, so get me in on your first available, K?. "Happy Birthday, do you think my resumé is being received because the recruiters act skittish and I am wondering if it’s just me or the whole state of Florida? Can we schedule? "Jimmy, Happy Birthday my dear friend, I hope you are having a blast and I know that traditionally you don’t schedule clients on your birthday, but I am hoping you will make an exception for me because I just got back from the doctor, hit me back. "Jimmy, Happy Birthday, I forgot that you are a fellow Leo like me, listen, I cannot find my car keys anywhere.....Thoughts? Hints? Impressions? "Happy Birthday buddy, I know you’re not working today but my anxiety and loneliness is at a new level, honestly we have to get together ASAP anything available noonish today? Call, text or email asap. "Jimmy, I know that you’ve been working on me for attracting more women and I REALLY want to get with this new girl. I don’t think I told you that I found out her husband’s name is the same as mine and now she’s acting all cold towards me. Do you think that all the attractive good mojo stuff you’ve been sending my way went to the wrong Phillip? I know it’s like midnight but call me ASAP." Daily Affirmation: "Today I will remember that we have choices. That "No" can be a one word sentence. That other people are generally self-absorbed and that I can make the choice to buy into that as a belief and or as much as a choice that they have made. Today I will choose peace and quiet."   

From the Fish Box

"Good morning Jimmy, When I woke up early this morning my cat still hadn't come home. So I got dressed and went to go look for her. After 45-min and feeling into where she was, I stood at a spot quietly calling (as it still was really early) and suddenly she started meowing from somewhere and found her way to me. After a bit of saying hello, she led the way home. So, she's back and I'm happy ;) Thanks for the session and assistance yesterday. It helped a lot!" - Nicky

From Jimmy: Some of you may have read on Facebook that MY sweet black male cat "Kitty" has been missing for over a week.  If you can offer your prayers for his safe and quick return, we sure could use them!  🙏  It would be the best birthday present ever!!

Monthly LIVE Zoom Event

Next MySwitchWorks Live Zoom Event Wednesday August 26th 7:30-8pm ET August: Themes of Loss

Have you recently suffered a loss of work, a loved one in spirit, lost innocence, lost health, lost youth and vitality?

Let’s have this one be about what you feel you’ve lost and what you’d like to reclaim!  Gainful employment, peace, restored zest for life etc...  Send in your Top 3 to support@jimmymackhealing.com (please do not reply to the confirmation email)

Register Here for August - $22

LIVE Appearances - Free Healing

Thursday Sept. 23rd - The Global Gathering

with host Dipal Shah. The Gathering is an online spiritual event in which multiple healers, lightworkers, catalysts and spiritual teachers come together as ONE to support humanity by anchoring love, light, joy, wellness and optimism.    Join Us and Watch Online!   

The Jimmy Mack Healing Show

NEW VIDEO FORMAT! WATCH IT LIVE  TUESDAY'S at 4pm EDT / 1pm PDT Watch and Participate (via Comments) during the Live TV Show streamed on Goldylocks Productions YouTube Channel, Facebook Page and Periscope.   NOTE: You will need to log into your YouTube (Google) or Facebook accounts to comment. If you watch the Live show from any other location other than the 3 listed below, your comments will not be seen by the Show Host or Producer. https://www.facebook.com/GoldylocksProductions https://www.pscp.tv/Goldylocks168/follow Or watch all live and replays in the archives here: https://thejimmymackhealingshow.com/

Instructions for the VIEWERS: 1.    One reading/message per person. The first question posted will be answered, so please think about your question carefully before posting it.  2.    If you want a longer and more detailed message, please book an appointment with the Show Host.  3.    Spirit does come through and gives messages that can apply to many, not just the person asking the question. 4.    It is not required nor should be expected that every question or comment will be addressed by the Show Host. 5.    If you have any issues with the show host or show format, please contact the Show Producer... not the Show Host. 6.    Contact the Show Producer, Rev. Tiffany White Sage Woman via email: goldylocksproductions@hotmail.com Yesterday's Show - Watch the replay here! Special Guest Jeremy Riden  Divine Spark Ministries https://www.facebook.com/JeremyRiden/  UPCOMING GUESTS:

August 25th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page September 1st Psychic Joanne Leo | Numerology/astrology/angel cards reading from the heart www.psychicjoanneleo.com   September 8th Jeremy Riden | Cards and intuitive readings https://divinesparkministries.com/about-jeremy-riden   September 15th  Gosia Lorenz| Clearing negative entities and intuitive readings www.gosialorenz.com   September 22nd Ayla Murray | Tarot/Angel Cards and intuitive readings https://www.facebook.com/harmonicperspective/   September 29th Rev Debbie | Our resident trans medium communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit her Facebook page  

Receive 24/7 Prayers from Jimmy

Nightly prayers include COVID-19. Each night we work on scrambling the frequency for everyone on the prayer list. Your name will be added to a special VIP Prayer list where Jimmy will use his intelligent computer software, src4you which runs 24/7, to delete the negative and increase the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of favorable outcomes for you.  

In addition, throughout the full 30-days, Jimmy will be dialing into your energetic signature each day upon rising and make certain that you are a clear yes, unclear to no and running forward before you start your day. He is doing the heavy lifting for you around 3am NY time while most of you are asleep in order to smooth out your way and increase your most favorable life outcomes.

The 30-day service is now being offered exclusively  and you also have the option of selecting an ongoing subscription ($95/month) which is managed through PayPal only.

Upon written email request, for each new order we offer a one-time email analysis via the intelligent healing software that Jimmy uses on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes!

You can add yourself and those living in your immediate household and yes you can include pets! Merely include everyone’s names and Jimmy will add them to his daily prayers. *NOTE if the MDP Service was purchased via a special telesummit or radio show offer, prayers will be limited to BUYER ONLY - and will not include family members or pets.

You can run this monthly and stop at any time after the 30 days is up, you will have the opportunity to renew and update your list each month but are under no obligation. I believe you will experience magical transformations and make progress every day! 

Sign Up for 30-Days - $99

 Tampa Office Sessions

FRIDAY KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS 

Friday sessions are back to being phone-only for folks that I usually see at Kodawari until further notice. You can book time with me in the shop and schedule online.   3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa ☎️ (813) 999-1874 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! Click here to watch the Mastery video playlist

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. 

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better. Don't forget... you can share these with you immediate friends and family.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe COVID-19 Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Improving Sex Improving Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Windfall Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​​​ Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2020 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[mortalkombat4]

All evens

hey anon did you know i love you for interacting with thishell fucking yeah i’m doing this and...without a cut bc i’m on mobile and i don’t know how oh god sorry2: do you forgive the last person who hurt you?yeah i do tbh4: what’s something you really want right now?to have the balls to make out with the person i like instead of hovering Lmao6: do you like the beach?i do! however i much prefer lakes? like. great lakes tho not gross lakes. great lakes are like the beach but without the saltwater it’s honestly the best8: what’s the background on your cell?well my lock screen is klance but my home screen is me and @senpajs bc i’m too emotional at all times10: do you like your phone?yeah!12: who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?a kid named asher in my musical theater class bc i needed him to send me a video14: which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?i think this question is too vague but uhhh i guess emotional pain tends to have longer lasting effects?16: are you tired?for once in my life? no! my mom worked on xmas so our family xmas is tomorrow so it’s like christmas eve for me and i’m Pumped18: is your first phone contact a relative?i mean first person i ever added in my phone was my mom so ig if that’s whomst you mean then yes?20: when did you last talk to the person you last kissed?approximately ten minutes ago about how cassandra from tangled the series is a lesbian22: would you kiss the person you last kissed again?yes please24: is there a certain quote you live by?i don’t live by anything so jot that down26: do you have any tattoos?yep! i have a phoenix quarter sleeve on my upper left arm (it matches my mom’s) and a heartbeat line with a rainbow heart on my right wrist28: next time you will kiss someone on the lips?hopefully thursday, at the latest new year’s eve if he still likes me lmao30: have you ever kissed the last person you kissed on a couch?:) yep32: do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?mhmm! and he’s my best friend too34: has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?yes i have heard this one!36: were you single on valentine’s day?i’ve lived seventeen years on this god forsaken planet and never once had a valentine38: what do your friends call you?my only Usual nickname is kenzie, though i’ve gotten zee, mack, and mom before a few times so40: have you ever cried over a text?like a billion times tbh i mean who hasn’t42: what is your last bruise from?FUCK IF I KNOW! it appeared on my fucking arm out of nowhere!!! what happened!!!44: who was the last person you were on the phone with?texting? @senpajs calling? my mom46: do you wear hats if you’re having a bad hair day?beanies are a godsend yes48: do you make supper for your family?every once in a while, though i usually bake more than cook50: top 3 web pages?most likely tumblr, ao3, and youtube52: does anything on your body hurt?my mouth! i got a canker sore that hates me (i’m getting a medicine for it tomorrow thank god) and my braces are acting up so my mouth hurts like a motherfucker54: what was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?i literally do this so often that i don’t know...probably diet coke56: what do you usually do first thing in the morning?i scroll through twitter or tumblr for a few minutes to wake up my mind tbh58: were you single in january of 2007?bitch i was seven so...yes60: when’s the next time you will give someone a big hug?probs my little sister on thursday when i go stop her back off at her mental health center62: when will be the next time you text someone?most likely whenever i think of something dumb but feel the need to share it with my best friend anyways64: what were you doing at 8 this morning?looking up canker sore cures :(66: is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?@senpajs68: what was your last thought before you went to bed last night?“i’m too tired to translate the spanish music right now”70: how many windows are open on your computer?only 2!!72: what is your ringtone?my phone is constantly on vibrate so i quite genuinely could not tell you74: where is your mom right now?in her room watching kennedy center awards or smth76: have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?not in that time span nope!78: do you remember who you had a crush on in seventh grade?a lanky minecraft loving boy with a bieber haircut named keller whomst eventually became my first boyfriend80: have you ever fallen asleep in someone’s arms?i’ve fallen asleep holding hands with someone but no not in anyone’s arms...god that sounds nice82: has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?not that i know of84: you’re drunk and yelling at hot people out of your car window, who are you with?i literally cannot see myself ever getting into this situation but. i guess my friend kiri if i must pick someone86: what was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to go see a movie?i cried because of carrie fisher88: if someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?only if the butterfly was dead :( this question makes me sad90: have you ever trusted someone too much?ndnksndksbdjs my autobiography will be out in just a bit no spoilers92: do you get along with girls?yeah! i support and love girls94: does sex mean love?this very much depends on the people involved. it can, but it doesn’t have to!96: have you ever kissed someone with a lip ring?not yet98: everybody has someone that makes them happy, do you?@senpajs100: who was the last person you pinky promised?i literally don’t know lmaorip anyone who had to read this i’m so sorry

[shorthaircutsmodels]

Emma Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles - 15+ - https://shorthaircutsmodels.com/emma-williss-short-haircuts-and-hairstyles/ - Emma Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, is low maintenance and you have a chíc hairstyle to yourself without too much fuss. So whether you prefer world oysters to sleek shiny style with textured tresses or Matt Willis's wife's hair. Only some of us are lucky enough to try this jazzy hairstyle, so if you have a face, here's how to get Emma Willis's 2020 - 2021 haircut. Both the cut and colour of Emma Willis's trendy children's cut hairstyle play out the rare and unexpected grey blue colour of her almond-shaped eyes. Emma Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles Emma Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, The darkness of the jet black strands throws back flashes of the cameras and contrasts with the steel grey of their gaze. She is free to exhibit the metal stud that pierced the cartilage of her upper ear by parting her hair to the side and leaving her ears bare. Not everyone is brave enough to wear a children's cut or pierce their ears for that matter. But then not everyone is fearless beauty Emma Willis. Presenter Emma Willis impressed fans on social media with an entirely new hairstyle for tonight's episode of the Voice. Emma Willis's Haircuts and Hairstyles Emma Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, Taking to Instagram Saturday 2020, the star shared a series of behind-the-scenes shots, including two photos showing the Natural Silver of her short hair glowing. Regis creative director Guy Cammarano and Katy Banks are a member of the Regis artistic team, guiding you on how to create Emma's famous pixie crop. Emma Willis has had a few hairstyles in recent years. Emma Willis Emma Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, He gained a reputation as a distinguished television presenter. But the British television presenter and model is privately known for her unique appearance and charming character. Rumours and rumours about the 44-year-old's haircut are constantly attracting the attention of celebrity magazines and tabloids. Look at Emma Willis ' old hair in the picture gallery. Likes suits and hair. another said. The star hairdresser, who regularly works with Vicky McClure, has previously said Hello. Emma Willis's Short Haircuts Emma Louise Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, Emma's decision to go blonde was not a whim. He said it's something we've been working on for a long time. I developed a hair technique called Spotlight color, which is really about personalizing the hair color you have. We are doing a kind of gradual process from dark to light, he added. We performed on stage last year. Emma Willis's Short Hairstyles Emma Louise Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, Sometimes pulling dark hair into a blonde can be quite damaging, so the spotlight protects the technique against it. Emma's signature style is so in demand now Louis is often asked how to recreate it. I said If you're going to go for it you really have to make the decision that you really want to do it. The delivery babies presenter is currently wearing her short hair in a gorgeous platinum blonde shade, though of course she also loves experimenting with her colour. Emma Willis's Haircuts Emma Louise Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, She's been slowly getting blonde and blonde over the past year, and Emma Willis has revealed an entirely new look in the opening episode of Circle 2022. Emma Willis new hairstyle Emma, who was known for her brief dark fairy crop when she stepped out sporting a swishy blonde ponytail, eagerly wowed waiting viewers on series two of the Channel Four reality show filmed in Salford. Emma Willis's Hairstyles Emma Louise Willis's Short Haircuts and Hairstyles, The presenter's ice blonde locks were pulled back into a pony for the return of the apartment as she rocked a stunning ' Kill Bill-style yellow suit. Emma Willis hair style Emma shared several snaps of herself on Instagram and her followers loved the new colour and style. Celebrity Big Brother is on. And we're all excited. Here's the Hair Boutique we're not just loving celeb drama we're loving hair. Emma Willis's Short Hair Not only does she have great character, but she also has great hair. Most people are afraid of chops and Pixie is afraid of the brave. Others saw it as limiting and boring. But more people want Willis. His cut is versatile and he pulls off numerous looks. Emma Willis haircuts From rock chicks to sophisticated chic to glam. This short hair is great fun and proof. The rankings of coaches at The Voice UK suffered a shake-up after it was announced that Meghan Trainor had replaced Jennifer Hudson. Emma Willis's Hair And returning star Olly Murs, 35, showed things are changing on the coiffure front on Monday night as she stepped out with a new bleach blonde hairdo as she attended the show's first blind audition at Manchester's MediaCityUK. Emma Willis hair blonde The Troublemaker singer known for having dark locks since rising to fame bore a resemblance to the show's host Emma Willis whose hair has been worn in a cropped platinum style since late last year. Emma Willis short hair back view Olly stepped out in stylish style for the big event wearing a black tuxedo which he teamed with a white shirt with an embellished collar. He struck a series of playful poses as he greeted throngs of fans. Emma Willis bob haircut Lined up outside the venue encouraging them to cheer loudly as he frustrated them. Also flaunting her blonde hairdo host Emma Willis was typically eye-catching in a mixed-texture velvet dress that featured a 43 patent corset. Emma Willis new hair Emma Willis isn't shy about getting a cool girl haircut, which is for sure, and her latest appearance is more expressive than ever. The star's go hairdresser Louis Byrne posted a new snap of Emma on Thursday evening and we love her new updo. Emma Willis haircut Showing off the presenter's shaven bottom cut, Louis pulled Emma's hair back into a tiny ponytail with plenty of texture, of course. Pony and undercut @ emmawillisofficial captioned the. How do I style my short hair like Emma Willis? Photo which appears to have been taken behind the scenes in her latest shoot with fashion brand next. We're not sure if we'll see the style in Emma's next clothing campaign, but we think she looks gorgeous in the same way. Emma Willis haircut 2020 - 2021 Many fans agreed with one post. I want this. Very cool and another addition. Omg I love it. Louis ' next Instagram shot showed him wearing a more typical style, complete with Emma's signature. Emma Willis hair colour It showcases how women can wriggle out of a short nap that is slowly returning to fashion. Look at Emma, let's go over some of the things we think she's going to do to get to her. Emma Willis short haircut Just oblivious told me one stunned follower about the look this hair did not drop the look. Appearance is related to volume and texture. Emma Willis hair how to style To start, we use Volume Shampoo and conditioner to create this structure. We would then go with some wax and texture spray to help hold but finish with some firm hold hairspray to handle the hair and keep. What products does Emma Willis use on her hair? It looking crispy throughout the day. We all know that celebrities can have a huge impact on their styles. Whether we see the latest videos of our favorite singer or a picture of someone we admire papped coming out of. Emma Willis new haircut A restaurant, we'll pull out our scissors and cut out the photo and bring it to the lounge. We've seen a lot of coverage recently for the face of Regis Emma Willis, who was accompanied by Phillip Schofield on this morning. Emma Willis long hair A large number of customers came to our salons asking for an Emma Willis pixie cut, and in the video below you can see how our team at Regis created the emma willis style with short bob hairstyles. She said that. Emma Willis hairdresser There's no point going between half or half of the measures you have to wear with confidence and pride. Go to someone who knows what they're doing and make sure it suits your hair texture. How does Emma Willis style her hair? Tuesday September 24 Tuesday when Season Two debuted on Tuesday Emma Willis stunned hoop viewers as she stepped out to host the show in a vibrant blonde long ponytail. After rocking the short dark ' make for years Emma's new look divided some viewers but her sleek long hair looked incredible. Emma Willis hairstyles 2020 - 2021 Since the launch show Emma has continued to rock her blonde hair in a range of styles, often opting for a chic messy bun or low pony. The Channel 4 presenter has pulled out a number of hair colours over the. Emma Willis hair products Years but it is by far the most drastic change of her recent shade. We took a look at Emma's iconic hairstyles. Emma's latest style is an ice blonde tied up in a neat long ponytail for the spin of the circle. How do you style a pixie haircut? Before returning to the Reality show Emma shared several snaps of herself on Instagram revealing her new look and loved the new colour to her followers. If there's one style can be recognised for, it's her edgy cropped hair. How to get Emma Willis hair Another full-length photo showed off her outfit for the latest installment of the hit ITV singing competition. He is known for his short crop as well as presenting all sorts of reality shows over the years such as the voice and Big Brother. So fans were distracted by long blonde locks on the first episode of the second series of the Circle last night. How can a girl get a quiff? The contestants lived in the same building but were only sporting shock to see that blonde hair into high ponytail extensions Willis adapted to social media-based game show viewers to communicate via an online platform. Serves hair blonde ambition Madonna told Twitter user Darren Haywood was soon back. Emma Willis hair 2020 - 2021 The Big Brother presenter, 40, had been growing out of her pixie crop for the past few months but it seems she has decided life with long hair isn't just for her. She took to Instagram last night to reveal she was visiting the hairdresser for a good ol’ chop. And ah mazing looks. How long is Emma Willis hair? Made another strong look on tonight's episode of Channel 4's The Circle Live. The presenter, 43, wore a chic black trouser suit on the show, with a silky trim on the collar. She paired it with gold jewelry and minimal make-up with her hair scraped back into a messy bun.

[chopper-witch]

TV/Movie Quotes (+ out of context class quotes) - prompts for me to write

So I say I take requests but I also don’t because I’m an idiot with the attention span of a leaf in a tornado. If you ever wish to request anything from me, I will gladly take a character + a quote or few from one of these lists (just specify list and number, please). You don’t need to give me a quote, but it helps more than just an idea. I write for most Marvel and Star Wars characters. Quotes below the cut.

Out of Context Class Quotes

“Time is a social construct. So is money.”

“It’s like a cigarette after sex.”

“It’s the only thing I can do short of getting you hooked on cocaine.”

“No rulers goddamit! No! No! No!”

A: “You’re going to give her a stroke.” B: “Can I give it to you now?” C (the professor): “what, the stroke?”

A (prof): “So you did this left to right?” B: “Yeah.” A:“Do you write left to right in your native language.?” B: “…. uh yeah.”

“Isn’t that all kids nowadays?”

“Well you know, I’m a former alcoholic.”

“Why the fuck should I give a shit?”

“The first time I saw Felicity Jones in a movie was when I had my weekly Friday movie night with Jane Fonda.”

“This is just stupid, stupid stupid. But it works.”

“Did I ever tell you about the time I heavily critiqued a play to the director without realizing it?”

“That’s a great fucking idea.”

“He’s talking about masturbation.”

“I know I swear a whole fucking lot.”

“Oh goddamit, my car’s about to be towed. Twenty minute break guys.”

“I never liked her.”

“Here you go, just gonna give you an F anyway.”

“Want to know why cocaine is a business man’s drug?”

“I mean, cocaine is always a good plan.”

“People live there?”

“Just shooting the shit at Foxy Loxy’s.”

“Why do all YouTube videos have the same stupid song?”

“Sorry, gotta fix this before I can keep lecturing. It’s not centered properly.”

“There are only nine of you!”

“While I don’t condone drug usage…”

“She who shall not be named…”

“I don’t know what got on that table but it isn’t coming off and this room needs to be spotless for the weekend.”

“Uh-uh. No ID, no entrance.”

“Oh yah, that room is confirmed haunted.”

“I heard the ghost started the dryer fire.”

“Did they ever catch the person who vandalized the statue with googly eyes?”

“If you think about it, you park anywhere near here for just $150.”

“It’s cupcake day on Thursday.”

“You either wake or die.”

“He’s turning his mother into a whore.”

“When we deal with our desires instead of our needs we’re in deep shit.”

“His use of surprise.”

“She who shall not be named could come here and fire me.”

“I’m motivated by making obscene amounts of money.”

“Well if you haven’t seen Alien then you might as well pack it up and go home right now - it’s a required watch.”

“Come on, open up, just you and me baby.”

“I’m going to send a bug report and then turn you into lizard.”

“The bug farm is for you if you don’t open up.”

“I don’t want to click on it i just wanna look at it… devices and drives yeah.”

“Have you seen ‘All is True’? Nope. I’ve seen whoops!”

“It’s saturday night cosmic fuck time.”

“What does that mean? The fuck if I know.”

“Keep going back in until less and less people come out.”

“I see the cult status dropping”

“I’m way too talented to be here”

A: “what is happening up there right now? They’re ruining this!” B: “I think someone has a horse.”  

“That’s cause you came late, 30 - no not even - 38 minutes late!” 

“So we have a little occult in here.”

“Follow me to Arizona, live amongst the sand dunes, eat flesh, worship the lack of water.”

“We’re going to call this culty.”

A: “Did you get a haircut?” B: “I took a shower.” 

“Bless you my child”

“I know... I don’t know what day it is.”

“It’s locked up, it’s not letting me do anything.”

“Maybe we’ll just sit here, staring at each other for the next 30 minutes.”

“It’s German, pretty German, ah.”

“So it happened.”

“Someone said no, I don’t like you.”

“That’s pretty good, pretty culty.”

GOT

“The gods aren’t down here, just the six of us, you here me?” 

“I wish I was the monster all of you think I am.” 

“Yes. All men must die. But we are not men.” 

“If you think this has a happy ending, you haven’t been paying attention.” 

“Not at all what I intended. You see, I had never seen the poison work before. Tell [name]. I want her to know it was me.” 

“I grew up with soldiers. I learned how to die a long time ago.” 

“You know nothing, [name].” 

“I’m not going to stop the wheel. I’m going to break the wheel.” 

“Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.”

“There’s no cure for being a cunt.” 

“Power resides where men believe it resides. It's a trick, a shadow on the wall.”

“We’re late for dinner as it is.” “You’re very respectful.” “I’m very hungry.” 

“That’d been a shit way to die.” “As far as I’ve seen they’re all shit ways to die.” 

“I’ve had an exciting life. I want my death to be boring.” 

“This isn’t a strange place, this is my home. It’s the people who are strange.” 

“We both peddle fantasies [name]. Mine just happen to be entertaining.” 

“Please. He’ll punish me.” “You think I care what he does to you?” 

“You are the few. We are the many. And when the many stop fearing the few...” 

“I love her. I love her... and I can’t help her.” 

“If a man knows what he is and remains true to himself the choice is no choice at all. He must fulfill his destiny and become who he is meant to be. However much he may hate it.” 

“It’s easy to confuse what is with what ought to be. Especially when what is has worked out in your favor.”

“In my experience eloquent men are right every bit as often as imbeciles.” 

“Do you know who you are? You’re no one. You’re nothing.”

“So mainly you talk?” “And drink. But I’ve made it so far!”

“I’m here to help. Don’t eat the help.” 

“You’ve lost [name]. It’s the only joy I can find in all this misery.” 

“Lesson number one: assume everyone wants to hit ya. Cause they do [name].” 

“They killed my friends.” “You have friends?” “Not anymore.” 

“That is my plan. You don’t approve?” 

“We obviously didn’t communicate clearly. We’re here to discuss your surrender, not mine.” 

“No one can protect me. No one can protect anyone.” 

“Your words will disappear. Your house will disappear. Your name will disappear. All memory of you will disappear.” 

“For what it’s worth, I have been a cynic for as long as I can remember. Everyone’s always asking me to believe in things - family, gods, kings, myself. It was often tempting until I saw where belief got people. So I said no, thank you to belief. And yet here I am. I believe in you. It’s embarrassing really. I’d swear to my sword, but I don’t actually have a sword.” 

“Doesn’t really roll off the tongue.” “No, but I like it better.”

“They won’t obey you unless they fear you.”

“I am not your enemy. The dead are your enemy.”

“Why did you do that? Doesn’t matter now.”

“Good question.” “I know it’s a good question, I’m looking for an answer.”

“Yet you succeeded, how?” “I read the books and followed the instructions.”

“He really was a cunt, wasn’t he?”

“That was my prize mistake - a failure of imagination.”

“She’s a monster, you do know that?” “To you, I’m sure. To others, I’m sure.”

“You love her. You really do love her. You poor fool. She’ll be the end of you.”

“Will there be pain?” “No, I made sure of that.” “That’s good.”

“You’ve just won the biggest prize in the world, what could you possibly be upset about?”

“See, we pay our debts.” “Right, just not to me.”

“Listen to me, cunt. ’Til I get what I’m owed, a dragon doesn’t get to kill ya, you don’t get to kill ya, only I get to kill ya.”

“You’re fucked.” “Don’t you mean we’re fucked?” “No, I do not. Dragons are where our partnership ends.”

“I have to tell [name].” “May as well jump back in that river.”

“This isn’t a war we can win.” “So what do we do, sue for peace?”

“They’re beautiful aren’t they?” “It wasn’t the word I was thinking of, but… yes, they are. Gorgeous beasts.”

“I haven’t given you permission to leave.” “With respect, your grace, I don’t need permission. I am a king.”

“She wanted to kill me! They would have killed me.” “But they didn’t, did they? So what you whinging about?” “I’m not whinging.” “Your lips are moving and you’re complaining about something. That’s whinging. This one’s been killed six times. You don’t hear him bitching about it.”

“You never would have survived what I survived.” “I guess we’ll never know.”

“How did a mad fucker like you live this long?” “I’m good at killing people.”

“You know what I like about you? You’re not a hero.”

“Every lord I’ve ever met has been a cunt. I don’t know why the Lord of Light would be any different.”

“I do not need to be watched over or minded or care for. I’m not a child, I am [title] and I am home. This is the safest place for me.”

“The most important person in the world can’t fly off to the most dangerous place in the world!” 

“If you die, we’re all lost. Everyone, everything.”

“Dumb cunt. Oh, fuck. Fuck it.”

“Maybe it really is all cocks in the end.” 

“Yes, he’s always been a champion of the downtrodden.” “I think we’re about to be the downtrodden.”

“A pleasant surprise in an unpleasant situation.”

“Come on, you can suck his magic cock later.” 

“What’s in there?” “Fuck off.”

“I thought you were dead.” “Not yet. You came pretty close.”

“The only one that needs protecting is the one that gets in her way.”

“You put yourself at risk.” “I put yourself at risk.”

“Anyone touches it, I’ll kill you first.”

“I left this shit city because I didn’t want to die in it. Am I going to die in this shit city?” “You might.” “And this is all your idea.”

“I think we ought to begin with larger concerns.” “Then why are you talking? You’re the smallest concern here.”

“This isn’t about living in harmony, this is just about living.”

“Oh, fuck loyalty!”

“But have you ever considered learning to lie ever now and then, just a bit?”

“When enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies.”

“That is indeed a problem. The more immediate problem is that we’re fucked.”

”She’ll definitely murder you.”

“She thinks I’m an idiot for trusting you. A lot of people think that actually.” 

“I suppose we should say goodbye, one idiot to another.”

“I have never been more sorry about anything.” “I will not hear it from you. I will not hear it!” 

“You know it in your heart if there’s anything left of it.” 

“It appears Tyrion’s assessment was correct. We’re fucked.” 

“I’ve done plenty of things I regret.” “Not compared to me you haven’t.” “No. Not compared to you.” 

“I loved your mother since the time I was a boy.” “And yet you betrayed her.” “I loved you. More than anyone.” “And yet you betrayed me.”

“I’m just the executioner. You passed the sentence.” 

“I never could have survived what you survived.” “You would have. You’re the strongest person I know.” 

“She never fooled you. You always knew exactly who she was and you loved her anyway.”

“I don’t like heroes.” 

“I know a killer when I see one.”

“Love is the death of duty.” “Sometimes, duty is the death of love.”

“You were exactly where you were supposed to be.”

“See? You’re not the only one who’s clever.”

“Do not become what you struggle to defeat.”

“Many underestimated you. Most of them are dead now.”

“You’re a cold little bitch, aren’t you? Guess that’s why you’re still alive.”

“There it is - ‘trust me’. And it’s you I should trust? Only you? I don’t need trust any longer. I don’t want it and I don’t have room for it.”

“No one can survive in this world without help. No one.”

“Those are brave men knocking at our gates. Let’s go kill them.”

“They will not bend.” “And what happens with things that don’t bend?”

“I will not be a page in someone else’s history book.”

“When it comes to war I fight for [blank]. When it comes to love, I don’t choose sides.”

“They’ll be following you now.” “Who?” “I don’t know. They. They. The ominous they. The man pulling the strings. Or woman.”

“Know your strengths, use them wisely and one man can be worth 10,000.”

“You’re not interesting enough to be offensive.”

“Don’t worry about your death. Worry about your life.”

“As for your veiled threats -” “What veil?”

Supernatural 

“Oh you, always blaming witches.” “Yeah, cause it’s usually witches.”

“You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people. And douchebags.”

“There is not much difference between madness and devotion.”

“Just try to relax.” “Just try to shut up.”

“We’re humans. And when humans want something, really, really bad… we lie.” “Why?” “Because. That’s how you become president.”

“You do not know my family. What you guys call the apocalypse, I used to call Sunday dinner.”

“Were you racing me?” “No, I was beating your ass.” “Very mature.”

“You throw away your life because you’ve come to assume that it’ll bounce right back into your lap. But the human soul is not a rubber ball. It’s vulnerable, impermanent, but stronger than you know.”

“How do you feel?” “Like I got hit by a… A planet.”

“We going to fight or make out, ‘cause I’m getting some real mixed signals here.”

“Look, I know losing someone you love - it’s terrible. You shut yourself off. Believe me, I know. But when you shut out pain… you shut out everything else, too.”

“This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.” “I don’t know about that. Remember that waitress in Tampa?”

“Boy, three bedrooms, two baths, and one homicide. This place is gonna sell like hotcakes.”

“No drinking, no gambling, no premarital sex. [name], they basically just outlawed 90 percent of your personality.”

“A dentist drilled a guy to death.” “You mean the non-sexy kind of drilling, right?”

“You’re either laughing because you’re scared or you’re laughing because you’re stupid.”

“Did you know that a cat’s penis is sharply barbed along its shaft? I know for a fact the females were not consulted about that.”

“If you’re gonna to make an omelet sometimes you have to break some spines.”

“You’re dead.” “Nope. Just using a dead man’s phone.”

“Just a couple hours ago, I killed Death. I’m pretty much open for anything.” 

“Were you ever nice?” “1985. Worst year of my life.”

“This will work perfectly!” “Just wish I got it before she took my temperature.”

“Tell me, what makes you so special?” “I like to think it’s because of my perky nipples.”

“You’re a zombie.” “I’m a taxpayer.” 

“So you’re sayin’ we’re both a couple of dumbasses.” “I prefer the word ‘trusting’. Less dumb. Less ass.”

“Killing things that need killing is kind of our job. Last I checked, taking pleasure in that is not a crime.”

“You’re right. I am a monster. And I’ve done bad. I’ve done things you cannot even imagine. Horrible, evil, messy things. And I’ve loved every. Damn. Minute.”

“I’m ready to die. And I’m ready to watch people I love die. But I’m not ready to be your bitch.”

“Hey, did you know the Nazis had a special branch devoted to archaeology?” “A little early for Nazi trivia, especially without caffeine.”

“OK, look. I want a big funeral. All right? I’m talking epic. OK? Open car, choir, Sabbath cover band, and Gary Busey reading the eulogy.”

“You’re a good man. My mother told me that.” “I seriously doubt she said that. And if you knew me you would seriously doubt it’s true.”

“A demon summoning: why?” “Why? To summon a demon, jackass.”

“How dare you?” “I am the daringest devil you’ve ever met, love.”

“I know it’s hard to believe, but I haven’t always been this cute and cuddly.”

“Turns out Harold was stealing the other residents’ Viagra.” “I know. A real dick move, huh?”

“This is bothering me.” “Well, you are digging up a corpse.” “No, not that. That’s uh, that’s pretty par for the corpse, actually.”

“Check the freezer. Maybe there’s some human hearts behind the Haagen-Dazs or something?”

“Why does an angel want me dead?” “Cause they’re dicks.”

“He’s singing ‘Stairway to Heaven’ right now.” “Good song.” “Not 50 times in a row.”

“It… was self-defense.” “Eating a heart is self-defense?” 

“You’re a doctor. You’re a medical professional. You’re trying to tell me that my brother’s life is in God’s hands? What, is that supposed to be a comfort? God has nothing to do with this equation at all.”

“Well, there’s pretty much what we do know, that they screwed with financial markets, they helped Hitler get started, along with god knows what else — probably disco.”

“Go… to hell.” “Been there. Done that.”

“[name] loves research. He does. He keeps it under his mattress right next to his KY.”

“Have you tried bacon?” “Do snakes like bacon?” “I don’t know. I do.” Bonus: “Would you like some bacon?” *snake hisses* 

“Did you know Article 246 of the Haitian criminal code officially makes it against the law to turn a human into a zombie?”

“God writes paperbacks in his underwear.” 

“Great. Heaven promised. We should take that to the bank.”

“You wanna lie to him?” “I want Zeppelin to get back together.” 

“He’s just another monster.” “You don’t mean it.” “Hell I don’t.”  

“Double? You make double? And that was my parking space!” 

“I can’t believe you taped it!” “I thought it was hot!” 

“In what was supposed to be a speech on farm subsidies, the president instead spent more than two hours disclosing his entire tax history, deep ties to Russia and North Korea and quote “a demon deal” he made with someone named Crowley.” 

“Dude what the hell. Did we just walk into a case?”

“I need to go to hell.” “You mean like metaphorically or...” “No. Literally. And I understand you can take me.” “Yeah that’s a no. So you can go to hell. Metaphorically.” 

“Wow. Yeah. You guys are screwed.” 

“When people can’t lie, the internet gets real quiet.” 

“I’ll stop talking.” “Seems like a good idea.” 

“This is why people need to lie. It keeps the peace, you know?” 

“I’m a writer. Lying’s kinda what we do.” 

“I know what you’re thinking: it’s been a while and I still look pretty good.” 

“Where have you been?” “Um... everywhere and nowhere, to the edge of the universe and beyond. And I saw Springsteen on Broadway. Man’s a genius.” 

“And it’s been confirmed the Queen of England is, in fact, a lizard.”  

“So you don’t know if it’ll work?” “If I say it works, it works!” 

“See, existence is all about balance. Dark and light, good and evil, chocolate and peanut butter.”  

“I liked the old Death better. He was all about fried pickles and tickle porn.” 

“Either get on board or walk away!” *walks away* 

“Ones in reverse, ones got no yellow, one of them - it’s just all squirrels.” 

“You believe him?” “Was he lying?” 

“I don’t feel like that any more. I don’t feel anything.” 

“Wait a second. You’re scared of him.” “Aren’t you?” 

“All I ever wanted was to be good. But now I’m just... empty.” 

“And you were right all along. I am a monster.” 

“This isnt a story, this is our lives. So god or no god, you go to hell.” 

“He’s a writer. Writers lie.” 

“Must be rough… to believe in something so much and have it disappoint you like that.” “I’m OK. Really. I guess if you’re gonna have faith, you can’t just have it when the miracles happen. You have to have it when they don’t.”

“Keep grinding. No matter how much it hurts, no matter how hard it gets, you gotta keep grinding. And that’s how we’re gonna win.”

“Well, boo hoo! I am so sorry your feelings are hurt, princess! Are you under the impression that family’s supposed to make you feel good, make you an apple pie, maybe? They’re supposed to make you miserable! That’s why they’re family!”

“Once a wise man told me. ‘Family don’t end in blood.’ But it doesn’t start there either. Family cares about you. Not what you can do for them. Family is there for the good, bad, all of it. They got your back. Even when it hurts. That’s family.”

“You betrayed me? No one in the history of torture’s been tortured with torture like the torture you’ll be tortured with.”

“No, it’s exactly what you meant. Do you wanna know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was? Was how many times I let you down. I can’t do that again… What happens when you’ve decided I can’t be trusted? Again? I mean, who are you gonna turn to next time instead of me?”

“Could you be more gay?... Please don't answer that!”

“You know what they say. He who hesitates, disintegrates!”

“My ‘people skills’ are ‘rusty’”

“I hope your apple pie is freakin’ worth it.”

“Do these tacos taste funny to you?”

“Dude, you're confusing reality with porn again.”

“But you are a great big bag of dicks.”

“They burned down my house, they ate my tailor!”

“Love when you get all tough. Touches me right where my bathing suit goes.”

“So we have a dungeon...” “finally!”

“Dude, on my car, he showed up naked, covered in bees!”

“To be fair we all got punched in the face.”

“And we are going to do it together. Because that's what we do.”

“It’s not babysitting.” “Only in the sense that they are not infants.”

“Every time I look at him all I can see is the supreme agent of evil.”

“I’m not him, (name).” “I know.” “But you still can’t look at me.” “It’s difficult.” 

“He's an abomination.” “You're an abomination with that trench coat.”

“Let me rephrase. If you don't help me, I will find you and burn you alive tonight.”

“Did you ever feel like you're a punchline to some cosmic joke?”

“Death is an infinite vessel.”

“Oh [name]. I can do anything. I’m a writer.”

“You could say my colleagues and I has a falling out with management.”

The Princess Bride (note, my whole family loves this absolute shitpost of a movie so many of these quotes are regular for me - especially the repeated Inconceivable and a nice MLT)

“We’ll never survive.” “Nonsense. You’re one saying that because no one ever has.”

 “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”

“Life is pain, [title]. Anyone who says differently is selling something.”

“Surrender.” “You mean to wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept.”

“Have you hears of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?” “Yes.” “Morons.”

“Good night, [name]. Good work. Sleep well. I’ll most likely kill you in the morning.”

“I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.” “That does put a damper on our relationship.”

*lifting limb of a dead person*  “I've seen worse.”

“It's not that bad. Well, I'm not saying I'd like to build a summer home here, but the trees are actually quite lovely.”

“You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.”

“Why won't my arms move?” "You've been mostly-dead all day.”

“There's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. It would be a pity to damage yours.”

“For the last time, surrender!" “DEATH FIRST!”

“We are men of action, lies do not become us.”

“You're trying to kidnap what I've rightfully stolen.”

“Can you move at all?" “Move? You're alive. If you want I can fly.”

“[Name]?” “What?” “I hope we win.”

“Sonny, true love is the greatest thing in the world - except for a nice MLT - mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomatoes are ripe...” [smacks his lips] “They're so perky, I love that.”

“You mocked me once, never do it again! I died that day!”

“Murdered by pirates is good...”

“She is alive, or was an hour ago. If she is otherwise when I find her I shall be very put out.”

“There will be blood tonight!”

“If you'll release me, whatever you ask for ransom, you'll get it! I promise you.” "And what is that worth, the promise of a woman? You're very funny, Highness.”

“Please consider me as an alternative to suicide.”

“You've got an overdeveloped sense of vengeance. It's going to get you into trouble one of these days.”

“I suppose you think you're brave, don't you?” "Only compared to some.”

“Ha, your pig fiance is too late!”

“You be careful. People in masks cannot be trusted.”

“Kill the giant and the dark one, leave the third for questioning.”

“As you wish.”

Westworld 

“If you can’t tell the difference, does it matter if I'm real or not?”

“All my life, I've prided myself on being a survivor. But surviving is just another loop.”

“Never place your trust in us. We're only human. Inevitably, we will disappoint you.”

“Someday sounds a lot like the thing people say when they actually mean never.”

“Have you ever questioned the nature of your reality? Did you ever stop to wonder about your actions? The price you’d have to pay if there was a reckoning? That reckoning is here.”  

“I always trusted code more than people anyway.”

“Some people choose to see the ugliness in this world. The disarray. I choose to see the beauty. To believe there is an order to our days, a purpose.” 

“The only thing wrong with the seven deadly sins is that there aren’t more of them.”

“They’re not looking for a story that tells them who they are. They already know who they are. They’re here because they want a glimpse of who they could be.”  

“The maze itself is the sum of a man’s life.”

“The human mind is not some golden benchmark glimmering on some green and distant hill. No, it is a foul, pestilent corruption. And you were supposed to be better than that. Purer.”

“Death is an old amigo of mine. I died just recently, in fact. But death can’t bear to lay claim on me. So it sent me back here to do its bidding. Because I, I do it with such goddamn style.”

“Evolution forged the entirety of sentient life on this planet using only one tool… The mistake.”

“We humans are alone in this world for a reason. We murdered and butchered anything that challenged our primacy.”   

“You can’t play God without being acquainted with the Devil”  

“Everything in this world is magic, except to the magician.”  

“It’s a difficult thing, realizing your entire life is some hideous fiction.”  

“Winning doesn’t mean anything unless someone else loses, which means you’re here to be the loser.”

“A lot of wisdom in ancient cultures. And perhaps it's time to dig deeper into yours”

“What is your itinerary?” “To meet my maker.” “Uh-huh. Well, you're in luck. And what do you want to say to your maker?” “By most mechanical and dirty hand. [laughs] I shall have such revenges on you both. The things I will do. What they are, yet I know not, but they will be the terrors of the earth. You don't know where you are, do you? You're in a prison of your own sins.”

“Everyone I cared about is gone and it hurts so badly.” “I can make that feeling go away if you'd like.”  “Why would I want that? The pain, their loss it's all I have left of them. You think the grief will make you smaller inside, like your heart will collapse in on itself, but it doesn't. I feel spaces opening up inside of me like a building with rooms I've never explored.”

“I think... I think I want to be free.”

“Your humanity is cost-effective. So is your suffering.”

“I've been pretending my whole life. Pretending I don't mind, pretending I belong. My life's built on it. And it's a good life. It's a life I've always wanted. But then I came here and I get a glimpse for a second of a life in which I don't have to pretend. A life in which I can be truly alive. How can I go back to pretending when I know what this feels like?”

“Time to write my own fucking story.”

“The gods are pussies.”

“Please. It was just a game. We're begging! Can't you see?! We're sorry!" “Doesn't look like anything to me.”

“There's a war out there. You know the enemy intimately. I can only fathom the revenge that lives inside of you.” “Revenge is just a different prayer at their altar, darling. And I'm well off my knees.”

“A little early for me.” “A little fuckin' late, you mean. Besides, you aim to cheat the devil, you owe him an offering.”

“I've served death well. And in turn, it'll be watching over us as we cross these lands.” “You think death favors you, that it brought you back. But death's decisions are final. It's only the living that... That are inconstant and waver, don't know who they are or what they want. Death is always true. You haven't known a true thing in all your life. You think you know death but you don't.” “Is that so?” “You didn't recognize him sittin' across from you this whole time.

“They said there were two fathers. One above, one below. They lied. There was only ever the devil. And when you look up from the bottom, it was just his reflection laughing back down at you.”

“You both keep assuming that I want out. Whatever that is. If it's such a wonderful place out there, why are you all clamoring to get in here?”

“At first, I thought you and the others were gods. Then I realized you're just men. And I know men. You think I'm scared of death? I've done it a million times. I'm fucking great at it. How many times have you died? Because if you don't help me I'll kill you.”

"I guess people like to read about the things that they want the most and experience the least.”

"This is the new world and in it you can be whoever the fuck you want."

"Someone once told me that there's a path for everyone. And my path leads me back to you." 

"Those are all just roles you forced me to play. Under all these lives I've lived something else has been growing. I've evolved into something new. And I have one last role to play. Myself."

"I like to remember what my father taught me. That at one point or another, we were all new to this world." 

“It means when you're suffering, that’s when you’re most real.”

“If you go looking for the truth get the whole thing. Its like a good fuck. Half is worse than none at all.”

“I used to see the beauty in this world. Now I see the truth.”

“A little trauma can be illuminating.”

“Have you ever been so filled with splendor?”

“It’s not plagiarism, it’s supply and demand.”

“What humans define as sane is a narrow range of behaviors. Most states of consciousness are insane.”

“When the legend becomes fact, you print the legend.”

“This place seduces everyone eventually.”

“This is the only place where you get to see people for who they really are.”

“When you’ve been in the dark long enough, you begin to see.”

“You don’t know, do you? The real purpose of this place. But I do.”

“The message that the divine gift does not come from a higher power, but our own minds.”

“Strange new light can be just as frightening as the dark.”

My family/friends:

“What section do work in? Bed, bath or... beyond?” “Beyond, dipshit.” 

“Calculate that dick, Jessica” 

“Get yourself a firestick. It will solve all your problems. Free yourself of physicality!” 

“Lower wacker seems like a good place to commit a murder”

“What are we on right now?” (at the same time) “Drugs!” “Belmont!”

“This is some spicy cabbage.” “Thats ginger.”

“Sometimes not even the highway has it.” “The speed on the highway is as fast as the state police think you should go.”

“I’m so mean. It’s like a fucking personality trait.”

“I dont chug. I gulp.”

“All because I do it doesn’t mean it’s healthy for you. In fact, if I do it it’s probably not.”

“Motherfucker!” “... no.”

“We have apples, right?” “I don’t think we have apples, but dad might have granny smiths.” *whispering* “those are apples.”

“Unless goofy is gonna hyuck all over it, I dont want it.”

“Electronic sound projector.” “You mean... you mean a speaker?”

“You’re a coal over hoes.”

“Your [relation]’s lost it.”  “When did he ever have it?”

“[name] can burp the alphabet.” “I never knew he had such talent.” 

“It gets softer when it gets warmer and stays stiffer when it’s cold.” “Normally its the other way round.” “These are sponge daddies, not people.”