#and then ok MAYBE i made a playlist specific for my angst au

[mrghostrat]

why do you need so many playlists 😭

are u in my house why do u know i have many playlists ???

[this-is-krikkit]

For the ask:

3²+2

24/3+6

18⁰+17

This is cause you called me a math nerd grrrrrr

(Or maybe because I'm just tired and icecubed and made myself a too strong drinkkkk)

😘

ahskfdmfgkdmsj thank you for the ask but also pls go see if it's raining?? i hate you ughhh!! (i'm sorry about the 🧊 hope you're better today love you 🫂)

send me more writer asks

11. do you have specific playlists for writing fics?

do i strike you as the kind of organized person who would do that, nube? really?? HONESTLY???? well, get shooketh, bc i do! i mean.. i have some vibes playlists for like angst, fluff and smut, but i only use em if i need to fix a part of a fic that doesn't feel right. usually, i link a fic to a song or two (whether i wanted to bc of lyrics or it just accidentally happens) and then i listen to that song endlessly until i'm done writing the fic and i can't stand it anymore x)

14. if you could see one of your fics adapted into a visual medium, such as comic or film, which fanfic would you pick?

oooh that's a great one. hmmm.. i guess i'd pick right as rain since it's so different from canon and one i clearly envision in my mind bc it's so long, or maybe no shortage of nutcases because it's hilarious imo and i would looove to see a snk x bsd x bd x yoi AU art/anime, like how fucked up would that look?? hehe

18. what’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

i'm gonna pick 4 (i got carried away, let me bask in the sudden self-appreciation ok!!!) and they're all smut-ish. who's surprised? not me. and not you, either, you know my mind lives in that gutter ugh

🔞 under the cut

i'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies (bsd, soukoku)

He has half a mind to break the kiss, if only to remind Dazai he’s never going to be able to last long enough to make them both finish this way, not when he eats about three meals a week and doesn’t look like he’s properly exercised in years. But the wet heat of Dazai’s mouth mixing with the breathy whines he feeds him without restraint, the perfect fit of Chuuya’s hands over his shoulders and of his locked ankles over the small of his back are too good, too perfect to be worth such a low blow.

get off with you, chapter 4 (yoi, victuuri)

Yuuri’s free hand comes up to cradle Victor’s face, gentle caresses against blushing skin even as his tongue slides between Victor’s fingers and his pelvis rolls in excruciatingly lovely circles under Victor’s, that perfect mix of raw desire and infinite tenderness that makes up Katsuki Yuuri’s unique, irresistible brand of beauty.

we built this town on shaky grounds (snk, levihan)

Levi doesn't think he's ever going to get enough of this; of them like this. Of the strong, overpowering stream of desire he can feel leaking so easily from every pore on their skin and entering his body, heart and soul through their hungry exploring hands, through the hips that eagerly respond to his own deliberate thrusts, through the tightening grip the most intimate parts of them have on him that's making it so fucking difficult not to plunge into the abyss of his own pleasure before he's managed to bring them there with him too.

scars (snk, levihan)

His fingertips relentlessly follow the trail of these dozens of secrets mapped out on their skin, some he's intimate with as he witnessed the event that tattooed them into their flesh, some he longs to uncover. All the while, Hange arches every muscle they can to increase the contact with his hand, and they either snicker knowingly whenever he traces a defect they know he's familiar with, or hum like they can feel his impatience and are silently promising they'll fill him in later about the ones that are still a mystery to him.

[honestlywtfisgoingon]

When You Weren’t Looking — pt. 1/?

PROFESSOR!OBI-WAN x READER

an au where you and you literature professor realize you both have things to learn about love, and yourselves, outside of class. (as we all know, this can only be done through a big scoop of angst and a smutty cherry on top) playlist

summary: you pretty much end up stealing anakin’s job

warnings: language maybe? mention of what i read in my horrific junior year

a/n: ok ok so some of you might be thinking that obi-wants being a little bitchy but padawan obi in tpm was kind of a stickler and i kind of wanted him to grow into rots obi (bc of y/n) he does have the rots hair tho (rip jedi mullet i still love you)

word count: 1,246 so pretty short for the beginning

Your eyes were following him as he walked back and forth across the front of the small lecture hall. He was talking about troubadour poetry, or was at least supposed to be, but he ended up talking enthusiastically about his philosophies and fascination with medieval literature and their cultural ideals, etc.. His eyes were lit up and his arms making animated gestures in an almost boyish excitement. That’s why most people took this class (besides the small fact that he was one of the more attractive professors). He always clearly and concisely explained the subject in the beginning, probably because he knew he had to get it all in before he fell into his usual habit of sharing his love of literature. Even if you didn’t care about the same things, it was mesmerizing the way he put all of it, and his passion made it so it was never boring. He somehow made it all sound like a story and you were the children gathered around his campfire.

Many other students also secretly enjoyed what happened to be one of your favorite parts of the class: taking note of the way his sleeves always got rolled up when he decided to write on the board or the way he would rub the back of his neck when he was thinking, unintentionally baring his biceps. Sometimes you felt as though you should feel guilty, but you weren’t being demeaning or anything, in fact, you were admiring him.

If he didn’t want you to gaze he shouldn’t have been so handsome.

But no, this time you were staring because he was the one who gave you a 62% on your last essay. You still had a good enough grade to pass, but if you wanted to transfer to your dream school, you would have to look pretty damn good on paper. It was an art school, but a very prestigious one that wanted to see if you were going to work hard, even in your non-art-related classes. You had messed up a bit with your grades freshman year of college (missing out on many classes simply because you could), but that could be compensated for if you could show growth in the following years. That was going to take a lot of A’s if you were going to make up for your slacking off. You had worked hard on your essay, putting in the same effort that you had put into the ones that got handed back to you with 90% written on the top, and it’s not like he was the easiest grader you’ve had.

The lecture had ended, and the room echoed with heavy footsteps of students heading out, along with the comments that had been held in for the last hour. You instead stayed seated, running the dialogue you had prepared for starting a conversation with Professor Kenobi in your head one more time.

You rose from your seat, whispering “fuck it,” and headed down the stairs towards the lowest floor of the classroom.

“Professor?” you said in your most polite yet assertive voice.

“y/n is it? Is there anything I can do for you?” he responded, lifting his eyes to see you as he leaned over his desk to shuffle some papers.

“It is actually. But I was wondering if we could discuss my last essay,” You cleared your throat, trying not to show that his blue eyes of all things were making you nervous, “specifically my grade on it actually,” you added.

“Ah I see,” He folded his hands as he put down the now neat stack of papers and sat back down in his chair.

“You gave me a 62% and I’ve always gotten good grades in this class but I didn’t do anything different. I wouldn’t turn in anything that I didn’t feel was at least well written,”

“It was well written, but that’s not the point”

“I’m sorry professor, but how is that not the point?” you said, brows furrowing

“The way you write is beautiful but it’s what you’re writing about. You completely missed the prompt” He didn’t say it harshly, but rather as though it was a casual fact that he figured you already knew.

“How do the relationships in troubadour poems reflect personal and real-world relationships?” You repeated the prompt for clarity.

“Yes. You gave me a description of a dynamic based on false idealism, but there was nothing personal, nothing real to you. I could have read an article on the facts of those dynamics if I really wanted to, but this isn’t psychology class,”

“So it should have been personal?”

It may not be psychology class but it is an essay, not a diary.

He could see the confusion on your face was still present so he elaborated, “It should have meaning. I want this class to push you into reflection. We can’t just read other people's experiences without applying them to our own. What would be the point? I asked for something personal. You don’t have to address anything wildly uncomfortable, but I graded them based on if you could tell someone actually tried to discover something by the end of the essay,” you could admire his intentions, but it was just an essay to you.

“So I got this grade because I didn't do some soul searching,” you deadpanned, no longer confused, but more irked.

His brows raised at your forwardness. He didn’t seem offended, but rather surprised.

“If you truly are unhappy with your grade, I’ll allow you to redo the essay,”

Well, you could redo it and fluff it all up now that you knew what he wanted. At the end of the day, you would do whatever just to take anything higher.

“Thank you I—“

“But I can only raise it 10% because it is after the fact,”

“Professor really?” you said exasperated. You actually stood up straight after that comment, hoping you didn’t sound disrespectful or rude. Thankfully, his reaction, or lack thereof, was exactly what you were hoping for.

“Well, let’s see… there’s a lot of filing and other tasks that I need done, they’re all menial i’m afraid, but I’d be willing to give you extra credit for it,”

Your face turned into a more pleasant expression, and then a confused one once more.

“Don’t you have a TA for that?”

“Anakin? Oh yes, well he’s…he likes to do everything at his own leisure” he sighed but didn’t seem too down about it, more like he was used to it.

“So, may I ask, why’s he your TA?”

“It was a favor to a friend, Professor Qui Gonn Jinn. Please don’t mention it but Anakin's actually his godson. Although I’m British, I’m not a huge supporter of nepotism,- don’t worry,” he smiled. “It’s really because he believes he has a lot of potential, and I agree— but practically he’s not very helpful” you laughed a little at his comment and he had a slightly amused face as well.

There was a slight pause before you said, “I’d like to take you up on your offer,” nodding firmly.

“I’ll see you in my office after every class starting tomorrow? Does that work with your classes?”

“Yes,” you said after taking a moment to think about your schedule.

“Wonderful. I look forward to it,” he smiled, getting up and slinging his work bag over his shoulder.

Spending that much time with a professor? If I go bored out of my mind…

PART 2

[hawaiianshirt-doodle-dump]

I didn’t finish my Econ homework but anyways let’s get right into this 😎 Playlist rant time (I wasn’t gonna put it under a cut originally and then it just got LONG)

ok first are the ones that are on there for vibe alone, I can’t tell you why they just are (sometimes just cause I listen to them while drawing)

Touch Tone Telephone - Richie

Lifetime Achievement Award - Eddie

Baby Hotline - Richie (realizing we have a phone theme here)

Community Gardens -neither I just like the “you’ll be fine oh honey pie, who could ever hurt you who could be so unkind”

The Whole World and You - Richie, still haven’t decided if I’m keeping this one though

the hyper specific AU ones (most of these work for normal fem reddie too I just wanna talk about the AU’s)

Nights Like These - UGH THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITES @/dollarstoreartsupplies made a Reverse fem reddie AU that literally lives in my brain fucking rent free and this is my favorite song for them like ughhhhhh love them ?:):?:? anyways general vibe is them running away together which I think can also be transferred to regular reddie I just,,, for reference it’s about rev reddie and u can find more info about their characters on Emma’s blog, I adore them

Dirty Imbecile - WEREWOLF RICHIE!!! THE LYRICS FIT SO WELL!!!! “they’re just wholly unaware of all the blood and sweat I cry before dawn” LIKE HELLO ?? ITS KINDA LITERAL BUT STILL!! anyways same principle, it can also apply to regular Richie

Devil Town -Neibolt Kids What More Do You Need (reminder 2 read Family Road Trip you have to Understand shhdndj)

Wrecking Ball -this is ABSOLUTELY an Eddie song and it works for a few AUs, Neibolt Kids in particular, Rev Eddie ABSOLUTELY, but also a Generally Teen Angst Ridden Eddie

Angel Eyes and Basketball - Richie “there are flowers growing all around a massive animal inside of me / and it’s so ugly / and I’m so broken / and I’m so ugly / and it’s so broken” but is it metaphorical or literal 🤨🤨 you decide,,, anyways this one is just a good losers club song like u gotta look at the lyrics it works so well for these kids

songs that are still hyper-specific but ARENT necessarily related to AU’s

Downhill - “and you’re the one who taught me to be brave/ I’ve never spent a moment loving anyone but you” waowoaowoeeowoaoeoewo please holy fuck it makes me so emotional as an Eddie POV song (this one is sorta connected to an AU just cause,, it’s got a way above my skill level mental storyboard connected to it for the Neibolt kids shhsbdjdj)

Funny You Should Ask - EDDIE. SONG. UGH another one w an extensive storyboard connected to it, just like,,, from the cast line at the beginning to the like “I guess I’m just another thing you left behind” like,,, idk if Richie left before Eddie and she was like,,, kind of secretly resentful of that,, ouchie

Bruno is Orange- I,, “did you hear about that mother broke her daughters legs in two and said it’s too dangerous to walk so I had to save you” AAAAAA

ok last one for now but Bathtub- an Eddie song Very Simple

I thought this would be easier it’s not I want to explain All Of Them so I’ll cut myself off here annnndd maybe there will be a follow up anyways if you got this far thanks :] I like talking about this stuff it’s very fun for me

[luvknow]

untitled playlist | seo changbin

genre: radio dj!changbin x reader | fluff ; light angst ; friends-to-lovers ; college au ; music/playlist-centric summary: changbin is painfully aware of your deep infatuation with his dj identity, spearb, and finds it harder to hide it from you as the days pass and his feelings for you grow. when you meet another guy, he’s stuck watching you go through the stages of falling for someone else. you open up your heart to changbin more and more at each stage, and you inspire him to make you a playlist. wc: 6.2k

warning - mentions of alcohol

CHANGBIN’S PLAYLIST (meant to be listened to in order)

"What is up, my friends? My dudes? Mis amigos? It's your favorite spicy boys  J.ONE and CB97 double-teaming the mic tonight without SPEARB ‘cuz he's off studying somewhere since he’s a dumbass -"

"Aw, he's not on the show tonight?" you pouted. "I was looking forward to this all day.”

Changbin had to suppress a loud sigh as the news finally broke that he - well,  SPEARB - wouldn’t be on the show tonight. And of course knowing you, aka SPEARB’s number one fan, he would be hearing about how upset you were probably all night during your study session. Why you even insisted on listening to the radio in the first place as you both studied, he had no idea. But how could he argue when you were so adorable whenever you got excited to listen to the show? Your eyes always sparkled and it was enough to make a weak man like Changbin do whatever you asked.

“He has a big exam this week, or something,” Changbin shrugged, trying to be as nonchalant and unsuspicious as possible. “I don’t know, I forgot what he said.”

“And you guys just let him take the day off like that!?”

“I mean, academics are more important to him than the show.”

“I bet he’s so smart,” you sighed dreamily. “God, I love him...”

“Really?” he scoffed. “I had no idea.”

“Don’t get sassy with me. You’re just jealous ‘cuz no one loves you as much as I do him.”

“Yeah, that’s it.”

Changbin hid his blushing face by tilting his baseball cap and looking down at his very interesting notes. He never, ever thought he’d hear you say love and associate it with him, even if you meant for it to be for SPEARB, in all his time knowing you. Now you say it so often it’s like he never goes a day without hearing it.

“How come you don’t like the other two as much?” he dared to ask.

He watched you shrug nonchalantly as if your unwavering enormous love for a DJ you’ve never met was comparable to whatever feelings you had for the other two. “I don’t know, I mean Chan’s super cool and funny and J.ONE seems like a cool dude, too. But I feel like I connect with SPEARB on another level. Have you noticed that he and I have the exact same taste in music? Like have you ever met anyone like that before and felt like it was fate, or am I crazy to have fallen for some faceless boy?”

“You know you and I have the exact same taste in music, right?” he deadpanned.

“Yeah, and that’s why fate brought us together and we’re a super cool unstoppable dynamic duo,” you said, stating the obvious.

“Well, when you put it that way, I guess I do think it’s kind of crazy that music brought us together like this.”

“We should make each other a playlist, or something. You know, to commemorate this friendship.”

“Wouldn’t it end up being the exact same playlist, though?”

“Shit, you’re right.” As it was clear that not much studying was going to be done at the moment, you slumped over your notes with another pout on your lips that Changbin struggled to ignore. “I just want someone to make a playlist for me.”

“Why?”

“It’s like the most intimate form of affection in my eyes. Other people want to be kissed, or hugged, or hold hands, but I just want a playlist made for me.”

After hearing your words, he thought that maybe fate really did bring you two together. Changbin was a romantic boy at heart, and after all the high school and college romantic-comedies he’s watched, he realized he wanted nothing more than to make a hundred and one playlists for someone he loved.

“Ok,” he said suddenly, tearing you away from your daydream.

“Ok, what?”

“I’ll make you a playlist.”

“Really? Why?”

“You just said you wanted one!”

“Yeah, but I didn’t think you’d actually make me one! Have you been watching your rom-coms again?”

“I take it back, I’m not making you one.”

“No, wait!” you begged. Before Changbin could leave your table and pout on your couch, you grabbed both of his hands from across and squeezed them tightly. His hands were warm and soft, squeezing yours back so lightly that you failed to notice. Your touch was enough to make that boy freeze in his seat. “Please make me one?”

After fake contemplating for several seconds, he caved in and said, “Fine, I’ll make you a damn playlist. But it might take a while - I’ve never made one before, so I want to put a lot of thought into this. Plus, I want to put some songs you’ve never heard before.”

“Wow, you must really like me ~”

“I like you sometimes.”

“Just sometimes?”

“Yeah, like three days out of the week. Four tops.”

“That’s more than half, so I’ll take it. Hey, when you’re done with it, can you give it to SPEARB to have it play on the radio?”

“What, why!?”

“So it’ll be like he made the playlist fo me instead.”

“You’re so weird... Fine, I’ll make him play it on the damn radio. Now can we please get back to studying? We have a big exam coming up, too, just like your husband SPEARB.”

“Wait, 3RACHAts is about to start...!”

You both ended up listening to the entire show instead of studying.

There was a gap between your classes at around lunch time that matched up with Changbin’s break and that was one of the few times throughout the day where you saw and hung out with him during school hours. There was the cutest cafe in the middle of campus where you two would go during that time and just enjoy each other’s company for a couple of hours without having to worry about classes or exams. Being inside the cafe with your best friend was a great escape from the crippling reality of adulthood, and Changbin couldn’t agree more.

Between the two of you, Changbin was always the one to arrive first, so he orders both of your drinks out of habit and waits patiently. He used this time to start researching on songs to put on your playlist and he can’t imagine the last time anything music related was this difficult for him.

What would be the perfect playlist that honored your relationship? Would it have songs that you both discovered together? Songs that reminded him of you? Or ones that explained how he felt about you?

But then that would come off as a type of confession, wouldn’t it?

Regardless of that, there were just so many songs that he came up with that didn’t match well together enough to be put into one single playlist. He didn’t want to just throw in every single song that came to mind because that was just too messy - there had to be some type of order to your playlist. Or playlists? Maybe making a mini playlist for separate occasions or themes would make everything more organized and who knows, maybe he’d gain some major cute boy points, or something.

Changbin’s not sure how long he’s been waiting, but he knows it’s been longer than usual when your hot drink is no longer steaming. Just as he thought about where you were, on cue, you came rushing through the door panting like you sprinted all the way there.

“Hey!” you breathed out heavily in your chair.

“You’re later than usual,” he stated before closing his laptop.

“Ah, yeah, I got caught up with someone.”

Someone was specific enough for Changbin to know that he didn’t know or care for whomever this someone was, seeing as you two shared most, if not all, of your friends. Your wide grin made him even more curious.

“With who?” he dared to ask while raising a curious brow.

“You know Kim Mingyu, right?”

Of course he knew Kim Mingyu. Kim Mingyu, the tall, dark, muscular, handsome, Mr. Perfect man who shared the studio across 3RACHA’s with his friends who made music for fun. Changbin often envied him for being everything he wasn’t in terms of appearance, although he thinks he won if it was about who had the stronger biceps.

“Yeah, I know him. Cool guy,” he said, clearing his throat. “What about him?”

“He came up and talked to me after our lecture just now. I didn’t even know he was in that class! Ah, I got so flustered, I’ve had the biggest crush on him for a while now.”

The thought of you having a crush on someone never really crossed Changbin’s mind. His initial feelings weren’t anger, or disheartened, or even jealous - it was more like he was surprised? He wasn’t sure how to explain it because topics like this never came up in your conversations, so he wasn’t sure how to react properly with this news.

But you looked so happy, and that’s all that mattered to him. The little sting in his chest was hard to ignore, but he’d deal with that later.

“He asked me to hang out next week ~” you swooned cutely.

“Like on a date?”

“I’m not so sure... he didn’t explicitly say date. But a dinner sounds like a date, doesn’t it?”

“It does, but if he didn’t say it was a date, then it’s not a date.”

“Is that how it works? I never understood these things...” You take a moment to think about what Mingyu’s proposal of dinner could really mean, and Changbin can’t help but notice how cute you looked, all excited to be talking to some boy you barely knew. “Anyways, enough about me. What’s up with you?”

“Nothing as exciting as talking to Mingyu, but I did start on your playlist.”

“Really!? Can I see it!? What do you have on there right now -”

“Chill, will you?” he chuckled. “I don’t have any songs yet. I only have an idea of how I want to arrange it.”

“Arrange it for what? It’s a playlist, you throw songs in a list and play it...”

“No, that’s not as fun or meaningful. I really want to make this playlist the best one you’ll ever receive, so trust me on this, ok? It’s going to be a long process.”

You didn’t know what you did to deserve a friend like Changbin, but whatever it was you were thankful, because he was the greatest friend you could ever ask for. He was as careful about this playlist for you as he was with all of his important music projects, and you were so flattered that this meant as much to him as it did to you.

“Ok, I trust you ~” you sang. “Can you at least give me some hints?”

“I don’t have any songs yet, but I know I want it to be very... you.”

“Very me?”

“Yeah. I want to make it for your ears only - so exclusively for you that you and I are the only people in the world who know what this playlist means.”

Like a flower in the month of May, with flushed cheeks and bright eyes, your lips bloomed into a heart-stopping grin.

“I can’t wait to listen to it,” you tell him.

“I hope you’ll like it.”

“I know I’ll love it.”

you [7:42 PM]: HEY are you in the studio!? tell spearb i love him!!!!!!!!

changbin [7:44 PM]: ok, weirdo. how’s your not-so-date date with mr. perfect going so far?

you [7:45 PM]: great amazing wonderful ~ he bought my food and everything! i must look like an ugly tomato from all the blushing.

changbin [7:45 PM]: i bet you look like a cute tomato lol. i’ll talk to you later, the show’s about to start.

you [7:47 PM]: if you love me, tell spearb to gimme a shoutout.

changbin [7:48 PM]: maybe.

you [7:48 PM]: maybe you love me or maybe you’ll tell him?

changbin [7:49 PM]: both.

“Wow, I’ve never seen so many heart emojis next to your name before,” Chan chuckled as he peaked over Changbin’s shoulder. “She must really like you.”

“Can’t imagine why,” Jisung teased from behind.

“Yeah, she has the biggest crush on SPEARB, it’s crazy. She’s literally my number one fan.”

“How, when she’s never ‘met’ SPEARB before?” Jisung asked.

“I don’t know, she said something about how we have the exact same taste in  music and I guess that’s a big turn on for her.”

“Aye, you should tell her that it’s you and maybe you’ll get some for once.”

“It’s not like that,” Changbin sighed. “It never was.”

“You’re telling me you never thought about it?” Chan asked as he set up the mics for the show.

“Thought about...?”

“C’mon, it’s the biggest trope in the book. You guys are best friends, or whatever, you get super close, you get used to their company and presence and everything, then they start dating someone else, you start wishing it was you who made them smile like that, etcetera etcetera ~ You’ve never thought about them that way?”

As of lately, when all the guys have been bombarding him with questions and how you kept talking about your date, sure he’s maybe thought about what it would be like to date you only a handful of times. Before, it was never really like that. You were both in this comfortable space with each other without a worry in the world, just enjoying each other’s company.

But now, as things are ever-changing, so are his thoughts about you. Would you leave him to go hangout with Mingyu more if your relationship developed? Would he lose you so easily to some other guy who didn’t know you the way he did?

No. He couldn’t let that happen. He wouldn’t.

Changbin groaned and threw his phone on the table. “Well, now I am!”

“Oops...”

“You know what’s the worst part? I told them I’d make them a playlist.”

“Not gonna lie, that’s pretty serious,” Jisung tisked.

“I know... I’m playing the first song tonight.”

“Damn, that’s really serious. I hope you know what you’re doing.”

“I don’t, but I’ll play the days by ear.”

“Well, we’re team Binnie all the way!”

“Thanks...”

“Yo, we’re on in thirty,” Chan scolded.

As the clock ticked down the seconds to go on-air, Changbin started having second thoughts about playing your first song and even making you a playlist in general. But the day he agreed to make it, you beamed brighter than the sun, so how could he say no to you? He always had a hard time doing so.

Throughout the week, as your day with Mingyu approached, Changbin witnessed some change in you. It was small, but big enough for him to notice. Your eyes sparkled more, your smile was sweeter, and you radiated this contagious and intoxicating energy. He guessed this was what you were like when you were in the beginning stages of liking someone.

Like a flower in May, you bloomed so beautifully for Mingyu, and Changbin found the perfect first song to your playlist. All of his doubts about creating the perfect playlist were clouded by pictures of how you looked whenever you looked at Mr. Perfect with adoration.

Changbin knows that you’ll never look at him that way. Your eyes would never sparkle the same way, your smile wouldn’t taste as sweet, and you wouldn’t radiate the same deep and loving aura. Despite it all, he wanted nothing more than to complete this playlist for you. He wanted nothing more than to watch you fall so deeply in love so he can capture it in a list of songs that were meant just for you.

And even if you didn’t fall for him, or Mingyu, or if it took forever and a day to find your special someone, then Changbin would take forever and a night to complete your playlist. You deserved to know how Changbin looked at you, and through a list of carefully-picked out songs was the best way to show you.

So here’s to song number one.

“Back at it again, it’s 3RACHA Radio ~!” Chan greeted playfully. “Welcome to another show with your favorite spicy boys. It’s me, CB, here with both J.ONE and SPEARB tonight, finally.”

“What’s up, it’s ya boy, J.ONE!”

“SPEARB here ~”

“Before we begin, I believe our good man SPEARB has someone he wants to make a shout-out to?”

“I do?” Jisung grabbed Changbin’s phone and pulled up your text message about how you asked him only minutes ago if he could give you a shout-out. “Oh, right! I’d like to give a shout-out to my number one fan, the stunning _____. I dedicated this first song just for you ~ And for being such a good friend, you should buy Changbin a pizza.”

“Wow, where’s my number one fan...” Jisung pouted.

“Who said you even had one?”

“Hey, he’s being mean to me again!”

“God, you guys are such children,” Chan sighed. “We’re going to take a quick break and prepare for the next segment of our show as Changbin plays the song he dedicated to his dearest _____. Stay tuned.”

After pressing play, Changbin’s phone vibrated when you sent him a text.

you [8:04 PM]: what kind of toppings do you like?

Today marked your fifth time hanging out with Mingyu as just friends. With all the flirting going on and subtle touches that made your skin crawl with goosebumps, you’d think that he would have asked you out on an official date by now, but he hadn’t, at least not yet. You were really hoping that number five was your lucky number.

And thankfully, it was. On your fifth day of hanging out as just friends, Kim Mingyu finally asked you out on a date.

When you saw Changbin afterwards, as you skipped your way to him, he could only assume from there what happened between you and Mingyu. Even past midnight, in the darkest hours with barely any street lights shining, you and your unwavering smile glowed brighter than the sun. In all his time knowing you, he’s never seen you so full of life, so he guess he could thank Mr. Perfect for that.

You looked so beautiful like this, and it was all because of Mingyu. And that’s ok, because at least Changbin was still here with you, watching you bloom. He figured you must be a rose, or some other flower with thorns, whose blossom was worth the painful points that pricked at his heart.

Days pass as your dates pass and your time with Changbin dwindled down to only a couple of times per week. Naturally, you put more effort into seeing Mingyu while still trying to balance your free time with your best friend, but twice a week for him wasn’t enough. Yes, he was being greedy, but he was only ever greedy with you for the right reasons. Changbin always wanted you all to himself and now he had to share.

But maybe seeing you less would be a good thing. Maybe the absence of you would help him forget about your shining smile or your sweet scent or your soft skin. But they say distance makes the heart grow fonder, and those two days he sees you throughout the week, he treasured every second. The short moments he had with you made his fire for you burn twice as hot, and now he was in big trouble.

He couldn’t even imagine what his life would be like if he was in Mingyu’s place. It was a distant dream to even think about what it’d be like to kiss you and to hold you, but he knew if he could, he’d never let you go. The more he saw you, the more his thoughts of you start to feel toxic and obsessive and he thinks that maybe some real, permanent time away from you would do him some good.

But as you stood in your living room dressed for a night out, he couldn’t bring himself to tell you.

“You’re not coming out tonight?” you asked him as you put in your earrings.

Changbin shook his head. “Nah, I have a lot of stuff to work on.”

“Wow, Seo Changbin turning down turning up? Never thought I’d see the day.”

A dry laugh escaped his lips. “Yeah, well, things have changed lately, I guess.”

You agreed completely. “I guess they have... It’s weird, isn’t it?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t make fun of me, ok?”

“No promises.”

“I don’t know, I’ve just been feeling sort of empty lately, which is weird because I’ve been really busy. I think the thing that’s changed the most is not seeing you so often and I think that might be the cause of it.” Changbin watched your cheeks flush an adoring shade of red. “What I’m trying to say is that I miss you.”

Changbin released a tired sigh and lazily held his arms out open. “Come here.”

You practically jumped into his arms as he struggled to not fall over. With your arms wrapped tightly around his neck and his resting loosely on your hips, he holds you for a short moment. Against his better judgement, he tells you, “I miss you, too. I won’t be going anywhere.”

Of course you knew he meant that in a figurative way, but even when he left your apartment to go do his work, you felt like the cavity in your heart wasn’t filled. There was something off about him lately, and you can’t put your finger to it, but you didn’t have time to dive into that tonight.

As one of the hosts of the party, Mingyu asked for you to meet him there. It was strange walking into a party alone, but thankfully you’ve been around him enough to recognize most of the people there. You first tried to find Mingyu, and for being the tallest guy amongst the crowd, he was surprisingly very hard to find. You often got distracted when looking as a bunch of his friends would pull you into their round of shots.

“Well, if it isn’t the one and only _____,” Minghao said, boyishly wrapping an arm around you. “Shot?”

Without hesitation, you said, “Please.”

You’re not sure how many you’ve had or which of his friends had you wrapped up in their arms, but you didn’t care because you were having the time of your life. You stopped asking for Mingyu when you realized he was probably busy doing host things.

On your way to the bathroom, you stumbled over empty cans and used the couples making out on the walls to help guide you through. Now was the bathroom the second door on the right or the third? You can’t remember, but when you tested your luck with the second door, you wished you’d gone for the third.

A shirtless Mingyu was towered over another shirtless body until they untangled their bodies at the sudden opening of the door. The boy you adored looked back at you, annoyed that you interrupted his rendezvous, but then his furrowed brows and scolding expression melted into one that could be mistaken for regret.

“_____...” he trailed off.

You felt like puking, so you left his room and locked yourself up in the third door on the right.

It was already 1:30 am when you called, and luckily Changbin was still up finishing his work. The background noise on your side of the line was still loud, even if you were locked up in the bathroom. If you were still at the party, what could you have possibly called him for?

“Hello?” he answered.

“I didn’t wake you, did I?” you asked softly.

Something was wrong. “Of course not. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I promise,” you lied. “But if you’re not busy, can you come get me...?”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

You silently apologized to the poor souls who were waiting for the bathroom, but luckily on the dot after ten minutes, Changbin texted you that he was outside waiting. Before Mingyu or any one of his friends could spot and capture you, you snaked your way through the house and made it out the door.

It was hard to see your figure in the dark so he was startled that you ran into his arms so quickly. There’s a bit of alcohol that tainted your scent and your embrace doesn’t feel the same as you muffled your quiet sniffles into his shoulder. By the looks of Mingyu watching the two of you through the doorway, Changbin figured you must have discovered something you didn’t want to see.

“Let’s go home,” he whispered before pulling away.

You held his hand the entire walk back, finding solace in his warm touch. He felt like you were gripping onto him for your life as your fingers never lost their grip. The walk back was silent, but he didn’t mind as long as you were with him.

When you finally made it back to your apartment, Changbin could clearly see how you wilted in the light. You must be so tired. You didn’t say anything as you went to your couch and buried your face in the pillows. The only thing he could do for now was follow you, sitting at the edge of the cushions and rubbing your back softly.

“What happened?” he finally asked.

“He was in a room doing stuff with someone else.”

Changbin prayed that you never have to see that scum ever again.

“Am I not enough?” you asked. “I thought everything was going great. I liked him a lot, I thought he liked me, and we even kissed... Am I just not enough?”

Changbin couldn’t stand to see you this way. You deserved to always smile, and feel loved, and feel like you were enough. Silently, he got up from his seat and played another song off of your unnamed playlist on your speakers.

You looked at him with curious and teary eyes. “What are you doing?”

“Let’s dance.”

“What...?”

“C’mon! Dance with me ~”

The handsome boy enticed you with silly arm flailing and you couldn’t say no to how cute he looked. Slowly, you got up from your couch and made your way to him. He took one hand in his and rested the other on your hip as he led you in an offbeat dance that made you laugh for the first time after the incident. Dancing in the middle of your living room, Changbin made you feel like how Mingyu once made you feel - like you were the only one he could ever look at, even if the room was crowded with people.

“Why are we dancing?” you managed to say through your giggles.

“An outfit like this shouldn’t go to waste by ending your night crying over some dumbass. Besides, don’t you feel better? More alive ~?”

“I always feel alive when I’m with you.”

“Mm, me too.”

The song soon faded to nothing and Changbin changed his hold on you to have both of his arms wrapped around your waist. As you rested yours on his shoulders, the two of you swayed to the next song that played. You’re not sure how or when, but you find his face getting closer and closer to yours.

“Don’t ever think you’re not enough, ok?” He brought his hands to your beautiful face, cupping your puffy cheeks as he he wiped brushed away the stray tears that fell. “You will always be more than enough.”

And then you kissed him.

The moment he often dreamed about was coming true and every detail he thought of was spot on. Your lips really were as soft as petals, and he felt like he could fly with you in his arms, but this was not how it was meant to happen. In your vulnerable state, feeling a bit broken and lonely, he figured you must have kissed him as a way of finding solace.

But that wasn’t the case at all. Even though you two bickered often, Changbin never failed to make you feel so loved, in the littlest ways possible. You never had a way of thanking him before, and sure this method was unorthodox, but you honestly couldn’t think of a better way to tell him how much you appreciated him.

Of course you loved him. He knew it, too, but it wasn’t the same kind of love he craved.

When he kissed you back with a heavy force, you were able to taste the kind of love he wanted from you.

The kiss didn’t last long enough. You were still coming down from your high when Changbin stepped away from you in a slight panic.

“I have to go,” he said.

“What, why?”

“I-I forgot to finish something at home.”

“Wait, don’t go -”

“I’ll see you later.”

“Don’t leave me.”

He paused at your door, contemplating your words and wondering if he should really stay. When you tell him not to leave like that, he knows he’d drop anything and everything to stay, but this wasn’t right. You were intoxicated, and lonely, and this wasn’t fair to him. He had to leave now or he’d never be able to.

You were left alone again.

Weeks passed and things have changed. Mingyu was now dating the other naked body you caught him with, and you were happy for him, truly. He’s apologized since then, and you even became good friends with both of them afterwards. You’ve never seen him so infatuated with you the way he was with them, and you were glad to see that at least someone you cared about was feeling loved.

Of course, your heart stung a little, as you wished someone could look at you the same way, whether it was Mingyu or someone else. You figured this must have been what Changbin felt you first started dating Mingyu.

You haven’t seen Changbin in weeks. No matter how many texts or calls you send about wanting to see him, he’d always tell you how busy he was or avoid the topic completely or just end the conversation there.

You missed him so much and there was no way for you to tell him. Maybe you’d figure that out later after tonight’s 3RACHA show.

Changbin finished your playlist. After months of searching for the perfect songs, he finally narrowed them down to ten. These ten were a mix from the day you developed feelings for another guy up until this moment, where he’s stuck in a stage where he can’t even face you. He’d use the show as his means of facing you until he can gain the courage to do so in person.

Changbin’s name lit up on your phone for the first time this week.

changbin [7:56 pm]: are you listening to 3racha tonight?

you [7:56 pm]: yeah, why?

changbin [7:57 pm]: i told spearb to play you something.

you [7:58 pm]: what is it?

He didn’t respond as he loaded up the playlist onto the queue. Just after, he pressed the on-air button.

“What’s up, our lovely listeners? Tonight is going to be a special solo SPEARB show, as J.ONE’s off studying and CB probably hunching over the toilet suffering from food poisoning. Let’s keep hyung in our thoughts tonight.” 

Changbin released a gentle sigh into the mic before continuing.

“I want to start tonight’s show off with telling you all a story of this friend I have. We’ve known each other for a while now, like since our first semester here. And you know, we talk a lot about relationship advice on the show because, well, relationships and college are a messy combo, don’t you think?”

“Amen,” you said to no one.

“Their situation wasn’t any different, but I got to witness it in person for the first time, and let me tell you it is very different. If you’ve seen this before, then you know exactly what your friend looks like when they see that special someone, right? Their eyes are all sparkly, they can’t stop smiling, their cheeks are glowing and it’s really the cutest thing. They were so happy with that someone that you couldn’t help but be happy, too, even if it wasn’t with you.

“And then the messy college part comes in. Sometimes it’s for the better, and sometimes it’s for the worst. It’s not fun witnessing it for the worst. Like say, one of them messed with someone else at a party, or the someone feels neglected - either way, not fun. And so I watched them wilt into a fallen flower who no longer had the light in their eyes.”

Your heartbeat quickened as the story progressed. It was like SPEARB was speaking to you.

“It’s crazy, to be honest, to witness those falling in love stages from the very beginning. From when they only had eyes for their special someone to feeling like they weren’t enough, it was painful for me to sit here and do nothing. I haven’t seen them in a long time because I’m a coward, but I told them to listen tonight because I have something special for them. _____? Are you listening?”

Your eyes widened. “Huh...?”

“It’s me, Changbin. I finished making your playlist. It’s ten songs about how I feel when I looked at you these past few months. I’ll be playing it tonight, so please listen, ok?”

Your night was consumed by listening to your favorite DJ/best friend talk about the meaning behind each song and him answering questions about your relationship with him. It still hadn’t hit you properly that Changbin was SPEARB because you were more interested in his song choices. All ten of them were so him, and yet so you at the same time.

You had to go to the studio.

You listened to the stream on the go as the last song played on your way to the studio. You didn’t realize you were running the whole way until you ran out of breath in front of the campus building.

“Thanks for listening to Soft Hours with SPEARB,” he chuckled into the mic. “I feel a lot better after getting that off my chest. _____, I hope you’re still listening... I love you and I miss you.”

Like one of Changbin’s cheesy romantic-comedy movies, you waited patiently for your best friend/lover outside of the building so you could run into his arms and press kisses all over his stupid face.

He was surprised to see you, but at the same time he wasn’t, because he knew you all too well. So he already had his arms wide open when you jumped into his arms with full force.

“Whoa, hello to you, too, my little koala,” he teased. “I take it you listened?”

“Mm, I listened to it on the way here.”

“Did you hear the end?”

“I did. I love you, too.”

Changbin tears you away and holds you at a safe arm’s length. “You know what I mean when I say that, don’t you?”

You break away from his grip on your shoulders to grab his stupid, handsome face. “Yes, I do, silly.”

“Are you sure...?”

When your lips press to his, all his worries seemed to melt away.

“If you’re not sure that I’m sure, that’s ok. We can take things slow, right?” you reassured.

“Yeah. Slow.”

“Mm, good. I do love you - as a friend, as a best friend, as... whatever this is. No matter what, you know I love you, too, right?”

“I do,” he lightly pinched a portion of your cheek. “Now stop being so mushy, it’s gross.”

“You’re the one who confessed on live radio!”

“Whatever ~”

“Wanna come over and listen to the playlist again? I owe you a pizza, don’t I?”

He pressed one last kiss on your lips for affirmation. “Of course. Pepperoni, please.”

EPILOGUE - what the songs mean

You and Changbin snuggled on the couch while he played you every song in order.

“When you told me about your first date with Mingyu, you looked so happy and beautiful, so I picked out Bloom as your first song. It’s very catchy, right? I like it a lot, even if it was chosen for you and Mingyu...”

“I like it, too. And that’s fine, just change it so it’s about you ~”

“It’s not the same ~ and, oh, Moments I also like a lot. It reminds me of whenever I get lost in the moment with you.”

“You’re so gross...”

“Mm, Wine is pretty self-explanatory... you were drunk at the party I picked you up at. You were so sad that night, you know? I couldn’t stand it, so then I picked Dance to This and Dream in a Dream to dance with you in your living room the same night I kissed you.”

“Those two are my personal favorites.”

“I’m glad. Fly With Me, Sun & Moon, With U, Eclipse, and Jasmine are all just songs with lyrics I wish I had to courage to tell you in person. Jasmine’s my personal favorite, which is why it’s last.”

“I love this so much. I never thought I’d see the day Seo SPEARB Changbin would be so cheesy and soft for someone ~” you teased.

He kissed your forehead. “Only for you.”

[brielarsonist]

Fanfic Survey Meme

Tagged by @meowdejavu

At what age did you start writing fanfiction? I started writing it in jr high, so maybe when I was like 12 or 13? My first fic was LotR and I made up an OC that fell in love with Legolas and it was honestly terrible.

Who is your favorite author? ok so I honestly love reading the works that my friends do, because it makes me so happy to see how talented they are. But also, I’m going to agree with what Alicia said in her post about being her own favorite author, because at the end of the day we’re writing these fics for ourselves. We all have very specific things that we want to see happen in fic and only we can make that happen for ourselves.

Favorite type of scene to write? ANGST. If I’m not uncomfortable with how terrible the characters are feeling, am I really fulfilling my potential? No, I’m not. My proudest moment was when a friend read an installment of one of my fics and told me that she cried. Total score.

What is your favorite fanfic? Ok so I wish I could remember the name of this fic, but years ago I read this Sansa x Margaery x Dany modern au that went with a Lana Del Rey song and I think about it a lot.

What tags do you avoid like the plague? man idk

What AU do you wish to write but feel like you won’t manage? I really like college/high school aus, but I’ve never actually written one. 

Do you outline or write as you go? I usually just write as I go and daydream scenes to really over-the-top playlists, but I’ve discovered that I actually really like outlining. I think I’m going to do more outlining in the future.

What has been your favorite story to write so far? The Captain Marvel fic I just completed a draft for is my favorite because I proved a lot to myself about what I can do as a writer, like that I can start a larger writing project and actually finish it. It was also super cathartic to write it.

Do you prefer to write one-shots or multi-chapters? Why? I don’t really know which one I prefer. I like the feeling of working on a multi-chapter story, but one-shots are fun. After writing my huge novella length fic though, I’m kinda like...ready to write something short.

What is your favorite kind of comment? Umm every comment? Please talk to me about this thing I worked on?

Why did you start writing fanfiction? Why are you still writing it? I started writing fanfiction because I’m a nerd and I keep writing it because I’m still a nerd and it’s fun. Hell yeah.

Tagging @kyliekaemke and anyone that wants to do this! Go talk about yourself and your fics!

[stuckybingo]

FAQ - All your questions answered!

I made an FAQ page for desktop users and here comes the corresponding post since mobile users can’t access pages!

Under the cut to not clog up dashes!

What’s a bingo?

A bingo the fandom way is an event where you get a card divided in 25 squares, 24 of those are prompts and the last one is a Free Space to use as you wish!

Each of those square is to be used to create new Stucky content and can be interpreted in any way you want!

If a square says “Skinny Steve” for example, you can do something with Skinny Steve as a character, or Steve remembering what it was like back in the 40s or Bucky’s relationship to Skinny Steve etc…

What type of prompts can I expect?

First, you’ll be asked to choose between a SFW card and a NSFW one.

Then, you’ll be able to select any or all of the following categories to be added to your card:

Types of AUs, Fluff Prompts, Angst Prompts, Fandom/Pairing specific tropes & Random prompts and Characters.

If you chose to receive a NSFW card, Kinks and NSFW squares will be added to your prompts as well.

Can I combine prompts into one fill?

That’s a no. One fill = One square.

What you can do on the other hand, is make a multi-chaptered fic where one chapter stands for one square!

What you can also do is combine a square from our Stucky bingo with a square from another bingo you signed-up to! Provided that the other event allows it as well, not all of them do so be careful!

Can I repost old fics?

That’s also a no. Anything posted for this event needs to be new and specifically created for it. What you could do is post a story for an on-going series of yours if the story you write can stand on its own.

This is, of course, all a matter of good faith as we will not be checking every single fill to make sure you’re not dusting off 78764-year-old works. Play fair? ;)

Do I have to make fills for all my squares?

No, you do not have to make fills for all 25 of your squares. This is a low pressure event and as such, even if all you do by the 23rd of December 2019 is one fill, it’s all good! And you know why? Because the reason for this event is to create new content for the fandom to enjoy and admire and you will have done exactly that! Well done you!

Ok, but what if I do make fills for all my squares?

Then, first, Great job!! Congratulations to you! You’ve earned the right to request a second card to keep going if you feel like it!

And if you blackout that one as well? OMG, you are a true champ! Do you want to keep going? Keep those creative juices a-flowin’? Ask for a third card!

You’ll have to fill in the sign-up form again for any new card you request. The reason for that being that maybe, since the last time you asked for a card you preferred method of contact has changes, or your DNWs did or even your AO3 username! So we’ll have all that info updated and we can go on to create together in perfect sync! :)

What can i create for this event?

ANYTHING YOU WANT!

For those of you who want specifics? Here comes:

Fics, Art (using ANY medium at your disposal: traditional or digital drawing & painting, sketches, watercolors, stained-glass, sculpture…Moodboards, Edits&Manips, Gifsets…), Fanvids, Podfics, Rec lists (at least 3 fics that match your square), Playlists (at least 8 songs that match your square)…

Shoot us an ask if your preferred creating process isn’t on here or if you still have a doubt, chances are, it’s all cool!

Can i write in another language?

Absolutely!! Whether it’s because you want to try writing in this language you’ve been learning and think it would be great or because English isn’t your mothertongue and you still want to write Stucky: please, go for it! Show us how much of a globetrotting pairing Stucky is!

Can I translate fics?

Provided that you get the consent of the author’s and that you credit them once you post your translation then yes! Same logic as before: we want to be spreading the Stucky love across borders and those include language barriers!

Can I collaborate with someone else?

Yes! By all means! You want to create with a friend (or someone you just met because why not?) then go for it!

And if this person is also participating in the bingo you can use a square each for your collaboration!

Do I have to post my fills anywhere?

No. You don’t have to post anywhere, you are welcome to simply create whatever Stucky content you want with your card. That said, we would love to see what you make if you do share!

How do I get my posts featured on the blog?

There are several ways for this to happen actually!

If you post to the AO3 Collection then we’ll share your fic/art directly using the “Share” button at the top (your settings need to allow it though!).

If you post here on Tumblr, then you need to do either or both the following: use the #stuckybingo2019 in the first five tags of your post (or we won’t be able to see it) and tag the blog with @stuckybingo2019!

If you’re posting your content on another platform than these two then choose “Submit a Post” (in the menu on desktop, or using the dialogue bubble on mobile). You can then create a new post for us to share without forgetting to add the link and applicable content warning!

!! Remember the sharing format we need you to use with all applicable items is:

// Title / Creator / Square Filled / Rating / Warnings / Summary / Link //

When can I start creating?

The very moment you get your card, you’re good to go!

Seeing this after Aug, 1st?

You can still request a card via email at stuckybingo@gmail.com! Please state if you want a SFW or a NSFW card, your DNWs and the username you use on the platform you’ll be posting on! You’ll receive your card asap but please note that no changes will be made to it!

Any other question? Please hit the ask button, or send us an email, or, when you receive the link to it, shoot us a question in the #modshelp channel on the discord server!

Happy creating!

-mod Marie