#and though they shouldn't be separated because they need each other in different ways

[tenebriism]

Do you have any headcanons or thoughts about Aymeric's relationship with Estinien?

// I do, yes. Aymeric and Estinien's bond took some time to become a favorite of mine, I'll admit, and that's likely because it took me a while to understand and warm up to Estinien himself. How close they really, TRULY are didn't hit me until the scene where Aymeric is sitting at Estinien's bedside, and then I went 'oh. OH,' and proceeded to cling to the idea of them from then on.

They're so different from each other. They share the same values and wants, but it's like the golden retriever puppydog with the stoic, clad in shadow wolf.

Aymeric is the guiding light, the leader, the one who steps forward and does not hesitate to be the face of hope and strength for his people and his friends, while Estinien fights for the very same thing, but from the shadows. He's often posted off to the side, in the corner or against the wall, just listening. Observing. But, best believe if you need him? He's also there, just like Aymeric. They are so ALIKE but so different at the same time, and I absolutely eat UP that sort of dynamic.

There are also a lot of complexities, too. Estinien is Aymeric's best friend and most cherished confidant, besides maybe Lucia, and even then, his bond with HER is largely professional. He longs for and greatly enjoys Estinien's company, even despite knowing his best friend isn't one for idle chitchat or opening up; Estinien LISTENS, though, and listens well, and Aymeric is comfortable being vulnerable in front of Estinien, where he can't be vulnerable in front of anyone else (and for someone who's leading a nation that's still recovering and rebuilding, the need and opportunity to be vulnerable are CRUCIAL, lest Aymeric crumble beneath the weight of it all).

Their bond, understandably, is very tense in Heavensward, but when it all comes to a close and that new, hopeful chapter begins, paving the road to eventual happiness and prosperity in Ishgard, I think that sense of longing that Aymeric has (and does well to hide) almost hurts him, to some tragic and sad extent. He's proud of his friend and is eager to watch him grow stronger, to travel, to be more ESTINIEN than he is the AZURE DRAGOON, but... then he remembers how strained everything has been. How he almost lost Estinien MULTIPLE times (and Estinien almost lost him once, with the assassination attempt.) How he wonders how Estinien feels about him, if Estinien is proud of him, if Estinien would ever come to call Ishgard HOME just like Aymeric does. He thinks about Estinien quite often in both good and bad ways, and I'd say it almost consumes him.

fklwalkflkwa ahhh I'm RAMBLING, but I just... I feel so strongly about them both. ;_; It makes me want to play through Heavensward again so I can approach the expansion with this new mindset, and maybe even catch things that I didn't the first go-round. The fact that both of them still mention each other in the expansions that follow, even being regions upon regions apart, it just... UGGGGH, they're so important to one another and I'm CRYING.

[nicollekidman]

Waitttt please talk more about tashiart bc i see most ppl slander Art specifically even zendaya (which surprised me) but to me it was always art for tashi even when they first meet its clear she prefers art and wants his number, she wants art to win so badly because she wants their family but also because she wants to respect him

yeah i absolutely agree i think with the standard caveats that they all need each other in different ways and the beauty of the movie is it's up for interpretation etc etc etc

art and tashi have a different dynamic from the drop than tashi and patrick. patrick has the swagger and the bluster and he pushes at tashi like he pushes at art, but the way art chooses his words is much more careful (you screamed) and i think immediately pings to her that he has what she needs (discipline, awareness, insightfulness) in a very particular way that patrick doesn't. also i think it shouldn't be overlooked that she clocks in the hotel room that patrick is hung up on art even though art is focused on her, so i think her awareness of patrick's emotional unavailability (as it were) colors her choices going forward. like... knowing that art is tuned into her and is malleable and willing, while patrick might have the fire but he's already not aligned with her (their) priorities and the Thing that separates them is confidence, not necessarily skill..... "you can beat him. you should beat him" is her choice and its also a test.

and like. he fails it in that moment because it's a test patrick is also participating in!! but patrick and tashi don't have enough between them to sustain them, they're all bark and no real bite because he's not serious or disciplined enough to be a viable partner for her, even before she needs a surrogate. they clearly have a lot of spark but you can't sustain that. she likes when patrick pushes her but she doesn't respect him.

fast forward to 13 years of marriage.......... i get that people have the impulse to say that tashi only loves tennis or tashi can't love art because he's a lapdog or they want her to be a girlboss or whatever but like. those two deeply want/need each other it's just much more difficult for her to communicate that kind of connection than it is with patrick because patrick is simpler. he doesn't demand anything form her really, besides her anger and her body (occasionally), and both of them still exist as teenagers with endless potential in his mind, which is safe. but art is demanding everything from her, even as he's reciprocating by giving her literally every piece of himself, the way he nursed her through her injuries and she his means that like. she can't hide anywhere. so like they're not verbalizing things the same way patrick does, but the devotion is there. she never ever stops telling art he can beat patrick, and when she's not sure, she begs patrick to lose so that there's never any danger of her having to make that choice.

and like. i think art and tashi could be happy without tennis, but i think the point is that she doesn't know because they've never had to try, and even the possibility that she'd lose it all if art doesn't have it in him is enough to make her humble herself in front of patrick. which she has no reason to do unless she wants to keep him. like. they've built an entire life together, she's built art into who he is but that's a two-way process. and they end up inviting patrick back into the fold which enriches their lives and gives them the boost they need but ultimately it's still them inviting patrick into the life they've built together. i don't think it's a happy ending or really a story at all unless you think tashi loves art desperately.

[flutterbyoz]

5 OTPs and 1 ultimate OTP

Deciding on my ultimate OTP was the easy part, it was picking the 5 others that took some time. I've had many ships over the years, some I obsessed over more than others but these are what I decided on as my top 5.

John/Aeryn - Farscape

John and Aeryn were one of my very first ships, before I even really knew what shipping was. I discovered them back in the very early 2000s and quickly fell head over heels for them. For a wacky, crazy, sexy and wonderfully weird sci-fi show, Farscape told one of the best love stories I've ever seen. The chemistry, the natural build up, the tension and their whole journey's, individually and together makes these two one of the best ships ever.

Sometimes it seems shows can be reluctant to put their two leads together, even when they are clearly right for each other, because they think it won't be as interesting once they are romantically involved. However, Farscape proved that with good writing it can work exceptionally well and add to the story in such a positive way. They also stayed clear of some of the more cliched storytelling, not just when it came to John and Aeryn's romance but the series in general. Farscape gave us a truly memorable romance and after 4 seasons it was finished up in the most perfect way in a miniseries.

For over 2 decades, John and Aeryn were my ultimate OTP, even when I found new ships I always came back to them because they were written so amazingly well and got the happy ending that many of my other ships never did. They had drama, angst and they even both died on separate occasions but they won out and the mini series gave them the perfect happy ending. John and Aeryn will always hold a special place in my heart, they are an example of how love stories can be told right.

Hetty and Trevor - Ghosts US

Okay, this is a very new ship for me having only discovered them at the end of last year and I really couldn't help but fall for them. Hetty and Trevor are two people who really shouldn't work together at all but somehow they really do. Ridiculous, hilarious and adorable, these two just drew me in but what's a little different for me from my other ships is I'm still not sure whether I want them to be a true romantic couple or if I just want them to get back to where they were in season 2. Their hook ups were so wonderful and they play off each other so well that I just really need these two to get back together in some way. Ghosts US writers, please make it happen, these two have way too much potential and chemistry to be pushed aside. I need more H-Money in my life!

Jack and Sam - Stargate SG1

Jack and Sam were a ship who were never explicitly said to be together but there were many hints, in later seasons, that they were. Rules and regulations pretty much forbad a romantic relationship, though in many alternate realities they were together. The feelings between them were clear, showing themselves at various moments throughout the series, some more subtle than others but they were always present in some form. This is another pairing who had wonderful chemistry on and off screen and I love them both dearly. I know Jack and Sam are together and living happily ever after, I won't except anything else.

Xena and Gabrielle - Xena: Warrior Princess

Another ship where it was never explicitly said in the show they were together but was very much implied. These two are beautiful and had this show been made today, they most definitely would have been together. I've had a few F/F ships over the years, one which hurt me quite badly despite actually getting a happy ending and another which has yet to really set sail but Xena and Gabrielle, though I wish their ending was different, are still a ship I return to quite often and are still very dear to me.

Miranda and Gary - Miranda

Miranda and Gary are the most adorable ship and I love them to pieces. I'm not often a fan of ships in sitcoms, for some reason they don't seem to hit the right notes for me but there is something about these two and how their story was told that I just fell in love with. They really bring out the best in each other, they get each other on a level that few others do and they get their happy ending, which it seems isn't always a thing for many of my ships. Miranda is a show I can watch over and over, it's one of my comfort shows and always picks me up if I'm feeling down. They are just the most lovable and sweet ship and just make me so happy.

Honourable mentions:

Jo and Bill - Twister

Connie and Jacob - Casualty

Iain and Lily - Casualty

Jeff and Tamzin - Casualty

Lara and Patrick - Casualty

Jack and Rose - Titanic

Claire and Owen - Jurassic World trilogy

Ten and Rose - Doctor Who

Caitlyn and Vi - Arcane

Evan and Dylan - Primeval New World

Jack and Rose - Titanic

John and Maureen - Lost In Space

Now comes my ultimate OTP and it could only really be one couple

Rick and Michonne (Richonne) - The Walking Dead

Now, what can I say to describe these two beautiful people and their amazing love story?

Finding such a gorgeous love story in a show with zombies was never something I thought I'd do, I never thought it would be the kind of show I'd watch either but here we are. I discovered Richonne during a search on Tumblr for another ship I was into at the time, a ship which sadly did not end well, but I did find these two so something positive came out of it. I was drawn in by GIFS, their chemistry and connection shone through in just a few seconds and I was so intrigued to find out more about them. I watched TWD just for them and in all honesty they are the only reason I still keep up with the show.

Richonne have something I've not seen in any other ship I've had, though I'm not sure I can quite put my finger on what that is. Their chemistry is electric and so natural that they really make the love story believable and realistic. Andy and Dania's off screen friendship is also beautiful, the love, care and trust they have for each other is clear to see and I love watching their off screen interactions too. They really are friendship goals! Plus they are just as big Richonne shippers as us and it makes me love them even more.

Rick and Michonne are one of a kind, they are in a league of their own when it comes to chemistry and storytelling and are the only ship I've had that not only have their own show dedicated to their love story, but both actors are also co-creators, co-writers and executive producers. Not only that but Danai wrote an episode herself and I don't think I'm exaggerating here when I say it is one of the best episodes in the history of TWD. Though to me it is the best.

From the moment they met at the fence to the final scene in TOWL 1x06, Richonne have proved time and time again why they are not only the best couple on TWD but to me, the best couple to have ever graced my screen. They could give lessons on how a love story should be told, how longing, romance and deep unbreakable love should be portrayed on screen. They love each other so purely, so intensely and so completely that it's palpable and being the love of each others lives is not just assumed but proved and vocalised too.

This is a couple who are both warriors, they have had to resort to extreme measures to survive and to keep the people they love safe and while that is one side to them, they are also very soft, gentle and loving with each other. They are both willing to do anything to keep each other and their kids safe.

Also, they are both extremely attractive people who make an insanely good looking couple!

This is why Richonne is my ultimate OTP and I have a feeling they may just remain in that spot forever.

[seventeenlovesthree]

Digimon Adventure subtext analysis: The other family angle

Years ago, I had already tried to conduct an analysis on how Taichi, Hikari and Koushirou were set up in a way that displayed the importance of family within their bond [I, II, III]. The conclusion there was that, by closing his own family-related arc, Koushirou was capable of supporting Taichi and Hikari's (also indirectly family-related) struggles in the Dark Master's arc as well. In a very similar vain, it can be argued that Sora, Yamato and Takeru were set up similarly. The hypothesis here is that, by mirroring Sora's and Yamato's (and Takeru's) familial issues, they're capable of supporting each other in the final arc as well.

Let's see how these familial parallels and similarities play out:

While it can be argued that the majority of the characters keep their family-related trauma to themselves, in Sora's and Yamato's cases, it has the biggest effect on the group dynamic as a whole. Because while Taichi, for example, starts to get reckless in order NOT TO get reckless and protect everyone he loves, Sora's and Yamato's instinct is to pull away from everyone and everything to protect them, even if they may declare the opposite to be true. (Mind you, that is actually some kind of behaviour Taichi will adopt in Tri onwards as well, but that shall not be the point of this analysis.)

The most obvious parallel between them is that they have rather disruptive family lives. While Sora's parents aren't divorced, they're still not living together and her relationship to her mother is rather rocky, filled with misunderstandings based on expectations and different views on life. Yamato's and Takeru's parents are divorced and Yamato has a rather difficult time approaching his mother himself, telling her how he really feels about it all, etc. He tends to surround himself with an aura of coolness and aloofness, even though the viewer quickly learns that he is very emotional and is just trying to bottle it all up.

In the novels it is implied that Sora may have known that Yamato and Takeru were brothers from the very beginning - so her deflecting or not prying further into their lives at the start of the series, especially when Taichi and Koushirou are speculating about their relationship, makes sense. Because she understands that they need space.

And Yamato returns the favour later on, letting her cry it all out; when Sora is experiencing her outburst of emotions in her Crest episode, the viewer learns that she has been doing the same thing as Yamato: bottle it all up. In the same way, they are both prone to wanting to figure out how to deal with their "inner states" by themselves, they're both not particularly good at talking it all out - and so it shouldn't be surprising that they understand that aspect about the other and give each other time and space to breathe. It's not something everybody in the group understands, but it is a very distinctive parallel: Sora basically explains to them that she kept away from the group because she hadn't figured herself out yet. Thus, Sora explaining Takeru that Yamato needs time to do some soul-searching himself is a direct follow-up response here. She sensed Yamato's need to do this on his own and followed it up by the promise that Takeru would be safe in his absence.

Takeru is a good keyword at this point as well, because similarly to how Hikari was a focal point in the other analysis, he is the key factor that makes the family angle so apparent. Yamato may be the one to give Sora space - but Takeru is the one who tells Sora what she desperately needed to hear. He wants to keep the family together at all costs, he is fed up with separation scenes, so he doesn't want her to leave again, sees her as "family", wants her to know how valued and loved she is - and so, Sora is the one who reassures Takeru when Yamato is on the brink of leaving himself, believing that, eventually, everything will turn out fine. It may look like nothing more than repetitive behaviour at first - but it is a circle of learning and trust instead, to rekindle and have better family dynamics in the future.

It's due to their strained relationships with their parents, their masks, their coping mechanisms that Sora and Yamato think they don't have what it takes to activate or even deserve their respective Crests. Love and Friendship - they don't know what it means for them personally. It's why they're so prone to being engulfed by darkness, why their dark caves are dangerous manifestations of their declining mental health, self-doubt and fears.

That is why the soul-searching is needed, repeatedly so. It's why they understand each other's need to be left alone - which is something we will see throughout the entirety of the Adventure series for both of them. But it's also why they need Takeru's softness and Taichi's persistence (as well as Jyou's support and Mimi's reassurance at different times) to get it back together again. They have to be reminded that they don't HAVE TO be alone in all this (even if they often choose to).

They know, deep down inside, that self-pity and giving in is not an option. They do ask themselves why they got into this situation, why they were chosen in the first place - but they also learn, through their experiences (and their respective bonds with and urge to support Taichi) that they're the ones who have the choice. To fight or to stay away - it's going to be their choice, again and again.

In the novels, the sight of Sora and Takeru together, right after he broke out of his own cave of darkness, even reminds Yamato of his mother, indicating that the entire journey is helping him to come to terms with slowly wanting to reconcile with her.

In general, Sora's role in the Dark Master's arc is mirrored by Koushirou's - they're support systems for the Yagami siblings (and Taichi and Yamato in combat), but Sora in particular is also often put together with the younger siblings, protecting them (enforcing her motherly role) or actually fighting alongside them (in more equal matters). In addition, she is acting as a bridge between the Takaishida brothers, especially in the final arc in which she is the one who throws Yamato's keychain at Takeru, thus helping him to overcome his own insecurities as well and eventually activating his Crest of Hope himself.

Long story short; Sora had already been on her way of reconciliation with her own mother and, after everything she went through, was able to reassure Yamato that he could go on to find his own path as she did hers before, believing that he could do it too. In return, Yamato had been put - and eventually also put himself - in the position to pull Sora out of her own state of darkness as well. Because he had been there himself, he was finally able to put things into words. Because, at this point in time, they're both incredibly similar - and may have gained what it takes to make up with their mothers.

[mpixx]

cattonquick buffy au pt. 5

cn: sex pollen...again

"So, umm..." Felix looks at Oliver who looks a little pale around the nose.

He clears his throat, then continues speaking into his phone, holding the vial against the light. "So the, quote, "horny potion", you brought earlier...if it had been accidentally ingested...under the assumption that it was, say, vanilla flavoring..."

"They really should IQ test people before they make them the Chosen One," Venetia sighs at the other end of the line.

Oliver looks at him like he really wants to know what Venetia is saying.

"So what would happen. Theoretically?"

"It's a horny potion, Felix. What it says on the tin."

"Well, it doesn't say anything on the tin - which is the problem."

"It will make you very horny."

"Fuck," he says, letting his head fall back, baring his throat. He just wanted to make a nice vanilla latte for Ollie and himself.

When he raises his head again, Oliver is pacing the library, clenching and unclenching his hands.

"So is it like a..." Felix cups his hand around his mouth and lowers his voice so Oliver doesn't hear. "A fuck or die situation?"

"It's not a fuck or die, it's just very likely that y'all fuck."

"Because it's a horny potion."

"Yes, Felix."

"Can you give me the phone?" Oliver is suddenly standing in front of him, wiggling his hand. "Err...sure." He passes the phone to Oliver, who starts pacing again.

"Mm-hm. Ok. Mm-hm. Ok. Ok. Ok. Thanks, Vee." Oliver pockets Felix's phone. Then, he walks over to the library door and locks it. The way he does it with such finality sends a little shiver down Felix's spine.

Oliver turns around. "We need to quarantine."

"Okay." Felix nods.

"Until it wears off. Which could be anywhere between an hour and the whole night."

He sits down at the table across from Felix.

They stare at each other.

"At least it's not a fuck or die," Felix offers.

Oliver's eyes turn wide and his mouth opens, before he shakes his head. "Uh." He blinks. "Yeah."

Silence again. Oliver starts folding and re-folding his hands on top of the table while Felix bounces his leg under it.

"We'll just wait it out," Oliver says.

Felix nods.

"Shouldn't we be in different rooms, tho?"

"Oh," Oliver says. "Right. Um...I can go into the back room? You can stay here?"

"Probably better."

"Yeah."

"It will be really boring in separate rooms, though," Felix points out.

"We can split up once it starts working."

"Yeah," Felix says. "Once it starts working."

***

They've fidgeted, alternating between staring at each other and pointedly looking away for about 15 minutes, when Oliver asks: "Do you feel something?"

Felix swallows. "I don't know. Maybe? You?"

"Yeah. A little."

Oliver's hand is still on the table as Felix reaches out. Oliver lets out a little gasp as Felix's fingertips skim his knuckles. Felix's fingers twitch as well. It's like a little electrical shock, except a lot more pleasurable.

He can't help but smile. "Did you feel that?"

Oliver is smiling, too. "Yeah."

Oliver mimics the motion, the pads of his fingers brushing over Felix's knuckles now, then their fingers brush together. "Feels good," Oliver says quietly. "Yeah," Felix agrees, throat clicking as he swallows hard.

He is painfully aware that they said they were gonna go to separate rooms once it starts working. And Felix is pretty sure it has started working. Yet, neither of them are bringing up the separate rooms thing. And he'll be damned if he does - if Oliver won't.

"Any...anything else?" Oliver asks. Their fingers are still touching on the table.

"I also feel like I would like to kiss you right now," Felix says.

"Do you think it would be weird..."

"I don't think it would be weird...," Felix barely finishes before their mouths connect and his hands wrap around Oliver's wrists.

They're in this awkward position between sitting and standing so Felix stands up and lifts Oliver onto the table. Oliver lets out a little gasp, then kisses him again, clumsy and eager, his hands curling around Felix's biceps.

It feels so good. So, so good. It's not normal, that's for sure. In fact, Felix is starting to think giving in to the potion was a bad idea because he is afraid nothing will ever compare to the way Oliver's nose bumps his, or Oliver's little mouth slips off his jaw, or the way Oliver's legs squeeze hard around him as Felix picks him up with ease and presses him into a bookshelf.

"Why does this feel so good?" he whispers into Oliver's hair. It's like his skin is on fire, and he knows Oliver must feel the same because he's gasping and sighing at every touch of Felix's hands and mouth on his skin like it's the best thing he's ever felt.

They're on the desk at some point, because Felix can't undress Oliver while holding him up against the shelf, and then they're on the couch because it's softer than the desk, and then, maybe, they start it all over again, he's not sure, it's just...

***

Afterwards, they're laying on one of the couches together, Oliver in his arm, wearing Felix's hoodie because he got cold. It should feel awkward, with them being colleagues and all, but it doesn't. It just feels right.

They're both looking down at their tangled hands, fingertips brushing over knuckles. Felix wonders if that's gonna be their thing - when his phone rings.

He finds it in Oliver's chinos which are on the floor next to the desk.

"Vee?" He walks back to the couch, sits back in his previous spot so Oliver can lean against his chest again.

"Yeah, Felix? I just wanted to say, all clear. I have the potion right here - I didn't leave it at the library."

"...........oh."

"What's up?" Oliver asks in his arm, turning his chin up to look at Felix, his blue eyes soft and a little cross-eyed without his glasses.

Felix puts the phone down without saying goodbye.

"So, umm...funny story..."

[one-strugling-bean]

Thinking abt Hater n Peeps...

thinking about how they probably started out as friends with similar interests. Two losers with a damaged heart and a need to feel respected (and loved) meet and decide to conquer the world that wronged them before together

Thinking how at first they probably saw each other as more of a means to an end: ill make him do all the boring paperwork stuff while I actually conquer everything vs ill let him believe he's the number one and show his face while I pull the strings from behind type of shit. but eventually grew to appreciate each other's company, found interests in common, and went through shit that forced them to grow closer

(especially since they were probably each other's first friend. imagine the giddiness over finding someone you just click with after a whole life of being lonely)

thinking bout how much hater must have soaked in peepers praise from the start. Peepers being the 1st person to have ever called him cool. to support his dreams. even if hater hides it under a "sure you can tag along, if you do everything I say" kind of facade, he actually becomes super addicted to (and dependent on) peeps right from the get-go

Thinking bout how peepers must have been the opposite. He sees the potential hater has from the start, but for all the praise and admiration to become more than a way of manipulation it takes a bit. Still, it's only a small matter of time before peeps drowns in all the charisma and power being with hater brings. besides, he's found in Hater companionship the likes of he'd never felt before with anyone.

When he decides to make Hater the nº1 villain in all the galaxy, he knows he's sealing his fate - but he doesn't regret it one bit.

They essentially become best friends (also each other's 1st and only friend), though they never properly talk about it because ew feelings, and "they're supposed to be villains, and villains aren't friends". but they still see each other as friends and act accordingly

but then their pipe dream actually starts looking like it could work, and what before sounded like a make-believe game the two played with each other while they travelled the galaxy together, starts looking like a reality

They are ecstatic. they buy a customized ship. peepers convinces his people to fight for their cause and suddenly they have an army as well! hater steadily learns how to behave like a terrifying overlord instead of an edgy teen, and suddenly their fame is spreading everywhere!

they're unstoppable! hater is on his way to becoming the biggest threat to the galaxy and peepers is the 2nd in command that made it all happen! everything is perfect!

then, hater hurts peepers with his powers for the first time and things are... different.

They're both shocked that 1st time. hater has hurt many people by that point, but he never lost control on someone close to him. even if he was upset... peepers is also shocked because by that point he trusted hater with his life. he saw himself as a valuable part of their team, - their partnership! it felt like a betrayal. to both of them, actually

and slowly, these excuses become the reality. hater hurting peepers physically and verbally becomes the norm, and perhaps in an unconscious bout of retaliation, peepers becomes hater's biggest critic, just as he is his biggest fan. He's the first to point out hater's mistakes (under whats acceptable of him) knowing exactly where to press on his insecurities to make it hurt more

but they don't talk about it, just like they never talked about whether they were friends before, so separately, they start making excuses. Hater is the leader - the greatest Villain in the Galaxy - of course he shouldn't spare anyone! and Peepers is working for him right? If he makes a mistake, of course he should be punished! they were always using each other for their own goals

...there can't exist a betrayal of something that never existed, right?

they stop hanging out informally as much because "they're not friends it's just a mutual partnership". they still do hang out sometimes, because they're still lonely and have no other friends but its less... carefree

time passes and the empire grows. the more it does, the more they fall into their make-believe roles - the evil villain and his assistant. hater becomes crueler, peepers becomes more obsessed with his work (and crueler) and slowly they lose that spark that started them out in the 1st place

Then wander and sylvia come around and the make-belief starts to crack.

things start getting out of control. Hater's cruelty doesn't kill the enemies. peepers work isn't efficient enough. the two are once more thrown into unlikely situations together that force them to be closer, and the occasional chaos breaks the carefully crafted characters they'd built over themselves for so long.

they start being seen as jokes again. the empire is losing its edge and so are they. all the while, they start losing that shadow of subordination that had been controlling their relationship for so long

but wounds and misunderstandings have been piling up for years, and there's only so much "casually hanging out with my friend-turned-toxic workplace relationship-turned-sorta friend again" they can do before something gives

and by the end of season 2, hater's fate seems inevitable - he'll let go of villainy sooner or later. but what about peepers? the other half of the same pipe dream, the other half of the same messy relationship.

Was he gonna be able to let go of it too? What was going to weigh heavier in the end? The fractured friendship? or the pipe dream?

were they meant to be able to solve their issues and regain that initial connection that drove them to conquer the stars together in the first place? Or just... break apart, for good.

...god i rly want a season 3

[lefluoritesys]

It's so weird to feel excluded in DID spaces because... we don't suffer 24/7. And I mean we don't suffer so much, we actually have a good experience with DID most of the time, and it genuienly helps us survive. Like we're not perfect, of course, but the good overrides the bad, and most of our problems don't come from alters.

I could pop in to front and ask an alter at front to not talk to somebody, or do something for me, and they would. If they have questions, they'd ask. Like, "Hey, I don't like this person... can you be careful around them?" or "Don't share that info about me", and they'd be like "Okay, cool" and move on.

We found ways to differenciate between each other, and sometimes dissociation actually makes us feel better. Because with too many alters in front, we can temporarily dissociate into one blob that would let us function. Best part? It lets us use all the roles of alters inf ront at once as this one blob. Temporary merging that isn't really temporary merging, to be honest... I have no idea how else to describe it. it is but it isn't. And even if there is dissociation, it's not cause of alters, it's cause of our brain being a bitch.

I sometimes lean back in my chair in the front room when I'm in control of the body, turn to our physical persecutor (who also happens to be my best friend), and go, "Hey, you good if I do homework on your subject today?" And they go, "Sure. You sure you can do it tho? Like, do you have memories of how?" And I'd go, "I think so, I just don't wanna switch rn, I'll call you if I need help, though." And they'd go "Cool."

Like, don't get me wrong, we have had problems. But they were never because somebody was bad, they were because of people's actions that were honestly mostly fueled by being abused, trauma, and figuring out how to properly function. No one was ever the problem. We have alters who are just awful, but that's a separate problem. People in front for us are lovely. Sometimes we have fights, sometimes we have relapses, sometimes we just have horrible things happen to each other or IRL or something else. But no one is ever the problem. We never had that mentality that DID, and our alters, were the problem. Their actions are sometimes, but not them as separate personalities. Actually, we had problems with each other and with DID because people outside told us we should. DID improved our lives, and the areas that it didn't, we never saw it as it "ruined" them, it just... made them harder, and told us there are different ways we need to go about daily stuff and life. To each other, we're literally just people with mental health issues who are trying to make the body functional, but also? We're even kinda happy to be here. And if not happy, at the very least neutral enough not to want to become one.

It's so weird hanging around here, having a blog dedicated to spread positivity about DID, kinda being like:

"Hello, we are actually... functional. And would have always been if people didn't try to convince us otherwise out of their own misery and want for everyone else to be miserable."

We have issues, but they're not because of DID, DID actually helps us with them. It doesn't make us feel invalid, I don't think, but it does make us question whether we belong in DID community. And we have a lot of alters with low empathy, somehow, that makes us more compassionate? It's such a weird problem to have. It shouldn't even be a problem but here we are.

-host

[feladi-fority]

haven't posted in a while, but I completed Undertale Yellow a while ago and none of my friends have and I need to scream into the void about it SOMEWHERE! Spoilers abound

So, Flowey. He's really well written in this. In Undertale proper we don't get to see much of him and what we do see is really 1 note. He scares you, tries to manipulate people, and tries to hurt people for his own amusement. In Undertale Yellow though we get to see how immature and impatient he is. Whenever Clover does something Flowey doesn't approve of he lashes out even when doing so directly impedes his ability to manipulate Clover, such as killing Marlet at the end of the neutral route. Flowey is a terrible manipulator, putting in absolutely zero effort to understand Clover, instead blaming them for his own plan not working. He talks about how much he hates Clover and relishes in their death but Flowey has done nothing to understand Clover, instead just viewing them as a problem to brute-force a solution to. All of this is, of course, consistent with who Flowey was in Undertale but it's so much more textured with how much screen-time Flowey gets.

Additionally, I find the implications of what I can only describe as Flowey's Blackspace. During the meta-Flowey fight his attacks are monstrous versions of himself, many of which are killed as part of his attacks. He pulls out his own pedals, cries to attack, and kills images of himself. Then there's the section where you walk through piles of Flowey corpses which call for help. The dialogue the later corpses give is ambiguous, but lines like "this must be it" in the context of the rest takes on a dark implication. Flowey seems to hate himself and view himself as a monster who deserves to be cut-down (he has that in common with his dad lol). Maybe then Flowey's plan to destroy the world via collecting the souls is ultimately self destructive, a way to go down with the world, and rid himself of the possibility of coming back, a true completion through obliteration.

Now I need to talk about Marlet. She's fucking great. She has this deep sense of maturity to her character which was really cool to see. It isn't all that clear in the pacifist route as there we mainly see her inability to get things done and her self-hate, but on the more violent routes we see her constantly trying to empathize and resolve conflict with Clover by understanding them. I think it's incredibly note-worthy that Marlet is the only character who recognizes Clover as a child who shouldn't be capable of committing such violence, and the implications of that fact. Marlet doesn't let her emotions stop her from understanding people and doing the right thing, and I really like how that was executed.

I loved the themes of this game. I expected the game to tackle similar themes to Undertale, either just recreate theme entirely or at least tackle something similar to Undertale's very meta exploration about what it means to care about things. Instead this game goes for an old classic, the cycle of violence, and I think it executes it very well!

Throughout the game characters interact with this theme in different ways. Clover (on the vengeance route specifically), and Ceroba parallel each-other in this way. Ceroba objectifies humans due to her position as a monster separated from humanity and growing up with an adversarial relationship to them. Chujin finds it extremely easy to hate humanity for a slight against him and enacts violence on humanity due to perceiving them as inherently evil due to historical mistreatment by humans and personal experience. This violence horrifies him in the end, but still in his attempt to get vengeance he perpetuates the cycle, projecting his hate towards humanity onto Ceroba who goes onto hurt more people because of it. Clover on the vengeance route is in a similar position, objectifying monsters due to being a human separate from them and learning of slights against humanity by them. Clover finds out monsters killed 5 humans (either all children, or some of them children) and is able to easily objectify them for it due to their position. Clover enacts disproportionate violence in reaction to the violence monsters committed against humanity in reaction to the violence humanity enacted against monsters by sealing them underground. Asgore remarks at the end of the vengeance route that Clover's actions will result in many more deaths on both side's parts, and he's right, Clover provided more reason for another Chujin to come about and enact more violence on humanity which in turn would provoke a response. Violence creates violence creates violence.

Flowey, under this framing, becomes an embodiment of the cycle. The game cleverly uses the power of resetting as the mechanical manifestation of this cycle. Flowey continues to reset events over and over and over letting Clover get killed over and over and over, just as the cycle of violence repeats, so to does the game itself. The game resets, new runs provide new content, certain events are enshrined in this game's concept of fate. The fate here is just that things cannot change with more violent inputs, Flowey can never get what he wants because he's incapable of doing what Marlet could do. Flowey can't change fate because he's what's locking it in place, he's the logic of violence that forces the world to over and over again punish characters and kill them, but Marlet through her empathy and compassion at least tries to break the cycle, she tries to get Clover to stop hurting people and break this repeated cycle of violence, and she does the same for Ceroba and Chujin to less success. How fitting then that Flowey kills Marlet in the neutral route.

Pacifist Clover is the parallel to Marlet. They face the cycle of violence and chose to understand and help others despite it. The vision for breaking the cycle that Undertale Yellow provides is empathy and compassion, choosing to not give into anger at horrible things done to you as to not perpetuate that being done to more people in the future. It's a really well-executed theme, I love this game.

[shadyauthor]

Strings of their hearts 💕 ch 3!!

TW this chapter WILL BE ANGSTY?? And kinda dark!

Yawning you got up and stretched before powering down your PC, it was nearing 3 in the morning and if you were exhausted yesterday,it would be worse today. You almost wanted to cancel, but you couldn't do that to your friends, after everything they've done for you? After they've always been there for you? Almost. Almost always.

You shook your head, you shouldn't let your thoughts spiral again down a slippery slope of negativity. Though you did know they had a group chat exclusively to talk bad about you, they did talk bad about you right in front of your face when they thought you weren't listening, the sly mean comments they'd make under their breath...but it was all for your good! Right? But what was it beneficial for?? You couldn't remember your previous reasoning. It was late, you just wanted to sleep.

Setting your alarm and propping your phone up against your burnt out lamp like an alarm clock and plugging it in, you slipped your socks off and slipped under the covers, turning around to face the wall. Staring blankly at the wall across from you, your eyelids started to droop...once..twice..and you were down for the night.

Though one thing you didn't know was, you had accidentally locked your new unofficial roommate out of his "home" by shutting your computer down while he happened to be leaving it again to explore your room more. Zapping himself to your phone he watched as your unmoving softy breathing form slept, it was therapeutic for him. After an hour of watching you sleep he started to go through your phone, trying to find out anything and everything about you that he could.

Your family, pictures...browser history, that was fairly bare odd enough. And finally he settled on your contacts, looking through all your messages was very uneventful until he got his was into your group chat with your friends. He was upset with how passive aggressively they treated you, never with a speck of kindness, though that's how some friends showed affection he didn't want to assume yet.

Going into each separate contact, that was his plan now. Just to make sure they weren't a threat to your health, first was Mark.

It was very easy for him to travel from anywhere now as long as he had a physical "link" to get to them. And his text messages were the perfect example, using them he traced his way all the way into his phone. Marks phone was certainly more packed and intriguing than yours, he was going through his gallery of photos, family...friends...food...animals..all the usual stuff, not a single thing out of the ordinary. Moving to his browsing history was an entire different question, it was like the man didn't know what incognito was, it was very unflattering and disgusted him. Quickly leaving as his history started to get weirder and weirder and it made him more and more uncomfortable he moved to his texts.

And how he was disappointed. He was hoping you had some honest genuine friends, but when he saw what they said about you in their chat of theirs he wanted to set the world aflame. He looked through which contacts were added to the group chat: Mark, Jamie, Gary, and Moose.

They talked about you in the most vile and disgusting ways, Mark not participating in a certain theme of the main topic of their chats as he had made it clear in the group chat he liked a guy named "Fry". He didn't care, he still talked about you like you were the scum of the earth, calling you a suck up etc. Because you tried to treat them kindly, he was seething with anger he could barely contain it.

He breathed in and out...in.....and out.....He wouldn't act on his rage without thought. He needed to plan and skillfully ruin their lives without leaving a trace of him behind, not just mindlessly ruin everything they owned.

He was gonna have fun with this, so far the majority of your friend group deserved this, he needed to find out about the others. Looking more through Marks messages he found another group chat, that was currently active, he popped in watching as someone typed in the chat.

.

.

Anita - Did anyone see that weird game that Y/N got? I knew they were lonely but I didn't think they would buy a dating sim 💀

Popped up on the screen, he was annoyed, another place they would talk badly? The chat wasn't directly about you but there was a good portion of the previous messages talking about you. He looked at the contacts in the group: Mark, Jamie, Clara, Anita, Fry, Claire, Gary, and Moose.

He sighed, closing his eyes and focusing on everything around him, how much code there was in the phone was overwhelming to him compared to his game. But for you? He'd run into the sun before he continue to let them hurt you.

He "logged" himself in as Mark, it was like trying to run in water. He went online to find the most phone frying virus they could, imbedding the links wouldn't be as hard so they wouldn't loom suspicious.

Going back to the group chat, he pasted all the links in there, editing them to make them look like videos. Sending them he smiled, as soon as they clicked on those links, they wouldn't be able to use their phones anymore without having a scamming ad popping up over the lock screen. This would give him time to individually go into each of their phones without them finding him.

This was going to take a while.

.

.

.

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Waking up you yawned, stretching. You hadn't had your reoccurring nightmare this time, sitting up in bed confused as if you were missing something, you realized your alarm never went off! Basically falling off your bed rushing to your bathroom to get dressed. Running down the stairs not bothering to comb your hair you pat your right pocket...nothing. Your phone was always there, you must've left it somewhere. Panicking you looked through your home in a distressed state, basically swiping everything off of your bathroom counter before remembering you never did unplug your phone this morning.

Speed walking to your room, you spotted your phone against the lamp just like you left it. Grabbing it and walking downstairs you noticed you had several notifications from a group chat, clicking on it as it was your friends texting you and you expected them to be yelling at you for not picking them up...weird.

They all texted in a very strange way, each message repetitive. All giving the same reason "Sorry I have to cancel today, family emergency" you deadpanned, seriously? They were canceling and didn't even bother to say they just didn't want you to come? That was just cruel.

Sighing you opened your front door, slipping your phone into your right pocket, you wanted to sit on your porch and get some fresh air. As soon as you opened the door you were met with the oddest thing

An apple themed gift basket and a card securely tucked in, you stepped out your door looking around to see if anyone was pranking you, not a single person was out in the street and it was quiet. The only thing that was heard was a birds call every few seconds, you sighed crouching down to see if it was at the right address, the last thing you wanted was someone's "package". And...nope it was for you, with your name and everything, well..this was weird but might as well indulge on what the stranger got you.

Locking the door behind you, you made your way to your living room, setting the basket down on the coffee table in front of you. First, you grabbed the card, which had your name on it now that you could see it better, opening it a pressed rose fell from the card onto your dark rug, okay....REALLY weird.

The card had the following

"Oh Y/n, sweet Y/n, I am sorry for what is happening and how confused you must be. But it is for your own good, they were parasites.

With love

-W.D<3"

Okay, now you were freaking out. Someone knew your name and is claiming you had parasites or something, shaking your head, maybe it was a complete misunderstanding and they thought you were sick! Either way you scored a goodie basket. How fun.

.

.

.

He had made his way to your TV in the living room, a smile creeping onto his face as he saw you got the basket he sent. He didn't know how delivery services worked, but with how much of your friends' money he spent, he'd been hoping they'd do same day delivery, and he was not disappointed! The apple designed basket, candy, and bag was all his idea, the rest of the basket being kind of a "preset". He smiled, he knew the rose was a good touch, he hoped you weren't to confused now. He just wanted the best for you after all

<3

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Yay! Third chapter :D once all this is over and I finally FINALLY Get onto the IN game plot the chapters will start to be longer, I haven't really planned most of this out </3 I only really had an idea for the game itself.

People who wanted to be tagged!

@elegantkidfansoul

Toodles!

[aerkame]

Beautiful Dreamer

Inspired from the Kingdom Keepers series, something I keep coming back to year after year. And like the Alive AU, I will make this an AU as well to keep it separate from what could be canon mainly because we don't know enough about Welcome Home and I don't want anything to conflict with what is currently in it or what will come. As you'll probably see, I kind of see Wally as the victim here in a way, and while I do think Wally is the only puppet that's "alive" in Welcome Home, I'm going to add the other puppets in this because I feel like they need to be written more in fanfiction as well.

So, I present to you the Dream AU written for this Beautiful Dreamer series, please enjoy. PS: It's totally fine to request for the Dream AU like with the Alive one, I just made it for this fic specifically though.

Chapter I

__________________________________________________________

Drops of water softly kissed your felt skin as the rain kept pouring down. It seemed so real, unlike most dreams. This was different from the rest. You felt no lingering sensations of falling, floating, or hovering when you moved, just the ground beneath your 'feet'. Perhaps you were lucid dreaming once more? You closed your eyes trying to remember.

Every night it was the same dream that kept repeating itself, but with each night you felt like someone new when you slept. The first time you experienced this you saw yourself in the shoes of another, a leather blue mail carrier hat sat on your head, and your skin felt so soft and fuzzy, it felt so real. So uncanny.

The memory of the first occurrence faded as you felt the rain stop...dreams aren't supposed to have memories. This wasn't right.

"Well gee bud, you shouldn't be out here in the rain you know. You'll become a chili-dog in no time!"

You opened your eyes to look up. It hadn't stop raining, there was a giant plush looking blue dog with an umbrella standing just above you, a fever dream then. You don't recall being able to talk or hear anyone in dreams, or see anyone else in dreams this clearly.

"Huh?"

Your hand went to your mouth in shock. You spoke, you spoke so clearly and easily, and it wasn't a voice you recognized. Fear was beginning to nip at you, creeping into your sleepy conscious. This was too livid to be a dream.

The giant dog bent down a bit now frowning. "Eddie...are you okay there buddy? You're acting awfully strange today." A soft paw grasped your hand to help you up. Eddie? That's not your name, who...it clicked. You began to panic, feeling your...You couldn't feel a heartbeat, there was no heartbeat but you could feel yourself panic. You felt nothing. You jolted up onto your feet, scattering the soaked letters you didn't know you had next to you. This isn't your body, this isn't your-

"Ahh!"

The bed sheets flew across the room as you jumped from the bed, tripped, then fell to the floor with a loud 'thud'. "mph..."

You groaned getting up lazily, limbs still asleep and legs feeling like jelly. A dream. It was just another dream you assured yourself. That felt so real though. It was so...alive. These dreams were getting pretty intense, but just as you figured out it was a dream you'd wake up. This time was a bit different though, you were in someone else's body entirely. Or at least it felt like that. Should you see a doctor and get your brain checked out for a tumor, a concussion, or something? This was normal in dreams...right, maybe you were sick?

Taking in deep and shaky breaths, you tried to calm your racing heart and stop thinking so hard on it. You took your time feeling the cool wooden floorboards reminding yourself where you were, smelled the Earthy air from the rain last night, and felt your heartbeat slow to a calm pace. It's alright, it's okay. They're just dreams.

Slowly getting up, you made the bed before bee-lining to the bathroom, ready for the day to get started already. At least it was Saturday. You would rather not go to work after something so livid like that. Maybe you could go to the park later and skate for a bit to try and clear your head. Yeah that sounded good. And some nice tea from that tea shop next to the park. You bit into the toast slowly enjoying it, feeling the crunch and the softer textures with sweet honey butter spread across it.

By the time you were out the door with rollerblades hanging off your shoulders it was noon. The weather was perfect, most of the muddy puddles had dried, and the birds were singing happily. You heard the 'click' of the lock and finally left for the park, opting to just walk there since it was nice out.

You jogged a bit through the city until you saw the treeline of the park, only resting to get your skates on. There was quite a lot of people out now that the weather was calm, kids were having birthday parties, families visiting the playground with their kids, a few barbecues here and there, today is a good day. Checking that the skates were properly fitted, you pushed off from your right side, skating slowly until you got to a smoother path on the sidewalk. Once you felt comfortable, you sped up the pace until you could really feel the burn in your thighs.

___

The room was dark, as usual. Cold, lonely, and desolate as a broken dull voice sang throughout the house. "Beautiful Dreamer, wake unto me, Starlight and dewdrops are waiting for thee..." A soft creak here and there "Sounds of the rude world heard in the day, Lull'd by the moonlight have all passed away.." A loud bang of the door sounded, followed by creaks. Two half-lidded eyes with a broken smile beneath them looked up to the only source of light through the window.

"Beautiful dreamer-" Silence "What's that?" Another creak, a squeak, and a groan. The eyes widened as the smile grew wider into a lively face, one of hope.

"Beautiful dreamer, won't you come by?" Please, we're so lonely...

Bit of a side note: While it is going to be mostly Wally x reader, this will be Everyone x reader. Not like romance, more like bordering on it but still platonic? (Not sure how to explain, but I'm sure it'll be more clear the more I write. They all just adore you really.) This chapter was shorter than I thought it'd be but it's just the first one so far! And what was Home talking about? Why you of course! Or was it about Eddie acting weird today? Wait how did Home already know of your short visit through Eddie?

[cactusnymph]

I have so many thoughts. Can you do Touching #50 for Shadowheart x Laezel?

Shadowheart has been having thoughts. She's not proud of it—in fact, one might say that she's feeling the exact opposite of proud—but since Lae'zel saved Shadowheart's life and they bickered all the way back to Last Light's Inn and then later Lae'zel stared at Shadowheart while she tranced the entire time... something is different.

Shadowheart doesn't like it.

She observes herself obsessively since it happened, the way her breath hitches whenever Lae'zel gets close, her skin gets hotter, and there's an uncomfortably familiar tingle underneath her skin. She wishes she could say it was allergies.

Being allergic to Lae'zel would simply make sense. Feeling any attraction towards her, however, doesn't make any sense whatsoever. Lae'zel should be her worst enemy. Every single word out of her mouth makes Shadowheart angry.

She doesn't understand sarcasm or simple idioms, she insults Shadowheart and calls her weak or incompetent at any given opportunity and she keeps bragging about her sexual prowess.

Who even does that all the time?

Shadowheart must admit that the unsults haven gotten less frequent since that fight in front of Halsin's portal, but Lae'zel still stares at her angrily all the damn time as if Shadowheart is the most offensive thing in Faerûn Lae'zel has ever laid her eyes upon.

It makes her so mad.

And. Well. Other things that she doesn't want to address.

Shadowheart longs for some magical memory wiping that washes away the weird feelings and the strange pull she feels since that doomed day in the Shadow Cursed Lands. She doesn't care for Lae'zel's sad puppy dog eyes after the betrayal of her Lich Queen because she sees herself in that angry confusion and desperation and Shadowheart doesn't want anything to connect her to Lae'zel.

It's enough that they both have wriggling tadpole in their brains that could project her stupid thoughts and feelings straight into Lae'zel's head if she's not careful.

Sadly this turns out to be terribly difficult while she's stuck with Lae'zel in what Shadowheart can only assume to have been a broom closet at some point when this monastery wasn't overrun by Githyanki. Lae'zel has her shoved up against a wall, her hand pressed on Shadowheart's mouth to stop her from making any sounds while they hear people outside shouting and running down the halls in search of them.

She can only hope that Gale and Tav found an equally good hiding spot when they were separated. The soft and steady dripping of blood coming out of Lae'zel's wound feels like a punch in the gut every time Shadowheart hears it. She can barely moves her hands and she needs to add a verbal component to her healing magic or otherwise the spell will simply fizzle and die uselessly.

She tries to wriggle out of Lae'zel's grip, tries pulling her hand off of her mouth but Lae'zel's grip is iron tight.

This really shouldn't turn her on. It shouldn't.

Gods, why must she be so fucked up.

A pair of huge golden eyes turn to look at her in the darkness and very slowly Lae'zel pulls her hand away from Shadowheart's mouth. There's a beat of silence as they stare at each other before Shadowheart puts both of her hands on Lae'zel's bleeding wound and closes it with a spell.

Lae'zel makes a sound at the back of her throat that doesn't sound exactly pained and Shadowheart does her best to smirk triumphantly, even though her heart feels as though it's trying to jump out of her chest and her palms are sweaty.

Lae'zel straight up hisses at her.

Which really shouldn't do it for Shadowheart either.

Fuck.

Maybe she's losing her mind, maybe her sanity is abandoning her after she deserted the Dark Lady. This could be her divine punishment for going against her goddess' wishes, for betraying everything she ever believed in.

Shadowheart knows that Lae'zel wants to do nothing more than to say something insulting to Shadowheart right now, but she has to be quiet so they won't get murdered by her people. They're both the same now—hunted by those they swore their allegiance to. A former cleric of Shar and a renegade Githyanki warrior.

Heavy footsteps outside make every muscle in her body tense and Lae'zel's leg trapped between Shadowheart's thighs does nothing to alleviate any of the tension she's feeling right now. She can't move. She mustn't move.

Shadowheart's eyes widen in horror when Lae'zel takes a deep breath, clearly sniffing the air before her piercing eyes find Shadowheart's again and then all of a sudden a pair of very insistent lips press against Shadowheart's mouth and she makes a sound like a dying kobold.

Lae'zel is an aggressive kisser, much like she's aggressive about everything. Shadowheart does not expect a quite long, forked tongue to find its way into her mouth and her knees go a little weak thinking about what that tongue could do to other places. She grabs Lae'zel's hair both both hands, fisting it tightly and pulling on it as she kisses back, biting at Lae'zel's bottom lip as her hips snaps forward so her crotch rubs against Lae'zel's thigh.

When Shadowheart pulls on Lae'zel's hair she makes a sound that shoots straight down between Shadowheart's legs so she does it again and again, pressing closer and biting harder and trying not to give Lae'zel an inch. Even this kiss is like a fight.

That is, until the door gets opened and Tav pokes their head in.

"Well. Took you long enough", they say with a deep sigh. Lae'zel detaches herself from Shadowheart and mumbles something in Gith that Shadowheart can't understand. Her cheeks are flaming hot and her underwear is soaked and gods, she needs a bath and good, long trance. Maybe some time alone in her tent.

She' absolutely never going to speak about this ever again.

feel free to send me more of these <3

[freddiemercurylegendabovelegends]

Today, on 19th January, 1978

Group Interviews - Circus Magazine

Queen Deserve Rock's Royal Crown?

by Rosy Horide

Freddie Mercury and Brian May Hawk their 'News Of The World'

Freddie Mercury is no longer the leader of Queen. Has he been fired, you ask, or is he off to pursue a solo career? No it's simply, with the advent of News Of The World LP (Asylum) the personality of the music and of Brian May, drummer Roger Taylor and bassist John Deacon have come across more strongly than ever before.

Those who have seen them on the recent US tour notice more than ever before that they're a group comprised of four separate identities, not just a lead singer and background band. Freddie Mercury is delighted to hear it.

'I've never considered myself the leader anyway,' says irrepressible Freddie. 'The most important person, perhaps.' And guitarist May agrees.

'Our separate identities do come to the fore on this album, on which every cut is completely different from the one before it and there's no concept at all. Apart from each having contributed two tracks to the album, Roger and John have been much more involved in the playing. Roger plays rhythm guitar on some of his cuts ('Sheer Heart Attack' and 'Fight From The Inside') which makes sense, because he had a better idea of how he wanted it to go. John plays acoustic guitar on one of his as well ('Who Needs You'). I played maracas on it. While we may not do it that way on stage, in the studio that makes more sense.'

Brian also does a lot more singing of his own songs on News, but he's content to let Freddie do the singing on stage.

'He's a natural performer,' asserts Brian. 'He acts on stage as if he was born doing it. That's great for us. We wouldn't want it any other way.'

As May and Mercury emphasize, it's not just musically that shifts occur in the group.

'John keeps a very close eye on our business affairs,' says Freddie. 'He knows everything that's going on and shouldn't be going on. If God forsakes us now the rest of the group won't do anything unless John says it's all right.

'Roger is very important to us in a different way. He's always been an out-and-out rock & roll fan with no time to stop and think about music and that's very good for us. Instinct. He's also the one who is most aware of facets in music, and that's essential in the band. If you listen to 'Sheer Heart Attack' on the new album you'll see what we mean. It sounds like a punk, or 'new wave' song, but it was written at the same time of the Sheer Heart Attack LP. He played it to us then but it wasn't quite finished and he didn't have time to complete it before we started recording. That was three years ago and now. . .almost all these records you hear are like that period.' And Roger now? 'He was into punk for a long time, but he's tired of it.' More about the album later.

But if you still don't believe no crown of leadership rests on the mercurial head of Freddie, it's worth repeating his comment about the composition of the group.

'If anyone left Queen, anyone of the four, that would be the end of Queen. We are four equal, interwoven parts. And the others just couldn't function the same without each quarter.'

Queen have just finished a special tour of the states. Not the longest they've ever undertaken, by any means, but special nevertheless.

'It was the first tour we've ever done without the support band,' Freddie explained. 'There was so much going on on stage that I doubt there would have been room for another band anyway. We have so much material we want to play for people now that it would have been far too long a concert. It's hard enough anyway to know what to leave out: we'd like to play all the new material, but there are some things we just would not dare leave out or I think the fans would lynch us.'

It was the sort of tour most rock bands dream of doing. Brian agrees: 'We've managed to get some of the most sought after halls there are, even though the tour was short. Most of them are places we've played before. In some cities we had to settle for second, alternative choice auditoriums - the thing was set up so fast. It was also a very compressed tour - 35 dates in six weeks. We did very large halls because we wanted to do a fuller show and our rig was about twice as big as ever we used before.

'It provided a complete stage environment, with an extension stage, three trailers and enormous lighting gimmick not just for New York and Los Angeles. That's why we booked big halls, so that we could give everybody the complete show. We first used our crown centerpiece at London's Earl's Court concert over the Jubilee. At the time, we didn't envisage being able to take the crown on tour with us, but we managed to have it demounted into a portable object. And so we had it for all the gigs. It made the most ambitious backdrop we've ever attempted, but it was worth it. The fans seemed to enjoy it and they are what matter.'

That last remark of Brian's is typical of the group's attitude towards their fans, for they have one of the closest rapports with the fans of any in the business. The same cannot be said for their relationship to the music press, however, especially in Britain. In fact, many people thought the chart-popping single 'We Are The Champions,' was Queen's way of telling the press in no uncertain terms that they've made it without them. Others thought it an arrogant statement about their rock supremacy. But how do they feel? First Freddie, who wrote the song:

'Certainly it's a relationship that could be, but I was thinking about football when I wrote it. I wanted a participation song, something that the fans could latch on to. It was aimed at the masses; I thought we'd see how they took it. It worked a treat. When we performed it at a private concert in London, the fans actually broke into a football chant between numbers. Of course, I've given it more theatrical subtlety than an ordinary football chant. You know me.

'I certainly wasn't thinking about the press when I wrote it. I never think about the British music press these days. It was really meant to be offered the musicians the same as the fans.

'I suppose it could also be construed as my version of 'I Did It My Way.' We have made it, and it certainly wasn't easy. No bed of roses as the song says. And it's still not easy.'

Brian concurs, 'You know, songs aren't always about what the words say. Messages in songs can appear different. I always see that as the difference between prose and poetry. Prose can mean exactly what it says, while poetry can mean the opposite. That goes for this song. Freddie's stuff is often tongue-in-cheek anyway, as you know. This song is very theatrical. Freddie is very close to his art. You could say, he's married to his music, whether it's 'I Did It My Way' or his 'There's No Business Like Show Business.' I must say, when he first played it for us in the studio we all fell on the floor with laughter. So many people in the press hate us because we've side-stepped them and got where we have without them.

'But there's no way the song says anything against our audiences. When the song says 'we,' it means 'us and the fans.' When we did that special concert, the fans were wonderful. They understood it so well. I know it sounds corny, but it brought tears to our eyes.'

Freddie and Brian are unanimous on that: the spontaneous responses to 'We Are The Champions' really move them. But that is the kind of general response News Of The World has received because, as Brian may says, 'It's a spontaneous album. I think we've managed to cut through to the spontaneity lacking in our other albums. I have no apologies to make for any of our previous albums. We're proud of them and wouldn't have let them out if we weren't. But I now feel some may have been over-produced, so we wanted to go with a more spontaneous rock & roll based album. It was nice to do something that didn't need such intensity. For example, with 'Sleeping On The Sidewalk' we did it in one take because it just seemed right the first time. We like to think of the album as a window on an unguarded moment, not a set piece. Each cut seems to do that, from the participation songs to Freddie's mood pieces. Even his numbers on the album are different, from his heavy 'Get Down, Make Love' to 'My Melancholy Blues,' which is just what it says.'

Brian admits that his own material is different too. But he still tries to keep his private life separate and out of his songs as much as possible.

'If you don't keep something back, it can be very bad for you.'

But for the band both the album and the tour are in the past and they have to look at the future. They got back to England on Christmas Eve.

'My mother would have killed me if I wasn't home for Christmas. I haven't missed one yet,' says Freddie. And the others felt the same.

It's time for some stock-taking. We've all become businessmen,' admits Freddie, 'even though it's against our better judgment. It's something that always happens if you get successful. Being a musician is not just cutting discs, unfortunately. I wish it was. We've all got companies now, some connected to music, others not. I'm producing Peter Straker, I have my car company. . . and lots of other fingers in other pies. We must take some time off to get things in perspective, or things will start to go wrong.

'Then there's been talk of doing a big world tour - Britain, South America, Japan, and of course the States as well as lots of other places. But that won't be until later in the year.'

So, American fans will have a chance to see Queen in 1978.

'You must tell them not to be too greedy, thought,' warns Freddie. They've already seen more of us than any other country.'

And what about a message for the American fans, Freddie?

'They know we love them. Apart from that, oh, say something outrageous for me.'

[redysetdare]

I hate those posts like "this is about aromanticism, don't tag as ace or aroace!" as if aroaces aren't aro enough because of our asexuality, and non-SAM aces relating to aros is somehow a bad thing. Also some of the aroallo accounts are so quick to regurgitate ace discourse talking points because they think aces are erasing and oppressing aros, I hate that so much

Yeah, to an extent I can completely understand where people are coming from when asking this. I have similar issues with people tagging autism posts as ADHD because they show up in my feed because of the ADHD tag even though the post only mentions Autism. It can be frustrating to be looking for posts and get something completely different. But on the other hand...it feels like some people are taking the idea of these tags way too seriously. Tagging is a minimal issue in the grand scheme of things. Tagging does not actually derail a post as much as people act like it does. Tagging a post you reblogged does not make that post show up in the main tags. I understand that AroAllos do not want to have their personal experiences conflated as Asexuality because it can feel like erasure when you write a personal experience about you identity only to have it tagged as something that is not you identity. But also I don't think people realize how much overlap a lot of aromantic and asexual experiences have. Acting like they are so incredibly different and can't have any overlap is willful ignorance at best and malicious separatism at worse. And it's incredibly disheartening as an AroAce to see how many Aro people seem to have gotten comfortable and even feel justified in the low-key bigoted things they've said against aces and aroaces.

Some of the absolutely wild takes I've seen can range from "AroAces shouldn't post in the aromantic tag" to "Don't tag your post as aromantic if it doesn't mention aromanticism [aka doesn't mention an experience in which the viewer deems as an aromantic experience]" to literal straight up acephobia or aroacephobia and it's absolutely wild because as someone who exists in both tags I've seen this happening basically solely in aromantic tags.

It's genuinely wild to me how we even got to this point in the aspec community where people are arguing over tagging to the point of trying to exclude certain aros from the aro tag completely because they feel less seen as compared to others and act like it's the fault of those other aspecs that they are being oppressed.

I was someone who was around when the Aro and Ace communities were mostly a united force. Because when the entire world was against us we at least had each others back. half the problems people mentioned when it came to the reason to split the community so drastically were not problems I ever actually saw. Hell they still aren't problems I see. I'm not saying that it doesn't happen but I personally have not seen anyone assuming or saying that if you're aro you must also be ace, which makes me thing it's not actually as big of an issue as people seem to think it is. the aro and ace communities being united didn't mean that aromantic was a subsection of asexual, though I believe it'd be lying to ignore the split attractions model in the creation of the aromantic identity and how both the Aro and Ace identities as we know them today kind of emerged from that model.

As I said not too long ago: the separation of the aro and ace communities has done more harm than it's done help. We are making it easier for people to target us by splitting up the way we have. By making enemies out of fellow aspec people you give aphobes the space and comfort they need to start pushing us out again.

We are literally in the same boat. if that makes you upset then you can get on your own raft but you can't then demand everyone else get on their own rafts too or try to sink the ship that everyone else is on.

the tag discourse is stupid. there are more pressing issues to be upset about rather than tumblrs shit tagging system. This helps no one. If aroaces posting in the GENERAL AROMANTIC TAG upsets you THAT MUCH then you can literally go into the aroallo tag to find the content you want to see or better yet MAKE THE CONTENT YOU WANT TO SEE. If an asexual tagging a post they relate too with ace bugs you that much then fucking block them. it's not erasure when someone of a different sexuality feels represented by your post. If an aroace tagging a post as aromantic when you feel it is only about asexuality makes you that mad then you can literally block them. You cannot decide how someone should tag their posts because you personally do not know their experience. Grow the fuck up.

I'm rose repulsed. there are barely any spaces and posts about rose repulsed people in the main aspec tags. You want to know what I did? I made my own fucking space. i went to the romance and sex repulsed tags and posted there. I made posts about being repulsed. I have a fucking blog and a discord server centered around repulsed people. Yes it sucks when other people don't make content you like but that's when you have to accept you need to make it your damn self and not throw a fit over tags on tumblr dot com.

apologies for a long rant, If this ask was bait then congrats you got a rant out of me but also I think if people really want to block me over this instead of having a conversation like adults then so be it. Those who think this sort of exclusion is justified and correct are not people i want to be interacting with in the community. they are not people I want following me. I support AroAllos. I support all aromantic people. I understand where they are coming from in their pain. I do agree that they deserve more recognition because they often moralized to be morally bad for their existence and as a repulsed person NO IDENTITY should be viewed as inherently bad. I have no ill will towards AroAllos making posts about ther experience, they deserve to have their experience shared. But the way some people have been acting in the aromantic community is not acceptable and should be called out because at this rate some people are really toeing the line of the ace discourse that happened in like 2016 and as someone who went through that I REALLY don't want to see it repeat itself.

[oldnewhaven]

Types of Food each corporation would distribute– A post I started writing at 1:23AM yesterday while Hungry, Part 1 [?].

DAHL

- Dahl is all about Militaristic Seriousness to comical degrees, so it shouldn't surprise you that most of what they have to offer is Rations. Canned food, nutrition packets and weird astronaut looking pastes, all packaged up in neat browns and greens to match with the very boring aesthetic of the Rest of their products. Everything is neatly separated and easily accessible in Dahl settlements. One bonus of it is that it never expires, so if you're hungry and need a snack, just find an old military base and that should have you pretty much covered for a few weeks.

- "But Magnus, what's in the packs?" I hear you ask, and not to worry my situational friend, I've done Way Too Much research on this and can absolutely tell you ! Again, its all very shelf stable and nutritional, so it ranges from cereal bars, dried up meats and nuts, protein powders and pastes (usually peanut butter), some mildly flavoured crackers, a variety of canned foods (including but not limited to: "Spaghetti", """beans""", soups and veggies. These are meant to be complimentary, not really eaten on their own), and ready-made "pop it in a fire for a few seconds" sustenance providers like curries. It's good enough to eat ! Hopefully.

- ...It does Not. Taste like the best thing in the world usually. If you're desperate enough you won't notice it at first, but these things are meant for soldiers who haven't dreamed of a non-dehydrated vegetable in 10 years, so it's tough to swallow once you're not suffering from all the malnutrition ailments. It's very barely seasoned to account for the vast majority, and it's probably not a good investment to waste spices on any of it either. You could still reasonably throw a meal together with the pastes plus the canned stuff and (if you get lucky) have a chocolate cake for dessert though, even if it does taste like a biting an old boot.

TEDIORE

- Tediore is, by all lore definitions, a 'budgetarian' company. They appeal HARD to the aesthetic of the common person, and that their main demographic are consumers who are just looking for something quick and reliable, knowing people will more often than not only use it because they have no other choice, so it shouldn't surprise you that their business model for selling food is basically the same as Walmart's. In my mind they mostly sell quick snack food you'd usually see in a convenience store– Likely not the best choice as far as nutritional value goes, but it's tasty, affordable and it hits the spot when you're in a pinch or when you're starving after a long day of Torment Nexus'ing around the six galaxies. so you really can't afford to be picky most of the time. Sometimes Pretty Literally.

- The food itself is, again, just about everything you'd find in a convenience store in the middle of nowhere after a long roadtrip and are so hungry you can't see straight: Isles upon isles of chips, cereals and cookies, pre-made lunchable type meals in refrigerated containers, soda that is Technically brand name, but is still so obscure you have to look up if its even real later. It's the perfect combination of accessible, cheap and edible enough to grab the attention of people. The packaging in general tends to vary between shades of gray plus some extra shines to be recognized as food and not bagged motor oil, plus varied mascots to differ each product from one another as though they're from separate entities and not just Tediore All Over Again.

- How does it taste though ? Well, the answer is that it's good, even though it probably Will give you either a headache or a stomachache later. Like all hyperprocessed food, Tediore knows that the secret to making stuff taste good is to just either put a Lot of Salt or a Lot of Sugar in it, and that's really the whole secret. Let's say you get a nice Cheese Flavour snack bag from the local bodega: You eat 5 chips and think "Oh, that's really good!", completely oblivious to the fact you will regret this decision, and eventually eat the whole bag. Hard cut to you on the couch sluggish and weird, unsure to what caused it, but it was 100% the amount of sodium you consumed just being so high your body thinks you're sick. Or something like that. I'm not speaking from experience here.

MALIWAN

- Now, let's get this out of the way: Maliwan is as much a corporation as it is a cult. Its corporate identity as "hip" and cool and sleek and transhumanist and beautiful is all a facade for what they're really trying to sell you, which is an insecurity they can profit off of. They approach people who are already very lost, exhausted and burdened by the world and promise them a place to belong, to become something More, and if they need to manufacture your burdens, they will. All of this is to say, they're social media influencers creating problems you didn't know existed so they can sell you More Things, so obviously they're the "organic"/diet product food sellers of this world. They're like if an MLM had WAY too much credibility and power and people just had to live with it.

- You know the kinds of products I'm talking about. It's stuff that comes bragging about how it's "from the farm to your door!" even though it has gone through the same industrialization as everything else that is mass produced and meant to be sold. It's your diet versions of products, yogurts and teas and protein milks and "healthy" snacks, despite the fact they're the same composition-wide and just marked Way Up. They'd probably sell a lot of very niche products too though, all with the same promises for health benefits and what have you, but that at least have the decency to be interesting or *a little* flavorful. For one I think Maliwan branded gum would be really good, and they'd probably make some really good flavour blocks for putting in soup and stuff. That's their forté to me.

- Most of the food just tastes really bland and has kind of a chemical aftertaste, and the textures tend to vary between "Really airy and light, kind of like a foam or shaving cream" to "Unbearable combination of crunchy and soft that makes you confused on what you're even supposed to be tasting". It's a very high chance to be hit or miss depending on what you try, and since it's so expensive it's usually not worth it unless you're using these products for really specific dietary goals.

HYPERION

- Hyperion to me is complicated to say on what they'd offer as far as food goes. On the cafeteria area in TPS you only really see fast food, so I imagine that the conglomerate would own most of a food court in your average shopping mall. All the name brands are owned by Hyperion and your variety is manufactured to look like you're spoiled for all the choices when, really, you're just going to give them money either way. The food is all pretty consistently good, even though the sourcing for it is questionable and it's always plated the same everytime, which makes you think all the ingredients just go through moulds before they plop it into your plate, and it's probably the closest thing it'll get to something like homemade food from the corporations.

- Again, variety is their main selling point, so as far as food goes, you'll find a little bit of everything. Pizza, hamburgers, hotdogs, food that's been genetically modified or has poison in it, tacos– really, the world is your oyster ! They probably have that on the menu too if you look ! Its all about the flashiness and the exclusivety and the way its presented and sold that really gets peoples gears turning. They're not bound just by ONE thing, they have ALL the things you could possibly ask for right here !

- ...But does it taste good ? Ehhh, that's more of a complicated issue. Again, because of all the variety and the way everything is synthesized and made based on the standards for the company, it'll always just taste Good (as in, You bite into it and say "Yeah, that's pretty good"), and after a while of eating Just Good food, you'll already have built a tolerance to it and it'll just taste mid after a while... and that is when they start advertising to you Bigger and Better foods, stuff that's been made in a lab to taste as good to human beings as possible, something so unbelievable your tastebuds might explode ! And then they do. Because it was an experiment and they were using you as a guinea pig. But hey, all in the name of progress, right ?

[polinbridgertonsocute]

Here's my thoughts on the whole Lady Whistledown thing and a sprinkling of what I assume from the new season 3 part 2 trailer. Read mores annoy me, so scrapped that plan.

Penelope can still have independence. But doesn't have to snap at him for it. Colin only wants her safety and wants to help in order to achieve that. She can still have power without writing slander and spreading secrets that will remain permanent.

Penelope can shift into being a different type of writer and still have people read it.

Colin loving and dedicating his dream and purpose to loving Penelope is perfectly fine. He shouldn't be shamed for going through life as he has been (jobless and free). Nor should he feel shame for being rich only. Eloise had enough shame for all, even though she is still all about that life after complaining.

Plus marriage is a two-way bond, so there should be a modicum if togetherness and no separation. This is a lifetime commitment for Colin and Penelope so she shouldn't need to fight so hard to have a lot of independence since they are a love match. Plus, Colin would support her writing anyways.

Penelope has already suffered for her LW writing mistakes. She shouldn't have to deal with more bad consequences. Penelope should be allowed to stop writing or writing still with Colin's support) and that's it. There should be no consequences for Colin's feelings (mainly love and protectiveness and worry) either.

Colin wanting to keep Penelope safe is a good thing. She has put herself in danger with almost every article.

Wanting to spare her the possible blowback is natural, for Colin. Public scandal is nothing compared to making an enemy of the crown (Queen Charlotte).

These next two opinions conflict with each other. Penelope should not tell Colin. BUT if she feels she simply MUST speak, then she should tell him privately.

Option 1: Penelope shouldn't tell Colin about her writing as LW, but quietly give it up. Colin and Penelope don't need internal conflict. There is already peer pressure, society rules, the ton's assumptions, and both their own self-doubts getting in their heads. Penelope and Colin don't need this added weight of LW writings between them. They don't need to weather any storms in order to be strong. They are already. Their bond has always been there since they Were younger.

Option 2: If Penelope is allowing LW writings to weigh on her moral compass conscience, then she should tell Colin. But privately. Not so she can try and stop a scene or scandal, but because she cares for Colin's feelings.

And why is Penelope having such a hard time letting go at all? She did it for the off-seasons for months. She wasn't wallowing in despair, it didn't stop her from doing other things. So why not give it up for good, now?

Penelope was worth something before her LW persona, she'll be worth something if she gives it up afterwards or continue. Penelope is not seperate from her anonomys authorship. It's just another side of her. She is the same person.

Penelope exists. She already is enough (especially to Colin).

And why did Charlotte suddenly stop with the whole 3 days thing? She subtly threatened LE when talking to Eloise in season 2.

There was other ways of making herself known than putting other people down. Penelope instead could have talked to Colin how she wants to write and he would have helped her.

I hope Eloise won't end up spouting the secret at the engagement party, since it'll ruin it. But still, Eloise standing up for Colin is good (finally, for once not putting him down).

And another thing is Penelope writing the Lady Whistledown sheets makes her worried and unhappy when Colin tells his family news about their engagement. Another reason why I hope LW writings fade away. The printed sheets are not good for anyone, even though there is some money and lots of sales.

If Penelope and Colin want to be Lady and Lord Whistledown, then I hope they let Queen Charlotte in on it (not writing, just identities so she doesn't order them killed).

[bylertruther]

do you think mike had any realizations about his feelings in s2? like during the shed scene or the snowball? you mentioned in a post his "oh" moment at the end of s3 so i was curious if you think he realized anything before then!

i don't think so, no. he clearly loved will more than words could say, and in a way that separated him from will's other friends, but i don't think he had any idea of what was to come. he was just a boy loving as freely and fiercely as he possibly could before the world told him he shouldn't, and trying his very best to stop the past from repeating itself.

he didn't want to lose his best friend, and with no super hero around to help them this time, he felt he had to take matters into his own hands. will was kidnapped on his way home from his house, and he heard just how scared will was when he was all alone in the upside down, trying his best to stay alive while being hunted by a monster. there's no way he was going to let will go through that alone again—just absolutely no way at all. he couldn't help the first time, but he could help the second time. that's why he was by his side from start to finish. that's why he didn't stop until will was really and truly safe.

i think that the love mike and will share is one that just... is beyond words. there is no beginning or end—it simply is. they've known each other for what is practically their entire lives; they have a mutual understanding that doesn't need to be verbalized to be received; they fit in such a complementary way that to be without each other knocks their world askew.

like. they have just always been different. they've always been mike and will. will has always looked to mike and confided in him, and mike has always treated will way differently than everyone else, including el. the love has always been there, whether they knew what it was or they didn't. that's why will still thinks it'll be them together forever even though mike is dating el and has totally tossed him to the side in favor of her, and why mike even brings that up in the first place. some friendships are so intense that they exist in this indeterminate state that encompasses many dynamics all at once—theirs is certainly one of them.

i feel that that's further supported with how their behavior towards each other is so consistent. that's why it's so hard to pick a specific moment where things changed, because really... not much has. not when you look at the core dynamic and how their souls fit. it's just always been this way.

and that familiarity is exactly what can make it so easy to miss. the tagline for st3 was "one summer can change everything," and it did! we know from hopper's letter that things most certainly did change! and that scared him! it woke him up! he wanted to turn back the clock and go back to how things were! but he can't. and then.... well, things go to shit, which makes it seem like he didn't realize anything at all, but i think he did.

so, no. i don't think mike knew at that point, but, unlike many, i don't think that takes anything away from their relationship at all. mike's love was true when he said that asking will to be his friend was the best thing he's ever done, when he promised will they wouldn't let the shadow monster spy back, and when he promised they'd go crazy together. mike is a wonderful friend with a beautiful heart. it's tempting to color those scenes as purely romantic, but i don't think mike meant them that way. he just loved and cared for his friend very much and wasn't yet afraid to let him know that or just how much.