#and when she was at a meeting discussing my needs she relayed that story and said i thought 'rape'

[autisticmight]

i mean it's all because of WHY i'm in the woods in the first place. if i'm walking poppy in the woods then i'd rather run into a man than a bear. maybe the man is also walking a dog. a man taking a walk in the local woods is not something to be afraid of

HOWEVER. if i am magically portalled into a dark forest with no reason or explanation i would rather there be a bear than a man because i have just been deposited in a horror story and human depravity is far different from bear depravity

[awearywritersworld]

the day of my execution

sukuna x reader summary: gojo, yuuji, and sukuna discuss what happened at the store. sukuna begins to consider your mortality like never before and takes care of you when you're sick. w/c: 2.7k tags/warnings: fluff. mentions of attempted kidnapping. banter. reader has the flu. aged up!yuuji. not canon compliant. fem!reader. no use of y/n. a/n: sorry for disappearing for so long, but here is the long awaited next chapter. i've put a second a/n at the end, so i hope you'll read it. please excuse me talking out of my ass trying to rationalize my application of jujutsu, but if gege does it, so can i. i hope it kind of makes sense though. series masterlist // masterlist

truthfully, yuuji expects his wednesday morning to be as uneventful as any other, but when he stands in front of the bathroom sink to brush his teeth, his eyes are not the only ones staring back at him.

"what d'ya want?" he groans. "it's too early for this."

"we need to talk."

sukuna doesn't give his vessel a chance to respond before he begins recounting the events of the previous night, a story which has yuuji's face cycling between surprise, worry, and dismay. "the man claimed someone sent him?"

"that's what i said," sukuna responds impatiently.

"why would anyone be after her? i don't understand."

"would it kill you to use your brain for once?" sukuna questions, having had the entirety of the night to ponder the situation. "think, idiot. who would be interested in using her in some ploy? against you. against... us."

yuuji's eyes widen. "the higher ups?

"no one else would be so brazen."

it strikes sukuna as ironic that just days after he relayed the cruelness he endured at the hands of jujutsu society's higher ups a millenia ago, you too almost became one of their victims. it's a reality that he despises.

"i should call gojo—"

"that is out of the question."

"do you want to keep her safe or not?"

sukuna scoffs. "this is how we keep her safe. if the higher ups are after her, we can't trust other sorcerers."

yuuji almost seems offended on gojo's behalf. after all, he's known him for the better part of a decade. "i'd trust gojo with my life."

"well this isn't your life we're talking about. this is much more important."

yuuji chuckles. "i know. that's exactly why we need help."

before sukuna can protest, yuuji's dialing his old sensei and asking to meet somewhere they can speak privately.

that's how they end up at a small bakery on the outskirts of tokyo, sukuna relaying the story for the second time that morning.

once he finishes, gojo leans back in his chair and folds his hands behind his head. "well, i don't think you're wrong about the higher ups being involved."

"so what are we supposed to do?" yuuji asks. "they might use her to get to me, but you don't think the higher ups would actually put her life in danger, do you?"

though yuuji's question is directed toward gojo, it isn't him that answers.

"you're as naive as ever," sukuna scoffs. "they'll stop at nothing to achieve their own ends."

gojo grimaces, a silent agreement with the assertion. "i can do some poking around, see who ordered it to be done."

"and what exactly is that going to do? there's no reasoning with them."

"a fact i am well aware of," the white haired man narrows his eyes at the king of curses. "but there is leverage in power, something i happen to have more of than anybody—"

"almost anybody—"

"so as the strongest, i'll take care of this as soon as i can."

"hey, um, so as productive as all the dick measuring is," yuuji interrupts. "it doesn't keep her safe in the meantime."

"i have an idea in that regard," sukuna says. "it's an ancient practice, and while it doesn't offer any protective measures, it will allow me to find her if they make another attempt like last night."

gojo leans forward, clearly interested to hear more.

"i can imbue a talisman with a part of myself and if she wears it, it will act as a beacon for her location."

"with part of yourself? as in, your cursed energy?" yuuji speculates. "wouldn't that do more harm than good? attract cursed spirits and whatever?"

"no, i'm not a fool. it's not cursed energy."

sukuna is hesitant to clarify further. he'd done something similar when creating his fingers, but it was different then. it was a selfish endeavor to preserve his life long after it was his time to die. it was a dark sort of jujutsu, one meant only to bring destruction.

but intention is important in sorcery. it can change the very essence of the practice.

for the first time in his life, sukuna is acting selflessly, concerned only with your protection. it's a pure sort of jujutsu this time around, one that allows him to impart a piece of himself that isn't tainted by cursed energy.

and because of that, that part of him would be unprotected. it'd leave him uniquely vulnerable. it's a steep and dangerous measure. that's why the practice had been forgotten long before the modern age.

"then what could it possibly be?" it's quiet for a moment as yuuji's question hangs in the air.

"it's your soul, isn't it?" the disbelief lacing gojo's voice is quite plain, but he's heard whispers of such techniques. "you'd give her a piece of your soul."

sukuna's never been one for unfinished business, so it's no surprise when he finds himself on the couch, intent on finishing the stranger. besides, it had become clear he'd been focusing on the wrong aspects of the book when he first began reading it.

he's three chapters from the end when he hears a loud shatter from the kitchen, followed by a sharp gasp. the broken glass hasn't even finished sliding across the floor before he's at your side.

"what happened?" the alarm in his voice doesn't go unnoticed by you.

"nothing, nothing," you assure him. "i just dropped my cup."

crouching down, you reach for one of the bigger pieces before your hand is swiftly smacked away. "don't."

"it's fine. it's only a little glass."

when you reach for it again, he grabs your wrist. "you troublesome little thing. do you ever listen?"

"i don't make a habit of it."

"i know. the question was rhetorical."

sukuna's already noticed the shards of glass surrounding your bare feet, so he wastes no time in picking you up and placing you on the countertop.

"don't move." he says it in such a way that, for once, you don't even think about disobeying him.

he all but stomps out of the room, returning moments later with a broom and dust pan. there's a small smile playing on your lips as you watch him gather the larger pieces before sweeping up the rest.

and you know, it's really not fair. sukuna could even call it a cosmic injustice, the way he has to worry about broken glass and fragile fingertips.

but he likes you and he likes the pads of your fingers, particularly the way they feel against his skin and run through his hair, so he swallows his pride.

it's been consuming him lately— the fact that you are just as easily broken as the glass that littered the kitchen tile. he never considered just how many ways there are for a human to die until you were nearly taken from him.

so once he's done, he rests the broom and dustpan against the wall and stands in front of you, his hips situated between your knees.

reaching into his pocket, he pulls out a necklace and your mouth falls open in shock. a delicate chain is threaded around his fingers, while its ruby pendant dangles in the air. "i want you to have this."

"what.. what is it?"

he snorts. "you don't know what a necklace is?"

you let out a breath of a laugh. "of course i do. i'm just surprised."

you hold up your palm and he places the necklace there gently. inspecting the gem, you notice it bears a striking resemblance to the color of his eyes.

strangely, it's almost as if it's heavier than it should be— like it's weighed down by some importance beyond your comprehension.

"it's beautiful," you tell him honestly. "are you sure?"

"sure of what?"

"that i should have it."

he pauses before responding, taking in the way you're so gingerly holding it. he's scared you've realized what he's actually giving you. that you're repulsed by it.

he's hesitant when he asks, "why would you think otherwise?"

"i didn't do anything to deserve something like this."

sukuna breathes a sigh of relief. "you are ever the fool."

his hands find your hips, pulling you off the counter and onto your feet. he plucks the necklace from your hand, then shifts to stand behind you.

moving your hair to the side, his fingers brush lightly against your skin. "the necklace is undeserving of adorning your neck. not the other way around."

and he knows it's the truth. a piece of him, attached to a creature so lovely she should be out of his reach... well, that's just unseemly, isn't it?

"but promise me something anyway."

"anything," you say without delay.

he situates the chain around your neck, the pendant lying in the space where your collarbones meet, and fastens the clasp. when you turn to face him, you're met with an alarmingly grave expression.

"promise you won't ever take it off."

you fiddle with the ruby somewhat nervously, feeling as if you're missing some important piece of the puzzle.

you nod in response to his request, but it isn't enough for him.

"say it."

"i promise."

he can see that you're biting back questions, so he explains, "if you're wearing that, i'll always know where to find you."

it finally dawns on you, for the first time, how much the incident at the store truly affected him. it's not the way he ended those men that clued you in, nor is it the way he pleaded with you to forgive him.

it happens in this moment. it's the gentleness of his voice, despite his underlying desperation. it's the way he's watching you carefully, as if you're likely to disappear. it's the fact he wouldn't let you clean up a mess of your own making, because he can't stand the thought of seeing you bleed.

"i... i don't know what to say."

"well, that's a first."

"shut up," you punch his shoulder. "you're ruining the moment."

"right, my bad," he chuckles and glances down at the gemstone. "do you like it?"

you let out a breath. "of course. i love it."

he smiles at your words— soft and genuine— truly a rare sight. "good."

you notice that he's looking at you. really looking at you. his eyes shift away from yours and over to each of your temples. then down to your nose. your mouth. even your chin.

he takes in every detail and he feels like he's in your debt simply for gazing at your countenance.

you almost regret it when your hands curl around the collar of his shirt and pull his lips to yours. you should have savored his smile, spent time committing it to memory.

although, that's soon forgotten as you feel the curve of his mouth deepen while his lips move against yours.

it isn't until day three of your ceaseless coughing and sneezing that sukuna adds them to his list— broken glass, fragile fingertips, coughs, and sniffles.

his concern is clear from the way he dotes on you. he brings you cold cloths, makes you tea, massages your neck, runs you baths.

now he's on his way to a twenty four hour pharmacy to pick up more medicine to reduce your fever, and while it's only a block away, he's still doing it alone.

but not even for a moment does he consider running off to burn the world's largest city to the ground. the streets are crawling with people, but he finds himself avoiding them more than anything.

he has to get back to you after all.

the only thought on his mind other than you is the ending of the stranger. the main character, while awaiting his beheading from his prison cell, conveys his final words to readers:

for the first time, in that night alive with signs and stars, i opened myself to the gentle indifference of the world. finding it so much like myself— so like a brother, really— i felt that i had been happy and that i was happy again. for everything to be consummated, for me to feel less alone, i had only to wish that there be a large crowd of spectators on the day of my execution and that they greet me with cries of hate.

in sukuna's first life, perhaps this line would have resonated with him. it was a life where he had resolved himself to the idea that nothing really mattered, because the alternative was too painful. it didn't matter that jujutsu society betrayed him. it didn't matter that he stole people's lives out from under them. it didn't matter that he was alone.

and while he would have never surrendered himself to execution, if that had been his fate, he would have preferred to go out surrounded by living reminders of all he had accomplished. surrounded by all the people he had ruined.

however, when he imagines such an occurrence happening in his present life, there is only one face throughout the entire crowd and it belongs to you.

the very thought makes him sick with grief.

looking up, he realizes that there are no stars in tokyo anymore, that there is no feeling of indifference when it comes to you, and that there is no happiness to be had when you are not by his side.

he knows he'll never shed another drop of innocent blood if it means you'll always have that look of adoration in your eyes when your gaze falls on him.

so his trip to the pharmacy is short and hurried.

opening your apartment door, he's careful to be quiet in case you're sleeping, but he finds you peering at him from the couch.

your hair is disheveled. there's a sheen of sweat across your forehead. your eyes are beyond tired. your shirt is wrinkled.

you're still the most pleasing thing he's ever laid eyes on.

"you're back," you rasp.

"i'm back," he affirms, slipping off his shoes.

you sit up and quickly regret it, your hand coming to rest against your stomach. "god, i feel like i'm gonna puke."

"charming."

you use all your strength to throw a pillow at him, which he easily catches before tossing something small in your direction— a ginger chew to help with the nausea.

you unwrap it and pop it in your mouth. "thanks."

he hums in response, settling down in the spot beside you. once he pulls the medicine from the bag, it's followed by two bottles. "got you these, too."

recognizing them as your favorite drink, your exhausted and delirious brain makes your eyes well up with grateful tears. "you're so sweet."

"yeah, whatever. don't get used to it."

"but you are. you're sweet and kind, except i'm the only one who knows it," you pause before continuing, your head falling onto his shoulder. "why is that?"

he contemplates denying that he possesses any such quality, but decides against it. "you're the only one who's ever cared to know."

he can feel the heat of your temple through his shirt, so he opens the box of fever reducers and pops out two tablets before handing them to you. "take these. you're burning up."

you do as he says without protest. standing up and stretching your arms above your head, sukuna's eyes wander to where your shirt rides up and reveals your stomach.

"c'mon, let's go to bed," you yawn.

he follows after you wordlessly, carelessly pulling off his shirt and climbing into bed beside you. curling up against his side, your head comes to rest on his chest and it's quiet for a few passing moments.

"you can't see the stars from tokyo anymore."

"what?" you ask sleepily.

"the stars. there's too much light to see them from here."

"oh, yeah. we can take a trip to the mountains soon. you can see them pretty well from there."

"i'll hold you to that."

and so with the promise of a beautiful night sky, with the company of someone who means the world to him, and with the feeling of your body pressed against his— sukuna feels that he had been happy and that he was happy again.

a/n 2: hey! so i'm sorry again for stopping updates without really saying anything. i think i just needed to step away from tumblr and writing for a while because i was getting a bit overwhelmed. i was also a little unsure about the direction of this chapter. i was struggling to incorporate the necklace part without it seeming cheesy or weird. that being said, thanks as always to everyone for your support of this series. it's really heartwarming and much appreciated. if you have any feedback, i'd love to hear! i'm not sure when the next update will be, but i'll do my best to keep you guys posted. all my love - m<3

taglist: @96jnie @ay0nha @sad-darksoul @bbysatoruuu @luciiferian @risuola @lirasmoon @disaster-rose @archivist-ghoul606 @creative1writings @sloppyzengarden @omismicrowave @cecesharktales @tanyeonn @hiqhkey @ruixrei @yellowsubiesdance @thefallofruins @anything-and-everything-here69 @emzalot @elusivemoon @annoyingstrawberryballoon @miabiar @hyeon-yi @iluv-ace @wineyoungie @vduxx @inflatabledinosaurs19 @harrystylesfan2686 @silentmajesticfox @am-the-renegade @certainduckanchor @moons-reblog @scarletrosesposts @th3-audac1ty @darlink-xoxo @ayeputita @nanmiik @namjooningera @hermxssaa @annieleonhardtsbitch @nugget-eater123 @integers @thefunbanshee @thepup356 @browneyedgirl22 @lantsovheiress @luckypeacevoid @kiki17483 @ruttteerr @yourbelloved @heyohalie // users in bold could not be tagged. if i forgot to tag anyone, my apologies!! just give me a heads up.

[rott1ngbra1n]

First off! I wanna go ahead and drop some fun art stuff I’ve been doing as I’ve been watching Dragons Rising season 2, which I’ve been loving!

I did a version of Arin before but it wasn’t my favorite so a redo! More AlleyCat stuff and obligatory Cole, because I love him.

I do have more Ninjago Art I want to do (Still need to finish that Cole and Morro friend piece-) and I have some other fandom art I also want to do, but I’ll explain more under the cut as well as why I’ve been gone or a bit less active everywhere. This is optional you do not have to read under the cut!

TW// Transphobia

For those unaware I am a trans man, I go by a different name: both online and IRL (online for privacy’s sake), I also work as a barista due to being a college student and needing to save money for moving away from my own transphobic parents. That’s a whole other story. But at work there was a coworker of mine who was consistently transphobic towards me whenever we worked together. It had been going on since June of last year (The irony of it starting during pride month made me and my friends laugh) but it escalated after I returned from New York, so much so I had to go to management.

Myself. Management had been informed by my best friend (who also works with me) about it and was told it was “gossip”. Ok. Sure- So I informed management of the new incidents and was told I had options, the first being to have a meeting with me, the transphobe, and my manager to discuss the issues. I said no so my manager went to the DM to find another solution. To give even more context, the transphobe couldn’t even be transphobic to my face most times it was always told behind my back to my best friend.

That’s how I knew my manager talked to the transphobe one on one, cause the transphobe right after the meeting went to said best friend. Telling her “not to tell me as she didn’t want to start drama” Cool, I feel so cool. I was very mad, went back to my manager with it, had that meeting with myself, the transphobe, and manager. Where my emotions were downplayed and the transphobe said she had “never interacted with a trans person before and didn’t know what she said was wrong.” OK.

SURE.

After that we assumed it was over, my manager made an incident report, but it didn’t stop the transphobe still kept talking behind my back to others. Despite me talking respectfully of her. More context all the talking behind my back happened at work while on the clock. After a while I just went about my day, then Ethics and Compliance called. They spoke to everyone involved, including me and I relayed more about my testimony. They said they would be investigating and I assumed it would take a while, then finally. I was informed that the transphobe was in fact fired.

This whole situation, along with other personal stuff going on with me, caused so much stress. To the point I tended to fallback into habits I had thought I fixed, mainly regarding my physical health. Even at points hating myself for just existing and having been born wrong.

I’m thankfully doing so much better now and have recently gotten diagnosed with Autism, something I knew I had but didn’t fully understand for a while. I’ve been getting better existing in a world knowing the people that are my blood hate me, knowing that eventually, I will never be able to be loved by my parents or sister. I have friends and coworkers who support me and I want to support other people in this community.

With that said I’m back to making more art! I’m building a portfolio for animation and to intern next year, I also will be trying to post more animations to here when I finish them! I also will still be active in the Ninjago fandom, I’ve loved this show since it came out in 2011 y’all can pry it from my cold dead hands-

But I do want to make more original work, I want to do more Star Wars work, QSMP art and animations, and more Musical Theater art whether it be Broadway or Indie productions. I hope people enjoy what I make, especially some of my original characters as I’ve gotten to work on Cybernetic more thanks to my animation class. You’ll see more of it as we go!

Thank you if you’ve read this and thank you for supporting me!

[nightmareentertainment]

Finally had a discussion with a friend and I've landed on why I hated Hazbin Hotel (outside of the vivziepop situation) and after bingeing it hopping from dubious illegal website to even worse more illegal website, we've finally pinpointed it.

The fucking pacing is trash.

Okay so here's the pros of this series: The designs, art style, voice actors, concepts, themes, and motivations are cool as fuck. However. The pacing single handedly ruins at least half of the actual meat of the story- what were getting is kiddie-sized packages of episodes, stuff you'd see in kids shows where there's a problem that ultimately gets resolved in the next 20 minutes. It's, frankly- bad. It's bad.

Sir Pentious could have easily had an arc in which he exists as a spy, relaying (perhaps useless, considering the silliness of his character) information and team-rocket style fails to mess things up for the hotel. The arc could have included him slowly enjoying the place, fitting in, trusting others, and ultimately doubting the plot and having a gross, emotional moment when he's found out because he doesn't want to leave- that would've made Charlie' acceptance so much more impactful to the story. It would've made Sir Pentious a more interesting, full character rather than an extra who joined the gang.

Charlie and her dad could've been a series-drawn arc in which she tries to contact her father and fails repeatedly with the idea from the original episode of meeting Adam, trying to get to the higher-ups to get a REAL meeting, only for him to show up and talk down at her idea, we needed a BUILD UP for this episode. It feels flat and unpersonal.

Vaggie being an angel. Oh my god. I need to sit down. I cannot stress how forced this felt. No blatant hints? No cliff-hanger from a previous episode implying this? Idk, perhaps from the fucking FIRST EPISODE? would've been a REALLY COOL REVEAL if we had MORE of a BUILD UP.

The pacing, man. The pacing is getting me. It's getting my ass. It's bad. It had a lot of potential. Give me the pen. Let me- listen man. It just needs a little bit of writing. I got them. Let me handle it. PleasePleasePLEASE I could do it better.

Disclaimer: I have considered that the pacing may be due to budgeting or how to push the production out but I still think the show is objectively bad pacing-wise and genuinely I do not actually care enough on why it's so poorly managed. It had some interesting characters and plot lines that result could've gone somewhere. The music in alot of it is REALLY good. I enjoy the concepts for the characters. Pacing is bad. There's no room for theorizing and cliffhangers and baited breath it's just fast and quick and over its a massive let down bye its time for me to go to bed

[milksockets]

i recently had a very heartwarming exchange… about a typo.

to start at the beginning, at some point during my first couple of weeks at this job, i stopped by my supervisor’s office to mention that i’m very good at spotting typos if that’s something that would ever come in handy. i was referring both to the blizzard of daily emails as well as the information system program we use for documentation. he laughed and said he appreciated it, but also that a lot of people - including himself - are writing emails and whatnot all day and don’t necessarily have the time or ability to catch such errors. i remember thinking “yeah, that’s something i hadn’t really considered” and went on my merry way. note: his office door was open during the exchange because the discussion was not super private or confidential so why the fuck wouldn’t it be.

so the next day, i am summoned into his office, with the door closed this time. turns out some lurking busybody cunt with nothing better to do was hovering around and overheard the conversation, and decided to report it to both him and the supervisor above him that it was inappropriate and “who is this nurse who just started here talking about typos.”

i was flabbergasted at the time, but since then, it’s become apparent just how many things of that nature happen in offices (or mine at least; i’ve never worked in one before). when it comes specifically to pointing out a panoply of constant typos, i am not doing so in a manner that translates to “you’re a fucking idiot and i want to make you feel bad about it.” i guess i foolishly thought people might be open to hearing about ways they could improve their writing to avoid miscommunication.

there have been other instances of this ilk, namely that this woman moved into the office with a door next to me (the rest is an open plan type deal) and never has her door closed, whether she’s screaming into her phone, having an irl meeting, or blasting a podcast. like go figure, that’s sort of distracting and wearing headphones is not a solution because then i can’t hear if someone is trying to get my attention (or sneaking up behind me while i’m online shopping). it soon became very apparent that simply asking this lady to close her fucking door because other people do work here - but in nicer words - had the potential to cause a dramatic upheaval in office politics. i also had said that i would hope anyone in the office with a similar issue with me or my team would feel comfortable simply bringing it up for resolution.

it’s insane to me that these instances of direct communication about practical matters affecting other people are almost taboo and that i’ve been considered “inappropriate” on several occasions for relaying such remarks. also don’t say you value feedback if you actually don’t. let’s not play pretend here.

anyway, yesterday i passed a piece of street art that said “fight facism” and the artist tagged their IG handle so i just messaged them to say i thought they might like to know it’s misspelled. they were so fucking grateful, and said they’re glad someone pointed it out so nicely so they can fix it for the next batch. truly the antidote to the fragile, wretched office bullshit and evidence that i am doing god’s work.

so the moral of this story is that i need to find a way to get paid for finding typos. i mean, i spot them in just about every published book i read, too. and, friends, there is a solution: me.

[blossom-adventures]

TES Summer Fest 2023, Day 1: Arcane

What’s this?! I actually shifted into gear and wrote something this morning, and have already started working on the next 2 days worth of prompts?! @tes-summer-fest

My prompts will be based around my Skyrim fics, either my Dragonborn story (Far Horizons & Ancient Stones) or my Dawnguard story (The Blood Prophecy) I’ll colour the above title accordingly ☺️

It was rare that Ulfric needed to see his Court Mage to ask the man for advice, but after receiving a rather concerning letter from one of his contacts within Solitude, he felt like he needed to.

As he approached the workshop and study belonging to his Court Mage he over heard voices

“Did you continue with your studies after you left Windhelm?” Wuunferth asked, Ulfric took a step closer to see if he could hear who his Mage was talking to

“Not at the College, no, but I haven’t stopped using magic all together” Ulfric hissed out a curse as he heard the Dragonborn’s voice, he didn’t want to discuss his letter while she was there, so he went to leave

“Jarl Ulfric?” Wuunferths voice called out, the Jarl sighed, before returning to the door way of Wuunferths study, “you must know by now, lad, that you can’t sneak up on me” Ulfric tried to hide the smirk on his face, even now he was 4 years shy of 50, Wuunferth always called him ‘lad’ or ‘boy’ “what can I do for you, Jarl Ulfric?”

“I’m sure it can wait, I didn’t realise you had a visitor,” Ulfric went to leave

“You clearly came for a reason, so stay and ask your questions, Jaina is a former apprentice of mine, you have my word that she can be trusted” Ulfric’s sapphire blue eyes darted over to the Dragonborn for a moment, meeting her dark red ones, before he handed over the letter

“I need your advice, Wuunferth” the old mage read through the letter

“‘Rumours of strange magic in Solitude?’ Hmph… you think it’s the Thalmor?”

“I don’t know, I was hoping you’d be able to…”

“To confirm what is happening on the other side of the country by reading a letter?” Wuunferth raised his brow at Ulfric as he huffed and folded his arms

“I don’t know, do I? I am only familiar with 2 schools of magic; destruction and restoration,” then he hissed in no more than a whisper “and that wasn’t willingly” the Dragonborn cleared her throat, causing the 2 men to look at her

“Jarl Ulfric, I’m needing to travel to Solitude soon, on an unrelated matter, if you want, I can look into this for you, and report back when I return?” Ulfric looked at the Dragonborn, then to Wuunferth, who nodded his approval

“Very well,” the Jarl said, “when is it you’re travelling?”

“I’ll help liberate Falkreath, Kaidan and I leave in the morning, then I plan to head to Solitude when Falkreath flies Stormcloak colours”

“Alright. In the meantime, I’ll request my contact keeps an eye on this ‘strange magic’ he wrote about, if he sends anymore information to me, I’ll try and relay it to you” the Dragonborn nodded, Ulfric bid them farewell and left his Court Mage and the Dragonborn to their conversation.

[anchanted-one]

Legend of Lightning Chapter 49. The Wolf

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43208574/chapters/112494664

@swtorhub

The Next Day, Organa Castle

The Jedi were both led into the duke’s dining room for breakfast. If Vajra’s chambers were rich, the duke’s were opulent.

He tried not to stare around at all the decorations, and instead focused his attention on the others who had been called to attend the meeting. He was greeted by Duke Charle and General Gesselle Organa. Also invited was a young man of around twenty, and an older Iridonian Zabrak.

“Greetings, Master Jedi,” the young man said. “I hear I have you to thank for saving my family. I am Wynne Organa, and I was in charge of peace talks to end this conflict.”

“‘Was’?”

“I’m afraid peace negotiations fell through after Duke Horis Thul was murdered by his son, Septimius. He houses a bitter hatred for the world which exiled his whole House, and saw his little influence fading when… well, I’ll get to that. I really should allow the good doctor to speak first.”

“Forgive me,” Vajra bowed to the Zabrak.

“Think nothing of it, Son. My name is Parvux, and I was one of the lead scientists in charge of the Death Mark project. I worked closely with Master Orgus as he shut the project down.” He snorted. “I hated him at first. We all did. We were building a weapon which could kill Imperial collaborators like Kendoh and Septimius Thul, so that we wouldn’t need to sacrifice whole armies for their ambitions. But then he saved my life. You see, the dismantling was going smoothly at first, but one day, one of our most trusted security officers revealed herself as a spy. Alayna Hark timed it perfectly; everything had been placed into a speeder for transport when three minor Killik hives burst in. She used the chaos to her advantage, making off with not only the Death Mark controls, but also the targeting device. By the time Master Orgus finished off the last of the Killiks, she was long gone.”

“And she got to work almost at once,” Wynne picked up the thread. “She came to Count Alde—who was the project’s cofounder and most important patron—and gave him a sob story about a Sith Lord who slaughtered everyone. And, sad to say, the Count believed her. He gave her the full run of the Castle. She got close enough to mark nearly fifty people with the targeting device. Count Alde was the first to die, and dozens of high-ranking officers followed him to the grave.”

“Was that what happened?” Duke Charle looked appalled. “We thought… we thought… holy lord almighty…”

General Gesselle slammed her hand down on the table. “And when were you planning to tell us this? Charle and I met her too, you know! We literally have a 'hit me here!' sign painted on our bodies!”

“Their deaths crippled our war effort,” the duke stammered. “It was for that reason Bathor’s legions managed to walk all the way to our doors!”

“Don’t you get it, Charle?” Gesselle looked furious. “We were in danger too! This is the weapon that killed Blenks!”

“And I’m sorry about that,” the duke apologized, but his face turned red with anger for some reason. “I’m sorry you lost your closest friend, Gesselle. But it is my duty to think of my people’s safety before my own. Before your own. We can mourn Blenks later. And we can discuss this later,” he added. General Gesselle fumed, but went silent. “What I want to know, is why the killings stopped.”

It was Parvux who answered. “It was because Master Orgus destroyed the transmitters which allowed the device to relay targets to the laser. No one here knows what the frequency of that satellite is, and we can’t find the laser and change its antenna, since it’s cloaked. That is why her killings stopped.”

“But she didn’t get away with her deeds,” Wynne went on. “My spies saw her enter Duke Thul’s bunker. Master Orgus was close enough to intercept her. He snuck in through a ventilation shaft, and the duke was ready to believe him over her. He gave up Lord Nefarid’s location, and your Master decided to go there alone. We don’t know how he was defeated, but Nefarid captured him and sent Angral his prize. You know the rest.”

“What happened to Alayna Hark?”

“Duke Thul captured her, but Lord Nefarid freed her once he instigated Septimius to stage his coup. I do not know where she is now.”

“Do we have any leads at all?”

“None, I’m afraid. We briefly secured the facility where Master Orgus confronted Nefarid, but he had already moved. A gloating card was all we found.”

“We need to stop Nefarid before he figures out how to reconnect with his satellite,” Vajra looked around the table. “Var Suthra said it could take months, but they have a huge lead on us. I could use your help. Any at all.”

“We will offer any assistance we can, of course. We do have a stake in this after all.”

General Gesselle did not say anything, but Vajra noticed her eyes had gone red, and her lower lip trembled.

“Unfortunately, we’re backed into a corner here. If you can push back the Wolf’s Jaws—the forces led by the Wolf Baron—perhaps we can regain our footing enough to begin searching.”

“I’ll be glad to assist, of course.”

“Good. Now, let us set this grim talk aside for now. I’m sure you are all hungry. Barnobis? Please bring the food.”

“Very good, sir.”

*

Seven hours later

Vajra landed in the midst of the trio of war droids. He cut them down with a single sweep of his Lightsaber.

“How is it going T7?”

<Status report: Progress = 97%. Estimated time remaining = 12 minutes.>

Vajra tried not to display his impatience. “Keep it up.”

The Wolf Baron lived up to his name. He only had a fraction of the forces which Lord Bathor had, but he was using it to great effect. He had launched rapid raids at multiple objectives in a short time. Not pitched battles and sieges, nor any major offensives, just fighting back Organa garrisons long enough to accomplish objectives before retreating again.

One of their many missions had been sneaking up to ancient surface-to-air defences which Duke Charle had called ‘The Spears of Organa’ and reprogramming them. They now fired on all targets indiscriminately, requiring an urgent response. Vajra had been in favor of destroying the cannons, or at least their computers, but the duke had insisted on taking them back.

Which was why he now had the task of protecting T7 as the little droid reprogrammed the turrets. Which was a time-consuming mission because of their unfamiliar, millennia-old coding process. It had taken hours just to reprogram one!

He keyed his comm. “Kira?”

“I’m here, Boss. We’re about thirty minutes from completing our task.”

“We’re almost done here,” Vajra said. “Have you had any problems?”

“Just a couple of war droids every fifteen minutes or so.”

“Nothing too dangerous, yet forcing us to stay in one place? Just as I thought.”

“We’re being delayed. It’s just as we all thought.”

It wasn’t just Vajra who had smelled a rat, but also General Kashim. Only General Gesselle had supported the plan to liberate the Spears. Unlike the Jedi’s teams, most of the committed forces were platoons. A good thirty platoons—over 1000 soldiers—were sent out to just retake the defenses. And each recapture had taken hours. More troops had been sent out to liberate other positions, from villages and homesteads, to outposts and crossings.

The Organas had only about a third of their forces to respond to any new threats.

“Well, it’s too late now,” Vajra sighed. “Score one for the Wolf Barron. Three hours is long enough to raze half the coast. Not that he’ll do such a thing.”

<Reprogramming = complete!> T7 trilled. <Status = ready to depart!>

“Good. We’ll meet up with Kira then. Let’s get moving—”

They were interrupted by a frantic call. “Master Jedi!”

“Hello, General Gesselle. I imagine the wolf struck while your forces were occupied?”

The middle-aged woman averted her gaze. “He did. You were all right. He wanted our forces to be diverted. While they were, he took hundreds of our people hostage. He has offered us a civil meeting to discuss his terms.”

“So what’s our next step?”

“Charle is insistent on meeting him. With minimal guards, as demanded. It’s a trap, and he’s walking right into it.”

“In the worst-case scenario, who succeeds him as Duke?”

She flinched. “I do. Do you—does that make you suspicious of me? I overruled yours and Kashim’s advice, after all.”

He scanned her image through the Force, kicking himself for not doing so earlier. What he saw surprised him.

“You’re preg—?” he cut off his sentence, but her eyes snapped in his direction. A hunted expression came over her eyes. “No. I do not think you plotted against Duke Charle, or House Organa.”

The look on her face—he knew that expression. It was guilt. But his instincts told him that whatever her transgression, she had not aided the enemy.

“I made a mistake,” she said bitterly. “A few weeks ago, I would not have fallen for such an obvious trap, even without you and Kashim to clue me in. But that damned woman… Lady Rooks… meeting her unnerved me. Worse was when I lost Blenks. He was my closest friend for over a decade.”

“That doesn’t matter right now. We need to defeat the Wolf Baron.” Vajra sighed. “Does he have an actual name?”

“Baron Jharkus Thul. He may not be a Duke, but his has been the strongest claim to the Throne from the Thul’s side. Not because of blood, you understand. He is that good. A good commander, an honorable gentleman, a polite noble, and a skilled duelist.”

“I really should have asked before now,” Vajra lowered his head. “If I’d known… I guess we’re both of us not at our best right now.”

“Perhaps,” Lady Gesselle said reluctantly. “I admit, I do not feel impartial enough to make a decision here. And Kashim is out of reach at the moment.”

“Please don’t do this to me,” Vajra begged. “Var Suthra did it on Coruscant. I barely scraped through.”

“But you did. And now, your prowess is needed again. Paladin of House Organa, I humbly beseech you. Save my husband. And my House.”

“Send me Baron Jharkus’ history and profile,” he growled. “I need to know what kind of person I’m dealing with.”

“Stand by. I’m sending you the coordinates so you can start going.”

“Did you hear that, Kira?”

“I caught the gist. I’ll leave right now. I can set this turret to blow, and rendezvous close to the meeting place within forty minutes.”

“Good. I’ll be counting on you.”

*

Baron Jharkus Thul both loved and hated his moniker. ‘The Wolf Baron,’ a title capable of striking fear into the hearts of his enemies, and instilling fervor in allies. It spoke of his power.

But he hated it. Wolves were ferocious, rabid creatures. While they did understand the strength in unity, they did not comprehend nobility and courtesy. He was much more than just a warrior. He was someone truly worthy of being a king, more so than Bouris Ulgo.

A king could not be a king, if all he knew was war. Jharkus was adept in other areas too. Etiquette, diplomacy, economics, law, and even agriculture. Not enough to handle it all, all by himself, of course. But enough that no advisor could pull the wool over his eyes.

His bid for the throne was not purely out of personal ambition; he simply knew he could do a better job than any other monarch in the galaxy.

“Your Highness,” Captain Turcois bowed before him. “A speeder is approaching. It’s flying House Organa’s colors.”

“House Organa’s? Not the Duke’s?” he had expected as much. The Duke was fully expecting to lose his life here today. The man had courage, if nothing else. “Show him in when he gets here.”

Jharkus sat in his tent. His niece Elana sat close by. She looked at him expectantly. “What is to happen to our poor Duke?”

Jharkus sighed. Elana was a good girl, but she had grown too used to the others of their House. Lustful Kendoh and cowardly Horis. Most of their family thought more like a crime family than a Noble House. This was one reason why he had requested that she join him, once her mansion had been raided in retaliation for her actions.

He wanted her to treasure their House, as he did. To fight for it.

“Nothing too grisly, my dear Niece. We trade his freedom for that of the civilians.”

“But what will that accomplish?” she asked. “He will no doubt have assigned his successor just in case something happened to him.”

“True. But, to whom?”

“His wife. Gesselle Organa.”

“And therein lies the downfall I have envisaged for his House. You see, he seems to be the only Organa who doesn’t know a rather open secret.”

“Huh?”

“Gesselle Organa is pregnant… with her lover Blent’s child. With Charle out of the picture, his cousins and siblings will not want a woman like Gesselle on the throne. Bad enough she’s a commoner. But she’s an adulteress too, one who showed rank ingratitude by disrespecting the man who elevated her to nobility. Without Charle Organa to keep them in line, the House will fall apart.”

“A wise plot, dear Uncle. But what of the Jedi? The one who wiped out two legions by himself?”

“He will be drawn further from the politics as time goes on,” Jharkus assured her. “Remember; he’s not here for the Organas. He’s here for Darth Angral’s pet project. All we have to do, is survive the next few days. Long enough to return to friendly lines.”

The tent flaps were parted to allow his guests inside. Duke Charle followed his bodyguard, Heronus. He was dressed in robes that did the bare minimum of meeting the criterion ‘befitting his station’. He had nothing on him that might count as something to surrender, except for an old sword.

“Baron Jharkus.”

“Duke Charle,” Baron Thul smiled and bowed. “Thank you for calling me by my name, and not my epithet.”

“Of course. Today, I meet the man, not the wolf.”

“I am only ever the man, my good Duke. You do your ancestors proud, by adhering so admirably to their espoused virtues as well as you do.”

“As do you. House Thul lost their way for a while, but the old ways are strong in you. If only you served the Republic, instead of the Empire, I would have offered to back your claim to the throne.”

Jharkus beamed at that.

“And you are… Lady Elana Thul, am I correct?”

“That’s right, Duke Organa,” Elana curtseyed. “I am pleased to make your acquaintance. Word of your integrity had reached me when I was a babe in my crib.”

“At the end of the day, what people say of us can outlast our flesh by centuries. I do hope the things said about you are things you can be proud of. I predict you have a long career ahead of you.”

“What a nice thing to say,” Elana smiled. “Truly, I am glad to hear your encouragement.”

The duke bowed again. Jharkus knew the man’s reputation. He was as honest as he was cultured. There was no way he’d have spoken untrue words, even as idle pleasantry. Just what did he know about Elana? What did he know about his Family?

“Shall we begin our discussion?”

“Of course. I’m sure, that you want me in exchange for my people.”

“That is one of my demands. The other, is that you order your people to let us depart for House Thul’s lands. A ceasefire would be nice too, though perhaps that’s a bit much to ask for.”

“You hope that my absence would be enough for House Organa to fall apart.”

“General Gesselle is a worthy commander, but not a woman your House would rally behind.”

“For all your cunning, you do not understand House Organa. My family will do what is right, even if it’s hard.”

“Perhaps my move is earmarked for failure then,” Jharkus sighed. “I suppose it happens to those who gamble. Unfortunately, this is all I can manage right now. Your new Paladin destroyed most of the army allocated to defeating your Family.”

“How do you know that I made him a Paladin?”

“Oh, come now, Duke! You have eighteen thousand people in your city. Surely you can’t believe they’re all loyal to you?”

“What do you know that I don’t?”

“Why, that’s a topic for several books! And I’m sure there’s much you know, that I don’t! Something we can both discuss, later. Once your escort is safely returned to your gates. You may keep your servants, if they choose to stay. They will look after you in your captivity.”

“There is no need. They have been ordered to return to Castle Organa. They will continue to serve my House, and the war effort. I trust your reputation, Jharkus. You will not mistreat your prisoners. Even if you don’t… I deserve this. To have allowed you to take so many of my people hostage… what a blunder that was.”

“Yes. To be honest, I didn’t expect that to go as well as it did. Didn’t Gesselle oppose you… oh, of course. She is grieving for her closest friend. Anyone can make a mistake in that state.” He tsked. “Let’s set that aside for now. Let’s prepare our message to your Family.”

The tent flaps parted, and Lord Gustab entered. Not only was the Sith young, he was one of the lowest ranking Sith in the Alderaan system, so he didn’t have that air of arrogance yet. “Pardon the intrusion, My Lords. There’s an urgent call coming in from Darth Angral.”

“Angral? What does he want—”

“That’s Lord Angral to you, Baron,” a voice barked over his holo. The frightening visage of the Butcher of Coruscant appeared in the air above it. “And I have a very simple directive for you. Someone of your reputation should be able to understand this. I want that Jedi, the one who broke the final siege of the Organas.”

“I’m afraid I can’t comply with that request, my Lord. He is beyond us. Only a fellow Sith should be able to capture him for you—”

“Gustab told me you have hostages. Use them. Demand the boy’s surrender, and he will fall over himself to save those pitiful lives.”

“But my Lord, I have already concluded negotiations to release them—”

“Baron Thul. You seem to be under the impression that I was giving you a choice. Capture the four-armed freak, and put him on the shuttle that will arrive at Thul Palace tomorrow. If you comply, I will send you some reinforcements for your war. Fail me, and you will die a painful death.” His eyes travelled to Elana, whom Duke Charle reflexively tried to shield from view. “Gustab. Take the girl.” All eyes jumped to Elana, who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. “If the Baron does not succeed, he will live knowing that his kinswoman will be my plaything.”

Gustab drew his Lightsaber and advanced on Elana, who started screaming. “Please! Don’t do this! I—I’m an ally of the Empire! Call Akahte, or Darth Zash! They can vouch for me—”

“Zash may be a Darth… but she isn’t even in the middle of the food chain. I, on the other hand, rank near the very top. I am a mere step beneath the Dark Council.”

“Darth Malgus,” Duke Charle spoke up in a strong, voice, but pleading. “I am Duke Charle. I was just taken prisoner by Baron Thul. The Baron is an honorable man, who does not like seeing his prisoners treated badly. Take me, instead. It will be just as painful for him, and a blow on his prestige.”

Jharkis wanted to kiss the man. He knew he might be consigned to a painful death, but he hadn’t hesitated. He had stepped up, to save Elana. By all rights, his enemy.

Gustab looked at Angral, clearly favouring this idea as well. But Angral scoffed after a long moment. “Gustab… kill the duke for speaking out of turn. Then take the girl hostage. Bring me his head, too. A neat little trophy it will make.”

Gustab hesitated no further. He moved to stab the duke. Jharkis drew his blaster and fired on Gustab—thanking his stars that he had a habit of leaving it on stun. But Gustab’s lover entered the fray. Eklarie was a low-level Sith, just like Gustab, but much less friendly. She cut the blaster out of the Baron’s hand, but Jharkus was already moving. He drew his rapier and dashed in front of Organa, ready to protect his prisoner to the death— “HRRK!”

Only to find himself lifted several feet into the air by the invisible hand on his throat. Angral smiled at him mockingly as Gustab slew Organa and took his head, after which both he and Eklarie took a screaming Elana out of the tent. Gustab looked at the baron apologetically, but there was no coming back from this. I will kill you, if I can. Slowly!

Angral dropped the baron to the ground, laughing. “What an amusing little show you put on for me! I have a reward for you.”

A reward?

“Two further terms for the girl’s safe release. Put the good Duke’s body on a spike and display it for all the Organa to see. In addition, once the Jedi is safely in your grasp, you will slaughter your hostages in front of him. Record his screams for me. I want to hear him tearfully shout ‘But you promised!’” The cruel Sith slapped his belly, nearly falling over himself laughing as his holo vanished.

Jharkus dropped to his knees and sobbed like a child. He wept for Elana, that sweet but pragmatic girl. He wept for gallant Duke Charle Organa, whose spirit of self-sacrifice had moved him to protect an enemy without second thought. Why, why had it come to this?

*

The young Knight was ushered into Jharkus’ tent not long after. He had come alone.

He uttered a foul oath when he saw Duke Charle’s headless body, but stopped short of attacking Jharkus when he saw his enemy’s tear-stained face. “What happened here?”

“Angral happened,” Jharkus croaked. “I was just about to conclude a peaceful solution, when Angral interrupted.” He swallowed. What was his pride, when compared to Elana’s life? A life that the noblest Duke had given his own life to protect? He would play the part the butcher had demanded. “I am to take you prisoner, in exchange for all the hostages. Surrender, or they will all be executed.”

The Jedi’s face darkened for a moment, then he tilted his head and snorted. “Very nice threat. ‘A’ for effort. But your heart’s not quite into it. I’m glad acting isn’t one of your many talents. Now, stop wasting our time, and tell me what really happened here.”

He helped Jharkus into a chair, listening carefully to all he had to tell him.

“So what you’re saying is, that you want to get me to Darth Angral, to save Lady Thul’s life? Not such a bad trade, is it? After all, I’m trying to meet the good Darth myself.”

Jharkus took a moment to register the words. “What are you plotting?”

“Take me to Thul Palace, as Angral demanded. Once there, I will help you free Elana. From there, I can take his own shuttle back to Angral’s ship. I really need to show that coward how to kiss the floor.”

“I would give both my arms to see you do that,” Baron Jharkus said in the most severe tones he had ever used. “That man… the word ‘butcher’ does not come close to encapsulating his cruelty!”

“Glad you’re onboard.” He knelt down to the body beside Baron Jharkus and pressed his forehead to the chest. “I’m sorry, Duke Charle. I promise, your death won’t be in vain.”

“I also swear,” Baron Jharkus mirrored the boy’s gesture, though it wasn’t an Alderaanian one. It felt appropriate. “I will save the life you sacrificed your own for. I will honor your nobility.”

*

[dangerouslyintofictionalloves]

You Don't Know (Part Two)

Meet OC Meet OC's Family Part One Prologue Part Three Chapter Two Part Four Chapter Three (link coming soon) Part Five Chapter Four (link coming soon) Final Part Chapter Five the Finale (link coming soon)

pairing: Billy Andrews x Fem OC (East Asian FC | Southeast Asian Fem OC)

warnings/notes: fluff, implied romance, best friends to lovers possible trope, unspecified relationship, possible one sided feelings, historical inaccuracies

Also the entire story was written while listening to the song You Don't Know by Katelyn Tarver.

↠ C h a p t e r O n e ↞

Genevieve sighed to herself softly as she started unpacking her suitcases, that were full of her belongings. Her parents were in their study discussing business, her sister was respectfully in her bedroom writing poetry, and everyone else was doing their daily duties at the Brown Estate.

The Brown's purchased the most wealthy land in Avonlea. A huge plot of farmland and could easily fit two more homes if they chose to do so.

Genevieve finished with her unpacking and set away her suitcases in the hallway. Walter and Stephen usually put the suitcases away in a certain compartment in the home that kept them out of the way and organized.

After some time of contemplating to herself, she decided to get out of the house for once. When they were in Florida, all she did was stay inside their temporary home. Avoiding a lot of interaction with others.

She nodded to herself proud of her decision and slowly walked down the first flight of stairs. Her hand hovering slightly over the glossy, dark brown, wood banister just in case she missteps and is able to catch herself before she tumbles.

Smiling softly as she looked around her familiar childhood home, she graciously made her way down the last flight of stairs. She knew she needed to let her parents know of her whereabouts before leaving the home so she looked all around the first floor for them. They were not in the study like they were before she had unpacked her belongings.

Sighing in slight defeat she walked outside and found Stephen. He was working on repairing the wooden fencing that surrounded the perimeter of the property. Once he noticed her presence, he stopped his work and turned towards Genevieve. "Miss Brown, good afternoon. What can I assist you with?"He asked.

She sighed softly and looked around making sure that her parents weren't just somewhere about to make sure she could relay the message to Stephen. "Hello Stephen, I was not able to locate my parents. But I just wanted to relay the message to you since you're on the property. I'll be heading out into town to explore and to clear my mind. Just getting a bit of fresh air. If they are wondering about my whereabouts please let them know I alerted you first before I left."She explained.

Stephen looked at the young girl and he smiles reassuringly. "The moment I spot your parents I'll alert them of your adventure. I know your parents well darling. We both know they'll want you home safe before sun down"He said. She smiled and nodded as a thank you. He nodded in return with a smile as well.

She turns on her heels and walks towards the main gate. Quite an adventure in itself. It was about a mile walk from the back of the estate towards the front. 'So much for living below our means' she thought to herself as she started to breathe a little heavier due to the distance of her walk.

The fresh air and the scenery of Avonlea still amazed her. A genuine smile grew on her lips and she just ran through the first gate and into the forest where she had her first ever adventure and met her best friend Billy Andrews.

Leaves were crunching beneath her feet as she ran and ran deeper into the woods. She kept running until she saw the creek she used to spend most of her days while studying silently on her own.

Spinning slowly, she absorbed the images of her surroundings. Her heart beating fast with her love for her childhood home. Oh how she missed this place within the few years she was gone.

Her focus slowly making its way back to the creek, she smiled and walked slowly over to her favorite boulder that she would sit and study on for days.

Her delicate hands brushed over the boulder and she smiled to herself, feeling every little crack and crater. A little scribble caught her eye and she lowered her body into a squatting position. Giggling softly to herself she smiled seeing initials that she had engraved into the boulder. 'G.B & B.A'

Not only was this boulder the area where she spent her days studying. Billy and Genevieve would also have picnics here when he needed extra help with his studies. Genevieve being so far ahead in her studies, had promised his family that she would help him excel in his school work. Instead of being cooped up in their bedrooms, they chose to come to this spot with a picnic basket full of food. Knowing that they'd stay out for hours and get peckish. She couldn't understand how such a bright mind like Billy could be so behind in his studies but she never minded spending more time with her best friend.

• Flashback •

Billy was laying down across the boulders with his head on Genevieve's lap. She was stroking his hair softly and smiled down at him. His eyes were closed but he had a smile resting on his face.

"Billy, I don't understand how you could be so far behind in your studies you know. When we are studying together you have never failed in answering any of the questions I ask you correctly."Genevieve said. One of his eyes popped open to peak at her to see if she was still looking at him before closing again seeing that she was now looking at the water.

He took a breath and held Genevieve's hand (the one that was stroking his hair), bringing it close to his chest since her other hand was supporting his head on her lap. "Evie, I focus more when I'm with you. At school I absorb the knowledge but the teacher is a fool. I mean he is crude and doesn't know how to properly deal with children."Billy said softly hoping she wouldn't push for more information.

Genevieve hummed softly accepting his response and turned to look down at him again. "Alright, I guess I could understand. Not everyone gets the privilege to be taught by someone who truly cares about your education"She said understandingly.

Billy's eyes fluttered open and he looked into her eyes smiling softly. "You know what I'm capable of as well. Sometimes I don't feel that it is necessary to have to prove that to others that aren't as worthy of that information."He said.

She rolled her eyes playfully and pulled her hand out of his grasp so she could grab an apple out of their basket. "Billy, I thought I spoke to you about this flirting business. It's not appropriate for our relationship."She said. He chuckled and then sat up facing her. "Our relationship?"He asked teasingly as his face got closer to hers. She gasped in shock and shoved him away from her gently. Earning a chuckle from the boy.

"I'm just joking around Evie. Come on, when the time comes and we are older. I want to know how to talk to women. And what better way to learn that is through practicing with my best friend?"He asked rhetorically. A blush rose upon her cheeks and she turned away from the boy. Slowly taking a bit from her apple, not sure what emotions she was feeling in the moment.

• End Of Flashback •

Genevieve smiled softly at the memory. Her fingers grazed over the initials slowly in a loving manner. Slowly she rose from her squatting position and walked slowly along the creek. She noticed another spot that sparked memories. Only a few trees down from where she currently positioned.

A small field covered by thick oak trees. Her heart skipped a beat thinking back to all the memories she had here. When she would come to just get away and read her novels that her father would purchase for her. Or when she would just want to relax with her best friend.

She laid down into the familiar patch of grass and closed her eyes. "Ah, it's good to be back home"She said to herself.

Unknowingly to her, there was someone watching from afar. Hiding behind the trees. Admiring her beauty and how she laid so still in the patch of grass.

This person slowly walked over to the small field hidden away by trees. Careful not to disturb her, they made sure not to step on any twigs or leaf filled spots on the ground.

Even with the person's intent not to disturb the girl and walk as quiet as they possibly could. Her deep brown eyes fluttered open and her heart stopped as her eyes focused on the figure that was now in front of her.

💕 I hope you guys enjoyed that chapter. Please leave any comments you have down below. And if you have any ideas feel free to leave those down below as well! Thanks for reading! 💕

Word Count: 1504

Originally Written On, Wednesday, October 2nd, 2019.

[pashterlengkap]

I came out as trans in college. Then my lacrosse coach spoke out against trans athletes.

Last summer, Kimberly Russell, then-head women’s lacrosse coach at Oberlin College, defended herself after denigrating trans swimmer Lia Thomas’ 500-yard freestyle win at the 2022 NCAA Division 1 Swimming championships. Russell reported feeling “burned at the stake” after members of her team spoke up about her behavior and sparked conversations with her supervisors about what she could and could not post on social media.  I was on that team.  Related: Riley Gaines & large anti-trans coalition to rally against trans athletes at NCAA convention The NCAA allows trans students to compete as their gender if they meet certain hormone requirements. In Spring 2022, Russell reposted commentary from her friend’s Instagram story relaying the idea that Thomas had an unfair advantage and was not the “real” freestyle winner of that event. Some of my teammates at the time saw the story and voiced their concerns with the athletic director. This resulted in a mediated discussion with our coach and with DEI representatives. Usually on that team, I stayed quiet. But I was one of the only trans members, so I felt the need to speak up.  Never Miss a Beat Subscribe to our daily newsletter to stay ahead of the latest LGBTQ+ political news and insights. Russell champions herself as a protector of women’s sports. She has appeared on Fox News to declare, “The reason we have these opportunities to play and to coach and to do the things we do is because of the women who came before who fought for Title IX.”  She also said she doesn’t think “the younger generation even understands that these opportunities weren’t here years ago, and if we are going to allow biological males to compete in women’s and girl’s sports, why do we even have women’s and girl’s sports, why do we even have Title IX, and why do we have legislation for women?”  It is clear that she thinks trans rights and women’s rights are in contention, and the way she cut off conversation with our team was indicative of her unwillingness to learn, despite touting her office as a “place where people could come to cry, to be loved, to get support”.  We explained the pain that her actions caused the majority of the team. She responded with arguments of biology, seeking to negate any possible validity of Thomas’ win. She lacked any understanding of why trans people are fighting to exist in sports in the first place. I chimed in about the importance of mental health and the necessity to be validated in one’s identity to be able to pursue our passions.  When finding yourself could mean losing your team I came out as trans during my time at Oberlin, and I experienced a profound wave of growth and self-discovery that I could not have found anywhere else. I no longer felt defined by being an athlete in “women’s” sports. I could simply compete as I was. Having played field hockey for 14 years and lacrosse for 6, competing in these sports has made up most of my adolescence and is a huge driver of my work ethic to this day. But coming out enabled me to start redefining my relationship with sports, as well as with my own self-confidence. Trans athletes don’t want to steal competitions and podiums; we are simply motivated individuals who want to compete in the sports that have long made up huge facets of our identities on a team that affirms who we are. Amidst the controversy with Russell, I decided to stay on the team for a while. Despite her anti-trans rhetoric, she prided herself on building a culture of love and understanding and at times had been quite a grounding presence through her belief in holistic wellness.   Independent of Russell, Oberlin was the first place where I understood that my transness and my identity as an athlete were not mutually exclusive. But after Russell’s bouts of misgendering, her use of the term “trans-identifying”, and her insistence that “biological males” shouldn’t be in women’s locker rooms,… http://dlvr.it/T1vdnS

[biblioflyer]

Thoughts about Admiral Clancy and Starfleet Antagonists, Picard s1e2 Rewatch

Narrative and (Un)Reliable Narrators

Should we always trust that the protagonist is right in Star Trek? Was this true in the pre-streaming era of Trek? Is this still a safe assumption? I don’t personally think it has ever been completely true and it definitely isn’t wholly accurate now.

This is part of a series of essays reevaluating Star Trek Picard and interrogating the widely held fandom criticism that Picard made the Federation into a Dystopia.

A topic I’d like to discuss at length is Admiral Clancy’s meeting with Picard. This scene is one of the most hotly debated in some circles as to whether or not the Federation presented in Star Trek Picard has become a dystopia or if the situation was one of those slow running tragedies that happen in environments of terror and limited information.

Clancy is very much taking up the same role as the Interviewer from the previous episode in that she provides more exposition about the Federation’s apparent abdication of its interest in the outside universe and the Romulans in particular. She also acts to reinforce the audience’s perception of Picard acting alone against a hostile and fallen Federation.

I think there’s every reason to think that Clancy is a good faith actor. 

Let me explain what I mean by that. She greets Picard warmly and seems to start off by being cautiously interested, if not concerned for him as one might for a friend or mentor who just lost his chill on live interstellar tv and has had a bit of a cloud hanging over him. Her frustration with Picard doesn’t seem cynical or calculated, she seems genuinely convinced that Picard is waving off inconvenient facts in pursuit of some wild conspiracy theory.

Narratively, Clancy definitely seems like she is supposed to present as self assured. 

Against the broader backdrop of the Star Trek universe, ought we, the audience, to agree with her? 

On a surface level, certainly not! 

After all, Picard is the title character and our hero, therefore he should be unquestionably correct in all things, right? Right? 

As I’ve said before, I think that this show may either intentionally or accidentally be presenting a more complex moral question and thus is pulling its punches when making the case for the Federation’s isolationist and martial turn in order to make it that much more plausible that it can ultimately reclaim its idealism when proven wrong.

Sympathy for the Devil

Characters who narratively function as obstacles may be antagonists, but not bad people.

One of the frustrating things about life, in the real world, and life in the fictional world is that we don’t always know people’s motives or background. What do we know for example about Admiral Clancy’s motivations?

To be frank, we don’t know. Yet if we wanted to conjecture a sympathetic character whose narrative role is to be an obstacle to Picard, it really wouldn’t be hard. Perhaps she’s someone whose experiences in the Dominion War hardened her.  Perhaps she was never a hero in the conventional sense. Perhaps she rose through the ranks commanding depots and shipyards, ensuring supplies got where they needed to be and refits finished on time. 

How many Starfleet officers actually spend their time thumbing their noses at space gods and how many do milk runs to out of the way colonies delivering subspace relays and industrial replicators?

Perhaps one might think that having to resort to starting so many sentences with “perhaps” is a sign of bad storytelling or bad worldbuilding. Perhaps the audience ought not to have to rely so much on imagination or invention. 

Is there a difference between a streamlined narrative to ensure good story momentum and a plot hole? I personally think so. Maybe I’m just a crusty old compassionate soul, but I guess my instinct is to be charitable to fictional characters and non-fictional writers, directors, producers etc.

Author's note: I found myself with a sort of Mandela effect wherein I could have sworn that after looking it up, Admiral Clancy was Admiral Yancy, but when I re-looked it up, it was Clancy. If you see any lingering Yancy's, then I am a variant and please don't report me to the TVA or Starfleet Temporal Affairs.

[voyagerstypewriter]

Friday, October 29th, 2022

First day on my typewriter. I want to use this as a way of therapy to better talk to myself about my experiences and how I’ll use it to further shape my future, My last blog was more to talk myself up and see visuals of what I want but here is the raw emotions that include the pain and joy that lead to where I am now.

As I wrap AX I’m more impressed of how I did not let my attitude be shattered and the remembrance of the death terror. There will be a time where I will stop modeling, I will not be the young me and that allowed me to release the pressure of making sure everything goes as planned. My mental did take a hit as I’ve never experienced a situation where I felt that I was not who they wanted. Not only that, I realized I needed to stand up for myself with what happened with my hair and what I believe looks good or not or I will not stand for anything. Still, I did not pout, I did not leave, I did not show the pain rather I waited for God’s plan and knew that this experience may be one needed so when I see someone else in the situation I know what to say. I will also watch my mouth as I used the word hate about another model not knowing she felt the same way. Yes, she wasn’t very social but that didn’t mean she didn’t deserve to be apart of the production. I thought I was social and ended up just like her the first 2 days, I’m human and so is she. I will work on not judging people above me so roughly and voicing it to others, some comments need to belong to myself so that if a situation does go wrong, others can’t relay back. Overall, a learning experience that in my second year may of needed to happen, in all, it was my second campaign and I’m not the star on every set but I can hold myself to higher standards so that one day, a campaign will be about me.

The most fulfilling part of the job was meeting the other models on set. They showed love for me that was so pure that I felt that I could come and stay with anyone of them and I’d feel welcome. From each part of the world they showed how beautiful the place of where their from has something special. Not one, talked down on where they are from and each had their own travel stories which brought me back to my calling from last weekend in New York where I realized I NEED to travel. I need those experiences as they make me feel the most alive and its the best therapy of finding what it is most important by seeing what others value. The love they showed also made me read back to 1 Corinthians in the Bible where love is discussed specifically:

1 Corinthians 4: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

One quality I want make a commitment to working on is showing the love I have for the people closets to me and people I meet. Call family, tell family you love them. Respond to my friends, call my friends. Tell people you love them not when you have to.

One part I need off my chest is the lust and love. After my experience at the hotel, I reached my lowest point as something I told myself I’d never bring myself to do, I did. Reading the subtle art of now has opened an eye to realizing the most beautiful thing you can do is commit to one person and put love and trust into one person and watch it grow. Sitting in a hotel room on Tinder hoping a girl will come over after texting each other for a few hours or a day is not fulfilling one bit. I wont worry now if its something I’m doing wrong. Like I said before, once I pick who I want to dedicate my time to that’s when love is truly discovered not when I try to see how fast I can get someone to fall in love. That may be the scariest part about our current generation we’re obsessed with seeing how fast we can get someone to love and then once one party is satisfied try to explain that “we didn’t talk for that long” “I’m allowed to see other people, we aren’t dating” is based on people not wanting to commit rather than them thinking their lovable which sadly is me currently but I’m making my commitment and it won’t happen tomorrow, one month, one year but for life.

My last commitment has to be for my alone time. I cannot wait for someone to tell me what I should do release the pressure and stress I’ve put on myself. I’m 24 years old and I need to continue to take my own risks and write my own story and not let someone tell me how to live because they aren’t me. If I feel that the best way for me to free myself is a trip to Barcelona, then I make that decision not ask someone else if its the right idea because for them it may be Madrid, their parents house. Find your own escape.

Stock trading is going well. Continue to do research and allow to be something that becomes apart of you and don’t be scared to talk about it because of “finance bros” as its my other job currently aside from modeling. Take pride in what you do.

I found a way for me freely create content without feeling that I’m trying to hard. I’d love to learn dances on TikTok and do them. I just did an entire campaign where everyone said I can dance. A dancer, singer, model with 4.5 million followers is telling everyone I can dance. Take pride in what you do and allow it to be fun. It isn’t about doing what everyone else is doing, find your strengths and have fun.

Closing this page, thank you Captain Alexander.

[procrastinatorimagines]

Evidence

Fandom: Chicago PD / One Chicago

Pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

Warning/s: shooting

Word Count: 1,615

Request:  Hi ! Can you do a jay halstead × reader where jay and y/n are dating secretly but one night jay left a hickey on y/n necks and on the next day y/n try to cover it up before work but can't and the rest of the intelligence team spot it and jay blush but she makes up a story but the intelligence team know and y/n and jay come clean and tell the rest of the team they are together ❤ thank you

All in all, you thought you’d done pretty well, giving your neck one last look in your rearview mirror before turning on the ignition and heading to the 21st. 

Jay had left your place early, neither of you arriving at work at the same time so as to not raise suspicions, so he’d been heading out the door when you’d finally gotten out of bed, already driving away by the time you spotted the hickey on your neck in your bedroom mirror. 

You were not impressed to say the least, what part of a secret relationship had escaped his mind? With an annoyed groan you got to work covering it up the best you could, applying foundation more skillfully than you’d expected as you got ready for work.

There would be time for words later. 

You were still driving in when the call came over the radio, shooting nearby your location with officers in need of backup, one down. Quickly throwing on your lights you expertly did a u-turn and headed back up the street you’d just passed, noticing people running for covering in the opposite direction to where you were going, frightened with their heads down.

It didn’t take long to stop the suspect, mask over his head and gun waving about in his hands as he shot behind him with reckless abandon at the uniformed officer in pursuit. 

Slamming on your brakes you dove out of your vehicle, gun out and ready to engage. “Hey!” You called, diverting his attention from the other officers as his gun swung in your direction, diving behind a nearby car just as the bullets began to fly. 

You poked your head up after a moment, getting off a shot before he realised the odds weren’t in his favour and took off into the garden of the car behind him. Cursing you slid over the bonnet of the car you were behind. 

“I’ll get him, you get your partner!” You told the officer, who nodded gratefully and ran back to his fallen colleague, his led badly bleeding.

“This is 50 21 Foxtrot responding to the 10 1 on West 47th, I’m on the tail of an armed offender fleeing the scene of the shooting making his way South-” you paused, a little breathless as you hopped a fence and quickly dived to the side, narrowly avoiding another bullet as the offender kept running. You gave your most apologetic look to the women screaming in the garden you’d just entered but kept going, you couldn’t stop now - “through the neighbouring gardens, we should be coming out onto West 48th soon.” 

The sound of cars was getting louder as you ran, a tall fence looking like it separated the two of you and the main road as the offender opened for a narrow side path out onto the street. 

You were gaining on him fast as he tried to climb over it, grabbing his coat and pulling him down. His gun fell from his hand and you kicked it away as he scrambled after it, punching him hard in the jaw as he turned back to lash out at you.

“Stay down,” you ordered breathlessly, gun out and aimed square in his direction as the gate opened behind you, back up coming through. “You have the right to remain silent...” you relayed, getting out a pair of cuffs as you read him his rights and passed him off to the unis to bring back to the 21st in their squad car.

And then you were off to work.

-

“Hell of a morning,” Trudy commented as soon as you eventually stepped into the district, pushing her glasses up onto her head as you approached, an eyebrow going up as you reached the desk, “in more than one way I see.”

Your brow creased, “pardon?” You asked, unsure of what she was suggesting with her tone.

“My mistake, you must have got that bruise during the chase,” Trudy said sarcastically, gesturing to her own neck. Your eyes went a little wide, your hand going to where you’d spent way too much of your morning covering up the hickey Jay had given you. 

“Of course,” you hummed unconvincingly, rushing to the bathroom as Trudy laughed. All that effort to cover it up and your sweat had washed it away, hopefully you could cover it up again before anyone wondered why you weren’t upstairs yet.

Barging into the bathroom you riffled through your bag for the foundation you’d brought, just in case you’d needed to touch it up throughout the day, but in all the excitement of the morning you’d forgotten all about it. Oops.

You were putting the finishing touches on covering it up when the door swung open again, too late to hide what you were doing as you found yourself face to face with Burgess. 

“Voight’s looking for you upstairs,” she relayed, clearly amused as you hurriedly shoved your things back into your bag, embarrassed at being caught red-handed. 

You were going to kill Jay.

She didn’t say anything on the walk up the stairs, but you avoid her eye guiltily as she buzzed you both up and you made your way to the bull pen.

“Took you long enough,” Adam commented when you both emerged, a coffee in his hand as he leaned against the breakroom door. 

“Yeah, sorry, Y/N was busy covering up a hickey in the bathroom,” Burgess replied non-chalantly, much to your emence embarrassment. Kev snorted out a laugh and Jay choked on his drink as you tried not to meet his eye. 

“Was she now?” Hailey laughed, the others clearly enjoying how flustered you were getting. 

“I er- no- it was during the call this morning-” you tried and failed to sound believable as the others laughed more, Adam being the first to notice how red Jay had gotten since the converation began.

“No one’s buying that Y/N,” Kim informed you as Adam clapped Jay on the shoulder. 

“Well that’s interesting,” he commented, watching the way Jay awkwardly cleared his throat, not daring to look at you. The others picked up on it too, the both of you looking very guilty in a room full of trained detectives. 

“Got something to share there Halstead?” Kev asked, Jay finally looking at you with apology in his eyes as he finally saw the pourly applied foundation covering the very visible hickey he’d left.

You both hesitated before answering - was there really any use hiding it anymore? A room full of your closest friends who also happened to be detectives weren’t exactly going to drop the subject, or believe whateve bs you gave them in the moment.

Sharing a mutual resigned nod Jay rubbed the back of his neck, sitting up straighter in his chair. “Okay, well, we’ve kind of...”

“...being seeing each other,” you finished for him, realising he was unsure how to put into words exactly what you’d both been doing. If you were honest, you didn’t know exactly what this was either, you hadn’t discussed labels, but you both had feelings for each other, that much you knew for sure. 

“For how long?” Hailey asked, looking at her partner with slightly narrowed eyes, wondering how long he’d been keeping this from her more than anything.

“A couple months,” Jay said, glancing back up at you with a little smile.

“Months?” Adam was shocked you’d both managed to keep this a secret from them for so long, “and this is the first we’re hearing about it?”

“Well, we didn’t want to get our wires crossed,” you shrugged, gesturing to try and get your point across, “we work together.” That had been one of the first things you’d talked about the first time you’d spent the night together, keeping your personal and professional lives as separate as you could. 

“Yes, you do,” you heard your Sergeant say, jumping as Voight emerged from his office, leaning against the door frame with his arms folded. Uh-oh. “Is this going to get in the way of doing your job?”

You swallowed and shook your head, “no, sir.”

“We’re good Sarge,” Jay said at the same time.

All the teasing and joking smiles from the unit had vanished, waiting for Voight’s reaction with bated breath as he mulled it over in his head. 

“Good,” he nodded, much to your relief, though you knew the conversation was far from over, “because we’ve got a case to get back to.”

He was right, this was work, there’d be time to think and talk about this more later - right now you had a dead city official and a cop in the hospital.

Burgess winked at you as you made your way to your desk, picking up a scrunched up piece of paper you had lying around and throwing at her once Voight’s back is turned. He paused, shaking his head, but didn’t turn back around as he went back to his desk. 

You rolled your eyes at her and settled into your chair, knowing you had a report to write up about this morning’s incident, your perp down in holding at that very moment. 

Still, you couldn’t help but look over at Jay, who was looking right back at you, offering you a small smile which you returned in kind. Voight wasn’t the only one who’d want to finish this conversation later, you and Jay had a lot to talk about now too, given that everything was out in the open. 

Still, as you turned back to your desk and tried to focus on the task at hand, you couldn’t help but feel like everything was going to turn out okay.

[goldheartedsky]

I told myself I wasn’t going to make a post like this—that I wasn’t going to stoop to the level of making call-out posts—but I really can’t stay silent after what has happened in the last day or so.

The TOG fandom has a serious issue with excusing antisemitism and allowing people who have painfully hurt marginalized groups to continue to ignore, dismiss, and refuse to acknowledge their limits of intersectionality in regards to social justice. I have seen it myself, been on the receiving end of it, and have talked to other Jews in this fandom about what’s been going on and it needs to start being addressed.

Now, I’m not going to name names or tag people (mainly because I have been blocked by almost all of them for this very issue) but if you message me I will gladly tell you the users involved in this. Also, if you have doubts of any of this’s validity and would like screenshots, feel free to reach out to me here or via Discord and I will share them.

A lot of this started when a member of the All&More server had brought up the scientific and medical “discoveries” during the torture and medical experimentation that took place during the Third Reich and how a lot of the origin of it isn’t taught. LR made a comment saying that “we are three-dimensional creatures who are stuck moving forward in time and can’t go back” and added that not using the research won’t make past horrors not happen. When the original user added that there has been a movement in medicine for removing Nazi scientists names off discoveries and that progress was slow moving, she deflected the conversation onto herself, saying “Not using research won’t make my family not harmed by the Japanese” and then immediately pivoted into admitting that, from what she understood, there weren’t any particularly valid scientific discoveries made by them. She then said, in regards to said Nazi atrocities, “Take it, learn about it, put it in context, and then own it and transform it.”

A Jewish member of A&M voiced their discomfort about possibly taking medicine that was a direct result of the murder of their grandparents and other relatives, to which LR said, “Still stuck in the 3rd dimension, still moving forward in time.” I brought up the fact that medicine was built on antisemitism and racism and that starting over would be better than a lot of the procedures we have now. There is a longstanding issue in medicine of disregarding black pain and so much of what we have now is created by eugenicists—including Nazi scientists. There is still a lot of Jewish trauma due to medical experimentation and that is oftentimes dismissed.

LR then made a flippant comment about “Does this count as Godwin’s Law?”—which is about how all internet discussions lead to someone being compared to Nazis/Hitler. When called out on the inappropriateness of the comment, she did not respond and was backed up by one of the mods of the server. There was no apology made nor an acknowledgment about the casual antisemitism of the comments she made and the dismissal of Jewish trauma/pain.

Now, fast forward a couple months when I was contacted by a third party who had not been in the server at the time but had joined and heard about what LR had said there. H said they were friends with LR and had concerns about antisemitism and would like my perspective. I explained what had happened and offered screenshots if they would like them, which they did. They thanked me and apologized that it got to a point that I felt unsafe in the server and had to leave, which I appreciated.

A couple weeks later they reached out to me again and offered to broker a conversation between LR and myself because the situation wasn’t sitting well with them. I was skeptical (because I had been blocked at that point) and didn’t have a lot of hope that this conversation would actually take place but I felt a responsibility to try and be the bigger person and deal with what had been said head on, so I agreed to sit down and have a discussion with her as long as there was a third party in the chat as well—given our history.

After a couple weeks of back and forth with H and hearing that LR had said that she would “think about it”, she finally agreed. I was asked for a time and date and I gave my availability and was told she would be asked for the same. A couple days later, I was suddenly told LR would only be comfortable with this conversation if H acted as a “literal go-between” with us copy-pasting our responses in their DMs so we can “sit with the message and everyone can get to them when they can” rather than it being a session with an actual back and forth and was asked if I was okay with that. I honestly said no, because this was supposed to be a situation where she and I sat down and discussed what she said in the server, not a back and forth message relay where the conversation got dragged out for days or weeks or however long it was going to take. I said if she was serious about meeting me halfway on this, she needed to be able to sit down and actually talk.

H copy-pasted my response to LR and came back that she had backed out of the conversation, which part of me had expected from the beginning—even though all I wanted from this sit down was for her to understand how hurtful the antisemitic comments were and an apology.

These comments that were made in the server are not a secret. It’s pretty well known what was said and again, these were all on record, not privately made in some DM. She has still not owned up to the comments she said, nor has she ever apologized for them. She has ignored message after message about them and blocked more people than I can count. Many of the people defending her when the discourse begins have also been messaged about the comments she’s said and also either block people or ignore the messages completely and refuse to acknowledge them.

Now, this being said, in the most recent conversation about fandom racism, someone brought up the post that was made reducing users on ao3 to faceless, nameless numbers without saying who they were, what they had done, and how they were specifically contributing to the problem of racism in this fandom. They made the comparison of other situations like HR looking at pay stats to see how to fire and included “Nazis, capitalists, and colonizers.”

This is not an invalid argument. There have been other Jews in the fandom who specifically voiced feeling uncomfortable for the exact same reason. However, another person, LT, decided to specifically make a post calling the OP out and drag them for having the audacity to liken it to the Shoah (which, mind you, this person is not Jewish nor did they decide to capitalize Shoah or the Holocaust as they should have). She received a reply saying, “you’re offended by antisemitism? Here’s LR’s (someone LT has agreed with multiple times over racism in fandom) track record of antisemitic comments” which outlined everything I delved into previously.

LT said that they were “unaware of this incident until a couple days ago” but agreed that it was an upsetting display of casual dismissal of Jewish pain and hoped that LR had apologized. She was then called out for being aware of it and still continuing to reblog LR’s posts even after knowing about the comments and was linked to my post clarifying that LR had not apologized and refused a discussion about it, to which LT said that she had gotten “quite a different version outlined in the post linked and corroborated by a third party” and “felt uncomfortable” making a value judgement, insinuating that I was not being truthful about my side of the story.

I messaged LT off-anon and said that I was not lying nor over-exaggerating about what had happened in the server or about the following discussion about trying to broker a conversation with LR, and was immediately blocked by her. I am also not the only Jew who has sent her messages about this topic, only to have their messages ignored.

Now, am I surprised that I was immediately blocked after voicing my issues with what LT had said in that post? No.

She has a history of making antisemitic comments, most of which happened during the brunt of the Israel/Palestine discussion happening, which included statements such as “You cannot be considered indigenous if you hold a position of power”, that, despite having been displaced for 2,000 years, the Jewish diaspora was “integrated” into their respective communities (a wholly untrue statement), as well as linked to and promoted a website with extremely antisemitic articles including one about “Spartan Jews” and how Israeli Jews are violent to “send messages to their deprived self-esteem” that they won’t be victims again. Half of the comments on the site’s front page included such hits as “Death to all Jews” and “Wow, I had no idea this was happening—I guess it is true that Jews control the world and the mass media.” This website was repeated in multiple posts as “unbiased” and “a good resource” for other people to truly know what was going on.

Jewish dissent on the content of some posts and that website went unacknowledged and dismissed.

Being that LT is a relatively big user in the TOG fandom, her posts got circulated frequently. Seeing things like that touted as unbiased was extremely triggering for me and multiple Jews in this fandom that I’ve spoken to.

Now, the reason I made this post in particular was because I have seen a lot of echoing of the sentiment: “no matter how much you disagree with their sentiment, aligning yourself with racists is...well aligning yourself with racists.”

This statement NEEDS to become intersectional. If we are criticizing the work of people because of who they hold company with, why does that end at racism? If we are going to have a discussion about racism in this fandom, why are we letting it come from people who have openly said antisemitic things, people who have stood by them and supported them in silence, and people who have silenced Jewish voices speaking up about this issue.

These are not separate issues. This is a really good post regarding the white washing of Jews in social justice discussion and it comes full circle into the medical experimentation discussion. Jews were not seen as white during the Holocaust. The Nazis were trying to cleanse the Aryan race because they did not view Jews as white. They experimented on them because they did not view them as white and, thus, disposable.

Every Jewish diasporic community is still vulnerable. Even though the US has half the world’s Jews, over 50% of the religiously based hate crimes are consistently anti-Jewish even though Jews make up 2% of the population. Chinese Jews are still holding their holiday celebrations in secret due to government crackdowns. The attempted genocide of Beta Israel was less than 50 years ago. Across the Middle East and North Africa, Jewish communities are barely hanging on after centuries of attempted destruction. These are not just Jewish issues but racial issues as well because when people make the sweeping generalization of “Jew” and they only mean white-passing Ashkenazi Jews, it erases so much of our community.

I absolutely agree that this fandom needs to have a discussion about race and portrayal in fic and what we can do better moving forward—and I want to see that done—but we also need to acknowledge what so many people starting this discussion have said and the marginalized groups they have hurt along the way. I see these posts come across my dashboard and know exactly who they're coming from and what they think of people like me. If we are going to say, “No matter how much you disagree with their sentiment, aligning yourself with racists is aligning yourself with racists,” then we NEED to be saying, “If you are aligning yourself with antisemites, you’re aligning yourself with antisemites.”

We all need to move forward. But that means moving forward together. Jews included.

[inkskxtch]

Okay okay okay!! So I have a LOONG batim theory/idea I just wanna talk about for a bit since I’ve finally managed to organise my thoughts - I’ve seen it being discussed briefly by a few other people, but there’s one BIG detail people have been missing out that almost definitely connects and confirms the entire thing.

Spoilers for The Illusion Of Living!

-

So I’ll start from the start, where I first began thinking something was a little odd. In TIOL, Joey talks a bit about where he first met Sammy and Jack, when they were performing at an opening night party for a musical called Girl Crazy. Joey says he met them the night before his 30th birthday, which would mean the opening night was held in 1931 (since Joey was born in 1901).

WRONG! When I first read this part of the book I was curious to see if the musical was a real one, and it is! The thing that I didn’t understand though was that the musical was actually released in 1930, not 1931 like Joey says it was. I thought surely that was an error, right? NO IT WASNT!!! LET ME EXPLAIN!!!!!!!!!

(It also means that supposedly, Joey’s canon birthday is October 15th, because opening night for Girl Crazy was October 14th! But that’s not too important, and not a big part of the theory.)

The same night Joey meets Sammy & Jack, Sammy insists Joey takes them to see the studio and show them one of JDS’s short films. When he does, Sammy tells Joey he needs more female characters since at this point it’s only really Bendy, Boris, perhaps the Butcher Gang (though it might’ve been a bit early for them still), and random male one-time side characters.

Later in the autobiography, Joey talks more about how what Sammy said inspired him to create Alice Angel, after Henry had left so he had no input on the character and we can only really credit him for the creation of Bendy & Boris, despite what Joey says.

Now here’s where it gets fun!!! Sammy and Jack being hired in 1931 means they likely never met Henry, so Sammy’s whole “you look familiar to me!” line from Chapter 2’s ritual can only really be chalked up to Sammy being the one moving the cutouts and disappearing through the walls as usual throughout Chapter 1.

BUT!!!!!! BUT BUT BUT!!!!!!!!

A common theme throughout TIOL is that Joey is both an unreliable narrator AND a huge liar, so there’s a lot of information throughout the story that can be proven false pretty easily, like Henry not being the one behind Bendy etc. Since we know for sure that Sammy and Jack were hired in 1930 and not a year later, there’s a much higher chance they did have an opportunity to meet with Henry, and while I doubt Henry attended the opening night party, being the co-founder of the studio he definitely would’ve met them if they were employed while he was still working.

No doubt that upon meeting Henry, Sammy would’ve relayed his whole “not enough women” piece to him as the lead cartoonist. Henry definitely would’ve taken that criticism, and the two probably shared ideas around since she was going to be a very musical character, singing and whatnot.

BUT...there’s still more! What about Susie, you ask? I WILL EXPLAIN!!

When I tell y’all this franchise is ALL I think about im not kidding 😭

If we listen to Susie’s BATDR reveal tape, she says her and Sammy had been talking about a new character they were working on upstairs that she was most likely going to be given the role of. It’s pretty clear she’s talking about Alice Angel, since we know Susie was working as a voice actress for all kinds of random background characters before she got lucky with the role of Alice.

But wasn’t that audio log from Susie dated 1932, though? Wasn’t the original concept for Alice created around 1930? Yes and yes, sort of. Now this part is partially just a headcanon, but I do have something pretty definite to back me up here that I’ll get to soon. I reckon Henry designed Alice pretty early on in 1930 and Joey didn’t actually put the character to use until Henry was long gone, and Joey could take the character and make her more into what he would’ve wanted (and when he would’ve had a voice actress readily available).

Now here’s what I’m using to back myself up on that! In Dreams Come To Life, Norman says this and I’ll quote from the book:

Buddy: “He [Henry] created the big three, didn’t he?”

Norman: “Bendy and Boris. Even Alice, though they didn’t start featuring her until after Henry left.”

So my idea is pretty much correct, that while Alice was designed and given a basic character concept pretty early on while Henry still worked at the studio, she wasn’t shown in comics or cartoons until after Henry had left. I also hold the firm belief that in Henry’s hidden tape in Chapter 3, where he talks about how he’s working on a new character he thinks people are going to love, I definitely think he’s talking about Alice. Otherwise, why would it be found in the chapter focused around introducing her as a villain?

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There’s not really a big end to this theory, but I just thought it’d be worth bringing it up to tie up any loose ends and conclude that Henry is almost definitely responsible for all 3 of the original characters, including Alice.

Joey is a big liar and so so dumb but by god did I enjoy how he was written, and TIOL as a whole

[vannahfanfics]

Heavenly Bodies

Category: Romantic Fluff

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Characters: Mina Ashido, Eijirou Kirishima

Additional Tags: Quirkless AU

Howdy, everyone! Today I have my story for the @ashidobigbang! I had the privilege of working with the wonderful @mallowfac​, so be sure to go give her beautiful art some love!

The picturesque campus of U.A. High School was always abuzz with activity, even after the final bells rang to mark the end of the school day. As expected of the number-one high school in the district, the institution hosted a vast number of after-school sports and clubs, so much that it was almost unheard of for a student to be uninvolved in anything. Thus, even as the sun had sunk low across the sky, the halls were still packed with many students fervently discussing events and fundraising and planning, walking to and from their classrooms. 

The exterior of the school was no exception; one would be hard pressed to find an empty sidewalk or field—except for today, when the American football team would be taking on the baseball team in an impromptu flag football game to determine once and for all the title of best sport. The halls and sidewalks and fields were abandoned, for the entire student body had crammed themselves within the confines of the spacious practice field nestled in the back corner of the campus. The baseball team had asserted that football was so easy that even they could do it, and the school had become divided on whether or not that was true. 

“Kick their asses, Eijirou!” a particularly loud fan crowed from the top of the bleachers. He was standing tall, hands cupped around his mouth and stamping his feet as he cheered for the school’s idol and star quarterback. The bleachers sang with chants and stomps, trying desperately to smother the boos drifting from the opposite end of the field, where the baseball team’s supporters sat. Eijirou Kirishima, his grin blinding and his red hair gleaming in the spring sun, laughed nervously as praise was rained down upon him. 

As Mina zeroed in on him in the lens of her binoculars, she knew she’d found her latest victim— er, recruit. 

Mina Ashido was the president—and only member—of U.A.’s astronomy club. Well, it wasn’t technically a club yet since they needed two members for the administration to approve the application. An avid admirer of all things cosmological and an aspiring astronomer, Mina refused to allow her pride and joy to collapse before it had even begun. Thus, for the last few months, she’d been concocting hare-brained scheme after hare-brained scheme to recruit at least one more member and officially christen the U.A. Guild of Astronomers and Astrophysicists. All of her efforts, unfortunately, had crashed and burned brighter than a supernova. 

At first, she’d just camped out in the hallways and leisure areas pitching her case and attempting to garner interest in the subject, but she’d been met with polite refusals or awkward avoidance. With so many extracurriculars available, sometimes drastic measures had to be taken to garner interest in a club— the Shakespearean drama club, for example, had performed Macbeth completely backwards in the courtyard, and their numbers had swelled immediately. Mina had cooked up a dramatic scheme of her own, which involved her running around the school screaming about a falling star and the end times. After inciting a mass school panic that led to a lockdown and police involvement, all Mina had managed to acquire was a fierce scolding, detention, and the label as a kook—not even one person expressed interest in joining her club even for the shits and giggles! No, it was clear that the inner workings of her mind were too sophisticated for humble high school students and staff, so she would have to try a more nuanced approach—manipulating the most vital high school variable: popularity. 

Her first target had been gorgeous cheerleader and school sweetheart, Momo Yaoyorozu. Despite the stereotype that popular girls were great big bitches, Momo had been nothing but polite when refusing Mina, since her rigorous practice schedule would unfortunately not allow her to devote the time to the club it deserved (but they did regularly meet up for Sunday tea now!). The next one to fall into her crosshairs was the school heartthrob Shoto Todoroki. He’d entertained her for an afternoon, but he destroyed one of her very expensive telescopes while attempting a night viewing and she’d politely informed him that perhaps he wasn’t cut out for it. He didn’t seem too sad about it, though he did occasionally ask her how the recruiting was going when they met in the halls. Very sweet guy, but bless him, he was an airhead. 

Thus, Mina had moved on to her next opportunity—the pride and joy of U.A.’s sports program, star American football player Eijirou Kirishima. Incredibly handsome, charismatic, and kind-hearted, Eijirou was beloved by everyone at U.A. If Mina managed to recruit him to her humble club, half the student body would be clamoring to join before it was printed in the school news the next day. 

She snickered to herself as she watched him through her binoculars, hiding in the thick, leafy bushes lining the backside of the sports complex. Her cotton candy-colored hair blended well with the hydrangeas blooming amidst the emerald leaves, camouflaging her as she conducted her vital research. The redhead strode across the field with confidence, yet his sunny smile made him seem anything but arrogant. Though she couldn’t hear him, she could see his lips moving as he relayed orders to his team while they set up the play. The players seamlessly fell into an offensive stance, a testament to the faith they held in their captain—and how seriously he took their practice and performance. 

A deep and bassy “huuuuup!” resounded through the field, and then the player hiked the ball. With a speed much at odds with his muscular frame, Eijirou took off down the field. Mina admittedly salivated a little as she watched his muscles ripple, his gray muscle tank displaying his biceps and triceps in mouthwatering detail. She could see the sweat shining on his skin and flicking from his hair as he whipped his head around to eye the ball that was sailing through the air toward him. The baseball team’s defense could only watch in awe as Eijirou leaped into the air over the endzone. The ball landed in his arms like it belonged there, his grip smug and sure as he landed in the touchdown zone. The supporting crowd erupted into deafening cheers, while Eijirou just smiled bashfully and gave a little wave. 

Mina lowered her binoculars to compose herself, a blush dusting her cheeks. So effortless… And the crowd loves it! she thought in awe. No matter what, I have to get him to join the Astronomy Club! She snapped the binoculars back to her eyes, watching intensely. She really didn’t need to watch the entire game, but… damn, that was a mouthwatering piece of man. She had to find some way to entertain herself while she waited for the game to end and her chance to corner him to finally present itself. 

Needless to say, the football team absolutely demolished the baseball team. The rival players marched back to their diamond in defeat along with their gaggle of supporters, while the crowd flooded the practice field to heft a very bemused but giddy Eijirou on their shoulders with chants of his name. They dunked the container of water over his head as soon as his feet touched the grass again, making him laugh jovially. Mina’s heart fluttered at the sound; his laugh was as sunny as the rest of him, so bright she almost felt the need to close her eyes. He was just blinding, like the most intense star. 

And just like with a star, Mina gravitated toward him. 

Eventually, the raucous crowd dispersed and the football team started heading to the locker rooms to change out of their sweaty gym gear. They came tromping onto the sidewalk, with Eijirou trailing in the rear dripping wet and trying to wring water out of his tank. Mina almost forgot to spring out of the bushes, too occupied with the planes of his abs being revealed each time he wrung the fabric. She remembered her mission just as he passed the hydrangea bush, and leaped out in front of him with a delighted trill. 

“That was a wonderful game, Eijirou!” she squealed, throwing her arms up and hiking up one leg behind her in a cute little flourish. The redhead jumped back with a small gasp, startled by her sudden appearance and the leaves and hydrangea petals clinging to her clothes and the soft fibers of her pink hair. Once he recovered, however, he gave her a charming smile that nearly had her melting into a pile of space slush. 

“Oh! Thanks. Hey, you’re, uh—” he snapped his fingers quickly as he struggled to recall her, then pointed his fingers at her in a gun-like shape once it clicked, “Mina Ashido! You have homeroom with Tsuyu from the Amphibian Care club. She talks about you when she helps run the concession stand sometimes!” 

“That’s right! The one and only!” she chirped, trying to suppress the surge of anger at the fact that Tsuyu could recruit for her club about pet frogs and turtles but Mina couldn’t get one single underling. Not to worry; that will all change soon! 

“This might be an odd question, but, uh… is there a reason you were hiding in the bushes?” he laughed awkwardly. Mina blushed when he leaned forward to gently brush the leaves and petals from her shoulders and hair, which made her short-circuit for a second. It was only when he looked at her inquisitively that her brain jump-started again. 

“O-oh! I thought it would be fun to surprise you! Yanno, like in the movies where someone jumps out of a big ol’ birthday cake!” It was a bold-faced lie, but it wasn’t like she could tell him she was spying on him through binoculars while she schemed to reel him into her club. Trying to keep him from thinking too hard about it, she placed her hands on her hips and straightened up. “I watched your practice match with the baseball team and have decided that you’ll be a perfect fit for the Astronomy Club! So please join. <3” 

Eijirou blinked owlishly at her, his bright red eyes swimming with confusion. He smiled bashfully, clearly trying not to let his utter perplexity show on his face. He rubbed the back of his neck with a nervous chuckle. 

“Well, um, I’m really not sure how you made that connection watching me play…” 

“The inner workings of a woman’s mind are quite an enigma~” she hummed with a waggle of her finger. Eijirou only scrunched his eyebrows in confusion and jumped when she slapped her hand down on his shoulder. “Seriously! You seem like a great fit! Please consider at least trying it out for a little while?” She batted her eyelashes demurely; if nothing else, her womanly charms could entice the burly football player to at least humor her for a while. 

Sure enough, a pink blush dusted across his cheeks and a bashful smile curled onto his lips. 

“Well, I suppose it wouldn’t hurt checking it out… Stars are cool…” 

“Fabulous!” she squealed, making Eijirou flinch again as she clapped her hands together and jumped up and down in elation. Even if Eijirou didn’t join permanently, just the rumor of his interest in her humble little club was liable to attract attention. “I know that you’re busy with football practice, so we’ll schedule club meetings on Friday afternoons when you don’t have them, okay?” 

“Oh, that’s not necessary. I don’t want to inconvenience any—” 

“Great! So it’s settled then! I’ll see you on Friday afternoon in Room 310!” With that, she jumped back into her bush, leaving Eijirou staring at the quivering leaves in confusion. Through the gaps in the branches, she saw him open and close his mouth like he wanted to say something, look around and then up at the sky with a pensive look, and then smile with a shrug of his shoulders. Mina clutched her binoculars to her chest as a smile bloomed on her own lips, but one of satisfaction. Surely this will work! The Astronomy Club will be booming in no time! She thought with a giddy snicker. 

If nothing else, she could look at Eijirou’s absolutely dreamy body and face for a few club meetings and drive his fangirls nuts. 

At the end of the week, Mina paced impatiently in front of Room 310, chewing her fingernails to nubs as her eyes darted back and forth around the hall. It had only been a few minutes since the final bell had rung and the students had scattered to attend to their Friday afternoon obligations (or lack thereof), but anxiety swirled in Mina’s belly at the complete emptiness of the halls. Has he stood me up? Was I too pushy? Is he secretly a great big jerk who is nice to people’s faces but scathingly berates them behind their back to his football teammates and they all laugh evilly at the unknowing victim’s expense? 

With a dramatic sob, Mina flung herself against the classroom door and hugged it, her fingers just barely curling around the wide frame. Once again, it seemed that her recruitment plan had failed miserably, and she was still the sole member of the Astronomy Club. Was she a doomed stranded astronaut, left to traverse the stars in silence awaiting a bitter end? She sank to her knees, sliding down the door with a long squeeeeeeeeak and crying bitter tears. Stars were hella cool! Why did no one at this stupid high school appreciate them? 

“Mina!” 

Mina’s mood did a complete one-eighty when she heard Eijirou calling her name and his footsteps pounding around the corner. She jumped to her feet, her tears drying up instantly and her pout morphing into a giddy smile. The redhead came trotting up, a thin sheet of sweat on his forehead and an apologetic smile on his face. 

“Sorry!” he panted. “I didn’t get a chance to warn you that my class is all the way on the first floor. I hope you weren’t waiting long!” 

“No, no! I just got here mys— yeowch!” 

She had still been hugging the door, so when she tried to turn to face him, she accidentally pulled it forward and smashed her fingers in the doorjamb. She screamed as her knucklebones crunched and the skin tore; the pain rocketing up her arm sprang tears to her eyes immediately, and she released a petulant whine as she retracted her bruised and bloody fingers from between the wooden door and concrete wall. 

“Oh my gosh, are you okay, Mina?” Eijirou gasped, dropping his school bag and rushing to her side. Mina cradled her throbbing hand to her chest with little sniffles, curling away from the football player when he reached for it. He gave her an encouraging, sweet smile. “I know I look big and tough, but I promise, I can be gentle too. Let me see; you may have broken something.”

Whimpering but enticed by his soothing words and demeanor, Mina obediently allowed him to pull her hand forward to inspect her fingers. They were bruising already, big blotches of purple blooming around the torn and bloody skin. Eijirou leaned over her hand, and goosebumps sprouted on her skin as his warm breath puffed over her electrified skin and aching bones. With featherlight touches, he inspected her knuckles, prodding as gently as he could to feel for any deviations in the bone. 

“I know this may hurt, but can you bend them?” he asked, looking up at her through his red bangs. Mina whimpered again, hesitant to comply for fear of the pain. However, the glitter in his vermilion eyes urged her to comply. She hesitantly bent her fingers, wincing as pain skittered up her nerves— but it didn’t hurt nearly as much as she thought it would. Eijirou smiled satisfactorily. “You crunched ‘em pretty good, but I don’t think anything is broken or fractured,” he said as he straightened up. 

“Thanks… I can’t believe I did that,” she sighed, using her good hand to knock on the side of her head a few times. How embarrassing, injuring herself like that in front of him! “Well, now that all that drama is over, let’s go inside so I can tell you about the club.” 

Eijirou followed her inside. While she rifled through the teacher’s desk for some bandages, he looked around at the desks, which were empty aside from a build-your-own-telescope kit, Mina’s completed telescope, and astronomical charts and textbooks. As Mina wrapped bandages around her fingers, he looked at her with knitted eyebrows. 

“There’s no one else here yet?” 

“There’s no one else to be here,” she replied with a shrug and a wan smile. “I’m the club’s only member.” When Eijirou’s eyebrows shot up to the roots of his hair, she sadly added, “If that information makes you want to leave, go ahead and do so,” she said with a wave at the door. She then looked down at the adhesive wrapped around her knuckles. “You wouldn’t be the first.” 

“No, I don’t want to leave,” Eijirou said quickly. He marched up to the front of the desk, leaning against it. Mina didn’t know what to look at—his flexing muscles or his bright smile. He tilted his head slightly as he smiled charmingly at her, then said, “Tell me about your club, Mina. I want to know everything.” 

Oh God, he’s hot! Mina screamed inside her head, her good hand flying to her rapidly-beating heart. It took everything within her not to absolutely swoon at the complete sweetheart of a man gracing her with his presence this Friday afternoon. Her eyes watered a little in gratitude, or maybe it was the sheer emotion at being witness to such a wonderful human being’s kindness. 

Thus, Mina did as he asked. She first instructed Eijirou how to build the telescope that he would use on nights they did observations; he bungled through it a little, but remained patient and tried his best to follow the instructions. Mina had to giggle at the absolutely triumphant grin that plastered his face when he successfully assembled the telescope; he held it up over his head and pranced around—nearly giving them both a panic attack when he bumped into a desk and nearly dropped the telescope on the ground. Mina didn’t think she could handle a Shoto 2.0. 

After assembling the telescope, she started him off with easy information—constellations. She unrolled her star map which had all the constellations displayed by season, explaining specifically which ones they could see at the moment. Eijirou was very excited to see them in person, so they arranged a meeting for the following week. True to form, he showed up that Friday night with his telescope and all his zeal, his smile brighter than the full moon hanging high in the sky. 

“It’s hard to believe that people stared at the sky thousands of years ago and traced shapes out of ‘em!” he exclaimed as he plonked his telescope down to the ground. “And made up all these stories to go with ‘em. And all the stories and constellations are different based on what civilization was lookin’ at ‘em!” 

“The stars have always been fascinating,” Mina hummed, gently setting up her telescope and adjusting the lens. “Sometimes I like to find my own constellations and make up stories about them.” 

“Really? Tell me one!” 

“Well, my favorite is the Alien Queen!” 

“The Alien Queen?” Eijirou laughed, making Mina flush shyly. “Show me!” Not waiting for an answer, he shouldered in next to her telescope and peered into it. She flushed darker as his sturdy shoulder dug into the meat of her side, warmth blooming across her skin. With slightly trembling hands, she moved the telescope to the right section of the sky. 

“Do you see that big, bright shiny star right there?” she asked, waiting until Eijirou confirmed. “Well, that’s the tip of the back of her head. If you follow them like this—” she gestated in front of the lens, tracing the star pattern— “it looks kinda like the alien from the horror movie!” 

“Leave it to Mina Ashido to find the Xenomorph constellation,” Eijirou snickered, straightening up to smile at her in amusement. “No wonder you’re the club president.” Mina shyly played with the hem of her skirt, unable to control the giddy smile playing over her lips. 

They spent the rest of the early evening finding the constellations and discussing the various mythologies behind each. Eijirou loved the Greek-based patterns and myths the most. Every time they pointed one out, he would flex dramatically and proclaim how much he loved the famous heroes of old—Hercules, Achilles, Odysseus, Perseus. Mina laughed at his sensational flexing and grunting each time, her giggles bouncing around the empty practice field to join the cricket song. 

Monday morning, Mina was surprised to find Eijirou rushing down the hall towards her as she went to enter her classroom. His face was flushed pink and his forehead dotted with sweat, indicating that he’d sprinted all the way to her. He pin-wheeled to a stop, nearly bumping her with his broad chest, and his breath puffed in her hair as he grinned brightly down at her. 

“Mina! Guess what I saw on the news this morning! The Creati comet is gonna be passing by this Wednesday, and it’ll be visible here that night!” 

“Yeah, I know!” Mina cried. She’d been glued to the news program this morning as astrophysicists and space program officials discussed the once-in-a-lifetime event; it was rumored to be an absolute gorgeous comet, with a rare rosy pink-lavender tail due to its high concentrations of lithium and potassium chloride. She then blushed, warmed by the fact that Eijirou had found it so important to inform her that he’d run all the way across campus first thing in the morning. 

“Yeah! We’re gonna watch it together, right?” he asked, clapping his hands on her shoulders. Mina flushed, fidgeting in place and chewing on the inside of her cheek. 

“A-are you sure? I’m sure you’ll be tired after football practice.” 

“Are you kidding? What kind of Astronomy Club member would I be if I didn’t see this comet?” he objected. 

Mina felt her heart thrum at the statement. Does he enjoy being a member that much? She’d only recruited him as a means to an end, but was it really turning out that Eijirou liked being a member of her club? She felt her belly twist with guilt and a cold flush pulse through her body. She curled into herself a little, blood roaring in her ears and nearly drowning out what he said next. 

“I know you’re planning on going to watch it, so let’s see it together, Mina!” 

“Okay,” she found herself saying before she even processed it. The next two days were a similar blur of guilt and anxiety amidst preparations to view the comet Wednesday evening. All traces of excitement she would normally possess was swallowed up by the remorse poisoning her from the hard ball in the pit of her belly. She couldn’t help but obsess over the fact that she’d recruited Eijirou on false pretenses, abusing his kind heart to use his popularity for her own gain. She’d already received a flood of interest in the club once news had spread that Eijirou was seemingly an official member, but she’d evaded them with half-hearted promises that she’d contact them soon to set up a general interest meeting. 

On Wednesday night she stood by the hydrangea bush, chewing on her bottom lip and tempted to hide within its emerald leaves and pink blossoms so she wouldn’t have to face Eijirou. Before she could take shelter in its branchy depths, the redhead came trotting up the sidewalk, his smile gleaming in the starlight as he called her name. His telescope flopped on his back in its canvas sheath. 

“Hey, Mina!” he grinned when he came to a stop in front of her, panting slightly. Always in such a rush, she thought fondly. No wonder he’s the star quarterback. “Are you excited? I sure am!” 

“Yeah,” she lied. There was no room to be excited with all the guilt filling her to the brim. Eijirou’s smile somehow managed to get brighter. Despite everything, her heart still jumped in her chest when he grabbed her hand, his thick and calloused fingers so strangely perfect around her slim ones, and pulled her onto the practice field. 

“This is perfect!” he exclaimed, looking up at the starry night sky with his hands on his hips. Mina only hummed quietly, robotically unfolding a blanket and placing it over the grass. She’d arranged for the school to shut off the nighttime lights for the evening, giving them a clear view of the moon and stars. Thus, they were the only things that provided illumination as Mina and Eijirou sat down on the soft blanket together. “I didn’t know if we would want to get a better look at the comet, so I brought this!” he said excitedly, slipping the telescope off his back and setting it down between them. Mina hummed again, anxiety swirling in the pit of her belly. In the gloom, she could still see Eijirou’s bright red eyebrows scrunch. 

“Mina…? What’s wrong?” he asked quietly. Mina debated lying for a moment; she nervously plucked at the loose fibers of her stockings, unable to meet his pretty vermillion eyes. The lie never got the chance to dance on her tongue. She knew she had to come clean, to tell him the truth before she toted him along even further. 

“Eijirou… I have to confess something,” she admitted quietly. He shifted beside her, eyebrows raised. 

“What is it?” 

“I’m not as good a person as you think I am.” Her voice shook as tears flooded her eyes. She bit down on her lip as a sniffle slipped free. Eijirou looked at her in utter bewilderment, confusion swirling in those gorgeous vermillion eyes that had struck her the moment she had first seen them. He gently reached out to stroke his fingertips ever-so-lightly down her cheek; she turned away, a tear slipping down her cheek that was still tingling with his featherlight touch. “Don’t,” she begged, her voice nothing more than a strained whisper. “I don’t deserve your sympathy.” 

“Mina…” 

“I used you, Eijirou,” she said finally, choking the words out as her throat constricted with guilt. “I used your popularity for my own gain. I just wanted my club to be popular.” 

She didn’t look at him as the silence hung heavy between them, like an anvil suspended on a slowly fraying rope. She waited with bated breath for the rope to snap and for it to plummet, for him to explode on her like he rightfully should, to tell her she was selfish and cruel and for him to storm away and never look back. She cringed when he inhaled sharply, already preparing for his raised voice. 

He didn’t yell or scream or curse. Instead, his voice was heartbreakingly soft when he murmured, “That doesn’t make you a bad person. That just makes you lonely.” 

Mina’s eyes fluttered as her heart swelled with hope. She didn’t resist when he cupped her cheek and gently turned her tear-stained face to look at him. Her watery eyes met his red ones, and she was so relieved to find them brimming with understanding, not hate or anger. He swept his thumb over her cheek to catch the tears still streaming over her ruddy skin. 

“Mina… I knew that already,” he confessed with a small smile. She gasped in shock, while Eijirou smiled bashfully and rubbed at the back of his neck with his other hand. “As soon as you told me that you were the only member of the club, I figured that you wanted to use my popularity to recruit more people. I was a little bitter about it for a second, but… Then I saw how sad you looked.” He used both his hands to cup her cheeks and leaned forward to press his forehead to hers. “I didn’t want to see that look on your face. Even if you were using me, I wanted you to be happy.” 

“Why?” she hiccuped, chest drawing tight like a balloon ready to burst. “Th-that was so horrible of me… And you still wanted to do that for me? Why?” 

“Because from the moment you jumped out of that hydrangea bush, I’ve been head-over-heels for you,” he purred, mouth twitching up into a smirk. Her face flushed with a fierce, fiery blush and her mouth dropped open in shock. “And maybe I was a little hopeful that I could get you to be head-over-heels for me, too,” he added with a playful wink. Mina couldn’t help but laugh, mostly from the overwhelming relief bubbling up inside her body. She leaned into him, finding solace in how well her small body fit into his muscular one—like a lock and key, like they belonged together. 

Sniffling happily, she curled her fingers into the leathery fabric of his varsity jacket and smiled joyfully. 

“Well, you didn’t have to try very hard. How could I not be head-over-heels for you?”

Before they could say anything else, the sky was suddenly filled with bright light. They both turned to see that the comet had appeared among the stars. Its powdery tail streamed pinkish-blue behind the large white body, slowly traveling across the expanse of inky blue like a leisurely sailboat. Mina inhaled sharply as the pastel colors reflected in her eyes and the light danced over her skin and hair; it truly was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen. She was so entranced that she didn’t register Eijirou’s hand sneaking under her chin again until he turned her face back. The comet danced in his red eyes, making it a pink nebula of stars and space and beauty. 

No. Those eyes of his were the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen. 

She almost didn’t want to close her own as he leaned in to kiss her, but as soon as his lips smoothed over her own, she couldn’t help it. They drifted shut as she melted against him, savoring the gentle motions of his mouth against hers. Her heart fluttered when his hand drifted up into her cotton-candy hair, twirling around the strands like he was memorizing the feel of the silky threads. He kissed her with rising passion, like an astronaut adrift in space who’d finally found the oxygen he needed. 

They pulled apart slightly panting and blushing the same color as the comet streaming slowly above their heads. He stroked her face gently, then wrapped his arms around her and pulled her down on the blanket. She laughed when he hugged her tight, nuzzled into her hair and inhaled deeply. 

“You smell like hydrangeas.” 

“Eijirou, I thought we were here to watch the comet.” 

“It’s pretty,” he remarked with a glance up at the sky. He then looked down at her with that dazzling smile she adored so much. “But I’ve got a heavenly body right here that I’m more interested in.” 

“Oh my gosh! That’s so corny!” she howled, throwing her head back in laughter. Eijirou snickered and snuggled into the side of her face, making her laugh more at the ticklish sensation of his nose brushing her skin. He peppered butterfly kisses over every inch of skin he could find, making her squirm and giggle in his grasp. 

Finally, he rolled on his side, one arm still snug around her shoulders while he watched the comet slowly make its way across the horizon. She pressed against him, warm and fuzzy and happy. 

“You know, despite the circumstances, I’m still glad you asked me to join, Mina,” Eijirou said with a contented sigh. His fingers drifted up to play with the fluffy strands of her hair. Mina rested her head on his chest, smiling while she watched the comet. 

“Me too, Eijirou. I can’t wait to spend the rest of the school year checking out heavenly bodies.” 

Eijirou gave her a wan look as she snorted piggishly in laughter. 

“You’re not going to let me live that down, are you?” 

“Absolutely not. I’m already planning to sell tee shirts!” 

Eijirou laughed, then rolled over to attack her with snuggles and kisses again. Mina welcomed his embrace and affections. Their laughter drifted up into the sky to join the stars and the streaming glittery trail of the comet, finding a home forever in the vastness of space…

Enjoy this oneshot? Feel free to peruse my Table of Contents!

[wildwoodgoddess]

Holmes At Girton--A Mini-fic of Miss Holmes' First Case, The Glorious Scot

(This is an ongoing series about the historical case for how canon Sherlock Holmes and John Watson could have been women. It is leading up to the launch of my new web novel series on Patreon, Ladies of Baker Street—a sapphic/wlw, Victorian women adaptation of Sherlock Holmes.

As usual, I’m using the hashtag #A Study In Victorian Women for this series, if you want to follow along. If this interests you, please follow me as well as comment on/like/share this post. Thanks!)

Continuing from my last post about how a woman Sherlock Holmes could have gotten a university education in the 1870’s, I thought I’d do something a little different this time.

As a welcome gift for my newsletter subscribers, I wrote a short novella that’s my version of The Gloria Scott, which is canon Sherlock Holmes’ first case. The original story is set when Holmes is a university student. During a holiday break from classes, he goes home with his friend Victor Trevor, and during his visit, he uncovers an uncomfortable mystery involving Victor’s father.

My version of this is The Glorious Scot, and today I’m sharing an excerpt from it with you all. It’s set during Sherlyn Holmes’ and Dr. Siân Watson’s early days together, after they’ve been living at 221B Baker Street about 2 months. They are in the middle of the case that I will be detailing in A Study in Garnet (via Patreon), and Watson has encouraged Holmes to take this other side case as a distraction from the main case. Holmes quickly solves the side case, but it brings up some bad memories for her. Watson wants to know what happened, and Holmes brings out a painting, The Glorious Scot, and tells Watson the story of it.

The excerpt begins after Holmes has shown Watson the painting, and it focuses on Holmes’ life at Girton and her first meeting of Victoria Trevor. It’s told from Watson’s point of view as she relays Holmes’ story to us. There is a brief section I cut for the sake of keeping the post a bit shorter. That is shown by […]. Hope you enjoy!

*****

“Did you know that I, too, attended university?” Holmes asked. Her lips twisted scornfully. “Or at least the milquetoast substitute offered to women in this country.”

The change of subject startled me. “I believe you may have mentioned it, yes.”

“I matriculated at Girton College in 1873.”

“Cambridge!” I sat forward, gripping the edge of the box holding the painting. “Now that is something you didn’t tell me before.”

“Not truly Cambridge, you know. I believe it is officially termed ‘a recognized institution for the higher education of women.’” She sneered. “’Cambridge’s unacknowledged bastard child’ would be a more accurate description. Girton students may now sit the Tripos examinations, but they are awarded no degrees and are not considered Cambridge students.”

I felt the bitter sting of it all in my own heart, but I summoned my most jovial tone. “Change is coming, Holmes. Look at the strides we’ve made just in the past twenty years!”

She wasn’t cheered. “Strides should not have to be made.” She leaned over her chair to reach for the coal scuttle where she—for reasons I could not fathom—kept a tin of chocolate-covered coffee beans. She opened the tin and offered me a bean. I took one, and she took three and then settled the tin on her lap. “Equality for women need not take time, except for the resistance of men.”

“Agreed.” A question came to me. “Why did you not go abroad for university? Zurich, as I did, or even America?”

Holmes grimaced. “Mycroft achieved senior wrangler at Cambridge, and at the time, it was my dearest wish to follow in his footsteps as nearly as was possible for me.”

The tightness in her voice reminded me that we were supposed to be discussing the reason for the breach between Holmes and her brother. “You were very close to him back then?”

She lifted one shoulder. “I’m not sure how close one can be to a brother who is seven years the elder. But Mycroft was generally kind to me, and I admired him far more than, on retrospect, I ought to have done. I foolishly created an ideal of him in my mind—a youthful mistake that I shall be careful never to replicate.”

Her words brought back memories of my own childhood adulation of my elder sisters; and for a moment, my throat tightened, and I could not reply.

“I passed the entrance examinations in 1872,” she continued, “but the college, which had originally been located in Hitchens, was nearing completion of larger and nicer facilities in Girton the following year. So Father convinced me to wait until 1873 to matriculate. There were fifteen of us in that class.”

“Were you reading for a Tripos?”

“Mathematics, of course,” she said. “Girton was quite adamant about that. But my real interest was chemistry, so I was also reading for the Natural Sciences Tripos.”

If Holmes had sat a Tripos exam, I would have heard of it. It was my understanding that there had been a few Girton students early on who sat the exams unofficially. […]

“You are wondering why I did not sit the exams.” Holmes’s voice was brittle, and she was uncharacteristically avoiding my gaze.

“They are known to be among the most grueling of endeavors, but you would have excelled—of that I am certain.”

“My excitement about attending university was boundless. But the reality was far more frustrating than I’d imagined. My fellow students were immensely clever, but most hadn’t had the necessary amount of education to allow them to keep pace with our male counterparts. And the lectures we had access to—both at Girton and at Cambridge—were disappointingly limited. I studied everything I could in math, Latin, Greek, and chemistry. But I felt terribly constrained.”

I could well understand her aggrievement. It had been the same for me both in medical school and in subsequent training. I had never felt as intellectually free as I had at Netley disguised as a man, and it was infuriating.

She ate another three chocolate-covered coffee beans and offered me the tin. I shook my head. Coffee beans were not a treat I could enjoy in abundance, but Holmes grazed on them like a horse on grass.

She wrapped her long, slim fingers around the tin and tapped it absently while she continued her tale. “It has always been difficult for me to remember that most people mistake impatience for arrogance. The other students thought my unhappiness with my studies revealed a disdain for my classmates—as if I believed myself superior to them because I wanted to proceed at a quicker pace. I found myself quite isolated by the end of my first year there.”

“I am sorry.”

Her mouth flattened into a self-deprecating frown. “The fault was my own. I’ve learned to be better at social graces—I can be quite charming, you know, when I determine to be so. But at the time, I was more interested in expressing my dissatisfaction than I was in cultivating friends.”

I had grown used to Holmes’s cutting insights into other people, but her capacity for ruthless self-assessment never failed to astonish me. “It’s difficult to accept the errors our younger selves made when they have such far-reaching consequences.”

“Indeed.” Her eyes fell on The Glorious Scot still in its box on my lap. “But you are wondering what this all has to do with that painting.”

“It may have crossed my mind,” I admitted.

She laughed a little. “Watson, you must feel free to set my story back on the rails if I have gone off. Don’t be delicate about it.”

I grinned. “Very well. Get on with it. What about the painting?”

“Well, you see, I did find one friend at Girton. She was the same year as I, but she was even less inclined toward friendships than I was, so we barely spoke that first year.”

“I thought you were wanting to be put back on the rails to talk about the painting.” I winked at her to show I was only jesting.

She arced an eyebrow. “Do try to have at least some patience and not ruin a story with constant interruption.” But her gray eyes twinkled.

“My most abject apologies. Please continue.”

With a triumphant look, she popped another coffee bean into her mouth. “I was out walking one morning, and I came across a woman’s backside protruding from under some bushes. She was murmuring something, and as it was a very elegant backside in danger of becoming snagged by the branches, I came closer to see if she was in need of assistance.”

“How chivalrous of you, Holmes,” I murmured, trying not to smile.

“I asked her if she was all right, and she replied, ‘I’m quite fine, thank you, but there’s an injured kitten tangled up in here.’

I thought it rather charming that she was so concerned about the kitten’s welfare, so I hunched down next to her. ‘May I help?’

‘Perhaps if you can go around to the other side of the hedge,’ came the response. ‘Some boys were tormenting it, and they tied sticks and other rubbish to its tail. Now the string is all snarled, and I’m worried the poor thing will injure itself further trying to claw free.’

So I circled around to the opposite side and peered under the hedge. Now I could hear the kitten mewling, and I saw the face that went with the backside. It was my classmate, Victoria Trevor.

When she saw me as well, she looked shocked. ‘Holmes! I didn’t think you cared much for animals.’

‘What an inaccurate assumption to make, from barely any evidence.’ I crawled further into the hedge. ‘I will hold it while you slip its tail free.’

‘I didn’t mean to be unkind,’ she said, now lying on her side while I reached for the kitten. ‘My apologies.’

‘I said nothing about unkind. Merely that your deduction was baseless.’

Once I was able to keep the kitten still, she quickly freed it from its tangles. We met again on the other side of the hedge, and I gave her the kitten.

‘Again, I apologize for my rudeness earlier. I appreciate your help.’

‘Think nothing of it,’ I assured her. ‘What will you do with that?’ I nodded at the kitten.

She held it close to her, and her eyes glowed with mischief. ‘Take it back to my room.’

‘And how will you hide the presence of a cat? It will need a box of sand, you know, as well as food and water. And it’s injured.’

‘It’s absurd that we aren’t allowed pets. Many of the Cambridge students keep animals.’

‘Well, I shan’t turn you in, of course, only it would be too bad if you’ve gone through all this trouble only to have someone put the cat out on the street again.’

‘I think there’s a sixty-three percent chance of getting away with it. I’ll accept the risk,’ she said.

I walked her back to her room and helped her smuggle in the kitten. And then I stayed, and we talked, and by the time I left, we were friends.”

“What became of the kitten?” I asked.

“She managed to keep it hidden for five days before it was discovered. By this time, though, she’d already convinced a woman in the village to take the kitten, with the promise that she could visit from time to time to play with it.”

“And now you had a friend,” I prompted her.

“Victoria was…” Holmes sighed, suddenly looking weary. “I don’t think ‘friend’ can fully capture it. We were inseparable. Obsessively so, really. I called her ‘Janie’—after her middle name, Jane. And she called me ‘Freddy’—a teasing reference to my Christian name, which, if you recall, is Winifred. There was a like-mindedness between us, as if we had known each other our entire lives and had just forgotten until that moment at the hedge.”

I shifted in my chair, my heart clenching for reasons I didn’t understand. “That must have been thrilling for you.”

******

If you want to read the full story, you can join my newsletter and download it from BookFunnel.

Next time, I’ll be posting about the “New Woman” movement and how Holmes and Watson would fit into it. Cheers!