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ageofevermore · 4 years

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The Sun Met The Moon

SUMMARY — and finally the sun and the moon met, and they fell madly in love

WORD COUNT — 2.5k

NOTE — part three to part one + part two

───── ･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ: *. ☽ .* : ☆ﾟ. ─────

alex’s drums:

Sweat clung to his brow and shone in the golden light of midday. She smiled at the sight of him, stripped of all awareness and singled in on the task at hand. He had Alex’s drumsticks between his fingers, and a black ballpoint pen between his teeth. She watched him for a while, tracing the flex of his biceps every time he beat at the mounted toms. A blush of sheer adoration spread across her stomach lining, unleashing that same kaleidoscope of butterflies through her being that she had been introduced to weeks ago. Maybe it was too soon to say she loved him, but she could see the rest of her tomorrows in his arms.

“Hey, Ghostie.” She smiled at him from halfway across the room, advancing with less stealth now that he was aware of her presence. “What’cha working on?” She questioned. When her bare torso brushed against the snare drums, she leaned forward to kiss his lips sweetly. He tilted his chin upwards and pushed his bottom lip out, asking for another just seconds after she pulled away from the first.

“Just some new instrumentals.” He mumbled, setting the drumsticks and ballpoint pen aside on the floor tom. He reached for her hands, mumbling a gentle breathed, “come here”, and pulled her down into his lap when his hands could guide her waist. Luke smiled against her neck when she giggled, turning her head so she could tickle his ear with kisses.

“What are you doing?” She giggled when his hot breath tickled the patch of skin his tongue had just caressed. He was being his usually sweet self, though something else was prompting these touchy motives. “Alex is going to kill us if we mess up his drums.” She pulled away from the lips on her neck when they began to distract her, and instead she leveled her eyes with his.

“Said you wanted to play the drums with me.” Luke smiled, nipping at her lips when she pulled them tight in a sheepish grin. She broke out into a full fledged smile at his silliness, cupping his cheeks with her hands and pulling his lips to hers in a proper kiss. “Put your foot on that pedal.” His arms looped around her waist, holding her tightly against him so she wouldn’t slip away from his touch when they started. “That’s the bass pedal. Push it every four counts and when we get to the pre chorus every eight, yeah?”

Luke had gone through relationships and heartbreaks prior to what he had with Mia, but he had never been with someone who understood music like she did. He hadn’t ever met anyone like Mia.

hair braiding:

She left him with Julie and the boys while the sun was still high, letting the band get a few solid hours of practice in without her distraction. She loved Luke, but he was incapable of getting anything done while she lingered, always wanting a cuddle or a kiss. It was cute, made her feel desirable, but she feared it would get annoying for their friends.

She felt his gentle breath against her neck before she felt his arms snaking around her waist, pulling her back into his chest. She didn’t care that his hands were cold as he wiggled them between the waistband of her shorts and dug them into the flesh of her hips. She was just thankful that she still got to feel him against her.

“How was the rest of rehearsal?” She asked softly, reaching her hand up to gently twist silky strands of his milk chocolate locks. Her nails scratched against his scalp, encouraging his arms fall heavy across her sides for a few blissful seconds. She strained against his hold, but he didn’t seem to notice her writhing, or when she let out a soft whine of discontent.

Luke went on about practice, and the song he and Julie introduced to the boys. His smile was evident against her neck, and this time he noticed when she flexed against his hold and tried to twist in his arms. His retelling of practice seized, a smile cradling his lips as he squeezed her tighter, keeping her still.

“What are you trying to do?” Luke taunted, watching her strain once more before admitting surrender to his tight eskomo embrace. He kissed a path along her neck, but it did nothing to distract her from her ultimate goal.

“Let me hold you.” She managed through smiles and hums when his lips tickled her skin, heating the already dangerously hot exposed skin. Luke broke out into a full fledged grin, biting gently at the hollow of her neck.

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders loosely, digging her fingers into his hair, and smiling contently. His head was heavy on her chest, but the weight was welcomed greedily. She loved just getting to hold him like this, considering most days he was pulling her into his lap and showering her with love. Absentmindedly, she had twisted strands of shaggy brown hair into a french braid.

reggie + alex being younger siblings:

Mia and Luke had finally settled down in the basement for a movie night. Julie had been the cover story, though once Mia’s parents were convinced of the girls sleepover, she snuck out of the window and made a mad dash for Flynn’s.

Mia grinned at the blue reflecting off of Luke’s eyes. She had seen Mamma Mia more than a handful of times, in fact it was her favorite modern musical, but Luke had never experienced it, and watching him was better then any scene between Meryl and Amanda.

“Do you like it?” She grinned eagerly, watching Luke’s smile widen when he looked down at her expression of sheer excitement.

She nearly shrieks when Reggie’s voice sounds instead of Luke’s, and her head snaps to the side to find both Alex and Reggie curled up in two spare blankets. Luke looks majorly annoyed, forcing a glare at his bandmates.

“What are you doing here?” He seethed, not lightening up despite the amused smile growing on Mia’s lips.

“You said it was movie night.” Reggie shrugged. “You know, Mia, this isn’t what I expected from you.” He vocalized, not batting an eye when Luke threw his head back in exasperation and threw a handful of popcorn in his direction. The leather clad brunette hummed, picking up a popped kernel and throwing it into his mouth, nodding towards Alex in confirmation of it’s good taste.

“So much for date night.” She whispers into Luke’s chest, though she was just happy to be beside her boyfriend and sharing her favorite film with him.

pre show + post show cuddles:

Luke’s head was buried in the crook of her neck, his anxious fingertips digging into the flesh of her hips. Julie and the Phantoms were playing the Orpheum, again, and his nerves were unrelenting in their assault towards his confidence.

“It’s gonna be great, baby.” She whispered into his ear, fingers twisting at the loose strands of hair that had slipped from the two braids down his scalp. She pulled the elastic tighter, laughing when Luke winced. “You’ll be great.”

“Phantom’s your on in 5!”

Luke squeezed her waist tighter, though whatever nerves had plagued him just seconds ago seemed to dismantle. He was hyping himself up, thrilled by the approaching gig. He got so in his head that he forgot he loved this, it just took a couple braids and kisses to set his confidence back.

“You’ve got your bearings now?” She teased, kissing Luke’s nose and standing from his lap. She held her hands out for him, helping him up and off of the chair. The blue eyed boy nodded, shaking out his hands and forcing a wide grin onto his lips that had her laughing. “Go knock your socks off, Rockstar.”

Luke made a b-line for her after their set wrapped, his sweaty body pinning her in a hug while she squealed and tried to worm away.

“Luke! You’re disgusting. You’re all sweaty.” She whined. Her arms were pinned to her sides and her face was pressed into his chest, filling her with only the scent and feel of his sweaty and smelly body. “Stop it!” She threw her head backwards with a laugh, somehow managing to break away from his embrace.

The braids she had tied into his hair were dripping with sweat so much so that the elastic was falling to the ends of his chocolate locks. She bats at his chest, nodding in the direction of the showers around the corner, “Go take a shower, smelly ellie.”

Luke breaks out into a grin, forcing a ket kiss to her cheek before rushing off in the direction of the communal bathroom and showers, chasing Alex and Reggie who had clearly had the same idea.

guitar lessons:

“These chords right?” She looked up with the same crescent moons in her eyes that Luke had fallen in love with. She had yet to stop trying to impress him, getting better and better at her musical craft by the day.

“Exactly.” Luke smiled, blue eyes glistening releasing the same kaleidoscope of monarchs in her stomach. “Move down to G, baby.” Luke instructed softly, not wanting to break the soft focus she held. He motioned to the neck of his own guitar, smiling widely when she mimicked his actions and strummed the same note.

Seeing her tongue poke out from between her strawberry lemonade lips when she focused and the crinkle of her nose every time she smiled up at him in delight made his half ghostly heart jump.

When she went down to the wrong chord again, and frustratingly looked up at Luke with stars in her waterline, he reached over and adjusted her positioning. His fingers lingered around hers for longer than was needed, but neither party minded as they shared a highly sought after moment.

“You play it.” She whispered, having had enough of her own lessons for the day, wanting to focus instead on her boyfriend's delicate craft.

Luke smiled complying to her demand, nodding her along to sing the softly aged lyrics, “Here comes the sun…”

finger kiss to lips thing:

She’s rambling. She knows that she’s rambling yet she can’t bring herself to stop. Luke had opened a wormhole of thoughts and hadn’t expected the emotional breakdown to follow. Her hands are fisting at his t-shirt, but her eyes are alight with wild emotion that he’s never seen before. She’s dangling over the edge and he’s unsure of how to pull her back to safety.

“Baby.” He tries, pointer finger beneath her chin and directing her attention to himself, “Baby girl. Mia.” Her eyes fall on his but she’s still a mess of hiccups and syllables, shuddering out apologies between every harsh intake of breath her lungs don’t reject. She’s gotten herself so worked up she can’t calm down. She wants him to understand her, but she knows that the more she talks the less he will.

“That’s not what I meant! Of course I want to spend forever with you, I mean, if you want to spend forever with me. I just, I didn’t mean--” She rambles, her eyes pinching tightly when she understands the bending of Luke’s expression.

Luke watches her struggle for a moment more, wishing he could just fill the miniscule amount of time before her next sob and tell her she had nothing to worry about. He wanted to spend forever with her as well; he loved her, but every time he tried to talk she shook her head and looked frantic.

Finally, he pulled his middle and pointer finger together, pressing them to his lips before smothering them against hers. Mia’s eyes drew wide as she tried to comprehend what just happened, but Luke only smiled at the silence at her doe-like expression.

“I love you too.”

forgetting they can feel each other:

They’re working together on a song, surrounded by broken picks and instruments. Julie’s keyboard is on the ground by her thighs and drumsticks are poking out from the tops of Luke’s ears. He’s nearly inverbal, mumbling broken words to her from behind pens and picks, but the sight of him pulls her heart in further.

She plays another melody on the keys, coupling it with the notes Luke had insisted on. It sounds sweet in her ears, and Luke looks up with a smile when it draws him away from his concentration with lyrics. A pick is between his teeth again, so the compliment he tries to throw at her is muffled and close to uninterpretable, but she understands him. She understands everything about him. She understands why he holds her for as long as he can and why he pops into her classes at random. She understands the way he mumbles behind his hands and pens and picks, and why he insists on her making the two of them food even when he’s capable of it. She gets it.

Luke watched Mia bring her lip between her teeth, eyes scanning the workspace before she lands sight on a faded leather notebook. Her path is blocked by his body, but she doesn’t pay it any mind as she pushes onto her hands and makes a start for the lyric book.

Her head collides with Luke’s chest firsts before she falls uncomfortably over the guitar and into his arms, looking bewildered for a moment before she’s brought back to the reality of Luke’s status. She can touch him now, it’s not like three weeks ago when they were condemned to ghostly hovering.

“If you wanted me to hold you, all you had to do was ask.” Luke beamed, moving the guitar aside so he could cuddle her properly. Mia’s cheeks flushed, “Did you forget you could feel me? Well, maybe I have to remind you.”

HONORABLE MENTIONS — the three times mia knew luke was in love with her and the seven she thought he was in love with reggie:

TAGLIST — @r0s3mm @midnightmagicmusings @joshy-obx @parkeret

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only-here-for-jatp · 4 years

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The Secret Chord pt 3

I am very thrilled with my poetic serious title and my chaotic mess of chapter titles that don’t do the title justice.

Anyway this entire chapter is Nick-centric and contains some negative self-talk so if you have difficulty with that (like I do) proceed with caution and stay safe and okay pretty please.

Also, we stan Carrie in this house thanks.

Read it on Ao3 here

And also below! ~2100 words

Nick was pretty sure this was a terrible idea.

It’d seemed like a great idea last night when he was watching Julie and the Phantoms at the Orpheum. The music was loud, and the crowd was electric. The bass kept up a steady rhythm pounding in sync with his heartbeat and it joined the audience into one body perfectly in sync. He’d felt so alive as if all of his nerve endings were firing at once. His joy came out as an endless ache while he watched Julie perform her heart out, her own enthusiasm evident in every note and movement.

She shone so bright on that stage, more so than anyone he’d ever seen. He’d long since known of her grit and determination, the perks of being in school together since elementary school. Over the years he watched as the little girl with the big voice and no fear stood up to bullies, teachers, and during what came to be known as Fallout 2016 her (ex)friend Carrie.

Julie held her head up so high as she walked through the hallways and he was in awe of her even then. There were still some things he was still working out about himself and she was so unapologetically herself. He’d often wished for her bravery to be that strong.

At the same time, he watched Carrie struggle to keep her head above water. Her dad loved her, but he was absentminded and often off on the road or some tour or party or something, leaving Carrie alone in that big empty house. Before there’d been the joy and laughter of Julie and Flynn echoing in the hallways, but now she sat alone in her thoughts.

It was almost imperceptible to anyone who didn’t know Carrie, after all she’d always been a little rough around the edges, but Nick watched her harsh mask develop. He watched her use deflection and bravado to hide her fraying internal state. Nobody seemed to notice her growing intensity and focus on Dirty Candi, but it seemed like someone needed to do something.

Admittedly his feelings crept up on him. At first, he’d started small interactions as a friendly gesture. Little things like a smile or a wave so he could try to communicate somebody saw her. While she seemed a little confused at first, she soon started flashing him a smirk and a friendly sarcastic comment. Rather quickly their friendship grew, it turned into long conversations at lunch or studying together in the library. What started out as concern turned to pride and warmth as he watched this girl who hurt so much use her unwavering force of will (and a little pink glitter) to get up and meet each day with a take no prisoners attitude.

Once he saw her perform for the first time, he was a goner. That little smirk just did something to his insides. He asked her out and he was happy. They were happy.

Until Julie’s mom died. Whatever fallout might have happened between her and Julie, Carrie loved Rose. She’d been the closest thing Carrie ever had to a mother, and the loss hit her hard. Nick knew Julie would’ve granted her a temporary truce and welcomed Carrie with open arms to grieve. He was even pretty sure Carrie knew deep inside herself somewhere too, but the walls she’d built were too high and too wide to bring them down.

Nick did his best to be there for Carrie, but he knew he wasn’t what she needed. She needed Julie and the Molinas, but it wasn’t going to happen. Not yet. Instead her unresolved feelings ate at her morphing into jealousy and anger and acid. He watched this beautiful typhoon of a girl let the acid and anger consume her. Defenses and walls started going up against him too, until she treated him as little more than an accessory or a chess piece in her one-sided match against Julie Molina.

Beautiful burning Julie Molina who after a year of retreating into a cocoon, hiding from the world and her pain burst onto the stage like a firework. She maintained her grace and inner fortitude whatever the world, or Carrie, threw her way. Above all else though, she was kind. After months of being treated like a doormat, he craved the kindness and gentle protective ferocity that was Julie Molina.

He knew he followed her around like a lost puppy, but even if he couldn’t be with her just being around her made him feel like he could do anything. Be anything, even himself. Her music lived and breathed inside him, the words filling him up and offering him a lifeline when he didn’t even know how close he was to drowning.

He ached to return the favor of her steady reassurance and unconditional acceptance and support. She was incredible and she deserved to know. If he could emulate her even just a little bit, he wanted to try, wanted to practice being like Julie Molina.

Of course, this was how he found himself pacing the sidewalk for twenty minutes, gathering the courage to bring her these flowers. It shouldn’t be this hard. Flowers were a regular post-performance kind of gift. I mean, he did have a crush on her, but she seemed to be into her guitarist? Would she think he was creepy or weird or persistent? He didn’t want to scare her off. Maybe this was a bad idea. He probably didn’t have a shot with someone as incredible as her anyway. He’d like to think he stood a chance since her guitarist was a hologram, but the way they looked at each other….

What did it matter? These flowers were not crush flowers. He would’ve gotten her Dahlias for that. These were simply good job flowers. They’d performed at the Orpheum! That was a big deal. This is fine. This is normal.

A small burst of confidence propelled him forward while he gave himself a mental pep talk in his head. Later he would kick himself for not being more aware of his surroundings, but to be fair no one really expects a tall, mysterious demon man to sneak up behind them.

Yet here he was staring at this man in some steam punk adjacent costume, a smug plastic grin on his face and a mildly threatening atmosphere. He’d rang the doorbell, but he hoped Julie didn’t walk out here while this creep was still around.

“How sweet. The brokenhearted teenager fighting for his girl.”

Nick was taken aback. For one thing, brokenhearted was not the right word. He was hopeful. For another- “Do I know you?”

“No, but you will.”

Nick didn’t even have a chance to react before Caleb’s hands were around his neck. It felt like fire was racing through his veins, consuming him. He couldn’t move, his arms spread wide, but his insides struggled against the invasion. Thrashing and shrieking he screamed inside his mind.

It started in his fingertips and toes, his body feeling like it was too crowded. Like something was growing and pushing him out. He fought so hard trying to stretch and stand up to the purple smoke that was blinding and dividing him. Yet he was losing the battle with every moment. Feeling himself getting shoved and squeezed until he couldn’t feel his arms or his legs or the breaths he took or the beating of his own heart. Until he couldn’t feel the weight of his own tongue.

The world went quiet first. Then it went dark.

Nick came to in a room of boundless dark. He thought about being afraid, but it wasn’t a place where things lurked. He could tell it was just empty. A brief glance showed that he could see himself, slightly translucent maybe, but still there. The space seemed to go on forever and the longer he looked the more anxious he became. His eyes darted from space to space, but it was a never-ending sea of nothingness.

A voice echoed around him, making the world rumble and shake. “Now now, Nicholas. My name is Caleb and it’s nice to meet you.”

“Who are you!? What do you want!? Where am I!?” Nick shouted at the disembodied voice, hearing the fear and trembling in his tone and wishing desperately for the confidence and bravado typically attributed to jocks. What he wasn’t prepared for was the jolt that through him.

The pain stabbed in his gut and it felt like it was ripping him open, piece by piece. He fell to his knees with a scream, doing his best not to sob as the feeling lingered. Caleb laughed before continuing. “tsk tsk tsk. I am speaking, you just need to listen. I am… borrowing your body for the time being. This little lifer girl and her trio of ghostly boy band made a fool of me. And NOBODY defies my will and gets away with it.”

“What does that have to do with- aghhhh” Nick couldn’t hide the sobs as another jolt shot through him.

“Yeah, I’m going to need you to be a fast learner Nicky-poo. I’m in charge and there’s literally nothing you can do about it. Just sit there and be quiet and maybe I’ll return your body back in one piece. Besides you may not know what I’m talking about, but you’re close with that lifer brat Julie. Her ghosties would never let me get close, you on the other hand, well they can’t stop you.”

Nick felt icy terror roll through him. Julie? This madman demon was after Julie? “No” he wheezed. He kept repeating the word as if it would give him power as he progressively got louder until he was standing and screaming it into the void, damn the consequences. “NO. I won’t let you hurt her.”

Another jolt ripped through him as an invisible force knocked him back. The laughter seemed to echo around the space reverberating into an endless mocking loop. “You? You won’t let me? What exactly are you going to do Nicholas? After all, you couldn’t even defend yourself against me. What makes you think you’re capable of doing anything at this point to stop my plans?”

Nick sagged against the ground. There wasn’t anything he could do. His insides felt hollowed out as hopelessness descended upon him. Useless. He was absolutely useless.

“There you go! Now you’re getting it. Anyway, this is the inside of your head and it can be manipulated into whatever I want. Behave and I’ll make sure it’s somewhat comfortable, continue to fight and defy me and I’ll make sure you relive your worst nightmares. Got it?”

Nick nodded, curling up on himself in defeat. If only he’d stayed home today.

“Good, now I just need to borrow your memories real quick and we can get this show on the road. After all, I have a fight too.”

It felt like someone was slicing his brain into pages and flipping through it like you would a book or a deck of cards. He’d grabbed his head at the pain and briefly resisted before giving into the feeling. It was almost like he could feel the fingers turning through the pages. Flipping through his life as if it were nothing. As if he were nothing. He hoped Caleb got a cosmic papercut.

And then for a brief shining moment there was nothing. No Caleb, no jolts, no rummaging through his psyche, no noise. No world. Unfortunately, what looked like a big screen popped up in front of him. Was that the Molina’s house? Were these his eyes? He almost couldn’t watch as Julie opened the door. Then there he was again. Alone in the dark vastness of nothing. He let out an empty laugh. Of course, he was. That was him, always alone. Always hiding. Unable to make any true impact on the lives of the people around him. He’d failed to help Carrie battle her darkness and Julie certainly never needed him.

He wondered briefly if anyone would even notice if he was gone. If anyone would even realize this thing that occupied his body was using him like a puppet. He doubted it. No one ever managed to make it past his walls. No one ever viewed him as more than as that blonde lacrosse player, or Carrie’s boyfriend.

He was as unseen and unheard in here as he was for every other moment of his life.

The disembodied voice never said anything, but Nick was sure he could feel Caleb roll his eyes and mutter “teenagers”. Suddenly a couch poofed into existence and Nick settled into it, finding it oddly comforting. He curled himself around a pillow that he’d dragged into his lap, ready to watch his life spin out of his control.

#jatp #Julie and the Phantoms #Jatp fanfic #The Secret Chord #Nickaleb

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taygra5shaon · 5 years

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21 questions tag

rules:: answer 21 questions and then tag 21 people to do the same that you’d like to know better

(i don’t know 21 people in tumblr, and sure as hell i dont whant to look like a weirdo if i tag people who i never talk with, so, i will tag the ones i know, then 2 i like they blog. sorry ;_; )

i got tagged by @brian-maybe-not, thanks you soo much!

i was never tagged by someone in what, 4-5 years in tumblr, (i dont post that much of things, and i’m akward when i try to make friends in internet, so it was ‘normal’ to be a ‘ghost in tumblr’) but you did, and i will never stop thanks you enough! love you!

nicknames::

so, of nicknames I have had many, even if they have not remained: - in elementary school they called me Jaws, because I intimidated the school boys (I was very 'masculine' when I was little, and sometimes they mistaken me for a boy because I fought with them) -some friends called me shaon, because ‘it sound good with your personality!' (I never understood what they meant by this) -some are names that have taken the place of my real name, that sometimes people could not say well, like Carina, Marina, Helina, etc .. one, however, remained since my childhood, given by my parents, Costy.

(at the beginning I didn't like it, but as the years went by, I got used to it)

zodiac sign:: the zodiac sign of pisces :)

height:: I’m 5′0-1 (ish)......i’m short

hogwarts house:: I think I would be among the Gryffindors, because despite my being socially anxious, I am enough brave and loyal, and I like helping people (even if my hard-working nature can make one think of hufflepuff)

last thing i googled:: ......goggle traduction..... this is self explanatory

fav musicians:: hum ... so, my favorite band is Queen, (I need to explain why?) since I was little, my mother made me hear their classics, being a big fan too :) and is difficult to explain what I like about them ... their music is spectacular, and gives you an incomparable feeling of love (at least for me) their style, each of them artists with their different and unique personalities, they manage to put it together and create legendary music, together they formed a harmony, like the notes form a music. together they formed a family that few people have the privilege of knowing its warmth and love. (I could go on for hours, so let's talk about something else) I like the Beatles, as I said before, it was my mother who introduced them to me, and their music is iconic, wonderful, and every time I hear them on the radio it's hard not to start singing with them. for the more recent bands, I like Panic at the Disco, with interesting and very beautiful music, and incredible music videos (I like the art deign). then I like Linkin Park, even if sometimes their music is a little depressive, it's incredible and the feeling they give is beautiful. then, as individual artists, I like Ed Sheeran for his incredible music that it's impossible not to sing them. then there is Melanie Martinez, with her iconic WTF (as always, i love the artistic side) video, with music full of amazing messages and feelings (a bit sad, but still beautiful) I could go on for centuries to list which musics artists I like, but I don't want to make peole bored, so it's all for now

fav books:: then, my favorite books ... the lord of the rings, the hobbit and the silmarillion, then there is the saga of Eragorn (although the last book is not as beautiful as the others), Harry potter, and Narnia ( classic) as less classic books: the Medicus, Graceling, the tree of life, the saga of Inkheart, terese requin, la mort c'est mon metirer, my name is nobody, Sette volte gatto.

song stuck in your head:: there are many music or pieces of text of the music that remain in my head, and ultimately they are Queen ... damn. now i have 'somebody to love' and 'i whant to break free' in my head, and who knows what I'll have tomorrow ....

following:: 152

followers:: 175! wow, I never thought I'd go that far, and I thank you with all my heart for having the patience to follow me until now! I adore you (even if I don't know you ^^') after I finish the exams, I will open a small request space, and you can ask me any kind of drawing (no sexual ones. I'm not very comfortable with them)

do you get asks:: no. even if I'm open to talking. talk to me :)

amount of sleep:: hum .... after hours of art work, I can usually fall asleep around 1/2 at night, and I wake up at 4 am. at that moment I'm like a zombie and I try to go back to sleep, but I can't do that much any more, so, I'm in a kind of sleep-wake. at 6-7 in the morning, I have enough conscience, but not wanting to get out of bed, I take the phone and scroll tumblr or youtube. at 8 am I’m out of bed (this during the holidays, because when I'm under university, I wake up at 5 and get up at that time to study) i’m quite a morning person

lucky number:: 5 or 6, like the numbers of the people of my family :)

what are you wearing:: a black and white striped tank top and denim shorts with tights

dream job:: work in the production of animation, video games or cinema as art and design style :) or work with writers to get a decent movie script. or as an actress, even though I am nervous and akward, I have always enjoyed acting (and apparently I was also good, since my mother make me joined many times the theater)

I would like to inspire people, and make them feel with my works, make them happy and amazed :)

dream trip:: hum .... I don't have a precise destination, I'd like to go around the world and see the historical wonders of man and nature. I'd like to do it with someone, maybe a loved one with i would love to share the wonders of the earth. I am a hopeless romantic

instruments:: no. I tried different instruments, like piano and guitar, but I am denied playing them ... but I can sing, if this can be counted as an instrument

languages:: I know Italian because I am Italian, lol. but jokes aside, I speak fluent French and some English, (although I am fluent in writing in English, but not so much in writing French) then I would like to speak Spanish or German, I still have time :)

favorite songs::auch, I have a billion favorite music:

- Caravan Palace: Lone Digger. I'm crazy about the style of music similar to the 20s and 30s -Gorillaz: feel good inc. I love the singer's voice and the guitar of the central piece -Linkin Park: iridescent. I'm sorry, sad as it is, and one of my favorites -Katy Perry: Roar: the tiger and my sign in the Chinese zodiac, and my favorite animal (explains itself) -Eminem: Venom. that song is one of the coolest things in the world -Roberto Benigni: how much I loved you. I can not put this beautiful Italian song. it makes me full of love and it breaks my heart every time I listen - Melanie Martinez: baby i'm mad. christ, this song is fantastic. -Deiver Us from the - prince of Egypt -. omg, this music is spectacular. -QUEEN: Somebody to love, Killer Queen, I was born to love you, who wants to live forever, etc ... DO I NEED TO SAY WHY I LIKE? NO? WELL!

random fact:: hum ....

I have a love-hate relationship with my bicycle, because I had all my accidents on the road with it. (I was hit by a car twice, and crashed on a wall because the brakes didn't work)

I end up at the hospital so many times that I needed another pair of hands to count it. (I'm clumsy)

and lastly, although I am clumsy in the civilized world, I adore survival in the forests, and fight sword against sword with my cousin.

aesthetic:: ok ..... i don't have a precise style, maybe casual? with some 70s touches. maybe even a little hipster or nerd

ok ...... i will just tag some people I love and follow, ok?

@bowieandqueen11 , @avaloncelsus , @akhmenawkward , @innueendo , @ghostie-stories , @brian-maybe-not

(they are few people, but I like talking to them and follow they blog, so forgive me if you never talked to me, I'm just a poor girl)

#tag #i'm a poor girl #a lonely girl #forgive me

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sawthefaeriequeen · 6 years

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Top Ten Books Read In 2018

1) The Last Summer of the Death Warriors by Francisco X. Stork

I picked this up at a book fair, read the summary, and figured I'd surprise myself with this author I'd never heard of before. It's about the friendship between DQ, a guy with terminal cancer dealing with his complicated feelings for his estranged-but-conciliatory family, and Pancho, a guy who's biding his time until he can get revenge on the person who's killed one of his family members. I like that both boys are raw and real and people—Pancho obviously has messed up emotions, but DQ can be plenty bitter and angry too: he's not an Inspirational Cancer Patient stereotype.

2) The Sherwood Ring by Elizabeth Marie Pope

Girl moves into her uncle's old ancestral house sometime during the 18th century and gets immersed into the past lives and loves of the ghosts that thrived there during the days of the Revolutionary War, their paths often crossing each other's. I swear I have never seen more delightful ghost characters in my entire life.

3) The Unbound by V.E. Schwab

So by the time I'd picked this up, I was having mixed feelings about V.E. Schwab – on one hand, she'd always written worlds that engage me almost instantly with their creativity. On the other hand, I'd just recently been horribly disappointed by the ending to what's been her most popular series so far: I thought her final Shades of Magic book did a most spectacular job on dropping the balls on everything good about it. Up to reading it, I'd thought the author's hype was deserved. But after, well…

So when I picked this up, it was with much trepidation. I'd loved the previous book, The Archived: the big old house setting, the grim closed-off girl/sweet sunny boy dynamic the lonesome warrior setup, all were like catnip to my id. I didn't want it ruined by a bad sequel. Fortunately, this book took everything I loved about the book and turned it up to eleven. It upped the stakes, it intensified the relationships, and it also added a mental illness angle that I personally found very meaningful.

The author is still kiiinda on notice so I'm not sure I want a third book. If there is one, dear God, please be good. *crosses fingers*

4) Turtles All The Way Down by John Green

I remember thinking, as I was reading this: this is really, really working for me but will it work for someone neurotypical? 2018 was hell and I was just so desperate for the people in my life to get it, and so I kept hopping on trains of thought like this.

Anyway, this book was spot on in what goes on in the wirings of my anxious brain. Green's usual turns of phrase took an incredibly frenetic turn at times, which, I know, is exactly what it's like to have a mental illness. This is not a book about "this is what to do" it's about how it IS or how it can GET.

I'm still really grateful for that quote about the spiral – how it tightens, but also how it eternally widens. When I first saw the cover, I thought it was kind of blah; now I look at that spiral and see something different. I see the hope of creating a new 'normal'.

5) The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

This was so readable it surprised me. I thought I'd go slow on it because: war story where it's a foregone conclusion that it ends tragically for the leads? Yeah, I'm not in a rush to reach the end of that. But I blazed right through this book. There's something really addictive about Madeline Miller's storytelling and how she brings her characters together and follows their blossomings and downfalls through the years. And then, the course of the Iliad and the inevitable sadness for Achilles, Patroclus, and Briseis was more like the slow turning of the tide rather than getting hit with a tidal wave. Anyway, not only was it readable but I'm finding myself eager to re-read it.

6 ) The Hero and the Crown by Robin McKinley

Part of my Read Everything Robin McKinley Writes mission that began last year. I'd liked the sheer escapism and the desert setting in The Blue Sword, but that whole white savior thing kinda put me off from enjoying Harry and the book more fully than I would've liked.

It was not so for this book, thankfully! Who knew that reading about the nitty-gritty of slaying big scaly beasts could be so satisfying? That's classic Robin McKinley, as I'm learning – you love what the protag loves. And then I really dug how the dead dragon's ghost haunting Aerin acts as a metaphor for mental illness.

(As I continue to wrestle with my diagnosis, I continually appreciate all the depression/anxiety metaphors I encounter in media. Maybe one day I'll make a post about it) AND ALSO: a love triangle that's actually well done and that serves our heroine's identity and character rather than taking away from it? Yes. Yes, thank you.

7) A Certain Slant of Light by Laura Whitcomb

Yeah so, this book killed me. It's about two twenty-something ghosts with unfinished business who find themselves in the bodies of two teenagers whose souls appear to have completely vacated theirs. They find themselves falling for each other and trying to find out what happened to their 'hosts' and what went on in their past lives. They also find themselves battling to survive the hostile home lives that their 'hosts' left behind. It's all very beautiful and kind of twisted and also a love letter to words and probably my most unexpected book of the year. And I have NO idea to rec it to people. "Read this, it's kind of fucked up but gorgeous but also can get triggery so step warily?" Uh.

8) Deerskin by Robin McKinley

See warnings above. Oh God. But really, I totally respect Robin McKinley for going full-out faithful to how utterly fucked up fairy tales can be while still creating a survival story. I'm not just talking about Lissar surviving spoilers incestual rape and miscarriage (indeed, I'm not qualified to talk about it) but how hers is a story of healing: by surviving the elements, by nursing living things back into life, by building herself up into a legend without even knowing it.

9) Muse of Nightmares by Laini Taylor

Just an incredibly satisfying ending to a duology that at the same time echoes that quote from Michael Ende's The Neverending Story: "but that is another story and shall be told another time." I love when something ends with that sense of: "there are even more stories and adventures for our beloved characters out there than you can possibly fathom, and you are now free to make up them yourself."

10) Autoboyography by Christina Lauren

I was intrigued by the premise: a half-Jewish guy and a Mormon guy fall for each other over the course of a writing class. And upon starting it, I could tell straight (heh, straight) away that it was going to be a favorite. It's an unabashedly kilig romance about falling for the wonderfulness in each other,and both mains are fucking adorable, and made me want to give them both a ton of hugs. Oh, and this book further reinforced my belief that the key to first-person writing is having a good voice.

Another thing is, I basically never see YA books that deal with growing up in a religion and actually-loving it and having it be an inextricable part of your identity… and then having to deal with the darker, prejudiced sides that you really wish would be excised from it altogether especially if they are opposed to who you are. To deal with it sensitively and touchingly, not only in a YA book but in an m/m romance? Well done.

honorable mention!

-The Secret History by Donna Tartt

I was reading this on the bus on the way home to the province for Christmas and I could not stop laughing and I had no idea to explain to my very curious sister that it was because half the protagonists were high as a kite at the funeral of the friend that they all killed and one of them had just very noisily killed a bee in the church vestibule and it made the loudest sound on the planet and they're all gonna have to ~aesthetically grieve and pallbear now even though THEY killed their friend and w o w it's like Nuwanda from Dead Poets Society was cloned five times.

Sometimes "pretentious people murder someone and somehow it is hilarious" is just exactly my cup of tea.

and a couple of series binges!

Almost 10 years ago (god, what the hell), I had a "YA Paranormal Romances I Might Actually Like" list, and the two trilogies below were on it. There's something gratifying about finally crossing off books on your TBR that have been there for ages:

-The Shade Trilogy by Jeri Smith-Ready (Shade, Shift, Shine) This series came out on the tail of the Great YA Paranormal Romance boom and I really wish I'd picked it up then (I also really wish some of the covers it got weren't so damn off-putting. It's like Animorphs all over again) because it's such cut above so many of the books that were being churned out in those days.

The premise is: what if there was a global paranormal event that left the portion of the population born after a certain year with the ability to see ghosts? I really like that the author thought this out thoroughly – it's not just a oooh spooky ghosties gimmick. Everything is affected: the educational system, the police force, politics, technology, travel, you name it.

The heroine was smart and truth-seeking and had nuancedrelationships with lots of female characters (bff, mentor, aunt who raised her, mom who died… ), the Betty love interest was a total sweetheart who also didn't seem too good to be true and who was capable of making major teenage fuck-ups, and the Veronica love interest was a rock-and-roll ghost who had the post-life character arc that I sadly wish Maggie Stiefvater had given Noah Czerny. I kind of loved them all a lot and one of the reasons I wish I'd read these books as they came out was so I could've been un-jaded just a little bit about Those Pesky Love Triangles.

(Someday I…really ought to make an analysis about why I dislike love triangles in general and what exactly was up with the ones that DID work for me.)

-Wolves of Mercy Falls trilogy by Maggie Stiefvater

I read the whole series toward the year's end. It was precisely the cold-weather binge I was craving. I may have my quarrels with some of her writing decision, but really few people can do atmospheric, poetic writing the way Maggie Stiefvater does. The romances were a bit too YA for me in this one, but I ended up really sympathizing with every single POV character anyway. And I mean, cold and poetry and family and books and wolves-as-family*.

(*One day, I'll have the emotional armor to watch Wolf's Rain again. )

#personal #text post #cross posted #the written word

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