#anyone got any vacancies? asking for a friend

[satoruhour]

HIS FAVOURITE W— STUDENT !

a/n: dilly / @crysugu i am losing the pwp war i needed the lore to be in this HELP. anyway !!! professors bc i cannot stop my mind from spiralling while starting my university classes — im not entirely proud of this but eehhh ….

wc: 4k

warnings: ultimately semi-public sex for all, unprotected sex, cumshot, standing doggy, brief oral (m receiving), brief f! masturbation, brief fingering (gojo), geto is a professor who is also a camboy, camgirl!reader, f! and m! masturbation, mentions of bad dragon’s cumtubes, brief fingering, unprotected sex, creampie / breeding kink (geto), pussy slapping, spitting (on yo pussy), pet names, clit stimulation, oral / cunnilingus, tit play, fingering, implied f! masturbation (nanami), mentions of murder, stripper!reader, riding, degradation, calls you ‘slut’ and ‘whore’, calls you ‘mama’ once too, unprotected sex, oral (m receiving), deep-throating, slight face-fucking (toji), n*sfw under the cut

✶ GOJO

professor gojo was… an interesting teaching figure. he didn’t have a set way of doing lectures or tutorials, nor was his feedback on assignments entirely coherent, but he was fun and unorthodox. he was also hot as fuck, as you’ve heard from your friends, but you never really got the deal even after seeing his photo on the university website or from miles away entertaining some starstruck student. his classes were always left with no vacancies, too, only able to see what your friends meant after stepping foot first into the lecture.

you were a tad bit early, greeted with gojo sitting at the front with his legs propped up on the desk as he shot you a nonchalant greeting and you think maybe you should’ve signed up for another lecture group, but then he speaks and the air is knocked out of your chest. professor gojo is charismatic when he teaches about art, design and media, captivating everyone with the stark white hair and blue eyes, but he’s clever with his glances because you aren’t realising he stares at you more than anyone else.

aren’t you in your second year? how did he not see you anywhere last year? why did you just sign up? 

the smiles he gives you are sweeter than others, the words more sugar coated with lilts in his voice and you’re chastising yourself for not being any different from everyone else, soon turning into the girls who ask for extra tutoring sessions and sidling up to him on campus — at least you’d get the full experience.

“oh! sweetness, what are you doing here?” you’ve managed to get gojo just as he leaves his office, standing outside for quite some time thinking if you’d really want to do this. several lecturers and professors have already walked past asking if you needed anything, but no matter how much you wanted to say professor gojo’s name, it always turned into something like waiting for a friend.

“oh— uhm, professor gojo, just wondering if the grade for that major project is really set in stone?”

gojo makes a show of thinking, but you know you’re asking for the devil himself when he replies yes with a stifled grin and you’re asking if the two week period of appealing works for the major you’re in.

“you can submit other collaterals as an appeal but it might either boost your grade or bring it down,” the professor leans down with a sick smile on his face, because he’s had so many people outside just like this, nervous from his advances and yet not going through with what they thought they could do. but this time it’s you, the you who he imagined taking on his office desk or even in a lecture theatre for everyone to see, who wants the words to fall from your lips just so he could be your knight in shining armour.

“is there really no… other way to appeal?” you swallow when gojo switches the position and gets you in exactly where he wants you: your back facing his office, his face dangerously close to yours while his eyes slyly catching the way your thighs rub together.

gojo smirks to himself when you knock down yet another cup of stationery on his desk after “discussing” ways you could improve your grades, nails making unsatisfactory noises on the wooden desk while he can hear your cunt gush around him, made obvious from the squelch of your hole and he’s muttering praises into your neck from behind.

“this what you had in mind, baby?” just another girl in his roster, getting ruined just for a grade that wasn’t even that bad. what you didn’t know is that you were the only girl, getting professor gojo so hard in lectures and tutorial classes just from the sight of you that to finally have you — it’s a sweet reward. you shiver when his hand reaches to your front to rub at your clit and you’re grasping at nothing as moans leave your lips.

“y-yeah, professor—” gojo is filthy, lewd, lifting your leg to prop up on the desk just so he could get deeper in you, your pussy everything he imagined and more as he continues to fuck into you. you’re warmer than his hand, than some hookup’s mouth from the club, clenching around his cock so tightly his hips stutter.

“f-fuck, angel, tryna snap my dick off?” you let out an incredulous chuckle at that, hips moving back to meet his while the sounds of his balls slapping against your ass fill the room. your juices are coating his length so well, too, that gojo’s eyes lock on your cunt that sucks him in over and over again, the spread of your pussy lips just amplifying his moans. the other spreads your cheeks and sighs at the translucent ring of cum at the base of his cock, hips fucking up to hit your sweet spot that you’re cumming with a shock down your spine — so hard, so deep, so intense that you’re jolting from the orgasm with whimpers of his name. gojo never truly is done with you after pulling out to cum on your ass, however, and you aren’t either.

there’s a thrill that runs through his veins when you back him up onto the sofa, a glimmer in your eyes that suggest you’re as intoxicated on him as he is on you, a sultry gaze taking over your shyness from earlier before he’s pushed onto the cushions.

“thank you for the meal, professor,” you giggle and gojo swears he’s reached his death when your mouth first closes around his still sensitive tip and he whines loudly, hearing your fingers fill your drooling cunt as your hand squeezes out leftover cum from before. a hand runs through your hair and your cockdrunk face is enough for him to see white—

professor gojo thinks you look heavenly between his legs.

✶ GETO

you sigh echoes throughout your dorm room, ending the stream and collecting your keep for the day as you grimace at the mess you’ve made on your sheets. it’s not like it wasn’t pleasurable, but on some days you’re wondering how long you truly need to serve gross men on the internet for it to be enough to pay off your university fees. sure, there were a few attractive people who commented and tipped you, but that was the extent of it. it’s not long before you can only think about cleaning up and taking a big fat nap, but a video in the sidebar catches your attention.

it seemed like a casual stream — no script or planned storyline apart from a heavily tattooed arm taking up half the screen, his pelvis just slightly off the thumbnail. he was faceless, too, filming rather from the chest down which was also inked, something that sends a chill to your core.

it’s only later when you’re slipping your dildo back into you as you watch this stranger pump his cock, guttural groans and slick noises filling your airpods that you realise the dragon wrapping around his arm looks awfully familiar. you’re so blissed out by pleasure, focusing on the needy moans that the man lets out before he cums with a grunt, so much cum leaking out from him. you’ve reached your high too, but you have no time to admire the stranger because it seemed like he was in a hurry, but not before you’ve caught a glimpse of his lip ring.

you know why he looked so familiar, now, standing in front of him in his office while his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, something he doesn’t do often. geto suguru doesn’t wear his lip ring in lecturers either, and now you think you know why because they match the video you’ve seen just last night. you aren’t even entirely sure why you were called in, and you think maybe it’s because you “accidentally” sent a friend request, but you’re taken aback when he asks you if you’ve already selected a tutor to be your mentor throughout your major project.

“surprised? i sent out the email a week ago, love.” you try not to let the name get to you, and the confession lingers at the tip of your tongue.

“y-yeah! i saw it, professor geto, just—”

everyone was no stranger to professor geto’s striking looks, always turning heads with his unconventional gauges and long hair that probably should’ve landed him in a modelling agency in the first place. except, he’s opting instead to teach linguistics, a fitting major for him to talk of the history of language and its formation of it, even slipping in some latin and greek to show its origins but you can hardly listen when all you can focus on is the tight pull of his shirt around his body while his hair falls around his face and you think maybe it was a bad time to think if his hair falls out of his bun while he rails someone. you hope soon it’ll be you, just so you can confirm it for yourself with no other reason involved (you’re a fucking liar).

geto clears his throat and you swallow and the flex of his forearms only distract you further, the dragon on his arm seemingly laughing at your torment as it moves along his skin — the other doesn’t miss your dilemma, staring at you for your answer with a dark stare and enjoying the effect he had on you. your brain doesn’t respond fast enough, though, and you’re blurting out the first thing as you watch the curve of his mouth turn in either distaste or satisfaction; you weren’t sure.

“i saw you stream yesterday—” and you slap a hand over your mouth, wanting to run immediately, but you didn’t expect him to smile after a moment of recognition, making the connections to your account until his mouth falls open just a little.

“you’re the little cutie who sent me a request last night, aren’t ya?”

as he asks the question you hoped he wouldn’t ask, you find there’s nothing on your mind except maybe seeing his tattooed arms wrap around you — and you did. they looked so much better up close, leading from one thing to another in that stuffy office soon they’re looking especially good with how he’s currently dragging the tip of his cock along your folds, collecting your slick as you hold onto his biceps after confessing sin after sin about you from—

“i’ve jerked off to your videos.” a burn on your cheeks when geto sets you on his office table, palms leaving hot trails along your thighs and skin. he lets you play with his bulge, hands probably forming bruises on you from how you relieve the tension in his pants.

“the way your cunt wraps around that dildo — makes me wish i was there fuckin’ your pussy instead.” a gasp and a moan when he preps you with both fingers as he sucks hickeys into your neck and plays with your tits, pinching your nipple that has you clenching around him.

“didn’t miss how you like to be bred in your videos too. think maybe you need some real cum, princess,” geto’s button up shirt is pried open by now, trousers just barely pulled down below his hips because he has a lecture in about half n’ hour. though, he wanted your pussy all to himself and if 27 minutes was all he was granted, he was going to make full use of it. geto groans into your hair when your legs wrap around his middle and he’s reeling at how he’s been watching your videos for the longest time and yet, nothing compares to having you fall apart by his hands.

a quick glance to his watch tells him fifteen minutes, eyes flitting back to the squelch of your cunt around him and he smiles smugly at the whimpers he knows so well. he’s sure it’s imprinted on his brain by now but his dick still jumps at the many variations you’ve let out during the 27; he’d commit every single one to memory. “professor— s-shit!”

geto angles his hips up, the curve of his cock hitting that spot just right that your back arches and you let out a drawn out moan, “yes, baby?”

“w-wan’ your cum in me, suguru,” you’re pleading with a drunk little smile and your face is twisted into such pleasure he’s only seen through pixels that geto cums almost immediately with a pained laugh seeing the real thing, hips stilling as he fills you up, up, up to the brim with hot, white semen that geto feels embarrassed to climaxing so quickly. but what can he do? when his favourite camgirl and student asks to be bred, it’s only natural.

how could he possibly say no?

✶ NANAMI

“does that mean the poem is written from the cross’ perspective?” your hand shoots up in hopes of interpreting the text correctly, but also because, just maybe, that you wanted to impress a little someone at the front of the lecture theatre. beside you, you can hear the gasp of your friend along with the eyes of various other students. “sort of like— personification?”

nanami points to you with his glasses that he’s long removed, a small smile on his face. it’s not like you’re trying too hard, but of course you know your shit fairly well. you always have in every class, it was just a bonus you were so attractive that all nanami could think about was spreading your legs right on this desk. “yes, almost. anthropomorphism, something that was very common in poems or works written in old english.”

you were sceptical about professor nanami at first, especially since he was a lecturer who was transferred here from overseas only three months ago and is technically quarter of a white man, but he held command of the japanese language well enough for you to understand, both in speech and concepts. you were more interested in the lecturer himself though, piqued from the moment he explained his grandfather was danish and you turn to your friend, explains the blonde hair, doesn’t explain how he’s so insanely fine, giggling quietly to each other the first day.

as for your major, it was texts after story after poem, but you enjoyed it alongside giving your own input in class — something you knew would help your participation grades. you’ve raised your hand in more ways than one, always coming up at the end of lectures with a question, stopping him in hallways to show him the book you were currently reading. so that’s why you were confused when you were called to the front of the lecture theatre after everything’s over. it couldn’t be bad, right?

it wasn’t bad, it was much better, especially when nanami’s got your legs on either side of him on the lecture theatre desk while he takes his rightful place between your legs — somewhere he’s always longed to be. both the front and back doors are locked, with only your soft, muffled moans filling the room. but nanami has no shame, slurping up the juices that drip from your pussy loudly, possibly staining the desk below him. he’s cared before about the condensation of his drinks but when it comes to your sweet, sweet cunt? he doesn’t give one fuck.

“taste so good, sweetheart,” nanami moans wrapping a forearm around your thighs and just eats. he flicks his tongue over your clit, while the other hand goes up to squeeze at your tits, kneading and playing with them while you’re still at awe at the man on his knees, at how you’ve gotten one of the hottest professors in the university eating out of your pussy like it’s the last meal on earth.

you’re snapped out of your daze when nanami lands a few slaps onto your pussy, brown eyes boring holes into your skull. but this stare is different, as opposed to glaring down the mischievous boys who can’t stop making noise, this is…

“pay attention when i eat your little pussy, angel,” the demanding tone has you shivering, a small grin stifled when he nods in deserved approval and continues his assault. fingers slip in before you have time to react and your head is thrown back so hard it bumps against the wood but you don’t care, clamping down around his fingers. nanami’s pace is unforgiving, sucking hard on your clit while he pumps them in and out.

“feel good?” nanami asks through slurps as he catches your eye, licking one last stripe before gathering his saliva into a ball and he spits onto your clit, sight so lewd you clamp around his fingers. he admires how the way the glob of liquid runs down your cunt and mixes with your arousal that he can’t wait for it to be his cum instead.

“better than…” your voice trails off when he rubs in his spit, a thumb on your bud while he continues to move his fingers and your thighs are already trembling from how nanami knows all your sweet spots in such a short period of time. nanami simply chuckles at your sensitivity, meeting you halfway as you sit up to feel his lips against yours and he whispers against your lips—

“what were you gonna say, baby?”

you’re heaving for oxygen as he adds a third finger and you’re just hoping he’d show you his fucking dick already. hot breath fans across your lips and you smile to yourself seeing how your words affect him.

“better than fucking myself with my fingers thinkin’ it’s your cock, prof.”

✶ TOJI

it was nine in the morning, and toji could already feel a headache forming from the amount of absentees in his class, simply sighing before pulling up the details for today’s lecture, eyes unknowingly looking for you in the large lecture theatre. he finds that you’re already looking, clad in a cardigan and tired eyes — no doubt from trying to reach his deadline earlier than usual. toji found that you liked to do that, the first one to always submit your essays and assignments, so that’s why he knows what game you’re playing at when you’re asking the difference between first, second and third degree murder when you already know their definitions.

he would know — you got full marks the other time. 

“hm?” toji only hums when he sees your enthusiastic face and a quick look down to your lower half shows how your legs spread naturally for him. the professor only licks his lips before he spots your underwear, entertaining you for now as you stare on earnestly, while nothing is actually entering your brain. that’s okay, though, you’re smart.

toji can count on one hand the amount of times you manage to catch him off guard, but he didn’t expect both of those times to be on the same day. it was a busy night at the club, trailing behind professor gojo, bored, until the clock hits 11 and the shift changes, some dancers retiring for the night whilst others make their way out. they emerge with pumps and skimpy outfits, but toji still hasn’t found someone worth wasting his loaded bank account on until you’re stepping out in a corset and garters and toji whistles lowly, eyes travelling up your person unforgivingly before he hears a small gasp.

his curiosity is piqued at the small noise, only to be greeted with your widened eyes and taut muscles at having seen your professor at the strip club you work at, but with a clap from somewhere backstage your body moves naturally into a professional stance, and perhaps a little more sluttily than other days.

your professor was hot, of course you would work twice as hard, twisting your body around the pole while you show off your assets — things you were covering just this morning in professor toji’s lecture. he taught criminology, a minor that you were trying out in your second year of uni and if it didn’t work, you’d drop it, but no matter how much you complained about the class, the green eyes that bore into yours in lectures always seem to ask you to stay. you never really knew whether he was looking at you or not.

at least now, you’ll make him.

toji’s hands tightened around the wad of cash he planned to waste tonight, all put on hold just from watching the way you put your body on display. he wouldn’t have imagined seeing you tonight at the strip club he let gojo drag him to, but he’s almost glad he’s here when you seem to be only dancing for him, all focus on the other patrons lost.

your eyes are still locked with toji’s, reminding you of the times in the lecture theatre where green was all you could see, a smile creeping on your face when one of your girlfriends behind you whispers that the man with the black hair and tight shirt wants a private session with you.

that’s all it took before you feel toji’s hands on your ass later in the private room, pulling you to his front with a smirk. “what’s a sweet girl like you doin’ here?”

you roll your eyes as you feign annoyance. your heart was pounding along with the music, finally being able to feel his toned body from the front., “cut the crap, prof. you booked me for a reason. what, here to talk about my grades or something?”

“what? can’t see my favourite student?” you scoff with a small smile.

“and how did you know i work here?”

“i didn’t, but seeing you work that pole,” toji grins, landing a smack on your butt before grinding his very obvious, large bulge on you and he’s loving the way it seemed to stimulate your clit, “i need ya to show me what i’ve been missing, mama.”

toji groans later while you’ve got his cock in his mouth, on your knees in front of him while you’re fisting the places you can’t reach. you take most of him easily, feeling the tip of his length reach the back of your throat. there, your eyes flick up to him, doe eyed and pleading. it isn’t long before you feel his hips bucking into your mouth and the cute twitch of his cock in your mouth, moaning around him as you knead his thighs, dragging him closer with what little strength you had.

“dirty fuckin’ slut, huh?” toji mumbles out breathlessly, tightening his grip around your hair before you start bobbing your head again, a plethora of lewd noises alongside the slurp of your saliva and his pre-cum mixing only makes your panties wetter and sends your cunt clenching around nothing. “who knew my cutest student was such a whore?” your head reels at the degradation, sucking in your cheeks even more while you slobber over him. toji swears under his breath when your tongue sweeps over his tip, collecting his pre-cum.

“it’s s’big in my mouth, professor,” giggling, you bob your head faster as the other’s noises increase in volume, and he’s left to tap the side of your skull, causing you to tilt your head in question. the vibrations of your moans has him grinding into your mouth, shutting you up until he’s cumming down your throat with a loud groan. toji spills so much into your mouth that you have to swallow twice, pulling on your jaw as you show him the remnants of the cum still on your tongue.

“’m sure they have it somewhere in the conduct about professors not having sexual relations with a student,” toji chuckles when he sees you peel off your underwear, eagerly wrapping his arms around your waist. “or even something about cutting corners to get your grades up…” it’s a little soft, trailing off when he feels you drag his tip along your pussy and he’s mesmerised with how your dripping folds accommodate him easily.

you pout in dramatics, thighs tightening around his when you take inch after inch of him before you’re bottoming out. there’s a deep sigh coming from you before you’re moving your hips lazily, a certain slur to your words that already show you’re drunk on your professor’s cock and toji only smiles.

“yeah, but my grades are perfectly fine,” you whisper with a small whine when toji squeezes your ass, something he never thought he’d get a taste of.

“plus, we’re not in the classroom now, are we, professor?”

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for ghosting a friend over one word? (tw: rape mention) II was friends with this guy for almost two years. We met when he moved in after there was a vacancy at our apartment and my roommate posted on Facebook looking for another roommate (they were acquainted but didn't know each other well). He moved in and was much quicker to call us his friends than we were, I think because he was just really grateful to have a stable and steady home without yelling/hateful relatives and after experiencing an armed robbery in his previous home. He'd chat with us endlessly every other day, which left both of us feeling extremely burnt out and wanting to be alone most of the time. In his own words he considered us like his brother and sister, meanwhile he was sorta just a friend and a roommate to us. Despite this I knew he was a good guy and decided to stay in touch after we all moved out of that apartment a year later. I invited him to an online D&D campaign I was in which lasted another year, and that was pretty much our only communication weekly for about a year besides texting and catching up occasionally. A little while after the campaign ended he was able to move out of his mom's place into his own apartment, and invited me over to hang. I said yeah cause why not, I could tell he really wanted some company (I was his first-ever guest at his new place,) and I figured it wouldn't hurt to hang. We chat for a couple hours, he's real enthused to have me over but I'm just kinda hanging out and keeping up with small talk. After that we decided to play some Super Smash Bros, and for some reason he thinks it'd be a good idea to put the two of us on a team against six mid-level CPUs with items on, and the match is just an overstimulation shitshow and we get the hell beat out of us. At one point before we lost, he got knocked out by a Bewear NPC, and yells out "Oh my God, Bewear, I will RAPE you" ... I was disturbed. Silent for a few seconds before he mutters an apology for getting angry. I told him it's alright, but to think about his choice of words, since I'm not very confrontational and didn't want to make a scene of it. Inside, though, I was thoroughly disgusted at him for thinking it's okay to say something like that. I'd kinda experienced this from him before while we were living together, basically the same thing happened but he called the NPC r-----ed, he said he was actually directing the word at himself cause of his aspergers and needed to work on his internalized guilt. I think he's just indecent.

Anyway I went home from that visit and never talked to him again. he texted me a while later and asked if it was about the rape thing. He thought that I wasn't talking to him because I thought the rape comment was directed at me, which I knew it wasn't. I don't think he understands that that was a fucked up thing to say to anyone, ever, in any context. I don't feel like I should have to explain that to him, cause it should be fucking obvious how unacceptable that is. I don't wanna be friends with someone who starts yelling about rape whenever they get angry at a videogame.

What are these acronyms?

[teuanjo]

Are you open for requests? If so can you do more things for Tamaki? I have an idea of fem reader x Tamaki maybe she is a year below him( they can be the same year) and she is in love with him. Maybe she’s a teachers assistant if she’s a year below so she delivers things to classes and everytime she visits class 3-a she hugs her friend( which he gets jealous of) but she smiles at him and waves. And he’s likes… “ did she just wave at me?” AND SMILE! Anyways maybe her friends being a big mouth in class explaining that we are literally infatuated with Tamaki and his reaction… thank you

Call me 🍪 anon

Big mouth strikes again.

Tamaki Amajiki X Gn!reader

¡TW!: None

A/N: sorry for the delay anon this has been in my drafts for months -_-

I didn't read it so if you see any mistakes feel free to correct me and I'm sorry if you see any female pronouns, I happen to write using she to later correct for the neutral pronoun.

Seeing you enter the room, Tamaki felt his heart skip a beat, you always came on Tuesdays mainly to deliver notices or extra activities. He should have gotten used to it by now, but still he couldn't help feeling the absolute euphoria he felt when he saw you.

Tamaki admires as you breaks into the classroom with a big smile.

"Good morning class, Director Nezu sent me here to inform that vacancies have opened for hero assistant, anyone who is interested please come forward so I can write your information."

Never letting your smile die you announce in a graceful manner making Tamaki envious of your facility speaking to the audience.

Neijire approaches and greeting you starting a conversation. Tamaki hates himself for feeling jealous of his own friend but he can't stop wishing he was in Neijire's place, hugging you and gossiping as the two smile and walk around the classroom together.

The closer you get to Tamaki's table the more intimate the conversation seems to get Neijire laughs sterically as she swings your arm back and forth.

"You know you will need to confess someday, right?"

"Yes Neijire but I don't think he wants a relationship right now."

"Don't be ridiculous Tamaki for sure-"

Putting your hand on Neijire's mouth as quickly as possible you look at her and widen your eyes turning your face slowly to see if Tamaki heard, only to see the reddest boy possible with wide eyes looking at you.

"Tamaki I'm sorry she didn't mean any of that." You try to approach him only for him to get up abruptly and rush out of the room muttering something and nearly knocking over a few chairs.

You turn to Neijire only to see that she is nowhere near you deciding that looking at the roof is much more interesting.

30 minutes passed and you felt more and more anxious for not finding Tamaki.

"Maybe he's hiding from me? Did I offend him?"

Your mind was racing but everything suddenly went silent after you heard a whimper, looking in the direction that little hiccup came from you can't see anything but lockers it would go unnoticed if it wasn't for another little hiccup that happened when you looked for a specific locker.

Approaching locker 314 you try to peek through the cracks, only to hear another whimper.

"Tamaki, is that you?" You asked with no hope of answers already directing your hand to open the lock.

As soon as the door is fully opened the first thing you see is Tamaki huddled in the locker your brain can't figure out how he got in there as as soon as he sees you he squeals and starts muttering apologies.

"Tamaki please stop it there's nothing you need to apologize for, I should be the one to apologize since my conversation with Neijire probably scared you."

Tamaki looks at you from under his lashes and shakes his head, if your ears weren't open you wouldn't hear Tamaki.

"I'm sorry for running away...I-I..."

His talk died away as he realized how attentively you were listening to him how interested and concerned you were for him, feeling shy again he hides his head between his knees.

"You have to remember what Mirio told you Tamaki you know they likes you, you just need to declare yourself back to them."

Silence reigns between you, preparing to speak again he stands up quickly looks into your eyes and screams.

"I LIKE YOU!"

Silence again, you looked stunned not being able to meet Tamaki's eyes.

"I did shit oh my god I did shit I did shit I did-"

"I like you too Tamaki..." Grabbing him by the shoulders before he took off running.

"Can I hug you?"

Tamaki was combusting he couldn't say anything but shake his head. When he felt their arms around him it was like a million butterflies exploded in his stomach.

He wrapped his arms around you burying his face in your hair.

"Do you want to go out this Friday? I'm free in the afternoon." You said giving a small smile while still hugging the boy, Tamaki mumbled something.

"I need words big boy."

You could feel the burn on Tamaki's face through your hair as he muttered a little "Yes" this time louder.

[coraniaid]

Brainstorming Different Endings To Doppelgangland

Inspired by this post (and the reply from @secretlyasummers), here are some ways that Doppelgangland could have ended that don't necessarily involve the gang cheerfully sending a soulless vampire back to her own world because she misses killing and torturing people. Would these have been any better than the canon version? No, but they'd all have annoyed me in a slightly different way.

1) Vampire!Willow doesn’t come back to the Bronze after being captured in the library.  The gang debate about what to do with her, with Willow being keen that she get to live (just as she is in canon), but when they get back to the library they discover she’s managed to break free.  Last shot of the episode is her heading out of town.  She may or may not be coming back.

1A) As in (1) but we actually get to see that our Willow deliberately left her something to help her escape (much like Xander’s Lie, this can be something she hides from the others and which seems like it should be really important but that the show only ever half-heartedly follows up on once and only in its final season)

1B) As in (1) but – tying up the episode, which began with the Mayor telling Faith he was going to have Willow killed – while heading out of town vamp!Willow runs into Faith and is staked

1C) As in (1) but – remembering who the vamps she recruited originally worked for – vamp!Willow tries to kill the Mayor to take over as Big Bad, finds out he is invincible and is (again) staked

2) Rather than kill her, our Willow offers to try to cast a spell to give her a soul.  Vamp!Willow is so disgusted by the thought of being like her dimension’s version of Angel (or, really, any universe’s version of Angel) that she stakes herself instead

2A) As in (2) but rather than kill her, our Willow casts a spell that she promises Buffy will render vamp!Willow harmless until they can figure out what to do with her.  Good news: rat!Amy now has a new friend!  (She is prone to biting but that just means she’s friendly.)

2B) As in (2) but rather than offer to give her a soul, Willow just does it without worrying about any question of  permission or consent.  (This doesn’t change the plot much, but it’s arguably much more in character.)

3) The episode’s plot plays out more or less the same but at some point Anya drops the exposition that, because the spell she and Willow carried out wasn’t done properly, in a few hours after being brought to this world vamp!Willow is going to return to her own dimension anyway.  The audience gets to hear this but the Scooby Gang doesn't  Just as Buffy and Willow are arguing about what to do with vamp!Willow, she vanishes.  Cut to her being staked by Wishverse!Oz just as in canon.

3A) As in (3) but we don’t see what happens to vamp!Willow in her own dimension, freeing up the possibility of her returning to the show again. 

4) The episode just plays out exactly as it does in canon, but we don’t get the (slightly cowardly) reveal that what the Gang did is actually fine because vamp!Willow got staked immediately anyway.  This (rightly) makes fans of the show a bit more uneasy about what the Gang chose to do. (This also makes the return of vamp!Willow in later episodes possible.)

5) Anticipating Season 4, the episode ends with D’Hoffryn showing up and saying how delighted he is by all the chaos and devastation caused by Willow’s spell.  He lets her know – much to Anya’s chagrin – that a vacancy for the post of vengeance demon has recently opened up and suggests she might be interested.  Willow is horrified and turns him down, but vampire!Willow accepts in her place and they both disappear before Anya or anyone else can do a thing about it.

6) The episode plays out exactly as it does in canon.  However, sometime in Season 4 we get another Wishverse crossover episode, this time with the Wishverse’s version of Kendra traveling to our world for some reason.  Willow cheerfully asks how the other Willow is getting on, and a horrified Kendra asks her if she’s really admitting to sending a vampire back to terrorize the population of Sunnydale (she then turns to Buffy, looks disappointed, and shakes her head: “no wonder you died”).

7) Vampire!Willow doesn’t come back to the Bronze after being captured in the library.  The gang debate about what to do with her, with Willow being keen that she get to live (just as she is in canon), but the Gang’s deliberations are interrupted by the arrival of the Wishverse version of Jesse, battle-scarred and wearing an eyepatch, who delivers a long speech about how much time and effort he has spent studying magic to bring her back to his dimension to face justice.  (Xander is conveniently out of the room for this whole thing, while it becomes obvious as the speech progresses that Buffy cannot remember who Jesse was.) After Jesse and Vampire!Willow vanish, this scene is never explained or commented on again by anyone.

[armpirate]

Kalla | Choi San || Chapter 7

MASTERLIST Previous || Next

Pairings: CEO!San x fem!reader

Genre: smut, angst, fluff, strangers to lovers.

Warnings: dom!San, sub!reader, voyeourism, use of sex toys, bondage, dirty talk, BDSM, exhibitionism, rough sex.

Summary: She was surprised by how fast her life went from the perfect fairytale to the destructive mess it had turned into. Dealing with a cheater ex boyfriend, having to move out to a different place because the house she lived in belonged to that man she once dreamed of spending the rest of her life with, while continuously being underappreciated at work... It was as if life was telling her to stop dreaming big, to go back to her small town, Bibury, and help her parents run the small farm her family had owned for decades.

At least until she received a call from her friend.

A sudden vacancy as an assistant showed up on one of her friend's system, having her being encouraged to take that big step and apply for it. She had no hopes for it. Mainly because she didn't have any experience on the field, and she didn't comply with most of the requirements that were added on the offer -and which most of them sounded ridiculous and exaggerated for the position, making her wonder who was the freak who needed so many guidelines in order to hire someone to pick up the phone and schedule events. 

Although that hotel she'd be working on was much more than anything she could've come up with. 

Choi San wasn't someone easy to deal with. After his previous assistant presented his resignation letter on his desk, he felt forced to start the whole selection process again -after merely two months. 

Sure that he was being way too strict, enough to find that anyone who applied for the position wasn't enough, he asked one of his friends to be in charge of the interviews and the selection of the most adequate candidate. 

Little did he know Wooyoung would hire the imperfectly perfect candidate for him, sure that she'd help him in many ways other than just in dealing with the responsibilities of his position. 

A new challenge will come their way as soon as she steps inside the hotel. 

Y/n will have to learn how to mold onto him and deal with all his small habits and requirements, and San will find himself trying to open up and let out all those same things that turned him into the person he was. 

The more she digs in Kalla and all of its secrets and exciting corners, the deeper she'll dive into San's heart and soul... Although, maybe, she won't be able to take it. 

Kalla opens its doors to you, sharing the vast amount of filthy and erotic plans it offers, and that you can join with a partner... Or maybe just by yourself. 

Hope you enjoy your stay.

Chapter duration: 14 minutes

Chapter warnings: Mentions of deepthroat, mouth fucking, domination

Her alarm sounded different than other days as she turned it off and sat in the middle of the mattress, staring at the black screen of the TV. She was deeply thinking about her life, and what took her to get where she was in that moment. It was tough, she wasn't in her place, but it was so exciting and motivating, that she couldn't help but smile down as she squeezed the sheets in her hands.

Oh, even if she didn't get to be a permanent worker there, the experience of moving out to a whole different country, with all the new tasks she was going to do, was enough to kick off her career and look forward to what the future was holding out for her.

She walked past her suitcases, thinking that she'd probably unpack the few outfits she'd use those few days she'd stay there, until she managed to find somewhere else to live. As soon as she got to Seoul, she closed herself in that small office and didn't get out of there until it was too late to even think of doing anything else that wasn't sleeping.

Despite forcing her body into the time difference, she could feel how it was resisting it. Finding herself too tired to go on with daily tasks, but not sleepy to get her body that needed rest.

A shower, a quick motivating stare into the mirror after dressing up, and she was getting ready to get downstairs and start her real first day in her new job.

As Wooyoung recommended her, she moved inside the office twenty minutes earlier. Since San's door to his office was closed, she assumed that he just wasn't there yet and she managed to successfully get there ahead of him.

Nothing mattered more than a good impression.

Her table was filled with the small notes she managed to write down the previous night, before her head started swinging in the air as tiredness started getting the best of her. All of them went from being thrown messily over the black mat to being strategically positioned, so she'd be able to read them all in case she needed it.

She frowned, being sure that the language in her computer was in Korean when she first turned it on the previous day, to find it all turned into English as she attempted to scroll through her email feed. She went from the e-mail to her calendar, to the database, to find out everything was in a whole different language than what she saw the previous day. Although she didn't think about it too deeply as she went back to the e-mail site, thinking of what was the next step to do.

Mingi explained everything to her, but he also said she'd only know what to do once work started. He could only explain some tasks, without going too deeply into them because there wasn't anything to really explain then.

There was no administrative task pending, no accounting she needed to do... That man kept everything as up to date as possible.

The squeeze in her chest made her jump in her seat, while being aware of the way her face broke down, when she heard the click of the door behind her back, picking up the white sheets of paper that were positioned at the top right corner of her desk and lifting her arm in a defensive way.

Her body instantly relaxed when she saw San looking at her with that impassive look he had the previous day, too, making her wonder if that poker face was also part of being the director of such a big hotel.

—Were you going to make me bleed out with a paper cut? —his eyes never left hers as he doubted her weapon choice.

She could've picked one of the pens, or the big stapler at her left, yet she still went for the most useless thing, the pile of sheets, only because they were the first thing that caught her eyes.

Her hand lowered slowly, placing the pile back to where it was, before she crossed her hands on her lap and bowed to him with a concerned expression.

—I didn't know you were here.

—I'm always here half an hour earlier —he explained.

Why? She didn't know. He was the owner, it wasn't like he needed to impress anyone, or worry about anyone's thoughts.

—Oh, really? —she smiled nervously.

But he still showed not a single bit of expression, which made her wonder if there was something wrong with him. He extended his hand to her, offering the file he was holding and two thin books.

—Make a copy of those papers, and upload them to the system —he asked.

As she moved the file to look at the books, she frowned when she saw they were language books. More specifically, Korean learning books.

—Use them whenever you don't have work —he demanded—. Even if it's just five minutes, study.

He started to sound like her father.

—How much were they? I can pay them back...

—It won't be necessary —he interrupted her—. Wooyoung hired you, knowing your Korean is even worse than a five year old. It's my responsibility to make sure you have all the tools to learn it.

But not really.

She wouldn't have been surprised if she had been told to start learning it by herself. Actually, it started off that way the two weeks prior to getting there. He didn't have to buy her any books.

—In the office, you will speak to me only in Korean. Starting from today —he tilted his head.

—And what if I don't? —she mirrored his pose, tilting her head in the same direction.

She was aware of how challenging her tone sounded, only when it was too late. And, instead of correcting it, she chose to stand her ground.

—From now on it's part of your obligations as my assistant. Not doing it would be missing a task, and missing a task is an infraction. Three infractions, and you're out —he commented.

—But how am I going to speak to you properly?

—I didn't say it had to be properly, just use the language —he shrugged.

He knew better than anyone how the best way to learn a language was to be forced to use it. It happened when he moved to London with zero knowledge of English, and he went from making simple phrases while sounding like a caveman, to being able to keep up with a professional conversation related to the project he was working on back then.

He couldn't take it easy on her even if he wanted to. If any of the investors found out that the person in charge of supporting him, and being the first voice and face with anyone related to the company, didn't even speak Korean, they probably wouldn't care to kick her out. And it wasn't like he genuinely cared about her being kicked out, but he didn't want to get back to the headache of hiring someone.

—Apart from those copies, is there something else I should do? —she changed the topic, finally giving it up and accepting her new task— Mingi explained the tasks to me, but told me you'd be the one giving me work.

—Hmm, do those copies —he pointed at the file—, and later try to schedule a meeting with Richard Jones. I need to meet up with him before the day ends. I'll also be away for thirty minutes, so if someone calls, tell them to leave a message or wait for later.

San didn't even say goodbye or hint at him leaving, before he started walking towards the door. Being left completely alone again, she turned back to the open door of his office, aware of how he also left it open when he left earlier the previous day. So that was the hint she needed to know whether he was there or not: if he was, the door would be closed.

The first week in a new job was always so strange for her. Always out of place, with a tiny bit of discomfort, while trying to guess what was the next step to take and when she'd manage to look like she had been doing that for years. She always got to that point, regardless of the job, but it just was difficult to find herself a place where she wasn't meant to be. Compared to her previous job, and with the language pressure as a complement, she was sure she'd need to give way more than what she had to manage to impress San enough.

And she didn't even think about the place where she'd stay the time she lived there, because clearly she wouldn't stay in that hotel forever.

San showed up forty minutes later, with a darker expression and a heavier aura. He didn't need to speak, his mood made the environment get almost asphyxiating as soon as he crossed the door, and his expression went from neutral to angry.

She knew he wasn't mad at her, basically because he seemed fine before he left. But she still felt intimidated by the way he walked towards her desk, stopping at the side before he started speaking in Korean.

—Did you copy the files?

Y/n blinked once, instantly feeling overwhelmed while she tried to fight that urge to show it off. Her eyes moved around the table, trying to understand what he meant.

—The files —he spoke slower—, did you copy them? —he then pointed to the small printer at her left.

—Ah —she felt so proud of herself for finally being able to get a hold of what he was saying, that she couldn't hide her smile—, yeah —she answered in Korean, handing him the file he had given her before.

But he didn't say anything else. Instead, he picked up the folder and went back to his office, closing the door behind him.

If that was how it was going to be, she was so damned.

Her mind was working at a speed that it was difficult to handle for her, hearing the electronic voice of the translator replying in her head everything that was said while she attempted to keep in order all the documentation she needed to get to feel completely in peace. Her head was close to blowing up after all the stress she went through with just the request, just to later add more after she went to the bank Wooyoung recommended her two days back. She was so lucky the lady still wanted to meet up with her after being fifteen minutes late, because she got lost in the subway. Just for it to happen again on her way back to Kalla.

She had no strength to carry her bag, which was almost dragging across the floor as she walked back inside the building. The tiredness, and how dark it was outside, made the lights seem even brighter as she stepped closer, with that luxurious vibes almost escaping the crystal doors that were being pushed for her as she got closer. And she was then finally aware of the big calla flower tracing the curve of the stairs towards the first floor, and that she didn't quite appreciate the previous day, because she got engaged on a phone call as soon as she stepped inside the hotel and Wooyoung left her to go looking for San.

That was her workplace, maybe a bit deeper than that surface. But she was working there, as surrealistic as it seemed for her.

She stopped, looking around for somewhere where she could have a drink. Technically, she was allowed to drink there. As soon as she stepped outside of those four walls, out of her working hours, she was a guest just like anyone else there. And she was a guest that needed to shush her thoughts with something else than just meditation.

Her walk towards the reception was tired, still dragging her heels every once in a while, before she stopped at the long black ceramic counter.

—How may I help you?

The girl looked so neat in comparison to her. Her hair was perfectly tied at the back with a low ponytail, and her make up seemed untouched as she smiled brightly at her.

—Hmm. Is there somewhere where I could have something to drink? —Y/n asked.

—Well, there's the restaurant, which it's open until twelve —she suggested.

—But isn't there something else? A bit more dedicated to that? —Y/n insisted, sure that Wooyoung and Mingi had told her that there was somewhere that served alcoholic drinks when the restaurant was closed.

She wanted a place where could feel that she wasn't the only one who wanted to taste that bitter drink to wash away her worries and stress, she needed to feel like she wasn't the only one in that state.

—Oh —the receptionist smiled as if she finally understood what she meant—. There is something, indeed. May I have your room number?

—2 0 4 —she said, trying to avoid the confusion.

—Here you have —she finally nodded.

A few minutes later, two of her fingers raised over the counter to offer her a black plastic card.

—Walk past the stairs, behind there will be a wide door. Show this to the person there, and they'll explain to you how it works.

She just wanted a glass of Gintonic, what was that thing with cards and secret codes?

She still started walking, following the path that the girl had pointed out until she found a serious man guarding the door. She found herself having to give up all of her belongings, after giving the card to the lady that was waiting at the wardrobe. She had wondered what that hole was for at the top, only to have that question answered when she placed a chain on it so she'd be able to hang it on her wrist.

—This card will charge whatever you order to your hotel room —she mentioned—. Once you leave, you come back here, show me the card so I know which ones are your things, and I'll return them to you.

Although Y/n nodded, she didn't quite understand what was going on with all that security. It was a normal pub, why couldn't she just take her bag with her and pay for her drinks with her own money? If that was a way to scare customers away, San was definitely doing the right job.

The establishment was dark on the first few steps she took after the door opened for her, similar to the small corner where she had left all of her things, and which created a huge contrast with the bright lightning of the rest of the hotel crossing that arch. There weren't a lot of people there, but most of them were sitting in pairs or in small groups, with only a few wandering around by themselves. And she was about to be one of those, after she started making her way to the counter to order something to drink.

There was a small stage at the center, surrounded by some burgundy couches that surrounded it, and by the light bulbs at the top she imagined it was because they held shows there.

San just sat there, finding some way to disconnect after the long day it had been. Meeting his father first thing in the morning wasn't the best idea if he aimed to have a peaceful day, and being forced to speak to one of the investors in England because he suddenly felt too important to be treated like any other person involved in Kalla.

He just wanted to have a drink, and get drunk of the sex atmosphere before he thought of going back home to start his day again. It was ironic how he created that place, yet he hadn't been able to enjoy it for months.

His eyes flew around the room, at some point feeling jealous of those couples that weren't able to keep their hands off each other, or those people that shared intentional glances from across the room. He wished he were able to do just that for once, but his need to solidify some kind of trust was bigger than the lust screaming from his inside.

His back tensed when he was able to recognize the outfit of the woman standing near the door, looking around while she played with the card hanging on her thin wrist. He had to double check, hoping it wasn't her; but the more he focused on her, the clearer it was that it was indeed Y/n.

She was determined to get to the counter, and order something to drink, but suddenly she found her way hindered by a wide chest that barely allowed her to see over his shoulder.

—Excuse me, I... —the words got stuck in her throat as she lifted her eyes and saw San staring down at her.

Why did she always end up finding him that way?

—What are you doing here?

—Taking a drink —she frowned—. Why? Is this not allowed for workers, or what?

—You can't be here.

Workers actually weren't forbidden from stepping there outside of working hours, but for some reason it didn't sit well with him to see her there.

—I can't be... Why? Is there some policy or something? —she challenged him— I just want a drink, and I'll go.

—Y/n, it's an order.

—Too bad you aren't my boss out of working hours —she clapped back—. So I'll pretend you spoke in Korean, and I didn't understand what you said.

And just like that, she walked past him and headed towards the counter to order something to drink.

The first few minutes she tried to focus on anything that wasn't San and his piercing gaze, that was drilling through her skull as he walked back to the seat he was taking before she bursted inside the place. But later her eyes fell on the small stage, and the woman dressed in lingerie that was getting up there under the spotlight.

She remembered the type of hotel she was working at in that exact moment, and how Wooyoung mentioned how it wasn't similar to the ones she was used to. With that information, and the image in front of her, it only made sense that it was going to be some type of erotic or suggestive show.

Her thoughts slowly shifted, from curious and engaged, to uncomfortable and excited at the same time when the man that later joined her pushed her on her knees by the hair, forcing his hard dick in her mouth. She could perfectly hear her gags and her gasps for air as soon as he pulled her head back. Her body jumped at the sudden slap on her face, coming so out of nowhere that she wasn't sure it was planned.

But it was.

The woman moved forward to his dick as if she was desperate for it, being stopped by his hand on her hair so he could lean and spit inside her mouth, sliding his dick back inside and thrusting into it senseless.

Y/n didn't even wait for her drink to be placed in front of her, she quickly hopped off her chair and made her way outside to get all of her things and try to forget what she saw.

What the hell was that place?

[scoupsahoy]

if anyone remembers my shiner fic: the shame is on the other side, it's been adapted into a podfic read by @rufusbear !!!! i just listened to it this morning and it was crazy good

here's a snippet for anyone who hasn't read it or wants a refresher!

-

It starts out almost innocently. Only almost, because Steve is self-destructive by nature, and he already has a fake ID, and he’s feeling reckless and concussed and entirely alone.

Running away to Indianapolis the weekend the world almost ends for the second time in two years is not a coincidence.

He doesn’t know anyone in Indianapolis. He hardly knows anyone in Hawkins, not really, not anymore, and he’s young and stupid but he figures: nobody would recognize him out there, not even his parents have seen his bloody eye. He wants to go to a place where monsters don't exist and people don’t care about him and drink and dance and stop thinking for once.

Steve Harrington leaves Hawkins without a girlfriend, without friends, completely alone. It’s par for the course, he thinks, he’s always completely alone. His head is still pounding and his ear is almost constantly ringing now, but God, he needs to get out.

And he had intended to start bar-hopping. Play the field. Never stay anywhere long enough to get caught. He’s never gone out anywhere without Tommy Hagan, hardly knows where to start. He parks his car at the first motel with vacancy in the city, slinks down alleys with a hoodie covering his face so he doesn’t raise any attention. Steve is good at that, not raising attention. Not letting people see him.

Nobody looks, anyway.

This is the innocence: There’s a somewhat crowded bar crouched underneath a sex shop, mixed in with other bars. There’s no line to get in this one as far as he can see, and seems small enough that he could get lost in the sea of people in their varying states of glamor.

That should be the first hint. Really. The sparkling dresses and tight bodices and exceedingly plain clothes and lingerie, all rubbing up against each other. Glitter and music he knows is loud but can’t quite hear, and a smattering of strong men with their arms crossed outside like they’re on guard.

But Steve Harrington is seventeen and from the middle of nowhere, and it takes an hour of dancing, a shot of tequila, and a tall man with fake eyelashes offering a drink when he makes it to the bar for him to realize where he is.

“I’m sorry?” His hearing has been degrading pretty steadily since the fight with Billy, but that’s not what makes him ask for clarification.

The man with the eyelashes hunches down just a bit, and enunciates clearly, gently, sweetly. “Can I get you something to drink, dear?”

Steve nods. It’s about all his brain will do.

And he doesn’t freak out. Actually, he does almost the opposite of freak out. It’s like his brain stills in his head, and the pounding and ringing isn’t gone but it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t bother him.

Maybe he thinks this is what death is. Maybe that says a lot more about him than he’s ready to unpack just yet.

He’s being spoken to again, and he thinks fuck it and takes his hood down, angles his head towards the person buying his drink so he can hear better, and the response he gets is different from the one he got from the guy at the front desk of the motel.

It’s sad.

“What happened to you?” His voice is gentle, and he raises his hand slowly to cup the air around Steve’s cheek, like he’s caressing it, like he’s soothing it, but like he won’t touch without permission.

Steve stares dumbly. “It’s fine. I got into a fight.”

The man looks at him intensely. “Are you safe?"

“I’m sorry?”

“I don’t know where you’re coming from, sweetheart, but are you safe there?”

It takes Steve a good minute to respond. Not because of the music or the ringing in his ears. He’s just not sure anyone’s asked that before.

The answer, of course, is no, there are monster dogs and racists with bats and a gateway to hell where I’m from , but Steve feels so small under this man’s gaze. And so big. Like it fucking matters if he’s safe.

Somewhere swimming in the corner of his vision he sees kids as young as him. He wonders if they’re safe too. Almost on instinct. Wonders if tall men with makeup and gentle voices cradle their bruised jaws and actually do something to make them safe.

Steve isn’t stupid. He knows what people say about places like this and people like these. Maybe he’s naive for not turning and running out, but he’s had run-ins with monsters and demons already in his life, and there’s only so much running he can do.

“Yeah, it’s fine,” he says, finally, quiet.

Steve’s actually not sure he’s been this quiet in his life. He figures some of the hesitation has to do with the nature of the place, but. He doesn’t think about the rest. It occurs to him that no one would look for him here, and no one would find him. There’s something freeing in that.

“It’s water,” the man says, shaking Steve from his thoughts, his quiet gaze around the bar, sliding a glass that he didn’t even notice was ordered for him. “I’m sorry for not introducing myself. I’m Jack. Is this your first time here?”

“Yeah.”

He gets a smile in response. “You should stay hydrated. Water’s free, isn’t it, Pat?”

The bartender, Pat, he guesses, takes a look at Steve and raises an eyebrow. His arms are bare, like the November in Indiana cold doesn’t affect him, and he runs a cloth around the inside of a pint glass. “Quite the shiner you’ve got there, kid.”

“That’s what I said.”

The look Pat gives him should feel judgemental, but it doesn’t. “Water’s free. Tell your friends.”

Steve’s test tightens. He drinks the water in front of him. He thinks about what his dad’s told him about queers and AIDS over the top of his stiff newspaper on mornings that Steve manages to see him before he goes to work. He thinks about the punch he got when he called Jonathan a queer and the way Nancy looked at him like she was sick, and the way Tommy looked at him like he was proud. He thinks about how Nancy’s talked about Will before, like she’s worried for him, because their town is small and fucked up and scary for a kid who can’t hide. And he looks at Jack and Pat and he thinks: man fuck that.

“I will,” he says, even though his friends are a group of thirteen year olds, and that’s only if he’s being really really generous with the word.

He goes off, then, like he has friends, and lets his brain really turn off for the night. His arms and legs release all of the monster hunting tension, he relaxes into the vibration of the music, the bass as it shakes the floor, dances by himself until exhaustion truly hits him. Boys don’t come too close, no one does.

No one ever asks his name, so he doesn’t give them one. He doesn’t know what he would have told them if they had asked. Steve is a common name, but it’s so personal, it’s tied to Hawkins, it’s not fit for this.

He’s never not been Steve Harrington.

By the end of the night he’s sober and tired and a drag queen, a fucking drag queen , offers to walk him to the train or to his house, or just halfway up a block the back way so no one knows he came from the gay club. He lets her, just up half the block, and she stays a safe distance away from him. Her name, or what everyone calls her, is Jewel, fitting to the rhinestones on her blazer and the sparkle in her eye.

Steve takes his right turn and Jewel calls after him quietly, voice deep and feminine and nice, “stay safe, Shiner.”

find the rest here ❤️

[madam-melon-meow]

The Good The Bad and The Alternative: chapter 6, an excerpt;

John got up and looked out of Dave's window. The rain didn't seem too bad.

"Do you wanna go somewhere, or something?" John asked. Dave stood up immediately.

"Shit man yeah I was just about to ask, Rose wants me to translate some shit and I need a book from a friend. I didn't want to drag you anywhere or nothing. Get it fuckin' moving, I haven't hung out in my apartment this long since before the apocalypse. Hard to chill or dick around on the internet when eighty percent of it doesn't exist anymore." Dave followed John while talking, the two of them getting their shit together.

They were clomping down the stairs a few moments later, the sound of their descent echoing through the heights of the stairwell.

"God, is that elevator getting fixed anytime soon?" John asked after they finally hit the ground floor.

"Probably the day after Bro gets back. Most issues seem to only get fixed when he complains about them. Sometimes feels like we're the only ones living in this whole damn building. Everyone else is a fucking ghost or something." John saw a middle-aged woman with grocery bags walk past the pair of them, looking annoyed, but Dave either purposefully ignored her or didn't take notice. "A couple of people prolly are ghosts though, that's why we got so many vacancies. No other reason to pass on this sweet ass property."

"What about the lines?" John said it before he could stop himself.

"What lines?" Dave asked, seeming genuinely oblivious. "It's not exactly the busiest area, shit, I mean maybe the lines outside the clubs." John decided if there was anyone he could trust to ask this question it was Dave.

"No I mean, like-" They stepped outside, Dave leading him towards a bus stop. John looked back at the exterior of the highrise. "I saw lines on your apartment building, they were glowing and moving and stuff. It looked like those magic runes Rose is always talking about, but really magic. I thought I was going crazy, but then they disappeared and I haven't seen them since."

Dave started walking backwards to look at the building, his face hiking up in a squint.

"Can't say I've seen any shit like that, anybody else notice? Did it look like some kind of evil fucking wizard was about to blow up our apartment or was laying some kind of trap?" Dave asked.

John shrugged.

"I don't know. It just kinda felt powerful. It looked like maybe some kind of inscription… Oh! Do you remember in Oblivion, the book you needed to get to Paradise? It was like the mystery-"

"The Mysterium Xarxes yeah I remember that shit. Fucking Jeelius, man."

"Yeah! It looked like the inside of that, but huge and glowing yellow on the outside of your building."

Dave whistled.

"I mean shit. Could be anything. Could be those wards my Bro mentioned." He said, offhandedly.

"Wards? Dave what wards?" John interrogated as he started walking faster.

"He said something about the building being protected by a shitload of magic, for structural integrity and expulsion of evil, I don't know man that shit went over my head. You probably shouldn't be able to see it, though." John was only more confused, and expressed it through various noises to Dave. "Yeah, he said something like, only magic users experienced with advanced divinity could detect the wards. He sounded proud of it so I guess it's pretty fucking powerful." Dave seemed unperturbed by the whole situation.

"OK, cool, dude." John gestured at himself. "Why am I seeing your bro's ubermegapower-wards?"

Want to see what happens next? Read on:

[elvenbeard]

I chose "Numb".

Thanks so much for asking!! :D

This is the story of the night of Vince running away from home, June 9th 2067! Ooof I'm having a hard time picking a favourite section from this, cause this was one of my favourite chapters to write, but also one of the hardest and darkest of that fic so far ;_; Little bit of a content warning, but Vince is really depressed and suicidal at that point, even if he wouldn't openly admit it. For context, it's utterly pouring, he just spent the last hour or so walking around, trying to figure out where to go because he packed his things and left in a hurry before his mother would come back home. He's worried she will somehow track him down and so takes a moment to sit down and blocks all his contacts as a first step to prevent anyone from his old life from reaching out to or finding him.

Every couple of flicks and blocks he had to wipe off the rain that accumulated on the screen, and even though his fingers were getting stiff from the cold he continued on through the list until he was sure he’d severed all ties for the moment. To properly reset the phone without losing any important data he’d need a dry place though, and some equipment, a computer ideally really, so this had to do for now. Finally, he reached the very bottom of what was now basically a long blocklist. His finger hovered over the final name, and he’d almost reflexively blocked him as well. He sniffled and reconsidered. “Welles, Jackie” said the last gleaming entry. He’d never called or texted him after that night. The fear that Jackie was just trying to make use of him somehow, like everyone else he knew, had just weighed too heavily on the pro- and contra-list. And even if he’d called him, what would he have said? “Thanks again for taking me back home to my abusive mother! She’s even more of a control freak meanwhile! How have you been?” No, even just thinking that… wasn’t fair. But then again, what was fair and unfair? Was it unfair that he was sitting on the curb now, in a puddle of his own misery, or was this exactly where he had been headed to the entire time? Was it fair to drag the Valentino kid into an even bigger mess than what he’d gotten himself into back in March, when he spoke up for a stranger he pitied?  Vincent’s finger continued to hover over the block button. Fair and unfair didn’t exist in Night City, neither did pity. There was no right, no wrong, only choices, decisions to make… and living with the consequences, as best as you managed.

He ends up calling Jackie, and after a little back and forth, Jackie comes by to pick him up and drives him to a relatively safe and discreet hotel he knows.

The exterior was a murky green color, the paint on the balcony railings peeling off, most windows on the lower levels boarded up. The sign above the entrance was flashing “vacancy”, to no-one’s surprise, and Jackie turned off his bike’s engine. “I know it doesn’t look like much,” he said, following Vincent’s unimpressed gaze, “But it’s better on the inside than it looks. Also discreet, and in walking distance to Kabuki Roundabout, where you’ll find literally everything you’re ever gonna need, for cheap.” Vincent hesitated to get off the bike, still clinging to Jackie’s rain-soaked bomber jacket. “The offer still stands to come back home with me, too, if you’ve changed your mind,” Jackie said softly after a couple of moments, “And if not today, tomorrow. Or next week. You’re always welcome.” Vincent tried to swallow down another onset of tears, then he got up from the motorbike, his backpack making the whole procedure look a lot less smooth than what he was going for. “Thank you, Jackie,” he said, “I know, and I hope you know, too, you don’t need to do any of this.” “Oh, I know, don’t worry,” Jackie said, smiling softly, “But you know, maybe next time I’ll be the one calling you from a bad place, and you’re able to help a friend out, right?” Vincent’s heart sank. “Right,” he nodded. Of course. That’s how things worked in Night City. You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours. He was naïve to assume Jackie did this out of the good of his heart. “Okay then,” Jackie sighed, “Anything else you need? Cash, advice? Been told I have a good shoulder to cry on, too.” Vincent chuckled weakly but kept his distance. “I’ll be fine,” he said, and Jackie also nodded. “Gimme a call in the morning, V,” he said as he turned the engine back on, “Or I’m gonna come by and make you.” He flashed another brief smile at him before taking off again, the taillight of his bike a red haze still visible from afar through the veil of rain. Vincent remained standing where he was for another five or so minutes, so numb from everything that had happened, he didn’t even care anymore. Then he slowly turned around to the hotel and walked into the small, dimly lit lobby. There was no human receptionist, only a type of vending machine that spat out room keycards. Very old-fashioned, but also cash only, and at least that would work out in his favor. He looked over his shoulder, making sure he was alone, before setting his backpack down and opening it. He had buried the black plastic box once holding his now completely ruined boots under a couple of layers of clothes, everything quickly picked at random. Now it contained all the money he had left in the world, carefully set aside over the course of the last few months. He still couldn’t believe he'd gotten away with it, that his mother had not figured it out sooner. He’d had no chance yet to count it, only knew a rough estimate. But even then, that only gave him a vague idea of how long it might last him on his own. He pulled out a few notes, enough to rent a room for a week for now. By then he’d hopefully have figured out how to move forward.

And in the end a little paragraph on what Vince in that moment would probably title "be careful what you wish for" - but even if his situation is dire in that moment, in the long run it was for the best, he just can't see it yet.

Somewhat absentmindedly his fingers brushed across the small bruise on his thigh, just below where his boxers ended. Unbelievable really how the tiny mark the injection had left, barely noticeable unless you knew exactly what to look out for, had escalated everything so badly, so quickly. He had wished for this to be the first real step in finally setting himself free, living more truly to who he was… and somehow his wish had simultaneously come true and backfired spectacularly. Yes, he was free now, free of his controlling mother, free of any expectations and rules his world had put on him… but also free of his health insurance, free of the funds to pay for the next shot, free of the ability to go wherever he liked without fearing to run into her, ready to drag him back by force. Free of a home. Free of everything that he had taken for granted and clung to with all his might, despite it slowly killing him from the inside…

kölajsdfhdasfsaf I kinda wanna just share the whole chapter, but I think these bits are some of my favourites, although there is a lot more and a lot more details that are dear to me too. I picked out the location of the hotel in game for example, driving around Kabuki for hours looking for a good and logical spot where it could be XD And the bridge where he sits in the beginning blocking all his contacts also holds so much symbolism to me as like... it's the connecting path between Westbrook and Heywood, corpo and streetkid, Vince and Jackie, his old and his new life, so it makes sense for them to reconnect there that night. Also, it is also visible from the Darkmatter rooftop, and when Vince sees it again from up there years later, remembers that for a splitsecond he thought about jumping off of it that night, he is so grateful again that he didn't and instead chose to continue against all odds.

So yes. A very important chapter xD Sorry, this got long!

[moondays]

Mirror

It came across my mind that I already lived in Japan for 9 years, since April 2014. I came to Japan as a student, with little goals and not so impressive achievements. I only intended to study Japanese, to allow myself being more confident by speaking the language more fluently. It took some times, too. I just realized then that I did not only have troubles in learning language, but in learning about myself also.

I finished Japanese Language School in 2 years, great. But what so not great was, I still felt as an outcast. I felt unwanted, somehow. Even though my homeroom teacher asked me to pursue Master Degree, I felt that he doubted me a lot. But I followed his instructions, as well as doing my own research, I got into the university without failing.

And then I graduated the Master Degree in 2 years, awesome. The degree that I never intended to pursue and extending my stay in Japan, I couldn't believe myself, either. Back to my emotions, I felt empty again and question myself: What now? If I went home, I didn't think I had anything left at home and I was already over 30 at that time. But if I continued, what did I have and deserved to continue here?

I finally got a job after 1 year of job hunting. I actually gave up in the end, because my visa was going to expire in 3 months. But my brother told me that, whenever there is a chance, just take it without thinking too hard. I heard a job vacancy from an old friend and eventually tried going for it, even though I didn't think I had the requirements in social skills.

Eventually, I got my social skills honed up in this company. And looking back, I am already 4 years being employed. It came to me that there were so many changes in me happened in the last 4 years. I would say, the biggest change I had was when Puma came to my life. He adopted me and he taught me to be more patient and caring.

I also got support from the people around me. They were also being kind to me, letting me know that I can count on them any time. I guess, knowing that people need me and vice-versa gives the change in people's heart. I used to be so cold, colder than ice. I treated people without caring for their emotions and people would treat me back in the same way. Even I didn't treat myself warm enough.

I didn't know know what it was to love myself, to be myself. All I knew was if I please people, I would be able to avoid conflicts. I also didn't know what I really wanted in my life, felt like no originality at all.

But, then I started to open up to myself. Forcing myself to leave the comfort zone a little and be braver to embrace whatever was coming towards me. Also, finding the right people to talk about your insecurities and not being judged or even compared to is very important. I used to be afraid of losing some people when I was already being dependent on them. But if at certain points I knew it was going to make me less happier when I'm not happy already, then I should let go and give some space. If the person was meant to be with us, so be it. If they don't, so be it. Because I think I would be the same to anyone else.

So, for the last 9 years living abroad by myself, I have been learning a lot. Nothing comes instantly, everything needs a process. Whether it's the way I look upon myself or the way I think towards other people. Some people deserve to be waited for, some people deserve to be left for right away. Try to be patient but it is okay to express emotions at times.

[endlesscrimson89]

FFXIV Write2023, Prompt 23: Suit.

[New AU]

Senri hardly ever felt like he fit anywhere, much less when stuffed into a borrowed, expensive suit that was just that side of unpleasantly tight in strategic places. He fought not to let any of his inner anxiety show in his expression as he let his pale eyes drift across the massive, beautifully decorated interior of the lobby while avoiding looking at the assistant - or whomever the blonde female was in this building - that seemed bent to expose her cleavage at him whenever his eyes landed anywhere in her vicinity. 

Normally he would simply shoot her down with short but to the point, 'Don't bother, I'm gay,' but he was quite interested in the vacancy that brought him here, so he kept his trap shut, hoping she would get a clue on her own... eventually. 

The job offer seemed perfect for him, considering it asked for nothing more than for the candidate to be 'well-built' and experienced in combat, so his best friend, Alisaie, who shoved it in his face after he wailed at being fired again, was convinced he could pull it off. The company - Allag Corp - was reputable and well-respected in the city, and she apparently knew the guy who was offering that gig, so she was convinced he wouldn't be faced with his usual... issues. 

The company was famous for developing ultra-advanced technologies based on the use of aether, and Alisaie’s buddy, who looked for security due to some ridiculous threats, she assured Senri, was a nice, meek guy who wouldn't fire him because so his miserable mug. Or, to be more precise: the miserable effect his stupid face had on people around him. 

Ever since he was a little kit, his stupid face brought him nothing but trouble. He was only lucky that his older brother shared his affliction, so as soon as Senri grew big enough, Ares made sure to teach him how to protect himself. Both of his older brothers were extremely protective of him - the baby of the family - but they could only do so much, too. 

Alisaie was his first and only real friend, and by the time they met - in college - he was beyond burned on anyone who paid too much attention to his face. 

Especially women, because a scary number of those believed that his sexuality was too much of a loss and they could cure him of it... and some wouldn't take no for an answer, either. 

He got some crushes over the years, obviously,  but it never went anywhere because who would want to deal with the bullshit his appearance brought about? Ares was single, too, for the same reason, despite having a tad more leeway with being bisexual - and cynical as fuck. 

In college, he heard his classmates countless times say how much would love to change with him - and he used to react to that with nothing more than a wry smirk, knowing that if they knew the truth of it, perhaps they wouldn't be so kin to do that. 

His work record was another example of his rotten luck, too - because apparently, when you look like him, you're somehow obliged to put up with constant sexual harassment. Because people laughed when he complained or thought he should be happy about horny bitches pawing at him whenever in arm's reach. 

And he tried to put up with it, he did... until his last boss, an older and married woman, downright threw herself at him and then fired his ass when he balked. 

That was a month ago, and looking at his thinning savings, he was getting a tad desperate and much less picky - if still refusing to go anywhere where women were in charge. He was far too sick of that bullshit!

"Mister Mallory will see you now, sir," the blonde chirped, and Senri blinked, getting back to reality. He sighed and stood up, then fixed the lapels of the borrowed, black suit and sent her a weak, strained smile on the way to the door of the office. She beamed, exposing her breasts even more obviously, but he ignored it, knocking briefly and heading inside while steeling his back and pushing his chest forward. Usually, he strived to keep his massive height and build as non-threatening as possible, but considering the nature of this gig and the pay Alisaie mentioned? 

Hell, he wanted it bad!

"...sir?" He said gruffly toward a surprisingly small figure slouched over a pile of papers covering a massive desk below the floor-to-ceiling windows showing the panorama of the city below. Despite Senri being invited in, the redheaded figure flinched as if surprised, and then a pair of shockingly ruby eyes shot toward him with an adorably owlish look at a handsome if quite as surprisingly young face. 

If that man was older than him, it couldn’t be by much. And again, he wondered how Alisaie knew someone in charge of this company. 

"Ah..." A Seeker, like him, blinked those ruby eyes at him, gave him a quick once-over, and then leaned back, clearing his throat. "...Senri?" He fixed glasses on his nose, their frames somehow, even more, accenting that baffling... cuteness if his expression remained curiously unreadable when he pointed toward one of the chairs set on the opposite side of his desk. "Please, sit down?" His voice was calm if carrying this interesting, soothing quality that sounded like silk for Senri’s ears. 

"Um, yeah..." he complied, though trying to keep his nerves at bay when the redhead folded his hands together atop the papers in front of him, still watching him with that impassive expression. 

Alisaie said that she 'vouched' for him, but he wasn't sure if he had already somehow screwed up... or something, because as much as he disliked the usual reaction to his appearance, its seemingly complete lack here... unnerved him a bit. 

"Alisaie assured me that she thoroughly explained what this... gig would require?" The man said calmly, and Senri nodded, clearing his throat a bit nervously.

"Y-Yeah, she did," he fought himself not to tug at his tie, as suddenly it somehow seemed much warmed inside the spacious, beautifully decorated room. "If I still don’t exactly understand, why wouldn't you hire a professional... sir?" it felt weird to address like that someone who looked very much his age, but... he really needed this job if he didn’t plan to make it too obvious... unless forced to. "She told me it's about some... gala?" 

"Professional?" The redhead blinked twice, then tilted his head with a slightly suspicious smirk. "There seems to be some misunderstanding... Considering the situation, it's of utmost importance - for me - for the whole thing to be... discreet," he accentuated, then sighed at the sight of lack of understanding on Senri’s face. "Let me guess... Alisaie failed to mention that if you would be interested in this... job, I would need you to pretend to be my boyfriend?" He drawled with amusement and thinned his plush lips when Senri's jaw dropped. "...I guess not."

"...huh?" He finally gasped in thought swearing he would wrangle his best friend’s scrawny neck the next time he saw her. "B-Boyfriend? She made it sound... I mean, I thought it was about... protection. Like bodyguard type of thing?"

The redhead blinked again, slowly, and his smirk turned into a sort of comforting smile that had Senri relax involuntarily, leaning back in the impossibly comfortable seat. 

"It is, however..." the man's expression appeared somewhat sheepish with his next words as the hands in front of him seemed to tighten their grip. Was he nervous? "...it's very important for me that my family - who will be present at the said gala - does not realize that I felt the need to seek out this sort of... arrangement. My older brother, whom this occasion is to celebrate, can be quite... overprotective - to the extremes - and I rather avoid gaining his attention. Hence, when Alisaie assured me she knows someone perfect for the job..." he trailed off meaningfully, raising his dark-red eyebrows, and Senri exhaled slowly. 

Well, if nothing else, he could definitely understand the issues of overprotective brothers! Hell, if either Ares or Hades heard he'd been threatened... there would be literally hell to pay, not to mention they would fucking smother him in the process! 

"Think I get that," he said with a slow nod if keeping his expression carefully neutral. "If I feel pressed to mention that Alisaie likely had more than one motive on mind suggesting... me," he hedged, trying to read the redhead's face, but it appeared impossible when he tilted his head slightly, freeing one hand to motion for him to continue. "I'm not sure how you know each other... but you’re aware she's quite a stubborn matchmaker?" 

"Oh?" He frowned, perhaps in habit biting his lower lip... and suddenly the room grew even hotter, while Senri forced himself to keep his gaze on ruby eyes behind the glasses. 

"Listen...?"

"Raha," the man offered easily, smiling again if it looked a bit uncertain.

"Okay, listen, Raha..." he took a deep breath and straightened in his seat. His family taught him never to be ashamed of his sexuality, and with how obvious was this ploy on Alisaie's part...? Not to mention how fucking cute was this redhead? "...I'm gay, so I don’t know how comfortable you would feel with me..." he stopped, pointing at himself, then at him." ...playing your boyfriend."

Raha blinked again, and his whole expression seemed to close off completely. 

"What that has to do with anything?" He finally said calmly, almost infuriatingly so. 

Really, what does it...? Only, he was so freaking cute, and those lips... were downright fuckable!

Senri felt that if shoved into the role of this man's boyfriend, well... it might be hard to resist the idea of using it to turn that play into reality!

"I mean..." he started, then trailed off, feeling the way his face heated up. 

"I just need a proper company for one evening, Senri," that comforting smile again, and he found himself nodding, despite his whole body going hotter for no reason. "Marvelous. The gala is this weekend, Saturday evening. If you write here your address..." now he seemed like a flurry of movement, pushing a piece of paper and pen toward him. "...I'll have a car pick you up."

"Y-Yeah, sure..." he sighed, then leaned in and hastily scribbled down the address of his apartment. Normally he resented giving it to anyone, especially a stranger, after some issues with stalkers, but... fuck, he needed cash, and for just one evening of pretending this dude's boyfriend, the pay Alisaie promised was beyond nice. He could stay being picky about his next job for quite a bit longer, if nothing else... "That’s all?"

"Yes, of course," the redhead announced with a smile, taking the paper back from him but holding his gaze still with that unreadable look in his unique eyes. "If you leave your measurements with my assistant, I'll have a tuxedo delivered a day before, then after that party, you can keep it alongside the agreed upon payment. Is that alright?" 

He didn’t really need a tux... but hell... Senri nodded, standing up when the redhead did and accepted a handshake above the papers spread over the table... trying to ignore the jolt it sent up his arm. He pulled his hand back quickly, nodded again, then turned and headed toward the door. 

"Nice meeting you, Raha..." he tossed a tad awkwardly over his shoulder, then, without waiting for an answer, left the office, heading toward the desk of the blonde assistant. 

Well, he might not strangle Alisaie after all... maybe. 

*_*_*

When the door closed, Raha exhaled loudly and fell back in his seat, then pressed his hand over his insanely pounding heart.

"Idiot," he hissed at himself under his breath, praying to any gods who would listen that Senri didn’t notice any of his usual awkwardness. 

He thought himself well prepared for it. He rehearsed every word so many times it should have been easy... but they all seemingly fled his head the moment the love of his life set foot inside the room! 

Alisaie trained him well, and he thought that he managed not to show any hint of his attraction toward the impossibly beautiful male. She warned that her best friend reacted badly to that, and considering he scarcely managed to convince her to help him in the first place...? 

They were friends mostly due to their parents being one, and since he was little, they met constantly at various gatherings. Alisaie liked him well enough, he supposed, but she loved Senri like a brother and was fiercely protective of him. He knew because it took him literally months of whining before she caved, agreeing to play her part. 

Mostly after he admitted that he's been in love with him for-fucking-ever, but was too chicken shit to do anything about it other than watch him from afar. He wasn’t at all surprised that Senri didn't remember him at all, as the last time they met face to face, they were barely kids. 

...when Senri saved him, and he fell madly in love with his adorable grin. With his kindness and the way, the other boy dried his tears without a hint of judgment. Stayed and played with him despite the other kids laughing at his freaky eyes. 

Then, the next day he was gone, and it took years before he found him again. By accident, no less. 

Or, perhaps... fate. 

He didn’t mind one way or another but simply wanted one chance... to see if it could work. One evening to convince Senri that he could be everything he wanted, as he was everything Raha wanted. 

He sighed, then ran his fingers through his hair, still watching the closed door. He had four days to prepare to - somehow - sweep him off his feet. 

...if you dream, dream big, right?

[Continues in the next one o.~]

[writermuses]

Open: Anyone, F if romantic (Mun/Muse/FC must be 21+) Plot: Your muse has a friend/family member that helped them get out of a bad situation by moving them to a new town and setting up a job with a friend. It's time to meet the boss. Muse: Valerius "War" Warren, 33, Tattooist/Owner of kINK and money launderer for the Cross Syndicate

War didn't like owing people any favors, but when there were needed repairs in his apartment, he didn't have a choice but to rush home and ask someone else to lock up kINK and cancel his last two appointments. With a vacancy for an office manager, he was glad that the request for cashing in the favor was going to help him out rather than put him out. When he got off of his bike in the empty lot his hackles went up, watching a person stand up at the door to the tattoo parlor. "This ain't the kind of place you should be sitting in front of." His cool gaze running them over and sizing them up. "You lost or in some kind of trouble?"

[wormstacheangel]

Suptober Day 2: No Vacancy

wc: 1.1k tags: mutual pining, my beloved <3

It’s all the same thing. Motel after motel, they all said the same thing, no vacancy. Over and over, they mocked the too-tired hunters who just wanted a bed, any bed at the moment. Then, finally, Dean didn’t care anymore. He just wanted somewhere to rest his head that wasn’t his overly cramped car.

“Dean, just pull into the hotel.” Sam pointed at the big building that stood lakeside with a beautiful mountain view.

“Dude, even with Charlie’s magical card, I know it’s gonna be too much.” Dean talked while pulling into the hotel parking lot. Dean stopped out front and gave his wallet to Sam, “Just get whatever they have available. The kid’s neck is gonna hurt if he keeps sleeping like that.”

Dean motions to the back seat, where Jack sleeps on Cas’s shoulder.

“Got it.” Sam carefully closed the door behind him to make sure not to wake him before he headed inside.

The car was silent for a moment before Cas asked, “The lake looks beautiful. Maybe I’ll take a walk while you all rest.”

“Just don’t go exploding in it.” Dean tried to joke, but it came out too bitter, and he winced away from Cas’s gaze in the rearview mirror.

“I was just thinking of a nice stroll, actually. Maybe skip some stones if I get really bored waiting for you to wake up.” Cas kept his voice even, casual, and Dean was thankful. “But I’ll happily wait. For you.”

Dean looked back at the mirror, only for Cas to look away suddenly.

Cas cleared his throat, his head turning to hide his face into Jack’s sweat-covered hair. “To wake up. I’ll wait for you to wake up.”

Dean felt the warmth grow in his chest as the hope crumbled again. “Yeah. Yeah, course.”

Silence filled the cabin. The only noise was Dean’s constant finger drumming and muffled noise around them. So when Dean saw Sam walk back, giving them a thumbs-up, he felt relief—watching his brother get back in the car and point at where they should park.

“They only gave us one room, but it has two queens and a pullout couch.” They walked back to the hotel, duffle bags swung over their shoulders, while Sam explained the gist. “Figured we give one bed to Jack, and we can play for the other.”

“I can take the couch.” Jack insisted, but Dean waved his words away.

“No way. You used way too much mojo last hunt. You need the rest.” So they all cramped up the elevator and headed to the fifth floor. Sam apparently got them a nice view. It was the only room available apparently, coincidentally it was also really expensive. “I’ll take the couch.”

“No arguments here.” Sam was the first one out of the elevator, and they all followed him until they got to their room. “Wow.”

Dean whistled. “Shit. We should do hotels more often.”

“It actually smells clean,” Cas commented in disbelief--the brothers both took a deep inhale and gave each other an approving glace--while Jack pushed ahead to fall into one of the beds.

“Dude, it has a small kitchen.” Sam dropped his stuff on the other bed next to Jack before gently patting Jack’s leg. “Take a shower first. You’ll feel better.”

Dean walked over to the couch and quickly took out to the bed as Cas and Sam tried to convince Jack to shower. Dean didn’t look up as he took out his pajamas. He simply cleared his throat to get the kid’s attention before saying, “Jack. Shower. Go.”

Jack groaned, kicking his legs off the bed, and headed to the bathroom. Dean gave his brother and Cas a smug look while they rolled their eyes back at him.

They were all soon clean and tucked into bed. Even the damn couch mattress was better than any motel. And yet, Dean didn’t sleep.

He thought he was going to pass out as soon as his head hit the pillow but instead, Instead, he felt like he finally got the energy to drive them the rest of the night home. There was no noise to keeping him awake or an annoying, blinking light in his eyes. Nope. This is the most comfortable he has been in days, yet all he can think about is Cas sitting on the balcony, reading a book under the moonlight.

Dean could see the angel from where he lay in bed and didn’t want to miss the exciting moment when Cas licked his finger to turn a page. A habit he picked up from God knows where and while Dean would have found it disgusting if anyone else had done that, he was mesmerized by the way Cas’s tongue poked out to wet his finger.

In the glowing moonlight, Dean thought he could find the courage to say something. Anything.

“Staring is rude.” Cas’s voice is low, and yet it still made Dean jump out of his skin. “Or so I have been told.”

He didn’t look up from his book, and yet Dean could hear the amusement in his voice. Cas was teasing him.

Dean got up from his cocoon of blankets-- course, they got extras-- and headed outside to join the wide awake angel.

“Thought you were gonna take a walk.” Dean leaned against the door frame with his hands shoved into his sweatpants pockets. Watching as Cas looked up from his book with a small smile.

“I may still do that. But I also wanted to enjoy the view.” Cas motioned towards the mountains and the lake that shinned with the moon’s glow. He shut his book, watching Dean as he moved closer to the balcony but didn’t dare go to the edge. It was quiet again, but this time it was comfortable.

“I also figured,” Cas got up from his seat to join Dean. He was copying his stance while brushing their arms together. “That maybe you would be a little worried if I left. But I could be wrong.”

Dean could feel the warmth run up his face because he wasn’t wrong, Cas and lakes were never a good combination. But, instead of answering, Dean gently nudged Cas with his elbow. Not looking at him while stepping a little closer. It was cold out there; it made sense to huddle up.

They stood looking at the view for a while until Cas wrapped his coat around Dean’s shoulders. Until Dean felt his friend supported his whole body weight. Until Dean felt arms practically carry him inside, holding him until morning came. Hearing whispers as fingers gently touch his skin. So carefully like he does when he flips a page of his favorite book.

“You’re worth waiting for.” Dean wasn’t sure if he felt lips on his head, but he tugged the blanket of warmth closer. “Go to sleep, Dean. I’ll be here when you wake.”

His hands didn’t loosen their grip. Knowing damn well, this hotel was worth every penny if he finally got to sleep like this.

[fortuositywritings]

I Said No (Wanda x R): Pt 6

Summary: You kissed Wanda. Where do you go from here? Camping. You go camping is where.

Challenge: Take a shot of preferred drink (water for you youngsters, stay hydrated) every time you read "s'mores".

Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 3, Pt. 4, Pt. 5

Wanda is beyond frustrated. It has been eight hours since you kissed her on the ferris wheel. Eight painful hours of rewinding the moment in her mind over and over again, wondering what it means because you haven’t said anything about it. You acted no different when you met back with everyone else. No different when Laura asked with a knowing smile how the view was from the top. No different on the car ride home nor when you said goodnight to her like you did to everyone else even if she had lingered behind a little longer in case you maybe wanted to say something while no one else was near.

It’s like it never even happened and now she’s wondering if she’s somehow messing with her own mind. 

No, it definitely happened. Maybe there’s a reason. Maybe you’ll explain. Maybe she needs to sleep. 

She can feel Nat stirring beside her, signaling her to close her eyes and feign sleep.

“I know you’re awake, Wanda. You’re going to have to do better than that,” Nat says. Wanda huffs. She should know better than try to pretend in front of the spy. “What’s wrong? You’ve been tossing and turning all night.”

Wanda doesn’t think Nat would like to hear the reason for her restlessness, but she also knows she can’t get away with lying, so she chooses to say, “I don’t think you would want to know.”

“Wanda,” Nat sighs, almost defeatedly, “I know I have my reservations about you and Y/N but I meant what I said. You are both adults who can make your own choices and if this is really something you both want then I’ll be here for you and her both. I know you might not believe this, but I’d much rather be here to help you prove me wrong than you two go and prove me right.”

Nat is lying on her back now staring at the ceiling waiting patiently for Wanda to say something. Wanda follows Nat’s lead and stares at the blank ceiling trying to get her thoughts in order. Wanda doesn’t like talking about her feelings. She’s one to figure things out on her own but if she doesn’t get answers soon, she is going to go insane. Nat knows Y/N well enough. Maybe she knows why Y/N acted so indifferent. So Wanda decides to trust Nat. “She kissed me.”

Wanda turns her head to see Nat’s expression. Nat’s face remains stoic. “Are you mad?” Wanda asks warily.

“No, but I am surprised,” Nat says with what Wanda could swear is amusement. “I didn’t think she had it in her to go against anything Clint or I say.”

Wanda smiles, “You don’t give her enough credit.”

“Maybe. I think I also give you too much credit. I thought it would be you to do it. You Maximoffs tend to be relentless until you get what you want.” Wanda chuckles acknowledging that sometimes she and her brother annoy the rest of the team until things go their way. “So she kissed you. What’s the problem?”

Wanda’s good mood comes back down as she falls back to reality. “I don’t know if there is a problem is the problem,” Wanda groans in frustration.

“You’ve lost me.”

Wanda can’t have this conversation lying down so she sits up. Nat does the same, giving Wanda her full attention. “It’s just, it’s so push and pull with her. She flirts and I flirt back. Then she says she can’t so I let it go, but later she pulls me in again but then reminds me we can only be friends only to kiss me at the fair. And now she’s acting like it didn’t even happen and it’s all so frustrating,” Wanda vents.

Nat takes a moment to process everything. “You have to keep in mind that Y/N doesn’t do the whole relationship thing. She tried it once and well it didn’t work out. Now when things get serious, she likes to ignore them or as I’m sure you’ve noticed she likes to joke her way out. So if you want to work this out, you’ll have to find a way to talk to her without her freaking out,” Nat advises. 

The mention of a past relationship piques Wanda’s interest. “Y/N’s been in a relationship before? She’s never mentioned it.”

Nat smirks shaking her head, “Of course out of everything I said, that’s what you got. Tell me, have you told her about the robot boyfriend you had not too long ago?” Wanda looks down at the bedsheets in embarrassment. Nat wants to laugh but decides to give Wanda a break. “Look, if you really want to know you can ask Y/N later, okay? Now get some rest. You shouldn’t let guy, girl, or robot problems keep you from sleeping,” she finishes chuckling and gets up from the bed. 

“Where are you off to?” Wanda still goes to lie down but looks up at Nat with tired eyes.

“Going to go for a hike with your girl,” Nat teases as she grabs her clothes and clothes for you.

“She’s not my girl,” Wanda says, tucking her head into her pillow to hide her blush but Nat still caught it. She also catches when Wanda mumbles, “yet.”

“And there’s that bratty Maximoff attitude. I see you’re feeling better now,” Nat laughs and leaves the room without giving Wanda the time to respond, not that Wanda was planning to because Nat was right. Wanda was feeling better now having talked it out with someone. She’ll do as Natasha said and ask you later. With that she closes her eyes and tries to get some sleep.

You didn’t fare too well last either, much like Wanda. You were trying so hard not to think about your kiss with Wanda, but it’s all you could think about. You don’t know what possessed you to do it, but you know you should not have done it. You should not have done it because now all you can think about is doing it again, about doing it again and letting her kiss you back. You shouldn’t have kissed her because you don’t want to get anyone’s hopes up, including yourself. It’s happened to you once before and you’re scared because it is happening to you again. 

So, you tried to play it cool. If you act like it was a friendly kiss that didn’t really mean anything, then Wanda will take the hint and when she inevitably goes, so will your feelings. No harm done. Friends kiss sometimes, right? At least that’s what you’ve been trying to convince yourself all night until you fell asleep.

You awaken from your two hours of Wanda-filled dreams by gym clothes smacking your face. You groan, “No, please. Not today, Nat. I barely got any sleep last night.”

“Oh, not you too,” she comments, rolling her eyes at you. You lift your head at that to look at her confused by what she meant. “Come on, some exercise will take your mind off whatever kept you up,” she continues with a knowing smile as she takes a sip of her coffee.  You narrow your eyes at her but eventually give in. Maybe she’s right and it will help you take your mind off of Wanda for even a moment. 

You still need the energy though, so you steal her coffee as you pass by her with your clothes in hand.

The one time you actually hoped Nat would be right, she wasn’t. You’re an hour into your hike and your brain has no vacancy for anything other than Wanda. You want to scream. Instead you push yourself harder. Another hour goes by and your head is still spinning, except this time it might also be because of the lack of oxygen reaching your brain. You go to lay on the dirty ground and attempt to catch your breath. Nat stops, not hearing your footsteps behind her. 

She looks at you a little worried. You are heaving and you are sweaty and you are frustrated and it’s official; a pretty girl named Wanda Maximoff broke you. You start chuckling and soon a full resounding laugh comes out of you like you heard the funniest joke. Nat goes to sit by you warily but doesn’t say anything.

Your laughter dies, replaced by a solemn attitude. You sit up, your shoulder touching Nat’s. She still doesn’t say anything and you’re thankful for that. Without looking at her, you tell her earnestly, “I really like her.”

“Yeah, I know,” she sighs.

“She told you,” you say, no surprise in your voice. You were clued in this morning with Nat’s knowing smile. Nat hums in confirmation. “I know you and Clint warned me, but-”

“But we were wrong,” Nat cuts you off. That has you looking at her, your eyebrows raised in shock. You never thought you’d hear her admit being wrong so blatantly. She laughs, “Don’t get used to hearing that. Seriously though, you don’t need someone telling you what you can or cannot do. It wasn’t right for us to try. So, I’ll tell you what I told Wanda, whatever happens, I’ll be here if you need me.”

“Aww, look who’s taking accountability. Little Romanov is all grown up!” you joke. She rolls her eyes and nudges you saying, “I guess serious talk is over.”

She knows you too well. You smile anyway in appreciation. You both get up and start making your way back to the car. You feel lighter after that conversation. On your walk back, you begin to think, maybe you can give it a shot with Wanda now that it seems Nat and Clint are giving into the idea of you two together. You smile at the thought of you and Wanda together. You can make it work, you think. That is if you can allow trust in yourself to not hurt her and trust her not to do the same. But you have time to work on that. 

When you reach the car, a daunting thought stops you. You don’t have time. “She’s leaving soon.”

Nat opening the car door simply says, “Yeah, guess you have to decide what you want to do quickly.” 

“I’ve decided,” Clint says to everyone at breakfast. When you and Nat had gotten to the house, almost everyone was still asleep. You and Nat only saw Sam and Laura up in the kitchen. You’d guessed the fair wore everyone out yesterday. You and Nat helped Sam and Laura make breakfast. Well, Nat helped. You had been told to sit at the table and let the adults do the cooking. How were you meant to learn if they didn’t let you? At least Wanda had let you help.

Wanda, as if summoned by your thoughts, had appeared then. You saw her hesitate walking into the kitchen. You knew you messed up by ignoring what happened between the two of you. You gave her a smile and patted the seat next to you hoping to alleviate the tension. Luckily for you it seemed to do the trick. You two were back to your usual selves though you both knew you would have to talk about what happened at some point.

Everyone came downstairs one by one and when breakfast was ready, you all headed into the dining room to eat together. Everyone was having their own side conversations but they all hushed down when Clint spoke up saying he decided something.

“And what did you decide?” Laura asks him. You try hard not to laugh, recognizing the same tone she gave you two days ago when you told everyone you were going to the fair. Wanda sees you try to hide your amusement and pinches your side to get you to stop. Being ticklish, you nearly squeal but hold it in. By the way Wanda’s eyes spark up, you know she noticed. You give her a warning stare and mouth “no”.

“My sweet, beautiful wife,” Clint begins sweet talking your cousin, but you’re not paying too much attention as Wanda is trying to tickle your side discreetly with one hand and you are trying hard to keep it away. Across the table, Pietro is not paying attention to Clint either, instead watching you and Wanda interact. He feels so dumb for not noticing it before, but seeing you bring out the playfulness in Wanda, which he hadn’t seen in the longest time, you could make him feel like the dullest bulb in the box and he wouldn’t complain. All three of your attention is brought back to the subject at hand when Clint says, “I’ve decided we’re going camping today!”

The kids, Peter, Sam, and you let out a cheer. You squeeze Wanda’s hand that you managed to catch in yours. You don’t feel any excitement coming from her so you turn to her. She looks discontent at the thought of camping. “Oh, come on. Don’t say you don’t like camping.”

“Pietro and I have not gone camping but the thought of bugs and sleeping on the ground does not sound appealing,” she says tentatively.

“Thank you. She gets it,” your cousin says and Nat nods her head in agreement.

“Don’t listen to the two buzzkills. They never want to do anything.” You ignore the scoff and “excuse me” they give you to instead try to convince Wanda. “I promise it’s going to be fun,” you look into her eyes, practically pleading with her. She huffs, closes her eyes, and says, “Fine.”

“Yes! What about you Pietro?” you ask her brother though you already know where one twin goes the other follows. “Yeah, let’s see what camping is about. Maybe we can share a tent,” Pietro flirts throwing a wink your way, mostly teasing to see his sister’s reaction. You ignore his last comment and start chanting “Camping! Camping!” until Peter, Cooper, and Lila chant along. You don’t notice the glare Wanda throws her brother or said brother trying to hide his smirk.

You take two cars like you had yesterday. This time you ride with Nat, Sam, Wanda, and Peter. Cooper and Lila refused to let Pietro ride in Nat’s car, wanting him to ride with them. Nat is driving with Sam sitting in the passenger seat after having called shotgun. You sat in the middle between Peter and Wanda, having offered her the window seat. The ride to the lake where you usually went camping isn’t long, only about an hour and a half away, but you find yourself falling asleep twenty minutes in when Wanda rests her head on your shoulder to take a nap. 

You and Wanda wake to the car door slamming shut. You both look out the window and see you’ve arrived and it had been Nat who stepped out of the car. From the car, you can see her stretch and take in the view with a disgruntled face. 

“Well someone’s excited,” Sam said sarcastically, having noticed Nat’s attitude toward this trip also. All of you in the car watch her as she sprays a ton of bug repellant on herself while grumbling, “Stupid Clint. I should be relaxing somewhere with AC. But nooo, Mr. ‘I’ve decided we’re going camping’ and Ms. ‘I promise it’s gonna be fun’ want to go camping. Fun my ass.”

You can’t help but laugh when she mocks you and Clint, and everyone in the car joins in. Nat turns to glare at all of you through the windows. “Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up. Just don’t come crying to me when you can’t stop scratching your legs tomorrow. Now chop chop. We’ve got things to bring out.” 

She leaves to help Laura out of the family car that just pulled up beside Nat’s own. She’s always so grumpy when you go camping. At the thought, a joke pops in your head that you can’t help but repeat out loud, “Yeah, she’s never really been a happy camper.”

“Did you just? Nice one!” Peter gives you a high five. Wanda and Sam shake their heads at you but you can see Wanda trying not to smile. Sam catches it and throws his head back groaning, “Bad puns? Really? I gotta start writing things down.” He pulls out his phone and goes to his notes to start a list. “Okay, confident but geeky, talk about Star Wars, bad jokes. Am I missing anything, Wanda?”

You and Peter look at her confused. You are especially intrigued to know what Wanda has to do with whatever the hell Sam is talking about when she flushes and kicks his seat. “We should go help now,” she says, opening the door and hurrying out. You follow behind asking, “What’s he talking about, Wanda?” 

She ignores you. Peter reaches you and says, “I thought it was a good joke.”

Everyone helps out setting the tents, Clint wanting to get that out of the way first. No matter how much of a downer Nat can be on camping trips, you’re always glad she’s there or no tent would stand a chance holding upright. There are three sturdy tents set up a little ways away from the dock by the time you finish. Peter, the kids, the twins, and you run over to the dock in excitement, you pulling Wanda along with you. None of you are in the proper attire to jump in as Laura points out. “Hey, go put on your swim suits if you want to get in!” she shouts from where the rest are setting up everything for grilling.

You all turn back around to put on your swimwear. Best not to anger the pregnant lady. Before you can take a step forward, you feel like someone sweeps you up in their arms but it happens too fast to be sure and suddenly you are falling into the water. Everyone turns back around at the sound of you hitting the water. When your head springs from the water, you look for the culprit and see him smiling at you next to Sam. You do the only thing you can think of as revenge. You pretend to drown. “Help! I can’t-” you spit water everywhere waving your arms hysterically. You can hear footsteps running on the dock but ignore them to see Pietro’s reaction. His eyes widen and in a blink he is gone. 

You hear a splash. Correction, you hear three different splashes. You knew one had to be Pietro and you’re right. He pulls you into him with one arm, saying, “I got you. I got you.” 

You turn in his arm and say, “No, I got you.” He looks confused and you take the opportunity to wriggle loose and dunk his head in the water. The second and third splashes had come from Peter and Wanda, you note, when you hear them behind you say, “Y/N!” and “Are you okay?” You can’t answer because the sight of Pietro coming back up spluttering has you cracking up. 

“I thought you couldn’t swim,” Peter says. This time you do answer, “I told you guys, I was learning on the job.”

Peter starts laughing then, swimming towards Pietro, who took it easy laughing as well. “She got you so good. You should have seen your face,” Peter chuckles. You grin, but that smile falls when you look at Wanda and find her glaring at you.The joy on your face morphs into confusion. You ask, “What’s wrong?”

“That wasn’t funny, Y/N.” She leaves you there with your mouth agape and heads to the shore without another word, swimming past Peter and Pietro who are basically water fighting. You float there for a second wondering what just happened. You don’t know what to do but you think you have to fix it somehow. 

You swim after her. Pietro and Peter stop splashing water at each other, turning their bodies to look at you as you pass by them now able to touch the ground with your feet. Pietro teases, “Oooh, someone’s sleeping on the couch tonight.” 

You wanted to point out that you have been sleeping on the couch the whole week and that technically you’ll be sleeping in a tent tonight. Instead you splash some water at him behind you and try to walk faster against the water to catch Wanda. When you are close enough, you reach out and pull on her wrist to get her to stop walking. You walk around her to stand face to face. She pulls her arm free from your hold and crosses her arms in front of her body looking everywhere but at you. You see her clenching her jaw in irritation and if you’re honest with yourself, you find this angry Wanda pretty attractive, but you remember she’s mad at you and you focus on the matter at hand.

Unbeknownst to you both, everyone’s watching. “Oh, she’s mad mad. Let’s see Y/N try to joke her way out of this one,” Sam says chuckling. Clint and Nat turn to him, Nat smirking and Clint chuckling. Laura is preoccupied putting sunscreen on the kids to be aware of what is going on.

“Oh, come on. Sure, Y/N is smooth but I know Wanda, and that girl is stubborn as hell,” Sam says confidently, remembering the time Wanda had not spoken to her brother for three days because he went to a party with some of the guys forgetting he was supposed to go to the movies with her. 

“Want to bet?” Clint says. 

“20, easy.” Sam shakes Clint’s hand. Off in the water, Peter and Pietro are having a similar conversation. Peter asks if Wanda is actually mad. Peter doesn’t live on the compound and has not had much interaction with Wanda, so it makes sense to Pietro why he would ask. Pietro laughs, “Oh, yes. One time I forgot to go to the movies with her and she did not speak with me for days. She has the same face now.”

You don’t really have a plan here, so you start the way you always do, using humor. “Wanda, are you actually mad? Am I in hot … water?” you flick some water for effect. She doesn’t find it amusing. She scoffs at you, but at least she’s looking at you now. “The water’s cold and jokes won’t get you out of this one.”

“We’ll just have to sea about that,” you try again. You didn’t think she could look more peeved, but look at you making the impossible happen. She says, “It’s a lake,” unamused, and she moves to go around you. So humor is a no go in this situation.

“What did I tell you,” Sam boasts, seeing Wanda look more irritated. “Easiest 20 dollars, I made.”

“Just wait,” Clint says. Laura goes to sit beside him and asks, “What’s happening?”

“Wanda is mad at Y/N. Sam bet Clint 20 dollars that Wanda will stay mad at her,” Nat explains. Suddenly, Sam doesn’t feel so confident when Laura shakes her head at him like he just got played and says, “Oh, Sam.”

“Okay, wait, wait, wait.” You step to the side making sure Wanda doesn’t leave. “I’m sorry. It was just a dumb way to get back at Pietro. I didn’t mean to upset you or freak you out,” you say, pulling her arms apart from where they are still crossed. “The last thing I want to do is make you mad or sad or any of the -ad’s.” You see her tense shoulders loosen up so you add, “You already know how I feel about Brads.”

You know you made the right choice when you hear her giggle at your last comment. You smile and tug on her arm. “So are we good? Or do I have to pull out the famous puppy dog eyes?” you jest and she gives you a real laugh when you actually go for the puppy dog eyes along with a pout. She shoves you playfully and you nearly stumble backwards but you hold onto her arms and pull yourself forward. In consequence you end up closer to each other and Wanda takes the opportunity to pull you into a hug. 

“Just don’t do it again,” Wanda says. You wrap your arms around her waist, welcoming in her hug. “Wouldn’t dream of it. Now let’s go swimming,” you say quickly. She barely catches what you say before you pick her up and take off back in Peter and Pietro’s direction, Wanda laughing the whole way.

“What the hell was that?” Sam refuses to believe what he just saw. 

“Easiest 20 dollars I ever made,” Clint chuckles.

“No, see she’s gotta have some kind of persuasion powers or something. Why isn’t that girl on the team? We could just give her a microphone before we go fight and have her convince the bad dudes to turn themselves in,” Sam says as he reluctantly takes out a twenty dollar bill and gives it to Clint.

Pietro is very much on the same boat as Sam. He decides he needs to learn your secrets. Peter says, “Maybe the movie she wanted to watch was really good?”

You have your fun in the water, especially when the kids and Sam join you deciding they want to play chicken fight. Cooper goes against Lila and despite her being younger and smaller, she manages to push Cooper off Sam’s shoulder. Pietro holds Sam up as he goes against Peter. Sam cheers when Peter falls backwards into the water. Most would be surprised by the win but it was mostly your fault, not having a good stance when trying to hold Peter on your shoulders. 

You go to fight against Wanda next; she takes Sam’s place on Pietro’s shoulders and you sit on Sam’s shoulders. Cooper and Lila count down and when they yell go, you and Wanda are pushing each other’s shoulders. Wanda removes a hand from your shoulder and reaches for your stomach, but you catch her arm quickly. “Not today. You’re going down, Maximoff!”

“Yeah, we’ll see about that-” Wanda begins but doesn’t finish. You can feel her grip loosen on your shoulder when she gives you a look of befuddlement. “Actually, I don’t know your last name.” You smirk, taking this as your opportunity, and say, “Good. Now you can see how I felt.” Then you push her shoulder and she loses her balance. You can smell the victory, but the smell wafts away when you see what looks like a red mist coming from her and hurling towards you. You are practically flung from Sam’s shoulder into the water. 

You resurface, spluttering water. You look around for the person of interest and head towards her when she gets up beside Pietro. “You cheated!” you yell. You’re not actually mad but you are a sore loser. She sees you coming toward her and Wanda can’t help but laugh at how silly you look trying to stomp over to her intimidatingly when you are moving so slowly against the water. “I thought you and I had agreed on no powers.”

“No, you said no more mind reading,” she corrects you with a pleased smile on her face. 

“Well new rule, no powers in general and wipe that grin off your face, no one likes a smart-ass,” you huff. She replies whilst giving your cheek a poke, “Then wipe that pout off your face. No one likes a sore loser.” You shake your head to get her finger off your face, making her laugh again.

Pietro challenges Wanda next and before either of them have a chance to decide who will be carrying them, you dive under Wanda and between her legs, making her yelp in surprise as you lift her up on your shoulders. You hold on tight to her thighs and then reach for her arms to keep her steady. She giggles when she looks down not able to see you behind all the hair in your face. She helps you out and pulls your hair back out of your face. You look up at her, who keeps her hands on your head, and smile in thanks.

You look at Wanda’s opponent. Pietro, who is situated on Sam’s shoulders, is already looking at you like he’s thinking something over. Then he looks above you at Wanda and challenges, “If I win, you have to tell me what Y/N said to not make you angry anymore.”

Sam under him adds, “Yeah, I wanna know why I lost 20 dollars!” You give him a look of bewilderment. Wanda thinks it over and decides, “Okay, but if I win, Sam has to stop trying to be geeky like Y/N and Peter.” You pinch her thigh and Peter shouts “Hey!” at being called geeky. She ignores the two of you, continuing, “And you have to stop flirting with Y/N.”

“Why? Are you jealous, Wanda?” her brother baits her. Your ears perk up awaiting her response.

“No, you’re just annoying,” Wanda says trying to sound nonchalant, but Pietro knows her well. He continues badgering, “Well, what if Y/N likes it?” 

You decide to partake in his teasing her and add, “Yeah, Wanda. What if I like it?” You look up at her with a cheeky smile and find her already looking down at you with an eyebrow raised and her tongue poking at her cheek, a look you feel says “you don’t want to test me”. Gut feelings shouldn’t be ignored, you think, so you look back to Pietro, “Sorry, I guess I don’t like it.” You follow with a dramatic whisper, “Totally jealous.” She tugs your hair in retaliation for your comment.

“So, is it a deal or not, ‘cause my shoulders are starting to hurt,” Sam says. The twins agree and you are thankful Sam got the ball rolling because you didn’t know how much longer you could hold up Wanda. Peter counts down this time. It’s over in less than 3 seconds. It seems Wanda likes to cheat. Everyone sees the red mist fading after Pietro falls into the water. 

“That’s not fair. You used your powers. That’s cheating,” Pietro says when he comes back up and Sam nodding in agreement while Wanda defends herself saying they never said they couldn’t use powers. You tell Wanda to take a breath and close her nose and then fall backwards to get her off your shoulders. Another few minutes of swimming pass by before Clint yells for all of you to get out and go eat. You all head to the little cabin that has the restrooms and showers. Laura meets you there with towels. Those of you that jumped in the lake enter the showers with clothes and all to wash away the lake water and then head outside to rinse off. 

Clint watches you hand your towel to Wanda for her to dry off first. You say something that makes Wanda let out a resonant laugh and in turn makes you smile vibrantly. He’s only ever seen you look at someone like that once. He grimaces at how that turned out. And Wanda he’s actually never seen act like this, so jubilant and lively, playfully rolling her eyes and pushing you away after you make a stupid joke. It brings a smile to his face despite the voice in the back of his head saying this can’t end well.

As everyone eats, they unintentionally group off to have different conversations. Clint, Sam, and Peter stand by the mini grill, Laura and Nat sit in some camping chairs complaining about the bugs, the kids are drawing things on the ground with a stick they found, and you, Wanda, and Pietro are sitting on other camping chairs.

Pietro and Wanda tell you stories of when they were children, both their eyes seem to almost glaze over as they reminisce on fond memories. Though their storytelling styles differ, Pietro with his animated gestures and Wanda with her attention for detail, they both have you captivated. You offer them a few stories of your own childhood, including the ones you found embarrassing like the three different times you called one teacher “mom” and the time you walked straight into a pole talking to your crush in middle school.

“So you weren’t always so smooth as I hear you are,” Wanda comments through her laughter.

“Nope, this awesome personality took years in the making,” you joke, making Wanda shake her head at you. Pietro comments, “Yeah, not everyone can be born with it like I was.”

Wanda laughs at this, which offends Pietro and soon the twins are bickering much to your amusement. Wanda recounts times Pietro was very much not so smooth with the ladies including things he’s done that caused certain girlfriends to leave him, Pietro obviously having excuses as to why something happened. He fires his shot at her when he tells her she can’t begin to talk about relationships when she’s only had one and it was 3D printed. 

You tune them out after this due to shock and confusion. You’re shocked that Wanda’s only ever dated one person. You never really thought to ask about her exes because you thought it might bring up some bad memories knowing she had just gone through a breakup not so long ago. So you also find it shocking that she was so brazenly forward about wanting to try something with you if she doesn’t date like her brother does-like you do which you don’t even consider dating. You kind of want to smile thinking about it. You just know that she has people left and right who would kill for a chance to be with her, but she likes you. You are trying hard not to let it go to your head but can already feel your ego growing in size. The confusion comes from the 3D printed comment. You’ll have to ask about that later.

“-ask Y/N.” You bring your attention back to the conversation when hearing your name.

“She doesn’t do relationships. She’s too busy playing the game and winning,” Sam chuckles standing between the twins’ chairs. You hadn’t even noticed when he joined you three. You don’t know where they were in the conversation and don’t want to explain what you were thinking about if you ask them to repeat the question because you were distracted, so you decide to go along with Sam. You fake a laugh and say, “Yeah, tried it once and it wasn’t for me.”

“You? In a relationship?” You nod at both of Pietro’s questions. “With who?”

“Her name’s Skye and no, she doesn’t live here so don’t try going around town asking about her. I may not have known you for long, but I can just tell you’re both nosy.” You point at Pietro and Sam.

“Then don’t leave us wondering. What happened?” Sam asks. From the look in his eye, you know he won’t let it go. You don’t feel like recounting the details of how you were falling for someone who left you saying they couldn’t do relationships because they were distracting her from trying to do something important. It was a blow to the gut then; you’re sure your face would show it. You don’t want to be a drag. 

“Nothing exciting. She told me relationships weren’t for her at the time,” you say nonchalantly,  shrugging your shoulders like it doesn’t still hurt to think about.

“So you decided relationships weren’t for you,” Wanda speaks up, her stare hard on your profile like she’s trying to figure you out. You think she reads you too well already, there can’t be anything you hide that she won’t find.

“If you can’t beat them, join them,” you say, trying to look unfazed by it all. It seems to work because the guys move on, Sam joking saying that was the reason you partnered with Wanda after you lost the chicken fight. Wanda, however, is still staring at you, trying to decipher your words. You try not to focus on that. The guys laugh when you say that technically you won because Wanda cheated using her powers.

“So it is cheating! If you say you won, that means Sam and I won, so Sam can try to be geeky and I can flirt with you and you have to tell us how Wanda’s mood changed so fast,” Pietro says matter-of-factly. Now this gets Wanda to quit staring at you. Instead she turns her head to Pietro to give him a glare when he mentions flirting with you. You don’t know too much about Wanda’s powers but you would not be surprised if one was killing someone with a look; Pietro would be pulverized from being on the receiving end of her glare and you from how attractive you found it. 

But now is not the time. As much as it hurts your ego that has now flown through the roof, you reach your foot over to loop your ankle around Wanda and say to Pietro, “Okay, then I didn’t win. It was a draw.” Wanda turns her attention back over to you when she feels your ankle against hers.

“Oh, come on! Just tell us how you did it,” Sam says. 

“Guess she just likes me more than you two,” you offer with a cheeky smile. You miss Wanda blushing when Sam says, “That’s for sure.” You didn’t even catch that because the smell of marshmallows roasting called you. You look over Sam’s shoulder and see Clint helping Cooper and Lila make a s’more. You notice Peter talking to Nat and Laura sitting around a small makeshift fire pit starting to poke marshmallows on the ends of some steel sticks Clint must have bought. “Um, what the hell, guys? Was no one going to call us for s’mores?” you yell more so towards your cousin. 

Everyone turns to look at you but your group who look over to see the reason you were yelling. Your cousin gives you a well-job-done look when Lila says, “Ooo, Y/N said a bad word.” As your group heads over to the rest, you give your cousin your don’t-worry-I’ll-fix-it look you’ve given her countless times and tell Lila, “Yes, I did but you can’t. Not until you’re ten.”

“Y/N!” Both Clint and Laura yell while Nat actually tries to fix it and says, “Y/N was just being funny. Don’t listen to her.”

“But you say Y/N is never funny,” Cooper chimes in. Everyone stifles a laugh when you scoff. “That’s because your Aunt Nat wouldn’t know a joke if it bit her in the ass,” you say the last part directly looking at her. You hear Clint say something like “not this again” while most are saying “oooh” including the kids but they say it to point out you said another bad word.

“I don’t know about that one. Why don’t you bite mine and I’ll tell you?” Nat comes back at you and so do the oohs from everyone and a bonus “burn” from Sam. You reply, “No, thank you. Wouldn’t want to accidentally bite into the stick stuck up there.”

“DAMN!” Sam says and before Nat could respond from what you’re sure would be what ends you tonight, your cousin cuts in. “Enough! I thought I would be raising 3 children. I didn’t sign up for 5. Lila, don’t listen to Y/N about the bad words and if she and Aunt Nat keep arguing,” your cousin threatens, “neither will be having s’mores.”

Both your and Nat’s eyes go wide at that. One thing you and she will never argue about is how s’mores are one of the greatest contributions the US has given the world in terms of culinary delicacies. 

“That got them quiet very fast. How good can s’mores be?” Pietro asks. You and Nat gasp so dramatically one would think Pietro insulted your mothers. “You’ve never had a s’more?” you ask both him and Wanda who shake their heads.

“Why was I never made aware of this?” Nat reprimands them as if it’s the twins’ fault they’ve never had s’mores. “Someone get these two a stick and some marshmallows ASAP,” Nat snaps, and you fetch four sticks and the bag of marshmallows, handing Nat, Pietro, and Wanda a stick each. 

“Prepare to have your mind blown,” you say dramatically. Wanda finds your passion for s’mores adorable. She gives you a smile in thanks when you stick two marshmallows at the end of her stick. Pietro is excited to try s’mores after you and Nat having raved about them; he can’t help but wiggle the stick back and forth while you are trying to put some marshmallows on it. You and Nat are helping the twins make their first s’mores when Wanda asks, “Why don’t Lila and Cooper call you Aunt Y/N?” 

“Because children recognize children,” Nat jests, but your cousin says her name as a warning anyway in case you two started up again. You call over Lila and Cooper for them to answer the question for you. Together they recite verbatim what you had told them to say when someone asked. “Aunt is for when you are old, boring, or married and Y/N is young, cool, and single.” You mouth along and give them a proud smile after.

“Exactly! Thank you, critters.” You give each a high five and they run back to their dad. Wanda looks impressed as do the rest. Nat, on the other hand, looks ready to argue again. “Excuse me, so which of the three am I, huh?”

“Well, you’re not married yet, so you take your pick between the other two choices.” Your eyes shimmer in merriment when she says nothing, opting to glare at you. Sam laughs and asks, “How long did it take them to remember that?”

“A whole summer two years ago. I told them I’d buy 4 pints of ice cream to whoever memorizes it first,” you explain. Everyone enjoys their s’mores, Pietro eating too many for his own good, as the sun disappears below the horizon. It’s not too long before Nat starts complaining about the bugs again. She’s cut off by her phone ringing. She stands off to the side to take the call. You joke around with Wanda saying it’s Bruce calling and you play out the conversation you think they’re having. Wanda laughs at your terrible attempt to mimic Nat and Bruce’s voices.

Nat comes back with news. “So, Rodgers can’t pick us up this weekend. He was called on a mission and had to take the jet, but Tony arranged for two agents named Bobby and Daisy to pick us up in 5 days.”

“You’re staying longer?” Lila asks and when Nat nods, she runs to hug Pietro cheering. You and Wanda look at each other after the news, both trying to see the other’s reaction. You give each other a shy smile. Wanda is happy to have more time with you. She was not ready to leave so soon not knowing when she would be able to see you next. You didn’t really know how you felt. You’re suddenly aware of your heart pounding aggressively against your chest. You were dreading your time with Wanda coming to a close but you were also somewhat prepared to hang on until the weekend without messing anything up. Hearing she’s staying for longer is a relief but you are not sure how long you can go without breaking and kissing her again, getting both your hopes up only for it to all come crashing down when she inevitably leaves. 

Nat interrupts your internal turmoil by ways of complaining again about the bugs. “Okay, this is not gonna happen. Clint, let me see your keys.” Clint tosses her his car keys. She pulls the house key from the key ring and tosses the car keys back to Clint. “Cool, see you all at the house tomorrow. Whoever wants to sleep on an actual bed and not in this AC-less mosquito infested site, you are welcome to tag along.”

Laura stands up way too quickly for someone who is pregnant and says she���s going with Nat. Lila tags along, apparently not wanting to sleep here without her mom. “What a baby,” you say shaking your head as you watch Nat’s car’s lights disappear. 

“Well at least now you’ll have more privacy in the tent,” Sam says, smirking at you and Wanda pointing out that you’ll be alone with Wanda in the tent, which you hadn’t put together until this moment. If your heart wasn’t beating like a drum before, it sure is trying to beat out of your chest now. You gulp at his insinuation. Maybe it isn’t too late to run after the car. 

“Ew, I don’t want to hear anything,” Pietro says, Sam and surprisingly Clint agreeing by nodding their heads. Wanda rolls her eyes at him and Peter on the hand is blushing, trying not to look at you or Wanda like he’s already seen something. You’re suddenly aware that all of them are heading to their tents. The fire had been put out and all the leftover food had been put away sometime while you were watching Nat’s group drive away. Pietro and Peter share one tent and Sam, Clint, and Cooper another. 

Wanda stands and looks down at you expectantly. You see she’s holding the lantern Lila always uses cause it’s in her favorite color of blue. “Do you plan to sleep outside?”

You roll your eyes and stand up to follow Wanda into your tent. There are three sleeping bags rolled out in front of you. “Guess we won’t be needing one of those,” Wanda comments behind you. The comment itself should make you nervous but what actually does it is the sound of her zipping the entrance closed. You gulp and can only let out a simple, “Mhm.”

If that alone had you acting this way, you didn’t want to find out what actually looking her way would do to you, so you quickly move, back hunching, to the back pack you brought. You kneel to comfortably search it. You gave her a better answer, clearing your throat. “Actually, Nat was right about the hard ground. You could use it as a double layer.”

“Or we could share it?” Wanda suggests. You stop digging in the bag as your breath catches. You reply, your voice an octave higher, “No, that-that’s okay.” You clear your throat when you notice your pitch and hope Wanda hadn’t. “I’m used to it, but I wouldn’t want to give you a bad impression of camping.” Wanda had. You are back to searching your bag for the sweats you had brought to sleep in.

Wanda notices you seem a little tense, having dug around that bag for awhile. She walks up to you and places a hand on your shoulder. Your body stiffens like a board under her hand. She has to ask, “Are you nervous?”

“Nervous? Pft, why would I be nervous?” You finally find your damn sweats. “I’ve done this a million times.” You are quick to change the subject when the only clothes apart from Nat’s you find beside your sweats are some pyjama shorts and a tank top. “Is this all you brought to sleep in?”

“I didn’t think we were going to be camping when I packed,” Wanda replies to your inquiry but she still has questions of her own she’d like answered. For example, why are you so nervous and what did the kiss yesterday mean for you two. “Y/N, we need to talk.”

“Luckily, Nat left her stuff so you can wear her clothes. Here.” You hand Wanda Nat’s sleepwear. She can obviously tell you were avoiding the conversation. “You can change. I’ll face the other way.” You turn around and change into your sweats. You would have to leave your top on not having planned for it to have gotten wet. You try not to let the sound of Wanda’s quick intake of breath make you blush knowing you didn’t give her any warning. You try really hard not to guess what Wanda is doing based on the sounds you’re hearing when you think she begins changing but your mind tends to wander especially when it comes to the girl behind you. 

“I don’t see why you have to turn around. I’m sure you’ve seen plenty of women undress.” The sound of clothes falling to the ground makes you gulp. You are never so nervous and it’s killing you. You try your hardest to find something funny to say but come up empty. Wanda is still waiting on a response, so you say facing a tent wall, “None of those women are you.”

Your words spark something in each of your heads- a decision. You decide to take a chance with Wanda because you do believe it in your heart. Wanda is not like any of the other women including Skye. Even though she has to leave in five days, you can make it work. Wanda, however, is reminded of how she isn’t like other women. She is reminded of what Nat had said before. She decides maybe Vision was right.

As much as you wish you could avoid a serious talk, you know you owe it to her. They do say the secret to a good relationship is open communication. The term relationship usually makes you want to run for the hills but when you think of it tied to Wanda, a flutter tickles your stomach. It’s a feeling you never thought you would welcome again and you have to suppress a smile.

“Okay, you can turn around now,” Wanda says. She notices you hiding a smile and she’s wondering what brought it on. Wanda watches you move Nat’s sleeping bag under the one meant for her and then settle into your own. Your kind consideration makes her smile weakly, thinking of all the things she’ll miss such as you opening doors for her or letting her have your blanket and remain sitting still for the sake of her comfort. You stare up at Wanda who you see is lost in thought but staring in your direction and finally manage to act like yourself. “I’m sure the view is nice from there, but I can assure you I look good from all angles,” you joke and pat her sleeping bag beside you. 

The sound of your hand patting her sleeping bag brings her out of her head and when she processes what you said, she rolls her eyes at you. She grabs the lantern, setting it a little aways from both of you once she gets into her sleeping bag. Both of you turn onto your sides placing your hands under your heads to face one another. You stare at each other for a while before a question pops up in your head. You ask, “What did Pietro mean by 3D printed?”

“Sorry?” Wanda looks confused so you clarify. “When you and your brother were arguing, he said your last relationship was 3D printed.” A light bulb goes off in her head, now knowing you were referring to Vision. “That was just Pietro being a jerk,” Wanda says and then she goes on to explain her relationship with this synthetic being to you. You try really hard not to let the fact that this ex-boyfriend of hers quite literally has a connection to her because how were you supposed to compare to that. 

You shake that off and scrape every corner of your mind for any trace of confidence and gather that to work up the nerve to say, “Off topic, or maybe on topic, but I feel like we need to talk about yesterday on the ferris wheel.”

Wanda sees you struggle trying to start a serious conversation. Trying not to have you freak out, as Natasha had implied would practically be impossible, Wanda meets you in the middle. She tries a bit of humor, something you are more comfortable with. “You mean our friendly date?” She adds in a chuckle so you would know she is kidding with you.

You smile, appreciating her trying to make it easier on you to talk to her. If she’s trying for you, you can try for her, you think. You sober up and a more serious expression falls upon your face. You want Wanda to know you mean everything you are about to say next. Wanda, however, misreads the intent behind your expression. What she sees is you finding the words to let her down slowly again. You had said relationships weren’t for you and talk of past flings proved that, so she took a page out of your book- if you can’t beat them, join them. She can play nonchalant too.

“Yeah, about that. I’m sorry I acted so weird after, like it didn’t happen. The truth is I tried to ignore it, but I can’t because it’s constantly replaying in my head. All I can think about is doing it again and I know I said we could only be friends, but-”

“You were right.” Wanda cuts you off early. “What?” you ask thoroughly confused. She continues, “When you said we should just be friends, you were right. It was silly of me to even suggest anything. I mean I’m leaving in five days, so what is the point right?” Wanda reasons with you and as you are about to rebut to say you can make it work, she continues, “I mean I’m probably not in the right headspace to start anything serious. Vision just broke up with me like a month ago.” 

You are starting to feel like you were gathering up courage for no reason, Wanda not letting you speak and stepping on every butterfly that had flapped its wings in your stomach with every word she says. “I came here to take my mind off of it and like magic, you appeared at the door- the perfect distraction.”

That is the blow to the gut you thought you could forget. You thought Clint was the one with perfect aim but Wanda impresses you with her accuracy, choosing the exact word that kills the last bit of hope left in you. On her side of things, Wanda thinks she is doing the right thing even though it kills her to push aside her feelings. Wanda thinks she is sparing you from having to turn her down again and sparing her feelings from having to hear you reject her once more. 

“So don’t worry about the fair. I can definitely say I was not thinking about Vision on the ferris wheel. You are most welcome to do it again anytime.” Wanda forces out a laugh. You didn’t think the sound that would always make you smile would ever make you want to cry. No, you were not going to cry about a girl, especially in front of said girl no less. 

You are angry with yourself. Angry for being so silly as to think this wouldn’t happen. You really played yourself here believing she would be nothing like Skye. It’s not Wanda’s fault. You know this. Still, you can’t help but place some blame on her, her and her stunning smile and her witty remarks and her gorgeous hair and her soft hands that would hold yours or playfully punch you when you joke around. You are angry and upset, and there are normal ways to deal with those emotions. You could yell, you could cry, you could mope and eat all the ice cream you wish, you could even, god forbid, go for a run, but all of those options are too rational for someone with impulsive tendencies. 

Instead, you blink away the tears that were forming, from anger or sadness you don’t know, and move exceptionally closer to Wanda reaching out to run your fingers through her hair. Her breath catches as she watches your eyes take in every inch of her face with a look she can’t quite place. Her heartbeat paces quickly when she catches your eyes glancing down to her lips and then coming back up to peer into her eyes.

“Friends kiss friends all the time, right?”

You hardly give Wanda any time to nod before you crash your lips onto hers. This time you give her time to respond and the second you feel her kissing you back, you push her to lie on her back. 

If a distraction is what she wants, you’ll show her just how distracting you can be.

______________________________________________________________________

One eternity later... je suis retournée! Thank you kind person who asked about me. I’ve been busy with school stuff but I’m done and graduating in two days so I finally have time to get back to this. So next update will probably be Sunday or Monday. Two more chapters left. 

Next chapter: ;) (aka writer struggles to describe things having no experience of doing such things)

Taglist: @madamevirgo @marvels-writings @gayarchnemissis @myperfectlovepoem @purplemeetsblue @magicallymaximoff @b0mbdotc0m @helloalycia @ironscarletwidowsoilder @cantcontroltheirfear @trikruismybitch @your-my-mission @imagine-reblog @fayhar @idek-5 @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo @bemyvitamin

[parker-razor]

many a dream about you

afab!reader x mando (no y/n)

5.2k words, 18+, EXPLICIT!! 

warnings: SMUT (extended warnings under the cut), mentions of injuries, unprotected sex (use protection!), very little editing

summary: when you and mando are forced to share a bed together, you end up having a dream that reveals more than you had hoped...

author’s notes: ahhhh! this is my first fic!! i’ll be honest, i got so excited i wrote most of this in one sitting. indulge me in some of my favorite smutty tropes about everyone’s favorite space dad!

extended warnings: oral (f receiving), wet dreams, thigh grinding, mentions of rough sex, multiple orgasms, overstimulation... i think that’s it

*****

Stars, you were exhausted.

You had just spent three weeks on the Razor Crest with the only bed available to you being a cheap mattress that might as well have just been a sack stuffed with sand. On top of the little sleep you were running on, you had just finished loading three bounties onto the Crest and into carbonite while Mando patched himself up. Dragging three grown men onto the ship and freezing them took all the strength out of you.

You finally collapsed into the pilot’s seat in the cockpit, catching your breath and giving your muscles a well-deserved break. Your eyes flutter closed as your body decompresses from the hard work and no sleep it’s been put through these past weeks. Mando had hired you just a month ago to look after the ship while he was away on hunts. Not to mention the little green gremlin he had adopted as his own, who kept you company and looked to you to get taken care of. It was much better than the life you had known; growing up on the outskirts of Tatooine was hard enough as is, but when your little shop had been pillaged and ransacked, you had nothing left on the small, desert planet. Mando had shown up just in time, sitting next to you in a dive bar.

*****

You had never seen one of his kind before, and to be honest, you were overwhelmed with the way he carried himself. He was big, towering over everyone he passed on his way to the barstools. You wondered why he even bothered if he couldn’t remove his helmet to drink, but you’d never ask. He sat himself just a few stools from yours, and after stealing a few glances with flushed cheeks, you finally opened your mouth to say something.

“Bounty hunters like you must be pretty busy on a planet like this,” you said, trying to talk over the loud band playing in the corner. “Not too many upstanding people tend to find themselves here.”

Slowly turning his helmet to face you, the Mandalorian said, “What does that say about you?”

Damn, you thought, he was quick to the draw.

“It’s not exactly my choice to live here. I’d give anything to get off this ball of sand.”

He says nothing, just turns his helmet forward again. You figure that’s the end of that, at least you tried. You can now say that you’ve talked to a Mandalorian before.

After a few beats of silence, he finally speaks. “Anything?”

You whip your head towards him, trying to figure out where this was going. Of course you wanted to leave, but you didn’t want to come off too eager in case he wasn’t serious.

“I mean, what do you have in mind?” you ask, trying to act as calm as possibly, but you couldn’t help but get a little excited at the prospect of leaving.

“I have… a son. He’s very small and can’t take care of himself yet. I don’t like taking him hunting, but I can’t leave him on the ship by himself,” he pauses, piecing together his words carefully. “I need someone to look after him.”

“So, I’d be his babysitter?”

“And ship sitter. Just keep it clean, nothing complicated.”

You pretended to ponder his proposition, but you knew you’d say yes almost immediately. There was nothing left for you here; no family, no livelihood, no friends. This was the best deal you had gotten in a long time. Except…

“So, what do I get in return?”

“I’d pay you, as much as I can afford. But you’d have your own bed and food.”

You’re sold.

*****

You’re brought back to the present when you hear Mando’s footsteps ascend the ladder to the cockpit. The child is holding onto him, smiling when he sees your face.

“How bad are you hurt?” you ask cautiously.

“I’ll live. Just a gash.”

“Well, I got the bounties in carbonite. But I gotta say Mando, I don’t know if I can sleep another night in a row on that shitty mattress.” He says nothing, and you haven’t figured out if that’s a good sign or a bad sign.

“Not that I don’t appreciate you making room for me! I’m just saying, I think we both need a proper rest tonight, especially after today,” you backtrack. You hear him sigh, nodding his head in agreement.

“Alright. I passed an inn on the way back here. Let’s see if they have any vacancy, hopefully with a bed better than the one you have.” You blush, embarrassed that you came off as ungrateful.

Mando was a mystery to you. He was quiet, a man of few words. It was especially hard trying to read him without being able to see any facial cues or expressions. Nevertheless, something about him exuded strength. He was much taller than you, but he was also just… big. Especially with all the beskar adding a whole other layer of strength. You couldn’t explain the attraction you felt for him. Something about how he towered over you, his visor boring into your face made you weak in the knees. How could you feel this way for someone who you’d barely talked to, let alone never seen their face?

He made you feel weak, but for some reason you liked that. Growing up on your home planet, you had to learn to fight for yourself. You were strong, with curves and muscles that showed just how tough life had made you. You never let a man make you feel less than or weak, always ready to defend yourself. But you liked that Mando made you feel small. It made no sense, but it also made perfect sense.

Sometimes at night, you’d let your hands wander. One hand wandered up to your face, whether to bite down on a finger or cover your mouth to keep yourself quiet, and the other down the front of your pants. Being around Mando so much made it difficult to wait until after he fell asleep to take care of the burning need you felt for him. You had your fair share of flings with the boys in your village, but none of them made you feel the way Mando did. With the most subtle actions he could make a heat blossom in your stomach and goosebumps spread over your arms. Sometimes the way he’d fly the Crest made you clench your thighs together; he looked so in charge in that pilot’s seat. Rubbing tight circles on your clit, clenching around nothing while angling your hips just right, you would be sent into orbit at the thought of his hands taking care of you instead.

After you and Mando had packed up your essentials, you got Grogu into his pram and headed off to the village nearby. You had no idea what planet you were on, but the flowering trees brought some joy to you. In the past weeks travelling with Mando, you had seen so many new things. You had never once left your home, and things like trees and streams had you in awe. You would never get used to how it made you feel.

The village was small, and it didn’t seem like there was anything else around for miles. You got to the motel, one of the larger buildings in the area. The lobby was small and surprisingly clean, much cleaner than the interior of the Crest. An older woman, the innkeeper you presumed, stood at the desk.

“We’d like two rooms. How much would that be?” Mando asked, not interested in entertaining niceties.

“So sorry sir, we only have one room available. A few of our rooms are under renovation, and there’s only one unoccupied that is fit to house anyone,” the woman said with a sickly sweet smile.

Mando sighed, obviously conflicted with the choice laid in front of him. He turned to you for your input.

“I- I don’t mind sharing a room. We don’t have to if you’re not comfortable, I just thought it be nice to escape the ship for the night.” You rushed your words out, feeling shy at the prospect of sharing the room with Mando. He had his own quarters on the ship, and you had yours, if you could even consider them quarters. After a few beats, Mando put some credits on the desk, and took the key the woman was offering.

Pushing down the excitement you felt, you grabbed your things that you had set down and followed Mando to your room. It’s not like you hadn’t been living in close proximity with Mando for the past few weeks anyways.

But this was different.

And you didn’t fully realize why it was so different until you opened the door to your room and saw that there was only one queen sized bed. Your jaw dropped, as you looked to Mando for his reaction. Nothing, as usual. He just walked into the room as if nothing had changed.

How was this gonna go? Were you just supposed to… share? The bed wasn’t puny, plenty of room for the both of you. But this was crossing a line that you didn’t even realize had been established. You didn’t really know much about each other and hadn’t been acquainted for very long. Not to mention the burning need you felt for him growing day by day.

And now you had to share a bed with him. No big deal.

Grogu’s cries for attention brought you out of your reverie of thoughts. You picked him up from his pram and placed him on the bed, allowing him to take in the room. The love and affection for the child had grown immensely since Mando had first introduced the two of you. You were initially shocked at how silently affectionate Mando was with him. You had never expected him to be the paternal type. You had yet to learn how the curious pair had found each other; a small part of you wondered if Mando looked similar to the child under his mask.

Mando had set his things on the chair in the corner and mumbled something about using the refresher. And as quickly as the door shut, you heard the shower turn on and the sound of beskar hitting the floor.

The realization that Mando was maskless, naked, just a few feet away sent a shockwave through your body. Was he tan? Did he have blond or brown hair? Was he truly strong or did the beskar just add extra bulk? You imagined he had scars littering his body, with chest hair dusting his front. The thought of it trailing down beneath his pants sent a shiver down your spine. Stars, your mind was in the gutter.

The sun had set, and Grogu’s eyes started to flutter and shut on one of the pillows on the bed. You picked him up and cradled him, resting your cheek to his. You savored moments like this; the ones that made your heart warm and full of comforting joy. Grogu’s breathing slowed, letting out snores every once in a while. You heard the shower shut off, and carefully placed Grogu into his pram, closing the top for him to sleep in peace.  

Mando stepped out of the refresher in a thin pair of sleep trousers, a similar shirt and, of course, his helmet. Your gaze made you realize that he was definitely not wearing underwear, not leaving much to the imagination. You felt your face heat up as you looked anywhere but at him, almost positive that your face has turned as red as the setting sun.

“Your turn,” Mando said as he sauntered to the chair in the corner. He placed his things on the ground, sat in the chair, and crossed his arms as if to get comfortable.

“You’re not sleeping over there, are you?” you asked.

“I… just assumed… I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Your blush was back with a vengeance.

“I don’t mind. We got this room to relax, and you sure as hell don’t seem at ease with the way you’re sitting.” He said nothing for a few moments before sighing and standing to walk over towards the bed.

Oh Maker, this is actually happening, you thought. What act was more intimate than sharing a bed with someone? Well, there was the obvious one, but…

You scurried to the washroom, desperate to cool yourself down and collect your thoughts. This didn’t have to be a big deal, and if you kept acting all standoffish like you had been, you’d chase Mando away with the bizarre energy you were emitting.

You splashed cold water on your face to calm your blush, brushed your teeth with vigor, and changed into your pajamas. Granted, they were much scantier than the ideal, but you hadn’t expected to be sharing a bed, let alone a room, with the Mandalorian.

Stepping out of the refresher, you see Mando lying in bed with the lamplight on. Maker, you wanted to nothing but climb in with him and lay on his chest…

His chest. This was the first time you’d seen him without all that bulky armor. Through his thin clothing you could tell he was strong, with broad shoulders and contoured muscle. His helmet turned towards you, and what you didn’t know was that he was eyeing you in your not-so-modest sleep clothes as well.

What you didn’t know was how Mando gazed at you when you held the child, cooing at him as he gently tugged on your hair or stroked your cheek. His helmet protected him from you finding out how often he stared at you in adoration. Your curves, your smile, your silent strength. Stars, he thought you were the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. But what you saw when he looked at you was a silent T-visor staring at you with no emotion.

After a beat, your gaze met the floor as you walked to the other side of the bed, closest to the window. You crawled under the covers, waiting for some quick comment or a reaction from the man next to you. Finally, he spoke.

“Are you sure you don’t want me in the chair?” he asked.

“Stars, Mando, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you’d want to be as far away from me as possible,” you responded, embarrassed.

“That’s- no, not at all. I, uh, just wanted you to feel comfortable,” he stumbled. You had never seen him so lost for words, so taken back.

“I promise, Mando, if anything I feel more comfortable with you next to me.” Oh Maker, why did you just say that? That was the most upfront you’d been with him. Just as you were about to take back your words…

“I feel the same,” he responded quietly. Stars, if your heart didn’t explode at his words.

It was quiet for a few moments, until you said, “Well… goodnight Mando.”

“Goodnight.” He turned off the lamplight and shuffled deeper under the blankets. You were unsure if you should stay as close to the edge as possible or be truly comfortable and let yourself get a little closer to Mando. Before you could make up your mind, exhaustion overtook you and you drifted to sleep.

*****

Mando stirred in your sleep, disturbed by something he hadn’t recognized yet. As he continued to drift in and out of sleep, he heard something that he wasn’t sure was a part of a dream or reality.

Quiet mumblings came from your side of the bed, mixed with indistinguishable groans. His instincts kicked in, becoming fully awake to survey the room for any threats. It took him a moment to realize that as you slept, you had moved closer to Mando – much closer.

Your leg was draped over his torso, with your chest pressed to his side and your arm resting on his chest. But what he noticed most was the way your hips rolled, your core grinding against the side of his thigh. Looking at your face, he could tell you were asleep. Your breaths grew heavier, quiet groans turning into moans. Mando felt his pants grow tighter, not know whether or not to wake you from your obvious wet dream.

Mando froze when he heard you say his name while your hips sped up. “M-Mando, don’t stop… Please…” Fuck, you were dreaming about him. He wanted nothing more than to rub the growing problem in his pants, but he knew that crossed a line.

As your breath started to hitch, he could tell you were getting close. Just as you were about to cum, you jolted awake, breathing heavily while taking in what was going on.

You looked down at the scene you had caused, rendered speechless. Flooded with humiliation, you jumped out of bed and ran to the refresher as Mando shouted your name. You slammed the refresher door and locked it, tears springing to your eyes. Fuck fuck fuck, this was bad. Did you just ruin everything? Mando must hate you now.

“Please open the door, I’m not mad. Let’s just talk,” Mando said through the door, not wanting to reveal how he felt behind a slab of wood. You said nothing, feeling utterly mortified. There’s no way you could look him in the eye (well, helmet) after getting yourself off on his thigh in your sleep. Fuck.

After twenty minutes of Mando trying to convince you that he wasn’t upset and he just wanted to talk, he gave up. Sighing, he pushed himself off the floor and went back to sit on the bed. Though the tension in his pants had gone down, he couldn’t stop thinking about the sounds you made. He looked down to see that you had left a wet spot on his leg, causing him to groan. He had to stop himself from thinking that way, at least for right now while you were upset.

Meanwhile, in the bathroom, you were in shock. You tried your best to recount what had happened, but it didn’t help that you were asleep for most of it. The dream you were having a blur; Mando on top of you, and the intense feeling of being filled to the brim. Then, you remember waking up to Mando staring down at you, putting two and two together, and that was that.

You realized that Mando was awake before you were, which means he was watching you… do that to him. He didn’t try to wake you up or stop you. He was watching you get off. That had to mean… he liked it. He liked seeing you like that. Right?

You slowly stood up from the bathroom floor, wiping the tears you didn’t notice had fallen down your cheeks. Taking a few deep breaths, you calmed your bedhead and opened the washroom door, rounding the corner to face Mando sitting on the bed.

He looked up from the spot on the floor he was staring at as he sat deep in thought.

“Are- are you okay?” he asked, uncertain of what he should say.

“I’m… I’m sorry. I was asleep and I wasn’t trying to make you uncomfortable,” you admit, eyes glued to the floor. A few moments of deafening silence pass, with you shuffling in the spot where you stood and Mando’s helmet fixed towards you.

“What did you dream about?” Mando asked quietly. The Mandalorian was normally so stoic and strong in his conviction that to hear his voice quiver in nervousness made your gaze shoot up to his.

“It’s… embarrassing. I don’t want you to think less of me.” Your face turned beet red, a trait of yours you didn’t realize you possessed until you met Mando. He was the first person to make you feel shy and flustered.

“I won’t, I promise. I just want to know… I need to know.”

“It was… about me. And you.” Mando rose to walk over to where you were standing, near the foot of the bed.

“What about us, exactly? You can tell me. Tell me everything.” You hesitated to meet his gaze, eyes wide and nervous.

“You were… on me. In me. All over me.” You felt yourself getting breathless as Mando got closer to you, as you retold your dream without getting too graphic yet still admitting that you had dreamt of him taking you.

“And was I gentle, or was I rough?” Mando’s voice grew husky, just as breathless as you. Maker, his voice made you weak at the knees.

“Gentle, at first. But the longer you went you got rougher. Much rougher.” Your voice dropped into a whisper as Mando found himself right in front of you, almost chest to chest. Your eyes dropped to admire his chest, what it’d look like without his shirt. You wanted to trace every scar that marked his skin, kiss him, bite him.

He grabbed your chin with his thumb and forefinger, drawing your gaze from his chest to his helmet.

“And which did you like better? Tell me,” he whispered through the modulator, but there was no filtering out how deep and raspy his voice had gotten, like you had never heard before.

“I… I was just happy you were touching me,” you whispered, in shock that this wasn’t just another dream. His hand drifted from your chin to your neck, caressing every inch of you. You closed your eyes, unable to believe that he was touching you without his gloves on.

Suddenly, both hands came to your waist and pulled you into his chest, your hands finding their place on his chest. You whimpered, never feeling so small, not knowing why you liked it so much.

“Do you want me to touch you, sweet one? Like I did in your dream?” he rasped.

“Please… please touch me, Mando.” He groaned at that, manhandling you so your back turned to the bed and quickly thrown onto the bed.

“I like hearing you beg, love. Beg some more for me.” You whimpered, flushed and embarrassed but in the best way. Mando yanked at your legs so they were hanging off the bed with him standing between your knees. His hands drifted from your stomach up to your breasts, squeezing them while his thumbs rubbed your hardened nipples through your shirt.

Unable to take it any longer, you sat up and yanked your shirt over your head as Mando did the same. His expanse of muscle was all you could think about, the thatches of chest hair made you want to run your hands all over him.

He dropped to his knees in front of you, playing with the waistband of your sleep shorts.

“Tell me, did I eat this sweet pussy of yours in your dream?” You moaned, unable to remember but wanting his mouth on you all the same.

“I want you to, but your helmet…” Mando grabbed the blanket that was at the end of the bed, throwing it so one end covered your stomach and the other fell near the middle of his back. Awkwardly, you saw him maneuver under the blanket to take his helmet off, and then your shorts.

Before you could say so much as a “please,” Mando’s mouth enveloped your cunt with his hot mouth. Your gasp was loud and ragged, not expecting him to feel this good. You felt him moan into you, licking from your hole up to the tip of your clit.

“Am I the one who made you this wet, my sweet one? You’re dripping onto the bed for me,” you heard him rasp under the blankets.

“Please, Mando, you feel so f-fucking good,” you gasp as he puts his mouth on you again. You reach under the blanket to grab his hair to pull him the exact spots you wanted his mouth to be. Maker, his mouth was immaculate. His tongue messily toyed with your clit, groaning in your cunt when you tugged his hair which sent vibrations everywhere.

When he found that one spot, just to the left of your clit, you started to feel that familiar tension in your stomach, the one you’d get when you’d touch yourself in the silence of night in the Crest. You tilted your hips just right as he sucked your clit into your mouth, letting out an animalistic moan.

As soon as you felt him hum into your cunt again, you were gone. You fell over a cliff higher than ever before as everything went utterly white, white in your vision and white noise in your ears.

Maker, you came so fucking hard. And through the whole thing, Mando licked and sucked at you, slowing down when you eventually came down. You felt like you were floating through the aftermath as Mando kissed the inside of your thighs, and through the reverie you were in you felt the tickle of facial hair on your skin. You smiled to yourself, finally able to know something about the appearance of the man you adored so.

Mando quickly put his helmet back on under the blanket before pulling himself over you, stroking your face with the back of his hand.

“Do you want more? Or do you want me to stop?” he asked. As spent as you felt, at the sound of his voice your body began rearing up for more.

“More. I need your cock, Mando, so badly,” you whimpered, feeling a brand new wave of wetness flood at the apex of your legs.

You picked your head up, finally wrenching your eyes open as you felt Mando start to take his pants off. You were very suddenly awake again when you saw his cock spring out. He was big, bigger than the boys you had taken by far.

“I- I don’t know if you’ll fit. I’ve never had a man bigger than you.”

“No, sweet one, you’ve only had boys. I can’t wait to be the first man who wrecks you,” he rasps into your ears as your hands wrap themselves around his neck and down his back. Stars, he was sexy, an odd mix of shy and domineering all at once.

He started rubbing the tip against your cunt, and suddenly you were on fire again. You had never tried to get yourself again after one orgasm, always too spent and high on dopamine to go again. So you never got to realize that once you had one, more orgasms were not very difficult to achieve. Until, Mando’s tip swirled around your clit and you could feel the coil tighten yet again.

“M-Mando, I’m gonna cum again if you keep doing that,” you whimpered, causing him to groan and only put more pressure on your clit.

“Then do it, my love. I want to see your face when you cum for me.” You let out a series of curses until you came again, slightly weaker than the previous one but it rocked through you. Before you could even come down, Mando thrusted himself into you in one go. You let out a yell bordering on a scream, feeling your pussy stretch itself to fit all of him. Stars, the burn of the stretch made you shiver.

“Oh f-fuck, my sweet girl has an even sweeter pussy,” he gasped as he started to thrust himself into you. “S-so fucking t-tight and w-warm, I’m not gonna last…”

Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as Mando’s thrusts sped up, slamming into you at an unfathomable rate.

“No no, look at me. Look at me while I’m making you feel good,” Mando growled as he grabbed your cheeks to make you look at his helmet. You tried so hard to keep your eyes open, but as Mando tilted his hips just right, jamming into your G-spot, you lost control over your body. You were saying something, but you were so far gone that you couldn’t decipher what it was.

“Is that- fuck- all you can say, pretty girl? Please? Please what? What do you need, fuck I’ll give you everything you want, just say the word,” Mando rambled, just as drunk on your pussy as you were on his cock.

“D-d-don’t stop, p-please don’t s-stop,” you uttered out, not completely sure if you were having one long orgasm or if it was building to something even bigger.

“I’m never gonna stop, baby, never wanna stop…” Without warning, an orgasm so strong racked through your body. You had never cum just from penetration before, but the way the hair at the base of Mando’s cock was brushing against your cunt as he fucked you sent you beyond the edge.

“Oh my fucking- stars, baby you’re so tight I can barely move… I-I’m gonna-“ Mando gasped as you felt him cum deep inside you, moaning louder than you thought he would.

You both gasped for breath, utterly exhausted from the best sex in both of your lives. Mando pulled out and laid next you on the bed, stroking your hair gently.

“I wish I could kiss you right now,” you croaked, voice almost gone from overuse. Silence fell over the two of you, and you wanted to take back your words, until…

“Close your eyes. And don’t open them. Promise?” he said.

“I promise, I swear I won’t,” you said, shutting your eyes with your heart leaping at the prospect of finally kissing him. After a few moments of the sounds of shuffling next to you, you felt a soft pair of lips meet yours. It was tentative at first, but after a few gentle pecks Mando caressed your face and kissed you with a passion so strong it took your breath away. You felt his mustache tickle your upper lip as he kissed like if he pulled away, he wouldn’t know what to do with himself.

When he finally pulled away, you reminded yourself to keep your eyes closed as he put his helmet back on. You pulled yourself over him, almost in the exact position you had found yourself in when you woke up from your dream, except this time Mando’s arm was draped under your neck.

“I’m glad we finally did that,” Mando admitted after a while. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since the first day you started living on the Crest.” You lifted your head from his chest and rested your chin on his right pec, gazing at his face.

“You mean that?” you ask.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

You grinned from ear to ear, thanking the Maker that this wasn’t just because Mando was horny and he had found you getting yourself off on him. He had wanted you, too.

“For a minute I thought…I thought you’d tell me to leave and never come back. I was so embarrassed to wake up like that. But… I guess it ended up helping us out,” you chuckled. You heard Mando chuckle too as his chest shook a bit, warming your heart.

“I will never ask you to leave. I want you to stay, I need you to stay,” he admitted quietly. “Plus, I don’t know anyone else who would take care of Grogu so well.”

“Oh, Maker, Grogu!” you exclaimed, realizing Grogu had been closed in his pram in the corner throughout the entire… act.

“The device is soundproof, he didn’t hear a thing,” Mando explained. You let out a sigh of relief.

“I don’t know, with those ears?” you laughed, hearing Mando laugh with you.

“Maybe they’re more for balance rather than hearing,” Mando replied, causing you to let out a loud laugh, making joy flood Mando’s body.

“We can only hope…”

[armpirate]

Kalla | Choi San || Chapter 2

MASTERLIST Previous || Next

Pairings: CEO!San x fem!reader

Genre: smut, angst, fluff, strangers to lovers.

Warnings: dom!San, sub!reader, voyeourism, use of sex toys, bondage, dirty talk, BDSM, exhibitionism, rough sex.

Summary: She was surprised by how fast her life went from the perfect fairytale to the destructive mess it had turned into. Dealing with a cheater ex boyfriend, having to move out to a different place because the house she lived in belonged to that man she once dreamed of spending the rest of her life with, while continuously being underappreciated at work... It was as if life was telling her to stop dreaming big, to go back to her small town, Bibury, and help her parents run the small farm her family had owned for decades.

At least until she received a call from her friend.

A sudden vacancy as an assistant showed up on one of her friend's system, having her being encouraged to take that big step and apply for it. She had no hopes for it. Mainly because she didn't have any experience on the field, and she didn't comply with most of the requirements that were added on the offer -and which most of them sounded ridiculous and exaggerated for the position, making her wonder who was the freak who needed so many guidelines in order to hire someone to pick up the phone and schedule events. 

Although that hotel she'd be working on was much more than anything she could've come up with. 

Choi San wasn't someone easy to deal with. After his previous assistant presented his resignation letter on his desk, he felt forced to start the whole selection process again -after merely two months. 

Sure that he was being way too strict, enough to find that anyone who applied for the position wasn't enough, he asked one of his friends to be in charge of the interviews and the selection of the most adequate candidate. 

Little did he know Wooyoung would hire the imperfectly perfect candidate for him, sure that she'd help him in many ways other than just in dealing with the responsibilities of his position. 

A new challenge will come their way as soon as she steps inside the hotel. 

Y/n will have to learn how to mold onto him and deal with all his small habits and requirements, and San will find himself trying to open up and let out all those same things that turned him into the person he was. 

The more she digs in Kalla and all of its secrets and exciting corners, the deeper she'll dive into San's heart and soul... Although, maybe, she won't be able to take it. 

Kalla opens its doors to you, sharing the vast amount of filthy and erotic plans it offers, and that you can join with a partner... Or maybe just by yourself. 

Hope you enjoy your stay.

Chapter duration: 16 minutes

Liz: Will you go?

Rosie: Of course she will

Joanne: Unless she wants us to drag her there

Y/n rolled at the on going conversation about her, which she ironically ignored as she saw it grow on the notifications that popped on her screen, and that she only checked because her phone didn't stop buzzing.

Joane: It's a good chance

Rosie: A good chance?

Rosie: She should be thanking whatever planets got aligned today to be offered that opportunity.

She should've seen it coming when she first sent the screenshot of the email to Lizzie, before calling her out for sending out her resume even though she explicitly asked her not to do it.

Joanne: Did she mute the chat?

She didn't, but her friend had just given her an idea she didn't think about. A few taps on her screen, and the notification didn't show up at the bar and didn't make her phone make a single sound.

Despite what her friends thought, she was able to recognize the big opportunity that was offered in front of her. It was the first thought that crossed her mind when she received the confirmation email from Lizzie's company, making her aware that she was still part of a process she didn't know she was involved in. And she wasn't able to control her stomach from turning upside down when, thirty minutes later, she received another email from another company, Kalla hotel, inviting her to one short interview to get to know her.

"Your interview will take place at 4 pm. In case you didn't assist, we will believe you aren't interested in the job position anymore and your application will be erased, along with all the information we gathered from you through your resume and LinkedIn".

Excitement was slowly being replaced by a jumping into the void sensation, something that didn't let her breathe properly as she reread the email for a third time. She thought all of that was too good to be true. Even if she showed up there, she probably would end up looking ridiculous the second the interviewer tried to engage in a conversation with her in Korean -she'd certainly kill Lizzie after that. She had gone through enough humiliation in the past month, she didn't need that interview to top the cake. Because it was obvious they wouldn't pick her among all the other candidates. And, suddenly, a new scary feeling ran through her from head to toe. What if she ended up being picked and had to change her life?

She remembered how difficult it was for her to move all the way from her hometown to London to study. The uncertainty, the stress... everything was way too fresh for her, even if it had been eight years since then.

It was better if she didn't go and stayed in her lane.

But if she went and gave it a chance...

No.

—Y/n —she heard Ava's annoying voice approaching her.

Maybe it was just her personal bias, but she swore hearing her speak was only comparable to hearing nails scratching a blackboard. It almost made her whole body squirm in disgust.

—You aren't busy, right?

Her boss had sent her a research task, to find out the most common tendencies in fashion for the year, she also had to check the social media from one of the companies they worked for, not to mention she also had to prepare the documents for the meeting that would take place the next day with one of the clients... But no, she wasn't busy at all.

—Why? —she limited herself to ask, forcing a small smile.

She hated Ava with passion. And it wasn't really a type of hate that came out of the relationship they could have, which was non-existent; but a hate that was forced upon her through her actions. Ever since she stepped inside the office, supposedly to replace her because she was hired for a different job, there was a silent war going on. Although maybe it wasn't since the very beginning, when Ava still thought she was too good for the job Y/n was going to do from then and on -and that belonged to her before. It actually started when she was forced to come back, realizing she closed doors and deals before the new one was settled. After coming back, there were two people doing the same task -and clearly, that couldn't happen.

For months, she had gone through Ava's judging glares and malicious ambiguous comments. And she thought it'd be better if she passed on the promotion to give it to her, making it clear she wasn't attempting to take her place and actually respected her experience in that company -and the field. She was wrong though, it only went worse from there. She was already excluded from some gatherings among the small group of friends in the company, but it was more evident as time went by. And, if she was invited, Ava always found a way to leave it clear she wasn't welcomed -last time, by being invited and then acting like she wasn't part of the plan. It wasn't like she cared about it, she had good friends to spend quality time with; but it also went worse in the workplace, purposely excluding her from decisions that were taken as a team.

She thought freeing her way would help the situation, but it only made her ego bigger, having her looking down at Y/n at the tiniest difference in positions.

—Can you do some scrubbing? The team received a lot of feedback from all the surveys that we did, and we need the results.

—Sure. Send me the file and I'll work on it once I'm done with the tendencies.

—I need the scrubbing by the end of this week.

Y/n lifted her eyes, enraged by the ironic smile that hinted how much she enjoyed adding so much pressure on her.

As much as she would have loved to say no, she knew she couldn't. She depended on the production she did to be considered for the next promotion -either in that office or in one of the offices spread all over Europe.

—I'll do what I can —she finally nodded.

—Good.

Not even a thank you. Y/n wanted to pretend to be surprised, but she was way too used to it.

The file showed up shortly after in her email, with nothing else other than the predetermined message that Google wrote down whenever a file was shared among users. But she still shrugged it off. Y/n ignored feeling dehumanized, convincing herself she was just exaggerating the situation and taking things out of proportion.

She didn't care about it. She was already used to it. And by the time she had been working there, she had learnt to put her brain to rest when those thoughts started invading most parts of her mind.

Work was always the best way to move on from them.

At least until later that morning, when not even work was able to put her thoughts in a second place.

She was inside the small closet, where all the cleaning products were in case there was an emergency -which her coffee rushed to make after lunch all over her table. Although her body froze on the spot when she heard a voice approaching. Y/n wasn't exactly shy, but she hated those uncomfortable moments, where you had to fake a smile after you encountered someone you weren't really in a mood to see. And her boss was the last person she needed to see that day.

—It's been a busy week, but thankfully we managed to pile up all the necessary information —Adelaide stopped talking for a few seconds—. Of course, mister Banks.

Y/n recognized that name, he was one of the most important customers working with the agency. And, because of that, she worked harder on any task related to his project, looking for a visibility that could open her a door in case she decided to leave Youth for good.

—I'm glad you liked all the information we gathered, and the way it was presented. I'm really lucky with the team I have.

And just like that, her boss kicked all her effort away.

If there was any door possibly open, Adelaide slammed it in front of her face without giving it a second thought. She had done most of the work, she implanted creative ideas that even her boss praised and encouraged, and she dealt with the way it'd be presented to appeal to the design of the customer's company. Only for it all to be reduced to teamwork. A team work that never existed.

—Oh yes, Ava will lead the presentation with your partners. She's really excited to take over such a big chance.

Something broke inside of her. Her throat closed, almost as if someone was holding it in a tight grip under her skin, making it difficult for her to even breathe. She wasn't aware when she started crying, but she heard the dry sound of one of the teardrops falling over the fabric of her sneakers, rushing her to move the reverse of her hand over her cheeks and eyes to clean them up.

It was so unfair, so annoying... it made her feel so worthless. She was the one who should be presenting her work, not someone else.

She held onto the strip of her bag, looking at the building ahead of her nervously, feeling like it was taller than it was as she suddenly became smaller.

She had been thinking about the interview all day, she had been trying to fight whether to attend or not. After what happened in the archive -or better, after what she heard-, all of her will to work flew out of the window. She couldn't find any reason why to do it, and she for sure could find no motivation either. The constant questions wondering what was the point of working hard, or what would be her future in Youth were eating her alive. Or what would happen if they didn't renew her contract, or took longer than she wanted to to be promoted. She was unable to focus on her work, bombarded by her own thoughts .

Thinking about it, she didn't even finish the scrubbing that needed to be done, and that made Ava's tongue clicking sound echo in the office.

All of her questions, all of her doubts, all the reasons that left her pain aside were right in front of her, inside the tall hotel she never thought she'd step in.

She checked herself out on the clean glass that gave a clear reflection of her full body, twisting her mouth as she tried to settle the collar of her white blouse, only to have it back to the way it was before she touched it.

The reception had high walls and a long and big black counter right in the middle, with four people behind it. Her eyes lowered to her phone, checking the location again to be sure of what was the place she needed to ask four.

—Good afternoon. How may I help you? —the tall blonde woman, with both of her hands crossed over her lower belly, asked with a huge smile.

—I'm looking for meeting room number four? I don't really know if it's right. I have a job interview...

Bella, or the name she assumed she had by the white green tag hung over her dark blue blazer, gave her a comforting smile, instantly nodding.

—There have been people coming and going the past two days —she tried to reassure her—. I'll take you there. If you may follow me.

Y/n didn't know if that relaxed her a bit, or if that made her even more nervous. But she still found a way to follow the receptionist through the reception, getting into a long and wide corridor that had big translucid walls of glass every few meters, where she wasn't able to see the inside but the shape of the people that were inside of those rooms.

—You said a lot of people have been coming and going... —Y/n mentioned— What was the vibe when they left?

—The vibe? —Bella frowned, momentarily looking back at her— I guess there was a bit of everything: some were upset, others relieved, others angry... I don't really know much, but seems like the recruiter is pretty exigent.

Y/n nodded, gulping thick as she realized she was doomed whatever she said in that interview.

Probably, most of the people that left were more prepared than her. Or, at least, knew something that she didn't: the language of the country she'd work at and what was the exact position Liz applied to.

—Good luck —the blonde girl whispered as she stopped by one of the doors towards the end of the corridor, knocking at the door before leaving.

—One second —a male voice screamed from inside. After a few seconds, when she was able to hear her own breathing, he spoke again—. Come in.

Y/n pressed her lips tight, holding the silver door knob and pushing it down to get the door to open. The small room kept the same decorations and colors as the rest of the hotel, fully white with some features on the furniture in blue. The only thing that escaped the main colors were the black laptop and the man in front of it.

—Take a sit, please —he invited her.

She moved to the desk shyly, taking small steps until she reached one of the chairs to sit on it.

The man didn't seem much older than her, she'd bet he was just two or three years older. His black hair wasn't too long -enough to pick up the top on a tiny ponytail, but too short to get all of it in it-, and styled in a way that his bangs didn't move a single millimeter to his face to interrupt what he was looking at in the computer. He also wasn't as formal as she thought he'd be. Instead of the regular suit, he was wearing a blue cardigan, with nothing underneath, that allowed her to see just a glimpse of his chest.

—Y/n, right? —he interrupted, finally looking at her— You're ten minutes early.

—Am I?

She slapped herself mentally at that answer. She should've nodded and backed up the reason, giving an answer that could relate to an aptitude applicable to the position. It was already too late to change it.

—Uh-hum —he nodded—. I'm Jung Wooyoung, by the way. And I'll be leading the interview.

—Nice to meet you —she dedicated him a small smile.

He smiled back, slightly bowing at her response before he completely turned his attention on her.

—It'll be quite simple and fast —Wooyoung introduced—. You'll tell me a bit about yourself, I'll ask you some questions regarding the position, we'll also do a short practical case and we'll finish with your questions if you have any. Is that right?

—Yeah.

—Okay, start.

As she tried to think where to start exactly, she saw him getting comfortable on his chair, placing his back against the backrest. In that moment she regretted being such a conformist for the past two months while she struggled with anxiety, instead of looking for other jobs that could've given her the experience in job interviews she needed for that -or, at least, a refresher of what it was like.

—I'm currently working in a Marketing agency, as you could check in my resume. I've been working there for almost a year, doing tasks that are related to team assistance. And I also finished the Associate Degree in Business Administration four years ago.

—Why do you think you're a good candidate?

—I'm organized, I know how to work well under pressure, and I'm really passionate. I also know how to use all the resources at hand to be as efficient as possible. And I'm a fast learner. I get things easily to put them into practice fast.

—What are your strengths and your weaknesses?

— Strengths? —her eyes moved up, trying to find an answer— I'm patient, and I really mean it -I've been holding back a lot in my current position —Wooyoung giggled at that mumbled comment—. I'm also optimistic. It doesn't matter how hard the situation is, or how stressful, I always work hard to see the positive side to be able to focus on finding a solution and the proper organization. About the weaknesses...

She could've gone to the typical "I'm a perfectionist", which wasn't exactly a lie, but she didn't see it as a weakness either. Since when doing your job as good as you could was something negative?

—I'm too empathetic —she finally answered—. I guess my emotions lead my actions most of the time.

As much as she wanted to hate Ava for her attitudes, Y/n had always tried to find the reason why, getting to understand why she'd feel threatened by the new person, to the point of justifying some of her actions.

The corners of Wooyoung's eyes squinted as his smile widened at her response, nodding before he continued:

—Honestly, those three are traits you'd need to work with San —he joked—. Especially patience.

Y/n understood that he wasn't the one she'd work for.

—Do you know what's Kalla? —he felt forced to ask— Did you ever hear about it, or found information about it online?

—I know it's a hotel in Seoul after looking it up.

After looking it up, or after doing two plus two with the information Lizzie gave out as she insisted she take the interview.

—But do you know what type of hotel?

—You mean luxurious, familiar...? That type?

—Before we go on, I'm forced to tell you the nature of the hotel —he sat straight back again—. It's a love hotel.

She could feel how the muscles in her face were fighting not to open her mouth wide at that introduction.

—Kalla is a hotel that opened four years ago, and that has been consistently receiving visitors from all over the world. But also, Kalla is a line of intimate products that sells worldwide, and that has a tight connection with manufacturers in the United Kingdom. That's why English is non-negotiable. You'll assist the owner of the company, by doing the secretary work you probably know about, but you'll also do work as a communication point for partners, suppliers, clients, and you could also be required to assist the Marketing team every once in a while.

—I see —she nodded.

Considering the type of hotel it was, Y/n could just imagine the type of intimate products Wooyoung was referring to. And, all of a sudden, the position wasn't as attractive to the point of her being nervous over not getting it.

—Leaving that clear, I think we could start with the practical case. Let's say you're in charge of organizing an event in the hotel, but as a supplier, I didn't comply with the arrangements we agreed on.

As Wooyoung started to speak, Y/n paralyzed. Of course he was going to test her Korean, at the same time he tried to test her resolution skills. To avoid the uncomfortable silence that was starting to build up under his insisting gaze, Y/n finally spoke:

—I... I don't speak Korean.

Although she understood some expressions, and was proud at how she managed to understand more words than she initially expected.

—What? Your resume says...

—My friend probably added that part —she interrupted him.

Wooyoung's disappointed expression got her ready for the words that would come out of his mouth shortly after.

—I really liked your profile, but I don't think you adapt to the necessities of the position. Youdon't speak Korean, and we also need someone who has over four years of experience in a similar position, doing similar tasks.

—Four years of experience? —she cut him off, opening her eyes wide— I mean, I'd have those four years of experience if recruiters didn't keep saying they want freshly graduated people to have a decade of experience —she scoffed, trying to think through what she was saying.

—Well, it's not exactly a requirement I added, but the CEO. He wants someone that could quickly adapt to the position.

—Tell the CEO to burst his own bubble. Does he think he won't have to give some adaptation period to a person with experience? Maybe in his fairyland he won't, but in real life working fields are different, software varies from one business to another. He'd still need that person to get used to a lot of different things. Ialso don't speak Korean, so what? The translator exists. And I speak English in my current job, and it isn't like it kept my boss from degrading me. I'm a fast learner, I'm a hard worker. If you miss on it, it's your loss.

She wasn't quite sure if those last words were actually aimed at Wooyoung or at Adelaide.

She knew there was no possible way to save herself after that, she knew she was wrong in the majority of things she was saying, but she was in too deep to eat each one of those words. She couldn't backtrack after she started vomiting nonsense.

A sigh announced she was back to her senses.

—Sorry to have wasted your time.

Before Wooyoung could even speak, Y/n was already picking up all of her things and walking to the door to close it behind her.

He giggled, taking his phone out to send:

"I think I've finally found the perfect candidate for you". 

[apixrl]

YOUR EREN.

eren jeager x fem!reader

WARNING(S): angst. slight manipulation. s4 spoilers. brief mentions of (but not actually) throwing up at the end.

word count: 5.9k

song: a soulmate who wasn't meant to be // jess benko

note(s): oh, that sound? it's just the sound of my tears whilst writing this oneshot. no biggie

The prison cells underneath headquarters were as dark and dreary as ever as you stood opposite them. Whilst the windows were generously large, the night sky was not so giving. Clouds were gloomy and blocked out the moon and stars, replacing it with a heavy downpour of rain. If you listened closely, you could pick up on the faint 'pitter patter' as droplets met the pebbled ground outside, the sound comforting compared to the echoing silence within the walls. Mattresses were placed in the corners of each cell, old and tattered after years of use by many different faces. You could only imagine their discomfort as you'd never been required to sleep on them, your record in the Scout Regiment practically a clean slate after your years of service. You were someone who took your position as a soldier seriously; respected your superiors and did as told when told.

As for Eren Jeager? It seemed in recent events he was past the point of caring.

Such a fact was blatant as you stared at him through the prison bars, your back pressed against the wall, body stiff and fearful of what would happen if you tried to step closer. Eren's gaze was terrifying to witness even from the odd angle you stared at him. His eyes locked on the ceiling as he lay flat on his back on the bed of his cell. His hair had been pulled back into a messy bun, some strands not long enough to reach so far back were fated to live a life of their own. They glued to his temples and forehead and even entwined with the strands pulled back. You couldn't decide if the look was flattering or not.

"I...," You blurted out without thought of what you planned to actually say, your pathetic attempt at making conversation followed up with a nervous whimper. Eren barely inched a muscle when you broke the quiet, from his eyes to his hands that lay lifeless at his side. He remained laid down as if you weren't even there. That made your heart weep in the worst of ways and your mind qualm - to think the last time you were together he was holding you in his arms as you gazed under the stars. And now he could barely spare you a second glance.

"It's been a while since you were last cooped up in one of these cells," You eventually tried again, calming yourself down as best you could by trying to be light-hearted. "Remember when we would play cards through the bars when I could visit? Those were fun times," You smiled sadly at the memories, eyes drifting away from Eren and towards nothing in particular. The smile then faded, the yearn to experience easier days once more hitting you as hard as stone. "If only we could experience them again,"

Your tone lowered, left unhinged since you knew mourning for what was no more was a waste of time. But you couldn't help yourself. All you wanted was to live in the past, where the titans were slane and the Scouts had reached the sea. All you wanted was to live out your days with your friends, talk and laugh with no need to worry about the rest of the world. All you wanted was to fall into Eren's embrace, to love him with all your might as he did you. There was a short period where that was your life, one filled with simplicity and peace after years of blood and death and gore that haunted your every nightmare. It had been pleasant, and you missed it. More than you were willing to admit.

If only Eren hadn't pushed things too far.

Eren's eyes shifted after a prolonged silence, travelling from the ceiling to you across the way. He was quick to take note of your vacancy, your conflict as you stared at him. How you created your own form of a jail cell by restricting yourself to the opposite side of the room. Maintaining a safe distance like you sensed you would get hurt stepping too far. Eren sighed loudly at that fact. Which caught your attention, E/C eyes flicking back to him at the sound. Eren pushed himself upright, eyes leaving you to stare at the floor before he hoisted himself off of the bed. Then, he turned to face you, searching for you through the wisps of his unkempt fringe.

You held your breath when he did, unable to fathom just how uncomfortable his gaze made you feel. Typically, Eren looking your way would send butterflies to your stomach. Your heart would perform somersaults and beat soundly with joy. Your cheeks would heat up, to which he would smile and tease and call it cute - merely deepening your flustered state like it was some fun game.

But this time, upon him meeting your gaze, nausea swiftly followed after. Rising concern over unconditional love based on his expression alone. It was empty. Unreadable. Nothing you had ever seen him display before. You had witnessed most if not all his worst moments up front but none of them - none of them, came close to just how desolately devoid he looked in that moment.

His lips didn't twitch, firmly held together as they added to his glaring aura. His brows arched sterner than Captain Levi's when you failed to clean a room up to standards, you didn't think it was possible for them to be so closely knit. But the worst part that made you truly sick to the stomach at the unfamiliarity of it all, were his eyes. Their usual bright and gleaming jade green blend that had entranced you from the instant you met Eren were now bleaker and more stationary than ever. They no longer held a zest and determination that motivated you to fight another day, no notable twinkle against the dimly lit room. Only a barren vacancy the most broken are succumbed to display.

You felt the need to comment on it, communicate to Eren just how worried you were. That you wanted to help him because you cared about him more than anyone else in the entire world. You were willing to lay your life down for him, and had even nearly become an anonymous number in the ranks because of that sheer will alone. However, before you had the chance to open your mouth, Eren beat you to it.

"Did Hange send you down here to try and sway me?" Eren asked half-rhetorically, taking a couple of steps forwards until the bars of his cell stopped him. "You of all people should know you can't stop me, so why even bother?"

You were taken back by his bluntness, even more so by his disregard for your previous words. Like you had never said them in the first place and he was the one initiating conversation. Perhaps it was so Eren felt he had the control, asserting dominance in a relationship where he already held more than half of it. His aim was unclear, but you persisted nonetheless.

"No, they didn't," You said. "I came here on my own accord, Eren," You shrugged your shoulders aimlessly. "I wanted to see you. I-I've missed you," Eren's eyes narrowed in suspicion, studying your frame for any sign indicating you were lying. He came out with no clear answer as from the instant you had set foot in the room you'd been shaking like a lamb bleating after its mother. Afraid. His arms crossed over his broad chest still in doubt, the action reminding you just how much he'd changed over the last few years. He was taller, looming over you even whilst feet apart. He was no doubt stronger, evident with or without the fact he held the power of three titans within him. Eren was no longer the vigorous and unruly boy he once was, who devoted his strength to rid the world of all the titans. He was now an indestructible force that vouched for freedom, his will to fight unshaken by no one.

"If you missed me so much," He started, looking down at you with what only felt like shame. "What took you so long to visit?" Raising a brow, you realised he held a point with his inquiry. If you proposed you missed him why hadn't you visited? The truth was you were scared of who you would find on the other side when you did. Levi and Hange had given you the option since the first day Eren was placed in his cell. But no matter the undying need to have Eren in your line of sights again, you failed to find the courage to make that final step.

"I wanted to, I-I really did," You said in a panic. "I was just scared! I didn't know what to say or how to speak to you after... after...,"

"After what?" Eren reprimanded, glowering at you as his hands wrapped around the iron bars. Your eyes widened and you whimpered, shaking your head frantically as a means to apologise.

"N-No Eren. I didn't mean it like that I just -," You swallowed thickly, your breathing quickening as Eren's pressing stare intimidated you more and more by the second. You hated how much you were falling apart. Where had your Eren gone?! Your Eren who always fretted over you during and after battles. Your Eren who grew antsy at Jean or Connie if they got a little too comfortable in your company. Your Eren who snuck into your room past curfew to share stories of his life late into the night. Your Eren who crammed his lips on yours when he couldn't hide his feelings any longer, confirming your relationship would turn from friendship to deepened love. You missed your Eren. You wanted your Eren back. Was that so much to ask?!

"You just what?" He spoke harshly, impatience riddled within every letter and syllable. You were quick to notice his grip on the bars tighten to the point you thought he'd snap them clean in two.

"I...," You trailed off, finishing your cut sentence with a defeated sigh. Your hands lowered to your sides as your head hung forwards. Perhaps being upfront with him was the only way you could go. "You killed people, Eren. Innocent people that hadn't done anything wrong! You ate somebody. Women, men and children crushed under debris like they were nothing. Y-You... you made Armin destroy that port and your decision making got Sasha killed!" You brought a hand to your forehead, not realising how distressed you sounded as you recalled that night. Tears started forming in your eyes, lip trembling. "Shit! I nearly... if Jean hadn't shot that Marley soldier first then I would've...,"

You had experienced a rocky start during the raid on Marley. One of your biggest flaws as a soldier was your will to take another life. Life as in... a human life. You despised the concept and did everything in your power to avoid it all costs, even if your fellow soldiers disagreed (especially Levi's, who persisted humans could be just as bad as titans when it came to killing). That exact flaw came forth when you first encountered a Marleyan soldier, and your hesitation almost ended with a bullet between your eyes. Had Jean not been behind you just in time... your grave would have been undoubtedly determined. There was a time where Eren was the same as you, never wanting to act and inflict harm on other humans. But times had changed since then. Oh, how you hated how much it had changed since then. None of it was fair.

A silence ensued, your stifled sobs the only thing willing to break it. Eren watched you motionlessly, the glare still apparent on his face as your emotions got the better of you. You hadn't realised just how shaken up you were from what happened. Sure, you had faced death many times, but always at the hand of titans. Where you had to evade giant swooshing limbs and teeth that could churn your flesh as cows do cud. Never had you looked another human in the eye and watched them contemplate killing you. To aim a gun directly your way and prep the shot as you realised what their intentions were. Then a feeble attempt to escape approaching death, all too distracted with your life flashing before your eyes for you to see the way out. That was one of the scariest moments of your life. You never wanted to endure it again. Never.

"Come here,"

You stiffened up, looking at Eren amidst dishevelled strands of H/C hair falling over your face. His glare had left and his face had returned to its neutral state, his eyes boring into you with his demand lingering in the air. You wiped your nose on your sleeve as well as your eyes, confused by the abrupt change in atmosphere. A truly weird circumstance and turn of events you weren't expecting indeed. At first, you weren't sure doing as Eren said was a smart idea, having heard Hange's experience with him during a debrief. You didn't believe Eren would treat you with the same sort of disrespect, but you also didn't want to take that risk just in case.

"B-But...,"

"Just do it," He roughly snapped, suspense in his tone kicking you up the hind to move. With a yelp, you pushed yourself off of the wall - back sighing out in bliss after starting to ache because of the uneven rocky surface. You gingerly stepped towards Eren, biting down on your lip to stop it trembling in fright. You came to a stop once close enough to the iron bars, hands going to wrap themselves around them, around the same ones as Eren. Whether you intended for that or it was just subconscious instinct you didn't know. Finally, your eyes dropped to the floor, lost on where to focus. Eren hummed a complacent sigh at your actions, head tilting to the side as he looked you up and down. You couldn't find an answer to what was running through his mind, blank gaze concealing all form of emotion and clarity. Then, just as you thought the silence couldn't grow any more powerful, Eren lifted his hand and reached out for you.

You gasped at the sudden contact, the feeling of Eren's hand cupping your face sending all sorts of sensations through you. His palm was warm despite the cool air of the prison cell. It was as though his hand was constructed to cradle your cheek, moulded into the perfect structure to which you filled in the empty spaces. His hand felt soft even after years of wear and tear of fighting and training, fingers long but not at all discomforting. You had forgotten just how pleasant the feel of Eren's thumb across your cheekbone was until he initiated the motion, almost a way to lure you in. And with your deprivation of his touch - of him. That was enough to have you wrapped around his finger.

"I forgot how nice it was to hold you like this," Eren declared monotonously, though his expression betrayed his lack of care. Something about it had calmed, but he didn't allow it to stay for long, gone so fast that if you blinked you would have missed it. You inhaled deeply, head tilting to the side as you nuzzled into his hand. Seeming satisfied with that, Eren proceeded. "That and just how easily you melt under my touch,"

"Eren," You uttered no louder than a whisper, eyes closing tight as you welcomed his touch. You despised how much he was correct, that you became putty without him even needing to try. That was the impact of love, after all, it makes people act in crazy ways and do some incredibly crazy things. But you couldn't ignore the odd funny feeling still pitting your gut, begging you to stop falling to Eren's will before it was too late. You couldn't get carried away, he had committed obscene criminal acts without jurisdiction. That was more than enough to get him locked up for life, regardless of the war you were fighting. You should be disgusted by his actions, his corrupted thinking and the way he went behind the Military's backs to further his own idea of freedom. You were disgusted.

But you also loved him. Way, way more than you were disgusted.

A frown merged onto your face, blending awkwardly with the once peaceful content that Eren noticed as fast as it appeared. He managed to figure out the thoughts running through your mind also, the young adult lamenting a sigh and he opened his mouth to speak. Not before his hand drifted down to your chin, tilting your head up to make you look at him. His thumb planted on your bottom lip as he grazed over it.

"I'm trying to build a future for Eldia, Y/N," Eren spoke firmly, your heart having a brief elation to the way he said your name. It had been far too long since you had heard him say it. "A future for us, where we can be free and live our lives the way we want to,"

"I know," You began, eyes opening to meet Eren's. "But there are other ways, Eren. More humane ways. We don't have to kill anymore if we just-,"

"There isn't another way," Eren interrupted, his ministrations of stroking your chin coming to an abrupt halt. "We've tried other ways and they haven't worked," Eren evaded your disheartened stare. "I'm sick of it not working,"

"We all are, Eren. Stop making out that you're the only victim here," You paid no mind to Eren's reaction. "We're all victims of this shitshow that's our reality, and we're all just as much the culprits of it as well! All w-we do is fight fire with fire and add more ashes to the pile with each person we slaughter," You felt your grip tighten on the bars, gritting your teeth harshly together. "I'm sick of all the violence and suffering! I just want to go back to the days when we could be at peace. Where we could laugh and joke because the main problem - the titans, were dealt with! I became a soldier to fight titans, not to embark on an endless war where both sides are human and neither is willing to cooperate with the other,"

"Those days are gone," Eren spoke sternly, though it softened up when he noticed you look away. "But they can return," He pressed his forehead against the iron bars, staring at you through deadened eyes. "We can live a life of freedom together once I finish what I started, all I need you to do is stay by my side and to have faith,"

Your eyes widened, gawking at Eren with complete and utter disbelief at his words. His persistence came off like the cruellest of sicknesses, corrupting Eren's mind to the point of insanity. His moral compass was in shambles as was his sense of humanity. The way his eyes were numbed right down to their pupils, blinded by his visions of a future for Eldia that came with the cost of the rest of the world's suffering. It pained you to witness such a change, to witness Eren's descent into madness as war took over his every thought and breath. Suddenly that foreign feeling in your stomach became clear as day, and you abhorred it with a deadly passion.

"I don't want to be free in a world built on other people's suffering," Your hands fell down to your sides, heartbeat racing as you avoided Eren's gaze. He quirked a brow, eyes piercing into you once he realised what you meant, and his chosen tone suggested he didn't like that one bit.

"What are you trying to say?"

You faltered, both as a mental brace and a state of refusal to your next actions. A second or so passed before you took a step back, creating a distance that did more damage than healing. With a shaky breath, you answered his question.

"I love you Eren, with everything I am. B-but I can't stand by your side if this is the path you're going to take," The tears were already brewing, doing everything you could to blink them away. "I won't sit by and watch the rest of the world crumble because of your selfish desires,"

You hated the words you were saying, how you said them and who you were saying them to. That it had all come to this, where Eren became the threat to humanity rather than its saviour. He only had so much time left and had you known that his way of spending it was to spiral the world into chaos - perhaps you wouldn't have grown so attached.

"I can't - I...," Since he hadn't said anything, you felt the urgency to speak. "Eren you have no idea how much I want to but this isn't how I saw our future -,"

"What future?" Eren persisted, not giving you a chance to reply. "Eldia has no future within the walls, these cages! It's time we give the world a taste of its own medicine, so what if a couple of lives are taken out on the way? It's not like they give a damn about ours," Eren scoffed when you shook your head, tears pricking at your eyes and the stinging sensation that came with it was painful to deal with.

"Please, Eren. Think about what you're saying," You pleaded and begged. But you knew it was no use, Eren too fixated on his 'destiny' to see logical reason. Merely the look in his eyes was proof enough to tell you that. "What happened to you? When did you become so heartless? Where's the Eren I knew all those years ago gone? Don't you miss it back then? When we weren't cheating death and we could simply be us? Be two dumb teens in love and the only thing that mattered was that love we shared? Do you even think about that anymore? About me? What about -,"

"Stop it," Eren stopped you, voice acting as a silencer to your blubbering drabble. Flinching at the interruption your mouth clamped shut, and your eyes darted for Eren in surprise. Despite locked behind bars, you were still terrified, and it felt more like you were the prisoner of the pair. With a low growl, Eren raised a clenched fist and thrashed it harshly against the bars. It made a low but loud 'thunk!' sound that hit your ears like impending doom, deafening all around you excluding that of Eren and the words he uttered next. "I'm sick of listening to you whine about shit that's not even important,"

"W-what?" You stammered in question, voice unsteady. "What do you mean it's not important?"

"Do you really think that amidst all of this I have time to be playing boyfriend?" Eren half-mocked. "I've got bigger priorities than you right now," He didn't look you in the eye, nostrils flared as his gaze lingered on the floor. Your legs nearly gave way at what you were hearing, each word a fatal stab to the stomach. Each stab even more malicious than the last. So that was it? You didn't matter anymore? Were you just some pawn in Eren's plan until he didn't feel he needed you anymore? Had his love ever been real or was it all a hoax to manipulate your every waking thought?

A minute passed of still silence, one of the many that evening. Your eyes never left Eren, searching for something to indicate he was joking. As well as contemplating pinching yourself in hopes you woke up from this horrible nightmare. Maybe you'd wake up in your Eren's arms, safe and secure as you lay beside him - his gentle breaths from deep sleep tickling the back of your neck and helping you forget the entire reason you woke up. But sadly, no such thing happened. You never woke up from anything but were instead left to face an Eren you barely knew anymore. Endure the pain as he pounded words into your head that gashed crueller than the worst of war wounds.

Realising this, you felt an urge to laugh, unsure what else there was you really could do. Crying was ineffective, and there was no way you could let Eren get the better of you. That's probably what he wanted anyway, for you to turn around and beg on your hands and knees. So as your hand met your face, you released the smallest of chuckles, lacking in humour but overwhelmed with an unforeseen emptiness. It definitely caught Eren by surprise, but he was fast to not hide it as he pressured that vacant stare onto you yet again.

"You insist your plan is the only way to get us our future, but I'm not even sure what future you mean anymore," You hesitated, trying to gain control of your lip which began to quiver erratically. "Clearly it's not the one we imagined together when we were younger,"

"If only you weren't so blinded by your emotions," Eren avoided your words, something you noticed and felt more agonised by than relieved. "Stop thinking with your feelings and see the logic, already. It's so annoying,"

Almost choking on the sob you tried to hold down, you bit down harshly on your lip - any harder and you probably would have drawn blood. You did everything you could to ignore Eren's words, but you were so hurt that you were losing the means to do so.

But you couldn't let his words consume you and manifest them into truth. You had to be strong, use whatever power you had left to regain your composure and come out the bigger person. Eren had always been a stubborn brat, Levi's nickname reigning true now more than ever.

"Use your head and think, Y/N," Eren spoke slowly, leaning his weight back onto one foot. He stretched his arm out towards you, held out for you to take. "Maybe if you stop caring for those that'll just kill you off for sport you'll actually comprehend why you're following the wrong cause,"

His words were suffocating and barbaric, not at all inspiring or persuading in the slightest. It didn't make you feel hopeful, it made you feel trapped. All you wanted was for it to stop. It wasn't love no matter how much you adored him. It wasn't healthy no matter the good memories you had shared. You had to stop the past messing with your head. You had to stop Eren messing with your head. You wanted to get out and escape. You needed to and as soon as possible. So, taking a moment to regain your composure, your hands raised to adjust the collar of your jacket and you looked over at Eren. An apologetic expression on your face for deciding to cut the visit short.

"I think I should... should go check on Armin and the others," You started, not sure what Eren would make of that. He appeared to show confusion, blinking once your words processed and frowning based on how sudden they were.

"Why would you need to do that?"

"They've been busy, and they're probably looking for me," You made up on the spot. "I didn't tell them I was coming to see you," Eren was silent, eyeing you up and down before he scoffed.

"You know I can tell you're lying, right?"

"W-Why would I lie?"

"For the same reason all people lie," Eren said. "To avoid what you're too scared to face," The way Eren spoke made everything feel much, much worse. A heavy amount of disrespect originated from this new flesh of conceit that Eren displayed on full. He had always been one to boast, but never in the form he showed in the present.

Listening to his slander any longer was something you simply couldn't handle. Not today, anyway. Fatigue was starting to claim control over your thought process, emotionally drained from talking to Eren. He had selfishly left you in a constant state of confusion and agony, making you ask yourself more questions than answering them. It utterly and totally sucked, being honest, and you had no clue where your relationship stood. Was it over? Were you still even together? Had he even seen you both as a couple this entire time or was it all just a big lie?

"So what were you trying to avoid when you spent all those months lying to us?" You were tempted to leave without another word said, but you knew you'd regret not asking your question. Which had popped into your head at the last moment as you pondered on Eren's words. Using them against you seemed to strike a nerve, as when you expected Eren to talk he did no such thing. Instead, he glared at you for being caught out, prompting your next words to follow. "I'll... I'll see you later, Eren,"

And with that, you started walking away.

You did everything in your power to not look back, focusing your gaze on the exit that was a little way ahead. Eren's stare etched itself into your back on the way out, leaving an even deeper wound than before which would probably scar for sure. Your footsteps dragged across the floor like you hauled twice your body weight behind you. Walking upstairs had never been such a demanding challenge before in your life. To think that you possessed the energy to traverse the walls but absolutely none to conquer thirteen mediocre steps.

You made it around ten steps up, just about to reach out for the door handle - when Eren's voice finally filled the room again. It brought your rushed exit to a halt with ease, much to your dismay, and what he had to say did nothing to help your situation.

"Who's to say I ever lied?"

Your heart both soared and sank at the same time, the conflict in your head skyrocketing as your thoughts drove you mad. What did Eren mean by that? Lie about what exactly? It was the way his words were always so devoid of clarity that hurt the most. The brunette was exceedingly blunt yet always left you inquiring more, prying further until it was too late. A mind game that pulled you in and kept you playing. You admittedly almost swayed.

But so close to the door, your hand wavering in the air just begging to open it - it was enough to prevent such a thing a happening. You knew if you headed back it would be the end, you would somehow get more hurt than you already had. It was a risky move you didn't want to place your bets on, you had come too far to be foolish.

So taking a deep breath you reached out for the handle and gripped it tight. You turned the knob and braced yourself to leave, blocking Eren from your mind as you lifted your foot to the eleventh step. Then the twelfth. Then the thirteenth, and finally onto the floor above the jail cells.

Closing that door behind you felt like the freshest of cleanses, your body sighing out in relief when it clicked shut.

Sadly though, you didn't have time to celebrate. The whole encounter surely caught up with you, as did the tears you had been saving for when you were finally alone. Just like they guaranteed, the hot, salty liquid singed the corners of your eyes and the tears returned. Before you could do anything, a cry broke out and you staggered until your back hit the door. The hinges jolted loudly, most likely attracting the attention of someone nearby. Whether it be a guard around the corner or one of your friends in search of your location. Maybe even Hange or Levi coming to check up on you. Whichever it was, they were in for a shock.

Your heart raced with anxiety, mind and body overwhelmed by inner turmoil that made you sick to your gut. The nausea was so bad you had to hold your stomach with your spare arm, fighting the urge to violently vomit all whilst controlling your reckless sobs that didn't cease their slander. Your vision went blurry from how much you broke down, unable to blink the tears away no matter your efforts.

Fearing the unknown had always been a part of who you were. But had somewhat simmered down as you grew older and developed mentally through being a soldier. However, all that progress reversed in an instant as your mind flashed back to the thought of Eren. How someone who used to possess so much passion now resorted to an empty vessel. The way he admitted to your insignificance with such little struggle, only to proceed to confuse you even more by implying he had never told a single lie. Was he even talking about you when he said that? Or something else completely unrelated?

A little bit of confirmation wouldn't hurt anybody.

It was odd to have Eren be the reason for your tears after so many years of him typically being the one to dry them off your face. Though thinking about it, he had been the leading cause for a lot of things as of late. The number a very concerning amount indeed. You barely even recognised him anymore. The once caring soul you fell in love with was no longer there, replaced with a man who had discovered the bittersweet lust for power based on a corrupted idealogy. Such a ruthless lust that it no longer mattered how that idealogy came to be, just as long as he managed to taste an essence of it.

You hated it. You hated that of all people it was Eren who tumbled down that drain. How did you allow yourself to fall in love with someone so possible of committing such atrocities? To worship him and give him everything you had, only to be told it was all for nothing and you were fighting a losing battle. You knew it was hopeless to hold on and believe that your Eren might return but at this rate that seemed unattainable. Not after witnessing him firsthand. The only thing left now was to move on and pray the world was on your side.

Part of you didn't want to move on though, so familiar with Eren as your crutch that a world without him sounded terrifying. You had grown so used to his presence in your life that all of this still felt so surreal no matter the fact you were very much living in it. Living in an endless hell that never allowed anyone a moment's peace. Not you. Not even Eren. Not a single human being on the planet. Nobody.

Just... where along the line had it all gone so painfully wrong?