#anyway go watch mythbusters its very good

[muppetsnoopy]

i.am normal in both thoughts and feelings

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 311: Hand Gun

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “thinkin’ about dropping in some woke analogies of the very real and very presently relevant issue of racial profiling idk what do you guys think” and then shrugged and did it without waiting for an answer, and ngl it was a bit sudden, but I’m here for it. All Might was all “DEKU YOU NEED TO EAT” and Deku was all “OKAY” and took his hero bento and went to go stand dramatically on a tower in the rain whilst having some highly anticipated Vestige flashbacks. OFA II was all, “sup, I guess I’m not Kacchan... OR AM I,” and ngl I think he is?? Alternate universes anybody?? Hello??? But anyway, so OFA the First a.k.a. Yoichi was all “remember that time you guys rescued me from my evil brother and Two took my hand and we Had A Moment?”, and Two and Three were all “ahh yeah good times”, and it was very nice and very, very gay. The chapter ended with it being very unclear if Two and Three have actually lent their power to Deku yet or not lmao. Y’all need to get your shit together dudes.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “what if I gave a random bad guy a fucking tommy gun that shoots nails” and jesus christ calm down son. The Hawksquad, a.k.a. SQUAWK as per @hotchocolatier​, are all “time to drive aimlessly around town acting like Deku has a restraining order on us because that’s literally the best plan to combat the League we could come up with,” and I have no further comment. Hawks is all “idk about you guys but I want to know more about AFO and Tomura’s whole deal” and I can’t remember the last time I identified so strongly with one of these characters. All Might is all, “[EXPLODES???]”, and the chapter ends with that mysterious hot girl from the Tartarus breakout being all “HELLO I CAN TURN INTO A GUN AND I LITERALLY DON’T GIVE A FUCK” and (1) WOW, and (2) IT’S TRUE, SHE CAN, AND SHE REALLY DOESN’T. GODDAMN.

(ETA: so this wholly escaped my notice on the first go, and also has nothing to do with the chapter itself, but I only just realized that this chapter was scanlated by a new group, TCB Scans. they actually did a very good job, and I’m curious if they’ve found a new RAW provider, because the quality this week is actually crazy good in comparison to what we’ve been dealing with for the past few months. I’m gonna have to get caught up on what exactly happened here lol.)

so what will it be this week? more Vestige antics? more of Sad Nomad Deku standing on buildings and pretending like he’s some cool aloof antihero, as if he could fool us when we all know his hero backpack is secretly stuffed full with his nerd diaries and the remnants of all the hero bentos that All Might keeps giving him?? or, just putting it out there, just a crazy thought, but you don’t suppose we might actually cut back to U.A.? mmm. side-eyes emoji

maaaaaan I’m starting to get tired of this trend of beginning chapters by dropping in on random power-tripping civilians and/or Shindou lol. just once can we get a chapter that opens with someone I actually give a fuck about

oh at least Endeavor is here

A WHAT SUPPORT ITEM!??! HOLY SHIT DDLKJSLFKJL

lol somehow that’s more terrifying than bullets for me?? like I’m fully aware that bullets will fuck you up way worse and that in real life nail guns probably don’t work like this AT ALL and only have a range of like... hold up let me just google... up to 100 to 150 m/s and distances of up to 500m wait WHAT

okay wait. hold up. like I was expecting google to tell me nail guns only shoot a few feet at most, and instead the first search result is some CDC blog article that’s “dispelling” the “””myth””” -- please note my repeated sarcastic quotation marks -- that nail guns can fire 1400 feet per second, by explaining that actually they can fire anywhere from 315 ft/sec to 1,295 ft/sec, and that “it is in the pneumatic nail gun user’s best interest to handle these tools as if they were a firearm despite having a lower velocity” dlkjdslkjflkl

SO THAT SCENE IN IRON MAN 3 WHERE TONY RAIDS A HOME DEPOT AND BUYS A BUNCH OF RANDOM TOOLS AND SHIT AND GOES ON TO STAGE A ONE-MAN INVASION OF AN INTERNATIONAL TERRORIST’S FLORIDA MANSION HQ IS ACTUALLY TRUE. YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT THE FILM “HOME ALONE” IS ACTUALLY A DOCUMENTARY. “the Discovery Channel television program “Mythbusters” compared the penetration capacity of an airborne projectile shot from a pneumatic framing nail gun to that of a 9mm hand gun” HELLO YES AND A MERRY “WHAT THE FUCK” TO YOU AS WELL

anyway, so. there’s apparently a reason why the Number One hero, who can burn people with the intensity of a sun going supernova, is hiding here behind this concrete support column making frowny faces. nope. nuh uh. he ain’t about that. I don’t blame you buddy

so now he’s barrel rolling out of his hiding place and setting this dude THE FUCK ON FIRE because HELL NO. BAD ENOUGH I HAD TO WATCH THAT FUCKING MUSHROOM EPISODE LAST WEEK! YOU TAKE THAT SHIT SOMEWHERE ELSE

LOL look at his face

I know the context is actually him being all “I know I’m responsible for basically everything that happened and so that’s why I’m so grim and serious about this mission to set things right piece by piece,” but in my mind this pissed-off face is 100% all because this dude tried to shoot his eye out with a nail gun. look at that. you made him go full flame face again. beard and all. protecting his face so that it can hopefully melt any stray nails that get too close. nope nope nope

good lord. so what’s up next. let me guess the guy fighting Best Jeanist has like an atomic chainsaw or some shit

lol nope we’re just cutting back to Hawks and Jeanist chilling in the Jesla after they’ve wrapped things up

Jeanist has got some serious Groot energy you guys jesus christ he’s like 12 feet tall

oh snap someone threw a pipe at him now

today is just the chapter of Endeavor being assaulted by random DIY tools I guess

I mean, I get why they’re pissed at him obviously; I would be too lol. but tbh I also don’t really understand the “get out of here we don’t want your help” attitude that all of these people suddenly seem to have?? like it if were me, I would be fucking DEMANDING for him and the other heroes to be working round the clock to fix their stupid mess. I mean who else is gonna do it?? it’s their mess, I sure don’t want to be the one to clean it up instead. anyways but whatever lol

oh shit?

so they haven’t dropped the whole “OFA secret potentially gets revealed to the world” thing yet after all. that makes sense I suppose, it did seem like that whole thing wound up playing out a bit too easily

anyway so yeah

the locals are definitely none too happy. well at least Dabi’s got something to be cheerful about I guess

so now we’re cutting to the interior of the Jesla and they’re chitchatting about the current investigation

oh wow this actually makes a bit of sense now. so there was a reason they were keeping their distance from Deku

please note that even in this abstract Endeavor’s-Mental-Image-Of-Him panel, Deku’s eyes still don’t have the light in them anymore :( my poor son

also ftr I still think using Deku as bait in this particular sense is the shittiest idea ever ngl. like sure, let’s let the sixteen-year-old run around battling miscellaneous escaped prison convicts while we stay several kilometers away ON PURPOSE despite the fact that you’re using him as bait to draw out the Big Bad, who just a reminder can destroy anything with a mere touch and who you were all basically helpless against. what exactly are you all planning to do if Tomura or one of the other League VIPs actually shows up to retrieve him?? are you even keeping tabs on him at all in real time?? jesus

(ETA: well that escalated quickly lol.)

Horikoshi is all of a sudden dropping whole pages of exposition here and I can’t be bothered to summarize this lol so just,

a big fat YES to what Jeanist said, though. that’s why imo they would have been better off laying a trap at U.A. rather than just wandering around out in the open. I assume they’re trying to cut their potential losses because U.A. is full of students (and civilians), but those students also happen to be more capable than pretty much anyone else in the manga at this point. and tbh they’re already in life-threatening danger regardless of how things play out from here on, so they might as well at least try to use the few advantages they have right now. U.A. is almost certainly going to come under siege at some point anyway, so they might as well prepare for it

lol I don’t think I’m explaining this very well because I don’t have the patience right now to break it down point by point like it really ought to be, so for now I’ll just say that imo “U.A. siege” stands a good chance of being the eventual endgame even now, and so this whole “Deku runs around being bait” arc is really just killing time until then lol. like and subscribe for more rambling nonsensical takes such as this. maybe next time I’ll even put it all into one single sentence for maximum meandering senior citizen rant value

well it’s nice that they’re finally talking about all of this I guess

we readers have known all of this for months now but this confirms the heroes are finally caught up. ALSO, Hawks is so fucking smart, as always. kinda wonder if things would have played out differently if All Might had let him in on the secret a bit earlier. probably that’s why Horikoshi made damn sure they didn’t find out until after the War arc lol

OH MY GOD YOOOOOO HAWKS OUT HERE ASKING THE REAL QUESTIONS

“anyone else wondering why AFO bothered to raise Tomura as his fake heir for fifteen years when he was secretly planning on taking over his body the whole time” YES, [raises hand] lmao Hawks where the hell were you when I was debating this “AFO is the final villain and Tomura is just his pawn” thing on multiple occasions over the past several years lol

lmao seeing them debate the metaphysics of OFA and all of its mystical bullshit is seriously surreal you guys

JEANIST HAVE YOU CHECKED OUT MY META TAG I HAVE WRITTEN SO MANY ESSAYS. I ACTUALLY WAS PLANNING ON WRITING ANOTHER ESSAY ABOUT THE THING THAT I’M PRETTY SURE HAWKS IS ABOUT TO BRING UP, BUT I NEVER GOT AROUND TO IT WHOOPS, BUT MAYBE I WILL NOW LOL LET’S SEE HOW IT GOES

yes!!

WHICH AFO FUCKING ENSURED HE WOULD BE BY LITERALLY PLANNING OUT EVERY LAST DETAIL OF HIS FAMILY TRAGEDY, FROM SECRETLY GIVING TENKO THE QUIRK TO MAKING SURE NO CIVILIANS OR HEROES WOULD HELP HIM UNTIL AFO FINALLY STEPPED IN. I’M 1000% CONVINCED THIS IS THE CASE YOU GUYS. NOT JUST BECAUSE I’M NOT A FAN OF “THE WORLD IS A FUNDAMENTALLY SHITTY PLACE, ACTUALLY” TAKES BECAUSE MISTER ROGERS TOLD ME TO ALWAYS LOOK FOR THE HELPERS, BUT ALSO BECAUSE IT LITERALLY JUST DOESN’T MAKE A LICK OF SENSE OTHERWISE. THEIR ENTIRE HOUSE CAVED IN FFS, YOU’RE TELLING ME NONE OF THE NEIGHBORS FUCKING OVERHEARD THAT SHIT AND WENT “UMMMMMMMMM” AND WENT TO SEE WHAT WAS GOING ON?? “DIDN’T THERE USED TO BE A HOUSE HERE, AND LIKE A WHOLE FAMILY, AND SHIT?”

LIKE I’M SORRY, BUT IT’S ONE THING TO SAY IT’S REALISTIC THAT NOT A SINGLE PERSON WOULD ATTEMPT TO HELP THE WANDERING TRAUMATIZED CHILD AFTERWARDS (WHICH I DISAGREE WITH AS WELL BUT AT LEAST THAT’S MORE SUBJECTIVE), AND IT’S A WHOLE OTHER THING TO ARGUE THAT IT’S REALISTIC THAT NO ONE WOULD BE FUCKING NOSY. LIKE THAT’S A WHOLE DIFFERENT LEVEL OF “THAT’S NOT HOW ANY OF THIS WORKS” ENTIRELY LOL. anyway tl;dr AFO is a piece of shit and Tomura’s entire worldview is based on a magnificently intricate and savagely cruel lie more at 11

anyway so after all that ranting it looks like that wasn’t even what Hawks was talking about after all lol. I just went off for absolutely no reason lol oh well. instead it seems that Hawks is suggesting that Tomura’s carefully cultivated hatred might not yet have actually reached “can defeat OFA” levels even after all of that trauma. interesting!

don’t mind me, I’m just sitting here while my brain furiously scrambles to put together all the parallels between Hawks and Tomura that it never noticed before until exactly this second. like I’m not even sure that was the intent here at all (I need to check out another translation or two lol), but regardless my mind decided that now would be the perfect time to make the connection between these two twenty-somethings who both had horrific childhoods and spent years being molded by their respective manipulative guardians, and developed eerily similar “laugh at everything because what else can you do” coping mechanisms to deal with it all hmmmmm

anyway so they were talking more about their strategy, but now all of a sudden Jeanist’s phone is beeping??

AND NOW WE’RE CUTTING AWAY TO ALL MIGHT AND HIS MIGHTMOBILE DAMMIT so that means the call to Jeanist was actually something important then!! WAS IT BAKUGOU OMG. DOES YOUR INTERN WANT A WORD FFFKLFSJK please it’s been so long I just need a little crumb or two to tide me over lmao have mercy

anyway so All Might’s following the GPS tracking device he’s apparently got planted on Deku (which in my conspiracy headcanons he’s actually had for a long time now, like since before DvK2 lol because HOW ELSE WOULD HAVE HAVE KNOWN THAT THEY WERE FIGHTING EACH OTHER IN GROUND BETA, PEOPLE) and thinking angsty thoughts about Deku’s sucky life

AND NOW ALL MIGHT’S PHONE IS RINGING TOO?? BAKUGOU HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE YOU CALLING. “WHERE ARE YOU HIDING THE NERD GODDAMMIT”

OMG

lol is he under attack or is he just finally giving All Might the slip like we all know he SECRETLY PLANNED TO ALL ALONG oh my poor dumb angstmuffin

OMG AHHHHHHH WHAT

DID ALL MIGHT JUST FUCKING DIE LMAO NO OF COURSE NOT, BUT WHAT

WHAT IS HAPPENING OMG

THE FUCK IS THAT. AT LEAST IT’S NOT A NAIL

OH IT’S A SPEAKER!! OMG DID THEY TAKE ALL MIGHT HOSTAGE

“THEY’RE HERE” WELP, TIME TO SEE JUST HOW SHITTY THIS SHITTY PLAN REALLY IS LOL

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SHE!!!!

omg. AND OVERHAUL JUST CHILLING THERE IN THE BACKGROUND ALL “WHAT DO YOU EVEN WANT ME TO DO I’VE GOT NO FUCKING ARMS” YEAH GOOD RIDDANCE LOL

DOES THIS GIRL HAVE ONE GIANT LEG OR WHAT, LIKE WHAT’S THE DEAL HERE

-- HOLD UP WAIT, THE GUN IS HER ARM, HOLY SHIT SHE CAN TURN INTO A GUN -- OKAY HOLD UP BECAUSE I NEED TO SAY THAT IN BIGGER TEXT BECAUSE !!!!

YOU GUYS, THE COOL TARTARUS GIRL IS BACK AND HER QUIRK IS “CAN TURN INTO A FUCKING GUN.” THIS IS NOT A DRILL!! MY BEST GIRL MT. GUN IS FINALLY BACK ON THE SCENE WITH HER QUIRK “CAN DO ANYTHING A GUN CAN DO.” “I HEARD Y’ALL WENT AND NAMED ONE OF YOUR HEROES ‘GUNHEAD’ EVEN THOUGH HIS HEAD ISN’T EVEN A GUN, LIKE WTF IS UP WITH THAT LET ME SHOW YOU HOW IT’S DONE” DANG OKAY

lmao only fifteen pages this week, and STILL NO KACCHAN (THEN WHO WAS PHONE!!!), but man I don’t even care because finally we’ve got a cliffhanger that’s actually deserving of being a cliffhanger! hot dog. okay then

[curious-menace]

Can you do headcanons of any Riddler getting cared for and gentle kisses from reader after getting beat up? He needs some loves.

SO I MAY HAVE SUGGESTED THAT MY ULTIMATE FANTASY IS TO GIVE RIDDLER A HUG WITH BACKRUBS AS HE TELLS ME ABOUT HIS DAY AND I STAND BY THAT WHOLE-HEARTEDLY .

i freaking love this stuff so im going to do all of them mwahahah

post asswoop riddlers getting loves

Arkham riddler

He’s VERY quiet, which knowing him and his inability to stop talking, is  bad news.

I paint arkham riddler as a cry baby and i stand by that. this is the hill i will die on. He’ll have dragged his sorry ass into your apartment or house , dripping blood on your floors but he wont bother calling for you. he’ll just sit at the table with his head in his hands having a lil pity party until you find him.

when you do finally get home, he’ll be looking like a kicked puppy. he’s gotten stuck in his own head, mentally beating himself up even more. he got a fright when you came in because he was so caught up he didn't even hear you at the door.

He’s literally sits there like a child with his arms up for you to come scoop him up. he’s not even sure why his first thought after getting beat up was to come here, he’s probably lead the cops here or something and that was so stupid and- you should probably give him a lil soft smooch on the head to stop him before he goes into a spiral.

he needs more emotional and mental care than physical. Talk to him while you're patching him up. any topic, it doesn't matter just keep him focused on your voice and not the one in his head calling him dumb.

he wont admit he wants to be held and coddled after something like this. get your softest blankie and 2 mugs of coco with marshmallows and just ramble at him. tell him about your day or ask him to explain something boring and complicated so he’s focusing on that rather than how upset he is. let him sit on your lap or between your legs on the sofa and watch how its made or mythbusters or something until he falls asleep. he should be ok again in the morning, he doesnt stay down for long. 

Blacklight Riddler

He’s used to getting his ass kicked, either by batman, the other rogues or once he’s a PI, by unhappy clients and the people he put away. He might be tiny but he’s pretty tough. 

even if he’s really hurting, his probably trying to crack jokes and tell blood and bruise related riddles. He doesn't like to see you worry so even if he’s in a lot of pain or a bit upset about things, he’s trying to make you smile.

he likes kisses on his bruises. even if he just banged his hand on the table he’ll come to you because he wants you to kiss it better. 

He’s a decent fighter, unlike a lot of riddlers who couldnt fight their way out of a paper bag. He can throw punches but he lacks in defence and with his bad knee, dodging can be a little hard. even if he wins the fight he’s still likely to need you to patch him up.

He likes kids plasters. like hello kitty and spongebob. no im not joking, he ALWAYS wanted them when he was little and his parents always said no. now he’s an adult he’s going to use them whenever he damn well pleases.

 if it was a particularly bad one, he’ll be ok in the moment even if he has to go to hospital. But he’s going to drop the facade at some point and let you see how upset he is. winding up in hospital after being beat was a common occurrence in childhood. even after doing it time and time again as an adult it doesn't make it any easier on him. he’ll want to stay in your bed, be close to you for few days until either he starts to heal or something snaps him out of his funk.

BTAS Riddler

he really prefers other people to do the fighting for him. well physically anyway. he can handle his own arguments...most of the time. He’s going to need you to nurse a bruised ego more than anything. he probably got dunked on my batman or crane and now he’s huffing.

i don't know if this counts as care and kisses but he clearly needs you around to keep his sorry ass alive. he hurt his side in a fight once and said he wasn't hurt. believable... until he started to act a little confused, a little dizzy. needless to say it worried you enough to take him to emergency care. 

He was obviously in agony by now but he was still fighting with you the entire drive there, insulting you and insisting he was fine. its a good job you took him when he did, turns out he’d ruptured his spleen and would probably be dead if you weren’t around to act like his common sense.

he still hasnt apologised for that. or any of the other times you insisted on medical care to stop him from pushing up daisies. he just pretends like you know he’s grateful so he doenst have to admit he’s bullheaded, stubborn and worst of all, wrong. 

if he has been seriously hurt, he acts more indignant about it than anything. he wants to be waited on and pampered while resting in bed. he can be a genuine pain to deal with, talking about how lucky you are to see him in such a vulnerable state and how you should be grateful he’s letting you do this for him.

He doesn't want to admit how much he actually needs you. his goons wont put up with him when he’s like this and he’s freaking paying them to do it. you do it for free and no matter how annoying he is you havent left him yet. he doesn't tell you but youve noticed he starts getting you more gifts about a week after he’s recovered. like its taken him a day or two to work out he should probably thank you for all you do.

Original Riddler

this riddler is just weird. like he gets a freaking hang nail and he pretends like he’s dying. but he could nearly lose a limb and he’ll say “tis but a scratch” and still try to hobble about like nothing is wrong.

actually he’s more like olaf “oh look i've been impaled.”. he probably tries to laugh off life threatening injuries like its nothing, taking maybe 3 steps before he collapses on his face in a blood puddle and lets out a tiny “help”

good luck moving his tall lanky ass around. better get a gurney and maybe those vets at the zoo who deal with giraffes. seriously if you want to take care of him you are going to need help or some sort of action plan and a go bag because with his limp butt this will not be easy.

he’s kinda like BTAS riddler in that he needs you to tell him the injury is serious. hes not dumb he just has a high pain threshold and genuinely doesn't realise that injuries are as bad as they are. 

he can be a bit of a baby while being patched up. he doesn't like a lot of blood or gore, it makes him feel a little sicky. better give him your phone to play with like a kid at the doctors or put the tv on for him to watch while you bandage  him. word of warning, he will pass out or throw up if you try to give him stitches.

i think you should focus your love and attention on him AFTER medical care. just focus on the job, be silent and as fast as possible to get it over with quickly. you should probably bring him something sweet too. no not just you, although you are sweet for looking after him. give him something sugary because he’s going to be light headed after seeing any blood. maybe you could give him a lolly for being a good patient. 

Telltale riddler

this riddler is essentially a metahuman. he can REALLY take a beating and bounce back fairly quickly. just look how many times batman punched him in the face and it barely stunned him! he doesnt usually need patched up after a fight. maybe just a lil smooch and some hugs

he did really need your help after the whole pact thing. having his friends abandon him hurt like hell, more than any physical injury ever could.

after that, he clings to you. almost obsessively so; we know he’s got some serious mental illnesses but he usually has the worst of it under control, even without meds. now? it seems like he’s experiencing ptsd and is afraid to go anywhere without you, like you might up and disappear if you arent in his line of sight at all times.

i think this riddler might need the most intense care from you. hugs and gentle reassurance wont be enough. you’re going to be responsible for taking him to therapy, keeping him taking his meds and grounding him to reality. this is the kind of responsibility you took on when you got involved with him but i doubt you realised how hard it would be. i cant promise it will all be worth it but i can promise he wont ever forget your kindness.

the kind of care he needs after such a hard knocking down is just stability. im not one for romance or any mushy gushy stuff but please just pour your love into the cracks in this poor mans soul.

its hard going, but he has his moments. his gallows sense of humor is still there and hey, after him being in and out and gone for so long, it might be nice to have him around more.  

Zero year riddler

INSUFFERABLE LITTLE SHIT THIS ONE. he could LITERALLY be bleeding out in your arms and he’d STILL be backseat driving on your medical skills. the temptation to just leave him there to bleed is INCREDIBLE.

he’ll drop the act eventually. he’ll ask and maybe even beg for your help. man has  no shame and all the self preservation instincts of a lemming. dont get me wrong, he can be a total coward some times, only looking out for himself . but when he’s actually hurt ? not a fuckin clue. does this head wound need an ice pack or heat pack? is this spurring blood wound worthy of medical care? no idea. he was a very sheltered child who never got so much as a bruise so he has no idea what to do when he’s hurt.

he gets the everloving shit kicked out of him on a clockwork basis. like you could hear knocking on your door at 3 am and already be at the table with a first aid kit like oh its tuesday riddler must have broken his nose.

he takes entirely too much joy in making you patch him up. youre starting to wonder if he’s doing it on purpose just to see you in your little apron and latex gloves . he’s getting off on this and you know it but god help you, you just  cant resist his dumb face asking for your help and would you also wear this pink nurses outfit while youre at it?

one time he lost a LOT of blood. he would be fine but he was pretty damn loopy from lightheadedness. while you were trying to get him into bed to rest he started flirting with you. can you believe the audacity? he’s lost 3 pints of blood and he’s still more focus on his libido? 

he’s actually going to be both humble and grateful for your help when he finally comes round. dont get me wrong, he’s still a bit of a prick but at least he says thank you for saving him before he demands you kiss all his booboos and ouchies. 

nonnie i am having a stroke. i was trying SO hard to just pick one but i COULDNT because i am WEAK for hurt and comfort.

theres a reason i have a tag that literally says “i have naughty hands and no self control”

someone needs to stage an intervention

got something you wana talk about? send me an ask or a dm! im always game to talk about our favorite curious menace 💚💜

[perregrinstudiessometimes]

i was tagged by @pinkvetstudies

1. Are you staying home from work/school? Yes, the school has been closed for over a moth now and its finals week 

2. If you’re staying home, who’s there with you? My grandparents, my aunt and me

3. Do you have pets to keep you company? so many pets. We have 6 dogs atm. but my mother lives next door so i have been visiting her two dogs and two cats 

4. Who do you miss the most? My friends fo sure. i can’t wait to have them all over for a party when this is all done. 

5. When was the last time you left your home? Yesterday,I walk the dogs 2-3 times a week. 

6. What was the last thing you bought? An Iphone since my last phone broke 

7. Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed? It has been hard being stuck with my conservative family but i have been video chatting with my friends a lot to keep me sane. 

8. Are you a homebody? Absolutely

9. What movies have you watched recently? haven’t been watching a tone of movies but i have been watching everything is going to be okay and mythbusters jr.

10. An event that you are looking forward to that got canceled? i was supposed to see a live showing of whose line is it anyway which has been postponed indefinitely 

11. What’s the worst thing that you’ve cancelled? i had big plans to go to new york to see beetlejuice the musical live but we have had to cancel the trip. 

12. What’s the best thing you’ve had to cancel? Nothing really i mean one of my exams got canceled guess that is good  

13. Do you have any new hobbies? not realy i have picked up playing imessage games with my friend since we cant host game nights 

14. What are you out of? weirdly copy paper, dont know why but the store is out and so am i 

15. What music are you listening to? all of it but mostly the beetlejuice soundtrack lol

15. What shows are you watching? as i said before mythbusters jr and everything is going to be okay and that’s it haven’t been watching a ton of stuff. 

16. What are you reading? Nothing anymore just finished all my school books so i need to buy some new books

17. What are you doing for self care? video chatting my friends and paining my nails

18. Are you exercising? kinda, i relay only exercise when i walk my dogs if that counts 

19. How’s your toilet paper supply? we are all set lol wes scared for a while when we got down to our last two rolls in the house but we were eventually able to get some 

20. Have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine? no but i very much want to my friends keep talking me out of it because i would probably mess it up if i did anything myself. 

i would like to tag you! yes you reading this! and also @myhoneststudyblr @its-anotherstudent-blr and @educatedlatina feel free to ignore the tag if you have already taken apart or if this is not your thing 

[arcadefloorvibes]

I know this is a lot and u dont have to do all of them but im interested: 3. 7. 13. 18. 21. 25. 34. 44. 46. 55. 57. 58. 69. 71. 76. 86. 97. 99.

It's perfectly fine to send me a lot, I love doing these!

3. What color are your eyes?

They're mainly grey but they change depending on the weather which is really weird. Example. Sunny day deep full grey, cloudy day grey with colored flecks. I got fully blue one day and that was awesome

7. What color is your hair?

I haven't seen my natural hair color since September, so I'm going off my eyebrow color and saying dark brown but at the moment my hair is a really nice turquoise color!

13. Any sibling?

Yep, three.

That's right, 3.

They're all my younger brothers and I'm really good friends with one who I've mentioned enough times that he has a code name, Kevin. (Which I find hilarious because that's the name he said he hates the most) he's mentioned in my plotagon animation on youtube (I'm ilovemazerunnerohandbooks if you want to check it out)

They're 13, *struggles to remember* Kevin is nine(?) and eight

Kevin is also a massive airhead and I wonder some days if he's deaf

18. Favourite tv show?

Aaaaaaah I don't have a favourite one so I'll say my favourites

Miraculous Ladybug (haven't seen season 3 because my brothers say I have to wait for them)

Nowhere boys (again can't watch because I have to wait for them)

Vs Arashi (a Japanese show that is hilarious and awesome)

And Mythbusters because making a machine to see if popcorn can make a house explode is entertaining

21. Sandals or sneakers?

Sneakers

I will only wear sandals if its a party or something

25. What color socks are you wearing?

I'm in bed currently but earlier today I was wearing socks with George Washington's face on them (heh George WASHinton because you wash your socks... I think it's funny)

34. Favourite actress

I've never actually thought of this, ooh, um Emma Watson

I like her and she's the only one that I could watch hours of interviews and things from (or Kaya Scoldalario (hope that's spelt right))

Good question though

44. What's your biggest fear?

The one I tell everyone is spiders because the bastards are everywhere and I hate them but my biggest fear is disappointing people

It's an inconvenient fear

If anyone says they belive I can do something I will push myself to do the thing so I don't disappoint them

I think the fear comes from when I was younger and did something bad my parents wouldn't get angry they would just say they were disappointed in me and that was worse that getting in trouble

46. What's your go to hair style?

My hair is short so I keep it with a fringe and as flat as I can possible get it because it bounces back anyway

55. What is your dream job?

Honestly I'm still working on that one, but I'm thinking a librarian

I get to be in my favourite place, the people who go there are like me, bookworms and nerds, sort books by alphabetical order and get paid for it and I constantly get book recommendations

Best job ever

57. Do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

Never been to a hotel so I wouldn't know but my grandparents do and they give me the nice smelling ones

58. Do you have freckles?

No I don't, but my eight year old brother does and I'm jealous

69. Do you play an instrument?

Kind of. I took cornet classes and joined a band for a month then stopped and I can kind of read piano sheet music and play with my right and left hand but not at the same time

71. Tea or coffee?

I like tea and I'll gladly have some tea with my sugar but if I'm told I can't have something I want it more I'll choose coffee

Caramel mocha is the best thing I have ever had

76. What color looks best on you?

Black, dark purple or dark red really vampy colors

Because of the blue hair, anything that contrasts with that is really good and I enjoy dark vampiric colors

Also I wear nothing but these colors so I don't know.

86. What is your phone background?

At the moment it's default because my parents help me with my business on my phone and I dont want them to see what I have but I have my ideal photo

Sebastian Michaelis looking freaking adorable

Seriously I'm obsessed with Black Butler at the moment to the point where I've designed a Sebastian Sim

You know shit is real when you're making sims

97. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

Dark chocolate with nuts is super good but milk works with everything so I'll go with that

And the final one 99. What is your zodiac sign?

I'm a Leo and from what I've read I am not very Leo at all

Thank you so much for sending me these, i love doing these game!

[broship-addict]

Angst free prompt: Little acts of domestic helpfulness. Like, making the other tea or making sure their favorite fork is clean or something.

idk if you’re even still around anon because this is nearly a year late and deviates a l o t from the original prompt but it was fun to write anyways :) thank you!

on ao3

A fumble with keys, then a rattle as the doorknob turns. While no sound comes from the swing of the door, Neil enters the apartment calling, “Honey, I’m home,” and that makes more of a racket than it would’ve if he’d just slammed it against the adjacent wall.

Andrew, who has long since become used to this particular part of their routine, merely grunts in response. Their mocking attempts to imitate the horrors of heteronormative domesticity is something shared between two men who have finally found themselves settling into a relatively uneventful life, and Andrew cherishes it even if it isn’t worth the breath to say so.

Over the screams of the boring thriller he’s watching, Andrew can hear the clatter of Neil’s keys as they’re dropped into the little dish that the Boyd-Wilds children had made for them, the thud of the door’s latch being put into place, the shuffling of Neil struggling out of his running shoes because he always refuses to undo the laces. He flips through the channels as Neil stumbles into the living room, reeking of and drenched in sweat. His hair is half plastered to his face and half valiantly reaching for the ceiling - courtesy of that goddamned bandanna - and the only thing that Andrew appreciates about this particular image is the fact that Neil’s legs in those tiny short-shorts still look tantalizingly good.

Neil tosses a candy bar his way - a fancy-flavoured KitKat from the Asian corner store three blocks down the street - and he would have missed horribly had Andrew’s reflexes not been as good as they are. Without a racquet Neil’s a useless shot, and Andrew raises a single eyebrow at him judgingly.

“Oh, fuck off,” Neil tells him, grabbing an old Palmetto water bottle from the fridge. “I’m taking a shower.”

“Better clean your mouth while you’re at it,” Andrew says boredly. He pauses long enough on a cooking show to unwrap his bar, but hastily changes it again once the big box of spinach is brought out. At his feet their puppy - a loud and excitable thing that Amelia had somehow managed to convince them to take in - gazes hopefully at the candy.

Andrew takes care to keep it far out of her reach, because he’s not cleaning up dog vomit and he refuses to listen to Neil complain about letting Cerberus eat chocolate.

He’s busy trying to choose between leaving the TV on Mythbusters or switching to Jeopardy when Neil finally comes out of the shower, flushed pink from the heat and scrubbing at his wet hair with a towel so the ends stick up even more. That decides it, Andrew thinks, and sets the remote down. Neil gets bored to death watching game shows.

(He nearly changes his mind when Neil leaves the towel draped over the back of a dining chair, since they both know it irritates him, but in the end all he does is huff in exasperation.)

“Hey,” Neil says, finally coming to stand in front of Andrew. It’s achingly familiar, and Andrew can remember that soft tone from a bus ride nearly two decades ago. Neil likes to say it when he wants Andrew’s attention, as if Andrew is not always, always drawn to Neil the moment he enters a room.

“You’re blocking my view,” Andrew tells him. His mouth is still sweet from the KitKat, the space next to him colder than he’d like.

“Mmm,” agrees Neil. “You do enjoy watching Discovery Channel commercials for glorified dumpster-diving.”

Andrew snaps his fingers at him impatiently. “Of course I do, I have to see your trash ass every day.”

“You like my trash ass,” Neil shoots back, a lazy smile working its way across his face. Andrew glares at him and very pointedly does not let his gaze drift down, to where Neil’s trash ass is being hugged by his sleep shorts.

And at last Neil caves in, crawling into Andrew’s space and turning towards him like a flower to the sun. It still makes Andrew’s stomach feel hot, as if countless fusion explosions are going off there and all he can think is that Neil’s hair smells like the vanilla bean shampoo Andrew had bought for him during his last ice cream run. His fingers tangle themselves into the loose fabric of Neil’s shirt - actually, it might be Andrew’s - and he can’t bring himself to focus on the show as it resumes.

“Now you’re just being distracting,” he mutters, leaning in so his nose is buried in the crook of Neil’s neck. With his glasses laying on their bedside table, he doesn’t have to worry about Neil’s hair getting caught in the frames. It also means that he has to squint in order to see the shit-eating grin Cerberus gives him as she jumps onto the couch cushions, where she knows Neil wouldn’t have the heart to let him shove her off.

And maybe in any other moment Andrew might be inclined to prove her wrong, but Neil is tugging him up for a kiss and he doesn’t mind enough to pick this particular fight. He doesn’t care either, especially with Neil’s lips sliding languidly across his own and their bodies pressed together along their sides. One of Neil’s hands slips under Andrew’s shirt to skim over the pudge of his stomach, and the coolness of a metal band most definitely does not make him purr into Neil’s mouth. The hand stays even when they break away, Cerberus whining loudly about the lack of attention doled out on her.

“Aw, baby,” Neil croons, the corner of his mouth curling up as he leans over to boop the tip of Cerberus’ nose. Andrew pretends that his heart hadn’t stuttered in the single second he’d thought Neil was talking to him.

“I’m not kissing you if you kiss the dog,” Andrew tells him.

A pretty, gasping noise as Neil laughs. He nestles into Andrew’s side, his hand still stroking his stomach as if Andrew was the pet. Cerberus rests her head on the curve of Neil’s hip and for a brief, horribly undignified moment, Andrew wants to be in her place. Instead, he wraps his arm around Neil’s shoulders to pull him closer, no longer awed but no less pleased by how they fit into each other.

They’re quiet for a while, and the only sounds come from the TV and Cerberus’ noisy breathing as she drifts off. Neil’s fingers take to twisting in the trail of hair leading into Andrew’s pants - not tugging enough to hurt - so Andrew retaliates by dipping below Neil’s waistband and brushing the blunt edges of his nails along his ass, light enough to make him shiver. Twenty, even ten years ago they wouldn’t have done this without permission and intent and clear lines, but right in this moment they’re content to trust each other.

“You know,” Neil whispers, once the next commercial break starts. “I think I’m getting old.”

“Really,” says Andrew drily. “What makes you think that?”

There’s a pause, a sigh, and then, “I never thought I’d ever get the chance to be old.”

Andrew pulls out his hand so they’re doing something that can almost be called a cuddle. He likes the awe in Neil’s voice, the steadiness of their breaths, even the background ticking of their cheap clock. Most of all, he likes the way his own mind is turning over the concept, the realization that yes, they’re becoming old and one day they’ll be gross and wrinkly and toothless. They’ve survived and found their reasons for living, even though neither of them had expected to live past their twenties.

Without really meaning to, he pulls Neil’s hand out from under his shirt and traces the simple band absentmindedly. On a whim he brings it up to press a reverent kiss to the metal as Neil hums in contentment. His own ring, usually worn on a chain under his clothes, is lying next to his glasses a room away, because Andrew doesn’t need the familiar weight to remind him of what he has.

“Is there a reason why you brought this up?” Andrew finally asks, carefully threading their fingers together over his lap. Cerberus snorts in her sleep.

“Not really,” Neil says, a hint of a smile only seen because Andrew’s completely given up on watching TV. “My legs were beginning to cramp up so I started thinking about my knees, which were kinda bothering me during my run - I might need to wear a brace next game - then I realized that over the course of the whole day I’ve managed to crack my neck, wrist, knuckles, hip, and ankles. I think my elbow needs to crack, actually, since it’s been feeling weird lately.” He’s quiet for a moment, then continues with, “My back constantly aches and all I can think of is the way we used to make fun of Coach for complaining about all of his joint pain.”

“But you’re still fine,” Andrew guesses, because Neil is still horribly predictable. He doesn’t mention that his own shoulders have been acting up during the past few games, since then Neil would bother him about going to have that checked out. Neil is a fucking hypocrite, he thinks with something that’s close to affection.

“Of course,” Neil says. “I have you. And the Foxes.”

They haven’t been Foxes for years, but Neil’s always been the nostalgic sort. Andrew finds that he’s been becoming more and more nostalgic too, even missing some of his old teammates now that he doesn’t have to see them every day. He doesn’t want to think too hard on it though, and carefully wiggles out from under Neil, who is a lot more draped over him than he thought, and presses a kiss to his forehead.

“I’m making hot chocolate,” he announces. “Want anything?”

“It’s too late for caffeine,” Neil complains, which yes, is completely a sign that he’s becoming old. Andrew, who has gained the Fox kids’ affection by remaining young at heart, finds that the sugar crash outdoes any of the meager caffeine in his hot cocoa mix.

All the same, he pulls Neil’s favourite mug from the drying rack as well, and sends both of them into the microwave full with water. There’s a box of tea bags that help Neil sleep, and Andrew likes the smell. He dumps in more mix than necessary into his own mug while waiting for Neil’s to seep, and comes back to find that his husband has collapsed sideways in his absence.

“Really,” Andrew says dryly. “I’m going to sit on your face.”

“Mmm, maybe when I have more energy,” Neil tells him with a naughty grin, pulling himself back up slowly to avoid waking Cerberus. Andrew hopes in vain that the steam’s blurring out his blush because goddamnit, he’s in his forties and still horribly weak to Neil’s rare hints of dirty talk.

Neil carefully eases Cerberus’ head off him so he’s fully upright, and reaches out to take his mug while Andrew tries to sit without his knees creaking. The sound of explosions and gleeful cheers echo from the speakers around them - Andrew likes the luxury of surround systems and Neil likes the opportunity to shell out money to treat him - and Andrew thinks that this is something worth fighting and surviving for.

He noisily slurps down his hot cocoa and ignores Neil’s little huff of laughter. Their thighs are pressed together even though they’re both careful to keep their elbows from bumping, and outside a car alarm is going off. Before long Andrew’s mug is empty save for the gritty bits of whatever didn’t dissolve, and he sets it down with a soft thud before deciding that it’s Neil’s turn to be leaned against for a change. His fingers run idly along the seams of the couch cushion, and there’s something soothing about the scritching noises his nails make.

“What are you going to do?” Andrew finally asks. The words burst out like he’s been holding them in for years, and maybe he has. “When you retire.”

“Who says I’m retiring?” Neil responds impishly, his smile curving around the lip of his mug. “I could keep playing Exy until I die.”

It’s not funny since Neil has, in fact, nearly died multiple times because of Exy, and Andrew tells him so.

“Fine,” Neil says, maybe a touch shamed. “I could coach. Or volunteer or something.”

Andrew isn’t even surprised. “As long as you’re coaching the same league as Kevin’s Tigers,” he says, just because he likes watching Kevin lose, even by proxy.

Neil hums thoughtfully. “The famous Josten-Day rivalry transcending generations, sounds fun. What about you?”

Without them noticing, Mythbusters had already finished and the channel is switching into something with far fewer explosions. Andrew thinks about the possibilities - they have enough money to comfortably live out the rest of their lives - and about everything that he never thought he’d have. He thinks about foster care and foster homes that were never really homes, about Bee and Wymack and chances that he hadn’t even believed in.

He thinks about the little idea that’s been wiggling around his mind, about Robin and about being able to help fix a broken system in a broken world.

“Volunteer or something,” Andrew eventually says. Neil makes another humming noise, and takes a sip of tea.

“We have time to work it out,” he says, and Andrew likes the way he emphasizes time. After years of countdowns, they’re finally counting up.

Even though it’s chilly outside, the cocoa settles a warmth in Andrew’s stomach and the weight of Neil along his side is better than any blanket. They absently watch whatever’s on - neither of them are paying attention - until Neil’s little sips finally empty his mug.

Their feet bump together when he gets up, and Andrew wordlessly passes him his own mug. He stares a little shamelessly at the strip of skin Neil reveals when he stretches up, and reaches for the remote to turn the TV off. Cerberus is grunting in her sleep, and Andrew considers waking her up before deciding that he doesn’t really care enough about the couch to deal with her trying to sneak into their room. Neil’s still cleaning up the mess Andrew made on the counter  and rinsing out their mugs, so Andrew creeps up behind him and brushes the sides of his arms light enough that he can feel goosebumps form under his fingertips. It’s a sign of how comfortable they’ve become that Neil only relaxes at his touch, and Andrew presses his forehead into the space between Neil’s shoulder blades.

“Bed?” Neil asks.

“Sleep,” Andrew agrees, which does not necessarily mean that they won’t be doing other bed activities later.

“You need to let go of me,” Neil says.

“You need to work harder on arm day,” Andrew says with an emphasizing squeeze, but moves back anyways. Neil turns towards him with a little frown on his face, and Andrew uses his thumb to swipe it away, before tilting Neil’s head down to kiss him.

“Says the man who always skips cardio,” Neil murmurs against his lips as his hands - wet and cold because Andrew’s blocking the towels - come up to gently trace Andrew’s jaw. “C’mon, before we end up having sex in the kitchen. Again.”

It had been a messy affair, and the days when they could stay up past midnight playing Exy are over - Andrew’s eyelids are already feeling heavy. He sighs into their last kiss before pulling away, tugging at the hem of Neil’s shirt - which really is Andrew’s - to lead him into the bedroom.

“Keep your wet hair to your own pillow this time,” Andrew says, climbing in first like always. Neil takes up the other side of the bed, and the rustle of the sheets is actually sort of comforting.

“Hey,” Neil says again, once the blanket’s thrown over them and Andrew’s clammy feet are sucking the warmth from his own. He needs to stop saying it like that, because Andrew’s mind tends to get whisked away to glaring sunlight glinting off auburn hair and a sweet smile on a not-so-sweet day. “We’re getting old. Together, I mean.”

“Aging hasn’t made you any quieter,” Andrew grumbles, and their hands find each other in the darkness.

Other than their breathing, it’s completely silent.

[ookamirinchan]

Top 10 Things I Will/Won’t Miss

Living in a foreign country and culture is routinely both exciting and frustrating. There are many things about Japan that I love--so much so that I wish such things were more common in the west. But on the flip side, no matter how “used to” Japanese daily life I become, there will always be things that are beyond annoying--things that I absolutely will never miss once I leave. As my 10 week countdown begins, I realize I’ve started categorizing all of the things I see in my daily life as one or the other. Will I miss this?

Although most things I question get a “meh, probably,” there are a few things that get a resounding and definite “yes” or “no.” Here are the top 10 things I will miss and the top 10 things I won’t in no particular order.

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Top 10 Things I’m Not Going To Miss Even a Little Bit

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1. Lack of Appliances

One of the biggest frustrations of life in Japan is a lack of what I consider to be necessary appliances. Namely, a dryer, a dishwasher, and an oven. How is one meant to function without such luxuries? I’ve never understood it.

My time in Japan has been spent saving laundry, dishes, and cooking until the last possible minute because doing any of the above without the proper appliance is maddening. I’ve started driving to the coin laundry every week and using only paper utensils and plates because the alternatives are just so aggravating. For a society that’s so “high tech,” it’s amazing how little technology they use in their daily lives.

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2. The Language Barrier

I’ve studied Japanese for going on 7 years now, though I’m still not very good. I can blunder my way through standard conversations on the phone or at the store, but free conversations are still difficult. Add in the fact that I only understand about 50% of what people say to me and that students and many co-workers insist on speaking to me in Japanese as though I am capable of responding and you have my frustration with the language barrier.

I can’t even express to you how happy I will be to be able to read food labels, instructions for my new electronic, or the side-effects and ingredients in my cough medicine.

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3. My Job

Those who know me well know this one already--the number one reason I’m leaving Japan is that I absolutely can’t stand my job as an ALT. It’s boring, it’s frustrating, I have no control over anything I do, I’m treated like a child, and I have no responsibility whatsoever. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone to a class just to say a quick “hello” to the students and then stand in the corner for 50 minutes while the teacher explains grammar in Japanese. Such a waste of my time and skills.

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4. Being “The Gaijin”

Have you ever lived in a foreign country where you were so obviously “the foreigner”? If so, you know where I’m going with this one. Sometimes, being “gaikokujin” (foreign person) in Japan is a good thing. For example, you can get away with just about any social faux pas because you “don’t understand.” There’s even a term for it among foreigners in Japan--Gaijin Smash. And yet, when you walk into a restaurant and the staff automatically assumes you don’t know what you’re doing...when you’re sick and your supervisor has to go to the doctor with you to translate...when you’re treated with “kid gloves” whenever you try to do anything...it gets kind of annoying.

But there’s more to it than that. As a Gaijin, you’re recognizable. Everyone in your city knows who you are and where you work. People you’ve never seen before strike up a conversation with you at the convenience store. People constantly comment on your skin, hair, teeth, clothes, size, and anything else about you that’s different. And children you teach follow you like lost puppies when they see you in the grocery store. (Where are your parents, small child?)

I know some JETs really love this attention, but I really don’t. It’ll be nice to go back to a place where I’m not a town celebrity, thank you very much.

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5. Japanese Netflix

For those of you who don’t know, Netflix is region-locked. So U.S. Netflix is different from Netflix in the U.K. or in Australia or in Japan. Time was, you could use a proxy to trick Netflix into thinking you’re in the U.S. when really you’re not in order to access content in other countries. But Netflix, losers that they are, caught on to this and beefed up their security so much that proxies no longer work and if you live in Japan you have to watch Japanese Netflix.

Now, really, Netflix in Japan isn’t all that different from Netflix in the U.S., but a lot of the titles are different. Oh yeah, and all the anime/movies made in Japan are in Japanese with no subtitles. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read articles online about what Netflix is adding in the coming months, gotten super excited, and then been sad because it’s only American Netflix that got a cool new show or movie. Ugh. I will be plenty happy to return to my “real” Netflix and the shows I actually want to watch.

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6. Sick Culture

When you’re sick in Japan, you follow a very specific routine.

1. Put on a face mask.

2. Take your temperature.

3.A. If you don’t have a fever, you’re completely fine go to work.

3.B. If you do have a fever, you’re dying. You should go to the doctor immediately.

4. Tell the doctor you have a fever.

5. Take the flu test, even if you don’t have flu symptoms.

6.A. If the flu test is positive, go home and sleep for 3 days. Don’t touch another person until your 3 days are up.

6.B. If the flu test is negative, you’re fine. Take your medicine and go to work, it’s probably just stress.

7. Cry because Japanese people have NO CLUE how to be sick.

Now, the face masks are, of course, annoying. They’re uncomfortable and suffocating and MythBusters proved they don’t actually work anyway. But more frustrating than that is (a) the assertion that you must go to the doctor for every little ailment and (b) the assumption that you’re only “sick” if you have a fever (and on the flip side, the assumption that if you have a fever you must be contagious).

For example, last winter I had strep throat. Now, it’s pretty hard to have strep throat and not know you have strep throat. I went to the doctor because that’s what you do when you have strep throat--you have to go get antibiotics. My conversation with the doctor went something like this:

Doctor: “What’s wrong?”

Me: “I think I have strep throat.”

Doctor: “What are your symptoms?”

Me: “Well, I have a high fever, my throat hurts, and there are big white spots on it.”

Doctor: “Have you had a flu shot this year?”

Me: “No...?”

Doctor: “Let’s do a flu test.”

Me: “I don’t have the flu. I don’t even have any symptoms of the flu.”

Doctor: “You have a fever. So we should do a flu test.”

Me: “If you’d just look at my throat, you’d know I don’t have the flu.”

Doctor: “I’ll look at your throat after we do the flu test.”

Me: “Fine.”

(We do the flu test.)

Doctor: “You don’t have the flu.”

Me: “Yes, I know.”

(Doctor finally looks at my throat.)

Doctor: “You probably have strep throat.”

Me: “You don’t say...? Wow, I never would have thought of that.”

Then he proceeds to give me five different medications to cure the strep throat--one is an antibiotic, one is for fever, one is basically a painkiller, one is a Chinese herbal remedy for strep throat, and one is for nausea that I might or might not get from any of the previous medications.

Ugh.

And don’t even get me started on the argument I had with my vice principal, who thought I shouldn’t be able to use my sick leave for strep throat because it wasn’t the flu, even after I explained that (a) it’s super contagious and (b) I kind of can’t talk at all.

Seriously, never get sick in Japan. Just don’t do it.

But on the plus side, you can wear the face masks when you’re not sick for cool benefits:

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7. Narrow Roads

If you’ve ever been to Japan, you know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t...imagine a one-way street in your town. Narrow it by a foot. That’s a 2-way street in the Japanese countryside. If you meet another car along the road, one of you has to pull off the road for the other to pass. Sometimes there isn’t room to pull off. In which case one of you backs up until there is room to pull off.

Then there are the people who (understandably) are tired of people driving over their garden because of narrow roads. Those people erect cement walls around their property. So there’s quite literally nowhere to go. Those people are fun.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve felt like I was going to either destroy my car or die or both because of narrow roads in Japan. I will not miss them.  

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8. Politeness, Part 1

Everyone is so dang polite in Japan. You’d think this would be a good thing, and in some cases it is. I talk about the good aspects of this later, in the things I WILL miss section. But this aspect of Japanese culture definitely has its downsides, too.

Just because Japanese people are polite 98% of the time doesn’t mean they don’t get angry. It just means that (a) you don’t know they’re angry and (b) they’re going to passive-aggressively make your life a living hell while apologizing for it and totally not meaning it.

I am so, so, so tired of people who don’t say what they mean--people who agree with you not because they think it’s a good idea but because they feel like they have to. For example, I once taught a lesson that was absolute crap (and on parents’ day, no less). The students were confused, the JTE was confused, and everything was chaos. After the class, I asked my JTE how he thought the lesson went.

“It was good.” He said.

“Really?” I asked.

“Yes.” He said.

“You didn’t think it was confusing?”

“Yes, it was confusing.”

“You don’t think it was too difficult for the students?”

“Yes, it was difficult.”

Me, internally, “Then why the heck did you tell me it was a good lesson?!?!?!?!?!”

But really, I said, “Okay, so what do you think I could do to make it better?”

“Nothing. It was good.”

Me, internally, “ WTH???????”

But really, I said, “Okay. Thanks for class.”

This kind of exchange is fairly normal--there’s never an explicit yes or no answer. It’s always this convoluted nonsense that you couldn’t possibly understand unless you read their body language.

In another example, I wanted to take 2 days of vacation time so I could go on a trip during Golden Week. I don’t have to ask anyone but the principal, but as a courtesy I asked the head of the English department first. Her response was something along the lines of, “We have a parent’s viewing class that day. So it’s not a good time for you to take off. No one can tell you that you can’t use your vacation time. So you could use it. But we’d be happy if you came to school on that day.”

The implication was a very heavy “No, you can’t take that day off.” But what she actually said was different. You better believe I still took that day off. And, as usual, although no words were exchanged about the matter, there have been a dozen little things over the last few weeks that make me certain she’s punishing me for going against her wishes.

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9. Lack of Cheese (And Other Nummy Foods)

I’ve missed cheese so much. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so much!

Also, bread, cottage cheese, popcorn cakes, Dr. Pepper, and so much more. Words cannot express how much I am looking forward to food upon my return. (Though I am going to miss sushi and Coco’s Curry.)

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10. Culture Shock (But...)

For those who don’t know, culture shock is a big, annoying roller coaster of pain and annoyance. You start off all happy, in your cute little honeymoon phase, and you’re like “Yay, this is going to be fun!” We call that part “Stage 1.”

Then, just when you think life is going to be awesome forever, you hit Stage 2, where suddenly your car bounces off track and everything is miserable. This is the part where you hate everyone and everything that is different from your normal way of life. Except you’re surrounded by things like that and life just pretty much sucks.

Next comes Stage 3 where you sorta-kinda get used to some things and life gets a little bit better. Like realizing that having a bathroom that’s solely a *bath* room is actually a pretty neat idea. And eventually, you have enough of these revelations that you reach Stage 4 where you magically accept your new life and everything is wonderful again.

Except...

Nothing is ever that pretty and perfect. Oh sure, you go from Stages 1 to 2 fairly regularly, but after that is anyone’s guess. My time in Japan has been something like this: 1 - 2 - 2 - 3 - 2 - 2 - 2 - 4 - 4 - 4 - 4 - 2 - 3 - 2 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 4 - 2. And on any given day, I really can’t tell which Stage I’m going to end on. It’s completely unpredictable and insane.

It’ll be nice to go back home where I don’t have to worry about Culture Shock ever again. Right?

Wrong. Because Reverse Culture Shock is totally a thing. A thing which I experienced in part last summer when I returned to the U.S. for a couple weeks.

I can leave my shoes on inside? What?????

I’m given a fork at a Chinese restaurant and have to request chopsticks. What?????

There’s no 5:00 song!

I want to take a real bath. :(  :(  :(  :(

All of the clothes fit me!!! But they’re so low-cut!

Walmart is a thing that exists again!

The house is so big!

Where’s the otohime? (Otohime = a button you push in the restroom that makes running water noises so no one can hear what you’re doing in the toilet)

My drink is so big! I can’t drink all that!

Oh my God it’s salt. There’s salt. On my table. At a restaurant. I didn’t have to request it.

Oh yeah, I have to tip people again.

And so on.

Granted, Reverse Culture Shock eventually goes away for good, so I have that to look forward to. But for all of you who will spend any considerable time with me for the next couple years, I apologize in advance for any statement which begins, “Well, in Japan...”

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Top 10 Things I Will Definitely Miss a Lot

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1. Bath Culture

Japanese people take their baths seriously. If you’ve been to Japan, you know this to be true. Bathrooms are just that--the room with the bathtub and shower and nothing else. The tub is deep enough to sit in comfortably for hours. And there’s a very specific way you’re supposed to bathe:

-Step 1: Scrub the tub Do this every night so you never have to scrub and scrub and scrub. Just spray the tub with water, coat it with cleaner, and run over once with your awesome tub scrubber that extends and pivots so you don’t have to bend down and kill your knees.

-Step 2: Draw a bath In some houses, you can even control the temperature of your bath with a remote control. You can also set a timer so the bath draws itself automatically every night.

-Step 3: Cover the bath with your nifty bathtub cover

-Step 4: Stand outside the tub and use your showerhead to take a shower

-Step 5: Remove bathtub cover and soak for the rest of your life

And because baths are super important, you can buy awesome bath products everywhere. Like that scrubber I mentioned above. Or a stool you can sit on while you shower because comfort. Body scrubbers, body soaps, an entire aisle of bath salts and bath bombs, buckets so you can rinse yourself off with actual bath water, shower caps (that actually work) for those times when you don’t want to wash your hair, and even sponges that make the mirror in your bathroom not fog up. (Don’t ask me why there’s a mirror in the bathroom...but there is.)

I’ll admit, when I first came to Japan I was completely baffled by all of this. But it’s super amazing, and I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do without my nightly bath now.

And don’t even get me started on the onsen (public open-air baths).

Want to relax with a beautiful view? Onsen.

Been out hiking all day and want to freshen up before your 3 hour drive home? Onsen.

Want to warm up after a day in the snow? Onsen.

Don’t have anything else to do? Onsen.

Onsen is always the answer. Onsen is life.

Why doesn’t the U.S. have onsen? I will be so sad to leave them behind...

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2. Random Products to Make Your Life Better

Cold? Don’t worry, just buy some disposable hot packs. They come in “sticky” and “unsticky” and in just about any size you can think of. Put them wherever you like. Pockets, shoes, or anywhere else that’s cold.

Hot? Don’t worry, we have hand fans, scarves that literally cool you off, and UV-protectant umbrellas.

Tired? Don’t worry, we have energy shots.

Hungover? There’s a drink for that too, conveniently available at any convenience store.

Tired of dusting your shelves? Just buy this super awesome sticky paper that goes on the bottom...when it gets dirty, just rip away and toss it.

Tired of your bookshelves falling over in those pesky earthquakes? We have super, super sticky pads to glue them to your floor.

Tired of your perfectly-rolled toothpaste tube unrolling when you let go of it? Toothpaste squeezer will fix that pesky problem.

Tired of your bathroom mirror fogging up when you shower? We have a sponge for that.

Want to chop your leeks in perfect slices every time? There’s a kitchen tool for that.

Want to look like a samurai while your beautify? There’s a face mask for that.

Tired of your boring kitchen sponge, timer, hot water bottle, toilet brush, masking tape, file folder, calculator, toilet paper, etc.? Don’t worry--it comes in “cute.”

Seriously, Japan is like the never-ending land of slightly useful but mostly unnecessary products. A trip to the 100 Yen Store is never a dull trip. And when I return home, the lack of endlessly entertaining cheap crap will certainly leave me feeling sad.

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3. No Shoes Inside

I used to make fun of people in the States doing this. I used to roll my eyes at people who insisted I take my shoes off before entering their house. To those people--I am deeply sorry.

Japanese people change their shoes every time they enter a building. Instead, they wear indoor shoes that have never seen the outdoor world or just slippers that are adorable and can easily be folded up into a bag and carried around to various locations. But the point is, no indoor shoes go outside and no outside shoes go inside.

It makes the world so much cleaner.

I’m definitely doing this back in the States.

(Though Japan can keep the toilet slippers thing...I’m not that crazy!)

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4. Money and Free Time

Many people compare the JET Program to study abroad. A lot of people join the program for a “gap year” between college and their real jobs. And there’s a definite reason for this. I, as an ALT, have so much free time it’s ridiculous.

My first year, I had so much free time at work that I quite literally spent more time sitting at my desk studying Japanese than I did in the classroom.

My second year, I started taking random online classes to fill this time. That year I got TEFL-certified and I learned JavaScript.

My third year, I was both Block Leader and AJET President, the work for both of which took up all of my free time.

And the point remains that I’ve never actually done that much “work” at work.

But having few responsibilities in the office is good in other ways, too--mainly, I don’t have to stay late and I never have to do work on weekends. There are no papers to grade or lessons to make that I can’t do during my free time in the normal work day. This leaves my after-work schedule wide open for all kinds of cool things. Weeknights are filled with Dungeons and Dragons, board games, Japanese class, and TV nights, and weekends are filled with trips and events galore. It’s amazing all of the things I’ve done and all of the places I’ve gone since I moved to Japan--things I never would have considered in the States. And although some of that was simply the “adventure is out there” mindset that infects many JETs, a lot of it is made possible by a generous salary and A LOT of free time. Although there are many days where I wish I had more responsibility in my job, there’s a lot to be said for having free time to climb mountains, go skiing, and drive 3 hours to see some famous shrine because why not?

I know that freedom will change once I’m back in the U.S. with big girl responsibilities. I hope I’ll be able to make time for the things I enjoy, though I know my opportunities to enjoy them will become few and far between.

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5. Presents for Inconveniences

Japan gives presents for everything. It’s really funny most of the time. For example, when I first came to Japan, I went to get a cell phone and walked away with a cell phone and a free supermarket-sized bottle of laundry deodorant bead things (idk, they make your clothes smell good and you just dump them in the washer with your detergent...as far as I can tell they don’t do anything but make your clothes smell like flowers). This is fairly common...I also got presents for opening a bank account and for getting an apartment. It’s just a “thing” here to entice people into signing on with a certain company.

But even better than the presents for “new” accounts are the presents you get for being inconvenienced. Let me tell you a story.

Usually, when I pay for school lunch, I pay once a month and it’s just deducted from my bank account with no muss or fuss. But about a month ago, the payment for my school lunch changed from once every month to once every two months. No one thought it was important to tell me this, and so when bill-pay time rolled around I didn’t have enough in my account to cover the full amount. So they sent me a physical bill which can only be paid at the bank during bank hours.

Banks in Japan are both really cool and really frustrating. But in this case they were frustrating. Banks are only open until 3 p.m. and never on weekends. If you want to go to the bank to do anything, you have to go in the middle of the work day. Which is fine for people who can drive to the bank, but not so much for people who can’t drive to work and therefore don’t have a car to use to go to the bank and therefore have to walk for 50 minutes to get to the bank. So in order to go to the bank, I had to wait for an afternoon where I didn’t have any classes and take 2.5 hours of vacation time to walk to the bank to pay this bill. I went, I paid for it, end of story, right?

Wrong. Because the teller at the bank had made a mistake...she was supposed to give me 10 yen ( about 10 cents) in change and instead gave me 100 yen (about a dollar). Neither of us caught this mistake and I left without any more thought to my time at the bank. That is, until about an hour later (after the bank had closed and I’d finished walking home) when I got a phone call from a panicked bank teller who, in the midst of many “excuse me”s and “sorry to bother you”s explained to me that she had made a mistake and I would have to go back to the bank so I could give her 90 yen.

“Can’t you just deduct it from my account?” I asked, thinking this was the most reasonable solution to the problem. But the answer was many “excuse me”s and “sorry to trouble you”s with a “sorry, we can’t” message thrown in somewhere.

I explained my situation to her--that I had to take vacation time to go to the bank and I could only go on afternoons where I wouldn’t have class--days which are super rare, and the earliest I could return to the bank would be Friday of the following week, the bank teller came up with a solution. The following day, she would send a bank employee to my school to meet me, verify the mistake, and get the 90 yen. I was both amazed and amused...because only in Japan would a bank send an employee to collect the equivalent of less than a dollar in change from a client (and only in Japan would it (a) matter and (b) have been recorded in enough detail that the teller could have figured out that out of all the people she had given change to that day, it was me she had made the mistake with). But whatever, it meant I wouldn’t have to go back to the bank again, so I agreed and the following day at the specified time the guy came and took my 90 yen.

I’ll admit that even though the bank was coming to meet me, I was pretty aggravated by the whole ordeal, and had spent those 21 hours between the phone call and the guy’s visit mentally fussing about Japanese banks and their annoying habits.

But as the guy was leaving, in the midst of many “thank you”s, “excuse me”s, and “sorry to bother you”s, he gave me a pen with Arukuma on it (the Mascot character for Nagano prefecture) and three highlighters as presents for having inconvenienced me. Immediately I became un-annoyed. Because (a) Cool! Free stuff! And (b) OMG IT HAS ARUKUMA ON IT!!!!!

The moral of the story is, it might be a pain in the ass to deal with Japanese banks, but when they screw up you get cool free stuff. I think I can live with that.

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6. Politeness, Part 2

Politeness in Japan is cultural. It’s almost unheard of for any Japanese person to be anything but completely polite to anyone they meet in their daily lives. Frustration and fussing is reserved only for one’s family and extremely close friends, and as a result, it’s very rare to have any sort of argument with someone who is Japanese. Japanese people are so polite they have a whole extra language (called “keigo”) devoted to being polite--the idiosyncrasies of which are so complex that many Japanese people have to take classes on it in college so they can properly use it in their future business dealings.

As you can imagine, this has its down sides, which is why I talked about the flip side to this element of Japanese culture in the previous section. But in all honesty, it’s really nice a lot of the time, too.

For example, have you ever walked into a store and the clerk has been in a bad mood? You haven’t done anything wrong, but they’ve had a sucky day and their smile is just a little forced...their thank you just a little sarcastic...maybe they huff a little when they have to stop what they’re working on to ring you up or you hear them gossiping with another employee about “this one really horrible customer” who left 30 minutes ago. It’s kind of off-putting, right? Except, while this is common in the U.S. (I know because I’ve worked retail and I know I’m guilty of behaving that way), this would absolutely never, ever, ever happen in Japan. Because no matter how much your day has sucked in Japan, you just don’t show it. Sure, maybe you go home and complain to your family, but it is expressed and stays for eternity within that close-knit group. I know for a fact that as a foreigner, I’ve done some stupid things in stores in Japan. And I know that employees I’ve dealt with go home and tell their families about “this one time when the crazy foreigner came into my store.” But the point is...no matter how frustrated I’m making them in the store, they never, ever stop smiling and treating me with respect.

It’s been a nice change of pace from the U.S. where people swear at you for bumping into them on the street, you know? And also, it kind of rubs off on you...

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7. My Students

In the U.S., classroom management is an art form. It must be developed for years and years before any new teacher is even remotely good at it. And during my student teaching, I learned that lesson hard (as do most student teachers, I imagine). Don’t get me wrong--I loved teaching in the U.S. and I certainly plan to continue in the future. And a lot of my students were really good kids. But any 8th grade class in the States in chaos incarnate, and nothing any teacher does ever will change that.

After my first week teaching in Japan, one of my JTEs asked me, “What do you think is the biggest difference between Japanese and American schools?”

She probably expected me to talk about the daily cleaning time or the teachers’ instructional habits, but what popped out of my mouth was, “The students.”

“How so?” she asked, and I proceeded to explain how completely amazed I was that the students would just sit there in class. There was no talking, no getting up to go to the bathroom, no paper airplanes, no loud noises, no class clowns, no students dropping their books or sneezing every 5 minutes...they were all completely, 100% compliant with the teacher. They were content to sit there and take notes for hours on end with no misbehavior or rebellion to be seen. I was completely and utterly astounded.

Over time, I’ve learned that not all classes in my schools are free of behavior problems, and that, of course, the kids are still kids and are completely crazy during break times and after school. And yet the fact remains that almost no classroom management is necessary in any of my classrooms.

Of course, the ease of classroom management isn’t the only thing I’ll miss about my students. They’re all great kids, and I’ve taught them all for three years now. I’ve come to know a lot of them very well, and I’ll miss them very much when I leave, but that’s nothing new. I have students from my student teaching that I miss, and I’ve known students in the past 3 years who have graduated and who I miss quite a bit--the girls I cleaned with my first year who taught me about ARASHI while I taught them how to sing Disney songs in English; the boy and girl the next year who studied abroad during summer vacation and hunted me down every day to have a conversation; the girls last year who couldn’t speak English very well but who always tried in such loud and excited voices; the boys who think it’s funny that I say “hello” to them and will run up and down the stairs or the hallway over and over again, saying “hello” to me every time they pass me; the girl who is afraid to speak but who smiles at me in the hallway now; the girl who says “yoh-hoh” to me instead of “hello” and who loves pine cones enough to bring them to school whenever she finds them to show to all her friends...there are so many, and I’ll be sorry to leave them behind. But the classroom management, though...that’s definitely an added bonus.

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8. Public Transportation

My friends and I all agree--the number one way in which the U.S. is inferior to Japan is public transportation. Local trains, express trains, bullet trains, city busses, highway trams, subways, monorails, taxis, planes, and more--Japan has it down pat, that’s for sure. Getting from Point A to Point B is always easy, comfortable, usually convenient, and roughly the same price as (if not cheaper than) driving.

Granted, Japan is not the only country with awesome public transportation systems--in fact most places I’ve visited in Asia have some kind of modern rail and bus system in place. It seems only the U.S. is behind the times on this point, with transport systems few and far between and not at all clean or comfortable. Maybe one day that will change, but for the time being, I’ll certainly miss the trains.

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9. Tea...Tea Everywhere

I never really liked tea before I came to Japan. Now I love it. Tea is everywhere (so is coffee too, but it’s more respectable to drink tea in Japan than it is in the west). You can buy tea leaves and bags pretty much anywhere, from supermarkets to convenience stores. Any place that will sell you coffee on tap will sell you tea as well. And you can find pretty much any flavor of tea you want. Not to mention that, because everyone loves tea so much, staff rooms are always stocked with hot water and tea bags and co-workers routinely make large pots of tea to share with everyone. Having a mug at your desk is practically a necessity. But if you don’t have one don’t worry, you can use one of the school’s fancy china tea cups instead!

But tea isn’t available as only tea. No, you can also buy tea-flavored ice cream, tea-flavored cake...even tea “flavored” bath bombs. And somewhere along the line, I’ve grown to love the tea. I’m going to have to find out where I can buy the good stuff in the States...

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10. My Friends

The thing I’ll probably miss most of all are the people I’ve met over the last three years.

Back in the U.S. I never had that many friends...but when I did make friends with people I’d stay close with them forever. I can count the number of people I’ve considered “friends” before Japan on two hands, and most of them I’m still friends with. This is mostly because I’ve never had much time for “other people” in my life, and I prefer to spend most of my free time alone and recharging after a day spent with too many people. But in coming to Japan with the JET Program, I joined a massive network of people from all over the world who mostly consider each other friendly and trustworthy.

Communities are everywhere in JET--I have just under 10 communities which I routinely participate in, either online or in person. But the people who live in my prefecture and in my block have become some amazing friends. Will they ever top the love I feel for the friends I’ve known my whole life? Probably not. But all the same, they mean a lot to me. These are people I meet with to play board games or people who come to NagaYes events or people who come to AJET parties and trips or people who just happen to live near me and work in my city. There are people I call when I want to go to the movies, people I call when I want to play board games, people I call when I want to go hiking, and people I call when I want to drop everything at the last minute and go on an adventure. And usually, these people are more than up for the task at hand. I am connected to this community, and knowing I’m about to return home, to be away from them by several thousand miles, and to know that I can’t go to Chushin’s NagaYes next year (or the Ski Trip or the hanami party or that big camping trip everyone decided would be a cool thing to do) is really sad. I know I’ll be with my other friends and family, but I also know that things in the U.S. will never be what they were here.

Leaving is a lonely thing, and although I know it’s what I have to do, I’ll still miss all of my wonderful fellow-Naganites. Maybe we’ll meet again someday.

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Credits:

I did not draw any of the above comics. They come from the talents of...

Life After the BOE

Texan in Tokyo

Fried Chicken and Sushi

Mary Cagle

[annakie]

I watched a lot of TV / Netflix last week.  A Lot.  Here’s some thoughts on what I watched, outside of Star Trek, which could use its own post.  I wanted to stick with media I didn’t have a deep attachment to at this point, so I caught up with “New” things I’d been meaning to watch while I pushed everything aside to focus on Trek.

Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency (Not on Netflix, everything else below was) - I’d been saving this one for awhile.  I’d read Douglas Adams’ books as a kid and liked ‘em, though I hadn’t read them since I was a teen.  Now I want to go back and read them.  Anyway, very much liked the show.  It did get pretty convoluted at the end, but I’m hoping there will be a season 2 to look forward to.

The Crown - Would you like to see Matt Smith’s bare ass? Because that’s in this show.  But honestly, I could readily see why it’s been nominated for All The Awards.  Also, I learned a lot about Early/Mid century England I didn’t already know.  (I know the history is slightly fanficced, but pretty accurate.) Well worth the watch.

The 3% - I’d watched the first ep a month or two ago and resolved to finish it once I finished Star Trek.  Glad I did, it was a fun show.  Somewhat cliched in several areas but a good “Who’s making it, whos not?” Hunger-Games type feel.  The dubbed voice acting was subparr in some places, but mostly decent.  Since I watch TV while playing video games, subtitles aren’t really an option.

Travelers - Eric McCormick McCormicking it up in a time-travellers coming back in time to take over the bodies of people who were gonna die anyway to make things better in the future story.  It was pretty good.  Worth the watch. Feels like they still have a lot of story to tell. Reminded me of Continium in a lot of ways.

The White Rabbit Project - Grant, Tory and Kari from Mythbusters’ new show.  The premise is they talk about 6 related things then rank them.  So like an episode about annoying technologies, an episode about con artists, an episode about Speed / G-Force. Some sciency, some historical.  The show was definitely way stronger when they were doing some Mythbusters-esque stuff, like Grant building stuff, Kari delving into weirder sciency stuff, Tory driving fast cars, everyone blowing stuff up.  The most unfortunate part was that their con artist’ episode was literally half stories that were all just told on an episode of Drunk History 2 or 3 months ago.  Not their fault, but still, felt really weak after seeing it on DH.  Anyway, it was still enjoyable, I’d watch another season.  I am rooting for those guys, I always liked them.

ARQ - Just a Netflix Original Movie, but worth the 1.5 hours of watching it.  

The OA - I hated, hated, hated the first hour of this show, then the last 15 minutes of the pilot got really good.  I was going to give up on it after the first episode if it didn’t hook me.  It did.  Finished it last night. Not a big fan of the ending, but the story is good.  I’ve seen some articles saying it doesn’t need a S2.  I think it does.

Next up: Season 2 of The Man in the High Castle.