#anyway my friend was dying of laughter and she got a pic to save it for posterity

[synonymouslyyours]

.

[dlwritings]

Never Have I Ever | Tom Holland

masterlist found here

pairing - Tom x reader word count - 2,193 warnings - implications of sex and mention of nudes A/N - for the two anons who requested | the Never Have I Ever bit is based on this classic One Direction interview

summary - You and Tom had been dating for a while, and a stupid iCloud hacker caused some intimate pictures to leak. When things get a little awkward at an interview, your cast mates had your back.

It’s in the moments when life is going really well that one should start to get suspicious. Especially when your life is so publicized, you should always be on your toes.

You should’ve known when things were going so well with Tom that they were bound to come crashing down eventually.

Your relationship had been going on privately for about six months. You met on the set of Spider-Man: Far From Home. You weren’t playing an important character or anything, just one of the background students going on the European trip. Something about you just caught Tom’s eye. The more time he spent with you, the more he realized he was falling for you.

However, your publicists were both very strict about your relationship needing to remain private. While nothing about the two of you being together was illegal, the world didn’t exactly need to see Hollywood heartthrob 23-year-old Tom Holland parading around with up-and-coming singer-slash-actress 18-year-old (Y/N) (Y/L/N). Everyone on your teams could already see the headlines, and they wouldn’t exactly do wonders for either of your images. Tom would be seen as a perverted cradle robber, and you would be seen as a ladder-climbing slut. It was pretty much a lose-lose situation.

So, you kept it on the downlow. Your friends, immediate family, and fellow castmates knew, but you never went public about it. This didn’t mean you couldn’t go on dates together, but PDA had to be minimal to non existent. This wasn’t a huge deal, because you weren’t one to make out with your boyfriend in public anyway. So, everything was going fine.

Again, that was when you should’ve realized everything was about to go to shit.

There were a few weeks when Tom was filming in Prague and you didn’t need to be there, so you were home in London. During those weeks, it was only natural for you and Tom to have some intimate conversations. You were both young, and going from almost daily sex to none at all wasn’t easy. You sent him a few pictures, he reciprocated, there were a few steamy phone calls and some text messages here and there, but that was it. It was all normal young adult behavior. The only thing was, neither of you were considered normal young adults.

You got the phone call in the dead of night. One phone call you might’ve missed, but the endless stream that was coming in was impossible to ignore. You saw the caller ID read Monica - manager, so you answered it, feeling panic settle in your chest immediately. Monica was a friend at this point -practically an older sister- but she would have no positive reason to call at 1:00 in the morning.

“Everything’s fine,” she said as soon as you picked up.

“Monica-”

“Someone hacked Tom’s iCloud,” she said.

“Okay,” you said slowly. “So?”

She cleared her throat awkwardly. “Apparently, the two of you have shared some, um, intimate phot-”

“OH MY GOD!” you screamed. “NO! No way! FUCK!”

“It’s okay,” she said, trying to calm you down. “It’s okay.”

“It’s very clearly not okay!” you shouted. “My naked photos are on the internet! You know who has access to the internet?”

“I mean-”

“Everyone!” you said. “And you know who is a part of everyone?”

“(Y/N)-”

“My mom!” I shouted. “My mom is going to see naked photos of me. She probably thinks I’m still a virgin! Oh my god. The whole world is going to think I’m a slut.”

“Okay, but you’re not a slut,” Monica said, her voice soothing.

“But-”

“It’s very important to me that you know that this does not make you a slut,” she said. There was that older sister vibe coming out. “Everyone shares nudes, alright? Someone else stealing and sharing those doesn’t make you a slut. Okay?”

You took a stabilizing breath. “Okay.”

“We took the picture down where it was originally posted,” she said. “I’m sure people have already saved it though, but you know what? It’s going to be fine. We’ll tackle the PR when it comes up. There’s nothing we can do about it now except handle it like adults and remind the world that you and Tom are both adults.”

Tom.

“Okay,” you said again. “Thanks for calling me.”

“Try and get some sleep,” she said. “I’ll call you in the morning.”

“Sleep,” you scoffed. “Right.”

As soon as you hung up with Monica, you called Tom. He picked up on the first ring. “(Y/N)-”

“Why’d you put it on the cloud?” you shouted, unable to stop yourself.

“Everything backs up automatically!” he said defensively. “This isn’t my fault!”

“Well it isn’t my fault!”

“I’m not saying it is!”

“Whose fault is it then?”

“The 40-something-year-old pervert who hacked into my account and leaked the photos!”

You couldn’t help but let out a short laugh. Tom did the same, and you ran a hand through your messy bedhead. “This is a disaster, Tom,” you mumbled.

“I know,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you said, waving a hand dismissively even though he couldn’t see it.

“You know, it’s going to be brought up next week during press,” Tom said. In your sleepy state, you had forgotten that next week, you were starting press for the film. You sighed into the receiver.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” you said.

The following week came, and neither you nor Tom had responded to any of the internet’s comments on the nudes. Your publicists both decided it would be best to address the situation only when it arose during an interview. That way, the words could come directly from your mouths without any chance of misinterpretation or poor wording from a tweet or Instagram post. It would also come across as more professional than if Tom blabbed about it during an Instagram live.

The first interview that happened was on Jimmy Kimmel Live. You had both done an interview with Jimmy before, and he was one of the nicest guys on late night TV. You hoped he would be kind about it all. Maybe, if you were lucky, he wouldn’t even bring it up. To make the night even better, you would be sharing the couch with Jake, Jacob, and Zendaya. You knew you’d be a little bit more at ease with them there.

Everything about the interview was going fine at first. Jimmy was asking you all questions about the film and what life behind the scenes was like with such a crazy cast. After the commercial break, Jimmy informed the audience that you would be playing a game. The game, of course, had already been approved by your PR team. That didn’t mean you had any idea what it was.

“We’ve asked Twitter to send in their best questions for never have I ever,” Jimmy said. “Now, I’ve not seen any of these questions, but they have been cleared by our team.” Jimmy handed the five of you paddles that read I HAVE on one side and NEVER on the other. “I will be playing too, because I think it’s only fair,” he said with his usual smile.

You could hear your heart beating in your ears, but you painted on your superstar smile to mask your nerves. Surely the questions wouldn’t be that bad if Jimmy’s team cleared them.

“From Paula comes, Never have I ever danced naked in the rain,” Jimmy said.

“In the rain?” Tom said.

“Naked?” Jacob clarified. Jimmy nodded with a laugh as he flipped it to the NEVER side. Everyone put NEVER except Jacob.

“Alright, Jacob?” Tom laughed.

“Listen, we’ve all had some wild nights, alright?” he said. “This is a judgement free couch.”

“Alright, next,” Jimmy said with a laugh, “comes from John: Never have I ever joined the mile high club.”

You and Tom looked at each other for a millisecond that you hoped wasn’t caught on camera. Even though it was a lie, you put NEVER. There were some things you just weren’t going to reveal about yourself, even if the whole world had already seen you naked. Jake put I HAVE, and swore he wouldn’t say who he joined with. 

“From Alex: Never have I ever-” Jimmy cut himself off with an awkward laugh. You could tell he wasn’t too thrilled with the questions either. You wondered if someone would get fired after this. “Never have I ever been naked in public.” More questions went by like that: smoked a joint, slept with someone twice or half my age. All things that could stir up PR nightmares and just made you into a liar. 

Jimmy started to read the next. “From Kayla: Never have I ever-” It was evident he was upset, and you wondered for a moment if he’d even read it aloud. “Never have I ever taken a nude photo.”

Laughter spread across the audience as you all played with the paddles in your hands. You couldn’t even get yourself to look at the camera, and Jimmy threw his paddle over his shoulder. “Whoever picked these questions,” he said with a slight laugh, “is in for a stern talking to tonight.”

“Honestly, what did they expect?” Jake asked. “You give us these paddles, and you really think we’re suddenly going to answer these questions? Like Yeah!” He waved his own paddle in the air. “I’ve done all the drugs! Cocaine, heroine! Marijuana is a pussy’s drug.” At this point, you couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or serious. Still, the audience laughed, and Jake threw his paddle behind him too. He looked at the camera and pointed at it. “We know what you sick perverts want,” he said, “but listen here. These kids-” He pointed at you, Tom, Zendaya, and Jacob. “-are media trained superstars, alright? You really think that Tom “Spider-Man” Holland is gonna stand up and say, This morning, I woke up, rolled a joint-” He was doing a terrible British accent while miming his actions and had everyone dying. “-and then took a dick pic before running through the streets of Los Angeles butt ass naked? You really think this guy is gonna say that? They’re not gonna say that!”

Zendaya took the paddle from Tom and took yours as well, then put them together so the I HAVE sides were touching and both sides of the paddle said NEVER. “They might as well say this, Jimmy,” she said, thrusting the paddles back into your hands. “Never, and never. Never. Never.”

“Yeah!” Jacob agreed. “You all are sick!” He folded his arms across his chest with a sarcastic huff, and everyone applauded him while laughing. You almost had tears in your eyes.

Within a few minutes, the show went to commercial break, and Jimmy apologized profusely to the five of you, mostly to you and Tom since everyone knew the questions were directed more at you. “I honestly had no idea what the questions were,” he said. “I have no idea why they were cleared.”

“It’s fine,” you said. “I think it’s safe to say though that you guys-” You looked at Jake, Zendaya, and Jacob. “-saved us.”

“We’ve always got your back,” Zendaya said, giving your arm a comforting squeeze. You smiled and laid your head on her shoulder while Jacob reached out and squeezed your hand. Jake was talking quietly to Tom, and you could see in both of their eyes that Jake was saying something meaningful. Tom was smiling appreciatively and nodding along.

By the time you and Tom got back to your hotel, the clip of you on Jimmy’s show was already trending. You showed Tom all the tweets, and the two of you shared a laugh. “Glad we can laugh about it now,” Tom said, getting under the covers of the bed beside you.

“Oh believe me, I’m still crying inside,” you said, “but the others made it a little easier.”

“And I didn’t?” Tom teased.

“You’re the one who got them leaked in the first place,” you said.

“You said-”

“I’m joking, div,” you said, hitting him with one of the pillows. Tom laughed and lightly smacked you back. You eventually curled back up to his side, and Tom put his arm around you.

“In all seriousness,” he said, “I’m really sorry this all happened.” You looked up at him to see him already looking down at you. “It’s not fair that this shit is already happening to you. I feel like, like I’m supposed to protect you, you know? And I just fucked that right up.”

“You don’t need to protect me,” you said. “That’s an extremely outdated gender role.” You placed a kiss to his neck, just below his jaw. “But I appreciate you looking out for me. We can’t control the rest of the world. Just ourselves. Just because I can’t trust the rest of the world to respect my privacy doesn’t mean I can’t trust you.”

You were both quiet for a long time, and just when you thought Tom had dozed off-

“You’ll still send me nudes when I’m away, right?”

“I hate you.”

----- ----- ----- -----

TAGLIST

@bangtan-serendipity | @planetdemon | @the-singing-clown406 | @tomshufflepuff | @bluelalal | @grandloser | @jackiehollanderr | @mindset-jupiter | @bisexual-sk8r | @feel-like-gold | @runaway-apple | @miraclesoflove | @marvelismylifffe| @wonderbyers | @coraz0ndcristal| @lizmarvel​ |  @hannihannelora

[angrylizardjacket]

and everything that goes with it; i thank you all

A/N: So........ ash v. social media v. borhap cast i guess??? no-one asked for this, but i love them.

[aydtd]

It definitely starts as a joke.

“Hey, Ma Rocket?” Joe’s filming on his phone during a costume trial. With her arms crossed, Ash is partially hidden by Rami who’s spinning, the frills of his shirt fanning out around him. She’s frowning, thoughtful and pensive, but when Joe calls, she turns to him, eyebrows raised and expectant.

“Aye?” She’s not smiling, mind obviously still pondering over the fit of Rami’s costume, but it’s a clear enough acknowledgement that Joe’s response is clearly spoken through a smile.

“You responded; you’re the on-set mom now.” He declares. Ben laughs from somewhere off camera. “No takebacks.” Joe follows it up with, but Ash is already wearing a longsuffering look of resignation. The video cuts off before she can flip him off, but her movements are too deliberate to be misconstrued as anything else. The video is released almost a full year later, once the NDA has been lifted on the movie and Behind the Scenes pictures and videos start flooding out, but at that point the joke had moved beyond being just that.

Ash is not hard won; kindness and respect win her loyalty easily, it’s just that those traits are sometimes hard to come by in this industry, and she’s often dismissed because of her age, especially by younger performers. Bohemian Rhapsody is different, of course in part because they all know who she is by virtue of who they’re playing,

Joe’s not her favourite, not officially, and neither is Ben, much to his quiet disappointment; officially her favourite is Karen, and everyone else is tied second, but each of them holds a very special place in her heart and soon that begins to bleed into her social media, as well as some of theirs. Ash gets Instagram at Joe’s behest, only a month before the world premiere of Bohemian Rhapsody. It’s not as if she’s lived her life in obscurity, but come the turn of the millennium, her time at the edge of the spotlight had mostly come to an end, and she had been able to continue her work behind the curtain of pop culture for almost twenty years. This was all new, and unexpected, but she tried to take it in stride.

So she follows the cast, of course, follows Roger and Brian and the Official Queen page, as well as any of her friends or former clients she can find, and much to their horror, her children. Okay so her son isn’t horrified since he’s a public figure and he doesn’t use it for personal photos, but both her daughters have posted pictures of themselves in bikinis, and they thought they’d be safe since Roger followed them after the photos were posted, and at least he never went back and liked any of their old photos. Ash likes every single photoeach of her children has even posted, and all three are a little horrified.

That’s a cute one of us at Bonfire Night!! Is one of the many comments she leaves across the entire timeline of Astrid’s Instagram history, this particular one being from a 2014 photo, and so Astrid herself posts a screenshot of her mother blowing up her notification on her story.

@joemazzello what have you done

Joe subsequently posts a screenshot of a set of DMs between himself and Astrid on his own story.

Yesterday @ 3:47am

@astro_winnie: then tell him to change his oil

@astro_winnie: what a heathen

Today @ 1:21pm

@astro_winnie has mentioned you in her story

@joemazzello: What exactly are you accusing me of here?

@astro_winnie: mum didn’t have an Instagram yesterday 🤔🤔

@astro_winnie: I don’t know how but this is your fault

@joemazzello: she’s just having fun 😂😂

@astro_winnie: SHE LIKED MY BIKINI PIC FROM 2 YEARS AGO IM DYINg

The whole conversation is captioned ’Well anyways, go follow Ma Rocket @rockettaylor49’. The following picture on his story, posted ten minutes later, is a clarification that he isn’t actually Ash’s son, that it’s just a nickname. Even so, Ash’s actual son gets a photo with him at the premiere and caption it ‘brother from another mother (probably) @joemazzello’ and it goes viral on both Tumblr and Twitter.

Ash’s first official post is a picture of herself and Freddie, a Polaroid of the two of them aged beyond belief, taken in 1969. It’s the only photo she had when she was still in uni, and even she seems surprised to see it. Roger finds her staring at it, expression blank as she looks at where they keep it, pride of place, over the mantle. Without even asking, he understands, and he presses a kiss to her temple.

’@rockettaylor49: My favourite client helped me with this caption, he said I should remind you all that you can have more than one love of your life, and that that love isn’t necessarily romantic. To me, Freddie was family from the moment I met him, and I love and miss him every day. Freddie & Me. 1969.’

The post is flooded with love and support and more heart emojis than you can shake a stick at, and it’s not long before she’s amassed a large following. The only outlier in the initial comments comes from her second daughter, Cate.

@cate.astrophy: @rogertaylorofficial got upgraded to favourite client. nice.

The entire rest of the family, as well as a few random unknowns, like the comment.

Ash’s aesthetic is surprisingly clean; old photos from back in the day, old initial costume designs in sketchbooks, the paper gold with age and colours faded, but still with her initial notes scribbled neatly around the edges. The only modern things she posts are photos of shopping bags filled with fabric she’s just purchased, and photos of her friends and family.

There’s only one selfie on her page. Its Ash, poorly framed if only to keep Joe in focus behind her where he’s leaning against the door to a trailer and double over with laughter, with Ben glaring through the window at both of them.

’@rockettaylor49: Trixie gave me a selfie stick and Ben tried to confiscate it when he heard me say 'selfie’ so he was locked out. Usually I was with Roger on the other side of the door back when Deaky was locking us out of places… What a terrible influence he was!! But anyways here you all go, my first selfie. Me & Trixie featuring My Disrespectful Boy, Ben. 2018.’

The way the cast call her ‘Ma’ definitely started out as a joke, mostly between Joe, Ben, and Ash, but it slowly spreads to the others.

“Where’s The Golden Boy?” Ash calls on set, holding a cap for Rami, who was warming up. It’s rather endearing, the way he jogs to her wearing a smile.

“Here, Ma, what do you need from me?” 

“Hat.” Is all she says, presenting it to him. They’ve always had a soft spot for each other, having worked together on Night At the Museum and it’s sequels for several years. He was one of the last to pick up the habit of calling her ‘ma’, after spending so long calling her Rocket, but he’s grown into it, they all have. Even some of the crew have taken to using the nickname, or some variation.

And maybe she leans into it, leans into her age and her wisdom, and they know they’re sort of telling her story too, but there’s a disconnect when they look at her, at her greying hair and the deep laugh lines around her mouth, and they forget who exactly she is. Though sometimes, rarely, they’re given sharp reminders.

There’s a video on Gwil’s phone that he later puts on Instagram once he has her permission, and the NDA has come to an end, of Ash on the set of Live Aid. She’s sitting on the edge of the stage, legs hanging over the edge, and Roger’s in front of her, at the perfect height to rest his chin on her knees. 

“Do you think you can still do that impression of yours?” Roger’s voice is barely audible, but he’s grinning, and Ash cards a hand through his short, white hair.

“Which- oh, the Freddie- oh Christ,” she laughs, “this’d be the place for it, aye?” And she starts clearing her throat, about the time that Roger spots Gwil and his curious camera.

“Sorry, was just trying to catch a video of the empty stadium,” Gwil’s voice can be heard, and Roger laughs, which causes Ash to turn. Seeing Gwil, she smiles, and nods at the camera.

“You’re gonna wanna get a video of this,” Roger grins, nudging Ash’s knee, and she turns an amusing shade of pink, struggling to her feet. Gwil rushes forward to help her up, but Ash brushes him off.

“I used to do this with Freds to help him warm up, and whenever I was side of stage,” she says, a strangely fond smile on her face as she reminisces, “I’m no singer, never have been, this is probably as close as I’ll get,” she warned, looking straight at the camera.

Taking a deep breath, she clears her throat, and belts out ‘ay-oh’. As if being summoned by a siren, everyone who can hear her, responds in kind. Smiling, pleased, she continues with the bit, as does everyone else, slowly gathering around her. It sounds uncannily like Freddie, and she holds an arm out to Rami to join her in leading the gathered crowd, which he agrees to with a bright grin, which ends with him yelling ‘hey, hey, hey, Hammer to Fall!’ and Ash, as well as the rest of the crew, bursts out into laughter.

The video’s posted with the caption ‘Ash Mercury in her prime’. All three of Ash and Roger’s kids comment about how they hadn’t heard her do that in so long, and not for the first time, Gwilym finds himself marveling at what it would be like to have Ash and Roger as actual parents.

Once the camera’s off, Ash  talks quietly about how she and Freddie used to practice it, because he couldn’t teach Ash to sing to save his life, but he’d be damned if he couldn’t teach her this.

“He was like, an actual brother to her,” Ben says quietly when he and the other three boys are gathered together, checking in before they finally started filming.

“Yeah, it’s crazy to think some times; she took his last name for a full fifteen years," Rami muses, and there’s something that warms in his heart whenever he catches Ash’s wistful gaze as she watches them perform, quietly grateful.

There’s a few videos here and there from set from Ash, little moments she finds endearing, usually set to music;

She catches her son, Barney, and his partner dancing to Seaside Rendezvous alone in the makeup truck, joyful and bright, they sway together to the beat as her son sings along, and his partner laughs fondly, pressing their smile against his chest as he tries to make kazoo noises.

When Cate, her middle daughter, comes to set, she takes a seat by the piano and plays the opening for Seven Seas of Rhye.

“That’s the one he wrote for you, isn’t it?” She turns, beaming, and Ash sits beside her. Again, Cate plays the opening, and Ash hums along, out of key, and Cate swallows her own gentle laughter, instead singing along.

Karen Gillan has a perm in order to play Ash, but unlike Joe, she appears to have no trouble in it, actually takes great pride in it. Ash has caught the rest of the cast, on several different occasions, using it to take photos of themselves with a stunning, ginger beard, which amuses her to no end, as it was something Roger was want to do on occasion when he got bored back in the day.

On the night of the Oscars, at the afterparty, Ash uploads two videos in the same post, one from set, and one from that night. They’re simply captioned ‘Me & The Champions. 2018/19′.

The video from on set is from the final day; Ash’s hands are shaking the camera slightly, but her voice is loud and clear, ringing throughout the set; 

“Where are my kids?” And like clockwork, Ben, Gwilym, Rami, and Joe all come out from various places, followed by Lucy and Karen, all giving her fond looks.

“Oh man, I’m gonna miss my set-mom,” Joe looks like the thought genuinely pains his heart, and as the realization dawns on the others, there’s a fond and faintly forlorn expression mirrored on all their faces. Joe’s the first to go in for the hug, despite Ash’s faint ‘oh Jesus Christ, Trixie’, but they all soon join.

The second video is from right after the Oscars awards ceremony, when most of the cast and crew who’d been attending are doing photo opportunities, and while Brian and Roger are already with them, Ash had hung back.

“It’s so good to see all my kids in the one place!” She calls, and Joe’s expression lights up as he hears her voice.

“Ma, we won!” Rami holds up his Oscar with delight, already a little tipsy, as were the rest of them as they crowd Ash, all wrapping her up in a group hug. Someone’s humming We Are The Champions. Ash suspects Joe. But she takes delight in the moment anyways, pride flaring bright in her chest.

[nikatyler]

End of the Year 2019

How is it the end of the year already?! It feels like yesterday when I took the pictures from the first row. Looking back at 2019, it was a weird year for me. I’ve had some of the best of times and some of the worst of times. My self-esteem was at its highest and at its lowest too. And when I think of all that has happened, this year feels both too short and too long at the same time. I’ve achieved and ruined so much.

You guys have seen a lot here, and as always, we are going to look back at it. You can check the posts for 2016 here, 2017 here and 2018 here and here. I will be doing a separate post for my favourite non-story pictures later, because there’s been a lot of them too. WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE. I mean, bold of you to assume I’ll stop.

January: We started off by finishing the rose generation, which was one wild ride that I enjoyed a lot. Not pictured: the very unexpected birth of Lucian and Ross’s transformation into a vampire. I thought that’s where the story would end. I thought I’d move to the next generation and he’d be just a side character that shows up sometimes because well, he has to. Family and all that. As we all know, he’s still stealing the spotlight and not always in a...good way. But we’ll get there.

February: Gen 6. I still think Kayla is my cutest irrelevant spare. Well, a spare’s kid. The first fire accident. This one ended well, Adam saved himself. And that last picture...I don’t know, I just love when ghosts show up on the lot at night, okay. And ghost!Tyler is a whole mood.

March: Regaaaaan ♥ Quads’ storylines. The second fire accident. This one didn’t end well, but I was weak and quit without saving. I mean, I was also in the middle of a storyline. If Miracle had suddenly dropped dead, I would have had to rewrite everything, and I wasn’t into that.

April: Quads aged up and their storylines more or less wrapped up. I think we’ll be seeing less of them when the legacy comes back. We can only hope StoryProgression will be nice to them. Will and Roan though. Oh my god, these two. They weren’t supposed to do much but they played quite a role in a later storyline. I love them. Their storyline is definitely my most favourite out of all quads’ storylines. And finally, Regan leaves for Isla Paradiso.

May: Courtney and Felix got married and you still haven’t seen their baby. Whoops. Regan made friends in Isla Paradiso. I love George and Lou with my entire heart. Oh and of course, she made more than just friends there. Shit’s about to go down.

June: Shit really went down but I had so much fun working on this storyline. Just...give me strong emotions to work with and I’ll go wild. At the end of the month, I finally started posting my BPR. Did I tell you that it started off as a bitter joke? Which is ironic because they’re berry sweet sims. Okay, that wasn’t funny at all, I’m sorry.

July: More BPR. Gen 1 was quite uneventful and boring, I know, but just you wait for gen 2. It’s been done in true simmeronnie fashion, your favs aliens and fires may or may not return but you didn’t hear that from me. Anyway, yeah. Eden. Just like Ross, he’s another sim that starts off as an ass who refuses to take care of his child but then as the time goes, he changes for the better and long story short at the moment I love him even though he’s still a dick sometimes. Like when he refuses proposals. But you didn’t hear that from me either. Next up we have Gwyneth and Vanessa. I’ve said this before but Vanessa...she’s a good match for Gwyn and I’m happy they’re together, but there’s something about her that I just don’t like. For example, why the hell can’t you let go, Vanessa. Why do you have to keep holding those grudges. (says the person who holds a million irrational grudges too but ok go off ron maybe the reason why you don’t like that is because you see yourself in that) Oh and yeah, even though they’re not my favourite couple and I don’t even like one of them, they have the cutest proposal pics I’ve ever taken. Period.

August: More BPR. At this point there have been less alien jokes so they decided to come back to remind us they still exist and they still want to be my brand. Sorry my dudes, that’s probably not happening again. Oh. I started posting my BC in August. I’ll post the rest too, I promise. I’m actually almost done, I need to finish the last episode. Soon, hopefully. But yeah, BC will return. And more BPR...I love Roxanne. She’s a lot like me. She writes weird stories about aliens, likes her characters more than real people and sometimes eats weird shit for breakfast. (let’s just say my eating habits have become quite interesting ever since I moved to a dorm...)

September: Oh god, this rivalry between Eden and Vanessa...well, it’s not even a rivalry, Vanessa just hates him. “You weren’t nice to my wife? Cancelled, and no I don’t care that you’re making up for it now.” Magnolia is my favourite evil sim and I love this alliance her younger siblings have formed against her haha.

October: The moment you’ve been waiting for, NSB is back! Ross keeps wanting to hang out with Sunset, which makes me cry because it shows how far he’s come. Sunset and Dawn...when I was playing the yellow gen, I wasn’t even into them as much as I am into them now. They’re finally getting the development they deserve through the ask games. They’re the soft adorable couple that I need to balance out the overdramatic mess that said no to happily ever after...amirite Ross and Caleb? Not that it’s their fault that their happily ever after was just temporary but shhh.

November: Crystal and Claudia are born. I love these girls so much. Claudia reminds me of her grandfather in some way and because of that I’m kinda scared of what her generation will be like, but also I can’t wait to play it haha. Grandpa!Ross is a thing I didn’t know I needed. Oh and would you look at that, another fire accident.

December: This month started nicely, right? Sunset and Dawn got married...and then...then my worst fuckup of 2019 (second worst actually but we won’t be getting into the first one) happened. I didn’t include a picture of that because we don’t need to be reminded of that, do we? Instead, there’s a picture of when things were alright again. I love these two boys ;-; Please make sure they’re safe from me. I don’t care what it takes, just make sure nothing happens to them again. My heart wouldn’t take it. (says the person whose first reaction to seeing that Ross is dying was hysterical laughter but again go off sis) And finally, the family is moving into a new house. Which reminds me, I should put the old small one on the gallery. Will do that.

Thank you for a lit an amazing 2019!

Now let’s just hope that 2020 is less lit...if you know what I mean.

[onhirel]

Of Texts and Cucumbers

The day after Amanda and her friends bumped into Hannah and the other Luna Nova students in the store found her at Akko’s house. At this point, she was basically a second daughter to the Kagaris, the same as she was for Constanze’s and Jasminka’s families. It wasn’t an exaggeration to say that she spent more time living with her friends than at her family’s house, and given what little they knew about her home life, they didn’t complain, especially since she went out of her way to help with chores and be respectful of those taking care of her. She had fun being a rebel at school because school really didn’t matter and it was fun seeing just how much she could annoy her teachers. But for those who selflessly opened their doors for her? She wouldn’t dare dishonor their hospitality by being a brat, not when they were saving her from...

“Hey, you can use the bathroom first,” Akko said, breaking Amanda out of her dark thoughts, and Amanda looked up from her cellphone. It was well after dinner, and they were winding down for the night, Amanda’s sleeping bag already laid out on the small inflatable mattress.

Yawning, Amanda tossed her cell phone on top of her sleeping bag before making her way past (and sometimes over) the clutter of Akko’s room to the attached half bath. At this point she already had her own set of toiletries that had a permanent spot in her friend’s cupboard, and soon she was brushing her teeth when a soft chime and buzz came from the bedroom.

“Hey, you just got a text,” Akko lazily called, and Amanda frowned thoughtfully. It was almost ten at night, who was texting her this late?

“Who ih it?” she managed to mumble past a mouthful of toothpaste foam, and she heard Akko shifting on her bed.

“Uhh, looks like it’s from that girl from the supermarket yesterday, Hannah? You want me to open it?”

Huh. Well, not the latest she had received a message from the Luna Nova girl.  “Yuh,” she managed to say before resuming brushing her teeth, and there was a moment of silence as Akko put in the code for her phone. They both knew each other’s codes, and had precious little they hid from one another, and Hannah had never sent anything that Amanda would consider hiding, anyway, so-

“Oh my God!” Akko exclaimed, voice shocked.

-aaaand of course this message was the one that apparently changed that. Of course it was! Not even taking the time to spit out the foam in her mouth, Amanda peered into the bedroom to see Akko staring at her phone with wide eyes. “Wuh?!”

Akko cleared her throat before looking up at her with mischeviously sparkling eyes. Oh, that wasn’t a good sign! “‘Bee-tee-double-yoo, that cucumber you put in the cart came in really handy tonight,’” she read off, and Amanda promptly sucked in a startled breath, only to start choking on her toothpaste foam.

Finally, after a few moments of nearly dying while Akko merely laughed at her (some friend she was!), Amanda managed to spit out the rest of the foam and rinse out her mouth and run into the room, snatching her phone from Akko...just as it chimed again, and they both froze, Akko grinning wickedly and Amanda blushing heavily.

“Wow, Amanda, I didn’t know you were in that sort of a relationship with her,” Akko teased, and Amanda scowled.

“Sh-shut up, I’m not!” she snapped as she summoned the courage to read the newest message. 

‘ur frnd picked a good one ’ the message read, and Amanda stared at the phone, uncertain how to process it. Sure, they had picked stuff that could be used for that, but it had just been a prank, she didn’t expect anyone to actually-! The phone chimed again. 

‘it was just the right length and prfctly firm’

And again.

‘it satisfied ALL my cravings’

By now, Amanda was beet red, and Akko was barely able to keep from laughing out loud. “Oh my God, you should see your face!” she crowed, and Amanda was too flustered by the messages to come up with a retort. This...this was not what she’d expect in a million years. One only had to spend about five minutes in the presence of Hannah to know that she was sassy and confident as hell, but this was so much more than that!

Numbly, she quickly typed out her response. ‘Uhhhh...’ before hitting send.

The reply didn’t take long to come in. ‘oh, don’t believe me? Here, i’ll send u a pic...’

Amanda’s reaction was immediate. “Nope!” she yelped as she fairly threw her phone away from her, never mind that getting a pic like that...well, the thought of seeing Hannah doing something dirty with a cucumber did funny things to her stomach, and she was old enough and experienced enough to know what those butterflies meant, but she refused to give it any more thought because that was dangerous!

Akko shot her a confused glance before she picked up Amanda’s phone and read the messages, her eyebrows rising almost all the way to her hairline as she began to blush...just as the phone chimed again. Akko stared at the phone for a moment, mouth agape, and Amanda was scared to ask exactly what Hannah had sent. Then Akko snorted, her face dropping into the blankets on her bed, and she began to howl with laughter, drumming her feet and free hand against the mattress.

“What?!” Amanda asked, confused at the reaction.

“Oh, wow, I like this one!” Akko snorted as she handed Amanda back her phone, and Amanda peered at the screen, only to see Hannah sitting at a dining room table, fully dressed and entirely decent, an absolutely cheeky grin on her face and a serving bowl full of salad on her lap, prominently featuring sliced and quartered cucumber.

“Oh, what the fu-!” Amanda started, only to be cut off by Mrs. Kagari, who just so bloody happened to be walking by at the exact moment, because of course she was!

“Language,” she called in an almost sing-song voice, and Amanda sighed.

“Yes, Mrs. Kagari,” she droned obediently before turning her attention back to her phone. Okay, two could play this game! ‘I’m glad my cukes sated u,’ she quickly typed out. ‘If u need any more, u kno where to get them’

Once again, Hannah’s response didn’t take long. ‘bby, i’ll take your cucumbers ANY day!’

Amanda stared at the response, feeling another blush dusting her cheeks, but at the same time, she smiled. It wasn’t very often that someone got the drop on her like that, and the thought of the challenge was...nice. That said...

“Hey, Akko?” she asked, and her friend tilted her head questioningly. “Remind me to get a nice, big cucumber the day that Hannah goes to the haunted maze.”

Akko snorted at that, and soon the two of them were laughing quietly. Well, at least one thing was certain...a friendship with Hannah certainly wasn’t going to be boring...

...and honestly, Amanda wouldn’t want it any other way!

[builder051]

Risk and reward, part 2

This is part 2 of what I expect to be a 3-part arc featuring Ash, with cameos from the rest of the Mike&Co cast.  

Find character info here.

Find the previous installment here.

This chapter contains violence, implied homophobia, and 911 calls.

_____

Ash is on the point of answering when someone calls out to him.  A dark figure approaches, walking down the sidewalk in the opposite direction.  

“Huh?”  Ash stares at the as they pass each other.

“I said, is that an iPhone?” the guy repeats loudly.

“Yeah?”  Ash wonders why it matters.  He’s already zoomed halfway down the block.    He shakes his head and looks forward again.

“Well then you better give it to me.  And your wallet.”  The second man emerges from the shadows before Ash has the chance to slow down.  He stumbles off his board a second before they collide, but it doesn’t stop the large fist from colliding with the side of his face.  Ash staggers, dizzy.  His phone hits the pavement.  Then his head does too.

_____

“Ash?”  Mike holds the phone an inch away from her ear as the line crackles loudly.  “What the fuck?”

The call’s still connected.  Her screen glows, showing a years-old profile pic of Ash sticking his tongue out.  “What did you do, you idiot?  Did you drop your phone?”

There’s no answer.  There is movement, though.  Heavy footsteps and what sounds like wind noise.  Then a voice that’s decidedly not Ash.  “Pat him down.  Check his pockets.”

It takes Mike a second to process.  “What the hell?” she mutters.  This can’t be real.  This only happens in movies.

“Gimme your wallet and you won’t get hurt.  Well, not too bad.”

“Get away from me.  What did I ever do to you?”  That sounds like Ash.  But its thick and muffled.  He’s already hurting.

“We’ll call it wrong place, wrong time.”  There’s a gruff laugh.

Then a third voice speaks, this one much closer to Ash’s phone.  “What the--?”  Static plays over the line, and the sounds shift quieter, then louder again.  “Fuck.  He was talking to somebody.”

So two attackers?  Mike swallows her shock and tries to memorize the details.  This guy has Ash’s phone.  The other one has Ash.  

“Ash?” Mike yells, cramming her phone against her mouth.  “Fucking run!  Get out of there!”

“Shit.  Hang up before they call the cops!”  A muffled thump.  A cry of pain.

“Who were you talking to, huh?”  There’s a tap of thick fingers against the screen.

“Ash!”  Mike tries again  “Run, Ash!”

“Ash, run!” the goon parrots.  He laughs cruelly.  “Is that your girlfriend?”

“Hey, you fucking stop,” Mike spits.  Anger surges, and she’s glad for it.  It’s easier to deal with than fear.  “Fucking let him go!”  She hears impact again, and Ash moans.

“Ha.  Mike.”  More laughter.  “I fucking knew it.  Your pansy-ass boyfriend isn’t coming to save your pansy ass.”

“You shut the fuck up,” Mike rises up on her knees, knocking her laptop off the bed.  “Get out of there, Ash!”  She can see the events unfolding in her mind’s eye, each one shoving another arrow into her heart.  Her stupid nickname, Ash’s tendencies to fill his contacts with emojis instead of useful information, the goddamn stick figure drawing she’d sent him instead of a profile picture…  It’s easy to misinterpret, even for someone with an intelligence level higher than that of the average street robber.

“Nah, you’re not going anywhere.”

“Here, get his wallet.”

“Hey, fuck you!” Mike screeches.  “You fucking--”  

The line crackles again, then goes dead.

“Ash?  Come on.  Ash?”  She knows there won’t be a reply, but she can’t seem to stop asking.  “Fuck.  Ash?”

Mike’s door bursts open.  Jason fumbles the light switch, then stands in the doorway, squinting.  “What the hell are you doing?” he asks sleepily.  “What the fuck?”

“Goddammit!”  Mike lowers her phone, watching the screen fade to black.  “Fuck.  Ugh.  What the hell am I supposed to do?”

“What are you doing?  Why are you screaming?” Jason blubbers, rubbing his eyes.

“I--fucking Ash,” Mike says, looking at her brother and acutely aware of how much she’s shaking.  “He’s getting mugged or something.  What the fuck am I supposed to do?”

“Wait, what?”  Jason shakes his head.  “Ash?”

“Yeah, he called me, and they robbed him, and, fuck, I don’t know--”

“He called you for help?”  

Jason’s fixated on the wrong part, and Mike has no patience for him.  “No, before that,” she says.  “But he’s not here.  He’s at home.  I don’t-- like, what do I…?”  Her throat goes tight.  The urge to help is alien to her.  But it’s born of protective instincts, some overgrown aspect of her inability to turn away from a fight.  

“God, Mike, I don’t know…”  Jason comes to sit on the end of Mike’s bed just as Colby appears, looking much more awake.

“What?  You ok?”  Under any other circumstances, Mike would care about the differences in Colby’s and Jason’s approaches.  But today there’s no time to spare on an answer.  

“Ash is getting beat up, and he called me from fucking Ann Arbor, and he’s probably dying in the street two hours away from here,” Mike blurts, eager to push out the words as quickly as she can.  The pressure of building tears makes her head throb.  It’s a feeling she’s unfortunately used to, but that doesn’t make it any more pleasant.  

“Ok, um…”  Colby blinks a few times.  He barely knows Ash, probably barely comprehends what Mike just said.  He drops a comforting hand on Jason’s shoulder and fixes his eyes on Mike’s.  “I think you should call the cops.”

“But it’s a different city!”  Here comes the anger again.  At least if Mike’s loud, she’s not sobbing.  “They won’t do anything!”

“Maybe they can connect you or something.”  Colby bites his lip.  “I mean, it’s worth a shot.”

“They won’t fucking do anything,” Mike says.  But she wakes the screen on her phone anyway.

“Do you want me to call?  ‘Cause I will.”  Colby holds out his hand.  It’s how he operates, pressing Mike’s buttons and driving her up the wall in exactly the right way.  Mike wonders if he even realizes he’s doing it.

“I can do it,” she mutters defensively, dialing 911 and putting the phone on speaker.

“911, please state your emergency,” a young, female-sounding voice answers.

“I, um, ok.”  Mike takes a breath.  “My friend’s getting mugged.  They beat him up and took his phone, and he’s hurt, I think.”

“What’s the location?”

“He’s in Ann Arbor,” Mike says.  She realizes she’s unsure where in Ann Arbor, making her even more unhelpful.  She can rattle off Hannah’s address, give a general description of the neighborhood, but she doesn’t know where Ash’s apartment is, whether it’s north or south or closer to the university.

“Ok.  This is East Lansing PD,” the operator says, sounding confused.

“Yeah, I live here,” Mike replies.  “He’s in Ann Arbor.  We were on the phone, and then the call got fucked up, and he’s getting robbed.  They were beating him up!”

“Something happened during the phone call?” the operator clarifies.

“Yes!” Mike shouts, exasperated.  “I heard it.  There were two of them, taking his shit and hitting him!”

“Ok, sweetie, try to stay calm.  Is he conscious, do you think?”

“Don’t fucking call me sweetie!  I don’t know.  I’m not fucking there.”  Tears begin to drip from the corners of Mike’s eyes.  “It’s all my fucking fault.”

“Take a breath,” the operator soothes.  Mike doesn’t on principle.  

Colby clambers onto the bed between Jason and Mike.  He gently grabs Mike’s wrist and pulls the phone toward himself.  

“This is her roommate,” Colby chimes in.  “She’s really worried about her friend.”

“Ok, yes, I understand,” the operator says.  “It’s just, it’s a different PD.  I can’t dispatch from here.”

“Can you transfer the call?”  Colby’s younger than Mike.  She wonders how on earth he’s so mature.

“No, but I can give you the number.  You can request a welfare check and let them know you suspect an assault.”

“Ok, ok, yeah, good,” Colby says.  He leans over and digs a sharpie out of the mess on Mike’s bedside table.  He scribbles the number on his palm as the operator reads it off, then thanks her profusely.  

“That was a fucking waste of time,” Mike mumbles.  The operator wasn’t inept, but Mike choses to color her that way anyway.  It helps write over the piece of truth she’d spilled.  Mike doesn’t want to think about it, but it is all her fault.

“No it wasn’t.”  Colby takes Mike’s phone and starts dialing.  He nudges Jason in the back with his knee.  “Why don’t you go back to bed.  I’ll be right there.”  Then he looks at Mike, his gaze earnest again.  “We’re gonna take care of this.  It’s gonna be ok.”

Every part of Mike screams for her to contradict him.  He’s being too optimistic.  And she’s been lied to too many times to give the words any weight.  But deep in her heart, she wants them to be true.  So she stays silent as the phone line begins to ring.